#HOW AM I NOT EVEN HALFWAY FINISHED
Text
it’s making me crazy that deliverer has the same structure as foreigner but mirrored + with cajeiri in bren’s role (swapping in bren for tabini and thus making him cajeiri’s father figure… aww). like it’s not a particularly sophisticated feat (the actually impressive part is that the whole arc of books 1 through 9 follows the same plot as 1 as well—i’m nursing a confusing notes app bulleted list on this, which i want to make into something somewhat coherent) but it does really get you when an author goes “wow it’s so fucked up that this happened to a grown man. what if it also happened to an elementary schooler?”
#foreigner blogging#bren is so funny as a single alien dad bc he has a partner but jago is definitely not the mom so he’s still a single dad#🧐 actually now i’m mad again that the mommy issues plotline got dropped and will never come up again probably. it would be so juicy here#HOW AM I NOT EVEN HALFWAY FINISHED
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
why did my teachers think it was okay to give us like one single weekend to finish all of our midterm projects and study for our tests.
#slight vent#i have 3 projects and 3 tests#i’m halfway through my lit/history project and halfway through my psych project#and maybe a quarter done with my programming project#which is fucking insane btw cause how tf am i supposed to code a whole video game in like 3 days on top of everything else 😭😭😭#and some things he hasn’t taught us and just thinks that we should just be able to figure out like HELLO???/?///#I DONT HAVE TIME TO TEACH MYSELF NEW CODE#ITS THE MIDTERM/FINAL FOR THE CLASS??????#and once the weekend starts i’ll have no one to trouble shoot my stuff and fix my bugs so literally i’ll be hopeless so 😭😭😭#my calc teacher JUST finished teaching us everything we need for the midterm TODAY. THE MIDTERM IS ON WEDNESDAY. BRO.#my physics teacher doesn’t let us copy down any of our idk test questions or take our old assessments home to study#*old#so we get to look em over for like 20 mins and hand em back. which doesn’t exact fucking help me when i’m studying for the midterm.#WITH NO STUDY GUIDE.#my teachers even said that this years midterms are worse than previous years cause they’re all in a row instead of split by a weekend#we’ve had 2 delayed openings and 1 early dismissal this week which means we have less time to work on our midterm projects in class 😭😭😭😭#i’m so overwhelmed i’m gonna explode#by the time i finish these projects i’m not gonna have anymore energy/time to study for my tests. WHICH IS THE HARD SHIT BTW.
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
...
#its sort of funny. i think my medication is working pretty well. i feel stable in a way i never really have before#is it the dopamine stablizer or is it my ion channels? whos to say. it doesn't matter. but it also doesnt change some things#the ways i think and react negativly to change. but it makes it easier to deal with. i still experience this strange dispaire on the#weekends or anytime im not working. i think the oddest thing is thst i dont think ive ever been this consistenly sad#not in a depressed sort of way. just a passing thoughts make me tear up sort of way. it doesnt feel out of control. it just feels like a#prelude to grief i guess. bc my mum is still in the hospital and its so hard to kno what that means from halfway across the country#my sisters are both home right now. they both live within 3hrs of where we grew up. one sister lives in the city my mom goes to for#treatment. so they have the opportunity to see her more than me. i dunno if they do tho. we dont really talk. i dont kno if they're as sad#as i am. if im overreacting bc i cant physically see what's happening. what the feeling is in the room. not that she would probably complain#shes the suffer in silence type. my dad keeps texting us pics of our shitty lil sunroom that hes redoing#to make my mum a lil sanctuary. he must be sad too. its his wife. hes staying with her in the hospital rn. i dunno its so weird#when i talk to my counselor she assumes i find out info thru calls or talk to my sisters abt it and i gotta b like nah we dont really talk#i get my info thru text. i havent talked to my parents on the phone in like a month. i dunno we just dont talk. so i dont kno how to reach#out and be like yo so whats up? shoulf i plan on coming home this summer for a bit?? like???#this is the disadvantage of leaving thr place where you grew up. probably when i finish my phd i should move closer to home#somewhere in the Appalachian mountains maybe. somewere in the eastern deciduous forrest. somewhere with thunderstorms.#but thats years from now. who knows what ill b doing. for now im just sad and tired and i dont quite kno what to do in the short or long#term bc im feeling the weight of my mental limitations rather intensely. but maybe im just being self limiting#whatever. i dont have a dead mum yet. shes not even on hospice care. things are just uncertain and dont look so hot#i just dont see how it can get better from here when chemo gave her secondary blood cancer and shes still full of tumors#i dont think im being that dramatic. it just objectively seems not great for survival#unrelated
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
there really was no plan when it came to this oneshot and its word count because tell me how im only just starting writing out the start of page 2 of the oneshot outline and im about to break 3k words
#mocha's journal#im not even Done finishing the ones on the first page. im not even halfway to the plot at all#how am i already about to break 3k words. i am so sorry ayamura nation i cant stop fucking Yapping !
