#Gil’s like yeah I guess he’s kinda a cool kid

[royaltea000]

Alfred gonna be explaining to the Pentagon why it is absolutely in the US's national interest to send in Delta force to kidnap politely pick up Gil so he and him can get married

Alfred fucking storming outta his boss’s office pouting and sulking like you guys hate me. and want me to be alone FOREVER!!! >:T hmph! What is the point of being a global superpower if he can’t even have his centuries long childhood crush and adult obsession be his smh

[jai-lovely]

Withered Evelynn

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Warnings: Mentions of cigarette/ smoke, explosives, Merle, please tell me if I missed any

Father figure Daryl dixon x oc

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As she taps her fingers nervously against her thighs, Evelynn watches her brother rub his chin in frustration. "Gil?" her voice comes out quieter than she expected, but none of the less he turned his head to look at her.

"Hm?" He only looks at her for a second before quickly looking away back to the road, which is full of cars, of everyone that that's trying to leave the hectic city "what bout mama? Do ya think she got out?" Looking over to him only to see his face immediately fall, turning to a bitter look.

Gillian clenches the steering wheel before opening his mouth to speak only to cut himself off, "how bout you go play with those kids up there for a bit yeah? Let me think for a bit" he says his voice filled with stress. Evelynn looks at her older brother, before looking out the window to see the kids he was talking about.

With a sigh she opens the truck door and hops out making sure to grab her backpack. Closing the truck door she looks at her brother one more time, seeing him nod, and shrugging her backpack on before turning and walking over to the kids, with her bright Pink backpack shining from all the headlights.

There was two kids playing chess in the back of a vehicle, one was a girl, she looked a bit older than Evelynn, but that didn't matter to the younger girl, as long as she was nice. The older looking girl had short blonde hair to her ears, and was holding a fabric doll in her lap, she seemed to be a little nervous, can't blame her though. Across from her was a boy, he seemed to be the same age as Evelynn, just shorter. He had brown hair that was kinda overgrown onto his ears, and a bunch of freckles, he doesn't seem nervous though, more bored, can't blame him for that either.

Before Evelynn could realize she was staring, a woman with a buzz cut saw her and smiled, waving her over. The younger girls face flushed a light pink, realizing she had been caught , but put her head down a bit as she walked over.

The lady with a buzz cut was nice, Evelynn learned that her name was Carol, and the girl with the short blonde hair was her daughter, Sophia. While the younger boys name was Carl, and his mama is well, never asked about that so don't really know.

Carl was really talkative, known him for like five minutes and he already knows both of her favourite colours and her birthday. Sophia was quiet, it's nice actually, she just holds her doll in her arms, "do you like frogs?" The boy named Carl asked her, Evelynn screwed up her face a bit, 'what an odd question' she thought, "uhm, I guess but their real slimy, I don't like to touch'em" he frowns a bit at that but nods before letting out a quiet 'cool'.

Evelynn opens her mouth to ask if he likes frogs, but her voice suddenly gets cut off by really loud noises over head. Looking up to the sky Evelynn sees a bunch of planes flying just above the tress, heading towards the city. ' The city, ain't that where all the sick people are?' She asks herself, loud bangs bring her out of her thoughts. Evelynns eyes widen as the ground shakes a bit from the explosions "their bombing the city" a women with long brown hair says, as she jogs to where we are, a buff guy following right behind her.

The woman walks over to Carl bringing him into her arms, guessing that's his mama. The brown haired woman looks over to me, her eyes squinting in confusion.

Carol notices her expression "this is Evelynn" she gestures her hand to the young girl, "Evelynn this is Lori, Carls mom" with a quick nod towards the young girl, Lori turns to look at the man behind her, only for him to walk off, strange.

Evelynn feels someone's hand on her shoulder, and quickly whips her head around to see who was touching her. It turned out to be Gillian, his hand on her shoulder loosened a bit but still a firm grip.

"Yall the group that's going up to the quarry?" Gillian suddenly speaks, loud enough from just the group of people to hear. Lori looks at him, her brows furrowing, "how do ya know about that" she says sitting beside her son. Gillian looks back at his truck before looking at Lori, "your buddy, Shane? I think that's his name, but I guess he saw I was with Eve, and invited us" he shrugs.

Lori nods "there's a few others that are gonna be going, just follow the Rv, we're gonna be leaving in a minute". Gillian nods "Roger that", and before Evelynn could process what was happening, her and Gillian were walking back to the truck. On their way back, they pass another truck, with two guys with matching vests, 'kinda reminds me of friendship bracelets' she thought. Evelyn began to cough a little while walking past them, all cigarette smoke clouding around them. While she covers her nose with the collar of her shirt, she sees the older looking man chuckle, before putting the cancer stick back in between his lips.

The truck doors slam, as the pair gets into the vehicle. Evelynn takes off her backpack putting it on the floor of the truck, and before the young girl realized the truck was started, and the duo were trailing behind the big crème color Rv.

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Tell me if u would like to be added to a tag list!

AHHHHH first chapter!!! I hope you guys liked it, I've been procrastinating making a twd story lol

Feel free to give me feedback in the comments

Thank you for reading Withered Evelynn

[derekmorganscrocs]

Nancy Drew 2x17??

Who knows what episode we’re on anymore? Not me, that’s who.

Thoughts While Watching

SUPER SPOILERS ALRIGHT? DONT READ IF YOU HAVENT WATCHED

BESTIE BETTER BE DREAMING??

omg Carson is so sweet 😭 stop being a good father you’ll make me cry!

This reporter lady is definitely growing on me. Black Crown Tape?? Sounds freaky... I guess that’s the point.

So you’re telling me that Everett can’t trust his personnel but trusts Nancy? Psycho.

AMANDA! I missed her <3

Reporter lady is very growing on me. I forgot her name but I remember now, it’s Val. Yes Amanda take Ryan’s big bills, no need to break em! make some money. I’m calling it, the body is blocking the door. THE BODY WAS BLOCKING THE DOOR! Detective Crocs, at your service.

Celia looks high as balls right now. Just saying.

BESSS STOP ASKING THIS POOR WOMAN ABOUT YOUR DATING PROFILE PLEASE?

This package thingy is freakin me out a little. I thought there was gonna be a finger in it or something.

Of course it would be Amanda and Gil’s dad. Who else would it be?

Okay, putting phone down now to watch.

NANCY TRICKED BESS? AW STOP- I wanna say bestfriends but I feel like this is a “historians would call them besties” situation but IDK. I’m concerned though because my fanson heart could not handle georgess

I kinda like Celia though 😫 she’s so salty at the florist and it’s funny!!! Too bad she’s gonna die. Yeah I saw a spoiler on Twitter. Damn you Twitter.

THEY JUST HAVE A MOSELEUM?? (Idk how to spell that) WTF HUDSONS?

MOMENT OF TRUTH WE NEED TO SEE TOM’S DRESS. HOLY FUCK ITS SO COOL! OBSESSED OMFG I LOVEEEE. (not sure on the hair, BUT I LOVE THE DRESS)

I DID IT AGAIN I PREDICTED THE CAMERA TOO? WHAT THE FUCK?? (See “pictures” Ace x reader on my page).

Nick is just in the backseat like a little kid. Yes I’m laughing right now.

THAT IS SO OBVIOUSLY A TRAP?? And I still would like to know why they just ~have~ this mass grave?

IS IT A BOMB OR A CAMERA? A camera!!!

Momma’s mad. (Rightfully so, but hehe I’m funny! Nancy definitely has disappointed mom energy.)

CELIA IS TRIPPING BALLS GUYS I GOT SPOILED AND I KNOW WHATS GONNA HAPPEN BUT SHES BEEN DRUGGED RIGHT? OH FUCKITY FUCK FUCK WHAT THE HELL? SHE GOT LIKE HUMAN PUPPETED, IS NANCY WITH HER GHOST RIGHT NOW?

STOP IT- Celia was really growing on me, NO STOP. Nancy begging her not to go and her telling nancy it’s okay? Stop.

OMG NO I WAS ROOTING FOR THEM! NOT RYAN AND VAL STOP. OMG HES GONNA GO GET HER. THEYRE IN CARE FOR?? not love but care for.

WTF. WTF IS WITH THAT PICTURE?

BAD BITCH ENERGY MISS NANCY, TAZE THAT GRANDPA. OOH GET IT BONNIE AND CLYDE GIL AND NANCY!!!

To summarize:

Apparently that was Celia’s ghost the whole time? I’m kind of sad she’s gone.

Ryan and Val, alright okay, I see you. Ryan seems to have an unintentional star-crossed lovers problem. First Lucy, now Val. I see patterns. (Idk that I should call it star crossed, but definitely something like that.)

Nancy is most likely going to be injured or taken hostage at some point because of that photo. She also seems to be going a little bit crazy. I mean, rightfully so.

Nick is adorable as always and I liked him and Ryan working as a team. And with Val too, that was cool.

I’m glad to see bess getting back into dating. Y’all think Lisbeth might come back? And I liked that George helped to say some good things about bess for her dating profile.

George seems to be struggling and I hope someone actually gets her to talk to them about it. I feel like that’s an opportunity for an Ace/George bonding moment, because George’s aunt was the first time we’ve ever really seen them kind of be serious and feel with one another and I’d love to see that again. Though I’d also love a George breaking down and Nancy is the only one there scene so they can bond too.

And I’m so glad ace brought his hat back <3 i really missed that look.

[eirabach]

Starcrossed [1/1]

My contribution to @pen-and-ink-week-2020 day one, prompts: camping / steady.

Gordon’s got mud in his hair and splinters in his knees and a blood blister on his palm from a mallet he had absolutely no idea how to use and Virgil -- Virgil needs to wipe that look off his face right this damn second.

“I cannot believe I let you talk me into this.”

Virgil, the bastard, is grinning from ear to ear. “Hey, you asked for my advice and my advice was to do something different and memorable. Not go bury your excrement in the woods memorable. That’s on you, kid.”

Gordon drops back onto the crinkly nylon nest he’s fashioned from their sleeping bags, and presses the heels of his palms into his eyes.

“Oh this is a disaster. This is such a disaster. I need evac. A new name. Safe house. The works.”

Virgil sighs, and taps his tiny holographic foot against the painfully out of place pink leather overnight bag that’s jammed up against the tentpole.

“You’re being over dramatic. She hasn’t actually left.” He pauses, craning his head as though he can’t already see the entirety of the two man tent from the comm’s spot at Gordon’s feet. “Has she?”

“I have sent,” Gordon hisses between clenched teeth, “a member of the aristocracy to fetch firewood.”

“Sounds fair to me, she wants to eat right?” Virgil’s grin is so big it must physically pain him. Gordon hopes so. “Vive la revolution!”

“Vir--gil.”

“Gor-don.”

Beyond the gentle rustling of the wind through the redwoods and the sound of his own internal mental breakdown, comes a high pitched and familiar yelp. Gordon scrambles upright as best he can, clutching the comm to his chest with unsteady hands.

“Oh god, she’s coming back.”

“Yeah, that was the plan right? Gordon --” Virgil’s not grinning quite as big anymore and his voice turns gentle. “It’s gonna be okay. It’s Penelope. And you. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Gordon grimaces, peeling back the tent’s zipper far enough to see her, her hair tucked up under a worn IR branded bobble hat, her back to him as she drops an armful of kindling into the centre of the clearing. “Yeah, I mean, she could realise. And run. Yeah, that’s pretty much what I’m worried about.”

Virgil rolls his eyes. “Gordon --”

“Gordon!”

Virgil squarks unhappily as Gordon tosses the comm over his shoulder.

“Hey! Hi, yes. Hello.”

The tip of Penelope’s nose is pink from the autumn chill, and when she smiles it scrunches up tight as the band that seems to have appeared around his chest..

“You sound surprised to see me.” She moves to peer around him and into the tent proper. ”What are you up to in there?”

“Nothing?”

“Really?” She steps back, gesturing to the woodpile. “Well, since you’re a gentleman of leisure, does this meet with your approval?”

Gordon winces, and begins struggling to extradite himself from the really very much too small tent. Yet another plan that had seemed like such a good idea at the time.

“I didn’t mean like, nothing nothing.”

“Oh of course.” Penelope nods sagely. “The other sort of nothing.”

“Yeah exactl -- Bertie!” A tiny flash of cream and black comes barrelling into him as he tries to untangle the zip, sending Gordon flying back into the tent in a cacophony of tearing fabric. He scrambles back up and stares at the tent door, which is now hanging morosely in raggedy strips. “This is -- kinda a disaster isn’t it?”

Penelope pops her hands on her hips, and smiles down at him fondly. 

“Oh I don’t know, I can’t see any Thunderbirds swooping down to save the day.”

Gordon groans. “Don’t tempt me.”

“Oh come along, darling. Fresh air, nature, what’s not to love?” She steps forward, and drops to her knees in the leaf mulch before him. “You’re not getting spoiled by your tropical island lifestyle are you?”

“Uh, this was my idea?”

“So I recall. Sold to me on the promise of ‘smores and cuddling and really darling --” she taps her watch. “I seem to be suffering from a distinct lack of either.”

