#HE LOOKS LIKE THE PRETTIEST KING ALIVE AND I WOULD SWEAR ON MY LIFE TO PROTECT HIM FROM ANYONE WHO WOULD DARE TO HURT HIM I WOULD BECOME ONE
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idunnowhattowriteheretbh · 3 months ago
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YOOOOOOO THIS LOOKS SICK AF
@myhandshurts HOMIE LOOK AT THIS *POINTS FRANTICALLY*
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Cruel King and Griefer!
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i-put-the-leg-in-legolas · 4 years ago
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Promise me- Legolas x Reader
Triggers: Insecurity about oneself, a LOT of crying
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Summary: (Y/n), stricken by grief, lets her emotions loose, but Legolas doesn’t hesitate to comfort her and remind her how much she means to him.
❈❈❈❈❈❈❈❈❈❈❈
The crisp, autumn air hit (Y/n)'s face, causing the warm tears that were now rolling down her cheeks to dry. But even though those tears dried, it wasn't long until more took their place. Truth to be told, the girl was exhausted. Both physically and mentally.
Though they'd started as 10, the Fellowship, which she was part of, had now been broken down and reduced to 4. Boromir had died in the hands of orcs, Frodo and Sam had gone off to god-knows-where, Gandalf had sacrificed himself to save them from Balrog, and Merry and Pippin, the sweet little hobbits that made the seemingly endless adventure less insufferable, had been taken by orcs.
Now, she found herself crying while her back resting against the trunk of a tree and her chin resting on her knees. The remaining members of the Fellowship were at least 10 feet away from her, all fast asleep as the warmth of the fire kept them warm and protected from the cold. She thought about their situation, about where the four little hobbits were, and whether they were alive or not, and this only made her sob even harder.
Between her soft whimpers and her heaving, the rustling of leaves could be heard, but (Y/n) didn't pay it any mind, instead focusing on the thoughts that swarmed her head and made her heart ache. The soft sound of crunching leaves got closer and closer, and without her even noticing it, in a matter of seconds, a certain blond was standing in front of her.
"(Y/n)?" Legolas murmured in a soft tone. Upon not receiving anything other than a soft whimper as a response, the elf kneeled beside the (h/c) haired girl and placed a hand on her shoulder. "(Y/n), look at me... what's wrong, nîn tinu?"
Legolas's soft words only made the girl turn away from him, mumbling inaudible 'leave me alone's and 'go away's. The elf sighed at this and sat down beside her, gently holding her cheek with his pale hand and moving her face; so she was facing him. 
(Y/n)'s cheeks and nose were red, and so were her eyes. Legolas couldn't help but let his face soften as he noticed the state the woman he fancied was in. (Y/n) noticed the change in the elf's expression and immediately looked away, too embarrassed for him to see her in that state. 
"Don't look away from me, nîn bain, tell me what's on your mind," Legolas cooed, gently taking hold of (Y/n)'s both cheeks. As his fingertips caressed the soft, damp skin of her lips, the girl let out a sigh and lightly nuzzled her face into the elf's hands.
"I'm just worried, Leggy... what if the hobbits don't make it to Mountain Doom? And-and what if we never find Merry and Pippin? Or even worse, what if we find them when it's too late?" (Y/n) lamented. She'd tried to keep her weeping quiet earlier, but now, it had all become too much for her to handle. Legolas's soft palms on her face made her completely break down, and before she knew it, she was wailing.
Though slightly taken aback, Legolas immediately wrapped his arms around her and gently helped her to her feet. "Come on... we don't want the others to wake up," he murmured, planting a soft kiss on top of the girl's hair as he slowly walked her away from their sleeping companions.
After a few minutes, they got to a small clearing, and there, Legolas sat down on the ground and pulled (Y/n) into his lap. "I know you're scared, meleth... but trust me, I know this will all work out in the end," Legolas soothed, running his fingers through the girl's tangled locks.
"How?" (Y/n) questioned, "How can you possibly say that it will all work out in the end? We've already lost two members of the fellowship, orcs kidnapped the other two, and we don't know if Frodo and Sam are even alive, for Valar's sake!"
Though he was slightly fazed by (Y/n)'s outburst, Legolas held the girl even closer, letting her sob on his chest and weakly bang her fists against his back. "This isn't fair! Why didn't take me instead, Legolas?! why?!" the girl wailed.
"Gandalf could've helped so many people, and-and Sam! He wanted to get married and have a family, and Merry and Pippin... they were so young, Legolas, they still had so much to live for, so many experiences they hadn't, well, experienced yet! How could I forget Boromit... he would've been such a great king, he would've been a magnificent ruler!" (Y/n) cried.
"And Frodo... he had so much potential, he was smart, and-and such a great person..." after uttering those words, (Y/n) sighed and looked up at Legolas, who held her tightly in his arms, gently tucking a strand of her behind his ear before wiping away her tears.
"What I'm saying is... I think that it's unfair that they all went away instead of me... I mean, let's face it, Legolas. I'm just a healer! I'm not the heir to a throne, like Aragorn, or-or a prince like you," (Y/n) said, looking down at her lap. "And if I died, nobody would care... I don't have a family that would mourn me like the rest of you do..."
Legolas gasped at the girl's statement and immediately shook his head before looking down at her with a serious expression. "Don't ever say that, (Y/n)! You're worth just as much as everyone else in these fellowship, and I know you deny it, but you're extraordinary!" the elf stated, "You're beautiful, smart, and such a gentle soul... and I swear to Valar that if you ever left my mind, I'd go crazy, (Y/n)... my life has no meaning without you..."
Legolas's words only made (Y/n) tear up more, but between sobs, she managed to pull away from Legolas and tried to walk away, only for him to follow her, refusing to let go of her hand. "Stop this, Legolas! Stop it!" she shouted, snatching her hand away from the elf's grasp.
"Stop what, (Y/n)? All I want to do is help you, nîn meleth! I can't stand seeing you like this!" Legolas groaned, running a hand through his hair in frustration. Yes, he loved (Y/n) dearly, but he wasn't the best with emotions, and it frustrated him to see her that way and know that there possibly was no way he could help her.
"Stop giving me false hopes, making all those promises about how we'll start courting when all of this ends! Stop making me feel like the star of your eyes, Legolas!" (Y/n) bellowed, tears from anger and sorrow now soaking her cheeks. "If we make it out alive of this, you're just going to go off to your kingdom and find a beautiful elven maiden, I know it! Why would you want to stay with me, either way?! I'm not as slender and pretty as the elves, and I'm not even immortal like you are! I'm not the prettiest woman in Middle Earth, Legolas... hell, I'm not even close to being the prettiest of humans..."
