#Gordon: Is it bring your kid to work day?

[violent138]

(Sets canon sort of to the side) Gordon was probably so pissed when Batman suddenly showed up to crime scenes with a brightly coloured kid in tow, and it likely led to several arguments (considering that Batman routinely walks into gunfire, drives like a maniac, and hunts down the worst the city has to offer) that they stopped working together until some major disaster and Gordon just had to accept the kid was there to stay.

[too-much-tma-stuff]

Finally getting help (prt 4)

Masterpost

The bats worked through the night, coordinating and researching everything that needed to be done. Distortion showed up on the camera which they assumed was Vlad trying to get in but he didn’t manage it. After he finished trying from multiple angels including somehow from directly above (well Zatana did say invisibility, intangibility, and flight were the minimal powers they should expect from creatures of the infinite realms.) He turned human again and spent a long time banging on their front door.

He tried to call the cops but commissioner Gordon called Bruce directly to get the full story then told Vlad it could be dealt with in the morning. Zatana was also coordinating people heading to Amity, a full on raid of the GIW, and the Fentons.

Batman and Superman were collecting all the information that the raid team was sending out and workshopping public statements they could sent out to the public and the government about the unacceptable things they had found and the steps the JL was taking to fix it. The government was not going to be happy they knew, with the JL ‘over-stepping’ into their business and actually getting the word out about the atrocities a branch of their government and their pet scientists had been planning. The JL needed to get out ahead of it before the narrative could be twisted against them.

It was first thing in the morning when they did a live broadcast from the watchtower with Batman, Superman, and Zatana telling the world about the parallel world existing harmlessly along side their own, and the way the government tried to exploit it. The atrocities committed under the name of the Anti-Ecto acts with the ignorance of the public as a cover.

It was at the same time that Constantine, Dick, and Cas were raiding the Fenton’s home. Of course they were armed, but so were the bats, and they were used to fighting people who were armed. It wasn’t a particularly hard fight.

A redhead was sitting wide eyed at the kitchen table. “Can’t we just have one normal day!” She suddenly snapped but she was glaring at her parents, standing up and slamming her hands on the table.  “First you send Danny away with Vlad even though you KNOW they hate each other and it’s a school day and now this! What did you do to bring the heroes down on us!?”

“I don’t know Jazzybear!” Jack half whined as he was forced into power supressing cuffs to neutralize his minor super strength and sat down in the living room.

“I’m sure this is just a misunderstanding, don’t worry sweetie,” Maddie added, both of them were dressed in jump suits which did not help their supervillain vibes.

“it’s not a mistake mate, you’ve been messing with shit you really shouldn’t. And that portal in your basement is a fucking beacon welcoming a war. You’ve gone unchecked for too god damn long, we’re taking over things now.” Constantine told them before stalking down into the basement with Tim on his heels, Batman would be joining them as soon as they were done their press conference.

Cas stayed to watch the parents and Dick approached Jazz gently. “Hey can I talk to you in private please? It’s about your brother,” He said gently and she stiffened immediately. Looking at him in a way that made him feel like she could see straight into his soul and froze him to the spot. After a moment though she just sighed and nodded, beckoning to him to follow her upstairs, to a room that was probably Danny’s not her own. She sat on his bed and grabbed a bear that had been sitting on the edge, waving for him to sit at the desk.

“So, what do you know?” She asked with a sigh.

“Well, last night Vlad took Danny to a Wayne Gala, one of Bruce’s daughter Cas is really good with body language and clocked that something was wrong so she and one of the other kids got him away from Vlad and out of the party. I guess he really needed some adult support because he broke down and told them a lot, about the Phantom thing, the ghosts and… something you’re not going to like. But first I want you to know he’s safe, Bruce Wayne is a licensed foster parent and he’s taking good care of Danny, you can come live with them too if you want.

“We’re going to deal with the ghosts and the GIW and everything else now, I can’t promise by the end of this you won’t need somewhere else to go. I have a feeling if Batman and the Martian family have anything to say about this your parents will end up in prison for their unethical experiments.”

“As long as Danny is okay,” Jazz said firmly. “I was only staying to take care of him anyway, just get me emancipated and a scholarship for Gotham U so I can study while still being close to him I’ll be fine. I’m almost 18 as it is.”

Dick nodded, she was a smart and driven girl, she knew what she wanted, he could respect that. “Now, the thing you won’t like…” he trailed off and took a deep breath. “Danny is pregnant.”

“What!?“ Jazz blanched, gaping at him for a long minute. “That can’t be right! I mean I knew he was trans but he’s usually only interested in girls, how would he even-“ She cut off her eyes widening. “It was Vlad wasn’t it?” She gritted out with an expression the promised excruciating violence.

“Yes,” Dick said shifting awkwardly in his chair.

“Right.” Jazz said and got up, coldly calm. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be right back.” She grabbed a baseball bat from next to Danny’s bed that seemed to be glowing slightly then marched to the other side of the room, opened a cabinet and pulled out two odd looking guns. Before Dick could say much of anything she had vaulted out of the window and taking off down the street.

“Oh dear,” Dick muttered faintly before heading back downstairs. “Hey Cas can we turn on the news, some sort of local station?” He asked. Cas nodded and searched around for the remote, turning it on to find the channel was already on local news.

Vlad was already on there, talking about how it was awful Bruce Wayne had Kidnapped a local child Danial Fenton, and he could not be allowed to get away with this just because he was rich! But that didn’t last long, they watched for a few minutes before a blur of red hair and blue rushed past the camera.

“YOU TOUCHED MY BROTHER YOU CREEP!” Jazz said as she came out swinging and she must have quite the arm because her first swing sent him nearly flying off the stage. He scrambled to get up as she lunged at him again.

“Now Jasmine you’ve clearly been misinformed, I didn’t do anything-“ His muffled voice was cut off as she swung the bat again and he yelped as she hit him in the stomach.

“YOU GOT HIM PREGNANT! YOU DID THIS! YOU SHOULD BEHIND BARS NOT BEHIND A PODIUM YOU FROOTLOOP!” She shrieked as she swung again and this time he managed to dodge. The cameras following them as Jazz chased him down the street, the sound of his supplications and her shrieking fading out as they became more and more distant.

It took a frantic moment for the camera angle to switch to something else, maybe a drone, which was able to follow them down the street.

“You Don’t UNDERSTAND! I didn’t want to hurt him! I just wanted a perfect son! If he had just agreed to be my son none of this would have happened! When I knew it failed I told him to let them die!” Vlad yelled at her, though that did NOT seem to comfort Jazz at all. She had devolved into shrieking book titles like curses as she chased him with the bat and shot at him with the guns though her aim didn’t seem very good.

Well they had him admitting to it on camera now. As he watched a new actor joined the fray, a girl in a red jumpsuit holding a blaster.

“You did what to Danny!?” She demanded as she pointed the blaster at Vlad.

“Oh cheespuffs!” Vlad breathed, his eyes widening as Jazz trailed off letting who must be Red Huntress take over the chase as Vlad shouted about how he had made her! He had given her her weapons she couldn’t use them against him! Which did not seem to be stopping her.

The camera fuzzed out for just a second and then Valery was chasing a ghost with red eyes and a white outfit. Cas was laughing silently at the show and both of the Fenton parents seemed to be in shock. A few minutes later Jazz walked back in through the front door looking tired.

“Turn that off please,” she sighed as she put the bat down.

“Of course,” Cas agreed and picked up the remote again, turning off the tv. 

“Vlad didn’t actually do that, did he Jazzy?” Jack asked softly, he sounded so hurt, as if he had any fucking right!

Jazz looked at him blankly. “How many times have we tried to warn you about him? How many times has Danny told you he didn’t feel safe with Vlad? But as usual you couldn’t see past your own desires. I’m going to go see if the trenchcoat guy needs any help getting into your files,” She sighed before vanishing downstairs. 

Dick glanced at Cas, and then followed them, she would have no trouble watching the Fentons and staying quiet whereas Dick felt like he was about to explode. Batman joined them before long and between the three of them they shut the bulkheads on the portal and locked them, secured dangerous chemicals and devices, and downloaded everything they could. There were plenty of prototypes and blueprints, and stuff that could generously be called research.

It was obvious these people were geniuses but it was even more obvious that at some point they had become careless and obsessive. Half of the writing on the blueprints wasn’t legible, dangerous chemicals were not in proper containment, and the weapons were not locked up. Looking at all of this it wasn’t surprising that two of the people they had been involving in their research suffered exposure, it was a surprise more hadn’t. It was easy to tell when Bruce came down he was horrified, it was in the way he froze when he saw the lab, as if his brain was struggling to process just how irresponsible the Fenton parents had been.

“You must be Jazz, it’s nice to meet you. Danny speaks highly of you,” He finally rebooted to say when she waved at him. 

“I love my little brother, I always did the best I could to keep him safe from… all this,” Jazz said gesturing at the lab with a sigh. “I wish it had done any good.”

“You did plenty of good,” Dick put in. “Trust me, to a kid having someone care about them can make all the difference. 

“All those nights I patched him up after he came back from fighting ghosts. He healed fast but still. I can’t believe… he’s already been through so much and we knew Vlad was up to something! Ellie said she was our cousin but she looked just like him, I should have kept a closer eye on-” She cut off and shook her head. “He’s a good kid, of course if he couldn’t give the babies up, even if it would be better for them if he did. I hope he knows I’d support him either way, I hope he didn’t not tell me because he thought I’d be upset at Him.”

“I’m sure he didn’t,” Dick assured her gently. “Being a big sibling is hard, I know. But trust me you’re doing a great job, better than I did with my brothers,” he said, patting her shoulder. “You can ask him yourself later though. We have a lot to get done today to make sure he’s safe.”

She nodded stubbornly and doubled down on her work, directing them occasionally to where she knew they’d find more weapons or logs. She knew her way around the lab to a disturbing extent. 

Bruce and Dick both got a notification from Agent A saying that after a substantial sleep in Danny had woken up and was having breakfast. He seemed worried about the family but he was taking it alright, especially since he knew they were busy people. It did motivate Dick to clear things up as soon as they could so that they could get back to Danny though. The last thing he needed was More stress!

They had plenty of evidence of the Fenton parents breaking the law to call the police and have them taken away which gave them all the time they needed to strip the house. They got everything they could and decided to leave Constantine at the house to watch the portal until they could figure out how to shut it down completely without causing any damage. It seemed unstable so they didn’t want to risk it just now, especially without Danny’s input because according to Jazz Danny had made genuine connections in the Infinite Realms. 

They wrapped up this stage of the investigation before dinner after being up for about 36 hours. Of course they weren’t Done, there was still plenty to do investigating the government, how they’d gotten away with this and if they had any other nasty tricks up their sleeve. They’d have to manage any backlash from this unilateral move, and they’d have to figure out what to tell the public about Danny since Bruce would be fostering him. But all that could be done after having a family dinner with their new brother and a nap. 

part 5

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[riot-ghost]

Commissioner Gordon was ostracized within the Gotham Police department. He knew this was because of his ties to the Bat, his late hours, constant overtime. He knew that even the good officers, while he couldn't tell too much who was who, didn't mean to ostracize him. It happened on accident, he's sure. He picked up some clues from the world's greatest detective. Rumors went around, running rampant about him. He just couldn't care so much about them.

Everyone knew that Commissioner Gordon always took his late dinner at 9:37 at night. Everyone cleared from the break room. Gordon opened the door, taking a heavy breath. He was still expecting the empty room. It felt empty, in a way Gordon had picked up from The Bat. He pulled his burrito out of the fridge, opening the styrofoam container and eating a bite. "You're not going to heat it up?" Gordon barely manages to catch his burrito, his whole soul leaving his body.

