#Having too many thoughts about barney . Dies

[halflifebutawesome]

Man Barney had to have had like. Complete trust in Gordon at the beginning of HL2. he fully turns his entire back to him and completely moves in a way that obstructs his vision to remove his mask and helmet. DUDE .

[decks-writing-blog]

How Long Has it Been?

Summary: From Gordon's perspective he's just killed the Nihilanth and accepted G-man's job offer before getting dropped off on the train. Clearly a lot's happened that he missed.

[A/N] I'm playing Half-Life 2 again (the VR mod of it which is awesome, if you have a VR headset, I highly recommend it) and I realized at the start, no one explains to Gordon what's up with the Combine. They weren't around when he was put into stasis by the G-man so in that moment he'd have no idea what's going on. And it's been 20 years so all his friends are gonna be visibly older so that'd probably throw him for a loop too. So in answer to these thoughts, I wrote this. He also gets to have a little sit down because being frozen in time doesn't count as having a break and he's certainly earned one.

~

If Barney hadn’t introduced himself upon lowering the helmet’s visor, Gordon might not have recognized him. He was older, not just older than Gordon where once he’d been a couple years younger but old enough that his hair was starting to noticeably gray. Just a little around the edges, he wasn’t an old man yet, but, unless he was graying super early, it was a clear sign that more than just a handful of years had gone by as Gordon had first hoped upon realizing he’d lost time when stepping off the train.

What all had Gordon missed whilst in stasis? Not just with what was going on with his friends but the world as a whole. Who were the Combine? Did they have anything to do with the aliens he’d fought before? Certainly not, right? He’d defeated their leader, or at least someone important to their attack… somehow, barely. So what was going on? How many years had it been?

He lifted his hands to ask. Too slow though, Barney was already talking again. “When Eli said you were coming, I almost didn’t believe it. And then when I saw you I almost didn’t believe it again ‘cause well… you look exactly the same as you did back when I last saw you. You haven’t aged a day.”

How could Gordon possibly look the same? So much had happened. He’d killed more people and aliens than he cared to ever think about. He’d died and come back also more times than he could ever think too much about whilst also hoping to keep whatever thread of sanity he had left intact. He’d been to an alien world and killed and alien superpower. How could none of that have changed him visually at least as much as the years had changed Barney?

“But man, is it good see you again. I uh… missed you.” Barney sagged a little, the emotion on his face unreadable. A moment later though, he shook it off as he straightened. “But as much as I’d love to chat for a a bit, we don’t exactly have time to catch up right now. We gotta get you to Kleiner’s lab, ASAP.” He turned and started typing into the console again.

A few moments later Kleiner’s face came up on the monitor. He too was visibly older; more wrinkled, balder, and what little hair he had left, entirely gray. Like Barney, he was alive though, he’d survived the Black Mesa disaster. And Barney had mentioned Eli so that meant he’d gotten out too. But… how many more survivors were there? How many casualties? Now probably wasn’t a good time to ask.

“Dr. Kleiner, you’ll never guess who just showed up,” Barney said, whatever somber emotion he’d been feeling before fully gone from his voice now.

Later, Gordon would get his answers later. For now he’d just continue to listen and do as he was told. Barney and Kleiner knew what they were doing, they’d explain it in time. Besides, Gordon had gotten quite good at forging on ahead despite emotionally not wanting to.

~

It wasn’t until the elevator slowed to a stop that it finally clicked who Alyx was, or more like who exactly she was talking about when she mentioned her dad. Perhaps it should’ve clicked with him sooner, especially after having seen visible signs of age on Barney and Kleiner, but he was still getting used to the fact that he’d been in stasis for who even knew how long.

“You’re Eli Vance’s daughter,” he signed before she could turn away as the doors opened with a soft ping. He’d never met her or seen anything more than just the single photo Eli had kept of her on his desk but Eli had talked about her sometimes. Enough that Gordon knew her name. And if she was, there was a good chance he’d have taught her sign language as it was useful for far more than just people who couldn’t speak.

She gasped, almost seeming to flinch a little. “Oh, I’m sorry, are you… do you need me to…” She awkwardly lifted her hands to sign, her movements slow and unsure. “Yes. Eli is my dad. Sorry. I’m… I’m…” She fumbled with her hands, clearly unsure how to say whatever it was she wanted to say.

“I can hear.” Gordon made sure to move his hands a bit slower than usual as she clearly wasn’t very comfortable with this form of communication. “You don’t need to sign to talk to me.” He appreciated the effort though, not everyone did.

“Oh, thank god,” she said, visibly relaxing as she lowered her hands. “For a moment there I thought you missed everything I just said. Dad taught me sign language when I was little but I don’t get many opportunities to use it outside of missions. And for those we we only really use stuff like ‘all clear’ or ‘three Combine ahead’, you know?” As she said the phrases out loud, she also lifted her hands to sign them too. “So I’m not very good at it.”

“That’s fine.”

“All right um… I guess I’m gonna have to practice that, huh? For now though, we should continue. We’re almost there.” She turned and resuming leading the way and Gordon continued to follow. Still no time to waste on talking apparently.

~

Despite never having been in this iteration of Kleiner’s lab, it still felt somewhat familiar and very Kleiner. A cluttered mess that was somehow still organized. The addition of Lamarr wasn’t nearly as shocking as everything else Gordon had seen upon waking up in the new present. In fact, it was the exact kind of thing Gordon would’ve expected from him if he’d been given the time to think about it.

As Lamarr hopped away, Gordon set to exploring. Not counting his time in stasis, it hadn’t been that long since he’d last been in a working laboratory but it certainly had felt like it had been ages. He missed it.

Would he ever be allowed to settle down and just be a normal theoretical physicist ever again? If given the chance would he even be able to? The world had changed so much while he was in stasis and he’d changed so much during the fallout of the resonance cascade. All the killing, violence, and death weren’t things he could just pretend didn’t happen. Surely there could be no peace after…

Something touched his shoulder. Flinching, he snapped around to face it as he reached for a gun that wasn’t there. He scrambled for were his crowbar should be magnetized to suit’s front instead but that also wasn’t there.

“You okay, pal?” It was just Barney looking at Gordon with a concerned expression. His hand was still raised as if he wanted to put it back on Gordon’s shoulder but didn’t dare.

Trying to pretend he wasn’t breathing a bit harder and his heart wasn’t still racing, Gordon stepped back and looked up and around to see Alyx and Kleiner looking at him with similar shocked expressions. They’d been talking to him, hadn’t they? He’d heard their voices but had been too lost in thought to pay attention. Here, that was fine, anywhere else though, a death sentence. Even if he reset afterwards, dying hurt, sometimes a lot. He’d like to avoid it whenever possible so he had to be more wary and honestly shouldn’t have relaxed as much as he had in the first place.

“I’m fine. Continue.” Somehow he managed to keep his hands steady as he signed.

Silence held for a few moments before Kleiner broke it. “Ah well, as I was saying, I upgraded your HEV suit. If you would like to put it on, I’ll go over the specifics with you.” He turned to the keypad in the wall he’d apparently walked over to whilst Gordon hadn’t been paying attention. He input a code, opening the metal door next to him. Inside was indeed the HEV suit.

Of course Gordon had to put the suit back on. He wasn’t here to rest and relax, he had a mission to complete even if he wasn’t sure of the full perimeters of it. He was good at killing people now and even better at not dying because he didn’t stay dead when he did die. There was probably no time to waste either, things were happening, he needed to get a move on. But also…

“How long has it been?” Surely asking for at least that much would be okay, right?

“Since when?” Barney had stepped back from him and lowered his hand to lean lightly on a nearby table but he was still just in arms’ reach.

“Since everything that happened at Black Mesa.”

“Oh, uh, ‘bout twenty years, I think.”

“Twenty years to the the exact date, actually,” Kleiner added. “From the resonance cascade, not since you went to Xen to kill the Nihilanth.”

Oh. He’d lost twenty years. But hey, at least he had a name for the thing he’d killed Not that helped him much. He still missed twenty years of his friends life while apparently the world went to hell even despite his efforts to save it.

“Wait, if he’s been frozen in time since the Black Mesa incident, does he not know what’s going on with the Combine and stuff?” Alyx said it in a near whisper to Kleiner, just barely audible to Gordon from over here. Thanks to the suit, all that gunfire hadn’t damaged his eardrums though so he did hear it.

Kleiner took a moment to respond, his forehead wrinkled in thought. “Now that you mention it… Gordon, do you know what’s going on? I’d assumed you’d been told but if you don’t even know how long it’s been…” He trailed off.

Ah, so they hadn’t been barreling on because they didn’t care, they’d assumed he was caught up. Probably a safe assumption to make since the man in the suit could’ve easily told him something before dropping him off on that train. “I know nothing.”

“Oh dear, we don’t have time for a full debriefing right now but you are certainly owed and explanation. Come on, come over here and sit down and I’ll give you a rundown on things.” Kleiner gestured for Gordon to come over as he walked back over to his desk. “Barney, go with Alyx and help her brush up on her sign language skills, she’s gonna need them now that’s Gordon’s back. Though, really we could probably all brush up on them some.”

The thought of sitting down and having something explained to him was almost too good to be true. Surely something would come up to interrupt them. … If so though, Gordon should hurry over to get as much explanation as he could before that happened. He jogged over while Barney and Alyx moved off to the side. Besides, he’d earned an explanation and a break. Even if it was bound to be brief, he’d happily take it.

[alwayschasingrainbows]

Tangled Web Readalong Chapter 1.7.

another long post, so sorry about it, but I have so many thoughts about one, incredibly short paragraph...:

"Peter, being notoriously and incurably left-handed, had not been accepted for overseas service." (Tangled Web).

It appears that Peter Penhallow did not fight on the front lines of World War I. Didn't he enlist in the infantry after being rejected for overseas service? Was he unable to take part in the fight because he was left-handed? I haven't heard about such cases of exclusion from combat, but maybe one of you has such knowledge?

By the way, in this novel World War I is presented in a very negative light, which is surprising in Montgomery's novels. You can see how much her bitterness has grown over the years. In Rilla of Ingleside, the war is presented as a fight for a better world: bloody, yes, but glorious nonetheless. The soldiers returned wounded and aged, but in the glow of the glory of sacrifice for a better cause.

In Tangled Web, however, we see a completely different face of war: Naomi's husband does not recognize her and does not love her as before; Donna and Virginia lose their husbands, and their grief is shown in a mocking way; one of the men dies of pneumonia before he even has a chance to leave a training camp; the other experiences a "moment of glory", but it is described ironically and without due respect.

