#I LOVE STEPDAD JAMES | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

weirdgenetic-fuckup · 2 months ago

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PLEASE MAKE THE JAMES KIDS Y/N's OF

A/n: I've had this idea for so long NO ONE RUIN IT

Warnings: Smut, fingering (f receiving), praise kink, age gap, daddy kink, James is reader's stepdad (reader is of age and did not grow up with James as a father figure, he's just some guy), forbidden love?, angst, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

He looks so soft and squishy but also like he could crush me

I would thank him and apologize for being crushable

James had started seeing a woman around his age, things were going great and they were planning on moving in together, but things were a little more complicated than that.

She had a kid when she was young, you, obviously. You were an adult but you still lived with her because you can and housing is expensive.

James didn't have an issue with it, he'd met you a few times and you were quite quiet, young and you didn't really have much to talk about with him, but you were always nice. He did want a relationship with you.

He didn't expect you to call him dad or even see him as a father figure, but he wanted something.

After getting you and your mom moved in he tried to figure out your schedule. He knew you had some kind of job but he didn't know what it was exactly and he didn't ask much, he figured if you wanted to talk about it you would.

After a couple weeks of not seeing you not leaving your room that much, never once catching you outside the house, he decided to take you out with him. Just to band practice, nothing big but it was something.

Until you sat on the floor in the corner with your headphones on reading. James was hoping you'd be interested in the band, you weren't disrespectful and greeted them all, but you just sat there. Because you weren't actively being rude James felt bad for being frustrated with you, but he couldn't help it, he was doing everything he could and you just weren't even trying.

He knew you didn't owe him anything and that if you didn't want the relationship he did he couldn't force it from you, but it hurt. You were living in his home, you were an adult but he was trying to be your dad, at least be someone who you could trust.

James went over to you and pulled your headphones off. You looked up at him and held your page with your thumb, quickly pausing your music for a second. "You don't wanna listen to us?" James asked, a forced smile on his face as he tried to come off as cheery, not as annoyed as he was.

You looked to the band and shrugged. "I'm fine right here." You said, pulling your headphones back on. James stared down at you, arms crossed over his chest.

"She's fine, isn't she?" Kirk spoke, wanting to keep the peace, and Lars was getting antsy.

"Yeah, she is, but..." James grumbled, looking back at you. He huffed and took your headphones, not giving you a chance to argue before he was pulling you out of the room and down the hall to find an empty spot.

"What the hell?!" You asked when he finally stopped and let go of you.

James stared at you a moment before he let out a sigh. "I'm sorry, are you hurt?" He asked, looking over your arm a moment before you shook your head in response. "I didn't mean to get mad, I'm just- I'm trying, I'm really, really trying here, and I know you don't owe me anything, but I'm just asking to give me a chance." He explained, giving you pleading eyes.

You stared right back at him, thinking over what he was saying. "I wasn't trying to be mean." You said. "I just didn't want to leave the house... you keep trying to spend time with me but you don't do things I like."

James took in your words, understanding what you were talking about. He did do that, he always got you going to band practice and hikes, when you seemed happier staying in the car. "Alright... what do you want to do right now?" He asked, shoving his hands into his pockets.

You thought for a moment before holding your hand out, expecting money. "There's a DQ across the street." He let out a small laugh at that and pulled his wallet out, only giving you about fifty bucks which was still way more than you needed for DQ.

"And you're gonna stay there until I come get you?" He asked, watching for your nod before handing you the cash. You walked back with him to the studio, getting your headphones and book before heading to the restaurant.

James still thought of you, he was still sad you didn't want to do the things he wanted to do but he knew you were happy now.

When practice came to its end and Lars cheered, James went across the street and found you with your face in your book, dunking fries into a shake and popping it into your mouth. "What is wrong with you?" James teased when you took your headphones off, he hadn't wanted to rip them off this time so he sat in front of you and waited for you to notice him.

"Try it." You offered, pushing the fries towards him. He gave you a skeptical look but took a fry nonetheless.

He chewed it after dipping it, expression morphing from disgust to pleasantly surprised. "It just tastes like a cold fry." He said before taking another. You swatted at his hand and he dropped it. "Hey, I paid for them."

"And you could pay for more, my fries." You stated, pulling them back out of is reach. James rolled his eyes at you and went to get his own food, he hadn't eaten in a while and needed something. Once he got his food you were gone to his truck and back home.

It was already late, around five, and it was a long ride home because James lived rather far on the country side. You took your headphones off, listening to whatever he had on the radio -Iron Maiden and Judas Priest, seventies bands- while you read. Occasionally James would give you a nudge and you'd give him a fry from his basket, maybe a chicken strip.

"You don't do much, do you?" James asked, stealing a glance at you.

You raised a brow at him. "What do you mean?"

He shrugged. "Just, like, anytime I see you in your room you're on your phone or laptop... you don't really leave the house."

You look at him as he spoke and turned your head away afterwards, returning his shrug. "I do stuff... I read a lot."

"How do you even afford books? I don't give you money for them, I know your mom doesn't give you money for them." He said, trying to figure it out in his head. "You stealing?" He asked, giving you a stern look as he pulled into the driveway. "If you're stealing I'll have to spank you." He said it jokingly but it didn't stop your thighs from pressing together, or around the food between them.

"I have a job, I'm not stealing." You said before getting your things together and getting out of his truck, hurriedly making your way inside the house.

James laughed to himself as you ran and started getting out of the truck himself before he stopped himself. Your book was sitting in the door still.

He grabbed it and went around the truck to get his things before making his way inside. He dropped his things off and looked at your book, looking it over and reading what it was about. Some kind of smut, it didn't say anything but it was evident and it gave him a giggle.

James knocked on your door and leaned closer to it. "Hey, you left your book." He said, waiting a moment before calling out again. He did it a third time before trying the door and finding it unlocked.

He pushed the door open, the first thing that caught his eye was the camera sitting on the ground. Why you never brought it with you on hikes he didn't understand, it was good quality and could take some beautiful pictures. Then he followed where the camera was pointed.

You were frozen on the ground, staring up at him with wide eyes like a deer caught in headlights. You wore pretty lingerie but that didn't distract him from the purple, tentacle like dildo suctioned to the ground and halfway inside you.

James stared right back at you with the same stunned expression. Slowly, he set the book down on your shelf and left, leaving you alone for all of about five seconds before he swung the door open again. "What the hell are you doing?!" He yelled, making you flinch. "Is this your work?" He asked, gesturing over your body.

You bit your lip, awkwardly covering yourself. "Y-yes..?" You said after a moment. "I-I like what I do." James scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"You like what you do, selling yourself to creepy old men?" He asked, looking back at you. He glanced at your bookshelf. "You read smut, get horny, and then do this?" He glared bullets through you for a moment, going over everything that happened that day.

"I don't read smut." You said. "I read romance, some of them have smut but I don't read for it, I just like romance." You explained, wanting to get off the dildo but not knowing how to do it discreetly or... it was just weird no matter how you think of it, really.

James took in your words, still staring at you. His brows raised as he came to a realization. "You were getting off to me?" He asked hesitantly. Your face lighting up was all the information he needed.

The two of you stayed staring at each other for a long time before a grin spread over his face. "Poor girl, just needed daddy's cock, huh?" He asked, moving closer to you and kneeling in front of you, his cock twitching in his jeans. He cupped your face in his hand, running his thumb over your cheek. "Why don't you show me how bad you want it, huh?" He asked, leaning down and kissing your forehead.

You couldn't say how many times you'd gotten off to him, how you pictured his cock instead of those fucking silicone things, how you heard his voice in your mind, cried out for him. You needed him so fucking bad, but he went for your mom instead.

You started bouncing on the purple tentacle, it was only about five inches. You were still relatively new to this field and didn't have many toys, the ones you had were smaller. The bigger ones scared you but always tempted you, you wondered how big James was and got ones around what you thought.

James started palming himself through his jeans, tattooing his zipper into his cock as he watched you, watched your brows furrow and lips part in soft moans. "C'mon, sweetheart, don't be scared, it's just us here, you can be as loud as you want." He assured, tilting your head up for him.

You lifted yourself up and dropped your weight on the dildo, a high moan ripping from you as it bumped your gummy walls. A low groan left James as well, his gaze now on your pussy, watching it suck in the toy, your puffy little clit poking out all needy and neglected.

"C'mere, sweetheart, let daddy show you what to do." He said, hands going to your shoulders and guiding you off the toy. He turned you around and pulled you into his lap, back flush against his chest while his thick arms wrapped around you.

One hand went to your chest, needing your tits, the other went to your glistening cunt, thick fingers easily sliding through your folds. "You know how to touch yourself?" He asked, chin resting on your shoulder.

"I-I do." You said, breathlessly, reaching a hand down.

James caught your wrist and pulled it behind your back. "I don't want you to do it, just wanted to know what you knew." He explained, hand finding your clit and starting to rub it in slow circles. "Feels good, right?" You gave a small nod, soft moans starting to leave you. "That's good, daddy's gotta make sure you're enjoying this, doesn't he?" Again you nodded.

He kissed along your neck and shoulders, not stopping his little ministrations as he continued to ask you questions. "Do you make good money?" "Do you ever get any threats? Bad fans?" He asked you questions about how it worked, what you posted and how much money you made for what kind of content.

You were so close to cumming and he wasn't stopping, but he kept telling you to wait. "Just one more question, last one, I promise." He'd said about five times, you were getting really close to disobeying and taking whatever punishment he gave you, and boy did you expect a good punishment. "How'd you get into it?" He asked. "You said you liked it."

You swallowed thickly, mind a muddled mess as you did your best to hold back on your high. Your mom would be coming home soon and she couldn't find James in here with you doing this. "Just-just got into it, I-I posted pictures online and-and people really liked 'em." You managed to babble out through moans and heavy breaths.

