#He was lured out with a rabbit tho

[the-memel0rd]

*Spits this out And runs away*

Just little doodle they are homies fr tho

[idswolf]

Hehehe Hello! Tis your secrettttt skeletonnnn!

I noticed on your wishlist you wanted to yap out some details about your goobers! I would love to draw either 4 armed Eclipse, Sunny Bunny, or Hallow, though you can yap to your heart's content about as many of your OCs as ya want! I do wanna see if these extra details will sway me even more onto one of your OCs hehehe

Btw, I am completely fine with gore too, so if your duders got some extra gruesome backgrounds I am able to handle them o7

OH MY GOSH HEWWO!! Let me just *scrambles to find my notes* alright so going down the list I’ll start with Eclipse!

Eclipse✨: Here’s so basic info I already had written down

• This Eclipse is from my security breach au called Won’t Die, they end up being one of Gregory’s protectors in it.

• I said they’re fusion of Sun and Moon and I mean that literally, in this au Sun and Moon are two separate beings in their own body and they literally combine together to make Eclipse.

• They’re kinda like Opal from Steven Universe in the sense they have a very one track mind and tend to focus on one thing and end up forgetting about other things they were meant to do

• They’re move around in the same creepy manner that Moon does in the games

• They’re 9’1 ft tall (not including the rays)

• They technically have 3 tails, the two ribbons on their backside and the hood of their lil cloak can move around like tails and the ribbon ones are strong enough to pick up Gregory!

• They are very willing to fight and or destroy stuff in order to complete their main goal

• They’re very protective and very strong (examples vvvvv)

The White Rabbit 🐰:

• So his name isn’t Sunny bunny, I just call him that to differentiate from my other Suns, he’s from my wonderland au and in it he’s either called Sun or the rabbit

• Sun is really kind to children but HATES adults, in fact he’s murdered multiple before in very gruesome ways, never in front of kids tho

• I want to make sure you know he genuinely cares about kids and loves making them smile whether it’s by doing fun activities with them or doing something silly to amuse them

• Him, along with most of the others from wonderland, want to kidnap kids so they can entertain them for forever, he actually lured Cassie (the Alice of this au) into wonderland without her knowing it was a trap

• He’s very manipulative and persuasive, this is how he helped keep kids from leaving wonderland in the past and how he got Cassie to help him in freeing the residents of wonderland

• He genuinely doesn’t think murdering people and kidnapping kids is a bad thing

• He’s an animatronic but he’s also semi organic

• He has a magical ability that lets him shift into a smaller form that looks like a rabbit(I sadly haven’t drawn it before), tho it’s smaller then his normal size it’s actually just a bit bigger than Cassie (she’s 3’9 ft for reference)

• He’s like 6’5 ft?? I never really figured out his height but it’s around that

Hallow 🎃 : Here’s some info I had written already

• The au Hallow is in is my seasonal au, basically magical creatures are the living embodiment of each season and of the four elements, other creatures there are also the embodiment of different things too like Hallow being the embodiment of Halloween

• The farm they live on isn’t in the human realm at all but is instead in a realm where magic and such run wild, the farm is ran by Maple (my grim Foxy) whose the embodiment of fire and autumn

• Hallow can only go to the human realm on Halloween but normal animals and humans are able to cross freely tho the areas to do so are very hidden so humans very rarely encounter the magical realm

• The character Hallow is most similar to is Jack Skellington, they’re both the embodiment of Halloween, tall spooky looking guys, mischievous, kind, and protective of their friends

• They can open their mouth and they have a very long goopy black tongue, I sadly don’t have a drawing of this but I have a drawing of a different character who has a tongue that’s similar to Hallow’s just not goopy like theirs is

Highly recommend looking at this art of Hallow as an example of the flames “leaking” out :] https://artfight.net/attack/7869231.dare-gone-wrong

[writtenbynath]

I'm not anon you answered a few hours ago but since I went thru a similar process (listened to his files, eventually sought out more info on the guy, stopped) 2ish years ago I wanted to add my 2 cents:

I found it quite easy to avoid themes of obsession, addiction and obedience in his (then) newer files bc he puts those as tags. his "entry level" files without those themes are not particularly addicting. he has a couple old entry level files that are not as well sanitised tho, and he produces a lot more content with those themes as than content without, so a new listener is likely to feel tempted to go back further and eventually branch out.

plus, the ultra convenient search and tagging system he uses is really good at creating a false sense of security thru ease of use, and the warnings themselves can serve to create feelings of false security as well.

my experience was that it's not each and every file that is addicting, though some are, and many use "my voice" type conventions that aren't unusual but could lead to someone's hypnokink focusing entirely on him and his files, so ymmv.

tldr; while not every file is the perfect snare for new victims, the site gives off the illusion of sanitised safety, which makes it so much easier to be lured in and fall down a potentially scary or dangerous rabbit hole.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom about Nimja's website and his files.

[the-kipsabian]

..okay you get one (1) rambly wrestle post out of me today cause i was going through my drafts and i had a Thought™ (dangerous i know)

so kip, butcher and blade, yeah?

actually just the gallery as a whole. so kip is obviously going through some shit. we saw the character/personality shift with the box. my thought always was (and still is, tbh, im not letting go of this one) that while penny didnt see anything wrong with him changing, she was also always a part of it. encouraging it. being an instigator in some sense or another. she was running this operation from the inside, in tandem with the box (and kip i guess lol)

but then you insert butcher and blade into it. these fellows probably have seen this shift, this change too, but where do they fit into this whole picture? well

first of, bunny. shes obviously also unhinged. we have seen this woman, not only with penny but also with her boys and on her own. "down the rabbit hole", you know? "we're all mad here" etc etc kinda spooky stuff, yeah? so shes just always been like this. her boys are used to this kind of behavior, so kip (and penelope to an extend i guess) doesnt strike them as any more odd than bunny being this way. especially since shes Just Like This, while kip has external things that affect that, so whats the difference, really

butcher and blade are also his friends. friends support friends etc., if youre off the hinges who cares lmao, especially since the group is just like that now. but more importantly, butcher and blade have more often been referred to as "hired guns". they are mercenaries. whoever gives them the best deal gets the services of their opponents getting the shit kicked out of them. there will be blood if you pay the price

now heres the kicker that made me want to break this down. what kip effectively promises them by being the hiring mastermind in this equation, is money, fortune and fame. eventually hopefully title belts, be that tag or trios. hes lifting them up, giving them hope, making them want things and showing the way to the fortune and glory

...in a similar, tho more direct and open way, as the international title is luring him in towards the same things with its call and promises

thanks for coming to my ted talk

[stariiuez]

WAIT WAIT YOU'VE ONLY DUMPED LORE ABT THE TOONS (MAINLY CC) EVERY NOW AND THEN, I GOTTA KNOW MORE ABT THEM!!!

(HCS mayhaps...??? :3)

Well... I do have some hcs teehee (though not too MUCH lore.. yet...)

Cartoon Cat, Cartoon Dog, as well as Yoyo, CM, and CR are all siblings!

All of the cartoons originally had no tails in their chosen form (except for CC, he always had one since the start), until Sparfy (and Yoyo!) somehow convinced the others to give themselves one (and ofc Sparfy made Yoyo a lil tail out of yarn cuz why not!!!)

And speaking of Yoyo and yarn, she made her mask herself out of yarn and a few other materials, originally it was just a mask, but over time, and how her form had changed, it eventually phased into her actual face, so she cannot take it off. She can however make expressions and whatnot obviously as it is her face, but her mouth cannot move, it always stays in that silly lil smile :3

All of the cartoons (except Yoyo) wear gloves, though the gloves are literally apart of their form and cannot be taken off, they still function and feel like regular gloves (they just didn't wanna remove em ig), but if they were to change their form and remove them, they'd all have paw pads!