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
the next chapter is all about empire~☆
(and it's going to be LATE :'^) i will do my best to get the inks done by the end of the month but that's the best i can hope for orz;;; )
#/lying on the floor#it's 33 pages long and coda is on ONE OF THEM#wait i already said this in another post :''''^)#i haven't even gotten to the super violent part..... i am about halfway finished though. :v#at one point i was like what if i do nanowrimo at the same time and write a script for smbca#L. M. A. O. :^)#DO YOU EVER JUST NEED TO READ A WEBCOMIC YOU HAVEN'T DRAWN YET???? |D;;;#smbca is also violent.... my childhood friends to enemies with benefits bl fantasy epic :v#idk how i want it to end yet... either they kill each other#live happily ever after#or it's literally the end of the fight club movie#(i mean i want it to be that last one but someone has already made the fight club movie)
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#hhhhhh reread the flashback chapter i wrote w d/dirk and just hooh boy i love it so much ugh#im tempted to post it on its own but i want to save that bomb of a scene for the middle of the larger fic its in#just ughhhhhhh i love everything about how i wrote d#im going nuts bc i have been working on it since like december? ish? but the past couple months have been hell for me personally#fuck like i remember going thru an entire calendar of movie release dates for that historical year and found the perfect spot#to where it accounts for historical events and events in canon and has its own special date and how the release of the movie...#...effects how d managed to make it a success and just#fuck man i researched the hell out of that and only had to put one anachronism to grease a moment in it#like#this fic is so big for me and i am so scared that i wont finish it bc i have so many things planned out for it and so many ...#...annotations i keep adding to modify things i wrote earlier in it (which is why im not publishing any of it yet)#i want to share it w the world so fucking badly but i keep getting amazing ideas to weave in from an earlier point i already wrote#cries lol#ughhh this is why im so tempted to post the flashback as a standalone chapter/separate posting#but#i wrote it to match a scene from both the previous and next chapter so i dont wanna ruin that either#fucking writers block man ahhhh wish my life wasnt shit rn bc i need to finish it#tag edit: i used the wrong spelling of affects earlier lol#but yeah ughhhh so frustrated w life rn i have such bigger problems going on rn but#rereading my fave chapter kinda just made my day at least lmao#personal#vent#kinda i guess#delete later / /#maybe idk lol#ShitPost.exe#like this wip is over 33k words and its probably not even halfway done in terms of event points i want to happen in it lmao fml#all bc i wanted to make one punchline happen which happened a long time ago before i wanted to write all that backstory into the fic
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
national bf day on twitter that means i get legal rights to finish my cringe masadai fic where daigo meets masato's dad(s)
#masadai#snap chats#casually trying to ignore the casual transphobia i overheard today hi guys <3#no my day was so nice. before that. there was a nerf archery event and im really surprised my wrist wasnt being a fool#i actually forgot my wrist was fucked up when i went there but when i went to shoot I Immediately Remembered#but over the course of the like. two hours i didnt even notice anymore and i was shooting like how i did back then#sooo Unwarranted Wrist Update we're SOOOO back... had so much fun it was crazy LOL#oh yeah. the post. let me cook hang on put the tomato down#i AM writing a sequel to that cringe masadai fic i did last year and i was writing it this morning. i didnt even know it was bf day#its a sign i oughta finish it...... im like halfway through it maybe i can actually finish something for once#idk it depends on the vibe im trying to go for im still fighting myself on it but we'll get there. i hope#i have like two hours before class but we always do fuck all there SOOOOOOOO <- is insane#ok bye <3 reminder to be happy for your trans friends when they transition <3 if you dont you oughta fall down some stairs <3
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Imma be honest for a second—I don’t think I want a black and white remake for the switch. I just want to experience it for the first time again