Gordon slaps at the remains of the tent doorway and clambers out, pulling Penelope to her feet as he does so. Behind them Bertie is busy tugging a tartan blanket free, his tail wagging frantically as he wraps himself up in it.

“Sorry,” he says, wrapping his arms around her waist and swaying slightly as she leans back to place her own arms around his neck. “That’s very remiss of me.”

“Very,” she says, and goes to rest her cheek on his shoulder. “Is there something wrong, Gordon?”

The leaves crunch under their feet and Gordon buries his nose in the soft wool of the ugly hat. It smells like her perfume and ozone and island heat and he’d wondered where she’d gone and got it from and huh, now he knows.

“You stole my hat.”

“I borrowed it.”

“That’s a crime, Penelope.”

“Are you trying to change the subject?”

“Are you trying to get away with stealing my hat?”

Penelope draws back, soft smile replaced by a line between her brows that makes Gordon’s chest hurt. “You can have it back, you know.”

“No -- god no. You look way better in it than I ever did anyway,” he smiles a little brighter for her, and kisses the line until it melts away. “Sorry if I’m being weird. I kinda -- I don’t know. Nervous, I guess.”

And then she’s smiling again, and the world rights itself slightly. “I am threateningly attractive in this hat.”

“Oh, very.”

“And you do have to prove your manliness to me.”

“Oh?” The world tilts again, but for very different reasons as Penny pushes her body against his. “I think I can probably --”

And then she’s gone, practically prancing across the clearing to the pile of wood. She holds two pieces up, her lip between her teeth, and wriggles her eyebrows at him.

“You promised me ‘smores.”

---

He proves his manly worth eventually, and the campfire he coaxed and wheedled into existence burns bright as the full moon rises overhead. 

He’d brought camp chairs, but they sit abandoned where he’d dumped them, and the two of them lie side by side on the blanket Bertie had liberated, cooling cups of tea at their sides, their breathing steady and rhythmic under a spinning, starbright sky.

“It rather puts everything into perspective, don’t you think?”

“Hmm?”

Penelope waves a hand up at the sky. “All -- all of everything. Sometimes it all can feel a little overwhelming, and then I think -- well.” She drops her hand, wriggles a little closer into his side. “I think that sometimes it’s all too easy to forget that this whole planet of ours -- every one on it -- we are so terribly tiny aren’t we?”

“Jesus, Pen.” He pinches her side slightly, squeezing his arm underneath her as she jumps and pulling her as tight against him as he can manage. “I get enough short jokes at home.”

“Oh ha ha, I don’t mean that in a bad way --”

“That I’m short?”

She smacks at his belly, and her laugh rings through the trees and out into the universe. “Gordon!”

“Sorry, sorry.”

Penny shakes her head slightly. She’s lost the hat at some point during the evening, and her hair catches on the rough blanket, tickles his nose. “I just -- sometimes I need reminding that I’m allowed this, that’s all. That we have a place.”

“Tell me about it.” It’s hardly more than a breath, hardly out loud at all, but Penny’s hand settles on his where it lies at her waist and her fingers twist tight between his own.

The moonlight forms a silvery halo around her upturned face, her soft breaths forming little puffs of cloud that float and fizzle away in the chill night air, and it’s just the two of them, the rest of the world banished from the circle of the campfire’s light. It’s -- it’s a moment.

Gordon’s other hand settles in the pocket of his jacket, and he grips the velveteen box tightly as he tries to steady his nerves. Imagines Virgil, the way he’d rolled his eyes and said, what’s the worst that could happen?

And Gordon looks at Penelope and Penelope looks at the stars and he thinks forever.

I could lose this forever.

And he thinks -- he thinks -- he can’t.

He uncurls his fingers from the box, slips his hand free to thumb at a chocolatey smear on her cheek. Penelope turns her face into the palm of his hand and sighs.

“Thank you,” she says. “I needed this.” 

Gordon goes to scoff, but then she’s dipping her head to drop a kiss to his wrist and his heartbeat skitters and skips under her lips.

“Take me to bed?”

She doesn’t have to ask twice.

---

Morning has brought a bright autumnal dawn, perfect yellow light pouring through the poorly pinned doorway to settle on the dew damp curls at Penelope’s temples, freckles burnished gold against her cheeks.

He’s seen a lot of beautiful things in his life. Beautiful places. Corals, neon pink and orange in a turquoise sea, otherworldly sunsets, cave systems that glow lilac with phosphorescence, the way a mother’s face twists when he places their lost baby back in their arms.

He doesn’t think he’s ever seen anything as beautiful as this.

Penny’s all twisted up in the sleeping bags, the zips long abandoned, her hair wild with static, her arm thrown over her head. There’s a pug snoring between her knees, her elbow’s half an inch from his nose, her lips are chapped from the chill air, and he loves her. God, but he loves her.

And Gordon -- Gordon can’t help it. He leans over, kisses the tip of her cold nose and whispers;

“Marry me.”

Blue eyes snap open shrewd and bright, so bright, that the part of Gordon that’s not currently freaking the fuck out wonders, briefly, if her perfect peaceful sleep was just a bit too perfect. “Pardon?”

Oh, oh this is not the way this is meant to happen. No. No way. He wriggles away from her as best he can, backs himself right up until the tent is sticking to his back and Penny -- Penny is staring at him as though he’s actually lost the plot.

He’s totally lost the plot.

She’s worrying her lip between her teeth, that furrow back between her brows and oh god he’s fucking this up isn’t he. He knew he would. He knew it. “Gordon, did you --”

“No! No, not -- not no -- just hang on -- hang on I was meant to do this -- stand up.” He gestures, a tad wildly, and Penelope blinks at him. Maybe she had actually been sleeping after all. Maybe he can convince her this is some sort of terrible nightmare.

“I -- excuse me?”

He takes an unsteady breath, attempts to gather whatever wits he possesses, and scuffles around for his discarded jacket. His fingers finally close around the box, and he squeezes his eyes shut. At least he’s already on his knees. “You gotta -- you gotta stand up.”

“I don’t think -- “ she starts, but then he’s pulling the box out of his pocket and even though he literally would rather okay face a tsunami naked than open his eyes, he can still hear her sharp intake of breath. Oh god. 

“Okay -- okay darling, look at me all right?” He opens one eye, risks a glance upward to see her bent almost double, the cross pole of the tent across her shoulders. “There now, better?”

“Penelope --”

Maybe he feels the tension, or maybe he is just a tiny little asshole, but this, this moment, is the very moment Bertie chooses to rouse from his slumber and leap up at Penelope’s legs.

He launches himself with such force that the slippery nylon that makes up their bed shifts, and Penelope, already off balance and folded like a half shut knife, jumps in shock. The cross pole shudders and -- oh, shit.

Penelope lands in a heap, and the tent follows her collapsing on top of them like one of grandma’s souffles. Bertie whimpers unhappily, wriggling his way free of a sea of wet nylon to force himself bodily between them. He laps at Gordon’s shaking hand, then looks up at Penny with huge, innocent eyes.

Bertie, Gordon decides, has been spending far too much time with Parker. 

He goes to tell Penny as much, but to his horror he sees big, fat tears rolling down her cheeks, her eyes red and rimmed black with yesterday’s mascara. He scans her for wounds, protruding tent poles, anything that might explain the funny little gasping sounds she’s making, as though she can’t quite catch her breath.

“Are you hurt? What -- did you sprain something? Tell me where it hurts.”

Penelope shakes her head fiercely. “No, no I’m not hurt.”

She half laughs, a strained, breathless little thing, and moves to hover her hand over the little box. 

Gordon looks down. Penelope might be not quite touching it, but Bertie is resting his nose against the golden clasp holding it closed and looking up at Gordon like -- 

Like even the dog can’t quite believe the mess he’s making of this. 

“Oh don’t -- I’m sorry Penny, I’m sorry-- don’t cry. Oh wow, this has gone even worse than I expected.”

She laughs again, he can feel it against the crown of his head as he tries very hard to curl up into himself and disappear entirely. “Gordon Tracy, you are the most ridiculous man --”

“Don’t rub it in Pen, jeez.”

“Will you let me finish?” Her voice is sharp, and he snaps his head up. She’s smiling all the same, even though her cheeks are still streaked with tears “Thank you.” He just nods, lost for words, lost entirely and just waiting for her next words to set him back up. To show him where to go. They’re close enough in the wreckage of the tent for her to rest her forehead against his, her words quite as a whisper but all the clearer for them. “You asked me once if you were my favourite.”

Gordon swallows hard. “Yeah. I remember.”

She smiles, and their noses knock together. “Ask me again.”

“Am I your favourite?”

A huff of breath against his mouth. Irritable, but so close, so much closer than he’d ever thought he deserved. “Not that.”

“Wh--” And she pulls back, just enough. Just enough that he can see himself reflected in her pupils, blown wide and dark and waiting. “Oh.”

“Oh. And I’m not getting up.”

He spares a glance around them, the tent now more a cocoon than anything else. “Don’t think either of us are.”

“Gordon.” She reaches for the box with shaking hands, opens it, pulls out the ring and presses it into his hand. Rose gold. Pink, of course. Pretty and delicate and set with a stone that has outlived its last owner by some twenty years. There’s a scar across its surface, avalanche blue, but he kinda likes that. The promise of outlasting whatever the universe throws at them. Penelope’s breath catches, as she withdraws her right hand to scrub at flushed cheeks, leaves her left in his. “Ask me again.”

“Oh. Right.” There’s that. The asking. He takes another deep breath. Steadier. Certain. “Penelope,” he says, and man she’s still crying but she’s nodding and that -- that seems positive, right? He powers on. There’d been a speech. He’d practiced it on Alan, who’d swooned very beautifully right off the balcony and into the pool. He doesn’t bother with it now. Sticks to the basics. “I am an idiot.”

“Yes you are,” she agrees, and her smile, her smile is brighter than the sunshine, brighter than anything. It’s the only light he needs, the only hope.

“Do you think you could maybe marry me anyway?”

She kisses him, hot and open, tears salty on her lips and a plea on her tongue and together --

Together they taste like yes.

[atopearth]

Piofiore: Fated Memories Part 5 - Gilbert Redford Route

Yayyy Gil time! I'll ignore his weirdness in Orlok's route because I know he's cool at heart hahaha. Anyway, it was so cool how he just gave the people around him money due to the commotion with Luca stealing money from a random. He obviously takes care of people well and tries to keep peace with everyone as long as they're in his governing area. I think in terms of all the routes, I like how this one handled the "getting taken to the Mafia manor" part the most. Yang appearing by her bedside is nightmare fuel though lmao, that would be so scary. But anyway, her running away and bumping into Gil is very convenient but I'll take it because I can imagine him randomly walking around enjoying scenery or doing patrols lol. What I liked most though was that in this route, Lili gets to properly assess her own situation with Gil, and she properly requests his help because she understands that she's in danger for some reason and he's the only Mafia boss that can help her if she doesn't trust the others after that gun fight. I also liked how Gil was very upfront with the fact that he's protecting her because he likes beauties, but also because he knows that she must be important for whatever reason if Yang and them are all after her, so this will most likely be a beneficial position for him if he can keep her. And I think that's what's been lacking for the other routes - proper communication from the beginning. I like how unlike in Dante's route, Gil properly told Lili how everything is going at the church and it's kinda cute how in the other routes, she's forced to stay at the manor most of the time, but here, Gil wants her to be comfortable and do what she wants, so he'll accompany her around town and stuff. It's kinda funny how in this route, she's the one that's like shouldn't I stay here in the manor instead of going outside for my safety hahaha. Anyway, when Gil reassured Lili that the safest place in Burlone was next to him, I wanted to squeal, he's so cute but confident, I love it🤣

Lmao, I love how Oliver called Gil an idiot for picking up Lili off the street especially when she's being chased by other Mafia😂 I love how Gil pisses Oliver off with something new every time he says something hahahah, I can feel Oliver's stress🤣 On the other hand, Gil is my favourite type of leader, I just love how up and personal with all the people in town he protects, and I love how everyone loves and respects him in the same way. If I had to compare him to someone, I would think of Laguna from Final Fantasy VIII, because they're both people who go along with the flow and are inherently kind to others as a part of their personality, they don't even need to try because it's so ingrained into them, and I guess that's their charm. However, it seems that Gil is a ladies man whereas Laguna is adorably shy haha. Okay, I'll admit that I have a weak spot for guys with an eyepatch so dang, the gelato CG is so niceeeee. It really ended up being just like a date as Gil said haha. Gil being so good at picking out dresses and hair accessories for Lili is pretty cool haha. What a riot for Gil himself to be arrested. I wonder if this means the power balance is shaking now~ Anyway, I really like Lili and Gil's relationship because they're both so upfront with their questions and both answer each other's questions properly, I think it's really nice. I think Gil also really appreciated it when she told him that she would believe him whatever his answer was (if he did counterfeit money), because she trusts the person that he is, and I agree so. Trust Gil to be the one that Roberto can't really refute against because he's so sincerely honest about wanting to protect the people just as much as him, it was cute to see Roberto less crazy and emotional haha. Lmao at Roberto's tunnel vision though hahaha, all he was focused on was Gil, he didn't even realise Lili was there with him hahahah. I think it's really cute how Gil loves dressing Lili up but wouldn't force her to wear anything she doesn't want to wear.