Though throughout the whole ordeal Legolas tried his hardest to keep his emotions at bay, he couldn't help but shed a tear at (Y/n)'s words. He found it unimaginable how someone like her, someone so beautiful both inside and out, could think that she wasn't worthy of his love. In any case, it was he who was not worthy of her love.
By now, (Y/n) had fallen to her knees and was weakly crying into her hands. She'd almost ran out of tears, so she just heaved and desperately gasped for air, her chest aching with every dry sob that left her mouth. It was a tragic sight, to say the least.
"(Y/n), listen to me... my life has no meaning without you, and if I had to choose between enduring a painful and slow death but being able to spend the little time I have with you, or living forever without you by my side, I'd choose the first option without a doubt," Legolas sniffled, slowly approaching (Y/n) and gently rubbing her back. 
At first, the girl tried to resist the elf's caresses, but he didn't budge, so (Y/n) slowly leaned against his touch, her crying starting to mellow. "If I could, I'd take down all the stars in the sky and gift them to you... it would be unnecessary as your beauty surpasses that of every star, but if you wanted me to, I'd do it... I'd do anything for my queen, nîn meleth..."
(Y/n) turned around and tightly wrapped her arms around Legolas's neck, nuzzling her head on the crook of his neck. Her raggedy breath tickled the elf's neck, but he didn't care. Instead, he focused on whispering sweet and loving words into the girl's ear.
"I will always be here for you, no matter the situation, nîn tinu..." Legolas softly cooed, gently moving the healer's face, so she was facing him. (Y/n) looked like a complete mess, but in Legolas's eyes, she looked angelical as always. "Promise me something..." the elf whispered, tenderly leaning his forehead against (Y/N)'s.
"For you, Leggy, anything..." (Y/n) breathily said, sweetly brushing her fingertips against Legolas's nape.
"Please promise me that you'll never forget that I'll always be there for you. Even if life takes a cruel and unexpected turn and makes us part, I'll find a way to find you, and I'll never rest until I do it. After all, you're I Ithil ned nîn fuin, nîn maethor... you make my life worth living, (Y/n)..."
"Oh, Legolas... gen melin, nîn cundu..." (Y/n) whispered, staring into Legolas's cerulean eyes. As she stared into the prince's, she didn't see anything other than genuine love and admiration. For once in her life, she realized that maybe, just maybe, she wasn't as unattractive or boring as she thought. Legolas's eyes and words were so convincing that for the first time in her life, she felt like she belonged, she felt like she was valued. Maybe the prince's words, which she had brushed off as lies for so long, were the truth.
"I love you too, my queen... I adore you with my whole being."
Elvish Translations
Nin tinu- my star
Nin bain- my beautiful
Meleth- love
I Ithil ned nîn fuin- the moon in my night
Nîn maethor- my warrior
Gen melin- I love you
Nîn cundu- my prince
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no-error · 5 years ago
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Fantasy Klance Ficrec
Finally new list for fic recs. Hope ya all enjoy these awesome fics. :)
Remember check out tags!
Of Wolves and Wisps
Lance knows not to seek with his mind in the woods. The fae have a habit of twisting the desires sought by those who chase after the wisps. But when given no other choice, Lance makes the decision to alter his path. To change his fate.
He should have known, really, how things would turn out.
Never call out to wolves. One may just answer.
Words: 145,585 AO3
The Criminal Witch and His Knight of a Husband
Series
Under the rule of an unjust king, witches not employed by the crown had become illegal in the kingdom of Altea. Not wanting to work for a filthy murderer of a man, Lance spitefully refused to get his certification at the normal age of sixteen. But that was over half a decade ago. Altea is now ruled by the beautiful and reasonable Queen Allura, and Lance finds himself happily married to her head knight, despite his fugitive status.
Lance struggles with helping hot headed, prone to danger Keith stay alive, while simultaneously keeping his ability to cast spells a secret. He can't have him figuring anything out. After all, the last thing he wants is for his own husband to arrest him.
Words: 80,309 AO3
Star Cursed
A Dragon familiar is the last thing Lance expects to summon when he graduates lowest in the class at the Magerium. All he wants to do is summon a toad or a cat and get to work, but summoning a High Magic creature like a Dragon is something no one has done in hundreds of years. The Dragon, named Keith (why, WHY is he named Keith), is trained to be a familiar for the most powerful of mages.
Unluckily for him, Lance is assigned the task of lesser potions master. Lance has to navigate a precarious balance of grumpy-Dragon-with-nothing-to-do on top of his workload of boring tasks. That’s when he isn’t enduring the ridicule of the other students, who believe him to be “Star Cursed.” To make matters worse, discontent in the Magerium is brewing and it might mean danger for all High Magic creatures, which currently includes one Dragon named Keith
Words: 152,239 AO3
fit the crown to my head
“What’s the fun in a masquerade if you don’t flirt outrageously with the prettiest person in the room?” the young man says flippantly, and then winks at Keith. Keith huffs a laugh, amused.
“You keep saying things like that, but you haven’t seen my face,” he says, gesturing to his mask. “I could have warts under here. I could have spots, or scars.”
“You’d be lovely even with all of those,” the young man says, and he suddenly sounds serious. It takes Keith by surprise, makes his heart twist along with his stomach. “Your eyes,” he continues, tilting his head. “I’ve never seen eyes like yours before.”
Words: 75,705 AO3
Magic Bound & Unbound
Set in a world where familiars and witches are paired to perform magic together, Lance is an aspiring witch who is desperate to find his bondmate. He's dreamed of the day when he would be able to perform bonded magic, but hides a dark secret that could ruin everything. Keith is a familiar who's seen a little too much of the world. He's been paired with witches multiple times and each one has forced and broken a bond on him, so now he swears off ever letting himself be paired again.
When they meet, though, Lance triggers something in Keith and it scares the hell out of him. A part of him desperately wants to be paired, but he's not sure he can take rejection one more time.
Words: 56,345 AO3
Regarding Park Benches and Demon Bites
Lance forces his eyes open, all the way this time. It takes them a second to adjust, and when they do, his stomach plummets to the center of the earth. The man is in a black shirt, the sleeves rolled up on his forearms to reveal the runes inked across his pale skin. There’s a sword strapped across his back, a big one.
“You’re a Shadowhunter,” Lance blurts. Lance’s mother had warned him about getting mixed up with these bloodthirsty maniacs, and here he is, half conscious next to the very people he’d worked so hard to avoid the last two years. He’s fucked. Royally screwed. He isn’t sure what kind of punishment is handed out to warlocks for public intoxication but his mind races through options like indefinite imprisonment, dismemberment, death?
