#I NEED HIM TO TELL DEAN IT WASNT OKAY FOR HIM TO MAKE DEAN LOOK AFTER SAM

[fatallyaddictedtofiction]

Cryinnggggg i want to see John love his damn kidssss my heart hurts i want him to hug his sons and talk to them about something that isnt to do with Huntinggggg fuck mannnn

[river13245]

They React To You Being Asexual

Dean, Sam, Castiel, Crowley, Rowena, Lucifer

(this is going to be a thing that I do regularly so request)

Dean Winchester

The both of you have been dating for almost a month now. You weren't oblivious to the fact that Dean was a very touchy guy. He would go to bars and pick up women all the time before you came around. Maybe that's why you had a pit in your stomach. You go to dean who was in the main room of the bunker and ask dean if you could talk to him in private.

He gets up and walks into your guys's room. "what's going on. Something happen?" he asks and you shake your head. "no not yet. Uh I just thought I should tell you something" He sits down on the bed and looks at you. :alright what's going on?" you take a deep breath in and speak all in one breath "Im asexual. I know that you like sex which is not a fault but I just know i'm not going to be able to give that to you"

He asks you to explain it to him and when you do he nods and its quiet for a moment before he speaks. "babe this isn't going to change anything between us. You don't want sex. that's fine i can take care of myself if i need to. Don't feel bad" when you sit beside him hs places his hand on your thigh and you rest your head on his shoulder.

Sam winchester

Your boyfriend was sitting on the bed reading when you entered the room. He looked so nice in the sweatshirt and sweatpants he was wearing. You were taking a moment to think about how you wanted to tell him that you were asexual.

Sam had never once made you feel as if you had to do anything you didn't want to do. If anything he was always cautious for first moves. your first kiss he leaned in slowly, making you close the gap. He also never really asked or initiated for the both of you to go any further beyond just kissing and cuddling. You had a feeling he knew which made you less nervous. "whets going on in that head of yours" he asks as he looks over at you.

You sit onto the bed beside him. "there's something I need to tell you" he puts his book down to give you his full attention before nodding. You take a breath before saying calmly "i'm asexual. I don't ever want to have sex with you. I should have told you sooner and i'm so sorry I didnt i was just waiting for the right time an-" You stop speaking because sam has placed both of his hands on the sides of your face and kisses your lips. "its okay honey, I have had a feeling that you might be and I still love you either way. Plus i have a lower sex drive than most people so you dont have to worry with me okay?" You nod and you cuddle up against him as he reads a little while longer.

Castiel

You were sitting on your bed just thinking about how you were to tell your boyfriend that you were asexual. Your boyfriend had never really said anything about wanting sex or anything like that but it still made you nervous. You knew Castiel wouldn't break up with you because of it. So once you calmed yourself down a bit you prayed for him. "castiel I need to speak with you"

Wasnt even 2 minutes later and hes standing in front of you. "Theres something on your mind?" he asks and you nod. "yes there is. I just needed to tell you that if we are going to continue our relationship..there will be no sexual acts. Kissing and everything is fine but just not sex."

He looks at you for a moment before he takes your hand in his "That is perfectly fine. Angels dont need to have sex." you lean in and kiss his cheek and hug him

Crowley

Crowley had been in one of his moods today. Your boyfriend was a very moody person. One thing could piss him off so because of this you were not looking forward to telling him about the fact that you are asexual. In fact you were thinking about not telling him. Not for a while anyways.

However when he walked into the room he could see the way you didnt come up to him to welcome him back like you always did. So he crossed his arms and looked at you. "what" you asked as you looked up at him. "What is going on? You arent acting normal" this caused you to roll your eyes at him. "when have I ever been normal" he shrugs but doesn't say anything else which makes you sigh.

You laid down onto the big bed you two shared. "Crowley I am asexual. That's why I haven't made a move to do anything more than kissing" He uncrossed his arms and lays down beside you. "really that's what's got you so weird?" nodding in response he rolls his eyes. "I'm a demon and have lived much longer than you have. You being asexual is the least of my problems. I want to be with you either way"

Rowena

Rowena was doing some of her witchy stuff looking beautiful while she focused. You knew you shouldn't interrupt her but this was eating you alive. Your friends had been talking about their partners and how they were great in bed and everything else. You loved your friends of course but its started to eat away at you. That you couldnt and wouldnt give that to Rowena.

She was a woman and many women want that part of the relationship. That kind if intimacy and you were feeling awful about it. Rowena deserved an explanation so before you could talk yourself out of it you walked up to the table and took a seat. "Rowena Love" She looked up at you and when she noticed how you looked she stopped what she was doing. "what's wrong dear"

You let out a long sigh before explaining to her about what you and your friends were talking about and then you pause for a moment before speaking again. "I know that you probably want that and I cant give it to you. How could you possibly be happy like this" She places both her hands on the sides of your cheeks and kisses your forehead then your lips. "I am happy with you. There has not been a moment where I doubted us or my feelings for you. You are the one that I want to be with for the rest of our time here" She pulls you into a soft hug

Lucifer

You had just walked back into your home and Your partner was sitting on his chair that he had claimed as like his "throne". He had been talking to a few other demons that worked for him and so you tried to walk quickly past them but he made you stop. "where do you think your going?" he wasn't angry he was just confused because you usually greet him when you come back home. You look at him "i'm going to our bedroom"

He could tell by the tone of your voice and your body language that something was wrong. So he quickly made the demons leave before turning to look back at you. "come here" you walked closer to him and he looked at you sitting up more on his chair. "what happened while you were out?" He was very protective over you and it was written all over his face. You knew he was going to find out anyways so you begin to tell him.

You tell him about how your friends were asking about how you and your boyfriend was. Asking how the sex is going etc etc. Lucifer nodded and was actually letting you finish speaking. "when I told them that. We don't have sex because i'm asexual they started judging me and everything." He almost speaks up but you cut him off "why do you stay with me. Lucifer I know that you have had many demons and even other angels in your bed before. Why stay with the one who cant give you what you need"

Lucifer looks at you as if you just said something in a language he didn't understand. He uses his power to bring you closer to him and then he stops and holds his arms out for you. Silently telling you to sit with him and so you do. You sit on his lap and rest your head on his shoulder. "I may have had others share a bed with me. But none of them have had such a emotional hold on me before. You are the one that i fell in love with. Don't ever doubt me or my feelings towards you." he says the last part with such a serious tone and all you can do is nod and let him hold you.

[myabsurddreamjournal]

Fate (Part 3)

Soldier boy x Fem! reader

Summary: Reader is a scientist who is forced to work at lab that they keep soldier boy frozen, she talks and cries to him when she is alone, thinking he can't hear her but he hears everything.

her head was on something comfortable and warm, gentle fingers were brushing her hair. Her mother used to this after certain days, when her mind became so loud, all she could think about were the bad thoughts, the things she saw on the news, the things she heard from radio while sitting on the school bus, that dead body of a fox in the road, crushed by a car.

They haunted her. All her life, Even as a child she knew something was wrong with her, because unlike her, none of her friends were in constant fear and sadness. No matter what she did, Laughing or crying, big part of her was always thinking that she wasnt meant to be in this world.

that this world was wrong.

Fingers were on her cheek now, caressing it softly. She chased it with her head,

-"You sure resembe a kitty"

what?

this wasnt her mothers voice.

She opened her eyes in shock, A very familiar face with green eyes was looking down on her.

-"S-soldier boy!?"

-"I was afraid that you hit your head too hard back there"

Suddenly she was aware of sharp ache on the side of her head. But there was something else, her head, it was in his lap! heartbeat starting to speed up, she tried to stand up but his hand on her shoulder prevented it.

"Don't." he said sternly. "You need to lay down for a while"

"O-Okay.."

"H-how? " i mean w-what happened? where am i?"

"in a plane, we are going back to U.S."

she looked at him confusedly.

"You passed out back there, i carried you." he added.

upon hearing this, she looked at the surroundings, giant boxes and packets were everywhere. No seats were in sight. "must be a cargo plane" she thought. But why did she passed out?

she tried to recall past few hours, the sirens, and gunshots, the tall guy telling her to wake him up,

the last thing she remember was throwing that damn ashtray, then..

Him saying her name.

how could he know that?, it was impossible

"it could only happen if he was.." told a voice inside her.

suddenly, a horrible feeling started to form in her gut.

-"h-how do you know my name" she asked with a trembling voice, Praying that answer wouldnt be the one she expected.

-"i heard everyhting you told me."

For a few seconds, she was silent, the weight of what she just heard making her dizzy.

She tried to fight the feeling, not wanting to be so weak in front of him.

But when his hands started to stroke her hair again, her eyes became glassy, she closed them, tears falling on her cheeks,

she couldnt believe it, didn't want to believe it, all this time he was there, hearing her while she was crying and telling everything about her life to him, apologizing to him.

Admiring to him.

Taking his blood. Poking him with needles.

he was aware of everything they did.

She was sobbing now, trying to be quiet, she covered her face with hands but soldier boy pulled them away moments later,

-"Why are you crying doll?" he asked,

-"B-because i-i always found solace at the thought, that you were not in pain anymore, that you were asleep so you couldn't feel it." I never wanted to do the things they told me, the thin-

she couldnt finish because he lifted her chin with his finger, making her look at his eyes directly.

she gasped at what she saw, his green eyes,

they were burning, burning with rage.

she could almost see the flames in them, like in her dreams. The dreams she had since she was a child.

he leaned towards her and slowly took her arm in his hand, looking at the burn mark there.

-"they will pay for what they did." He said,

-"To you and me."

Notes: I hope you guys liked it! your comments are really important to me, also, do you guys also hate the world? Always feel free to talk to me :)

taglist: @deans-spinster-witch @mfnqueen1 @ponypickle @butchers-girl @verypostcrown

[queensilber]

Supernatural: Witch‘s Canyon

Posting everything in this book that i think you need to know, lets go!

Summary:

Okay, so, the boys head to the Grand Canyon to solve a case of a fourty-year murder cycle. The spirits of variouse humans and animals alike attack the locals and they need to find out why and how to stop it.

It is set somewhere in Season two.

My opinion:

This was so much fun. Like, it was really like watching an episode, just a lot longer and with the magic ability to see into Sam and Deans (and a bunch of other characters) heads.

It also gave a little bit of a fanfiction vibe, just with the addidtion that everything is cannon and that all the random little facts and quotes are a real thing (i‘ll list those in a second)

And also there were flashbacks of their childhood??? That made me cry??? I hated john winchester before, but now even more so. (More about the flashbacks below too)

So yea, it was definetly worth it and i cant wait to read the others!!

Songs:

This is the music Sam and Dean listened to during the course of the book (some locals listened to music too, but i did not list those)

- „paranoid“ by Black Sabbath

- „turn the page“ by Bob Seger

- unspecified tape by Bad Company

Flashbacks:

There are two flashbacks to Sam and Dean‘s Childhood:

- the first one is Dean Remembering a time when John made him and Sam run through an obstacle course at age twelve and eight. Dean had to shoot a gun during it, Sam just had to point and yell „Bang!“.

In the process of that Sam got injured and cried and John yelled at him to keep going and that he was doing poorly. Dean comforted his brother and encouraged him, leading to sam actually making it. Sam did it and Dean cheered, but john kept yelling at them to keep going to the next obstacle.

- the second one was from when Dean was fourteen and Sam was ten. Their Dad gave them backbags and said what was in them could last them fir four days and they all went on a hike together.

In the middle of nowhere john then saud that they should not trust anyone on what they are told and left them alone, telling them that they should find their way (at very least two days of walk) back themsleves and they shouldnt have relied on him so much and he just… left.

When they checked their backbags they found that most in it was useless and they were also filled with rocks to make it seem like it was more than it was.

Thats so fucked up, like

Those are children. And the worst part, when Dean rememvers this he thinks of it almost positively because it taught him a valuable lesson. I cant even begin to describe how my heart hurt for them.

Random facts:

Here are some facts from the book, i do t know anymor if those are mentioned in the show too, but it hardly matters, i think:

- Sam outgrew Dean at the age of 16

- Dean felt gutity over Jessicas death and thought that it was a „more solid basis“ of guilt than Sam had on the matter

- Sam can differentiate between uniforms of different wars in history just by a look

- Dean hates Rats. A lot.

Quotes:

Some quotes from the book:

John Winchester hunted monsters, ghosts, demons — the creatures most people only believed in deep down in their 3:00 am hearts, abd that they laughted off when the sun was bright and their spirits high.

It was a habit Dean had picked up from Dad — reffering to what they did as a „job“. To Sam it was nore of a Mission, even a calling.

„Sammy really likes cops,“ Dean said. „If he didnt have any talents he might have become one“

Sometimes he thought Dean wouldnt mind dying if he could go out in a blaze of glory, as the saying went. In moments of fairness, Sam knew that wasnt true. Dean didnt care about the glory; he cared about making a difference.

„I‘m coming around to the point, Sam.“ „He‘s Dean,“ Sam corrected. „I‘m Sam“. „Sorry, For some reason, you just look more like a Dean to me“

Gilmore Girls reference?

„You tried to shoot my brother“ Dean said.

Sam belived in a highter power, Dean didnt. Sam didnt have any special knowledge that Dean lacked, handt seen or heard or met God.

Lol, not yet.

Dean had been a kid, hadnt ever had a chance to become anything other than what Dad had made of him. That, finally, was the gulf between them — the canyon that could never be bridged.

Dean was an amazing guy, Sam knew, with skills and abilities most people would never imagine, and smarts Dean himself wouldnt credit, even though he relied on them all the time. And yet, at times like this, he was so humble, so unassuming, that he seemed almost unaware of the importance if his iwn contributions. At other times, of course, that humility vanished. Knowing and accepting both Deans, he guessed, was what being brothers was all about. Maybe I wouldnt want to be Dean, he thought, but i‘m sure glad I have him araound.

STOP MAKING MY CRY WTH

So anyways, that book sure was an experiance and i cant wait for the next one! I‘ll post a review of that as well and will update that post with a link to it one i‘m done!