I was so excited when they agreed to have Dante send a bodyguard for Lili as a compromise with Gil, because it was obvious it would be Leo and I adore him!!🥰 It was really sweet of Lili to thank Dante for protecting her all these years. I hope Luca has a good ending in this route, he's such a good boy. Gil saving Lili from some guy coming on to her was cliche but it was still cute to see because it was Gil hahaha. Loll, Gil acting like a little kid excited about the new guns and stuff was cute, to be fair though, I get all happy when packages are delivered too🤣 When they started gambling, it was obvious that Lili was going to be a "prize", and that Gil wouldn't allow that, so it would have to be Lili herself who agrees to it. Anyway, even though it was expected, I think it was probably heartwarming for Gil to see how much Lili trusts him that she's willing to bet herself on him winning. Omggg after realising that the casino is dodgy with the counterfeit money thing, I honestly didn't expect Lili to suggest the church as a meeting place for the Mafia bosses lmao. Like yeah they're civil (most of the time) but it doesn't change the fact that she could be endangering Sister Sofia and them if anything were to happen. Lmao at saying God doesn't mind them talking about the stuff they do if he knows it's helping the city kinda thing hahaha. I mean, yeah God is understanding I guess loll. It was nice to see Gil's perspective towards his feelings for Lili, I buy their relationship, they're cute~🥰 I never knew I needed a reasonable Roberto in my life but I guess I do now, he's actually pretty cool haha. I also didn't realise I needed a CG of Gil putting earrings on Lili because omg it's sweet, I love the putting on necklaces or earrings etc CGs, they're usually so beautiful🥺 It's so adorable how Gil is concentrating so hard in the CG trying to put the earrings on for Lili, I love it. I never really thought about Gil's eyepatch but it's nice to know that it's because his left eye is weak, so it's easier for him to focus with just his right eye, but because of that, he can't gauge distances well apparently, and that's why guns work well for him. I guess when you put it into that perspective, you can kinda see why he would have quite a disadvantage against people like Orlok and Yang who are apt at fighting close range. It's kinda sad to think about his eye being weak because he got hit by his abusive father, but at least it led to him having a better future in Italy than staying like that in America. Personally, I'm really glad that there's so much progress with Roberto, mainly glad for him and Marco since after this, Roberto can definitely become an even greater person and policeman, and also glad for Marco because he puts in a lot of effort hoping that Roberto will be able to understand that not everything is so black and white. It's just a sweet thing to see. It's also nice to see that in this route, Luca will have the chance to live, that's something I've definitely been hoping for.

It was really cool of Lili to straight up tell Gil how she felt towards him. Anyway, that went from sweet to sad. I was honestly so worried for Oliver, especially since he's such a faithful guy to Gil and the only thoughts he had before he was nearly killed was that he needed to be at the trial to clear Gil of his charges, so he couldn't die yet. I'm glad Marco and Roberto made it in time to save him, but I hope Nicola is okay... Although I'm sure Dante would have wavered, it was nice to see him level-headed and calm over Nicola's "capture" and understood that even if he did listen to them, it didn't necessarily mean Nicola was safe, so he might as well do what he should to protect Burlone. Anyway, the trial has a very incompetent prosecutor, not only does he show his emotions, make careless remarks and not seem to know anything, I have no idea why if this trial was "so important" they would have someone like him be the prosecutor. Anyway, I thought it was going to be more dramatic when Gil went into the flames to capture the Direttore but I guess not loll. Seeing Luca so healthy made me so happy~ Lmao at Luca and Oliver being on Lili's side when she was mad at Gil, they didn't even care about what she was mad at, they just knew he was definitely wrong hahaha. Wait, that was the best ending?! So rushed and anti-climactic lol, it was like yay we captured the guy, the end lol. Yeah that story was boring lol. But I do like how in this ending, the Mafia are living peacefully with each other, Roberto isn't so obstinate and Luca is happily alive. But is Nicola dead? That's sad if he is.. Lmao at Gil getting Lili all dressed up just to take her to a hotel and take it off loll, I gotta admit though, that red dress she was too embarrassed to wear before is really beautiful on her, I can see why Gil wanted to see her wear it lol. I liked how Gil got to use those new weapons he bought in the good ending lol. Anyway, the tragic ending is rather..awkward? Gil being found guilty was expected, and I guess even though it was super dodgy, if they're corrupted it's understandable lol, but I just found Orlok dying was so random lol. Like excuse me?? Orlok is the one that prides himself for being fast and alert, how could he get killed by some random?? He's someone even Yang has trouble with lol. I also find it rather silly that considering Dante is supposedly righteous and always wants to be "fair", he's okay with sacrificing Gil to gain the continued support of the church to protect Burlone lol. It's kinda sad that in the end Gil refused to take Lili with him no matter what even though it killed them both on the inside, but I personally think Lili should have expressed her feelings better to him so that he would reconsider. Still sad but I think the other tragic endings are better.

Overall, I honestly really like Gil. He's cool, he's kind, he's sweet, he's the whole package with how much of a gentleman he is and how charismatic he is with others. I also loved how much Oliver cared for him over his own life, it's like Nicola and Dante without the obsession hahaha. However, I do think Gil's route was pretty lacking. Not only was the counterfeit bills plot rather boring, the ending for it was so short and inconclusive because it was obvious the Direttore was behind most of it but why?! I don't feel like I learnt anything more than I did before. As for the romance, it suffers from the cliche of Gil doing every gentlemanly thing possible to make you swoon over him, in which I admit that it did make me really happy and I did enjoy it, but in terms of the events themselves, sometimes they were rather silly and more gentlemanly for the sake of the stereotype rather than being from Gil himself such as Gil insisting on going further with their relationship only after everything is resolved and then once it is, he can't "stop" himself from desiring her like lmao geez he's constantly lusting after her it felt like his gentlemanly acts before were a facade hahaha. Anyway, so yeah even though I do like Gil, I do think he suffers from being more of a stereotype than a proper "character" to me. Nevertheless, I still enjoyed the route because it was cute to see Lili and him have sweet little moments and build up their bond. I personally liked the Lili in this route the most because I thought she seemed the most mature, logical and honest with her thoughts and was straightforward about them with Gil, so extra points for that imo. Anyway if I had to pick favourite characters, it would definitely be in the order of Yang, Gil, Dante and then Nicola and Orlok tie, but when it comes to their route, it would be Yang, Gil and Nicola tie, Dante and then Orlok hahaha. Yes, Yang is practically perfect in terms of his character, VA, route and all the varying endings, I loved it so much I would play it again but I honestly can't say the same for the others lol. On to the finale!!

[muckrakerhq]

PRESENTING … FONDUE FOR TWO, EVERY TUESDAY, HOSTED BY JOEY HUMMEL-ANDERSON.

featuring… this week’s guests, @ivystjamess & @lincolnonline

fondue for two is a weekly internet talk show hosted by joey hummel-anderson. fondue for two, joey, and the muckraker team strive to get all the steaming gossip while he interviews guests of his choice over a steaming pot of cheese.

[Joey's room - once again, Joey sits across from his guests, but this time it's Ivy St. James and Lincoln Clarington-Smythe; Gil the Fish is in the same spot]

JOEY: Hi everyone! Today's guests are very special, since I have here with me McKinley's biggest bitches, Ivy St. James and the new kid that is already more popular than Fiona Beckett, Lincoln Clarington-Smythe! Do you guys feel honored to be here, on what is the greatest internet show of all time?

LINK: A title I am more than proud to share. I can also say with complete confidence that the bar for internet shows is so low that I can't dispute that this one may just be the best.

IVY: okay, winnie is totally a bigger bitch than me but i'm like happy to be here before her anyway. even if it's with the new boy.

JOEY: Okay, you guys could smile a little more though, this is the internet after all. Moving on to the first question, a fan actually sent this one and it's for Ivy! Ivy, is it true that you got Danny Zuko because, just like your mom, you have what people call "man hands"?

IVY: oh my god that's like so. . . mean? i dont have man hands and neither does my mom! but if the people like really wanna know, i have my dad's hands. mine look like the exact same as his, even when we used to do jazz hands in our family dance routines they were the exact same down to like every flutter of the finger.

JOEY: I wasn't the one who sent this in, so you can blame someone named LucyQ99, because she was the one who sent it. Moving on from the story about Ivy's hands that no one asked for, the next question is for Link! Is it true that you got kicked out of Dalton because you were caught having sex with someone on the stairs and not because of a list?

LINK: Unfortunately, no, there's been a mix up in stories. I was actually caught having sex with someone on the stairs last year and I lied and said I was helping him check for STD's because 'he was too scared to see the nurse.' The list thing was totes the reason and it was unjust so please email and call your local council and accuse Dalton of homophobia, that would mean a lot to me.

JOEY: You heard it here first, I will leave the phone number and email down below because Dalton is homophobic... Anyways, next question is for both of you, who is the second hottest guy at McKinley? I'm number one, obviously.

IVY: ugh that's like so totally easy, Joey! Everyone knows it's--

IVY: actually you know what? i bet link is like SO totally unbiased from personal experience with these guys. 

IVY: link, who do you like think is hottest?

LINK: Uh...okay, well, in all honesty, the bar in on the fucking floor. And as much as I know you hate to admit it, I'm gonna say Leo because he gives me big Jack Skellington vibes if Halloweentown had a film school and I'm really into that, ya'know. Also maybe Theo but only when I admire him from afar, I don't need to hear him talk, it ruins it for me.

IVY: oh my god.

IVY: PLEASE say you're joking like right now. 

IVY: leo? like? mccarthy?

LINK: Yeah, and? I like the angst of it all!

JOEY: Wait, Ivy you didn't answer, and I'm not even going to comment on that, Link... This is the last time you'll be on my show.

IVY: i dated leo for like eight months! so not cool! the angst like totally isn't worth it. and from personal experience? you're like definitely better off with theo.

IVY: joey i didn't answer because there's like. . . not even a second behind you. maybe a close fifth though. . . yeah!

LINK: Listen, I'm not gonna try anything with Leo, I respect his heterosexuality! I'm allowed to admire from my bubble of him being my manic pixie dream film bro! And stop avoiding Joey's questions, you're dodging and weaving that shit. You may be McKinley's lil' actress ingenue, but you're not a good liar.

IVY: i am like . . . an incredible liar!

JOEY: Okay, that's enough talking about Leo in my room, you guys are bumming out my whole area... I liked Ivy's answer, moving on! How do you guys feel about the musical?

IVY: thank you! anyhow, i'm gonna like totally make everyone forget who john travolta even is. duh. ever thought you could cry to a rendition of sandy? no? well just like wait until you hear mine.

LINK: I'm hype. I really don't care about musicals but I was born to play Rizzo, it just makes sense. I'm gonna steal the show and Ivy and....uh...no, no, I'll get it....Jonathan? Jason?......Anyways, Ivy and the Schuester guy playing Sandy, well I'm sure they'll be great too. I've never been too pure to be pink, that's for sure.

IVY: Julien. 

IVY: but yea like im sure you'll make a good Rizzo. that's a compliment I don't give lightly.

JOEY: Good! I can't wait until everyone else in rehearsal to not fit in the room because of your giant egos. And I do know what ego means, I learned that word recently. Okay, between you two, who's more talented? The people want to know.

LINK: Yeah, him. Big hair. I'll get to know him when I have to bully him on stage. And let's look at the facts; I can sing, I can act, I can dance, I can write and direct, I can and have arranged multiple Cupcakke songs into acapella versions, I can work industry standard special effects equipment, I can give you splits and dips and I dress like Sharpay Evans. Make your own conclusions on who's more talented.

IVY: Listen, everyone thinks I'm like kind of a bitch, but the fact of the matter is I'm not just a bitch. I'm a talented bitch. And if acknowledging my ability makes me a bitch then like . . . whatever! Link's stuff is impressive but at the end of the day, I managed to be successful in the arts and like a totally hot and popular cheerio at Mckinley. It's no easy feat juggling both. So like . . . the proof is in the pudding or whatever.

JOEY: There's pudding? I want pudding... Well, I guess it's up to everyone else to decide, please leave a comment and say who you think is more talented! Right, next question is a serious one - do you guys think Gil looks okay? He looks tired, right?

LINK: I mean, yeah, why lie, this fish is probably moments away from the sweet, salty grips of a literal watery grave. But, hey, I'm no fish expert maybe he just needs to pop a Zoloft.

IVY: Ew, morbid. Maybe he just needs to like nap!

JOEY: I think he'll be fine. He hasn't been the same since I found out he's a secret slumlord... [turns to the bowl] The way you treat those families is really mean and they don't deserve that, but I think there's still good in you... Right, since I like to end it on a positive note, the two of you have to say something nice about each other!

IVY: Even though he's kind of delusional about who's gonna be the Grease show stopper, for someone who came from like a private school, Link does dress nice!