"Jesus Christ, kid, you scared me." Gordon lets out a heavy breath, seeing the new detective sitting at a table in the corner. He's eating... Something indescribable. He looks tired, his long black hair bulled back into a high ponytail. His face seems disproportionate, large prominent features. A crooked nose, a wide, thin mouth, large eyes accompanied by large bags. His skin was pale, dusted with faded freckles and litchenburg scarring. The young man- still a boy, practically, shrugged at Gordon's words, eating another bite of the odd food. "No one warned you I'd be in here?" Gordon decided to sit with him.

"No, they warned me. But the past couple of days they've been... Avoiding me." Dr. Fenton, Gordon remembers his file passing over his desk. He could never be a cop- he was a detective-by-hire because of some medical condition. Gordon feels a pang at the emotionless words.

"Ah, they avoid me too." Gordon takes another bite of his cold burrito. "So, how have you been enjoying working here?"

"Well, it's been alright, I guess." Fenton took a drink from his thermos- which has a straw in it. It goes unsaid that this was the only job Fenton could really get. Close to the force, anyways. His medical condition refrained him from being a proper officer, so he wasn't officially a Gotham PD detective. He was an out-contract detective, receiving the same work, pay, and hours as the regular detectives.

"Getting around the town well enough?"

"Well enough, I suppose. Almost got robbed." Fenton held three doctorates- criminology, psychology, and natural sciences. All at the young age of 22.

"Almost?" Gordon snorts a bit at that. "Scared them off with your badge?"

"I don't have a badge. And I don't have a gun, if that's what you're thinking. I guess they just thought I was too pathetic to have much cash." Danny shrugged.

"Oh come on, you're not pathetic." Gordon is a bit taken aback that the boy doesn't carry any weapons. He makes a mental note to get him a badge.

"I looked pathetic enough not to rob."

Gordon feels like he missed something there, because Gotham robbers would rob a kindergartner if they were unattended. Regardless, he and Fenton sat in silence for a good couple of minutes. "What are you eating?" Fenton asks eventually.

"A burrito from the Mexican stand on Westwood."

"Why are you eating it cold?"

"Because if I reheat it, then the sauce becomes a solid liquid and everything gets soggy. What are you eating?"

"It was supposed to be stir fry?" Danny stared down at the leftovers container. "I'm not good at cooking. No videos ever make sense, so they don't turn out right."

"Your parents didn't teach you?" Gordon asks.

"No, they weren't the best chefs. They did pass on the family fudge recipe though. I can make some killer fudge." He laughs a little bit at that.

"I'll bring you lunch in from now on." Gordon says. "Until we can get your cooking sorted out, anyhow. Normally my daughter and I spend Tuesday nights fixing dinner together, so you'll get the best meals Wednesday."

"You don't have to do that." Danny seems a little caught off guard by the kindness.

"I can't have one of my youngest detectives going hungry!" Gordon smiles. "Besides, you're the first person in the precinct to eat dinner with me in nearly twenty years. You keep eating with me, it'll be no problem. I enjoy the company." Danny smiles at him and Gordon is reminded of someone, but he can't remember who.

Over the next couple of weeks, Gordon and Danny get well acquainted in their overlapping shifts. Danny works the nights and sometimes early mornings, similar to what Gordon does. Gordon finds himself feeling fatherly to the young man, who's working and picking up significant overtime to pay off his student loans. He learns that Danny moved here from Illinois- it was the only PD he could work at. He had no formal fighting training, but apparently his mom had taught him some moves. They had yet to overlap in the field, and it was easy for Gordon to forget that the boy was really a detective.

"Danny?" Jim paused, having finally made his way to the crime scene. Danny was crouched over a dead body, using his gloved hands to inspect the wound- the word Joker carved using some sort of knife.

"Gordon?" Despite all insistence, the boy still used his last name.

Jim has to stop himself from asking him why he's here. Danny's eyes shift to a spot behind him and James sighs. "What happened?" Batman's voice startled the last officer in the room, who quickly stuttered an excuse and left.

"The Joker broke in, tortured her, and left." Jim says. "We just have to figure out why."

"No, we don't." Danny looked back at the body, his eyes unfocused. "It was political. Do you see the swelling here on the neck? No lacerations, and no bruising. Allergy, I suppose, or a poison that reacts similarly. No clawing at the neck or face, but heavy rope burns on the wrists and ankles. The cuts were sloppy, and from the bleeding, it was done after she had died. Maybe five, ten minutes after? The window wasn't fully closed when it was broken into, do you see how the glass fractured there at the top?"

Jim blinked, and Danny continued. "It doesn't fit the motive of a mad-man like the Joker to do this. Who you're looking for is a woman, younger than the victim, maybe around twenty or thirty?" His eyes unfocused again. "Hmmm." He snaps back, looking around. He stands, his hands shaking a little. He looks around, eyes landing on the shelf. He scans it, using gentle hands to lift the potted plant. He pulls out a camera, unplugging it. "A Direct Link- model E47C." He sets the camera in an evidence bag.

Batman gives a grunt- and if Jim isn't mistaken it was one of approval? Danny held the camera out to Jim. "That was some fine detective work today, kid." Jim sets his hand on Danny's shoulder. Danny glances off to the side nervously. He locks eyes with Batman. "Danny, this is Batman. Batman, this is Dr. Daniel Fenton, the newest detective on the force."

Batman holds a hand out. "I look forward to working with you." Danny pulls off one of the disposable gloves, reaching out to shake his hand. "You're shaking a little, are you alright?"

"Medical condition." Danny answers. "You're taller than I expected."

"It's the ears." Jim represses a smile. "You go ahead and get your deductions filed. I brought pasta." Jim watches Danny leave. He turns to Batman, who's staring him down with that signature I-know-everything™ face. "What?"

"When are you going to let him know that you're mentoring him?" He says it like a sentence, and was that amusement in his tone?

"I'm not." Jim turns to the window.

"You brought him pasta."

"He never learned to cook."

"So you're teaching him." There was definitely amusement in his tone now.

Jim huffed. "We're getting old." He finally sighs. "We both have full grown kids. Crime and corruption are still thick in this city." Batman is standing next to him with a swoosh in his cape. "Retirement... I could see myself with it. Sipping cocktails on the beach. A beach with sunshine and no broken down carnivals."

Batman is silent for a moment, as if considering this. "So you see Fenton taking your place?"

"Like you see your Robin." Jim admits.

[theredhoodedcryptid]

POV: apparently it’s being your kid to work day.

Gordon was NOT prepared for the creature he started working with to have a kid, much less bring them to the stakeout.

(Saw folks doing cute Robin and Batman art with this general pose, so of course I had to include my Cryptid bois!)

(Robin kept getting out and running around, so Batman was forced to use other means of containing his feral son.)

(Inspired by this post)

(and also this post)

[thesharktanksdriver]

The Spider’s web (platonic)

You used to be an average kid, one who went about their day without so much as a care in the world

Granted, you were being raised by your elderly aunt and uncle, and you were somewhat of a science wiz but other than that yeah pretty normal

Until a radioactive spider bitt you after you and your uncle got into an accident which ended up with you as the survivor

And that lead you becoming a web-slinging vigilante known as spider

Ok scratch that maybe you weren’t so normal after all but to be fair no one was in Gotham

During the day you were a teenager who went to school, made some extra cash on the side to support your aunt after your uncle’s death

But at night you dawn your suit and sling across the city helping as best you could

Unlike Batman or his figurative family you help out in smaller ways

You help by bringing people home safely, handing out umbrella when it’s raining, saving cats out of trees, stopping some petty crime and giving the criminals a talk to find out why they needed to do said crime, helping firefighters ect

You still saved quite a few people but you also focused on making others happy

Since something as small as a wave of kind gesture of a stranger can improve someone’s day significantly

You also focus on helping those who are committing petty crime since you know it’s usually out of desperation

And desperation is a big thing in Gotham unfortunately

Your a more friendly figure compared to the Batman, bright colours and an expressive mask that makes you more approachable

Along with that your quite vocal, saying hi to passersby’s as you swing past or offering high fives

Also a lot of quips, like a lot. plus jokes thrown to make people laugh

Your swinging webs dissolve after a set period of time so by morning their gone thus no complaints from business owners about it

Whilst Batman and his team look out for Gotham as a conglomerate you look out for the little guy

Pitching in to areas when the other vigilantes of the night can’t get to

It’s actually quite fun and no matter how tired an beat up you are from stopping a minor scuffle it’s worth it to you

The bruises and black eyes serving as metals to your meddling in making sure someone didn’t get shanked

Gordon is the only cop you trust and actively report to him about cops that are taking advantage of their power

You have a little camera on your suit making filming encounters much easier along with the fact you sometimes take photos for fun

And use some of those photos for money…you spend a lot more than you probably should do you sometimes sell photos to newspapers

Anyways, you leave the clips of certain cops for him to see and review

Which also makes most cops not really like you but they don’t really like Batman either so it’s not like your the only one

He’s pretty friendly with you but you can also tell he’s worries

Like real worried

It’s basically obvious to everyone your a kid despite how you try to deepen your voice a bit

He knows he can’t really stop you so he does his best to give you tips and pats on the back for your work

He swears that when he hears about you on the news he gets more grey hairs

Or when you show up at his window donuts in hand with a nasty bruise on your jaw

Listen he doesn’t care you “have a weird healing factor” your getting a patch for that

Barbara laughs when he grumbles that he now has a new kid to look after

You don’t admit it but he reminds you a lot of your uncle and it makes you feel nostalgic

On long nights for Gordon you like to swing by (hah get it) and leave him some coffee and donuts

He appreciates it but wishes you’d let him pay you back

Another thing Gordon doesn’t know is that when your uncle died he was the cop that comforted you back at the station

While all the others worked he took the time to help you

Which is something you’d never forget

So to pay the favour back in some sense you do your best to help him as well

But he doesn’t have to know your reasoning…yet

You sometimes leave little notes for him with doodles of yourself that have motivational messages

Batman asks him about you since he has really had to time to actually talk to you but Gordon tells him your a good kid

But your probably too stubborn to stop doing what your doing

Gordon really appreciates what you do even if it’s not taking down super villains

You go out of your way to make others happy and make the streets a little more safe

Plus you seemed focused on rehabilitation and helping people who do crime as a last option for survival

He’s actually met quite a few people you’ve talked to and helped get back on their feet

Probably had a little notebook where he puts all your doodle notes

Whenever you leave his office he tells you to stay safe and that you’d doing good out there

You always give him a thumbs out before back flipping out his window

Despite how many times you do it he looks out to make sure your ok

Barbara meets you one day when she stopped by to make sure her dad was ok and found you and him talking

When she came in you jumped to the ceiling and they just watched you for a minute before laughing

Honestly Barbara is really fun and cool

Whenever she stops by her dad’s office she kinda silently hopes your there cause your a ray of sunshine

She appreciates your work a lot and it never ceases to make her smile when she offhandedly hear people talk about your deeds

Definitely teases her dad a lot lol

Sometimes like Gordon you leave little notes for her on her wheelchair

You both develop so many inside jokes that Gordon can only scratch his head at

She leaves you snacks like granola bars and smoothies for her dad to give you

Like her dad she’s concerned but moreso about how your doing this without anyone else to help you

Sure your activities aren’t taking down and making enemies with super powered villains but all you needed is one bad encounter and your down

And it worries her how you don’t seem to care about yourself and put others happiness on pedestal

Like helping others matters but so does helping yourself

As oracle she sometimes hacks stuff to give you little hints or tricks for you to use

These have probably saved you from getting an infection from leaving your wounds unbothered due to your “it’ll heal” mentality

She’s kinda silently curious what your abilities allow you to do. Like she knows you can climb walls and you have some type of healing factor but she wonders if there’s more

So y’all make a game out of it and every week she guesses one possible ability you have and you answer her

Like her dad she knows your too stubborn to stop

You have too much of a big heart to not help people, your the one person who doesn’t stand down no matter the punches thrown your way

It’s an admirable trait but also dangerous

You geek out with her over tech and when you get your own popsicle

Sure that popsicle doesn’t look the greatest but your amazed anyways over the smallest stuff like that

It makes her heart swell when you talk about how happy you felt when you found out you had fanart!