Xoxo! <3

Next>

[adidegmez]

spn s15 spoilers

s15 ep1(back and to the future)

one last time, the road so far. the demon is funny. i love big brother dean. their lat scene was awesome. we got work to do, this Show is going to kill me. this is the last season. their story will end. probably with a sad ending. i dont want to say goodbye.

s15 ep2(raising hell)

ketch! hi ketch. he knows how to make an enterance. rowena and ketch? rowena cared about jack. amara, i didnt think we would see her. kevin, ive missed you. where is jack, he was in the empty what is he doing now? we started saying goodbyes with kevin. and this will go on. i hate goodbyes.

s15 ep3(the rupture)

i miss crowley. ketch died. They're slowly removing everyone from the story. We're nearing the end. and now rowena. rowena is complicated, i love her. i thought rowena would want sam to kill her so that she could e the queen of hell or something like that. maybe she can return as queen of ell that would e nice. adam is still in the cage. dean, why are you so mad at cas? cant you forgive him? i wouldnt want their story to and like this but dean sam and cas theyre alive. there are 17 eps left. things will go bad. i hope they can get a happy ending, i hope they will all live but i dont think they will.

s15 ep4(atomic monsters)

i thought i saw benny. we got him and lost him in a minute. dean is gorgeous(i had to say it, he is always gorgeous). i love seeing deans smile, sam and cas too but dean is different, he is my favorite. becky, wow, she has a family? i would love to see team free will just doing laundry and talking with eachother without worrying about monsters. im happy for becky. becky youre gonna ruin winchesters life. poor boy it wasnt his fault but if he cant control it he has to die. if only there could be another way. Did Jensen sing the song? If anyone knows the name of the song, can you tell me? dean is hopeful we need that but Chuck is not gone. and he is going to ruin things. he will make the winchesters suffer, just because he enjoys it and doesnt like the winchesters anymore. and thats why i hate him

s15 ep5(proverbs 17:3)

why is sam having those dreams? is Chuck messing with his head? everyone is confused about deans pictures but he looks the same maybe a little bit older but same look. he even has the same hair. sam is the one WHO changed he look very different especially his hair. that doesnt make any sense everyone is suprised at deans not sams? lilith?!! only thing thet can kill the god (except jack i think) is gone. nice there is a link they can use that link. you were never free dean. i wish amara ould help them. maybe se will help them. but they need jack.

s15 ep6(golden time)

now eileen. Chuck is trying to break the winchesters. Dean doesn't seem to care because he's tired of playing Chuck's games and there doesn't seem to be any way they can beat Chuck right now. If they can find a way, Dean will go back to his old self. and they will beat Chuck. together, team free will (2.0 maybe jack will come too). what happened to banes twins. will we see them again? eileen is okay. well at least we have one good thing. Chuck is messing with cas now.

s15 ep7(last call)

dean is amazing, jensen is amazing. i love when he sings. he was happy at that bar, i love seeing him happy. it was good to see him happy in this last season, i hope we can see them happy more. sam cant die. they can beat Chuck but they still need help(maybe jack can help them)

s15 ep8(our father, who aren't in heaven)

they finally remembered adam. i love donatello but i miss kevin. hello rowena! i miss crowley, im glad she is the one whos in charge. i love rowena. adam is out of the cage. eileen and sam could be together. Chuck will kill eileen, right? Dean, you shouldn't still be mad at Cas, we're getting close to the end and you two shouldn't stay on bad terms anymore. i want jack back, when is he coming? okay, i hate Chuck. i used to love him when he was just a prophet but as god no i dont like him. he just watched all of them suffer and enjoyed it. and he is stil hurting them. he is a monster. i like this Michael. thanks to cage and adam he is better now. adam is in a better situation than the others. purgatory, i hope we can at least see benny.

s15 ep9(the trap)

of course chuck was behind all of this. benny is dead. when someone dies in purgatory where would they go? i thought they would born again in purgatory. dean finally forgave cas. No, this ending definitely wouldn't happen. Even if Sam and Dean had turned into monsters, they wouldn't have become monsters. They wouldn't have fought Bobby and Jody. They would have let them kill themselves. Cas is getting the mark. I hope this doesn't end badly like Dean's. jack!!! yes. why is billie doing this? idc Shell bring jack back. and he'll beat god. how can the light be bad? if hes bad, how can there be balance?

s15 ep10(the heroes' journey)

do they have bad luck or something? its Chuck isnt it? i heard some people say, garth didnt named his kid dean because he knew sam would name his kid dean and this makes sense to me. at least nothing bad happened to garth and his family. yeah they cant be normal. it was funny to see them like that but this isnt WHO they are.

s15 ep11(the gamblers)

hi jack! you finally came. my heroes. they are going to save the World. with cas and jack.

s15 ep12(galaxy brain)

I had forgotten about Kaia. Jack now has powers but he won't be able to use them. Kaia will be a problem. i hate Chuck. he is bored so he is destroying worlds. he needs to go. i loved old dean more.

s15 ep13(destiny's child)

when i watched about scoobynatural, i thought team would travel through different universes. for at least one season we couldve just watch them travel have fun save people but no they cant have fun more than one episode. if someone would help jack he can rule instead of Chuck. jack doesnt have a soul but he is good. i wish he had his soul. i loved meg. jack got his soul back, finally.

s15 ep14(last holiday)

i love deans reaction. cant they live like this? they are happy. of course they cant, Chuck wouldnt let that happen. Jack began to speak his father's language:) . dean, the birthday cake was nice. i love them.

s15 ep15(gimme shelter)

dean lied again.first to other kaia now amara. i hope he can keep his promise so he wouldnt be lying. jack will sacrifice himself. hopefully cas will find a way.

s15 ep16(drag me away (from you))

i hate seeing winchesters fight, especially when it's so close to the end. I hope they can be back to normal before this is all over.

s15 ep17(unity)

jack's not family? dean how could you say that he is your kid, he is a winchester. i love amara. i hope jack and amara can spend time with eachother. i hate Chuck. he manipulates everyone. it was Chuck all along. if only dean didnt lie to amara. she was nice she was trying to help but now she is dead. now jack is dying again.

s15 ep18(despair)

i want to say jack cant die but i cant be sure of anything. the story is ending in 3 episodes. billie didnt change she always wanted this. okay jack is alive nice. since this is the ep i can say it. cas will die in this ep and i know it. i knew it for a while i hoped this day would never come but here we are. this will be the day i learn this storys ending. i hate billie too. billie left her toy. does that mean theyll reap god and hell die like that and billie read it so she left the weapon to kill Chuck. i love Charlie. she was happy. eileen is gone. i thought maybe she and sam could be together. i love donna. i love garth. i love jody and the girls. i love bobby. Charlie bobby donna i thought they were safe, theyre gone now. i know how this will end cas will summon empty it will kill death and cas. i hope this wont happen but it will. cas will die. their story will end. cas is gone. and he didnt day goodbye to sam and jack. he saved dean. cas is gone.

s15 ep19(inherit the earth)

what is happening to jack? how can they beat God? how can they win? i hate Chuck. he killed miracle. Michael! adam is gone too. i didnt think we would see Michael again. and i didnt think i would be happy to see him but i am. there may be hope yet. maybe they can do something together. i cant deans reaction to lucifer was funny but i cant laugh. he thought cas was alive he thought he came bak and it wasnt cas he saw lucifer. i never thought we would see lucifer. i love lucifer when he is not serious or when he isnt trying to end the World. so he is good for now. i hate lucifer again. yes! Michael killed lucifer, i cant believe it. Michael betrayed them. i liked him. i cant trust anyone but team free will 2.0. i hate Chuck. i would take that ending, i would. they won but hey lost everything but they won and theyre together except cas. there is still one ep left. and evertones back. this is not the perfect ending because cas is not here but its a good ending. if only it was the end. because they are alive. they live. this felt right but why is there another episode. i hope we just see them grow old and live their lives but we wont. i know we wont. i just wish we could. i dont want to watch next ep. i know that ep broke everyone. i know how it ends. but why this should have been the ending. this felt right it wasnt complete but it felt right. this couldve been the ending why make us suffer more? of course i dont want it to end but if the story ending i would want it to be like this. this i want to say perfect but its not cas is gone but it was okay. im not ready to watch the next ep. but here we go one last ep. their story is ending here.

s15 ep20(carry on)

what happened to carry on? why didnt it play. i wanted just one thing i hope it at least plays in the end. im okay with just wathing them live their life without a big bad guy or something. why? why? why? it was always sam and dean, always. why end it like that? they were happy they were together they were both alive. i dont want to say it but dean is gone. sam is alone. bobby, hi! cas is alive?! that what they deserved as heaven. but dean shouldve had more time with sam. but im not going to complain they all can be together again. tahnks to jack and cas. yes this ending break me but it was beautiful. in the end they are happy and they are together forever. i just wish we couldve seen at least cas and jack.

this story was beautiful 2 brothers together with the help of their frinds and family they saved the World. and they got the ending they deserved it was meant to be like this dean would die and sam would live for everyone WHO died. spn writers i think they gave us a gift with jack, they made heaven a good place they made heaven what it was meant to be. and thanks to them and jack winchesters and everyone we cared about is happy. anyway im glad i witnessed their story for 15 seasons i laughed and cried with them. they mean so much to me all of them.

i dont want to say goodbye so this is a see you later because ill be seeing them. ill always remember them. i love all of them. i love dean sam cas jack bobby mary john kevin Charlie jody donna crowley rowena and the others WHO helped winchesters WHO loved winchesters.

im really happy im a part of this fandom. ill never leave here. im looking forward to see spn stuff. so

see you later

[drkcnry67]

SPN Kinktober day 3

Mark our love in Baby

Dean x reader

Impala sex

Tags: virginity loss in backseat of car, cock in pussy, cum in pussy, being laid down pressed against the seat of a classic car, maybe more along these lines if i missed anything let me know

rating: 18+

No summery

it was a lovely day for the beginning of a weekend getaway, your boyfriend of 3 years has planned the perfect weekend getaway for your anniversary complete with a demonic possession, a campsite in the middle of no where, and a surprise that would change your life forever.

yn: baby the person the possessed isnt gonna make it through this

dean: son of a bitch

yn: baby its not the first person lost to possession and it wont be the last.

dean: you're right we will give the body a proper funeral once we expell this demon

you throw down your lighter and encase the demon in a devils trap... the bitch screeches, and starts laughing maniacly

yn: start the exorcism babe, im gonna bless the house to make sure the ground is consecrated to give the soul rest

dean: wait what

yn: did i forget to mention that im a brand new witch

dean: for how long yn

yn: since i went to deal with that out of sorts witch coven a year or so ago... i dont use my powers very often and besides they are still manifesting... i dont have the full powers yet

dean: just stay here do this exorcism with me and then we will discuss this further.

the exorcism done and your boyfriend helping you to bury the body on a small piece of consecrated ground you both go back to the impala.

dean: why did you not tell me about your powers.

yn: why did you sell your soul... dean i did it to save you.... okay i figured that one day you'd find out but i wasnt expecting it to be right now... im

thats when deans lips crashed into your own, the passion, the force, you were now in throws of deep passion with this man that made your heart soar.

he tore off your clothes and laid you in the back of the impala. his touch gentle and sweet, his kisses keeping you from voicing your opinions.

thats when his hands moved to your hips...

dean(breathless): let me know when you want me to stop

yn: never...

dean kisses you again as his cock slides right into your pussy. this made you scream into the kiss. your pussy was clutching dean's now hard cock as it thrust in and out of your pussy.

dean: your pussy is gushing baby, lets mark our love in baby, lets make a baby

yn: yes baby yes cum in me, push me to my limit.

half an hour later you both reached your peak. this was your time to shine, well to release. you reached your peaks at the same time. you squirted all over dean the back seat of the impala and the window...

dean: i never thought baby would see this much action back here but look at that we have officially cristened the back seat of this car.

yn: that was incredible and i couldnt have lost my virginity to a better man. im so glad we waited

dean: let me tell you it wasnt easy but now i feel like we need a different step.. so its time now for my surprise. which i have in my jeans which i think are by your head...

You grab his jeans and hand them to him as he reaches into the pocket and pulls out a small velcro bag.

Dean: now I know this is not the traditional method for this but it was easier than carrying it in a box. So I have a question for you yn...

You watch as he pulls out a small silver band that has one small diamond in the center.

Dean: will you marry me? Share my life with me.

Yn: yes yes yes yes

Dean slides the ring on your finger and begins to fuck you senseless again this time for the right reasons.

[oranges-for-calico]

okay so I kind of just did a long bullet point list in my notes app, so i'm just going to pick some of them and copy them here! spoilers for Broadchurch season one! :) also like.. source material typical content warnings apply. and these were as I was watching so I got a little heated at times sorry about that

also these might be like not entertaining at all. I really don't know

also the dog ends up being okay so don't worry

EPISODE ONE - i looove the trope of somber/creepy music over happy scene. - i like the detective lady so far she’s so passive aggressive. also she’s returning from maternal leave or something - ALEC HARDYYYY

- “cameraphone” what decade is this - 2013, presumably

- “go down to check it out get yourself some fresh air” SENDS HIM. TO THE DEATH SITE OF A CHILD - JACOB ANDERSON AKA LOUIS IS IN IT WHATTTT

- fucking asshole. of course it was fucking twitter this is why twitter sucks. not fucking cool - GO OFF ALEC. BLOODY TWITTER - he’s a little shit is fucking right. die olly - wow the news industry seems very exploitative.

