#Go to hell illuminati

[laomelettedufromage]

Sometimes I think I’m too online and then I listen to my swiftie family members talk

[amagicdoctor]

Ok so the Dr. Strange fans got some scraps in Immortal X-Men this week like yess Marvel knows he exists and is here to help ✌🏾😭✌🏾

[lizzybeeee]

Well, well, what have we here?

🎤 We want your questions! 🎤

Join us for a Reddit AMA with some of our Dragon Age: The Veilguard developers on 12/4! More info: http://x.ea.com/datv/RedditAMAInfo

[cypherscript]

Eldritch Ancient of Space idea

We all love our eldritch danny or our ancient of space danny but know what is more eldritch than the stretched limbs, unnatural toothy maw and covered in eyes? SPACE! Space is vast and we know so little.

NASA as everyone knows is nothing if not scientific but if anything everyone knows is that scientists can be supersticious as hell.

The Justice League have been notified by The Question who has been noticing a strange trend; google statiatics have shown an increase in searches regarding summoning and binding spells(Flash: "i didnt even know you could google that.") NASA has announced a new project that has flung the country's space faring travel decades ahead of the rest of the world's. "This as to be a conspiracy! Batman you must stop them the illuminati can't get into space!"

With some proper research from the Justice League and Justice League Dark they found that the question is correct and something is going on at NASA.

Imagine their surprise when they kicked down the doors to a lab at NASA, summoning circle on the floor in the corner and SOMETHING floating next to a whiteboard with scientists stood around with clipbards and pens.

It was rather large and ominous, where it floated a torus of reality was removed from their vision like looking into a blackhole, inside the torus floated a single icy crystal with a crown binding its middle that felt like it was watching you while not watching you. Tentacles of gases akin to nebulas in multitudes of colors floating around the black hole ring, unaffected by its gravity, held dry eraser markers aloft and was writing out a design of somekind.

One of the scientists asked a question to which the thing groaned a bone rumbling sound mixed with the tinkling of crysals dropping as light mainfested around it, the scientist nods and scribbles something down hastily before finally noticing the the justice league standing at their door.

"WE CAN EXPLAIN!"

Apparently the being was a fan of NASA's work, after their first few botched summoning attempts it finally worked, once it knew what they wanted they said it was happy to help them. For the past 3 months it had been giving them blueprints and formulas for deepspace travel with no binding or serious deals, just to look into some weird group making up laws.

[lizzybeeee]

THE ENTIRE DRAGON AGE AMA IS A DUMPSTER FIRE

They avoided all the high-rated questions with genuine criticism (not blind hate!) and went for questions that were safer and allowed them more leeway. After that awful IGN article and that treatment of Davrin...God, just put it down. I have no faith that BioWare will be able to continue Dragon Age or Mass Effect with the respect it deserves.

Edit - They had an opportunity for genuine discussion with fans who were concerned/unhappy with the way Veilguard was -> people unhappy with the story, the marketing, the lack of 'RP' options in an RPG, etc... Instead they just doubled-down even more, avoiding those critical questions, with no real acknowledgement that fans have very reasonable problems with this game.

Some Highlights & My Initial Ramblings Below:

The Executors

"They attempt to manipulate events in the most subtle way they can manage."

So, very clear that they're not simply observers of what is happening in Thedas: they're manipulators...

"Magical Illuminati Confirmed! Lizard People Did 9:30 Dragon!!!!"

All that complexity of character -> his hatred of Orlais, his experience as a general, his relationship with Cailain, and the influence of Howe...all diminished. Any influence from a shadow cabal is too much influence - all the humanity of Loghain's choices/consequences...God, what a waste.

Not to mention what this does to other events/characters in the series -> they imply they've been intervening as far back as the magisters breaking into the golden city. I do not find this compelling! At all!

2. Solas and the Executors

Oh my god, he sounds like such a fucking Mary-Sue I'm so sick of Solas at this point -> "Actually, I know more about the Executors than anyone alive - not even the rest of the Gods know as much as me."

("I'm also, like, an Ancient Elven God, I'm responsible for the Blight and the Veil, and I kind of locked the Gods away cause they were evil - but, like, I'm really sad about it. Also the Herald of Andraste thinks I'm cute <3")

<- Previous comments: massive oversimplification, obviously

But I miss the days when not everything was about Solas. It removes so much interest and wonder in this world when the fucking egg is behind it all. I loved him as a character in DAI and now I just feel this bone deep tiredness when I see his stupid face.

Don't you dare threaten to bring Gareth David-Lloyd back -> keep him away from this mess!

3. The Fate of the Rest of the Evanuris

Yay. I'm so looking forwards to "The Return of the Elves: Electric Boogaloo 2" - it was done so well the first time!

"It was the elves all along!"

The only character with any potential to be interesting is Andruil*, but how they handled all this lore was done so shallowly and so poorly that I find it hard to give a damn anymore. Not to mention that the game literally mentions Ghilan'nain mourning Andruil - so is this a retcon/redirection/or have you confirmed that one of the most interesting members of the Evanuris' is dead?

*interesting in that she's established in lore to potentially have a tonne of really cool things attached to her (the void armour, the great weapon she has etc...). The rest of the evanuris are nowhere near as well established as she is.

4. Southern Thedas, Sociopolitical Issues, and Future Games

NOW YOU WANT TO INCORPORATE GEO-POLITCAL EXPLORATION?? You avoided any meaningful discussion like the plague in DATV but now you're acknowledging it?? OkaY. okAy.

They couldn't even give us the long-term ramifications of the mage/templar war how the hell am I supposed to believe that they will be able to pull off 'elven gods are real' etc...? For a game series that totes : your choices matter -> they have not proven that they have been able to show that in a meaningful way. They literally cleaned the slate with this game to avoid doing that.

So, what, does that mean that the Veil is never going to come down now? Or are you going to have the entirety of Thedas build themselves up again just to have the Veil fall and send things into chaos once more?

What a fatalistic, miserable outcome for Thedas -> why the fuck would anyone bother to live in Thedas if you're going to keep throwing meteorites at them? By all means, change/conflict has to happen for the series to move forwards...but this is just so miserable at this point.

(The Elder Scrolls, at least, gives people room to breathe between crisis' or sets them up in different areas of the world! Bethesda treats past installments/your decisions with greater respect than DATV does.)

Even, then, if the Veil remains up, that means that the spirits are just trapped in the Fade being miserable for the rest of existence. The entire series has been humanizing spirits, from Justice to Cole, and now they're just throwing in the towel? I guess they can stay in the fade now! Problem solved!

What do you mean the Evanuris are not a threat anymore? IN A PREVIOUS QUESTION YOU LITERALLY SAID SOME ARE STILL POTENTIALLY KICKING AROUND THE BLACK CITY?

Weakened, sure, but Solas was 'weak' in DAI. You're giving yourself an out if you decide to go back to the elves again. Please do, I'd love more content on how the elves alone fuck everything up!

5. More Southern Thedas, the Chantry, and Tevinter

Thanks for the confirmation that things in the South are so fucked up that they have to work alongside the 'Slave Capital' of the known world to rebuild!

Slavery was one of the biggest things that caused a rift between the north/south chantry system -> one of the reasons why there were exalted marches -> a uniting belief in the south is that slavery is fucked. They didn't address slavery in DATV - what hopes are there that they will do so effectively in a future game?

Don't tell me that Dorian fixes everything off screen either -> either he solves slavery off-screen or the south is being forced to work the slaver-capitol because their land is nuked and they have no ground to stand on.

I'm so thrilled.

6. Solas and the Idol / The Blight

I will never get over Solas fucking curing the Blight off-screen and no one asking questions/giving a shit. Hello?? The Hero of Ferelden would like a word with you???

So the Blight is calcified in Minrathous, at least, but everywhere further away is still fucked! Once more, the South is doomed to suffer from the long-term effects that regular blights have -> not to mention the red lyrium (which still exists according to the AMA) across the south.

I don't care; it's lame. It's a lame way to conclude the blight and I hate it. This game did not earn 'cure the blight from thedas' at all. You could have had us learn how to soothe a titan and see how that can diminish the blight but you did it this way.

Another 'magical ritual' because Solas has such a good track record with them lmao.

7. The Agents of Fen'Harel / The War with the Qun / The Crows

Turned him against the idea of being a leader???!!

Fen'harel's Call to the Elven People After the events at the Winter Palace, elves left the Inquisition under mysterious circumstances, as did elven servants across Thedas. None could say where they went, but those who believed the Inquisitor's story about Fen'Harel wondered just how large the Dread Wolf's forces were... and what the ancient elven rebel had planned. This is from the Trespasser Epilogue, Epler!