Words: 8,999 AO3
you build your tower (but call me home)
In the land of Arus, the youngest Nalquodian prince—Prince Leandro—is hidden away in a little castle that overlooks the kingdom; a countermeasure to protect him from the Galran assassins that have sworn to take his life.
And in the tallest tower of the castle, behind a grimy rose window and under a dusty sheet, is an enchanting gargoyle that the prince finds himself compelled to visit every day.
Almost as if by a spell...
Words: 63,041 AO3
Wild Magic
The Vastaya are an ancient and proud race, born of magic and man, and they are dying. The spread of humans makes the magic of their homelands run thin. What is left is preyed upon and corrupted by the rising galra influence.
After losing their home, what remains of the Marmora tribe scatters, fighting the spread of corruption where they can. For the last few centuries, this is the only life Keith has known. And with Shiro’s disappearance, he’s more alone than ever. But he keeps going, even if it means losing himself. For the fight. For his people. For their future. For his homelands. For magic.
The last thing he expected to find is another feathered vastaya, one with wings that shine like the sky and move like waves when he dances. He never asked for company, never wanted it. But as Keith finds himself growing fond of Lance’s flippant attitude and determined blue eyes, he thinks that maybe, just maybe, he doesn’t want to fight alone anymore.
Words: 151,776 AO3
A Touch of Magic
"Keith—" He feels his heart lurch as Keith squats down next to him. One hand on his wolf's head, scratching behind his ear. His eyes, however, remain fixed on Lance, and he had really hoped that the whole dry-mouth-lump-in-the-throat-heart-skipping-a-beat thing would've stopped happening when he turned, but here he is. Vampiric and still the flustered mess he was when he was human. "Buddy, I can't breathe—"
"You don't have to breathe," He says, that ghost of a smile still fixed and the whisper of amusement in his voice.
It sends chills down his spine.
Lance huffs as much as he can when there's a large wolf crushing his chest. "That doesn't mean it's not uncomfortable."
"You'll survive." He pats his wolf one last time before pushing to his feet. "Better luck next time, Lance."
"I'll get you one day, Keithy boy." He calls out as Keith walks away, disappearing from his vision and continuing down the path. "Just you wait."
Words: 19,953 AO3
For Fox Sake
Foxtail series
Photography has always been an passion of Keith's. Being able to capture that perfect moment - grant it immortality and unleash it to the world so that the people may decide what stories they tell - is what he lives for.
So when given the opportunity to expand his horizons, Keith finds himself on a month long excursion in the middle of nowhere, with only his camera and his own thoughts to keep him company.
And this forest - this mountainous landscape seemingly untouched by human hands - holds more than just a vast array of scenic landscapes and wondrous wildlife worthy of being captured in film.
It holds a secret. One Keith hadn't anticipated discovering, much less believing. And though they say "take only pictures, leave only footprints", Keith worries that when he finally has to return to his mundane world, he'll be leaving more than just tracks on the ground.
But his heart has always belonged to the woods, and he knows the fox will guard it well.
Words: 80,888 AO3
Ghost on the Shore
After moving into an desolated house in a swamp, Keith finds that the area's not as abandoned as he anticipated. He soon meets Lance, a mysterious boy that apparently lives out in the marsh, and who seems to possess magical powers to a certain degree.
Words: 37,055 AO3
It Never Rains on Saturday
Rain or Shine Series
In the magical kingdom of Altea lies an ominous tower filled with monsters. Every day, adventurers battle through the tower’s levels in a never-ending quest to slay the Demon King who lives at the very top.
Lance, a talented archer, is one such adventurer. However, Lance doesn’t want to kill the Demon King.
Lance wants to marry him.
Words: 22,726 AO3
Nameless
Lance McClain was not pale. He enjoyed the sun as much as any other, and though he was often run down or fatigued, this was due to his steadily amounting college work, not his need to sleep upside down. He was everything a vampire wasn't. Oh, except for his constant cravings for blood, and the name in cursive permanently scrawled over his wrist.
Since the name had appeared on Lance's thirteenth birthday, he'd been desperately waiting for the day he'd finally meet his soulmate. And it finally comes, the first day of his second year of college, delivering a boy that causes everything Lance had fantasized to come crashing down around him. Not only is his mate a human, but he's the kind of human that despises vampires. A hunter named Keith.
But matters of the heart aren't the only thing standing in Lance's way, for a much greater enemy is on the horizon, posing a threat not only to Lance and his family, but to Keith, too. The nameless are coming for them, and soon.
Words: 102,409 AO3
Were-woof
Living off the grid is one thing. Keith had been doing it his whole life. However, now that the mountain he has lived on his whole live is slowly being developed thanks to a ski resort it's getting harder and harder for Keith to keep to himself. Especially when he happens to catch the eye of a rather cute looking townie.
Words: 133,954 AO3
An Eternal Flame
“Do you have a deathwish?” The phoenix answers him with a question this time, apparently intent on dodging the question about its name. Maybe it’s for the best, Lance’s mama always warned him that he tended to get attached to things once he’d named them. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath.
He isn’t going to get attached this time.
Making sure that he’s still holding the phoenix’s attention, he reaches down and pushes his cloak aside, then lifts his shirt. There, bright red and ugly against his hip, are three long slashes. They aren’t scars, they aren’t healed in the slightest, they’re still red and open wounds. They don’t hurt, not in the physical sense, but Lance can’t help the repulsion he feels whenever he looks at them.
“Not a deathwish, a death sentence.”
Words: 63,692 AO3
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larryfanfiction · 6 years ago
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Fairy! AU
🍃 May We Stay Lost On Our Way Home by LoadedGunn (74k)
Harry thought he had a handle on things. He hasn’t gotten papped in over a month, even the most zealous of fans have given up on finding his location, the Fortress is starting to look hospitable, and Niall just learned how to make shrimp bisque. Even having a massive crush on a gorgeous mythical woodland creature was working out for him.
Most of the time.
On March 31st, Harry Styles disappears. Though many speculate, only two people know where to find him: Niall, his former guitarist, and Zayn, who follows where Niall leads.
The fact the biggest boy band in the world broke up two weeks earlier might be related to the disappearance. The fact Harry meets a fairy named Louis in the woods is a whole other matter.
(Liam is a centaur.)
🍃 hold on to your stars before they fade by adelagia (31k)
The first time they meet, it is sunrise, and Harry is naked.
(Or, the one where Harry is a lost fairy, and Louis takes him in.)
