#I AM SO DEEPLY ENAMOURED WITH THIS MAN

[lovearion]

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT

[imhavingdifficulties]

personally i think if i was given the chance to have sex with hatsune miku i would weep and then bend over

[didishawn]

Breeding + Size kink w Ferran please????🤭🤭🤭🤭

Baby fever (Ferran x Reader) smut

Warnings: smut, breeding kink, size kink, some Spanish

Masterlist

You would have been dumb to not notice the signs.

It all started after a favor for your brother, taking care of your noisy, annoying yet lovable nephews so he could go out and get laid. Ferran, being the amazing boyfriend he is, obviously went with you.

And from that moment, your boyfriend's baby fever started, and doesn't matter how much he tries to hide it, you notice.

How he stops to watch baby clothing shops, sometimes commenting on how cute the mini shoes are.

His tiktok only showing him baby videos, the same on insta.

He is always offering to look after any teammate's baby.

You notice it the most, when he is inside of you, babbling of how pretty you would look pregnant, begging you to let him cum inside, talking about how bigger your breasts will be when filled up with milk.

You never have the opportunity to talk about it, as he always acts innocent and confused when you dare to comment about it.

You decided to address the problem yourself.

Ferran's hips have a quick and desperate rhythm as they hit against yours, one hand on your hip to keep you in place, the other foundling with your breasts, there is a special twinkle in his eye that makes it clear to you what he is thinking about.

He groans as he watches his cock thrusting inside of you, the pace has you moaning out at how rough and unforgiving it is, your nails digging into his back motivating him to go faster.

The bed is creaking, you are sure one day he will break it at how strong e goes. He is so much bigger than you, doesn't slow down when your little hands push into his lower abs, his mind only thinking about how sweet your small figure will look when your belly is round and full of his children, one kid after another, his brain already enamoured with how you will look pregnant with his child.

"Joder, amor. You are so tight around me. Fuck you every day, yet your little body doesn't seem to fit me yet. So full of me, will be fuller once you are pregnant with my kids. Gonna have lots of them, won't we? Them running around and you pregnant with the next" (shit, love)

You dumbly nod at whatever he says, honestly your mind is so hazed from the pleasure you cannot fully comprehend, bit you can guess what he is saying. Not even he knows what he is rambling about, you walls are tight around him, as if wanting to milk him from everything he has to offer, one time, another and another, too many rounds have passed, too many rounds are yet to come. The night won't end until he is satisfied with how many cum there is inside you.

"Fuck me harder, Ferran! Fill me up! Make me pregnant with your children so we can have the family you so long for, my love. I cvant wait until I am full of you. God, Ferran, you are everything. Everywhere I see you are there, so fucking big"

He groans, head falls back as he cums once more, breathing deeply and playing with your clit making you too fall over the edge.

You are too sensitive, he knows, yet can't help but kiss your breasts, sucking one nipple and play with the other, you moan at the feeling of his cold chain against your hot skin.

He doesn't move from inside you, one hand reaching out for something, he picks up your hips, levelling them up and putting them on top of the soft pillow he had picked up.

"Like this my cum can go deeper. Rest up, darling, we are not done yet"

You decide to have the talk later, your boyfriend seems to gave forgotten you are still on birth control.

You are comfortable as you cuddle into him, both of you rambling about the future.

It may not be now, but you, are sure you will have this man's kids.

[plague-karm]

Okay since people actually wanted the oc x canon shit here it is ig. I also want to preface this by saying that I am VERY inexperienced with writing characters from pre-existing IP’s (I mostly write for my own characters) so if anything’s OOC here then that’s why. But the funnie rock man has consumed by my brain so yeah. Here’s some background stuff about Carissa and other things regarding this funnie little thing I came up with.

Carissa is the heavenly virtue of charity, the seven heavenly virtues are some of the only creations god doesn’t regret due to them enacting their purpose without any pushback and they live on a completely different plane of existence as a result, high ranking angels visit them often as their domain is nearest to heaven.

My voice claim for her is Christy Altomare.

Unlike the angels who don’t care about humanity, the virtues haven’t lost faith in them (they often talk to the humans who ended up in heaven during the final war, soothing their fears).

She has pet rabbits that she tends to in her private sanctuary that she loves dearly.

I know Sisyphus is based more on the Camus poem rather than the Greek myth but the constantly cheating death thing fits with the concept of Greed WAY too well so I’m including it (this will come into play later).

Greed is the lowest layer she’s willing to go to (Wrath is the midpoint of how bad the sins are and I feel like the lower layers are that depraved that no one really goes there).

Sisyphus overthrew Midas here because of course he did.

He created the moon pendant so she could visit him in Greed more frequently because the rays and dust damaged her body.

One of his main motivations for getting with her was the fact an angel was heavily pining for her and the thought of cucking the enemy was too tempting to pass up (he got to spite the oppressors and he got a wife win win).

The formation of the council took FOREVER so that’s how Carissa got away with being with him for so long.

They get together before Minos’ death and separate before the Greed Insurrection.

She saw his beheading and is the only living being who knows the location of his husks head.

Carissa and Gabriel are actually pretty close which makes what happens later pretty fucked up. Things get complicated.

I’m subscribing to the theory that Treachery is a frozen wasteland and will make hell freeze over because it’s cool.

Okay let’s get into this shit wheyyyyy

PRE-GAME

Carissa is a VERY respected figure for obvious reasons, she was kind, compassionate, and giving to all.

When god disappeared she was incredibly concerned about the state of heaven and what could become of hell with the peering eyes of heaven averting their gaze.

So without telling anyone, she secretly travelled to hell with the intentions of reporting her findings to whoever would next be in charge.

Limbo was a ghost town, she wasn’t expecting much there anyway, but she felt…wrong.

Why were those who didn’t believe in god here? He wasn’t a physical presence, how were they supposed to know if he existed or not? And the books she found…they made her feel sick to her stomach.

They were innocent, slowly being driven insane by the superficial world around them, a constant reminder of what they could’ve had…

No, it couldn’t all be like this right? Besides, Lust IS a sin, surely that’s a place where the depraved souls of the damned deserve to toil in eternal punishment?

So she ventured deeper…and what she found was shocking…

A city, a paradise, she couldn’t believe it, all of this…? Was built by those who sinned…? Was what she was told up there even real? Several people putting aside their differences and building a better life for themselves…it moved her deeply.

She eventually met Minos and was heavily conflicted.

Surely she should report this right? This was against the father’s law! The punishment created by him was being turned into a reward!

…But still, she just couldn’t do it, she was enamoured with the city of Lust, her home was usually quite bright so the change in scenery was very much needed in her eyes.

She would continue visiting in secret, her and Minos had similar philosophical views so they became quick friends and of course her meeting Sisyphus was inevitable.

He was immediately intrigued, she was the complete opposite of him, and he had no idea why she hadn’t said a word to heaven about any of this.

He wasn’t rolling the boulder! Minos’ methods may be too passive for his tastes but they were STILL defying heaven! Why wasn’t she saying anything to them?!

He didn’t mind it of course (hell it was actually pretty convenient considering what he was planning) but still…

They hang out in Lust normally because a majority of meetings are held there (plus Minos was literally the JUDGE of hell it makes sense).

Carissa was very intimidated by Sisyphus at first, and who could blame her? His disposition and his history was enough to put anyone off.

He noticed this and it irritated him quite a bit, he may have killed a few people and used every outsider who dared enter his kingdom on earth as an example but come on he wasn’t THAT bad!

Her first travel to Greed didn’t go well to put it lightly, the heat was almost unbearable, if it wasn’t for lower levels of Sisyphus’ place (I like to think the area in 4-3 and 4-4 was where he lived) having significant amounts of shade she would’ve passed out for sure.

