#I LOVE HIM HE'S SO SILLY | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cablecar-s · 9 months ago

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to love and self loathe

part 1 part 2

WHO ARE YOU? I AM– WHO ARE YOU? I AM–

"This is a joke right?"

The Spider was currently at her work place, standing in front of her boss; all the while said boss was going through the limited and slightly blurry photos she was barely able to obtain that week.

Honestly the female vigilante was very drained that day, and being nagged by her boss was the last thing she needed at the moment.

"I can barely use these photos for an article you know." She sighed out, throwing the printed out photos down onto her desk.

Letting out a small sigh, the vacationing Spider pinched the bridge of her nose. "With all due respect ma'am, I'm quite literally risking my safety while trying to take pictures of these vigilantes, even with them around there's no telling what would happen to me if I were to let my guard down."

Looking at her boss, she gave her best polite smile, though it came more forced than anything. "So if you could so kindly give me more than just a week to hand in the photos of Gotham's vigilantes, I can guarantee you, you will be able to obtain the photos you have high expectations for."

Crossing her arms, she stared at the woman who sat behind her desk, speaking once more before the demon of a boss could cut her off.

"But, if you so badly need these photos by the end of each week, I would not mind you having to heavily compensate me if something were to happen in order to obtain those photos." Smiling tightly, the air was tense between the two woman.

Staring each other down, the woman with a higher status let out a small sigh.

"Fine. Just make sure the photos are of better quality when you turn them in." She leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms.

A bit of satisfaction lifted the vigilante's mood a bit, a small smile on her lips. "Maybe if you were to give me a raise it would motivate me more to give high class photos."

She watched as the woman frowned at her, telling her to not push it while calling her by her last name. The two only stared at each other more though until the older woman finally relented, too tired to put up with all of her employees' bullshit.

"Get the hell out of here." She waved the young woman away, who only left her office with a happy hum and a higher paycheck.

Maybe things were starting to look up for her, at least she hoped. Walking down the street, she made her way over to a small coffee shop that seemed to be mainly empty.

Opening the door, a man who stood in front of the register gave her a tired greeting. Asking for a minute, she looked at the menu above her head, her eyes skimming through the multitude of drinks, wondering which one she would get, as well as debating if she should get something sweet for herself.

All the while, two men entered the small shop and stood behind her, their voices in a not so low whisper.

"Is Black Mask crazy!?" The second man practically yelled.

The first man tried to shush him. "Quiet you idiot! You tryna tell the whole world 'bout Black Mask's plan!?" He hissed.

'Black Mask? As in Roman Sionis?' She furrowed her brows, staying quiet as they talked, though the shop went quiet, and the hair on the back of her neck began to stand up, the familiar tingling feeling coming to her.

Her eyes darted up to the convex mirror that was placed at a corner of the ceiling of the shop, and she could clearly see the two men staring at the back of her head.

Shit.

"I'm ready to order!" The woman quickly said, making the employee look at her with expectancy.

She began to make her order, watching as the employee began to punch in her order into the computer. She started to ramble a bit as well, trying to not make the men so suspicious of her, talking off the employee's ear off about how she wasn't able to choose from all the many options on the menu.

Glancing at the convex mirror again, the two men seemed to have decided to leave her alone for now, continuing to talk behind her.

"Won't the bats and all the other scary assholes come and get us though?" The second man questioned.

"That's why boss decided to plan a decoy that's far from the Wayne Mansion! While they're all busy tryna take us all down at the warehouse, the rest of us are gonna be crashin' that brat's birthday!"

Wayne Mansion..? Birthday..?

"Here's your order ma'am." The employee set down a to go cup and box, making her quickly snap out of it.

"Thank you." She beamed, leaving a generous tip, a way to apologize for talking their ear off.

Quickly leaving the shop, concern began to grow in the pit of her stomach. She wasn't too familiar with all of Gotham's criminals, but she did know of Black Mask. A man who strikes fear in all. Runs multiple drug cartels and has other illegal businesses, that, unless you want to end up on his list, it would be best to not dig too deep into what he does.

