#How will their world ever forgive them for their rule?

[dapper-lil-arts]

Perks of writing a multiverse fic; I get to put together the most crazy stuff. Demon Sunset wife. Ex-Midnight Twi. And yes they make out

[ssa-dado]

Cat Equals Sign Of Integration

Aaron Hotchner x bau!fem!reader Genre: fluff, smut (implied) Summary: Aaron, ever the strategist, decides that a little wine might help soften the blow of figuring out with you how to tell the team you’re dating. A solid plan - except for one tiny flaw: wine makes him a whore. Warnings: +18, MINORS DNI Hotch is a touch starved whore, a few cuss words here and there, wine gets a bit into both of your heads. Word Count: 5k Dado's Corner: Did I hallucinate this while working on one of the many requests still on my to-do list, only to realize halfway through that it was completely derailing from the main plot - but too cute to abandon? Yes. Is this fun? You tell me (pretty please).

masterlist(s)

One of the many rules you and Aaron had in your relationship was that if you cooked for date night, he was the one doing the dishes.

His idea.

You had been opposed to it at first - not because you minded, of course. You were actually a huge fan of grown men handling household chores without whining like toddlers about how it might somehow demasculate their poor, fragile egos.

No, you were opposed because you didn’t want him doing it out of some sense of obligation.

It took you a while to accept that Aaron wasn’t doing this because he owed you - he was doing it because he wanted to.

Because that was just… Aaron.

Ever the caregiver, always looking for ways to make life easier for the people he loved. He could give you the world and still come to you like a wounded dog, begging for forgiveness because he thought he wasn’t enough.

It was infuriating - for all the deep psychological reasons you could analyze for hours, but also for a much pettier one: when it was his turn to cook, instead of letting you do the dishes like the so-called rule dictated, he just… did them anyway.

And thus, the noble Mr. Clean - brave warrior of dish duty, his arms submerged in treacherous, frothy depths - found himself utterly helpless against the sudden, most dreadful buzzing of his phone.

A cruel twist of fate, indeed!

Stranded, defenseless, bound by duty to his porcelain captors, he could do nothing but stand there, a tragic figure of great importance, cruelly denied his right to immediately bestow his undivided attention upon whatever poor soul dared summon him.

Oh, the agony! The injustice! How swiftly the mighty are humbled… by a sink full of bubbles.

That was because, logically, if even a single drop of water touched his phone, he would instantly lose all of the very important, highly classified FBI secrets stored inside. Of course, phones couldn't possibly be waterproof.

Ha, imagine?! What a concept.

“Who is it?” Aaron asked, still scrubbing at your wine glass like he was trying to erase its entire existence.

Which – by the way - was completely pointless, considering that in less than five minutes, he planned on refilling it with some more. A different wine, yes. But for God’s sake, you weren’t going to die if the last few drops of white mixed with the red.

…What a fussy man.

“Penelope,” you replied, admiring the view.

What a view, really. That man was all legs and no ass, and you were finally learning to appreciate it. 

“Ignore it,” he said, not even turning around.

Unfortunately for him - and for the HR department still blissfully unaware that their most serious, by-the-book boss was fraternizing with a subordinate - you were a profiler.

The U.S. government literally paid your bills every single month because you were exceptionally good at reading people.

And the way he answered? Yeah, that wasn’t the tone of a man casually dismissing an unimportant text. No, that was the tone of a man caught red-handed, scrambling for plausible deniability.

Embarrassed. Secretive. Suspicious. Frankly, if you didn’t already know what he was hiding, you’d be halfway to slapping cuffs on him. Wouldn’t even be the first time.

And so you read it – out loud.

Penelope Garcia, 7:56 PM:

hotch sir hotch bossman sir, i am DYING please tell me if you found out who her mystery boyfriend is i am suffering!!!!!!!! i know you know. i know it in my heart. if you can’t say it just give me a hint. a tiny one. a cryptic riddle. a blink. i will take anything.

^.ᆽ.^= ∫

By her, of course, she meant you - because despite a few months of keeping your relationship under wraps, you still hadn’t gotten around to telling the team. Your colleagues. Your friends. Your unwanted, overly nosy adopted children.

That their elusive "mystery boyfriend" was, in fact, your mutual boss.

You were going to tell them. Eventually.

Didn’t know when. But you would.

Then again, it wasn’t like you were surrounded by some of the best profilers in the country, trained to pick up on the slightest behavioral shift.

It’s not like the second two incredibly touch-starved people like you and Aaron started walking around with even a fraction of happiness, that wouldn’t immediately raise suspicions.

…Except, apparently, it hadn’t.

Because somehow, the team had only managed to land on half the conclusion: you were seeing someone.

But Aaron? Not even a blip on their radar.

It was almost impressive, really. The answer was so obvious that they had discarded it entirely, still wandering around in the dark, trying to piece together a puzzle that was sitting right in front of their faces.

Just like Penelope was doing now, so desperate for some reason that she was straight-up asking him outright - when not that long ago, she still thought twice before even making a dirty joke in his presence.

And so, you got up, walked over to Aaron, and held the phone directly under his nose. “What does this mean?”

He squinted at the screen, then at you. “Oh, honey, I don’t know. She always sends me that - I don’t understand what exactly equals the sign of integration”.

…What?

You were suddenly just as confused as he was.

He blinked at you, eyes wide, eyebrows raised in that utterly sincere, slightly bewildered way of his. “That sign before it,” he said, completely lost. “It looks Chinese. Thought you knew Chinese, sweetheart.”

…What?

Oh, for the love of God.

If this man hadn’t already seen the absolute worst horrors the world had to offer, you would fight for his innocence with your nails, your teeth, and - if absolutely necessary - one of the worst shooting records ever logged in the Bureau.

You looked at the screen again.

^.ᆽ.^= ∫

Oh.

Oh, that’s what had confused him.

“Aaron,” you said gently, doing your absolute best not to kiss him right then and there, “that is a cat.”

You sighed, then pointed at the message again. “By the way, the ‘sign’ in the middle is in Korean, not Chinese.”

He looked at the screen again - then back at you. “…Cat equals sign of integration?”

“No, honey,” you said, barely suppressing your smile, tapping the little text emoji. “It’s just a cat.”

He studied it for another second. “Oh.”

There. That did it. You gave in. Leaned in and pressed a loud smooch to his cheek.

At least your dignity was still intact - he had no idea why you’d done it, just assumed it was one of those spontaneous bursts of affection that came with being hopelessly in love.

Honeymoon phase truly did work wonders.

“Do you think I can have the cat too?” he asked, grabbing the bottle of red and a corkscrew.

That was a trap.

Because Aaron Hotchner still signed every single text he sent.

And while it wasn’t an issue when he was sending something standard -

Lawyer, 6:17 PM:

They found a new body, we’re gathering at the precinct in 30.

A.H.

- it became a lot more unsettling when he sent the filthiest, most depraved things you’d ever read, only to end them with that stiff little A.H. like he was dictating official Bureau correspondence.

Lawyer, 11:51 PM:

Sweetheart, if only these stupid walls weren’t so thin, I’d have you right here with me, bent over, face pressed against this mattress, making you come so many times you’d forget your own name. At least three. Maybe four, if I’m feeling generous.

A.H.

So now, standing in his kitchen, watching him pour wine like he hadn’t just permanently scarred you with his painfully bureaucratic approach to sexting, you knew that if you admitted he could simply copy-paste that ‘cat equals integration sign,’ it would only be a matter of time before you were subjected to something truly traumatizing, like -

Lawyer, very-late-office-hour PM:

It’s your fault I’m getting distracted with the paperwork, because I’m still thinking about how good you tasted last night while sitting on my face. God, I can still feel your thighs shaking, you were so sweet for me, honey, so fucking perfect.

P.S. How many reports do you still have left? Because I’ve been thinking about having you on my tongue again before the night is over. I think I’ve got about an hour or so left but then I’m all yours.

^.ᆽ.^= ∫

A.H.

Yeah. No. Absolutely not.

That man could not be trusted with the cat.

“Oh, honey,” you cooed, pressing a soft kiss between his shoulder blades as your fingers brushed over his back. “I don’t think you can get it. She must have programmed it herself into her phone.”

You truly hoped you were as convincing as he was clueless about text etiquette.

“It’s a pity,” he sighed, both of your wine glasses in hand as he made his way to the couch. “I would have loved to send you the cat.”

…Of course he would. Smug ass.

But as the words left his mouth, something shifted in him - just barely. A pause that didn’t usually belong there... weird.

Still, you followed, watching as he settled in, patting the cushion beside him with a half-smile. “Come here, sweetheart.”

A misleading gesture, considering his legs were very much spread - a much clearer invitation. At least, that’s how you chose to interpret it.

Because you could swear - those legs spoke to you. Called to you. So you slid right into your rightful seat - his lap.

…Would have been rude not to answer.

“Back to Garcia,” he said, resting a hand on your thigh as he handed you your painstakingly polished wine glass - so clean, so immaculately spotless, that the red wine inside looked redder than red. A real masterpiece, Mr. Clean. “She doesn’t seem to be letting up about finding out who you’re dating… This is the fourth message this week.”

You raised a brow, taking a sip of your wine. “Well, she’s second only to you when it comes to being nosy about gossip.”

Aaron exhaled, shaking his head, that same small half-smile back on his lips.

That particular smile.

The one he used when he was trying to convince someone he was fine when, in reality, he was not - when he was trying to reassure everyone else while simultaneously refusing to admit, even to himself, that something was eating him alive.

Oh, now you knew what this was about.

He had definitely practiced this conversation in his head - refined it down to the perfect phrasing. Measured. Logical. Reassuring.

A version so well-rehearsed, so carefully constructed, that he’d convinced himself first before trying to convince you - that this didn’t scare him.

That this was just another rational step forward.

That it was fine.

Because if he could make it sound easy, maybe it would be.

Maybe it would give you something solid to lean on, because the last thing he wanted was for you to feel like you were standing on shaky ground with someone just as fractured as he was.

But in the end, even the best-laid words couldn’t withstand the weight of his emotions - whether he liked it or not, even rocks are meant to erode.

“I think it’s time we come clean to the team,” he admitted, completely veering off-script - though, of course, he still made sure to soften the blow with a kiss to your temple.

Not that it made much difference. You both knew this moment was inevitable, but somehow, you’d managed to delude yourselves into thinking that if you just kept putting it off, the perfect time would miraculously appear.

At first, you’d delayed it until things were official.

Then, because you needed to be sure this could work in the long run.

Then, because you wanted time to just enjoy each other.

Truthfully? If it were entirely up to the two of you, you’d probably keep postponing it indefinitely - at least until the day you were both retired, far away from any fraternization rules or painfully awkward team dynamics.

Unless, of course, your eyes had been deceiving you all along, or life decided to be cruel and rip this happiness away from you before you ever even got the chance. All you could do was hope not.

Aaron sighed, watching you carefully. “So, how do you want to do this?”

At least he could take comfort in the fact that his very specific plan of having wine while discussing this was still intact - especially since the very large sip you took the second he asked hadn’t gone unnoticed.

He huffed a laugh.

Yeah.

This was going to be fun.

“Are we sure we have to?” You groaned, tilting your head back against his shoulder.

“I’m afraid so, sweetheart. It’s the only way to keep them from getting the satisfaction of figuring it out first and do this our way…”

It was his turn to take a long sip now… he surely wasn’t thrilled about the lack of an actual game plan.

“…Still need to figure out what exactly we mean by ‘our way,’” he admitted. “But, you know… that’s what these are for.”

He tapped a finger against his temple, then against yours, clearly implying that your very skilled, highly trained profiler brains would surely work this out.

You, however, were placing your bets on your problem-solving skills drastically improving after a few more glasses of wine, because right now?

“We are so fucked,” you commented.

Aaron clinked his glass against yours, deadpan. “Completely.”

You both took long, slow sips of wine like it might somehow provide divine intervention.

It didn’t. You were indeed left pretty much alone in this.

You sighed, setting your glass down on the coffee table. “Well, you definitely have the face of someone who already has a plan...” You reached up, brushing your fingers along his jaw. “...a very handsome face.”

Cheesy. But deserved.

Aaron chuckled. “I believe…” He kissed you on the cheek – twice - before setting his own glass down too. “…We should tell them directly. Get ahead of it. Lay it out as matter-of-factly as possible.”

“Matter-of-factly?”

He nodded, all serious, like he hadn’t just suggested the worst possible approach.

“Sweetheart…” You pinched his cheek, making him scrunch his nose, hoping – more like praying - that it would snap him out of whatever fantasy land of logic, reason, and good intentions he was apparently living in.

“If we tell them directly, Penelope will throw an actual partypersonally design matching t-shirts, and have the entire team wear them.” You paused, leveling him with a look. “And you know it wouldn’t be the first time.”

“I know.”

“Emily and Derek will immediately start making jokes like two middle schoolers who just learned what sex is and will not let us breathe.”

“I know.”

“JJ will be quiet but then ask all of a sudden, ‘So when’s the wedding?’ which will restart the chaos all over again.”

“I know.”

You turned to face him, deadly serious. “Spencer-”

“-Will hit us with a full statistical analysis of workplace relationships,” Aaron finished, exhaling sharply, already bracing himself.

Because there was only one team member left to account for - the worst of them all.

“And… oh God… Dave…”

And with that horrifying realization, he did the only logical thing a man in his position could do - he face-planted directly into your chest with a dramatic, muffled groan of pure defeat.

You blinked down at him, amused. “Honey…”

Why was he even so touch starved like that?

“All I ask,” came his muffled voice, still very much nestled between your breasts, “is five minutes of peace.”

You snorted. “You do realize this isn’t exactly discouraging me from making fun of you, right?”

He sighed again. “You do realize that if you keep laughing, you’re just shoving them further into my face?”

…Damn him and his irritating ability to state the obvious.

You sighed, fingers absentmindedly combing through his short spikes of hair. “…So we’re back to square one.”

Aaron exhaled, still very much face-first in his chosen safe haven. “Unfortunately.”

You hummed, “Okay, hypothetically, if we just… never tell them, how long do you think we could get away with it?”

That was so absurd that it actually made him lift his head. He blinked at you, utterly offended by the suggestion.

“I am not spending the next decade pretending I don’t stare at your ass every time you walk away.”

…Alright. That was definitely the wine talking.

In vino veritas, as the Romans said. Wine makes people say dumb shit: the truth.

“Wow. Didn’t know you were a poet, Hotchner.”

His lips twitched. “Don’t pretend you’re above it, because I catch you every time you drift off during briefings just to stare right at-”

“Alright, alright,” you cut him off, slapping a hand over his mouth before he could fully call you out... he was not happy about it. “We’re both shameless…"

You needed an exit strategy. Fast.

