writtenbynath

[writtenbynath]

Thank you, Secret. I really respect your point of view in this because yes, I do admire you and the stuff you put out there. You're one of the few who consistently put out good, fun, well-made stuff that's ethical and keeps the well-being of the listeners in mind.

And yes, I appreciate hat it's hard for content creators out there because Patreon and OnlyFans and porn sites don't allow hypnosis for absolutely bullshit reasons that have nothing to do with how dangerous or harmless the files actually are.

I do also agree that some people who consume lots of files need to take accountability for the content they encourage creators to make. I had this conversation with someone recently where I told them "if you break someone, as a top, and I don't care if you're doing it in a file or in person, you have the responsibility to provide the aftercare needed to put them back together again. You can't just break someone and abandon them."

And they said "But people don't want files with long aftercare wake up time." And that's true. The people who want files that really break and destroy them, don't seem to want aftercare with that. These fans have to take accountability for the dangerous shit they ask for. I for one am not willing to put out what they ask for, and I think neither is Secret.

The reason why I wrote this, is because not a lot of people look at it from this angle. Consuming online files is an easily accessible way to do hypnokink when you don't know any people to do it with IRL or when they live far away. It's an easy thing to stumble into without understanding all the risks, and so I wanted to shine a light on those risks. We already understand the danger of meeting people IRL.

What is the most dangerous hypno thing you can do?

Is a question someone asked on Reddit. My answer is a bit of a hot take, but I think it's important to share

I think online files are the most dangerous way to do hypnosis. It's very hard to tell how dangerous a file is going to be before you try it, and you're doing it alone, the creator of the file is unavailable to provide aftercare or help you get back on your feet. On the contrary, many content creators make more money if you buy more of their files, so they encourage a dependency or addiction to their files in their fans. It's very easy to (through peer pressure or because you're a newbie) stumble upon bad stuff and get drawn in without knowing how to keep yourself safe or free yourself from it. The shame of getting yourself caught in this mess because of sexual desire often makes it very hard to seek help.

Yes, I'd say the most dangerous thing in hypnokink is online files.

[writtenbynath]

What is the most dangerous hypno thing you can do?

Is a question someone asked on Reddit. My answer is a bit of a hot take, but I think it's important to share

I think online files are the most dangerous way to do hypnosis. It's very hard to tell how dangerous a file is going to be before you try it, and you're doing it alone, the creator of the file is unavailable to provide aftercare or help you get back on your feet. On the contrary, many content creators make more money if you buy more of their files, so they encourage a dependency or addiction to their files in their fans. It's very easy to (through peer pressure or because you're a newbie) stumble upon bad stuff and get drawn in without knowing how to keep yourself safe or free yourself from it. The shame of getting yourself caught in this mess because of sexual desire often makes it very hard to seek help.

Yes, I'd say the most dangerous thing in hypnokink is online files.

[writtenbynath]

Fanaticism and ignorance

[writtenbynath]

hypnosis is a way of fucking words. hypnosis is a way of having sex with the words. being caressed and touched and penetrated by words. sexual intercourse. with words

[writtenbynath]

[writtenbynath]

[writtenbynath]

[writtenbynath]

It's ok to have rape fantasies/kinks where you're the aggressor.

It's ok to have teacher/student fantasies/kinks where you're the teacher.

It's ok to have power imbalance fantasies/kinks where you're the one with more power.

It's ok to have predator/prey fantasies/kinks where you're the predator.

It's ok to have pain/punishment fantasies/kinks where you're the one inflicting the pain/punishment.

Your fantasies and kinks don't make you a bad person.

Safely exploring your fantasies and kinks through fiction or through role playing (either online or in-person acts) with other consenting adults doesn't make you a bad person.

[writtenbynath]

I know it's dangerous to be visible right now.

🏳️‍⚧️ PROTECT TRANS LIVES 🏳️‍⚧️

[writtenbynath]

I saw your tags

He likes littles. He really likes littles, and I don't think that's because he's a pedo, contrary to what a lot of people say. I think he just likes his girls better when they are cute and obedient and they don't disagree with him on anything ever. He's looking for girls he can easily overpower with no opinions or needs of their own.

It's fucking sick

Nimja

He's back and he hasn't changed. So let me share with you a list that summarises what we know about this predator

🚩His first consent violation in the Dutch kink scene that we know of was over 20 years ago. This is a long established pattern.

🚩He has been known to groom people under 18 years old. One such person reported Nimja to NEEHU because they wouldn't feel safe if he attended.

🚩Both Nimja and the organisers of NEEHU are accountable for the fact that Nimja attended NEEHU online under a pseudonym after he was banned for above reason.

🚩Multiple bans from hypno kink events in the US, UK and internationally

🚩One case of hypnotising a person who did not give consent to be hypnotised. She was traumatised and still gets very angry talking about this, even fifteen years after the event.

🚩One case of a little agreeing to play with him on the condition "nothing sexual" and he proceeded to give her a hypnotic orgasm. This was so traumatic to her, she never wants to be hypnotised again.