"That's it?" He asked. "No one made you? There was no necessity for it?" While it seemed insignificant he needed to know you were actually ok and enjoying it. He finally seemed satisfied when you nodded this time and kissed your cheek. Just an inch over and he'd get your lips where he'd been avoiding. "Go on and cum for me, would you?" He said.

You didn't wait another second, finally getting to let go. Your eyes rolled back and you slid slightly on the hardwood floors before he caught you and held you tighter, praising you through your high. "What a good girl, such a good listener, waited for daddy to give you permission." He cooed.

He gave you a minute to stop twitching before he lifted you up and carried you to your bed. There were wetwipes on your nightstand and he used those to wipe you down. He felt bad as he did it, did you always use those? Never had anyone to hold you after? No one to tell you how good you did, tell you they loved you? Nothing?

He sat on the edge of the bed, the mattress dipping under his weight as he looked over your nearly asleep form. He let out a heavy sigh and leaned down, brushing your hair out of your face to kiss your forehead. He was just about to give in and lay with you but then he heard the door open and his girlfriend called for him.

He looked back to you, your fluttering eyes and heaving chest, barely awake, and he just left you. Alone in bed, all over again. Naked. Without him.

#metalica #metallica #metallica smut #metallica imagines #metallica rp #metallica fanfiction #metallica x reader #james hetfield smut #james hetfield x reader #james hetfield fanfiction #james hetfield #james hetfield x you #james hetfield fluff #james hetfield angst #metallica angst

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hollowed-theory-hall · 5 months ago

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Love the posts on Harry’s mischaracterisation!! It’s soo soothing to come across Harry appreciation!

How infuriating is it that everything he does, particularly his successful defeat of Voldemort, hinges on Hermione’s guidance. Fic writers out here writing smack like without her, the trio would’ve been lost and aimless. Or how Hermione’s spell repertoire kept Harry alive throughout school. Uhm, ex-bloody-cuse me? And then some fics go to the extremes of even making Harry a pliable weakling who can’t think for himself or make him apologise for coming off as self-righteous and prejudiced against the racist party? 🙄

Honestly, it’s seems less like terrible reading comprehension and more of extreme bias for their fav character, who is definitely so not Harry, and some blatant dislike of him instead. You never see the titular character so severely undervalued and made fun of in other series smh.

Thank you so much! 😊

Harry is my favorite and I can't get how people can dislike him so much after reading the books.

Now, I don't want to put down Hermione. Her spell repertoire and tendency to plan ahead did save their lives multiple times. Ron, also, had his share of clever heroic moments and he got to save the trio's lives too. And so did Harry. All three of them are smart, talented, and capable wizards in their own right. Like, the entire Golden Trio are not average and it's shown to be so repeatedly.

But, Harry is special. He is the main character and the chosen one for a reason. While Ron and Hermione are smart and talented, they don't have Harry's sheer magical talent that's on par with characters like Voldemort and Dumbledore.

Honestly, I find the weak-willed passive Harry more offensive than the unintelligent or magically inept one. Harry is so smart, but one of the most defining aspects of his character is his iron will and strength of character. It's a big aspect of what makes him special. what makes him the main hero. I mean, there's a reason he can naturally resist the Imperius. Harry James Potter is so strong. He goes through so much and is such a good person anyway. He's willing to stand up and keep fighting against impossible odds, and honestly, book!Harry is an inspirational character. There's a lot you can learn from him and aspire to (not everything, but his resilience is truly something to behold).

That being said, I don't think this is unique to Harry Potter (Ron bashing which often mischaracterizes him, for example) or the HP fandom as a whole.

I used to be a huge Percy Jackson fan (I kinda hate everything past the Last Olympian, HOO was not to my liking at all, but I digress). And from what I remember in fics and the PJO fandom when I was there (I think it's worse now, from the bits I see on occasion), it had just as much of a problem as the Harry Potter fandom does. Fanon often portrayed Percy as stupid, or this kind of sunshine character, when he really isn't. Fans complained back when House of Hades came out that Percy was OOC for chocking a goddess with her own blood, and I was sitting there, like, this is the guy that turned his abusive stepdad to stone with Medusa's head when he was 12 — are we really talking about the same character?

Percy in the first 5 books was clever, witty, genuinely funny, but also really bitter. He had loads of spite in him but he also genuinely cared about people and was incredibly loyal to his loved ones. The fandom, just turned him into a happy-go-lucky funny guy who can't get out of a paper bag without Annabeth (the smart love interest). And it infuriated me there too because I liked canon Percy.

I was also, a huge Gravity Falls fan (still am, actually, even if I'm not as hyper-fixated as I was in 2015). When I was in high school, I was in the Gravity Falls cipher-breaking trenches. I was analyzing that show frame by frame and spoiled all the plot twists to my irl friends because I saw the clues (such as predicting who's the author and the stan twins situation after s1 ep19). I actually predicted a good chunk of what's written in the Book of Bill that came out this year with the Bill Cipher psychological analysis I wrote when I was 15. (I feel so vindicated about that. I sent a bunch of quotes from the book to those same irl friends who thought I was overthinking Bill and the finale captioned: "I told you so").

Point is, the main characters of Gravity Falls (Dipper and Mabel) got so mischaracterized by fandom and fics back in the day.

Dipper was often pigeonholed as a goody-two-shoes awkward smart-guy nerd and fans complained he was OOC when he acted more vindictive in season 2, when, in fact, Dipper was always vindictive and could hold a mean grudge. (Dipper Pines, s1 ep8: "Revenge is underrated, that felt awesome!"). Dipper isn't a typical smart-guy character, yes, he's nerdy and clever and socially awkward, but he's also incredibly brave and determined. Honestly, Dipper's determination is his most defining trait, not his intelligence or intellect (which is sometimes more preformative, s2 ep7: "Sometimes I use big words and I don't actually know what they mean, I mean, I'm supposed to be the smart guy"), but I digress.

Mabel was the fandom's punching back around the finale of season 2 and the fandom treated her like a selfish horrible person for acting like a twelve-year-old girl who loves her brother. They made her out to be some kind of awful monstrous person when Mabel is one of the sweetest characters in media ever. She makes mistakes, she is a little selfish at times, but she truly cares about being a good person, about doing good and making people's lives better. Hell her worst confession was her feeling guilty about not loving all her stuffed animals equally and the fandom still called her evil. She also owns up to her mistakes, which is more than many people can say.

So, really, this disdain for the main characters and mischaracterization of them isn't new or unique to the HP fandom. I think it's been part of literature analysis since human literature existed if I'm being honest. It just feels worse now because everyone with an opinion has an internet connection and social media amplifies a lot of bad takes (but also a lot of good takes!). But, yeah, this is a prevalent fandom thing, but it isn't just the HP fandom.

As I said many times before, write and read whatever fanon content you feel like, have fun, but canon exists, and sometimes, canon is better.

#sorry I went off about other fandoms but this is something that annoyed me in literally every fandom I stepped foot in #harry potter #hp #hp meta #asks #anonymous #hollowedrambling #gravity falls #mabel pines #dipper pines #pjo #percy jackson #i guess #about fandom tendency in general #fandom #fanon

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my-castles-crumbling · 2 months ago

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hi cas im back with another shower thought!!

(jegulus dads au)

so when harry came home with a crush reg really really thought it would be hermione. he adored hermione and thought she was intelligent, lovely, and kept harry in line. he was disappointed to find that hermione chose someone like ron (but he sort of loved it too cause it reminded him of james and himself)

james, on the other hand, thought it was ginny. he thought she was kind and fucking amazing at quidditch and perfect for harry in every way

when it wasn’t either they were thoroughly surprised but also not that surprised

wait but was it draco? Tell me it was draco

Also I kinda wanna write this...like in a way where harry isn't related to draco, like reg is his stepdad or something

#asks #ask #ask cas

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ghost-bison · 4 months ago

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a christopher eccleston appreciation post

i will never say this enough because i don't know enough words, nor do i think such words exist, that could even begin to summarize how much i love christopher eccleston, but... i love christopher eccleston. and, more importantly, i have a deep-rooted respect for that man.

i started doctor who as, let's be honest, a sci-fi hater, forcing myself because i was obsessed with david tennant, and i was kind of dreading the first series because of this. but i was dead wrong.

he broadened my mind, gave me so many laughs, and so many cries, and i'm not the first to say that whenever eccleston is on the screen you just can't take your eyes off him, even when he's not supposed to be the main focus of the scene.

the way he can switch from silly goose to traumatized soldier in a matter of seconds will never cease to amaze me. or how he can play with both like he's on a swing by balancing it out with sarcasm?

i think whoever doesn't give him the title role in their shows/films is either an idiot, or they know the main character just isn't always the best.

i think it's downright idiotic and shameful that he gets rejected from ever playing some shakespeare just because of his northern accent (they're just posh elitist pos). now that he's older, and that times are evolving (i mean, i hope the world of theater is vibing with this evolution, but i'm not delusional), i hope we get to see him portray a character like leontes in winter's tale cause i know he'd be absolutely perfect for the role, and who better than shakespeare (this character especially, with his nuances and highs and lows and breakdowns and breakthroughs) to match acting like his?

saw an article where eccleston talked about how the moment he really knew he wanted to be an actor was when he had to wear mascara for a play, and had enjoyed it. i think he talks about it in his autobiography too (you should read it, btw, it's frankly affordable, and he happens to be a marvelous writer as well).

eccleston knows he is mistakenly type-cast, because of his background, as macho men and tough blokes in general. he's aware that it's kind of a big part of his culture. again, he talks about it i think in the very first chapter, how for instance he used to dress up as james bond, the pinnacle of "masculinity", which i think was a disguise in the metaphorical sense of the term, to mask his delicacy and femininity (or at least, that's my interpretation of it).

in his biography, eccleston talks about the differences between him and his dad, ronnie: he was surprised, as a child, whenever his father's affection manifested as a kiss or a hug, cause that usually wasn't his father's way of doing things. he compares it to how he, in contrast, has the habit of kissing his own son, albert, and telling him he loves him.