You reached for his wine glass over the coffee table. “Well, at least the bright side of telling them is that we won’t have to schedule our coffee breaks in advance anymore and pretend to look surprised when we see each other.”

And all of that was just for one single moment.

The fleeting brush of fingertips as you handed him the cup you always poured for him.

The way his hand was always warmer than yours, despite the fact that you were the one holding the scalding mug, as if basic thermodynamics simply did not apply to Aaron Hotchner.

And if it was one of those days, sometimes, there’d be a little extra something.

A longer touch.

Eye contact that lingered just a second too long.

A slow sip from his cup while still holding your gaze, and suddenly, it felt indecent - like something you definitely shouldn’t be doing in broad daylight, let alone in a federal building.

And now - here, in the comfort of his apartment, with nothing and no one to stop you - he reached for the wine glass you were offering, except… he wasn’t actually reaching for the glass.

He was just holding your hand.

Aaron chuckled, his thumb tracing lazy circles over your knuckles. “I think we’re holding onto this touch just a little too long,” he murmured, nuzzling into you, his breath warm against your ear. “Might start looking suspicious.”

Didn’t he knew exactly what he was doing.

“Oh, also some-” you started, or at least tried to, because as if everything else wasn’t enough, now he was kissing just behind your ear, his lips just brushing the sensitive skin there, warm, and slow, and wet and… God…

Okay. Okay.

Maybe it was the wine.

Maybe it was the fact that you were always kind of a little bit obsessed with him.

Either way, the result was the same: you really, really wanted him right now.

You sighed, tilting your head to grant him a little more access - but not too much, or you might actually end up using the full length of his three-seater couch instead of stubbornly remaining curled up in the same cramped two-foot space you’d unofficially claimed as your own. Ergo - going horizontal with him instead of just being seated on his lap.

“I thought we were having a serious discussion,” you murmured, though the breathy edge to your voice wasn’t exactly helping your case.

Aaron hummed in response, slowly dragging his lips from behind your ear down along the curve of your jaw, pressing a kiss at the hinge. “We are.” Another kiss. “What were you starting to say, sweetheart?”

And another one.

You tried to think. Really, you did.

But it was getting increasingly difficult with his mouth still very much on your skin, moving towards places that were making it exponentially harder to form coherent thoughts.

You would’ve made a mental note to never wear anything that resembled a tank top around him again, if only you had the actual brain capacity to form any notes right now.

“Aaron-”

Aaron smirked against your skin. “You were saying?”

…Blank. Absolutely blank.

Your brain stalled for a solid three seconds before mercifully rebooting.

“I-” You licked your lips, cleared your throat. “Penelope.”

That, thankfully, was enough of a keyword to get him to back off - though, the second he did, you already desperately missed the warmth of his mouth on your skin.

He tilted his head, “Penelope?”

You swallowed. “She’s… gonna be beaming.”

Aaron blinked at you. “Beaming.”

“Yeah.” You smiled, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek, because God, he was too cute when he was confused like this. “Her and Kevin have been desperate for another couple to go out with. Ever since JJ and Will stopped leaving the house because they’re too busy baby-proofing every square inch of their lives.”

Aaron’s brows furrowed slightly. “And by ‘go out with,’ you mean double dates.”

You hummed, fingers grazing his cheek. “Mmm. Yeah. Double dates.”

Aaron didn’t even hesitate. “Oh, absolutely not.”

You blinked, pulling back slightly. “Wait, what?”

His face was resolute. “I’m not doing double dates.”

You squinted at him. “Okay, but why?”

And that’s how you learned that if there was one thing your boyfriend hated - more than messy paperwork, more than delayed flights, more than the Bureau’s budgeting meetings - it was double dates.

Not specifically with Penelope and Kevin. God, no. He was practically the puppet master of their relationship in the first place. Just… double dates in general.

“They’re impractical,” he said.

You snorted. “What do you mean?”

Aaron sighed. “They are a waste of time. You sit there, and for the first fifteen minutes, it’s fine. The usual small talk, polite conversation…”

You nodded, barely biting back a grin. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”

Honestly, this just sounded like some classic Aaron Hotchner being the most adorable introvert to ever exist.

He shot you a look, deadly serious. “It’s a trap.” You nearly cooed. Adorable. “Because at some point, you end up talking one-on-one with someone from the other couple. And right when the conversation is actually getting interesting-”

He suddenly paused.

His hand started at your shoulder, innocent enough - until it wasn’t, until it drifted lower, fingertips skimming down until they found your thigh, before sliding inward, squeezing your soft flesh there.

“See?” Aaron murmured, voice deceptively casual. “It starts off innocently. A hand on the shoulder…”He angled his fingers just a notch further up your upper thigh. “…Then the thigh. Then-”

He leaned in, kissing you just at the corner of your mouth.

"A little kiss here," he murmured, lips barely brushing your skin.

Then another - softer, lingering just at the very edge of your lips.

"A little peck there."

Okay.

Ahem.

For a man who hated double dates, he was making a very strong case for them.

This was clearly foreplay.

Had to be foreplay.

You chose to interpret it as foreplay.

So, naturally, just as you were about to pull him in properly - to finally taste the wine on his lips – he pulled back.

Mixed signals whore.

“And then,” he continued, and you swore his voice had gotten even lower - sluttier, if you were being honest - "it escalates.”

...Wine-induced yapper. "Because one couple decides a little peck isn’t enough, so they turn and start devouring each other’s faces… in public.”

The wine that was in your system, instead, suggested you should have him biblically, right here, right now, on his couch.

“Care to demonstrate this part too?” You licked your lips, tilting your head.

Aaron sighed “Honey.” You knew you were in trouble the moment he smirked. “You’re demonstrating my point…”

Your stomach dropped.

“…You want more.” Aaron tutted, shaking his head, feigning disappointment. “Of course you want more. A chaste kiss isn’t enough. How could it be, sweetheart?”

Hell yes you wanted more.

Badly.

You might have even nodded without meaning to.

“But imagine if this was happening in public. In front of two other people. What about them?” he murmured, tilting his head, voice dropping into something dark, silky, dangerous. “In front of two other people.”

You swallowed, very much not thinking about them right now.

“Because at that point, they only have two choices: they either sit there - third-wheeling, watching - or…” His hand slid beneath your shirt, fingers splaying wide over your bare waist, gripping, pulling you that much closer. "… they start doing it too."

Your breath hitched. “Aaron-”

"With just a kiss, it creates an environment," he murmured, lips grazing the shell of your ear, "where both couples get competitive. Where they start copying each other - but making it more…"

He dragged his nose along the curve of your jaw, the ghost of his lips tracing just behind it. "Passionate."

A teeth-grazing kiss against your pulse.

A slow drag of his lips down the column of your throat, before he made his way back up, tilting your chin up with his fingers just so, forcing you to look at him.

And God, that look.

"More tongue," he continued, letting you see it first - his own darting out, wetting his lips just before he brushed them over yours.

Not kissing.

Not yet.

“More biting.” Aaron caught your lower lip between his teeth, pulling just enough to confirm what you already knew -

He tasted like red wine.

Rich. Dark. Addictive.

And so did you.

“More touching.” His hand drifted, fingertips just skimming over your ribs, teasing along the underside of your breast - so close, so close, before he let it trail lower again, just as his lips ghosted over your ear.

"More sounds."

You barely bit back the breathy, desperate little moan clawing its way up your throat because -

Aaron shoved you off his lap.

In one fluid motion, he shifted, pressing you back into the couch, caging you in beneath him, his arms bracketing either side of your head.

His knee slotted between your thighs, pressing up just slightly - just enough to make you gasp, make your hips twitch without thinking.

You were pretty sure now that this was, in fact, foreplay.

“At that point,” he murmured, lowering himself, pressing his body against yours, pinning you down with nothing but his weight, “if you’re already getting ideas…”

Aaron rolled his hips against you, his knee shifting just enough to have you sucking in a sharp breath. “…it’s better off just staying home. Because at least then,” he whispered, “we can do this.”

And then he kissed you. Properly.

Deep and hungry, pressing you down into the cushions until you moaned into his mouth, pulling him closer as one of his hands slipped under your shirt.

“You-” you swallowed, trying to find words, but he stole them from you, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to your jaw. “You expect me to believe this is why you hate double dates?”

“I expect you to understand,” he murmured against the sensitive skin of your neck, “that if I ever go on one…” he nipped at your pulse, making you gasp. “…I’ll be thinking about this the entire time.”

Then - click.

The sound of the button of your pants being undone, followed shortly by the hiss of your zipper. You felt the warmth of his fingertips slipping beneath the waistband of your pants, resting over your hip bone.

Well, fuck.

“You’ll be sitting across from me,” he continued, voice so unfairly composed, so infuriatingly smooth, “pretending to listen to whatever they’re taking about.”

He tilted his head, kissing along your collarbone, then much lower. You made a mental note to always wear anything resembling a tank top in his presence from now on.

“And the entire time…” his fingers dipped just slightly beneath the elastic of your underwear.

You shuddered. “Aaron.”

He hummed, pleased - so deeply pleased - before finally sliding lower, his fingers finally brushing right where you needed him most.

You whimpered.

“I’ll be remembering,” he murmured, “exactly how you sound right now.”

Your back arched into his touch, fingers digging into his shoulders, nails biting into muscle as his fingers moved.

“And how you look,” he added, his lips brushing the curve of your breast, “when you fall apart for me.”

Your breath hitched-

And then.

Then-

He stopped.

Just - stopped.

His hands left you completely as he leaned back, settling onto his knees above you, looking far too pleased with himself.

You gaped at him, betrayed. “Are you kidding me?”

Aaron just smirked, gaze flicking over you, taking in your flushed cheeks, your uneven breathing, the way your body was still desperately aching for him.

“See?” he shrugged, voice so damn smug. “This is why I hate double dates.”

How funny would it be if these ended up being his last words?

You huffed, adjusting yourself on the couch, crossing your arms like you weren’t still ridiculously turned on and very annoyed about it. “Alright, you know what? Fine. No need to suffer through a double date if we just… conveniently wait to tell the team about us until after JJ and Will start going back out with Penelope and Kevin.”

Aaron smirked.

At least you’d both come to an agreement - the exact same procrastination tactic you’d been using, just with a new and improved excuse attached.

“…Smart girl.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Don’t patronize me.”

“I wouldn’t dare, sweetheart.”

You rolled your eyes, still breathing heavily, still so deeply unsatisfied, as Aaron pressed a kiss to your temple, then stood, stretching his arms.

“I’ll clean the wine glasses,” he mused, already heading toward the kitchen. “And then I’ll be back to you.”

You stared at him.

He paused, glancing at you over his shoulder, smirking.

You huffed, sarcastic, “glad we could work this out.”

You were not glad. Not at all. Especially because not even a full minute later, your phone buzzed with a text.

From him.

From Mr. Clean himself, who was currently just a couple rooms away from you.

Lawyer, 8:43 PM:

Sweetheart, I hope you're ready, because I’m going to spread you out on that couch and fuck you so deep, you’ll still feel me when you sit at your desk tomorrow.

^.ᆽ.^= ∫

A.H.

"Garcia just told me how to get the cat," came his voice from the kitchen - so damn smug you could hear the smirk in it, followed the sound of his footsteps getting closer.

Before you could turn, before you could say anything, he was there - leaning in from behind the couch, arms sliding around you, caging you in, whispering into your ear -

"It was just a simple copy-paste."

taglist: @beata1108 ; @c-losur3 ; @fangirlunknown ; @hayleym1234 ; @justyourusualash ; @khxna ; @kyrathekiller ; @lostinwonderland314 ; @mxblobby ; @oxforce ; @percysley ; @person-005 ; @prettybaby-reid ; @reidfile ; @royalestrellas ; @ssa-callahan ; @softestqueeen ; @theseerbetweenus ; @todorokishoe2

[chuxmy]

Stay with me..

Pairings: Geum Seongje x Fem!Reader

Summary: Seongje didn’t answer you for two days so you visit him.

Warnings: none just fluff

You shouldn’t be here.

Every step up the rain slick stairs to his apartment had screamed that fact at you. Every glance over your shoulder, every shadow you imagined following your footsteps, reminded you: you were breaking the one rule he never stopped repeating.

Don’t come to me when it’s quiet. That’s when they watch. If they know about you, they’ll use it.

And yet, you stood there—drenched coat clinging to your skin, heart thudding, rain dripping from your eyelashes as you lifted a trembling hand and rang the doorbell.

For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of the city and your breath.

Then the door opened.

Geum Seongje stood in the doorway, barefoot, hoodie wrinkled, eyes wide and full of so many things at once shock, relief, frustration, and something deeper. His gaze swept over you quickly, jaw tightening when he saw how soaked you were.

“Y/N,” he said, voice low, raw. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“I—I needed to see you,” you said, clutching the strap of your bag with both hands. “You didn’t answer. Not for two days. I thought—”

He stepped forward before you could finish, pulling you into the apartment and closing the door behind you.

“Don’t ever do that again,” he whispered as he brushed wet hair from your face. “Not here. Not like this. You could’ve been followed.”

“I wasn’t,” you murmured. “I was careful.”

Seongje moved away from you, running a hand through his messy hair, tension radiating off him. “Careful isn’t good enough. If they saw you…”

“You didn’t answer,” you repeated, your voice shaking now. “You disappeared. What was I supposed to do? Just wait and wonder if something happened to you? If—if they found out?”

He turned, and this time his expression was different.

Wrecked.

“I didn’t disappear,” he said hoarsely. “I was protecting you. There’s a vote coming up, and people are turning on each other. I can’t risk them knowing what you mean to me.”

You swallowed hard, tears stinging your eyes. “Then why do I still feel like I’m the only one fighting for us?”

That made him stop in his tracks.

His chest rose and fell unevenly. He looked like he’d been holding something in for too long something that wanted to tear out of him.

“Because I’m not allowed to fight for you the way I want to.”

You blinked. “What does that mean?”

He crossed the room in two long strides, stopping just inches from you.

“It means I think about you every second of the day,” he said, voice trembling with restraint. “It means I lose my mind when I can’t check on you. When I can’t call. When I imagine them finding out, and what they’d do to you if they wanted to punish me.”

You were silent.

“I want to be selfish,” he admitted, his voice falling to a whisper. “I want to hold your hand in public. I want to kiss you without checking if someone’s watching. I want to come home to you. But if it means putting a target on your back then I’m the one who’d never forgive myself.”

You looked up at him, eyes wide. “Then why haven’t you let me go?”

His breath caught.

And slowly, his hand came up to touch your cheek wet with rain or maybe tears, he couldn’t tell anymore.

“Because I can’t,” he said. “Because I love you too damn much.”

You let out a shaky breath. “Then kiss me.”

