#He's still weird for eating a burger with hot tea

[ilikeyoualive]

Part 2 of the chapter 4 snippet. It's just dialogue since I haven't looked at this AU in a hot minute. If you're interested in more snippets or lore about the cryptid 141 AU, check out my Main Masterlist!

Warnings: Mentioned/Implied Cannibalism

Word Count: 318

Rule #4: Get Used to Weird Fucking Eating Habits.

"Whit's it taste like, Lt?" Soap asked, probably pushing his luck if the way that Ghost's gloved fingers flexed around his burger was any indication, but he was genuinely curious about Ghost's sense of taste.

"That's a fucked up question, MacTavish." (Ghost)

"Huh? Whit, no. Ah meant the burger." (Soap)

"You want to know what a burger tastes like to me?" (Ghost)

"Aye, sir." (Soap)

"It tastes dead." (Ghost)

"Aw, c'mon Lt, ye can do better than tha’." (Soap)

"My tastebuds don't register the condiments or the vegetables beyond the texture. Bread an’ cheese is the same." (Ghost)

"So ye only actually get any sort ae flavor from the meat?" (Soap)

"Affirmative." (Ghost)

"Then why don't ye eat the meat an' toss the rest?" (Soap)

"Wasteful." (Ghost)

"Hang on, if ye cannae taste shite, then how can ye compliment mah cookin’?" (Soap)

"I can taste spices on the meat if it's a dry rub or a marinade." (Ghost)

"So ye were ratin’ mah cookin’ based on the flavor ae the meat?" (Soap)

"Yes an’ no." (Ghost)

"Whit?" (Soap)

"I could taste the seasonin on the meat, yes. But I could also tell that the noodles were cooked an’ that the vegetables were soft because ov their texture." (Ghost)

"Now tha's interestin’." (Soap)

"Is it?" (Ghost)

"Seems that yer tastebuds work, but they're just picky." (Soap) "Bet ye had tae practice, 'cause if ye cannae taste, ye cannae differentiate good food from bad food unless ye teach yerself how.”

"Wasn't always like this, Johnny." (Ghost)

"So ye remember whit food tastes like?" (Soap)

"Sometimes." (Ghost)

"Fish 'n chips?" (Soap)

"What abou’ ‘em?" (Ghost)

"Do ye remember the taste?" (Soap)

"Negative." (Ghost)

"Scones then? Ye tea freaks love yer dry-ass treats." (Soap)

"Fuckin' ‘ell, Johnny." (Ghost)

"Wait, whit about tea? Why do ye still drink it?" (Soap)

"It smells good. It's warm. It's a habit from before." (Ghost)

"Huh." (Soap)

[missmusicmary]

The Southern Table Athens, AL

Sunday Brunch menu

Since moving to Athens, Alabama (a surprising omen I believe may hint at me one day moving to Athena, Greece), my boyfriend and I have been on a hunt of what places excite our tastebuds. As odd as it may be to begin with a huge photo of a glass of sweet tea, in the south a good glass of tea is art. This glass of tea was pure diabetis (and yes, I am referencing the diabetis meme). This is the first glass of tea we have had that we approved of. Now when we walk around the town square on a blistering hot and humid day, we have a goto stop for a southern water.

First up:

Fried Green Tomatoes

Be warned, pimento cheese is also on top of them, ew. However, nothing alittle scraping action did not fix!

Although unpictured, there were seven tomatoes perfectly fried in a cornmeal batter. The aioli was amazing! It was zesty, tangy, and inviting. I actually beat my boyfriend to most of them!

Main yum:

Southern Burger

Some say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and some chefs say we eat with our eyes first.

The meal started off great with my boyfriend being so excited mentioning the chef's detail of the most wonderfully toasted top bun. Not to mention the same aioli from the fried green tomatoes! However, the joy was short lived. The bottom bun was burnt, a disappointment he went on about randomly for the rest of the day. Bacon, the salty mouth watering crunch that always brightens up a meal. Bacon, a meat that people compete on cooking. Bacon, an important ingredient that gives fat, salinity, crunch, and smokiness. The Southern Table must have missed the memo on what bacon should be, on what bacon could be. Their bacon tasted as if it was cooked an hour prior and sat on a hot plate to get soggy. There is a difference on purposefully flaccid bacon versus bacon not maintained to keep the integrity of its cook. The onion rings were under seasoned, while the fries were on the edge of tasting fresh. Atleast the fries were making me come back for more of them.

Chicken Biscuit Gravy

This dish has so much potential to be a heart fluttering explosion. These elements are my favorite things to eat!

My first bite of the biscuit and gravy had me question my food pallet. I am used to a homemade gravy, sometimes spiced with ground pepper for what I know as a traditionally southern peppered gravy. Lord knows my mother adds too much pepper. She even burnt most bacon, and because of that, I do not mind eating burnt crispy meat at times! However, this gravy was so unexpected I dived back in a few times throughout the meal to assess my feelings. This gravy is an onion gravy, with limited salt and no pepper. I am honestly not sure it is from scratch due to the sauce looking broken. The biscuit looked and tasted dense. It was pure Bisquick mix. I was really looking forward to a fresh biscuit considering all the photos the business posts. I know there are different kind of biscuits, but I was still trying to assess where the funky taste was coming from, that I did not focus on the biscuit until later in the meal. I eventually figured out the weird taste was onions in the gravy, and a huge metallic and salty taste in the biscuit. They were probably trying to hide the fact it tasted like Bisquick.

The fried chicken. Oh the love of my taste buds since I was a toddler. The one thing my family could always count on. My 'emergency frozen food' that is ALWAYS in the freezer. Such high high hopes. The chicken was moist, and yet rubbery. The flavor of a fast food joint I have not pinpointed yet. The batter looked old, the way it congealed to the chicken reminded me of post freezer burned frozen chicken.

Lastly, the potatoes. Frozen, over cooked, maybe double cooked, and sat in a hot plate. No way the potatoes are fresh.

Ketchup. Thank you ketchup.

My ending feelings are mixed. Maybe our bad experiences were due to arriving 30 minutes after opening, or the fact it was a brunch menu. I will always go back for the tea and fried green tomatoes. That is a definite. As far as brunch again, I would rather cook at home. I am willing to return for dinner, even though it is expensive, to determine if it is a menu that fills me with happiness.

Appetizer: 11/10

Main: 3/10

Honorable mentions: sweet tea and aioli

[wings-of-life]

Pap simply winked at Angel, absolutely planning on playing out this bit through to the end. Besides, she had her hands full with Null. Literally and figuratively. The least he could do was pass out some food. "Coming right up. One tea for the lovely lady and one of everything for the dashing grayscale fellow." He got Angel's tea for her first, then set out one of each drink for Null. After that he gathered a plate with a little piece of each dish on it and handed that over to the small skeleton as well. "Bone appetite buddy." Only after that did he get anything for himself, picking up a hot cat with fond amusement to munch on. And then after a second of hesitation grabbing a slice of pie to eat after as well.

A bit of darker gray dusted Null's cheeks as he was called dashing, though he still giggled at Pap's over the top antics. The other skeleton was doing a good job at putting his anxious mind at ease regarding strangers. When everything was set out in front of him he looked at it in wonder, his eyes wide and filled with awe. He was so consumed by the sight of it all that he didn't even react to what he otherwise would've found to be a pretty funny pun. He glanced at Angel one more time, almost giving her a look like he couldn't believe all of this was actually okay for him to have, but then he released her hand so he could start to eat. The first thing he ended up trying was some fries and he made a happy little sound after putting one in his mouth, his feet kicking in the air from where they hung off the edge of the stool. Oh! That was really good! It wasn't too overwhelming but it still tasted very different than anything he'd had before. He kept trying the rest of the food in a similar manner, taking his time with each one. All of the sweet things he ended up loving, and they were the most familiar tasting as well since the only kind of food he'd had previously had been candy. Yet they were all still so different! It kept blowing his mind over and over again how there was yet another flavor to discover every time. The snail dish made him scrunch up his face when he tried it. The taste was weird and different already, but the texture was what was incredibly bizarre. He wasn't sure he liked that one very much....he still took a second bite though, he was too curious not to. Yeah, no, not a favorite. After having tried everything Null turned to Angel with a huge smile on his face, holding a cup of hot chocolate close to his chest that he had decided was his favorite of the drinks (it was sweet and yummy and it made you feel all warm?! Yes he loved it). "Th-thank you so much Angel! Th-this is a-amazing. I've n-never tasted anything l-like all this b-before."

This dork. She smiled fondly at Pap as he kept up his charade, thanking him when put the cup before her. She wrapped her free hand around the ceramic as it took on the temperature of the tea. Pins and needles all over her hand and up her arm but she kept a hold of it. The warmth was too good to surrender. Her fingers had gotten so cold exposed to the open air as she'd guided Null to Snowdin. She should've brought a pair of gloves, but she'd always managed by just putting her hands in her pockets, so she hadn't given it any thought.

She smiled and nodded at Null when he looked up at her after having been served a plate of everything giving his hand one last squeeze as she felt him letting go. She wrapped her now free hand around her cup as well and watched him try everything on his plate. Once the feeling had returned to her fingers she waited for Pap to take a bite of his hot cat before grabbing herself a plate and one of Grillby's burgers. As good as Mettaton was with his fast food, Grillby's burgers and fries still reigned supreme in her book.

She almost chuckled at the way Null's face scrunched up when he tried the snails, but she managed to catch herself. Though the amusement was clear in her eyes. She'd tried to discourage her mum from making that dish as well, but she insisted. Oh well, whatever was left of the snails she knew dad would be more than happy to take off her hands. She was eyeing the pie, trying to figure out if she could grab a piece of it without having to get up or ask Pap. She didn't mind asking Pap but she as just in the mood to be a bit of a butt when Null spoke again. "I'm glad you like it. What's your favourite so far? Or is it too difficult to choose?"

All I want for Gyftmas

[sharmrocksims]

Grayson started getting hungry so we took a lunch break. He ran across the street and grabbed a Turkey burger with a hot Peach Black Tea (questionable combo but who am I to judge LOL). I quickly ate a protein bar and continued to drink my water while he was gone. I felt like classic Eddie Murphy from RAW, because he seemed to laugh at every joke I had. 

[newcaptainofsquad9]

I Can’t Handle You Being Back~Chou Tzuyu x black! fem! reader {2}

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5

Pairing: Tzuyu x reader

Summary: Your first night as a Twice member sought you connecting with the women you once knew as trainees. Well into the night, you bond a bit with your group members, even Tzuyu would it seems doesn’t want much to do with you anymore.

Genre: Angst, Idol-Verse, Romance, Slow Burn, Hurt and Comfort, Best Friends to Lovers

Warnings: none

Word Count: 2, 380

Writer’s Note: There’s interaction with Tzuyu in this chapter! If have any Twice, Blackpink, Red Velvet or Dreamcatcher requests just send me a message and I’ll try to get it done. Hope ya’ll enjoy!

Odd wasn’t the right word; it felt unknown falling back into a groove with them. The only member I kept in contact with was Nayeon and Sana, even then we didn’t talk much. It only went to check ins on how music was going, along with the occasional ‘miss you here in Korea’ or ‘working with this American artist right now.’ 

Being in the dorms feels weird. I’m supposed to be a member now,  I’m fortunate enough to have this opportunity again. (Even if this opportunity will potentially ruin my online presence; the Korean Netizens are still a handful.) That’s the least of my worries right now. Tzuyu’s blank stare continues to jumble up, down, left then right in my mind as I stare up the ceiling of me, Jeongyeon and Momo’s room. How the hell am I supposed to even fall into conversation with her? the rest of them? They were all my competition five years ago and I believed most of them to not like me. Of course it was the reason of being American, but also of being Black; a foreign trainee that quite literally stuck out from the others. From the welcome a few hours ago, they all seemed to remain fond of me (excluding Tzuyu, one that hurts the most). 

“Y/N?” 

I nearly fall from the bed at the presence of the few of my members: Jihyo and Jeongyeon stand in the doorway with huge hoodies and weary smiles aimed at me. 

“Hey guys,” I say with a grin. 

“Hey,” Jihyo says as she sits on the edge of the bed. “We just wanted to check up on you. You’ve been cooped up in here for hours.”  

Jeongyeon crossed her arms as she leans against the wall. 

“Are you OK?” she says. “We know that this is a huge shift for you.”

I nod and sit up to fully face them both. 

“It’s more than I shift,” I explain. “I thought my K-Pop career was over with that Sixteen elimination and--” I pause to keep the image of Tzuyu and Momo’s tear stained faces from their own eliminations; they’re both moments from the program. Just being in their presence again, after so much success and growth they’ve had is nerve wracking.   

Jihyo scoots closer and puts an arm around me. Jeongyeon steps over, kneels down in front of me and takes my hand. 

“Tell us what’s on your mind,” Jeongyeon says. 

“This a safe space,” Jihyo reassures. “We’re here to listen. All of us.”

I nod at her words, yet my mouth can’t help but spill words that should have been left unsaid. 

“What about Tzuyu? She hardly looked at me.” I say. 

Jihyo’s eyes softened; she squeezes me a bit tighter. 

“She’ll come around, trust me,” Jihyo says. 

Jeongyeon nodded sharply. 

“Are you hungry? The managers dropped us off some burgers if you’d like to eat with everyone,” Jeongyeon suggests. 

“Yeah,” Jihyo says. “We can catch up, it’s been so long.”

I agree with a hum, but I don’t attempt to get up when Jeongyeon and Jihyo do. 

“C’mon Y/N, please?” Jeongyeon asks. “You have to eat and we’re teammates now, everyone needs to know how you’re getting through this.”

 “You’re an idol now, Jihyo says. “And more importantly, a member of Twice. No matter how Tzuyu feels about the situation, you’re here and she has to accept that.”

I can’t help but giggle at Jihyo’s sense of authority; a perfect leader for Twice, it’s nice to hear that she sees me as a member, even though I’m still new to this. 

“C’mon can we go?” Jeongyeon groans. “I’m starving.” 

Jihyo rolls her eyes at Jeongyeon playfully before reaching for my hand. 

“Are you ready, Y/N?” 

My smile widens at Jihyo’s easygoing grin as she nudges me with her elbow and flutters her eyes. I take it; she erupts in a quick fit of giddiness and drags me out of my room, downstairs then into the living room where the other girls await. 

“Y/N!” Sana squeals. She shot up towards me, embracing me just as tight as she did eariler.

“Uh, hi Sana!” I say while noticing the Mcdonalds cup in her hand. 

Sana frowns as she sips. 

“You all right?” she asks. “I forgot you’re American and kind of weird about skinship.” 

“It’s ok, it’s just a little jarring,” I admit. “Being back here. You guys got Mcdonalds?” 

Chaeyoung nods, hops off the couch from her seat between Dahyun and Tzuyu to shift in the giant bag of greasy (yet not as much grease as America) goodies. 

“We haven’t really been studying a lot of American culture,” Chaeyoung explains. “But I do know that it’s complicated, especially with you being a Black American. So we opted with something simple, Mcdonalds!” 

“We didn’t really know what you usually ate there, so the managers ordered everything for you!” Nayeon declares as she threw an arm around my shoulders. 

My eyes scan through the various burgers/sandwiches, nugget boxes and an array of shakes; flavors range here in Korea, similar to how it is in other Mcdonalds across the globe. The gesture alone makes my chest warm, tears cling to the edge of my eyes but I stop them. They care; regardless what they thought about me five years ago, they still care about me. 

“Thank you guys, it means a lot,” I say. 

They all utter out a ‘you’re welcome’ in unison; Chaeyoung, Nayeon and Sana huddle toward me, pulling me in a mini group hug. Jihyo, Mina, Momo and Dahyun join soon after, squeezing me a little too tight. 

“C’mon guys, let the woman eat,” Jeongyeon mutters through a few fries as she grabs a six piece nugget for herself. 

As everyone plus away, I catch Tzuyu’s eyes from the couch. An instant but I got it: it wasn’t blank like before, rather wonder prior to her turning her attention back to the green tea shake she was consuming. I want to ask her a question, anything to hear her voice again but Jihyo’s words come back. She’ll accept it, no matter how she feels. I’m not sure how I completely feel about it though. Deep down I care about her feelings, hell she was the first person to build me up as an artist who could break international barriers. Even though they were teenagers then with over zealous dreams, it was nice to have some to dream big with (it meant more to bond with someone from another country and become so close). 

“Y/N?” Jihyo’s question breaks me from my thoughts.  

“Are you still jet lagged or something?” Mina teases as she nibbles on half of a cookie. 

“Huh? No, this is still a lot,” I say. “What was the question?” 

“I was just wondering if you wanted to binge a bunch of Disney movies with us?” Momo says. 

I giggle at how enthusiastic Momo is. 

“Would one of them happen to be Monsters Inc?” I ask.