you can find it as well in how he talks about his anorexia, his body dysmorphia and, i think we can call it that, gender dysphoria. he's from a time when those concepts didn't even exist, they weren't a thing to the public eye. my father and my step-father, both feminine men in their own way, and both around eccleston's age, both told me about the struggle that it represented, not being the stereotype of the macho tough guy, and being surrounded by boys who didn't struggle with that issue. it made my dad a junkie, my stepdad a depressive artist, and, apparently, it made eccleston an anorexic actor.

i think it takes a lot of courage for people that age (the boomer generation as we call them), especially men, from whom we expect toxic masculinity, masculinity pushed to an extreme, to be able to openly call it out and dissect it into what it is: a ridiculous standard. but to be a PUBLIC FIGURE, in his 60s, and still find the strength to express it? damn. takes guts, i think.

most of us on this website, we're babies. most of us are at most in their thirties. the millenials and the gen z, and now the gen alpha, we take that for granted. or get offended and scandalized that being able to express oneself isn't yet a basic standard.

but then, i talk to my mum, and i realize that she had to stray from her catholic, sexist education, she had to make up her own mind about things in order for me to be born a free spirit. and that's just considering my mum's a cishet.

christopher eccleston expressed in other words that he doesn't fully consider himself to be cisgendered. i have mad respect for the way he talks about it, and for even talking about it at all.

then, there's his honesty. the more interviews i watch, the more it impresses me. he knows honesty goes hand in hand with dignity. i'm sorry but i'm tired of people who are nice all the time. you never know when they're being honest, and maybe some of them are, who knows. but i'm not stupid enough to think that so many people are just pure sunshine all the time (respect for tennant for lashing out publically about transphobia, i think he passed the test).

eccleston? he knows how to be both brutally honest and yet respectful at the same time. no ukulele apology from this man and holy fuck, it feels good!

i've seen him call russel t davies out for his lack of professionalism on the set of doctor who, and then list him amongst the great writers he's worked with. which makes me want to believe eccleston's side, because, if you're always either too polite, or too full of spite about eveything, who's to say you're not the problem? i've got way less trouble believing you if you can stay unbiased about a person you're having beef with than if suddenly everything said person does turns into shit just cause you don't like them. that's just maturity and wisdom.

one last thing i love about eccleston is that he is interested in other people's lives. there's a critic by marcus berkmann in his book that perfectly expresses my point: "you know what to expect from the autobiographies of most actors, i think: anecdotes, charm, more than mild self-satisfaction and faux-modesty by the bucketload. but christopher eccleston is not most actors".

and that's it. watch him in interviews and at convention panels, where he lets his younger co-stars speak before himself, and seizes the occasion when journalists ask him questions that are meant to make him talk about himself to praise his writers and other actors instead.

read his autobiography, which is both a love letter to his dad and a big let's-be-honest about the struggles of growing up poor and his personal struggles, because he thinks raising awareness is just as important as protecting himself.

look at his instagram posts where he unabashedly disses the monarchy and stays true and loyal to his background even after getting a taste of money. and his other posts where he shares his love for acorns and spending time with his kids.

i've seen him nearly break down in shame and regret on television for having stolen a kid's crisps in primary school. and not trying to find lame excuses for his behaviour. no ukulele apology, just facts, just christopher eccleston showing us what masculinity in its purest, most beautiful form should be about

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fandomnerd9602 · 1 year ago

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First Kiss

Stepsister!Wanda x Reader (Teen AU)

High school. It’s rough for you. On the downside, you have to deal with grades, social circles and the constant reminder of the crushing loneliness that first love creates. But on the bright side, you got an amazing stepdad Django Maximoff, and a cute and quirky stepsister Wanda Maximoff.

It was just after home room. You were feeling happy as could be. Your plan was to ask out Carol Danvers, Captain of the school’s volleyball team. You had practiced in the mirror and even asked Django for advice. He was more than happy to oblige.

You walked to your second period class with a pep in your step. You sat next to her and you seemed to have a good vibe between you and her. And then you turned the corner and stopped dead in your tracks.

Carol was standing there she was kissing James ‘Rhodey’ Rhodes and then she turned and kissed Valkyrie.

“Bye babes” she said with a wink. Your heart shattered. Luckily she didn’t notice you. Or maybe it was unlucky. You didn’t know. Your head was spinning.

“Y/N!” Wanda called out to you with a smile. She didn’t quite grasp what was wrong with you. She gave you a gentle shake. “You okay?”

“I-I don’t know” you just walked into class and sat down wordlessly next to Carol. And for the first time, you didn’t care.

The rest of the school day was a blur. You went from school to your own bedroom in an almost zombie like state. You felt absolutely alone and helpless. Your high school crush had a girlfriend…and a boyfriend.

You just curled up on your bed and just buried your head in your pillow in sheer embarrassment. You felt as embarrassed as the numerous times that you found yourself staring just a little too long at your step sister. In truth, Wanda was the one you truly loved.

Her kindness, her humor, her beauty, everything about her drove you crazy with love. But she was your step sister. You had hoped that if you focused on another girl your age, maybe you’d somehow focus your affections on her rather than Wanda.

But even that didn’t work because the only other girl you liked was part of a throuple.

You just buried your head in your pillow and grunted in embarrassment. And then came a soft knock at your door.

“Go away” you mumbled. “Nursing a broken heart in here”

“You sound like a dying moose” Wanda spoke up from behind the door. You couldn’t help but smile.

Wanda entered a second later with a cup of tea for you. “You okay, Y/N?”

“I don’t know if you saw it but Carol…she’s uhh…”

“I saw that…” Wanda huffed, “she can’t really make up her mind. Just pick one and be faithful”

“I’m never gonna find love” you mumbled before taking a sip.

“I’m sure Pietro would tell you the same.” She giggled.

“How’s your mom and Pietro doing?” You inquired.

“Malibu’s fine for them. I miss my bratok tho” she sighed. “But I know Pietro would love hanging out with you.”

“Life’s weird, Wanda.” You stated Esther pitifully. “I haven’t had my first kiss yet”

“Neither have I” she smirked, “although few have tried. No one can conquer the witch!”

Wanda throws her hands in the air and faked conjuring up some kind of magic. You couldn’t help but laugh. And then she laughed along with you. It just felt right being there with her.

You stared at her. She stared at you. A small blush made its way across her face.

“Y-you know,” she gently moved a stray strand of hair away from her face, “what if we…oh forget it”

“What?”

“What if we were..each other’s first kiss?” She found herself trying to hide her embarrassed face.

“Really?” You asked.

“Y-yeah. I want my first kiss to be with someone I trust. And I trust you” she explained.

“O-okay” you managed to say. Your heart was beating out of your chest.

The two of you just looked at each other for a split second before you broke the silence, “do you want me to lean in or-?”

“I-I’ll lean in” Wanda chimed in. She let out a nervous giggle before she leaned in.

You found yourself leaning in and then it happened. Your lips touched hers. So soft. So tender. The faint scent of strawberries permeated her skin. You could feel a sense of warmth and love take over your entire body.

Wanda pulled back. How you just wanted to take a hold of her and kiss her again. You could kiss her countless times and you sweared it would never be enough.

“That was…” she blushed, “wow”

“Y-yeah” you giggled. “T-thank you”

“What are step siblings for?” She smiled and turned to leave. “I’ll see you for dinner”

And with that she turned and left. You collapsed against your bed in an absolute state of bliss.

Years later your now wife Wanda told you that she did the exact same thing too.

Tags: @lifespectator @ma1egamer @aloneodi @holiday-house-of-m @family-house-of-m @konstantin609 @revanshand @russianredassassin @scarletquake-n7 @supercorpdanbeau @pinklawyerwinnerzonk @jacenradio7

#marvel #marvel imagine #marvel fluff #mcu #mcu imagine #mcu fandom #marvel incorrect quotes #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff imagine #step sister #step siblings #stepsister Wanda #scarlet witch #high school #high school au

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hlficlibrary · 8 months ago

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Remember to leave kudos and a comment on the fics you enjoyed to show your appreciation! You can find the library's other recs here.

🍊 Own the Scars by @crinkle-eyed-boo {E, 144k}

“But I don’t belong here,” Louis insists.“Why do you say that?” James asks.“These people are all drug addicts and alcoholics,” Louis shrugs.Something sparks in James’ eyes.“And you’re not?”

Louis has never felt like he was good enough: for his stepdad, for his life-long best friend, for the life he's supposed to want. After an accident that nearly costs him his life, Louis' parents send him to rehab where he’s forced to face his demons. On the long and difficult road to recovery, Louis must confront the truths he’s been avoiding about his future, his relationships, and his sense of self-worth. Because before he can love anyone else, he’s got to learn how to love himself first.

🍊 California Sold by @isthatyoularry {M, 123k}

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

🍊 I'll Fly Away by @juliusschmidt {E, 122k}

Harry and Louis grew up together in Lake County, Harry with his mom and stepdad in a tiny cottage on Edward’s Lake and Louis in his family’s farmhouse a few minutes down the road. But after high school, Louis stuck around and Harry did not; Harry went to Chicago where he found a boyfriend and couple of college degrees. Six years later, Harry ends up back in Edwardsville for the summer and he and Louis fall into old patterns and discover new ones.

ft. One Direction, the local boyband; Horan’s Bar and Grill; families, most especially children and babies; Officer Liam Payne; many local festivals and fireworks displays; and Anne Cox, PFLAG President.

🍊 Heading for Limbo by @kingsofeverything {E, 100k}

Childhood best friends who’ve fallen in and out of touch with each other since Louis’ family moved away when they were thirteen, Harry and Louis find their paths crossing again and again. Each time, no matter how many miles apart or how many years it’s been, it’s as if no time has passed. They fall back into their easy friendship, until life intervenes and sends them on their separate ways once more.

When Harry discovers some life-changing things about himself, Louis is there for him, however he needs. But it’s all temporary because Louis has plans that will move his life from New York all the way to L.A. and the distance isn’t the only thing between them.