It seems to me that Montgomery no longer believes in fighting for a better world.

In Rilla, war is presented as consuming many lives, tragic, but in a way also... glorious and not without meaning. Pacifists are portrayed as ridiculous and harmful.

In Tangled Web, however, so far none of the main characters has commented on the war as a "great victory" or "a glorious fight for the homeland." In fact, it seems that none of the characters whose adventures we have seen so far took part in it (aside from Naomi's husband).

We know absolutely nothing about Hugh's reasons not to join (or did he?). Peter did not- although given his temperament and adventurous spirit he ought to have been the first to enlist. Left-handedness seems like Maud's hastily concocted explanation. Maybe Maud believed that war robs people of everything - including their energy and love for living on the edge? Maybe she didn't want Peter to stop being Peter?

I wonder how the war might affect the characters in other of Montgomery's books. Would Barney be able to love forests and write books about them if he had to fight for survival for four years? Would Teddy be able to paint if he had to come face to face with another man - perhaps a writer, a doctor, a father - and had to choose between his life and that man's? Or Walter, with his love of beauty - would he have been able to write poetry if he had survived?

One might say that Andrew Stuart continued to live, got married and started a family. True. But he himself claimed that the war aged him ten years. We don't know the trauma he underwent. Perhaps his too quick marriage to Robin, his inability to be a good husband to his young wife and a good father to his newborn baby was the result of war trauma? Who knows what was left of Andrew-of-the-years-before in Andrew who returned in 1918?

In her later novels, I think Maud doesn't specifically mention the war in relation to her characters (except Andrew). She even creates worlds in which there is no mention of war… Emily's Quest's ending, for example never mentions the war even though it should have happened there, especially as something about the war is mentioned in Emily Climbs: "one stormy night in a February of the olden years before the world turned upside down."

Similarly, there is no mention of the war in The Blue Castle (IWW) or Mistress Pat (IIWW) - at least as far as I remember - if I am mistaken, please correct me :).

I find it so interesting how Maud's change of heart is portrayed in her novels.

[mocacheezy]

Watched Rise of Beasts with @minoan-ophidian today, so here are some of my scrambled sleepy thoughts (under readmore bcs of spoilers)

Mirage made me cry there near the end, HE CANNOT DIE AFTER ALL THIS. He grew up on me and I started caring about him so quick.

I loved how both Noah and Optimus are just trying to look out for their own people but come together in the end. NOAH AND PRIMAL SAVING PRIME WAS ALSO A MOMENT WHERE I JUST WENT YES

Birb wife died and I really, really hoped she wouldn't. I thought that was cosmic rust or something of the like. Atleast Primal was able to come to terms and make her suffering end.

Speaking of Airrazor, I cannot believe she didn't tell others she has been hurt, like Elena saw it and said it doesn't look good, they probably wouldn't be able to completely reverse it but like... Rhinox or Cheetor could stay with her? Or they would know to watch out for her, instead our poor girl looks like she's corroding and gets brainwashed by Scourge.

Elena asking Primal if the Maximals are responsible for things the ancient civilizations accomplished and him chuckling before saying they had nothing to do with it and can't take credit for human ingenuity/imagination ... I do not remember the exact words, but I am OVER THE MOON LIKE YES!! YES, THE CIVILIZATIONS HAD CONTACT BUT THE ALIENS WEREN'T WHY THEY EXISTED AND CREATED MANY AMAZING THINGS!!! I LOVED THAT!

Primal communicating and trusting the humans, the Maximals being part of the community for 100 of years, being able to trust their safety and the safety of the transwarp key... It made me emotional, especially with how Prime initially reacts to having humans help

It also made me panic a lil when Primal entrusts Noah and Elena with the key, because HE BELIEVES NO HARM WILL COME TO IT. AND NOAH ALMOST DESTROYS IT!!! LIKE!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA!!!!!

PRIME DIDN'T DIE THANK FUCK!!! I know these are supposed to be the prequels to Bayverse movies, but honestly? There could be some mumbo jumbo conjured up as to why "he might be dead, or maybe he survived". It's nice there was no need for that.

I wasn't sure Bee was going to come back, and boy am I glad there were those energon deposits on Earth

I did not expect Wheeljack. I forgot he was here, and tbh if his name was smth else that would be perf fine. But eyo.

Nightbird is my love, my life, gender goals, the queen, I am presenting my throat and I would let her slice it willingly like MA'AM. The non-binary energy as soon as she came on screen was yes. Just yes yes yes. Perfection. My she/he/they (ona/on .com) self is ECSTATIC, I love her. If I cosplay transformers in the future she is absolutely one of the characters

Arcee was so gorgeous, my bi heart was all doki doki

Scourge was also super cool and I really enjoyed the interactions with Unicron and how Prime killed him. Fucker deserved it.

Tbh I want to keep going but my eyes are falling shut from all the energy my excitement burned up so lemme just say

GREAT MOVIE!

LOVED IT!

WENT IN WITH NO EXPECTATIONS AND MINIMAL KNOWLEDGE, AND HAD AN AWESOME TIME

If I had to rate it, it would be 9.8/10, with that 0.2 just me wishing the Maximals talked more and that Barney came in frame, said Yeeeesssssss and got punched in the face by Primal. Rattrap would be too powerful if he was in the movie, he would steal all the spotlight off of Mirage, so his absence is understandable.

And @ my slovene peeps, Cineplexx theater is INSANELY GOOD folks, Supernova Rudnik delivered quality experience, 3D očala so izredno prijazna za nas špeglarje. Pokovka je gromozanska, in slushy tasted great.

So yeah, GREAT TIME, I RECCOMEND THE MOVIE, and here are pics of the earrings I made and wore to the cinema!

[lieshot]

It was too much TALKING, too many voices at once. Bucky in front of him, going on about their dad, acting as though he were still a leashed mutt. Clint off to the side, pleading for him to just stop and talk. His head felt CROWDED, thoughts racing a thousand miles a second. While Barney caught the flash of gunmetal, he didn't even react. Instead, his hands went to his own head, as if it might stop the TENSION that was forming in there. There wasn't a chance to FOCUS, his awareness fading more and more with every word.

He had known, he had to have known. This, this was all just GUILT or perhaps some sort of ploy to act innocent. It was all just lies being shouted at him. How does someone end up with the Winter Soldier and NOT know? How did someone fight against and supposedly take down HYDRA for so long and not realize who was among them? Clint had turned his back on his brother, Barney had to hold onto that firm belief so deeply ingrained in his mind. To protect his image as an Avenger, to get back at Barney for leaving for the military, there was any NUMBER of reasons as to why.

The one thing he couldn't believe was that Clint was INNOCENT in all this. If Clint had supposedly died without a body left behind, Barney back then would have moved heaven and hell to get answers so why hadn't he? Because of the mob aspect, just ASSUMED there was nothing left to find?

He was breathing heavy though even Barney couldn't determine if it was still from the rush of adrenaline or an EXHAUSTION starting to creep in. The only clear thing in his mind is he needs his bow, needs something with his knife thrown to the side. No more talking, he was so SICK of their words being thrown around, bombarding him like arrows. It was just a trick. It was just lies. HYDRA's little pet and his useless brother, they had EVERY reason to lie to him. Cover their own asses, keep him confused and keep him off his game.

Hands slowly lowered, disregarding Bucky entirely and eyes finding Clint. He was panting, the glare still set in. A long moment of silence rested between them with Barney's mind spinning. Recalling every exit for a getaway, every item in the abandoned building that could be used as a weapon if he were close enough to them. Every bit of training to be acutely AWARE of his surroundings. Finally, he gave a shake of his head. ❝ We're done talkin'. ❞

With that, he was scrambling for his discarded bow, fingers clutching around it and thumb pressing against the button to DETONATE the explosive arrow he had shot into the rafters at Clint earlier. Distraction, he just needed a distraction to get back into the damn game.

For the first time ever, Bucky was pretty thankful for the metal arm.  Barney was getting so worked up now and every blow he rained down on Bucky’s flesh was bruisingly hard.  He was starting to carve dents into his body armor and anytime the blade was angled straight down, it’s driven into him hard enough to penetrate the armor and nick his skin.  The little exposed skin on his wrist between his glove and the armor has been incidentally sliced while Bucky tries to deflect the knife, several times.

But he can see it’s working.  Barney is getting brutal but he’s wearing himself out.  The words are bothering him.  He doesn’t want them to be true, but Bucky suspects he’s starting to question that they might be.  He hopes the guy either wears himself out, or stops to question what is real.

His head rocks back when Barney headbutts him, and Bucky shoves him back as he spits blood.  “They’re still in your head.  You think I don’t know what that’s like?  I was Captain America’s kid sidekick.  You think I wanted to be THIS.  Look at your brother.  Look at him.  Why would you have stepped up like that if you didn’t think he was worth it?  They’ve poisoned you against him.  Are you going to let them?  Are you going to let them make you into your father?  You want to finish of the job that piece of shit started after all this time and all you sacrificed for him?”

Clint fires the arrow without thinking, deflecting the arrow out of the air and both the knife and the arrow go flying off to the side.  He pulls out another, but he doesn’t nock it.  “It’s true.  I checked.  You were dead.  You were dead!  I don’t know what happened since then.  I grieved for you.  I’ve been dead, Barney.  I know it happens.  But I would have come if I knew.  I would have.  Please, stop.  Stop for a second and talk to me.  We’ll put down our weapons and if you still want to kill me, I’ll take you on, you and me.  Bucky won’t get in the way.” 

Bucky drew his gun and aimed it at Barney as he staggered around.  He could end this now.  Put him down like he was going to, but he’ll let the guy take the offer.  If he doesn’t, well, Clint couldn’t say he didn’t try.