🍃 got me losing every breath (i’m latching onto you) by kissingiscool (14k)
It’s a blur to him, chasing Louis down from point A to point B, through a maze of pathways and a chorus of short giggles, chromaticity of canary and fern as dirt sticks to the soles of his running feet, and he feels alive, more alive than he’s ever felt in all of the twenty-five years of his life. More alive from the time he first when skiing. More alive than from when he had his first kiss. Just looking at Louis gave him a new definition of alive. He doesn’t know how long he’s been chasing, but the pounding of his heart and huff and puff of each breath that’s punched out of his lungs is so addicting that he doesn’t ever want to stop chasing him.
(or an au where louis is a fairy with a fear of thunderstorms and a talent of knitting and harry is a vet with three cats and a lot of love.)
🍃 Black with Autumn Rain by whimsicule (93k)
“Thank you,” Geoff says, taking a sip of his tea. “What did you tell him?”
Louis has a sip as well, lets the tea burn down his throat too quickly, too hot, and he feels it all the way down to his stomach. “The truth. Essentially,” he replies after a moment, licking his lips, relishing the slightly bitter taste of the brew that’s never quite strong enough for Louis’ liking. At least it’s not decaf. “That my dog scented it. That I didn’t touch the body. That I came here first thing.”
Geoff nods pensively. “Did he believe you?”
“Probably not. There’s only so many people who can drown on dry land before it gets fishy.”
or: Harry is a journalist, Louis has lots of secrets and the moors aren’t exactly the ideal place to rekindle a lost romance.
🍃 Away With The Fairies by Snowy38 (22k)
Harry liked pretty things.
Mostly the ornate flowers that grew around him, the trees majestically climbing towards the sky, sometimes the little colourful birds that flitted around in the branches of those trees.
Harry’s wings themselves were considered beautiful, big butterfly-like shaped things glistening pink in the light but white underneath, almost translucent.
He fluttered them behind him, feeling the breeze brushing off them. He was high up where he could see the most, studiously watching the human life on the ground below.
He shouldn’t be here of course, he was beyond the borders of the part of the forest where his kind lived, but he couldn’t help it.
Because Harry had found the prettiest thing of all.
🍃 Collision by itjustkindahappened (207k)
Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.
(Featuring Liam, the big and not-so-bad wolf who’s got a thing for humans, Zayn, a human with supernaturally good looks, and Niall, the cupid who just wants his job to be easier.)
🍃 I Won’t Treat You Like You’re Typical by moutonrose (5k)
Louis is a pixie and Harry is an elf. They meet at X-Factor auditions and fall in love.
🍃 Boiling Blood Will Circulate by whoknows (42k)
The wait isn’t long before something starts rustling in the bushes. Harry takes aim, squeezes the trigger, body moving unconsciously. They’re motions he’s done a thousand times before, and his body knows how to do it without the input of his brain now. It’s what makes him such a good shot.
He misses. The shot misses.
Something howls in the woods, a pretty clear indication that Harry hit it, but there’s no telltale sounds of a big body dropping, no animal charging out at him to take him out before he can finish the job.
Something does turn and run, though. “Fuck,” Harry spits out, scrambling to his feet and slinging the rifle back over his shoulder, giving chase. He’s not going to lose this hunt.
The trail of blood goes on longer than Harry thought it would. He doesn’t know how long he runs for, but his muscles are burning, chest heaving with exertion, until the trail just - goes dead. No more blood, just like that.
“Fuck,” Harry says.
🍃 Gently As She Goes by graceling_in_a_suit (33k)
Louis had been Harry’s best friend for as long as she could remember. She was a shoulder to cry on, a head of hair to practice braiding on, a mind as mischievous as Harry’s to scheme up antics and pranks with, someone to fall asleep next to when the nights were cold or when they both got lonely. Someone to dance with, to learn with, to laugh with.
They were girls together.
Then Louis left.
A modern fairytale (literally!) featuring a quest to bring a lost girl home, celtic goddesses, braiding, friendship, true love, and magic.
🍃 Delight in Masques by kassio (27k)
Popstar Louis Tomlinson has been pulling one over on the mortals for years. In the five years since he put on a human illusion and tried out for the X Factor, none of them have realised that he’s one of the Fair Folk – a cat shapeshifter, to be precise – and he’d like to keep it that way.
When he returns to the X Factor as a guest judge, the last thing he expects is for some half-Siren fool to use magic on the judges. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what Harry Styles does. Now Louis has to track down some rogue changeling before he exposes them all. Even worse? Apparently, Harry doesn’t even know what he is.
(An urban fantasy adventure, set in the world of - but not crossing over with - the October Daye book series. No need to be familiar with those books; I just want to give credit where it’s due on a lot of the worldbuilding.)
🍃 The Prince Of Light by jacaranda_bloom (35k)
Louis was found abandoned at a hospital at six months old and adopted by an older couple who raised him. Now twenty, he studies by night and by day works as a live-in au pair for a family with three little girls. One of the girls, Holly, swears there is a Garden Fairy coming and eating treats she leaves out in the cubby house each night.
When the family goes away for a two week holiday, Louis is secretly tasked with feeding the Fairy. While laying out the food one night he falls from the cubby house and is found by Harry. Harry is different and Louis is fascinated. But as Louis learns how different Harry really is, he discovers his own true home and a very surprising past he never knew.
Cue badgers, bananas and cookies, soulmates, a whole other world, and a future he’d never imagined.
🍃 The Fairy Ring by thedeathchamber (46k)
Harry has dreamed of a world outside the tiny village of Holmes Chapel for as long as he can remember… a world full of magic and adventure and true love. It was nothing but a childhood dream, however, until an old family friend comes bearing word of a plot against Harry’s life and a very dangerous truth: Harry is the rightful heir to the crown and must embark on a perilous quest to reclaim his throne from the ruthless would-be King Simon. But in the end Harry will find himself fighting for more than a crown, and on the verge of losing something much more precious than his sovereign power. Because magic might be real, but life is not a fairy tale, and Harry is a prince up against a very big dragon.
Or: a medieval fantasy AU in which Harry is a prince in disguise and Louis is the king of the faeries.
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the-gay-trashmouth · 5 years ago
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Rating: Teen
Warnings: Underage drinking/smoking
Ship(s): Javid, background sprace and Newsbians
Notes: This is pure fluff. Im so sorry it took me this long, brain is a bitch but i really tried.
~~~~~~~~~
Davey Jacobs was, as they say, a good jewish boy. He didn’t drink, he didn’t smoke, and the only drugs he took were his antidepressants and anxiety stabilizers.
So, how the fuck did mister golden child end up at a party like this with friends like these?