While Yoyo has no 'regular' arms/hands, she does have her familiar and iconic claw arm thingies! Much like Sparfy she can actually have practically unlimited amounts of arms, but she usually just has the usual pair of two of just one (or none at all), it can be very useful! (They can also extend)

Cartoon Cat's tail is similar, it can extend and be used for moving/holding things, tho that's pretty much it (he can also balance on it obv ���)

All of the cartoons (excluding Yoyo) can have sharp teeth if desired! Not including CR tho as they always have sharp teeth cuz they just insane LMAO

While they can all feel pain, it's more tolerable based on their immortality and species, they can regenerate and pretty much are Gods or something anyway

All of the cartoons have very contrasted personalities from each other, Cartoon Cat being the most violent, Cartoon Rabbit being the most insane and deranged, Cartoon Dog being the most intelligent (especially in how he gets his victims and to lure them in), Cartoon Mouse just doesn't wanna hurt anyone (or even a fly), and Yoyo is just... Well, Yoyo.

Cartoon Cat hates country and any k-pop type music, he PHYSICALLY cannot stand it lmao

Yoyo blasts Nightcore and Vocaloid music (she once had Cartoon Cat listening to Fear Garden considering the contents of the song and he was just vibing to it lmao)

Cartoon Rabbit and Cartoon Cat are little pranksters and will do anything to ruin someone's day depending on who it is

Believe it or not, they all do eat and drink normal human concoctions from time to time (and by that I mean a lot of the time for a majority). With this in mind, Cartoon Dog likes pure black coffee with no sugar, sweetener or anything added, just plain ol' coffee... Yoyo refuses to drink coffee, CM doesn't even KNOW what coffee is, Cartoon Rabbit only drinks tea, and Cartoon Cat must pull a Meta Knight and have as much sugar, sweetener, creamer and any other very sweet thing usually used for said drink added to his coffee

I might have some more later man idk :p

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Howza bout a blueycapsules Funtime Fred x reader gender neutral where the reader and bon bon have to stop Fred from doing stupid things- Art anon

(Note this will take place when the funtimes are in CBEAR even tho the comic hasn't reached that point yet)

.........

Being the only technician working at CBEAR who was not fired (or dead) meant you had to deal with all of the animatronics’ shenanigans on your own.

Unbeknownst to William, you knew their true purpose and set out to help  them by secretly trying to reverse-engineer their special functions (so they can be reprogrammed to protect instead of kill).

With Funtime Freddy and Bonbon being a killing/luring duo you figured you’d start with them first.

And, well...let’s just say Freddy’s pronouns are dumb/ass.

Still dangerous, yes. He’s tried to sabotage your work and get you killed whenever you visit the breaker room. But he’s not the brightest and luckily for you his plans fail.

Bonbon keeps trying to tell him your body won’t fit inside the storage tank. Plus she actually kinda likes your company and doesn’t wanna see you get hurt :(

“C’mon Bonbon! We’re just trying to show our birthday buddy-y-y a fun time!!”

“Quit it with the puns. In case you haven’t noticed you’re t r a u m a t i z i n g them!!”

“Well of course I am, silly rabbit!!”

“...then STOP freaking doing that you dunce!!!”

You’re grateful she’s on your side, as she helped you avoid all of Freddy’s attempts to scare or snatch you with warnings.

You found out that teaching him games like “Red Light, Green Light” help him avoid coming near you till you’re finished with your work.

The other Funtimes marvel at how well you handle his stupidity. They like your “take-no-shit” attitude.

[fivekrystalpetals]

I have some 200+ questions about the story so far lol; I am on Retrace XXIII and I need some time to let everything sink in before I move on to the next arc; let me try to frame all my thoughts in a coherent and chronological manner (lol)

1] starting from Alice, because everything in this story seems to revolve around her: she was a human who lived 100 years ago and was murdered during the so-called Tragedy of Sablier with a pair of scissors. the current Chain Alice is only assuming her form and has no memories of her past (which she is trying to collect but I fear the picture they piece together won't be a good one)

after all (re: Rt. 16)--

because her memories were that painful.

I feel like the ‘twisted’ Alice is the actual, remnant spirit of human Alice that created both the dimension inside the musical watch and the one Cheshire is guarding, is also the one Oz met in Retrace I from the graveyard. tho, idk how human Alice became the Chain Alice. or, rather, in Break's words, which is the true version of the chain--is it the Rabbit or is it the girl?

2] Vincent and Gil belong to the same era as Alice. there is some time leap shenanigans going on with them, that's how they landed in the present (or, well, 15 years ago from the present). Gil got adopted in the Vessalius household (as a nine-year-old so 15+9=24) whereas Vincent in the Nightray one.

a minor point: how is Gil growing older with his contract with Raven whereas Break and Sharon stopped aging?

3] Vincent.....this man knows everything. literally everything. Please someone squeeze out the details from him, please. and he is involved (heavily) in the Tragedy, going by these two panels (Rt. 19)

(poor baby ;-; if I have to make a wild guess, either he was lured or brainwashed into this....and he immediately goes into defensive mode, claiming everything is 'that person' 's fault. who is that person? Glen? Alice? although he carried a pair of scissors with him and Oz follows after him, I doubt this pair and the one found near her dead body is the same. def a blind. but I won't leave it out of the options that Vincent did kill Alice)

something else I noticed during that mindscape of Sablier Tragedy is that Oz knows how to get to Alice. he knows the place that was destroyed 100 years ago. idk what to make of this but interesting. this means he must have been alive at that time (Jack Vessalius reincarnation route or something else?)

4] I thought Gil's fear of cats was played for the sake of gags but if it makes him freeze up in a fight against a humanoid looking cat--Cheshire, then it's a serious matter.

5] Cheshire might try to kill everyone in his territory but I am still gonna love him bc he is the cutest cat with the cutest bell that goes ring ring (even if it's for a little while, he made Alice smile while she was alive, look at him snuggled up in her arms)

plus I don't believe Break's words that the Cat is a ‘fanatical follower of the Will’ (Rt:15) and since the Will hates Alice, Cheshire must hate Alice too. I doubt Cheshire would want to kill Alice in any form. he is very loyal to her that even 100 years after her death, he is still here trying to protect the fragment of memory in his bell. he is still trying, in his own little catlike ways, to protect Alice from getting hurt from her painful memories and I just </3 </3

5] Sometime in the past, the Will of the Abyss plucked out Break's left eye and gave it to Cheshire. Why? plus again to my question: what exactly is the Will of the Abyss? What is its connection to Cheshire, Alice and Break? Why does the Will hate Alice? What does the Will want with Oz? and so on

6] Also interesting that here, it’s the Mad Hatter that takes Alice to the mad tea-party conducted by Cheshire Cat

whereas in the original story, it was Cheshire Cat that sent Alice the Mad Hatter’s way. Mad Hatter was not at all gracious to Alice during the mad tea-party lol

Talking of that, Break’s chain seems like some sort of nullification ability (Rt. 20)

aaannd.... Break wonders if the power of the B-Rabbit and that of the Mad Hatter is the same? Break vs Alice soon? But Break's body can't take much of his Chain's power so he will be the first to lose anw

7] Oz feels so strongly for Alice that he singlehandedly started to pull down Cheshire's dimension. In a way, both Oz and Cheshire are the same. they want to protect Alice by destroying everything that hurts her. Cheshire was even ready to go up against the Mad Hatter, against which he stood no chance, just to protect her.