It’s normal for hero’s to have that but your just so flabbergasted that someone went through the effort of drawing you

It reminds her once again that your a kid in all of this

One day she’s asks why you haven’t met Batman yet and you tell her why

That your kinda scared of him considering Gotham isn’t the friendliest to meta humans

And consider you now have powers your part of that crowd

Plus you just want to help in ways Batman usually can’t

She’s understanding to this and makes note to tell Bruce

At this point she probably knows your identity but only by accident

She never brings that up though

Content with just letting you go on in peace without you worrying about her accidentally spilling the info to someone

Her heart will explode if you ever mention how batgirl was one of your favourite hero’s growing up

Bane is the first real villain who kinda takes an interest in you from seeing you firsthand one day

So he has he men track you down and bring you to him

And then he finds out that you know most of them already and just willingly followed them?

Yeah turns out you already knew a lot of his men cause you’ve helped a handful of them with stuff like car troubles and making sure the neighborhoods a few live in are safer

And also inadvertently convincing some of them to get a better job instead of committing crime and they took that as become a full on henchman

Your a bit disappointed but Bane is a fair boss so it somewhat makes up for the fact their still in the crime business

Meanwhile bane is kinda confused cause your a kid??

Like sure he fights Robin but even then he goes somewhat easy and they have Batman as a mentor

Your just a fucking kid on their own doing this?!?

Dear god this man is so concerned

Even more so when you try to deepen your voice and then it cracks and there’s an awkward silence afterwards

Oh and then they hear your stomach grumble

You get a full on meal from them giving you some of their lunches plus some extra snacks

Your such a good kid and he’s like real worried that one day someone will take advantage of that

So he kinda begins training you, well not full on training but giving you some pointers

Like better stances or how to throw a better punch

He finds it really funny how expressive you are with your mask and how your tiny compared to him

He quickly catches on that you seemingly have enhanced senses and strength cause almost no one can beat him in a fight let alone a young teenager (it was more of a playful fight but point still stands)

You once offhandedly mention that you have to care for your elderly aunt by accident and he’s now packing you some extra food and slips some money into there as well

Probably knows he can figure out your identity real quick but doesn’t make the effort since he’d rather you go to him yourself if/when your ready

Is this what being a parent is like? (Yes, yes it is Bane)

He helps improve your suit and gives suggestions on what material would be better

Nearly has a heart attack when you one day show up to his base with a stab wound

Sure it’s healing but like what the fuck?!

His men kinda tease him for being a mother hen

He can’t help it though cause he’s always had a soft spot for kids and knowing your out there possibly getting hurt makes his uneasy

When you talk about science he finds himself happy cause your clearly passionate about the subject

Probably compliments you about your knowledge and pats you on the shoulder

He gives you nicknames in Spanish but his favourite is “pequeña araña” which means little spider

If you already know Spanish he’s 100% talking to you in it but if you don’t then he’s kinda teaching you by accident

For the love of god please say that your suit is properly insulated cause he’s gonna get grey hairs if he knows that your going out in Gotham during the winter freezing your ass off

Same for summer as well cause he knows that being in a head to toe bodysuit in the heat isn’t good

You met deadshot through his daughter Zoe by complete accident

Like you were swinging past some apartments while she was doing some homework she was stuck on and spotted you

And then she called out and you quickly ended up helping her with that homework

And that kinda became a weekly tradition where you’d just stop by on every Saturday to check her work and help her if she was stuck

During one of these he walks in as your perched near her window helping her with a math equation

He’s kinda confused for a minute until Zoe waves him over and says that you’d been her tutor for the past month

After that he kinda tracks you down on his own time as your having a burger on a building and talks to you

He thanks you and also asks why your doing the whole vigilante business as such a young age

You don’t tell him the full story but just enough where he gets a good picture as to why

Zoe becomes one of your fans and he has to say that it’s a lot better than her liking Batman or one of his robins lol

You still help her with homework but now you also show up to talk to her and her dad

She likes to brag to her father about how if she did good on her next test that you promised to make her a hoodie that resembles you suit

When he’s out on “jobs” he asks for you to check up on her and make sure she’s ok

more concerned than he lets on

When he gets put on the suicide squad he gets real upset if Amanda Waller even mentions you

Sometimes if you see him you like to him a wave which he gives back with a small smile

You have the honour of being one of the only heroes he likes

He likes that you stick up for the small guy, that your the “neighborhood hero” instead of the Gotham hero

Has definitely saved you numerous times without you even knowing

Feels old when you call him “mr.shot” even more so if you do something like backflip off a building

Like he subconsciously knows your ok but his dad senses are screaming at him and rushes over to the edge to see if your ok

He finds it really nice when you walk people home to make sure they feel safe

It’s a small thing but something a lot of people in Gotham appreciate since the streets at night aren’t the safest

You buy knock-off merch of heroes and give it out to kids but save the merch of you for his daughter

He now had a little keychain that he keeps on his person of your mask in inverted colours

It makes him chuckle quite a bit

No one dares put out a hit on you cause of him and Deathstroke

Speaking of which Deathstroke sought you out from seeing you one day whist in civilian clothes

You piqued his interest so when you were one day just swing around he was able to catch you by surprise even with your spidy-senses

Only for you to catch him off guard by how your somehow able to throw him off you like he was nothing

And then web him to a wall

Now you’ve really piqued his interest

Meanwhile your freaking out across from him and he’s just laughing and then congratulates you on getting the better of him

Que confusion

Oh yeah beforehand he quickly found out who you were

Yeah…not fun when he then brings that up

But anyways

Slade takes to basically full on training you cause he sees your potential

It’s weird at first but it quickly becomes routine for him to randomly drop by and give you lessons

It’s actually really useful especially since he also helps you hone your skills even more

Not to mention that he also helps you keep your identity a better secrets cause in his words “kid it’s honestly a miracle that the entire city hasn’t found out, your at least better than superman and his disguise”

At some point after a “exam” with him and you win he gifts you a completely upgraded suit as a gift

Your left confused but he just shrugs it off saying that you’d lived up to his expectations so you deserve something for that

Now your suit has proper heating! And it’s waterproof unlike before

He’s honestly not sure how you survived this long in your suit so he’s at least happy the new one he gifted you a better

Plus now you have extending spider arms that are super cool

Now you can more effectively hold up debris when saving people!

(Not their intended use but he supposes that you do you)

One thing he can’t fix is how trusting you are of others

Cause he’s tried countless times to teach you not to do that but your head it to thick for even his vastly worded criticism to break

Unlike him and Nightwing he’s had a very different dynamic with you Aka gruff dad and ray of Sunshine child

Aka the “someone will die” “of fun!”

He feels so old when your doing flips and every fucking acrobatic known to man

Like when Nightwing does it he feels a bit of his age but with you it’s worse

Rose jokes that your an honorary sibling now which makes you giggle as he standing behind y’all all stoic and such

Both swear they’ve never seen you without a smile or quippy remark despite having a broken rib

That’s why their surprised when you sometimes get a bit solemn or seem to hold an untold sadness in your eyes now more than ever

He doesn’t pry like he did when initially finding out your identity but he’s definitely worried

Mr.Freeze is someone you go out on your own to find after hearing how he was trying to find a cure for his wife’s illness

Your Aunt in her old age had been getting worse and you could tell she was gaining something that wasn’t an ordinary Illness

All hospitals you went to said they couldn’t do anything so you went to him instead

Which he certainly didn’t really expect

Like sure he’s heard of you but to suddenly had a teenage knock at his frost covered window to his lab at midnight is kinda unexpected

He’s guarded and ice cold as his name implies but seems to warm up once you mention your situation

How you didn’t know what to do, and that the hospitals turn her away for her older age or say that nothing was wrong when you knew it was

Your just a kid, one who is doing their best despite circumstances

And he from then on he knew couldn’t turn you away especially with how Nora wouldn’t want that

He finds your company to be nice especially once hearing that your brand of heroism is done to help out the average citizens of Gotham in their day to day lives

Your a change in his routine and life that he needs, someone to be a small bit of light in the ever encompassing darkness that fills his life

You help him as well in the lab, putting your science wiz knowledge to the test as you do your best to help

He enjoys the company quite a bit

Especially as you leave little notes (as usual) for him to find with little puns

He chuckles at all of them despite hot corny they are

As time goes on he sees the crack in your resolve though as his tests go nowhere

You push yourself though, to the limit to try and find something, anything

But it’s all for nought

There are times you fall asleep in full costume at his lab, he always places a blanket around your shoulders

Never once having the temptation to pull up the mask

He can tell your already going through the stages of grief before you even get the call that she’s gone

Just a feeling in your gut that it’s getting worse as you increase your work

And then it happens

That dreaded call that he can remember so vividly from his own when Nora had almost passed

Your silent, dead silent

And then like a gust of wind your off

He can only hear your soft sobs as you exit through a window and off into the night

He can only hope you’ll be ok, that you’ll turn out different from him in the grief that’s consuming you

Because unlike him your a ray of sun that the world needs compared to his somber moonlight

You end up crying on a rooftop

Shaky breaths ranking your form as you sob

But then you hear a scream from an alleyway which makes you pause

You pull your mask down and swing down to help

A woman pushed to the ground and two men standing over her loomingly

Their easy to take down but you got stabbed pretty badly in the side

You focus on her though, helping her up despite your limp and talking her through the anxiety attack she was having

You walk her home, blood dripping down though you do your best to hide it

Your voice hoarse from crying as you do your best to make her smile

And as she closes that door and you return to that rooftop you find that your vision is getting blurry and black dots dot the edges if your eyesight

You don’t have the strength to get up despite how hard you try

Because you have to

Cause as spider no matter how hard you get pushed down you always get up

Someone looms over you with an outstretched hand

You grab theirs and they hoist you up

You feel as if your in good hands

[808airsoftbros]

Under The Red Hood (S) (BXG) (Natty)

Author: This one is hella long just so you know and I just love Red Hood. Also if you want to check out more of my fics have a look at the Masterlist.

Y/N's POV

People say they know the definition of suffering... But what they don't know is feeling the end of it. I was abandoned by my parents and the one I looked up to as a father figure for that clown to torment and use me as his ragdoll.

I was left rotting in that abandoned wing of Arkham City for a damn year with that bastard. He beat me, stabbed me with a hot iron to mark that I forever belong to him, you name it.

Foolishly, I kept faith that Bruce would someday come to rescue me someday but that day never came.

"Tell me kid what is your name?"

My name is Jason Todd...

"Who do you hate?"

Batman

"Hahaha... Good... You hear that Bats? The kid is not yours anymore!"

"Hey, I never asked... Who is the big bad bats?"

Of course sir... His name is-

*bang*

That was the day Joker put my lights out and I thought finally after all that hell he put me through, it would be all over. But no. There was more.

After my death, the League of Assassins recovered my dead corpse and took me back to their underground lair.