🚩Numerous cases of creepy behaviour.

🚩One case of sexual assault at a kink event and numerous consent violations.

🚩Multiple cases of online hypno D/s play that he ended abruptly and without giving proper aftercare, leaving them addicted to files without any recourse. Some of these women flew to the Netherlands to meet him only to be dumped.

🚩Multiple cases of gaslighting his victims into believing he had done nothing wrong and they must be bad people or they must need mental help for reacting this way.

🚩Numerous cases of trying to remove complaints and information about his abuse from online spaces, accusing people of harassing him and badmouthing his victims.

🚩The parasocial relationships he develops with his fans are unhealthy because there is an imbalance in power and he has taken no steps to change that over the years. He still uses predatory tactics to lure in young women who are inexperienced in kink and hypnosis so he can teach (groom) them. He prefers them young or little so they don’t talk back.

Every new girl who becomes his fan is at risk of falling prey to this same abusive behaviour again.

[writtenbynath]

for the people that like to play around, consensually, with the idea that they can't resist their 'tist or dom for specific scenes, do you think you have any advice on safety?

my partner and i like to play with the idea of helplessness, of giving out autonomy over for a bit, but we always agree to it before either of us are in trance. we talk it out like a plan, give eachother outs, we don't try anything unexpected. we're always on the same page, seeing as we're both switches and very like-minded subs.

i've also been thinking about trying to condition myself - and eventually, hopefully, my partner - to feel emotional discomfort more intensely in trance, so that if i do feel it, it breaks my immersion. as an added safety measure, just in case we get really into it and i suddenly lose my mood (not that it's been an issue; my partner and i trust eachother very much, and so far in the 3 or so years we've been actively practicing, nothing ever bad has come of it).

we trust eachother enough to do this, to give proper aftercare and reaffirm that it's simply fantasy or kinkplay. but i have ocd, and i overworry that i may be somehow secretly doing something wrong by approaching my kink this way with my partner, or that i'm feeding my partner the wrong idea about how to treat me in trance. i know this is a very context-dependent question, but i just don't want to do anything wrong. i'd never want to hurt him and i'd never want to lead him into accidentally hurting me.

I think your approach to this is really thoughtful. It's good to recognise that you're prone to worrying too much about things that are probably going to be fine, that helps you dismiss the worries. Because between two loving, trusting partners who are considerate about each other's limits and boundaries, the sky is the limit. Certainly, everyone makes mistakes, but mistakes can be corrected as soon as both parties know something is up. Communication is everything and it sounds like you two have that down.

I also have partners who really love revelling in the helplessness and losing control aspect of hypnokink and that's safe for us to do, because they know they have excellent subject agency to let me know something doesn't feel right, or to just wake themselves up when they need to, and I know don't actually want to take any control away from them. I just want them to have a wonderful experience in my arms, and then provide the aftercare needed to return to real life. And in that real life I want to be a partner who generally makes that real life better. And they do the same for me. It's schmoopy but it's true.

The control and the hypno and the pleasure and the fear play and the helplessness are profound experiences that nourish us in ways I can hardly comprehend, and things can go wrong in those moments. That's the reality of life. But if we love and support each other irl and communicate about our needs, we can do anything together. We're building each other up. That's the most important part of any relationship, the support and holding space for each other to grow.

[writtenbynath]

Sharing with others makes us feel better

My Desire

As someone who grew up at a time where there was no online—no video, no gifs, no public internet of any kind—I was convinced that no one else in the entire world could possibly entertain the feelings and fantasies that I had of hypnosis.

I would think of a woman alone in a room, trying to escape. While her needs were provided for, it was impossible to overcome the challenges of the hypnotic maze that had been created for her. Imagine... a monitor constantly displaying spirals... a speaker randomly broadcasting a relentless metronome beat. Subliminal messages and images. All designed to captivate and fascinate. And when exhaustion inevitably overcame her, in sleep she would helplessly succumb to the constant brainwashing and programming.

Concocting these scenarios in isolation at that formative age truly made me feel there was something wrong with me. At that point I could never imagine getting to experience some of the things I would eventually experience in an internet-connected world. I've learned that my dark side is real... but the chance to share it with others, honestly and openly, is what I value.

Here's to all of you realizing and treasuring your desires.

[writtenbynath]

Are there any hypno subjects that you don’t know much about, but hope to follow a workshop/class/lecture on or read more about at some point?

I definitely wish I could listen to Sleepingirl talk about Erickson for hours and hours on end. And if SexObsessedLesbian is teaching, I would love to watch. Are there specific hypno subjects I want to learn more about? I would love to ironically watch NLP and pickup artistry classes. And stuff about conversational hypnosis, but I don't expect to learn anything new there.

[writtenbynath]

I realise that the person who asked this question was actually coming from a place of disbelieving the story of a woman who was hypnotised even though she didn't give consent to be hypnotised. And to that sentiment I just want to say:

Believe victims

How exactly do you hypnotise someone nonconsentually? Given the basically universal agreement outside of people who get off on it that that isn't possible.