[hotontopnow]

Whos the mother in How I Met Your Mother: The Ultimate Guide

How I Met Your Mother is one of the most popular sitcoms of all time because of its clever writing, likeable characters, and many references to pop culture. But who the mother is has always been one of the biggest mysteries of the show. During the nine seasons of the show, Josh Radnor's character, Ted Mosby, told his kids how he met their mother, but we never saw her until the very end. If you're a fan of the show, you may have been left scratching your head and wondering, "Who's the mother in How I Met Your Mother?" Well, wonder no more! We'll tell you everything you need to know about the mysterious mother, from who she is to how she affects the show, in this complete guide. H1: How to Find the Mother The mother's name was one of the biggest mysteries of How I Met Your Mother. During the nine seasons of the show, Ted went through a lot of relationships, but we didn't get to meet his mother until the very end. So, in How I Met Your Mother, who is the mother? Her name is Tracy McConnell, and Cristin Milioti played her. In the last season of the show, Tracy showed up, and it didn't take long for us to find out that she was Ted's true love. H2: How the Mother Came to Be Known Even though we didn't meet the mother until the last season of the show, we could feel her presence the whole time. In fact, we were given numerous hints about her identity, including: In the first season, Ted meets a stripper named Tracy, who he thinks might be the mother. But we found out later that this was just a false lead. In season eight, there's a flash-forward to Barney's wedding, where we see the bride's foot, which is wearing the same boots that the mother wears in the last season. In the episode "Bass Player Wanted," the mother plays bass at a wedding, but we don't get a good look at her face. H2: How the Mother Changed the Show The mother had a huge impact on How I Met Your Mother, despite the fact that we didn't get to meet her until the very end. Here are some of the ways she changed the show: Ted told his children the story of how he met their mother because it was about her. The mother brought out the best in Ted, and helped him to become the person he was meant to be. The mother's death, which was shown in the last episode, was a big part of the story and tied the whole series together. FAQs: When did the show first talk about the mother? How I Met Your Mother's first episode, which aired in 2005, was the first time the mother was mentioned. In the first scene, Josh Radnor, who plays Ted Mosby, tells his kids that he is going to tell them how he met their mother. Did the people who made the show know from the start who the mother would be? Yes, Carter Bays and Craig Thomas, who made the show, knew from the start who the mother would be. But they didn't find out who she was until the last season. Was the cast kept in the dark about who the mother was? No, the How I Met Your Mother cast already knew who the mother was before the last season. Cristin Milioti was cast as the mother in season 8, but her scenes were shot in secret so as not to give anything away. Why did it take so long to find out who the mum was? The people who made the show wanted to take their time telling the story of how Ted met the mother and let the characters grow. They also wanted to keep people guessing and build up tension. How did the fans react when they found out who the mother was? The reactions to finding out who the mother was were mixed. Some fans were excited that Cristin Milioti was cast and loved her character, while others thought that the show had kept the mother's identity a secret for too long and were disappointed when it was finally revealed. Why was the end of the show a big deal? The ending of the show was controversial because it showed that the mother had died of an illness and that Ted had been telling his kids the story to get their permission to date their Aunt Robin (played by Cobie Smulders). Many fans thought that this twist went against the main idea of the show and were upset with how the story ended. Was there a hint earlier in the show that the mother would die? Yes, there were many clues and hints in the show that pointed to the mother's death. In season 6, Ted tells his kids, "Sometimes in life, you meet someone who is meant to change you." In the last season, it turns out that he was talking about his mother, but she had died before she could change him. Did the people who made the show know that people would not like how it ended? Yes, the people who made the show were aware that the ending would be controversial and that some fans would be upset. In fact, they filmed a different ending in which Ted and the mother live happily ever after, just in case they wanted to use it instead. Did finding out who the mother was affect how many people watched the show? The reveal of the mother's name didn't have a big effect on how many people watched the show. In fact, one of the most popular seasons of How I Met Your Mother was the last one. Will there ever be a spin-off or continuation of How I Met Your Mother? There have been rumours that How I Met Your Mother might get a spin-off or continue, but nothing has been confirmed. But a spin-off called "How I Met Your Father" is in the works. It will follow a new group of characters as they look for love. In the end, the mother was a very important character on How I Met Your Mother, even though she didn't show up until the very end. For nine seasons, nobody knew who she was, but when she finally showed up, she was worth the wait. Ted Mosby's love, Tracy McConnell, was played by Cristin Milioti. Her presence was felt throughout the series. She helped Ted become the person he was meant to be by bringing out the best in him. Even though the show's ending was controversial, one thing is for sure: How I Met Your Mother fans will always love the mother. So, the next time you wonder, "Who is the mother in How I Met Your Mother?" Don't forget that Tracy McConnell was the woman who won Ted's heart and made his search for true love complete. Read the full article

[80s4life]

You Take Good Care Of Her Pt.1

Word Count: 1,416

Status: Not Requested!

Fandom: The Expendables {1-3}

A/N: So this was one of my writings I have on my Wattpad, and decided to have it brought over here to Tumblr. This isn't my best work, but it's okay I guess.

Relationship: Lee Christmas x Reader 

Summary: Y/N and Barney Ross are half siblings. With their lives not being easy, the only people they had were each other, Barney raising her as his own.  But, that all changes when she decides to serve our country, earning many scars outsiders will never see.  When she returns however, she might actually get the happy ending Barney and her have always dreamed of.

Warnings: language, a little bit of angst

Masterlist The Expendables Masterlist Part Two

{Not my gif}

For the next few years, with Barney's extensive training and knowledge with hand-to-hand combat, how to quick draw a weapon, and how to know how to use it, Y/N had become a strong woman.  Y/N never understood how or why he knew these things, but yet again, she never doubted her brother for a second.  Barney has always been there for her, as he was now, teaching her self defense in the best way possible.

After Y/N had graduated high school, she joined the army, starting out as a nurse but quickly changing ranking when a horrific war came in, needing her well hidden skills.  Barney was proud of his little Gumdrop, the nickname he had given her from the day she was born, but he would be lying if he didn't say he was the least bit nervous.  He knew she could handle herself, especially when Y/N had even made it a point in learning all different types of weapons, perfecting Barney's signature skills, and going way beyond anything either of them could imagine.  Barney was almost like a proud father.

To say that military didn't change a thing about a person would've been a full-faced lie.  It had made you hard, cold to the touch, maybe in the worst ways selfish, too.  Y/N was never one to put herself first, but in the military world, although you are all fighting alongside each other as a team, the main point was for you to take care of yourself and only focus on keeping yourself alive; no one else mattered on the battlefield.

Y/N had started to write a diary, trying to keep herself from driving off the deep end into insanity.  She was lonely, something that was expected in this way of life.  Battle was a different world, a separate one from the world of the more fortunate ones, the ones not in war.  Y/N had made a few friends, but as the wars raged on outside, they slowly died off, scaring her, and not wanting to have to hurt as much as she does because of how much she cares.

But after all, nothing is permanent.  No one stays forever, and that made Y/N miss her brother all the more.  As she writes in her diary, she also wrote letters home to Barney, those that could have a range of time before getting a response back.  After all, Barney was stuck on missions, making a group called the Expendables, and spending so much time up just to not be alone, worrying for his baby sister, and if she will actually come home alive.

After 10 years, Y/N was able to return home, different, but whole.  Barney, who had responded a few weeks before, had been the first to see her come down the escalator of the airport, more than ready to feel whole again, to have his family back.  When she had spotted him, she practically tackled anyone in her way, almost tripping down the steps to get to her brother.  With a lunge and a jump, she crushed her older brother in a rib shattering hug, tears of joy not only pouring out of her eyes, but his too, although he'd never admit to it.  Clearing his throat he said, "Let's get you home Gumdrop."

After loads of catching up, Barney told her there were people he wants her to meet, as he was going to show her what he had spent so much time training her for, to be one with the boys, the Expendables.  Barney had blabbed about what it is he had done on the ride before entering Tool's shop, which is what made Y/N so eager to meet the rest of the gang, knowing what and who they were before they even entered her life.

The first person she met was Tool, an older man with a rugged smile, warm eyes, streaked hair, and a creative eye for everything he sees.  Y/N enjoyed him and took a close liking to him immediately, becoming a weird yet funny father she never had.  She was caught up in a conversation with Tool, missing the warm smile her brother had as he watched his sister find someone so alike to her, talk to her, and share interests that normal fathers would, even if it wasn't by blood.  Then, multiple other men filled the room of Tool's tattoo shop, the smell of testosterone, grease, and smoke filling the room as the roaring of motorcycle engines came pouring in, soon shutting off.

Barney and Tool introduced Y/N to every person of the group before they all spread out and did their own thing.  Toll Road, one of the members, had talked to her, being kind and gentle, a total opposite of his professional career choice.  After that, Y/N had made her rounds, talking to everyone: Gunnar Jensen, quiet, handsome, tall, and quite funny.  Yin Yang, small, quick-witted, loyal, and very caring.  Hale Caesar, the most hilarious person Y/N had ever met, very playful, and a lot of fun to hang out with.  She had met everyone, except one; Lee Christmas.  

A few times during the night, their eyes had met, as if it were electric that made them shudder and stare on many occasions.  But, although many looks were made, he had made it his duty to avoid her like the plague.  "But why?" was a constant thought that crossed her mind.

As time passed, Y/N had become just one of the guys, squeezing her tiny self into the little family they had all made.  Tool had given her her own specialty Expendables tattoo to make it official too.  Decorating it with vines and flowers, "Matching your personality," Tool would tell her, "Beautiful and delicate alongside other flowers in a bundle, yet hard and piercing when messed with by the wrong hands."  Y/N enjoyed her tattoo all the much more, taking his words to heart and placing a sweet kiss on his cheek.  She never realized the eyes that watched her so calmly from afar though.

What Y/N didn't know was how Lee actually felt, and that was a charge he knew was on him.  It never stopped him from getting jealous though, stiffening as he watched her every moves.  He had fallen for her soft Y/E/C eyes, and Y/H/L, Y/H/C hair that only she could make beautiful the second he met her.  He would talk to her every now and then, but always kept his distance, knowing exactly who she belonged to.  Barney would have his ass hit by a train if he ever touched her, and that was because she had gone through so much already, Barney not wanting anymore pain in her life.

Despite his attempts, he knew he wouldn't ever be able to resist her, and for that, he didn't care what he had to go through, he was going to have her. Because she was his, and he was hers, no matter who knew.

To be continued...

[to-boldly-nope]

Death by Tribbles- Jean-Luc Picard x Reader

Plot: {Requested by @groovy-lady} Ooh what about an imagine of fem!Reader (Picard’s wife) going on goofy shenanigans in space with Jean-Luc!!

Words: 595

A/N: Alright, when I heard goofy shenanigans, my first thought was Tribbles lol. Also requests are now closed until my school work dies down because my planning for instruction teacher honestly doesn't seem to like me as much as the rest of the class (and my girlfriend broke up with me so I'm going through some shit right now I am so sorry lmao) Also I'll add the gif later I'm sitting in my living room and I don't want my dad to know that I write Star Trek fanfiction

It all started when the replicators began to go haywire. You didn't know why or what was going on so you went to go find Geordi.