Ra's Al Ghul has always used the so-called reviving gooey shit, the "Lazarus Pit, " which allowed him to live for over a thousand years, but he had a theory...

The Lazarus Pit doesn't just revive or recover an hosts injuries but it also has the power to bring life to the deceased.

However, when I was dropped into the pit, I wasn't myself, I was confused, forgotten who I am, and all I felt was agony. I became a monster.

I killed and destroyed everything that came my way, but eventually, I regained my composure and my memories and came back to a city absent of the so-called hero Batman.

To my surprise, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Tim Drake, and Damian Wayne were all gone too. Curious to find out what happened to them, I interrogated Gotham's street criminals and did some research on the internet.

Breaking News: Bruce Wayne Confirmed Dead in Fatal Car Accident

Turned out that the others were apparently with him during that accident but I knew better... It wasn't a car accident that killed them. It was something elise.

Luckily, I managed to get some information from Harley who was working at an adult entertainment restaurant and she didn't bother resisting since her beloved Mister Jay is dead too.

"You live under a rock or something? Bats and the whole gang were going all out in Ace Chemicals and Mister Jay as a result blew the whole facility taking not only his life but everyone present in the plant." She explained and I sighed.

"Thanks alot, Harleen," I thanked her and she rolled her eyes.

"Just the hell out. I don't want to see you again," She replied and I chuckled.

"Don't worry, you won't be seeing anytime soon," I assured as I got up from the table and exit the restuarant.

With that clown bastard gone, crime actually plummeted and the GCPD was able to finally handle themselves without Bruce assisting them everynight.

There wasn't much for me to do besides just watch over the city as my new identity the Red Hood. I don't exactly follow Batman's moral code of no killing.

Not every criminal is redeemable like the Joker, so I cannot fight crime without bashing some skulls in.

*bang*

"Where is Black Mask?" I sternly asked as I point the barrel of my gun at his forehead.

"I've got nothing to tell you!" And I bashed his skull using the bottom of the grip making him grunt in pain.

"Last chance," I warned as I pull back the hammer.

"Fine! I'll tell you! He's holding up at his tower east of Gotham! But you won't get to him!" He confessed.

"Thank you," I replied before knocking him out cold.

Calling in the Batmobile to my location, I jumped high in the air and landed in the cockpit, and drove off to Black Mask's tower.

Seeing that Bruce won't be needing his car or any of his assets anytime soon you mind as well put 'em to good use.

With the fast mobility and maneuverability to do sharp turns and drifts I got to the location of Black Mask in no time but I parked it into an dark alleyway to avoid losing the element of surprise.

Grappling onto the rooftop, I activate detective vision on my mask to see the inside of the building to get a recon on the number of goons.

"Great, this is going to be a massive waste of ammunition," I said to myself.

Using the line launcher to infiltrate the building I ride the ropes and broke through the massive glass window and catching Black Mask and his goons off guard.

"W-What the?! Who the hell are you?!" Black Mask asked as he drew out his pistol.

"Your worst nightmare," I answered as I smirked under my mask.

Swiftly drawing out my pistols, I shot the gun off his hand and in just a blink of an eye, neutralize the guards leaving him defenseless.

Grabbing Black Mask by the collar, I held him out of the broken glass window at my mercy and it pleasures me to see the look of fear in his eyes.

"P-Please I-I'll do anything you want! I can give you territory! Drugs! Money! Guns!" He begged.

"How about you go to hell?" I proposed and let go of him to fall to his death making him scream as he quickly descends to the streets.

"Say Hi to Joker for me," I said as I turn around to exit the building as my job here is done.

--------------------------------

Meanwhile...

???'s POV

Walking down the streets of Gotham City, it was surely more peaceful and quiet ever since the death of the notorious criminal Joker.

But that doesn't mean that all crime and corruption didn't stop lurking and hiding in the shadows.

This city needed a change or otherwise, it needs to be cleansed. There are so many orphaned children helpless in the streets and not even our full efforts is enough to save them.

How cruel humanity can be? Batman is no different... Even though he fights crime every night his ridiculous code doesn't solve the roots of the problem.

I did hear that the caped crusader along with his assistants are now gone after Joker suicide bombed Ace Chemicals. Good riddance to that evil doer.

However, just as I was sitting on the bench on the lookout for any orphaned child I heard a scream coming from above the building and soon after a man plummets on the streets to his death.

Everyone was shocked and screamed in horror as they were confused as to what was going on. Looking up I see a shattered window and what seemed to be a silhouette of a hooded figure.

Unfortunately, I was only able to get a glimpse of the figure until he disappeared into the building.

With police and EMS arriving at the scene, I decided to vacate the area for the night as I was unsuccessful to find any orphan children for the clan.

Utilizing my super speed abilities, I got back to my clan's hideout, I unlocked the door using my key and walked inside the house.

"Welcome home, Sister Ahnatchaya Suputhipong~!" Mother Kwon Eunbi greeted as she gently hugged me and I return the hug.

"Thank you, Mother Eunbi but just call me Natty. I've told you that how many times already?" I jokingly replied and she giggled.

"It's still a courtesy to greet you by full surname, sister," Eunbi-Unnie said and I nodded.

"From what I can see, you were not successful to bring a child," She mentioned.

"That may be true but I did see something of interest," I replied and she raised an eyebrow.

"Is that so?" She asked.

"Yes, mother," I simply answered.

"In that case, please do tell me every detail," She insisted as she guides me into the living room.

Recalling and explaining my encounter with this strange hooded figure and the falling-dead criminal Black Mask, she was intrigued by my encounter and wanted me to tell me more.

"Do you perhaps know what he exactly looked like?" She asked and I shook my head.

"I'm afraid no, he was too high up so I couldn't get a good look. All I could make out was that he was wearing a black and red leather jacket." I answered.

"Oh, that gives me an idea of who this mystery vigilante could be... There had been rumors going around in the criminal underworld that there is an anti-hero who calls himself the Red Hood." Julie-Unnie explained.

"Anti-hero? What's the difference between him and Batman?" Hanuel asked.

"Well, Red Hood actually kills criminals if he sees it necessary while Batman's righteous code forbids it," Julie-Unnie answered and she nodded.

"He could be a huge help for us, IF he agrees to that," Belle pointed out.

"In that case, we shall recruit Red Hood into our cause, but Natty seeing that you saw him first, you may claim him as his wife," Mother Eunbi settled and we all agreed.

--------------------------------

Y/N's POV

Heading into the Batcave, I parked the Batmobile on the platform, seeing the cave once again brings back memories of when I used to fight crime alongside Bruce and Dick.

Those were more simple times, until I was kidnapped by the Joker and tormented to death. Now, it's all lonesome with just myself and the bats lurking around the cave.

All the artifacts, souvenirs, and trophies were all still here like the giant robotic dinosaur that the museum owner gave to Bruce as a thank you present, the giant penny from battling two-face aka Harvey Dent, and the big ass clown card.

There was still some work to do in the Batcave and make some adjustments to the gadgets to my liking and come up with new tech.

*alarm*

"Who the hell could that be?" I wondered as I went to the bat computer to check the surveillance cameras.

Looking at the footage coming outside Wayne Manor, I see a woman in a black coat with pale milky skin, with black high heels, and what I could tell she was concealing two katanas.

Suddenly, she busts the front doors open and walked around the manor like she owns the damn place.

Deciding to confront the uninvited guest, I went to the elevator and ascend to the study room and quickly made my way into the ball room where the intruder is located.

Getting visual of the woman, I draw out my gun and fired a warning shot.

"Who are you? And what are you doing in Wayne Manor?" I sternly asked.

"Are you what they call Red Hood?" She asked and I raised an eyebrow.

"Are you fucking stupid? I asked you a question! Now answer it!" I angrily replied and she sighed.

"Now that is not how you greet your future wife~," She mentioned as she takes off her coat and sunglasses revealing her thicc figure.

"What's the matter~? Do you like my body that much~?" She teased and I shook my head.

"I have no time for games lady! Get the fuck out of my house!" I barked and her eyes turned a crimson red.

"Oh will be fucking soon, darling~. But first, will you cooperate?" She asked and I fired another warning shot.

"I guess not," She replied before drawing out her katanas.

Leaping in the air she dives toward me but I blocked it using the fins of my gauntlet. Attempting to shoot one of her kneecaps I missed as she misdirected the barrel of my pistol.

Giving me a turning kick in the stomach I stumbled back and in response I threw shurikens but she avoided them by leaning back.

"Silver ninja shurikens? Did you perhaps knew I was a Vampire?" She curiously asked.

"I'm always prepared for anything but I have a question..." I paused and she gave me a smuggly smile.

"I'm all ears," She replied.

"Do you bleed?"

Loading in hollow point incendiary silver 50 AE into my pistol, just one of these is enough te kill a Vampire and meet an unpleasant death.

Preparing a shock blast from my gauntlet, the Vampire charges toward me and once she was close enough I let her have it.

Taking this as my chance with her senses blinded I fired a shot and landed a direct hit on her knee causing her to scream in pain as she feels the burning sensation in her body.

"Hurts doesn't it? Just one bullet should've killed you already but you seem to be more persistent," I said before chuckling.

"Alright, darling, I didn't want to do this but it seems that I'll have to force you to submit to me," She angrily said and I smirked.

"I'd love to see you try, sweetheart," I replied.

Drawing out my combat knife which is also made of silver, I used my close combat knowledge against her whilst using my gun.

Indeed she's a tough cookie but I've faced tough opponents before and not once have I lost.

But she was starting to get more quicker and aggressive with her swings and even cut parts of my jacket. Which is hella expensive btw.

"Someone trained you well," She complimented.

"I can say the same for you," I replied.

Throughout our duel, I could catch a glimpse of her massive tits and ass. Clearly she takes care of her body and outshines any woman I've met in my life.

Starting to lose stamina and energy to fight while she was still energetic and vigilant. I knew I wasn't win this one so I have to come up with a plan.

"Just give up baby, there is no point in fighting," She insisted.

"I'm just getting started," I replied as I threw a smoke bomb.

"I can still see you," She mentioned as she casually walked through the smoke.

Attempting to grapple onto the gargoyle statue at the wall, she snatches the hook and crushes it with her bare hands. She's fucking strong that's for sure.

"Running out of tricks?" She asked.

Throwing a wave of shurikens she catches one by hand and deflects the others with her katana.

"You know you can't hit me," She mentioned.

"Who said I was?" I asked and the shuriken in her hand began to beep loudly and exploded.

However, she survived that and gave me a front kick in the stomach launching me into the wall. How much firepower can a Vampire take?!

I'm out of those special vampire hunting bullets leaving only my silver knife but that was knocked out of my hand and she soon pinned me to the floor.

"Looks like I've got you~," She said as she smirked.

"So what are you going to do? Kill me? Suck me dry of my blood?" I sarcastically asked and she shook her head.

"Oh no, darling, we don't feed anymore... We are not just Vampires anymore. We are Demi-Gods." She answered and I scoffed.

"Now, it's time to teach you who you belong to now," She whispered into my ear.

--------------------------------

Start of Smut

Y/N's POV

The Vampire who apparently is now my wife drags upstairs to the masters bedroom and pins me on the bed.

"Now let us see who you really are," She said as she grabs a hold of my mask and takes it off revealing my face.

"Wow, such a handsome face you were hiding~," She complimented as she examines my cheeks.

"Jason Todd, what's your name?" I curiously asked.

"Oh, how rude of me! My name is Sister Ahnatchaya Suputhipong but you'll refer to me as jagi, darling, or babe. Understand?" She instructed and I nodded.

"I want an answer, baby~," She whispered into my ear sending chills down my spine.