Momo flushes, plays with her hands and glances down at the floor. 

“Maybe,” she mumbles. “How’d you know?” 

I’m the one that flusters this time: my chest grows hot as I scratch the back of my head. 

“I’ve kept up with you guys,” I say. “You have so many plushies from fansigns and your dog’s named Boo, like the character.” 

“You’ll meet him soon!” Nayeon coos. “He’s so adorable.”   

“You could have reached out more,” Sana says. “We could have invited you on tour and caught up sooner.” 

“Maybe I could have, but you know how weird Jinyoung can get,” I say. “I still can’t believe he granted me this opportunity. Ever since Sixteen I-” 

With my pause this time, all nine of them granting me a look of concern; Jihyo grasps my hand again and gives me a tiny grin.

“Take your time,” she whispers. “We have enough time to catch up.”

The others nod and give their own sympathetic looks, except Tzuyu; she keeps her attention to the ground, face clouded what I cannot assume at all. (A face as blank as it was earlier.) I decide to finish though. It’s like Jihyo said, I’m a part of this team now. 

“After Sixteen, I believed myself not to be talented enough,” I say. “It took me months to get out of my creative slump and write songs again. I guess my talent was there, or maybe I wasn’t at a decent level for JYP or Korea itself to accept a Black woman in K-Pop. I’m not even sure if they’re ready now.”

“They are OK,” Chaeyoung declares. “And if they aren’t, we’ll make them!”

I know Chaeyoung’s being supportive, yet I can’t help but giggle at how her cheeks puff out while she’s chewing on her chicken nugget. She’s so passionate that it’s cute.

“And if not, you aren’t alone Y/N,” Jihyo says as she softly nudges me. 

“Enough about dwelling on the past,” Jeongyeon says. “Let’s start watching some films!” 

“Which film should we start with, Y/N?” Momo asks. 

“Hm? I thought you wanted to start with Monster Inc Momoring?” Mina says. 

Momo shrugs with a growing smile and sunk down in the couch beside Tzuyu. 

“Y/N should choose, it’s all about making her feel comfortable. Right?” she says. 

I give her my best smile while I bite through the Big Mac, which I probably won’t be able to eat for awhile. 

“How’s Lion King sound?”

Everyone utters in agreement: they all grab more food and sweets before hopping to the couch to bunch in while Jihyo grabs the TV’s remote. I glance between the end of the couch, where most of the maknae’s are.This excludes Tzuyu, who’s seated in the middle of the couch, dodging Nayeon’s spoon as she tries to feed the maknae some of her ice cream.

“Y/N! Sit over here!” Sana shouts, solving my dilemma for good as she and Jeongyeon slide away from each other to make room for me in between them.

“Gosh, unnie I said no!” Tzuyu growls. 

I flinch along with Nayeon as Tzuyu rises and stomps up the stairs. 

“Nayeon,” Jihyo warns. “Now I have to go talk to her. Go on and start the movie without me.”    

She follows Tzuyu’s trail as Jeongyeon scolds Nayeon herself. 

“Told you to quiet messing with her,” she says. “Not all of us can take your insistent flirting.” 

Nayeon rolls her eyes. 

“She kept eyeing Sana’s milkshake I thought she wanted some of mine,” she explains. “I know she couldn’t take her eyes off of Y/N’s buns either.” 

Nayeon sends me a wink and I sink down deeper into the chair. 

“Nayeon, please not now,” I groan. 

Jihyo returns just as quickly, her face fixed tight in irritation. 

“She’s not coming back to watch movies with us,” she says. “Let’s just carry on.”

*            *           *

We’re halfway through Monster University, and I keep nodding off every now and then. I get a bit disoriented when Sully popped up, then Nemo--who knows how many films I slept through. 

“She’s so cute,” Sana coos. “She can rest her head on my shoulder if you want to switch unnie.”

Jeongyeon shakes her head as she pats my head and allows me to lay it back on her own shoulder.

“If you’re tired Y/N, you can go back to our room and sleep,” Jeongyeon whispers. “Momo and I won’t bother you, I promise.”

I sit up to stretch, noticing Tzuyu quickly grab something from the fridge and hurry back up the steps. Jihyo pinches the bridge of her nose, then sighs.

“Just let her be,” she says. “I can try talking to her later.”

I should listen to Jihyo, yet my body has a mind of it’s own. I’m on Tzuyu’s heels in an instant, grabbing her wrist in the next.  She freezes; I do the same. 

“T-Tzuyu, please. Can we talk?” I ask. 

Tzuyu turns to me. Her face isn’t blank, but carries a look of exhaustion. 

“How have you been?” I say, trying to start somewhere. 

“I’ve been better,” Tzuyu says as she continues up the steps and toward her bedroom. “You should sleep.” 

“I-I’m not tired.”

Tzuyu gives me an incredulous look. 

“Sana and Jeongyeon unnie are so loud,” she says. “You could barely get through a couple of films.” 

I flush at her words, at least she’s being somewhat emotional with me.

“I know Nayeon can be a bit much, but you could have stayed and watched--”

“Nayeon unnie was only part of the reason I left,” she says. “I needed my space and I still do.”  

“What’s the other reason?” 

Tzuyu’s face softens at the question.

“Y/N--”

“Is it me?” I say. “I had no idea that I--”

Tzuyu cut me off before I could finish, her face taunt in rage similar to how she reacted with Nayeon earlier. 

“Of course you have no idea!” she says. “You were one of the only friends I had back then, even when elimination was imminent, you promised me you would have stayed!”

Her words are like iron branding marks underneath my skin. She’s saying something now, but how can I make it right? What can I do to make sure that I don’t lie to her again. 

“I know Tzuyu but--”

“That’s the thing Y/N, you don’t know,” Tzuyu says. “It took me so long to get over you leaving. And now, I can’t seem to handle you being here again.” 

The iron presses deeper and deeper. My mouth closes. Maybe I should try again later, and honor her request. However, Jihyo’s words come fluttering back; we’re a team and if Tzuyu has a problem, we have to deal with it. Talk it out like partners should. I flush a bit at the word. Tzuyu and I dreamed of being more than partners, it’s now a distant memory due to how resentful she feels. 

“Well, I’m not over you Tzuyu,” I say. “I’ll leave you alone for now, but just know that I never got over you. You still mean at lot to me.”

Tzuyu stands still for a moment, face still taunt in anger but it changes, and softens. I would have stayed to see it, but I honor her request and walk back to my room.   

[oatmealcrisp-freak]

“Hey mom,” Yuuta called out as he got in through the door, peeling off his shoes. “Did you know Kusuo has a daughter?”

That was still so wild to him. The idea of his surly older brother figure with a little baby, it was just wild. 

“Huh?” His mom came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a cloth. She looked older, her face lined, grey at her hairline. Whenever Yuuta came home from school to spend time with her, it never failed to startle him. Make him think about life. Make him worry, a little. Make him realise how much he took for granted. 

It was the reason why he came home.

“Oh yes,” She gasped and touched her palm to her cheek. “Oh I did hear about that, yes, from Kurumi. Did I not tell you? I’m sorry, love, that must have been a shock! Is he here?”

“You may’ve told me,” He said, toeing into his slippers then coming over to kiss her cheek with a smile. “I just might not’ve been paying attention. But no, he’s not here. I, uh, I called him to see if he could drop by for a visit but he’s a little. Well, unavailable.”

His mom laughed. “Yes, babies have a way of taking over an otherwise free schedule.”

Then she tilted her head at him, and considered him. Yuuta fought not to blanch. So soon on the tiptoes of Kusuo’s penetrative and stern looks, it was a bit much to take in. He looked away. He didn’t think he was in trouble… She wasn’t going to get on him about drinking again, was she?

But no, instead she reached up and carded some hair away from his forehead, plucking at it from under the brim of his beanie.

“Are you okay, dear?”

He blinked at her. “Huh?”

“Well, I know you’re all grown up now, but you’ve never really had to deal with this before, being an only child, and I know how much you look up to Kusuo.” She frowned a touch, then laughed a little. “You’ve never had to share him.”

“Mom!” He cried out, going beet red hot in an instant. “Don’t make it sound weird, it’s not like he’s my dad.”

His mom’s expression flattened and she looked to the side. “He may as well have been.”

“Ah.” Momentarily blinkered by the sarcasm, Yuuta blinked, then laughed, at least a little. It wasn’t like she was wrong. “Well. I guess. But I’m fine. What, you think I’d be jealous of a little baby?”

Then to steer away from the subject that he was, actually, and how utterly, embarrassingly, juvenile of him that was, Yuuta dropped his jaw theatrically. “Did you hear how he got her?”

His mom’s brows nearly breached her hairline at his look of shock. She shook her head. 

“No, why?”

“Someone left her in a hokora at his bus stop.” He said, wandering by her into the kitchen.

She gasped. “No!”

“Yes!” Yuuta snorted as he started to shovel coffee jellies into the fridge. “Social services bullied him into keeping her. Can you believe it?”

“Oh. Well?”

His mom’s tentative tone made Yuuta turn around to find her musing eyes tilted toward the ceiling as she tapped her chin. She caught his look and shrugged with a little humorous smile, draping the towel over her shoulder. She wandered over to him and Yuuta watched as she reached out-

And then brutally pinched his cheek, making him squawk.

“I can, yes. He’s always had a way with lost children!” 

“Augh, MOM, I was five, c’mon, gerroff!”

She released him but not before giving an evil, witchy cackle that made him pout, because she was never going to let him live that down, was she? Still, it allowed him to pop up to his feet and check out the freezer.

“What are we having for dinner?” He asked, even as he opened the door. “Do we have burgers?”

A few minutes later he was wandering up to his room with a cup of tea and a cup of coffee jelly that he had to perform the duty of eating himself, now. Yuuta shut his door behind him.

He turned and leaned his forehead against it with a sigh, shoulders drooping. A moment later he opened his eyes, looking at the white painted wood but not really, his gaze distant in his thoughts.

‘He’s gonna be a good dad.’ 

Yuuta knew that much. Like his mom had said, Kusuo, even as a highschooler, had stepped neatly into that role for him since his own father was far too busy at work to ever be around. He’d been so mature, even then. The idea that he might struggle was laughable, especially with his powers.

His powers.

Yuuta chewed his lip.

‘I wonder how that’s going to work with his powers?’ He thought, pulling away from the door and wandering over to his desk. He sat down and sipped at his tea, booting up his laptop and stooping over to grab his notebooks out of his bag next to his chair. 

‘It’s a miracle it never got out when I was a brat, with how big of a blabbermouth I was.’ Still am. He winced at the reminder that this whole thing was technically the fault of his little flash fiction assignment. ‘Who knows how that’s going to work with another kid with loose lips?’

Sure it wasn’t unlike an adult to dismiss a child who said their big brother, or their daddy in this case, had super powers and shh, don’t tell anybody, but the moment anyone started actually paying attention to Kusuo, the moment anyone looked a little closer, the moment anything happened to the man’s daughter that went a little sideways-

Well, if Kusuo were a character in one of Yuuta’s novels, that would be the reveal.

It made him want to claw at the walls with anxiety.

He still didn’t know if he bought that bullshit about the kid’s mom being so out of options that a hokora looked good, either. There was no way in hell Yuuta’s blog was interdimensional.

God, Kusuo really couldn’t help himself, could he? Yuuta secretly wondered if his big brother secretly had a masochistic craving for getting himself into trouble.

“Betcha anything it wouldn’t be a problem if Kusuo didn’t actually help the people who came a’knocking. Whose fault is it really, bro?” Yuuta grumbled beneath his breath, then took another sip of his tea to shake off the thought because for all that his big bro was a surly asshole, he was too sweet, too kind, to not help. 

A sucker, in other words, one that even Yuuta’s childhood self had sniffed out from a mile away. One crank on the waterworks was all it ever took. Hell, even the guy’s own dad had it figured out and that guy was three books short of a full shelf.

No, he tried to hide it, because Kusuo knew it, probably knew it better than anyone, but Yuuta’s big brother really was too kind for his own good. All alone up there with his chickens and cat, for a good long time it’d seemed like nobody but a select chosen few would ever get to know that secret.

And now a random little girl would get to see the benefit of it.

Yuuta worked over the strange, possessive discomfort that gave him, shaking his head. What a bizarre thing, to be jealous of an infant.

He had to hand it to the kid’s luck, though. If there was anyone Yuuta could’ve picked to be a good dad, Kumi had nailed it in one.

Yuuta couldn’t help but remember Kusuo’s reassurances. Kusuo never looked warm, his favourite expression was a scowl, but he’d shed that persona then. He’d shed it easily for a smile. Yuuta snorted and shook his head, casting aside his worries in favour of his essay.

His big brother seemed happier.

Underneath it all, Yuuta was glad for him.

Little preview of the next Single chapter cus uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk when the rest is gonna happen SO HERE

“Big brother,” Yuuta said with complete seriousness. “Why do you have a baby.”

Kusuo debated. It took him about three seconds.

He said, “Why shouldn’t I have a baby?”

Yuuta squinted. It was hilarious to watch the kid’s face work as he mulled over the riddle Kumi presented, one which Kusuo had decided not to answer so easily because this was all Yuuta’s fault, really, at the end of the day. It was his little bit of fanfiction slash creative writing project that’d gone viral and meant people were leaving Kusuo prayers at the hokora after all. Why he’d even posted it on his blog to begin with Kusuo wasn’t sure, certainly it wasn’t poorly written but what it was was embarrassing.

He ignored the flash of intuition that said to look at the hokora. Not for the first time today, either. He was tired, damnit, and still dealing with the other o-

Yuuta said, “Did you kidnap a baby?”

Kusuo’s jaw dropped in offense. “What? No! Why would you even say such a thing?”

Kumi’s presence in his home was entirely legal, thank you very much.

“Well you’re not married and last I checked, you’re still more interested in dating coffee jelly over people,” Yuuta said, grinning ear to ear but there was a tick in his eyebrow that told Kusuo he was, for some reason, not as happy as the rest of his face told. “So it’s not like you could conceive naturally. She doesn’t look like a clone, or like an experiment your older brother cooked up, so that only leaves one option.”

Yuuta ducked closer to the phone and raised his hand to hide his mouth from the side, pretending to a slyness he really didn’t actually have. “Do you need help burying the bodies?”

Kusuo stared.

Sometimes Yuuta’s imagination was a little frightening. He could only guess what the kid must be thinking for him to ask something like that.

As if Kusuo would ever need help disposing of remains. Tch. But anyways.

He sighed as Yuuta cracked up into laughter, no doubt his so called ‘little brother’ was enjoying teasing him. Fine. He’d let the kid get the one up over him this time.

Even though calling Yuuta a kid was a bit of a misnomer by now. He was in college after all. Just about done, too.

“The only body around here worth burying is yours, kid.” Kusuo said, looking down at his little girl. 

She looked confused, insomuch as an infant could look confused, and he could feel her developing mind cranking hard in an attempt to figure out where the brand new voice was coming from.

“What?! Mine?” Yuuta squawked.

Successfully distracted from his daughter’s cute little face, Kusuo looked into his phone. He even arched an eyebrow, for the benefit of appearing arch. 

“Yours. You’ll never guess,” Kusuo lifted Kumi a touch. “What I found at a certain hokora, in the rain, with a cup of coffee jelly.”

His intuition pinged again. He ignored it. Again. It was easy, because Yuuta’s face was falling into a very entertaining cringe that told Kusuo yes, he understood. He understood very well.

“Ah.” Yuuta said.

“Ah.” Kusuo agreed.

“But that’s insane,” Yuuta said a handful of minutes later. “Why on earth would a person leave a baby in a hokora?”

Kusuo shrugged as he poured himself a cup of coffee, one eye on Kumi’s nearly sleeping face, the other on the coffee pot. The phone levitated to his left, keeping Yuuta’s face in view.

“As far as I can tell they may not even be from earth. Our earth, anyway.” Kusuo said, setting down the coffee pot and starting on doctoring it to his preferences. “Her mother has uncontrollable psychic powers that tear her around dimension after dimension. I’m not altogether unfamiliar with it, it’s a bit of a pain. Not a suitable environment for raising a baby in, at all.”

His intuition again. Uhg, it was so itchy today. Leave him alone.

“So she left it in the rain? No, I still don’t buy it, not when she knew enough about our world to get you a coffee jelly,” Yuuta, lover of sci-fi anime and flexible punch-roller-wither, said. “If she knows about coffee jelly then certainly she knows about police, why not leave the baby there?”

There was an undercurrent to Yuuta’s voice that made Kusuo’s other sense of intuition perk up to nag at him, his more earthly sense, the one that had known instinctively that punks were trying to hassle him when he’d been oh so temporarily powerless all the way back in high school. It made him look up into the camera after he finished preparing his coffee. It made him look at Yuuta’s face. The boy was a man now, tanned from the outdoors, his green hair cut short but still long enough to flip out from under the edges of his beanie. His jaw was stronger, and his shoulders wider, but those big green eyes were looking, somehow, someway, very five years old.