8] Jack Vessalius..... is an enigma. He is hailed as a hero of Sablier, and he, along with the Four Dukedoms, put a stop to the reign of terror under the Baskervilles and saved the country from sinking completely into the Abyss and so on.,..

what I am more curious about is that he appears a lot in Alice's memories and her (the human one, not the chain) reactions to him vary from being highly pleased to be in presence to eagerly waiting for him to downright wanting to kill him. Is she mistaking Oz for Jack? Even Gil mistook Jack for Oz for the same shining golden hair, emerald green eyes. (Rt.17) But Jack was quite affectionate to her in those memories, patting her head and lightly scolding her (Rt.8), then why would she want to kill him? What is their relationship? do I want to know

9] after his speech via Oz's lips, the Pandora officials now believe that Oz is Jack's reincarnation after completing his 100 year cycle. means more burden for Oz to not only maintain the Vessalius House but also the image of Jack.

10] anddd I dunno how to feel about Jack's constant possession of Oz's body. It’s already happened three times now (Rt. 11, Rt.18, Rt. 21) Oz being a hundred year reincarnation of the hero is a bit iffy and cliche but ok, but to be able to ‘possess’ (for the lack of a better word) him every time something arises... if Oz is gonna be under the shadow of the celebrated Jack Vessalius all the time, he won’t have any character development for himself. Oz might try to rely more on Jack than becoming stronger by himself. (two souls possessing one body is only interesting and chaotic when they have opposing interests like Sukuna/Yuuji or Greed/Ling etc.)

11] Baskervilles are even more mysterious. What's their deal? Why do they want the Will of the Abyss? Why did they sink the capital city into the Abyss? Were they trying to make Chains out of the humans by forcing them into the Abyss? and why to massacre everyone? to make crests of blood, FMA-style? After the Tragedy, the remnants of the Baskervilles went into hiding and only came out now with Oz coming of age. According to Jack, they are preparing for a comeback by their master Glen who isn't actually dead apparently. ofc everything starts when our protagonist hits 15

12] The organization of Pandora is... sketchy to say the least. Among many other reasons, but primarily this (Rt. 9)

The members of Pandora too can make a contract with the otherworldly Chains, but apparently, legal. No Seal, no ticking needle, nothing. They get all the benefits from the Chains without risking their lives, which automatically creates a hierarchy of sorts, a kind of divide between the ‘upper class’ and the commoners who blindly walk into these contracts. 

since I am guessing only the people from the four Dukedoms (Rainsworth and Nightray being two) get to make ‘legal’ contracts

the common people get lured into making contracts with the Chains at the promise of ‘ability to change the past’ and eventually, inevitably, failing (bc let’s be real, there’s no way you can do that by killing a bunch of people and even if you do get to change the past, only a hundred new problems will arise and so I never understand the prospects of doing that re: all of those time traveling movies) 

and sinking into the Abyss or dying at the hands of the Pandora

—and watch over the other households (Rt. 13)

(I think Vincent is easily the most perceptive characters we have met so far. He could understand all the underlying politics among the noble families at the age of what? six? seven?

he agrees that part of their status was because of the four families' role in the Tragedy of Sablier but more because they got their hands on the Door to the Abyss. which is really interesting. because it means that the war (massacre?) from 100 years ago also benefited the 'heroes' in many ways. hmmm. was it simply coincidentally spoils of the war? or... was something else going on?)

well, anw my point is that’s for Chains that have already devoured people. But what about Oz and Alice? Oz hasn’t killed anyone nor has Alice eaten anyone bc (Rt.15)

Oz had no choice. He didn’t have any kind of greedy ambition to change the past, to save his business, save someone etc. etc., he just wanted to get out of the Abyss where he had been cast by the Baskervilles in the first place (which they are at again even after ten years)... and the only choice he had, to escape and escape from the mouths of the other Chains dwelling in the Abyss was to make a contract with the strongest Chain there– B. Rabbit. He is not at fault, he had no idea of Chains or Contracts prior to meeting Chain Alice, he did it in the spur of the moment to save his own life and no ulterior motives. 

My question is: If Pandora does have a means to make legal contracts, why don’t they legalize the one between Alice and Oz? The needle’s already moved by two degrees (Rt. 20) and it won’t be long before he is pulled back into the Abyss, this time into the very depths. 

Unless that’s what Pandora wants. 

I literally don’t trust any of the adults around Oz and Alice (except for Gil. I don’t consider Gil as an adult) because Vincent, one of the top echelons of Pandora, is working with the Baskervilles. I don’t know if it’s just him or there are more working with the Baskervilles. (oh but it isn't like he is actually working with them. He is probably planning to backstab them when the time comes and capture the fifth door from them to get hold of the Will.)

[fencecollapsed]

Okay I have Theories™️ about the shadow creatures.

Nibbly creatures are the souls of those who starved to death or were on the verge of it. They get converted by being devoured.

I think wiggly ones are older, typically. Like they're mostly from the early days of hatchetfield. I think they're the souls of people who come to take. So early settlers - colonizers - of hatchetfield. But also like...maybe people who go wandering to scout the woods to exploit what they find. Lumber venture capitalists or something. Sometimes it's just petty thieves. The one from the camping trip went for the guitar. You mentioned finding lost items in caves. They take. They're drawn to conflicts of possession and ownership. They convert by taking something from you, forcing pursuit, then take ur life.

Blinky creatures are sight based. Maybe they get lured in by something openly visible. One of the others maybe? Kinda like will o the wisps. They draw u deeper and deeper into the woods, following this spectacle of a creature until ur lost and can't see where u came from, blinding u, then converting u. I think the primary mechanism is they take one eye. "I can't see".

Tinky ones are harder, I think. Maybe they target people in a hurry? People who lost track of time, runners maybe, people who are running out of time one way or another. They get chased, almost herded, until time runs out and that tick-tick-ticking bearing down on them is the only thing they hear ever again.

Pokey is different, I think. Pokey likes control. He likes conformity and homogeneity. He doesn't use force so much. He doesn't threaten unless necessary. He will target people that resist his pull extra hard tho. People like Paul. He was pissed in TGWDLM because Paul defied him three times. The nail that stands out brings the hammer down first. He lures people away from groups, their packs. I think he goes out of his way to target misfits and outcasts. People who feel like they don't belong. Who struggle with being lonely. He sings, his pack sings, and calls out to them. He lures them with the promise of contentment and belonging. The masks are two fold, I think. They're the shattered remains of the person they were, the barest glimpse that they were something else. But they're almost another manipulation tactic too. I think for the people who get close enough to see them and the pack that's already converted, it implies that their true self is the mask and pokey is the answer to who they really are. Tbh I think more about pokey than I do any of the others, wiggly is a close second tho.

Webby's are sadder to me. I don't think webby is malicious. Maybe misguided and a bit manipulative, but I don't think she means to hurt anyone. When she converts hers, i think she does it to be kind. That it's too late for them and if she doesn't, something else will. Everything so far indicates that they're children. Lost kids. Kids who are scared and trapped. Maybe being cornered by one of the others. They're shaped like rabbits and rabbits are not built to fight. They're built to run away. They're skittish and quick. That fits with scared kids to me, kids running away from the monsters in the dark, the ones that can't find their parents. I think they make webby sad. I think she cares for them, but I think it hurts her to think of them. That she couldn't do more. That their last moments were being frightened and alone. I think their last words hurt her the most. There was only one I think that seemed to have anything even remotely positive said as their last words. But most just echo the saddest, loneliest, most frightened things because that's what their last moments were. And I think that's why they're mostly quiet. I kinda wonder if webby makes them that way on purpose. Quiet so she doesn't have to confront what they say.

Anyways sorry bout the wall of text I love ur story and I am fixated so hard ❤️

I COMPLETELY missed this ask somehow I'm so sorry!!