While walking back to her apartment, the tingling sensation came back, her senses heightening. She soon heard two pair of footsteps follow behind her.

So they did realize she was eavesdropping on them.

The vigilante quickened her pace, sharply turning a corner into an alleyway.

"Get the bitch!" One of the men yelled.

Chasing after her, they ran into the alley, but they only found it empty.

"Where the hell did she go?" One growled.

"Who cares, lets just hurry up and find her before she ends up spilling the beans to the cops, or worse.." They quickly left the alleyway, running off, not knowing that she was right above them.

Her heart pounded against her chest, her to-go box balancing on top of her cup of coffee as she had climbed up the wall.

Once they had completely left, she jumped down from the wall, letting out a sigh of relief, both her coffee and cake weren't dropped. Peeking from the alleyway, she looked both ways twice, before quickly making her way back to her apartment, her eyes darting around every corner once more, straining her ears for any footsteps that followed her.

When she got to her apartment, she had locked her door and all her windows, setting her now cold coffee and cake onto her kitchen counter.

Letting out a tired sigh, she sat down on her couch, closing her eyes for a moment to catch her breath and calm down.

Gotham was nothing like New York. Although both were quite crime filled, New York didn't seem as bad as Gotham was.

Running a hand through her hair, the words of Black Mask's men rang in her head. Pressing her lips into a line, she reminded herself that she was taking a break from being Spider-Woman, maybe even for good. She couldn't let another innocent life die to her hands.

Her leg began to bounce, her eyes almost staring a whole into her laptop, curiosity and anxiety eating at her.

"I'll only be taking a look, it's fine.." She muttered, giving in to her impulses. Opening her laptop, she quickly began to type away, researching as to what the two criminals were talking about.

Her eyes skimmed through every article about Bruce Wayne and this birthday party that he was holding. It seemed he was celebrating his youngest son's birthday at the end of this week, and from what information she had gotten back at the coffee shop, she figured that Black Mask was going to take the boy hostage, most likely wanting money from Bruce Wayne.

She had to do something, she couldn't—

No.

Nope! No way!

She said she was going to step away from being Spider-Woman, so she should do exactly that. No more living like a vigilante, and instead live like an innocent civilian. It's fine, all those other vigilantes can take care of it. There's like, what? Seven? Eight of them?

Closing her laptop, she let out a small sigh.

"We're starting anew, remember?" She muttered to herself, getting off the couch so she could get away from her laptop and treat herself to the small coffee and cake she had bought herself.

But as she sat down, no appetite had come to her, and the coffee wasn't good anymore now that it was cold.

Everything is fine. The others can handle the situation when it comes.

Right?

. . .

Wrong.

The days continued to go by, and each and every day the woman would stare at her closet, her mind going back to what she had learned, only to try and convince herself that she wasn't needed.

Her life as Spider-Woman had come to a close, and she made her peace with that.

Yet, why is it that on the day of Damian Wayne's birthday party, she was staring at her spider suit that was splayed out on her bed.

Closing her eyes, she rubbed her temples, heavily debating of going or not.

'Remember, with great power...'

"...Comes with great responsibility." She sighed out, finishing the quote that the ghost of her uncle reminded her of. "Yeah.. Yeah I know Uncle Ben.."

Looking at her spider suit, she couldn't help but slightly smile, seeing it again. "Lets save this party then, if they need me that is.."

Quickly suiting up, she put her web shooters on and left through her window.

---

Shit shit shit shit.

Jason was running late.

He had just finished dealing with Black Mask's men, who were in the opposite direction of the mansion. Honestly, Sionis really thought that he could get away from his watch by using a warehouse at the edge of Gotham?

Yeah right.

Taking a quick shower, he got himself dressed, ignoring the obvious dress code to dress fancy, fuck that.

Leaving his safehouse, he drove off into the streets of Gotham, taking one of the many roads to the Batcave.