"Y-Yes mommy," I nervously replied and she giggled.

Locking lips with each other, she easily outclassed me as she was more experience in this while I've never kissed a girl in my life meaning she just stole my first kiss and soon my virginity.

Strangely, I put my hands around her hips as she goes under my shirt and I take my hands off her to take off my jacket and shirt revealing my chest.

"God, you're so sexy, I can't hardly believe this is all mine now~," She admires as she traces each line.

"Why don't you stop talking and let's get to it," I suggested and she smirked.

"I like how the way you think~," She replied.

Taking off her tight dress, revealing that she wasn't wearing any bra or panties and showed off her huge mounds and clean shaven pussy which instantly made my cock hard.

"Enjoying the view~? Good, because I'm going to make sure your balls are drained tonight~," She seductively said and I gulped.

Not wasting any time, she pulls down my pants along with my underwear and was surprised to see my ten-inch dick. Comparing my size to her head. It was a sight to see a beauty right by my cock.

"Uhhhhh~," I moaned.

Taking my length into her mouth, the tightness and the feeling of her tongue as she bobs up and down. I'd be lying if I said I haven't fell in love with this lusty Vampire.

What made it more exciting is that she kept eye contact with me the whole time she was blowing me and she switches position with her pussy on my face which is dripping wet and I can smell the aroma of candy.

Without hesitation I devour her pussy making her moan as she works on my cock tasting her was so addicting and we kept going until we came into each other's mouths.

"You taste amazing, baby~," She said after swallowing my load.

"I can say the same, it's so sweet that I just want more," I replied and she smiled.

Getting into position she sits on my dick before slowly inserting it in taking away my virginity and slowly begins riding me and it was fucking tight down there.

"Oh my God, you're so fucking huge baby, no man has ever stretched me out like this~!" She screamed as she increased her pace.

"Your fucking tight as hell!" I replied as I grabbed onto her hips to match her rhythm increasing the ecstasy.

After riding my dick for a bit, she decided to switch positions to missionary style.

"Now darling I want you to fuck my brains out! No more holding back!" She demanded and I felt like a beast inside of me has awaken.

"Fine, you want me to fuck you so hard until you can't walk! You got it!" I replied and she bit her lip.

Not giving her any time to get settled into the position I rammed her in and out as rough and fast as I possibly can making her scream out of pleasure.

Thankfully this room is soundproof and the manor is on an isolated island so nobody will be able to hear me fuck my slutty Vampire wife.

"Baby I'm so close~!" She warned.

"So am I!" I replied.

"Then let's cum together!" She said and we did just that.

"Hehe~. You still got more in there don't you~?" She asked and I viciously nodded.

Agreeing to go for another round, we switch position into doggy style and I rail her until she was screaming on top of her lungs.

"Keep going baby~!" She encouraged as I hit her G-spot.

Feeling the beast wanting more and more of her gorgeous pussy, I increased the pace and groped her ass whilst giving a few spankings increasing the pleasure.

"I want you to fuck me until I'm pregnant baby~!" She demanded.

"Oh, don't worry, I'll make sure that you'll get pregnant!" I assured.

Feeling the tightness of her pussy and fucking such a beautiful Vampire really takes my mind off my problems and traumas that I've been through in the past.

Maybe it was destiny that lead her into my home, guess I could use the company and she has an amazing body.

"I'm going to cum!" I warned.

"Good! I'm close too!" She replied.

In no time, I cum deep into her womb and we screamed one last time as I came inside of her and I felt my dick was in the shower.

"No I want you to keep it inside of me," She insisted as I was about pull it out.

Cuddling with each other on the bed despite it being all messy and wet from her juices, I was too tired and exhausted to care as long as I was in her arms.

--------------------------------

Natty's POV

It's been three days since I officially claimed Jason Todd aka Red Hood as my husband and partner in crimefighting. I still crave more of him but I have to let him rest.

Eventually he started opening up to me about his past life when he was the second Robin to Batman but was left to be tormented by the clown and how he was revived by the Lazarus Pit.

To this day, he still has Lazarus visions and behaves erratically at some nights but I can handle it with no issues whatsoever and he told me that he was grateful to have a loving wife like myself.

As for my clan, they continue to patrol the city for any abandoned children to take in while we clean up the streets for them.

Based on observation his abilities were growing faster, before he could take only ten men at a time but now he can take on about fifthy criminals at once.

With Jason being forged into my heart and soul, our relationship is eternal as I've granted him the gift of immortality.

"I love you my dear Jason~,"

[lonelynpc]

The Batfam as Medical Specialties

bruce wayne is an anaesthetist: you might say, “but, lonelynpc, bruce wayne would be a paediatrician,” to which i would say, "no". this man can pay attention to 1000 things at once. he’s writing in the anaesthetic record while listening to the monitors, singing his favourite song and listening out for close. he knows exactly what the patient's heart rate, sats, etc are from sound alone. he can recognise the most minute changes in the monitor’s sounds and will know exactly what it is that’s dropping or increasing without looking up. if he's standing up, you know there's something to be worried about. (brings cakes in from alfred for his team every day, don't @ me)

dick grayson is a trauma surgeon: this is because i am afraid of him and i am afraid of trauma surgeons. he’s terrifying and he works fast. he's an inexpressible comfort to people in his care, he regularly gets flowers or chocolates from families and patients. he’s lovely outside of work but at work, jfc can you stop glaring at me over the drapes? (also treats his entire team to dinner at the end of every month)

jason todd is a paediatric surgeon: i don’t wanna hear it. he definitely pimps his students, interns and residents for sport but the second he’s around his patients? he's "doctor jay". he’s got stickers in every pocket, fun scrub caps, a dragon stephoscope cover, a jelly finger monster on the end of his penlight and an endless supply of teddy bear tegaderms. he's got toy stephoscopes and teddy bears in his pockets at all times to give to the kids. he puts a bandage, wristband, hospital gown, mask and hairnet on patient's toys before they wake up as well.

barbara gordon is a cardiothoracic surgeon: she’s serious, intimidating and calculating. people look at her and wither. she’s yelling at interns for talking, pimping her med students about everything including her surgical playlist. you get a question wrong? “do some research. i’ll ask you again when i see you next,” and she will not forget so you better do that research. she's strict with patients because she cares and gets so excited when she sees/hears improvement.

tim drake is a radiologist: he’s glued to that damn screen and pounding back black coffee. he’s seeing the problem before you even know there is one. “oh, you don’t see that tiny hairline fracture with your novice eyes? you're pathetic, get out of my way. i’m getting you an ophthalmology consult.”

stephanie brown is an orthopedic surgeon: she’s a jock. i can’t explain it. she is a jock. she’s blasting the most absurdly mixed playlist, singing along and wearing her space suit and lead. she's fun and can tell you the exact injury and the severity just by hearing the mechanism of injury. no filter though smh, she'll tell her intern that they should get their back looked at after seeing their posture.

duke thomas is a neurosurgeon: can’t explain it but he is. he’s got the lights out and that headlamp on, nobody talk to him, he’s Looking™, did somebody breathe? who did that? own up so i can kick you out, you should be ashamed of yourself and your family.

cassandra cain is a general practitioner: i think she’d love being a general practitioner (family medicine). she’d like having regular patients, she'd like the variety and the payoff. alternatively, i'd say she'd like pallative care and providing comfort in end-of-life care.

damian wayne is an ob/gyn: look, let’s be real, he’s probably a vet but in human medicine? ob/gyn. he chews out residents but he also chews out partners in the room for being annoying during delivery. he has a chaperone with him 24/7 and will kick all non-essential personnel out of the room during an exam. also has mastered the old "oh, could you go sign the discharge forms at reception?" to get a partner out of the room so he can ask if the patient is safe going home.

[bolilloquemad0]

PT 2 LET'S GOOOO

We're back with Picking up Strays, get comfy!

(Go and check pt1 if you haven't)

Talia

With Talia, both me and Astro had different views on how she could end with a cat. So let's start with Astro's version.

They said that Damian could go with the pretense that he doesn't know how to take care of the cat (lie) or simply couldn't keep it with him, anyway Talia ends with a cat under pretense. Despite the League beliefs, Damian knows that Talia would take good care of the cat, and so mentions that the cat was mistreated by humans and Talia goes "Give it to me my son, I will take care of her".

Talia would go absolutely crazy with spoiling her princess, which she calls Arwa in honor of a Islamic queen. Arwa would have her own servants and everything, she really starts living as a queen. The 3 years old, brown-ish nebelung also has a ripped ear, consequences of her past, but Talia doesn't see it as a flaw. For Talia is proof of her resilience and warrior spirit.

For me tho, it goes a bit different. Damian wants to give her a cat, he really wants, but he knows how pets are seen in the League. A weakness. And Damian knows what happens when weakness is shown. So, for now, Damian sends her pictures of Arwa without any context.

Talia is confused, but happy nonetheless that Damian is reaching out. Even if is through cat photos. After a few photos and noticing that is always the same cat, Talia asks about it and Damian responds, "Is yours."

Damian may have not been living with her for a long time, but he's still her son. Talia doesn't know the exact reason, but she knows what it implies.

"May I know her?"

"TT. Fine."

Talia still falls in love with Arwa, and she still becomes the spoiled queen Arwa was destined to be. After that, almost everyday Damian receives a photo of Arwa.

Barbara

Barbie is next cause everyone loves Barbara Gordon.

This goes actually diferent. Babs has seen the cat in her neighborhood before. Always in the same alley and running around, with food in his mouth that definitely is stolen, she even has seen the cat sleeping in that broken stairs that no one uses in her building. So, she is quite familiar with the orange tabby that wanders here and there.

But after four days of not seeing him, Babs finally calls Robin to help her. She know is a personal matter but also knows that Damian is her best option to at least make sure the cat is fine. Damian finds him hurt, probably by a dog attack, and is quick to take him to the vet.

A month later, when Babs arrives at her apartment Damian is waiting for her with all the necessities a cat may need. One look at the purring tabby on her couch and Babs finally understands why everyone else accepts the cats.

Babs decides to call the 2 years-old Jesse, honoring Jesse James (a famous robber way back in history). Jesse, as any other orange cat, is a whirlwind of energy. He specially likes stepping into her laptop everytime Barbara is working, she gently lifts him and puts him on the floor but he doesn't care, Jesse just tries again. That's it until Babs pulls out a old rusty laptop that she no longer uses and opens it when she is working. Jesse is so happy to have his own laptop.

Once, she decides to take Jesse with her at the library, partly worried but she can't let him in the apartment for whatever reason. Surprisingly enough, Jesses always stays calm and friendly, letting kids pet him. She finds him sleeping on shelves or close to the windows always under the sunlight. She starts taking him to work with her and you bet she even made him a credential.

Jesse's habits die hard tho. He still brings a lot of weird shit to Babs as gifts. Dead small animals, trinkets and random stuff she doesn't know what to do with. One day he brings a whole ass wallet.

Tim

No one is more surprised than Tim. Not only he receives a cat, but as a birthday gift too? Wow, he definitely didn't cried.

The cat in question is a 2 years old, siamese oriental shorthair. Really thin and lanky. The cat has this air of elegance at every step.

At first he wants to name him Ghost or something like that, but Kon (joking) says that that's no name for the heir of the Drakes. Tim takes it too seriously and he names the cat a super rich-kind name.

He ends with Sir Konrad The Third Archduke of the Couch.

This name has so many jokes on it. Firts is Konrad, at the beginning it was with C (Conrad) but Astro pointed out that it could also be pronounced with a K, as a reference to Kon, that way it can also be read as Kon-rad (he was so happy about it, saying that Konrad was also his son). The Third stands cause Tim is the third Robin. And Archduke of the Couch just because Konrad is a heavy sleeper that barely leaves the couch.