Around him, the friends in question danced around Katherine’s living room as Billie Eilish filtered through the speakers. Half of them were drunk off the vodka Mush had somehow gotten hold of and the other half were high from the weed Davey knew Albert got from one of his older brothers, even though the red-head swears he has some top secret dealer.
The only sober one aside from himself was Spot, who didn’t drink and refused to get high with so many people around. Davey had really only ever seen him high once, and that was the night of Jack’s 17th birthday when the five of them, Crutchie, Jack, Race, Spot, and Davey himself, all went up to the roof to smoke.
Apparently, the King a’ Brooklyn was a giggly stoner.
Davey also found out that he was a philosophical stoner, but he’ll keep that to himself. He would actually be murdered if his mother ever found out what really happened at Jack’s 17th birthday party, and he quite enjoyed being alive at the moment.
Now, ever so tragically, the only other sober person there was currently making out with Race on the couch, and Davey had less than zero interest in going anywhere near that. So he stood against the wall, sipping his lemonade and laughing quietly to himself when his intoxicated friends made absolute drunken fools of themselves.
He heard a commotion from the other room, but before Davey even had time to wonder what it was, Jack somehow appeared from the void and draped an arm around Davey's shoulders. Though he had gotten much more used to the casual touches and surprise arms slung around his shoulders, Davey's brain still gave him a brief error message whenever it happened.
He shook it off and looked at Jack with a raised eyebrow.
“Yes?”
“Hey Dave” he slurred in the taller boy's ear. David shook his head and tried his hand at a grin, though it looked more like a grimace when he scrunched up his nose up at the sent of the strawberry liquor.
“Hello Jack”
“Hey Dave?” This time it was a question instead of a greeting.
“Yes Jack?”
“Hey Daaave?” Jack either didn’t hear him or was too drunk to register that Davey had answered already. Davey just snorted softly and rolled his eyes.
“Whaaaat?”
Jack paused, looking up at him with the best puppy dog eyes his intoxicated brain could muster. Davey, for his part, was pretty okay, amused even, despite the fact that the smell of vodka on Jack’s breath was starting to make his head hurt.
“You should come play truth or dare with us,” he said, and immediately Davey ducked away, causing Jack to stumble forward without Davey to hold him up.
“No”
“But Daveyy!”
“But nothin’” davey crossed his arms and fixed Jack with his best motherly glare. Alas, it did not work and Jack just tried again.
“C'mon!” He tugged at Davey's arm and gave his best pleading look.
“Jack, buddy, pal, my platonic soulmate- there is no way I'm playing truth or dare with all of our intoxicated friends” he said decisively, “Jacky, I wouldn't play truth or dare with our friends sober. I love you all, I really do, but I don't trust any of you with my free will”
“Pretty pleease” Jack was now hanging fully off of David’s arm, begging like a child. David’s mouth quirked up into a smile for a brief second but returned to its usual motherly look.
“Not happenin’” Jack looked up at Davey with pleading eyes and the taller boy sighed. He really wasn’t getting out of this. Jack would just keep begging and begging until he gave in, there was literally no other option but to play.
“Alright alright, you win. I’ll play. But only for like two rounds!” he held up two fingers for emphasis and Jack grinned, grabbing his wrist to drag him towards the group already circling up.
There was a chorus of drunken whoops as he sat down in the circle. Spot raised an eyebrow at him as he begrudgingly joined them.
“Thought ya ain’t the type for these party games?” he asked, combing his hands through Race’s dirty blonde curls as the italian’s lips acted as chimneys, blowing curls of smoke in Spot’s face.
“Hey! I’m not some stick in the mud! I can have fun!” he replied indignantly. Spot just fixed him with an unimpressed look, though he wore it so often Davey thought that it may have just been his default expression.
Still, the taller boy sighed in defeat, “yeah, I’m not. But I suppose I am for tonight.”
Spot nodded, raising his capri sun at him in a toast as though it was a distinguished wine or manly beer, not a kids juice in a pouch. The sight made Davey chuckle softly to himself, The King a’ Brooklyn, scariest teen in New York, rumored to have connections to the mob, toasting his joining of truth or dare with a capri sun.
Really, why was the entire city so scared of this guy?
David jumped as Jack plopped down beside him, arm around his shoulder again. He blinked away the error message and sighed.
It started out innocently enough, weird as it was. Blink had to chug the rest of the voldka, Hotshot had to do a headstand for a full minute, and Race had to sit on Spot’s shoulders for the rest of the game. (He didn’t mind)
David also found out that JoJo once hooked up with an alter boy in church, Kathrine once blackmailed both of the Delancy brothers into doing her bidding for a full month, and Mush failed second grade and then skipped third.
“So, Spot, buddy, truth or dare?” Mush grinned drunkenly at him, draped over Blink’s lap.
“Truth”
Mush booed. “Boring~” he groaned, “fine, what's your real name?”
Race looked up at him anxiously, but Spot just nodded. “Ah, yes, funny story-” instead of finishing his sentence, he snatched the bottle of alcohol from Jack and took a swig.
“Oh, C’mon!” Spot just grinned, shuddering at the taste before passing it back to Jack.
“So, Jackie boy, truth or dare?”
Jack grinned, “Dare, I ain't no coward”
Spot raised an eyebrow, looking at Race for a beat before grinning like a shark. “A’ight, mista brave boy, I dare ya’ ta kiss the prettiest person in the room. Anyone’s up for the chopping block, except of course my Racer here,” David knew Spot was at least buzzed as he looked up to grin at Race as the other boy “aww”d and pressed a sloppy kiss to the corner of his mouth. Albert made a gagging noise as Race flipped him the bird.
David looked at Katherine with a raised eyebrow. Everyone remembered when she and Jack dated in their sophomore year. It ended badly, but they got to be friends again. Now, Sarah was passed out in her lap, arms wrapped loosely around her middle.
She was most certainly over him now, but he still assumed that she’d be who Jack choose.
So imagine his surprise when lips landed on his cheek.
He was too frozen in shock to really register the whoops and whistles coming from their mutual friends. He looked at jack, blue eyes wide as saucers, only to see the other boy with a lopsided grin.
Spot snorted, “that wasn’t even a real kiss! Thought you wasn’t a coward?”
“Hey! It’s rude to just go an’ kiss a fella!” he argued, “I ain’t kissin’ him ‘less he wants me too!”
“He does, trust me” Sarah grumbled from her spot in Katherine’s lap.
“Saz!”
“What? Ya’ do”
David sputtered, cheeks reddening be the second. His breath caught in his throat when Jack brought his hands up to cup his cheeks. He smiled before leaning in a bit. “Please tell me you’re okay wit’ this” he said almost breathlessly.