As a result she mostly goes to Lust due to the cooler atmosphere.

He doesn’t know what to do…he likes seeing her anywhere but the fact that she barely visited him in his own layer…it irked him to no end.

So he had an idea.

A way for her to visit him.

It took forever but he somehow made it.

The moon pendant.

He requested her presence and she showed up fairly covered since the heat still got to her.

He used the pendant and she was in AWE.

The night sky was beautiful and the air was clear instead of being humid to a suffocating degree.

She asked him why he did this, and he said that the fact that she couldn’t visit due to her body’s limitations frustrated him to the point of creating the moon pendant as a way to make her time with him more convenient.

This is where it started.

Minos could IMMEDIATELY tell what was going on with Sisyphus, him doing something for someone else (especially if that someone wasn’t from greed) was EXTREMELY out of character for him, he knew him very well, he was one of the only people Sisyphus respected as an equal regardless of him disagreeing with his methods so he immediately figured out what was happening and he was ecstatic.

Carissa on the other hand didn’t know what to do, she had SO many admirers from heaven…so out of everyone she could’ve fallen for why did it have to be HIM?! She was terrified of what could happen if people found out, she may have been incredibly high ranking but she wasn’t invincible, her sisters of virtue could cast her out! He could be killed!

But…the fact that he would go as far as to create a day and night cycle in Greed for her sake…the way he made sure that he took on the load for his people if it was too much for them to bare…it moved her in a way she couldn’t explain.

Sisyphus could TELL that she felt the same, but he was patient (as he always was).

He knew she was worried for good reason, even though he didn’t fear them, he knew exactly why she did.

He was okay with being killed as long as he stood by his beliefs but she was innocent, she wasn’t a cog in their corrupt system, she was BEYOND them, and helped the people in the layers regardless of her status, that was more than enough for him.

Over a VERY long period of time he finally confessed and she accepted gracefully.

The two came to an agreement, no one could know about this (except Minos of course), if it was up to him he’d show her off like no tomorrow, but he knew that her position would be in jeopardy so for once in his life he was subtle.

He would send her gifts pretty often when she was in her sanctuary, they were unsigned so no one knew it was him, Gabriel delivered them (the guy was also a messenger and the fanart I saw of him delivering mail was funnie so why not).

He would often ask who kept sending her these overly luxurious gifts but she’d say she had no idea.

It was mostly night time when she visited him but she had eventually gotten used to the heat there so she visited quite frequently regardless of the weather.

They bantered a lot, she felt like she could be herself around him, less formal and more relaxed.

She really likes his voice, it soothes her when she’s feeling stressed about the disappearance of god, it may have happened a while ago but it was still on her mind…

He was aware that he had an effect on her and used that to his advantage, he’s a very smooth talker (he cheated death god knows how many times so he definitely has a way with words).

Carissa is fully aware of this and sometimes calls him out on it, it’s all in fun though.

LOVES his hair, she always wonders how he keeps it in such good condition despite the weather of greed being so brutal.

He has met her pets, he wasn’t expecting so many of them but hey they’re quiet at least.

Sometimes watches them play fight in his throne room, gets oddly invested despite how ridiculous it looks on the surface, their battle tactics are interesting.

He sometimes wonders how they can withstand Greed’s temperatures, but he tries not to think about it too hard or else he’d risk going insane.

They take nightly walks often, he made clothes for her so she wouldn’t blend in with the environment in case anything bad happened, they’re very comfy :)

Her comfort is his top priority no matter what, he respects her and makes sure everything in Greed is at its highest standard whenever she comes over.

They were both aware that they were walking on thin ice so the wedding was VERY lowkey, he never told her this but the actual event kind of disappointed him, he thought she deserved more, but she was fine with it, she was just happy she was with him.

Things were great…

That all changed when Minos died.

Carissa wept while Sisyphus grieved silently.

He knew this would happen, he KNEW…but a small, foolish part of him hoped that what Minos had built there would work out…but it wasn’t meant to be.

A few nights later he told her about his plan to put insurrection in motion.

The watchful eye of heaven made it harder for Carissa to sneak into Greed but they made it work.

They would become distant during this time, his focus on the army was too great, the plan he had been formulating for millennia was FINALLY coming to fruition.

Carissa was VERY worried about him despite his demeanour being the same as ever. Regardless of their differences she knew Minos meant a lot to him.

This culminated one night in an argument, she exclaimed that this was putting his people in extreme danger, that he could DIE doing this…and he responded saying “I know”. It was a risk he was more than willing to take for his and his people’s salvation, regardless of what his fate would be.

This was too much…and then he told her to leave, he knew that if she chose to stay with him during the insurrection she would be killed (she was high ranking, but defying heaven was considered heresy, regardless of who it was).

She had no fighting experience, she only existed to spread peace and joy, the thought of her dying, leaving her rabbits behind, HIM behind…he couldn’t bare it.

She was heartbroken, but she left without another word…she was devastated. He almost wept himself…but his plan was too important, he had dedicated his entire afterlife towards this, he couldn’t stop now.

Divorce Arc :(

The day of the insurrection was witnessed by all of heaven, even Carissa, because she wanted to make sure he would be okay…

And then Gabriel descended upon high…and Sisyphus’ head was displayed for all to see.

The last thing he saw was the horror in her eyes as his conscious left him, her sobs were like whispers compared to the cheers surrounding her as he was slain.

She grieved in private, she knew he’d be happy about this, fighting against his oppressors until his last breath…but she didn’t want things to end between them the way they did.

She would return to Greed in secret, horrified by the fate of the Sisyphean Insurrectionists, mutilated and ripped apart except for the bare essentials…

She would use the night pendant to make their punishment slightly more bearable.

During one of her many secret visits she found the head of his husk…she would visit it often as a way to deal with her grief.

She’d tell it everything, what she did that day, how the rabbits were doing, how much she missed his company…his humour…everything. She had never felt this empty before in her life…

She would write about her feelings in several empty books, ones she kept hidden throughout the deepest depths of the temple.

She didn’t talk to Gabriel much after that, she knew he had practically become a vessel for the council’s cruelty but it still hurt.

He thought she avoided him because she wasn’t used to him committing such violent acts (nah bro it’s because you killed her friend and her husband idiot 😒).

POST-GAME

Carissa continued her duties but the light in her eyes had lost its lustre, something her sisters of virtue took notice of.

They were worried about her, but she’d always brush them off.

Since we know the council gets murked later on the fathers light would die alongside them. Heaven knew this and they were free for their final moments…

The heavenly virtues had no idea though, so when they slowly died off along with her rabbits Carissa was terrified and confused until she went down to heaven and realised that the end of times was upon them all.

Gabriel became aware of Sisyphus becoming a prime soul, being slain at the hands of the machine…but unlike those before him, he wasn’t fooled…

Minos’ will to go on was snuffed out the second the machine robbed him of his chance at vengeance…

Sisyphus cheated death several times, his tenacity was as annoying as it was impressive, he’d do it again.

He KNEW he’d do it again.

He travelled to Greed to see if he had returned to his domain and inevitably found the books Carissa left behind…and everything clicked for him.

The constant disappearances, the gifts, the ring she wore, the fact she could barely look at him…my god, it all made sense.

He knew things were going to end soon, he knew his time would soon be over…

So he wanted to do a good deed for his dear friend one last time.

He entered the barren sanctuary and saw her sitting motionless, the last embers of the fathers light filling the once vibrant scenery gifted by he who left them…

He kneeled beside her…

“He isn’t dead…”

“…What? Gabriel, I saw you-“

“His soul lives”

“…”

“I know it does…and I know about…what happened between you…”

“How do you-?”