The pieces of their twice broken hearts are scattered from the Atlantic to the Pacific.

🍊 When the Lights Go Out by thelarenttrap / @antidotetogo {E, 79k}

“Louis, what do you have to say about how last week ended?” the reporter asks. There’s a moment of silence. Harry is looking at the reporter, but eventually gives in and looks down the table at Louis. He’s looking straight ahead, as if Harry isn’t even in the room. “If you can’t take the heat, then get out of the kitchen.” Harry leans forwards, placing his arms on the table and leaning onto them to get as close to his microphone as he can while looking at Louis. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” Louis turns to him, his icy blue eyes meeting Harry's. “Driving is your fuckin’ job, act like it.”

In its near eighty years of existence, Formula 1 has never had an out gay driver. In 2017, Harry Styles signs a contract with Scuderia AlphaTauri alongside his childhood friend and competitor, Louis Tomlinson. The next decade of their careers is some of the most tumultuous press--on and off the track--Formula 1 has ever seen.

aka the one where Louis and Harry are childhood friends to enemies to lovers over the course of 15 ish years.

🍊 Bottom of the Tenth (series) by kikikryslee / @flamboyantommo {M, 60k}

As Harry stood there, the other man turned around, and he knew he was correct in who he thought it was. “Louis?” he asked, still not quite believing it. Louis blinked. “Harry? Wh– what are you doing here?” “I work here,” Harry said. “What are you doing here?” “Um, I’m picking up my brother. The nurse called and said he was sick.” Harry felt like he was going to be sick. “Wait, Ernest is your brother? Since when do you have a brother?” “Since about seven years ago, I guess. Wait, how do you know Ernest?” “I’m his teacher.” “You’re his what?” Louis exclaimed. Harry gulped. This was going to be a long year.

Or, the AU where Louis and Harry were best friends growing up, but lost touch after Harry moved away. Ten years later, Harry has moved back to town, but he and Louis don't pick up where they left off.

🍊 Never Let Me Go by loveisalaserquest17 {E, 55k}

“Harry! I’ll tell you what,” Louis exclaims, clapping his hands together. There’s a big grin on his face. “If both of us are still single by your thirtieth birthday, we’ll marry each other.”Harry’s head snaps up, eyes widening. “What?”

Harry and Louis have been friends forever, but they couldn't be more different. One night, with a little too much alcohol, they make a pact to marry in ten years if they're both still single. Now, one month before the deadline, Louis is willing to do whatever it takes to avoid ending up with his best friend. But is he, really? | Loosely inspired by The 10 Year Plan

🍊 Faking It by TheCellarDoor / @donotdialnine {M, 46k}

A uni AU in which Louis has been Harry’s best friend since he offered him cubed fruit on the playground, and they spend more time cuddling in their dorm beds than they do apart, but it’s not like that. Or is it?

Aka Harry pretends to date his best friend to escape unwanted attention from a too insistent classmate and hopes it won’t blow up in his face. Featuring embarrassing dildo accidents, awkward boners, longing, first times, late night conversations, emotional discoveries and Niall as the exasperated friend with bad advice.

🍊 it always leads to you (in my hometown) by @insightfulinsomniac {E, 40k}

Doncaster hasn’t changed much since Harry left it nine years ago to chase his dreams in LA. Harry, on the other hand, has changed a lot.

Except for one thing — he’s still desperately in love with his childhood best friend and first boyfriend, Louis Tomlinson. Who he hasn’t spoken to for the same nine long years.

A holiday story of returning home — not just to a place, but also to a person. ‘tis the damn season and This Love inspired AU.

🍊 Canyon Moon by delsicle / @eeveedel {E, 40k}

For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.

Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind.

An A/B/O Lion King AU

🍊 Snow In Love by @lululawrence {NR, 33k}

Harry and Louis are best friends and have been for basically as long as they can remember. For the first time since middle school, they are both single for the holidays leaving them with the brilliant idea to take each other as their dates to work events. To make things easier they will pretend like they’re dating. But then they learn something funny.

People thought they were already dating. Weird.

An advent fic featuring childhood friends, fake dating turned actual dating, really horrible secret keeping, and a winter weather surprise.

🍊 Oh, We're In Love, Aren't We? by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings {M, 30k}

After sixteen wonderful years of friendship, it's hard to imagine any grand (and usually dumb) plans they haven't had or some type of mischief they haven't gotten into together. But, when Harry suddenly finds himself without a fiance and Louis just wants to help him feel okay again, they realize falling in love is one thing they haven't done, and that's about to change.

🍊 Forever Never Comes by Larry_you_know / @larryyouknow {M, 25k}

Victorian au, where Harry Styles, the youngest son of the Duke of Sutherland, was always a little in love with his childhood friend Louis Tomlinson, the young Earl of Doncaster, though he would never have told him in a million years. Especially since Louis never showed him any signs of romantic affection. But now Louis has invited him (and his sister Gemma) to London, and many things may not be as they have seemed.

🍊 I Wanna Be More Than Friends by @2tiedships2 {NR, 20k}

He hadn't meant to scent Harry. They were best friends and that was it. Scenting best friends wasn't exactly socially acceptable.

"Lou," Harry whispered.

Louis jumped at his name and sat up straighter to provide a bit of distance between himself and Harry.

"You can't scent me, Lou," Harry stated.

Which of course Louis couldn't scent him. They were best friends.

"I mean," Harry continued. "I wouldn't mind exactly, but if I can't scent you, I don't think you should scent me."

"What do you mean you can't scent me? I mean, I get it because we're best friends but..."

"I mean I can't smell you, Louis. I fucking can't smell you. I can't smell anything, okay?"

Or the one where Harry’s an alpha with no sense of smell, Louis’ an omega who isn’t allowed to scent his best friend, and that’s all they’ll ever be. Obviously.

🍊 threadbare by kiwikero / @icanhazzalou {M, 20k}

Harry Styles was eight years old when Louis Tomlinson kept him from falling into a machine in a Manchester textile mill.

He was 18 years old when nothing, not even the threat of death, could keep Harry from falling in love with Louis.

🍊 Restless Lane by @jaerie {E, 14k}

Louis had grown used to his boring life back in Mississippi as a stand-in father figure to his siblings. He never expected his childhood friend to show up on his lawn with the heat of summer or that he would remind Louis how much of himself he'd tucked away and neglected. He also never expected to find himself caught up in a tangled web of feelings or secrets that just might break him. Maybe he had never known Harry at all.

🍊 you and I love like it's a secret by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed {T, 4k}

Louis swallows, looking at Harry, who grins at him as though nothing’s wrong. He’s leaning against the door of a wardrobe, his long hair having lost some of its curls due to the amount of times he’s run his fingers through it. Louis is still where he was the moment the door got closed behind them, all but pressed up against the wood, trying to keep as much distance between him and Harry as possible.

His heart stutters in his chest as he looks up at his best friend. He’s known Harry since he was barely out of diapers, and Harry gets him in a way that few people ever have – or have tried to. He knows him, to the point where sometimes Louis worries that he’s able to read his mind.

Or: It's Seven minutes in Heaven, but Louis sort of feels like he's ended up in Hell instead when he's forced into a small bedroom with his childhood best friend slash long time crush.

🍊 All The Way Home I'll Be Warm by @justanothershadeofblue {T, 2k}

Harry & Louis jokingly send out holiday cards together as friends, and now everyone is congratulating them for finally getting together. A 5+1 fic, for Christmas.

🍊 What’s in a Name by @hellolovers13 {T, 2k}

Louis had always known Harry was his soulmate.

The name on his arm disagreed.

But what did his soulmark know about true love anyway.

🍊 captivity by momentofclarity / @gaycousinlarry {G, 1k}

you get to a point in life when your secrets aren't as holy as they once were.

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keyboardsmashess · 1 month ago

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The Siren, or The Heart of the Matter

Chapter Twenty Six: The File, or Secrets, Sparring, and Escapes

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC

Warnings: language, eventual smut, fluff, angst, canon-typical violence, implied abuse MINORS DNI. A/N: Hello, lovelies! CW for heavily implied abuse in this chapter, so please read with care. I'm never going to explicitly state what Cleo went through in her childhood, and that's for a reason that's very important to me. I'm not here to write trauma porn (for lack of a better phrase) - I'm here to write a story about two people figuring out how to live with the things they've been through. We don't need to know exactly what happened to Cleo to be able to understand that story, we just need to know she's been through something major. I don't want the details to become the focus, so you can fill in the blanks in whatever way makes most sense to you. As always, thanks for reading, commenting, liking, following, reblogging, etc. - I love you all <3

Summary: Cleo's secrets are finally revealed, leaving her and Bucky to deal with the fallout.

Chapter Directory

I’m packing for the overnight trip to Culver (since we leave in a few days) when there’s a knock on my door. I’d told Bucky to come keep me company while I packed - he’s been finishing the Harry Potter books and sometimes, when I’m convincing enough, he’ll read them aloud to me - so I head to my door with a grin thinking it’s him.

When I open it, he’s standing there. Next to Nat. I smile, trying not to look surprised or disappointed. “Hey, guys, what’s up?”

Nat’s mouth is a harsh line. “Can we come in?”

“Absolutely.” As they enter, I can’t help myself. “Who died?”

She chuckles, but it’s a humorless sound. “Nobody, yet. I’ve got the info you asked for on your stepdad.”

I nod, blood running cold. “Oh, okay, then.” My voice comes out quiet, small. I sit at the kitchen table and gesture for them to join me. Nat sits directly across from me, laying out a few file folders, and Bucky takes the seat directly to my right.

“Cleo,” she starts, and from the way she says my name alone - nothing but pity and discomfort - I know that she knows.

“Is he The Philosopher?” I interrupt, forcing my face into a mask of indifference.

“No,” Bucky replies. “He’s not.”

“You’re sure?”

“We’re positive,” Nat says, and I nod firmly.