The sound of his motorcycle roared to life, speeding past the many traffic lights, his helmet glinting under the street lamps. Jason went through one of the many secret tunnels under Gotham to get to the Batcave, his tires screeching to a halt once he was at his destination.

Something still didn't feel right to Jason, a gut feeling as one would call it. While taking off his helmet, he ran a hand through his hair, trying to not make it seem so matted from his helmet.

Kicking out the stand of his bike, he left his helmet on the seat before making his way up the stairs and out into the mansion. Jason stared down at the ground, his feet leading him to the room where Bruce always held his parties.

Deep in thought, he ended up not taking notice of a butler who had instead noticed him. About to open the door, an all too familiar voice spoke out to him.

"Master Todd."

He jumped a bit, about to take out his gun until the person spoke up again.

"It is just me Master Todd." Alfred spoke up, causing Jason to freeze in his movements, once realizing who it was that called to him.

Looking over at the butler, Jason gave a small smile, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket.

"Hey Alfred." He greeted.

Alfred smiled at him. "I see you were able to make it to Master Damian's party after all."

Jason chuckled at this. "Couldn't keep the brat disappointed."

The butler chuckled as well, taking in the second Robin, for not having seen him in a long time. Walking towards him, he rested his hand onto his shoulder, having to tilt his head up ever so slightly from how tall he is now.

"It is good to see you dear boy."

"Yeah, you too."

"And though I am glad to see you have made it to the party, I hope you weren't thinking of bringing that gun with you." The older man rose a brow at the young adult, to which Jason slightly scoffed.

"C'mon Alfred, you should know I wouldn't bring a gun to a fancy party." He tried to play off.

Jason only watched as the butler had an unconvinced look on his face and soon extended his hand out and waited patiently.

Nothing really did ever go pass him.

With a chuckle, Jason held his hands up in defeat and took out the gun that was hiding within his jacket and set it into Alfred's gloved hand.

Alfred only gave him a knowing look, eyebrow still raised, making Jason laughed just a tiny bit more.

"That's all I brought, I swear." He gave a boyish grin, making Alfred chuckle a bit, a hum leaving him.

"I will take your word for it then Master Todd. You may have it back once the party is over. Have fun, and make sure to not cause trouble." He smiled before leaving Jason by himself.

With a small smile, Jason watched him walk away before turning a corner, disappearing from sight. Turning back around, he stared at the door that led to the ballroom. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, trying to calm his nerves.

Opening them back up, he twisted the door handle and made his way in the room. Inside, he was met with music playing mixed with the conversations of different aristocrats of Gotham, all of them talking amongst themselves.

Jason never liked these parties, even when he was Robin, they were always stuffy and full of fake smiles. He shuffled his way over to the corner of the room, watching everyone chat among themselves.

Leaning against the wall, he crossed his arms and just people watched, not wanting to draw any attention to himself, that is until he was quickly found by his annoying brother: Dick Head.

"Hey! Jaybird!" Dick called out.

Jason slightly glared at him with how loud he was, all the while the first Robin glided his way over to him with ease.

"Thought I wouldn't be seeing you until tomorrow." He grinned, handing him a glass of champagne.

Taking it graciously, he took a sip of it, looking at Dick for a moment before back at the crowd.

"Yeah well I didn't have anything else to do tonight so I thought I'd just drop by." He replied nonchalantly.

Of course, this statement was partially true.

Dick only chuckled at this, glancing at Jason only to look out at the crowd as well. "Right." He hummed. "Did you at least go see Damian?"

"Not yet, it seems he's busy being coddled." Jason let out a huff of amusement as he tilted his head over to where Damian was at the moment.

Looking over, Dick could see Damian not seeming the least bit happy as his cheeks were being pinched by a few elderly women, Bruce standing behind him to make sure that Damian doesn't do anything that'll cause a scene.

"He's busy alright." The first Robin snickered a bit, crossing his arms.