I love these theories, you're on the right track at a lot of points ;) thank you for sharing!! these are great

[mushramoo]

I know this doesn't really add up with the post but I thought about his for a while.. Scott commissioned someone to voice act a role " A kid with no bad intentions ". And if we jump back a bit, a while a go there was this tall puppet like lady called Eleanor who stole a girls indenty. ( from the fazbear frights of course but since well in a trailer we could see theodore - charlies rabbit toy, we could assume that some of the book characters will also make an appearance. ) plus if Gregory was lured to stay in the pizza plex over time there had to be a good reason. Maybe Eleanor was not only a the kids that could have befriend Gregory and incuraged him to stay ( per say he was challenge or something like " I bet you can't stay the whole day in this pizza plex " Ex. ) and plus maybe she could have also been Vanny? It would explain the robotic voice but that could also be the possession of Glitch trap and what not. But regardless feel free to ignore! I just thought it be inresting because a lot people say that it could have been the security lady but I had something different in mind.. But regardless thank you for reading! I'm sorry if it's confusing but it's just a fun little theory I and and wanted to share! Keep making art and heck- thank you for the days! - and yes it me again :') 🐶💞

I feel like a lot of people say they’re the same person because they both have V names but tbh I don’t think any villain would be dumb enough to make their villain name start with the same letter as their real name lmao. And yes, even tho Scott confirmed they aren’t the same universe I definitely see some parallels between the books and the games so I honestly wouldn’t be surprised to see Eleanor, or to find out Gregory was one of Afton’s kids. All in all, good theory.

[enbyleighlines]

Some miscellaneous thoughts about my modern cultivation au (wherein Meng Yao is a disciple of Yunmeng Jiang and becomes frienemies with Wei Wuxian):

Things are often weird between Meng Yao and Jin Zixuan, because they both know that they’re half-brothers, but Meng Yao made a vow to never talk about it, and Jin Zixuan is super socially awkward. That being said, Jin Zixuan tries his best to act like a big brother despite 1. Never verbally acknowledging that they are brothers, and 2. Not having a single clue about what older brothers are supposed to act like

Mo Xuanyu also becomes a disciple of Yunmeng Jiang at a young age, after his mother hears of Meng Yao’s success. Madam Yu complains that their sect is slowly becoming an orphanage for Jin Guangshan bastards. Mo Xuanyu still follows Meng Yao around like a lost puppy, but Wei Wuxian is the one who dotes on him as though he’s Mo Xuanyu’s older brother

Lan Wangji still has his two rabbits. This time, however, he trains them to become spiritual companions, like Jin Ling’s spiritual dog Fairy. Their names are Yin and Yang and they help lure enemies away from civilians and into the range of Lan Wangji’s sword and guqin. Lan Wangji maintains that they are not pets, so he is not breaking any rules. Lan Qiren begs to differ, but he is outnumbered by Lan Xichen and Qingheng-jun, as well as the numerous junior disciples who practically worship Yin and Yang

Cultivators are basically akin to celebrities in the eyes of the general public. Wei Wuxian never misses an opportunity to flirt with any flustered mundane girl he comes across, to Lan Wangji’s never-ending frustration. This often includes Wei Wuxian showing the girls skateboarding tricks that he can do on his sword

Both Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng know that Meng Yao has a crush on Lan Xichen, so they assume that he’s gay (instead of bi, because they don’t realize bisexuality is a thing, even tho Wei Wuxian IS bisexual). Because of this, they’re always turning to Meng Yao to gently interrogate young women, because they’ve seen too many tv shows and movies where women spill all their secrets to their sassy gay friend. Meng Yao doesn’t bother to correct them because it means that he gets to spend time with Jiang Yanli without the two brothers constantly badgering him about his “intentions”. Meng Yao sometimes needs a big sister, too, okay?

Speaking of Jiang Yanli, she absolutely also decides that Mo Xuanyu is now her younger brother, too. She keeps collecting new baby brothers like it’s going out of style, and no, she will not stop, thank you

[dakotafinely]

Can I get some headcannons of the mud dogs having a s/o that got bit by a oozequitoes turning into a cute animal like a rabbit or deer?Like they're like "it's bad that you got bit from one but you're even cuter now not that you were as a human."something like that.

Oh mi gosh!! Yas!!!

Also, I think I've seen @bootyyy-shaker9000 answer a question similar to this one! (They only did Leonard tho but still) So you could go check them out if you haven't already!

Also, this gets super long so-

Loathsome:

Word spreads fast about stuff like mutants in the Hidden City

Especially since a lot of them move down there with no place else to go

So needless to say anytime you went topside, he was worried

He'd overheard a mutant talking about their transformation and how painful it was and he-

He couldn't bear to know you'd gone through that

Even months after the whole oozesquito thing died down he still tried to be catious for you

You went on a hiking trip with some friends, they'd been begging you for months to come and you finally broke down and gave in

Leonard reminded you five times to pack bug spray

Whats the one thing you'd forgotten to take with you? Bug spray

Who cares anyways, you swear most of the time it doesn't even work for you.

You had a lot of fun on your trip, saw a large flock if birds fly right past you and even got a deer to let you come close enough to touch and pet it.

You got as many pictures as possible to show Leonard tomorrow

And as you were capturing a beautiful sunset picture, thats when it struck.

You felt like you were being stabbed by a thousand needles. Then it began to feel as though you dropped into a mixture of lemon juice and salt.

The pain was so bad your body passed out as a reflex

When you awoke is when you heard shouting.

"There! There it is!" Your friend shouted, as blinding lights began to block your vision. You began backing up, lightly bumping into the tree begind you

"Monster!" Another friend gasped in surprise. Looking dead at you.

Monster? What monster?

You try to turn your head to look around only for it to be caught in branchs

More specifically your antlers were caught in branchs

Oh... oh no

You run off, followed by the shouts of your friends. You eventually out run them and make it to your apartment.

You pass out again on your bed hoping it was just the weirdest dream you'd ever have. Only to wake up and realize it wasn't.

You were staring at yourself in the mirror, staring at the dark brown fur that covered your body. And your newly found antlers, that actually only leveled about five inches above your head, the way they twirled and sat made it look like some kind of surreal crown on you.

But you couldn't focus on anything other than the fact that

Loathsome was gonna kill you

Or at least thats what you thought.

A week passed with no contact from you. It worried Loathsome to his core

Heck, even on weeks whete you became unexpectedly busy you'd at least give him a text briefing him on whats going on.

But nothing, just radio silence.

Finally, he'd gained the nerve to break into your apartment (again)

He called out for you, slowly making his way toward your room.

When he'd tried to open it only to have you shut as quickly as possible he was partially relieved

You weren't dead oh thank anything above!!

But then came the next problem, you were actively avoiding him

"Babe?" He called out "Whats wrong?"

"Nothing!" You shouted, cementing yourself as the worst lair Loathsomes ever known

A beat of silence goes by before you sigh

"Okay, just... don't be mad."

"Mad? Why would I- oh"

Your ears twitched a bit as you waited for him to respond. Him staring at you liked he'd never seen you before.

"Im sorry!" You finally blurt out "I know you said to be catious and to take bug spray and then I forgot and-"

"(Y/N), I'm not mad."

"Your... your not?"

"No, why would I be? I'm glad your okay, and... you look extremely cute as a deer babe."

With that, you tackled him down with kisses

Dastardly:

Yeah, sure he’s heard about mutants, even met a few! But he doesn’t think it’s that big of deal

I mean, it’s been a solid while since that was even happening so you should be all good right?

Plus you’re a photographer so it’s not like you’re not already outside a lot if you were meant to get bitten by now it would’ve happened right?

You were doing a pregnancy photo shoot. A lovely lesbian couple heard of you through a mutual friend and asked for your help.

You had done it outside in a large open space with many wild flowers and surprisingly wild animals to help make the lucky ladies look magical

Heck when you guys were meant to be taking a lunch break a small group of rabbit’s came up  and surrounded the pregnant one. Once you had a picture you lured one over with a piece of your sandwich and got in a pet before the small pack ran off

As you were packing up, the couple having already left with your assurance you’d be alright on your own, it happened.

Bit right as another rabbit came up to sniff if you had more food on you. You let out a large screech in the empty field. You hunched over to find a way to dull the pain.