“Yuuta,” Kusuo said. “What’s the matter?”

Yuuta appeared taken aback. He puffed himself up.

“Well. It’s just not right, leaving a baby like tha-”

“That’s not what I’m talking about Yuuta, and you know it.” Kusuo said around a sip of his coffee, his unblinking eyes now fully focused on the young man before him.

Yuuta blinked. He looked down, then, avoiding his eyes, and Kusuo knew immediately that something was definitely up. Yuuta only ever avoided his eyes like that when he’d been caught out at something.

Some things really never changed.

Yuuta blew out a sigh. He smiled. He looked a bit embarrassed. “It’s nothing.” He said.

“Then it’s nothing to talk about it,” Kusuo said, getting a bit irritated because uhg, if this was nothing if just not him, prying at people’s problems like he wanted more of them. 

But this was Yuuta. If there was anyone Kusuo should be allowed to prod and pry at, he decided, it was Yuuta. Payback, fair and square and such, right? Right.

Yuuta scratched his cheek with a short laugh. “Well. When you put it like that. Uh.”

He sighed and dropped the pretence of a smile, his shoulders slouching.

“I’m just. Being silly, I think. Really, it’s-it’s nothing. I’m. Just.”

Yuuta forced another short laugh. “I mean, I called you up for help on my homework cus you’re always good for that, but.”

He looked down, probably at his feet if Kusuo had to guess.

“It’s not like you can just drop everything to come help me anymore.”

Ah.

Hm.

So this was a bit awkward.

“You’re jealous of Kumi,” Kusuo surmised, perhaps a little too abrupt to be gentle but, well, he’d never been the gentle sort and Yuuta knew that. Still, it hurt to see the kid drop a short flinch, but then Yuuta was flushing hot around the ears and Kusuo knew that even without the aid of his telepathy for all this distance, he was right.

“It’s silly, right? I mean. She’s a baby. And I’m definitely not that anymore. But.” Yuuta’s shoulders rode in a onesided shrug. “I guess in some ways I must still be a kid, to be jealous of your kid like this. I mean, we’re not even related, like at all, and it’s not like you’re my dad, it’s just.”

Then Yuuta sighed, a long and tragic affair indeed, and looked up at Kusuo with eyes that made him want to flinch because it was those very eyes that’d sucker punched him how many years ago now, when Yuuta had been barely five years old and whimpering up at the sky after his lost balloon. Good grief, he was such a sucker.

“You’re still my big brother, right?” 

Ah… Ah hell. 

What else could he say to that, what else could he do? 

But bear the uncomfortable brunt of reassuring another person.

Kusuo smiled. 

He said, 

“Of course.”

Yuuta blinked, looking a little flummoxed, but then shortly relieved and he coughed into his fist, itching at a bottom eyelid and pretending he wasn’t a little teary eyed. Kusuo’s smile quirked to the left and he shook his head.

“I might not be able to teleport to be there in an instant anymore, Yuuta, you’re right about that. But that doesn’t mean I can’t still help you with your homework. We just have to do things the, uh, normal way.”

“I guess you’re right about that.” Yuuta sighed then the background behind him stopped moving, signifying that he’d stopped walking, and Kusuo got to recognize the buildings behind him as their old stomping grounds. Even like this, his old neighbourhood was nostalgic to look at for some reason. “That’s still too bad though.”

Kusuo blinked. “How come?”

Yuuta lifted a plastic bag and looked at it with an atrocious pout. “What am I going to do with all this coffee jelly? You know I can’t stand the stuff.”

Kusuo’s jaw dropped, but he shortly picked it up again, but he also didn’t know what to say, and he was sure he looked very consternated right now indeed because Yuuta was cracking up, the brat.

[pinktintedmonocle]

Solidity - A Cobra Kai Fanfic

Daniel is running himself ragged, so Johnny intervenes.

Domestic Lawrusso fluff.

While this works as a standalone story there are a few vague references in it to A Standing Appointment so it can be read as a sort of sequel to that fic.

Johnny first noticed it one night when they were making out on the couch.

He curled a hand round Daniel’s waist and was surprised at how small it felt, how far his fingers reached. As the kiss intensified and he picked Daniel up, Johnny noticed how light the other man was.  Far lighter than Johnny remembered him being.

That night, Johnny had studied Daniel while he slept (he figured it wasn’t creepy if he was doing it out of genuine concern).  Daniel’s face was definitely thinner, his cheekbones sharper.  Johnny pulled back the bedsheets to inspect Daniel’s torso and was shocked to see how prominent his ribs were.  How had he not noticed before?  How had this happened?  It wasn’t as if they didn’t eat properly; since they had moved in together Johnny’s diet had improved considerably due to Daniel’s claim that hot pockets, slim jims and out of date meat did not constitute a balanced diet.  Daniel insisted on breakfast, lunch and dinner, most of which he cooked himself.

In fact, Daniel had been doing a lot of stuff himself since his divorce; running the dealership, training more and more students at Miyagi-Do, decorating their new house. (Johnny had offered to do the painting himself, but Daniel had turned him down.  “You’re too sloppy”, he had argued.  “I used to do this professionally!” Johnny had protested. “No wonder you got fired”, Daniel had replied dryly.  There had followed an impromptu sparring session which had soon turned into an impromptu sex session in their newly built bed.)

In fact, Johnny couldn’t remember the last time Daniel had stayed still for more than an hour at a time outside of sleep; every evening after dinner he was up and about, designing a new lesson plan or unpacking yet another container of possessions.  (Johnny couldn’t believe the sheer amount of stuff that Daniel had.  Everything that Johnny owned fitted into two cardboard boxes and a garbage bag.)

You’re wearing yourself out, LaRusso, Johnny thought with a frown as he looked down at his lover.  He reached out and brushed a stray strand of hair out of Daniel’s face, smiling fondly.  But don’t worry.  I got you.

*************************************************

Daniel arrived home one Friday night to find the dining table laden with sushi.  His eyes widened as he surveyed the spread before he turned his gaze on Johnny who was lounging on the couch, a bottle of Coors Banquet dangling from one hand.

“That’s a lot of sushi”, said Daniel.  “Is it from…?”

“Sugarfish”, Johnny finished, taking a swing of beer.  “Yeah.”

“My favourite.” Daniel smiled.  “But I thought you didn’t trust fish?”

“I don’t”, said Johnny. He pointed to a couple of containers on one side of the table.  “I’m having a burger and fries.  The sushi is just for you.”

Daniel’s jaw dropped open. “Johnny, I can’t eat all of this myself!”

Johnny shrugged as he stood up and walked to the table, taking a seat and starting to unpack his burger.

“Then put what you can’t eat in the refrigerator and have it tomorrow.”

Daniel pulled a face as he also took a seat.

“You can’t keep sushi like that.  You’ve got to eat it while it’s fresh.”

“Just eat it all now then”, said Johnny.  “I mean, come on, it’s just fish, how filling can it be?”

“Fish and rice”, Daniel pointed out as he picked up a pair of chopsticks.  “A lot of rice.”

Johnny rolled his eyes as he took a bite of his burger.  “Shut up and eat your fish, LaRusso.”

**********************************************************************************

An hour later, Daniel sat back with a satisfied grunt, one hand resting on his stomach, the table clear of sushi.

“Thanks Johnny”, he said, tongue darting out to lick a speck of soy sauce from his lips.  “I needed that.”

“No worries”, replied Johnny.  “You wanna watch a movie?”

“I can’t”, said Daniel. “I got a lesson plan to work on and I’d like to get a head start on sorting out the spare rooms for when the kids stay over.”

“No”, Johnny said forcefully, slamming a hand down on the table far harder than he had intended to. Daniel looked at him in shock.

“Look, what I mean is, it’s Friday night LaRusso!  You can afford to take some time off to watch a movie with me, OK?”

Daniel sighed.  “Well, I suppose one night can’t hurt.”  He stood up slowly and made his way to the couch. “What movie do you wanna watch? And don’t say Iron Eagle.”

“Fine”, said Johnny.  He got up and walked over to the freezer.  “How about Iron Eagle 2?”

“No”, Daniel said emphatically.  “And not Iron Eagle 3 or Iron Eagle 4 either.”

Johnny huffed as he dished up ice cream into two bowls.  He walked over to the couch and handed Daniel a bowl.

“What’s this?” asked Daniel.

“A flamingo”, Johnny replied, digging into his own ice cream with a spoon.

“I can’t eat any more, Johnny!” Daniel protested.  “Really, I’m too full.”

“But it’s your favourite”, Johnny pointed out.  “Green tea.”

“Really?” asked Daniel. He watched as Johnny raised the spoon to his lips.  “And you’re having some too, are you?”

Johnny shrugged. “Yeah, why not?  It’s still ice cream, right, even if it’s a weird flavour. How bad can it be?”

Daniel continued to watch as Johnny put the ice cream in his mouth.  His face contorted in revulsion a few seconds later.  “Jesus, that’s disgusting!”

Daniel chuckled.  “It’s an acquired taste, Johnny.”

“It’s a nasty ass taste is what it is”, Johnny grumbled, reaching for the TV remote.

Daniel ended up eating both bowls.

**********************************************************************************

The movie they settled on was Top Gun.  Daniel started fidgeting ten minutes in, one knee jiggling up and down.  He reached out for his phone but Johnny grabbed his hand instead and pulled him down so Daniel was lying in his lap.

“Just chill out”, Johnny murmured, stroking Daniel’s hair in a way he knew the other man liked. Daniel’s eyebrows furrowed together but he didn’t say anything.

As the film progressed, Johnny felt Daniel start to relax as he got more comfortable.  By the end of the movie Daniel was completely at ease, laughing as Johnny provided a running commentary to the action.  (“’You can be my wingman anytime’.  Seriously, look at the way they’re eye banging each other. You know it’s Iceman he’s going to fuck that night, not Charlie.”)

As the credits rolled Daniel shifted, turning his head to gaze up at Johnny.  “This has been nice”, he said softly.

“Yeah, it has.” Johnny smiled down at him.  “You ready for sleep?”

Daniel grinned wickedly. “No.  But I’m ready for you to take me to bed.”

**********************************************************************************

After that every Friday evening became a stay at home date night.  They would eat takeout (with Johnny making sure Daniel always ate more than him, plus desert) before watching a cheesy 80’s movie (Johnny refused to watch a film from any other decade).

Johnny also started to help with the cooking on other days, repeatedly making just a bit too much food, the extra helpings always ending up on Daniel’s plate.  As the weeks progressed Daniel started to seem calmer, less tightly wound.  He laughed more as he gained back the weight he had lost (and then some), his cheeks dimpling when he smiled.

Due to Daniel’s active lifestyle most of the additional weight went on as muscle, his shoulders broadening slightly and his biceps thickening in a way that made Johnny’s stomach do somersaults every time he touched Daniel’s upper arms.  Daniel’s behind looked amazing too; one night when they went for a drink after work Daniel leaned over the bar while he ordered and Johnny swore blind that every head in the crowded room swivelled round to get an eyeful of his ass.

But most of all there was a solidity to Daniel that hadn’t been there before; he took up more space, the indentations he left in the couch and the bed a little deeper.  He seemed more present, more able to live in the moment, less concerned with planning and regulating every aspect of his life.  

**********************************************************************************

It was a Thursday, and Johnny had convinced Daniel to finish work early.  They sat on the couch, kissing languidly.  Johnny snaked a hand round Daniel’s waist, noting with satisfaction how much thicker it was these days.  As their embrace became more passionate Johnny picked Daniel up, a decidedly more difficult task than it once was, and carried him into the bedroom.

As they lay in bed afterwards, breathing heavily, Daniel reached out a hand and entwined his fingers with Johnny’s.

“Thank you”, he said softly. “For looking after me.”

Johnny smiled in the darkness.

“Yeah, well, I don’t like to see you suffer LaRusso.  Not anymore. You were stretching yourself thin.”

“Like butter scraped over too much bread”, Daniel murmured.

“What?”

Daniel shifted, turning over onto his side.  “Nothing. Just a story my Dad used to read to me.”

Johnny rolled over too, acting the big spoon, pulling Daniel close into him so their bodies were pressed flush against each other.  As they drifted off to sleep Johnny ran a hand down Daniel’s side, and was pleased to find that he could barely feel any ribs at all.

[beerecordings]

Umm is it possible to ask for different ipliers/septic egos accidently walking in on a Jim Jim religion meeting?

hahaha okay okay a goofy piece for a funny prompt. credit to the anon who suggested that the Jim twins would think JJ stood for Jim Jim, an idea which then progressed into us all joking about the twins starting a JJ-based religion (posts about it are tagged Jim Jim Jameson lol). so here’s a slightly crack fic but still a funny and sometimes cute look at the way the Jims interact with the others. a quick piece, slightly ridiculous hahaha <3

-------------

“Burgers? Who wants burgers and who wants hot dogs? Cheese? Who wants cheese? You know what, Derekson, just get me a list of everybody and what they want.”

“Wilford, sir, that’s not a spatula.”

“No? Then what is it, my dear boy?”

“Looks like somebody’s Wall-E DVD, Wil.”

Chase chokes on his soda and tries not to laugh aloud, though all he ends up doing is spitting Dr. Pepper out of his nose.

“Chase!” gripes Marvin, shoving his lawn chair away. “Gross!”

“He’s out of his fucking mind,” wheezes Chase, trying to keep it down.

“They all are,” hisses back Marvin, but he’s laughing too. Chase can see it in the shine in his eyes.

“Hey, shut up, man,” laughs Bing.

“You shut up,” shoots back Marvin.

“No, you.”

“You are two to one here, Bing-a-ling,” teases Chase, grinning.

“Aw, come off it,” chuckles the robot, sitting back. “Pass me a beer, will you?”

“You can’t drink liquids, Bing.”

“I like the aesthetic!”

“Wilford!” Edward is boxing Wilford away from the grill, trying to keep him from using Eric’s glasses as his second impromptu spatula. “I am grilling, you are absolutely one hundred percent banned from anything involving fire.”

“Now, see here, Bim,” growls Wilford.

“I’m Edward, Wilford. Google, tell Wilford he’s not allowed on the grill!”

On the other side of the space between the three houses, a head with shining black hair turns only slightly, and a smooth voice sounds.

“Wilford,” calls Google. “I have yet to see the darkness. Do you think he is in pain, stuck in his room?”

Wilford’s eyes flicker, distracted, even a little unnerved. He puffs himself up after a moment, dropping Eric’s glasses into the grass as if they were never in his hand to begin with. “What, my blackbird, stuck in his bedroom? I shall carry him if I have to. And we will sit on the grass and drink this cocaine soda everyone is always raving about!”

“For the last time,” groans Edward. “There’s no cocaine in Coca-Cola anymore!”

But Wilford is already hurrying off towards the house behind the peach trees, whistling to himself as he goes.

“Thank you, Google,” calls Ippy, sighing deeply, and across the yard the android raises a hand in silent acquiescence, his attention still on Jameson’s rapid signing. Something about American tea, as far as Chase can tell. He laughs and sits back against Bing’s legs, sprawling his own boots out in front of him and finishing his soda with a quiet sigh. There’s beer for his brothers but, like the residents of these three houses, he won’t have any. He’s supposed to be happy while they’re visiting this mess of a – would you call it a family? – and he won’t let old habits get in the way. He casts his eyes quietly around the yard, almost sleepy with the comforting laziness of the little vacation. Jackie is the center of Shep and Host’s attention, telling an enthusiastic story about a burning building that turned out to be a drug front he busted back in Brighton, Henrik is exchanging a birdie back and forth with Bim as they wait for Ippy and Eric to come back for doubles, and Marvin is right here, kicking Chase’s foot for fun while Google discusses Earl Grey in a monotone behind them.

“This is weird,” says Chase.

“Yeah,” says Bing.

“But not so much in a bad way,” adds Marvin, and they exchange grins over sodas and beers, warm in the sun and the scratchy California grass.

“Okay, I got everybody’s order, right?” calls Ippy, flipping a burger. “Host, you – oh, no, here you are. The twins, where are the twins? Hey, who knows what the twins want? Where are they?”

“I saw them going down into that little, uh, door?” says Chase, pointing at a pair of wooden doors sticking out of the earth by the third house.

“Oh, yeah, an old shelter,” sighs Ippy. “They hang out down there sometimes. I should get them, maybe, uh – ”

“Aw, no sweat, doc,” says Chase, clambering to his feet. “I’ll see what they want. You focus on getting the meat just right.”

“Thanks, Brody.”