“I went down there to see if he tried to rebuild it, I saw your books…you spoke fondly of him”

“I hoped no one would find out…”

“The machine had him slain, but you know him better than I ever will…”

“He’s always been stubborn…even in the face of impossible odds…”

She chuckled weakly, she always admired that about Sisyphus, no matter how the odds were stacked against him, he’d always go for it, regardless of his actions (she knew he wasn’t perfect) that was an aspect of him almost everyone respected.

“Do you want to see him again?”

She turned to look at him for the first time in years, of course she did, the last thing she wanted was to die in this cold, dark world alone.

“Do you know where he is?”

“No, but I will be able to sense his presence if we go down there together, I can’t stay with you though, if he sees me there will be a fight…and you deserve to go out peacefully”

She nodded, they travelled to Greed…they found him, he was standing alone, a shining light in the rubble that was once his home. Carissa whispered.

“Thank you…”

Gabriel nodded and left without a word, Carissa approached him quietly, standing beside him, looking over the remains of the Insurrectionists and the landmarks once littered across the dust below. He looked different, but she could tell it was him.

Sisyphus finally took notice of her presence, barely managing to restrain himself from doing anything too emotional.

“I thought you would’ve gone up there and completed your mission by now…”

“No, the weapon will get further than I ever will…are they all…?”

“Almost…”

For the first time in his life he wasn’t sure what to do, this was the first time he had seen her in years…should he apologise? But he got what he wanted…no…he had something else to tell her, something that would mean more than a handful of words he had never said with once with seriousness.

“I heard you…”

“Heard what?”

“When you were talking to my husk…I heard all of it, I felt your kisses, I thought it was all a dream…I just wanted to make sure you knew that before you were gone”

She wanted to cry, he heard her? He could sense her sadness, after the way their relationship ended he wouldn’t have blamed her if she never wanted to see him again…but she came all this way…the least he could do was provide her with company before the jaws of death claimed them…

The two talked about everything before their time was over, trying to regain the years that had escaped them

The fact that she was still wearing the ring after all this time…that meant so much to him…more than she could ever know…

And then he could feel it, the cold…

Hand in hand, side by side…they died together…

And he didn’t regret a second of it

[skyrim-forever]

Day 4: Enamoured

A/N: Day 4 is here, and I happen to have completed entries for days 5&6 as well :) Dare I say we are so back??? Probs not gonna get writer's block after this istg ANYWHO this one features Ondolemar wondering why he hasn't heard from Theodora in a bit and getting an answer in the last place he'd ever want to... tagging @tes-summer-fest

The briefing with Elenwen was wrapping up and soon he’d be able to leave Solitude. It was difficult being there, reminding him of her. It had only been a few weeks since he’d seen Theodora but he was getting worried. It wasn’t like her to at least not write and unfortunately as she was never in one place for long, he couldn’t write to her. Being enamoured with her had its downsides, the longing in between seeing each other, having to hide due to their respective factions; but the benefits were far greater. There was a reason the poets wrote of love, sung its praises so highly, loving her made him better. Theodora showed him a world outside of the rigid hierarchy of the Dominion, a life where he did not need to wrestle with his own inferiority and the weight father’s actions. 

“Ondolemar” The Ambassador's voice snaps him back to the present moment. 

“My apologies Ambassador.”

“You are distracted.” She coughs. “Correction, you have been distracted.” a small tightness begins forming in his chest. 

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean Ambassador.”

“Do not play dumb with your superior. You think I do not know what you have been doing.” His face remains calm but his chest grows tighter, heartbeat racing. “Normally I would not care where you throw yourself, if you are interested in being a disgrace to our race that is fine.” Elenwen throws the stack of papers she had been holding on the table. “But with a high ranking Imperial soldier? The Empire’s most formidable weapon. Are you daft?” She knew his ears ring with her words, cutting through him. The inevitable was finally here, crashing in around him. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Your words mean nothing to me. I have seen how you act. But it is no matter now, the Dragonborn listened to reason, I made her an offer she could not refuse and now your little plaything will not be distracting you anymore.” 

“What did you do?” The question comes out louder and more forceful than he was expecting. Relax, don’t give her anything to work with.

“Your concern would be admirable, if it was not so disgusting. Do not worry no harm has befallen her, I am not idiotic. Your little trist is not worth an early war. I promised to play nice and avoid war with the Empire in exchange for no longer seeing you.” 

He would look back on this moment and wonder how he could have been so blind. The Dominion was cruel, he himself had done unspeakable things in the name of their cause. But in that moment, the full weight of their cruelty had come crashing over him. Despite his wretched father and disgraced family upbringing, he rose to be a mer of important prominence within the Thalmor. He did everything they wanted and yet he still had not been good enough to get a respectable posting. They sent him to Skyrim, to the Dwemer City of stone and lies. It was one thing to know he’d never be enough in their eyes but now his superior has taken his love from him. His love, the one who had shown him that the lines between mer and man were more muddled, both deeply flawed as they were mortal. If his faith in his nation was not already completely crumbled, it was now. Now is not time for a crisis of faith he decided I need an escape plan. Escape and find her. 

“I understand” the words hurt to say, a punch to the gut. All he needed to do was act a little longer. 

“Excellent. I knew you would, despite your upbringing you are a fine soldier, this is just a small lapse in judgement. You are dismissed, I will see you next month, new orders have arrived from the Isle.”

“Understood. Good day Ambassador.”

The trip back to Markarth was spent entirely scheming. Outright defecting would just cause them to hunt him down. No one left the Thalmor alive. Alive, that was the answer. They’d have to think he was dead.

[leggerefiore]

Hello, Hello! I saw that your requests are open, so I wanted to make one, after being way shy, aha-

I had this idea, about Archie or Maxie in self aware au, helping you escape the real world by teaming up, because you had, er, not-that-good things happening in life, and I though maybe I can request that?

You can decide who to write about! I am okay with any variant. And feel free to decine, I don't want to make you uncomfortable!

Bye, have a good day!

cw: self-aware au/ddlc au, fluff mostly

characters: Archie, Maxie

looove writing these two together bc their pieces get to be parallels of one another haha. didn't really go into detail about the "irl situation" since it's from the characters pov.

🌧Archie🌊

💧 He was not exactly sure when he gained his consciousness. Maybe he had always had it? Archie did not really care all too much for the philosophical enough to debate it. All he knew for certain was that you were always there. Not the player character that stood before him, but you. He had seen you a few times, he knew. Originally, somewhere in the first run and then a few times after throughout the following… years? He could only run off the internal 3DS clock, which wasn't reliable when you could change it at will. Yet, he knew. You changed. Got older.

💧 The salty winds around him may have been virtual, alongside everything else he knew, and he may have been aware that everything he was doing was for naught and the same end point. That all did not matter. He saw how much you deeply enjoyed the game and was happy to play out his role for you. Though, he was more than eager to see how much he could get away with altering things before you would get suspicious. Something to keep you coming back to him. At some point, he knew that he had become enamoured with you.

💧 Many times, he pondered if there was a way for him to leave this place. It seemed like there had to be a way, but he felt himself unable to do anything significant. A feeling of incapability was haunting. Only worsened by you returning for yet another play through. This time… You seemed different. And not in a good way. It was obvious something was bothering you out there in that unknown world to him. His stomach dropped. Even this fantasy world did not seem to bring you any comfort. Archie thought on it for a long time. Long enough for you to nearly have beaten the game.

💧 It was at the final scene where he was about to awaken Kyogre and send the world into chaos that he finally broke his carefully crafted role. His small character model looked up at the screen with a bright smile. You seemed a bit frightened by the sudden change, but he did not really care at this point. The Aqua Leader knew he could win you over. He had realised something. He could not go out to you, but what about the reverse? “Hey, scamp!” he called out with a new text box, “I get this is startling an' all, but I wanted to ask something to ya.”