"Hey, Geordi, there's something wrong with my replicator," you told him as you watched him do an analysis on Data.

"Yeah, everybody seems to be having issues. I'll be up once I'm finished with Data."

"Great, I owe you on Geord! I'll see you two around," you waved as you went back to your shared quarters, but on the way you noticed a small ball of fur on the floor. You bent down and picked it up. It began to churp and purr and you laughed.

"Look at you! Aw, you're so cute. I can't wait to show you to Jean-Luc, he'd adore you."

So later that night, you showed your husband the little fur ball you called Barney.

"Isn't he the cutest?" You gushed as Jean-Luc picked him up. You watched as Jean-Luc examined your pet.

"He does seem to have a charm to him," Jean-Luc noted.

"I know, that's why I kept him."

"Why don't we put Barney to bed so we can get some rest?"

And that's how you woke up in a bed full of fur balls. Jean-Luc peaked his head out of the pile, trying to find you.

"What the hell happened?" Your muffled voice cried out. Trying to find a way out of the endless fur pit.

"It seems like Barney is a girl," Jean-Luc laughed as he tried to dig you out. You stuck your hand out of the pile and he grabbed it, pulling you out.

"By why so many? I woke up and all I saw was fur and I thought I was dead."

"No, it seems that you picked up a tribble."

"Oh," you mumbled. "So that means-"

"Yeah I'm sorry, mon amour. Starfleet registered them as dangerous since the repopulate too fast."

"Well hopefully we can stop them before they spread too fast."

You bent down and picked a tribble up, admiring it as it chirped. "You naughty little things. If you didn't create such a nuisance I would keep you. Let's call Data and see if he can figure something out."

~

The situation escalated rather quickly and an entire floor on the ship was full of tribbles. And poor Worf. Poor, poor Worf. Klingons and tribbles never mixed and they never will.

You tried to move throughout the deck, having difficulty since everywhere was balls of fur. Jean-Luc held onto your hand as he tried to help guide you.

"If we die here, it's technically not my fault," you pointed out.

"I would never blame it on you, my dear, however-"

You laughed as you tripped into the fur pile, dragging Jean-Luc with you. You both began to laugh, imagining the stupid cause of death. Death by tribbles, imagine.

"Til death do us part as they always said," Jean-Luc pointed out.

"They're going to change it to "Til death and/or tribble do us part"," you giggled.

In the midst of your laughing and joking, the tribbles around you disappeared, leaving you and Jean-Luc sitting on the floor. Geordi, Riker, and Data came running towards the two of you.

"Captain, (Y/N), are you two alright?" Riker asked.

"Yes, Number One, we're fine. We just thought of something ridiculous, that's all."

"Yeah, there's always something funny about tribbles, Will," you sighed, wiping some tears away. "You know Jean-Luc, that's a story we're going to have to tell our kids about if we have any."

"Of course, mon amour," he smiled.

[passp0rtguardian]

OooOoOOo gordon died and haunts barney's house to keep him safe (ghosting - mothermother inspired </3)

It's been five years since Gordon died. Barney hates having to think about that every single day.

Gordon had done it- he had went down in legend. He killed the Nihilanth, the thing that had it's bony, honestly ugly fingers wrapped around Xen. He had freed the Vortigaunts from slavery, too, but- they couldn't get to him in time. He died from the injuries he sustained during it. It still feels surreal.

Barney remembers seeing him before he went into the Xen portal so vividly. The dazed, almost drugged up look in his eyes. The scars all over his person. The way he just... robotically took all the ammo and explosives he needed. He didn't even sign a hello.

Barney wishes he would've done more on the best of days.

On the best of days, he also tries tuning out all the strange noises that have been in his apartment building since then.

He had gotten a shitty apartment after the incidents of the RESCAS, since Black Mesa had gone under and he didn't have his shitty dorm room anymore.

He chalked those strange noises up to the fact that his apartment was shitty. The soft footsteps he would sometimes hear, the creaking of the floorboards, the soft thumping against the walls.

Just faulty flooring, he would always have to remind himself. Maybe I have a family of raccoons living in my walls.

It was on worse days like these that those noises seemed way too loud; almost like they were taunting him.

But for what?

Not doing enough, probably.

He lays on the couch, sipping from a beer can with many others piled up on the ground next to him. This was how he spent most of his free days.

He still owed Gordon that beer.

A loud thump against the wall distracts him from his thoughts though; it was coming from the bathroom.

Sighing, he decides he's had enough and goes to check it out. He stumbles towards the bathroom, definitely drunk at this point. Once in the bathroom, he sees nothing out of the ordinary.

He flicks on the light. Everything that wasn't the bath, toilet, or top of the sink was coated in a fine layer of dust. He just never found use for any of the other things.

Like... the mirror. Something had made tracks in the dust on the mirror.

He moves closer, to the point he can make out letters, and then words. He mouths them to himself as he reads.

You should take better care of yourself, the message reads. He recognized that handwriting. It was so familiar it hurt. But... he was gone. How did this writing get here?

He shakes his head, but watches in amazement as more letters and words form on the space left on the mirror.

Hi :)

Somehow, that's the thing that sends Barney reeling- not the other ghostly message, but the fact he could see it being spelled out.

He takes a few steps backwards, his back slamming against the wall as he stares with wide eyes at the mirror. His breath hitches in his throat as he does the first thing he thinks of:

He grabs a notepad and a pencil.

His hands are shaking as he sets it on the edge of the sink, feeling absolutely crazy for doing this but doing it anyways. "If- if you're really here, I want you to write on the notepad. Please."

It took a moment, but the pencil started fucking floating and writing words on the notepad.

He waits until the pencil is gently set down before looking at what this mystery person wrote.

His fears - and excitement, he had to admit - are confirmed as he recognizes the handwriting.

Been a while.

Neat if not slightly slanted, Barney knew that style of writing. He also couldn't mistake that strange way of writing a capital B. He took the end of the line and curved it inwards to make a small loop inside the bottom of the B.

That was Gordon's handwriting.

Barney sinks to the floor, hand over his mouth as he just stares in shock at the notepad. It suddenly crashes to the floor along with the pencil, the pencil starting to float again.

I'm sorry

Barney couldn't help but let out a weak laugh, despite the fact tears were starting to gather in his eyes. "What are you sorry for, doc? You didn't do nothin' wrong."

I haven't been here for you

He can't help the choked sob that leaves his throat, an almost guttural noise that he's been trying to contain this entire time. "That's- that's okay. I've been okay, ya know? You- you couldn't have helped that."

I'm here for you now

Barney can't even speak anymore in fear of breaking out into loud sobs; instead, he just nods.

I've been trying to keep you safe. It's hard to do much when you're a ghost, LOL.

Please don't cry

"D-don't worry doc," Barney finally chokes out. "These are happy tears."

[alesreadings]

A Good Girl's Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson.

4.75 stars. “Pip wished she was strong enough, but she’d learned that she wasn’t invincible; she too could break.” tw: mention of rape, death of an animal, kidnapping, death, drugs. Notes. 1. If you haven't read the book and don't want to spoil yourself, I recommend that you don't read any further. 2. The spoilers section, and possible random spoilers, will be signposted to avoid any misunderstandings. I must admit that this is my first thriller book, so I'm not very familiar with the genre, and now I want to read more. And it's also one of the first I've read entirely in English, and as you know that Spanish is my native language, I assume you'll know that it was a bit complex. Although, I'm adapting a bit more to reading in English. Wish me luck, folks. In A Good Girl's Guide to Murder we follow Pippa Fitz-Amobi, a 17-year-old student whose final year project is the case of Andie Bell, who was murdered by her boyfriend, Sal Singh and taken for granted by the police. But Pippa knows Sal is innocent, so she decides to find out what happened five years ago and who really killed Andie Bell. Pippa discovers that Andie had many secrets, that she was not the beautiful and tragic victim that the people of Little Kilton martyred and idolised, branding Sal Singh a murderer and a monster, treating his family very badly for it. In addition, Little Kilton holds even more secrets that intrigue Pip and make her want to keep digging to solve the mystery. Writing. I don't think I remember reading a book like this, with diary-like entries speaking in first person and then in third person. It was a bit strange, if I'm honest, and it took me a bit longer to adjust. However, it was an easy read in some respects. And, I don't know if it's because of the difference between British and American English, but there were phrases that I had to look up because I didn't understand them, lmao. Plot. The plot kept me glued in my seat, not wanting to put my phone down, wanting to know what would happen next. I mention that I was late with this book because college is eating me alive, though I made time to keep reading because I was consumed with thoughts of not knowing what would happen, who the killer would be and if Pip was going to find out. There are a lot of plot twists that I wasn't expecting and a lot of things that made my brain almost melt from thinking about it so much. Pacing. It was a quick and light read, and I take back that I was late because of college: I would have finished it sooner if it weren't for homework. It's not that complicated to understand and the pages turn very quickly. Characters. Pip is a good girl, addicted to homework and determined to solve the Andie Bell case and prove that Sal Singh is innocent at all costs. So eager is she to find out what really happened, that she finds herself lying to others so that they won't worry about her and try to stop her from abandoning her project. Ravi is the younger brother of Sal Singh. He has been the target of criticism, and is known as the brother of Andie Bell's killer. Ravi knows his brother is innocent, and when Pip shows up at his door asking him a few questions, he thinks it's a joke. And soon, Ravi becomes Pip's partner in crime, both looking for answers about his brother's sudden death and his innocence in the case. Ravi is a beautiful little baby, don't touch him I want to take care of him. Also, Ravi: marry me. Andie was a bitch and it doesn't surprise me much that bad things happened to her. Everyone held her in such high regard, believing she was a good girl whose boyfriend murdered her. Andie ruined several people's lives, and although I thought I would feel bad that she had died, I didn't really. When you find out the truth about Andie Bell, what she did and didn't do, you don't feel any empathy for her. Cara is Pip's best friend, her older sister is Naomi, who was in turn Sal's best friend and who also keeps a big secret that makes Pip dig very closely into her and her life, including her family. (Bonus and unnecessary fact: Cara translates from