Your concept art for Joplin literally had him as a leader of a faction of elves. Just be honest that it's a retcon and you changed course - don't try to save face with this reasoning.

About the Antaam: "We needed some big mindless bad guys to fight and so we did this because we didn't want to address the Qunari War/Invasion we set up in Trespasser".

You had to canonize Sten as being alive and Arishok in order for this reasoning to work -> you didn't even come up with an alternative Arishok to take Sten's place.

Yeah, the exchange that set up the Crows we see in the game as "idealists" did not make the game. I can confirm that!

I'm sorry, "Caterina kept Illario in check?" as in, 'kept him an idealist and not the usual Crow'? The woman that beat him with a cane and starved him and his cousin to train them as Crows. Fuck off.

lmao -> tell me you're coming up with this on the spot without telling me that you're coming up with this on the spot.

8. World State Discrepancies - Isabela

Outright ignores the very real criticism about the marketing from this game and World States.

"there are absolutely places where we unintentionally suggested there was a hard canon (...that Isabela is always assumed to have joined Hawke's party.)"

Unintentional?

Excuse me, you have her talk about Merrill and the Kirkwall Crew as family - that was not unintentional in the slightest. Not to mention Sten, Blackwall, Sera, and Cole are canonized as being part of your world state no matter what.

You had a story you wanted to tell - one that only fit a few world states - and you went ahead with it and disregarded those choices. Don't try and lie about this all being a big misunderstanding.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edit - They could have taken the opportunity to address the very reasonable criticisms that people had with this game but they cherry-picked questions and avoided/minimized anything remotely critical.

They could have provided us some insight into the game development time but each time they approached the topic they settled for "we're happy with what we delivered and it was well optimized."

They had an opportunity to acknowledge that people were bothered by the handling of the lore/stories (to potentially mention they could course-correct/ rethink their plans) but instead they doubled down on everything that they did and even 'justified' some decisions. They doubled down on the Executors, Solas's changing motivations, the destruction of Southern Thedas, and the elves/Solas being at the heart of everything etc...

This AMA basically confirmed that the only reason they did what they did to the south was for a reset -> It's not a compelling or fulfilling narrative to have everything we've done reset back to ground zero off-screen. BioWare games differentiate themselves from other RPG's by their import system from previous games - it was compelling and exciting! With DATV they set the expectation that BioWare can outright throw out entire games worth of choices/build up, not solely retcon them.

Justifying your choice to water down the lore/world of your story by saying you'll address it in the 'next game' does not instill me with confidence, BioWare! It doesn't explain that lack of it in this game either!

They avoided every question that, rightfully so, pointed out the misleading comments made by devs in the pre-order period of the game:

the fact that there were only 3 imported choices from previous games was leaked by a reviewer -> BioWare was vague from the start about choices

that this game was the most 'romantic' in the series

that world states/ headcanons wouldn't be disrespected

that there are 'lore' reasons for bad darkspawn design

that there are lasting, impactful choices/consequences to be made in this game

that the lore/world was not watered or toned down

that companions are deep and you can disagree with them etc...

BioWare's behavior towards their customers in the lead up period to this games release was downright scummy. I absolutely felt misled after playing the game for myself and recalling what I read in interviews put out. While EA is undoubtedly poison, you can't hold them solely accountable for this.

I feel for the individual developers who worked on this in what was undoubtedly a toxic environment from EA - but I feel that it's pretty clear that BioWare itself has a lot of problems within and in their leadership/executives. Working for EA does not give them an excuse to mislead their customers.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I already had a very grim outlook on the franchise from the end of DATV but this literally look my interest out the back and sent it to God. What a disaster.

[fandomnerd9602]

Scarlet and Black

Wanda Maximoff x Deadpool!Reader

Based this Request by @sweetheartlizzie07

Please a story of multiverse of madness Wanda x Deadpool male!reader? And Deadpool male!reader is a very important member of illuminati and avengers? This takes place the whole illuminati thing and when (scarlet witch) Wanda came (nobody dies), (scarlet witch) Wanda is surprised in a good way that Deadpool male!reader happens to be the father of billy and Tommy. Deadpool male gently tells (scarlet witch) Wanda to let go of his wife Wanda

There she was, the Scarlet Witch, having hijacked the body of this universe’s Wanda Maximoff in a bid to get America Chavez.

She can and would rip through all of reality of it would get her boys back into her arms.

And so that led her to right here, covered in motor oil, eyes burning fiercely, and standing in front of the Illuminati.

The one you know as Reed was trying to say tell Wanda something about his own children

“Is there mother still alive?” She asks rather coldly.

“Yes” the genius you had called friend and at certain times Jim Halpert, answered.

“Good. Then there will be someone left to raise them” Wanda responded almost robotically.

“Sheesh! Witchiepoo, you’re so dark!” You call out from the elevator as you return from a solo mission clad in your classic Deadpool red and black attire. “Are you sure you’re not from the Snyderverse!”

Wanda immediately turns her attention to you. “Who are you?”

“The question, my spicy little taquito, is who are you and why have you taken over the body of one hot MILF?”

You look to Reed. “Go home to your Emily Blunt looking wife now, Jack Ryan. This is a lover’s quarrel”

The rest of the Illuminati left. Peggy gave you a pat on the back.

“You do not know who you are messing with” the Scarlet Witch spits out, “I am the Scarlet Witch”

Despite your tenacity for bad jokes, you were gonna have this resolve without a repeat of the X-Force incident. “The Scarlet Witch? Baby I thought we agreed to never use our bedroom names in—“

She hoisted you up into the air with a burst of her scarlet red chaos magic. “You talk too much!”

“I get that a lot” you strain to say, “by the way - hot, sweaty, wearing yoga pants and covered in motor oil? Hot. Are you sure today’s not International Women’s Day?”

She bent one of your hands completely backwards.

“Ah! That was my favorite hand!”

She broke your other hand, your first hand quickly regenerated.

“Wanda, please!” You found yourself begging, and not in the fun way, “don’t do this”

“I could pop your head like a grape” she intoned.

“The look of hate in your eyes…if my life wasn’t being totally threatened right now, I’d be so turned on…oh let’s face it. Everything you do turns me on”

The Scarlet Witch began crushing your entire body with her magic. “Why won’t you die?!”

“W-Wanda please don’t do this!”

“And why not?!”

“Because Billy and Tommy will miss their Papa!” You answered as you felt so many bones within you shatter.

Immediately Wanda’s eyes shot open, she dropped you to the ground, a broken mess.

“Ow. Well not the first time you left me a boneless mess. But last time was a lot more fun” you tried to joke as your bones slowly reassembled.

“Who are you? Really?” The angry witch came storming up to you.

“I’m your husband. Well on this world. Multiverse is so confusing” Wanda didn’t hear that last part, only the word husband.

“W-What?” She took a surprised step back.

“I know that’s what I say every time I wake up next to my Wanda. How the hell she ended up with a guy like me? Some divine conspiracy…or tumblr request”

The Scarlet Witch found herself kneeling before you, coming eye to eye with you. She tenderly took a hold of your mask and lifted it off, leaving your eyes looking into hers.

“Hi” was all you could say with a little smile. “I know…I’m not Hugh Jackman.”

She saw your face only briefly in the photos hung on the walls of your home. The ones of hers and yours wedding. Billy and Tommy’s birth and following birthdays.

Her fingers began tracing over your scarred face. Every surface, almost like she was tracing it to memory and also was memory.

“You’re real?” She began to tear up a little.

“About as real as Ryan Reynolds doing a musical based on a Christmas Carol. It really happened look it up.”

You gently take Wanda’s face in your gloves hands, “look here Sabrina the Emo Witch, you now know what I look like. You can find me on your word and go the long route to your life with me and our boys. Y-You can’t grab Billy and Tommy from elsewhere.”

The Scarlet Witch took your words to heart.

“Besides, I saw Agatha all Along and Billy is currently still in Westview.” You shrug.

“What?!”

“Yeah he’s in the body of some kid named Billy Kaplan. Soul switch thing, totally ripping off the Steve Trevor thing from Wonder Woman 1984”

“I-I have to…” she tries to think of what to say. You hold her cheek tenderly.

“Go Witchiepoo, go to him” you tenderly cheer her on. “And please give me my wife back. Because I am so turned on right now and I want my cuddly witch back”

Wanda’s eyes fluttered and convulsed briefly before she turned to you, confused. “Y-Y/N? Where am I?”

“My Little Witch! Baby!!” You exclaim before kissing her repeatedly.

“Why are we at the Illuminati headquarters?”