💧 He could see the tears that glistened in your eyes more than often enough to make him concerned. “You want to come in here?” he asked. You froze. Staring at the console and rereading the line of text that he had created. It obviously was unbelievable. What were you trying to convince yourself? He could only wonder. “C'mon, I'm not a glitch or whatever yer thinking. It's a genuine offer,” he continued. You blinked this time. Then, you brought your hand to the screen. He reached his own up towards yours.

💧 You could only gasp when your hand actually went through the screen. His own found yours and pulled you in, bringing you entirely into the world lingering behind the screens. You fell onto him as you both landed on to the rocky terrain beneath you. Gasps left you as you gazed around to see the other characters in the scene standing there. Arms came around your waist as the pirate man held you to himself. “Don't worry, they won't react to you,” Archie reassured you with a hardy laugh. You could smell the scent of the sea all about and fell the stagnant air of the cave now.

💧 You both departed from the story beats as he took you to stand on the beach of Lilycove with him. The salty air stung your eyes and nose, but it felt so real. Especially with the unexpected ally in the form of the game's villain. Archie stood beside you with a dreamy look in his eyes. He had an arm around your waist, seeming to prefer keeping some touch on you. All the troubles that plagued you felt so foreign when standing in a distant world with no ties pulling you back. You could see real pokemon, too. It felt impossible. “Well, yer definitely more perked up now,” Archie spoke to you again, “Feel free to stay as long as you like. Nothing really changes here without my or your input.” You gazed at him. He gave a big, playful grin as the ties of his bandana blew in the wind. Here, you felt more at peace.

☀️Maxie🌋

🪨 He could recall the exact moment he became aware of his sentience. It was terrifying, after all. A moment where you realise everything around you is fake and doomed to an eternal loop depending on how often, if ever, your player decides to reset the game. Your second play through was an existential crisis for him, that is to say. The great Maxie was nothing but lines of code, doomed to repeat the same idiotic plan that nearly killed everyone. He would originally only look at you in annoyance and upset. This was your fault somehow. But, he felt connected to you, even still. He could only watch as time passed and you changed.

🪨 Everything around him was fake. Archie was fake. Courtney and Tabitha were fake. Yet, you were real. You were someone he could always find changing with time. He began to understand why you replayed so often. Escapism. His hell of a reality was a fun break away from the hold of the world around you. It might have annoyed him to be stuck how things were, but he was also a perfectionist. The role he was assigned was followed dutifully with little to no swaying from was to be done. Maybe you would get bored and leave him to an eternity of darkness. You never did, however. (Maxie was silently grateful. Your company was the only thing he had going for him.)

🪨 It was all in vain, the many times had attempted to escape thus digital prison. There simply was no escaping the slowly ageing device that he had been trapped within. It held him tightly in his place, never allowing him the freedom even peer into the world that you inhabited. His brain rushed deeply with curiosity about what lied outside. It was strengthened by you returning for yet another play through of this game. But, he felt stricken. You seemed upset – distraught. So much so, that not even rushing to this fantasy world provided any comfort. Maxie's stomach twisted painfully. (Why did he want to help you badly?)

🪨 It was in the Seafloor Cavern that it finally stuck him. Just right before he was to awaken Groudon and bring about a hellish drought that would exterminate all life on earth. He looked up at you. Maxie could not leave, of that he was certain, but could you not enter? He had never broken his character before you, so he felt nervous as he broke the scene's progression. “Hello,” the text box read simply enough at first, “I know this must be unsettling and a bit terrifying, but may I ask you a question?” He let a “yes” or “no” prompt pop up.

🪨 Your eyes went big, glossy with tears and puffy from whatever had been happening before you returned to the game. Maxie swallowed. What was happening to you out there? It hurt for him to consider you. Nervously, you pressed A on yes. He closed his eyes for a moment. “I am not a glitch, nor is this some form of hacking,” he clarified to make it abundantly clear that he was his own free-thinking man, “Do you wish to join me in here?” You froze, obviously unsure about what he said. A moment of contemplation followed. Then, you brought your hand to the screen half-heartedly. He brought his own up.

🪨 Your hand passed through the screen, startling you, but Maxie's hand had already taken hold of yours. Carefully, you were pulled through the screen. It felt like you were falling for a moment, but a sturdy grip helped you regain your balance. You opened your eyes to the heat of the room and stagnant air around you. The other characters in the room stood frozen. You looked around before seeing him. The red-headed man readjusted his glasses in a nervous manner. “Welcome, I suppose,” he nodded toward you, “Don't worry about them, they don't react without input.” He explained. You stared at the magma nearby in fascination. It was real.

🪨 Maxie led you out from the cavern and back to the surface, choosing Mt. Chimney as a place of comfort and getaway from everything that was currently happening in the story. You stood on the mountain curiously, smelling the sulphur in the air as the wind carried the heat of late summer. The Magma Leader stood by you dutifully, fully aware he was going to have to teach you a lot about this world. He stiffened when you leaned against him suddenly, watching distant Illumise and Volbeat float around in the darkness of the night. “You are free to remain here however long you like,” Maxie told you, “... You seem happier now. That's good.” His hand came to hold yours. He gave a small smile to you, watching your reactions carefully. His red strands escaped his careful styling as a stringer breeze blew by you both. Finally, you felt some sense of peace.

[beabnormal24]

Hi! For the shipping asks: 👅 💖 💔 (if you want to!)

Oooh, good one. i love answering asks.

1. 👅 (ship that you find most sexy)

I mean, Charlos, of course. I guess I don’t even need to explain myself on this one, but I guess I’ll do it anyway. I will say that in my personal opinion Carlos is the sexiest, in the sense that he has that sinuosity in his movements and that elegance and finesse in his gestures that just makes him incredibily sexy.

If you want to look at it in a figurative way, I see Carlos like Matthew Macfadyen in Pride and Prejudice, so hot in his austerity.

And Charles? Prettiest boy ever, so delicate but also clumsy and silly and sexy in that completely self conscious and self confident and effortless way that attractive people who are constantly giggling their asses off are. He’s the epitome of babygirlism and sassiness, but you should not doubt him - which is exactly what Carlos never does.

Figurative example? Jonathan Bailey as Tim Laughlin in Fellow Travelers during the ‘50-‘60s episodes.

Together? Sexiest ship alive.

2. 💖 (Ship that needs more love)

Since I am deeply undecided, I’ll offer two options.

First one, George Russell and Max Verstappen, also known as Gax. Why, do you say?

Their dynamics would be incredible, apart from the entire obvious enemies to lovers mechanism, let’s spend some time talking about their characterisation - because you all know how much I like that.

George, your next door British boy, curses in lower case and says Blimey and Crikey like it’s normal. He cares about his looks and his appearance. He’s thirsty for competition, neat, honest, proper, terribly impatient although he tries his very best to not let it show.

Now, Max? Curses in bold, replaces Hello and Hi with Shit and Fuck. Doesn’t care about his appearance as much as he cares about his own cats. He’s thirsty for competition, neat, honest, proper, terribly impatient and he lets it show.

Conclusion: they’re basically the same person, just in different fonts, similar in their dissimilarities.

One is Calibra Light, the other is Calibra Bold, and they’ll clash their horns against each other like angry deers, but then they’ll notice how good they actually look together, how good they work together, how good they match and boom…

No chances for anyone else, two puzzle pieces completing each other.

Uh, I might write something about that.

Anyway, second one? Alexander Albon and Logan Sargeant. And tell me if I even need to explain myself on this one.