Bringing back the thought of Konrad being a heavy sleeper that love warm places to sleep, so picture this with me fam. Tim is working on the couch, focused on a case, and probably hasn't seen his bed since two days ago, suddenly he notice that he needs something that is upstairs or in another room, the problem is that the cat is sleeping in his lap, and he looks so comfy, so if Tim moves he would probably wake him up and now he is trapped on the couch.

Ten minutes later he is sleeping in the couch with a cat on his lap. This repeats a lot, so Konrad is actually helping Tim with his sleep schedule. Bonus points for all the pics that the batfam have of Tim and Konrad sleeping together.

When Steph gets her cat, eventually, Korand and Steph's cat has the worst relationship ever. They literally can't stand eachother.

[cluelessatthispoint]

tf2 Mercs Babysitting Style

Heavy: He likes kids and has a lot of experience helping his mother to raise his sisters. He dreams of one day starting a family and having one or two children. When babysitting he understands that he is much larger than the child and tries to make himself seem smaller so he doesn't scare them too bad. He is a patient and caring babysitter, but he is a firm believer in following the rules. Candy before dinner? No thank you!

Soldier: Do not let him near your kids. He will give them a buzzcut and bring them raccoons to play with. He means well, he really does, but if you want him to babysit your kids at least ask if Demo can come along as well. Demo can easily tone down the chaos that Soldier brings. Soldier, in general, likes kids, he doesn't have any experience in babysitting but he thinks that it can't be that much different from ordering around troops. Oh, how wrong he is.

Spy: He will leave them in front of the television and walk away. Every now and then he will check in on the kids and make sure that they didn't hurt themselves. Even though he says that he doesn't like kids he will make sure that they eat a delicious and nutritious meal that would put Gordon Ramsey to shame. Being around kids makes him uncomfortable, it makes him think of all the missed opportunities that he could have had with his son growing up.

Sniper: He is used to being alone. His only experience with kids is that he used to be a kid himself. Does the child want food? does the child need water? Does the kid have to go number one? or number two? He doesn't know. One thing is for sure though, that child (if well-behaved) will be kept safe and sound. If the kid is a brat he will leave them with Heavy. He loves to teach the kid how to hunt for food and the perfect way to cook and eat grasshoppers.

Scout: He is pretty much a child himself, he knows that a kid needs food, water, and entertainment in order to be happy and healthy. He will be very awkward around the child at first. He tries to show off how confident he is, but the kid will not be fooled; even a baby can see through his false bravado. He starts off with comics and magazines, then the T.V. when that doesn't work he makes the kid a sandwich and takes them outside to play some catch. The child will have the most fun with Scout, but Scout will be panicking the whole time.

Pyro: He likes kids, heck! He loves spending time with them, but if on the off chance you want your kid to end up crispier than a burnt piece of texas toast please consider leaving your child with Heavy or even Soldier.

Demoman: He is a little concerned about being a babysitter. He is a demolition expert, he builds bombs for a living! Even a child at first glance could probably tell that he is as drunk as a skunk. Still, he has that "friendly" atmosphere about himself. Since he makes bombs for a living his hands are extremely dexterous. He knows how much pressure to apply to a child's hand for a handshake and he knows how to apply band-aids the correct way. Does he like babysitting? Not as much as he likes to blow things up. Will he ever consider babysitting in the future? he might, he is a DeGroot! And DeGroots like having multiple jobs! Besides, deep down he really is a softie.

Medic: Is one of the last people that should even be near a child. He has a lot of knowledge of childcare and knows what to do if they're sick, or it they got hurt. But emotionally... not so much. He's very desensitized to gore and forgets that most normal people much less children can handle the sight of blood. He will probably ask the child to help retrieve something from the fridge and eventually scar them for life with all the various organs he has mixed in with the canned drinks. Does he like kids? he thinks that they are okay. He has no patience for them really. But if Heavy and Medic were trusted to take care of the child, then they will work together to make the child feel safe, loved, and comforted til their parents come back.

Engineer: He has a lot of dangerous doo-hickeys in his workshop, so a day in there is a no-no. He will gladly keep the child entertained with stories of his youth or old folktales that his Grandfather used to tell him back when he was a little boy. If stories don't do the trick, then perhaps a song or two on his trusty guitar might pique the child's interest. He tries to form a bond with the child by building with Legos or building blocks. If the kid suggests building a pillow fort then Engie will always be free to babysit whenever you're busy. He will teach the child how to build the most effective pillow fort, capable of withstanding strong winds, loud noises, and Soldier's raccoon attacks.

[mieeaahhh]

How I view all for the game characters but it’s just pictures! (Updated version + some useless head-cannons)

Renee Walker

-Andrew helps her whenever she re-dyes her hair

-transgender mtf 🗣️🗣️🗣️

-he has a few smaller tattoos other than the wings on her back but she got them in ‘hidden’ places

-is really bad at video games

-has a pet rabbit named Barney that lives back at home with her mum

Allison Reynolds

-has been collecting shoes since she was thirteen and has a matching pair for every single outfit she owns

-her love languages are gift giving and acts of service

-has a diary that she still uses from when she was eleven

-she has one of those ‘upside down smiles’ or whatever it’s called

-low-key had an emo phase but if you bring it up she’ll post your home address and card information on social media. How? A magician never reveals his secrets🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

Neil Josten

-desperately needs braces but couldn’t care less about getting them so his teeth are messed up

-can do that frog blinking thing

-can cook and is actually really good at it but doesn’t enjoy it

-he would’ve been a chronic scooter kid if he grew up like a normal person

-has the face of someone with zero thoughts, eyes wide and face flat

Andrew Minyard

-the only reason he doesn’t wear his glasses is because he actually lost them years ago and doesn’t want to admit he can’t find them anywhere

-when he was a little kid he was actually really shy

-when his nail varnish chips he just paints back over it instead of taking the rest off before hand and it’s usually kinda messy

-since he has smoker lungs™️ whenever he’s sick it actually sounds like if a teenage boy going through puberty smoked twelve boxes a day

-only got piercings because Aaron had them and he thought they looked cool and he only really started finding his ‘style’ after moving in with Aaron and Nicky

Kevin Day

-has the LOUDEST snore ever but denies that he snores at all

-the foxes all tease him and have inside jokes about his ‘crush’ on Jeremy

-almost everyone and their mother has numerous videos of his drunkenly singing his heart out and it’s usually something like bohemian rhapsody or some basic ‘white chick’ music

-in the nest his hair was always trimmed and neat but when he left he let his hair grow a bit and just left it to flop around and do its own thing

-will literally stop, drop and roll in tears if a spider goes near him

Aaron Minyard

-growing up he was considered a ‘crybaby’ by a few people because he cries or gets teary when frustrated/angry

-has fallen out the bed so many times it’s ridiculous and then will wonder how he wakes up with random bruises (my other post about his weird sleeping🗣️🗣️🗣️)

-has a fear of cats

-Aaron’s eyesight is a lot worse than Andrews

-Randy often asks Matt to invite Aaron over during the holidays and stuff once Matt and Aaron become closer (they are best friends idc)

Seth Gordon

-he likes when Allison is the big spoon but that’s a secret for them and them only

-had a pet hamster named Jerry who ran away when he was a kid

-DAHLIA PIERCINGS🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

-he was the sibling that turns off the lights and holds the door closed to scare his siblings

-Allison was the first (and last) girlfriend he was truly inlove with

Matt Boyd

-gives THE BEST hugs🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ I mean like lifting people off the ground in big bear hugs kinda hugs🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂��↕️

-buys flowers for Dan everytime he goes to the shops

-he and Andrew do become somewhat friends at some point

-he the best at video games AND board games out of all the foxes

-he has very subtle freckles in his nose

Dan Wilds

-GUMMY SMILEEEEEE!!!!!!!

-she and her work sisters used to do secret Santa every year and she was known for the best/most meaningful presents

-she’s one of those people who hit when they laugh

-her favourite Disney princess growing up was Snow White

-she is absolutely COVERED in beauty spots/moles

Nicky Hemmick

-used to be very lanky before joining the foxes but ended up gaining some muscle after awhile

-he doesn’t like his hair being played with but he LOVES playing with other peoples hair

-has a resting worried/shocked face and the foxes find it hilarious

-would rather go bald than eat chocolate cake

-acts like the world is ending and his immune system is shutting down whenever he has a cold

[theresawritesstuff]

MidgeLenny: “Less apologizing. More kissing.”

(this one got steamy)

New Year's Eve 1960

She slipped quietly up to the open bar, her sights set more on the familiar figure standing there than they were on procuring herself a cocktail.

"Fancy seeing you here."

She smirked to herself at the surprise on his face as Lenny turned around, her sneak attack successful.

Still, she kept her tone casual. "Would have thought you'd be ringing in the new year on a beach somewhere instead of back in another blizzard."

Lenny chuckled, waving the bartender over for her. "Beaches are overrated."

She arched a curious brow at him, waiting to see if he felt like giving her any further explanation.

He smiled sheepishly, continuing, "Gordon invited all the guests of the show that were on this past year. My manager thought it would be a good idea. Try to play nice and all that."

"I see," she replied, accepting her martini from the bartender.

He leaned an elbow on the bar, coming in a little closer. "The real question is what brings you here? Because I am quite certain I would have remembered seeing you next to that desk."

She took a swig from her glass. "I work here."

"No kidding."

"Yep. Gordon's resident lady writer as of about a month ago."

His brow quirked, considering his reply.

"Congratulations."

"Thank you."

"So we should look forward to seeing you take your rightful place in the guest chair in the coming new year," he surmised.

Midge let out a humorless chuckle. "That was the idea the way Susie pitched it. Unfortunately, it would seem my comedy was not the set Gordon was interested in when he hired me."

Lenny hummed a monosyllabic reply into his drink.

A brief note conveying so much. Disapproval of her boss being a slime ball, understanding why he was, and how much it must suck for her to deal with day to day…

Honestly she was used to having to make men take her seriously for more than her looks. She'd been doing it her whole life.

She just hadn't realized how much worse it would feel, how much lonelier she would feel facing it after having someone see her, value her, adore her for all that she was like Lenny had…

"Speak of the devil…" Lenny murmured, noting Gordon approaching from across the room.

"Ah fuck." Midge downed the rest of her martini, bracing herself.

His brow lifted almost imperceptibly at the sudden shift in her posture.

She glanced up at him tentatively. "Know any good excuses a gal can use to get out of dancing with her boss?"

He exhaled thoughtfully, glancing over her shoulder to gauge Gordon's arrival.

"I might know one," he replied. "But you'll have to trust me."

"I always have."

He looked into her eyes then, struck by how immediate and decisive her answer had come.

He didn't have the chance to comment.

"Lenny! Good to see you again," her boss greeted warmly, an empty champagne glass in his hand.

"Gordon." Lenny nodded curtly into his whiskey.

"I see you've met our latest addition to the writers room," Gordon commented.

Lenny smirked, setting his glass aside. "Well I generally try to seek out the funniest person in the room at these shindigs for the sake of my sanity."

His arm wrapped around her, hand settling on her hip in a gesture that skirted the line between friendly and just a little bit possessive.

She was more than happy to let him, already feeling that much safer.

"Lenny's an old friend," she explained vaguely, drifting comfortably closer to further illustrate the point.

God he smelled good…

Gordon blinked. "I didn't realize you two were acquainted."

Lenny fought back what she knew to be a very bad smile. "You could say that."