His fingers froze, his lips parting slightly in surprise. “Y/N—”

“I don’t care who’s watching. Not right now. Just tonight. Just you and me.”

And that was all it took.

In a heartbeat, his mouth was on yours warm, desperate, familiar. He kissed you like he’d been holding his breath for days, like your lips were the only thing grounding him in a world full of danger and lies. His hands cupped your face gently, but his body pressed closer, stealing your warmth, your heartbeat, your ache.

You melted into him, your hands slipping under the hem of his hoodie to touch the skin of his back, and he let out a soft, broken sound against your lips. It wasn’t rushed, or messy.. it was reverent. Like he was memorizing every second in case he had to let go tomorrow.

When you finally pulled back, your foreheads touched, breaths mingling in the silence.

“Stay,” he whispered, still holding you close. “Just for tonight. Let me forget the rest of the world.”

You nodded, unable to speak past the lump in your throat. “Okay. Just tonight.”

He led you to the couch, pulled a warm blanket around your shoulders, and held you like something precious. You fell asleep in his arms, wrapped in his scent, in his quiet promises.

And even though the world still waited outside with all its dangers, in that moment, he was only yours.

And you were still his.

[velvet4510]

We all knew Rio was Nicky’s other parent but it’s glorious to see it firmly confirmed and so no hater is able to deny it anymore.

And now we can really bask in just how deep and unique the writing is for that final episode.

From conception, Nicky was half-life, half-death.

Death isn’t supposed to create life. It’s a total paradox that explains why Nicky was meant to be stillborn. How could the child of Death live? Agatha becoming pregnant must’ve turned Rio’s world upside down.

Also Rio doesn’t see death as a tragedy. How could she when it’s her job? When it’s the natural order of things? Before meeting Agatha, it never crossed her mind that death could be seen as bad.

But it’s when she fell for a living human, a mortal, that she finally saw what death means for humans. How much pain and fear and grief it brings.

And suddenly here’s Agatha pleading and pleading for her to NOT do her job, to NOT take their child with her. If she does this, she’ll break Agatha’s heart - the antithesis of her understanding of death. Rio suddenly comprehends that as long as Agatha lives on, there’s no way for the three of them to ever be together as a family. No wonder she chokes back tears.

As for Agatha, she only has the living person’s perspective. How could Rio want THEIR child to die? It’s the antithesis of parental instincts to want or allow your child to die. Death or no Death, surely Rio can see why this would be wrong?

Agatha and Rio are looking at the situation through totally different and incompatible lenses.

So out of love for Agatha alone, Rio lets Nicky’s “life” half take over not just for a few hours or days, but SIX WHOLE YEARS.

Then when Rio can’t stretch the rules any longer and she comes for him, Nicky knows her. He does not fear her, or where they are going. How can he, when she is his mother, when she needs him home?

Then Rio pays the price, as Agatha cuts ties with her and wants nothing to do with her anymore.

I also think this explains why Rio is so determined to kill Agatha herself or to let the Salem Seven do it, during the rest of the show. Again, as Death, she doesn’t see death as bad, or a harm, or a pain. If Agatha dies, then Rio can take her to Nicky and they can finally be a family. But Agatha doesn’t want them to be a family together. She still sees what happened as a loss and betrayal that Nicky would never forgive her for - the opposite of how Rio views it.

Ultimately, Agatha makes herself into a ghost who can’t cross over to where Nicky is, and Rio’s dream of her family being together is shattered.

Truly one of the greatest and most profound tragedies in television history, let alone MCU history.

[yandere-wishes]

⭒ㅤׂ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴍʏ ʟɪꜰᴇㅤׂ ⭒

⭒⌒★ Yandere! X-Men x Reader ★⌒⭒

゜。♡ 𝓔𝔁𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓘 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 ♡ ｡ ゜

˚୨♡୧˚Magneto - Erik Lehnsherr | مگنیتو - اریک لنشر 

Techno graces your body in lieu of veins. Wires coiling like arteries should. You use it to mimic him, embody him, be him. His starry-eyed parody. Erik needs you to be more, to be everything he -and everybody else- could never be. You are synthetic and sacred in every way, you are the future he so desperately craves. 

He can't help seeing them when he looks at you. The reverend wraiths of tortured adoration speak to him through your eyes. He sees a bit of everyone inside you, Charles, Raven, Rogue... their faces flashing like holy ghosts. You have too many constellations inside of you, all on the verge of erupting. It keeps him up at night, especially when you're curled up on your side of the bed, asleep and oblivious. 

"You will save us, little one, you will be the savior we have longed for"

He feels the centuries rolling through him, desperately lost, trying to find his way back to a home he never even knew. Maybe that's why he kneels, brushing his lips across your knuckles tracing each vein in hopes that'll lead him back to a place he's only ever seen in his dreams. I'll stay lost, I'll wait for you to find me. He knows you will, you'll do anything for him. He's sure of it. 

Genosha asks for a queen, demands it really. It's funny how these things work. Funny how those who rule the world are so intent on destroying it. Kingdoms aren't built in a day yet they can so easily be toppled in one. In turn, Magento asks you. Who else? It's his one cardinal tenet, you are the savior he could never be. The one his people, your people, need. Erik rolls your name between his lips, relishing as the syllables melt on his tongue. There's a magnetic pull to 'queen' it tastes like a hallowed prayer. "My queen" he whispers in your ear, his tongue sending sparks up the cartilage shell. Magneto pins you to his lap, keeping you tethered to his strong body. His fingers run lines up your hips indulging in your presence. You don't squirm although he suspects you want to. his lips lower, kissing your jugular and savoring the ungainly moan that slips past your pretty lips. "M-Magneto" He's only now realizing you've never called him by his birthname, maybe cause in some way you find it treacherous that he should bear such a human thing. He may see you as salvation, yet you've always gazed at him with the pietistic eyes of a zealous worshipper. 

"Use your power, feel the magnetic pull flowing through you."

"You're overcomplicating it again, master, I just need to command that which I need lifted."

You've always been a rebellious student. The sardonic irony isn't lost on him, Magneto finds it fitting that he should master such an intricate pupil.

He wonders if you can forgive him for the bodies he's scattered in your name. From this far up he doubts you notice the broken bodies littering the concrete. He'll do it all again, anything to keep your distractions at bay. His kind needs a leader, not another sanctimonious hero.

You will be their savior.

You will be his queen.

♠️🂱♠️Gambit - Remy Lebeau | گمبیت - رمی لیبو

Remy wonders if the king ever longs to be stacked with the queen. Holding his breath every time the cards are shuffled. Praying that this time, this time for sure, he'll be next to her. Gambit's holding his breath too. There's a lively lilt when you giggle, he wonders if you truly grasp how much he means every word. "Mon Cheri, you know you're the only one for me." It sounds so childish, so jejune and Gambit knows he's too old for school-boy crushes. But he can't help it, he's desperate too, just another aspirant king vying for the attention of his red queen. 

You once told him the blacks of his eyes remind you of a starry night sky back home. He thinks about that too much. About the sting of your hand on his shoulder and how good it felt sitting crooked in his bones. So that's why an ace surpasses the king. There is only, one who holds power. Maybe it's never been about the queen or the king or the royal house. It's been the Ace all along. Remy only has one heart, he knows he only has one ace too. There was an ace of hearts on your nightstand this morning, you don't recall how it got there. 

Remy's kisses are too explosive, they hold all the weight of a dying star. Yet the force never ceases, it feeds off the detonations only growing stronger, you think you'll be consumed in this kinetic nova he calls love. 

-`X´- Cyclops - Scott Summers | سیکلوپ - سکات سامرز

There's a shutter of loneliness crawling up his spine. He knows you feel it too. Scott bends and breaks under its crushing weight. You've always been there, tangible, solid. You're the living metaphor for a rock in a raging river. He just can't find the right words yet. You can't see his eyes, you can't withstand his power. But you can be there holding his hand through it all. 

'Is this selfishness'? Scott wonders and he kisses you under a dying moon. He's never had anything to call his own, nothing that stayed for long anyway. He's snuffed out his desires his whole life. His place is with the X-men, playing the no-choice hero of a thankless story. But you, you're still here, you never left. Even now you stand still as his lips taint yours. He feels your fear, undue thing that it is. But he can't let you go not when everything is always marred in endless red monochrome and melancholy. Not when the only blessing the universe had ever given him comes in the shape of you. He's so tired of only ever knowing the life of a perfect toy soldier. 'Stay' he begs you between each kiss, each touch. Please just stay. Ease his pain.

 

☽✭☾ Wolverine - Logan Howlett | ولورین - لوگان هاولت

He's been alive longer than he cares to count. Running from one hell to another. He remembers your ghost, essence weaving between places too blurred to be graced with a name. But he remembers you, he swears he does. It's just that time is so fickle and so few can withstand its crushing tides. 

"How have you been, Logan?" 

"I..ah... fine, just fine." 

When he looks at you he can't believe the changes. There's no trace of the rosy cheecked little girl who used to chase demons in the snowbanks. Playing hide and seek with every stray in the neighborhood. That's good, he thinks, he likes this refined dignitary better, somehow it brings out your eyes. There's a feral gaze when he looks at you, he thought he was over that. He feels the pulsing of his heart reverberate through his claws. It brings back something less than memories, something nostalgic, yet all so distant it may as well have been the sent of his childhood home. It's not right he thinks, as his claws trace your curves trying to feel something he knows is lost. You quiver, trying to make yourself smaller and he knows, he knows he shouldn't do this. But there are just so many pieces missing and he's never tried to look for any of them. Maybe just this once he can delude himself into remembering. 

˚ʚ★ɞ˚ Nightcrawler - Kurt Wagner | شب خزنده - کورت واگنر

Not too long ago this used to be fine. He's always been better within shadows, letting the soft dark weave around his body. Obscurity has always felt like a second home, a haven in everything but consistency. You speak in italics, talking and talking without understanding what he shoulders. If he didn't deem it blasphemy, Kurt would gladly dub himself Eros.

You would be Psyche. Oblivious, sweet Psyche.

Kurt longs to kiss your cheek, he knows it'll only starve him for more. He wonders how soft your hands will feel. If you'll You cradle his face nails tracing the sharp point of his ears, his fangs, the jagged scar he got from dreaming of you in the danger room. Will you grace him with a kiss? Something to relinquish the anguish stirring within. This should be fine, you're talking to him, laughing with him as he remains hidden within the dark. And yet how can he see this as anything less than retribution? You're so close, just a breath away. If only he could reach out and...

۵𓋹۵ Apocalypse - En Sabah Nur | آ��آکلپژ- ان صباح نور

Your heartbeat sounds all too familiar. He used to hear it a thousandfold walking down the Bazaar's street. It's dead now, the noise, the rapture, the music. He wonders what went right for your heart to beat to such a lost tune?  He remembers once hearing that pain travels through families until it lands on the right generation. He's glad fate picked you. He's glad you share the same ancient burdens.

He puts the stars in the sky.

You've been warned against worshipping false idols so blindly.

Yet how can one not fall at his feet?

He who makes the earth tremble and mighty cower. 

He who seems to know everything you do not. 

Your fingers thread through his hair. It's too black, like staring at a moonless sky in December. You wonder if the eternal ebony is what gives Apocolypse his cynical edge. He laughs at the comment as he melts into your familiar touch."Thank you" he mutters. His pride laces every word twisting them into something metaphysical. Nur wonders if you catch the true sentiment behind the words. If the sand and stars make it through. 

You're too archaic for this time Nur thinks as he watches you run across the fields. The other mutants are there, persistent in the games you all play. In his time he'd have already declared you his wife. Do you know the ancient ceremonies? Would you have gifted him gold or flesh? The yearning builds in his throat. Maybe he should have stayed dead. 

Apocolypse lingers the days away in your room, plotting, scheming. You keep him hidden like a blood secret. He's the only one who seems to understand where your power comes from, where you come from. " I could win against you...someday" Your fingers glow igniting a forgotten glow, Nur can't help but laugh as he traces the curve of your spine. " I don't doubt you could, beloved." His blue lips are on the length of your neck. Everything about you screams dead nostalgia. You've followed him through lifetimes. Smiling as you dragged him across the sand dunes just to watch the sunset. How he longs to carve you open and feel your heart between his teeth. 

He's choking on sand.

Drowning in stardust.

Nur feels like he's swallowed the sun whole. Devoured Ra and spat out his holy bones. He still feels the sting of its rays seeping through his teeth. He's divinity and desperation are all in the same breath. Apocalypse and Nur are just two sides of the same daric. You stand in front of him, tracing the blues of his face, kissing the reds of his eyes. An excavation into the lost, unearthing that which could collapse the world. You enjoy him, savor him, keeping his gold essence on your tongue locked behind rose-tinted lips. You beg Nur to dig through your bones, open you up, unseal every crypt. He obliges, kissing the hollow of your bones until his teeth graze your unsteady heart.

"And what will you do once you meet the real world?"

"Oh, nothing, the real world will have to meet me first."

There is so much blood, he doesn't remember doing this. You stand beside him watching the sand in the hourglass run out. He is Apocolypse bringer of destruction, the end of worlds, funny how he needed you, frail sweet thing that you are, to remind him of this. It's only when he looks at you, really really looks at you that he realizes how many things are still the same. Twisted deformed yet still they harbor their old shapes. Apocolypse kisses you under the shade of a palm tree hoping it'll mean something in the end.

Hoping everything can just go back. 

[michellesneptune]

HOW THE MOON SIGNS ACT WHEN THEY LOVE YOU pt. 1

disclaimer: forgive me if the series doesn’t cover all twelve signs, but i don’t think i’ve known enough people to speak about everyone’s way of loving. please be patient🤗

aries moon/1H

ooooh those little devils🔥😈 you can see the mischievous twinkle in their eyes. they’re children of Ares - the god of war! when they speak of their loved ones it feels as though they’re ready to kill for them any minute, only waiting for the right (or any😂) reason.

(just my observation, please don’t come at me) i believe that these natives are prone to being more loyal, less selfish and flaky than aries venus. aries is known to be 'the baby' of the zodiac, valuing independence and self-fulfilment greatly. however, i’ve noticed aries moons to be devoted af!! you will never catch them bad mouthing a friend or a partner.

also, from my experience, both placements like to fight, however aries venus often does it for own enjoyment, the initial chase turns them on. as for aries moons, they’re more steady. they would go to great lengths for friends and partners. you can call them in the middle of the night and ask the craziest favor, they WILL come and help.

(please keep in mind that i mean unevolved aries venuses that still have a lesson or two to learn!)