- “why didn’t you look in on him last night” WOAHH THERE - “why didn’t you” - “where were you last night” OOP - YOU HESITATED

- news lady fucking die. heartless fucking asshole who would do that. i hate you. the entire news industry should go die actually how disrespectful can you get

EPISODE TWO

- cctv footage hell yeah alec - alec are u ok - character trope: you think he’s mean but he’s actually just fucking miserable 24/7 - beth is not doing okay omg - rory!!!:)

- who asks a 15 year old for a light - oh she gave the stuffy back oh aw okay she’s kinda sweet fuck. sorry i told you to die reporter lady - “so you’re snooping on me now” SMOOTH LMFAO - how tf can you not remember your mates name. his story has so many holes - i think it’s a red herring though ? dude idk how this show works - you are not slick bro - why is he making that face - HIS PRINTS ARE THERE HAHAHAHHA

EPISODE THREE

- dude i could not commit a murder for many reasons but specifically i would not be able to come up with lies like that

- “you overcompensate” “i know”

- ur alibi is rubbish - there’s bloods in the boat mark. - eeee i’m scared of fishing hooks. that one time we looked at them in girl scouts scared me - “because i’m ashamed innit”

EPISODE FOUR

- nice to see alec in a good mood

EPISODE FIVE

- they’re making tom act as danny in the reconstruction ??? brutal - i keep forgetting this shows from 2013 - okay i hate the fact that the age of consent is 16 there

- awww look at them gossiping - bro i’m sorry i just *can not sympathize with a man who married a 17 year old when he was 40* - oh—

EPISODE SIX - why the creepy music? is toms dad sus - “i’m always alright” that’s a very The Doctor thing to say

- “i didnt assault him it was a joke gone wrong” that’s not a great sentence - WHY do people get so defensive when they’re being questioned. IF IT WASNT YOU JUST PROVIDE THE EVIDENCE . YOU DONT NEED TO GET ANGRY

- oh boy tom what have you got. i mean you’re very sneaky so good job on that but girl please just tell the police what’s going on………..

- dean lives on a farm haha nerd - wow alec is not doing well

- “he used to be my friend” interesting wording tom

- girl nigel did you just steal the dog - that’s not nice - FIND HER BASTARD DOG. NAEW - NON NPLEASE DONT KILL THE DOG - NINOJIJNNO - NOPE

EPISODE SEVEN

- “you nearly died on me” “neowww” - alec you are literally out of breath pleasee go back to the hospital - i love how alec wears a button up over another button up that’s so gay

- OMGGGGGGG SUSAN KNOWS WHO IT IS!!! - tbh i bet it’s nigel, he’s mean and (probably) killed the dog

- ?? - actually do tell alec i’m really curious - oh?? were you having an affair? - OH. SHE WAS HIS WIFE

- FUCK NO NOT THE DOG NO NO - fuck no. no no no no - the dog is okay as of now

EPISODE EIGHT

- OKAY. - NOT THAT IM SURE YET BUT. TOMS DAD IS THE PERFECT KILLER. HES BEEN HERE IN THE BACKGROUND THIS ENTIRE TIMR BUT. HES NEVER BEEN A PRIME SUSPECT - SHOE SIZE MENS TEN FUCJ YEAH - “you’ve done good work on this miller, well done.” - THE SUSPENSE OMGGG - allllec.

- 59 DAYS EARLIER THIS WILL BE GOOOOD

- SHUT UUUUP HES INTERROGATING MILLER LMFAO - it was indeed joe. harsh though lol - can alec get some proper medical attention now

- and i thought they’d hug - FINISHED:)

if you found this entertaining lmk and I will post my notes from season two and three maybe :3 also I took notes while watching deadloch too

i watched Broadchurch last year and took notes like the entire time, would anyone be interested in me posting some of the funny ones?

[toytulini]

thinking about how when i was watching the librarians i kept ignoring Cassandra's queercoding (queer"coding") bc i didnt want to get my hopes up and be disappointed and i really just didnt expect that out of this show. like it was fun but i didnt have high expectations for it u know? but then they actually gave her a vampire gf (briefly, for like that One Episode and idk if they ever bring it up again, but like. canon. right there. on screen) and now im thinking i should rewatch it bc how many wonderful nuggets of gayness did i brush off bc i convinced myself they wouldnt bother to go there and i didnt want to be disappointed.

[image ID: screenshot from "The Librarians" wiki, that reads:

"...crazier. Cassandra says she did not mind having all these girls buying her drinks, and Eve says she likes..."

it is cut off at both ends, focused on the part about Cassandra. end of image ID]

the episode where she briefly became a prince charming archetype and had women fawning all over her is pretty blatant, but how many other moments did i Miss??

[wormstacheangel]

So what you're telling me is that Dean and Cas didn't reunite at the end of the show? That they didn't slam into eachother in a desperate relief hug. Clinging with fist full of bloody clothes as their breaths are hard and labored from a battle. So Dean didn't pull away just enough to look at Cas, just to make sure he was actually there and okay. He didn't reach to cradle Cas's face in relief, a soft chuckle mixed with a sob escaping his lips while he watched Cas smile back at him. And I definitely didn't watch, on my television screen live in front of the whole world, Dean kissing Cas in a big dramatic kiss with 360 camera view so we can see the way Cas's fingers loosen in grip. See that he reaches to hesitantly place a hand on Dean's neck to hold him. Kiss him back while the other laid on Dean's chest, over his heart. As if wanting, needing, to hear his heart beat. And when they pulled away, Dean didn't say "welcome home, cas."

And it didnt show Cas smiling up at him, while the camera pulls back to see people returning after the snap and the family all celebrating? You're telling me that wasnt 15x19? And 15x20 wasnt a beach episode?!

[negandarylsatisfaction]

[SUMMARY: John Winchester gets possessed by a demon making him seduce Dean's girlfriend.]

SMUT

John and Jenna.

Dean had invited you for a weekend work trip with his brother and father. Not really knowing exactly what they did you wanted to go along to spend more time with your boyfriend, it felt like he never had time for you. You had met John a few months back and saw him on and off whenever you'd visit Dean. He seemed like a nice man although he didnt speak much to you.

Arriving at the motel, you and Dean got your separate room while Sam and John stayed together. Helping you and Dean bring the bags into the room, John walked in behind the both of you.

"Thanks dad, I needed to bring some extra things for this trip with what we're dealing with." You over heard Dean tell his father before passing you a bag.

"Just put this in the top cabinet," Dean uttered before heading back out to the car.

"Crap," you struggled on your tip toes to push the heavy bag in the top cabinet as it kept popping back out.

"I got it," suddenly you felt John behind you, pushing the bag in place.

"Oh-" You whispered feeling him press himself against your backside. Turning to him, you weren't sure if he had purposely done that or if it was an innocent mistake.

"Sorry, sweetheart," John looked down at you in a way he never had. It was almost the same look Dean had when he first met you. The look of attraction, the look a man has when he sees a woman he cant help but picture in the most unspoken of ways. Clearing his throat he looked away having truly not meant to let his body get close to yours. Apart of you didnt mind it, you did find Dean's father attractive after all they did look alike.

"Its okay." Nervously you laughed it off as you awkwardly walked towards the rest of the bags. John's eyes followed before the sound of Dean entering the room again made him quickly look away.

"Dad, you're gonna help me over here?" Sam appeared at the doorway looking for John making him remember he had things to look over.

"Yeah. Of course." John walked out leaving you and Dean to yourself.

The next day Sam and Dean planned to go together to investigate a lake close by while John decided to stay behind and finish going over some of his research. Staying in your room, you read a book you bought along with you knowing Dean would be busy with work most of the time. John sat at the desk in his room, his eyes growing tired going through books of research when he decided to take a break. Leaning back on the chair his eyes closed, drifting into a deep sleep. As he slept, a line of dark black smoke creeped into the room and found it's way into John unexpectedly. Instantly shooting his eyes open, John revealed bright golden eyes.

Laying in bed reading your book you suddenly heard the door getting unlocked. Looking up thinking it was Dean you were surprised to see his father stepping inside.

"Mr.Winchester?" You whispered confused as he closed the door behind him, something seemed off with him.

"I got a spare key, I thought Dean returned already." You frowned as you stood up closing your book, his eyes falling to your legs as you had completely forgotten you were only wearing Dean's shirt not expecting anyone to come inside but him.

"Oh-" you looked down at your legs embarrased not noticing just how much John liked what he saw. His eyes for a split second turning a golden shade before you looked back up. You caught his tongue slowly slide over his lip.

"I should change-"

"Dean left you alone here?"

"Y-yeah," John began to shake his head with half a smile as he slowly stepped closer to you.

"Now why the hell would he do that?"

"He went to work, Mr.Winchester."

"Work huh? He should work on giving you more attention."

"What?" You responded confused with his words, never had he spoken to you this way before. He continued to get closer to you as he spoke, you swore you had never seen this look on John's face before. A look of hunger, his eyes even looked darker than usual as he spoke.

"Come on, dont you think he should be more attentive to you?" John smiled in a sneaky manner as he stared down at you. Truth be told, you did wish Dean payed more attention to you, you did wish he was more available to you.

"I...I-"

"I've watched how he is with you," John interrupted.

"I mean I don't know....if I knew my woman was waiting for me the way you look right now, I'd rush right on home." You felt his eyes travel down your body then back up until they met your eyes again. You couldnt believe what he was saying, the way he was looking at you.

"See, if you were mine..things would be very different," John stepped closer making you back against a wall. Your eyes widened in shock at everything that poured out of him.

"Mr.Winchester...what are you doing..?" You whispered.

"Oh, dont tell me you havent caught me looking at you since I met you-" he responded feeling a rush inside him.

"I'm-Im happy with Dean."

"Are you?" He whispered in a husky voice, it's like he could see right through you.

"So if I were to gently brush my hand over your thigh-" he did just that as he stared directly into your eyes.

"You wouldnt like it?" You gasped.

"Please..this isnt right.." You whispered making him smile, he could tell you liked it but didnt want to admit it.

"You're telling me this doesnt turn you on?" His hand now reached in between your thighs feeling the warmth making him moan low.

"But Dean-"

"Shh..." John lifted a finger to your lips as he began to feel you on top of your underwear. You moaned with a sigh of relief closing your eyes as you felt his hand gently grab the side of your neck. John didnt stop moving his fingers in a circular motion against you, you didnt find the strength in you to stop him.

"You like that?" He whispered as you opened your eyes before he leaned in and aggressively kissed you. Submitting to him you took his kiss and let him do as he pleased. His hand still caressing the side of your neck as he bit down on your bottom lip. Your hands ran up his chest before he roughly snapped off the buttons of his flannel shirt. He stepped back slowly unbuttoning his pants and revealed his hardness to you.

"Mr.Winch-"

"John, baby. Call me John."

You bit your lip as he sat back on a chair and motioned for you to get on top of him. Not being able to hold yourself back you walked towards him as he quickly pulled your underwear down and roughly put you on top of him. Instantly you felt him enter you and you began to ride him. The two of you moaned simultaneously as you rode him hard, you had never felt anything like him before. A part of you couldnt believe what you were doing but another part of you didnt want to stop. John pulled your shirt up and pulled your body close to him, sucking on your breasts as you continued to move.

"Oh yeah, Jenna.." John groaned before grabbing your face and kissing you hard as he grinded your hips on him.

"Turn around," John spoke breathlessly as you quickly stood up and did as he asked slowly lowering yourself back down onto him.

"Oh yes.." you whispered.

"Feel better than Dean doesnt it?" He spoke hoarsely and spanked your ass hard making you scream.

"Oh, John..." you moaned as he grabbed you by the waist hard, screaming in pleasure you didnt realize what was happening behind you. In the middle of riding him, the demon was released from John's body. John suddenly realized what the hell he was doing and froze under you. The sensation so intense he almost came in that moment realizing what he was doing. His hands still tightly on your hips as you continued to bounce on him he let out a deep breath.

"Like that?" You moaned looking back at him making him let out a gruff noise as he saw your face.

"Jenna-" he panted as you rode him hard, he couldnt believe what he was doing but you felt so damn good. He couldnt stop you and he couldnt stop himself. You noticed his moans grow deeper before suddenly feeling him stand up and push you face down on the bed. John lost complete control of himself as he thrusted into you.

"I'm sorry-I cant stop-" he grunted low as he continued to drive himself into you. You couldnt understand what he was saying and only felt him move faster.

"John! John!" You screamed with how aggressively he moved your body, holding your arms behind your back, but you loved how it felt.

"Oh my god.." he groaned deeply before pulling out and gasping loudly as he unloaded himself on your ass.

"Wow," you whispered as he stepped away out of breath and you slowly pushed yourself up. Just as you turned to face him he turned away from you. You frowned as he remained quiet fixing himself up, getting dressed.

"John?" You whispered as he leaned his hand on the table lost in his thoughts.

"Are you okay?" You asked making him turn to you and look down at your body.

"Get dressed," he looked away still out of breath, he couldnt take seeing your body bare in front of him.

"What's wrong-"

"That wasnt me," he whispered roughly.

"What?" You let out a chuckle in disbelief.

"Something took over me-" he repeated although he knew you'd have no idea what he meant.

"But I couldnt stop myself after...I didnt wanna stop...Jesus Christ, Jenna..I've wanted you for a while." You stood in silence staring at him, still in shock with what just happened. You had no idea from the moment John met you he was attracted to you.

"John-"

"Please dont say my god damn name like that, I'll take you again before Dean comes." He blurt out and you had to admit he sounded very sexy saying it in his deep voice. But suddenly you remembered Dean and looked away.

"What is it?" He walked towards you with a frown.

"What do you mean what is it? What about Dean..what's he going to think-"

"We dont tell him a damn thing, Jenna." He looked down at you in a very serious manner.

"Leave with me," he suddenly blurt out making your eyes widen.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Leave with me now, we'll go anywhere I just...I need to feel you again tonight and I wont allow Dean to have you again."

"John..." you whispered feeling confused yet aroused with his dominating words.

"Jenna, please." John had no idea what came over him, all he knew was that he couldnt ignore how badly he wanted you.

"I know you want more of me, you're just afraid to admit it. How do you think it's going to be staying around him? You think I'll be able to keep my hands off you, sweetheart?"

"I just-"

"You think I wont try to be inside you every chance I get?" Your eyes practically rolled back at his words, you wanted him just as much as he wanted you.

"Let's go, Jenna. Pack your shit and let's go before he comes."

Without saying a word you gave in and ran around the room collecting your belongings in your backpack. John took hold of your stuff leading you to his truck. Without second guessing anything or looking back, you got in the car and let John drive you away..

[gloriafc]

Amazing Wife

Jack never expected to let anyone close to his heart, until he met you. You had it the instant he laid his eyes on you.