Chase tweaks Marvin’s ear teasingly as he passes and steps towards the doors across the way, setting his feet and pulling them gently open. He steps down into the concrete basement and finds that it’s actually been decorated quite nicely for an underground bomb shelter – thick rugs are layered across the floor, leaving a little patch of space in the corner for a heater, and a pair of electric camping lanterns surround the twins where they’re sitting in the middle of the shelter, working on –

“Um,” says Chase. “Is that Jamie?”

Both twins let out shrieks of surprise and the first leans hurriedly down to blow out the candle of his lantern. It is, however, still electric. He groans in despair and flops down onto the rug, hiding the papers and pictures that litter the floor in his arms.

“Intruder!” wails the second, covering his eyes with his hands. “Jim’s fortress is breached!”

Chase is too distracted to reply by the pictures of his brother, which he now sees are not just littering the floor, but also covering the walls. Some of them are hand-drawn, hurried stick figures with mustaches and black hats, while others have been printed off from the internet, showing Jamie’s smiling face in sepia brown or grey and white.

“Uhhhhhh,” says Chase. “I, uh. What is this?”

“Nothing,” promise both twins, grabbing each other for support.

“Chase! Chase!” Feet patter down the stairs, bringing wild laughter with them, and Jackie and Shep appear with Jackie’s hands wrapped around the biggest toad Chase has ever seen, struggling in his hands. “Look at this fucking toad!”

“He just snatched it right off the ground,” howls Shep, who has always found anything Jackie did to be hilariously funny.

“I thought you’d appreciate more than Henrik, who slapped me for trying to make him pet it,” giggles Jackie, shoving it into Chase’s face. “He’s perfect and he – what the hell is all this?”

Shep and Jackie go just as quiet as Chase did, staring around the walls.

“Did you marker a mustache onto your puppy?” asks Shep, pointing at the stuffed animal in one of the Jims’ arms.

“Why does your computer have a livefeed of Jamie eating a hot dog?” asks Jackie a little more dangerously.

“Okay, fine, you have caught Jim!” cries the first one. “Jim is celebrating the great Jim Jim with knick-knacks and cute pictures.”

“His name – ” Shep pauses to sigh and smack his own forehead. “Boys. We have talked about some of these obsessions. The last thing you ‘celebrated’ was that three toed-sloth you saw on Planet Earth.”

“She was perfect!” howl both twins in sync. “Perfect, she was perfect! She just wanted a mate, Silver Jim, she just wanted a husband! She could swim, Silver Jim! She was a sloth with three toes!”

“Are they going to like, uh. Hurt and/or kidnap Jameson?” asks Jackie, touching Shep’s arm.

“What, the twins? No. They’re harmless. Wouldn’t hurt a fly. Well, not on purpose. They once tied a string around one and then it died because they didn’t know how to feed it and they cried until Eric brought them popsicles, but that’s just the twins.”

Jackie steps politely over the babbling twins and carefully turns off the livefeed of Jamie.

“Jim likes JimJim!”

“Why is he leaving tomorrow?”

“Freedom of worship, Silver Jim! America!”

“Okay, okay,” cries Silver, waving his hands to quiet them. “Sh, boys, it’s okay, hey. Don’t fuss. Look, Jackie found a toad!”

The twins sniffle and turn their attention to the toad, instantly excited again.

“Oh! Like in Frog and Toad!”

“Like in Rango!”

“Like in the Princess and the Frog! But a toad! Can Jim have it, Mr. not-quite Jim Jim, please?”

Jackie shrugs and hands them the toad. “What are you going to call it?”

“Jameson!” cry both twins at once, happily petting the toad’s head as it croaks.

Jackie, Chase, and Shep exchange glances.

“Well, we’re heading out tomorrow,” says Chase.

“And I’m driving back to my apartment in the city,” adds Shep.

“Pretend we never saw this?” Jackie suggests.

“Yep,” answer Shep and Chase together, and the three of them turn and head right back up the stairs, passing a confused Ippy with two plates of hot dogs, who gives them one odd look and then continues down.

“Boys!” he hollers a moment later, and Chase, Jackie, and Silver all burst into laughter and hurry away, sitting down around Jameson, who wants to know what exactly is so funny?

“Nothing,” they all promise, ignoring Google’s eyeroll and Jamie’s indulgent smile. “Just another obsession of the Jims, haha.”

“Well, they go through three of those a week,” sighs Google. “Don’t get too excited. Whatever it is, they’ll be over it in a couple days.”

Perhaps that is usually true.

But not this time.

------------------

“Okay,” says Ippy, surveying the room besides the kitchen, blinking slowly. “This has officially gone too far.”

Host laughs rich and low, covering his mouth and leaning against the doorway, apparently endlessly amused by this newest interest of the cameramen’s. Eric giggles weakly, glancing around, but there’s a light of alarm in his eyes too, and it only makes Host laugh harder when he senses it, halfway collapsing against the doorway.

“Why is typewriter Jim laughing?” complains the second Jim, pasting another picture in a scrapbook labeled ‘the greatness of JimJim.’

“Is this a fucking cult?” asks Host. “I’ve seen worse but this one is certainly the cutest.”

“Jim is not cute!” protests the second Jim, while the first asks, “Oh, Jim, would you like to join Jim?”

“No, honey,” laughs Host, striding away. “I leave more patient men than I to deal with this.”

“Host,” grumbles Ippy, before sighing and turning his attention back to the Jims. “Boys, this isn’t a cult, right?”

“What’s a cult?” asks the second.

“Jim thinks the word doctor Jim is looking for is religion,” pipes up the first helpfully.

Edward turns around so he can swear without them hearing. Eric laughs again, relaxing the more he looks around and stepping over to sit down with the twins.

“Come on, Ippy. They’re just having fun.”

“Worshipping Jameson is not an appropriate way to have fun,” protests Edward.

“They’re scrap-booking.” Eric holds up the little book, which is, admittedly, rather well-made for a Jim project.

“And making a documentary!” exclaims Jim, holding his computer out to Eric, where iMovie is open to several very shaky shots of Jameson sitting on the couch or talking with the others or, on one screen, cooking omelets and turning occasionally to smile at the eagerly narrating twins.

“And making a documentary,” repeats Eric fondly, ruffling his hair. “It’s just arts and crafts.”

“There’s a poster of Jameson made out of sticky notes on the wall!”

“And look how good they did at putting the notes together!”

“Thank you, sweater Jim,” say both the twins politely, smiling.

“Eric, it’s creepy. They don’t need to learn to be obsessing over other people.”

“You let them stalk Mark for two months.”

“Oh, yeah, cause that was hilarious,” laughs Ippy, throwing his head back. “He was so confused. Fuck Mark!”

“Fuck Mark,” repeat the twins eagerly.

“No! Don’t swear, guys, I know you’ll start doing it at work if I let you do it at home,” sighs Ippy.

“Jim would never swear in front of the petting zoo animals!” cries the first Jim.

“And Jim would never swear while helping with the news!” adds the second, indignant.

“See how responsible they are! Ip, let them be. I’ll make sure it doesn’t get too creepy. Like, uh. The hairs in this scrapbook aren’t actually Jameson’s, are they?”

“Yes, from Jim Jim’s mustache,” answer both twins, beaming.

“Well, why don’t you let me have that,” suggests Eric, carefully unstapling the plastic bag with a few stray dark hairs at the bottom.

“You two will be the death of me,” says Ippy, shaking his head.

But they do look damn sweet when they’re smiling that big.

“Okay, but no filming Jameson when he’s not looking anymore.”

“Okay, doctor Jim,” promise the twins.

“Jim will do it when Jim Jim and doctor Jim are both not looking,” whispers the second.

“They’ll never suspect it,” agrees the first in a hush. Eric laughs, tidying their scrapbook materials a little.

“You could even learn BSL like Jamie, maybe,” he suggests.

The twins light up like fireworks.

“BSL!” repeats the first one, clapping his hands together.

“JIM CAN SPEAK AS THE GREAT JIM SPEAKS,” screams the second at the top of his lungs, and this is enough to startle Bing, who was about to ride his skateboard down the stairs. He yelps in alarm as his board slips beneath him, and a moment later he comes crashing hard down the stairs and lands in a heap of sparking parts at Ippy’s feet.

“The death of me!” repeats the doctor furiously, waving his finger around accusingly. “All of you! This whole house! This whole clearing! I’ll die at thirty-four! You’ll have to bury me! Have fun with my funeral expenses, you complete bastards.”

“Bastards!” repeat the twins.

“Look bastards up in BSL!”

“Look Jim up in BSL!”

“Look everything up in BSL!”

Ippy has the distinct feeling he’s being made fun of, just a little, but even Bing is laughing, and all he can do is try not to smile as he heads back out the door.

-----------------

“Can’t you move a body a little more quietly?”

Wilford hauls the heavy tarp across the pathway and grunts, flicking a little blood off his fingers. “Well, you could help!”

“Why would I do that when I have you to do it for me?” purrs back Dark, following him down the pathway towards the car.

“You just like to feel like you’re manipulating something,” scolds Wilford, pausing just to boop Dark’s nose. In protest, Dark vanishes back into the void and leaves Wilford with nothing but a sulking shadow drifting around his feet.

“And now you’re a smoke kitty,” coos Wilford, dragging the body farther down the path.

“Just hurry,” says Dark, re-appearing in a masculine form this time. “You know I prefer for the twins to stay sheltered and I don’t want them catching us again.”

“Catching what?” asks Jim, standing in the trees with his camera.

Wilford swears colorfully and Dark dissipates back into shadow on instinct, spitting out curses of his own.

“Now, see here, Iplier,” says Wilford. “It’s quite rude to be sneaking up on a fellow.”

“That’s Jim, Wil.”

“Oh. What in the name of Burt Reynolds are you two doing out here so late at night?”

“Oh! We’re filming for a documentary for Jim Jim.”

“They mean Jameson,” Dark tells Wil.

“Who’s Jameson?” whispers Wilford.

Dark sighs very deeply.

“He is the great Jim!” cries the second Jim, rising from the bushes like a Peanuts character on Halloween.

“The great Jim,” repeats the first Jim solemnly.

“He’s that little old-fashioned…” Dark waves his hand, trying to find the right word. “Jackson. You’ve met him.”

“Oh, I know who you mean. The British chap with the truly excellent mustache. But he’s not even out here, what are you filming?”

“Well, he is not here. But Jim has heard is very fond of hedgehogs. So Jim is trying to find some!”

“Are there hedgehogs in America?” whispers Wilford.

“Fuck if I know,” answers Dark irritably.

“Would you like to join Jim in the search for hedgehogs and ultimately the eternal worship of the great Jim Jim?”

“Don’t look so hopeful, you little miscreant, you know I avoid engaging with you at all costs,” growls Dark, but the twins just giggle.

“They used to be afraid of you,” teases Wilford.

“Shut up,” snipes Dark. “I could make them afraid in about two seconds.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“But you won’t.”

“The real question,” interrupts one of them – Dark can’t tell them apart. “Is what are Dark and pink Jim doing out in the forest late at night? Jim is a very good reporter, you know. Jim uncovers mysteriousnesses.”

“I think you mean mysteries,” says Dark. “And we’re, uh.”

Wil and Dark glance at the body in between them.

“Returning a lamp to the store,” finishes Wil.

Dark closes his eyes. His exasperation has set in so deep he can feel it in his broken spine. He’s going to kill Wilford. But then again, he thinks that about three times a day and never seems to make good on his threat.

“A lamp,” says Jim.

“A lamp,” repeats his brother.

They stare down at the wrapped corpse.

“That checks out,” says the first.

“Jim is an investigative journalist so Jim can tell,” agrees the second.

“Just get out of my sight,” snaps Dark, advancing on them with shadow cloaking his set shoulders, and the twins shriek in equal parts fear and excitement and go darting back into the underbrush.

“You’re it, Mr. Dark!”

“Run, Jim! Run!”

Dark crosses his arms over his chest and turns to glare at Wilford.

“I could scare them if I wanted to.”

Wilford just smiles and picks up the body again, pausing only to give Dark a quick kiss on the cheek.

“I know you could, little ghost. Hey, should we be worried they appear to be worshipping Jacksepticeye?”

“Should I be concerned you told me you worshipped the Pillsbury dough boy while you were drunk last week?”

“Oh, no, the body is slipping! Let me just – ” He picks it up and slings it over his shoulder, sprinting towards the car and away from any further questions. Dark rolls his eyes and drifts back into the shadows, following peaceably after him.

---------------------

Google blinks awake to a pair of eyes staring back at him.

Check that. Two pairs of eyes.

“Boys,” he says levelly. “I’m charging. This had better be an emergency.”

Jim and Jim exchange looks.

Carefully, they push a crumpled pamphlet with Jameson’s face drawn on it in crayon beneath his nose.

“Join our religion?”

Google gets out of bed in one swooping motion, drags them both out of the house, and, ignoring the shrill cries of “why, cruel computer Jim?” and “persecution! Persecution! Persecution!” dumps them both bodily into the lake.

---------------------

Everybody gets to hear about it at one point or another. The Jims’ amicability for JJ, taken a little too far, is occasionally annoying, but nevertheless remains largely harmless. In the name of the great JJ, they pick up more than one of his hobbies – taking care of injured animals, painting with watercolors, dressing in black and white – and develop rudimentary BSL that actually turns out to be really helpful on the days when the twins are distressed and won’t talk out loud. Most of them learn to tolerate it with amusement, though Host never stops thinking it’s one of the funniest things they’ve ever done and Google makes sure they learn the consequences of being too irritating. Bing and Eric bring them craft supplies and trinkets from the store that remind them of JJ, while Ippy entices them to eat their vegetables and sit still through examinations with made-up stories about how tough and healthy Jameson is. On Christmas Eve, as a reward for being good all year, Ippy asks Jameson to Skype with them for a little while, and he’d never seen the twins so excited and yet so well-mannered at the same time, even managing to use first-person pronouns for themselves once or twice, eager to impress JJ.

“Good signing,” he congratulates them, looking soft and snuggly in the Christmas Eve pajamas he and his brothers all exchanged for the night.

“Thank you thank you thank you!” sign the twins eagerly, and Ippy chuckles, blowing on their hot chocolate to cool it before he brings it to them.

“You must have been dedicated,” says Jameson, and when they don’t understand, he substitutes the word “good.”

“Good!” chirps Jim, clapping his hands together. “Good! We have! We have!”

“You will tell Santa to bring us gifts, then?” asks his brother eagerly. Ippy smiles and takes a sip of the chocolate, checking the temperature carefully.

JJ laughs. “How will I tell him? Did you write letters?”

“Yes, we did. But I bet he will believe it if Jim Jim puts in a good word for us!”

“That’s sweet,” chuckles JJ, keeping his hands slow. “But I think he will listen to you too! I’m just little old me.”

“Yeah,” says Jim cheerfully. “God.”

Ippy spits the hot chocolate out and races over to slam shut the computer before he can see Jameson’s reaction.

“Boys!” he hollers. “Too far!”

Iplier hears a thud as, up the stairs and narrating this story to himself, Host laughs so hard he tumbles right out of his bed.

[youarejesting]

Limited Edition.3 Burger

[FULL MASTERLIST] [Limited Edition Master list]

Beta: N/A Rating: All audiences Genre: Fantasy, Comedy, Fluffy Fluff, Adventure. Pairing: Bts x Friend!Reader Words: 1.3K

Summary: It is your first time buying proper merchandise, there are new chibi figurines and the first person to order will recieve a limited edition set. But what happens when BTS have gone missing without a trace and a few days later you receive your package. The box says congratulations, you open to find your limited edition figures, they look so lifelike. OH WAIT! it’s cause they are.

"Anything else?" You asked them, holding in a bright smile and suppressing several squeals. They were just so adorable they could fit on your palm. You had to remain somewhat serious while these tiny men, they were still adults.

So you made sure to discuss their order with the utmost professionalism. Each agreeing to eat one burger between themselves and share a small sprite on Hoseok’s insistence.

Taking the phone you added something for yourself and hurriedly placed the order. You knew you could eat their leftovers and save yourself money, but you weren’t that close yet and thought it too intimate. “It will be here in fifteen minutes, in the meantime. I have to make a grocery list.”

You pulled out a pen and paper and started writing down your usual things like milk, bread, meat, cereal but you froze. Would they get sick with the sudden change of diet, what was their usual meals in Korea. 

“What do you boys want to eat?” They thought for a brief moment before shouting out some suggestions.

“Kimchi fried rice”

“Samgyeopsal”

“Seolleongtang”

Freezing in place, you didn’t know how to make any of these things. As you wrote them down, Seokjin must have noticed your confusion and touched Jungkook’s shoulder. He gave the younger boys a look trying to calm their enthusiasm.

“We would be happy with whatever you make, we can’t expect you to know how to cook all these things” The eldest assured you, the boys all deflated looking embarrassed.

“I like spaghetti” Jungkook looked up hopeful and you wrote it down with a smile. That you definitely knew how to make.