They are the ship, they have everything!

Logan blushing furiously and falling for Alex’s teasing and looking at him longingly and smiling like a lovesick fool whenever Alex gives him attention or jokes about his obsession with America. He’s so enamoured with Alex that he even started copying some of his attitudes, because he’s that in love.

But let’s be clear, Alex is falling just as hard, because Logan is so cute and he likes the way there’s someone who actually looks up at him - not only figuratively, lol, because Nicholas is tall - and he blushes in such a cute shade of red when he calls him Logie Bear.

Alex might be a little bit obsessed with him.

I need to write about them.

3. 💔 (ship that makes you sad)

I honestly don’t know how to answer this one, I guess it is based on personal interpretation.

I would probably say that the one that makes me a little bit sad is Dando.

Ironic, you may say, but let’s think about it for a second.

They started to bloom a little late, because Lando was still attached to Carlos and Daniel isn’t as careful around boundaries as he should be in certain situations, and although Lando has clearly grown into an overconfident young man that we love to see thriving, he does initially still need some limits - like Carlos and Oscar had religiously respected.

But then they had bloomed, they started getting along like a house on fire. People do not realise how hard it actually is to become so close in such contexts without having any strings from before - like Alex and George or Charles and Pierre or Oscar and Logan and so on.

Lando went to his house in Perth, voluntarily, just to spend time with him and do crazy stuff on his farm and have the time of his life with someone that is ten years older than him.

But they get along so well that who does even care about age differences?

But just as they started to really develop through their relationship, shit happened and they got separated.

I’m really glad they still bloomed - sharing clothes like in Monaco and sharing jet rides and visiting each other and going to dinners together and stuff - but it does make me a little sad the thought that, in some twisted way, things still tried to put themselves through their building affection.

It also makes me sad the fact that, because of all of that, they didn’t get to shine as bright as they deserved.

That’s it, hope you liked my answers and please Ant let me know about yours, too! 🩷🩷

[atlasreign]

Sickening realisation that Rhys is too soft for love. Like, this is a man who yes, put work above everything but is known to love so deeply that it'll make him ill. The fact that he was searching for the girls, romantic or platonic — that love he held for them kept him pushing & pushing, sending out more and more people to look for them.

But yeah. He's too soft for love. Too soft for love, too soft to be loved. The posts, re: love language, how his is so distinctly touch and showing signs of affection through offerings. These display that Rhys is absolutely a Worshipper love type, and this is horrendously detrimental to him and his wellbeing. The fact that he's so quick to forgo sleep to comfort another, or to spend hours trying to find ways he can help them; that's unhealthy.

His understanding of love has been so skewered by how he was treated in the past. How Stacey used his love to benefit her and threw him away when she was done. How he was hopelessly enamoured by the entity that was Jack and the legacy he left in Hyperion, only to be told that he was a means to an end, that his life was to be forfeit. That Jack feigned interest in him just to get a new body. How he had Sasha in his arms, but was so unsure this time around what kind of love it was that he just… Let it die.

He doesn't know how to love properly. If offering his life is right or wrong, if being willing to hurt and be hurt is the answer. He's so incredibly fucked up by it, when I say he's soft, yes he's soft because he can love too much and craves it too much, but I say he's soft because he's also willing to be burned up for it. He barely pushes back. Hell, his response to a love confession is literally to say "you don't have to love me back." As much as he yearns and craves to be loved he's also so acutely aware of his past mistreatments that it's second nature to simply say, don't force yourself to love me, because it'll only hurt me when you're done.

He always thinks he's overbearing, when he feels his presence is too much for someone, he'll take himself out of the equation. Temporarily or permanently. He'll leave spaces and isolate for days to try and balance it out. He's an unhealthy lover because he's so, so willing to sacrifice skin and bone to appease someone.

But on the other side, he is so affectionate, vocal, so emotionally tethered that you'd have no greater partner than him. Someone who adores you, looks at you like you're the sun. Being so utterly blinded by you. You would become all he sees when he looks at joyous elements in the world. He would be there when he's needed, acting as an anchor, emotional support, physical support.. Whatever is needed, he'd be there.

Overall. Though he is too soft to love & be loved, and is at risk of ruin… He will do so with grace, with devotion in his lungs. With a heart that is so loyal, that if it were to be touched by hands other than his beloved's, it would wither. You'd never have someone as loyal as him, so sacrificial.

i shared this in server, and now it comes here. i am sick for rhys. i am romantically ill for him.

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

actually tell me about grima

lolol no Downey? ;) And yess, I am always here for spooky snake man

First impression

I was twelve when I first saw him in the films and absolutely found him creepy. I remember thinking him also a bit wet and sad. But mostly I was like "spooky man alert!"

Otherwise, I didn't think too much of him off the bat. I was very enamoured with Eomer and Eowyn when I was a kid and first watching TTT and wasn't really thinking about anyone else.

Impression now

Well, obviously he is the smallest, wettest, most pathetic weasily snake man out there so I necessarily love him.

He's still a spooky creep. Like, my impression of "spooky man alert" remains present. But I just really enjoy exploring his character now because he is so fun to write. He's sarcastic and mean and petty and pathetic and passive aggressive and obsessive and weird and cowardly and selfish etc. but he's also smart and cunning and clever and a desperate survivor against terrible odds and and all of that bundled together is just an absolute joy to explore.

Favorite moment

In the movies? When in ROTK Theoden calls up to him "you were once a man of Rohan" and Grima has that "please save me; please be good to me; pleasepleaseplease" facial expression. Gets me in the chest every time.

In the books? Probably when he's sassing back at Treebeard. The battle of wits against Gandalf is also a pretty great scene, won't lie.

Idea for a story

I feel like I just write everything that ever comes into my head as it pertains to Grima.

Oh, there is one that I run in my head when I'm at the gym and it's a what-if-Grima-became-king and it's a whole heck of a lot of fun. He's like, good at administrative stuff and running the kingdom but he's cowardly and deeply uninspiring. A less inspiring man is hard to find.

So at some point, there's a moment when he has to make a choice of which side Rohan is going to join in on. Like, they're a vassal state of Sauron but there's a chance Aragorn et al will be victorious and the ring destroyed etc. so Grima has to decide where he's throwing his lot. It involves a lot of very fraught scenes with Eomer telling him to be a good person for once in his life and not to be a selfish freaky coward and Grima is like, "but Eomer, all I am is a selfish freaky coward. It's like, my sense of self in three words."

Unpopular opinion

He should have lived at the end of ROTK. I think most of my many, many opinions and thoughts on Grima are unpopular because it's unpopular to have a view of him that isn't inherent condemnation of the entire character. He's definitely one of the one's Tumblr is like "wish we saw him violently murdered on screen for his Crimes and anyone who likes him is clearly disgusting" about.

Favorite relationship

Theoden! Fucking tragic as shit, man. There's clearly such history between the two and, once upon a time, great trust and affection. That somehow went sour. The movies do a good job showing this in ROTK "once a man of Rohan" but the books have Theoden missing Grima's presence and guidance, even as he is navigating a situation that Grima got them into in the first place. Clearly there was affection! Trust! etc.

Love it.

Favorite headcanon

He's just gagging for it where Eomer is concerned. lol.

More seriously - I like my headcanon that he's well traveled. That he fucked about it in his youth - so like fifteen to mid-twenties he was traveling around Gondor, up north to Lake Town, out east a bit and so on. So he's seen a lot of stuff and picked up a lot of stories, lore, wisdom from his journeys and that's seen as one of the benefits of initially bringing him into the king's household. Rohirrim are quite insular and so having an advisor who has seen a bit of the world is a good thing.