You're a surgeon, a prodigy attending. You're friends with Miranda and Ben, when she was grumbling under her breath you asked her what was wrong, "Ben forgot to grab his lunch, so now I have to cancel my meeting to take it to him." "I can take it. My shift is almost over. I'm just finishing my paperwork."

You walked into the firehouse and Jack instantly walked over towards you with his charm on. "Can I help you with something?" "I'm just looking for Ben. He forgot his lunch." As soon as you finish your sentence Ben rounds the corner, "Prodigy! What brings you here?" You quickly toss the lunch box to him, "You stressing your wife out." Jack watches the two of you interact a little jealous of Ben for the moment. He instantly perks up when he hears Ben offer you a tour of the place, "Alright. I'll bite, only if theres coffee involved."

When you get to the end of the tour Ben shows you the kitchen where almost everyone is waiting for the girl they noticed instantly caught Jack's attention. They attempt to get to know you, not expecting you to be a super human. "Why does Ben call you prodigy?" "I sort of am. I specialize in multiple areas of surgery. Fetal, peds, gynecology, neuro, and plastics."

It takes Jack a few weeks of begging to get Ben to invite to one of their outings after work. Ben gets Miranda to agree to bring you drinking with everyone.

That night Jack manages to get your number, Ben eventually telling him he couldve just asked him for her number, "But what's the fun in that without the chase."

After a few months you begin dating. And Jack doesnt know how to explain it, but dating you is different than all the other woman hes dated before you. Eventually he figures it's because you're way out of his league, but soon realizes it's because you are different from ever single woman hes dated.

He can see how other men look at you, you're young and successful, and you're hot, what couldn't they want? And normally he'd get jealous but he trusts you with his life. The times he does get jealous or you look like you're getting uncomfortable he'll grab you by your hip and pull you close and he'll refuse to let you go for the rest of the night.

After a few years you get married and he finally knows what it's like to have a family of his own, even if it's just the two of you. You manage to talk him into considering getting a cat. And as much as he hates the idea, and hates how much the cat takes up all of your attention he'd get you another one if you asked.

After being married for two years you find out you're pregnant and at first Jack doesnt know how to feel, he doesnt want to end up like the parents hes never met. But you eventually ease him into the idea and then he couldn't be happier especially when you start to show. He's slightly upset he can't lay his head on your stomach as you watch tv anymore, but he's settled for drawing random shapes on your belly and watching the random movements from your child.

Jack is amazed when hes able to feel the baby kick. He goes as far as feeling it at least once a day minimum, if his hands could permanently stayon your stomach they would.

One day the two of you go separate ways, he heads off to work as you take advantage of your day off and decide to run some errands.

When he gets a call hes talking to Dean about random things like always. When they show up at the scene they get the rundown about the scene. "Three car accident, the last cars brakes failed as they were going down the hill. It rammed into the back of a parked car, that pushed it forward. There was a person walking between the second car and the one in front of it, squishing them." Jack looks at the scene and instantly recognizes your car as the one squished in the middle. Dean does as well and instantly tries to hold Jack back, "Jack you need to calm down." "CALM DOWN! THAT'S MY WIFE AND MY CHILD!" "Hey I get that. But the call says only one person was injured besides the driver." Jack freezes seeing you pop up on the side and start looking at the person stuck between the cars.

Before you realize what's happening you're trapped in two arms, and after a few seconds you realize its Jack from his cologne. You understand immediately what he was thinking and instantly start soothing him, "We're okay. I was inside using the bathroom when it happened okay?" After a few moments Jack's back in action. You get told to stay off to the side because of any fumes that may have been released from the cars. You watch everything happen until the person starts to seize.

You quickly grab a mask and a pair of gloves before climbing over your car and climbing behind the patient. "Y/N get down." "You're pregnant." "That's not safe." "Are any of you a neuro surgeon? This person will continue to seize unless you relieve the pressure in his head, can any of you do burr holes?" When no one answers you continue, "Then I suggest you listen to the pregnant person and get me a drill."

Ben assists you, being the only person with surgical experience, as you do the burr holes. Everyone watches you in amazement as the patient slowly stops to seize as the blood build up is released. You stay behind the person, using your lap as a head rest as they start to move the car off of him. Jack makes you take his jacket when they have to bring out the saw, which gets him scolded at but he could care less, as long as he's keeping you safe. Everyone listens as you talk to the person, keeping him calm. "You two must be married." "What makes you say that?" You laugh when Ben jokes, "Their playful banter?" The guy chuckles as he mindlessly stares at the trees around him, "That's how I was when my wife was pregnant with our first child." You keep the man talking when he sucks in a breath, "How many kids do you have?" "Four. How'd you learn to do that?"

You smile at the man who's referencing to the burr holes you did. "I'm a surgeon at Grey Sloan. Neuro is one of my practices. One of the first things I learned as an intern actually." "Just one of your practices?" You let out a chuckle, "I like working with kids, so I took up pediatrics, then came fetal because why wouldn't a pediatric surgeon know how to fix a baby while it's still in the womb. Then gynecology because I might as well know how to deliver a baby. And finally plastics. Youd be surprised how many kids go through plastic surgery, especially disabled kids." The guy looks at you surprised, the fact that hes literally in a sandwich completely forgotten, "What made you decide to do all that? How'd you manage that?" You chuckle, "Grey Sloan has an amazing program and I jumped at the opportunity. It's sort of what happens when you get told you'd never be able to do something amazing. You prove people wrong and you go above and beyond." "Who told you that?" You let out a chuckle, "An ex actually. My dad wasn't too happy about that one." "What'd he do?" "My mom had to pick him up from jail for smashing every single window on the guys car."

Jack jumps in, "Her moms the one to be scared of though." You let out a laugh as the guy says, "Its always the mom. My wife would murder for our kids." You let out a laugh making the guy smile.

You ride in the ambulance, being one of the only people who'd be able to stabilize the man if he were to start seizing again, and your ride home completely totaled now. When the guy is taken away for surgery Jack bugs Miranda until she agrees to look you over, "Jack I wasnt even in the accident." "You were near it, the fumes and stress cant be good for the baby." Bailey smiles as the two of you go back and forth, "Y/N just lay on the table. You're both stubborn and we'll be here all day if no one stops you two." You give in and lay on the table as she does an ultrasound, the rest of the firehouse watch from the window in amazement as they see the baby on the small screen and they all couldn't be happier that Jack finally got his own family while they also get a niece or nephew, neither of you telling them what you're having just yet.

When the fire station has to leave Miranda is the one who offers to take you home if you're willing to wait for thirty minutes. You make dinner, Jack getting home right on time then you both continue your nights like you usually do. When it's starting to get late you find Jack looking at his laptop, eyebrows furrowed. "What's got you thinking so hard over here?" You come up behind him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and resting your chin on his right shoulder. "Cars? Really?" "We're going to have to replace the one that got totaled today." "Not one with... Military grade metal? Why dont you just look for tanks on sale?" "You think they have room for carseats?" You hit his arm at his joke making him laugh.

You end up going past your due date, so now it's just a waiting game for you both. As Jack is getting ready to go into work, knowing he can't sit still at all, especiallywhen hes so anxious to meet his kid, he finds you in the kitchen hunched over with your eyes closed and face twisted in pain. He immediately starts to rush over but almost slips, he sees the puddle of water on the ground and looks around confused. When he sees the wet spot on your pants it hits him. "When did your water break? We need to get you to the hospital now." You let out a groan when he tries to help you stand up straight, "When you started coming down the stairs."

Jack helps you to the car, before starting to speed his way to the hospital. He calls Sullivan on the way there, "I wont be there today. Y/Ns water broke.... shit. I forgot the hospital bag." You smile in your seat and between breaths say, "It's fine. There's. One in. My locker. Bailey has one. In her. Office. Too."

Jo and Meredith are the ones to see you enter the hospital, both immediately knowing what's happening, "Jo page Carina and get the hospital bag from her locker. I'll take her to the delivery floor."

You're in labor for most of the day, your friends stop by through the day to check on you and give their congratulations. Jack is by your side the whole time, he's a nervous wreck honestly but hes managed to stay calm until you have to start pushing. By dinner time you've welcomed a baby boy, who has very healthy lungs. Your room is filled with balloons from your friends, as you both sit watching the sleeping boy.

Before the night can end you look at the doorway where the firehouse is standing with even more balloons, along with flowers and what smells like stew. "Hey." Dean is the first to push into the room, he quickly hands you the tupperware of stew before turning to his best friend, "Where is my nephew?"

Everyone gives their congratulations as your son is passed around, "What's his name?" Jack immediately says, "Jack jr." You simply roll your eyes and shake your head before looking at the boy who's now in your arms, "Its Jaxon. With an x. Cant let Jack's ego get too big now."

When everyone is gone and it's just your small family in the room you happily lay next to Jack, now able to press your face into his neck without a giant belly in the way. As you're falling asleep you hear Jack say, "Did we really have a baby today?" You smile and kiss his neck, "We became parents today. You became a dad." You chuckle when you hear Jack huff, "That's going to take some time to get used to." "You'll be fine. We have eighteen years to get it right."

[missjackil]

My 15x18 Opinion

`*WARNING: This review is by far more critical of the show, writers, and actors than I have been before. Enter at your own risk*

Despair

Well the name definitely fits! Where do I begin? 

Okay not gonna lie, Im LIVID!! Thsi episode felt like a punch in the gut! I have said many times that the show ending, to me, will feel like someone Ive loved with all my heart for years is dying. Well in a matter of one episode, that changed to it feeling like someone Ive loved with all  my heart for years, is dumping me via text message, telling me he’s banging my sister! It still hurts, it crushes my very soul but for the wrong reasons.

Im gonna hit the big smelly elephant in the room first and ask WTF were they thinking??  Its not bad enough that Cas tells Dean he loves him, which thankfully Dean didnt return (he’s still straight guys!) but it was maybe the worst speech Ive heard on the show! Nothing he said would make anyone happy, so that was bullshit. “You’re the most selfess loving person Ive ever known” Oh yeah Cas? Did you forget Sam? It appears you did. And this is NOT me dumping on Dean at all, Im just gonna state facts. Who has been the most kind, forgiving, loving person TO Cas? Even after Mary died and Dean was blaming Cas (”You’re dead to me!”) Sam was there to say “It wasn’t just Cas” and kept texting him to make sure he was okay. And honestly is Dean MORE selfless than Sam? I dont think so. Sure Dean gave up his childhood for Sam, I’ll give him that, but Sam gave up his adulthood for Dean, and they both gave up life for each other, and the world so, fuck that noise right in the face!

Now lets just rub some rocksalt in that wound and refrain from even giving Sam a meaningful scene with Cas even if he wasnt going to be there when he got Emptied. Jack got one, not Sam though. Thats bullshit!

Also fuck this Sam and Eilleen shit. Im not even confident she’s “gone” because she got sucked away with the others and we know Bobby at least still has another scene, and according to IMDB so does Donna and Charlie. So they may alll just come back. and even if we dont SEE Eileen maybe we just get super happy Sam now that his girlfriend is alive and whats that? Next week they find a DOG???? ARE YOU KIDDING ME????? Wait, thats not all, remember Cas still has some shit with Uriel to do, so dont even count his feathered ass gone yet either! 

The bloody handprint on Dean’s jacket....😣🤢🤮

The story itself this episode was realy bad too, too much back and forth, “is he dead or alive? Is she dying or not? Are we gonna open the God book or what? Did these peope die or just “go away” like Becky? Maybe this will all be answered before we’re done but still it was annoying and messy.

Were there any good parts you ask? Yes, I did like the bro hug. Not WHY we got a bro hug but it was nice and Sam gave a heart felt “be careful” to Dean and I liked Dean’s reasuring touch. I also like that Dean apologized to Sam for last week and as Sam was being all “Dean... you dont need to...” Dean reminded him “I pulled a gun on you” and Sam was looking like “Oh yeah.... theres that” letting us know Sam still felt it. That’s all, the rest sucked balls in the worst way.

The Walker promo airing during this felt weird, like Jared is cheating on SPN... or banging my sister... oh yeah, there’s that analogy again!

Let me say this y’all and then you can agree, disagree, block me, unfollow me, send me Asks or messages if you want, I wont bite, but if this show ends bad I think I’ll be most pissed at Jared, That’s right I said it. Why? Because J2 have been very open and vocal that Jared liked the ending right away but Jensen didnt. If Jared also had problems with the ending, they could have said “nope” and yes, they could have, they’re not simply puppets on a string that have to do whatever TPTB tell them to. They’re the most important part of the entire franchize, no one benefits by pissing them off. So Jensen didnt like the ending and went to Kripke to see what he thought and Kripke said he couldn’t have written a better one, but lets remember that Kripke left with Dean with a girl and a kid, and Sam alone. Are we getting Sam with a girl and a dog, and Dean alone? 

Im supposed to go to convention in July... I dont think I can bring myself to go if the end sucks. I want to be able to tell J2 I miss them, I dont want to be pissed they allowed a shitty ending to happen. 

For the first time I am no longer convinced they’ll have the guys go out together. Either by death or driving off into the sunset. I don’t know what to do with that and Im not Okay.

So on a scale of Bloodlines to Lebanon, I give Despair a 2. Im a little horrified I have to watch it again when my friend comes over to get caught up. 

[desticuleconfessions]

hey desticule. so i have a supernatural-themed girl best friends story that i’ve wanted to share for a long time, especially because none of my irl friends ever rly understood the gravity of this experience w/o the context of spn. there’s a lot of fun parallels to stuff on the show, and its given me like years of brain rot and therapy lmao. so i really deeply appreciate this page as an outlet, thank you so much to the mods for making it. anyways uh. here goes. sorry it’s so long.