“I uh, yeah,” David cursed his stutter for probably the millionth time in his life, “Yeah, total-”
He was cut off with Jack’s lips on his. He dully registered the whoops and hollers from the teenagers around his but currently his senses were overtaken with just Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack Jack.
When they pulled back, they were both breathless. David looked up at Jack, who hadn’t stopped grinning.
“That- I… You taste like vodka.”
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florets-in-the-sky · 6 years ago
Text
Meetings (Cor Leonis)
{Fluff} First meetings were never his strong suit, but he thinks he can make an exception this time around.
Notes: Sorry for not writing anything in months, it feels like, but nothing was coming to me and I literally had to tie myself down to finish this one.
Warnings: None
Song: For the First Time
He had to tell himself that his reasons for breaking off the relationship were a beneficial thing. It had been mutual.
You yourself even admitted that. It was a necessary end to something that could have gone so far. He was busy with his work with the Crownsguard, you had other things tying you down and eating away at the time that was supposed to be spent together. But as you curled into yourself cuddled under piles of blankets mulling it over, why did you still feel like this?
It was pure spite and drive that pulled you from the slump. Throwing yourself into work was a lot better than throwing yourself to the void, you decided. And for a time, work was your entire focus. So much so that friends and family began to question if you were all right. You brushed them off with a smile and a shake of your head 
‘Don’t worry about me.’
‘I’ve never been better.’
Those false claims were better than dealing with the pitying looks everyone sent your way.
‘There’s the one.’
‘Broke up with the Marshal recently, right?’
‘I knew he wasn’t the type that settled.’
You placed scotch tape over the cracks and prayed no one would notice. No one could see you crumbling from the inside out if you looked put together. The whole thing was sorted and under wraps. No one needed to no otherwise. 
And of course, the consequence of throwing yourself into your job was losing it instantaneously when the city fell, as if some deity had seen your plight and instead of sending respite, snapped their fingers and watched it crumble. 
It was a miracle that you had been stationed outside of Insomnia at the time of the fall. Your home was gone--family and friends missing. You wondered how many people were still left from the once fabled city. Had he made it? It was out of the question. Of course he had. He was the Immortal after all. He couldn’t die in such an unbefitting way. Those were the lies you had to tell yourself to fall asleep. But more often than not, you lay awake in the dead of the night, thinking. 
So the next logical step was to head to the nearest bar and drink yourself into a stupor. Because how can you recover from that when everything else just keeps coming down around you? Again, not healthy, but it’s all you’ve got left to resort to. Maybe you should have taken up those offers from your friends a long time ago, but it was too late now. They were buried under the rubble anyway. If not that, then lost somewhere out in the wilds outside of Insomnia to the Daemons. No one ever called you cheery, and you suppose you now knew why. 
You were downing another drink, swaying in your seat when he strolled in. The Gods must really hate you. The only thing you could think of was taking the bottle you were holding and slamming it against his head. That was probably bad ex-etiquette though, as far as you were concerned. So you refrained, the only thing holding you back being the quiet whisper of your logical brain. That, and the fact that you had spent so many nights worrying over him and now he was there--right in front of you--very much alive, and every bit the way you remember you loved him. Every bit the way you remember you still love him.  
‘You’re okay.’
‘You’re here.’
‘I missed you.’
‘Don’t leave me.’ 
If you could quiet your aching heart and bruised ego, you would. That breakup was anything but mutual and you know that now.
He barely noticed you as he took his seat, seeming too lost in his own thoughts to even acknowledge you. You were seriously considering revoking what your logical brain was saying and taking the bottle straight to his face. 
Had he not thought about your wellbeing when the city fell? Had he not lay awake at night wondering? You suppose that was selfish. He had the Crownsguard to worry about, the Crown, the now dead king, and the future alive king and his posse. But the more he ignored you, the more your blood boiled. The only thing that stopped you this time was not the internal dialogue, but rather a pair of blue eyes that glanced up and captured you in place with that look.
At first, they were tired and distraught, weary and afraid. You hadn’t recalled the last time you had seen him like that. But in an instant, as if finding strength in yours, they brightened, surprise etching out their shape before it softened them, pupils dilated in the low lighting. You loved those eyes. You still love those eyes. They were the prettiest shade of blue even now. Even after.
“Hey,” he said. 
And you found yourself laughing, out of character for you, but it was hardly something you could find yourself caring about with how intoxicated you were and how absolutely ludicrous the situation was. 
“Hey? The city was just destroyed, and we lost both of our jobs, and that’s your best?” 
His shoulders sagged, shaking with his soft laughter. 
“Y’know, Marshall,” you drawled, fully enjoying his attention on you for the first time in months, “I would have expected you to be anywhere but here. We have some pretty strange luck.”
“Luck?” He cocks his head with a small grin.
You nod, taking another drink. “Yes, luck. We survived. We’re here.” You gestured to the bar haphazardly. “You still look pretty okay.”
His grin widens. “You’re drunk.”
“Not so.”
“You’re not nearly this bold when sober.”
You scoff and are about to take another drink when he takes it from you, despite your drunken protest. You would have fought harder for that bottle, but you were in no state to try. Not that you wanted to. The brief touch of his hand on yours was... welcome.  
So you let him drop you off at the nearby hotel and the only thing you can remember is you muttering something about his eyes to which he smiles. Then you mutter something about his smile and he shakes his head. You would continue to compliment him, but felt far too sick to do much of anything when he finally laid you down on the bed and tucked you in. You swear you felt the slightest brush of lips against your forehead, but couldn’t quite convince yourself it was real.
When you wake up in the morning with a headache that won’t quit and a body that aches, you wonder what compelled you to go out that night and drink so much. A glass of water and two pills are your saving grace for the moment.
You’re still nursing your head and contemplating a nap when you hear the door open and in steps Cor Leonis, Mr. Immortal himself. He’s wearing that usual hard to crack expression that means he’s thinking awfully too hard about something that will probably make him grumpy. It all dissipates when he catches you awake, and he hurries over.
“You feeling all right?” he asks, eyeing the empty glass of water and the absence of the pills he left earlier.
“Head still hurts, but it’s calming down,” you offer with a slow nod so as not to irritate it. 
“That’s good.”
He always was a man of few words, and at times you had found it endearing. Right now it was just painful and awkward as silence filled the room with you and your ex.
“I can pay you back for the--”
“There’s no need.”
More silence.
You clear your throat. “Well I think I should be heading out now.”
“Where to?”
“To find work? To get out of this hellhole? Some of us can’t simply swing a sword around and get paid.” You chuckle and unsteadily get to your feet. You breathe for a moment when you stand, gaining your bearings before heading for the door. “Thanks, Cor,” you manage, casting a glance over your shoulder at him before exiting. 