LINK: Why, thank you. You are very pretty and I get what the hype is about. You have a nice face and from what I can tell you have talent and when I get famous and if you weren't straight, I'd totally consider you for a part as the Final Girl in one of my movies. I try not to work with hets, it's not personal, I promise.

IVY: i see 

IVY: but just so you know, i have like two gay grandpas and i'm jewish so like when I'm inevitably the best and only option you can pull that info for the sake of being diverse

JOEY: Right, that was kind of nice! Last question of the show, did you guys have fun here? And if you say no, you're not allowed in my house anymore.

IVY: i'd never be banned from your house but yea this was like super fun!

LINK: It was a blast. I should point out though that this fondue cheese kinda tastes like, um....pure garbage. But I can look past that.

JOEY: Anyways, thanks for watching everyone and I'll see you next week for another Fondue for Two!

 [The End]

[marvel-ousnesss]

The pirate and the witch (part four)

Pairing: Harry Hook x daughter of narissa!reader

Summary: Y/N, an orphan vk who was taken to auradon at a young age, returns to her old home by request of the crown prince. However, things tend to go south at the Isle of the Lost.

Warning: Mild cursing, use of alcohol, sword fighting (no super detailed descriptions)

Word count: 4460(ish)

A:/N: happy Christmas Eve eve!!!  Finally done with part four and turns out I ended up writing a plot that flows slower than intended (oops). I’m sorry for the wait but I’ve been sort of busy with holiday-related procrastination. Also…. I’m working on a request and a Bucky royal au which I’ll be posting soon. As always, lots and lots of love and thanks for reading ❤️ Pls tell me what you think.

(BTW… there’s a flashback at the end, it’s in italics.)

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE DISNEY DESCENDANTS CHARACTERS, THE PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN CHARACTERS NOR THE SANDERSON SISTERS. All credit goes to the creators, writers, and producers. Same with the HP charms, credit goes to J.K Rowling (for now, just present in the first parts).

part one        part two      part three      mobile masterlist

— Oi, lass, lass,— a familiar intone is heard when I open the window.

To my surprise, I spot Harry behind a trash container, with my cloak resting on his right shoulder.

When he sees my head peeking out of the second floor window, he pipes, — if you wanted to see me again, you should’ve just asked.

— Who says I wanted to see you, that was a hint for Gil to find.

He snickers at my words,— ya gaunnie come get yer manky cloak, or do I have to go up there?

—Shit, — I breathe — Just a second!

I close the window and look at Jay, who quirks a brow but doesn’t move from his spot on my desk. He began to explore my sketchbook app a few minutes ago, and seems to be completely immersed in it. Nevertheless, he puts the device down and chuckles, — This is you’re place, you know. Say the word and I’ll be out.

His words take me by surprise. Even if he’s been here for a few hours, I still can’t get completely used to the idea of such dangerous people, who are feared to death back home, being as decent and friendly as they have been during my stay here.

So, after a brief goodbye, he leaves and, after all of my Auradon-related stuff, I open the window once again.

— You already came all the way here, what’s a few steps up.

He’s about to make his way up the fire escape but, after a few steps toward it, he crosses his arms and says, — Yer right, I came to yer place, don’t I deserve a prize?

He’s such a flirt. After debating it with myself for a second, I make up my mind.

— Come here and get it, — I wink.

Without a second thought, he runs up the stairs outside the building and reaches my window in no time. What I’m I doing? No one was supposed to find out about this place, yet I’ve brought two vks here in just a day. I try to keep my cool as the pirate walks toward me, stopping about a foot away.

He smirks, —So, doll, ‘bout me prize.

I feel the heat in my cheeks when he takes a small step closer, placing a hand on the side of my waist.

—oh, right… that,——

Think fast, think fast….

I smile at him sweetly and kiss his right cheek, retrieving my cloak from his shoulder. — your welcome, — I smirk.

He laughs at my antics, — yer kidding? Don’t ya say that’s it! Glaickit of ya to think I’ll leave with just that.

—Who says you have to leave?— I utter the words while stepping back in order to sit on my bed.

His brows jump up and his ocean blue eyes shine with mischief and surprise. — What’d you suggest, doll.

— Staying here for a while but, now that I think of it, wouldn’t it be more fun to go out? The docks, maybe?

— Nah, depends on what you want to do. — his words keep coming out laced with an air of innuendo.

Not wanting to give up yet, I decide to play coy. — You know, the usual; take a walk, grab a bite, ‘keep the heid’, don’t you have to do rounds?

This time, it is a mix of mischief and excitement that floods him. — Yer right, can’t wait to see the faces of those wingnut vampires when ya scare the shit outta them!

— yeah… I’m thrilled.

Why did I suggest this, of all possible things to do? The question seems to be trapped in my mind. Ever since we left the apartment, Harry began to show a new side of himself, one that I had only seen in the papers I read beforehand.

He invited me to do his rounds with him, on the way to the docks and, needless to say, my magic resulted completely useless when it came to achieving the level of fear that Harry had in mind.

— Not so badass now? bastard, — he hisses, with a smirk on his face as his hook grabs some guy by the jacket. — whatcha gonna do?

The guy limits himself to whimper and let out some sort of cry. Given that the pirate has already grabbed everything that caught his eye, together with the designated amount of golden coins, the business there is dimmed as finished and we finally  begin walking to Ursula’s.

—So what ya think, see yourself doing this with me and the crew?— he asks.

—Not really, not one for all of the intimidating.

— Ain’t so sure ‘bout that, lassie. You’ve done pretty well for what I’ve seen. — it is kind of weird to hear such words coming from him; even more so when sincerity is all across his handsome features.

I snicker, — yeah, right; I can’t even get a fly to run away.

His chin lifts up and his chest comes forward subtly, — I’d help you with that, if you decided to join us. In fact, — he wiggles his brows with a smirk, — I’d train you.

— As tempting as that sounds, I’ll have to decline, Hook. Got better things to do:

I shouldn’t even think twice about declining but something about exploring my vk side a bit further than I’ve been able to doesn’t sound completely crazy. Maybe is the way he looks at me, or should I say through me, with his ocean eyes; or the way in which those same eyes shine when he’s about to wreak havoc? Don’t really know, and not sure if I really want to.

Guess I’ll just have to solve this problem in the way I do it best, ignoring my questions until they go away.

I begin to run and chant, — Race you to the docks!

….

Panting, I stop in front of Ursula’s and get inside. The place is packed with members of Uma’s crew, some of which seem to recognize me. They acknowledge me without hostility, still thankful for what I did for them the night of the party.

—Look, Uma, Y/N’s here! Bet she’s looking for Harry, — Beams Gil, the blond and tall guy who first broke the ice with me the night I met the crew.

Uma smirks and approaches me, — Look, witchy, not sure if you got the memo but one night stands are supposed to be just that, and last one night, nothing more.

— Thanks for the heads up, cap, but I’m actually here to grab a pint. — I sit down on a barstool.

— in that case, — she turns away, visibly relaxing, — Bonnie! A beer for bibbity bobbity bullshit over here!

When Uma is behind the bar again, Harry, who had been inside and contemplating the scene, approaches me.

— Sorry ‘bout that, Uma just knows me too well,— he ventures. — Ain’t good for the business to have every lady in the isle claiming to see me, now is it?

His cockiness is amusing as it is annoying. — Oh, of course — I ponder.— that would be completely tragic.

He chuckles at me and steals a sip from my still full beer. Honestly, I don’t even like beer that much; just ordered it to play the part. Go

— Yer different, though, — he claims, but I don’t believe a word.

— Do tell, why is that?

— You’re not as annoying. Actually, I kinda like having you ‘round, — he flirts.

— So you, Mr. use-‘em-‘n-dump-‘em, are claiming I’m special? — I gasp mockingly, — what an honor.

We both laugh a bit, share another sip of beer, and he continues.

He shrugs, — Yer also fast. Not enough, but fast; even if you were playing dirty.

��Oh, gods, aren’t you one to talk about that! — I accuse,— and, given the case that I did play dirty, how did I do it?

— Lookie here — he gesticulates, motioning himself. — Racing a hungover pirate ain’t fair, besides, I had too much clothes on.

I chuckle, part of me wishing I could wipe that smirk off his face. — You’re just a bad loser, I’m pretty sure you’re always hungover; and, as for your clothes, not sure how that’s related to me kicking your ass.

— How low do ya think of me, doll, ya think I’m a bad loser? — he fakes a gasp. — and, as for my clothes, —his tone is mocking, — can’t you just enjoy me charm and help me solve the problem? But, in case you wanted a serious answer for your question, nakedness makes me more aerodynamic.

— wouldn’t you like that, Captain cockiness.— my brow quirks up. — And seriously, aerodynamic? Yeah, right.

— Not as much as ya would, my little witch.

I scoff as my eyes drift over to the window. The day is warm despite the lack of sun, so I suggest, — I think I’m gonna go for a walk. Come with me?

…….

The sound of the waves crashing against the docks is one that I’ve loved my whole life, back home, my dad and I go for boat rides often. However, here there’s a bunch of noise that accompanies the punches of water against wood and stones. The market is busy as we walk, but most of the catches turn out to be dead fish and trash that arrives from Auradon.

— I still don’t believe you, you know? It’s impossible for you to fit the grip of your hook inside your mouth; besides, how can I believe you if your too chickened up to prove it,— my arms cross expectantly.

Since we got out of Ursula’s, Harry’s been telling me a bunch of stories of his and Gil’s drunken deeds, and I may have also revealed a few of mine and Chad’s own disventures. For the last five minutes, he’s been trying to convince me that he’s capable of putting the whole base of his hook inside his mouth, but refuses to show me.

— Lass, ya’ll have to take me word for it. I’m still a few bottles of scotch away from doing that again.

—pff,— I playfully shove him sideways. — Yeah, right.

He places the tip of his hook on his chin, pretending to think, — you know, shouldn’t have spilled so much, now ya have lots of dirt on me.

—What am i gonna use it for? You know what, never mind. — I proclaim, — You, Harry James Hook, just made the worst mistake of your life. Now I’ll overthrow you and Uma, and take over the lost revenge. Buahahaha!

He laughs at me and counters, — seriously lass, some of these things, I’ve never told anyone before.

—relax Hook, you can trust me, — I smile, with the sincerity I can muster.

— Oh, okay then.

After the short moment of vulnerability, we fall into a void of uncomfortable silence. We continue to walk along the brick street next to the sea, and my hands seem to find a permanent place inside the pockets of my jacket. Harry softly whistles a melody with his eyes locked down, but looks up and smiles as we reach a familiar ship.

His frame stiffs for a moment as he inquires — You sure I can trust ya?

I hesitate, — Yes, of course.

— Then come on, you’re meeting someone. — he grins.

The ship seems to be isolated from the rest, yet it is full of crew members that work and bounce from one side of the deck to the other.

When we enter their sight, they stop to stare at us and pull out their swords.

One of them speaks with a threatening and raspy voice, — Not outsiders in the Black Pearl, Hook.  

— Relax, Y/N ain’t gonna start beef, Barbossa. — Harry assures, — where’s Jack at?

— Sure hope she does cause some trouble, we could always use some tasty ladies here in this humble ship. — the malice in his expression makes me shiver, not to mention the wicked grin coming from the monkey on his shoulder, so I move slightly behind Harry.

At this point, it’s evident that the younger pirate’s patience is becoming thinner. — She’s not here for that, now where’s Jack?

Barbossa’s pounding laugh comes laced with his response, — His chambers, drinking. Good luck getting him outta there.

So, shielding me from the Wolfish looks sent by some crew members, Harry drags me to what I assume is the entrance of the captain’s quarters.

He knocks three times and a groan is heard on the other side, right before the breaking of a bottle and an incoherent train of curse words.

The door opens to reveal a tanned middle aged man sporting wild dreadlocks and a bored expression. However, his facade changes as soon as he registers that Harry was the one who dared interrupt him.

—Powder Monkey! What brings you to this old man’s ship?— his arm flies over Harry’s shoulder and he drags him inside.

I follow closely behind. My eyes scan the wooden floor and walls, the scattered pieces of green glass that I’m sure recently fell down, and a table full of unopened bottles, surrounded by five stools.

— Just thought I’d come ‘n greet, so you pack of salty dogs wouldn’t forget ‘bout me.

— Nah, wouldn’t forget ‘bout my favorite boot cleaner, — he smiles, showcasing a few golden teeth, — now would I?  

Harry’s only response is to laugh as he opens a bottle of rum, — Also, wanted you to meet a, uhh, an acquaintance. Jack, Y/N; Y/N, this is Jack.

Acquaintance, seriously?

He turns my way, smirking and stretching out a dusty hand, — Well, let me say, m’lady, any friend of Jimbo here is a friend of mine. —After we shake hands, he sits down on the table, grabbing yet one more bottle, — Now tell me, what stupidity have you done to cross ways with this wonky piece of sea garbage?

I’m about to start, but Harry interjects, — She can’t tell you nothing without a dram.

— Only got rum, Hookey, who do ya think yer talking to, Turner?— he scoffs.

— Rum it is, then.