[tw: queer trauma, religious trauma, mental illness]

okay so. in 3rd grade i met this girl. we'll call her kate. we became best friends, as in our names were never spoken separately, we did (and won) every science fair together, she came skiing with my family every winter, i stayed with her family at their beach house in the summers, our younger siblings were friends, etc.

our birthdays were exactly 6 months apart (jan 22/jul 22) so we literally believed that we were celestially intertwined.

we wrote a novel together in 8th grade. her family is baptist, we attended massachusetts catholic schools. i would go to church with her family when i slept over, i held hands and said grace with them at meals. they are all tall and blonde and beautiful. classically angelic. i am south asian. i remember introducing her to harry potter in the 4th grade, her mother hadn't let her read em because it was "blasphemous", but i snuck her my copies and she would read them during lunch n recess and keep them in my locker. sorry this seems like a lot of unnecessary detail but it will be important later.

anyways we both got into doctor who and subsequentally supernatural (s1-8?9 at the time). i specifically remember getting her into supernatural. i also remember her instinctive disdain for destiel when i talked about it, i was showing her a meta or fanfic i think, and i talked her through undoing some of her christian household’s internalized homophobia (fully assuming we were both straight at this point) (we were fucking 12). we'd do the whole "bitch" "jerk" thing, i (the older one) affectionately called her 'sammy', her phone password was dean, mine was cas (and they still are). on my 13th birthday, she gifted me a samulet, which i still wear to this day. (additionally, she gave me a vonnegut 'so it goes' necklace one year) (thats not vital but) (goes to show the extent of my dean coding) (im also an aquarius lmao). im highly protective of her. i carry extra rubber bands on my wrist for her. i keep our money and phones in my jacket when the school takes us skiing. i sit next to her in the halls during lunch and organize her binder. on an 8th grade field trip, a boy made a gross comment at her and i broke his nose.

so we start high school together at coed catholic school nearby, i join debate, make a friend also into spn, she's bi. she asks kate out over text. kate's mom sees this. things turn.

now the rest of these things happened over the course of a couple months and due to my trauma memory loss, i have no idea how accurate some of these memories are so uh. don't hold me to them.

- her highly religious mother is not happy with this obviously. at some point, she brings a priest home and tries to have kate exorcised.

- at this point, we learn that kate is schizophrenic; it never seemed to create noticeable issues before bc her home life and childhood was a perfect happy dream (not an assumption, her words).

- she's still coming to school, sporadically now, i bring home her work, spend hours helping her.

- when she comes to school, she has seizures: sometimes we're fortunate enough that they happen in a class we have together. she freezes up and the teacher empties the room. i refuse to leave. i hold her hand and softly sing her favorite song and sometimes she comes back to me. sometimes she doesn’t and the bell rings and the teacher forces me to leave and let the nurse handle it.

- another time they announce a medical lockdown (to keep ppl out of the hallway if someone is being escorted to an ambulance) while im in catholicism class, i immediately know it’s her; she fainted in the pool during swim team practice.

- i stay awake for 6 days straight bc i read online that sleep deprivation induces some of the same symptoms as schizophrenia and if i could understand what she was going through, i could help her

- she shows up at my house w both of her parents 15 minutes before the winter ball, begs me to go bc her parents will only let her if i go. so i do. her mom lurks by the gym doors with the chaperones. during a slow song, kate and debate girl start to slow dance, i grab our friend’s hand, drag him in front of them so her mom can’t see and make out with him.

- i wanted to tell her to stop but i was too afraid i would lose us, that it would seem like i was homophobic or i was jealous, but i knew her in my marrow and it didn’t seem like she was in love or into the relationship, it was willful self destruction

- we talked in the last few years, she confirmed this.

- at some point, she says she’s sorry she didn’t tell me about the voices before.

- when we talk, she’s not her anymore, she doesn’t remember our inside jokes, our codes, i can feel her being slowly ripped away and apart in real time

- i have a vivid memory of arguing with her and her telling me im not real, that her mind made me up, while occasionally speaking to something? someone? else in the room. i hold her hand and point to the matching thin scars on our thumbs and try to convince her im real.

- she eventually drops out entirely, taken to some mental facility that im not entirely sure wasnt conversion therapy (it was definitely a religious facility) (and conversion therapy was not outlawed in new hampshire until 2019) and im not allowed to see her.

- every now and then i get cryptic distressing emails or texts from her.

- one in particular has the subject, “youandiwalkafragilelineihaveknownitallthistimebutineverthoughtidlivetoseeitbreak” which is the first line of the song ‘haunted’ by taylor swift (our shared favorite)(the summer after this happened we collectively decided we needed a new swift Our Song and chose ‘breathe’). the body of the email read “what the hell have i done”

- i pray for the first time in my life, every single day for a few months, in different languages, at temple with my parents, in the chapel at school

- on a club trip, i get a call at 2am from her, crying, asking me why i didn’t help her, why i didn’t stop her, that it was my job to protect her

here’s something i wrote about her, three yrs after:

I wasn’t careful enough and she caught quickly. She burned so close and so bright that for long afterwards, I could not see. And like that, she was gone. I walked into the chapel. Mea culpa. Mea culpa. Mea maxima culpa.

[that last line is from the latin version for a catholic prayer called the act of contrition, it translates to “through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault”]

in the fall, i hear she’s starting at a small baptist school almost an hour from her house. she is dating the principal’s son. the principal is also her pastor.

in my second year of college, i have a bad acid trip in a snowy park in december. i put my hands into the snow and when i look at them,i see blood. i see her body in the snow adorned like it’s a funeral

i still have dreams about her. sometimes i meet her in a grassy field, flying kites and i invite her to my wedding. in others, i catch a glimpse of her ponytail and catholic school skirt and chase her up eight flights of stairs and when i grab her hand, she turns to ash.

at some point in a separate argument w my parents in which they went through my texts and found out i wasn’t straight (amongst other things) my dad says:“i knew i should’ve listened to [kate’s dad] when he told me the things you would talk about. he knew what you are. and he took his daughter away from you.”

last christmas we met up and drove around together, she tells me that for years she thought i hated her for letting me down and for abandoning me, and i literally have the dean winchester in ‘sacrifice’ five stages of grief when sam says “you know what i confessed in there?” because i could not even begin to fathom that she ever blamed herself. it had always been my fault. i had failed to save her. i corrupted her and i failed to save her.

anyways she’s fine now, she’s okay, im okay, we’ve talked and unpacked and we’re alright. but uh. yeah. that happened. the parallels make me crazy. now they can make you crazy too.

‎

[oubliette-od]

Okay...I'm not one to usually cause confrontation but I've had enough. I've seen a lot of negativity here on tumblr and Twitter, a lot of people coming out of the woodwork to give their opinion on something they know very little or nothing about. All these "hot takes" on how queer baity this is or how this is the fastest bury your gays or "oh so they sent him straight to hell for being gay lol typical cw, all you destiel shippers are crazy and are still waiting stupid" "f this show and the horse it rode in on, you people are stupid for feeling joy over this"....like get over yourselves. I get it, the show isnt perfect and kinda sucks sometimes. I completely agree on that. But you treat it like it's the worst show ever and it's really not. It's just easy to pick on because its popular and everyone knows it so to make yourselves feel better you trash on a show that people still get joy from. I was so excited last night until I checked the tags and Twitter and saw so many people being so mean and negative to those of us who were excited and happy this happened.

Like okay so 1. No they didnt kill Cas and send him to ultimate hell for being gay. F off. Hes still alive, he's just trapped in the empty forever (which yeah sounds not great but hes not dead and I know they will do something about this before the show ends.) 2. Dean loves Cas. Anybody who watches the show and isnt a cynical douche can see how much Dean cares for /loves cas. Heck he was supposed to say I love you to him back in season 8 but Jensen had them change it because he thought it wasnt the right time (which I agree with him but kind of wish they left it anyway). People say his reaction was flat but did you watch the scene? All the micro-expressions that swallow, the head tilt the furrowed brows. Dean is already in a bad head space, he was freaking out trying to find a way to save them. Then Cas drops the bomb of his empty deal, bookended by his confession. The poor man didn't have a second to breathe let alone process what was happening. From his reaction on the floor, sobbing, he finally understood what happened and was completely devastated in losing cas again, especially after realizing that Cas does love him back. Just give him time, I dont think he will disappoint in the coming episodes. He wont let this slide, hes going to save Cas and tell him he loves him back. I would be more skeptical if like it was just Cas and a few randos that were gone but its everyone so I believe they are going to bring everyone back, including Cas, Charlie, her girlfriend and Eileen. 3. Its not queerbaiting until the end of the show, and I can't believe they would just leave it like this. I will eat my words if it does happen but you can't tell me with all the evidence shown in previous episodes that Dean is not in love with Cas too. It just doesn't make sense if he isnt. Am I disappointed they waited till now to do it? Sure but I'm still happy they did.

Cas' confession is just the first piece of the puzzle. We still have three hours-ish of show left and a lot can happen within that time. I for one am still hopeful and look forward to where this goes. Yes I get and understand why people are upset and crap on the show. It has some definite issues which most stem from bucklemming being awful writers who unfortunately have written the next episode. Going by the promo, I'm very worried they will screw with the tone and Dean especially. But nothing can erase or take away the fact that Cas confessed to Dean, saved his life once again, left his handprint on THAT shoulder and left Dean a broken man once again. I have faith in the actors and the writers (besides bucklemming I dont trust them at all) when they say they are happy and that the ending is what they wanted to see so I am willing to just wait it out and see how it goes. I never thought we would ever get in show confirmation of destiel but here we are with half of it. And you cant tell me that dean wasnt trying to tell Cas his feelings. He says "Cas, I-" before Cas says goodbye and pushes him away so I feel confident he wanted to tell him something before disappearing forever. The guilt and devastation he must be feeling now, i can only imagine and i for one am very excited to see this play out.

In conclusion, don't spread your negativity and hot takes on something you know nothing or little about. I have seen so many posts from people like "I don't watch the show/never heard of spn/haven't watched in years" going off of what posts they may of seen without much context and I just want to say that yes, you are entitled to your opinions but maybe don't form your opinions on little information that may not be correct or on something you know little about. Like, when you are attacking or jeering at people for being happy or excited about this, maybe you need to step back or at least tag your posts accordingly so they stay out of the main tag.

And no, this is not up for debate and I will not answer any asks about this. You can send all your hate and "you're so delusional" asks to me if you want but it's not going to change my mind. Destiel is canon, confirmed by both Misha and Berens, and that's all I need to know that its true. I am going to stay happy about this and I am able to criticize this show while still enjoying it and that's what I'm going to do through the finale. As the Ghostfacers said, Gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day. Dean will come through and save his angel.

[harleyliloquin88]

Not Strong Enough [Part 2]

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Summary: You loved dean. He was your everything. You follow him anywhere but what happends when the hunter tells you what you always wanted to hear.

Tagged list @holylulusworld @katymacsupernatural @hauntedartqueen @ltsaradharkness @deanwanddamons @donnaintx @sandle44

Warning: tear jerker/ fluffy/ some flirting/ some angst/

Fyi : i gotta carried away plus im not sure if it okay give me so reviews comment reblogg do what you do thanks

Hours had passed since dean left your hotel room sitting on the floor holding yourself. You knew in your heart he wasnt good for you but you didnt care he was the one man who held you when you were scared made you laugh when you needed it.

Tears flowing your heart beating so fast it was ready to pop out. Tears blurrying your vision you cloudnt help it. You were slowly falling asleep soon everything went dark.

Few hours later your eyes slowly started to open. As they opened you wonder what happened. You find your self in a warm bed.

"What the hell" you wonder to yourself. You look over to your left and your mouth opens wide. Its none other then dean laying next to you. You slowly start to move when you miss a step and a loud thud happends. Dean wakes up in a instant and points his gun at you. Seening you stare at him putting the gun and sighs laying back in bed rubbing his hand down his face.

"Hey sweetheart told you i would be back' he says flashing that smile that almost knocks the wind outta you.

"I saw you fell asleep on the floor when i came back so i though i be nice and put you in bed. He says smiling at you.

"I promise i was a good boy" he says winking at you.

You smile at him and returning to the bed. You look up at him as his green apple eyes sparkle.

You knew you wanted him right there and then. He was the man that made you feel dangerous and free. You couldnt resist his smile. Your heart was beating so fast that you could hear the veins in your body moving.

"Soooooo' he says clicking his tounge. You smile at him. Dean moves closer to you. You can feel the heat rise in your body. As he moves inches from you.

'Princess" he says. You close your eye tighly. You remember the name he gave you when you first met. It was a vampire hunt. You were the last survivor of your family. When dean found you all your clothes were soaked in blood. Tears in your eyes. You werent moving just a blank stare. It broke his heart to see you like this. He promised to help you slowly come out of your shell. He moved you into the bunker cleaned you up. Everynight he would talk to you and ask if you were okay all he got was blank stares and nothing. Slowly but surely you came out it.

Dean moves his left hand up to your cheek rubbing his thumb along your swollen lip. Feeling the sensation heat raiditing through your body. Closing your eyes trying your best not to fall for his charm like you did.

"Princess please talk to me" you look him straight in the eyes tears pouring your face. Staring at his lips. You move closer but push him away.

[Y/n) whats wrong" he says looking at you hurt.

'Dean i cant do this with you again i cant" you say tears streaming down your face.

'Do what" he says looking at you.

'We keep playing this game dean and i cant anymore' you say practical yelling at him.

"Princess you knew the deal when i needed someone you would do anything for me" he says getting up and putting his shirt on.

'Well excuse me i am not just someone you can dip and dash dean" you scream at him.

"Well you should have though about that before you came into my bed that one night. He says yelling at you.

"So me being scared that night was an invite to lets be sex partners.

"You know what im leaving you will never change dean" you say grabbing your keys and heading out the door.

Before you make it dean grabs your wrist and pins you to the motel wall. You look up at him to see angry pain sadness in his eye. You try to push him off only to have him push more weight.

'DEAN LET ME GO" you screaming smacking him and hitting him and he just stares and you and holds your grip and looks at you.

"NO' HE says. In a spilt second he went from pinning you to the wall to holding you tight. You werent sure what was going. You can feel the hug getting tighter. In a sense you could feel dean was scared to let go because if he did you disapear. You and dean held eachother close for about 10 mins. You were about to say something when.

Dean pulls you away from the hug looking up you see tears forming in his eyes. He smiles at you. Placing his fore head against yours his breath hitching.

"I cant let you go princess" he says smiling and crying. Moving his hand up your cheek.

"If i let you go baby i dont think i will be able to breath again" he says holding your face in his.