Spanish to English as: 'face' and 'expensive'. Unnecessary examples: Su cara es hermosa= her face is beautiful. La camisa es cara= the shirt is expensive.) Follow me for more unnecessary Spanish classes, they are free of charge. Pip's family is ok. They're the typical caring and normal family. Tho I loved Vic's jokes, jsjsjs he laughing at his own jokes (just as Ravi) is totally me. Max Hastings can die and I wouldn't care for him. He deserves the shit going on in his life. He's a dick and you can easily see it. Please, go fuck yourself, you fucking bastard. 🥰🥰🥰 ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️oK, PEOPLE, SPOILER SECTION. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ Tho I loved this book, I really enjoyed and liked it a lot, there were many ??? things that left me with a bitter taste on my mouth. First of all, Pip felt a little bit dry and typical. She's a good girl who starts to lie for her project and she doesn't feel the same anymore. I mean, idk, I can't put it into words, I just hope she felt more real and not flat. Second, how quick all of the possible suspects told Pip the truth, when they lied to the police or omitted information. I found it quite unbelievable and a little bit ilogic. Also, Mr. Ward confessed really quick and it felt dry... I don't quite know how to explain it, but I was expecting more. Becca Bell also confessed really quick, and spilled her secrets out as she were talking about the weather, which also felt a little bit bitter. aND THE FINAL STRAW: BARNEY. NO. NO. NO. NOT MY BABY BARNEY. HE WAS AN ANGEL AND I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HIM WITH LOVE. LEANNE CRYING OVER THE CHRISTMAS' VIDEO OF BARNEY GIVING EVERYONE A SHOE BROKE ME DOWN. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE THIS!!! ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ End of the spoiler section⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ In summary, I really liked this book, was a quick reading and many plots got me hanging of the cliff. This is a "you must read" book.

[spencereliotwinchester]

That Summer Storm Chapter Two

Title: That Summer Storm Chapter Two

Chapter Title: Once Upon a Midnight Dreary

Author: Kat

Reader Gender: Female

Word Count: 2k

Series Summary:

Jensen kept his eyes on the floor, but nodded his understanding. He was too scared to look up into the guard’s face; he didn’t even trust his voice not to break. He didn’t look up until he heard the click-lock sound of his door. The room was very small. Along one wall was a set of metal-framed bunk beds. The far wall had a small desk with a stool. Opposite the bunk beds was a toilet and sink.

He sat down on the bottom bunk, head in his hands. I shouldn’t be here, I’m only fifteen, the thought ran through his head on a loop. This was not how his life was supposed to go. Jensen rubbed his knuckles into his forehead, hard. The sobs of his mother would haunt him. It had been all he could hear the entire van ride back to juvenile hall.

Warnings: There will be feelings!

Chapter Warnings: Solitary Madness, anxiety attack

Catch Up HERE

A/N: Little bit longer of a chapter. Next one may be a bit shorter. Please please please reblog or let me know what you think!!

Character: Jensen Ackles

---

Tags:

@iwantthedean@lyarr24@janicho88@deans-baby-momma@sandlee44@mrswhozeewhatsis@blacktithe7@torn-and-frayed@the-jette-blog@supernatural-jackles@sacriceria@siospins@negans-lucille-tblr@eve-loves-apples@myinconnelly1@mariekoukie6661@stoneyggirl2@thisisallicansay@jjrp-obsessed67@amyzombie1013@mrskcreeves95

---

The door click-locked shut and Jensen pressed himself into the corner of the room. He was hyperventilating and failing to calm himself down. Pressing his entire side into the cool wall and squeezing his eyes shut, Jensen tried to block out everything except the feeling of the wall. It barely registered that the door to the room opened and shut again.

“What are you doing?” It was the same voice that came to his rescue out in the yard, though it sounded reproachful. Padalecki moved around the room for awhile, pacing, then Jensen heard the top bunk bed creak. “Don’t let Roger catch you like that. He’ll throw your ass in solitary-”

“There’s too much space!” Jensen gasped. He slid down the wall, crouching in the corner.

“Jesus, did Tito dose you or something?” The bed creaked again, then there were footsteps coming toward Jensen.

Jensen started trembling, thinking back to Padalecki’s words: “he’s mine.” He’d heard stories about detention centers, stories that made his skin crawl. Now here he was, about to live through it. Instead of the rough hands Jensen had expected, a blanket was wrapped around him, tightly. The pressure around his body let him relax, finally. Jensen opened his eyes and was met with the hazel-brown eyes of his roommate.

Padalecki was tall, taller even than Jensen. He was lean and well built though. His eyes were hard, though, unkind, which was completely unmatching his actions. Padalecki had the blanket in his hands, pulling it as tightly as he could around Jensen’s body.

“Chill out, will you, Jensen? Fucking stupid name, by the way,” Padalecki said, rolling his eyes. He tied the blanket and moved away from Jensen, climbing back up to the top bunk.

Jensen moved to his bunk, slowly. He curled up as close to the wall as he could. He pulled the blanket tightly around him.

“It was many and many a year ago, in a kingdom by the sea, that a maiden there lived whom you may know by the name of Annabel Lee; and this maiden she lived with no other thought than to love and be loved by me,” Padalecki’s voice was soft as it drifted from the top bunk. “I was a child and she was a child, in this kingdom by the sea, but we loved with a love that was more than love - I and my Annabel Lee - With a love that the winged seraphs of Heaven coveted her and me.”

Padalecki read the entire poem in his soft, calming voice. By the end, Jensen’s breathing had finally returned to normal and he felt better than he had since he’d been arrested.

“Thanks, Padalecki,” Jensen whispered; he was unsure if Padalecki had even heard him.

“You can call me Jared,” came a few minutes later.

--May 1996--

Life at Travis County Correctional became a mundane routine for Jensen. Monday through Friday they had school and on the weekends they had more recreational time, but the schedule never deviated. Jensen and Jared had even fallen into a nightly routine, at nine pm they were sent to their room and had one hour of quiet time before lights out. They would get into their respective bunks and Jared would quietly read from his one and only possession: The Complete Tales & Poems of Edgar Allan Poe. They’d gone through the whole book at least three times, but neither of them seemed to care.

Late one night, Jensen was suddenly startled awake by the sound of laughing. It started as a low snicker but quickly worked itself up into shrieks. Jensen scrambled out of bed to find Jared sitting at the desk. He turned quickly and locked eyes with Jensen. There was no mirth in his laughter and his eyes were black and dangerous looking. Jensen’s heart was suddenly in his throat and he backed up until he came into contact with the door.

“Jared?” Jensen’s voice quivered in fear.

“Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious of forgotten lore - While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door…” Jared’s voice was suddenly smooth, even, and it scared Jensen even more. Jared pointed a finger at Jensen, indicating to him to continue.

“‘Tis some visitor,’” Jensen squeaked, but his voice failed him. He turned and pressed the emergency call button that was located to the right of the door. Jared started laughing again, low and evil. He was still laughing when Barney, the night guard, came through the door. Jensen threw himself into the corner.

“There better be someone…” Barney’s voice died out as his flashlight fell on Jared, still laughing maniacally.

Barney called into his radio for backup and it was quick to arrive. They carted Jared off, but Barney stayed behind. He was a middle-aged black man, with kind brown eyes, and a little extra weight around his middle. His radio crackled, but Jensen couldn’t understand a word that was said.

“Come on, let’s go,” he said, helping Jensen to his feet.

“What?” Jensen’s brow furrowed.

“We gotta toss the room for drugs.”

Barney silently led Jensen through a labyrinth of dark hallways then through a door marked “Pod S.” A guard at a desk glanced up at Barney, nodded, and went back to his book. Barney prodded Jensen through a barred gate. They were now in a dead-end hallway with doors on either side. Barney opened door number one and lightly pushed Jensen inside. Barney gave him a sad, almost guilty look, before shutting the door. It click-locked with a finality that scared Jensen.

The only reason he wasn’t shrouded in complete darkness was the window in the door. The room he was in was small, much smaller than his normal cell. Everything was padded and the only furniture in the room was a small cot on the floor. A low rumble of thunder startled him and he wished he were back in his normal cell. Within minutes the building shook and shuddered from violent crackling booms of thunder. Jensen curled himself on the cot and wrapped the blanket around himself as tightly as he could.

He couldn’t sleep with the raging storm outside and his heart was still hammering from what had happened with Jared. Jensen looked around the padded room. Another clash of thunder. Jensen wondered what time it was, he wondered how long they were going to leave him here, and he wondered why they’d left him here. Jensen closed his eyes and started humming, trying to drown out the noise of the storm raging outside.

The storm was still going full force when the fluorescent lights clicked on. Six am. Jensen sat up on the cot, wrapping the blanket more tightly around himself. Soon, the door would unlock, and Roger would take him to breakfast. Jensen would welcome the sight of even Roger’s unfriendly face instead of the white padded room he was in.

Jensen counted the minutes until seven am. Nothing happened. At seven forty-five, there was a clicking sound. Jensen walked over to the door, expecting it to open. Instead, a rectangular hatch in the door was opened downward, creating a little table and a tray of food was set down.

“What’s happening?” Jensen yelled.

There was no response.

Eventually, the tray of food was taken out of the door and the hatch was closed and locked. Jensen paced the small room, seven steps, turn, four steps, turn, seven steps, turn, four steps, turn, seven… Alone. His thoughts matched in time with his steps. Completely alone. No one will come for you. All alone.

“Alone…”

Jensen froze. It had been a whisper, sure, but… It couldn’t be. Jensen took a deep, shaky breath. Get hold of yourself, Ackles, he thought. He rubbed his knuckles hard into his forehead. It was nothing, his mind was playing tricks on him.

“It is nothing but the wind in the chimney,” Jensen recited out loud. “It is only a mouse crossing the floor,-”

“Or it is merely a cricket which has made a single chirp!”

Jensen whirled around, his heart hammering in his throat again. The door to the padded cell was open and in the doorway was an old gentleman in a collared shirt, an argyle sweater vest, pressed pants, and loafers.

“Poe at his best! That’s one of my favorites as well. Care to have a seat, Jensen?”

Jensen slowly sat down on the cot, not taking his eyes off the man. Jensen realized the room was very quiet now, the storm must have died down while he was lost in his thoughts. The man brought with him a stool as well as a briefcase and he sat down across from Jensen. A young woman brought in her own stool and sat down in the corner. The door closed and click-locked.

“My name is Dr. Langstrom and this is one of my students, Abigail. I want to talk to you about what happened last night, and I’ll need to take some blood,” the man introduced himself, then took a small journal from his pocket along with an expensive looking pen.