That wasn’t the last time you’d be seeing him.
~
The next time is purely coincidence you try to tell yourself, and not some trick of the Astrals trying to ensure that he remains a permanent fixture in your life.
He’s still wearing those black Crownsguard fatigues, and he still looks as stoic as ever, even as he sits in this dusty outpost with little to show for his efforts of holding back the Empire and helping the Crown Prince. He looks more of a mess than you think you ever did and the slightest bit of pity has you taking the empty seat next to him.
Just like before he catches your eye and the only thing that comes out is, “Hey.”
You laugh, ducking your head before allowing it to come back up and meet his eyes. “Hey.”
Cor didn’t think he would make it this far into the conversation and seemingly sits there, stumped as to where to go next. That’s your cue. It always has been. And right now, you could use the familiarity. 
“Heard you’ve been helping the Prince.” You cock your head. “How is he?”
He seems relieved that you’ve taken over the conversation, shoulders relaxing at the prospect of talking about something he knows about. “Good. A little wayward, but he’s finding his path. Got a good group with him.”
“I recall a similar group a long time ago heading out on a journey that wasn’t quite as taxing, but still important,” you say with a smile, and he finds himself easing even more under your gaze. You’ve always been able to do that and he’s starting to wonder what made him leave you. What made you leave him.
And pretty soon the both of you are sharing a drink, watching the last rays of filtering sun before retiring into the night. 
This is the most relaxed you remember seeing him, and this is the most relaxed you’ve felt since the break up.
“Can we start over?” you ask hesitantly and quietly, afraid maybe that this would be the sentence to end it all. But you can’t throw yourself into your work anymore. The void will have to do.
He stares at you in painful silence that has you wishing you’d swallowed your words or put them somewhere where no one could find them. But then his gaze eases and he offers a hand. “Hello. My name is Cor Leonis. It’s nice to meet you.”
You laugh, but it sounds like a sob as you take his hand. “Nice to meet you, Cor.”  
 Oh these times are hard
Yeah they're making us crazy
Don't give up on me baby
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keishajay · 6 years ago
Text
I meant for this whole review to go in one post, but damn, I had a lot of complaints, way more than I thought once I started writing them down.  Some are nitpicky; most are related to characters and writing choices.  For the fans of this series, I did enjoy this series for what it is, but I’ll never defend it as great literature.  It’s Sharknado levels of fun, and I live for stupid shit like that.  For the haters, enjoy.  Oh, and spoilers ahead.
Now, on to the cons, and hoo boy, are there a lot of them.  First, I was shocked to see this was labeled book 7 and not 6.  I had no interest in reading Tower of Dawn, as it was marketed as a side story novella.  Kingdom of Ash expects you to have read it and spends little to no time explaining who all these new characters are.  It’s not confusing, just annoying for those of us not invested in Chaol’s story enough to read the novella.  If you like Chaol, more power to you.  I just didn’t care enough about what was a sure outcome to waste my time reading a novella about him and only him.  Nesryn goes with him as well, but she was barely a character in the fifth (fourth? I don’t know anymore) book, more a cool background piece than a real person.  That’s not nearly enough for me to pick up an entire book.
Maas brings in four new “personalities” from Tower of Dawn that really just take up space and fawn over Aelin, just like everyone else.  Hasar is just a crabbier version of Aelin; Sartaq loves Nesryn and that’s it; Yrene is Chaol’s wife who’s a healer and that’s it; and Borte likes arguing with her fiance.  They might be more interesting in ToD, but here, they just read like cardboard cutouts.  They’re unnecessary and boring.
And speaking of unnecessary, there are WAY too many POV characters in these books.  What started with a handful of mostly essential characters has now become a library’s worth of them.  Even Lysandra’s ward, Evangeline, gets a couple POV bits to herself. Why?  They added nothing to the story aside from remind us that she was there and still alive.  More POVs should only ever be added to further the story or themes.  I kid you not, Elide and Lorchan are together for 90% of the last two books, and for some reason, they both have POV chapters.  Elide was already established and should’ve been the only one necessary, but you know, Lorchan’s hot so we should hear him angst too.  And that is all he does, by the way, angsts over Elide.  Hell, by the end, I was a little surprised Abraxos didn’t have his own POV chapter.
Maas also adds nonsensical things in to ramp up the drama.  The worst offender is the character Darrow.  He and TWO other old men boss Aedion around throughout this entire book, because... reasons, I guess.  They don’t recognize Aelin as queen, fine.  But they’re three old dudes against Aedion, who literally commands their entire army and the fire-bringer all the people in their whole country rally to.  If anyone can give me a logical reason why Aedion didn’t just ignore every order they attempted to give him, I’m all ears.  Instead, he tiptoes around them constantly and outright steals his own army from under their noses to do what he wants anyway.  Why?  They all know damn well Aelin is the rightful queen and they wouldn’t even have an army without her and Aedion.  She could crush them under her thumb, and they all know that too.  Hell, Aedion’s treason would even be forgiven in moments when she took her throne back from... no one.  Darrow isn’t even trying to be king of Terrasen.  He just doesn’t like the idea of this bratty teenager being his queen, and who can blame him?  Yeah, I know she wants her country to be different, but she can’t change anything from the sidelines when the old rules are the only things keeping those men in power over her.  There is no good reason for Aedion to obey any of their orders.  They can do nothing to stop him, and they all know it.  They are literally only there so Aedion has someone besides Lysandra to be pissed off at.
Speaking of Aedion being pissed off at Lysandra.  For the haters out there, yes, he has every right to be mad at her.  She may not have been the one to come up with this insanity, sure, but she knew Aelin suspected it might be necessary.  Telling the one person who foams at the mouth anytime someone gets within spitting distance of his cousin that maybe something terrible could happen to her, making this plan necessary, should be at the top of your to-do list.  She knew damn well what she was doing and how he would react the entire time Aelin was teaching her to play pretend.  He should be angry with her for not telling him what was going through Aelin’s head, not for following the orders of their queen.  Yes, him throwing he naked out in the snow was a major dick move, and I’m glad that she didn’t let him forget it.  What I don’t condone is his reaction to seeing Aelin again.  He just hugs her like nothing ever happened.  He’s an asshole to Lysandra for months, but he just forgives Aelin for everything as soon as he sees her.  I’m sorry but no.  I would’ve forgiven the entire conflict between him and Lysandra being tedious if he had just punched her in the face before he hugged her.  God knows she deserves it for all the shit she’s pulled over the course of six books.