PS. they love to be treated like the center of your world, please give them attention💕

taurus moon/2H

hmmmm how do i put it… 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍! i will say that i am biased bc my boyfriend is one and the way he’s attentive, always asks about the details of my day, pays attention to my routines and shows love through acts of service🥹 you’ve probably heard the rumours and they’re true. taurus moons make the best cooks ever. and i don’t mean putting together a couple of cheap pancakes, nuh uh. their sharp senses only let them buy the best quality ingredients and cook with great care. bonus points if they prepare a dish that they know is your favourite!

i will say though, they are not the most verbal lovers. but when they’re in, they mean it. when they say they love you, it becomes a fact so obvious that they don’t feel the need to repeat it over and over. they like to settle into a routine, so don’t expect them to be flaky, send mixed signals and stir things up just to feel something/for fun (sag moons cough cough😅😅).

they also seem brutal sometimes. but i believe it’s because they see honesty as the highest form of trust. they want to feel comfortable with you. they value silence, too. they’re the type to show you their appreciation not by telling you how perfect you are but by actually putting in the work to show you your value and show that they’re worthy of being by your side.

lastly, their homes are their sanctuaries, a reflection of their feelings. usually beautiful and they look for someone worthy of letting in, to match their belongings. they get a rep for being possessive and stubborn, nevertheless with the right person they can make a sacrifice and at least try to change their ways😂😂

virgo moon/6H

okay so i know they’re said to be critical, demanding, neurotic etc but hear me out. virgo is a mutable sign, ruled by mercury and in true mutable fashion they DO get wild, fun and unhinged lol. as a virgo moon myself i am well aware of the fact that i often act like i’ve got a stick up my ass. but when i get closer to you i want it all: karaoke nights, fast car rides, spontaneous trips! sometimes i even take those things to the extreme!

they’re also said to have the highest standards. and while i imagine it’s partly true, i believe that this placement is all about accepting the biggest, weirdest quirks of your s/o (as well as 6th house synastry!).

besides, i think that we get more so insecure and self-critical in relationships, analyzing the f outta our partners, wondering whether we’re meeting their demands! we’re about the overall quality of the partnership and just want it to be perfect🥺 we’re also quite anxious and require lots of reassurance.

lastly, everyone knows it: virgo moons are like the final boss of small acts of service lol. vacuuming your flat, folding your clothes. they notice the smallest things that could improve your life and happily do them for you!

capricorn moon/10H

this one is tricky. they remind me a bit of taurus but more rough in a sense that they probably won’t pamper you with luxurious baths and gourmet food but they will do things like pay your rent, get you a job or buy a car😂. i’ve noticed them to be a bit grumpy sometimes, definitely not the softest lovers.

they’re up to giving some tough love. pushing you into a scary path that they know will be rewarding in the end. teaching you that even in the hardest lessons of saturn there is light. they’re not the most cheerful on a daily basis but - surprisingly- they are the ones that keep calm in the face of crises. they’re like okay we can’t do anything about it now let’s appreciate what we do have and focus on what we can change.

it’s because they know all to well how karma is. they had to learn it the hard way which made them so strong and resilient.

what i’ve personally noticed: they will stick by your side no. matter. what. this isn’t always a good thing as sometimes it’s best to walk away but if you’re expecting a cap moon to give up on you, don’t.

i also feel like they’re used to being the oldest sibling, the mom friend etc. please take care of them from time to time!

that is all i have for you! thank you for reading💕 i wish all of you lots and lots of love💋 see ya

~Michelle

[mcflymemes]

AS SAID BY ASTARION ANCUNÍN *  assorted dialogue from baldur's gate 3

you are mine. no one can change that.

i wish... to drink. and be drunk.

you haven't earned the right to stare at me like that.

you could scream bloody murder out here and no one would ever know.

we should find a tavern and celebrate.

do my eyes deceive me? the gang really is all here.

i'd rather be the only dark power inside your body, if it's all the same to you.

you're cute, you know. in another life we might have been friends.

i don't hate you. because this is not you.

we just have to be vigilant. keep our wits about us.

you can try, but i will stop you.

do what you like. it's none of my concern.

i simply do not care.

we could do it, you know. we could rule the world.

i... i don't know what to say. thank you.

well that's just disgusting.

listen to me, damn it! i'm trying to save you, even if you're too stupid to see it.

believe what you want. i'm done with you.

you have no idea what i can do.

sounds like a delightful dinner plan. perhaps i'll join you.

forgiveness? you've never forgiven anything.

i don't need anyone to speak for me.

i don't owe you a damn thing.

don't worry. i'll keep watch tonight.

just don't ask me again.

is there anything else? any new and interesting ways you can waste my time?

i'll come to you tonight, when you're snugly wrapped in your bedroll and we can have a little privacy.

this time i'll make sure i'm quiet.

you're lucky i'm such an open-minded person.

why send anyone after me? i'm hardly a threat out here.

what are you waiting for? help me!

"you can do whatever you want" sounds terrifying, and it is, but there's opportunity in it, too.

i am so much more than what you made me.

hold very, very still.

i'm sorry, but could you excuse us a moment?

get out of my way. i'm in no mood to talk.

you didn't think i could do it? i'm hurt.

i appreciate your loyalty, darling, but i don't think you understand.

fair? nothing about this is fair.

i don't know who they are, but i have plenty of questions.

i'm glad to hear it.

i do believe you. i know you only did what you thought was best for me.

i just need some time to let it sink in.

you're so good to me.

safe? how can i ever be safe now?

well, hello. looking for a cuddle?

now that you're back with us, we need to have a talk.

how flattering. and disturbing.

please tell me this is important.

there's also gold, sex, revenge... quite the list, really. but failing any of those, i will always settle for shallow praise.

now just tell me i'm beautiful and we can call it a day.

i want to thank you.

you're a vision. and you're so much more than that.

this is all a game to you, isn't it?

for as long as i can remember, i've been used by others.

of course i was attracted to you. look at you, for goodness' sake!

i will forever remember what you did for me today.

that's what you've been waiting to hear, isn't it? that's what you want?

i have been waiting so long for you.

come, give yourself to me.

i'll take care of everything.

it's time to try living again.

i feel safe with you. seen.

we don't have to rush into anything tonight.

would it kill you to dispense a compliment?

looking for something?

honestly, you have no sense of fun.

i do appreciate your enthusiasm, but let's try to restrain ourselves a little.

would you like a tour? we can start with my tent, if you like.

everything was taken from me, too.

well, that could have gone better.

i don't know what you mean.

were you actually worried i was angry?

so what was it like? tell me everything.

i hope i'm not interrupting.

some day that soft heart of yours is going to be torn out of your chest.

what a party. we should do this again.

there you are. i've been waiting. waiting since the moment i set eyes on you. waiting to have you.

you've seen enough already.

i didn't want to lose control.

oh, don't be like that. not every problem has to be beaten to death, my dear.

wait! don't interrupt them!

let's not make trouble for some stranger.

my, this place is fun.

my past isn't exactly a happy story.

that was amazing.

it won't happen again. you have my word.

so many people need killing.

remember who saved you.

don't worry. i'm here.

[marycorcaroli]

one piece boys as boyfriends.

luffy, zoro, usopp, sanji, buggy.

req ♡: Can I request the one piece boys as boyfriends/ dating them headcanons?

mary ♡: thanks for the request and hope you like it ! english is not my first language, i apologize for any mistakes.

rules ; masterlist.

luffy.

— luffy is the sweetest guy ever ! i'm sure he will live up to all your expectations and be the best of the best.

— he's a little awkward around you :( but he's also very loud ! ! he wants the whole world to hear that you're his girlfriend ! !

— he is not the jealous type at all. luffy trusts you with his whole heart and soul, he knows that you will never cheat or betray him and neither will he ever hurt you. you have guy friends and luffy trusts them! he hangs out with them and is not afraid that they will take you away from him. he is fine as long as your friends don't harass you or make cruel jokes about you.

— luffy loves hugs more than anything else! the way you give him your warmth and share that intimate moment with him is all luffy needs. he loves to hug at all hours of the day and night, his arms will always be around you!

— he loves kissing you just as much! he kisses you on the tip of your nose when he goes out and on your forehead so you know he's there for you and won't leave you. he kisses behind your ear when you dance together. he kisses your moles or freckles because they're your specialty and he loves them ♡ !

— ! he's a terrible cook ! he'd rather burn down your kitchen and all the equipment and then make puppy dog eyes: "i'm sorry, please, i wanted to please you, but it didn't work out..." don't yell at him 👊

— sleeps like a baby and holds you close to him so you don't run away.

— goes to the bathroom with you because he thinks a monster will take you (he can't watch horror movies).

— gives you presents at the most unexpected times !

— his love languages are touch and words ! he can't take his hands off you and stop saying words of everlasting love.

— luffy is crazy about your smile :( the way your eyes shine and the dimples on your cheeks don't go away makes his heart flutter like it's your first date.

— doesn't like to fight with you ;( even if you have an argument he will try to settle it right away so you go to bed calm, but if it doesn't work out and you go somewhere else.... his heart breaks into little pieces, the fact that it's so bad that you left 😐 will apologize to you a few million times and will do anything to make you forgive him!

zoro.

— the most needy boy :( he needs you to hug him and hold him several times in a second while he inhales the smell of your hair and draws constellations on your back with his hands.

— that's why his love language is always touching.

— he arranges the most incredible dates for you! he chooses the places himself and afterwards invites you on this little journey where he will propose marriage to you.

— for some people marriage is just a stamp in the passport and rings, but for zoro it's a whole life, so he bound your hearts and souls into one, made tearful vows to you, promising to always be there for you in sorrow and in joy.

— hugs are part of his routine. he hugs you every chance he gets. his favorite is the back hug when you're cooking something and zoro dances a little and sings your favorite song.

— kisses you on the lips in the most tender way to convey his feelings. on the eyelids to give you support and on the cheeks to show you how cute you are.

— he snores like a baby but will wake up as soon as you try to get up, he's used to sleeping with you and snuggling up to you that he won't sleep without you.

— he's a little spoon ! !

— loves to go shopping with you and buy something interesting for your home.

— during arguments, when he can't hear you and makes you talk even louder, and the situation in your house gets heated - he just walks away, leaving you alone. later, of course, he will beg for forgiveness and kiss you, and promise that it won't happen again, it's true. he doesn't want your beautiful and clean place to turn into a dumping ground for quarrels and humiliation.

— jealous often, but he doesn't make scandals, but just stands by you like a guard until your admirer runs away.

usopp.

— he's so cute ! you want to kiss his cheeks forever and look into those eyes that show endless love for you.

— he climbs into your room through the window, like in the most romantic movies, without fail ! with flowers in his teeth, "did you miss me?"

— his love language is giving you presents and jumping in puddles while it's raining ! ! !

— he loves to lay on you and squeeze you so hard ! he just wants to show you how much he loves you. for usopp, hugging is something normal, he is tactile himself, but with you, it's magnified several times ! ! he is not afraid to be real with you and he shows everything he has.

— we're not done talking about hugs yet ! another one of usopp's favorite hugs is after a hard day of hardly seeing each other and now you're trying to support each other, for him these moments are the saddest, he'll even cry a little because he couldn't give you a minute all day long ;( my boy.

— kisses too hot! his lips are on yours in seconds and his palms on your neck are clenched while your brain is trying to understand what's going on.

— but he also loves sweet kisses, where you kiss him on the cheek and tell him how cute he is.

— sleeping on you ! you can't get up, so you have to literally throw him off you, "wtf? usopp? i can't breathe, get off 😐."

— he likes to watch comedies and ask every minute about what's gonna happen next.

— there is no room for arguments in your relationship, he will quickly put things into a happy environment and give you his beautiful smiles, but if you do have a problem he will listen to you and do everything in his power to make sure you're okay and not worry about anything.

— he's not jealous at all! why would he be? you're together and you love each other, you know he would never cheat on you and usopp knows you would never do the same, that's why you're fine.

sanji.

— he is such a gentleman ! he opens doors for you all the time, gives you things and does everything to make you feel at ease !

— his love languages are helping each other, supporting you in hard times and spending time together ! all these things are important to sanji as a man who wants to cherish your every moment.

— he loves just holding you close to you and kissing your neck while goosebumps run through your body. sanji also likes hugs where he pats your back and soothes you, hugs where sanji tosses you up and hears your most beautiful laugh.

— he likes to embarrass you so much! to see you blush and cover your face with your hands while sanji mocks and comes over to you ready to destroy you with a tickle.

— he cooks for you all the time, and it's delicious, he loves to surprise you with his new recipes, he doesn't mind if you help him with the cooking, which then turns into a game of survival.

— sanji is crazy about the unexpected kisses from you, he's just sitting there reading a magazine as you come up and give him the most sensual kiss in the world, but he doesn't mind the air kisses where he puts all his desire to kiss you.

— will watch your favorite shows with you, he doesn't care what it is, as long as you like it, he likes it.

— he's a little spoon! he loves it when your nose is against his back and your palms are stroking his chest, sanji gets so calm and he sleeps the most beautiful sleep ;(

— sanji is sometimes unbearable and it hinders your relationship, he likes it when you get angry and show your temper, but he won't let it go too far, you are his favorite, so sanji doesn't really want you to lose your nerve cells completely.

— he can only be jealous sometimes, but then he remembers that you're still his and he doesn't have to worry.

buggy.

— the most charismatic guy in the world ! flirts with you 24/7 and he is not ashamed. he will make you as red as a tomato and then kiss you on the corner of your mouth.

— loves the hottest kisses when you run out of air but you don't want to let go of each other. will lose his head if you kiss his shoulder or earlobe, BUgGY DoN'T BreAthe ! ! your lips are so airy but leave the wettest kisses.

— jealous quite a lot :( he trusts you completely, but doesn't trust the other people who want to take you away from him. even if you have been in a relationship for a long time, buggy is still afraid that you will find a better person than him.

— big spoon ! loves to hold you tight and smell you ! wakes up several times during the night to make sure you are near, even if he still has a dead grip on you.

— likes to take long walks with you and give you the most delicious drinks.

— he's not the best cook, but he'll learn to cook and get a michelin star for you.

— he doesn't think what he says, and when he realizes it, it's too late. he may accidentally tell you everything he thinks, and then he will kneel down and beg you to take him back. you are the most precious thing in his life and if he loses you, buggy will lose his air and the meaning of life.

— he likes to watch soap operas! absolutely any kind, there is no difference, because he likes everything and later he can discuss it all with you.

[tranquilreign]

at arms length II. | mini series

- © tranquilreign - all rights reserved | DO NOT STEAL, TAKE, or COPY any of MY WORK without MY PERMISSION.

🗒 details

pairing; jungkook/reader genre: ex best friends au! college au! warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, alcohol consumption, attempted assault word count: 2.4k tags: @whoa-jo @jungkookie-7 @thelilbutifulthings @foulmoneybathoagie-blog @darklove2020 @llallaaa (I was unsure if those that asked for a part two but didn't say about a tag wanted it, but I still did it nonetheless, I hope that's okay! <3)

🖋 synopsis

arm's-length (adj.) arh·z·length avoiding intimacy or close contact.

he lost everything when he lost you. now he'll do anything to make amends and set things right.