“Is Jared okay?” Jensen chewed on his bottom lip.

“Don’t worry, now are you scared of needles?” The doctor asked and he began to take some plastic wrapped items out of the briefcase.

“No, but, why are you taking blood?” Jensen asked, holding out his arm.

“Just make sure everything’s alright with you.”

Dr. Langstrom took an alcohol wipe and rubbed Jensen’s arm. With his tongue sticking between his teeth, the doctor squinted at the needle. Then he paused for a moment, and pulled out a package of gloves and put them on. He took the needle again and pricked it into Jensen’s arm and Jensen hissed. Then, Dr. Langstrom actually moved the needle around, attempting to find a vein.

“Ow!”

“Sorry, sorry, let me try again,” Dr. Langstrom said vaguely.

“Doc, the tourniquet,” Abigail prompted.

“Yes, yes! That’s right!”

Dr Langstrom pulled the strip of rubber from his bag and wrapped it around Jensen’s upper arm. His second, third, and fourth attempts were no better than the first, however.

“Um, Doc, would you like me to do that? I just finished my lab rotation,” Abigail spoke quietly from the corner.

“Of course Abigail, that would be wonderful. I haven’t drawn blood in fifteen or twenty years.”

Abigail put on a pair of gloves and switched places with the doctor. She adjusted the tourniquet tighter and then she calmly took the needle and palpated Jensen’s arm. With one smooth movement, the needle was in and blood trickled into the waiting vial.

“Now, Jensen,” Dr. Langstrom started after Abigail finished drawing his blood. “Can you tell us what happened last night? Did Jared take anything?”

“I don’t know. I woke up and he was laughing. I hit the call button and Barney came in,” Jensen explained simply, picking at a loose thread on his jumpsuit.

“That’s all?”

“Uh, yeah,” Jensen shrugged.

“Were you attacked? Did he bite you or spit at you in any way?”

“What? No,” Jensen’s worry bled into his words.

“Good, good. Are you feeling well? No feelings of euphoria or despair?”

“I’m fine,” Jensen said through gritted teeth. “What’s happening with Jared? Where is he?”

“Good, good. Unfortunately, I can’t tell you anything about Jared.”

Jensen mulled that over for a moment. Then, his bladder reminded him it’d been way too long since his last bathroom visit.

“Can I go to the bathroom?”

“I’ll let the guard know.”

Abigail and Dr. Langstrom gathered their things and knocked on the door. It opened for them and closed behind them. Then, the hatch opened.

“Present yourself to be cuffed, Ackles,” came a deep baritone voice.

Jensen slid his hands through the hatch and winced as handcuffs were tightened around his wrists. Jensen stepped back and the door opened. He was taken to a small bathroom and then straight back to the padded cell. All attempts at talking to the guard were met with stony silence. Once back in the room, handcuffs removed, Jensen sat down on the cot.

Added/Subtract from taglist HERE

Let me know what you think! Send me a message, reblog, or send an ask! However you’d like!

[alloverthegaf]

Have you seen How I met Your Mother? If so thoughts?

boiiiiiiii more thoughts than I could write in an answer

to summarise, I guess: I adored the show, I found the humour and storylines so fun and the writing so fresh and it was the comedy show of my generation, the one we all went to school talking about the latest episode

and I, like many, adored Barney and Robin’s relationship, from Barney’s first crush, their first failed attempt at a relationship, the relapses - we powered through the seasons of forced other relationships clearly meant to just drag on the drama of those two, which I do get but also, not fun. and then the entire. fucking. last. season. was based around the weekend of their wedding. the ENTIRE last season was set on the weekend of their wedding.

and also to be fair to people who were more invested in Ted and the mother, literally the entire SHOW was obviously supposed to be the story of how Ted met the mother of his children. that was how it was supposed to end. with Ted meeting the mother and falling in love and telling his kids, “THAT’S how I met you mother.”

and in like 30 minutes the writers decided to shatter everything the show had become. they destroyed the long awaited and obviously built up destined love of Robin and Barney by having them get divorced, because Robin was too focused on her career, something that had been a part of her character and one of the obstacles she dealt with in relationships from the beginning, something Barney had accepted her for.

they shattered the entire point of the show being about meeting the mother, because in those last 30 minutes she had died and Ted was for the fifth time in love with Robin, and the entire point of him telling his kids his story was because he was nervous about getting their approval for dating (their AUNT) Robin.

all the more insulting by the fact that the only reason the writers decided to go with these horrible decisions is because that was the plan when they created the show, NINE YEARS EARLIER, before like 80% of what ended up happening had been planned, and they had recorded the kids early based off the original ending and they were like “well, the kids look the right age here, we’re lazy, let’s fuck up like 5 years of character and story development.”

it’s the original game of thrones. no, seriously. it was a show with such popularity and hype and was so beloved, and right when they needed to stick the landing, the writers got impatient and lazy and messy and destroyed their entire work. himym was talked about and hyped so consistently and so enthusiastically for so many years and with one decision they wiped himym from the pop culture map. no one talks about it anymore, no one writes about it anymore. good luck finding merch. good luck finding a fan that doesn’t get angry just thinking about how it ended. even now I have himym cravings and still find it so hard to enjoy earlier episodes knowing how it ends. that show was one of my all time favourites and I still love it to pieces, but also literally FUCK that show don’t talk to me about it.

in conclusion sorry I guess I lied about summarising also I love himym but also fuck that goddamn show

[twh-news]

[The article contains spoilers for The Good, The Bart and The Loki]

When Disney Plus launched with all of “The Simpsons” episodes, the team behind the longest running primetime TV series in history were thrilled.

“It’s a perfect fit and, you know, 100 million subscribers,” says executive producer Al Jean with a chuckle.

But there was one catch: While Disney Plus has specific tiles on its home screen for Pixar, Marvel and Star Wars, “There’s no tile that actually says ‘The Simpsons,'” he says.

So co-creator and executive producer James L. Brooks suggested “The Simpsons” should invade the rest of Disney Plus, through a series of crossover short films.

“It was just the desire that we had to reach out to the viewers [of] the other branches of Disney Plus, to see if they would be interested in us — you know, if they hadn’t seen us as much,” Jean says.

The first short, “The Force Awakens From Its Nap” — which placed Maggie Simpson inside the world of “Star Wars” — premiered on May 4 (i.e. the May the Fourth “Star Wars” holiday). As that film was wrapping up production in April, Jean zeroed in on Marvel Studios’ series “Loki” for their second film — but they had to move with superhuman speed, since that show was premiering in June.

The result is “The Good, The Bart, and the Loki,” with Tom Hiddleston voicing his signature role as the wily god of mischief after he’s banished from Asgard and lands, to his horror, in Springfield.

“They couldn’t have been nicer at Marvel,” says Jean. “They said, ‘Hey, would you like the Avengers music?’ And we said, ‘Would we?! Yes!'”

As Jean revealed in his conversation with Variety, the team behind the film, lead by director David Silverman, leaned into their knowledge of not just past films and series in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but the upcoming film “Thor: Love and Thunder” — and, for the final post-credits scene, they had just a week to turn it all around.

There’s a great tableau in which a whole bunch of different Simpsons characters appear as the Springfield Avengers, including Barney Gumble as Iron Man and Milhouse as Hawkeye. How did you decide all that?

That was the most fun thing. In the room, we were just putting them together, and it was really fast. It was like, Patty and Selma are the Scarlet Witch and Agnes. My favorite was Ralph as the Hulk and Herman as Captain America — because he wears the Captain America shield on his shirt because he’s a gun store owner. It was about 10 minutes to put that together. We would’ve had more — I mean, there’s 100 Avengers — but we were just trying to make sure that the production got done on time.

When you made Lisa into Thor, was that a tip of the hat that…

…that Natalie Portman is going to be Thor in “Love and Thunder”? Absolutely. And then, to me, it was really funny that, you know, now that Lisa is Thor, she even has that over Bart, so he’s really aggravated. The parallel between Bart and Lisa and Loki and Thor is pretty clear.

Did Marvel have any notes? Or did they just kind of let you do your thing?

They really were great and supportive. The only note we had was we thought we could have a cameo by Stan Lee. We’re putting as many cameos and post-credits sequences into a four minute short as possible. But they said that their policy is that since he passed, they don’t use him in movies anymore, which I understood completely. And we had him on the show three times, so we had our shot.

The final post-credit sequence evokes the “Loki” Disney Plus show completely, down to the production design. How much turnaround time did you have for that?

A week, and it was really a nail biter. Jim Brooks said, ‘Oh, we’ve got to do something with the series now that it’s on,’ because we were coming out July 7. So that was based on the first episode only. I hadn’t seen the other three, and obviously, I have no idea how it ends, either. I suspect Loki is up to no good. That’s my theory.

Wait, so you had a week to write, record, and animate that?

Yep. We recorded Dawnn Lewis as the Judge. David Silverman turned it around that fast. So that whole ending, whatever, minute, is in a week.

The short ends with Lisa unknowingly sending Bart into oblivion and Loki takes over Bart’s life.

Well, in the last short, Maggie dies. She comes back as a force ghost, but she’s dead. This one, Bart doesn’t seem to have very good ending. [Laughs] Homer seems to be eating Flanders at the end of the Loki story, too, so there’s a lot of grim stuff under the surface!

So do you think that you’ll revisit the world of Marvel or the world of Star Wars again?

We definitely want to keep doing these shorts — definitely [with] those two, but also with the other properties, like Pixar and the classic Disney movies. We’ll probably take a little more time on the next one. We haven’t settled on what we’re going to do yet, but there are just so many things that are just so, you know — I mean, as a kid, I was a huge fan of Marvel. I started collecting when I was six. These are the things that we would want to crossover or parody, anyways.

[tcm]

Andy Griffith: An Underrated Movie Star By Susan King

Andy Griffith was one of the greatest actors of the 20th century. He didn’t make the impact of his peers Marlon Brando, James Dean and Paul Newman when they all burst onto the scene in the 1950s, but Griffith demonstrated he was an actor of depth, complexity and, at times, brilliance during his 50-plus year career. His depth is especially on display in his greatest role as Lonesome Rhodes, the odious hard-living, hard-loving Arkansas drifter who becomes a television sensation in Elia Kazan’s A FACE IN THE CROWD (’57).

A dark social commentary about power and the media, A FACE IN THE CROWD is as prescient today as it was 63 years ago. It wasn’t a hit upon release but has grown in reputation over the years. And, it’s head scratching to believe that Griffith wasn’t nominated for a Best Actor Oscar for his performance.