"Princess i know im not the best at these things and i am not even sure what this feels" dean says wiping away your tears.

'Dean" you say.

He walks over to the bed. He sits on the king size bed. Rubbing his nose. Clicking his tounge.

"Princess before i met you nothing made sense. Living this life is not something any one should have. He says shaking his head.

Walking over to him you sit beside him you can see the pain and heartache. It was so hard see ning the man you love so broken bruised and trying to keep it together.

"For the longest time it was sam and me kid. He says looking up at you.

"Then that night when i saw you scared and bloody i promised myself that i wouldnt let anything else happen to you. He says sniffling.

"Dean" you say placing your hand in his as he holds it and places a kiss.

"When you came into my bed that night was when i knew i fell in love with you. He says looking down at the floor.

"I knew i loved you [y/n] but knowing my life style and having you was my weakness" he says

"Baby i couldnt let anything hurt you because if i lost you i knew a part of me would never be whole"

"Princess you are my home and my world you are what drives away the evil. He says smiling at you.

you move closer to him. His face against yours moving his hand up against your face. He smiles at you.

''Is it okay if i kiss you' he says running his thumb along your lip. You nod at him.

Inches away from each other feeling the heat between you both. Soon you feel his lip against yours. You both break apart.

"You still got it baby" he says winking at you.

The end or is it i may turn this into a series not sure yet. But i have more tear jerker angst on its way so look out for that sam cas not sure yet

[chipper9906]

Trip Down Memory Lane

Pairing: Castiel/Dean Winchester

Rating: General Audiences

Word Count: 8376

WARNINGS: Violence, Brief Mentions of Blood

Status: Oneshot- Complete

Summary/Preview: Castiel wasnt sure if he had even wanted to see what Dean's dream life would be. He could guess, of course. Such guesses usually consisted of Dean and Sam out on the road, stuck in a constant loop of driving, investigating, and ganking the monster they'd been tracking. It was what Dean was good at, and it was clear it made him happy.

He had never expected to see Dean living the dream domestic life, white picket fence and all.

And he never, ever, in a million years, expected he'd be a part of it.

* * *

When Dean is poisoned by a Djinn during a hunt, Castiel and Sam are tasked with entering Dean's mind and searching through until they find the dream world the Djinn had placed Dean in.This task requires them to search through some of Dean's memories, and Castiel see's something he never could have expected...

Castiel had been alive for billions of years. In that span of time, he had created countless memories of his time as an Angel, a never-ending storage of moments in his existence. His time with the Winchester brothers is an insignificant amount of time compared to the rest of his life, and yet, he can barely remember a time where the two didn’t need his help in some way or another.

Which was exactly what was happening right now.

"Cas? I-I-I need your help" The youngest brother's voice echoed around his head, the shaky manner in his voice freezing Cas in his movements. "It's... It’s Dean. He's in trouble"

Castiel was by Sam's side before he had even finished the prayer.

"What happened?" Castiel asks the second he lands, startling Sam from his crouched position on the floor.

Castiel senses the dead body off to the side, and for a moment his heart seems to stutter in his chest, thinking that it may have been Dean. To his relief, this proves not to be the case, recognizing the slowly fading magical traces of a Djinn in the room.

"There were two," Sam tells him. "We thought we were only hunting one. The second took us by surprise after we killed the first and had us tied up. I managed to get free and took care of it, but Dean..."

It's then that Castiel sees the body laying on the floor that Sam had been crouched by.

"They got him, Cas. Poisoned him. Dean, he's... This has happened before and he figured it out. Got himself out, I mean. But... He's taking a while this time. I don't know if-"

"If he'll wake up," Castiel finishes grimly, crouching down to Dean's side and placing a hand on the elder Winchester's head. "He's weak. Do you have any idea how long the Djinn has been feeding off of him?"

"I have no idea," Sam answers. "I’d been out of it for a while. I don't know if they wanted to take their time feeding or just...Finish in one feeding."

"I'm inclined to believe it was the latter."

"Can you... Can you heal him?" Sam asks desperately.

"No," Castiel answers somberly, his answer deflating Sam's hope. "But... I might be able to help him out of his state."

"How?"

"I'm going to have to enter Dean's mind, to try and find the hallucinatory dream the Djinn has placed him in. With a little push from the outside... Hopefully, he'll find his own way out."

"You can do that?"

"Yes. But it might take some time, as I'll have to skim through his memories until I find his dream state. It'll be kept hidden away."

"Is there any way I can, you know... Go in there with you?"

Castiel looked slightly taken aback by the request, tilting his head to the side slightly and regarding the youngest brother with narrow eyes and furrowed brows.

"You want to go in there with me?" Castiel asks for clarification.

"Yeah, I do. So that... I don't know, maybe I can help pull him out of it? I just... I can't sit here and do nothing while Dean's trapped in his own mind."

"I can take you with me Sam, but... The experience might be painful. And I don't mean physically. There are some memories you might not want to see, and... I have no way of knowing what Dean's true 'desire' may be, and how that reflects in the dream world the Djinn has created for him."

"I don't care," Sam responds defiantly, "I have to help. I just have to."

"Okay," Castiel relents, giving Sam a respectful nod. "You may want to prepare yourself for this."

Castiel lifts a hand to place his fingers on Sam's forehead, then reaches out with his other hand to gently place it onto Dean's head.

It was as if someone had flicked a light switch. One second, they're kneeling by Dean on a dirty and damp warehouse floor. The next, they're bathed in blackness, with no clue as to where they were.

"Okay..." Sam breathes out uncertainly, spinning around to take in the emptiness around them. "So... How do we find Dean's dream?"

"With trial and error, unfortunately," Castiel tells him, also glancing around at their surroundings. Suddenly, Castiel places a hand outstretched in the air, holding it there for a moment and furrowing his face in concentration.

After a few seconds of nothing happening, Castiel clenches his fist, which begins to shake with the effort. A low rumbling fills the air, and for a moment, Sam expects for the blackness to close in around them, like a collapsing building.

It's not what happens, however. Instead, the blackness in front of them seems to shift in place, one solid color merging into a blurry moment, almost like a shimmer, moving in place and glinting at them from the darkness.

"Come," Castiel instructs Sam, already making his way over to the shimmer. Sam doesn't need to be told twice, obediently following Castiel.

They come to a stop in front of the shimmer, hesitancy coming from the both of them.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Castiel asks Sam once again.

"The more time we hesitate, the less time Dean has," Sam responds, swallowing nervously. "We have to do this."

Castiel nods at this, and then reaches out a hand to touch the shimmer in front of them.

Suddenly, they're both stood inside a cozy-looking hallway of a house, Castiel still with an arm outstretched, shimmer no longer to be seen.

"You think this could be it?" Sam asks Castiel, spinning around to take in their new surroundings.

Before Castiel can answer, a young boy goes speeding past them, not taking in their appearance in the slightest, rushing into a room down the hallway they were stood in with a delighted giggle.

"No. This isn't it." Castiel answers sadly, already preparing to summon the next shimmer.

Sam's about to ask him how he knows when a young blonde-haired woman walks out of the room the boy had come from, an exasperated yet fond look on her face as she chases the young boy down.

Sam's sharp intake of breath distracts Castiel from his task slightly momentarily, sympathizing with the pained look on his face.

"Mom?" Sam calls out, sounding unsure with himself as he watches her disappear into the room.

"She can't hear you," Castiel tells him apologetically. "No one will here. No one but the real Dean"

"Was that... A memory version of Dean?" Sam asks, referring to the little boy that had run past them moments before.

"Yes, it was. I think... I think this was the night that..."

"Get us out of here." Sam quickly demands, already knowing what Castiel was about to imply.

It's as Sam is forced to watch a much younger, much happier looking John Winchester round the corner and approach his family that Castiel manages to summon the next shimmer. It's the last thing he sees before everything blinks out of existence once more.

If he had known the next memory they would fall into, he wouldn't have left the last one quite so soon.

Burning. That was the first thing he noticed. The unbearable heat that surrounded them, no way of escaping from it. Everything was coated in a haze of red, and screams filled with agony echoed from every direction.

One stood out, however. A shrill, piercing scream, coming from right beside them. A woman was laid out on a table, bound down with metal chains that tore into her skin as she pulled against them, desperate to get away from the knife that sliced its way through her body.

Sam found it hard to believe this could be Dean's dream or his memories. Not when the bearer of the knife was Dean himself, cutting into the screaming woman with expert precision.

"Is this-?"

"Hell," Castiel answers for him, an unusually pale color appearing on the angels face. "This was Dean in hell."

Thunder booms from ahead, and the two of them look up the sound at the same time Dean does. The thunder fades away, and for a moment, it seems that nothing else would happen. Then, a ringing sound fills the air, and the screams get louder.

No, not louder. There were more screams.

The screams of countless demons being smited.

Flashes of bright white light appear outside the closed door to the torture room they were in, and all three remain frozen, listening intently as heavy footsteps make their way towards the door,

"This could be-"

Castiel doesn't have enough time to tell Sam what he thinks it is, as the door is flung open before he can finish his sentence.

Well, flung open isn't completely accurate. More, the entire door is blown off its hinges, the two of them ducking way from the shattered metal door whilst Dean remains stoic where he stands, knife still in hand.

Then, stood right in front of them, is Castiel.

"This is when I rescued him from Hell." Castiel finally finishes, watching his memory self stood in the doorway.

Memory Cas's eyes were alight with grace, the reddish light emitting from the room casting the shadows of his wings against the walls.

Memory Castiel strides towards Dean, and it's no surprise that Dean lashes out, striking Memory Cas across the chest with his knife. Of course, it doesn't phase him in the slightest, and Memory Cas flicks his wrist to send the blade flying across the room, regarding Dean with an almost amused expression,

"You have no need to fear me," Memory Cas declares. "I am not here to hurt you. I'm here to free you."

"Yeah?" Dean responds snarkily, a sneer on his face as he looks to Memory Cas. "Well, can't exactly say I believe you."

"Please don't fight this," Memory Castiel asks of him. "It is my mission to recover your soul and place it back in your body. You will need to find your brother, Samuel Winchester-"

"Sammy?" Dean asks, the harsh tone they had heard him speaking in since they had got here reverting to a much softer, innocent-sounding voice.

"Yes, Samuel Winchester." Memory Castiel repeats, sounding somewhat confused. "I will be in contact with you shortly after. Do you understand?"

Dean glances over to the knife that had been thrown across the room, seemingly debating something. Memory Castiel watches him patiently, waiting for his next words.

Dean slowly lifts his gaze back up to Memory Castiel’s. Their eyes meet and, seeing no dishonesty in the angel's eyes, Dean gives a small nod of his head. Memory Castiel gives him a small smile, the corner of his lips barely twitching upwards before he's reaching out a hand and placing it on Dean's shoulder.

"Sam," Castiel calls out, startling Sam from what he was witnessing, looking over to the real Castiel, who had summoned yet another shimmer. "We need to move on."

The next scene they find themselves in appears much calmer. At first, that is. They appear inside an old, beat-up looking wooden barn, it's walls and roof covered in different painted symbols. In the center of it were Dean and Bobby, leaned across a table that had been laid out with various hunting weapons.

"I... Don't recognize this hunt," Sam tells Castiel "Why is Dean on a hunt with Bobby and not me?"

"This wasn't a hunt," Castiel tells him, and Sam is slightly surprised by the tender smile on Castiels face as he looks around at the barn. "Not completely, anyway..."

"You sure you did the ritual right?" Dean asks Bobby, already getting fidgety. Bobby gives him a bitch face in response to this that rivals Sam's, and Dean looks away with a roll of his eyes. "Sorry... Touchy, touchy, huh?"

Mere seconds later, the barn erupts into a cacophony of noise and movement. Loud bangs emit from the roof of the barn, slowly making its way down to the end, the sheets of metal acting as the barn's roof being pushed up and down from the unknown force, adding to the overall noise. Dean and Bobby give each other anxious looks, both of them grabbing shotguns from the table and standing ready, guns aimed down at the barn doors.

"The hell is that?" Sam asks Castiel, looking fearfully between the banging roof and the closed doors.

"I didn't exactly have the most graceful of entrances," Castiel replies sheepishly. "I, uh... Might have missed on the landing..."

The doors to the barn are pushed open, an all too familiar trench coat clad figure making his way into the barn. The second the doors begin to open, the lights above them brighten and shatter, showering Castiel in sparks as he advances towards the two.

"Holy shit..." Sam mutters in awe

The sounds of gunshots fill the air as Bobby and Dean fire their shotguns, each hitting their marks. Memory Cas's trenchcoat is torn apart from the spray of the shells, yet he continues towards them like it wasn't even happening.

It was rare for Sam to see Dean when he was frightened, and this was one of those rare times. As he rightfully should, after watching Castiel take the brunt of those shots without a flinch.

"Who are you?" Dean asks Memory Cas, unconsciously backing away from the imposing figure.

"My name is Castiel," Memory Cas dutifully answers. "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition."

"Yeah?" Dean asks, the sarcasm in his tone eerily similar to the one he had in Hell. "Thanks for that"

Clearly not hearing the sarcasm in Dean's tone, Castiel nods in response to Dean's 'thanks', a slight smile on his face.

Dean charges forward, planting the knife into Cas's chest, clearly aiming to pierce Cas's heart. Sam startles slightly, not expecting for Dean to take action quite so soon.

Of course, Sam knows it won't do anything to Cas. After all, the real Cas was stood right next to him, alive and well. It was still shocking to see though, especially when Castiel looks down at the knife in his chest with the most amused expression he thinks he's ever seen from Cas.

"Not the best of introductions to Dean." Sam jokes to Castiel, watching Bobby attempt to knock Cas out with a crowbar, only to be knocked out himself with just the touch of Castiel’s fingers.

"Maybe but... I won't forget it." Castiel says with a fond smile, shaking his head and turning away from the scene in front of him. "We need to keep moving"

It doesn't take long for Castiel to find the next shimmer, checking over his shoulder that Sam was ready before grabbing hold, throwing the two of them into the next memory.

"Uh... Cas?" Sam calls out to Cas, the hair on the back of his neck standing upright the second they arrive in the new memory. "Where are we?"