🖇links

jungkook masterlist main masterlist request | request rules prompt list at arms length I.

Jungkook still remembered it like it was yesterday. Watching you walk away, slipping through his fingers. He so desperately wanted to follow you, but he knew you wouldn't listen to him. He had taken you for granted for so long, and now he realised just how much he needed you.

He couldn't sleep properly anymore, often falling asleep during classes. Eating was something that was far from his thoughts. He would pick at his food during break, or would have completely forgotten to bring in lunch.

At first, he ignorantly thought this would be something you'd get over. But as the days turned into weeks, he knew you weren't coming back to him.

You were there for him through everything. No matter how big or small. And now, with you no longer by his side, he was lost, as if he were wandering through a forest with no end.

His friends had noticed this early on, growing more worried as time went on, not knowing how to help. You would have known what to do in a situation like this, but you weren't here anymore.

Jungkook tried everything to get you to forgive him. But no matter what he did, how he apologised, you would never accept it.

"Y/n, please," he begged.

He was on his hands and knees, leaning forward, pleading for forgiveness. You stood above him, nothing but anger in your eyes.

"You're not sorry, Jungkook. You're just sorry you got caught."

"What do I have to do to make you forgive me. I know I was wrong. I know I shouldn't have talked badly about you or shared your secrets. I know how badly I've hurt you, and I want to make things right," Jungkook cried out, tears now forming.

"There's nothing you can do," you answered coldly. "I don't want you to talk to me ever again. You got that?"

You hadn't bothered to wait for an answer, turning on your heel and walking away. Jungkook stayed still, his forehead pressed against the floor, tears cascading down his cheeks and hitting the concrete.

From then on, Jungkook kept his distance, but never once stopped caring for you. He would watch you from afar, making sure you were safe.

You had made a new group of friends over time, sitting with them during lunch. You knew Jungkook was watching you. You had often caught him staring.

You'd be lying if you had said you didn't miss him. But he hurt you deeply, and you knew you couldn't forgive him for what he had done. But knowing he was watching you, in a way, made you feel safe.

"Y/n," your friend, Min, chirped in your ear.

You flinched at the sound of your name, zoning back in and looking at your group of friends. They all giggled at you, making you smile sheepishly.

"Sorry. I was in my own world."

"We could tell," Sara laughed. "So this weekend there's a party happening at Min's boyfriend's. Are you in?"

"Ah, I don't know," you said unsurely. Parties were never your thing. You loved a drink, but typically you preferred that in your own dorm with friends.

"Oh, come on, Y/n! You never come out," Min pouted, looking at you with pleading eyes.

"Fine," you sighed.

The girls cheered, quickly bidding you goodbye as they made their way to class. You sat, uncomfortable at the thought of the party. But your friends were right. You hadn't properly been out with them, and now it was time to change that.

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

You arrived at the party with your friends an hour after it had started, and it was packed. Music blared from every direction. Cups and empty booze cans had been discarded in every possible part of the house.

"Fucking hell," Sara yelled over the music.

You all pushed in through the front door, slowly squeezing past the dancing bodies and into the kitchen.

"Min! Ladies, so glad you could make it!" your friend's boyfriend slurred.

He was completely smashed. Min cringed at her boyfriend's state, slinging his arm over her shoulder.

"I'll get him outside for some fresh air and water," she yelled, picking up a bottle of unopened water. "Just pour yourselves some drinks and I'll be back soon!"

With that, Min left. Sara quickly grabbed a beer and popped the can open. She offered you one, but you shook your head, instead grabbing a cup and pouring yourself a rum and coke.

You glanced around the room, taking a sip of your drink. At that moment, your eyes landed on a familiar figure. Jungkook. He was laughing, for what seemed like the first time in a while, talking to his friends.

He wore a pair of ripped black jeans and a loose black top. And his hair was slightly damp with sweat. You fought with yourself to not go over and speak to him. Every time you saw him, your heart ached. As if he had sensed your presence, he turned, locking eyes with you.

You quickly avoided his gaze, deciding it may be better to drink more than you initially planned. Making sure Jungkook was watching, you downed your drink in a shift motion.

"Fucking hell Y/n, I didn't realise you could drink like that!" Sara laughed, clapping enthusiastically. Min had returned at that moment, cheering when she had seen you holding out a drink for her.

"Let's get fucked up," you joked, laughing with them.

Jungkook's jaw clenched as he watched you down your drink. He hadn't known you would be here. His friends continued to talk amongst themselves until Jimin noticed Jungkook's lack of attention.

Jimin nudged Yoongi, and together they followed Jungkook's gaze until it fell upon you.

"Oh fucking hell," Yoongi groaned. The three boys watched as you poured your third drink. You and Sara pushed your cups together before downing them.

"Should we stop her?" Jimin asked Yoongi.

"Honestly, I don't know."

For the next two hours, the three boys watched you closely. Yoongi had to stop Jungkook from storming over whenever a boy would begin to talk to you. He couldn't blame the guys who were shamelessly flirting with you. Tonight, you looked stunning.

You had decided to wear a short black dress that stopped at the mid-thigh and a pair of knee-high heeled boots. Something which Jungkook had never seen you wear before. It was very clear that Min and Sara had taken you out to the mall to get some new clothes.

By this point, you were drunk, but the boys were surprised at how well you were holding your drink. Sara was struggling to keep up with you, gagging every now and then as if she was going to be sick. And she was.

You guided your friend to the sink so she could spew somewhere that wasn't as hard to clean. Your cup had been left on the countertop while you rubbed your friend's back reassuringly.

"Is she alright?" someone asked from behind you.

You turned around to see someone you didn't know. All you knew was that he was handsome. He was resting against the countertop, concern written all over his face.

"Ye-yeah, she's fine. Just had a bit too much," you reassured, still rubbing your friend's back. You glanced over at Min, who grinned. She moved to you, pushing your hand off Sara's back, motioning you to go to the boy.

"Go," she said quickly, then returned to Sara.

"I don't believe we've met. I'm Ha-joon." He held his hand out.

"Y/n," you responded, taking his hand and shaking it.

"Do you wanna dance?" he offered.

Drunkenly, you accepted, grabbing your drink and allowing him to pull you into the crowd of people on the makeshift dance floor. The music blared as you both danced, slowly getting closer to one another.

You allowed Ha-joon to grab you by the waist and began to lead your movements. You laughed, drinking the last of your drink and spinning around so you faced him. Letting your arms fall over his shoulders, you began to grind into each other, completely letting go.

Jungkook eyed you, anger building up as he watched you dance with Ha-joon. His fists clenched, the urge to protect you intensifying. Yoongi grabbed hold of Jungkook, making him look back at the other boy. Yoongi shook his head, warning Jungkook not to interfere.

When the song had finished, you laughed, pulling away from Ha-joon. You sauntered back over to the kitchen and leaned against the countertop. Min and Sara were gone, most likely upstairs to get cleaned up.

Ha-joon stood behind you, placing his hands on your hips and pulling you flush against his chest. At that moment, your head began to spin, feeling as if your legs were going to give out.

"Let's get out of here," Ha-joon whispered in your ear.

You stumbled out of the house behind him, allowing Ha-joon to lead you away from the party.

"W-wait," you stammered. "I really don't feel... good."

Ha-joon sighed, looking back at you.

"I know it must be a horrible feeling. But you're just so fucking hot," he muttered. He watched as you slumped to the floor, passing out on the spot. Drunkenly, he pulled you up by the neck, his hot breath fanning your face. He leaned in, kissing you.

"You fucking bastard!"

At the moment, Ha-joon was pulled off of you and thrown back onto the ground. Jungkook stood above him, chest heaving in rage. He stepped over Ha-joon, kneeling down and let his fist collide with his face.

Yoongi and Jimin had followed behind, covering your legs and shoulders with their jackets.

"Kook," Yoongi growled, stepping over to the younger boy. "Jungkook, that's enough!"

Yoongi aggressively pulled Jungkook off the unconscious boy. Jungkook calmed for a moment, realising he had completely lost control. He turned and ran to you.

"Y/n," he breathed. He moved your damp, sweaty hair out of your face, cupping it between his hands.

He looked over your body, making sure Ha-joon hadn't done anything but kiss you. Jungkook scooped you up into his arms, looking back at his friends.

"Whose house is closest?"

"Mine," Yoongi responded. "It will also be the best place for Y/n. It's where she's been living for the past few weeks."

Jungkook shot Yoongi a look, but now wasn't the time. What was important was that he got you somewhere safe.

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

The next morning, you rose with the worst headache you'd ever experienced. It was as if the world was still spinning. You held your hand to your head, a poor attempt to try and make sense of where you were.

"Y/n," a voice beside you said.

Blinking to try and focus your eyes, you looked in the direction of the voice. Beside you sat Yoongi and Jimin, who both looked incredibly worried.

"Hey guys," you groaned. "God, my head."

"Are you alright, Y/n?" Jimin asked, moving to take hold of your other hand.

"Yeah, I'm fine... why?"

"Last night at the party. You were spiked," Yoongi explained.

All the memories came flooding back in that moment. Sara being sick, you having left your cup on the countertop to help her. At that time, Ha-joon had come over. He had spiked your drink before he spoke to you.

"Oh my god," you said in a panic. "Did- Did he..."

"No, he didn't," Jimin cut you off.

"You're lucky that Jungkook had been watching you, Y/n. If it wasn't for him..." Yoongi trailed off.

"Jungkook... Jungkook saved me?" you asked in disbelief. "Why would he do that?"

"Because despite all he's said and done to you. He still cares deeply for you, Y/n," Yoongi spoke. "And I know you've seen it as well."

You sat in silence, not knowing what to do or say. After so long. After everything he said, how could he care for you? For the first time in a long while, you cried. You leaned forward, tears rolling down your cheeks at the realisation of just how much he truly cared for you.

"Y/n?"

Your head shot up at the familiar voice. Jungkook. In that moment, it was as if time had frozen. He stood by the door, half hidden behind it, in case you didn't want to see him.

He flinched when you climbed out of the bed and ran at him. You pulled the door away from him and threw your arms around him, crying aloud. He was shocked but immediately wrapped his arms around you, a feeling he had missed so dearly.

"We'll leave you two," Jimin whispered as the other boys left.

Jungkook did what he did best when it came to comforting you. He stroked your hair, whispering reassuringly in your ear. You both sank to the floor, where Jungkook proceeded to rock you back and forward gently.

Slowly, your sobs stopped, your breathing becoming even once again. In that moment, you knew just how much you missed Jungkook.

"I'm so sorry," you choked out.

Jungkook shook his head.

"You have nothing to apologise for," he cooed. "I'm the one who should be sorry for every word I said. And for not being quick enough to realise what had happened and protect you sooner."

You mimicked him, shaking your head. He chuckled, bringing you so that your head rested against his chest. You could feel his heart race.

"I took your friendship for granted, and for that, I truly am sorry. These past weeks, honestly, have been hell," he admitted. "It felt as if part of me was missing when you weren't around. And if I could take back everything I said, I would in a heartbeat."

"All that matters is that you're here now, Kook," you breathed, grasping a fistful of his shirt.

You both stayed as you were, holding one another in a moment of silence, enjoying each other's presence, having missed it for so long.

hello there! hope you enjoyed the final part of this mini series! it may not have been what people wanted, but I was just in my feels with it.

tranquilreign~

[luna-azzurra]

How to Actually Write a Fairytale

Writing a fairytale isn’t about copying what came before. It’s about echoing it and breathing new life into the bones of old stories, while still leaving fingerprints that are entirely your own.

➥ Know the Genre Like It’s Your Grandmother’s Favorite Story

You don’t have to memorize every tale from the Brothers Grimm or Andersen, but you do need to understand the rhythm of a fairytale. The structure. The tone. The strange, brutal, beautiful logic where wolves talk and curses are casually handed out like snacks.

Read the classics—but don’t just admire them. Ask why they’ve lasted. Why we keep retelling “Cinderella” or “Beauty and the Beast.” Why we crave stories where the wicked are punished and the good get their happily ever after (or… don’t).

Then, ask yourself: what do you believe about happy endings?

➥  Make the World Feel Like a Dream You Just Woke Up From

Your setting shouldn’t feel like a postcard, it should feel like a mood. That forest? It’s not just a bunch of trees. It’s ancient and alive and maybe watching you. That castle on the hill? What lives inside it isn’t just royal—it’s wrong.

Don’t overdescribe. Don’t over-explain. Fairytale settings thrive on feeling, mystery, awe, fear, delight. Focus on texture and sound. On atmosphere. Give the reader goosebumps with a sentence, not a paragraph.

➥  Use Archetypes Like Skeletons, Not Cages

Yes, fairytales run on familiar characters: the hero, the princess, the wicked stepmother. But don’t just copy and paste those roles. Twist them. Make your hero afraid of bravery. Let your princess save herself and then ask why she even needed saving in the first place.

Give your characters choices. Inner lives. Secrets. Let them lean into their archetypes and then stumble out of them. That’s what keeps your story from feeling like a copy of a copy.

➥  Say Something That Matters (Even If It's Wrapped in Magic)

Fairytales aren’t just bedtime stories, they’re moral delivery systems in disguise. Every ogre, quest, and talking raven is hiding a deeper truth.

So what’s yours?

Don’t force it. But do let your story mean something. Maybe it’s about growing up. About forgiveness. About not trusting charming strangers with cursed apples. Let the theme grow like ivy between your lines, quiet but impossible to ignore.

➥ Add a Sprinkle of Strange With Magical Beings

It doesn’t have to be a fairy or a dragon... though those are always welcome. Think beyond the usual. A dog who speaks only in riddles. A grandmother made of smoke. A house that walks on bird legs (looking at you, Baba Yaga).

Make your magic feel old. Like it was here before your character showed up, and it’ll be here long after they’re gone.

➥ Don’t Be Afraid to Make It Hard

Fairytales are not soft. They have teeth. Let your characters struggle. Let the curse hurt. Let the villain win for a minute too long.

Readers don’t fall in love with perfect heroes—they fall in love with tested ones. Give your characters impossible tasks. Curses that twist them into shadows. Quests that demand sacrifice.

Then let them choose who they want to be on the other side.

➥ Use the Old Bones, but Give Them Your Voice

Start with “Once upon a time” if it feels right. Or don’t. Just make sure the story has rhythm. Fairytales move fast, but not rushed. They feel inevitable. Like fate wrapped in a metaphor.

Keep it simple, but not shallow. Let your prose feel like poetry snuck in wearing a cloak. Make your reader feel like they’re hearing a story that’s older than memory, even if you wrote it yesterday.