“Steak” Namjoon grinned then held out his small hands in defense “Only If it is not too expensive”

While you waited for your food to arrive, you began thinking about where they would sleep and what they needed to live. They would have to go to the toilet and shower and so much more. You didn't know how this would work. Wanting to give them independence and privacy whilst also wanting to protect them from harm. Heaven forbid any of them, got hurt, or drowned in the toilet.

The food arrived, breaking you out of your thoughts. Everyone all gathered around, You unwrapped their burger and sat watching them while enjoying your own meal. Taehyung excitedly ripped open a ketchup sachet and proceeded to splatter sauce everywhere.

They all froze mouths hanging open in shock, the ketchup splashed across the bench. Pressing your lips shut tight you tried to hold yourself together. They turned to you as a collective trying to gauge your reaction, but you turned away unable to hide the shaking of your shoulders.

“Are you upset?” Taehyung’s voice a feeble sound, as he placed his hand on your elbow. You could feel the tears rolling down your cheeks.

“We will clean it up” Jimin called and they tried to grab a napkin from the bag, Seokjin and Jungkook grabbed the napkin at the same time and Jungkook ended up pulling too hard and Seokjin ended up tackling Jungkook.

You couldn’t hold it in. Laughing hysterically the tears flowing, you walked away with your hands on your sides. “I don’t think she was mad” Hoseok giggled taking a bite of the burger and pointing. “She has a cute laugh though.”

After lunch shenanigans, you were lost in thought once more. How could you bring up such an issue, like toileting and showering they were not only celebrities but they were boys.

"What do I do about your toilet and shower habits, I don't mean to be weird.” You blushed, “it's just, I don't want you getting hurt falling into the toilet or basin or anything"

They blushed "Oh, we will figure it out. Please do not worry."

"I might be able to make something" you hummed and began brainstorming. “Can you hold on for a little while while I make you some toileting facilities?”

“Actually I have to pee?” Hoseok blushed, you wondered how you would go about this, when they all nervously admitted they needed to go as well.

“We can just go outside we are boys” Namjoon assured you, scooping them up, you carried them outside. Turning around to giving them privacy in the grass. You were humiliated for them but what else could you do?

“I am so sorry, I will make something work”

“Please do not stress we are boys and human just like anyone else”

“Except now really tiny” They looked at each other and you bit your lip snorting, “Sorry I have been holding it in but, you are all so cute, anyone this small would be”

They seemed to relax watching you slowly grow comfortable enough to talk more freely. Giving them your iPad you sat them on your bed with a plate of the few leftover snacks from your pantry. They were quick to open Netflix and argue over movies. 

“Watch this one.” You selected one at random “Not only does me choosing the show stop you arguing, but I also want to watch it, so you have to report to me if it is any good. I will be back as quick as I can be, please don't get hurt”

Racing to the mall you went into a multitude of shops. The first was the most important a toy shop, where you bought a dollhouse one that had working lights. At the craft warehouse, you bought a bunch of fabric, foam, and elastic. From the town’s hardware store you purchased a large length of thin black hose, silicone, thin metal, and some thin balsa wood. After that you quickly walked the grocery store, before you driving home exhausted but excited.

You had never been so creative in your life but there were so many videos and tutorials only, especially for mini cooking so when you got home, you immediately got to work. You began by modifying the dollhouse bathroom adding tiny black hoses as piping. You added little pipes to a few water bottles you had outside of the house the bottles would act as little water tanks.

Once the bathroom was done you began on making their beds taking the simple bed frames and painted them. You got up stretching your back, neck, and shoulders before heading out to make a small amount of dinner which was some cheap ramen. Making sure to test the dollhouse lights, it was a success but the rooms were so old fashioned. 

The cupboards attached to the walls had working drawers and each had a few clothes hangers inside. You removed all the dolls and moveable furniture and began making mattresses out of foam and covering them in some fabric. You were so thankful for the sewing machine you had inherited from your grandmother and the few pillowcases you had made in home economics back in school.

In no time you had made enough beds for the seven and with the leftover foam two long couches. You used the extra fabric to make curtains and yawned checking the time. It was midnight and the boys were asleep on your bed. You pressed on, you needed this to be complete for them, they were real adult people despite their size and wouldn’t enjoy being treated like babies.

You took the time following a tutorial and eventually made a working stove that worked with a tea light candle you had fished out from your emergency kit. Looking over the house you knew you couldn’t get everything done before morning so you decided to make everything look pretty. 

You took different paints and painted the rooms soft colors, made the beds, and with a few popsicle sticks and string you made them tiny pictures for above their beds. Happy, that they came with clothes so they would have enough to wear without you making more things. You weren’t ready to make clothes that small.

Setting the dollhouse securely on your large computer desk, it was three am and you were covered in wood chips, paint, and glue. Deciding it was best if you had a shower before bed. Taking a hot shower to work the aches and pains from your neck, you could have almost fallen asleep under the all-encompassing stream of hot water.

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[ashtonq247]

Kaminari Denki headcannons!!

Bc it’s his bday and I love him (this will not cover his fam bc I switch between backstories with him so much that I just have no clue)

Buckle up bc this is a very long post I did not mean to get this deep lol

Let’s start with the most obvious- he makes friends easily, but I’m not just talking other students, I’m also talking the staff. This boy makes friends with the janitors and the lunch ladies and even the teachers!! He also makes friends with the security bots and pranks them a lot

This stems from him wanting ppl to like him. I think this bc of the fact that his character sheet says he likes all things “trendy” - I think he rlly wants to be known as the cool guy bc he is rlly insecure of himself

And as much as I think he is very trendy, I also think he is a big literature nerd! I believe he is more likely to listen to audio books tho, but I’m not entirely 100% sure though. He tries to keep this underwrap, but eventually he does join momo’s book club and brings completely different analysis to the table :D

He is just generally into the arts (we see this in cannon- he plays guitar, is seen drawing Aizawa, references Hemingway) so I see him as a more creative guy rather than a logically minded dude

This boy has adhd, anxiety, and dyslexia and dyscalcula (he was able to work through dyslexia bc he read so much, but still has problems with his dyscalcula) and this causes issues for him in school. He also a HUGE procrastinator. He often feels stupid and dumb bc if it (also doesn’t help that even his friends joke abt it too, but as long as it’s just a joke he shouldn’t make a big deal abt it right??)

I say he has anxiety because of the way he reacts to when he is training- always panicking and frying his brain. I think what stans between him and being rlly op is his anxiety and view of himself

Speaking of him frying his brain, I headcannon he has litchenburg figures, which if u don’t know r these rlly cool scars that look kinda like branches with what kinda looks like flowers so cool tbh, and BEFORE u say “he obviously doesn’t have them cannonly” let me just say that his quirk affects his brain cannonly!! It’s not weird for it to also affect his skin!!! I think he might have had litchenburg figures if they were more commonly known as it is a very cool thing tbh

I also think that bc his brain gets impacted by his quirk, sometimes his nerves get impacted too. This means he sometimes can’t taste food (and he doesn’t eat it when he can’t taste it, which pisses Bakugo off) and he also can’t feel things as well (I believe the class figures this out after Denki went to poor himself some tea but didn’t know the kettle was still rlly hot and so he grabbed it not knowing he was burning himself until he handed it over to someone who then dropped the pot bc it was so hot- needles to say he had to go to recovery girl that day)

He has never been to the aquarium bc as a child he had terrible control over his quirk and that made ppl nervous to put him near water (he goes as a teen with the bakusquad and is absolutely floored- his favorite creatures are of course all the sting rays, jelly fish, and electric eel- cue bakusquad comparing him to the brainless jellyfish)

He also doesn’t know how to swim till he was in middle school (once he was in better control of his quirk he went out and learned to swim on his own bc he had to learn how if he wanted to be a hero u know? He never quit got the hang of it tho)

Storms make him very energized and his already low ability to focus worsens. Prone to accidentally zapping ppl. He mostly stays in his room when storms happen bc he doesn’t want to hurt ppl/ wreck electronics on accident. He doesn’t even get to chat with friends on the phone bc he would wreck it so storms get rlly lonely :(

Also is basically a lightning rod. It hurts bc of how forceful it is, but it’s also not that big of a deal to him

Is prtty forgetful unfortunately due to all the times he fried his brain. It’s something he really tries not to think about

He probs can’t sleep very easily due to all his energy

He hates frying his brain bc it’s very hard to understand what’s going on when he does. Everything is a lot more sluggish and things are simultaneously way too much and he gets hyper sensitive and at the same time his senses are also very groggy and weird. It’s over all a bad time, but he got used to it

Whenever he fried his brain instead of being all wheyyy and thumbs upy he use to act more vegetative which rlly freaked ppl out so he eventually learned to get to where he is now when he fries his brain

Kids use to take advantage of his whey mode and do pranks on him which often got him hurt, but he never rlly felt it at first so he didn’t mind to bad. As long it was just joking and they were having fun right??

Time for happy ones!! His favorite foods (besides burgers, those r his favorite cannonly) all have some coralation with memes (speggeti tacos, mac n cheese, “chonky” milk, chicken nuggy, etc)

He is a meme lord yes

Stans pikachu (obvi)

U cannot convince me that he doesn’t paint his nails black, maybe with a little lightning bolt on his middle finger. This boy cannonly wears a choker common

He does face masks with Mina!! I believe he cares abt his looks greatly, and does beauty routines with Mina all the time. I’m constantly switching btween wether or not he owns it, or is a bit insecure and tries not to show this side to much to the boys

Why does this show not give him skinny jeans?? I mean common his entire style calls for skinny jeans. Maybe it’s Japan fashion or smth bc if it was in America he’d have skinny jeans bc it’s the trendy thing u know

Cannot cook. Can barely work the microwave. Claims unmarked food and eats it at midnight

Has a lot of weird info stored in his brain- how weather works, psychology stuff, weird facts abt bees, etc- that he learns randomly, never rlly trying to learn them but it sort of just happens u know. This frustrates Bakugo and jirou to no end bc he knows all these useless facts about how 1,200,000 mosquitos is all it takes for them to all at once drain a human of all their blood in a second, but not about how to work the pathagorean theorem

Idk why I think this (and it’s a popular headcannon too), but he knows at least 3/4 languages. It just suits him?? Bc he is a ppl person??? I don’t know??

Gets major test anxiety

Teachers either love him or hate him no in between. A lot of his elementary teachers absolutely hated him and would tear him down by calling him stupid and annoying. In middle school when he learns to control his quirk better, teachers rlly liked him- in the way that class clown trouble makers are liked by teachers. He may not excel in his class but he is a pretty funny dude.

He is constantly either underestimated or overestimated. Kaminari himself does this as well. It’s part of the issue with his hero training

Cats do not like him. They may like being petted bc if the static electricity, but when Kami pets cats he just absorbs the static- no pleasure :(((- or he accidentally has too much static electricity. If so then only tge rlly fluffy cats like him. Either case, shinsou finds a cat that likes kaminari as well and it is very cute :33

THE class prankster. Even on the teachers! The death glare Aizawa gave him on the one time prancing him worked is one kaminari will never forget (he still tries to prank him despite this lol)

Constantly teasing Bakugo as a way to press his buttons. It’s debatable on wether or not this helps bakugo’s anger issues

He is the wingman between Bakugo and Kirishima change my mind!!

Also mandatory kaminari is bisexual headcannon bc he rlly gives me those vibes. I think he doesn’t know yet that he’s bisexual, and when he thinks a fellow bro is hot he thinks he’s just admiring his bro u know. Maybe even thinks he is jealous. He does flirt with all genders tho mostly as a joke. He draws dicks as jokes but he always puts a little too much detail in them for him to rlly be straight

Can be used as a defibrillator as long as he can focus

Honestly there’s so much stuff kaminari has the potential to do with his quirk it’s a shame the manga/anime doesn’t use it

Like I rlly want to see him use his quirk in training to blow out all the lights in a building so he can use it for his advantage

That’d be badass

Also his quirk makes him very hard to be caught when their training. He can slip out of ppls grasp easily with a shock, and he also just has good reflexes in genral (I think this is cannon). Cue class 1-a running around trying and failing to catch him lol. Their best bet is to get him to fry his brain :(

He was popular in school before UA bc of his quirk and bc of how charming and easy to get a long with he is. This lead a lot of his friends to be very shallow. He didn’t rlly think about wether or not someone was trying to be his friend or not, he just liked being liked. This lead him to his whole liking trendy things, and he often felt that if he wasn’t seen as cool or funny his friends would all leave him. His whole rlly liking to talk thing caused a lot of ppl to think he was annoying at times, but he was never rlly able to lose that trait

The bakusquad was the first friend group he got rlly close too. He felt he can be himself around them and be the crackhead he was always meant to be. He still always concerned about wether they might leave him if he’s too annoying bc of anxiety but he’s getting better :)

He is a bringer of chaos and that’s part of his charm! Never dull with Denki around. He’s always doing the weirdest stuff, and ever since Mina, Kiri, and Sero, this has only doubled!

He is always calling Momo a genius (bc she is) and they are rlly good friends

Is an unofficial emo squad member (just look at his hero costume)

A sinnamon roll I’m srry but he ain’t a cinnamon roll. He has a dirty mind lol

Peepee jokes

Probably does tik tok dances I’m sorry

Nintendo fan for life

Xbox or PlayStation?- “Nintendo wut u mean”

Abbreviates so much it’s kinda hard to read,. Like if u thought I was bad this boy is soo much worse

It’s kinda ironic bc he has a very large vocabulary lol

He only uses it when he’s being sassy or very passionate

Mixes his gen z lingo with his big brain vicab to create atrocities of sentences

”bro the rise of the proletariat is lit tbh”

He is the worst to text with. He gives Bakugo aneurysms

Yeet yote to be yoted

3am shower thoughts

Unpopular opinion: i don’t think he likes weed. It probs reminds him too much of his whey mode

He’s a good strategist, but let’s the other team members think of the plans bc of insecurity, and otherwise his anxiety causes his smartness to shut down

Very good at zoning out. Sometimes he accidentally zones out so hard during class he misses the entire lesson and is only brought out bc of the school bell. Aizawa is best at snapping him out of it

Tbh I don’t think UA would be good with mental health. You’d think they’d hire a professional therapist or smth, but maybe it’s bc hero’s are so glorified ppl don’t ever think about these issues

I doubt the teachers had very good teacher training u know

We’ve mostly seen young heroes. I bet that’s bc they die so often, and if they don’t die in battle the mental health issues that stem from trauma and the media’s pressure are such an issue that it’s not uncommon for hero work to have high suicide rates

Anyway I’m starting to lose track of things thanks for coming to my ted talk I think I’ll stop here

[harrysgoldrush]

chapter 2: styles v vegan contract

masterlist

tag list

part 1

Y/N Y/LN.

In her final year of law school and already planning on getting her LLM in Environmental Law and Politics. A true force to be reckoned with. Tom had told him that much the moment he closed the office door behind him.

Tom’s office was one of the bigger advisor’s offices on campus, with his desk pushed up against the left wall furthest from the door with two mismatched embroidered chairs that he had stolen from the Tisch School of Arts last year. A giant bookcase covered the whole back wall with books sitting on top of each neatly organized row. The right side of his office was occupied by a worn leather couch that had only fit through the narrow door by some miracle. There was a coffee table with some of the school’s different magazines and newspapers and a small black fridge that always had sodas and Tom’s leftovers.

Harry could imagine her taking naps on that sofa, falling asleep as she plotted her next protest, asking Tom for advice while he answered emails. She wouldn’t even knock, she’d make a beeline to the fridge to grab water. Except she hated those bottles. What did she do instead? Maybe she would finish Tom’s salad for him, his wife always brought him one for lunch and he only ever ate the “exciting” parts before he tucked it away in that fridge.

“Harry, she’s in two of your classes this semester,” Tom had laughed, setting his reading glasses down on his desk as he sat back down. “Your Public and Private Governance Seminar and International Trade and Investment Law and Policy Seminar. Those are small classes, I’m surprised you two haven’t met before.”

Sinking in his chair, he held his back closely as he defended, “We have met before. Last week at Sloan Energy.” 

“Ah,” Tom hummed, clearly entertained at Harry’s reaction. Scooting his chair closer, he closed his laptop so he could look directly at him. “She’s been leading that protest for a while now, I think it will be six weeks this Friday.”

“Is there any way to stop her?”

“From protesting for Green Energy? No.” Taking a deep breath, he rubbed at his neck and added hesitantly, “I suppose you could always talk to her? She’s reasonable enough, she just switched advisors this semester because she wanted to make Mark’s workload lighter; he’s semi-retired now.”

Tom went on to check in with Harry about his internship and how his classes were going so far but Harry could hardly focus, feeling himself drift towards the question of the hour: how could he convince her to move the protest?