The two brothers soon ended up in a slightly awkward silence, both Robins not knowing what else to talk about. Jason had taken a quick glance at Dick, his fingers drumming against his bicep, mentally debating over whether it was okay for him to ask how the others were or not.

Grimacing a bit, Jason kept mulling it over, clearly overthinking it, until his 'fuck it' mentality kicked in.

"Hey—"

BOOM!

People screamed at the loud and sudden noise, rubble splaying everywhere in every direction while the mansion shook at the explosion.

"Nobody move!! Or the brat gets it!"

To everyone's horror, people looked and watched as one of Mask's men had an arm securely wrapped around Damian Wayne's neck, while the barrel of a gun was pressed harshly against his temple.

Jason and Dick glanced at each other, the both of them having the same idea. Quick and quiet on their feet, they stuck close to the walls of the ballroom. The two men slightly hunched over, they took advantage of the large and panicked crowd to slip out of the ballroom.

"I knew Sionis was planning something." Jason snarled, a few steps quicker than Dick. Making his way to the grandfather clock, he moved the hands to 10:48 and the large clock soon swung open, Jason entering first with Dick following behind him.

"Are you saying you knew Black Mask was going to crash the party today?" Dick furrowed his brows, the two men quickly going down the metal stairs, their footsteps echoing against the cave walls.

"What? No!" Jason exclaimed, furrowing his brows.

Walking to his bike he put his helmet on, the inside of his helmet coming to life. Turning around to face his brother, Jason quickly shielded his eyes, seeing for a split second that he was stripping himself of his clothes.

"Woah! Really Dick!?" Jason exclaimed.

"Relax! I got my suit under here!" The first Robin laughed out.

The second Robin only grumbled, hesitantly looking over, only to see that the oldest was telling the truth, his arms stretched out to present himself, a shit eating grin on his face.

"See?"

"Dickhead.." Jason muttered under his breath and began to walk away from him to one of Bruce's trophy cases.

Dick only laughed, grabbing his escrima sticks he left when he came to the Batcave after patrol. Making his way over to Jason, he watched over his shoulder as his brother had pulled at a trophy, the part of the back wall of the trophy case having flipped to reveal two pistols.

Dick whistled at this. "When'd you have time to do that?"

"I have a lot of free time." Jason mused, his voice modulated from his helmet. Checking out his guns and making sure they were in top form, he looked at Dick and nodded his head to the entrance. "Lets go."

The two exited the Batcave, jogging back to the ballroom.

"So what did Black Mask plan?" Dick questioned.

"What?" Jason glanced at Dick, the two stopping in front of the door.

Dick huffed, putting his hands on his hips. "You said he was planning something?"

"I didn't know he was planning to crash the party, but he made some scam shipment on the opposite side from the mansion. Too bad for Sionis that I work fast."

"And sloppy."

Jason glared at Dick who only shrugged, smiling a bit. "Let's just go." He muttered.

Taking hold of the door knob, Jason glanced over at Dick who only nodded to let him know he was ready. Swinging the door open, the two vigilantes readied their weapons, ready to take on Black Mask's men.

Only, it seemed they were already beaten to it, almost.

In the middle of the ballroom, Damian was still being held hostage, but now, standing a few feet away from them, and talking, was what seemed to be another vigilante? Her suit being very plain, the only thing really noticeable was the spider insignia on her chest, the webs that decorated her suit, and the very big lenses that were supposed to be her eyes.

"I mean, really! Who brings guns to a party as fancy as this! And on the kid's birthday too? Now that's a low blow."

Jason and Dick looked at each other, slightly confused.

Just who the hell was she?

part 1 part 2

next chapter ->

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #batfamily #x reader #no y/n #to love and self loathe #red hood #damian wayne #richard grayson #nightwing #tim drake #spiderwoman reader #dick is just a silly goober #I love him he's so silly #alfred pennyworth #BUTLER MENTIONED!!!#reader has the spiderman humor #dcu #dc universe

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