“Let’s just say you got possessed by yourself. But like a way meaner version”

Wanda shakes her head, “m-my legs feel weak”

You pick her up tenderly, “I know baby, your friendly neighborhood Pool guy has got you. And I’m never letting you go”

You kiss her tenderly and carry her out of the headquarters.

Doctor Strange and Chavez could only look on in confusion. “Was that superhero dressed like a gimp?!” Chavez asked rather confused.

“His face looked like the topographical map of Utah!” Strange exclaimed.

Tags: @lifespectator @supercorpdanbeau @sweetheartlizzie07 @scarletquake-n7 @iiconicsfan25 @idkwhatever580 @pinklawyerwinnerzonk @ma1egamer @dudesweet17 @texaswolf23

[strawberrynightmare]

Mikey, Baji & Inupi getting whacked while they're trying to wake you up

Content warning: These take place during/after a sleepover! Tickling, something awful happens in Mikey's fic

Mikey

~Modern problems require modern solutions 🤠

~Late, late in the night, you were playing all kinds of games. Cards, truth or dare, illuminati, board games, video games, fire boy and water girl, you name it. Mikey was reaching the peak of competitiveness and you were not far behind.  

~And you would have been long knocked out had it not been for the sugar rush the two of you were on. Needless to say… the two of you were more than a bit hyperactive. 

~It was good after two am that a blood-curling crisis made its way into your blissful playtime. 

The two of you looked at each other in horror, as if to make sure you were not imagining things. But this dreadful situation went beyond human imagination. After a few minutes of deadly silence, your lover spoke in a quiet, shaky voice. 

“We ran out of snacks.”

~Even though the two of you stocked up so well beforehand, it was all gone now. After some good 15 minutes of crying about it, a rock paper scissors match began. Of course, the loser had to go through the hardships of getting their ass up, dressing up, going to the nearest 24/7 convenience store and buying some more food. 

~And he lost.

~As he dragged himself through the room, you could swear it looked like he was going to his own execution. He mumbled under his breath but the two of you were so out of it, you didn’t care and he didn’t even know what he was mumbling in the first place.

~He was back pretty soon but still found you passed out on the floor of his room. Your boyfriend didn’t think much about it when he began to gently kick your side. 

“Wake up, y/n I’ve got your favourite cookies.” ~Guy who looked and sounded like a zombie

~He knelt down to unpack the two bags of snacks while continuing to nudge you with his hand. And next thing he knew was a kick to his jaw as you shifted from laying on your back to your side. 

~He blinked a few times, instinctively touched his chin, sat there for a while, then stood up to turn off the light and fell asleep next to you. 

~Via the two of you trying to figure out how he got a bruise on his jaw after you woke up. 

Baji

~Aaand he took that personally 🙄

~It was definitely not a great idea to have a sleepover at his house on a Wednesday, but he got a bit impatient. For three whole days, you listened to him complaining about not sleeping well and insisting that the cure would be you sleeping over. 

~”What is it? I’m telling you, my mom likes you anyways. And if I sleep well, my grades will be better too!”

You’ve slept well for so many years, and the good grades were never in sight.”

”That’s foul, y/n!”

~In the end you settled for a study sleepover. Instead of messing around, the plan was to study together for some time and then go to sleep at a reasonable hour. Yeah, the plan was all it was.

~You were able to go through two pages of your textbooks before getting utterly distracted and doing whatever the hell you wanted. You ended up sneaking out even before the clock struck midnight and enjoyed the city basked in the night to your heart’s content. It was heavily past 2am when you came back and it was only because it started raining.

~Soon afterwards you fell asleep cuddling into his chest with his arm around your shoulder.

~And he recklessly followed you into the land of dreams without any awareness of what was going to happen in the morning. 

~He was woken up by his mother at the usual hour. Mrs. Baji brought you two breakfast straight into his room and as he was half awake, she urged him to wake you up as well. In a half-awake state, he barely began to complain and tell her to wake you up herself before she cut him off with “I tried”.

~In his defence, he thought that shaking your arms lightly and calling out your name would be enough to wake you up. Jokes on him, you didn’t even budge. He tried everything his mother ever used on him, taking away your blanket, rubbing your back, hell, he even tried to wake you up with a kiss - nothing worked.

~He was absentmindedly poking your cheek while trying to come up with something else. All he could think of was a glass of cold water or calling his friends. It was then that he suddenly got smacked in the face with a pillow. The force of the hit was enough to have him rolling out of the bed. His traitor pillow was dropped right next to him. All you did was roll onto your side. Still asleep. 

~If his loud ‘HAA????’ didn’t manage to wake you up, you might as well have been dead. Anyways, prepare because he took that as a declaration of war. How does a sleeping person prepare for anything

~He climbed back, pushed you onto your back and began to mercilessly tickle you in all the weak spots he was aware of. He even took a feather out of his pillow and began tickling your feet and that was the final straw, for you to wake up completely disoriented, fall from the bed and instinctively kick your boyfriend off the bed. Both of you ended up on the floor, but Baji didn’t even notice that. He was too busy patting himself on the back and praising his genius for managing to wake you up.

~All while he existed there in a half-conscious state, trying to comprehend the whole situation. 

~And then he dragged you to school. You were late because waking you up almost took him a whole hour. 

~Surprisingly, he managed to take the test and actually answer enough questions for you to consider him passing it. 

~So now he has an excuse to invite you in more often. Although he did learn to only do this on weekends so that you can sleep for as long as you wish, Sleeping y/n is the one person he’s too afraid to face again.

Inupi

~Bro gave up 💀

~It happened during a sleepover. The two of you were on the couch and watching a movie late in the night. He excused himself for a while when he noticed someone koko calling him. The call lasted longer than expected and when he came back, you were already asleep.

~All he wanted was to gently wake you up by rubbing your cheek so that you could move to his bigger and more comfortable bed. Totally not because he wanted to cuddle you. Not at all. 

~But then he got smacked with a pillow you  were clutching to your chest so hard, the force made him fall backwards and land on his ass. You were still asleep as he sat there, trying to comprehend what just happened. 

~He wasn’t even sure whether you were just pretending to sleep to take the sofa or it was really just you reacting to unwanted stimuli. 

~He sighed and simply went back to his room to gather the blankets and cushions. Then, he slipped a cushion under your head, gently fixed it into a more comfortable position and wrapped you up in a blanket. After that, he just made some adjustments for himself and sat next to you, leaning his body on yours.

~This fixed the issue the two of you always had. The issue was called ‘Who takes the bed?!’. While he insisted that you should take it, you insisted that it was his bed and you were fine with the couch. But he was also fine with the couch and he couldn’t just- sleep comfortably in his warm bed and make you sleep out there. Sharing the bed felt so intimate that none of you dared to suggest it although i know some of ya simps would jump at the first gotten chance to share a bed with him

~...So the two of you are now sharing a couch, but he swore that the next time, you’re taking the bed even if he has to drag you in there himself.

[ohisms]

↪ ᵀᴴᴱ 𝑀𝐼𝐶𝐾 , ꮲꭲ 2 . (  a  series  of  sentence  starters  from  season  1  of fox's sitcom ,  “ the mick ” adjust phrasing as necessary . )

damn , [ name ] , how many cars can one person crash ?

i can't help it — when i'm behind the wheel , i'm a slave to the power of the machine .

other people worked very hard to buy those cars , and now they're mine .

why you gotta put me in a cage ?

i'm not a rat , okay ?

shut up , you don't know what you're talking about .

i am NOT joking , i don't wanna do this .

guys , we don't snitch . that's it , end of story .

will you listen to yourself ?? "jUsT tElL tHe tRuTh"

[ name ] , you snitch you die !

pretty sure that was already there when i walked up .

how is this good news ?

everyone's gonna call me a traitor , like you .

don't worry about it , it was worth it .

what are you doing tomorrow night ?

just say the words , and it can be yours .

oh , it's like that , huh ? fine .

what was that ? i can't hear you ... you can't breathe ?

you better figure something out , 'cause if you don't — i'll have to go public with this .

that's called extortion , stupid !

those guys are just covering their own asses , they don't even like you .

as easily as i can save you in this world , i can destroy you .

if anybody messes with you , let us know - okay ?

with a dong like that , you'd think he'd be happier .

do i look like i'm playing , [ last name ] ?

oh , your breath reeks of booze .

i hope you have a plan .

i was up all night watching prep school movies in preparation .

there are some real evil illuminati-type vibes in here , right ?

there was a time i could see , and i have seen .

oh , i'm just getting warmed up .

we are but food for worms , gentlemen .

whose burrito did i just step in ?

get out of here , the tv's mine .

what did you do to my shirt ??

how would you feel if i ran around stealing your clothes ?

we had to kill him cause he wasn't a team player .

no more special treatment for you .

i grew up in squalor , i am perfectly comfortable in it .