Awkwardly, I state, — Actually, I’m good as it is, gentlemen.

— You don’t drink? — This time, Sparrow breaks into laughter,— got a princess in your hands, Harry. But m’lady, — he turns toward me,— we all drink here, ‘s the code.

I chuckle, — Fine, but just a few drinks.

…

Thank god I have my boots on, I think to myself as I look at the floor. A fit of giggles scale my lips, followed by an almost unperceivable hiccup. It’s been a few hours since we arrived at the Pearl, and we’ve been drinking nonstop. At the beginning, it was only Jack and the two of us, but then Gil ended up here, together with maestre Gibbs.

I told them how I met Harry, but that’s the only truth that I’ve spilled. After all, knowing where I’m from would be enough motivation for these men to make me walk the plank and straight into the kraken’s nest. From then on, I’ve been mostly listening.

— So, then I was like ‘proceed,’ but they noticed I wasn’t white so the one with the fancy wig went all ‘it’s Jack Sparrow, it’s Jack sparrow!’ and I was like ‘nub-uh, I’m justice Smith.’ — Jack speaks  between laughs, with exaggerated esticulations, as he takes another sip of some cheap wine; the rum ran out like an hour ago.

— You saved my ass that day, Jack, I remember it like it happened this very morning, — Gibbs patted his friend’s shoulder.

Gil chimes in, — like that time you saved us from the Huns, we wouldn’t have lasted two seconds without you and Anamaria.

— I haven’t heard that one yet, — I voice, utterly curious.

— Well, — Jack announces, then yawns. — you’ll have to hear it another time, Y/N/N. I've got some business, you know? Gotta sleep for a few years now.

Being the ship’s captain, and the two young pirates’ mentor, no one’s hesitant to comply. We get up and say goodbye, then make our way outside.

All three of us are still fairly drunk, so I decide to take this chance to see if I can get them to open up.

— I still haven’t heard the story of you guys and the Huns.

— ‘S a long one, lass. — states Harry, placing an arm around my shoulder, to which I respond by loosely grabbing his wrist with my right hand, as to keep his arms from moving.

— Well, we’ve got time! — I yowel.

— You’re gonna love it, Y/N. — As we walk, Gil begins to explain, taking a sip of the bottle we grabbed from the Pearl.— We were like seven when that happened?

----

Harry and Gil walked silently, as they kept an eye on Shan Yu’s men. It was Harry’s first official mission as part of his father’s crew, or it was gonna be, and he had called Gil and Uma for help and support. Sadly, the young sea witch had been grounded that very morning, so she couldn’t be there with the two boys. To say that they had absolutely no idea what they were doing was a complete understatement. They were clueless.

So, they did what seemed rational at the moment: follow the enemies and wait for the perfect moment to attack. Or… at least that’s what Gil had heard his father say when he talked about hunting.

—Shh!! — scolded Harry, — you’re gonna make them see us, Gil!

The blond boy muttered a quick ‘sorry,’ and continued walking, this time avoiding collisions.

— Harry, they’re getting into a warehouse, we should wait out here. — Gil intoned, chocolate eyes shining with fear.

Harry immediately countered and, on the contrary to his friend’s, his blue orbs were  flooded with pride and determination. —No, this is my chance to prove father that I can be a real pirate. If we make it, he will train me.

----

We continue walking through the very same road that we took earlier today (yesterday, as midnight passed a few hours ago). Harry’s arm remains placed around me and mine has now found its way around his middle.

As he speaks, I feel the soft vibrations of Harry’s voice and the alcohol that pleasantly poisoned his breath; — so, we decided to ambush the Huns right there.

— We decided? You manipulated me into going, — Gil points out, giggling.

Harry sighs and grumbles, — Anyway, the point is we went inside and here we are; so, continue talking Gil. Before sunrise, if you can.

----

The two boys literally crossed a door that had no way back. They hid behind a few boxes of what they supposed were ingredients for Dim Sum, and carefully watched as the Hun soldiers opened a chest full of gold that they had stolen from the Jolly Roger.

— There it is, — Harry whispered in awe.

— It’s a lot of gold, — Gil quavered.

Back then, they were convinced that no one was aware of their presence, but a certain pirate lord who had his eyes on the very same prize had seen them from the start.

— Isn’t that Hook’s boy? — asked Anamaria.

—Yup.

She continued to press on the topic, — shouldn’t we take him? He’d be useful against his father; we could get some money out of him.

—Nope.

— And why the hell not, Jack?

The captain sighed, as he adjusted his position on the ceiling bar, — Jim doesn’t pose a threat at the moment and nothing he has seems to be worth it these days, the boy’s useless.

The Huns continued to speak in hushed tones, reason why none of the intruding parties were able to register what was happening.

The kids didn’t even have time to move when they felt the cold metal of swords against the back of their necks. With their hands raised in defeat, they stood up and faced Shan Yu’s soldiers.

—Your father didn’t even have the balls to come here himself?

— Maybe we could send him your fingers? Or maybe even your left hand? That way you’d get matching hooks.

The grown men spoke as they advanced on the two boys, making them head toward the wall of the building. When they had them cornered, both Huns raised their swords and both boys shielded their heads with their arms; but no harm came their way.

Instead, they saw the Huns fighting two other people, whom Harry recognized as members of the enemy pirate crew, the tripulation of the Black Pearl.

— So that’s why you went after the kids —chortled the man. — Your technique is worse than your fashion sense, and that’s saying something.

Both boys giggled at his words.

The man’s combat was sparkled with humor and witty comments, while the woman fought silently and with a stern expression, only groaning every few hits. Both of them had impeccable technique, and they seemed to be dancing in perfect coordination.

After what had seemed to be hours, the Huns ended up dead.

— I can’t believe I agreed to come with you in the first place, — hissed the woman, cleaning her left boot with the end of her puffy white sleeve.

— Come one, don’t tell me it wasn’t fun!

She ignored her companion and approached the boys, who had been contemplating their interaction.

— Hey, — she smiled, — I’m Ana, and that idiot over there is captain Jack Sparrow.

Harry stepped forward, — I’m quartermaster Harry Hook, and this is my friend Gil.

—Quartermaster? Harry, your father doesn’t even let you near the crew.

Harry glared at his friend and decided to explain to the two strangers, — well, I’m not exactly a quartermaster… yet! — he assured. — but I’m gonna be one, when my dad decides to train me.

It was the man’s turn to speak, and his voice came tinted with venom. — You mean Jim sent you here without training? Not even I would do that.

— My dad doesn’t think I have what it takes to be a pirate. I was gonna bring him his treasure back and show him I do have it, but I guess you’re gonna take it, right?

‘Not the puppy eyes, not those; anything but the puppy eyes!’ Jack pleaded to himself, but he ended up looking at the boy and giving in.

He groaned, and then spoke up. — We’ll all go back to the Pearl. There, well split the gold and maybe you’ll learn a thing or two.

— Uma’s gonna love this, — grinned the boys in unison.

----

We arrived at the end of the road, so the three of us sat on the edge of the dock, feet dangling over the water.

— So, that’s basically it. — concludes Gil. — Jack taught us everything we know about being pirates. Then, he helped us get the Lost Revenge.

I take a drink, — And, you’re all still pretty close to him. That’s really cool.

Harry chuckles, — well, we kind of owe him everything we are.

I lift my head, which was resting on his shoulder, and glance at him. — That’s not true; he may have trained you, but I’m sure you all have become your own selves.

— Don’ be stupid, lass, he did it because it meant a future a alliance and an advantage, not because he has a teaching vocation.

I sigh, looking for adequate words to phrase what I want to say, — Then you guys owe him what you know about piracy, nothing more.

None of the two pirates said anything.

You know, — Gil sighed, — he’s been there for us more than our own parents. He even saved us from Hook’s crew once, when we were thirteen.

—Still, he did it because we’d signify power for him and not because he cared about us. — Harry takes a long swing of liquor.

I sigh, — Still, I think that, even if he didn’t care at the beginning, he’s fond of you guys now.

Harry’s about to object, but he thinks for a moment and mumbles, — he’s been around for quite a while, even for me sisters.

—I’m just pretty glad that we found him, — Gil hummed, — since I began training with him, my father has been going on about how proud he is that I’m big and strong, and how he hopes that I’ll get myself a nice lady.

— Funny, — Harry says with a tint of grief, — my dad stopped talking to me when the moment I stepped on the Pearl.

Once again, we fall into silence. I fall backwards and look at the cloudy sky, Gil and Harry soon follow and, once again, I find a spot right under the first mate’s arm.

— I’m kind of sleepy, guys.— Gil voices my thoughts, we should head back to the Revenge.

Without complaining, the three of us stand up and walk back to the ship. Instead of heading to their quarters, Harry and Gil lead me to a few hammocks that are placed on deck for those on night guard.

Harry takes off his boots and coat, sitting on one, —‘m sure Uma won’t mind if we use these for tonight.

—Yeah, no big deal, — Yawns Gil.

— Kay.

I’m already beginning to sober up, so sleep is beginning to hit me. Without a second thought, I lay down and wrap myself in my cloak. I drift off to sleep, and my head clears.

It only lasts a few hours, though. I wake up with nausea and my head pounding. Sitting up, decision which immediately regret, I look around for Harry and Gil but turns out I’m alone. I get up and rub my eyes, walking towards Frollo’s creperie, which is a few blocks away from Ursula’s.

I arrive and bark my order, like I’ve seen people do it around here. Then, with a huff, I sit down and quickly glance at my watch.

9:30 am… shit!

Tags: @criticizing-blogger​  @aspitefullittlebeing​  @treestarrrrrrrr​

[atomicstrawbrys]

A.K. (3/?)

Alfred is a high school star with everything he could possibly want- until a student comes from England and suddenly becomes priority number one. USUK. High school AU. //

Previous / Next

“You did what?!” Gilbert laughed, pounding his fist against Alfred’s bedroom wall as he laughed. “Jesus, Al, I always thought you lacked some common sense, but you gave him an allergic reaction?!”

Alfred felt his cheeks redden, and he turned away. “Yeah, well, it’s not like I meant to! I thought, I dunno, I thought it would be romantic!” He whined. Alfred had invited Gilbert over after school and confided both about his crush and his failed attempt to woo him, and he was beginning to think that doing so had been a mistake.

Gilbert’s shrieking laughter started up anew, and he fell back against Alfred’s bed. “Alfred, you are the biggest goddamned idiot I’ve ever met!”

Alfred exhaled, lying beside him on the bed. He stared up at the ceiling, examining the faded and admittedly tacky poster of a ‘hot cheerleader.’ He remembered being attracted to this once, but the model’s candy-apple red lips and bright blue eyes didn’t do it for him anymore. His thoughts wandered to a radioactive green swathed in deep purples and mysterious blacks, and a blush rose to his cheeks. His voice grew soft.

“What if I’m in love with him, Gil?”

Gil paused, for once taking a moment to mull the idea over. “Well, maybe, but I don’t think so...I think that to love someone, you gotta know ‘em, and you don’t really know anything about this guy.”

“But I-”

“No, you don’t. You might think you do, you might think you wanna be with him forever, but that’s just called being horny, man.” Gilbert laughed, and Alfred elbowed him.

“Gilbert-!” Alfred groaned.

“Just hear me out! Listen, Antonio, Francis and I are going to a movie after school tomorrow. Tell ya what, you and Arthur can come along. We’ll even make sure you sit together, provided he wants to come. You can get to know him some more, see if you really do like him, and you’ll be with friends, so it won’t be as awkward.”

“That...sounds good, actually. What kinda movie is it?”

Gilbert smirked. “Horror.”

“You’ve GOT to be kidding me!”

Gilbert just laughed.

The next morning, Alfred approached Arthur’s locker before first period, clearing his throat to get his attention.

“Uh, h-hey,” He smiled, and Arthur acknowledged him with a nod.

“Andrew. I hope the morning’s been well.”

“Oh, uh, sure.” Alfred ignored that Arthur had managed to get his name wrong yet again. He could always correct him at the theater. “I uhm, wanted to ask you something.”

At this, Arthur paused, and though he still wouldn’t look at Alfred, his tone did seem a little more interested.

“What is it?”

“Do you...want to go see a movie with me? It’s uh, Attack of the Mutant Zombies Four. You’ll love it! So...will you come?” Alfred asked, wringing his hands in front of himself. “I think you’d have fun, a-and you should see the town some, with you being new and all..”

Arthur shut the door to his locker and turned to face Alfred, looking up at him. Alfred gulped.

“So...this is a date, then?” Arthur tilted his head, eyebrows furrowing.

“NO! Nonono- God, no, Some of my friends are coming too! You can meet some more people, have some fun, whaddaya say?” Giving him a crooked smile, Alfred crossed his fingers behind his back.

Arthur looked down, tugging on one of his many ear piercings. His lip drew into an adorable pout, but it disappeared almost as soon as Alfred noticed it. “I guess I could go. I’ll text my brother and tell him I’ll be late. Thanks for the invitation. I have to get to class- I’ll meet you here when school lets out.”

And with that he was gone, leaving Alfred to bask in the euphoria of acceptance.

He was going to hang out with Arthur!