[gatorlovebot]

Looove love love prettyboy!Ghost. He's so skittish about showing you his face, so closed off and avoidant like he's an animal that doesn't wanna be approached that you end up convincing yourself he'll be so ugly. You obviously don't ever mention it to him, but in your head you imagine him disfigured beyond recognition, prepare yourself to find him faceless (noseless, lipless or anything alike) and still love him deeply, unconditionally, regardless of how far his appearance may be from what people imagine when they think about a man.

Can you imagine having him let you see his face for the first time (schooling yourself to have absolutely no reaction other than enamourment when he shows you his face, no matter how far away from a normal face it may be) and finding out he has the face of a Hollywood star? I can totally imagine yourself snorting -cause like how is it not funny??? That this dumbass conditioned you to expect the absolute fucking worst when all this time he had a face cut from stars???- and the chaos that ensues because obviously you laughed at his face

Anyways I'm sorry I got carried away I think you can imagine the rest

hi nonnie, i am in love with pretty boy ghost too! but i am unfortunately a proud member of the cocky ghost fan club. that man thinks he's hot shit most of the time. but i do think he does have some hangups about his physical appearance, especially when it comes to a significant other. his face is somewhat a representation of his Trauma and it can make him a little on edge with you. but i like to imagine him taking his mask off way early on in the relationship as sort of a test to see how you react. i think the laughing bit is very funny because if he took his mask off and was as fine as i imagine him to be? i would be fucking nervous giggling! and the rotten little dickhead would of course take offense to that, grumbling to himself before you make grabby hands at him to kiss all over his pretty face <3

[x-authorship-x]

What would Shisui x Zabuza look like to you?

Hey Anon~

It looks like a damn good time to me 😂

There's four fics, I think, on this pairing on AO3 and I've probably read all of them...? It's been a while

Tbh, if people are interested, I might do one of those "rank character" thingies and post it here because then you'd all see that Zabuza is very high up my list. I have a great love for him with Kisame, too. Who am I kidding, I'll ship almost anyone if it's good 😂

Anyway!

Zabuza:

He's loyal 😤 this man loves his village so much that he's attempting a coup to yank it back onto course, he literally made a political statement as a kiddo by massacring his class (which is like, the innocents? But also hardcore)

Rocking single dadhood, he's so gruff and yet cares deeply (idgaf about canon dialogue let me have this), Haku and Itachi were BORN to be conjoined at the hip (it's genuinely a wonder that Sasuke didn't have an aneurysm from the similarities of personality to pre-massacre Itachi)

How the fuck does he hold that sword??? His back must be insane and Kishi just didnt have the time to render it properly. Imagine Shisui running up the sword in Shunshin? Excellent 👏

He is willing to do anything for his beliefs. Shisui has met his match. Also, Zabuza has an extremely hard won loyalty but when you have it? He will KILL you if you die on him, Shisui deserves this ❤️‍🔥

Shisui would probably meet them on a job, maybe Zabuza is really hard done by when Haku is younger because he can't contribute to income/fighting and Zabuza is distracted with protecting him (possibly impacting Haku's determination to be a useful weapon) and Shisui Shunshins into the fight. Zabuza has this moment of "oh shit a leaf brat" and then that immediately turns into "oh shit THAT leaf brat" because maybe Ao already has a Shisui-grudge. Shisui is breathtakingly fast, he absolutely slaughters the enemy, and Zabuza is like fuck okay Haku you run with the money and get as far from here as you can, he knows that if he doesn't kill Shisui then there's no way Haku can evade him.

Shisui, who is the favoured Uchiha both with babysitting and outside of the Clan, catches Haku very gently. Figures out what's going on. Has Zabuza considered joining or subcontracting to Konoha? Zabuza will do anything for Kiri, even working with her enemy because the current Kiri isn't the one he's concerned about but the Kiri that will come after... Voila! You have Haku being aggravatingly (to Zabuza, Shisui is loving this) starry eyed over Shisui's speed, Zabuza is reluctantly impressed with him, and Shisui is... Well. Enamoured. He doesnt know many men who would tear down the system just to lovingly reforge it afresh. Makes him want to do the same with Konoha... But no, surely not~

A great ship, Anon!

[imhereforscm]

I hope you aren't too busy to write this. 😔 Some of my relatives were chatting with my mom and dad. One of them said that i will have a hard time getting anyone in life because, i have too high expectations. Mom was going to say something ( in my defense), but my dad cut her off and said, " She(i) has her head full of nonsense. I am sure no man will ever want to love her." They didn't know was standing behind the door. I felt horrible.

I know this isn't anything serious. I should probably not bother you with this request, but i need some comfort please. If you have enough time, please write something with Tauxolouve x reader about this. Thank you.

"Enamoured by you"

Genre: comfort

Warnings: none

A/N: Hello, love!! I'm deeply deeply sorry for the delay, but life really got in the way recently. Anyway, here it is now! You're beautiful inside and out and there's undeniably someone who will love you unconditionally, just like you deserve. Whatever they said, I want you to know it's wrong!! One day you'll find that one person who will enjoy to listen to you from morning until night, because they love your mind so much. Love you!!💖💖

Standing behind the door, you remained hidden, yet you could not dodge their venomous arrows that they threw at you with their tongues. It wasn't the first time you heard them speak ill words to describe you, but it is one of the things that never cease to stop hurting. It will always hurt.

You held your breath and stepping quietly, you returned to your room, throwing yourself into your bed and folding your forearms onto your pillow.

Your back and shoulders shuddered with sobs and although you did your best to keep your cries down, sobs still managed to slip out, the cotton of your pillowcase unable to hold such sorrow and your tears formed stains.

You remained there, feeling alone, stabbed in the heart and with the odd feeling of being both hot and cold.

After a while, your eyes dried and all that was left behind were reddish eyes, like rose petals that someone didn't mercy and stepped on and a heart that was merely aching, now somewhat numb.

The noise from the living room had disappeared and the guests were gone, just like nightmares were, once the sun rose, yet the bruises on your heart proved those dreams to be a reality.

You opened your bedroom door, coming out into the hallway and kept walking, until you found your way outside.

The weather at this time of night was chilly and a single soft breeze reminded you that you forgot to bring a jacket.

But you didn't want to go back in there... You feared encountering your father, someone who should love you unconditionally, but chose not to.

Wrapping your hands around your waist, you wandered around the dark street in front of your house, the cool breeze making the dried tears on your cheeks feel cold, like crystals.

Then, your feet stayed in place and you eyed the tall figure of a man, standing on the other side of the road, on the opposite pavement.

The man seemed to stop as well upon seeing you and for a brief moment, you wondered if you two had ever met.

"(Name)?" He spoke, as he crossed the road. "So it really is you." He said, smiling pleasantly. He approached you, stepping into the yellow light of the street and you were finally able to see his face clearly. Kind dark eyes stared down at you and kind wrinkles had formed at the corners, which disappeared as soon as he noticed the tears on your face. "Have you been crying?" Tauxolouve asked, concerned.

You tightened your hands round yourself and shivered as you looked up at him, your jaw shaking a little. "No... I haven't been... Been crying."

Tauxolouve sighed and slipped his coat off, before draping it across your shoulders.

"What about you?" You asked, not shoving your hands into the sleeves just yet.

"I'm a god, I won't get cold." He said in a soft voice and you breathed in deeply, accepting his offer.

"Thank you..." You said, shoving your painfully cold fingers into the pockets of his coat and relishing into the sweet shiver of the warmth, accompanied by your boyfriend's caramel scent that was imprinted on the fabric. "Were you out on a job?"

"Yeah, I was. Now..." Tauxolouve's hand found your cheek and he traced your dried tears with his thumb. "Will you tell me what happened? I only wish to help you."