[ name ] , don't you dare !

didn't know you were gonna be so weird about it .

if you decide that you don't want me around , just tell me and i will go .

you're not the only game in town , buddy , okay ?

you don't know who i hang out with .

jealousy is the reason people hate us .

you don't have to worry about labels , just like who you like .

i hope this is some sort of emergency .

you kept me waiting , so i'm gonna get right to it .

don't make this your thing , this is [ name's ] thing .

suing is how rich white people solve their problems .

i wanted to sing and show you there's nothing to be afraid of .

i'm so nervous for you ... i want to throw up and run away .

you could have me escorted out , but you have no security .

ooh , dark scary room ! you know what they call that in prison ? they call that a blind spot . great place to catch a shiv .

what kind of operation are you running here ?

you didn't do anything wrong . i was the problem , not you .

where i'm from , the guest gets the good seat .

i drink , smoke , lie , steal ... i'm drunk right now .

i will ruin him . please don't let me do that .

i'm not the one doing whatever you guys are doing ... what are you doing ?

i'm not judging , at least he's a hot mess .

it's the wolf's job to eat the sheep , so y'know ... this was bound to happen .

i will RUIN you when we get home .

i'll give it back to you in a minute , you're gonna get it back .

the suit you destroyed cost a grand !

come on , [ name ] . i'll help you get settled .

he can't know it was my idea .

she made her mean bed and she can sleep in those scratchy sheets .

woah , tough day at the office ?

what the hell did you just say to me ?

you are right ... no matter what you say about anything .

we do this all the time , but usually there's some art to it .

this is not nearly as fun as i thought it was gonna be .

you're letting a bunch of nerds pick on you with their computers ?

why don't you just systematically destroy her ?

i can see where this is headed , so i'm just gonna hit the road .

she ripped me open , stuffed me full of devastation and then sewed me back up again .

leave me alone , this is all your fault .

why are they yelling ? are they angry cause they're bad musicians ?

i will never understand your generation .

let me have it . how bad is it ?

do you have any idea what i saw in there ?

you should come and check out what's going on outside , cause i think you'll be pleasantly surprised .

i just want us to be friends again .

it would be such a silly waste of time for someone like me to be mad at someone as insignificant as you .

the truth is , i pity you .

when the universe gives you a sign , it's not up to you to ignore it .

[ name ] gave it to me . it means i'm in charge .

i'm not comfortable with the whole arrangement . where's [ name ] ?

this is outrageous ! i'm getting passed over again ?

i don't have a problem , i'm just blowing off some steam .

you wanna get in on this ?

you deserve to take a time out as much as anybody else .

sorry , i didn't realize you were the fun police .

having money has reaaally changed you .

i've lost control ?! oh no , you dumb , dumb idiot . YOU'VE lost control .

that's a gross overreaction .

i will show myself the door in a ... graceful and classy manner .

thanks for sticking around .

look , i realize i did some questionable things in there .

i just felt like the universe was giving me a sign .

i'm the only one worthy of its power !

keep it in your pants and follow my lead .

it's no offense , i just don't know you very well .

let's go over this one more time , just so we're clear .

we've already been over the terms .

what's in it for you ?

i like the element of surprise .

wasn't expecting that . are you okay ?

i saw a burglar , i didn't know what to do ... so i SMOKED his ass !

you SHOT me ! what the hell's the matter with you ?

that gunpowder's like a hundred years old , it probably just broke the skin .

what about the police ? they're expecting a gunshot victim .

guys , we've gotta move this along , okay ?

you got it , i'll get you a pillow .

you're lucky no one was killed .

here's the thing about the bordeaux ... i drank it .

i'm so sorry that you had to keep our mansion warm .

how do you think the police found them ?

if you're done criticizing me , i think i'll head on up to bed .

you want me to do the jobs no one else wants ?

can we pick this up tomorrow ? i was shot , so ... i'm very tired .

it has nothing to do with that . okay ? now please leave .

i wanted to thank you for having my back earlier .

that had nothing to do with you . i was just trying to hurt them .

it's chloroform . i found a recipe online .

[ name ] , don't come at me with that .

i was gonna do whatever it takes . i'm not a quitter.

i wanna tell you , i really do . but first there's something i need .

oh my god , you're bailing again .

innocent people don't sneak in and out of their own home .

'cause i don't like you , that's why .

i'd rather get mowed down in a hellfire of bullets than listen to you screech .

you don't have to lie . i heard you guys .

how was i supposed to know you were gonna hug me ? i didn't even know you knew how to hug .

[emxisms]

Can you do the Sinclair brothers, thomas, Bubba, brahms, Billy loomis, and stu matcher with a s/o that is the illuminati? They make deals with people and if they break it they kill them? So they basically are a killer too. (Make sure to take care of yourself)

Hi my love! Yes ofcourse I can! I hope you're doing well, make sure to take care too. Xoxo 💋

𝕾𝖑𝖆𝖘𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖘 𝖝 𝕴𝖑𝖑𝖚𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖆𝖙𝖎 𝕸𝖊𝖒𝖇𝖊𝖗!𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

FEM!reader.

Warnings: Harsh language, mentions of killing (duh), references to inappropriate acts

𝔅𝔬 𝔖𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔩𝔞𝔦𝔯

At first, he was definitely alarmed. You know, nobody would really trust it at first. Especially Bo. He doesn't trust anyone, really. Not even his own twin.

When he finds out you kill people aswell, he would ease into the thought of you helping 'decorate' Ambrose.

"What, so, you basically do deals with the devil and shit?" "Um, sort of.. in a way.." "Shit, and I thought you couldn't get any hotter."

He would beg you to let him help kill the sons of bitches who break their end of the deal. Then proceeds to get angry at you when you refuse.

𝔙𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔢𝔫𝔱 𝔖𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔩𝔞𝔦𝔯

Definitely shocked. Who knew someone so sweet was capable of something so harsh? You would never lay a finger on him, but to hear this news.. lord have mercy.

Is always worried about you when you go on trips. The last thing he wants is for you to get hurt when dealing with 'business.'

*Baby promise me you'll be careful, okay?* he signs, "I don't know what's careful about murder, but I promise."

𝔗𝔥𝔬𝔪𝔞𝔰 ℌ𝔢𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔱

Lord does he freak out. You're telling him your job is to make awful deals and.. if they mess up, you have to put yourself in danger?! No thank you.

When you reassure him that you're okay, and safe, he'll calm down a bit more. He just wants you safe all the time. He hates having you around his home because of how dangerous it is, but love is one hell of a drug.

Huffs and grunts at you when you get mad at him for not being careful while 'hunting' knowing damn well you do the same on your business trips. He's a sassy man at heart. But he still loves you, ofcourse.

𝔅𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞 𝔖𝔞𝔴𝔶𝔢𝔯

WHAATTT??!!!

Wants you to teach him some moves. He's open to learning a few things. If he has to kill, he wants to do it in style.

Is really excited about it at first, but the more he thinks about it, realization hits in. You could get hurt doing this. He doesn't like it anymore.

After some reassurance and cuddles later, he's calmed down and is okay with it. As long as his love is okay, he's okay.

𝔅𝔯𝔞𝔥𝔪𝔰 ℌ𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔯𝔢

Oh, no.. No, no no..

You're putting yourself in risk?! EVERY DAY?!?!... Brahms doesn't like this news. Not one bit.

He will whine and beg you to stay home and will beg to maybe even... come with you? He wants to keep you safe. You're his one and true love, he wouldn't dare lose you.

If you get hurt taking care of business, he will definitely feel like it's his fault. Why would he allow you to go out and work knowing the harm it can cause?!

𝔅𝔦𝔩𝔩𝔶 𝔏𝔬𝔬𝔪𝔦𝔰

"Well damn mama, I didn't know you had it in 'ya."

Thinks you are so incredibly hot. 10x more than he did before. He wants to see you in action, he'd definitely get a kick out of it.

If you come home from a 'mission' and you're covered in blood.. you'd best believe he's pouncing on you immediately.

𝔖𝔱𝔲 𝔐𝔞𝔠𝔥𝔢𝔯

At first, he gives you more of a confused look when you drop the info on him, and then of ofcourse he'll stick out his tongue and do that crazed giggle of his. He doesn't believe you for one second.

That is until he sees the look on your face. You are dead serious about this.

"Oh.." he stops and thinks.. "OH!!" "Oh?.."

"Ohh~.." he grins. "You're a killer too, aren't 'ya!?" He's going to be teasing you about this for weeks, maybe even months.