You don’t pass out until you look at your own hands as they grow a brown and white marble mix of hair.

You woke up in the evening and immediately opened the camera on your phone

Yup, that was you, with long rabbit ears and brown and white fur covering you whole

What else could you but run over to your boyfriends? Not like anyone topside wouldn’t scream at the sight of mutant rabbit

You call him, telling him you’re heading over and that something happened

Without explanation btw, you basically gave the boy a heart attack

So needless to say when he just finds out that you’ve turned into a mutant- and a cute bunny no less -was probably one of the better outcomes he could’ve hoped for with a call like that

“Toots, I get it, and I’m sorry that this has happened. But at least you got lucky but turning into a cute rabbit.”

“That’s not the... I’m cute?”

Malicious:

Venison Jerky, of the Muntjac variety

A childhood delight of your friends and something you’d become obsessed with ever since they introduced it to you

You were heading over to Mickey to share some with him after you two had been talking about the weirdest things you’ve ever tried (He beat you by a long shot but that’s aside from the point)

You’d been swatting away flies the whole way over, you’re not sure why as the bag of venison was sealed tightly and the jerky didn’t even smell bad

You’d swatted away the oozesquito several times before it could actually get a bite on you.

Transforming you into a Muntjac of course

You stumbled in the alley way from the unexpected pain, knocking over a couple of trash cans as your vision blurred due to the pain

Mickey was coming through the portal, something he’d begun to do after you’d been chased by some no-named losers who didn’t know what “no” means

An watching you hold your head and stumble around was not something he was expecting

Same with watching light brown fur cover your body and small horns grow on your head.

Catching you as you pass out from the pain he quickly takes you to a yokai hospital

He’s actually quiet worried, mainly because that’s the freakiest thing his seen in a while. And you looked kinda like you were dying

So when you wake up seemingly fine (aside of from being mutated) he’s relieved beyond all belief

However it was not a relief for you when you realized what you’d become

Not that you didn’t like yokai’s, just that you never expected to be one

“Think about it this way (Y/N)! Now we can spend even more time together!”

“I suppose that’s a fair point, but I’m still mutated Mickey!”

“Aw! But I think you look extra cute this way!”

That gets a giggle out of you, and he grins wide

Heya! Sorry this took so long to get out! Ya know, life and stuff. But I hope ya’ll like it!!

[phoenixyfriend]

I am seized by a fatal need for courtroom ninja drama fic

But not serious courtroom drama. I'm talking Phoenix Wright style Nonsense.

(Some of this was provided by the folks over in @sloaners​‘ server, but the bulk of it was me spitballing nonsense at people who actually know the games, which I do not. I do paraphrase a few times to make it more feasible as a tumblr post/fic concept, rather than a rapidfire text conversation.)

Or one of those like. Reality TV paternity test things? But specifically in my mind the people involved in the actual paternity are a married couple and someone that joined them to be their third, and Clan Elders are throwing a fit about how the baby might not be the heir by blood! while the actual parents are like "I could not care less, this is our child, all three of us, please stop getting involved."

HashiMitoMada would be a VERY good option for the paternity nonsense, mostly because I can see Madara screeching at his own elders about how he already said Izuna would be his heir and he's not changing his mind!

Tobirama is just begging the paternity test to work faster off-screen because he's the only person with the machines to make it happen.

(Hashirama is just. Moping in a corner.)

"I just had to INVENT a paternity test that works before the birth! I had to figure out how to test amniotic fluid! If you assholes make me do something this stupid on such short notice again, I will be digging some shallow graves!" "...for who?" "I haven't decided yet."

Anyway, jumping back to like a Phoenix Wright-style murder investigation.

The victim was Danzo. Even the prosecution isn't actually that interested in making sure someone gets arrested, but they're legally obligated to do at least try. A bunch of people all acting really suspicious about who killed him. There is at least one shitty fake mustache-on-glasses disguise to provide a paper-thin alibi.

WAIT The other thing this gives us is ninjas in three-piece-suits but half of them wear the suits wrong. I’m talking mismatched buttons. The wrong way of tying their tie. Sewn-on-cufflinks. This is Naruto, for instance.

Tobirama would wear it properly, except he's rushing about in a lab coat, screaming at everyone to get out of his way because he's The Entire Forensics Team.

(This is the part where I have to confess that I have only seen the live-action movie of Phoenix Wright, as I don't game, so I just have the live action and tumblr osmosis.)

At this point, of course, we gotta ask: Who is the most Belligerent Witness And who is the Helpful™️ Witness that's super enthusiastic but entirely useless

I can see, say, Mito being a solid witness that both defense and prosecution are really thankful for.

Modern gen you have like... Sasuke and Neji are both incredibly belligerent witnesses. Neji at least is polite about it but pulls the "only answers with the absolute minimum of information."

Lee and Gai would have the over enthusiasm but forget to say actual vital testimony until pressed, and Naruto would love to help but might not be entirely sure what the case even is.

Shikamaru falls asleep when the lawyers consult their partners. Prosecution A consults Prosecution B for thirty-seven seconds, then turns around and the witness is asleep at the stand.

Tobi (as in Obito with mask) is an incredibly frustrating witness. They have to declare a recess just so all the lawyers can recover their blood pressure. "Can we please get someone up on the stand with this guy as a handler? I'm--I'm going to explode."

Gaara: Helpful. Polite. Answers with detail. Answers the spirit of the question as well as the letter. Includes more detail. That's too much detail. Gaara please stop telling us about the sounds that bones make.

His testimony just drags on forever.

Ninken can and will take the stand! Pakkun even enjoys it! Some ninken require translators.

ABURAME TRANSLATING FOR A RANDOM GIANT CENTIPEDE THAT WITNESSED A MURDER IN THE FOREST OF DEATH

There are arguments about whether or not the testimony can count since nobody else can confirm the translation except Other Aburame so how do they know the Aburame aren't part of the coverup.

"Okay, so this Danzo guy had like fifty shell companies but I think I found the route that leads back to him?" "Nah, that one goes to a guy that died eighty years ago that's still collecting pensions: his family lied and said he was still alive for the money." "Fuck!"

Also I just. I love the idea of Sasuke and Madara being the exact opposite kind of belligerent witness.

Also, Orochimaru answers with pretty much the exact kind of wording as Gaara, but where Gaara is trying to be helpful and provide detail for the sake of the case, and failing to see that it's maybe not necessary, Orochimaru just wants to see people squirm. ...similar thing happens with Sakura and Kabuto. Similar phrasing, very different energy.

I keep picturing all of Team Taka as part of Forensics and Evidence Collecting ajshakshjd

Juugo, holding up a rabbit: I found a witness.

Karin joins forensics and Tobirama nearly weeps from joy until he finds her criminal record "Shit, that was supposed to get thrown out when I turned eighteen."

Tobirama: I asked for an assistant, not a criminal. Karin: I'm on parole. Tobirama: That makes things worse. Karin: I know how to use a [concerningly advanced machine that I, a business major, cannot name]. Tobirama: ...never mind, I'm keeping you.

Karin: I know how to DNA sequence AND use LA-ICP-MS Tobirama: [weeps with joy]

Suigetsu would be great at blood splatter analysis. ...I think I read somewhere that blood spatter analysis is actually over in 'fake science that's pushed by cops and media but actually doesn't work' BUT apparently it’s in the Ace Attorney games so we’re going to ignore reality a bit. We’ve already got dogs and rabbits and centipedes as witnesses, what’s a bit of blood spatter?

He's also probably really good at cause of death stuff? Like looking at corpse and figuring out how long it took the victim to die, which blow did it, whether any damage was inflicted post-mortem, etc.

Sasuke is usually too busy playing Belligerent Witness but sometimes goes to join Taka for... uh... reasons.