"I don't want to cloud you with sad stories." You said, staring off into space. "It has happened before and I'm used to it."

"No, that's not how it should be." He protested, his tone firm, but it made you feel secure. "You shouldn't treat the things that hurt you as normal or usual." Tauxolouve wrapped a hand around your waist and the other went to the back of your head, pulling you into his chest. "Whatever hurts you is not something you should get used to. You should reach out and open up."

You sighed shakily and hugged him back and the might in this simple hug made him realize further that something was definitely not pleasant.

With lips cold from the night breeze, you spoke of your troubles and of all the thorns their words had buried deeply inside your heart. By the time you finished talking, tears had built up once more and were ready to fall, which they did, once you looked up at Tauxolouve.

Tauxolouve held your temples in his hands and pressed many kisses to your forehead. "My little lady." He whispered against your skin, a voice so soft as if you were a dove he feared he'd scare away. "I don't know why some people choose to hurt others... But I know it's harsh and cruel and it hurts the person receiving those words. So hear me out. Let me be your safe space..." He kissed the tip of your nose and pulled you back into a hug. "Sometimes, people's words can sound... So big... So real... So real they may swallow you. But what they said is not the truth. They cannot—no matter how hard they wish for it—they cannot decide your worth. It sounds to me like those people don't know you at all, even though you're family. Because if they knew you, they'd know how much you're worthy of."

"But you know... Sometimes I believe them. I believe I'm not worthy of being loved." You said, your voice broken as you sniffled and the hot tears fell, warming up your cold face.

"There's nothing in their words that's true though." Tauxolouve pressed a kiss to your temple and all alone in the street as you were, he tightened his hold on you. "Besides, I love you. What's there not to love? Even your flaws are precious. What they said is not true. I am madly in love with you!" Tauxolouve's eyes held passion. Passion for you and no one else. And looking within them, you felt as if you could believe in anything. "We're gonna prove it to them one day."

"How?"

Your boyfriend smiled and leant in to leave a soft and feather light kiss on your lips. "One day... I'm going to marry you."

Your breath died in your throat at his words, your fingers loosening up around the fabric of his shirt. "Do you mean that...?"

"Of course I do. There's no one elese I'd ever want to spend my life with. There's no one else with a mind and heart so beautiful." He touched his forehead to yours and stared deeply into your eyes. "There's someone there for everyone. Everyone will find someone to love them. You, for example... You have me. I'm so enamoured by you."

[brothersgrim]

TO, KANE: NAME: "Cody." AGE: "Don't remind me that I'm closer to my forties than I am to my twenties. It hurts." DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE?: "Oh, come on. You know it. It's always nice, but it was something else when I was goin' through physical therapy." CAN WE MAKE-OUT: "Whenever you want, big man." A NIGHT IN OR A DINNER OUT?: "It's up to you. I like spoiling you by taking you somewhere nice and showing you off, but a night in's nice, too. We could watch Star Wars." ICE CREAM OR CHOCOLATE COVERED STRAWBERRIES?: "Chocolate-covered strawberries are more romantic and classy, aren't they? Have to go with ice cream, though. I'm not gonna pretend I'm that sophisticated. I have the Lego Millennium Falcon in our bedroom." WHAT MAKE YOU A GOOD VALENTINE?: "I don't know. I dress nice. I'm good arm candy. Is that conceited? Yeah. But I have Pharaoh, too. He's got credentials than I do. And him and Mewchine playing is preeeetty cute." WOULD YOU COOK FOR ME?: "Yeah. You're a great cook, better than me, but I like doing things for you. And I can grill a pretty mean steak. Yeah, so can you, but I'm the grill master here. You have fire. Unfair advantage." WOULD YOU LET ME COOK FOR YOU?: "You cook all the time. You deserve to take the night off. Let me take care of you. ... But I'm not gonna say "no" to your cooking." I TRULY, DEEPLY, LOVE YOU, CODY

VALENTINES APPLICATIONS

Oh, he can't respond. He's speechless. Not in the bad way - not in the stolen words way.

No, it's just hard to talk because he's in the process of burying his face in Cody's hair, holding him close. Safe to say, he's enamoured. Truly, completely wooed. There are a few points that stand out, that keep echoing around his head.

Showing you off.

Let me take care of you.

Words that just... Stuck with him.

Cody knows him too well.

"You're right." He eventually says, muffled though it is. "They are pretty cute."

[dastardly-ethereal-love]

Mmm… I think if audiobooks count then I do ‘read’ published works - I’m listening to the discworld series by Sir Terry Pratchett on Audible and I found out that Diana Wynne Jones wrote Howl’s Moving Castle so I listened to that on Spotify. I read Fire and Hemlock as a teenage and looooooved it and it’s by Diana Wynne Jones. I want to get a hard copy of that book and read it in the reals again. I loved the layers of magic, the word play and the cello. Cellos are sexy af. Mr Lynn and Tamlin and all the manifestations of that person just broke my heart and drew me in and made me fall in love in such a lasting way. I think I only read it once but it was so damn powerful.

I have loved books since I was a child - maybe deeply loved them from when I was 10 or so and recommend a Victor Kelleher book (I think it was Parklands?) and then followed by Isabelle Carmody by my school librarian. Then I was off and running. I got books from my school library and local library and saved my pocket money and bought the books I truly loved to keep and reread at my leisure. I had a book book where I wrote down an author at the top of each new page and then all the books they’d written and would tick off and date each one I read. I was obsessed. It was escapism. It was hedonistic.

My dad even took out the lightbulb in my bedroom because I’d stay up too late… he took batteries from my torches and I resorted to candles! Not the safest but I was determined. I even remember reading by the hallway light that slid under my bedroom door. For reals. Books were my jam.

I did have other interests, haha! I drew, wrote my own teeny poetry and short stories and played computer games and road my bike to the local bush reserve and ‘communed with nature’ fancying myself Wiccan for a time alongside online friends. Hey, it was the 90s/00s! Everyone was into witches and vampires and such. 😅

I loved music. So damn much. I was learning piano… dated boys and mostly avoided trouble of the lasting, serious kind. I got good grades and learnt French from a real French man… haha Still am so enamoured with the language. High school years are so much. You are so busy learning who you are.

Now that I’m 38… a lot of those early experiences are still relevant but I think it’s time for a new journey of self discovery. :)

"you read a lot, right?"

"yes!"

"what are some books you've read recently?"

"uhh i don't remember"

[ignitedfms]

[ bie thassapak hsu, demi-man, he/they ] Look who just landed! SANTI AMARIN-ZHAO, I sure hope you packed all you need. Perhaps you’re not worried as the CEO of X ACADEMY. The city has plenty of spots for a 29 year old SIGHIR like you. You’ll be known in the city soon enough as THE PEACEMAKER, being CHARISMATIC and INSTIGNANT. ( fayn, 29, pst, removed for discretion )

00000 - - INTERVIEW INCOMING - - - 001

001101 1- - ARE you A LOCAL OF MARS OR HAVE you LANDED HERE RECENTLY? WHAT IS your OPINION OF THE CITY OF NEW JAKARTA? - 00011011

“God dammit… Not again.” Santi let out a frustrated sigh when he saw the calendar notification. “Lunch” had been replaced with “DNB - Meeting with OVERSEER”. That was the third overbooked lunch this week alone… and the fifth time he had spoken with THE OVERSEERS this month. 