Asks if you're interested in helping him and Billy with some tasks. He'll be sad if you say no, but he gets it.

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

I apologize for not doing requests!! I have been incredibly busy with my personal life, and being honest.. I forgot I had tumblr installed.

I will do my best to get to your requests as soon as I can!

Requests ~ ☑️

↳ read my pinned post for further information! xx

[ckret2]

Conspiracy theories are an important part of the series' identity, what's wrong with them? Some have nasty implications if you really overthink it, but they're generally fun

I didn't say I'm not gonna include conspiracy theories in the story altogether. I said I'm not validating any REAL WORLD conspiracy theories, and I'm not talking about antisemitic & racist conspiracy theories. I'm happy to crack jokes debunking or mocking real world conspiracy theories. I'm happy to create new conspiracy theories for the fic that are totally divorced from any existing conspiracy theories.

But when I'm talking about the ones I'm not playing with, I ain't talking about "Elvis is still alive" conspiracies here. With a lot of the most oft-referenced goofy-sounding high profile conspiracy theories, they're not nasty "if you really overthink it." These theories are, in their very origins, vehicles for hatred toward minority groups. Browse for a while. Notice how many of the conspiracies that have ridiculous traits that make them seem fun on the surface are past the antisemitic point of no return.

Secret reptilian overlords disguised as humans? A deliberate effort to disguise centuries-old antisemitic conspiracies. "Jews secretly control the world," "Jews help others of their bloodline gain & maintain power," "Jews drink the blood of Christian children"—blood libel is a thing that real people believe and have believed for centuries and has historically been used to justify killing whole Jewish communities—and the exact rhetoric used in these obviously antisemitic claims was reskinned for the "reptilian overlords" conspiracy. And which real people do you think believers in the conspiracy disproportionately accuse of secretly being cold-blooded inhuman monsters trying to disguise themselves amongst normal humans? Reptilian overlords is a popular one to make jokes about because "the president's a lizard in disguise" sounds funny when stripped of context—and typically the people making jokes either don't know where it came from or don't care.

Hell, the entire "a cabal of Jewish people sorry we meant 'global elites' secretly rules the world" is one of the oldest, most versatile, and most popular of antisemetic conspiracy theories.

And check out some of the more ridiculous-sounding ones that pop culture likes making jokes about.

Hollow Earth? That one's "inside the earth is a paradise populated by Vikings (the manliest white people!) and Nazis. Yay Nazis!" A whole bunch of secret continent/secret moon colony/hidden geography conspiracies are very "yay Nazis". The Illuminati secretly control everything? For approximately a century, "Jews + Freemasons + Illuminati control the world" has been an extremely prominent conspiracy theory that's branched off into countless other conspiracy theories still believed today (it fed into the reptilian overlord conspiracy, for instance). Adrenochrome? Hollywood (and other "global elites") are trafficking children to harvest a chemical from their blood that they can inject? This is literally just blood libel again. Satanic Panic, the idea that there are real Satanic cults sacrificing children left and right, and the goofy things resulting from the panic like Chick Tracts claiming D&D will damn you? Innocent people were sent to jail for murder because they were gothy enough to be accused of Satanism. People (including the right's favorite targets: immigrants and queer people!) spent decades in jail over accusations that they were ritualistically sexually abusing children—crimes that never even happened. Even less directly harmful shit like "aliens built the pyramids" is only possible if you begin from a position of assuming it's more likely ALIENS built the pyramids than that ancient African people were capable of doing it and then ignore the fact that we do know how the damn things were built.

I don't think it's entertaining for a fictional story to go "hey, you know this conspiracy that was created to promote prejudice against minorities and has been used to hurt and kill people? Wouldn't it be sooo silly if there were a world where it's actually TRUE?? Wouldn't it be so funny if the antisemites and racists and homophobes and fascists were right about everything?"

So no. I'm not gonna use a fictional setting to validate any real world conspiracies; and I'm not gonna bring a whiff of antisemitic & racist conspiracies into a goofy comedy setting.

[unhingedmarvelandclassicwhobuff]

I'm done bottling this up. I need to go on a rant about how much Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness insulted me the one and only time I watched it.

I’m still furious that the trailers didn’t spoil that Wanda was the villain, because if they had, I would’ve sworn never to watch the movie.

I liked the first 15 minutes or so fine, and got really excited when Wanda was introduced. But I don’t think I’ll ever forget the way my heart dropped when the reveal happened two minutes later.

It shocked me so much in the worst possible way that I totally zoned out and barely registered anything else that was said in that scene, or the next one for that matter.

The Kamar-Taj massacre legitimately made me want to vomit. I truly couldn’t believe what I was seeing. This couldn’t be fucking happening. And to think it was almost even worse if that horrific BTS footage of Wanda hacking the sorcerers to pieces in melee combat made it into the movie.

This may sound odd, but the visual of Wanda ripping herself apart to get out of the Mirror Dimension truly disgusted me, because I sincerely think it was intended to dehumanize her and make her look more like a monster. Again, it was like the movie was TRYING to personally insult me.

I wasn’t paying attention to anything that was happening with Strange and America when they got to the other universe. I couldn’t focus on anything at all because I was reeling from the shock.

I hate to admit it, but when the Darkhold got destroyed for a moment I hoped against everything that that would be it. But no, immediately after that she intentionally tortured some of the surviving sorcerers to make Wong talk. Again, I genuinely could not believe what I was seeing. How was this real?

The Illuminati massacre, like the earlier battle, insulted me in ways I truly cannot articulate. I feel like everyone involved was trying to insult me specifically with how evil they were making Wanda. [A part of me has grown to morbidly like this scene, however, as the Illuminati are full-on fascists, and with how much I've grown to hate Captain Carter it was darkly cathartic seeing Wanda bisect her, but still.]

During the final battle I was sincerely expecting either those demons to drag Wanda to whatever hell dimension they came from, or for America to do that instead. If that happened then the anti-Wanda whiners would feel even more vindicated about how she was "finally being properly punished".

The way she is written out rung completely hollow, because there was no indication whatsoever that she wasn’t being corrupted anymore. It just looked like she stopped because she wanted to. And again, I feel like the movie was trying to make me upset by saying "no, this is just how Wanda is".

I want to say I felt nothing when it looked like Wanda died, but the truth is it was just the final middle finger. I guess I should be thankful for small mercies since apparently she was originally planned to go on ANOTHER killing spree ending with Strange killing her.

So yeah, TLDR, Multiverse of Madness was the absolute worst movie watching experience I’ve ever had, and cemented itself as my most hated film of all time before it even ended. I made a conscious choice to never watch it again before I even got up from my seat. It truly felt like Sam Raimi and Michael Waldron were intentionally and maliciously ruining Wanda, and the fact that it was just sheer incompetence that caused this to happen is somehow even worse, because that's how little Marvel values this character.

And just for the record, my mom, who got into the MCU because of WandaVision, was also really excited for this movie, and she has no standards whatsoever, so the fact that even SHE hated the movie's treatment of Wanda speaks volumes.

Fuck Marvel, fuck Michael Waldron, and fuck the anti-Wanda losers while we're at it.

[xjulixred45x]

Platonic Yandere Mephisto Pheles /Platonic Yandere Lucifer x Daughter! Reader: Escape

This was Requested by a very lovely Anonnymous, i hope You like it sweetie ❣️

Request: So about the Yanplatonic Lucifer/Mephisto Headcannons. Like first of all: AMAZING JOB! But second of all what if both readers actually managed to escape somehow? Maybe using inherited powers of their own?

And when they escape they join the others side (eg. Mephisto's daughter joining the illuminati/Lucifer's joining the vatican)

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: female

Warnings:(here we go) YANDERE BEHAVIOR, PLATONIC YANDERE, Escape scenario,persecution, stalking(?) kind of infantilization, MENTAL DAMAGE, ISOLATION, Manipulation, mental issues due all this, Mephisto is a psycho and Lucifer is NOT BETTER, LONG POST, I think is all.

Platonic Yandere Mephisto Pheles

He is the "easiest" to escape from.

Don't get me wrong, it's NOT EASY to escape from this demon-man, but it's definitely much more likely to escape from him than from Lucifer.

more than anything because it does give you reasons to escape.

If you remember the inside part, Mephisto is a very condescending and annoying yandere. Not only that, but in general you and him have TOO different opinions on different things.

ideology for example.

At this point in your life, having suffered so much because of your "father" and only receiving ridicule from him, you began to simply wish that everything he enjoyed would DIE...

that the humans died, that his students died, that everything that "man" could love or want was completely DESTROYED.

but you knew that more than loving something specific, he "loved" the chaos that humanity generated, that was what kept him on the side of the Vatican for so long.