➥ Magical Objects? Yes Please. But Make Them Count

Magic beans, mirrors, rings, cloaks... yes. But don’t just throw in trinkets like party favors. Give them purpose. The thing that glows should glow for a reason. The potion should do more than heal, it should reveal. Or trick. Or demand a price.

Magic in fairytales always comes with rules. Use that. Break your character with the thing that’s supposed to save them.

➥ Let People Change (and Not Just With a Magic Wand)

True transformation in a fairytale isn’t just “frog turns prince.” It’s “child becomes brave.” “Witch becomes mother.” “Monster learns to forgive themselves.”

Let your characters grow, like painfully, beautifully. Give them chances to change, and the agency to take them. Or not. Either way, that’s where the real magic is.

➥ You Get to Choose the Ending

Happy? Bittersweet? Vaguely cursed but weirdly satisfying?

You’re not chained to “...and they lived happily ever after.” You can write “…and she never returned to the forest, but it never stopped watching her.” Or “…and his heart stayed quiet for the rest of his life, but at least it was his.”

Just make it feel like an ending. One that lingers. One that knows the story is done, but the lesson might echo long after the last line.

[bionic-vapour-boy]

i realized how tumblr sheltered the Conclave fandom was when i went on youtube and every other video essay was saying that it was "an attack on christianity" and "woke". way to miss the point

the point of the movie is to criticize the church, and how so many people now prioritize the church (whether it is the positions those in power have, the image it has, the power one can have within it, etc. etc) over actually following the teachings of Jesus (of forgiveness, and love, and caring for others, etc.) . it criticizes the conservatives (tedesco), who would rather return to the values that they think are right than to accept an ever changing world, and to spread the love and forgiveness that Jesus asks them to. it criticizes those who have positions in power in the church and have used this power to hide the harm they have caused others (adeyemi). it criticizes those who use the power the church has to further their personal goals (tremblay). it criticizes the liberals who claim to want to include those excluded and oppressed by the church in the past but refuse to actually stand up and say/do something meaningful (bellini).

and then you have lawrence, a man who fears he is doubting god, while in reality he doubts the church, yet to him what is most important is the visuals of all of it. it has to look like he truly believes, that he truly is fit for the job, that he really is a part of this. he has to make sure that the right candidate gets chosen that makes the church look the best. and it all comes crashing down when Benitez arrives. he is the ideal. he has been there, in the most dangerous places he can be, helping those in extreme conditions, even risking his life to do so. in the book he explicitly says that some of the most important work he has done is directly helping thousands of women who have been victims of genocidal rape. and he does this as a geniune desire to help others. to act by the word of God. he is the one with the least aspirations to papacy, but with the truest connection to God, which is why he prevails at the end.

and it is what a lot of people miss about him being intersex. its not this crazy plot twist to shock the viewers, or this dei inclusion plot to own the catholics or something. benitez is, out of all the 118 cardinals in the conclave, the most fit for the job of pope. so why should it matter that he is intersex? he is what god made him after all. but lawrence is concerned. does this make him inelegible for the position? what if word gets out? how will the people react? the concern is ultimately, about the church, how it will look, how it will react. not God. and benitez does not care what people think. he is what god made him, he is happy with who he is, and he has come to terms with his intersex traits. so once again, why should it matter? and it is what the movie is trying to say. so many people focus too much on the church, on the rules that humans have made up about what is right and what is wrong, on who is allowed to be part of the curia, that they have forgotten that god truly stands for. that they care more about the genitals of the pope than what he stands for, than what he is capable of, than the good he has done. and as a catholic it has put into writing (and speech) so many thoughts and feelings that i have had for a while, especially benitez speech after the explosion.

this movie does not hate catholicism!! it loves catholicism!! its symbolism, its love and detail for the setting, the clothing, the nuns. its all so careful and loving. the people like those i mentioned at the beginning are exactly who Conclave criticizes.

[balteus]

actually re: fromsoftware politics. i do think it's very interesting that the anti-colonialist RLF, ostensibly considered the 'good guys' of the game, were initially explicitly called the communist faction. armored core always has been a series critical of oligarchies and hyper-capitalism, but it's... very interesting to see just how blatant that is in ac6 specifically

you'd think that fromsoftware would eventually drop the ball on the "the ruling class will kill you and cannibalise itself in order to stay alive" considering that they're considered elite AAA devs rn, but thinking about elden ring and ac6's narratives, they've really only gotten more obvious about it - the horrors of colonialism and genocide and the sympathy given to the rage of its victims is something that's actually insane to see, to me, from such a big studio - fromsoft doesn't even attempt to be centrist about it.

for example, the frenzy flame ending. the only thing melina can tell you to dissuade you from pursuing it, ie literally destroying the world forever, is that there's still beauty in the world, apart from the suffering the golden order had caused. at no point however is the sheer despair of the people that the flame represents villanized. if anything, it's portrayed as a self-fulfilling prophecy, it is a tragedy. the only villain is the order who slaughtered all of these people, the flame of despair is something that emerged in them as they were buried alive. and the flame isn't even intended as a revenge upon the world, it's simply a means to end the pain they feel for being subjected to this.

their grief isn't something for the player to judge, it isn't something they're forced to overcome, it's simply a physical manifestation of the reality that was forced upon them. and these people, the merchants, are still kind to us, even knowing the order that we pursue. (in fact, the true, considered best ending of elden ring, is literally just sacrificing yourself in order to achieve complete anarchism. and getting a cool wife to endure the loneliness of space along the way)

in ac6 then, ayre is so terribly forgiving towards us, knowing what we are, knowing what made us, knowing what we participate in. some of this undoubtedly is because of her narrative role, she has to be a sympathetic character. but we do get to see her rage at the end, her grief for her species being seen as nothing more than a resource to be exploited or burned fully vocalized. but the RLF is sympathetic too as resistance fighters who want their home back. the only criticism the game ever leverages towards the RLF is that they're actually not radical enough in their pursuit of freedom, and that criticism is made by a villain.

it's so... i almost want to say optimistic? other games would have tried to pull a "ooh but what if the good guys did bad things (poor attempt at moral grayness)" but no, the RLF is justified at every step of the way. idk it makes me feel things. i dont particularly want to portray fromsoftware as these bastions of political correctness or sth - they're not perfect and i don't expect that ever lmao, but it's so fucking weird that their games are this progressive and have been for a long ass time.

[yesimwriting]

something about bestfriend!felix who's so used to the world bending over backwards to please him that he seems entirely separated from the concept of boundaries.

it's one of the few things about him that remains unspoken because it reminds those in his social circle that no matter how much influence or money they might have, someone has more. and that someone is felix catton.

he's never weird about it, there's just this rule that everyone learns to pick up on and never mention. if felix wants to go out for the night or do anything socially with someone, it's customary for that person to cancel any other plans.

it might be more of an issue if felix's proximity didn't feel like sunbathing on an early summer day, but it does. so he's used to not having to work to get someone where he wants them.

until you.

despite your friendship still being relatively new, the two of you have bonded enough for you to accept his presence instantly.

felix didn't call before coming over. you answered the door after two knocks, grinning as soon as you saw him standing there. you didn't even think to ask about the lack of notice, you just invited him in and made some comment about how you were just studying.

he told you he didn't mind if you wanted to keep studying, that he brought over his own textbooks just in case. even though you were set up at your desk, you moved your supplies over to your bed so that you could sit with him.

it started off as separated as the two of you ever are, just your bent knee pressing gently into his lower thigh. your shared restraint dissolved quickly.

you're practically laying down, back partially supported by a wall and two pillows, felix's head resting on your stomach as you comb your fingers through his hair. he's holding up a textbook for you with one arm, fingertips absentmindedly brushing against your bare leg.

he breaks the silence with a sigh. when you don't respond, he turns his head and presses his lips against your thigh. your nails freeze against his scalp. "felix."

"lovie," he replies, tone as scandalized as yours. you sigh, and he can practically feel your eye roll.

felix grins, turning his head look up at you. he knows he should be good about this, about you, but he's not accustomed to practicing this kind of restraint. he's preoccupied with terribly soft thoughts of closer when he blurts out the question, "come out with me tonight?"

it's only a question by technicality, his eyes bright as if you've already agreed.

you press your lips together, and the hesitance in the look jabs at him. he brushes his knuckles against the side of your leg like that might tip the decision. "i have an econ test on monday."

the excuse deflates him. it's only friday, and even if it wasn't, you don't need to worry about your grades. there's a naturalness to your schooling, you grasp everything almost immediately. any personal selfishness aside, you don't need a weekend of studying. it's objective fact.

you're still watching him, expression unsure. "y'know too much studying's bad for you." your lips part, but before you can say anything, felix is shutting the book he'd been holding up for you.

he extends his arm, his palm covering the upper half of your face with the palm of his hand. you laugh out his name. "what? your eyes need the rest." you shift, still giggling as you halfheartedly try to push him off. "you'll get a headache."

your fingers wrap around his wrist. "you're my headache."

he lets out a mock gasp before pulling away entirely. felix doesn't miss your slight pout as he sits up. "actually?"

you're chasing after him, sitting up and attempting to grab his arm. felix lets you. "no." you squeeze his arm to you. "i meant it in a you're my best friend way."

"that so?" you nod innocently, all wide eyes as if to say see? i have no intentions of being anything other than a perfect angel.

felix pretends to contemplate forgiveness, then, with no warning lays down. you're not given a chance to deliberate what that means before he's tugging on your arm. he mumbles a brief, explanatory, "c'mere," as he pulls you into his chest.

you listen, moving to rest your chin against the side of his chest. your arm's across him. felix's shirt has ridden up right where your fingertips naturally rest. the bare contact makes goosebumps break out across your arms.

"go out with me tonight," he tries, voice soft. you have to drop your gaze to keep from immediately melting and agreeing to whatever he wants. "c'mon, think it's good for you to take a break every now and then."

you lift your head up just enough to glare at him. felix shifts his leg, pressing it against yours. you push back gently, just enough to reciprocate the gesture. "so you're saying i'm a friendless loser that only ever goes out when you make me?"

"i'm saying," he extends the syllables to buy himself some time to think, "i have to go, and i won't have any fun without you."

you find it hard to imagine that felix catton ever has to do anything he doesn't want to. you're also confident in his ability to find fun at a party. "you have farleigh, and oliver, and annabel--you'll be fine without me."

his hand is on your back, fingers tracing lazy patterns against the fabric of your t-shirt. "i don't want anyone else." the soft whine in his tone paired with his slight pout makes him seem smaller, like a little kid that just needs to be wrapped up. "i want you."

"you have me."

felix frowns, "doesn't feel like it."

you're losing. "do you really want me to go that badly?"

he smiles, feeling the crack in your resolve. "we'll just go for a little. have a drink or two, then y'can sleepover if you want." you do like sleeping over in felix's dorm. "and then tomorrow we can do whatever you want--study, watch a movie, dinner."

a sleepover and a saturday. this no longer feels like a loss. you smile, "deal."

felix's available hand finds your hip. "that's my girl."

the comment makes your face feel warm, you drop your head to rest on his stomach to hide any potential signs of being flustered. he'd tease you to no end about it. "i should get up, start getting ready."

he runs his hand down your back, "it's not until later." he moves his hand back up slowly. his thumb starts traces circles against your shoulder. "we've got time."

----

omg bestfriend!felix blurbs are everything to me,, if you have any thoughts about bestfriend-verse pls lmk,,

also?? might have to write a full fic for bestfriend-verse

taglist; @vader-is-hot @spiritofbuddha @getosangie @freyafriggafrey

[witchthewriter]

𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐞𝐧𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞 ⋆.˚🦋༘⋆

⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・At first it was just kindness. You were there whenever Helaena needed you, and you soon you became her trusted friend.

・Trusted friend turned into something less platonic ... like a small evolution, Helaena realised that she could not live out her days without you by her side.

・Even though the Princess is not one for grand gestures of affection, you know just how all-consuming her love is ... in a deep yet quiet way.

・She gazes upon you with adoration, her violet eyes filled with a warmth barely anyone else ever receives.

・You are her safe place, her constant, the only one she can truly trust.

・Although she would NEVER say it outright - Helaena shows you her love through the way she lingers in your presence, the way her fingers brush slowly against yours, the soft smiles meant only for you.

・When you brush her hair, she leans into your touch, a small sigh escaping her lips.

・Sometimes, when she’s feeling brave, she will trace her fingers over your wrist absentmindedly, as if memorizing the feel of you. Both of you blush but neither says a word.

・She adores giving you small gifts—a butterfly pin she had made just for you, an embroidered handkerchief with her own initials (so that a piece of her is always with you), actually, a lot of your clothes have hidden bugs that she has sewn to signify that you are hers.

・She plucks flowers from the royal gardens and presses them into books before leaving them in your chambers, never saying a word about it.

・When she’s alone with you, she finally breathes. She lets down her walls and allows herself to be just Helaena, not a princess.

・She’ll ask you to stay with her a little longer, finding excuses for you to keep her company; whether it’s brushing her hair, helping her dress, or simply sitting in silence while she watches her insects.

・Helaena speaks in riddles and half-truths, but around you, her words take on a soft, intimate quality.

"If a moth is drawn to a flame, yet the flame does not burn it ..." (aka devotion from both ends. One is endless curiosity and the other is making sure their actions do not hurt the other. It's about you and her.)

・She is always comparing you to something ethereal - e.g., a rare moth, a fleeting sunrise, a melody no one else can hear but her.

・You asked her why she liked moths so much and she said: "moths are ... overlooked. Much more than butterflies. They are drawn to light...just like everyone else. Yet, just like everyone else. They are not treated the same."

・One of your favourite memories with Helaena is when she introduced you to Dreamfyre.

・You thought, 'surely today is the day that I day," oh how wrong you were.

・Dreamfyre chooses her riders for specific reasons both Rhaena Targaryen and Helaena Targaryen were not the most politically powerful of their time, nor were they the most feared.

・But Dreamfyre does not seek conquest or brute force—she seeks something deeper. Rhaena and Helaena both had a deep connection to things beyond the mortal world, and Dreamfyre recognized it.

・Rhaena and Helaena were both women who were not meant to rule. They were overlooked, dismissed, forced into positions they never truly wanted.

・Many Targaryens could have tried to claim Dreamfyre, but she has never allowed herself to be ruled by greed or ambition.

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

You Are My Safe Place

Always Hold Grudges (You) x Forgives Too Easily (Helaena)

Has Insane Dreams Of The Future (Helaena) x Believes All Of It - Lemme Write This Down Honey (You)

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Love Transcending Boundaries

Forbidden Love

Only You Understand

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Kiss Me by Sixpence None The Richer

Picture You by Chappel Roan

Do I Wanna Know by Hozier

𝒀𝒐𝒖 & 𝑫𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒇𝒚𝒓𝒆

・To Helaena, Dreamfyre is more than just her dragon; she is her kindred spirit, the only creature who has always understood her.