"A place almost as bad as Hell," Castiel tells him, hating the familiar feeling that settled in his gut as he looks around at the forest that surrounded them. "This is Dean's time in Purgatory."

"Huh..." Sam breathes out, eyes shifting around their surroundings. "This is Purgatory? Dean, uh... Doesn't talk about it much."

"I don't blame him. This place, its...A place you wish you could forget."

"If this is Dean's memory, then... Where's Dean?" Sam asks, only able to see the endless stretch of trees in front of them, not a person nor monster in sight.

"On his way." Cas tells him, raising an arm to point at something in the distance.

Now that Cas had pointed it out, Sam realized they were near the edge of a river, just about able to hear the gentle rush of the river as it flows past them. And there, crouched by the side of the river, was Cas. A dirty, roughed up, bloody looking Cas, scrubbing away the dirt underneath his fingernails in the river, then trying to wash away the dirt that caked the unkempt beard growing on his face.

"Cas!"

Their attention is drawn away to the yell coming from within the forest, an equally dirty looking Dean erupting from the trees with the vampire, Benny, in tow.

"Dean?" Memory Cas seems to say mostly to himself, almost as if he was struggling to believe that he was really hearing Dean, that he had somehow managed to find him.

"Cas." Dean repeats again, elation clear on his face when it sinks in that he finally found Cas. He laughs openly in relief, not at all taking in the look of dread on Memory Cas's face as he approaches.

Dean still has a huge smile on his face as he yanks Cas towards him into a hug, slapping a hand against Cas's back.

"Damn, its good to see you!" Dean tells him, smile not leaving his face for a second as he raises a hand to brush across the hair growing on Castiels face. "Nice beach fuzz."

"Thank you."

"You should meet somebody," Dean quickly continues, realizing that Castiel had no idea who the person lingering nearby was. "This is Benny. Benny, this is Cas."

"Hola," Benny says in greeting

"How did you find me?" Castiel asks, not in the mood for introductions

"The bloody way," Dean replies, and Castiel needs no further explanation. "You feeling okay?"

"You mean-?" Castiel begins as he raises a finger to his head and making a circle.

"Yeah, if you want to be on the nose about it, sure."

"No. I'm perfectly sane. But, then, ninety-four percent of psychotics think they're perfectly sane, so I guess we'd have to ask ourselves, 'what is sane?'" 

Sam can't help but snort slightly at Cas's response.

"That's a good question," Dean says, looking slightly befuddled by the answer he got.

"Why'd you bail on Dean?" Benny questions, knowing full well that Dean wasn't going to ask himself.

"Dude-" Dean reprimands him, proving Benny right.

"The way I hear it-" Benny continues ignoring Dean. "-You two hit monster land, and hot wings here took off. I figure he owes you some backstory."

"Look, we were surrounded, okay? Some freak jumped Cas. Obviously, he kicked its ass, right?" Dean immediately jumps to Castiels defense.

"No."

Sam hadn't even been there at that time, can't even begin to imagine all the shit Dean had to go through just to get to Cas, and even then, hearing Castiels dejected, ashamed answer pained Sam as much as he knew it had pained Dean.

"What?" Dean asks, hoping he had heard Cas wrong.

"I ran away." Cas admits to him, keeping his eyes on the ground, too ashamed to meet Dean's gaze.

"You ran away?"

"I had to-"

"That's your excuse for leaving me with those gorilla-wolves?"

"Dean-"

"You bailed out and, what, went camping?" Dean interrupts with a demanding tone, nothing but disbelief etched onto his face. "I prayed to you, Cas. Every night."

"I know..."

Now, looking at the real Cas stood next to him, Sam could see the same agonized look of shame that was reflected on Memory Cas's face.

"You know and you didn't...." Dean trails off, and it hurts Sam to see the betrayal on Dean's face. "What the hell’s wrong with you?"

"I am an angel in a land of abominations. There have been things hunting me from the moment we arrived." Castiel attempts to explain himself

"Join the club!" Dean shouts in agitation

"These are not just monsters, Dean. They're Leviathan! I have a price on my head, and I've been trying to stay one step ahead of them, to-" Castiel suddenly stops in his rant, pausing briefly to swallow nervously before he continues. "-To keep them away from you"

Just like that, the rage that had been growing on Dean’s face slips away, softening into a look of realization.

"That's why I ran. Just... leave me, please."

"Sounds like a plan. Let's roll." Benny agrees, sounding happy to leave Cas as soon as possible.

"Hold on, hold on," Dean stops him, looking over to Cas, pleading. "Cas, we're getting out of here. We're going home."

"Dean, I can't-"

"You can. Benny, tell him." Dean says, looking to Benny behind him.

Benny doesn't look all too happy about where this was going, but complies anyway.

"Purgatory has an escape hatch, but I got no idea if it's angel-friendly."

"We'll figure it out," Dean insists, returning his pleading gaze back to Cas in front of him. "Cas, buddy, I need you"

"This isn't it," Real Castiel interrupts, hand already outstretched towards the next shimmer, choosing to look down at the ground in front of Sam, rather than re-live the memory in front of him. "The next ones ready."

This time, he doesn't bother to ask Sam if he's ready, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible. There's nothing Sam can say in response before the memory, and the forests of purgatory, disappears around them.

For a split second, Sam is comforted by the fact that they were now back on Earth. It doesn't last long, as he takes in the dreary, dark room they found themselves in, Memory Dean and Castiel stood in the center of the room, Dean holding what looks almost like a block of cement in his hands

"Oh no..." Castiel mutters in horror, having been dropped into a memory that was somehow even worse than the last.

Sam, meanwhile, was left feeling quite frustrated, constantly being placed into memories he is unable to recognize, at the same time feeling guilty for watching said memories, that he has no right to see.

"I can resupply the prophet, Dean." Memory Castiel insists, stepping closer to Dean.

"You know, why don't, uh, why don't Sam and I take it over to him, and you can get back to your mission?" Dean retaliates, looking slightly nervous at the way Memory Castiel advanced towards him. "Finding the other half of the Demon Tablet. That is priority, isn't it?"

"I can't let you take that, Dean." Castiel informs him sharply

"Can't, or won't?"

"Both."

"What the hell is happening?" Sam asks, the tension in the room starting to make him feel nervous.

"One of my biggest regrets." Castiel answers bitterly, struggling to find the next shimmer to get them the hell out of there.

"How did you get out of Purgatory, Cas?" Memory Dean asks, holding the block closer to himself.

An odd sort of look crosses Memory Cas's face at the question, looking but not seeing at Dean.

"Just tell me how you got out of Purgatory-" Dean continues when Castiel doesn't answer. "-Be honest with me, for the first time since you've been back-" Dean continues, breaking eye contact with Cas to nod down at the block in his hands. "-And this is yours."

Sam wasn't too sure what he had been expecting to see next. More silence from Castiel? Some sort of bleak response?

Either way, the sight of the angel blade sliding out of Memory Cas's sleeve and into his hand is enough for Sam's heart to jump into his throat.

"Cas. Cas, I don't know what the hell is wrong with you, but if you're in there and you can hear me, you don't have to do this." Dean begs, eyes drawn to the blade in Memory Cas's hand.

His pleas go unheard by Memory Cas, who launches forward to strike down at Dean with the blade. Out of reflex, Dean shields himself with the block in his hands, and the clang of metal against the stone echoes in the thunder from outside.

"Cas!"

"Cas, the hell..." Sam mumbles in shock, watching the scene unfold in front of him in despair.

"Cas, fight this! This is not you! Fight it!" Dean yells in desperation, hoping to get through to Cas.

It doesn't work. Memory Cas attacks once again, bringing his blade down hard once more, only to be deflected by the block in Dean's hand.

It seemed almost as if the blow had affected Castiel more than Dean, who stumbled back away from Dean, a pained look crossing his face

"What have you done to me, Naomi?"

"Who's Naomi?!" Dean asks the same time as Sam, as Memory Castiel folds over on himself, panting in apparent exhaustion, fighting something that Dean and Sam can't see.

"It wasn't me..." The real Cas mutters mostly to himself, eyes scrunched closed, refusing to watch the horror he knows is about to occur.

Worried, Memory Dean cautiously approaches Memory Castiel, placing a hand on his shoulder. This proves to be a mistake, as Castiel immediately strikes Dean across the face at the touch, sending Dean sprawling backward.

Memory Castiel makes his way over to Dean, who was unsteadily getting to his feet. Dean tries to defend himself, throwing a punch towards Cas, who quite easily catches it. With a steady grip on Dean's forearm, Castiel twists it harshly, snapping the bone clean in half. Dean yelps out in pain and drops the stone, which shatters into pieces as it makes contact with the hard floor of the crypt.

"The angel tablet..." Sam realizes, not sure whether to look at the violence he was seeing, or the obviously distraught Castiel, who was still trying valiantly to find the next shimmer.

It pains Sam that there's nothing he can do. Nothing but watch as Castiel’s fist meets Dean's face again and again and again, fresh cuts and bruises appearing with every hit, skin being broken from the force of every punch.

"You want it?" Dean asks, noticing Memory Castiel’s attention had changed over to the Angel tablet next to him. "Take it! But you're gonna have to kill me first. Come on, you coward...Do it. Do it!"

Castiel’s attention is brought back to Dean, returning his fist to Dean's face once more.

"Cas... This isn't you. This isn't you." Dean's voice is broken, the intense pain beginning to overtake him. Castiel strikes again, face showing no sign of what he was doing.

"Cas...Cas..." Dean calls out Cas's name in a weak beg, shaky hand reaching out to the angel in front of him. "I know you're in there."

The limited light in the room glints off the angel blade that Memory Cas had raised above Dean, the sight of which made Sam want to look away, to pretend he had never seen what he was seeing.

"I know you can hear me, Cas," Dean's voice breaks slightly, whether from the pain or the emotion of it all, Sam doesn't know. "It's me. We're family... We need you..."

There's no emotion on Memory Cas's face as he looks down at the beaten Dean in front of him, blade hanging just above his head. A stark contrast to the pure agony on the real Castiels face.

"I need you."

"Enough," The Real Castiel declares just as Memory Cas's blade slips out of his hand, clanging against the floor. Sam tears his eyes away to see that Cas had finally found the next shimmer. "I can't..."

"It's okay," Sam comforts the pained looking angel, making his way over to his side. "Come on. Let's go find Dean"

The next place they find themselves in, it's... Well...

It's enough to raise their suspicions immediately.

They had been dropped right in the middle of a fairly ordinary-looking suburban neighbourhood. A beautiful day as far as the weather, deep blue sky with perfectly fluffy white clouds floating lazily past up ahead, no sign in the least of any rain to come.

In front of them stood a two-story house, it's wooden panels painted a light blue that blended nicely with the deeper blue backdrop of the sky. The house was placed in front of an obviously well looked after garden, neat lines mowed into the vibrant green lawn, with various flowers lined against the side, a single bee house tucked away in the corner of the lawn, a few bees buzzing around their man-made home.

And then, sat in the driveway of the home, was a car that Sam would never be able to mistake. The afternoon sun gleamed off the Impalas pristine black paint job, and laid out underneath her was Dean, sweating profusely as he worked on his baby.

"Cas... Do you remember this?" Sam asks, searching around for anything he might recognize.

"No..." Castiel answers, sounding as unsure as Sam did. "Do you?"

"Not one bit. Do you think this could be it?"

"Perhaps. Dean looks the same age he does now, so it seems unlikely that this is an event that occurred before we met... The only possibility I suppose is the time Dean spent while you were in Hell, but... This doesn't look like the house of Lisa Braeden... "

"We found it?" Sam dares to hope, relief clear in his voice.

"I think s-"

"Daddy!"

A young boy with a nest of light brown hair and crystal blue eyes rushes out of the front door of the house, running full sprint towards the Impala. Dean pushes himself out from under the Impala, a huge smile appearing on his face at the sound of the boy's voice.

"Hey, Kiddo," Dean greets him brightly, grunting as the wind is knocked out of him when the boy practically launches himself at Dean. "What'cha doing out here?"

"Can I help you?" The boy asks with puppy dog eyes that Sam swears he's seen before...

"With Baby?" Dean clarifies, looking over his shoulder to the Impala with a raised eyebrow. "Hmmm... I dunno... You think you can be careful with her? She's sensitive."

The boy giggles in delight at Dean's words, nodding his head vigorously in response.

"Come on, Dad..."

"This is... Definitely it..." Sam notes, an odd sort of feeling settling in his chest. "I... I never knew that...This is something that Dean wanted. I always thought..."

"I don't think he always wanted it..." Castiel says, watching Dean interact with his fake son, trying to figure out why seeing them almost seemed to hurt. "He got a taste for this kind of life with Lisa and Ben, and I don't think he's ever really been able to forget it..."

Then, what happens next, Castiel has no explanation or answers for.

"How did you get away when you're under such watchful eyes?" Dean asks his son, smiling at the mischievous giggle he gets in return.

"Because he takes after you just a bit too much."

Out from the open front door steps Castiel. No longer donning his suit and trench coat, now instead clothed in a comfortable pair of jeans and a simple button-down shirt, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed, watching the two with a tender smile.

Castiel wasn't sure if he had even wanted to see what Dean's dream life would be. He could guess, of course. Such guesses usually consisted of Dean and Sam out on the road, stuck in a constant loop of driving, investigating, and ganking the monster they'd been tracking. It was what Dean was good at, and it was clear it made him happy.

He had never expected to see Dean living the dream domestic life, white picket fence and all.

And he never, ever, in a million years, expected he'd be a part of it.

"You're just jealous he likes me more." Dean retaliates, mischievous grin matching the one on the child sat on his lap.

"Stop trying to make our son choose favorites." Cas reprimands jokingly as Dean stands from the floor, lifting the boy in his lap up by his armpits, getting another giggle from the action.

"Because we all know who it is..." Dean whispered, which made Fake Castiel roll his eyes.

"You nearly finished up out here?" Fake Castiel asks Dean, holding out his arms for their son.

"Yep, shouldn't take too long," Dean replies, passing the boy in his arms over to Castiel, who holds him close. "You want me to cook tonight?"