#meows#black and white means a lot to me#first pokemon game I was allowed to have#I mean idk maybe pokemon will surprise me!#maybe it’ll be a continuation of the story!#i haven’t finished (meaning I haven’t defeated the league)#any Pokémon game since I think sun and moon#the furthest I’ve gotten on the switch games#is with Sword and Shield. but even then I’m maybe halfway#how much of it is how busy I am nowadays#how much of it is depression?#and how much is actually to blame on the games themselves?#I still love Pokémon with all my heart don’t misunderstand me#I just. wish I could fall in love again
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
trying really hard to apply the idea of Make Bad Art to amigurumi
the problem is that it's hammered in really hard that you Absolutely Cannot let Any filling show through, and keeping that kinda tension completely destroys my hands. like to the point where i haven't been able to do anything for the past week and i Know my current amigurumi project is partly to blame for that bc it has been Exhausting
but i wanna make things. and in this case it means i gotta make them badly
#rip current project youre gonna get tension switched halfway through#at least its assembled from pieces so#im gonna finish the current piece someday with tight tension#and then loosen up for the rest#and just deal with how it ends up looking#chatter tag#'oh just go down a hook size then!' if i go down another hook size the yarn literally wont stay on the hook anymore#i was not made to crochet aran weight yarn with a 3mm hook. i am not doing that#i have a love-hate relationship with amigurumi but my current project is so cute and i want it to exist#i have both my current projects just sitting on my desk and theyre haunting me#even when my hands recover i wont be able to work on them bc i need to catch up on homework :(#this is mainly me trying to untangle my thoughts tbh#(other current project is a shawl with very gay motivations behind it)
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fun fact: The fairy tale flash fiction has now passed 4,000 words.
#i'm okay talking about it because i'm going to finish this thing if it kills me#it nearly has#you don't know how i've agonized over those opening scenes#writing and then rewriting and then cutting almost everything of it#i gave up months ago before finally getting inspiration or at least motivation to just push through#i've now reached roughly the halfway point#maybe 3/4#and i am embarrassed by a lot of it but also at least i have something that sort of a little bit flows#i want to finish the ask game stories before starting on the four loves challenge#the trouble is that i love tattercoats as a story so much that i'm aiming for a more detailed retelling than i might otherwise#it's still bare bones because i'm a hack who can't write description#but it's going to sit in a weird middle ground of being too long to be satisfying short fiction and too short to count as a full retelling#i've got one speech that i love#a few images or moments that i'm okay with#and the rest is just scaffolding that hopefully keeps the story from collapsing even if it isn't pretty#all duct-taped together with sentiment#i had hoped to get a first draft done tonight but since that ain't happening there's no chance it's getting done this week#but at least i'm further in than i've ever been before#and making good use of scene breaks so this section feels more doable than it ever has#if i can just get them to the palace it'll be relatively smooth sailing#here's hoping i can keep from overagonizing and just get a draft down that i can edit later#it hasn't happened yet during this draft but one can hope#(which is rather a prominent theme in the story actually)#adventures in writing
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
i think i want to try playing three houses again,,, hopefully i can finish it this time
#im SO bad at finishing games even ones i rlly like#like i will play a game for a few days and rlly enjoy it and then i wont play it for a year#literally i still havent finished pkmn sv im like barely halfway thru it#i dont know if its an adhd thing or what but thats just how i am#ive always been like that#thats why i like so many shorter easier games#even when i ADORE a game from the minute i play it i just always bounce off it in a week or two#hhhhhhhh#its rlly frustrating being me sometimes
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
expect two joe n fcg drawings soon-ish. Have one in the works from last week + gotta start on a new one for this week
#cr#cr c3#crc3#fcg#family emergency made it so i couldnt finish the one from last week#but its halfway through the shading phase so it should be done either today or tomorrow#depends on how tired I get lmao#art college wont stop me from grinding the ship art#I am going down with this ship#even if im the only one onboard
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
...