“Alright then, thanks for doing all that research even though it was a waste of time.” I stand, folding my arms, and pace by the table. “Go team. Should we get some dinner? I’ve been craving bao buns and Tony says -”

Nat moves to stand, to come toward me, but Bucky shakes his head softly, keeping her in her seat. “Cleo,” he says, and hearing that same pity and discomfort from him - in James’ voice - pushes me over the edge.

I turn my back to the table so they can’t see the tears rolling down my cheeks. “I could go for tacos if you’re not in the mood for bao,” I say, cursing the warble in my voice.

“It’s the middle of the afternoon, Cleo,” Natasha says softly.

I laugh, a tinge of hysteria to it, and wipe my tears before turning to face them. “It’s always taco time somewhere, Nat.”

I studiously avoid Bucky’s gaze, knowing it will set me off again, looking instead at Nat. At the woman who has, quite quickly, become one of my closest friends. Her face is hard, almost as if she’s holding back her own well of emotions, and it helps me keep mine from bubbling up.

She flicks her gaze between Bucky and I, hearing the unspoken as per usual, and stands. “I gotta run, but I’m going to leave these here,” she says, patting the files, “just in case you need them. Cleo, if you need… Well, you know where to find me if you want to.” She moves past me for the door, but pauses just as she reaches it, turning and giving me a hug so quick I’d believe she has superspeed. Before I can even hug her back, Nat is gone.

I sigh and sit, avoiding Bucky’s eyes. “We really don’t have to talk about this,” I say, picking at a fingernail.

He scoots his chair back so he can face me and reaches across the table for the files Nat left behind. “That’s completely up to you, just as soon as I say what I need to say about these files.” His voice is soft and kind and wonderful, and I don’t know if I love it or despise it.

I nod, still looking at my fingers.

“We may not have found anything that ties him to HYDRA, but we found enough to… Well, we know what kind of man he is, now, and these files contain enough evidence to send him to prison. Nat and I talked about it, and -”

I cut him off with a dark, humorless laugh. “Oh great, you guys talked about it. I love that you two are just casually chatting about the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Bucky’s voice doesn’t lose an ounce of softness. “Cleo, you know that’s not what I meant.”

I slam my hands on the table hard enough to sting my palms and stand, turning my back to Bucky once more. “I don’t know that, actually. What I do know is that I explicitly asked you both to only focus on Robert’s life before my mom and I, to avoid anything to do with me, and you both agreed. Now you’ve got files and evidence and you’re saying my name with all this fucking pity, so obviously you went behind my back and did it anyway.”

He stands and puts an arm on my shoulder. “Cleo, I get that you don’t want to go there, and that’s fine. Just let me tell you about the files and I’ll -”

I whip my shoulder from his grasp and turn to face him, eyes blazing and brimming with unshed tears. “You’ll what - you’ll just know this massive thing about my life, now? You’ll never be able to look me in the eye again? I didn’t want you to find any of this because I knew it would change everything. It always does.”

Bucky’s face is pleading. “Cleo, this changes nothing, except now I know you’re even tougher than I thought before.”

I roll my eyes. “Yeah, I’m a brave little soldier. So inspiring how I just took off after everything - just ran away. I don’t need your sympathy and I don’t need unearned admiration.”

His mouth becomes a firm line. “Alright then, come with me.”

I shake my head. “I don’t want to go anywhere right now - not with you or anyone else.”

He takes my hand - gentle but firm - and pulls me toward the door. “You said you didn’t want sympathy? That’s fine. I’ll give you something else.”

I frown deeply. Maybe I’m simply too tired to fight, because I allow him to lead me out of my apartment and through the hallways and stairwells to the gym. He holds the door open for me and gestures for me to enter. “What are we doing here, James?”

He walks over to the mats and grabs hand wraps from a basket, throwing a set toward me. Wordlessly, but never taking his eyes off mine, Bucky wraps his hands. I sigh, but follow suit and wrap my own.

When I’ve finished, he takes a sparring stance. “Come on.”

I fold my arms. “What, you want me to hit you? You think this will fix everything?”

Bucky shakes his head. “No, but I do think it’ll show you that I’m tellin’ the truth when I say things aren’t any different between us.” His Brooklyn accent seems stronger, sharper in the heat of his emotion.

I shrug, mirroring him, and we circle each other for a few moments. “Have it your way, I guess.” The look on his face is so sincere that I almost feel guilty for sweeping my leg toward his feet, aiming to knock him to the ground. He may be distracted, but his instincts are next-level and he simply jumps to avoid the kick.

I give a frustrated huff, and we continue circling. “It wasn’t your place to go digging into my life.”

He’s clearly not going to make any moves here, so I get more aggressive, aiming an uppercut at his jaw. He dodges it effortlessly.

“Maybe not, but Cleo - what he did wasn’t right. Someone should’ve known a long time ago. And I’m not gonna apologize for caring about you - about what happened to you.”

I freeze, shocked at his words, and he takes advantage of my surprise to bring his arm around, gently tapping the side of my head with his fist. “Hit,” he says.

I roll my eyes. “That’s exactly what I mean - now that you know, you only see what happened to me. You only care about what happened to me.”

I feint with an arm to one side and land a kick to his solar plexus with my opposite leg, significantly less gentle than his tap. It doesn’t phase him at all, but my foot kind of smarts.

He shakes his head. “Stop puttin’ words in my mouth - that’s not what I meant and you know it.”

He repeats the leg-sweeping maneuver I tried earlier, but he’s so fast it’s successful. He reaches down a hand to help me, but I slap his hand away and get up on my own. I glare at him, shoving his chest. He backs up a few paces, eyes wide. “I’m pulling from experience, so don’t act like I should believe you won’t be different now, because I can’t know that. I can’t trust that. You have no idea what it’s like to -”

Bucky cuts me off, eyes narrowing. I can see a flush rising in his cheeks. “To what, Cleo? To walk around with this mountain of shame on my shoulders - shame that ain’t even mine to feel in the first place? To be stared at like I’m a goddamn charity case, some broken fuckin’ toy?” He throws his arms wide, hands spread. “To have someone take control of my body and my mind and force me to do things that’ll haunt me for the rest of my life?”

Bucky’s chest heaves as he breathes hard, and I pale instantly. “Shit, James, I’m sorry. I -” I reach a hand in his direction, but can’t let myself touch him. Not yet.

He shakes his head and scratches the back of his neck. “No, it’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have gone off like that.” He sighs. “I’m just tryin’ to say that even though we lived through different shit, I can understand at least part of what you’re going through. And you can trust that I won’t look at you any different, because to me you’re always gonna just be Cleo, the woman I -” He cuts himself off, running a hand roughly down his face. “My friend.”

I nod, swallowing thickly. “Okay.” I meet his eyes for the first time since he entered my apartment, and what I find there feels like home.

He nods back. “Okay.”

“Okay.” My voice is no louder than a whisper as I step closer to him, narrowing the space between us to just a few inches, sparring long since forgotten. “What did you and Nat talk about?”

Bucky sighs deeply. It sounds like relief. It sounds like refuge. “We figure there are three options, and it’s up to you to pick one.” I nod, and he continues. “Option one, we burn those files and never talk about any of this ever again.”

“Option one sounds good.” He cuts me a look, but there’s no heat in it. I smile softly, biting my lip. “Sorry, go on.”

“Option two, the cops in your hometown come into work one day to find they’ve been given an anonymous tip, they arrest Robert, and he goes to prison - ideally forever.” I hum in thought, and he continues. “And option three, we burn the files and… we take matters into our own hands.”

My eyebrows knit together in confusion. “What does that mean?”

He gives me a duh, Cleo look. “Nat and I both know how to make people disappear without a trace. So we do that, and maybe it hurts real bad in the process.”

I sigh deeply, rubbing at my face. “I used to dream about option three. Literally - I would have dreams about it.” Bucky looks like he understands me completely. “But I don’t know if that’s what I want anymore. To be honest, I don’t know what I want.”

He reaches out and takes my hand in his, my skin tingling at the contact. “We both figured you’d want some time to think about it - take as much as you want. And for what it’s worth, Nat’s not gonna treat you any different, either.”

I give him a sad smile. “I hope you’re right.” I exhale a shaky breath, wiping at the corner of my eye. “Is it crazy that - that I’m disappointed Robert isn’t The Philosopher?”

Bucky smiles crookedly, obviously trying to brighten my mood. “Cleo, we established a long time ago that you’re plenty crazy. But no, I don’t think that particular thought is.”

I can’t help but smile back, but it’s watery and temporary. “I just think it… it would’ve been easier, if he was part of some giant evil organization. Maybe everything he did would make more sense, then.”

Bucky studies me, really processing what I’ve said before responding. “I definitely get what you mean, but I also don’t think somethin’ like that ever makes sense.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I think I wanted him to be this supremely evil villain, and instead he’s just some guy who did some really shitty things. It’s harder to put just some guy in a box, y’know?”

Bucky smiles sadly. “I’ve run into a lot of supremely evil villains in my extended life. Hell, I was one for a while - albeit against my will. And the thing about ‘em is that underneath it all, under the masks and the secret organizations and the big plans, every one of ‘em is just some guy.”

I nod thoughtfully, and he continues, moving his hand from my arm to my shoulder and squeezing gently, comfortingly. “Doesn’t make what they did any less evil, of course. But I think if we try to put ‘em all in a box like that, we run the risk of forgetting that they’re just people, and that people do pretty evil stuff sometimes. I think forgetting that dulls the impact a bit, and that’s not fair to the people they hurt.”

I stare at him, at his clear blue eyes and strong jaw and kind, kind face. “You’re pretty smart, you know that, Barnes?”

He chuckles. “Smart, old, potato, tomato.”

I laugh and grasp the forearm of the hand he has resting on my shoulder, gripping it firmly. “No, really. You’re very smart, and very kind, and I… I’m just really glad I met you.” I smile softly.