Perhaps he’s not uttered in the same breath as a Brando because Griffith achieved his greatest success on the small screen. He starred as the gentle widower Sheriff Andy Taylor in the beloved 1960-68 sitcom The Andy Griffith Show and as the folksy but brilliant and often cantankerous attorney Ben Matlock in the 1986-95 legal eagle series Matlock. Despite his popular, genial and understated turn as Andy Taylor (who many kids thought was the best father around), Griffith didn’t even earn an Emmy nomination.

Griffith originally wanted to be a singer or a preacher but ended up teaching at a local high school after graduating from college. But the lure of performing was too great, and he left the chalkboard behind to become a comic monologist. And he was funny. Check out his most famous routine, “What It Was, Was Football” from a 1954 The Ed Sullivan Show on YouTube. He’s so believable as the backwoods rube, audiences undoubtedly thought that was Griffith’s real character.

The year of 1955 was life-changing for Griffith. He became an overnight sensation after he was cast in the lead role as the naïve Air Force Private Will Stockdale in the live TV comedy No Time for Sergeants. He’s so mirthful as the good old boy that members of the crew can be heard laughing. Later that year, he made his Broadway debut in the stage version of No Time for Sergeants earning rave reviews and a Tony nomination. It was while he was the toast of Broadway that he was approached by Oscar-winning screenwriter Budd Schulberg (ON THE WATERFRONT, ‘54) about playing Lonesome Rhodes.

Griffith told me in a 2005 L.A. Times interview that Schulberg and his mother came to see the play and soon after Griffith met the writer at a bar. Ironically, Schulberg didn’t think Griffith could handle such a ruthless character. “We were sitting there talking and drinking,” Griffith recalled. “He told me, ‘you can’t play this role.’ I had never read the script or his short story on which it was based at that time, but I just kind of envisioned the character. I said, ‘I can’t provide it to you…but I can play it.’”

Kazan also had his doubts, but quickly changed his mind when Griffith did an impression of evangelist Oral Roberts “healing” the filmmaker. “At that moment, he and Budd could see that I had a little wild side – that is, I can create a wild side. So Gadge [Kazan’s nickname] used that. He used that part of me to find the emotions of evil, the various thousands of moods that this man had.”

Kazan and Schulberg, Griffith noted, “were trying to make the social commentary that the medium and the people who control it can control the thoughts of the country and how dangerous that can be,” Griffith said. The director told Griffith to drink some whiskey for this film’s conclusion when Rhodes is unveiled as a phony and a demagogue. “They brought me a bottle of Jack Daniels Black Label,” he said. “I would shoot a little bit and drink a little bit. I thought I was great. Gadge pulled the plug around 3 o’clock. The next day he said, ‘Andy, we have to shoot most of that over again. Today, just smell the cork!’”

The 1958 film version of NO TIME FOR SERGEANTS and another 1958 service comedy, ONIONHEAD just didn’t work and bombed with both critics and audiences. “I basically struck out in Hollywood,” Griffith told me in 1993. He returned to Broadway, earning another Tony nomination for the musical version of Destry Rides Again. Griffith admitted, though, the show wasn’t very good. So, he decided to do television. The pilot for The Andy Griffith Show, which also starred Ron Howard as his young son Opie, Frances Bavier as Aunt Bee and Don Knotts as the ultra-nervous deputy Barney Fife, aired on the popular The Danny Thomas Show. The show was quickly snapped up by CBS to develop into a series.

Knotts, who won five Emmys as Fife, wasn’t in the pilot. Knotts, who appeared with Griffith in NO TIME FOR SERGEANTS, called him and said, “Don’t you need a deputy?” “I was supposed to have been the comic, the funny one,” said Griffith. “It might not have lasted even half of season that way, but when Don came on, I realized by the second episode, he should be funny, and I should play straight to him. “

Despite the fact the series was the no. 1 show, Griffith wanted to stretch his acting muscles and the series ended in 1968. But Hollywood still didn’t know what to do with him. He signed a three-picture deal with Universal, but the first film ANGEL IN MY POCKET (’69) had a devil of a time trying to find an audience and the critics were not impressed. He struck out again and returned to the small screen. In between series work, TV movies and guest spots, Griffith appeared on the big screen, most notably in the sweet nostalgic comedy HEARTS OF THE WEST (’75) with Jeff Bridges and Alan Arkin.

He finally earned an Emmy nomination in 1981 for the TV movie MURDER IN TEXAS, in which he got the opportunity to show his dramatic chops as a wealthy Texan who thinks his daughter’s new husband isn’t exactly who he appears to be. His turn in Matlock gave him a renewed popularity. Griffith was doing guest spot on TV and had just released a hymns and spirituals CD when I interviewed him in 2005. Two years later, Griffith was perfectly cast in WAITRESS (2007) as Joe, the elderly and curmudgeonly owner of a small café who had a generous and kind heart. The role fit him like a comfortable glove.

Baby boomers felt they had lost a big part of their childhood when Griffith died in 2012 at the age of 86. Ron Howard summed up what so many of his fans were feeling: “His pursuit of excellence and the joy he took in creating served generations and shaped my life. I’m forever grateful. RIP Andy.”

[wannajointhecrabcult]

Reckless Rescuer

I literally just came up with this idea at midnight last night when I was just starting to go into fever dream mode so... This will be interesting. You asked to be tagged so here you go @justconfusedperiod!

Imagine that Marinette never became Ladybug.

Master Fu chose actual adults to go save Paris while Sabine and Tom gave Marinette combat training.

Despite not being a hero Marinette was still caught up in a lot of akuma attacks (Because Hawkmoth is a bitter ass) so she learned how to use everything and anything to her advantage.

Even though she's crafty Marinette still dies in akuma attacks and gets revived by the Miraculous Cure at the end of the day.

As sad as it is, she becomes used to dying.

That doesn't mean that she TRIES to get hurt during attacks, it just means that she expects her life to end one day because of an akuma or something and for her to not come back, so dying isn't a fear for her anymore.

She also builds a tolerance for pain during attacks where she doesn't die, but still gets very injured.

It's amazing how trauma can practically destroy someone's life while others are just so desensitized that it doesn't affect them anymore.

One day the Dupain-Chengs move to Gotham to both expand their business, and to get away from a certain magic fueled fashion disaster.

I mean, seriously.

You're supposed to be a designer but here you are walking around looking like a cardboard candy cane beige toothpick of a man.

Don't get me started on what the heck happened with Hawkmoth's costume.

What is that?

Are you wearing a silver condom on your head or what??

Anyways, Marinette attends Damian's school and they bond over being the only one's not overly worried about danger in certain situations.

At one point Damian thought that she might have been a hero or something but threw that thought away when he witnessed her somehow fall UP a staircase. (I've actually done this before. Surprisingly it's pretty fun.)

All was fine and dandy until one afternoon when they were walking to Neti's place after school to work on a project.

They were walking through a less populated part of the city and were passing a shoe store when two thugs held them at a gunpoint demanding for their cash.

The youngest Wayne was fully prepared to attack the men when Marinette started scolding them for being rude?

Marinette: Hey! You can't just do that! Do you know how rude it is to interrupt someone's conversation?! Apologize right and leave us alone right now OR ELSE.

The two men just looked at her for a moment before doubling over and bursting out in laughter.

After all, what can this tiny school girl do to hurt them?

The first guy calmed down and was about to threaten them again when all of a sudden a pink flat was thrown at his face.

Because of he was unprepared and because of the force behind the flying shoe, he was knocked over and fell to the floor with a thud.

The second guys turned to look at the girl who just threw her shoe at his partner when he was suddenly wacked in the face as well.

So there they were.

Two teenagers, one with no shoes on, in front of a show store with two thugs at their feet.

Truly a sight to behold.

Marinette turns to Damian and asks him for his shoes.

When he doesn't respond (he's in shock) Marinette just shrugs, turns around, and SMASHES HER ARM THROUGH THE GLASS WINDOW OF THE SHOE STORE TO GRAB A CROC AND CHUCK IT AT THE FIRST GUY AGAIN BECAUSE HE WAS GETTING UP.

She then turns to the second dude who was on his knees and says in a dark tone, "You better go and leave us alone before I get my hands on a pair of iceskates. Got it?"

He nods his head and scrambles to run away from the short girl with pigtails that just single handedly smashed her arm through glass and was somehow not wincing in pain from her many bleeding cuts and she threw shoes at them.

His partner frantically got to his feet and followed him.

After making sure that the two would-be-muggers are far away Mari turns to Damian and waves her still bleeding hand in front of his face.

"Heelllooooo? Anybody home?"

She then shakes his shoulders a bit.

Damian, now no longer in shock, starts freaking out about her injuries.

"oh...my...gosh....oh my gosh... oH MY GOSH YOU'RE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE!! OHMYGOSH THAT WAS SO RECKLESS OF YOU, YOU COULD HAVE DIED AND OH NO YOU JUST STRAIGHT UP BROKE A GLASS WINDOW WITH YOUR BARE HANDS!! YOU FUCKING IDIOT YOU'RE HURT! WE NEED TO GETYOUFIRSTAIDOHMYGOSH!!!"

She tries to get him to calm down but that honestly makes him freak out even more.

"HOW ARE YOU NOT REACTING TO THE PAIN OF CUTTING YOUR ARM WITH MULTIPLE PIECES OF GLASS?!? YOU FREAKING THREW SHOES AT THEM! SHOES! WHAT IF YOU FREAKING DIED FROM THAT?!?"

"Well that would make it the 2615th time."

"...."

"....."

"Excuse me but wHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT WOULD'VE BEEN THE 2615TH TIME YOU DIED?!??!??"

Marinette was trying to get him to breathe since he was almost on the verge of a panic attack when the owner of the shoe store came out with a first aid kit.

The elderly woman proceeded to patch up Marinette's arm while thanking her for scaring away the muggers.

"Those two just keep scaring the customers away so I cannot thank you dearie enough!"

"Oh, it was no problem ma'am. They really needed to learn some manners anyways!"

"They really are so rude aren't they. And there we go! Your arm is all bandaged up. I would be careful with it if I were you."

She old lady then turns to Damian who has calmed down a bit now that Marinette's arm is bandaged.

"You've got quite a wild girlfriend here. Be sure to watch out for her safety or else you're gonna lose her."

That causes the two teens faces to burn red.