#Jesus. just finished my interview. no idea how it went#i think it was much too rambling on my part and they asked almost exclusively sciency questions#ugh hopefully i didn't look like a completle moron. the guy was sorta inscrutable so no idea what he thought#and he was like hmm whats ur competition here? and i dont give a fuck abt competition and also it doesnt really matter#fuck. i should have said. it would b fine if they were doing the exact same project bc we would b evolving different strains and it would b#interesting if they evolved even the exact same traits. fuck#i think objectively i probably looked like someone who halfway knows what theyre doing without the specific knowledge#which is exactly true. like mother fuckers ive got a full time job to be overworked in. i dont have time to memorize details of every#pathway change in every desert cyano#uuuuugh its just annoying bc my brain doesnt work well in the moment. i need time to process and knit together an answer#so i wouldnt b surprised if i was ranked low. oh god i was told the interview was prob a formality unless it goes terribly#itll b real embarrassing if i dont get passed this stage now#whatever it was a bit chaotic on their end too bc one guy didnt show up until halfway thru so i kinda had to go back and say things twice#uuuuuuuuuuggh. well that kinda sucked. at least its done. out of my hands now.#i was getting too excited abt it anyway. this will reaffirm my: obviously im not gonna get it vibes#i mean thats what i get for trying to join a very competitive program. like i am not a competitive person#rip to my lab mate who im gonna whine at all day abt this. i have to meet him in less than an hour#welp. there r other schools. god i hope at least one of them accepts me#ugh i just think its kinda annoying they they want u to be perfectly qualified for things lol. like i would need someone to step thru the#lab process with me literally once or twice and then id be good to go#like maybe a couple hours of someones time to remind me. thats it. humans r adaptable#i can obviously carry out a project to its conclusion and i have a lot of passion. not that they asked. but yeah#oh well. i should have breakfast before i freeze in the desert all day#unrelated
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Current Status:
Taking turns smiling soppily at my screen and full-on gross-sobbing while watching UWMA for the first time ❤️😭
Random 3rd mood: wanting to strangle Alex (like. dude. get a clue. back tf off. 😒 <- judgy face)
#until we meet again#to think I very likely would never have watched this if it wasn't for between us#I didn't plan to up until halfway through the first episode of between us#but then I needed to look up some context and got curious#and I rewatched bu ep1 again after finishing uwma ep5 and god so many things hit so much differently with all the added context#I wish it was physically possible to watch these episodes faster#I have no idea how people waited for these episodes week after week after week back then#I would have gone insane#why do I have to be bound by the laws of nature#I want to savour every second but also make time move faster so I can watch it all in one go#started watching yesterday and am about halfway through now and very much in love with this show 🥺😭#my god the layers of this show#the plot is starting to thicken even further#I'm eating up every little crumb#it's nice to see teamwin embedded in the story and not just in their supercut#especially since there are so many small moments that weren't in there#I'm living for the squad's friendship#I love how savage pharm can be with the most innocent expression on his face (yes this is about him epically burning alex)#I love how ready team is to throw hands for pharm to get the creep to back off#del is a beautiful angel#and I also love the two cooking club girls#sin is really cute but I also can never stop staring at his hair wondering if it's real or not#sorn is a lot more likeable than kinn's crazy ex (hopefully it'll stay that way 🙈)#now I kinda want somebody to pull a tankhun and smack alex over the head with a tray every time he overstays his non-existent welcome#'if you make him sad I'mma steal him from you' - dude he rejected you like three times already#really like the music in this show too#and inkorn constantly make my heart ache 😭#they could have run these two stories parallel to each other and only brought in that scene from ep.1-1 much later as a twist with thorns#but I preferred getting stabbed immediately and only then having the gaps of the past filled in as well as getting healed in the present#bit scared of possible angst yet to come but I can take it; I'm still not over how good this show is so far 😭
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Guess what, I've worked what probably amounts to half of my total hours, in one fucking month. My store is resting on my shoulders, it seems, and boy do I feel that. I have not had a moment's rest since my vacation, and uh, it's probably not sustainable? Maybe?