He gazes into my eyes searchingly, and I can barely hear him when he finally speaks. “I’m just really glad I met you, too.”

Whatever passes for my heart skips a beat as I realize how close the two of us are standing, how easy it would be for me to close my eyes and the space between us in one simple movement. Bucky’s pupils dilate and his eyebrows raise just a fraction, and I wonder for a moment if he’s had the same realization.

I squeeze my eyes shut for a millisecond and take a step back out from under his hand, coughing uncomfortably. I think I see Bucky’s face fall, but he’s back to his usual casual mask so quickly I think I might have imagined it.

He clears his throat, unwinding his hand wraps. I start to do the same. “Are we good?” he asks, avoiding my eyes.

I try to force my face into a normal smile, but based on Bucky’s expression I suspect it comes out at least mildly worrisome. “Yeah, Buck, we’re good. Totally fine. Perfectly normal. Well, as normal as a very old supersoldier and cosmic energy host can be.” I take the wraps from him and toss both sets back in the basket.

He chuckles, finally meeting my eyes, and I find understanding there. “Hey, what was that show you mentioned the other day - the one you said would eventually emotionally devastate me?”

I freeze for a moment - at war with myself. On the one hand, I want nothing more than to take this white flag he’s offering me, go back to his room, and enjoy another night in front of the TV with one of my favorite people. On the other hand, after everything we’ve just talked about… Well, I don’t want his pity. I don’t need his pity.

I smile at him, but it doesn’t reach my eyes. “Don’t you think we’ve had enough emotional devastation for one day, Buck?” I say, passing him on my way to the door of the gym. I don’t turn to look - not wanting to see his reaction - as I pause at the door. “Try to get some sleep tonight, yeah?”

******

Bucky makes his way toward his room in silence, head pounding with the weight of the last few hours. Cleo’s rejection stings, but really he can’t blame her. He just dropped a bomb on her life - on whatever tentative thing they’ve been building - so of course she doesn’t want to just go back to his room and watch a stupid television show. Of course he’d be the last goddamn person she’d want to spend time with.

He finds himself at Steve’s door instead of his own, as he does on many lonely nights - well, did, before he and Cleo started their little insomniac club. Bucky shakes his head to erase the thought and knocks on his friend’s door.

Steve answers immediately. “Buck? What’s wrong?”

He enters wordlessly, waiting until he’s taken his usual spot on one of Steve’s overstuffed, floral armchairs to speak. “I fucked everything up.”

Steve sits opposite him with a kind, open expression. That’s the kind of guy Cleo’s going to end up with, Bucky thinks to himself. Someone cheerful, and open, and easy, and kind. Not someone damaged - not someone like me.

Steve waves his hand in front of his friend’s face. “Earth to Buck - whatever awful things you’re thinking about yourself, knock it off and talk to me.”

Bucky sighs. He really doesn’t deserve Steve, if he thinks about it. But he knows he’s a selfish bastard, so he’s going to bother the guy anyway. “I fucked things up with Cleo.”

Steve’s eyes widen almost imperceptibly. “I didn’t know there were things to… to mess up.”

Bucky chuckles. Steve is nothing if not consistent. “There weren’t - aren’t. Not really. We’ve just been watching movies together for a while, since neither of us are very good at sleeping. We’re friends, I guess.”

“But,” Steve says, eyes full of knowing. “You want it to be something more than that.”

“I dunno,” Bucky says, waffling to obscure the truth of his feelings. But it’s Steve, and Steve always knows, somehow, so… “Yeah, I guess. Maybe.”

“So what happened?”

“I…” Bucky trails off, wanting to keep as much of Cleo’s privacy intact as possible. “I found some things out about her past. And before you ask -” he holds up a hand to stop Steve’s incoming questions. “It’s her story to tell you if she decides to - I’m not going to fuck things up any more than I already have.”

“Alright, I can respect that.”

“So I found these things out,” Bucky continues. “Things she didn’t want anyone to know. And now she says the way I look at her has changed, and I thought I’d fixed it - I thought I’d convinced her that nothing’s changed at all. But when I asked if she wanted to watch something with me tonight, y’know - like we’ve been doing lately, she just told me to get some sleep.”

Steve hums in thought. “Maybe she needed some space.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Bucky scratches the back of his neck. “But it felt like she just didn’t want to be around me.”

Steve nods. “Okay, so maybe she didn’t. Maybe you finding out… whatever it is you found out, maybe it has changed things between you. And maybe that’s hard for her.”

Bucky shakes his head vehemently. “It hasn’t, though - it hasn’t changed anything.”

Steve levels a flat look at his best friend. “Buck, sometimes things change, whether we want them to or not. You can’t take back knowing whatever it is you know, but you can at least be honest with her and try to figure out where you go from here.”

Bucky sits back in his seat, reeling. Sometimes things change, whether we want them to or not. He shoots up, standing abruptly. “Steve, you’re the smartest punk I know.”

Steve smiles up at him. “And you’re the dumbest jerk I know. You gonna go make things right?”

Bucky nods, striding for the door. “I’m going to try.”

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saintslewis · 2 years ago

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❝ 𝐈’𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 ❞

𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 — 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒

˖ ࣪⭑ - pairing: lewis hamilton x fem!oc

˖ ࣪⭑ - summary: the first meeting. new neighbourhoods bring back old family friends after many years of being apart. dinner at the Hamiltons somehow manages to make new ideas spark.

˖ ࣪⭑ - warnings for this chapter: none

˖ ࣪⭑ - saint’s team radio: omg it’s literally been ten/eleven days since i released the masterlist and i’m only posting the first chapter rn??? sorry about that baes but pls do enjoy the very first chapter of renaissance!!! mwah! Taglist is down below babies 😚 lemme know if you wanna be tagged 💗

masterlist

next chapter

Turning the sounds of Future down just a little bit as she drove into the street of her parents new home, Nadia closed her car window and eyed the grand houses that she drove past in her 8 year old Honda. Sighing, she parked into her parents driveway, seeing both their cars parked outside and decided to park behind her mother's car and watched as the house gate closed shut.

Stuffing her phone into her hoodie pouch and fixing her blonde and pink ombré hair, knowing very well that her mom will find a way to comment on the new colour, she got out of the car and locked it.

The Buckinghamshire sunset was slowly approaching, the wind not too harsh to even lift a couple of hairs but yet the Friday afternoon was quite chilly. Trees were becoming more and more green the more she looked at them and the birds definitely weren't silent. Hearing the front door open with a bit of a creak to it, Nadia's tired smile grew on her face as she saw her mom replicate the same emotion.

"Nads!" Thembi, her mother, expressed as she watched her daughter walk towards her on the pathway to the front door. Thembi definitely had an off day, wearing an ever so colourful sundress with the charm necklace that Nadia's younger cousin made. She carried something small in her hands as she extended her arms to Nadia.

"Hi mom." Nadia tiredly greeted as she leaned into her mother's arms. "2 weeks since I've seen you, nana. How are you?" Thembi said to her daughter, leading Nadia into the house. "I'm tired, there was an extra class I had to take up after school. And just thinking of the grocery shopping I have to do tomorrow just tires me even more." She sighed, looking around the grand home that her stepdad, James, had built for her mom.

Gosh, just thinking of the love that her mom and stepdad share just makes her want to cry. Moving to the Uk was an extremely difficult challenge that Thembi and Nadia had to endure, not sure how they were going to survive with just the two of them but James had met her mom and made the lifelong promise that they would build their life together and they did exactly that although wanting to care for someone as their own after Nadia. In a few days, Nadia's younger cousin would be moving in with her parents for a scholarship she received back in South Africa.

"But enough about me, does Rea need a lift from the airport?" Nadia asked, beelining towards the soft couch in the living room and immediately relaxing onto what feels like clouds. "Yes, I have a meeting the moment she lands and James has to watch over his project. I also gave her some money so maybe you guys can get some ice cream?" Thembi rushed all her words out, walking all over the place looking for something.

"Mom, why are you rushing? What's going on?" Nadia sat up properly from the couch as she watched her mom move frantically.

"Oh we've got a dinner with our neighbours, surprisingly moved from Stevenage with us. Doubt you remember them."Her mom said, hurriedly putting her earrings on in the large hallway mirror and checking her short afro. With a stunned expression in Nadia's face, she looked down at the outfit she had on then looking up at her mother who was all dolled up. "But ma, don't you think I'm underdressed for a dinner?" She asked, unconsciously holding the pouch of her hoodie.

Looking at her daughter once, Thembi shook her head before turning back to the mirror. "Please, these neighbours are super, what's the word you use? chill. We've been friends with them since your primary days." She smiled at Nadia before heading to the base of the staircase. "James! Finish up! Nads arrived so let's go!" Thembi shouted.

"Wait, how long has this been planned?" Nadia looked at her mom confused to which she just smiled at her innocently. "It just slipped my mind two weeks ago, sorry. Now, let's go wait by the front door to make James feel bad for making us wait." Her mom ordered with Nadia following after her, holding her car keys.

"I'll follow you guys there, I'll go home afterwards because I've got too much work waiting for me back home." Nadia informed her mother as she heard footsteps coming from the hallway. "Nadia! It's been too long. How's everything?" James greeted with a huge grin, side hugging his stepdaughter.

"Who knew high school kids would have so much energy when you mention a free lesson?" Nadia said, tilting her head back at the memory of her day and how it drained her. James just smiled and squeezed her shoulder as Thembi opened the front door, leading them to their cars.

Turning into the street at least two minutes away from where her mom and stepdad live, Nadia rolled her eyes at the thought that they could've just walked but knowing how her mom thinks, walking at night even in their neighbourhood was never safe.

Following James' suv through the large black gates, a much grander yet modern home came into the view of her window shield leaving her mesmerised, so much so that she even turned down her music to look at the fairy lights lighting up the driveway to the house. Looking forward, she saw a few cars parked outside of the garage onto the gravel seeing a trend of Mercedes in this household.