You wanted to get away from him, but above all you wanted to make him SUFFER. It didn't matter anymore if you hurt someone in the process, you just wanted to see him hurt, hopeless, BROKEN like he broke you.

So, with this mentality, you made a plan to escape.

It took a lot of time to have the perfect opportunity for all the conditions for this plan to be met, but fortunately you were able to be patient and, above all, not let your father find out.

Although to be honest, you knew he would probably already have an idea, but he was curious about what you would do.

you used this to your advantage and took advantage of the first opportunity you had to run away.

NOW, what you didn't expect was that apparently Mephisto wasn't after you....it was suspicious to say the least.

So you got to work looking for the ONLY person you knew would be by your side. the person your father tried to hide from you.

Lucifer.

Most likely, he already knew the basics of who you were thanks to Shima, who give some info about your "situation".

(it is likely that you have even allied with Shima to escape and thanks to him you know about the Illuminati's)

but it was kind of surprising when you went to HIM for HELP. You went to look for him precisely because you no longer cared about what would happen to humans, you wanted to believe in the Illuminati's.

even if it was just to hurt Mephisto. But you didn't care about him anymore.

Lucifer was quite intrigued by this, since he knew that you were not a spy, and your possible powers inherited from Samael could be very useful to him.

so he took you under his wing without thinking much about it, in the same way, if you ended up being a spy, it would be better for him to keep you close.

Meanwhile, Mephisto was already worried that he couldn't feel you around for a while, so he went to look for you in the places near the school.

in nearby buildings? nothing.

further into the city? no sign of you.

even the Vatican? without a trace.

He was already getting impatient and seriously worried. What the hell were you doing? Where had you gone?

He reluctantly asked the Vatican for a favor to help him look for you, which they did but it was the same thing, there was nothing.

Mephisto began to Anxiety, and imagined the worst scenarios: maybe you are using your powers and that is why they can't find you? What happens if you end up badly because you don't know how to use them? Or if some demon attacks you?

while Mephisto is distraught and looking like crazy for you, you honestly couldn't be better.

Although Lucifer is someone neutral and very stoic, he at least understands that after being with Samael, he must be cautious with you to gain your trust. so it gives you a lot more freedom than you ever imagined with Mephisto.

Shima would go out with you anywhere you wanted, the Illuminati's gave you what you wanted, but what you appreciated most was being treated (more or less) as an EQUAL, not in a derogatory or condescending way.

Thanks to this you grew quite fond of your "uncle", whom you even saw in a "savior" light for letting you be and keeping you away from your father.

and surprisingly Lucifer started to get attached to you.

He didn't notice it immediately, but it was something quite unusual for him, as he realized that little by little you began to care more about you, your safety, your life in general was precious to him, not only because of his plan.

He found your determination to make your father suffer curious, to say the least, but appropriate, it seems that in general the children of demons are destined to hate their parents. He understands that.

and unlike Mephisto, Lucifer never underestimated you, he could see that you had little experience, yes, but you had a great determination to improve and do things well.

He subtly encouraged you to find out more about your demonic powers, and he definitely felt quite proud when you showed yourself to be quite strong. even by demon standards.

You and he could even have certain hobbies in common, like reading.

Even when he is sick, you treat him with a lot of respect, but above all you have great loyalty towards him, he can recognize it.

If Lucifer becomes a Platonic Yandere in this case, I can see him being much more subtle about his tendencies, mostly because he knows you came to him looking to RUN AWAY from that type of behavior.

He's generally surprisingly soft on you. I mean, as smooth as a demon can be. at least he manipulates you less than the normal Platonic Yandere Lucifer would.

If you are with him by the time Lucifer declares war on the True Cross, rest assured that Mephisto will be at least hurt by the situation.

For once in a long time he feels helpless, because you are within his reach again, you are fine, but he cannot go against Lucifer even in his deteriorated state, it makes him angry but above all it HURTS him to know that you have decided to run away from him and run to him. Lucifer.

Maybe he even jokes through the pain, can you see he's suffering, and honestly? you live for it.

A part of you wants to be able to rub salt in Mephisto's wound, tell him how happy you are and not be tied to him and above all, "How does it feel? Doesn't it feel good to have things out of your control and will, isn't it?" like this? THIS IS HOW YOU FEEL! YOU IDIOT!" But you didn't dare, you simply gave him the most arrogant smile he had ever seen you give him.

which somehow ends up being better.

I can definitely see a considerably depressed Mephisto after this revelation, although he knows that he has a chance to "get you back" for the first time he is not so sure.

Meanwhile, you just plan the next hit with your Uncle Lucifer :)

Platonic Yandere Lucifer

Oh boy, you were SO LUCKY for escape this psycho.

Lucifer is the complete package, Delusional, overprotective, manipulative, etc.

The primary difference it has with Mephisto is the fact that unlike the previous case, you didn't know it was wrong until recently.

Lucifer precisely raised you so that you would normalize his toxic behaviors and not have the need to flee when he saw it as something normal or even good, because he did all this because "he loves you."

but when you awakened your powers, that was when Lucifer entered his most obsessive phase, wanting to make sure nothing happened to you, he made a lot more restrictions.

He even seriously considered taking away your powers in some way, no matter how much you begged him not to, because he knew those powers could help you get away from him.

That's when you noticed the "red flags" more easily.

Lucifer firmly believes that everything he does (lying to you, isolating you, trying to take away your powers to avoid Escape scenarios, etc.) is for YOUR GOOD, he refuses to recognize that he is being selfish or a bad father.

It was a shock, it was sad, it made you feel very lost. but you knew you couldn't stay and let your father take away the little freedom you had acquired.

You generated a massive breach with your powers while your father was away, it was hasty and reckless, but you managed to run as far away as possible.

and you knew perfectly well who you could go with now. Even if you didn't know if it would help you, it's nothing.

Mephisto Pheles, or Samael.

You knew that your father wanted to recruit him for his plan to unite the Assaih and Genema, but it was very unlikely that they would unite, since Mephisto and your father had very different ideologies.

That gave you some hope.

When you arrived at True Cross Academy, simultaneously Lucifer arrived back at the Illuminati base finding the mess you left, WITHOUT YOU THERE.

Lucifer went crazy looking for you in every corner of the base hoping that you would still be there, in vain.

To say that he was worried sick and fear was an understatement.

Immediately he ordered everyone who could still walk to go after you, those who "let you escape" were killed and he himself went to look for you with trusted men.

Meanwhile you were a nervous wreck as you were anxious for your father to appear out of nowhere to drag you back to the Illuminati base.

When you arrived at the True Cross Academy, several high-class teachers and Exorcists came to interrogate you, as it was rare for such a powerful Nephelim to go to the academy.

But as soon as Mephisto appeared he decided that he would take care of the matter from now on. saving your skin.

Although it wasn't greated, he wanted to know what you were doing there or if Lucifer was nearby. When you explained the reason why you were there and he checked that you weren't lying, Mephisto seemed a little calmer.

It turns out that he did know about your existence, but precisely because of Lucifer's overprotective tendencies, he never really got to know you, although he was fine with that because of their already bad relationship.

Mephisto decided that you would stay with him just because you were family, and honestly at first it was strange.

more than anything because he never imposed anything on you like Lucifer, apart from the fact that he VERY OPENLY recognized that he was not a trustworthy subject.

You could do practically whatever you wanted as long as someone else was with you for safety.

things that you had been deprived of because of your father, for example. getting dirty, having access to the internet, wearing more clothes that were not pastel colors, eating things with high sugar, gluten or fat content, EVERYDAY things.

And most importantly, Mephisto was willing to listen to you, kind of.

He treated you like a child, yes, but in a friendly and teasing way rather than a demanding and stoic way.

You grew fond of the man very quickly, not only because he was your uncle and apparently your savior, but because you GENUINELY enjoyed his company.

Mephisto thinks your powers are very interesting, so he may even send you to train with Rin to 1-make more friends and 2-develop your abilities (and maybe be useful against your father).

apart from the fact that he laughs at you affectionately when you fail miserably at a task. Don't worry, he'll eventually give you a hand.

For safety reasons, you don't know many people, so you spend a lot of your time with Mephisto, which is funny because he spends his time making HORRIBLE jokes or puns that make you laugh.

The guy is a walking buffoon, he definitely likes to play with you in his dog form or go for a walk with you talking nonsense.

Mephisto refuses to admit in front of you that he loves you, but as soon as he is with someone else he starts showing off to you as if he were your father xd

If he becomes a platonic yandere for you, I can definitely see him as very infantilizing and very clingy, but not as isolating as he normally would be.