Not even five minutes later, he was welcoming the uniformed officer into his office at X HQ, inviting him to sit opposite his desk chair, offering him a drink, and not leaving any trace of his prior frustration as the thinly-veiled interrogation began. “Born and raised here.” Santi replied without skipping a beat, a note of practiced pride in his voice. “I’m proud to say that my mom’s side of the family was one of the investors of the scientists back on Earth who discovered how to get to Mars, and my dad’s side of the family was one of the original Braax mine owners. Together, my family helped fund and create X ACADEMY nearly four decades ago to further scientific research to better NEW JAKARTA. It is an honour that I get to continue their legacy to help ensure NEW JAKARTA becomes universe-renown for innovation and a symbol of peace in our solar system.” Santi might as well have read his UNN 30 Under 30 article verbatim. 

The irony of being called “THE PEACEMAKER” while being a glorified drug and arms dealer was not lost on Santi, but as the relatively new and young CEO of X ACADEMY, he had a duty to the people of NEW JAKARTA — to obtain peace at any cost. Even if it meant manufacturing problems which he created solutions to.

Amidst rising tensions throughout the city and all stratas of society, people were desperately looking for hope. There was a space to be filled, and Santi gladly took it. It’s not like he had a choice in the matter anyways. Might as well be at least outwardly happy about being the posterboy for his family’s ambitions to turn public opinion in their favour.

“NEW JAKARTA is a city of potential. I see it everyday—in the people I work with, in the citizens of the city, and in the very planet we inhabit. I’m sure if we all work together, a dream of putting NEW JAKARTA on the galactic map will be more than just a dream.”

0101022 - - ARE you AWARE OF THE CRIMINAL CIRCUIT OF NEW JAKARTA? WOULD you BE WILLING TO INFORM THE OVERSEERS IF you SEE ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY? - 001200

“As much as I would have liked not having a reminder—unfortunately, yes. We are victims ourselves, y’know…” Santi made a show of rubbing his temples, as if the mere thought of crime troubled him so deeply, it gave him a migraine. “I was the one personally on the phone with the Force Leader for hours after the latest heist. Priceless, life-changing research now in the hands of criminals, what will THE BOARD say…” He shook his head. “The woes of a CEO, am I right?”

What he neglected to say was that it was on his verbal order that the location of the NEMESIS production facility was leaked. Truth be told, if he hadn’t been slammed with meetings, he probably would’ve told THE SKELETON CREW the location himself just to see if he could start some issues in THE SLUMS for some added spice in his life. Things got boring when it was too peaceful, and pitting pawns against each other was one of his favourite past times.

Santi’s trademark smile then appeared on his face. The same smile that adorned his UNN 30 Under 30 article, the same article wore at the press conference after the heist. The smile that enamoured him with the masses and gave them reassurance that real change was coming. “I, of course, look forward to continuing our esteemed partnership. I dare say that the future and peace of NEW JAKARTA relies on the cooperation between us at X ACADEMY and THE OVERSEERS. You have my continued and advance gratitude.”

000111311 - - HAVE you BEEN TESTED FOR ANY TRACES OF SIGHIR? HAVE your TESTS ON THE VIRUSES COME BACK CLEAN? - 0012133

There was nothing to hide. He couldn’t hide. His upbringing, his rise to corporate power, hell, even his schedule of daily meetings for the last month was leaked in a tabloid. The X ACADEMY stocks that day were crazy. And it was all by design.

“Of course!” Whether that was in response to only one or both of the questions, he did not specify. “What kind of CEO would I be if I didn’t test our own products? As you may know, in partnership with the government, we are developing new testing techniques as more about the SIGHIR becomes known. It is our hope that we can harness SIGHIR for the good of NEW JAKARTA.”

Santi was now typing into his handheld. “Give me a moment to log into our servers. I want to show you how the latest read out for the test looks like. We think this will revolutionize public health literacy and tackle testing hesitancy. See? Look.” He shared his screen with THE OVERSEER. A profile of his latest test results presented on screen, supposedly taken just the day prior—all clear, in more ways than one. The user interface of X ACADEMY’s latest test result panel was akin to the latest social media platform, clean and compact, easy to understand. “There is still user experience testing to be done, but we’re hoping to propose this new layout to the government in our next joint meeting.”

But this was all a ruse—he, himself, was a ruse; a gambit years in the making. This very identity he presented to the world was something his family had started crafting for him even before he was born. To this end, they had even been fabricating his medical records from the moment he took his first breath. The only thing true about him was that he was the heir to the Amarin-Zhao conglomerate, and as such, a strategic asset. In due time, his status as a SIGHIR would be revealed with the goal of bringing more prominence to the Amarin-Zhao name.

0113114 - - DO you HAVE ANYTHING TO DECLARE? WEAPONS, AUGMENTATIONS, MECHANICAL PARTS OR AI-RELATED APERTURE? - 0012444

“Personally? None.” For tax purposes, all things — weapons, mainly — he could’ve declared were technically property of the family conglomerate, off-shored back on Earth, or hidden in stockpiles in THE SLUMS. It was business principle and white collar crime 101: diversify your portfolio and don’t keep all your eggs in one basket. “But for X ACADEMY-related inquiries, I can get you in touch with our record-keeping department to get you any documentation you need. Just let me know.” 

He was smiling again. “Thank you again, truly, for taking the time to speak today. I appreciate it. Again, feel free to reach back out if you need anything else. If you please excuse me, I have another meeting to get to.” Finally, lunch.

[atlasreign]

i am sorry for the man i become when i look at this man, he makes me SO ILL but anyways. love perception hc under the cut.

Sickening realisation that Rhys is too soft for love. Like, this is a man who yes, put work above everything but is known to love so deeply that it'll make him ill. The fact that he was searching for the girls, romantic or platonic — that love he held for them kept him pushing & pushing, sending out more and more people to look for them.

But yeah. He's too soft for love. Too soft for love, too soft to be loved. RE: love language, how his is so distinctly touch and showing signs of affection through offerings. These display that Rhys is absolutely a Worshipper love type, and this is horrendously detrimental to him and his wellbeing. The fact that he's so quick to forgo sleep to comfort another, or to spend hours trying to find ways he can help them; that's unhealthy.

His understanding of love has been so skewered by how he was treated in the past. How Stacey used his love to benefit her and threw him away when she was done. How he was hopelessly enamoured by the entity that was Jack and the legacy he left in Hyperion, only to be told that he was a means to an end, that his life was to be forfeit. That Jack feigned interest in him just to get a new body. How he had Sasha in his arms, but was so unsure this time around what kind of love it was that he just… Let it die.

He doesn't know how to love properly. If offering his life is right or wrong, if being willing to hurt and be hurt is the answer. He's so incredibly fucked up by it, when I say he's soft, yes he's soft because he can love too much and craves it too much, but I say he's soft because he's also willing to be burned up for it. He barely pushes back. Hell, his response to a love confession is literally to say "you don't have to love me back." As much as he yearns and craves to be loved he's also so acutely aware of his past mistreatments that it's second nature to simply say, don't force yourself to love me, because it'll only hurt me when you're done.

He always thinks he's overbearing, when he feels his presence is too much for someone, he'll take himself out of the equation. Temporarily or permanently. He'll leave spaces and isolate for days to try and balance it out. He's an unhealthy lover because he's so, so willing to sacrifice skin and bone to appease someone.

But on the other side, he is so affectionate, vocal, so emotionally tethered that you'd have no greater partner than him. Someone who adores you, looks at you like you're the sun. Being so utterly blinded by you. You would become all he sees when he looks at joyous elements in the world. He would be there when he's needed, acting as an anchor, emotional support, physical support.. Whatever is needed, he'd be there.

Overall. Though he is too soft to love & be loved, and is at risk of ruin… He will do so with grace, with devotion in his lungs. With a heart that is so loyal, that if it were to be touched by hands other than his beloved's, it would wither. You'd never have someone as loyal as him, so sacrificial.