True to his word, Arthur met up with Alfred in front of their lockers. Francis, Gilbert, and Antonio were there too, and Matthew had even decided to tag along, pretending not to notice the smitten looks Gilbert always gave him whenever he was around.

“Alfred? Do you and Arthur want to ride with me?” Matthew asked, jingling the keys to his truck. “We can split three up in each car, so no one has to ride alone.”

After looking to Arthur for a curt nod of approval, Alfred agreed, and when they climbed into the back seat of Matthew’s truck, he could only hope that his heart wasn’t beating too loudly.

Matthew was quiet as he drove- he always was, so Alfred took the opportunity to ask Arthur a few questions. He did want to get to know him, after all, and right now he had his attention all to himself.

“So! England, that’s pretty cool. Why’d you move to some dumpy old town in America?”

Arthur frowned at the question, looking out the window and watching the power lines go by. “Dad said the change of scenery would be good. I’m here with him and my older brother. His name is Alistair. My brother, I mean. Not my dad. His name is Calum.”

“So...what about your mom?” Alfred scooted a little closer, and Arthur tensed, quickly putting his hood over his face.

“She didn’t...accept me, I guess. She ‘n dad divorced over it and now I’m here. I don’t want to talk about her.”

“Okay, okay…” Alfred bit his lip, lightly patting Arthur’s shoulder. “M’sorry. I shouldn’t have been pushy. I hope you like it here, though.” Alfred gave him a small smile, catching Arthur’s gaze. “I uh, I think you’re really cool, Arthur.

For just a moment, Alfred thought he caught a hint of red blooming on Arthur’s face, but the hood was shoved down further and he turned away again.

“Yeah. Thanks, Arnold.” Arthur mumbled.

Alfred only sighed and shot an exasperated smile over to Matthew.

Gilbert and the others were already waiting for them inside the theater when they walked in, tickets in hand. Alfred had paid for Arthur’s, and though he was certain Arthur noticed, he didn’t say anything. He also got two sodas and a large popcorn, just in case, though Arthur did have to help him carry it all.

The ticket vendor took each of them in turn, tearing their tickets and repeating the same monotone “Second door on the left” whenever one of them passed through. Alfred and Arthur were the last to do this, the other four walking ahead of them. Arthur didn’t seem to be in a hurry, though, so Alfred kept pace with him. Once they reached the door he started to gesture to it, only to notice Arthur staring at the sign for another showing, which had started only a few minutes ago. “Love at First Sight” was the title, and Alfred supposed it must be a romance.

“...Do you....want to go see that instead?” Alfred asked, Arthur jolting as he realized he’d been noticed.

“No, no, I..it’s okay. You want to go to the other one, and all your friends are in there…” He rubbed his arm, suddenly seeming very small.

Alfred glanced back at the other screening room, then back at Arthur.

“...It’s okay.” Alfred smiled, his voice soft. “I like romance, too. We can catch up with them after.”

For the first time since he’d met Arthur, Alfred watched as his crush smiled fully, up to his eyes. Unlike the simple amused grins and smirks he’d caught before, this smile was purely genuine, and Alfred felt his heart ache over it.

“Well, then. I guess we’d better go in before we miss any more previews. I love watching the trailers.” Arthur waved him along and opened the door to the screening room, sodas still tucked carefully in the crook of one arm.

They found a seat in the center of the room. There weren’t many others around- apparently, the movie they’d given up was far more popular. Still, Alfred couldn’t bring himself to care. He shot off a quick text to Matthew to let him know that they’d catch up after, then turned his phone off so he could enjoy Arthur’s company, as well as the film.

In all honesty, Alfred didn’t remember much of the movie. He was sure it was good, though, as it kept Arthur entertained for the whole duration. Alfred, however, could only look at him, and when their hands brushed in the popcorn bucket, he couldn’t help but sigh at the way Arthur’s fingertips gently ghosted along his palm before pulling away.

Yes, he was very glad they’d seen this movie instead.

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Random scattered thoughts about D3 under the cut

*The fact that everyone has basically abandoned Audrey though......where goodness doesn't get better? More like 'we'll abandon you once your dumped by our king and also rub it in your face that you couldn't hold a prince like your mother could'- also Audrey knows about the love spell and WHY Mal did it, but if that's the, case then everyone knows and still doesn't care that Mal did that- like the one person with brain cells is Audrey and shes the villain of this movie.

*Queen of Mean is a bop though- its one of the only valid songs in this movie, but also with the evil laughter almost that could be heard BEFORE Audrey puts on the crown, it makes me wonder if they planned to have Audrey be possessed after all.

*One Kiss is literally just gay panic the song, no I don't take arguments its literally Evie in gay panic mode and its Disney having to do that one heterosexual song to remind us that no, only heterosexual couples are valid in this universe- also despite dating for three years, Evie struggles to tell Doug she loves him and even doesn't believe her true loves kiss wont work???? WOW- can we say, clearly goals to have a relationship where bae stalks you originally and you struggle to tell him you love him after three years of dating and after sharing a cottage with him?

*Night Falls is a cool song, but I love how as soon as Uma tries to lead, Mal gets bitchy and acts like she can lead a sword fight better then a pirate captain could- like, mal chill, your not queen yet.

*Mal as Hades daughter.......lemme just uh, stress that's the worst twist in history, literally over-powers Mal once more with now god blood- and Do What You Gotta Do is literally daddy issues the song, and despite having the same parenting as Maleficent with how he neglected Mal basically, Hades is somehow the better parent?? HOW?! Also its never showed how Mal learnt this information.....did Disney forget to write that in or- and of course, Mal must be the only VK of the core four with a good parent- cause of course, Mal must have everything as always.

*Audrey singing Happy Birthday while cursing the party and singing 'dear jane' while smiling evilly......can we just uh say, she at least got down with the aesthetic of being a villain?

*Oh yeah, speaking of villains- despite being promoted as villains, Hades does nothing basically besides drain Mal of her magic and all 'evil' scenes from trailer is just him doing random shit or good shit, while Uma is more of a anti-hero while Celia is kinda just there doing scamming and such- Audrey was the only accurate villain to promotion and even then she only got one trailer.

*My Once Upon A Time is literally Pity Me the song and Mal even sings at the end about reaching greatness and such- Jay, Evie, Carlos and Ben got stonned for this shit.

*Also yes, they literally stonned Ben, Carlos, Jay and Evie cause only Mal can take part in final fight.

*ALSO- MAL LIED- like, girl literally lied to her friends about the isle barrier and didn't tell them she was going to seal it up, and when confronted about it, she acts like she had no choice when she MADE the decision on her own and then after friends get stonned, she goes into pity song mode and doesn't suffer much consequences for the lie afterwards.

*Audrey saying to Mal though about the love spell and how its a touching story for the grandkids.......grandkids in the future felt that burn.

*Mal is cursed into a old hag and Ben into a beast......except Mals curse wears off under the barrier while Bens is soon enough fixed by Jane blasting enchanted lake at him- just......cant have true love fix curses like they do in the movies, nah, that means our couple being true love.

*Audrey nearly fucking dies- thanks plot for nearly killing the WOC princess.

*"Mal came through"- yeah, after planning to seal up the barrier and abandon every kid on the isle basically- but its okay they didn't know so its okay, TIME TO CELEBRATE MAL AGAIN-

*Lady Tremaine's character is fucking weird- in descendants 2 they say shes not a good grandma, but here she is?! Can Disney make up their mind on how the characters are written?!

*Celia and her relationship with her father though is precious, y'all can fight me on it.

*Mal literally saying she has to be queen of the isle as well- one, excuse you that's Uma's title and two, the isle IS apart of Auradon and is a PRISON, then again, descendants 2 forgot this detail when trying to act like being from a place where VKs are abused by their parents is something you cant ignore so why am I not surprised Descendants 3 is continuing that trend.

*Mal is drained of her magic but this isn't even explored cause she gets it back when Hades gives her the ember- so guess we cant even see Mal be forced to fight a battle without magic.

*Also Hades gives Mal the ember at the end for good- BUT WHAT WILL SHE DO WITH IT?! Its probably gonna go in the museum lol- so he basically lost his weapon as well.

*The Smee twins are also precious, and the fact that Smee cares about them is adorable- plus Smee is kinda accurate in design so.

*Jay being a big brother to all....precious- but also hes clearly gay for Gil sorry don't make the rules.

*Carlos and Jane must be protected from the plot.

*Evie's plot is good as well, but her whole 'struggling to say I love you to doug' is still bullshit plot.

*Doug is as boring as ever- next.

*Uma is a queen as always- her boys were so happy to see her again and she looked so happy to see them as well, let alone seeing the sun finally when the barrier fell at the end.

*Which brings me to uh, the ending.....THEY TORE DOWN THE BARRIER- like, the entire Isle is free now, not just the VKs but also villains- VILLAINS WHO IN FIRST MOVIE WANTED REVENGE- villains who will likely hurt their kids in Auradon still and villains who will likely not want to play peaceful and happy families- I thought Mal knew how villains worked, but she thinks villains will wanna play good guys? What happened to 'your parents cant reach you here' in film 1? NOW THEY CAN- Jasmine already fucking calling bullshit if Jafar thinks he can roam free.

*Hades at the end.......uggghhhh- Mal as his kid still makes no sense and never will and we get it, protective dad joke- WE GET IT- god, those jokes tire me sometimes.

*Disney really better not be acting like they deserve an award for that Hades and Mal twist- everyone saw it coming, you gave it away with Mal's hair and the teaser trailer- which is also never explained in D3 so lol.

*Disney: *doesn't have Lonnie being mentioned at all* Lonnie: "Am I a joke to you?"

*Chads weak as always- again, next.

*Audrey does get a apology finally but um, it took THREE YEARS to do so! Y'all asked for her revenge! Like, I love Ben but who the fuck says to a pissed off person that's about to curse you and your trying to talk them out of it, "I'll forgive you" like- DUDE NO-

*VK Day is still bullshit and that's just facts- also I love how they like I wish we could take you all- WHY. CANT. YOU?! You have power to take them all of it! But you DONT! In fact, Mal later decides to seal up the barrier at one point meaning she had to abandon the VKs there and even prevent Celia from seeing her dad again! So guess she forgot the VKs and was like 'yeah seal that fucker up cause Hades stole my magic'.

*Mal needing cheering in final fight......yayyy- I didn't need anymore reminders this was a Mal movie.

*Remember when HSM3 at least felt connected to the prior movies? D3 doesn't even FEEL connected- your expected to read books that may not stand a chance at getting mentioned- also had a entire different thing with Mal's dad but Disney erased that despite connecting the books each time they said to read a book before seeing the film- and in D3, a lot of shit just feels separate to the previous two- let alone the major time skip making it harder to connect- with Young Justice, while timeskips happen you still get hints at what happened inbetween those timeskips- but with D3? None is mentioned- so your left with this as the last movie and yeah, its just messy really.

*Well at least Huma won- we got one good ship in this movie at least- too bad its surrounded by a mess.

*Thank fuck there's no more descendants movies after this- sure, its sad and descendants still has a place with me- well with the aspects I like/the characters I like- but at the same time, a fourth descendants would be disrespectful to Cameron Boyce, the only Carlos really and of course, considering how messy D3 was and how Mal centred it became, a fourth movie really is not in the future- its sad I know, but at the same time, at least descendants can live on in fandom.