"Uh-huh…" Gordon set his glass on the bar, obviously having a hard time reconciling this fact. "How exactly did you two meet?" 

"Hebrew school," Midge replied brightly, placing a hand along Lenny's back.

Lenny almost broke but covered his laughter by clearing his throat.

Just then the band picked back up, playing the strains of a familiar tune.

"'Scuse us," Lenny smirked, taking the excuse to lead her away out onto the makeshift dance floor.

"There. Consider your dance card full," he drawled.

Midge shook her head, smiling as her hand found its familiar hold at the back of his neck.

"That was your plan. 'I asked her first'?" she laughed.

"I did ask you first," he reminded her. "Back in Miami."

"Ah yes, when I had a hair out of place. You didn't ask, by the way. Just told me that we were going to after a lot of staring."

"The question was implied," he chuckled at her ribbing. "Either way, it worked."

"Yes it did."

All too well she was afraid to admit.

"How am I doing now? I haven't lost a step, have I?"

His tone was playful but she could tell what he was really asking. 

Were they okay now? Or has things at Carnegie ruined his chances with her?

"Oh I think you'll pass," she assured him. "Only way to find out is to keep dancing, though."

"That worried Gordon would try to cut in?" he chuckled, holding her a little tighter.

"Not really. I just…"

A blush crept into her cheeks as she considered the feeling of her hand in his.

"It's nice dancing with you again," she admitted.

"I concur."

He brought her arm up gently, holding it steady just as he had before.

He swayed her quietly for a while before commenting, "You know, we never did find out when they scheduled the ritual sacrifices, did we."

She let out a laugh, resting her head against his collarbone as she recovered. "No I suppose we didn't."

"Something to keep us awake at night," he mused.

As if they needed any more of that.

She looked up to study his face. 

He looked good. Healthy. A little more color to his face than when she'd seen him last. But there was a look behind his eyes she knew all too well. 

"How are you really doing, Lenny?"

He smirked, shrugging in her arms. "Oh you know…Trying to balance work and being a parent, constantly hearing my mother criticize my choices in both."

"I know the feeling…" she murmured.

"It's good though. Or it will be, I think. Eventually. Except..."

He let out a sigh, suddenly looking self conscious.

"Sometimes I still find myself missing the snow. I've grown sort of fond of it."

She smiled softly, looking out at the eddies swirling past the windows. 

"Me too."

One dance led into another.

They talked about their kids, about work, about life, and sometimes not at all if only just to enjoy not having anything funny to say, until the hours on the clock dwindled away.

She'd missed him. God had she missed him.

Judging by the way his hands never left her, she had a feeling he'd missed her too.

A few more songs and another trip to the bar had her cuddled against his shoulder along the outskirts of the party, melting into his embrace, feeling content and safe and just this side of impulsive as the clock counted down.

She looked up into his eyes, fingertips trailing lazy patterns along the nape of his neck, itching to feel the soft curls just above it.

His gaze drifted to her lips and suddenly she barely registered the din of the crowded room just beyond them. 

"Five…Four…three…two…one!"

Her lips found his like it was the most natural thing in the world, as if midnight was theirs alone to share.

She felt his hand tangle in her hair and it was all she could do not to come undone.

He broke away breathlessly, his forehead resting against hers.

"I'm sorry," he murmured.

"I'm not," she replied, pulling him back in hungrily.

He moaned against her lips, gripping her closer until his willpower won out and he pulled away again, just enough to speak, shaking his head. "I meant for before. How we left things. I should have called. I should have–"

“Lenny. Less apologizing. More kissing," she insisted.

He nodded, shutting up in favor of letting her nibble on his lower lip, pressing her against the wall.

A chorus of auld langs ide reminded them belatedly that they were not in fact entirely alone.

"I don't suppose you know somewhere a little more private we could go…" he ventured.

Midge bit back a smirk, slipping her hand into his as she led him out the door and out into the hall.

His lips were on hers in an instant, following blindly as they retreated, eventually finding their way into an unlocked office.

They tumbled down onto the soft leather couch, hands roaming in search of skin.

"Missed you," she whispered between kisses as she straddled his lap. "Missed this."

A low chuckle rumbled in his chest as his hand teased its way up her thigh. "Sweetheart, you have no idea."

She was just about to get to work on his belt buckle when the door to the office clicked open.

Mike blinked at them from the doorway, wobbling slightly on his feet.

"Midge?"

She didn't think to move. It was all she could do not to break into a fit of giggles. 

Gordon had sprung for the good champagne.

"Yeah?"

"What're you doing in George's office?" the booker asked.

Lenny cleared his throat.

"Me, I believe was the intent," he quipped, still pinned beneath her, looking rather disheveled and happy for her efforts.

Mike craned his neck slightly, squinting into the dimly lit room. "Oh, hey Lenny."

"Thanks for the invite."

"What are you doing in George's office, Mike?" Midge wondered, hoping it would be enough to distract him away from having a word with human resources when he sobered up.

"I was gonna throw up in his desk," he admitted without remorse.

Midge let out a laugh. "Okay then."

She got to her feet, righting the hem of her dress before helping Lenny to his feet.

"You want us to stick around to hold your hair back? Get you some water or anything like that?" she asked.

Mike had become somewhat of a begrudging friend since she was hired. Sort of a grumpy adopted older brother figure.

He was a good guy.

She figured it was the least she could do to offer.

The fact that it made it less likely that he'd rat her and Lenny out was beside the point.

"Nah," Mike waved her off. "You kids have fun…Just not here."

Lenny gave the other man a lazy salute, taking Midge by the hand. 

"So… Where to now?" he asked once they were out in the hall.

Midge smiled, adjusting the lapel of his jacket. "That depends. Are you going to run away again if I bring you back to the upper west side?"

He shook his head, grinning as he tucked a loose strand of hair back in place behind her ear.

"Not a chance."

[itsallmadonnasfault]

Thurston Moore on Madonna: ‘She had credibility, she was really ahead of the game’

The former Sonic Youth frontman remembers her emergence from New York’s underground scene.

We were neighbours. We knew each other, by sight. She would say hi to me and I would say hi to her. She was dating a friend of mine for a millisecond, so we were introduced that way and then, through the years, when we’d cross paths on the street, we’d nod heads and smile. She was very friendly with Jean-Michel [Basquiat], Keith Haring, and these artists who were all our neighbours, and we all hung out at the same places: Danceteria, CBGB, Tier 3 and Club 57 were the main places. When she became super-famous, which was all of a sudden, she disappeared from the New York scene. It was a very strange thing, to be working washing dishes, and making pennies per day, and seeing someone who was in your neighbourhood all of a sudden become a superstar. It was unusual. There was no real model for that, for us. It became kind of exciting.

She was really ahead of the game. She was taking elements of what was cool at that time – punk rock, new wave, dance music, hip-hop and Latino music all clashing in this great non-hierarchical playground of New York. It was all kind of new; everybody was trying different things. Madonna was actually in a couple of no-wave bands that nobody ever talks about. She was in a band with these two twins, Dan and Josh Braun, who were the first members of Swans, Michael Gira’s band. Nobody really knows about that part of her history; she was in a pre-Swans no wave band! There’s all that interconnected history in New York with Madonna and the no wave scene.

She was really able to tap into the sound of what was genuine and the culture at the time, where it was free from any gender or sexual persuasion distinctions. There was no concern about any inequality or [the boundaries of] gender or race – that’s how we felt, it was totally revolutionary. And [there was] this balance between Latino, black and white culture on the scene. She was really significant in giving voice to that and consistently doing it – you never got the sense that she was doing it as a gesture of being hip. She was a person, I think, who was really very loving toward people who were historically disenfranchised by society.

We actually embraced Madonna’s joie de vivre, her celebrity. We did that record and everybody felt we were crazy, and some people lambasted us for giving her some kind of credibility in the underground. But she already had credibility, as far as I was concerned; she was already a part of the downtown scene. I don’t think she capitalised on it.

When we first came to London, Lee [Ranaldo], Kim [Gordon] and I wore Madonna shirts and I remember kids at the gig coming up to us and saying “Are you taking the piss?” and we would say “No, have you heard this Madonna album? You should listen to it next to your Swell Maps albums, next to your Wire albums, next to your Raincoats albums.” Mix it up. Don’t be stuck in some kind of tunnel. I was all about bringing people together. Plus the T-shirts were really cheap.

Actually, I think she was very dignified in the way she referenced all of these different subcultures. She was a very big part of it. She made a lot of money, and when you make a lot of money and become so famous you have to protect yourself, because everybody wants to claw at you. It’s not like she could just walk into a Tesco and buy milk; she’s going to get hammered. People who bring that in to their lives… it’s a mixed blessing. It does prohibit you from being free in the social world. I think she dealt with it really well, let’s put it that way.

[mrs-dr-reid]

My Personal Dean Winchester Headcanons

Part 1/?

FOREHEAD. KISSES. If this man doesn’t kiss your forehead at least 15 times a day, he might die. He MUST ALWAYS kiss your forehead, whether he’s saying “hi”, “good morning”, “I love you”, “I missed you”, “goodnight”, “how are you?”, whatever the occasion or conversation, you bet your ass a forehead kiss is coming with it

You get him a record player for Christmas the year after you guys start living in the bunker because you found two gigantic boxes of vinyls in a storage closet, and now whenever he’s cooking, researching with you and Sam, or cleaning his guns/knives/other objects that kill things, he’s listening to his records

Will take any opportunity to get his hands on you in both every day and nsfw situations. Whether it be putting his hand in your back pocket while walking somewhere, kicking Sam from the shotgun seat solely so he can hold your hand while he’s driving, throwing you over his shoulder while you’re doing chores and forcing you to snuggle with him, or kissing your neck while you’re doing stuff because he’s a horny little shit, he’s gonna do it

During really long stretches between hunts when you guys are just hanging around the bunker not doing anything, he organizes “Nostalgic Media Nights” with popcorn and snacks and the works, where he either locates an old cartoon, movie, or sitcom from when y’all were kids/teens on a streaming platform or bootlegs it, and y’all sit down in the living room to watch it, and it doubles as an “Introduce Cas To Mortal Pop Culture Night” as well. He nearly threw up when Cas said he genuinely enjoyed One Tree Hill when the rest of you guys only put it on to make fun of how bad it was

All of his flannels are organized in his closet in the order of how much he wears them, with the most often worn on the left and the least often worn on the right. Sam hates it and always tries to arrange them by color, but he just puts it right back claiming his system is better anyway

Very handy. He always fixes things in the bunker before you or Sam even notice that they’re broken, and you only learn that they were broken when you ask him what he did that day and he offhandedly mentions that he fixed a thing

He collects vintage cookbooks. He finds them in thrift stores and at flea markets, and a couple times a month you three pick a random book and scour through it to find the most offensive and war crime adjacent recipe you can and try it out. You all like jello much less than you did before you started this tradition

When he gets sick, he’ll deny it and try to keep on trucking until he actually passes out from exhaustion, so you have to borderline barricade him in his room to make sure he stays in bed and gets some rest. And he’s a total grump about it, but he’ll still thank you quietly when you bring him ginger ale and tomato rice soup like his mom used to make

He watches cooking shows for the sole purpose of shit talking the contestants. It’s hilarious to watch him while he’s watching Hell’s Kitchen, because he turns into an American Gordon Ramsay and just roasts the hell out of all the competitors. But when he’s watching Great British Baking Show? He was once heard saying, “Oh come on, Barbara, those bagels are flat as hell! STEP UP YOUR GAME, WOMAN, OR YOU WON’T LIVE TO SEE THE END OF BREAD WEEK!”, and you and Sam proceeded to die laughing