Juugo: [takes the stand] Lawyer: Hey, uh, why's that Uchiha guy with him? The witness-- Judge: No, no, we need Uchiha Sasuke on hand when questioning Expert Animal Handler Juugo. Lawyer: ...why? Judge: Property damage.

(Sasuke as a work partner with Juugo, also moonlighting as a witness/suspect in Danzo's murder.)

One time they need Juugo but can't find him even though court is already in session and he said he'd be here, turns out he was lured away by Kakashi's army of dogs. Kakashi didn't notice until he turned to ask Pakkun if he could help find the missing expert.

Juugo is a decent lab assistant, I think?

Anyway.

Tobirama taking on Team Taka as his forensics team while Orochimaru is... hm... traveling the country to promote his new autobiography, which is outselling the newest Icha Icha to Jiraiya's ire.

Sloane suggested “a case where it's all the Sannin as suspects in a murder. They would be THE WORST, say... the murder of Hanzo.”

To which I suggested “The Sannin are all suspects but the people on trial are the Ame trio, maybe?”

Which garnered the response of “It could be a surprise upset IN COURT that the trio should be on trial.”

We love a court upset.

Suigetsu finds out that the cause of death was actually an entirely natural heart attack, but while he was determining this, the rest of the team and the lawyers found like eight conspiracies by Zetsu, three by Danzo, four by Orochimaru, and an entire network of nonsense by Sasori.

INO IS THE PSYCHIC. I know her thing in canon is reading minds but pls. Ino is Maya. The Spirit Medium.

Is the judge: 1. Hiruzen 2. Hashirama 3. Hagoromo 4. Mifune 5. The Daimyou

(Old dude with authority, optionally easily distracted/questionably competent. I'd have gone for impressive facial hair but only Mifune and Hagoromo have more than like... Hiruzen's weird soul patch.)

It's not a soul patch but I don't know what facial hair is called and I can't just call it a goat beard

Response commentary was as follows: The Daimyou would unfortunately be closer to the personality of the ace attorney judge, more blindly agreeing with things that sound good :joy: Hiruzen could be fun if only for the competing facial hair for a beard, yes xD Hagoromo would possibly be most buckwild tho WELCOME TO MOON COURT

I managed to get this far with like... NO idea who the judges were except “IDK maybe Kakashi?” but consider:

...HashiMada rival lawyers

Dropping over to Izuna vs. Touka for when Hashirama and Madara inevitably become suspects of something or other themselves and have to be witnesses.

(Tobirama's too busy running blood tests, Anija, let Touka handle it, she's better at people anyway.)

...Hashirama is like. Marginally more put-together than Madara, right? So that... makes him Edgeworth... somehow... That feels wrong but Madara as Edgeworth feels even more wrong.

Madara is very into screaming OBJECTION

ALSO consider: Friction when a doctor from a nearby hospital gets called in to provide expert testimony on something because Karin is like "no hey I should be the one doing this" and then she sees how cute Sakura is.

But also at some point Kakashi vs. Gai for a nonsense case. Their personalities are both VERY FUN for this sort of thing.

[ex0rin]

thoughts on mobius and zemo interacting tho

Okay so I feel like I might start a riot with this but:

There are a bunch of factors here - like when did Zemo veer off of the path that the Time Keepers had set for him? If it's anytime after Sokovia then I feel like Mobius would call that boy out on his shit - like, I get it Zemo, you were feeling pretty torn up about your family dying but with all of that Baron money you probably could have put more time and energy into helping rebuild the state than running off to pit the Avengers against each other...

In my heart I know that this ask is trying to lure me into a Zemo/Mobius arc (which I very much appreciate) but it's hard for me to balance my love for Zemo as a villain in CA:TWS and TFATWS with the things that Mobius would absolutely have seen about him.

Revenge over easing the suffering of his people? Especially after he'd spent so much time fighting to protect them? Mobius would be unimpressed tbh.

Mobius with Loki I get because Loki's tale is a sad story about a man who's one role in this universe is to better the people around him by failing time and time again, but Zemo? He could have bettered his country but he chose revenge and that's hard for me to get behind (reminder: I love Zemo, I appreciate his tragic backstory BUT Mobius is privy to his entire life and all of the possibilities therein and I just don't think he would have the same sympathy)

As an additional aside, I think that there must be Zemo Variants who have made other choices, who are good or try harder to be good but I don't know what his overarching character design is.

The Loki Series specifically tells us that Loki's one job in the multiverse is to suffer so that others can achieve their true potential - if that's the case, then what is Zemo's job? Is it only to force a rift into the Avengers? Is that the only way that they can defeat Thanos??? The possibilities are exhausting...

This is a rabbit hole that could spiral forever.

Please note that I'm open to different takes on this, it's just how I'm feeling atm. It's a really good question.

[minnesotamedic186]

So yeah I made these Special Strike/Rebellion OCs and BEFORE you judge me TheHottestDog and I don't really have that many different ideas. You see, the HotBoi himself had a Special Strike 3 planned, with Glitchtrap and his henchrabbits and MORE henchrabbits coming back, and I actually came up with that lady on the left BEFORE I knew this fact, so at least that works. As for the guy on the left, I was always interested in the Shadowdroids' stories and that only amplified with TheHottestDog's "The Pit" music video. To get more info tho, I'm gonna have to explain these twos' stories:

Alexandrite, AKA Shadowdroid #67, is the same #67 that quote, "Found his way to Android Heaven" in the Pit music video. Only instead of you know, DYING and literally finding himself in Android Heaven, he actually found his way to a good DeviantArt friend of mine, ACmetalman, who decided to patch him up. Now #67 calls himself Alexandrite, after the fact that his eyes change colors depending on what he's feeling: Pink is for positive emotions, like happiness or love; Blue is for negative emotions, like sadness, anger or fear; And green is for neutral emotions, like confusion, surprise or indifference

As for the hanchrabbit lady (who'salsojustanAUversionofmebutIdigress-)

This is Trojan, formerly known as Queertrap. Her name is based off that thing Disney's doing where they add that one(1) gay or LGBT character in their movies for about 15 seconds to make people think they're being "progressive" only for that character to be easily edited out later. Queertrap's job was to lure in unsuspecting memes to their untimely deletion at the hands of either Glitchtrap or the other henchrabbits, who she saw as her brothers. But once she found out the true extent of what the Rabbits were doing, Queer decided to fight back, though no directly. See, Trojan is supposed to be what Vanny was supposed to be in SS3, but instead of aiding Freddy & his gang against The_Observer and the Rabbits, Trojan went into hiding(in the Gachaverse of all places) with memes she rescued from the 2020 FNAF 2 Night 6 In A Nutshell Remake, as well as change her name to Trojan and leave for good herself before the ending scene of Security Breach True Ending. Like Glitchtrap, Trojan has a weapon of her own, but instead of using it for deleting purposes like Glitchy's Injector, Trojan has something similar to a Controlled Shocker in the form of a fencing sabre, that makes someone, when used, either Default Pose or simply Ragdoll depending on the situation

[phoenix-manga]

NRC!AU Allen Liddel Headcanons:

A 2nd year in Heartslabyul and there’s not much difference from his actual personality.

The only thing that’s different is that Riddle has a migraine now that Allen is stuck with him for the rest of his school life. 

Although he’s a pain in Riddle’s neck, he has an odd talent for brewing tea and making cake sculptures. He and trey are often seen in the kitchen. 

Also does a lot of BiG BrAiN sh*t, once tried to paint the roses red by using a hose attached to a large tank of paint. Where he got the tank from nobody knows but thankfully Cater managed to talk him out of it before he literally paints the dorm red. Riddle meant red roses NOT red everything.

He has Tock wander around the dorm and whenever they hold a tea party, that sneaky hare is always sitting next to him with a cookie jar in his paws.