"I think I got it."

"Oh really? That's what you said the last time. You know, when you nearly burnt the house down?"

"I did not nearly burn the house down. The fire alarm did its job, I was alerted to the fire, and it was dealt with."

Dean gave a sarcastic hum in response, reaching for a rag placed in a nearby toolbox to wipe the oil off his hands.

"How about we bake your dad a pie?" Fake Castiel asked the boy in his arms, who squealed in delight at the prospect.

"I wanna make pie!"

"I think that's that, then." Fake Castiel directed towards Dean, smiling smugly in victory.

"You go call your Uncle Sammy from upstairs if you smell smoke," Dean instructs his son, pointing a fake stern finger at him as he speaks. "You got that, James?"

"Can Uncle Sammy help us too?" James asks, tilting his head back to look at Fake Castiel "Please...?"

"Of course he can." Fake Castiel assures him, planting a kiss on Dean's cheek before he makes his way back inside, James still held tight in his arms.

"Go rescue your uncle from all those books!" Dean calls out after them, chuckling lightly to himself as he turns back to continue work on his car.

"Wow..." Sam exclaimed quietly, feeling like he had become winded all of a sudden. "This is...Something..."

Noticing Castiel’s silence, Sam glances worriedly over to him. Castiel’s eyes were trained on Dean, watching him live his fake life with a look of sadness and regret.

"Cas?" Sam calls for him softly, not wanting to startle him. "You alright buddy?"

"I never knew..." Castiel mumbled, shaking his head slowly "I... I had no idea..."

"I get what you mean," Sam emphasized, able to see the shadows of Fake Castiel and his son move around the inside of the house. "I can't believe that in all of this, Dean included me."

"What?" Castiel asks sharply, snapping out of his trance to look at Sam incredulously. "Sam, you were the only person I was sure I would see in Dean's dream."

"Look, me and Dean, we...We don't always see eye to eye with certain things. We don't always tell each other everything there is to know, and this? This is one of those things. I mean, I don't exactly fit into this kind of life that Dean... Wants?"

"We don't have time to talk about this right now," Castiel breaks the brewing discussion, moving his gaze back over to Dean. "We need to get Dean out of here."

Deans hunting instincts are as keen as ever, lifting his head from under the Impalas hood the second he makes out their approaching footsteps, spinning around to see the newcomers, posture relaxing once he realizes who it is.

"Hey hon," Dean greets Castiel with a warm smile, eyes shifting from Castiel to Sam. "James managed to drag you away, huh?"

"Um...." Sam began awkwardly, looking to Castiel for help. "Not exactly..."

The happy smile on Deans face faltered slightly, a more bewildered look crossing his face once he studies Castiel closer.

"Didn't even realize you still had that thing," Dean noted, raising a hand briefly to point at the trenchcoat Castiel was wearing. "And how did you get changed so fast into it anyway?"

"Dean..." Castiel began gently, dreading what was to come.

"Wait, where's James?" Dean suddenly seemed to realize his son was not with them, looking panicked and worried by the realization. "Wasn't he with you?"

"Dean, I need you to listen to me," Castiel instructed sternly, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "This is going to be difficult for you to hear, but you have to remember."

"Remember what?"

"Dean, none of this is real," Castiel decided the best approach was to 'rip the bandaid off', metaphorically speaking. "You and Sam were hunting a Djinn up in Washington. Something went wrong."

"There were two, not the one like we thought," Sam adds in, cautiously moving closer to his brother. "We had no idea. He snuck up on us after we dealt with the other. Do you... Do you remember that part?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You were captured, Dean. Both you and Sam. Sam managed to get away, but... The Djinn poisoned you, Dean. All of this, it isn't real. It's what your mind fabricated for you."

"Djinn," Dean breathes out in disbelief, glancing over to his house behind him, thinking over something in his mind before looking back to the two of them.

"What... What if it is real?" Dean stuttered out. "How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"I'm sorry," Castiel apologized genuinely, recognizing just how happy Dean had been in his dream world. "I really am, Dean."

"I hate what I'm about to say-" Sam interjects, forcing Dean to break eye contact with Castiel to look over at this younger brother. "-But think about it. When are we ever going to get to live this kind of life? C'mon Dean, escaping the hunters’ life, it... It just doesn't happen. Not for us."

"Dean, you're in a bad state. That Djinn drained you, and it might not be long before you fade completely, especially trapped here." Castiel informs him.

"But..." Dean tried to argue, unconsciously trying to move towards the house. "My... My son, I can't... I can't just leave him."

"You won't be leaving him." Castiel consoled Dean. "He was never there. Simply a vision created in your mind. You're not leaving anyone, Dean. The people who will miss you, those that are real? We're out there, Dean. If you don't get yourself out of this, it'll be us you're leaving."

Castiel could see the fight drain out of Dean, shoulders slumping, his whole posture shrinking down. Without another word, Dean slinks over to the back of the Impala, lifting up the boot.

"Dean, I-"

It's all Sam can get out before Dean pulls out his pistol from the back of the Impala, not an inch of hesitation as he lifts the gun to his head and pulling the trigger, throwing all three into a startling blackness with a loud bang.

Sam blearily opens his eyes, sluggishly turning his head to see Castiel slowly coming to himself, shaking his head in an attempt to shake out the remaining grogginess.

It felt as if they had been reliving the memories for hours, but from the looks of it, barely a minute had passed. The warehouse they had been in looked as dark and dreary as ever, and worst of all, Dean still laid unconscious on the floor.

"Dean?" Castiel calls out worriedly, sluggishly pushing himself onto his knees and leaning over Dean's form, placing a hand over his shoulder and giving him a light shake.

With dramatic timing only Dean could master, he shoots upwards with a gasp, startling Cas who quickly leans away to avoid being hit by Dean's sudden awakening.

"Oh, Thank Christ..." Sam mutters appreciatively, standing on shaky legs and stumbling over to Dean.

"You alright man?" Sam asks him as he holds out a hand to Dean.

"I've been better." Dean responds truthfully, spending a few seconds with his eyes closed, sat on the dirty floor as he waits for the spinning to stop before eventually grabbing onto Sam's hand, who yanks him up to his feet.

Castiel looks like he doesn't know what to say, and frankly, neither does Sam. Judging by the look on Dean's face, he'd much rather go with this never being mentioned for as long as he lived, but it was a discussion that was inevitable not to occur.

For now though, it wasn't what mattered.

"C'mon, bud," Sam says gently, slapping a hand on Dean's back. "Let's get you home."

* * *

Thankfully for Dean, Sam and Castiel were too busy being mother hens over his health the first few days to bring up what they had witnessed in the innermost hidden parts of his mind. A few days of bed rest were enough to get him back on his feet, and then, it became an avoiding game.

Any time he saw Castiel coming down the hallway or entering the room, he would simply do a one-eighty and escape the situation as soon as possible. He didn't even know if Cas was actually trying to speak to him about it, but Dean wasn't taking any chances. Not when it came to this.

Really, he should have known that trying to ghost an angel of the Lord wasn't going to work forever. Castiel had been respectful of his wishes the past few days, but clearly, something had snapped and he had had enough.

Which is why one early Thursday morning, as he snuck into the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee, relieved to see its only occupant was an exhausted-looking Sam, Castiel had teleported behind him, tapping his fingers against Dean's head the second he had jumped and turned, teleporting them both away before Dean can get a word in edgewise, leaving a poor, bewildered leaving Sam at the kitchen table.

Dean felt the usual sickening pull of the world around him which usually accompanied angel flight, then the ground came back into existence under his feet. Castiel didn't say a word once they landed, dropping his hand away and taking a few steps back, keeping his eyes locked on Dean at all times.

"Cas, where the hell-" Dean begins to ask, trailing off as he takes in the familiar building Cas had dropped them into. "Wait a minute, is this...?"

"Where we first met," Castiel clarifies, joining Dean in scanning the dilapidated barn. "The first time you remembered, anyway. At least, that's what I thought..."

"The first time I remembered? What are you talking about?"

Castiel sighed softly, wandering over to a table that had been pushed up against the wall, its wood rotting and weak from the torrential downpours of rain that had slipped through the panels of the barns room. Castiel gently traces a hand across its surface, pushing down firmly to check its weight before hoisting himself up and taking a seat.

"Do you know how a Djinn crafts its victim's fantasies?"

Dean immediately tenses up the question, while knowing that the conversation would eventually lead to this, was still not prepared for it.

"Not really."

"The Djinn mostly relies on its victim's memories in order to do so. It's essential that the victim believes in the dream that's been created for them, to keep them placated right up until their death. Using the victim's memories means that Djinn's poison can get every necessary detail correct. Without those memories, it's not possible."

"What are you getting at, Cas?"

"Getting you out of that world wasn't as simple as 'jumping right into your dream,'" Castiel explained, making quotation marks with his fingers as he speaks. "Sam and I had to delve through your memories in order to find you."

"Oh..."

"I had to try and find a common detail in your most active memories. That is, where there was the most activity in your brain."

"...Coz those memories are being used to make the dream, right?"

"Correct. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure out... Mostly because I... I never thought it was possible."

"Never thought what was possible?"

"The first memory was simple enough. A tragic night, yes, but that wasn't the focus of the memory. It was of a happy family, nothing more. The others though... I just didn't understand it. In all of them, you... You were in pain. You were hurt, or you were scared, I just couldn't grasp why they were the memories you chose."

"Cas, buddy, at the moment, you have a better understanding of my head than I do."

"No, I don't, Dean. If anything, I've never been more unsure. Each and every one of those memories, the link was right there, but I could never see it... Me."

"Cas..."

"Me, rescuing you from hell. A memory that, I thought had been lost to you. Me, introducing myself to you and Bobby, in this very barn. Me, running from you in purgatory. Me... Nearly beating you to an inch of your life. All of that, right there in front of me, and yet... I still did not anticipate that in your dream world, I would be there. Not just there, but..."

"Don’t say it..." Dean whispers, eyes clenched shut and shaking his head. "Please, don't..."

"You might be fine pretending this never happened Dean, but I'm not," Castiel snapped, pushing himself off the table and storming towards Dean. "I get that you're a secretive man, Dean. That you don't like talking about how you feel-"

"So then you know why-"

"Not for this. Never for this," Castiel disputed, deflecting Dean's attempt at an explanation. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why didn't I tell you?" Dean gawfed, throwing his hands up in the air in exasperation. "Gee, I don't know, Cas? Maybe because I couldn't come to terms with it myself? Maybe because if I told you such a fucking batshit thing, you might tuck tail and run, and I'd lose my closest friend?"

"I would never leave you," Castiel asserted, taking a step closer to Dean to drive home his statement. "You know I wouldn't. Not after all we've been through."

"What would I say, Cas?" Dean asks, words dripping with sarcasm. "'Oh, hey Cas! Just thought I'd let you know that things have been different lately, and I've been thinking of you as more than a friend. As in, I can't get you out of my damn mind, and there's jack-shit I can do about it, other than sit here and think about what it would be like if my life wasn't so fucked up. You know, the kind of vision where we're just two normal fucking people, living in a normal fucking house with a kid of our own, and that above all else, we're happy.' 

But no, why should I tell you that? Why should I bother, when I know that this is the life I live, and there's nothing I can do to change that! When I know that even in the damn slim chance that you see me as anything but a friend, that I could ever settle down into a life where-"

Dean isn't able to finish his rant, as Castiel interrupts it by grabbing a fistful of Dean's flannel shirt, twisting his hands into the soft material around the collar. Dean's words trailed off into a stutter, briefly wondering whether Castiel was about to strike him in an attempt to shut him up.

Which is, perhaps why, the reason his whole body freezes up when instead, Castiel yanks him closer, coming dangerously close to clashing their teeth together in his haste to feel Dean's lips against his own. His shocked gasp is muffled by Castiels mouth on his own, and his brain seems to have stuttered to a stop, unable to comprehend what had just happened.

Castiel’s lips move against his own, an invite to actually participate in the kiss he had initiated. The movement at least helps prove to his shell shocked brain that yes, this actually was happening and that he should probably do more than just act like a dead body in this situation.

Dean decides the best course of action was to shut down his brain for the moment. No more questions, no more doubts. It was just himself and Castiel, and that's all he had to focus on right now. It does the trick, as he feels himself sink into Castiel’s hold, every wound up muscle he didn't realize he had practically melting against Cas's touch.

A deafening clap of thunder rings from outside, accompanied by a bright flash of white lightning. It doesn't take long after that for them to hear raindrops hitting hard against the beaten-up metal roof of the barn, the torrential rain pouring through the gaps and doing quick work of soaking the two.

Dean pulls away from Castiel with a weak laugh, shaking his damp hair of the rain and glancing up to Castiel with a dopey smile.

"This you?" He asks Cas, pointing up to the storm that seemed to appear from nowhere.

"I thought it would add to the atmosphere." Castiel jokes with a deadpan expression, though it quickly breaks when Dean cracks up into laughter, shaking his head fondly before pulling Castiel closer to him, burrowing his face into Castiels shoulder and wrapping his arms tight around the angels back.

"Dean, you know I would love nothing more than to give you that life," Castiel tells him as he raises his own arms up to envelop Dean in a hug. "Even if I wasn't a part of it, I want to see you live your life without hunting, without all that fear and responsibilities."

"I don't think you're getting the main part of it, Cas. You said it yourself, my brain was relying on memories of you. It wouldn't be my dream life if you weren't in it, Cas."

"Dean, I... I might not be able to give you a home, or a son of your own. But... If this, if us is something you really want, then I will spend the rest of my life doing what I can to make you happy, Dean."

"I don't need all that stuff to make me happy Cas. The bunker is my home now, and as long as it’s got you and Sammy in it? I'm happy."

The rain continued to pour down on them, the flimsy roof of the barn proving next to no cover from the storm Castiel had created out of thin air. Dean pulled away from Castiel’s embrace slightly to peer up at the roof, wincing as the droplets of water fall into his eyes.

"Uh, Cas? We should probably be heading back now..."

"Right, of course, I almost forgot you can feel the cold..."

"That and, you know, Sams probably gonna think you tried to drown me in a lake once we get back..."