[benjaycaptain]

descendants pokemon au because why not

world building is thus:

pokéballs aren’t really a thing anymore except in like extreme dangerous transportation situation. it’s common practice/courtesy to leave your home with only one or two of your poké-buddies, depending on their size of course

gathering a team for fighting purposes is also not really a thing anymore. it’s mostly contest like events or competitions that occur nowadays

except for like. on the island but. that’s a given.

of course, sometimes pokemon like to defend their human partner’s honor so they decide themselves to duke it out [in a respectable way and never to the point of exhaustion] 

idk that’s it i guess. kids and their partners all under the cut [hopefully lmao] because like everything i do it’s a lot of word vomit. have fun i guess lmao

uma

island -- milotic [schools of feebas are extremely common around the island, so when one ends up beached, they're usually sushi. except for the one uma just. decided to take care of. she kinda felt a kindred spirit in a pokemon who survived in the harshest environment and who most dismissed. so she treated him with all the care in the world -- which she'd never admit to outside of harry and gil. and he only evolved into milotic when uma was in trouble and no one else was around to help. it was a weird transition for uma, to go from having a little fish to a giant serpent, and one that loved to be super affectionate no matter who was watching, but she still loves him]

island -- zorua [found during one of her many late night walks about the island. he was disguised, of course, but uma could see right through it thanks to his tail. she informed the pokeman that he should be more careful with his illusions. so the little guy began to follow her around. rest is history. uma helps him with his illusions and lets him cuddle with her while they sleep]

auradon -- absol [so let's say the sea three get their chance to move to auradon without all the Struggle. uma travels a lot first because there's so much land to explore hot dang. this is where she learns of/meets an absol, and she tries her damnest to befriend her because uma knows what being an outcast is and being disliked based on stupid superstitions. and poor little absol is like... a human who doesn't immediately distrust me?? so it's no surprise that, despite being the newest to uma's group, it's super easy for their bond to give way to mega evolving]

harry

island -- misdreavus [found when they were both lurking in the night to frighten the same person. they sync up pretty well, mindset wise, and they just teamed up to be a terrifying force. she gets along well with uma's zorua, so of course harry was like yeah i'm keeping her around]

island -- gyarados [magikarp kinda just flopped into harry's lap one day, and harry, trying to imitate uma, keeps her around. sometimes he's impatient with her, but mostly he does a decent job in raising her, even if his own brand of temper gets passed on, which lets her evolve into gyarados when the sea three were threatened. it actually works out tho cause like. where gyarados likes to foster destructive tendencies, milotic fosters calmness. just another complement in harry and uma's relationship. mega evolving makes these two a force to be reckoned with]

auradon -- skarmory [when harry moves to auradon, he too travels a lot first, and in his travels he comes across a skarmory! armor bird just struck him as something super cool because sometimes harry is a dork. skarmory definitely thinks harry's a dork too, but he's like, well this human is kinda amusing so maybe? plus, he recognizes that harry grew up in harsh conditions too so harry is also covered in armor, mentally. plus plus, it amuses him that harry uses his fallen feathers as swords (he's kinda wary of gyarados because water=rust, but harry calms him down by making sure that doesn't happen]

gil

island -- gible [gil found her while searching for buried treasure. she was cold, and they huddled for warmth. he brought her back to the group and was like hey look what i found!! they play fight all the time, and when gible gets a little too clumsy, gil's there to steady her. the world better look out tho cause when these two get the ability to mega evolve it's gonna be some serious business]

island -- munchlax [look. i mainly just wanted gil to have a baby pokemon friend okay. but i mean, c'mon, munchlax is perfect for gil. he's hyperactive, eats pretty much anything and eats a lot, and like gible, likes to cuddle. right up gil's alley. the three of them could usually be found in a comfy dog pile]

auradon -- joltik [once gil moves to the mainland, he travels too, following uma and harry happily. and it's completely by random that he manages to find a joltik -- or rather, that joltik finds him. she just. falls and lands on his shoulder, and it's a good long while before anyone notices. gil is thrilled because she's so tiny and cute and sometimes gets static shocked when petting her isn't she great?? and she stays chilling on gil so she can feed off his static electricity. so basically all of gil's pokemon are chill and non-aggressive and he loves them]

jay

island -- sableye [found when searching for treasure; while at first panicked at being spotted by a human, she calmed down when jay made a deal with her that she can eat half of whatever they found together as long as he could keep the other half, so now they're partners. she's oddly affectionate when she isn't lurking and causing a bit of mischief, and her favorite spot is jay's shoulders -- she's always perched on or hanging off of them. she doesn't particularly like fighting, but she won't hesitate to get her claws out for jay]

island -- cubone [sableye actually found him while she was looking for gems/crystals, and jay just. kinda adopted him. won't admit it to anyone, but he kinda empathizes with cubone with the whole crying for a dead mom thing. only a little. don't tell anyone. but yeah, cubone, once he got used to her, will allow sableye to huddle with him on the colder nights on the island (or when they need to lay low from jafar so they won't get jay in trouble). no one admits it, but they've all become a little family, nonchalantly giving affection without ever really acknowledging it, which both jay and cubone are thankful for, as they can be a little proud sometimes]

auradon -- rufflet [this ball of aggressive fluff issued a challenge at jay when jay got too close. jay was so impressed by the little guy's spirit that he decided to try to add him to the group. plus, it's kinda rare for the island to have bird pokemon, so when jay sees one in the auradonian wild, he's kinda fascinated. by far the most willing to fight out of the pokemon jay's tried to befriend, it took some time for rufflet to realize that jay wanted to be friends. cubone didn't really care for him at first, and sableye just thought he was amusing. but they learn to read each other's behaviors and readjust their little family. when rufflet evolves, jay will have one heck of a powerful flying pokemon]

evie

island -- kirlia [evie found ralts in the so-called gardens of her mother's castle. the both of them were confused because what on earth would a ralts be doing anywhere near the evil queen?? well, it turns out that she was attracted to the way evie gave herself positive emotions to counteract the sinking feeling evil queen gave her. a human fighting to consciously give themselves positive emotions intrigued ralts, so she stayed by evie's side -- in secret cause evie didn't want evil queen to do anything. but being around evie actually helps them both, by bringing ralts out of her shell and by giving evie genuine happy/positive emotions. they won't have any trouble when it comes time for mega evolution]

island -- salandit [eq practically forced her to have a female salandit that the evil queen "procured" in order for evie to get some help in ensnaring a prince/man. cause you know. female salandit can produce a pheromone that can attract nearly anything. evie and salandit are wary of each other at first, and they don't particularly like each other much. but they sorta bond over the fact that evil queen is simply unbearable, always ranting that evie needs to get prettier and yelling at salandit to evolve into salazzle so she'd be more useful. so they slowly become something like friends, even if a little of resentment lingers now and then]

auradon -- chespin [evie found chespin while out looking for potion/science ingredients. he was a little curious about this colorful human digging in the dirt and he just. kinda followed her. and he decided it was love/best to stick around when evie fed him some of her food. he's a bit of a glutton after all. but he's optimistic and mostly carefree, and he loves being with evie and kirlia (he's a little wary of salandit but they get better everyday). and tho he likes to hoard his food, he'll definitely share with evie because he notices that she tends to not eat as much, either because she's so focused on work or because it's just been a habit since the island]

carlos

island -- metang, shiny [found as a beldum when carlos ventured toward the outskirts of the island for a breather: as a shiny, beldum was excluded from their herd, and something like that struck carlos as kinda kindred. plus, being carlos, he knows exactly how intelligent this pokemon and its evolutions are, so he actively trains them to grow stronger to evolve. training just for the sake of bettering themselves is kinda unheard of on the island, but metang really likes carlos and appreciates that carlos doesn't really judge their outside coloring. also, carlos can kinda relate to metang on the whole genderless thing. but yeah, they're always science-ing together]

island -- purrloin [so carlos didn't really choose purrlion so much as she chose him as her target and has been following him around ever since. cause, you know, when she usually gets caught stealing something from a human, they'd usually just grumble when she turned on the cute charm. carlos tho? he was just like hey can i have my stuff back thanks. so purrlion was super intrigued. and thus carlos had a slightly annoying, more than slightly sassy companion. beldum/metang are a little confused by her and carlos' relationship, but they're of the opinion that carlos should have lots of friends. carlos doesn't reeeeally mind her around because she steals her own food, and sometimes, which no one acknowledges, she'll even bring carlos and metang food as well]

auradon -- emolga [ngl i just like the idea that, while traveling and complaining about auradon forests,  an emolga just drops down on carlos, possibly static-shocking him a little. also, she steals his food, and because carlos has the best food, she doesn't leave him alone. so yet again carlos is stuck with a pokemon that just like. won't go away. purrloin is definitely wary, especially when emolga shocks her for shits and giggles. she also likes to rub against metang, getting that sweet sweet static clean to max power. carlos usually bribes her to stop doing this with all the best berries. metang just finds it funny, especially because, when it comes down to it, emolga and carlos get along really well, and sometimes he doesn't even notice that she has perched on his head/shoulders, making his hair stick out in all kinds of directions. none of carlos' peers tell him about tho because they think it's cute]

mal

island -- banette [mal is the only one who "befriends" a pokemon that has already evolved. so banette is super stubborn. but then again. so is mal. they actually have a good few things in common. she is a grudge personified, so pokemon professors say, and mal has grudges galore. they might as well work together, no? even so, they just circled around each other for the longest time, watching the other "work" and interact with others on the regular. each run in with each other lasted longer and longer until eventually they stopped separating. don't let their seemingly standoffish attitude toward each other fool you tho they're fiercely loyal to each other. mega evolving never looked so easy or so terrifying]

island -- dragalge [mal found him as a skrelp when she was netting for fish to sell, a practice she abandoned, especially since all it got her was an agitated poison spitter. she didn't throw him back in the water tho at least not at first. was mostly like okay listen if you agree not to spit poison at me i'll let you go back and maybe keep some people from trying to fish in your surroundings? and he was like i don't believe you but whatever it takes to put me back in the water. and then mal does. and then it's just. like. a wary trust. and banette was like hey i can scare people from this area and mal was just. that is an excellent idea. so skrelp was like nice okay maybe i definitely trust you. when he evolves into dragalge, he doesn't need help from mal and banette to scare anyone away from his territory, but he still likes being around them. he's the reason mal never needed to learn how to swim]

auradon -- fletchinder [mal comes across this friendly little fluff ball on a reluctant camping trip. she was attracted to the color of mal's hair and kinda fluttered about just inspecting. and then some other wild pokemon decided to pick a fight, and before mal could intervene, fletchling full on went apeshit while fighting. mal was impressed by her relentlessness that drove the other pokemon away, so mal allowed her to stay close. when they returned home, both banette and dragalge were like uhhhh okay?? but they didn't really mind either. evolving into fletchinder only made her more territorial but like. that's basically mal and her group's MO so it's fine. only now fletchinder has the firepower to back her threats up. mal won't admit she's proud of her newest pokemon]

ben

-- pidgeot [ben's oldest partner in that he befriended her as a pidgey before he was school-aged. it wasn't thought proper for a "prince" to have such a "common" pokemon by some (mostly his dear old dad) but ben wouldn't budge. they were basically inseparable, and she grew really protective of him really quickly. (she and adam never got along). it was extremely easy for pidgeot to mega evolve when the time came. plus, her mega form makes it like super duper to take ben to the skies]

-- rapidash, shiny [due to his snooty booty upbringing, ben was brought to the stables and tasked to choose one of the many ponyta to partner with in races and contests. so the loser picks the sole shiny to save her from being shunned by the herd. there was an attempt to persuade him to choose another, but ben already made up his mind. and so began ben's habit of sneaking into ponyta's stable just to spend time with her in order to foster trust. it didn't take long for ben to be able to touch her without getting burned, which was a good thing since she liked to nuzzle a lot. when she evolves into rapidash, she's a bit smaller than usual, but boy is she strong and fast. she's a blue ribbon all the way]

-- sylveon [ben was given an eevee as a gift when he and audrey started dating, kinda like a hint that hey maybe y'all should be engaged or something. but anyway, little eevee took to ben like a ducklett takes to water, and ben had a wonderful time introducing him to the rest of the group. he got along well with pidgeot and rapidash too so that's another body for the cuddle pile. whenever ben rides rapidash, eevee would ride on top pidgeot as she flies alongside them. due to the high affection between ben and eevee and the fact that eevee knew a fairy move, he became sylveon. which works because he's able to calm ben when royal duties become a bit too much]

-- bonsly [ben happened upon this little guy while traveling on king related duties. he had taken in too much moisture and was crying nonstop, so ben helped dry him out, caring for him and feeding him until the little guy was better. considering that bonsly's a baby pokemon, he kinda clung to ben for the rest of the trip, and when it was time to go home, ben asked if bonsly wanted to join him. and so bonsly became part of ben's group, with pidgeot acting like a mom to it and sylveon acting like a dad. in ben's favorite garden around the castle, bonsly has his own little sand garden to roll around in if he ever gets too damp]

-- phantump [the newest of the bunch, phantump hitched a ride on the limo that brought the islanders to the mainland, and she just. floated around until ben noticed her. tho she isn't a baby pokemon, she behaves like one, so she gets along well with bonsly, and sylveon and pidgeot basically decide to adopt her too. a lot of people who meet with ben on whatever issue needs to be discussed will usually find phantump curled up on ben's lap with her head in the crook of his arm]

audrey

-- lopunny [audrey's first pokemon, befriended when he was a buneary when audrey was a wee petite babby. a fast friendship formed, and they're super affectionate with each other as well as extremely loyal. after he evolved into lopunny, it was super easy for him to mega evolve due to their bond. and it works well because mega lopunny is just like audrey, shedding all the niceties and getting down to business, fight wise]

-- bellossom [she was actually aurora's, befriended as an oddish. after audrey was born, bellossom hung around and liked audrey so much that after a while aurora suggested they be partners. it took some but eventually everyone transitioned to the change]

-- espeon [same as ben, audrey was given an eevee --they were brothers-- as a gift (again, it was a hint that hey an official engagement would be nice). he was a little more cautious in personality, but lopunny and bellossom make him feel at home, and he and audrey grow super close. he loved joining the group in lounging out in the gardens, enjoying the sun. because of the high friendship he had with audrey, when he evolved during the day, he became an espeon. he's frighteningly loyal and scarily protective of audrey, but he's still a big ole softy at heart]

-- teddiursa [the newest pokemon of the group, audrey finds her dipping into the castle's honey reserves. after calming her down and promising no harm, audrey makes a deal with her: she can have all the honey she wants if she just comes and plays with espeon. teddiursa liked the company so much that she just. never left one day. so now she has a mama bear in the form of audrey]

jane

-- togetic [jane met him as a togepi via egg hatching. the egg was given to her by her mother, who was given it by someone else (fg just plain forgot; she can be scatterbrained sometimes). but jane dutifully took care of the egg, and was so happy when togepi hatched! they've been fast friends ever since, which is a good thing because sometimes jane needs a happiness boost, which togepi and now togetic is all too happy to provide]

-- mimikyu [it was totally by accident that jane ran into her, as jane likes to take long walks in the forest. so, really, she kinda tripped over mimikyu. but jane knows all about trying to fit in and being insecure about your looks, so they took to each other immediately, and with jane's help, she gets a bit more confident; tho she never takes off her disguise. mimikyu and togetic also get along swell]

-- swablu [jane's newest, he literally just landed on her head one day as she was out shopping in town. it was one of those moments where jane was like okay this might as well happen. so they stayed like that, and the rest is history. he fits in well with togetic and mimikyu, and he loves to help jane clean and tidy up. if/when wablu evolves into altaria, mega evolving won't be a problem]

[edream93]

Thoughts About D3

Possible spoilers for those who may have still not seen it.