Meeting the first years:

This was after the overblot incident because Allen is always roaming about but for some reason they can’t seem to find him when they want to find him.

Meeting Ace and Deuce was interesting to say the least, when Yuu was chasing Grimm because Grimm was chasing a white hare obviously Ace and Deuce unintentionally blocked it’s path.

They wondered why a hare would be here, noticing a name tag on it’s collar they assume it’s from one of their upperclassmen from Heartslabyul so they go there to try and return it.

Cater: If it isn’t the first years again~! Hmm? Isn’t that Allen’s pet? Why do you have it?

Deuce: So, you know this ‘Allen’ guy? We came to return this to him...

Grimm: Darn animal stole my biscuit!

Ace: Aren’t you an animal tho?

Grimm: Fnyaa! shut up!

Allen was right around the corner and the hare thrashes about making Deuce lose his grip and it runs off. They run after it only to bump into Allen.

At first, they think he’s just an ordinary student but after overhearing that Riddle has a bit of a problem with Allen they obviously want to know more about this upperclassmen of theirs.

Ace and Allen become prank buddies, always getting into trouble and being a general nuisance. Ace even tags along when Allen uses his unique magic to make a shortcut to the school.

Deuce would tag along too if he wasn’t so slow in getting dressed sometimes.

Allen in Chapter 1:

He plays on the role of the white rabbit who lures “Alice”, in this case, Yuu and the A-Deuce duo. 

He’s just out of the corner of their eye and whenever they follow him, they always bump into someone else. 

Ace and Deuce plan on asking Allen about how to get the collar off when they are lead to Cater who explains about a rule to “return what you stole”. Cater recommends either Trey or Allen since both are good at culinary, though he recommends they talk to Allen first since Trey is the vice-dorm leader and might be too busy.

They spot Allen again and following Cater’s advice they try their best to follow him but bump into Trey who sent them on a fetch quest for chestnuts to make an apology tart.

They follow Allen again but only to encounter Chen’ya instead. 

Chen’ya: You want to know if I saw a student walking by? Purrhaps I have but you can only find him when you stop looking, fufufufu~

Everyone: *Confused af*

They don’t get to talk at all until during the Heartslabyul tea party where Riddle goes off on Ace for bringing a tart. Before they got kicked out, Grimm managed to at least get a hold of a biscuit before Cater and Trey threw them out. 

He was about to eat it until a shadow snatched it. Grimm is frustrated and swears revenge on the fiend who took his biscuit! The others didn’t see Tock since they were busy talking amongst themselves.

It was in the afternoon that Grimm recognizes the hare who stole his treat and he makes a dash for him threatening to burn his hide for stealing his precious biscuit! Yuu chases him afterwards and that’s where they will finally meet and be introduced to Allen.

Allen doesn’t do much in the story except to lead them to the other characters.

[imaginethoseguys]

Dog... not me saying I won't be writing fanfiction anymore, then asking for Haikyuu inspo and then finishing 3 seasons of Bungou Stray Dogs in a week and writing this...... I have no explanations. bye

One Way

Pairing: Dazai Osamu x fem!S/O Word count: 2.7k Warnings: suicide and depression, angst, it ends good tho Summary: After parting, Dazai thought he would never see her again. He convinced himself he wouldn't. But then, a new lead for a case appears, and Dazai feels his entire being shattering to pieces.

When Dazai saw that case for the first time, he didn’t believe it. It was too good to be true. No, it couldn’t possibly be true. After they parted the last time, he never imagined such a chance to present itself to him. But all the evidence said otherwise, so it left him no choice but to believe. His deadly precise logic was in a raging conflict with his emotions, which Dazai never thought would be an issue. Although, lately, everything became too possible for his comfort.

In existential fear of meeting her again, he regretted meeting her at all. Not for the reasons one would assume. Looking back, he should’ve killed himself months, months, and months ago because now that he knew her, he understood how difficult it was going to be. Before, he was eager and ready to end his life. Nothing really held him back, no bonds strong enough to regret leaving them behind. The issue lied not in reflexivity or thinking too much about others. It was in nothing but his own overbearing and absolute selfishness when it came to her. He didn’t want to live to keep her company, he wanted to hold onto his privilege of looking at her, touching her, smelling her hair, kissing her knuckles, feeling her gaze on his face, feeling her fingers in his hair. He was rid of it after they last saw each other, which was ages ago.

Now, this crushing lonely bliss was tumbling down, all because of a file that stared at Dazai from the surface of his desk. Dozens of people dead, Yokohama was on the brink of a cross-organization conflict, and the newly located lead had Dazai completely taken aback. He wasn’t working, of course, to Kunikida’s great annoyance. He was thinking, spiraling into endless rabbit holes, staring at her photo attached to the file. She looked so nice, why did she always look so nice? Well, he knew why, she was elegant and stylish, there was a metaphysical kind of beauty to her, she looked breathtaking no matter what she did. Perhaps, it was his bias talking. She always looked after his appearance back in the Port Mafia days. She fixed his ties, she taught him to buy good-fitted pants and shirts. She wouldn’t shut up about Mori’s coat asking him to please throw this doormat away and get something nice. He figured it probably wasn’t the coat as much as it was her hate for Mori and his nasty pedophilia, it’s so disgusting it’s probably contagious please wash your hands. She cared. It felt nice. She would be happy to know he burnt it. He wondered if she would like his new coat. He bought it trying his best to remember her advice. He wanted to show it to her.

Wanted but couldn’t, there was no way. There were rumours about her death a few years ago among the Port Mafia crowd, but Dazai called bullshit on it right away. She knew better and she did better than just dying somewhere. Staring at her photo that was clearly taken here, in Yokohama, he couldn’t understand. Why was she here? Why was she involved? She had no reason to be. She wanted to get away, there was nothing she wanted more. After Oda died, they both decided to leave Port Mafia. But Dazai intended to stay in Yokohama and she wished to leave without looking back. Mutual loss drove them apart, they both weren’t mentally ready to find compromises. So she left. And he stayed. And now there was this photo of her, shamelessly lying in the file and destroying the elaborate image of a life he has built for himself. He stated at it for another minute or two. There was one reason for her to be back, Dazai was deliberately avoiding even considering this reason because everything inside him screamed how unrealistic and stupid this reason was.

Still, he had to suppress his inner turmoil because no matter what he thought, rationally, there was only one way to find out. Uttering a quiet ‘I see how it is,’ he got up and started walking towards the exit. Kunikida was quick to stop him.

“Where do you think you’re going, Dazai?”

“Weren’t you the one who gave me the file? I’m off to work, of course.”

“Don’t say ‘of course’ like it’s something ordinary, idiot.”

Kunikida eyed Dazai’s face and fell silent for a moment.

“Do you want me to come with you?” He asked, calmer and noticeably more serious. Dazai looked back at him, eyes half-closed, giving him a moment of silence in return before breaking into another exaggerated smile.

“No thank you, I don’t want you ruining my disguise plan, Kunikida.”

Kunikida started yelling again, but Dazai paid it little attention since he was already out of the door.

One way, he thought repeatedly, as if to burn the phrase into his mind. ___ The building Dazai found himself in was no coincidence or convenience. Universe was speaking to him, furiously punching the obvious into the back of his head as he dodged and ignored the impact. The old abandoned church was the place where he found her after a failed attack mission. She wasn’t a stranger to murder, and she was prepared to face death of her associates as well as her own, but it was her first mission in command and a first horrifying defeat, which she did not take lightly. He found her hysterical, sobbing and holding onto her arms so hard it bruised, fingers almost piercing through fabric and skin. Never in his life has Dazai ached for someone else’s pain as much as he ached for hers. He couldn’t bring himself to say something usually harsh, like stop pitying yourself or get over yourself and get your shit together. Instead, he grabbed her and pressed her trembling body into his own, hugging her so hard she could barely breath anymore. He wanted to squeeze all the anguish out of her and absorb it. It wasn’t a problem, he dealt with worse, he could take it, so please let him so she doesn’t have to. His head pulsated in despair, at a loss of what to say and what to do. So he kissed her, so hard their teeth collided. He kissed her and kissed her, until she couldn’t think. He wanted to distract her, to leave her head an empty space, to leave her no chance to reflect, remember, or blame herself. No chance to feel anything.