"Oh no you've got it wrong. She's not my girlfriend although I do agree that I should start looking out far her health more." He turns to Marinette as he says the last bit.

She just replies with a sheepish smile and a shrug.

"She's definitely going to give me gray hairs early."

The store owner gave Marinette and Damian a knowing look before sending the two on their way.

On the walk to Marinette's house Damian kept scolding her for her brash decisions and worrying over her arm at the same time.

At one point Damian asked her if she could actually feel the pain from her cuts or not and she just replied with "I got injured a lot when I lived in Paris so I have a high pain tolerance. This isn't even the worst wound I've ever gotten."

Needless to say, that did not reassure Damian at all.

When they did reach their destination they ended up deciding to finish the project on another day to let Marinette's arm heal a bit.

He calls Alfred to pick him up and when faced with the butler's questioning stare he just replies with "Too much excitement for today."

Before the limo drove off Marinette ran outside to the car and handed Damian a bag full of pastries.

"Consider this an apology for making you freak out so much."

He nodded and took the bag but still told her "You're an idiot you know right?"

"Haha. Or so I've been told." She shrugs. "See you tomorrow in class if you're not too traumatized!"

"Tt. We live in Gotham. It's gonna take more than that to truly scar me. Although I have to say, that's the closest someone's gotten in a long time. Don't do it again."

"No promises!" Marinette yells as the limo drives off.

That night Damian got a nightmare filled with shoes.

Marinette is now known and feared throughout the more amateur criminal community.

True to her word, Marinette tried to reduce the amount of risky choices that she took.

I mean, there was that incident with the llamas, trumpets, and skateboards but we don't talk about that.

Her safety streak ended when Damian was kidnapped.

And by the Joker no less.

Ya, no.

She's not just gonna stand by while her friend litteraly gets kidnapped by a clown man thing when she could do something about it.

The Joker called the Waynes through a video chat and threatens the dump Damian into a pool filled with unidentified and possibly contaminated water until they give him half a million dollars.

And because it's a two way video chat and all of the Waynes (except Damian) are there they can't 'call the batfam' to save him.

Because they were all so busy panicking and Joker was busy laughing, no one but Damian noticed a dark silhouette sneaking around in the shadows.

The moment he saw them he immediately knew who it was.

'Oh no. ThaT'S MY IDIOT!!'

Marinette noticed Damian's panicked stare on her and just, gave him a thumbs up? Before going back into the darkness.

'Oh no oh no ohnoohnononono what's she doing?!' He thought to himself as he heard quiet shuffling in the shadows.

Going back to the screen, Bruce was about to send the money when all of a sudden a bright light was turned on from behind the Joker to the left.

And they weren't expecting what they saw.

There under the light was someone in a Barney the Dinosaur costume sitting in a rainbow bumper car with a radio and a bag filled with something strapped in the passenger side.

TrULy RaDiAnT.

The purple dino turned on the radio, (which was playing the Barney theme song) made eye contact with the clown, and promptly said "Beep beep bitch." in a robotic voice (there was a voice changer in the costume) before driving full speed at him.

At first the Joker tried to run away from the vehicle but for some reason the bumper car was extremely fast and RAN HIM OVER before turning around,

AND FUCKING DOING IT AGAIN!!

Double oof.

They did this around 12 times before the Joker managed to push up from under the bumper car at the perfect time.

Marinette did a backflip (dramatics are guaranteed) as she jumped out of the rainbow ride while simultaneously throwing the radio at the Joker at full force.

The Joker, not expecting that, was thrown against the base of a wall.

He got up just in time to see his attacker pull out a shoe from the bag and chuck it at his nuts.

*cue everyone either laughing at his pain or wincing in sympathy*

The Barney pulls out a sandal from the bag and throws it at his face and uses a black stiletto to pin the clown's arm tO THE FRIGGING WALL when he reaches to touch where the flip flop hit him.

(Is there a difference between sandals and flip flops?)

She then uses another stiletto (a red one this time) to pin his other arm and pulls out YET ANOTHER SHOE (a rainboot) to hit his face.

...again....

This time he gets knocked out though so there's that.

...

....

.....

The power of FOOTWEAR!!

The purple and green dinosaur goes to untie Damian while his family just watch through the screen with their jaws on the floor, still processing what the actual heck just happened.

They get snapped out of their shock when the youngest Wayne launches himself into the Barney's arms and starts rambling about how worried he was and did the store owner give you all those shoes and why the heck did you follow me here.

They don't know what they were expecting the person under the Barney costume to look like but they definitely weren't expecting a young girl with pigtails wearing stilts to come out.

Apparently she needed them to fit into the suit.

Damian: How did you even know I was in trouble?

Marinette: I sorta have a six sense for this kind of stuff. It's disappointing that I didn't get to use all of my amo though :(

Damian: Wait. You brought MORE shoes?

Marinette: Yep! And a couple other things as well. Like this trumpet case, and this bowling ball, and this duck themed alarm clock (I have one lol), and oh! Wait a moment would ya?

*walks over to the pool and dumps around 30 bath bombs in*

Marinette: There! Now this place will smell super nice!

Damian: Did you just dump a ton of bath bombs into a pool of unidentified liquid?

Marinette: Yep!

Damian: Let me rephrase that. Did you just dump a ton of bath bombs into a pool of possibly chemically contaminated water which could possibly have a bad reaction to the bath bombs which could possibly explode or just generally be the death of us?

Marinette: ........

Damian: ........

Marinette: ......

Damian: ........

Marinette: ....well it wouldn't be the FIRST time I-

Damian close to tears: yEs I KnOw PLeaSe StOp ReMinDiNg mE.

Ya so this was just a random idea I had and that I will probably not be adding to but y'all reading this are more than welcome to! If you do continue or make your own little spins on this please tag me! I would love to read them :D

[hotontopnow]

Whos the mother in How I Met Your Mother: The Ultimate Guide

How I Met Your Mother is one of the most popular sitcoms of all time because of its clever writing, likeable characters, and many references to pop culture. But who the mother is has always been one of the biggest mysteries of the show. During the nine seasons of the show, Josh Radnor's character, Ted Mosby, told his kids how he met their mother, but we never saw her until the very end. If you're a fan of the show, you may have been left scratching your head and wondering, "Who's the mother in How I Met Your Mother?" Well, wonder no more! We'll tell you everything you need to know about the mysterious mother, from who she is to how she affects the show, in this complete guide. H1: How to Find the Mother The mother's name was one of the biggest mysteries of How I Met Your Mother. During the nine seasons of the show, Ted went through a lot of relationships, but we didn't get to meet his mother until the very end. So, in How I Met Your Mother, who is the mother? Her name is Tracy McConnell, and Cristin Milioti played her. In the last season of the show, Tracy showed up, and it didn't take long for us to find out that she was Ted's true love. H2: How the Mother Came to Be Known Even though we didn't meet the mother until the last season of the show, we could feel her presence the whole time. In fact, we were given numerous hints about her identity, including: In the first season, Ted meets a stripper named Tracy, who he thinks might be the mother. But we found out later that this was just a false lead. In season eight, there's a flash-forward to Barney's wedding, where we see the bride's foot, which is wearing the same boots that the mother wears in the last season. In the episode "Bass Player Wanted," the mother plays bass at a wedding, but we don't get a good look at her face. H2: How the Mother Changed the Show The mother had a huge impact on How I Met Your Mother, despite the fact that we didn't get to meet her until the very end. Here are some of the ways she changed the show: Ted told his children the story of how he met their mother because it was about her. The mother brought out the best in Ted, and helped him to become the person he was meant to be. The mother's death, which was shown in the last episode, was a big part of the story and tied the whole series together. FAQs: When did the show first talk about the mother? How I Met Your Mother's first episode, which aired in 2005, was the first time the mother was mentioned. In the first scene, Josh Radnor, who plays Ted Mosby, tells his kids that he is going to tell them how he met their mother. Did the people who made the show know from the start who the mother would be? Yes, Carter Bays and Craig Thomas, who made the show, knew from the start who the mother would be. But they didn't find out who she was until the last season. Was the cast kept in the dark about who the mother was? No, the How I Met Your Mother cast already knew who the mother was before the last season. Cristin Milioti was cast as the mother in season 8, but her scenes were shot in secret so as not to give anything away. Why did it take so long to find out who the mum was? The people who made the show wanted to take their time telling the story of how Ted met the mother and let the characters grow. They also wanted to keep people guessing and build up tension. How did the fans react when they found out who the mother was? The reactions to finding out who the mother was were mixed. Some fans were excited that Cristin Milioti was cast and loved her character, while others thought that the show had kept the mother's identity a secret for too long and were disappointed when it was finally revealed. Why was the end of the show a big deal? The ending of the show was controversial because it showed that the mother had died of an illness and that Ted had been telling his kids the story to get their permission to date their Aunt Robin (played by Cobie Smulders). Many fans thought that this twist went against the main idea of the show and were upset with how the story ended. Was there a hint earlier in the show that the mother would die? Yes, there were many clues and hints in the show that pointed to the mother's death. In season 6, Ted tells his kids, "Sometimes in life, you meet someone who is meant to change you." In the last season, it turns out that he was talking about his mother, but she had died before she could change him. Did the people who made the show know that people would not like how it ended? Yes, the people who made the show were aware that the ending would be controversial and that some fans would be upset. In fact, they filmed a different ending in which Ted and the mother live happily ever after, just in case they wanted to use it instead. Did finding out who the mother was affect how many people watched the show? The reveal of the mother's name didn't have a big effect on how many people watched the show. In fact, one of the most popular seasons of How I Met Your Mother was the last one. Will there ever be a spin-off or continuation of How I Met Your Mother? There have been rumours that How I Met Your Mother might get a spin-off or continue, but nothing has been confirmed. But a spin-off called "How I Met Your Father" is in the works. It will follow a new group of characters as they look for love. In the end, the mother was a very important character on How I Met Your Mother, even though she didn't show up until the very end. For nine seasons, nobody knew who she was, but when she finally showed up, she was worth the wait. Ted Mosby's love, Tracy McConnell, was played by Cristin Milioti. Her presence was felt throughout the series. She helped Ted become the person he was meant to be by bringing out the best in him. Even though the show's ending was controversial, one thing is for sure: How I Met Your Mother fans will always love the mother. So, the next time you wonder, "Who is the mother in How I Met Your Mother?" Don't forget that Tracy McConnell was the woman who won Ted's heart and made his search for true love complete. Read the full article