So, I've already written about that extensively. Lots of people get abused, lots of people get manipulated, forced to do things they don't want, no hypnosis required for that. Not only that, lots of people get into a situation they didn't consent to because they didn't understand what was happening and/or where it would lead.

Here's some links to posts I wrote previously on the subject of hypnosis making people do things they don't want:

Can a hypnotist make you do things you don't want?

They must have wanted it

[writtenbynath]

This anonymous question I received, deserves a whole writing to answer. Because it's just too simplistic to believe that hypnosis only works when you cooperate.

People who are ill-informed about how hypnosis works on the mind seem to think that a hypnotist can just progam and reprogram someone's mind. And when I write about the empowerment of bottoms, I explain that there are subjects who can easily resist or adjust suggestions. I believe everyone can learn to do that. Well, then... "They must have wanted it" is the mantra of lazy hypnotists who simply don't care enough to think about the nuances of social pressure, coercion and seduction.

The way hypnosis works is that a hypnotist tells the subject what they should do, with the use of hypnotic techniques, and the subject executes those commands to the best of their abilities. So how can anyone get hypnotised against their will? Hypnosis requires their cooperation, right? I've written about this before

Our body complies with the stimuli it is given, that does not imply that the stimulus is wanted or enjoyed.

And the solution is very simple. Listen to their words, not their body. Do not dismiss their words because their body "is giving you mixed signals". Their words are the signal you can trust and rely on. Back the fuck down when someone says "Do not want". Do not argue with them.

We're kinky hypnolovers, we play with orgasms, right? Do you know why it is so hard to stop an orgasm trigger from happening? Because orgasm is a jolt of happy chemicals that the body enjoys. Do you know why it's so hard to completely wake up a person who is deeply hypnotised or fractionated? Because being in trance, being not quite conscious and in control of ourselves, is such a blissful feeling. Our bodies don't want to stop doing that, even when our minds do. And that results in a disgusting feeling of cognitive dissonance, not being able to stop ourselves from doing something we don't want.

It's similar to trying to stop smoking. Without nicotine, but with endorphins and other happy brain chemicals. Any hypnotherapist worth their salt knows that if someone relapses, it's not because they are weak-willed or lazy or "they don't really want to stop", there is something more at work, and they need help. Someone who looks at the ecology of the problem.

We as members of the hypnocommunity have a responsibility to be good to each other, to prevent these things from happening. We all, hypnotists and subjects, have a responsibility to know the risks of our kink and to take safety precautions. And to be kind to the people who need help.

How exactly do you hypnotise someone nonconsentually? Given the basically universal agreement outside of people who get off on it that that isn't possible.

So, I've already written about that extensively. Lots of people get abused, lots of people get manipulated, forced to do things they don't want, no hypnosis required for that. Not only that, lots of people get into a situation they didn't consent to because they didn't understand what was happening and/or where it would lead.

Here's some links to posts I wrote previously on the subject of hypnosis making people do things they don't want:

Can a hypnotist make you do things you don't want?

They must have wanted it

[writtenbynath]

the updated list

Nimja

He's back and he hasn't changed. So let me share with you a list that summarises what we know about this predator

🚩His first consent violation in the Dutch kink scene that we know of was over 20 years ago. This is a long established pattern.

🚩He has been known to groom people under 18 years old. One such person reported Nimja to NEEHU because they wouldn't feel safe if he attended.

🚩Both Nimja and the organisers of NEEHU are accountable for the fact that Nimja attended NEEHU online under a pseudonym after he was banned for above reason.

🚩Multiple bans from hypno kink events in the US, UK and internationally

🚩One case of hypnotising a person who did not give consent to be hypnotised. She was traumatised and still gets very angry talking about this, even fifteen years after the event.

🚩One case of a little agreeing to play with him on the condition "nothing sexual" and he proceeded to give her a hypnotic orgasm. This was so traumatic to her, she never wants to be hypnotised again.

🚩Numerous cases of creepy behaviour.

🚩One case of sexual assault at a kink event and numerous consent violations.

🚩Multiple cases of online hypno D/s play that he ended abruptly and without giving proper aftercare, leaving them addicted to files without any recourse. Some of these women flew to the Netherlands to meet him only to be dumped.

🚩Multiple cases of gaslighting his victims into believing he had done nothing wrong and they must be bad people or they must need mental help for reacting this way.

🚩Numerous cases of trying to remove complaints and information about his abuse from online spaces, accusing people of harassing him and badmouthing his victims.

🚩The parasocial relationships he develops with his fans are unhealthy because there is an imbalance in power and he has taken no steps to change that over the years. He still uses predatory tactics to lure in young women who are inexperienced in kink and hypnosis so he can teach (groom) them, and so they won't talk back at him. He prefers them young or little so they don’t talk back.

Every new girl who becomes his fan is at risk of falling prey to this same abusive behaviour again.