Finding a decent parking spot next to her parent's car, she climbed out of the car and fixed her hair once again and clicked her gel nails, trying to hype herself up to be present at the dinner. Hearing quite loud greetings behind her, she shut her car door closed and locked it and walked to the enthusiastic group at the neighbours front door. Two children ran outside as well seeming to be chasing each other with their laughter filling the air.

A gasp came from the woman with the white short hair, walking around what seemed to be her husband with her arms out. "My goodness, Nadia! Is that you? Thembi, you didn't say anything about her beauty!" The woman that she had yet to recognise stood at an arms length with her hands clasped as she examined Nadia with a large smile. Nadia was trying her hardest to remember who exactly this woman was but she put that aside and walked forward to briefly hug the woman.

"Hello." She greeted with a smile, feeling herself go back into her bubble as all the attention was directed at her. "Well, welcome to our new home! Stevenage cannot separate us!" The older man said as he turned to welcome Nadia into the house home as everyone followed in. She immediately recognised the man to be Anthony, a good friend of her parents. Everytime she would see him back in Stevenage, he was always very nice yet reserved. She's very sure that she's seen the older woman before but for the life of her cannot remember.

A much younger woman had turned the corner holding a child's hands and Nadia internally sighed in relief as she realised that she wasn't the only young person attending the dinner. "Oh hello!" She happily greeted Thembi and James, hugging them as they exchanged kind words to each other. The younger woman turned to her with a stunned yet animated expression as she smiled at Nadia.

"Hi I'm Nicola, your parents have told me so many things about you." She introduced herself then her hand pointed towards the kids. "These are my kids, Willow and Milo. Come say hi guys." The children immediately running to her with the boy being a little shy but the girl, Willow, hugged Nadia's leg and looked up at her with the largest smile she's ever seen on someone. "I love your hair!" The girl exclaimed happily, examining the blonde wig with pink ends.

"Come on everyone! The pasta will get cold!" You all heard the older woman from before voice out.

"So Nadia! My goodness, you've grown. I would remember seeing you leave for school back in Stevenage." The woman, who's name was Linda, expressed and looked over to Thembi with a smile. "So do tell, how's everything going with you?" Anthony spoke up after taking a sip of his juice.

Putting down her utensils, Nadia looked over the table to see everyone focused on her. "Well uh where do I begin. After high school, I went to Cambridge for Law but eventually switched to Education for personal reasons. Spent quite the time away from home but i would call and visit when i could. I teach at Preston Manor in Wembley, where i live as well and the past few years have been quite uneventful. I do dabble a bit in fashion from time to time." Nadia spoke, watching as the table took in all the information.

"Mum, Sir uncle loves fashion!" The young boy vocalised to his mom. "Speaking of him, let me find out where he is because we know he's always late for everything." Nicola chuckled as she took her phone to make a call.

"Cambridge? Wow! Now that's something to brag about!" Linda smiled at Nadia, giggling over to her mother who looked proud of her daughter.

Not being able to take compliments as easily as others would, Nadia shyly put her down and glanced at her manicured nails, wanting the conversation to shift from her to anything else. Luckily for her, the attention switched to Nicola walking rather quickly to the front door to welcome someone into the house. Wanting to escape the very cheery welcome of the newcomer, Nadia politely asked to go to the bathroom.

"Why the fuck is this house so big?" She whispered to herself as she dried her hands on the hand towel, exiting the guest bathroom to get back into the dining room. Hearing rather heavy footsteps seemingly walking into her direction, Nadia opted to walk faster to avoid a possibly awkward encounter with anyone at the dinner table even though she's already grown fond of Nicola and her kids.

About to turn the corner, a soft yet musky scent wafted through the air, encircling Nadia's space. What entered her vision were brown air jordans, similar to those some of her students constantly spoke of usually with grief that they were expensive. Lifting her head to look at the individual in front of her, they seemed to slow their tracks.

Setting her eyes on the man in front of her, she tried her level best to not take in his facial features all in one moment. Seeing the tattoos that decorated his arm and hands, the woman grew speechless at the amount he had. Granted she had a few of her one but his were well kept and gorgeous. The graphic shirt he had on sat very well on his body, the perfect fit that is 'oversized' and his shorts showed the athletic build he had. She tried to snap out of it and so did he.

Lewis didn't want to say he was completely entranced by the woman in front of him but this was a face you couldn't get out of your head even if you wanted. Firstly he admired the choice of colour of her hair, seeing how it suited Nadia's face so well. Moving down to her face, her nose piercing was shining under the hallway light and the lipgloss had clearly been freshly coated. The outfit was very chill, the hoodie and cargo pants combo seemed extremely comfortable on her, blanketing her in a way. As if one blink could change everything, Nadia had blinked and turned her head, looking away from him.

"Oh sorry, you can go right through." She said with a small smile on her face as she moved out of the way so he could walk past him. "Thanks.. I'm Lewis." He introduced himself and the equally as small smile was as soft as he seemed. "Nadia, nice to meet you." She responded, blinking rather slowly as she was still as sleepy as she was before. "Likewise." Lewis answered, the small crinkle by his eyes showed that he seemed a bit tired as well but he clearly did not want to show.

With that, they both excluded the conversation with one entering the bathroom with the other heading in the direction of the dining table.

Willow had opted to sit next to Nadia as she piqued the young girl's interest, quite the colourful woman with not much to say. Nadia could not ignore how the child already began to adore her, her heart aching at the thought of possibly not seeing her new best friend that she made. Creating relationships with people other than her family was tough but to see herself become comfortable with neighbours she hadn't seen in years was odd. Willow's attention clearly went somewhere else as Nadia was in her thoughts, the man from before taking the child's seat. "Hey, that was my seat!" The young girl pouted at Lewis. "Yeah, that was my homegirl's seat." Nadia jokingly said as well, looking at his amused face.

"Sir uncle, you can sit on the couches." Willow ordered as she had a staring contest with her uncle. "But that's so far?" He had giggled, completely amusing Nadia who was watching the whole interaction. "Exactly." Willow sassed, making Nadia laugh.

A small gasp came from Linda's lips as she and the others had been watching the cute scene in front of them as everyone was getting ready for dessert. "Thembi, would you look at how precious this is." The older woman gushed, eyes focused on Nadia playing with Willow as Milo and now joined the scene, Lewis and Nadia having a conversation (mainly Lewis being curious on the hoodie and earrings).

"Are we sure about what we're going to do?" Anthony looked at Nicola with her nodding her head. "I feel like it's going to work. These rumours have been off the charts these past few weeks." Rightfully as his half-sister, she was worried about her brother. Everything seemed to be hurdled at Lewis, all types of untrue things and his pr team were working hard but had not found a solution or anything to put good attention to the driver. Reaching out to the family, Nicola, Anthony and Nadia's parents had managed to come up with something, unsure of whether it would work or not.

"You guys have been huddled up together for a while now, is everything okay?" Nadia spoke up, suspiciously looking at the group. "We're discussing the true crime shows that I've recommended to them." Thembi lied straight through her teeth, surprised that Nadia bought it. All she did was nod her head and continued playing with Willow, finding Lewis a very interesting person and someone she could definitely be friends with.

taglist: @non-stop-imagines @folkloresthings @flowerchild-96 @userlando @lorarri @thisismeracing @thatsdemko @myescapefromthislife @slytherinjimin3nthusiast @jamie2305 @like-fire-love-blog @sugardontbesweet @simpfortoomanymen

dividers by: @cafekitsune

faceclaim for nadia: @/unclewaffles_ on ig!

all pictures from pinterest and ig!

#☆ ‧₊˚ saint’s media pen #x black reader #x black fem reader #lewis hamilton fic #lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton x oc #lewis hamilton x black reader #f1 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #f1 x black!reader #f1 x reader #formula one x reader #f1 x oc #f1 x you #formula one x black reader

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h0wll · 7 months ago

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Posting my current AO3 fanfic links here, please enjoy!! Crossovers will be colour-coded in purple 😊💛💜

Harry Potter/Marauders:

ziggy played guitar

Short, no-magic modern AU, domestic Wolfstar fluff one-shot with trans(ftm) Remus and ace Sirius (ft. their cat Magnus). 1,355 words.

la lune and i

No-Voldemort Hogwarts AU Moonwater potions partners slow burn with trans!Regulus Black. Ft. Rosekiller, Xenodora, and Dorlene. 8,750 words.

less than three, you love me (typing out my fantasy)

Texting/social media no-magic modern AU Marauders Era. Genderfluid!Sirius and Remus date each other anonymously and don’t realise. Ft. Wolfstar, Jegulus, Marylily, Rosekiller, Dorlene, and Xenodora. 1,664 words.

JOYRIDE

Modern no-magic AU one-shot Rosekiller get freaky in a car (HEAVY SMUT) inspired by Kesha’s new song. Ft. Wolfstar and Jegulus. 2,501 words.

Knee deep in the passenger seat (and you’re eating me out)

Modern no-magic AU one-shot Blackrosekiller get freaky in a car (AGAIN) HEAVY SMUT, inspired by Chappell Roan’s Casual. 3,815 words.

the near and the deer ones

Short, Christmas fluffshot with the Potters, Sirius, and Regulus. Pre-Jegulus but they’re happening! 2,391 words.

this sweet scent (fangs glowing red)

Omegaverse Marauders AU with omega regulus and alpha james. Ft Rosekiller, Wolfstar, and Pandalily. 6,155 words.

Sleepily, Venus sinks and hollows

Modern PJO-AU Marauders. Centred around Wolfstar and Jegulus. Everyone are demigods and go to CHB, but Kronos is rising. Ft. Rosekiller, Dorlene, Marylily, and Xenodora. 6,751 words.

Percy Jackson:

XOXO (Kisses Hugs)

Discontinued(?) PJO kinktober with trans!Percy/Ganymede. Only chapter up is pegging, though I may continue it this October?? Possibly?? 3,681 words.