So, I hate Aelin Galathynius.  Like straight up hate her.  She went from being a brat in the first few books to being the worst case of Mary Sueitis I have ever seen outside of self-insert fanfiction.  First, she’s a secret princess, a “twist” anyone with a brain could see coming.  She’s also somehow the best at everything she does, even though she shows no evidence of any of it.  How does the country’s best assassin get caught?  On top of that, how does anyone even know who the country’s best assassin is?  Shouldn’t hiding your identity be rule number one in the assassin handbook?  This shit-licker could’ve been any happy-ass teenager with a knife pretending to be this famous assassin when they caught her.  How would they know?  Answer, they shouldn’t have any idea (that would’ve also made for a much more interesting story).  So, not only is she the best at everything she tries for reasons, she’s also the only one in the whole damn world with fire magic, the only thing that can hurt the demons for a majority of the series.  And she doesn’t just have regular old everyday fire magic.  No, she has fire to rival fifteen suns going supernova at the same time.  She’s also the prettiest and smartest and nicest and snarkiest and funniest girl in the world.  She outsmarts someone thousands of years old who could’ve snapped her neck or dropped her in to a literal Hell with a flick of her wrist.  But no, Princess Mary Sue wants her new boytoy free, so the villainess has to get tricked into letting him go.  Now, let’s not forget she’s also the Chosen One who deus ex machinas her way out of sacrificing herself because no one can do anything without her there to save the day.  Seriously, no one ever wins anything unless she’s there.  It happens more than once in this book.  Her boytoy and company show up to rescue her from aforementioned villainess just as she’s breaking herself out, and they can’t get her chains off until she somehow shows them how to unlock them.  She then proceeds to get them out of the country through her magic of summoning deus ex machinas whenever she needs one, and they arrive just in time to rescue Chaol and Nesryn from certain doom.  She stops a cascading river with fire because science, and when all hope is lost back home, she shows up on a magical white deer with the Rohir- oops, I mean her army.  She also somehow holds off two of the most powerful creatures in the world with her assassin skills and barely any magic, because... villains have to lose, I guess.  You know what Aelin loses by the end of the book?  Her humanity, which she suddenly cares about ten pages before it’s gone.  Aedion lost his father and at least half an army at his command.  Manon lost the only people she really cared about in the whole world, and she could do nothing but watch them sacrifice themselves.  And Aelin lost her humanity when she’s already been living as a fae since book 3.  Oh God, how will she ever survive such a loss?  She is actually the worst.
These books, this one in particular, are clearly written with a younger audience in mind (much younger than me at least, and I’m 30), and I strongly believe the target audience is girls.  There is so much description of how beautiful the men in this series are that it almost borders on obscene.  I do appreciate having a clear picture of what characters look like, but I do not need to know about all the rippling muscles and long fingers that all the men in this series seem to have.  Even bookworm Dorian is described as being oh-so-sexy even though he doesn’t appear to have ever handled a weapon in his life.  There is a lot of pandering to the female audience, especially with the sex scenes.  In a YA novel, these are pretty inappropriate.  She started with sex scenes being a fade-to-black kind of event, and now, almost every single one is described in disgusting detail.  I like romance as much as the next girl, but if I wanted soft-core porn, I’d read romance novels.  To top that shift off, she still insists on using “rutting” as a substitute for “fucking,” and I think that’s what bothers me the most about the whole change here.  They are completely interchangeable in every context, to the point where I just read “rutting” as “fucking” every single time.  This isn’t Brandon Sanderson’s silly but story-appropriate swearing.  It’s just lazy writing.  And detailed descriptions of sex are okay, but swearing?  Someone call Takamata.  We need to start the Inquisition. (History of the World reference for anyone confused.)
This story ends exactly as you should expect it to, with a happily ever after.  None of the main characters die, and those with names go out as sacrifices, which is honestly consistent with the rest of the deaths in this series.  The deaths we do get are mostly to make the main characters feel bad for no real reason.  Aedion even flat-out states that Gavriel could’ve stayed inside the walls, and there is no argument, author or characters, as to why he had to go outside.  At least the Thirteen’s sacrifice makes more sense.  It was still pretty dumb to have them go out at all, but I don’t know if I could come up with a better way to destroy those witch towers.  What they did was noble and understandable in context, though there were probably any number of ways it could’ve been avoided.  I’ve seen Desolation of Smaug.  Just drop a dragon/whale/elephant-Lysandra on top of the tower before they even get it fixed up to move again.
One last complaint that I have regarding the ending is largely the villains.  There are three of them, and all three kind of go out like bitches.  Erawan, the dickhead pulling the strings since book 1, gets tricked and healed to death.  There are a lot of millennia-old creatures getting tricked into doing stupid things in these books.  Manon’s grandmother (who never gets a name by the way) gets blown up by Asterin.  Honestly, hers was probably the most satisfying end of the three because Asterin got the vengeance she deserved for her hunter and child.  Maeve somehow became the biggest threat halfway through the series, and she meets her end in the most extravagant fashion, impaled by Fenrys and then decapitated by Aelin and burned to ash.  What irritates me most about Maeve is she could’ve been great.  If anyone has read the manga, Magi, you know what I’m talking about.  Maeve is discount Gyokuen with half the threat and less than a quarter the sense.  Where Gyokuen is highly capable, both as a fighter and a politician, Maeve is kind of a pushover who gets tricked by our “heroes” numerous times.  She’s shown preparing for all sorts of unlikely eventualities, but she somehow can’t handle the plucky teenagers.  Give me a break.  From the moment you meet her, you know Gyokuen is going to be one of those bad guys that will require some clever thinking to defeat.  I felt like Maeve could just be snuck up on and murdered by anyone who knew her schedule.  Her last ditch effort against Aelin was clever, but other than that, she barely puts up a fight despite all the fear and hype she gets from almost every character in the book.
Now, like I said above, I did enjoy these books.  I don’t feel like my time was wasted or that I was manipulated by them at all.  I had fun with them the same way that I have fun with SyFy channel original movies.  The characters and story had so much more potential than what this amounted to, but I don’t hate this series at all.  Yes, the subplot with the gods was idiotic and unnecessary, but the valg were interesting as an enemy type.  Yes, the romance shoved down my throat could be awful at times, but some of the relationships were genuinely sweet.  Chaol and Dorian are the best bros, and I love Lysandra taking it upon herself to protect this little girl when she could’ve looked the other way.  Manon’s relationship with Asterin was great as well.  Do I wish it was better?  Absolutely.  Should it be boycotted by everyone?  Of course not.  Despite their problems, these books are fun, fluffy, popcorn movie fun, and sometimes, that’s just fine.
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