Anyway. Guess who's going to be travelling for hours on end and then arrive just a day before a mandatory University lecture? It's me!
#text_loke#i'm also curious what my boss is going to say when he gets back. and looks at my nightmare hours#because uh. i've worked. wayyyy too much these last few months#and i am. halfway. tempted to make a little bit of a racket to the higher ups to argue my way for a higher percentage position#because i have not worked 20% in a WHILE. gimme my 40% because i for damn sure have earned it#i also. somehow. need to squeeze in the time to read the books for my Masters. because uh. i'm also doing that#can you tell i'm living by a thread rn? my sister legit just moved out yesterday and i have NOT had time to process that#i still don't have time! i won't have time!#so i shall grin and bear it as i always do!#ahjshdd legit tho. yesterday i had barely had anything to eat due to my schedule being PACKED#i woke up after five hours of sleep finished the postbox for my sister RAN out the door for Uni at 11. and when done at Uni went work#my coworker thought me insane yesterday for bouncing on my feet with barely any food in my body. or sleep#however. it's just how i am. i can just. grin and go on with my day and function when my body is Barely Responding#i will just. not be quite intelligent because my brain is Slow#also. i was NOT happy being one hour extra at work today. like it WAS worth it and i did it freely#but also i wanted to go home. but. closing shift needed my help and i had to make sure everything was ok before i left#however. i have. so much bullshit i must do tomorrow. fuck#anyway. if y'all are curious as to where i've been these last few months. my answer is dying (work and uni). i am perished#i have barely any time for myself anymore. i'm not mad about it or anything. not even like. burnt out (knock on wood)#however. i do feel the toll. i do wish i could just. do fun things again. hopefully when uni properly starts and i go to my ACTUAL CONTRACT#i can then finally relax. right now however. not so much#hopefully they won't need me next week tho. because i cannot. at all#anyway. if i didn't already know i was a workaholic i sure do now!
0 notes
Text
girl i need to calm the fuck down jesus christ
#the hyperfixation's been ebbing and flowing and tonight it's decided to make me feel like there are worms in my chest#but that could be because of the It's Literally 2 AM and i just ate jelly donuts and infodumped to a friend#the drafts are fine the drafts are spectacular the drafts are- actually i can't tell how unwell these drafts read as#TERRIFIED of finishing them and they're not even halfway done so i think my wordcount can be attributed mostly to avoiding the finish line#i have an ending planned though i've written the ending out already. the beginning too#middle parts are ehhh but i also know what's supposed to happen in them and they're pretty fleshed out#i have a million tabs open rn i should go look at those instead#the way my adhd has been working these days is i open a million pointless tabs of pointless distractions and then my brain goes no actually#let's be quirky and cute. do you want to be a special kind of productive instead#kalat#roomba rambles#roomba writes
0 notes
Last Seen Blogs
cryptic-clairvoyant
breathe
becketthyni598
The expert hunting and fishing channel 8169
alejandro97100
4dad
weebattlewest-blog
Untitled
ruby-safire-blog
Vie d'adoe