My Hero Academia/Boku No Hero Academia:

Gold-skinned eager baby

MHA/BNHA AU where Touya Todoroki survived and got custody of Shoto and raised him. Ft. Autistic Shoto and Seroki. 5,717 words.

Kintsukuroi

MHA AU where Izuku Midoriya dies and becomes a ghost due to a quirk, and does typical ghost!Izu things like haunt Bakugo. Warning, this fanfiction has very dark themes! 7,775 words.

The Consequences of Iida Tenya's Foolish Actions

A Class 1-A group chat crackfic where everyone’s gay and has issues. 1,277 words.

Hatchling

KRBK kidfic with trans!Bakugo. (the kid is not kiri’s, but he’s a great stepdad). Warning, this fanfiction references teen pregnancy, underage sex, and features a teen parent. 3,414 words.

Bakugo Katsuki and his inability to keep secrets effectively

Crack fic where Katsuki can’t keep the OFA secret and accidentally starts a rumour. Warning, this fanfiction has scenes/references of sexual abuse, child grooming, and non-consensual teacher-student relationships. 2,190 words.

rather melodramatic, aren’t you? (you mind if i smoke?)

MHAxJJK fusion fic. Megumi Fushiguro and Yuji Itadori are assigned the task of guarding hero-course students during their forest training camp. (itafushi and background bkdk). 6,192 words.

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moonyeyedstar · 10 hours ago

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Hey can I request a stepdad Snape x reader? I love your writing so much

Inferior- Stepdad!Snape x stepdaughter!reader (smut)

*18+* *Maybe the reader is Lily Evans and James Potter’s daughter, up to you guys, it’s not too much into that detail, so do with it what you will!*

“Why can’t I go out with Draco tonight?!” You screamed as you threw your bag onto the ground.

“Because I told you he is not good enough for you,” your stepfather spoke simply. He was obviously annoyed by your tantrum but was unwilling to give in to your childish behavior.

“He loves me.”

“He cheated on you, and you are telling me he loves you? Do you expect me to believe such?”

“He does love me!” You protested, earning a scoff followed by an eyeroll from Snape.

“Well then, love may be blind, but your desperation is deaf, dumb, and dressed like a tragedy.”

“It’s not! I love him, and he loves me! No one else will love me like he does! So just let me go! I’m an adult! You cannot boss me around just because it is your house and mum is out of town!”

“Fine then, by all means go,” he waved you off easily. “Go grovel at the feet of your faithless boyfriend. I’m sure he will appreciate your loyalty just as much as he appreciated someone else’s bed.”

“Funny for you to say,” you scoffed.

“How so? I’ve never cheated or been cheated on.”

“Mum is cheating on you right now! She is out of town with another man!”

“She told you that?” His face drops.

“Yes! So now you’ll be grovelling at the feet of your faithless wife, won’t you?” Severus didn’t answer; he just made his way towards you slowly, his hurt eyes roaming your body. You swallowed hard. Feeling ashamed of how much he was turning you on. “What?” You asked, your voice whispering as Severus’s hand gently cupped your cheek, his dark, sad eyes growing hungrier by the second.

“You,” he spoke simply, his thumb swiping caressingingly across the soft skin of your cheek.

“What about me?” Your arousal grew between your thighs. “I want you.”

“Take me,” you spoke breathlessly. Without wasting another breath, Severus leaned forward to take you in his arms and bring you flush to his chest, practically dipping you backwards. Your hands tangled in the back of his head, his soft, dark hair entangled around your fingers as he deepened the kiss. You moaned shamelessly into his mouth, your arousal pooling between your thighs. Severus carried you up to your bedroom without breaking the kiss, laying you gently onto your back. You moaned needily into the kiss and arched your back. Your hands made their way down his chest to find his belt, your fingers working quickly to undo it. Severus groaned into the kiss as his cock grew to his full size in your palm as you massaged him over his trousers.

“Fuck, darling, this is wrong,” he pulled back slowly.

“But I need you.” You meet his eyes with your own wide, pleading pair.

“You don’t need me, you’re just upset.”

“No, I do, Severus, please. I’ve wanted you from the first day my mum brought you home. Please fuck me, please make me feel good.”

“Oh, darling,” Severus gave in to your pleading demands, he quickly rid himself of his bottoms before doing the same to you. You gawked at his impressive size. “Tell me if you want me to stop,” he spoke softly as he pressed his tip to your soaked entrance, slowly applying pressure as he buried himself deep inside your aching cunt.

“Oh, never stop,” you cried out in pleasure, arching your back to fit as much of him as you could deep inside.

“Fucking hell, you’re so damn tight,” Snape growled as he picked up his pace, rocking his hips with fevor.

“Such a big cock, f-feels so good,” you moaned out without an ounce of shame lingering on your words.

“I bet no one has ever fucked you this good,” he groaned as he pinned your hands above your head just by grasping your wrists together tightly in one of his fists.

“Never,” you moaned pathetically, sounding like you were practically gargling out your moans.

“Fuck baby, you take me so well,” Severus began to thrust in and out of your spasaming cunt at a ruthelesss pace.

“Oh yes!” Your back arched as you cried out. The walls of your cunt clung to each and every twitching vein in his cock.

“Oh, princess,” Severus cried out as he gave you his all.

“Oh yes! Oh Severus! Yes!” Your entire body shook as you came around his cock, your cunt milking every last drop that he spilled into you. It was just the beginning, he fucked you all night long.

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eyesonstars-feetonground · 2 years ago

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Jamie didn’t forgive his dad’s abuse; he let go of the control his father has over him: Ted Lasso 3x11

Watched Ted Lasso 3.11 last night, and I really regret going on social media to see peoples’ takes before watching the actual episode. Based on some reactions, I went in scared about how bad they fucked up, and came out bewildered at a general lack of media literacy and bad faith people have in shows they profess to like??

Tons of people with more relevant life experience have spoken about the controversial plot line of Jamie “forgiving” his dad, but it truly did not read to me like a story of a victim forgiving an abuser and letting them get away with stuff or even inviting said abuse back in their life. His mom, who had the most significant conversation with him in the episode imo, insists that his dad won’t change and embodies the “fuck him” attitude.

However, this episode also makes it clear that isn’t working for Jamie! He is constantly affected by the specter of his dad (looking back in the stands over and over, clearly worried about seeing him after a long gap), regardless of his dad actually being there.

Explicitly, textually, within the show, any forgiveness would be for Jamie, not his dad. But also, nothing in the show indicates that Jamie actually forgives his dad, even after talking to Ted.

Instead, to me, it reads far more like Jamie letting go of the control his dad has over him, despite not even being present. Before the conversation, the stands are a source of fear and anxiety for him (get Phil Dunster an emmy!!), but not only because the Man City supporters are booing him, but because he connects that to his dad (his mom literally says that his dad will be in the stands booing him, for him, all those Man City fans hating him could camouflage the larger threat of his dad).

After the talk, he taunts the crowd back, essentially letting go of that fear to better heal himself, taking control of a threat that isn’t really a threat at all. He is taking his mother’s advice to let his father out of his life, to stop proving anything to him, to stop setting himself up in opposition of his dad - hence the crucial climax of him making a “selfish”, solo goal, despite that being something his dad would want from him.

In regards to the text to his dad at the end, it was the most bland text I’ve ever seen. There was no forgiveness or emotion to him hoping his dad would be okay, it’s like a text you sent to an acquaintance from ten years ago because you heard their dog died. Instead, this is also Jame in fact letting go of his anxiety and fear - multiple times, he is anxious *because* the last time he talked to his dad was when his dad showed up unexpectedly in Wembley, and he’s constantly paranoid it will happen again. In my mind, this is Jamie taking control of the situation while being emotionally distant in order to cut that sense of anxiety out and make the first step toward that inevitable meeting again. He is reducing his dad from a terrifying unknown to a situation he starts and can control.

Because this time Jamie knows he will be able to handle whatever is thrown at him; not because he deserves or accepts abuse but because even if abuse is doled out to him as a result of reaching out, the rest of the episode shows how much love he is surrounded by, how much support. When the announcer says “this must be so meaningful to his family,” it is his mom + stepdad, his coaches, his fans, and his team we see first. His dad is an afterthought (though I think it is completely in character for the “forgive and humanize everyone” show to have his dad also choose to heal - completely separate from Jamie’s own journey or even his knowing.)

And that the direction he has chosen to take is in honor of that love, and for that love of his team and his real family.

People keep saying he should have cut his dad out entirely, but he is already doing that at the start of the episode, and for this specific person and situation, it isn’t working. It isn’t contributing to his healing process, and it seems kind of one note for everyone to insist that all victims be able to or willing to cut people out of their life. Peoples’ relationships to their abusers is not black and white, which the show has already demonstrated with the fact that Rebecca and Rupert can have good times together while she still has strict boundaries and knows he was and is abusive.

I thought Jamie’s story was a well done, nuanced take that didn’t give an inch to his father’s previous treatment of him, from Jamie or the people around him. I believe even Ted offers the path of forgiveness because he recognizes Jamie is in a place for it - an emotional place where he has moved beyond anger and spite, and a physical place where his dad doesn’t present physical danger to him. The episode was so sincere in showing how badly his dad’s abuse has hurt and damaged Jamie, and how forgiveness, for him, means choosing to let that relationship stay in the past and move on.

Respect to everyone’s opinions though!!! I think it’s totally okay to be critical of the show, especially when some story lines are so important and sensitive. I just truly didn’t even see the biggest issue most people have with the plot line, which is a sincere forgiveness of abuse i.e. that the abuse was okay. I definitely also think him blocking his dad would be another way to get control over his anxieties, but not one I think meshes with the tone of the show.

Anyway, sorry for the rant, but I loved the episode—though I do think next week will rip my heart out.

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #ted lasso 3x11 #ted lasso: episode tag #ted lasso mom city #mom city #analysis #jamie tartt #richmond #ted lasso episode 11 #please don't message me about like how wrong I am or reply with hot takes bc this is my acknowledged opinion #i never post and will not be responding

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