・Dreamfyre is ancient, wise, and deeply connected to her rider’s emotions. If Helaena is bringing you to meet her, it means she sees you as someone truly important.

・The cave depths of the Dragonpit echo with the sound of slow, deep breathing as Dreamfyre stirs at Helaena’s approach. The Dragonpit is huge; even more spacious down below, where the chained dragons sleep.

・You were glad that Dreamfyre's place was quite close to the exit.

・As you walked closer to the now fully awake, and alert dragon, you squeezed Helaena's hand tightly, your fingers trembling. Hell you're whole body feels like it's trembling.

・When you're close, you can see Dreamfyre's great silver-blue head and her glowing eyes ... that settle on you with deep intensity.

・Your heart starts to pound even more so.

・Helaena strokes the dragon’s snout, whispering in High Valyrian, her voice a soft hum against the cavern’s stillness. Then she turns to you.

“Now you must not be afraid,” she murmurs, because there is an underlying meaning beneath her words: Dreamfyre will know if you are.

・The dragon sniffs the air, then lowers her massive head, exhaling a warm breath that ruffles your hair. She is assessing you.

・You hold your ground. Dying by a dragon seems like a pretty cool way to go, so you stare the dragon in the eyes. And for some reason, your hand start to move.

・You gently cup the side of Dreamfyre's face and smile.

・Helaena is holding her breath - she hadn't expected you to do that. And she's impressed.

・With a few slow blinks, Dreamfyre huffs which causes your hair to fly backwards.

・And then you feel it, her head moving towards your hand, liking the touch.

"She accepts you," Helaena says with glee.

[glasskey]

Season 6 - Critical Mass

Fuck me. Season 6. Some loved it, most hated it. Episode 9 in particular really brought the whole house of cards down for this season, and left the writers and show runners with nothing but angry fans and a thousand questions to answer. I started making my own list sometime ago and episode 9 just tipped me over into critical mass. Because it involved the death of not one but two beloved characters, fans were let’s say, a little miffed. The choice to off Nick Blaine in particular has drawn considerable heat and there’s plenty of reasons why. Let’s take a look at some of the biggest reasons that Season 6 broke abso-fucking-loutely everything.

Firstly, I don’t think that it’s an exaggeration to say that at times season 6 just felt surreal and not in a good way. Previous seasons had set up the rules and guidelines for this world and season 6 simply didn’t care about any of them. For instance; how were people just waltzing in and out of Gilead now? That place used to be fucking locked down. Spot lights, dogs, guard towers, drones, Eyes….anyone remember how Emily had to swim over that freezing river with Holly to get to freedom and it was scary AF? Baby Holly nearly drowned. Now June Osborne, Gilead public enemy number one is just jumping in the car to go shuttle Lawrence across the border to a completely abandoned aircraft hangar. But season 6 didn’t stop there, it also didn’t respect the laws of gravity when it dangled Osborne from a crane 30 feet in the air and then hurled her to the ground without a scratch. In addition to disregarding the very laws of physics, Season 6 also gave characters amnesia on multiple occasions, cited off screen occurrences as lore as some sort of “fail safe”, sought to rewrite characters very natures, violated original texts, assumed knowledge, disregarded plot holes and selectively altered the basic moral compass by which characters would be judged. In fact, there really isn’t much that season 6 didn’t do in terms of just breaking all the guidelines that keep a world intact. I can only hope that it will be used as an example of what NOT to do by future writers, because quite honestly the disbelief and anger by audiences has been visceral, and personally I’ve never wanted to smash my television more.

This season was meant to be about people showing their true faces and I am STUNNED that somewhere, somehow these writers have justified that a woman who participated in multiple rapes, stole a baby, and had her hand in the conception of Gilead, has a benevolent “true face”. On Serena’s wedding night she was astonished to learn that her new husband, King of all the High Commanders was a die hard loyalist who liked to keep a handmaid on staff. She had a bit of a whimper but next morning she was ready to kiss and make up, and then her new hubby left for a morning appointment to execute her bestie. Despite this, Serena the baby snatching rapist, was afforded a redemption arc. I was and am, horrified.

Show runners have seen fit to state that Serena and June were actually the love story all along and I cannot tell you how much it disgusts me to hear that they would actually think that a victim / abuser relationship should ever be described as such. I am deeply disturbed that the creators of this show believe it is appropriate to describe the relationship between a kidnapper, rapist, physical and psychological abuser and their victim, as a love story. To say that June is able to forgive her abuser is one thing, to say that she loves her is quite another. If Serena had been a man, a father, she would have pushed her aboard that doomed plane. As it was she was a mother and therefore untouchable so she ultimately walked away virtually unscathed. So the writers message was we could be forgiven anything, even the vilest acts against our own gender, as long as we reproduced. If they intended me to feel all supported and warm and fuzzy as a woman, they well and truly missed the mark. Women like Serena Joy are fucking traitors, because they know full well what it’s like to be a woman, to fight for every single tiny square inch of freedom, and yet they seek to seize power by crushing their fellow women beneath their heel in order to get it.

Next in line is Aunt Lydia, who sanctioned and carried out torture, rape and murder. She arranged for Janine’s eye to be ripped out and farmed women into slavery. Suddenly she was pleading ignorance over what actually happens to the handmaids in their retirement? Are you fucking kidding me? This woman was so far up Gilead’s arse there was literally nothing that demon didn’t know about what was happening to those Handmaids. Atwood’s text reveals the aunts kept secret detailed files on all of them, and having Aunt Lydia now whining about her “poor girls” after tasing them for 5 seasons is laughable. She’d chained a pregnant handmaid in the basement and informed June she’d be shot after giving birth, so all of her sudden crocodile tears about the ex handmaids being sent to Jezebels was the weakest bunch of bullshit I’d ever seen for her entire character arc. But she’s needed for The Testaments, so she had a benevolent face slapped on her at the last moment and was given a redemption arc of sorts as well. Writers also failed to explain how Aunt Lydia was going to be embedded back into Gilead society now that she’s blown her cover.

Next victim is Lawrence. Last season Lawrence shot down the rescue planes for Hannah and told Blaine that it was a free for all to use June Osborne as target practice. He’s responsible for inventing a world of slavery and death, and he kept his wife imprisoned for years, but Lawrence has a strong papa bear vibe with some punchy one liners, so he gets a redemption arc and a heroes death. It’s worth mentioning that Joseph was actually the one responsible for dragging Serena back to Gilead and NOT Blaine as the Show runners would have you believe. Blaine actually spoke up for her, asking if “it was really necessary to drag her back into this”, however this was painted as Blaine’s decision to bring Serena back……despite the fact it was Lawrence who suggested it…..and physically went and got her…..and virtually strong armed her into the car. It’s also worth noting that Lawrence was all aboard the Gilead train, chowing down on that delicious power as a newly appointed High commander, until he learned that all the other commanders (except Blaine) were gunning for him. So it’s really not like he gave a shit about Mayday out of some sense of righteous justice, he just thought it might save his own neck. The martyr’s death / self sacrificial death are the highest value character deaths and quite frankly I’m not sure he deserved that quality of death but he’s cuddly and Whitford didn’t want him to die a villain, so there you go.

Finally we come to Nick Blaine. Out of the Gilead four this season, he was definitely the one most deserving of a redemption arc, but you know clever plot twist, scapegoat required….and guess who gets fucked after 5 seasons. Nick Blaine had spent 5 seasons risking his life on almost a bi seasonal basis for the protagonist, was deeply in love with her and had connections in Mayday. But in season 6 the writers decided to transform him into nothing but a greedy, power hungry, little fascist over the course of 3 episodes, and then unceremoniously had the protagonist kill him off as some sort of true measure of her strength. The writers not only made him the villain and had him killed, but gave him a death befitting a coward. I’m not sure who thought it would be a good idea to serve up this pile of revenge to a fan favourite who’d been a benevolent companion to the protagonist for the last 5 seasons….but it hideously back fired. I foresaw this when I viewed the original trailers and I prayed that they hadn’t been so stupid as to destroy both a character and a couple that over 80% of the audience were deeply invested in with a spin off waiting in the wings….unfortunately they were and the backlash has been brutal. It was around the time that they decided to bring it all home, that I couldn’t help but notice that out of all of the Gilead four, they’d actually taken the lowest socioeconomic character and seen fit to make him the sole villain and then grind him into a fine powder. It was one thing in season 1 when they illustrated how the poor and uneducated masses could be easily targeted and recruited, it was quite another to make the statement that because he came from “nothing” he was more likely to turn to villainy. Reality is, the well spring of most of the worlds evil fuckery lies deep in the hearts of those born to wealth and power. They’re used to it, they don’t like to share it, they’re terrified of losing it and they’ll do anything to get more of it. My nomination for most likely villain out of the Gilead Four was actually Serena. She's used to wealth and power and desperate to send her little spawn of Satan to a decent private school.

Meanwhile in Mayday central the folks there could do no wrong; Tuello fed civilians into the meat grinder that was Gilead’s highly trained military against Blaine’s advice, and yet remained untouched by any moral judgement from the writers. While everyone cheered as Tuello strode purposefully into the room to find Serena breathless at the sight of her little thirst trap, I ground my teeth and felt my fingernails digging into my palms. I just couldn’t help but wonder why on earth would Tuello trust Lawrence after that little incident with Hannah last season either. He’d just been burnt by Nick and his first response is to go pal up with the Architect of Gilead himself? I also didn’t understand why Tuello was skulking around in No Man’s Land in the first place. All the other diplomats were welcome in New Bethlehem, so why wasn’t he running recon or checking in with why Blaine suddenly wasn’t answering his calls? Why not set up a diplomatic embassy in New Bethlehem? Perhaps because IT WOULD HAVE MADE SENSE. This season saw Blaine give up Mayday’s plan. He’d chosen his side apparently and it wasn’t Osborne….after 5 seasons of choosing Osborne (sigh). So I couldn’t help but wonder why this hideous traitor didn’t just tell the other commanders where Mayday central was? He knew approximately where it was and yet there they were all hopping on a plane to DC to work out some intricate plan to curb the rebel operations. I mean the guy could virtually draw a map with a sign that says “bomb here” pointing to the Mayday camp and yet…..Urgh.

The character transformations have gone from zero to a hundred with nothing in between this season. Luke went from wanting to join Mayday, to planting bombs, to running around screaming with a machine gun and hand grenades. Rita went from not wanting to get involved with Mayday, to poisoning the cake with sedatives, to running screaming down the street shooting wildly. Serena got engaged and married in like a week and went from “I didn’t really think about what happened to the handmaids”, to teary eyed demanding to know the “real name” of her new one. Nick proclaimed his undying love for June, 10 seconds later they had a brutal break up, next episode he virtually skipped down the aisle with his wife singing about his new baby and renouncing the parentage of Holly, then he completely ignored the fact that the love of his life was about to be hung (can we just pause and consider how absolutely unbelievable THAT is please), said some BIZARRE shit about commanders being the winners and promptly exploded. Fuuuuuuuck. I mean it would have been hilariously ridiculous if it wasn’t just so fucking tragic to watch all that potential come to such a pointless end. Like so many things this season, this plot line doesn’t make any sense at all. I mean how were these commanders the “winners”? The rebels had just bombed their city and killed most of them, they were practically an endangered species. Somehow the audience was convinced into believing that if the Boston commanders ever made it to DC, Gilead would win and rule over the earth forever and ever. I guess that must have been where they had been keeping their secret special map room and chanting circle. I mean where is the plot? Is the plot in the room with us now? The trajectory on Blaine’s character arc comparative to other seasons, felt like the pilot had suddenly decided to fly the plane into the mountain (excuse the pun). He’d been building to something huge and both of Atwood’s texts indicated that Mayday was in his future, however it was at this point that the writers took incredible licence and deviated from the source material completely. It seemed a huge violation that Blaine’s character was altered from the version in both texts and while all the other characters were carefully manoeuvred into place, he was killed off. Granted Miller and co. had, had the freedom to fill in the blanks between season 2 - 6, various elements of the texts still acted as a guide for these characters natures, journeys and ultimate destinations and there was just no way around the fact that they’d chosen to completely ignore it. Insultingly I was asked to ignore Blaine’s death on the basis that he “had it coming”. Not only was that NOT an answer as to why such liberties were taken with the source material about his nature, depicted allegiances, and you know the fact that he was fucking ALIVE in the book, but that reasoning was also completely riddled with holes.

Throughout the seasons Blaine had been firmly established as an ally to the protagonist via a multitude of mechanisms which were now being blatantly discounted. For example; ALL of the acts of violence that the audience had been shown that were directly and voluntarily committed by Blaine were all performed AGAINST a member of Gilead to either protect the protagonist, at her request or as a form of righteous justice for her cause. Now I was being told that off screen he’d been sneaking around the protagonists back committing horrendous acts on behalf of Gilead….but we just hadn’t seen it….and didn’t know about it…..and SOMEHOW the writers couldn’t understand how that would be confusing..…or even believable. Urgh. The more I looked, the more holes appeared and the more it all just reeked of rewriting history for the sake of a plot twist and a quickly constructed political narrative. For whatever reason it was done, it was sloppy and completely contradictory to the characters original nature, both on screen and in the texts. Even if I did give these writers the benefit of the doubt and BELIEVED their spiel about this character, I’m not sure it worked in their favour to be constantly pointing out that they had neglected to fill in the audience properly on vital character elements during previous seasons.

For some reason the writers and show runners were now under the illusion that their audience had not actually been paying attention while watching the previous 5 seasons, that they had developed some sort of selective amnesia. They also deemed to give the protagonist amnesia, thus making her seem unempathetic, heartless and deeply unlikeable. Blaine had turned up for her countless times and yet was given no quarter. She had simply developed amnesia about what it was like to try and survive in Gilead after a brief stay in Canada. The writers may have intended to make her look strong and assertive, but her failure to extend any measure of compassion or even seek to dig further, made it seem as though the entire relationship had been transactional. It was as if now that Blaine had ceased to serve a purpose, he was being abandoned. This effectively destroyed any integrity to their former bond, it simply made him look like a liar and her an opportunist. I became a bit suspicious that it was not entirely unintentional that these creators were now seeking to change the very nature of this relationship in retrospect, when June attributed Serena responsibility for their relationship in the first place. It sought to completely discount the fact that these two had been circling one another prior to Serena's interference, or even that they continued their relationship despite her objections and efforts to seperate them later.