Looking back, Dazai wouldn’t call it the healthiest way to comfort someone in distress, but it kind of worked, so who’s to judge. He walked up to the altar, allowing the nostalgia to take over his senses for a little while. He always found it funny: they made their secret meeting place a church, yet nothing they did here was close to holy. Nothing they ever did in their lives was holy. A murder 9 to 5 takes a pretty big toll on your mind and soul so having someone in your orbit who relieved your sense of existential dread and sometimes made you forget you’re dead inside helped. This is why Dazai wanted so badly for this lead to be a dead end. He was doing such a nice job of having his shit together and seeing her meant all of it would go to hell. One could say he was being too harsh on himself, but these were facts: as an analytic, Dazai knew himself in and out, and he acknowledged that his feelings for her, which was arguably his most irrational part of being, were a threat to his work performance, moral compass, and strive for the sweet embrace of death. It had to be fake. Then, he would come back to the agency, and she would be gone, and he would be able to solve the case like 2+2 and move on. Then, he would commit suicide, perhaps with some lovely lady, in some poetic and melancholic way, letting the black hole in his chest ascend into space and settle somewhere in its infinity. And all would be well. If this lead was a fake. If it’s a fake. If it’s—

“Fancy meeting you here.”

A second, and Dazai can swear he hears the sounds of glass breaking all around him. Everything is vacuum, the following silence is deafeningly loud in his ears. His body aches and his chest feels tight and prickly. He can’t find it in himself to breathe.

“You know, I wasn’t even sure this place would still be here, but I sacrificed logistics for the sake of a romantic sentiment.”

Her heels tapped against the old wooden floor as he felt her get closer to him.

“I guess great minds think alike,” Dazai said without turning around. There was silence again. He could feel her soft (he knew it as) gaze on his back. His fingers trembled.

“What do you have to do with this whole thing? You’re a primary suspect. What’s your gain?” Deciding to wait no more, Dazai spoke.

He hears her chuckle.

“Why do you ask me if you already know the answer?”

“I want to hear you say it.”

Don’t say it.

Don’t say it.

Don’t say it.

“I got involved on purpose, of course.”

“Why?”

Say it isn’t so.

“To get to you.”

The hole in his chest shifts, it grows bigger, hungrier, it howls, like a whale on the bottom of an ocean. Even though she has left a long time ago, her ghostly presence lingers inside of him, a little smoldering coal, red sparkle inside a black pit of nothingness. It senses her presence, her scent, the timbre of her voice, and it starts absorbing everything it can reach just to get her closer, to lure her in.

“It was a pretty risky affair, I confess. I’m on a radar right now. I’m surprised no one followed you here, but you’re Dazai, so I shouldn’t be too surprised.”

She waited for his reaction and when nothing followed, continued to talk.

“My leave from Port Mafia was messy. I’m not on good terms with Mori, like you. I’m not on any terms with him except for my ever-burning hatred of that perv. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you anything, but after Odasaku things moved fast, so I had to leave immediately. The only option of me not dying was a one-way ticket. I wasn’t supposed to get involved with anything in Yokohama, otherwise they would be fast on my ass.”

He knew that, he knew all of that, he wasn’t stupid. He understood she was telling him this to fill the silence and not to explain herself. But seeing, or hearing in this case, her alive meant her escape was successful. So why? Why would she come back? To a person who did not follow her. Who did not write her. Dazai did not want her being tracked by anyone, so he kept his distance. But this distance was supposed to drive her away, to separate them. To turn them into strangers.

“So why,” Dazai said out loud, finishing his train of thought. “Why are you here? Why on earth are you here? Are you out of your mind?”

“Probably, “she mused. She was right behind him now.

“Tell me the reason,” Dazai gritted his teeth. It was the only way to stop his entire body from shaking. Just tell him something, anything but not what he wants her to say.

“Because life without you is meaningless and miserable.”

Dazai scoffed. Who is she saying this to?

“I don’t want to live if it’s a life where I never see you again. I’d rather live 5 minutes after seeing your face than god knows how many years with you as a fading memory. I fucking hate your memory; I don’t need it. I need you. I’m not a good person, I don’t deserve chances at life, I’m not gonna use them. I killed a bunch of innocent people in hopes of getting you on the case, you think I care for my life anymore?”

He remained silent. He knew this feeling too well. To live with a bottomless pit for a heart, to meet someone who covered it so nicely to then be rid of that someone? It was better to never cover the pit in the first place. It only hurts more when you know things can be different. Better leave them untouched and let the black hole swallow you, thinking this is how it’s supposed to be.

“Osamu. Look at me.”

He let in a shaky breath. He hasn’t heard his name like this in forever. No one else could say it like her. In no one else’s lips did it sound so soft, so tender, so welcoming.

So loving.

“Please don’t make me turn around,” he said quietly, barely a whisper, voice filled with pity and hurt.

“Why?” she echoed as quietly.

“Because I’ve been doing such a good job ridding my life of any meaning. I’ve convinced myself I won’t be seeing you again and that I’m fine with it. I’m numb. It makes the work so easy, you know? I can execute any plan and not worry about anything. I’ve studied so many ways of suicide. I’ve never been closer to making my wish come true. I can spend a bit more time helping others and then clock out into nihility.”

He felt her forehead softly press against his back. Her long gentle hands went around his waist and locked on his stomach. Her delicate fingers reached to his hollow chest, to the hungry wailing emptiness that was devouring him and cradled it. She took it into her warm benevolent palms and held it carefully, warming it up. Dazai breathed out brokenly, his own hands lingering above hers, hesitant.

“How am I supposed to kill myself after seeing your face?”

He felt her smile.

“I’m sorry. I’m too selfish.”

Her body shifted back slightly, which made Dazai instinctively turn his head to the side.

“Got you.”

With that, she leaned onto him and caught his lips in hers. Check mate. Losing any last bits of control, he spinned around, grabbing her, pressing her body closer to his. He wanted to hold her close, so close, closer than ever before. He wanted to dissolve in her, to become one with her because it seemed to be the only way to never lose her again. Life didn’t need to have meaning, there was no meaning. No meaning, no God, no purpose, no higher power, no morality, no ethics, no good, and no evil. There was only her. He only needed her. Her lips, her scent, her voice. She could be his God, his judgment his atonement, his nationality, his worldview. His sin and confession, his modesty and decadence. His culture and ignorance.

He could feel her own darkness longing, begging for his presence, the way his longed for her. She talked to him through her tongue entwining with his, through her hands clutching his shirt.

I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you

A small and hesitant do you love me? Do you want me?

Dazai smiled helplessly.

Why do you even ask? Of course I love you. I can’t fucking live without you, life is pointless without you in it. I want only you, there is nothing else in this world. It’s only you.

you you you you you you you you

When they break apart, they are both breathless, like they just ran a marathon. He finally opens his eyes and looks at her. It’s a paradox, how she looks so different yet so comfortably same as the last day he saw her. Same glimpse in her eyes when she looks at him. Same soft hands cupping his cheeks. Same breathtaking scent that blurs your mind and vision. It’s her. The pit in his chest is quiet, for the first time in years. The lingering coal is lit up, it’s bright and warm, and the flame is her figure.

She looks him up and down, pleased.

“You got a new coat.”

He grins, pressing his forehead against hers.

“Yeah. Do you like it?”

She closes her eyes again, placing her palm firmly on his chest, sealing the darkness shut.

“I love it.”