From the short interaction he had had with Y/N and Tom’s high praise, he was beginning to think that he was Sloan Energy’s last hope. Why else would they turn to him, an intern, when they had a whole team of more than qualified lawyers? And why had Tom thrown him to the wolves, knowing that another student was leading a whole movement against the company?

Before he could ask, Tom was standing up and shaking his hand. “You’ll have to keep me updated on Sloan Energy and the protests. I’m eager to hear what happens.”

“Yeah, Tom I will. And thanks again for telling me about the internship.”

Tom was quiet for a minute, his smile frozen and his eyes narrowing before he nodded. “Of course, Harry. Jeff Azoff is an old student of mine. When he reached out about looking to hire students, I immediately thought of you. Pays a lot more than that paralegal you’ve been working for since your first year here.”

As Harry was leaving the office, he was surprised to see a new blue bin right next to Tom’s trash can. A single plastic salad bowl sat in it, still dripping water as if it had just been rinsed clean. 

“Is this new?”

“It was a gift, actually. Just got it last week.”

The first thing Harry did after his meeting was text Sarah and Mitch, asking what they knew of Y/N Y/LN. Walking briskly down the hallway, Harry’s searches on Instagram and Facebook proved to be a waste of time. Twitter was useless, with only a few pictures of protests with faces blurred and no mention of her. As he waited for the elevator, Harry opened a new note on his phone and began to type down everything he knew.

Studies Environmental Law

No social media.

Protests when not in class

In my governance and policy seminars

Meeting tonight????

Throughout his Financial Regulation seminar, Harry could hardly focus as their guest speaker outlined the history of finance regulation in the US, wondering how he had never noticed her in his classes. In the sea of sleek and professionally dressed law students, she was like a rainbow colored rocky shore. The only thing standing between him and a guaranteed job after graduation was a strangely dressed classmate.

As soon as they were dismissed, Harry unlocked his phone, relieved to see that Mitch knew her pretty well, having dated her old roommate last year. 

She was always really weird about showers. Her and Katie got into this huge fight at the end of the year because Katie had bought a Keurig and I guess that’s bad for the environment. When Y/N got mad about it, Katie locked herself in the bathroom and ran the shower for an hour. By the time she came out of the shower, Y/N had moved out.

Definitely weird.

Sarah had had class with her before and seemed annoyed at Mitch’s response.

It’s called being environmentally friendly, Rowland. Y/N has been practicing zero-waste since high school. She’s not weird, she’s thoughtful. My first year when I was dehydrated, she took me to the hospital and went to all of my classes for me to take notes. If I wouldn’t be risking arrest and my degree, I’d be protesting with her. She’s a better person than both of you combined. If she wasn’t so busy, she’d be top of our year easily. Why are you asking about her, Harry?

Ignoring her question, Harry put his phone away and kept walking, though he wasn’t entirely sure where to go. He hadn’t been able to convince Tom to give him her schedule although he could probably ask Jeff. And what was that meeting later tonight? Was it with Sloan Energy? Was that why they weren’t expected at the office today?

He wasn’t complaining, in fact he was beyond thankful to have a night to catch up with his studies and term papers, knowing he wouldn’t be getting much sleep either way.

Deciding to get a coffee to keep him warm while he plotted, Harry ducked into the Starbucks across the street and stood in line, making awkward eye contact at an old professor of his who was sitting with a much younger woman. Looking away quickly, his eyes landed on a basket with a sign that said ‘Reusable Cups $3.99’. 

Suddenly, he felt inspired.

Pulling his phone out again, he quickly typed into his search engine ‘is coffee or tea better for earth?’ with a surprising yet logical result. Grabbing two of the reusable coffee cups, Harry smiled widely at the barista.

“Um, just one coffee black. And whatever your healthiest hot tea is.”

Soon, Harry was walking briskly towards Sloan Energy, hoping Y/N wasn’t at her meeting yet. He had only seen her a few hours ago with her bright colors and worn fabrics but as he got closer to the building, it felt like it had been years since he heard her familiar voice, thanking the small gathering around her through her red and white megaphone. The hot drinks in his hand had managed to only spill minimally on the frantic trip across The Village, surviving the packed subway and crowds of tourists.

She was easier to spot now that he knew where to look. The crowd was smaller than it had been the day before, with a few slowly easing out of the group to get somewhere warmer. As Harry made his way to her, he was glad he didn’t have his internship today; he blended in much better with his dark jeans and black zip tie shirt with NYU School of Law embroidered on the chest.

He waited as she informed the group of tomorrow’s meeting times before approaching. It was just them now. Y/N didn’t seem too surprised to see him as she lowered her megaphone and walked towards him, one eyebrow raised as she took in the two white reusable cups in his gloved hands.

“What is this?”

“Green tea,” Holding it out to her, he pulled it back just as quickly and examined the two cups before holding out the other one. “This one’s green tea. Thought you might be cold.”

“No, I meant why are you bringing me a drink?” When he didn’t respond, she asked with a cautious smile, “Did you poison it or something?”

Shaking his head, Harry glanced towards the main doors of Sloan Energy as she took the drink from him, taking a sip before humming. “It's good. Thanks. Harry, right?”

“Yeah. Harry Styles.”

Looping her free hand through the wrist strap of the horn, she wrapped her bare hands around the warm mug as she looked up at him. “Well can I help you, Harry Styles? Or do you just like to watch?”

“Do you want to maybe grab a drink?” He asked, feeling colder with every second he stood under her cautious gaze.

“Besides the one you just gave me?” Smiling, she glanced at the watch on her wrist that looked more like a piece of wood before she cleared her throat and took another sip of her tea. “I have a meeting in an hour so I probably shouldn’t be drinking yet.”

Harry could feel his shoulders droop unintentionally and watched as her eyes widen before she added quickly, “But I’m starving. Have you eaten today?”

She had taken them to a vegan place only a few minutes away, leading them to a table without hesitation, leading Harry to believe she had probably been here a few times before. He was beginning to notice how attentive Y/N was, from the corner of his eye he could see her casually observing him as he read the menu above the counter.

 “Hope you don’t mind vegan, I always come here when I’m in the area.” She suddenly apologized as she dug through her backpack, taking out a much smaller back with her name sewn into it. “Their fries are really good, they’re air fried. The salads are pretty good too.” 

They were quiet, with her eating her guacamole burger as he used the bamboo utensils she had handed him once he sat down with his salad. 

“Don’t worry, they’re clean.” She had explained when he gave her a curious look. They’re safer than actual utensils, they last long. Better for the earth than those plastic things they give out here. Don’t even get me started on the metal stuff.”

The bag she had pulled out of her backpack had turned out to be a pouch with handkerchiefs, bamboo straws and bamboo utensils. The clinking he had heard earlier in her bag turned out to be mason jars.

“So, you just bring those with you everywhere?”

“Pretty much. I’m just doing my part to lower our carbon footprint. I bring my own containers and utensils mostly. Some places around here are getting better. Chloe, the manager, uses plates that are made of recycled materials and then recycles them again when they’re used.”

Nodding, Harry stabbed at his salad thoughtfully. “So why are you protesting Sloan? No offense, but don’t you have better things to do? Like study?”

“Why do you intern there? Aren’t there less morally corrupt businesses you could work for?”

“They’re one of the most successful energy companies on the East Coast--” He began but her sharp laugh was back, cutting him off quickly.

“And one of the most environmentally harmful energy companies in the US. It’s 2019, who uses coal anymore?”

“It’s not that harmful to the environment, it’s a natural resource.” He was glad he had paid attention to his Oil and Gas seminar last week. He only hoped she hadn’t. “Mining and burning the coal doesn’t harm the surrounding earth.”

“Uh, ever heard of global warming? They’re burning fossil fuels that are destroying the atmosphere. It’s not just cows.” She had been paying attention. Finishing off her sandwich, she took her final sip of her tea and looked at him expectantly. 

“What?”

“Just say that they’re paying you a shit ton of money to intern. You don’t need to defend them to me, I’m not going to change my opinion until they change their system.”

Sighing, Harry nodded, not knowing what else to say.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re here then?” 

He set down her bamboo fork, a sign of defeat. He hadn’t prepared as much as he should have.

“I need you to move your protest.”

“Because?”

“If I get you to move your protest from their front doors, they’ll give me an actual job on their legal team once I pass the bar.”

“Oh.” She hadn’t expected that, her voice laced with pity and uncertainty.

“Yeah.”

After an excruciatingly long pause, she nodded. “Okay.”

“What?” Harry was more than surprised as he watched her shrug and wipe at her hands with the dark red cloth she had laid over her lap when she had started eating.

“I’ll do it.”

“But?”

“I have conditions. Obviously. Do you have any paper?”

He shook his head and watched her begin to dig through her backpack. “What? Are you drawing up a contract or something?”

“Yep,” Pulling out a pen and an old flyer for one of the first protests with the words ‘recycled paper’ stamped on it, Harry watched as she began to write messily on the black back side of it. It was bright yellow and her pen ink was a dark blue, her handwriting long and looped which he found fitting. “Today’s the twenty-fifth right?”

When he hummed in agreement, she continued. “Okay. This contract is between Y/N Y/LN and Harry Styles. Y/N Y/LN has agreed to move her protest permanently from outside of Sloan Energy on the understanding that Harry Styles will educate himself on eco-friendly behavior and practices zero-waste to the best of his ability. Styles must also make an effort to change Sloan Energy from inside, beginning with recycling bins within the building. Once he is hired, Styles is expected to push for green energy. How does that sound?”

 “That sounds like I’m doing a lot more than you.”

“Do you want them to hire you or not? I’m doing you multiple favors here, Styles.”

“Can I read it over and get back to you?”

She nodded before quickly scribbling something at the bottom of the contract. After she slid it across the table, he realized it was her number.

“So we can meet outside of my protesting hours should you Don’t think your bosses would be too happy to see you fraternizing with the enemy.” She was smiling now, one full of mischief that made him feel like she was letting him in on a big secret. Harry couldn’t help but smile back, not quite sure what he might be agreeing on.

As she packed up, Harry was tempted to ask her where she was headed, but she beat him to it; it was like she could read his mind. “Don’t follow me this time, okay? Twice in one day should be enough for you, my own apartment is lucky to see me once.”

He didn’t see a point in disagreeing with the girl as she left the small café. Looking around, it was as if all of the charm of the room had vanished with her, the pink walls now looking faded, the table sticky, the chair uncomfortable cold. 

By the time he got home, it had only gotten colder. His roommate, Ed, was an aspiring musician who had decided tonight was the perfect night to hold a private concert in the shower, his only audience being the last of their cold water. Shivering, Harry simply changed into warmer clothes and sat at his desk, putting on an old rock station before he got to work.

Jeff had asked him yesterday to begin looking into Energy Law and he had a paper due in two days that he had yet to start. Choosing to begin on the latter, Harry got to work, cranking out three pages before he remembered the folded up flyer in his coat pocket. Deciding now was as good as ever to stretch his legs, he walked back to the living room to grab it from the coat rack, his eyes tracing over her handwriting that reminded him of  kindergarten teacher. 

Adding her number, he typed out a short text and paused for a moment. If he texted her, that was it. He’d be agreeing to do whatever it is she laid out in this contract of theirs. Still, if he wanted the job, he knew he had to at least try.

hey, it’s harry. how was that secret meeting of urs?

Returning to his desk, Harry was surprised when his phone pinged. He didn’t take her for a quick responder. His smile fell when he saw it was a text from Jeff. He never texts, he was an email addict. He had a template for almost anything.

What the hell did you do, Styles? Y/N Y/LN just left the office. Moving the protest to washington square.

Before he could respond, his phone pinged again, her contact name flashing at the top of the screen.

have you decided when you want to meet to sign the contract? :)

tags: @berrynarrybanana​ @brwnskin-bunnyteeth​ @harry-is-my-medicine​ @detroitkiwis​ @theresthingsthatwellneverknow @fromyourstrulyh​ @cassiopeiaskies​ @ggaayyyong @mortumnoctis

[telli1206]

You’re So Fine, You Blow My Mind (Part 2)

Tourney player Jay is smitten with the new cheerleader, and Evie and Mal help get them together.

Click here for Part 1: Jay

Part 2: Mal

Evil, there’s so much about tourney that Mal just can’t stand.

First off, the uniforms? They make sense to wear during games, kind of, but could they look anymore pansy-ish? Shiny blue and gold jerseys and shorts in silky soft materials? Not her idea of threatening or intimidating. These Auradonians make everything look so overdressed and...fancy.

And the games? With people watching and chanting stupid rhymes about defense and winning, with their faces painted blue and gold? It’s embarassing that anyone would want to act like that, especially to cheer on a fight over a ball. It would actually be similar to watching fights break out on the isle, if people here weren’t so weird about dressing up and singing for it.

For those reasons, and a few more, it took A LOT of convincing from Jay to get Mal to try out for tourney. But he won her over, of course. Jay always knew how to get through to Mal. 

Not that she’d ever admit to that.

But at the end of the day, how could she turn down the opportunity to take her aggression out on a few Auradonian boys on the tourney field? 

Especially Chad. Damn, Jay really knew her weaknesses.

But she’s a good friend too, so she’s VERY familiar with Jay’s weaknesses. And right now, his biggest weakness is ruining her practice and annoying the hell out of her.

She’s referring, of course, to the brain in his pants.

And that brain has completely taken over Jay today. Just one look at the new cheerleader boy, and her new best friend and teammate has been reduced to a clumsy, awkward, stuttering mess. Drills were a disaster, every play they ran was a complete failure, and Mal’s limping off the field now that Jay managed to trip her and knock them both into the ground during laps. 

She hisses quietly as she brushes the dirt off the scrape on her knee, scowling at Jay, who simply shrugs at her and jogs towards the locker rooms, stumbling again on the way when he catches another glimpse of the freckled cheerleader in his peripheral vision.

Ok, fuck this shit. Mal’s fixing the problem, RIGHT NOW.

“Babe!” She calls to Evie as she waves, sprinting over to the pretty bluenette cheerleader.

Evie turns with a bright smile, already leaning forward to meet her girlfriend in a sweet kiss.

“You were fantastic out there today, Mals. The star of practice,” she raves, giving her a wink.

Mal loses her train of thought for a second, smiling and blushing furiously at the compliment.

“Thanks, Eves. I thought it went well today.” Her face turns serious as she remembers her problem. “For me at least. I don’t know if you saw, but someone had a really off day today.”

Evie purses her lips with a slight nod. “Jay? The poor guy, he couldn’t catch a break today. I guess everyone has a day that goes all wrong, right?”

“Sure, that can happen,” Mal surmises with a tilt of her head. “But in this case, it wasn’t just a bad day. Jay’s, problem, has a face. A pretty one.”

Evie giggles, shaking her head. “Of course. When doesn’t it? Who’s the goof all twitterpated for now?”

Mal spins on her heel, crossing her arms as she eyes the boy, now chatting with Jane, arms gesturing wildly in a passionate discussion. She hears words like ‘cosine’ and ‘tangent’ and has to chuckle. Her bestie’s fallen for a hot little nerd.

“Your new guy over there has my best friend tripping over his own feet. We need to do him a favor and introduce them. I don’t think he’ll manage this time without us. The guy’s a little hopeless right now.”

Evie’s eyes light up when she sees who Mal’s talking about. “You mean Carlos?!” She squeals and jumps happily, clapping her hands. “He’s ADORABLE, and the sweetest thing! Oh, he’s perfect for Jay!”

Mal smirks and drops her hands to her hips. Her girlfriend will forever love playing matchmaker.

“Good, but we’ll need to be there to help loverboy. I have a feeling this won’t go smoothly without us. But don’t worry, I have a plan,” Mal adds with a calculated grin.

-----

“So, why do you want to eat lunch in the courtyard today? I thought you liked the middle garden cause it’s less crowded.” Jay follows Mal, grabbing an apple on  their way out of the cafeteria with their trays.

“What, is it so wrong to want a change of scenery one day? I’m not a creature of habit, Jay. I can be spontaneous.”

“Ok,” He chuckles, shining the apple against his vest. “Except you can’t.”

Mal glares at him but keeps walking. 

“Evie’s already saved us a table,” she adds as they turn the corner. She smiles when she spots the girl at the table right in front of them. “And” She nods her head, gesturing for Jay to look. “She brought a friend to join us.”

Jay’s about to take a bite out of the apple, but freezes when he looks up ahead. Evie’s at the table with...his freckled cheerleader boy. He stands there, mouth agape, refusing to move.

Mal rolls her eyes and grabs at his arm, pulling him along. He finally stumbles into step with her up to the table.

Evie and the boy both look up, smiling. Mal smiles back and drops herself in the seat across from Evie, leaving Jay in front of his crush. He quirks a smile and slowly plops himself down, catching himself when he almost drops the apple in his hand. He swings back up quickly with an awkward chuckle.