It was simply more evidence of an almost desperate attempt by the writers to erase this loving connection and replace it with something convenient and superficial. They’d forgotten that Nick and June’s love was actually an act of rebellion, forbidden, a place where both Blaine and Osborne sought freedom and autonomy. Had they remembered this, they might have understood that for a true depiction of a successful rebellion, Nick Blaine should have joined the underground and the two lovers destinies remained intimately intertwined. His true character narrative was as an Eye with connections to Mayday. June / Offred was unsure if she could trust him, but he remained a source of hope, love and quiet rebellion within Gilead. The Handmaids Tale afterword revealed that he’d risked his life to help June escape and gone on to join the resistance. Gilead had tried and failed to kill him at least once and he was later reunited with June and his daughter. The successful depiction of a rebellion that used their relationship as the intended metaphor, was one that had Blaine subvert Gilead as an Eye turned agent for Mayday. Instead his death indicated the success of Gilead to eradicate collective rebellion….by somehow encouraging rebel forces to self sabotage. It simply made no sense, particularly given the rebellions success in the area where Blaine had been stationed. It was like someone had either failed to understand the metaphor completely OR had simply been so desperate to destroy the character and the relationship, that they didn’t care if it meant tearing apart a central theme. Which was absolutely fucking insane.

Fans had followed the writers cues and had understood the underlying message of rebellion in their bond. They’d waited years for the rebellion to succeed and the symbolic narrative to reach it’s natural conclusion, by having Blaine cross the border to join June and Mayday. So when instead the writers chose to start labelling Blaine as a loyalist and gut this relationship, slaughtering this manifestation of collective rebellion, the audience was understandably angry and confused. His role as an embedded Mayday agent in The Testaments stand as evidence that this was precisely who Blaine was and not some dubious fascist all along. Atwood consulted during season 2, but it was only during season 3 that show runners decided to whack a commander suit on Blaine and start using him for statements about patriarchal power that had nothing to do with his original character construct. He was never a commander, not in The Handmaid’s Tale and not in The Testaments either…..but these writers thought they knew better than the author, so here we are. I think about the potential for this story line had it been completed correctly and I could just weep. I could write a book on why the destruction of this character and relationship was one of the dumbest fucking things I’ve ever seen a writer do to their own creation, and how this is one of the biggest violations of an authors symbolic narrative I’ve ever witnessed, but honestly I’ve got a lot to get through today.

The writers and staff scrambled to provide clarity about who Nick Blaine was all along, but what they failed to understand was that it was utterly irrelevant. If they had to tell audiences after the fact who their character actually was and what their true motivations were, then they’d failed their mission. Writers cited story elements that supposedly occurred off screen, as lore when they either should have been clearer from the beginning or just followed the established on screen character arc through without trying to get clever. Now for clarity I believe the rot started in season 5 but only truly set in in season 6.

Come season 6 Minghella would be lucky to get a few minutes of screen time in 6 episodes, and in that time they had to convince the audience that he’d been a totally different person than the one they’d been shown all along. Consider the characters nature, established relationship with the protagonist and everyone around him….over 5 seasons….now with ALL of that think about how impossible it actually is to flip that character in the space of approximately 10-15 minutes, and how insane you’d have to be to green light that shit. And yet SOMEHOW it was my fault for not believing them. Probably because I’d read the books.

Writers asked audiences to reassess characters 4 episodes from the end of a final season. That’s neither realistic or wise and they shouldn’t be surprised if people feel like they’ve been duped and cheated. The fact is that they told audiences that a character had a particular motivation for the last 5 seasons, etched it into to him like it was the very essence of his being, and suddenly they wanted audiences to believe that he was forsaking it in the last moment. That he would simply give it up at the first sign of adversity. That he’d be just kosher with not only giving it up but destroying the object of his obsession within 2 brief episodes. It’s utterly ridiculous, I don’t believe any of it and these writers shouldn’t be surprised by that. You can’t tell me that someone is deep and sensitive in one breath and then tell me they’re angling for an upper management position in a society that enslaves the vulnerable in the next….particularly if the bottom of barrel is exactly where they come from. It makes no fucking sense.

Because of his core nature as a sensitive, loving and loyal individual, the ONLY parts of Nick Blaine’s character that actually EVER made any sense were the ones attached to Mayday, those that loved June, that “would do anything for me and for Nicole”, that were trapped and tricked into signing onto Gilead, anything else just seemed in direct conflict with his personality overall. Blaine cried over a dead handmaid and refused to call June by her slave name, he had contacts in Mayday that he referred to as “friendlies”. What made the writers think I would believe an individual this sensitive and obviously invested in rebel operations, would seek a higher position in this society for ANY other reason than to subvert it? Ambitious greedy ghouls do not smuggle out letters of imprisoned handmaids and they don’t baulk over sleeping with their child brides. They just don’t give a fuck.

Right now show runners are working overtime to create a narrative in which they write off Nicks damning choices in episode 6 as the result of both full autonomy AND coercive control. If he acted with full autonomy, Blaine was a monster who knew what he was doing, sought power and subscribed to Gilead’s rhetoric of slavery. If he was acting as a result of coercive control he was frightened, abused and controlled with little to no recourse. The reason that the writers couldn’t decide which one it was, was because they wanted it to be the first, but they knew full well it was the second. Season 1 and 2 had already shown that Blaine was indeed stripped of his autonomy and yet in 5 10 Tuello claimed that he could have run away with her while he lived at the Waterfords. They were trying to alter the narrative around how much power he had possessed, but it was too late, we’d already seen the dogs, the drones, the spotlights, the checkpoints and all those guardians. We’d already seen all that old school Gilead terror and we weren’t about to forget it.

Show runners claimed that Blaine had full autonomy on the basis that he had many chances to defect, but again there was plenty of evidence to discredit this theory. In season 2 when Blaine took Osborne to the Boston Globe he said "I'm risking my life to save you", indicating he was monitored, restricted and had just about as much autonomy as she did. Had Blaine exercised full autonomy, there was no question he would have been captured and executed. When June boarded the plane to leave, a driver also attempted to sneak on board. He was hauled off the plane and shot by Gilead guards, this heavily implied that Blaine would have died if he’d tried to accompany her. In season 3 Eleanor told June that Lawrence could never leave because he’d be imprisoned for life. In season 4 Fred was arrested at the border and jailed, when he tried to negotiate immunity he was traded back to Gilead and ended up dead. In season 5 Blaine WAS offered a deal from Tuello which he took, but it did require that he remain in Gilead indefinitely. Throughout season 6 the presence of Wharton was inserted specifically to create an environment of coercive control that restricted and monitored his movements. So no I don’t believe he had full autonomy. It also seems incredibly odd for the writers to say that Blaine has full autonomy and THEN have Serena tell June “If he ever thought he had a choice, he would have chosen you”. I mean in what alternative dimension should an audience NOT be confused by this constant mixed messaging?

I was informed through various forms of PR, that the second Blaine knew his relationship was over with Osborne he’d simply sought to lose himself in power, but this was utterly ridiculous. Blaine had been confronted with the reality of losing her many times before and he still hadn’t stuck his face in a bucket of Kool Aid. The idea that Blaine had failed to show up and do anything about June being executed because he considered their relationship over, was laughable. In season 4 he’d strong armed Lawrence into keeping her alive even though he knew she “was never coming back to him”. In season 5 he dashed across the border and signed a contract with Tuello just to ensure her safety even though “she already has people who care for her, I’m nothing”. It didn’t wash. NONE of it washed. Now I MIGHT have been able to swallow that he’d taken solace in Gilead after his relationship with Osborne completely dissolved but there was no period of mourning for the loss of a deep abiding love he’d carried with him for 5 and half seasons. No tears, no despair, nothing….Instead Blaine immediately started rambling on about Gilead like it was Sale of the fucking Century and he couldn’t get enough of those Nazi war spoils. It was utterly baffling. Mid season we all travelled deep into the Twilight Zone when Blaine made some sort of schizophrenic switch from prioritising June to an unquenchable thirst for power. It was impossible to reconcile with his previous manifestation, but somehow this all remained my fault for failing to grasp it, rather than the writers for either not communicating it in earlier seasons or an ill advised quick change.

We were also told that Blaine was a villain because of his role in the original attacks and that well, because you had to be a bad guy to be promoted to a commander. Firstly; scenes of Blaine actually participating in the original attacks were cut and are now being cited as part of the character history, and I’m not sure that works in their favour, as the original ones show him being sick and stunned at the violence anyway. It read more like someone who’d been roped into something that had quickly turned nightmarish and of which he now couldn’t escape. In season 3 Blaine said about the government “they don’t give a shit about us” and “once you get in bed with the government, it’s not so easy to get out”, not REALLY the words of an enamoured loyalist. Secondly; Blaine was promoted from a Eye to a Commander as a form of punishment from Fred for his insubordination, to have him sent to the front to die. These two singular moments should have been definitively painted to follow the writers intention from the beginning, but they weren’t and as a result his characters role in Gilead's conception and growth remained hazy at best. Again, not the audiences fault, the writers. Creators can't keep claiming they had an active loyalist on their hands all along when everything they ever showed their audience said otherwise. They can't keep claiming it in the face of the source material which completely contradicts them.

It’s pretty telling that audiences aren’t so much sad as angry about it. Writers are doubling down because well, they don’t have much choice. What’s done is done and they’re never going to take any of it back or admit any shortcomings. They’re never going to admit they sidelined and significantly altered a character from the source material. They’re never going to admit they out right IGNORED their audience and then proudly claimed to be listening to them. After analysing all of the diatribe and reasoning that the cast, writers and show runners have put forth I’ve come to a few simple conclusions about why Blaine was killed off. Firstly: Certain individuals could not tolerate the idea of a woman leaving her husband for another man, I believe this stems from a deep seated theological indoctrination that is ingrained into American society and consequently into ALL of their writing. It’s most evident in their attitudes to sex and love and these moralistic shackles severely restrict all of their plot and character development. My advice, go and learn from some of our British friends, they know how to write and their final seasons don’t look like a dogs breakfast. Secondly: He was used as a scapegoat for the rest of the Gilead four. Put simply, they had to have at least one bad guy. They needed Aunt Lydia for The Testaments, Serena was a mommy and Whitford baggsied "Not It" apparently. The death of Fred in season 4 created the lack of a necessary antagonist for the protagonist, and these writers simply couldn't use Serena, Lydia or Lawrence. One was a mommy, one was performing a redemption arc and the other was too cuddly. Nick, as the "other man" made the perfect candidate, he was mysterious, inconvenient and could be twisted into a loyalist with some sneaky back tracking. Unfortunately the source material and previous seasons said otherwise, ultimately they should have gone with Lawrence or even Serena as the fall out has been horrendous. Thirdly: they wanted to make a political statement about young males being recruited into neo fascism in America today. They were not concerned about breaking with literary integrity, character construct or even narrative symbolism in order to achieve it. As someone who has taught analysis of media and literature, I can honestly say, they should have been concerned, because it definitely looks fucking broken and it will cost these creators.

I’m still reeling from the fact that so many gossamer threads in this vast story line which could have been pulled together beautifully, were instead clumsily tangled or just abandoned. Replaced instead with plot lines delivered with a clumsy ignorance of how the audience would actually feel. Which sick fuck thought that plane trip into the abyss should be the Casablanca ending they were referring to all along? I’d prefer to leave The Handmaid’s Tale behind me at the end of season 4. Even though some of the constructs of Blaine’s character were already incorrectly portrayed by this point, it was during season 5 that show runners decided to truly begin Blaine's slide from ambiguous ally to Gilead loyalist. One of the biggest appeals of Nick Blaine was his mystery but it seems that during these last 2 seasons show creators were intent on stripping him of it and reducing him to nothing but a 2 dimensional family man who just turned to water at the mere sight of a strong father figure.

Miller’s Wilderness was possibly one of the most amazing television season finales I’ve ever seen, and it just never got any better than that. It set the story line up beautifully to lead into The Testaments, and he could have simply walked straight into his spin off with a few cameos to smoothen the transition. I don’t know why those writers were so afraid of the character dynamic between Nick and June, it was extraordinary and we’ll be lucky to see one like it ever again. From the beginning there was something about these two that the audience emotionally engaged with and if the writers had been smarter they would have truly acknowledged and embraced it. Instead their relationships sudden end, and the death of Nick Blaine, will become the one thing that follows this series around, and sticks in the craw of many viewers for years to come.

[chronurgy]

I think that before Gortash and Durge started working together, they were both very lonely. And part of why their relationship is so intense is that they both see the other as the only person in the world who can handle them. The only other person in the world who could possibly understand them or be on their level, and to some degree, chosen as they are by evil gods, they're not really wrong.

Because as worshipers of dark gods, both Gortash and Durge have very specific paths laid out before them. As a worshiper of bane, gortash needs to become a tyrant - he needs to end up on top of the world. And as they said in the Prayer for Forgiveness, Durge is well aware that Bhaal created them to be the last soul alive.

But both of those things, being on top of the world and being the last soul alive, are very lonely ways to be. And I think both Gortash and Durge have both had periods in their lives where they were very lonely - Gortash in the house of hope (or frankly even before that, his parents hardly seemed loving) and Durge was likely treated more as an instrument than a person in the Bhaal cult. Neither of them want to be alone again, and after meeting the only other person in this world who can possibly be on their level, they seem to immediately set out to find ways to work the other person into their rigidly planned out lives.

Gortash genuinely plans to share power with with Durge, to rule alongside them. He gives you, his co-conspirator, his partner in crime, half the credit for the plans - calling them "our" plans. He's happy to hear you're alive, he's genuinely pleased to see you again, and he's ready pick right back up where you left off. He tests your resolve with the netherstones because he very specifically doesn't want another flunky, he wants an equal. He doesn't want to be alone up there on top of the world, with no one who could ever hope to understand him. He wants Durge right there with him and he's willing to commit a Banite sin (sharing power! the horror!) to get it.

And Durge, well, we saw the Prayer for Forgiveness. Durge plans to kill Gortash on Bhaal's altar, the same place they hope to die. I do think that Durge intended to kill Gortash last, and kill him slow. So that when they kill themselves he'll still be there. So they can die together, hand in bloody hand on that altar. Because being created to be the last soul alive is such a lonely fate, to know that you'll die completely alone, without even someone to hold your hand. And that is Durge's sin, the one small comfort they'd allow themselves - not dying alone, but dying with Gortash, holding his hand, knowing that there was someone there who loved them as they both breathed their last. Imagining dying in a loving embrace instead of alone in a cold world.

It's interesting to see how they both can't escape their gods plans for them (ruling and dying), can't bring themselves to imagine any other ending, but also go on to explicitly sin against their respective gods in the name of their relationship (ruling together, dying together). They're both drowning and they know they can't escape but goddammit they're going to go down together, the only two people in this world who can handle each other, the only two people who matter.