He knows how to play his cards well when it comes to you.

When Lucifer eventually finds out via Shima that you are with Mephisto, the man is breaking things in anger, firmly believing that Mephisto somehow manipulated you into leaving him.

and no one dares to say otherwise.

When he is going to declare war on True Cross Academy, and he sees that you are there, more than anything he feels...sad, because at that moment he really needs you, he hoped that you would be ON HIS SIDE when he did this, but no. He knows he forced your hand.

He knows what he did to you was wrong.

But will he stop trying to get you back? never.

He knows that even if he lost a battle with you, he WILL win the war and take you home with him.

Until then, it's good that you're on Mephisto's side, he doesn't judge you for still loving your father in a certain way. He is his brother after all.

Before returning, Lucifer only gives you a sad look and a "I love you" barely audible to the average human being.

but you did heard it.

Seeing your father again makes you question everything. part because of the real love you have for him as a father, part because of his manipulation for so many years to justify it.

It honestly brings out the softer side of Mephisto.

He decides that he is going to try to comfort you in a "normal" way by his standards, that is, without dog form, without jokes or tricks, just being there for you.

He definitely took a quick liking to you, but hey, that's the charm.

@trancylovecraft

Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!

Thanks for the Request Honey❤️❤️❤️

[rei-ismyname]

The Fantastic Four & Krakoa Part 1

I find it revealing, but entirely in character, that the Fantastic Four had a very *liberal* attitude towards Krakoa from the jump. To clarify, by liberal I mean *centrist* or middle class. Historically beneficiaries under most status quo and unreliable allies at best to anyone who doesn't.

BONK!

In House of X #1, the helmet bros send a strike team to steal the plans for Sol's Hammer - a Dyson Sphere around Sol designed by *a* Reed Richards Tony Stark - from Damage Control. ORCHIS built one and they need to avoid genocide. Toad, Mystique, and Sabertooth successfully copy the blueprints but Creed gets carried away killing people. Many different groups had the same idea (looting Reed and Tony's IP) but they manage to get out. The FF do a solid cop impression and try to stop them. Toad and Mystique make it to the gate, and Sabertooth does not.

Just me or were they ready to fight whoever came through the gate?

Creed is detained by Sue and then Cyclops comes to greet the four. All is friendly as befits lifelong friends and Slim shows off his fancy social skills. The four do the same, except Reed. You'd think he'd be used to it considering DOOM is always let go.

'So...' 'So.'

Nobody is surprised in the least when the true reason for his visit is revealed. Reed especially, with his crossed arms and complete silence until the 'so.' Jonathan Hickman knows how to write Reed Richards and The Avengers - if he wanted this to be Tony Stark or whoever it'd be them instead. Of course he knows what amnesty is and Krakoa is MASSIVE global news at this point, so either he's being a dick (possible) or he just doesn't care for that law and is willing to use force to subvert it. These crimes were on camera with many witnesses, there's zero reason for the FF to be handling this incident. A utilitarian might even say that providing medical care would save lives (his super science is incredibly effective.) Maybe he's irked that it's his/Tony's stuff being taken, but he doesn't mention that. Just a stated 'problem with that' then this standoff.

Keep in mind over 150 countries have recognised Krakoa at this point, including the USA, China, India, The UK, Canada. Recognition gets you a trade agreement for Krakoan miracle medicine and two other things.

1. Any mutant can claim Krakoan citizenship by birth.

2. An unstated but limited amnesty period for any and all crimes, the idea being that human bias against mutants makes justice impossible. All mutants from treaty countries are made available for extradition so the nation of Krakoa can judge them.

Is it ballsy as hell? Absolutely, but it's law. Seems very hypocritical to pick and choose, especially when you're enforcing it yourself. Do Reed and co know better than the US government or the United Nations? Eh, probably not. *Cough* ILLUMINATI *cough.* They could be the living tribunal and it wouldn't make this any less hypocritical. They're placing themselves above it here and I can't see why they'd go that far.

Cyclops puts his hands up and backs off, still very politely. That's that settled. Without acknowledging that or missing a beat Sue says her piece. 'What are all of you thinking?' 'Of course not, but...' I really wish Sue didn't get cut off there. I'd have to do a lot less speculating.

What a find!

My read on the subtext is that this engagement started off tense AF, and the FF were not interested in being diplomatic. Johnny and Ben barely speak, Cyclops' politeness and personal, first name greetings compared to 'Slim' and then 'Cyclops.' One would expect the mood to lighten somewhat after he concedes that they're a country unto themselves, but it doesn't. I get the impression Sue's not really listening to Scott, and after the 'but...' he stops trying to meet them halfway. It's impossible to say if he still would have said that about Franklin (AKA the last thing these NIMBYs want to hear) but it wouldn't surprise if it's a subtle 'hey idiots, you're invested in this too. Hope you don't treat your son like this.' (They do.)

Next time we'll find out if they've budged when it comes to their mutant son. (Spoilers, they invade Krakoa.)

It is a recent-ish development, and humans/people are great at kneejerk reactionary initial responses, so maybe I'm being unfair. Honestly, I don't think so. The FF have rarely lifted a finger for mutants and it's obvious this is a subject they've discussed and reached a consensus on. Besides, if you're appointing yourself AmbassadorCop you need to be prepared to deal with situations like this. Krakoa is a country not a treehouse. Regardless of what anyone thinks of Krakoa, by the internal rules of 616 they're as legit as any other country, legally.

Also, Reed should not be surprised by this. Chuck bought up Krakoa at an Illuminati meeting years ago. We don't see the rest of the discussion but I'm pretty sure he knew before Magneto did, for example.

[wezzyaug]

(SPOILERS!!!!) this has probably been said multiple times by multiple people in the blue exorcist fandom but we need to chill with the yukio hate PLEASE i beg, i know he can be jerkwad sometimes but there are a lot of those and only yukio gets hated for it im i love yukio a lot hes just a goober :( and also a lot of people haven't seen the manga and don't understand there is so much more to his character!!!! i know people have their own opinions and all that but most people will jump him cus hes rude to rin from what i've seen but gang rin aint perfect either and yukio is 15, a teacher, an exorcist, son of satan, and HAS to deal with his brother (with unleashed demon shit going on) while dealing with the grief of their dead adoptive dad and dont get me started on the whole arc with his satan eye and the illuminati and shit, hes gotta deal with alot and hell ive seen some people who HAVE read the manga say absolutely AWFUL things towards him, hes a kid, i understand actions aren't 100% excusable especially some of the stuff hes done but please tone it down??? i could go on and on for this but, its ok to have an opinion but like bro maybe hear out on the other side cus most yukio haters i see are the most stubborn ass people EVER

[vidavalor]

have u ever seen the "his name has Ra in it. Ra is the Egyptian god of sun. Sun has three letters. A triangle has three peaks. Illuminati is a triangle. That means that he's illuminati" videos?

cuz ur like that but cooler and more educative

The last line of your message means you can have chocolate pie. 💕*sets you up with a plate* I was getting a little nervous there for a second lol. I think that any book or show that causes its audience to engage so much is a great one and if someone is enjoying making connections like the ones you described, then it's their life to enjoy. I'm not going to yuck on anyone's yum but I have seen some theories that I honestly had difficulty following so I get whatcha sayin' and I appreciate the compliment.

If I said this next sentence with any other context but with regards to Good Omens, you'd all try to have me committed lol but here it is: I'm following language-related directions from The Voice of God. Literally. I have it in the works to do a post on that alone because the show is actually teaching the audience Crowley & Aziraphale's vocabulary and it's provided some keys at times as to where in the show you can find lessons in it. In S2, there's also a meta scene about it, which is the "Professor Rossignol" scene. Some brief thoughts on that and, since you were nice enough to drop me a note, also on Ra and The Illuminati while we're at it, just for kicks.

It's no good to make it evident to your audience that your main characters are speaking a secret language that they've made up if the audience can't be taught to speak it because then the meaning of what's being said is lost, right? And it is very obvious that Crowley & Aziraphale have their own vocabulary. There are a lot of examples of it but one scene, in particular, that stands out to me is 1967 because it is literally impossible to make heads or tails of what they're fully discussing unless you try to figure out what Aziraphale means by "dangerous." He tells Crowley that he's heard about Crowley's plan to rob a church for holy water and then says to him this, word-for-word:

"I can't have you risking your life. Not even for something dangerous."