“Mal! Jay!” Evie sings sweetly. She reaches for the boy’s hand on the table and squeezes it gently. “I’d like you to meet Carlos! He just transferred here last week. And he’s our newest cheerleader.” She comments with a wide smile, which Carlos returns.

“Hi! It’s nice to meet you. Both of you,” he says cheerfully, offering a tiny wave.

“Carlos! I saw you at practice yesterday, you’ve got some pretty sweet moves,” Mal comments.

Carlos’ smile widens at Mal’s praise, and a light pink flush spreads quickly across his cheeks, starkly brightening his face against the pale skin and freckles. 

He’s cute. Really cute. Mal can definitely see why Jay’s so smitten.

“Thanks, Mal. I really love dancing. It was super exciting to make the squad. Evie’s put together some great routines.” He leans into Evie as she smiles and throws an arm around his shoulders for a side hug.

“And you’ve had some great ideas already, Carlos! I can’t wait to see what we can do together.”

Jay clears his throat, grabbing everyone’s attention. Mal sees his hand under the table between them, clenched tightly and at his side.

“Y-Yeah, Carlos.” He says weakly, curling his lips into a half-smile. “I saw you too. You’re...really good.”

Carlos spins back to meet Jay’s eyes with a warm smile, cheeks still flushed and adorable.

“Thanks, Jay.”

Mal bites back a laugh, shaking her head at Jay. He’s so shaky and nervous, totally not the suave flirt she’s used to seeing. And he’s joining late to the conversation and being SO awkward.

He’s so fucked for this kid. It’s time to step in and help.

“So, Carlos. Are you just new to our school, or new to Auradon City too?”

“Both!” He answers brightly, turning to Mal. “We lived in Camelot Heights before, but Roger and Anita thought it would be better for me here. Auradon Prep is known for their Math and Science programs.”

Mal quirks a brow. That explains his excited math chatter with Jane earlier. She peeks at Jay, who’s still listening intently to Carlos, resting his head in his hands with a stupid grin on his face. Obviously the nerd vibe hasn’t phased him at all.

“That’s great! Math and Science aren’t really my thing, but they have a lot of options here to keep you happy if you’re into that stuff.”

She leans in a little, offering a tiny smille. “But have you had any time to explore the city? There’s a lot of great restaurants and shops and stuff.”

Carlos shakes his head, waving his hand around in a circle. “This place is so big, and between tryouts, getting my schedule and taking the tour, I’ve barely even had time to get settled in my room.”

“Well! That’s got to change.” Mal pops back upright. “Evie and I are obsessed with the Auradon City Grille. They have the best burgers around.” Evie’s eyes widen as she nods excitedly at Carlos.

“Yes! And then we always hit up Mrs.Pott’s after for coffee or tea and some of her cupcakes. They’re my favorite,” she gushes, clasping her hands gleefully.

“Ooooh. That sounds great!” Carlos’ eyes light up with excitement. “Do they have chocolate cupcakes? I’m a sucker for chocolate.”

“Yes!” Mal jumps in. “You have to try it.”

Carlos nods eagerly. “I’m in! That sounds like fun! When are we going?”

Before Evie can respond, Mal reaches out to clasp her hand. She smiles knowingly, and Evie closes her mouth, perking her eyebrows in silent agreement.

“Actually, Evie and I are going to be pretty busy this week. I’m bombing Chemistry at the moment, so she’s going to help me study.”

“Oh, ok.” Carlos’ face drops a little in disappointment.

“But!” Mal claps Jay on the shoulder. “Jay here should be free.”

Jay chokes on his water, sputtering as he swallows his mouthful. He looks at Carlos, who’s staring back, and looking, hopeful.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, I’m free.” Jay swallows loudly. “D-do you wanna go t-t-tomorrow night?”

Carlos smiles full and wide, showing a mouth of gleaming white, perfect teeth.

“Yeah. It’s a date.”

[bluegalaxygirl]

I couldn't sleep last night and I was so hungry that I thought of something really weird so here is the clones favourite foods or drink.

Rex - chicken pasta bake with extra cheese. After saving a town on a mission a old lady baked him and his team chicken pasta bake and he loved it. He will ask the chef on the ship to cook it for him and even buy the ingrediance for it.

Fives - he loves cake but not just any cake vanilla party tray bake cake. It's so sweet and has sweats on top. He could eat a whole one but refrains from doing so.

Echo - like is batch mate fives he also loves cake but it's red velvet cake he prefers. He's not fussed on the icing it's the soft cake he loves the most.

Jesse - yager bombs are his favourite. When out at the clone bar he will chose yager bombs all the time. He doesn't do it to get drunk he just loves the taste.

Kix - smoothies at first it was a practical thing so that he could eat well drink while he works but one time he was eating a pizza with the boys when he got a call to deal with something as a jock hardcase blended the pizza and gave it to kix. Now it's becaone a thing. He will blend anything and drink it while on the job and its become his favourite thing.

Hardcase - a burger is his favourite and give him all the toppings, lettuce, tamato, grilled onions, tamato scuase, bacon, the full 9 yards. He loves the grease and after a long day in battle he wants nothing more than to chow down one something big a greassy

Tup -salted caramel milkshake with whipped cream and salted caramel popcorn. He's a little embarrassed about it and hardly drinks it in front of the others but he can't help but love it. It's so sweet and makes him feel happy and ready to go.

Dogma - he will tell anyone he isn't prick and doesn't have a favourite food but he actually does he loves mint chocolate chip ice cream he will eat a whole tub if he's having a bad day.

Cody -he really likes bagles and likes to experiment with toppings his best so far are cream cheese with apple and bannana with honey. He will eat bagles plain from time to time and doesn't really care what people think about is strange food combinations

Wolffe - this boy loves his coffee mainly because he needs 5 cups just to wake up in the morning. The coffee is always 4 tea spoons of coffee and boiling hot water no milk and no sweetener just pure caffeen.

Cross hair - tea, a cup of hot tea with a bit of milk and one sweetener. He has tried different kinds of tea but prefers to stick to the normal type although when sick or angry he will drink chamonile tea.

Hunter - a hot pot, he's an OK cook but is really good at hot posts filled with potato's carrots, onions, beef and beef stock. He will make some for his whole team and likes to cook it on an open fire to give the meat a more smokey flavour.

Wrecker - pizza and pineapple, of cause the others find it grose and weird but he can't help but love it

Tech - he loves any food thst might help boost his brain power but his favourite is smoked salmon. He often cooks salmon along with eggs, onions and brockily, he has reaserched all the ways to cook salmon and has masted the art of cooking salmon but he still loves it smoked above all the rest

Thank you all for the love. I won't be doing or taking any requests for a while and will just be posting when I want to or when I think of something.

[kunderdogs]

Take A Chance IV

Simon Dominic (AOMG) x Y/N (Reader) Genre: Romance / Angst Count: 2.4k+ Warnings: None Rating: Mature (suggestive, swearing) Summary: Who would’ve thought a one night stand with Simon D would turn into FWB? It only gets more complicated when you developed feelings, against your better judgement.

Chapter One. | Chapter Two. | Chapter Three. | Chapter Four. | Chapter Five. | Chapter Six. | Chapter Seven. |

Over the course of two weeks, you and Kiseok had a pretty good routine going on. He didn't come over every night, more like every other but he called and texted you nearly every chance he got.

At first you didn't think anything of it. He would ask you how your day was, if you ate and how you were feeling. Nothing crazy or out of pocket. It was innocent most of the time, and usually followed up by making plans to see you later on.

There was nothing you could do to stop your heart from bursting out of your chest each time you heard a small chime. Nicole had glared at you once when you two were on lunch and you scrambled over the table to reach your phone.

"Is that Lover Boy?" She teased. You were thankful that, out of all the nicknames she could've used - and she had a lot of them -, lover boy was the one she had stuck with. For now.

"What?" You feigned ignorance, "I have no idea what you're talking about. That's...Amazon. My package was delivered."

She smirked, sipping her iced tea, "I'm sure it was."

After a few days, Kiseok's texts became a little more...risky. You had no problem with sexting. When in the right setting, it was hot but he would send you wild shit while you're in the middle of a meeting, or when you're trying to finish up the last of your work before heading to see him. Usually you could play it off then retreat to the bathroom to respond but when he sent a voice recording of that damned deep voice of his, you stood from your desk and went to the stairs corridor to call and cuss him out for getting you bothered at eleven in the morning. You promised punishment as soon as you were off and Kiseok was, to say the least, intrigued. That night he was stunned at how different you could be if he gave you the reigns. Days after that, he still catches himself staring after you with amazement.

From that point on, he pretty much figured out that he could make you do nearly anything with a certain voice. It was a dangerous game that you two played. It only escalated when he coaxed you to touch yourself in the private bathroom at your company with him on FaceTime. You were lucky that you had finished in record-breaking time, before any of your coworkers (or God forbid, your boss) found out what exactly you were doing.

By the time the third week rolled around, Nicole had stopped hounding you for details of your hookups. Instead, she cautioned every now again. Typically, it was the same thing.

"Don't get too attached."

"He's a celebrity. You know how society is to foreigners dating celebs."

"What if he's a player? I just don't want you to get hurt."

While you appreciated her concern, you knew it was already too late not to get attached to him. Other than text you constantly, Kiseok did little things that had your head and heart confused.

On his bad days, he would complain to you about what happened and asked for your advice, if you had any to give, on the topic. He joked and teased you just like a friend would and willingly showed you pieces of his personal and work life as well. It was subtle at first - videos of him in the studio and then pictures of his friends when he was telling you a story about them. Each time, he would bring you food or have something delivered so you both got to learn each other's eating and drinking habits. You had seen him tipsy but he made it a point not to over do it in front of you.

Kiseok was also very considerate of you and your time, which you appreciated more than anything else. He didn't hound you if you didn't text back immediately and understood if you were swamped at the office or had to cancel that one time because the work would not be done until late in the night. He just told you to take care of yourself and later, had a pizza ordered to your job. It was around that time that you noticed you were falling a little too fast. You hadn’t admitted it out-loud, instead you chose to ignore those feelings completely. Hopefully, they would magically disappear into thin air.

You both didn't get into intimate details of your life. It was only by a weird stroke of luck that he hadn't found out about Cookie. She usually called right after you got off work anyway. Kiseok was busy during the day so when you went out to meet with your daughter and her father on your off days, he was in the middle of his own jam-packed schedule. Really, he was only available during the night time so you were more of a booty call than a FWB at this point. Neither of you had defined the "relationship" so far though, so it was hard to put a name to it right now.

It was Saturday when you woke up early and got dressed in casual clothes to go with Cookie to the zoo. Her, her father and his girlfriend were flying back to the US tonight so they wanted to do one last thing to fill the hours before the boring plane ride. You had cried last night as you thought of being without your mini-me for two whole months but his family hadn't seen her since she was much younger. You knew she would have fun, especially since his parents were dying to take her to Disneyland. You wished you could take an extended vacation and go with them but you had used most of your vacation days to take Cookie to Disney World for her birthday and that was only a couple of months ago.

Either way, you were sadder these past two days and thankfully Kiseok was swamped with an upcoming project so he hadn't been over in about four days. You didn't have to explain your blood-shot eyes.

You had so much fun at the zoo with your daughter that you didn't bother touching your phone. Your ex had taken most of the pictures for you all with promises to send them to you. It was around two in the afternoon when you four decided to go to a nearby burger joint and get some lunch. Cookie was shoving her face with chicken tenders so you decided to check your phone to pass the time. There were a few new gray message bubbles.

'Hey sexy thang ;)' 10:09AM

'This song better go double platinum with all the work I'm puttin in this bitch' 11:32AM

'Don't tell me you're asleep still?' 11:38AM

'I'm going to find a way to get your sexy ass as a video vixen one of these days' 11:47AM

'Argggh PD is calling me back. Text me when you wake up' 11:51AM

'We should be done by 2. Loco is taking me to some new place for food then I'm free. Can I swing by your place?' 11:52AM

Of course they were all from Kiseok. Not even your mother texted you as much as he did and although you liked the attention, right now you wanted to focus on Cookie since you won't physically see her for weeks after this. You frowned to yourself, feeling tears well up in your eyes for the millionth time today. You were going to miss her so much.

Composing yourself, you quickly typed a reply back. 'Hey. I'm up, just a little busy today. I won't be able to see you tonight. Maybe tomorrow if you're free?' 2:16PM

With that, you locked your phone and slid it in your pocket, once again forgetting about it soon after.

Your ex's girlfriend, Mia, nudged you slightly when she saw how pensive you were. "Hey, you okay? Was that work?"

Shaking your head, you took a breath, "No, I'm just gonna miss having my best friend around."

Cookie popped up, french fries sticking out of her mouth, "I'm gonna miss you too, mommy!" Her curly hair was pulled into two pony-tails, coils springing happily as she devoured the food in record-breaking time. "Don't cry! I'll make daddy buy you a Tiana dress so we can match!"

You laughed at the sight, tears pooling in your eyes again as her father pouted. "Ok, sweetie, I'd love to match with you."

About thirty minutes later, you all were getting ready to leave when Mia said she'd swing by and grab the rental car from the parking lot. They had to go to back to their hotel to pack. You all said your goodbyes, tears flowing freely between you and Mia. Cookie looked concerned for you as she wiped your tears, kissing your cheeks to reassure you.

Your ex hugged you and thanked you again, his eyes sparkling with happiness to have his precious daughter with him. You wished you could go with them once again as you watched their car drive off.

Back at home, you were greeted with a depressingly quiet apartment. It was cold and dark, something that was going to be a common occurrence for the coming weeks. Sniffling, you made your way to Cookie’s room, scanning her pink room with a blurring gaze. You were slowly walking around the room when you felt your phone ring.

It was Mia.

"Hello?" You called, wondering what could've happened in the last hour since you parted ways.

"Hey, Y/N, Cookie is freaking out because her father forgot to ask you to bring her Peach doll," Mia nearly shouted over the distraught crying in the background. You could hear your ex trying to console Cookie, to no avail. "Can you meet us at the airport with it?"

Searching the room, you spotted the Princess Peach doll on her bed and nearly sprinted out of the door. "I got it. When is your flight again?"

"Boarding is in another hour and a half."

Shit. You scrambled to snatch your keys and shoved the doll in your purse. "Okay, I'll leave now and meet you at departures, okay? Tell Cookie mommy's on the way."

You hung up and made a mad dash down to the parking garage. The airport was about a forty-five minute drive from your place, not including traffic or any other delays like the predictable Seoul rush hour.

At his own apartment, Simon was lounging on his couch, laptop on his chest as he worked. Loco was right next to him, on Face Time with the one and only Jay Park as he was at the airport.

"Have a safe flight," Loco was saying before Kiseok slid shoulder-to-shoulder with him.

"Get there and back in once piece, boss," the oldest one teased and Jay laughed. Unfortunately, he was distracted a little too long because he suddenly collided into a woman. The phone fell, face up and there were suddenly two faces on the screen.

His body guards reacted immediately and made sure the two were alright. Mildly interested, the two on the other side of the line watched on.

"I-I'm so sorry, oh God, I'm just in a rush." The woman's voice was so eerily familiar to Kiseok that he took a second to strain to hear it over the airport commotion.

Jay was off to the side, picking up his passport and other belongings that fell. "Nah, it's alright. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, thank you. Again, I'm so sorry I wasn’t- Is this your phone?"

Without further ado, the woman picked up Jay's phone, and Kiseok felt his eyes bulge out of his skull when her face came into view.

What was Y/N doing in the airport? Loco didn't notice the other's tense reaction and simply waved at the stranger. You didn't seem to glance at the screen, yet they could easily notice your tear-stained cheeks, and just passed it back to the owner.

Over Jay reassuring her that it was fine for the third time, a loud and very male voice yelled. "Y/N! There you are!"

With another apology, you left the frame and turned towards the male voice. Jay watched the interaction for a second before continuing on his way, which was conveniently right past you. Loco was talking to the CEO like that didn't just happen when Kiseok saw you in the frame again. He was positive it was you this time around.

You wore that over-sized gray sweater that he thought was so cute on you, hair tied messily and hugging a handsome foreigner tightly. He pulled back from the hug and pushed back some pieces of your hair from your face before smiling, his lips moving. Staring up to him, you nodded, wiping your face with your sleeves. He brought you back to his chest, arms around your shoulders.

Involuntarily, Kiseok felt his jaw clench at the display of affection. His eyes tore from the phone quicker than he meant to, causing his junior to stare at him in confusion.

For the rest of the night, Loco was warily watching as the older man was fuming next to him. There was hardly any movement from his part and he was sure he was in a coma until Simon wiped out his phone, tapping it a few times before pressing it to his ear.

“Nayoung? It’s been a while. Are you free right now?”

Almost choking on his coke, Hyukwoo coughed. Why was Kiseok calling her, of all people? Once the call wrapped up, he nervously voiced his concern, “Hyung...Why are you calling her at this hour..?”