He sings in the shower, but he does it in a way that he puts on a SHOW in the shower. He exclusively listens to hair metal while he’s in the shower, and he acts like he’s actually on stage with all of his favorite artists while washing his pits. Although one time you did hear him singing along to "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift, and you had to fight every urge you had to not record him for blackmail purposes

When he sleeps by himself, he starfishes on his stomach so he can reach the gun under his pillow easier. But when he sleeps with you, he lays on his back with an arm slung around your waist while you’re partially sprawled over him and snuggled into his chest

He’s very bi. Sam always makes jokes that Cas is his boyfriend, but you’re his wife, which always earns a “Confused Angel Head Tilt™️” from Cas, an eye roll from you, and a facepalm from Dean

He taught himself Morse code on a whim because he was bored out of his mind, and for a while he was able to get away with making fun of Sam or “creating chick flick moments” for you, but then you and Sam taught yourselves Morse code and totally call him out on his attempt at being sneaky

He’s absolutely TERRIBLE about keeping New Year’s Resolutions. He makes a list, and he actually follows them for a while as lofty as they end up being, but come February 1st, he’s back to being the same dumpster fire of a human being he was before, but he still gives himself a pat on the back for lasting as long as he did

He’s secretly a cat person. He loves dogs, but he has to admit that cats are badasses. He’s never met a cat that he didn’t immediately like, and cats seem to gravitate towards him because they share his “no fucks given” attitude

He’s insanely good at guessing games like Guess Who, Charades, Pictionary, all that shit. You guys even came up with a way to play Guess Who where the questions you ask are almost too oddly specific based on the vibes of the little character cards, and he still always wins

His favorite way to kiss you is with both of his hands in your hair with your hands on his elbows. He always trails a few cheeky pecks down your neck for fun because he loves it when your cheeks flush bright red when he does

He always texts you to let you know he was thinking about you and what prompted his thoughts. Like “Saw a really pretty sunset earlier. You’re really pretty, too, so I thought of you” or “Saw a really cool car in your favorite color. Made me think of you”, and he always tacks on either a heart emoji or the “<3” because he’s an old man. You can’t help but smile every time you read one of those messages

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Rewrite 1

Spoilers for the first 2 episodes under the cut.

All things considered, she’s feeling pretty good in her Susie-approved outfit, heading for Rockefeller Center on that crowded train.

It’s not until she peers into the training running alongside her own that her heart skips a beat.

Dark hair.

Trench coat slung over his arm.

A small child’s hand gripped in his own.

They lock eyes and he gives her the most tired grin she has ever seen in her god-damn life. Midge can’t help smiling back.

He nods for her to exit her train, and soon they’re meeting on the platform.

“What happened to the west coast?” She asks, bewildered but still smiling. She just can’t help herself.

He chuckles hollowly. “It uh…it didn’t work out.”

“That was fast.”

“Gramma Sally got us deep sixed,” the little girl attached to Lenny’s leg announces, making him laugh.

“My mother decided to throw me a big show business party,” he explains. “And uh…one of her very talented show business friends started a wildfire behind the house.”

“Oh my god, was everyone okay?” Midge asks, looking alarmed.

“Somebody lost an eyebrow, but other than that, LA’s bravest got it under control pretty quickly,” Lenny shrugs. “But uh…Like Kit said. It got us thrown out. So…at least for now, we’re gonna hang around here. I found a decent apartment in the Village for us. We’ll see how things go.”

“We got our deposit back!” the little girl chirps.

Lenny chuckles a little and turns to the little blonde. “Most of it.” He turns back to Midge. “This is my kid. Kitty. Kit, this is Daddy’s nice friend Midge.”

“You’re pretty,” Kitty says. “I like your skirt.”

Midge beams and swishes the red and black plaid skirt. “It’s a sitting skirt.”

Lenny gives her a confused look. “As opposed to…?”

“I got this job and I won’t be standing very much, so I needed a skirt that looked good while I was-“she stops talking and takes a breath. “I got a gig on Gordon Ford’s writing staff.”

“The couch potato brigade,” Lenny grins, his eyebrows lifting. “Cushy.”

“I guess we’ll see,” Midge shrugs. “It’s my first day. Where are you off to?”

“We are dropping Kitty off at her new school,” he tells her. “And then I have a meeting with a new lawyer, since the west coast isn’t happening.”

She nods, giving him an encouraging smile. “Good luck.”

“Thank you. Supposedly this guy is really something. Kessler.”

Midge lights up. “I know Michael Kessler. He’s represented me before, and he’s friends with my father.”

“I will be sure to name drop,” Lenny promises. “But we have to go. It’s apparently a bad look if your child is late for kindergarten.”

“A disaster,” Midge agrees. “Have a good day, Kitty.”

Kitty waves and keeps holding onto Lenny. “Bye, Miss Midge.”

She’s about to get back on the train when Lenny reaches out, almost taking her hand but stops. Midge turns to look at him curiously.

“I know…I know we sort of…” he fumbles with his words, ducking his head. “I know you said we don’t-“ he stops again, looking at her hopefully. “But maybe we could.”

Midge smiles slowly. “How about I bring dinner by tomorrow night as a housewarming gift?” she offers.

“You don’t have to-“

“I’ll need your address,” she tells him.

He takes a breath and gives it to her, and she nods, committing it to memory.

“I’ll see you tomorrow night after the show,” she promises.  

“Bye, Midge,” Lenny says softly, gazing at her gratefully.

She smiles and kneels briefly to fix Kitty’s little hat. “There. Perfect.” She gets up, leaning in and kissing Lenny’s cheek before heading back for the train.

Behind her she can hear Kitty’s little voice as they head for the stairs out of the station.

“She’s nice. I’m glad she’s coming over to see us.”

“Yeah, Kit. Me, too.”

Midge takes a deep breath, and heads for work.

[distort-opia]

oh now im intrigued by your thoughts on who are bruce’s best friends in your opinions 👀

...You know, in the end, I think it actually might be Alfred. And that's because, if you think about it at length, Bruce has not had ONE SINGLE FRIEND who hasn't either 1) betrayed him, 2) attacked him/tried to kill him, or 3) both. And that's leaving aside the friends he had as a kid who died.

Thomas Elliot? Steals his face and tries to kill him. Harvey Dent? Gets disfigured and becomes a villain and tries to kill him. Then you've got Clark Kent and Minhkhoa Khan, but both have physically fought Bruce and tried to kill him. In Clark's case it was under the effects of mind control or kryptonite or whatever, but it happened. It's arguable how different actions Clark participated in were considered a personal betrayal by Bruce (e.g., the infamous JLA decision to wipe Bruce's memory, or Clark taking on Bruce's memories post Superman: Emperor Joker). Which brings me to Zatanna, perhaps the only childhood/teenage years friend Bruce has who hasn't tried to kill him, but who did deeply betray him (again, the mind wipe incident). There's even that one time Bruce thought he made a new vigilante friend in Baphomet, but actually it was Onomatopoeia (a villain who betrays him).

And it isn't just friends, at the end of the day. Bruce has physically fought off attacks from almost everyone he's ever cared about. His most important romantic relationships are with villainous women (e.g., Talia al Ghul, Selina Kyle), and he's fought members of the Family too more than once (that is, if he didn't just hit them in a moment of anger). It is striking, to be honest, how deeply defined by violence Bruce's world is; not just because he fights criminals and villains, but because his deepest interpersonal relationships also contain violence. It's so familiar to him it's probably a comfort. King did understand this very well about the character, especially in his Knightmares story arc.

Um. I ended up on a tangent, but I think my point is that it's difficult to name a best friend for Bruce. I still feel as if labeling Alfred as a best friend is... not entirely accurate, because he's so many other things to Bruce. Alfred raised him, he's an incredibly important pillar of support, and yet he's also an employee, someone who gets his paycheck from Bruce. I would still say that Alfred is the person Bruce trusts the most, and the most supportive relationship Bruce has ever had. Alternatively, I guess one could say his best friend is Clark Kent, but Bruce has shown time and time again that he's unable to let go of the hero worship and the wariness he has of Clark's powers. And I guess you could say it's Dick Grayson, but similarly to Bruce's relationship to Alfred, there's a bigger element there of mentorship and being a father figure. Jim Gordon is definitely a friend, but their dynamic is defined by "work", by their crusade against crime...

Well. In the end, it's that fascinating pattern in Bruce's choices, I suppose. He's a very lonely individual who is terrified of loss and being vulnerable to others, but not enough that he doesn't surround himself with people who love him; he's just rarely able to cross the wall he puts between himself and them. This wall can vary from one relationship to another, but a power differential tends to be a core reason; master-butler, father-son, leader-soldier, squishy-human vs overpowered-alien, hero-villain.

[beardedmrbean]

Ah thank you, sorry I just saw the statement going around on Twitter and wanted to know if you could back that statement up

Whaaat? Sesame Street was meant to show that everyone can be equal hence why multiple celebrities from different walks of life like Ice Cube to Lucy Liu made appearances on the show and Liu herself said thank you to Sesame Street as it help her learn English?

It not like it supposed to be in New York

A very diverse place

Seriously where the Flying FUCK is Sesame Street in NYC? Must I take a magical portal to go there?

But yeah, Sesame is supposed to be like that. Then race obsessed late Gen x and millennials came along and murder fuck anything

Seriously I grew up in the 00’s, you know when a fuckton of diversity was in kids media?

Now the majority of diversity comes from people who never left their metropolitan areas.

Words can’t not describe the downgrades black cartoon characters got.

Whaaat? Sesame Street was meant to show that everyone can be equal

Here's 2 of the people that had some of the biggest impact on how I am today.

Don't think I saw Carol Spiney's face till sometime in the last 10 years or less, he was just Big Bird.

Did someone say Diversity

Down below we have the 80-81 cast, there's Mr Hooper in front of Big Bird, I don't think there's a show on today that could touch this. Could have used someone from the MENA region and India and Asia but in the mid 70's and even today this is huge.

Look it's Gordon and Susan, and their 'adopted' son Miles.

The introduction of Miles allowed the show to tackle the topic of adoption. Roscoe Orman originally suggested that Gordon and Susan have a child when he first joined the show in 1974. At the time, the producers felt that it was too complicated to cast a baby to play the part.

Ten years later, when Orman's son Miles was a year old, he revisited the idea. Orman remembers, "Caroll Spinney offhandedly said one day, 'That son of yours is so cute -- he's such a great kid -- we should bring him on the show and let him be your son.' I said that I had suggested something like that years ago but it was shot down. And he said, 'Well, you know, you could even adopt him.' That really started my wheels turning and I mentioned it to [Executive Producer] Dulcy Singer." The producers were intrigued by the adoption angle, and cast Miles Orman in the role. "The idea is that he'll grow up on the show -- for as long as he wants to," Roscoe Orman said.

They were there day 1 and through my whole childhood and beyond. Occasionally shifting performers.

Anything you could want to teach a person about being a good, kind, and accepting person you could teach them by putting on a Sesame Street + Mr Rogers Neighborhood marathon.

I'm glad Mr Rogers is free to watch on PBS kids, sometimes I need to just have that perfectly measured voice there cutting through the din of the day telling me the day was better because he got to spend it with me.

Grateful he's still around even if he isn't.

But that's not Sesame Street.

Seriously where the Flying FUCK is Sesame Street in NYC? Must I take a magical portal to go there?

It's there, it's in your neighborhood too. You just have to find some people willing to help make it appear is all.

We're surrounded by legions of good, kind, and giving people. We just need to do some of the leg work it takes to bring them together is all.