What does that mean, right? If you didn't already get a sense that their words don't add up on the surface sometimes, you get smacked in the face with it in that scene. Aziraphale's phrasing puts "dangerous"-- a word with a scary, negative connotation-- in the position of a positive, cherished thing that Crowley would see worth risking his life for and the end result is that "dangerous" must mean something to them besides the surface definition of the word. [What it does is something someone else has asked me for so post on that to come.] Right there, though? You have hidden vocabulary. One of the most important scenes in the show and it makes no sense without an awareness of it. This is all long before Crowley's standing there saying "no nightingales" in 2.06.

There are other scenes where something doesn't add up without an awareness of hidden language being spoken. Why does Crowley melt into a puddle of burning goo at Aziraphale saying "We will win, you know" about Heaven winning Armageddon in 1.01? Because, as other scenes and The Voice of God's narration teach, when they're speaking of Heaven or Hell with pluralized pronouns, they're really talking about the two of them together beneath the surface. That's why Crowley's face melts into a lovesick gaze and hint of a smile when Aziraphale says "we will win"-- because Aziraphale is saying that he and Crowley will win.

In S2, Aziraphale says he learned French "the hard way" with "Professor Rossignol" in 1760. Aziraphale already speaks French. He and Crowley, as Crowley points out in the scene, speak every language of the world. It's a nod towards how you can speak a language but a secret language like theirs is one that can be built out of words that sound familiar but are put together in a way that you need to understand in order to comprehend what is being said.

In the course of the scene, Aziraphale speaks French to Crowley and what he says is a riff on "la plume de ma tante"-- a French phrase that refers to the kinds of sentences that you are taught when you learn a new language that you would never actually say in real life. This scene is actually nodding to the "la plume de ma tante"s of Ineffable Husbands Speak and where you can find them in the series.

The reason why those sentences exist the way they do when you are learning a new language is to teach as much vocabulary as possible alongside teaching people how to conjugate verbs, etc.. This is why you are never taught practical sentences like "Excuse me, where is the restroom?" or "Yes, I would like to buy that bread, please." but are, instead, taught sentences like "Is it true that you can buy white onions at the library on Tuesdays?" lol. It's because when you are a child and you learn the native language or languages spoken by the people around you, you absorb thousands of words just by living in that world but when you are a teenager or an adult learning a new language, you start almost from scratch. You need to learn as much vocabulary as possible as soon as possible, in order to become fluent. Aziraphale says he learned some "la plume de ma tante"-like sentences (in a language he already speaks but in which he wanted to play better) from a professor whose name eagle-eyed fans already translated as meaning "nightingale" in French, right?

Nightingales (the birds) and also nightingales (the skeleton keys). The Rossignol family created The Great Cipher that encrypted communications for the French government for centuries-- they literally built a secret language. If you want to learn Ineffable Husbands Speak, the show is saying, you need to follow the nightingales. So, who taught us about "nightingale" being a word related to Crowley & Aziraphale? God. Whose sentences, at times, smack of "la plume de ma tante"-like vocabulary lessons? God. What better character to teach us what we need to know than the literal Voice of God, right? God is our Professor Rossignol.

God's 1.01 line of "The Russian cultural attache's black bread is particularly sought after by the more discerning duck" is the most la plume de ma tante sentence in Good Omens lol and the four sentences-- of which that is one-- that God says to re-introduce us to Crowley & Aziraphale in the St. James' Park scene, when picked apart using language elements things suggested by God's opening monologue at the start of the series, contain almost every element of the vocabulary, with other scenes reinforcing and adding to it throughout.

Further suggesting this is the way to go is that if you apply the same instructions to the top part of Demon's Guide to Angelic Beings Who Walk the Earth (the bit above Aziraphale's entry), you'll find the guidelines repeated-- and notes to us that include everything you would need to unlock the hidden language in the entries for Aziraphale and Baraqiel (Crowley) beneath them. I'm not just randomly deciding this is what stuff means, is mah point lol. I'm taking lessons from Frances McDormand.

As for Ra and The Illuminati, well... to date, I've seen Ra come up as one of the many, many words in Demon's Guide to Angelic Beings, which are hidden-in-plain-sight coded love letters. Aziraphale uses it in relation to Crowley. Ra is the ancient Egyptian god of the sun and was depicted as a figure that was half-bird, half-man. That alone would probably be amusing to Crowley & Aziraphale. Aziraphale referring to Crowley as the god of the sun is just romantic. The sun is a star and Crowley made them; the Earth and all life and their life on it would die without the vital warmth of the sun. There is no food and no peace and no life without it. Calling his very old serpent partner the god of the sun sure sounds like Aziraphale saying that he can't live without him.

As for the masons and Gabriel... I took it as a joke about conspiracy, actually, not something suggesting one. The bartender at the pub assumes that Gabriel and Beez are masons-- meaning Freemasons-- because he thinks that there is a local chapter that meets nearby. The bartender has made assumptions about Gabriel and Beez that add up to "not from around here" and assumes they're there for a mason meeting. Gabriel is well-dressed and clueless in a rich sort of way to the bartender-- he doesn't know what a jukebox is and he's in an expensive-looking suit. He also has an American accent so the bartender figures he's probably not a local. Gabriel doesn't dissuade the bartender from thinking that he and Beez are Freemasons because Gabriel has no idea what that is-- because the bartender said "masons" and, honestly, that actually is pretty close to what Gabriel is by his own definition.

A mason works to make things out of stone and the original meaning of the word was specifically related to those making stone walls. Gabriel was in Eden at the start-- the ultimate in stone walls built-- and he also just took Beez to see a statue of himself carved out of stone. Walls are really all Gabriel's ever overseen being built or ever reinforced or ever known before Beez. He's not the most poetic of beings but he can see an analogy there where he is the imprisoned imprisoner of those in Heaven and he just doesn't dispute it because not like he's about to tell the bartender that he's actually The Supreme Archangel of Heaven and Commander of the Heavenly Host 😄 so, letting the guy assume that he works in stone seems like a good solution, as it's actually barely a lie.

The irony is that, etymologically-speaking, the bartender is actually more correct: Gabriel, in the pub that night with Beez, isn't a mason. He's a free mason. Because he's with Beez and the two of them together are carving a path out of their prison walls. Gabriel has actually joined "The Illuminati"-- because he's been illuminated... he's been enlightened. Dude's going to be Grand Master Wizard of The Illuminati or whatever it's called in S3 and bring a whole lot more with him, Beez, Crowley & Aziraphale along the way. He consumes beverages now. There's nothing holding him back. 😂

Anyway, thanks for indulging my ramblings and have a great night. 💕

[midnight-in-town]

Finally ! Some good Shura content !! <3

For the past few months, I've been complaining to some friends in private about being disappointed to see Shura rather casted to the side of the narrative, when the twins are still not able to communicate properly with each other (last month's chapter had more than one example). :/

In general, I'm a big fan of Shura's character, because she's one of the very few female mentors existing in Shonen series (protagonists, especially boys, are trained by older men in almost every Shonen series) and that was refreshing when I started the series something like 12 years ago. Shura gained even more depth with the Aomori arc explaining her past and rather unique circumstances and I loved her character development.

So I'm really happy to see her getting a bit more focus again, against the current foes.

If we first focus on the twins for this chapter, it really was interesting to see how they fell back into their old habit of respectively privileging people (Rin) and the mission (Yukio). It's yet another thing that might intensify the miscommunication that still exists between them, especially since both are really close to Shura.

For the record though, I don't blame Yukio at all for not stopping to help : the plan to defeat Satan & Illuminati is insane and that's why they have Team A opening the path for them.

Besides, Yukio has known Shura longer than Rin and he knows better than anyone what she's capable of. So rather than giving up on her, he's trusting her to survive (and I hope Rin will figure that out too). It's like in ch133, when he agreed to let her take the lead.

Lastly about her opponent, I'm 100% excited to finally read about Shura fighting against an opponent who is probably supposed to incarnate, like, every criticism she ever faced.

Like I said above, Shura is one of the few female mentors existing in Shonen series. However, unfortunately, she's also the typical "sexy older lady" that is way overrepresented in Shonen series. But now?

Hell, now, she's about to face this guy, the King of Lust, and I'm hoping that, through this fight, Kato-sensei might once more highlight that women in Shonen are more than boobs here to please the readers' eye.

Sure, they can be sexy, but they can also be mentors, fighters and most importantly they can also fight and defeat guys (because I'm super tired of the whole "girls will only fight girl opponents, teehee ❤" in Shonen series; I said what I said).

Can't wait for that fight, because I think Shura will prove to readers of Shonen series that you can be a badass girl and hand even the King of Lust his own ass. So go for it, Shura ! Show 'em what it's like to be Fujimoto Shiro's student and Rin's mentor !!