He didn’t get an immediate response, instead, Kiseok stood and glared with the power of a thousand suns at the TV in front of them.

“Am I not single? Can I not do what I want, with whoever I want, too?”

Without any further explanation, he stormed out of the apartment all together.

Hyukwoo stared after the front door in confusion. “Too?”

[what-big-teeth]

Spark (Male Fire Elemental, pt. 1)

When graduate student Simone Price inherits her deceased grandmother’s house, she hopes to mend bridges that were long burned prior to the sudden passing by way of fond memories. But she soon learns two important truths. One, the cause behind those severed connections is still around. Two, the childhood fables her grandmother told her are more rooted in reality than imaginative fantasy.

Female Human (POV) x Male Monster [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] ”It’s...charming, you know? Really rustic.” Mica carefully chooses her words and attempts a cheerful smile. When she fails, she settles on tucking a loose microbraid behind her deep brown ear. “Right, Mason?”

Mason hefts the large, black garbage bag full of cleaning tools off the ground, gives the old house a once-over from top to bottom, then snorts. Loudly. Mica swiftly elbows her twin in the ribs for “being rude”, but even I can’t stop my nose from scrunching up in displeasure. 

She can dress up her opinion with as many euphemisms as she wants. But the truth is plain as day: Nana’s place has gone to the dogs. 

The two story’s once brilliant white paint is a dingy, chipping mess that reveals the underlying dark decay. The windows, always transparent enough to see through when the curtains were drawn back, are caked with grime and rust. And the front door, a deep, beautiful burgundy my mind can still picture, has dulled into a paler shade of red. I wouldn’t be surprised if Nana’s little garden in the backyard has been choked by weeds and overrun with wild plants. It saddens me to see the current state of her home compared to when my visits were more common. That was before Dad suddenly severed all contact with Nana ten years ago, when I was only thirteen.

A warm weight settles onto my shoulder, fending off the morning’s autumnal chill. Mica wears a sympathetic smile.

“Are you alright, Simone?”

I’ll never be able to thank Mica and Mason enough for sacrificing part of their Thanksgiving break to help me out. But I can try by remaining as positive as possible. 

“I will be,” I say. “Once Nana’s place starts looking like it used to.”

“It’s your house now,” Mason says, adjusting his grip on the garbage bag. Oddly enough, his words sound sad. “You sure you don’t want to do anything different with it?”

It came as a shock when Nana’s last will and testament bequeathed the entirety of her property and assets to me. Dad did all he could to contest the document, but his attempts failed. I’ll never forget the haunted look in his dark eyes when I asked him why he disagreed with my newfound inheritance.

“That place isn’t a home, baby. Not with what it’s got locked inside of it.”

I later refused to budge on the matter, even when he begged me to. After that, Dad told me to do as I wished, but to be careful and stay vigilant. I didn’t understand what he meant then and I still don’t. But I hope, with some hard work and lots of love, Nana’s house will be whole again. Then with time, Dad will come to visit and remember the good times before his mother’s passing.

“Earth to Simone,” Mason says. “Did you hear me?”

“Yeah, and I’m sure.” I fish out the front door key from my coat pocket and smile. “Let’s get to work.”

We hang our coats in the entryway. Once the buckets, brooms, and mops are divvied up among us, Mason works on doling out the cleaning solution. We then decide on who gets what area. Mason is quick to claim the upstairs, citing the possibility of rotten wood weakening the floor.

“I’d rather fall to the first floor and get hurt than see it happen to you two,” he says in an obstinate tone. “Especially since you two might end up worse off.”

“Always the gentleman,” Mica mutters, rolling her light brown eyes. “I’ll take the kitchen and dining room. Might be worth it to see what condition your Nana’s cookware is in.”

“Good idea,” I say. “Just be sure to yell if you find anything interesting.”

“Will do!” She grabs her broom, bucket, and mop,then leaves the foyer.

“Guess that leaves me with the living room and fireplace,” I say.

Mason replies with a hum I can’t discern, which is weird since Mica and I are fluent in Mason-ese. Always have been since we were little kids.

“Something up?” I ask.

His neutral expression doesn’t reveal a thing and that worries me. He’s always had a tell or two, even when he’s tried to hide something from me. Instead of talking, he just ties back his dreadlocks, grabs his share of the cleaning supplies, and walks towards the stairs.

“Call me if you need anything.”

I follow his old sneakers until they vanish from my line of sight. That was weird. But there’s no point in digging to figure out what’s going on. He’ll tell me when he feels like it.

After locking the front door and grabbing a broom, my feet guide me down the main hallway towards the living room. And my heart nearly breaks at the sight. Just about everything is covered in a thin layer of dust and cobwebs, including Nana’s knitting basket and needles. The floor and rug are worst off and I’m somewhat scared to tackle the fireplace. But if I don’t, no one else besides Mica and Mason will. Especially not anyone in town.

After asking for directions and mentioning our reasons for being here, nearly everyone bid us a swift farewell, claiming they had something to do. Only a few upfront people told us to leave the estate alone and head back home, claiming that a witch once lived there.

My grip on the broom handle tightens to the point of pain.

Nana was many things; a huge sun tea addict, an amazing storyteller, and a wonderful knitter. She may have used Black folk magic to help me with my childhood night terrors, but she wasn’t a—

“Ow!”

A thick wooden splinter peers up at me from my index finger alongside a bead of blood. This is why I told Mason we should’ve packed the plastic brooms instead. I lean the broom against the brick mantle, swiftly remove the sliver, and flick it into the dead fireplace.

The piled ash sparks with light and heat, singeing the cobwebs. 

“What in the…”

“Simone!”

“Gah!” I wait until my racing pulse calms a bit then respond. “Yeah?”

“I found your Nana’s bundt cake pan,” Mica yells out, “but I can’t tell if it’s still usable.”

“I’ll be there in a moment!”

I look back at the fireplace. Nothing but cold ash. I shake my head and make my way to the kitchen, trying to recall where Mason keeps the mini first-aid kit in his pickup truck.

Midday sneaks up on us, warming the chilly house a few more degrees. Mica decides it’s the perfect time to break for lunch and Mason agrees.

“We passed by a burger joint on the main road,” Mica says, wiping off her hands. “Wanna give it a try?”

Even with the tempting prospect of a patty melt, my mind keeps drifting back to the fireplace. And what I think I witnessed.

“Sure, but do you guys mind going without me? I want to get more cleaning in before the day’s out.”

“Seriously?” Mason is quick to call out my attempt at an excuse. “We’ve been at it for four hours.”

Before Mica can chastise him for being, well, himself, I think up a compromise.

“What if I took an extended break instead? I won’t touch a broom, mop, or bucket while you guys are out and I’ll eat with you once you get back. Sounds good?”

“Sounds perfect!” Mica chirps up. She grabs Mason by his forearm and starts hauling him towards the foyer before he can object. “We’ll be back soon. A patty melt with onions and a small fry?”

“And a bottled water too, please!”

The front door slams shut, the sound echoing until the truck’s engine revs up. I let out a heavy sigh and plop down onto the couch, uncaring of the weak cushioning.

“Finally. I thought they’d never leave.”

I stop myself from launching off the sofa, but my feet still slip on the area rug. My ass slams onto the floor with a hard thud and a deep chuckle follows soon after.

“You’re not very graceful, are you?”

“Who—!”

A large, bright flame emerges from the ash piled in the fireplace. It twists and curls in random patterns until it settles into the distinctive outline of a humanoid face. It grins. I scramble away and slam into the opposite wall.

“What’s this?” it says. “A descendant of Abigail, afraid of me?”

No shit. Who in their right mind wouldn’t be? But, as the barely-calm-and-reasonable part of my brain points out, I won’t get any answers if I let my tongue turn into lead.

“Who are you? How do you know Nana?”

The flame…face…creature remains silent far longer than need be. Its eyes narrow.

“Don’t mock me, girl. You know very well who I am. Or did you forget Abigail’s tales all too quickly?”

The creature’s words slowly begin to make sense, as much as my mind begs them not to. Nana used to tell me all kinds of stories when I was little. But she’d always retell my favorite whenever I asked: the story of a fearless Black girl who trapped an evil flame spirit, thereby saving the town she lived in.

“Oh my god. That story was about you?”

“Cruel, isn’t it? Conditioning a child to believe a lie through a simple fable. All whilst I could hear and see everything. Abigail was always a manipulative, abusive wench.”

Hot, white anger floods my body, wrenching me to my feet. 

“Like hell,” I hiss, stalking towards the fireplace.

The creature peers up at me, stunned and silent. Good.

“Nana would never harm anyone. But she sure as hell didn’t take shit from anybody. Ever. What did you do?”

The story always characterized the fire spirit as evil, but never gave a reason. So why not ask the source?

“Well?!”

“Simone?”

My gaze snaps up. Mason stares at me with brows furrowed with concern and confusion. My rage dissipates into nothing, leaving me drained.

“You alright?” he asks.

I glance down at the fireplace. The creature’s vanished. Leaving me to look like an utter fool.

“Uh, yeah! I was just…re-enacting a scene from my favorite drama! Nothing else to do while waiting for you guys to get back, right?”

Mason’s eyes narrow, the simple action screaming ‘bullshit’. “Not even looking at your phone?”

I jam my hand inside my back jeans pocket and pull out my smartphone. Surprisingly, there’s service.

“Not enough bars,” I lie.

Mason doesn’t look convinced in the slightest, but thankfully, he lets my horrible excuse slide. He holds up a large, white paper bag stained with grease. The scent wafting from the inside makes my empty stomach clench with anticipation.

“Mica and I will be in the dining room. Be sure to come and eat while the food’s hot.”

He walks off, the wooden floor creaking underneath his every step. With a heavy sigh, I start to follow.

“Perhaps you are more like Abigail than I first believed: utterly stubborn and foolishly brave.”

I stop moving. If the creature’s words were meant to insult me, they fail. Pride wells up in me and it takes all my willpower to not smile. It somehow notices and scoffs.

“To answer your earlier questions, past humans have called me a fire elemental. And one gave me the name Ignis.”

The creature...Ignis begins to recede back into the ash pile, but my mouth opens before it can vanish.

“Wait.”

He does, to my surprise.

“You weren’t awake before we arrived, right? Which means something made you come around.”

I carefully recall Nana’s story, then all of the related events leading up until now. My eyes widen.

“It was my blood on the splinter. That’s what woke you up. Because I’m of her bloodline.”

Ignis continues to sink further into the ash, but says one last thing.

“You have a sharp mind as well. How interesting…”

The fireplace goes dark, but I stand before it, staring.

I get it now. I understand why Dad severed contact with Nana ten years ago and never wanted me to inherit this place. Why Nana told me those childhood fables and willed her home to me.

But Dad’s still wrong. This house will be a home. But first, I have to finish what Nana started.

[jackjots]

#25 Divide

Wayward Guide for the Untrained Eye 30 Day Prompt

(This takes place after Episode 10)

Day #25 @30daysofwayward

(I do not own any other characters or place names outside of Shelby St. Ranger, this is just for fun)

Even though I hadn’t asked permission of the werewolves themselves about writing a book concerning the Connor Creek werewolves, I was excited enough at even the glimmer of possibility that I began to hammer out my novel in progress the very evening Aubrey had stopped by to inquire about doing so. Only occasionally stopping to stuff my face with chunks of cheese and some unsatisfying crackers, I wrote into the night. I finally ripped myself away from the computer before dawn could come and remind me in loud stripes across the sky that I had been awake far too long. If my eyes closed while it was still dark out, it didn’t count, or at least that’s what I told myself. 

I slept for only a few hours before my brain woke me up. I had to write. I drank coffee and hardly touched the oatmeal I had made out of habit. The hunger had completely emptied my fridge of anything protein packed. After a few hours of fighting the growling in my stomach, I decided a trip into town was necessary. I was too hungry and impatient to walk, so I drove into town.

I almost went straight to the butcher, but I was feeling light headed and decided it would be good to hit two birds with one stone and both get dinner and pay off my bill at the Dead Canary. 

Desmond greeted me with a nod. “What can I do you for, Shelby?”

“I’d like to both pay my bill and also get a rare burger if possible.” I paused, considered how weird this was about to sound, ignored that fear and pressed on. “Instead of fries, could I get a hot dog?” 

“Sure thing.” He didn’t seem surprised. This bothered me more than I thought it would. “I’ll just total that all up for you now. Anything to drink?”

“Iced tea, I’m driving. Do you know if the butcher is open today?”

“Vern? Most likely.” Again, no questions, no surprise. 

He handed me the bill, which was handwritten. I looked over it and frowned. “This can’t be right. This isn’t enough. Desmond-”

“It’s correct.” He waved me away. “That’s that.”

“But, this can’t be-”

“It’s correct.” He said it pointedly with intense eye contact and I paid it without another word. 

Quinn was not happy with my order. I heard him before I saw him come out of the kitchen holding the ticket with my order on it. I was stuffing change back into my pocket when he came out and pointed at me. “Shelby, what is this?”

“I know Quinn, I’m sorry. I’ll take an aioli for the hot dog, and bleu cheese on the burger? If that helps?” 

“I am going to pretend that these are two different dishes, for two different people, and can I please make you a salad with beets and goat cheese, with a raspberry vinaigrette?” His words were so impassioned you would have thought he was berating an unfaithful lover.

I nodded, a bit too stunned to fight off the salad, knowing full well I wouldn’t eat it. 

“Thank you.” He flourished the ticket around and went back.

“Do I owe you for the salad?” I asked Desmond awkwardly.

He shrugged. “You gunna eat it?”

“Probably not.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He handed me my iced tea and turned right back around to wiping glasses with the towel on his shoulder. 

I left a big enough tip that would cover the salad regardless, after considering how much money he’d just saved me, and slid into the booth with the iced tea in my hand and tried to not think about how hungry I was.

It wasn’t until I had eaten the entire hotdog and half of the hamburger I realized the bar was empty and I could talk to Desmond about holding a meeting with the other werewolves, to inquire about writing a book with Aubrey. I finished the burger and Desmond came up as the last bite disappeared with a small bag. He put a finger up to his lips before I could ask what he was doing as he chucked the salad into the bag and swiftly threw the bag away before taking my dishes. I realized he was both covering for me so Quinn would be neither upset with me, nor suspicious of me from any lingering werewolf idea, and also it probably would make Quinn happy that I had eaten everything. Not that he would ever say, of course. 

I followed him up to the bar and sat down. 

It was enough to get his attention when he came back from the kitchen. He put both hands on the bar. “Something on your mind?” 

“Yes, actually.” I looked around. Quinn was out of ear shot, as far as I could tell. “I had a question.”

“Shoot.”

“I was wondering if I could ask permission of all of you, to work on a book, with Aubrey.” 

“Aubrey.” Desmond tilted his head. “A book? About…”

“Connor Creek. Specifically, you know.”

Desmond got it; his eyes widened and then he nodded. “I’ll talk to them. But I can’t imagine it will be a popular idea.” 

I scratched my head. “I know. What about Artemis and Paul? Their podcast?”

“That LSD story.” 

The LSD story that had saved the town from a murderous divide I thought. “Ah.” I tapped the counter as I thought. “Maybe we could make it seem fictional? I’m not sure if Aubrey would like that idea though.”

“His family believed for a real long time.” Desmond nodded. “I know it means a lot to him to know the truth.” Desmond held eye contact with me. “The truth can be real nice.” 

I broke the eye contact as I got off the barstool. “Alright, well if you could mention it to them?”

“I’ll ask.” 

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Shelby.” 

As soon as I stepped out of the Dead Canary I knew I had made a mistake. He had thought I was going to ‘come out’ as it were, as a werewolf. Or half wolf? Whatever it was. But instead, I had asked to publicize the existence of werewolves. Or maybe he still didn’t know, and I was just feeling guilty and projecting that onto Desmond’s simple and clear mannerisms. 

I got meat from Vern, who was preoccupied talking to Olivia who had stopped in for what they called “a tasting”. I wasn’t sure exactly what that entailed, but there were empty wine glasses filled with the distinct scent of meat. If I hadn’t been full, I might have inquired further. But as it was, I got a good amount of cuts and went to the market for eggs, cheese, and some milk. 

As I was going to my car, I saw a ticket under the windshield wiper. I looked around, confused. I’d parked in a perfectly fine place. I put the groceries in the back and grabbed the ticket- it was a note. It said “We need to talk.” On the other side it was a parking ticket form, that just said VOID in big letters across it. I knew it from Helen. It said 7pm. I turned on my car to see what time it was. I really needed a watch now that I didn’t have my phone on me all the time. I had a few hours, so I decided I’d go home, make a meat snack, write a few pages, and then come back.

 I decided I would walk, because I had a feeling after this particular meeting, I’d need a drink.