Already got me tearing up with that dedication at the beginning for Cam.

“Good to Be Bad” has grown on me. Not the lyrics per se but the song in general.

Even though I know the Smee twins are going to Auradon I gasped when I thought they were going to split up the twins.

Not really a fan of Mal’s engagement dress but -shrug-

I used to weirdly like Queen Leah but blaming Audrey is a no-no.

That moment after Ben proposes and Mal is hugging Belle kind of makes me want to write a oneshot where Mal lowkey does cute things for/with Belle because she really wants a mom figure.

Aw! I love seeing more of the Isle villains like Lady Tremaine and Mr. Smee. I like how you can see that they do care to an extent for their kids. Is it healthy? Hard to tell but if they do, it makes the Core 4 life on the Isle look a bit dark if they feel like their parents never loved them like mentioned in D1.

Oh, “Queen of Mean” is kinda a bop. YAAAASSSSS AUDREY!!! I’m honestly kind of rooting for you!

Why is Belle asking Mal what to do like she hasn’t dealt with her own villain? 

Ben, didn’t you say in D2 that people on the Isle are your people too? If you’re protecting Auradon, you gotta protect them too.

Evie’s house is really cute.

Yes, Evie! Thank you for calling Mal out but also, you want to see your mom? Wasn’t that what you were afraid of in D2, seeing her?

Ugh, seeing Jay, Carlos, and Evie in her kitchen is giving me plot bunny ideas where they all live together (except Mal and Ben but they visit often and Doug would be somewhere, I guess...) and help Isle kids adjust and be like a little cute family.

“I love the lack of dirt” “And the lack of flies” Omg, these poor babies. 

Yeah Audrey you be dangerous baby!

OMG! I’m living for old hag Mal! XD “How bad is it?” Evie.exe has stopped working. 

Oh, there’s Dude. And oh, he can still talk. Guess that gummy was strong stuff.

Omg, I want Jane and Chad growing up together/sibling-type fics

Chad is a lot of things but I kind of love his loyalty to Audrey.

OMG, Audrey’s happy birthday song voice is kinda hot.

I like the idea that Dr. Facillier has a lot of side hustles like he’s the Headmaster of Dragon Prep, he owns a shop, and he has the arcade. In terms of the Isle, he’s pretty rich.

LOLZ the pirates stealing the bikes is hilarious. I miss my pirate boys. 

Wait, so Mal knows Hades is her dad? WTF?

So I don’t hate this Mal and Hades song but the style is kind of not what I expected they would choose for Hades.

I’m imagining the guy who Ben orders around after he hears about Audrey is Chip.

Gil: “You swam off and forgotten all about us” Aw! My poor baby boy!

Evie, I love you girl but did you really think the gum thing would work?

Harry has definitely had a few screws loosened since Uma has been gone.

YES!!! Uma is singing!!!

Need more Siren!Uma fics after that knight fight. Also coven! Uma, Evie, and Mal with witchling Celia (with maybe familiar Carlos because like he was also involved with that scene and it gave me ideas)

Gotta give it to Evie. She’s really trying to get these hot messes under control.

Gil loving grapes is too precious. Also, get this boy a penguin!

Celia concerned for the twins and Dizzy is too precious.

“Is she not a fast learner?” “She’s emotionally involved” LOLZ

“One Kiss” is such a weird song, not in terms of production but just because of character development. I guess it’s because it’s like the first time that Evie has ever seemed NOT confident.  Also, it’s Sofia Carson is super sexy in it and I love it. Also also, I don’t really ship Devie but there little moment after the song was too cute. 

I kind of like Ben with a beard.

“Thanks for saving me gorgeous face” XD

Jarlos...

Chad “I want my mommy” Charming

Can someone get these kids something better to eat other than birthday cake?

I kind of like Mal’s outfit when they bring Hades over. Especially the accessories. 

The red head next to Hades when Mal gives him the ember back is like “Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!” XD

OMG! Mal finally apologizes!!!! And Ben too!!!

I hope Jane gets a birthday party redo.

Ben’s “Hi Dad” to Hades was hilarious XD

Though I love that they brought down the barrier but my first thought was like “Cool cool cool but now the people who actually deserved to be free are free like and like wtf? Why do you want to meet Carlos’s mom, Jane?”

They seriously made me cry with that tribute to Cameron.

Overall thoughts:

What I Liked

The music itself was pretty good and I think that it delivered the very basics of what I wanted which was for Mal to apologize. I also always enjoy when we get to learn more about and see more of the Isle and those who live there.

Other random things I liked:

Gil and Jay bromance and traveling the world on jungle adventures and hopefully seeing a penguin somehow.

Uma having her “I told you so moments”

All of the outfits except for Mal’s engagement dress.

Mal turning into an old lady for a few minutes.

Gil and his love for grapes.

The idea of siren! Uma after the knight fight.

I seriously like Mitchell with a beard

What I Wish Was Different/Wish There Was More Of

More Beast Ben. 

If they’re going to push Doug/Evie then I really wish Doug had more lines and that their relationship was actually explored. Like I don’t hate Doug but like, I’m indifferent towards him. 

I wish China had her own song that actually used in the movie. I also wish we had more Thomas singing. 

More obvious Huma. Like, yeah there are several things that you could point to as “Huma” but honestly I feel like you had to really look hard at them. Like, it overall met my expectations but they were low to begin with. 

More character development for everyone who isn’t Mal.

I wish there was more Hades and Dr. Facilier. I feel like they built them up so much, especially Hades, and then they were underutilized. 

More Uma of course. 

Though I know it wouldn’t happen because it’s a DCOM movie, I wish they had leaned more into villain!Audrey. Like they could have definitely done more with her.

So yeah... Those are my thoughts! Overall, I enjoyed the movie and I look forward to seeing what the fandom, especially the Huma part, has in store for fanfiction. 

[kenshi-vakarian7]

OC Interview

I was tagged by @obvidalous .  Thank you.

I’ll tag @ripley95things and anyone who wants to do this.

I’ve done this already for the following;

Kira Ryder Adam Shepard Marc Shepard

1. What’s your name?  

Luke Nathan Skywalker Ryder

2. Do you know why you are named that?

I was named after Luke Skywalker.  No, seriously!  My Mom’s a huge Star Wars nerd and wanted to name me and my sister Luke and Leia once she found out she was pregnant with twins.  But my Dad, who’s never been fun at parties, put his foot down over the names.  They eventually compromised and name my sister Kira.  Kira’s glad she didn’t get the Leia name, but me personally?  I would’ve thought it was awesome.

3. Are you single or taken?

Taken. ^_^

4. Have any abilities or powers?

I’m not the world’s biggest tech geek or anything, but playing around with some tech and seeing how they work is pretty cool.  I even have a combat drone!  His name is Excelsior!  And yes, the exclamation mark is part of the name.

5. Stop being a Mary Sue.

*shakes fist* NEVER!

6. What’s your eye color?

Blue

7. How about your hair color?

Dark Brown

8. Have any family members?

Well, there’s my Dad, Alec, and my Mom, Ellen.  Mom used to make the best hot cocoa every Christmas.  Then there’s my twin sister, Kira.  She’s a bit more serious than I am, but she’s still my best friend anyway. :)

9. Oh? How about any pets?

Sparty and Sparty Jr. are awesome.  That’s my pyjak and hamster... though I’m not certain if he’s really called a hamster.  He looks like one, but... yeah.

10. That’s cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don’t like.

You mean besides Tann’s opinions on the krogan?  Well... there’s the Archon.  Fuck that guy.  I also hate getting up at the crack of dawn.

11. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

Have you ever tried Paintball or laser tag?  If not, it’s great!  I also like watching movies, camping, rocking climbing, dancing, and waxing poetry with Addison.  That last one is definitely fun. >:)

12. Have you hurt anyone in any way before?

Only when I’m forced to. =\

13. Ever… killed anyone before?

*sigh* Yes, but that’s only because they don’t give me a choice.

14. What kind of animal are you?

Well I did want to be a crow, but Gil claimed that already.

15. Name your worst habits?

People say I don’t take things seriously.  I guess that’s true in some cases.  People also say I joke at the worst times, especially in a life-or-death situation.  Hell yeah I do!  I’d rather die laughing than screaming.

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?

Definitely Vetra since, you know, she’s taller than me. ^_^  Nah, I’m kidding, I know what you meant.

I’d say my Mom.  She was always kinda, compassionate, and always supportive of my sister and I no matter what we set out to do.  I miss her...

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual?

 Straight.

18. Do you go to school?

Not since high school.  I was considering going back before I was told about Andromeda.  The idea of going on adventures in a new galaxy appealed to me more.

19. Ever want to marry and have any kids one day?

Sure, I’d like that.

20. Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?

I’m sure they’re out there somewhere.  I just hope they don’t turn out like that one Sloane fangirl I met at Tartarus that one time...

21. What are you most afraid of?

 Me?  Afraid?  Nah, nothing scares me!

...Okay, actually, I hate the idea of dying alone.

22. What do you usually wear?

Anything comfy... preferably my pajamas, but society considers that inappropriate for everyday wear.  So I have my jeans, t-shirt, and leather jacket to wear.  That’s a favorite of mine.

23. What one food tempts you?

Oranges.  Always oranges.  If I ever get my own place, I want to grow an orange tree in my backyard.

24. Am I annoying you?

Well, if I’m being honest, the questions are a little... unusual.

25. Well, it’s still not over!

-Looks at his watch- Sigh...

26. What class are you (low/middle/high)?

I’m totally high class.  Top hat, monocle, all the perks that come with that kind of society.

...Actually, that’s all in my head, I’m actually middle class.  But a guy can dream.

27. How many friends do you have?

If we’re only talking about the ones here in Andromeda, it’s definitely more than I can count on my fingers and toes.  I’ve met some really great people

28. What are your thoughts on pie?

Why, do you have pie?  ...What do you mean you don’t have pie?!  Don’t mention pie unless you have some to share!  Now I’m sad...

29. Favorite drink?

I like my coffee and whiskey... sometimes at the same time... but I would never turn down a big glass of orange juice, especially with a big breakfast.

30. What’s your favorite place?

Here in Andromeda?  Definitely Meridian.  It’s an amazing planet that made the search and fight worthwhile.  I plan to settle there once I retire as Pathfinder.

31. Are you interested in anyone?

I am, and she is the most awesome turian in two galaxies. ^_^

32. That was a stupid question…

Uhhh...

33. Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean?

A lake that’s not filled with sulfur... or ice... or boiling hot temperatures...

34. What’s your type?

AB... Oh, you mean THAT type!  Well, definitely someone who likes to laugh.  I’d hate to make a poor soul feel tortured at my attempts to make her laugh.

35. Any fetishes?

Uhh... do I have to talk about it?  Because I prefer not to talk about it.  Not that I have anything to hide, but... yeeeeah.

36. Camping indoors or outdoors?

Outdoors.  Which reminds me, I need to go... outside, so... later!

*quickly leaves the interview*

[thesilverdragoon]

Little Ladies’ Day

“I’LL KILL HIM- LET GO-”

“FOR BLOODY SAKE SOMEONE GRAB HOLD OF THAT SHRIEKIN’ DEVIL-”

And grab hold of the miqo’te, they did. Well… the bravest roegadyn they had anyway.

“SHE’S A LUNATIC, I’M NOT FIGHTING THAT- IT WOULDN’T EVEN BE A FAIR RIGHT!!” Some young punk had the wind knocked out of his sails.

Ul’dah’s arena was always lively, but this was a bit much. The host of this particular venue (or event or whichever it was)made a noise of annoyance or disapproval or both, and then stomped over towards the hurricane of claws. “Get a hold of yourself yeah?!? Ya see what ya bloody do? I’m tryin’ ta run a business here and all YOU’RE doin’ is scarin’ away all the competition, and if there’s none of THAT,” He grabbed the back of her shirt roughly from the guard and jostled her around. “Then there ain’t any GIL comin’ in!! Yer runnin’ me damned DRY!!”

“Then get me someone who can FIGHT who’s not such a CRY BABY AND WE’LL-” Cat hissed.

“I’ll not be bargaining with the likes of a devil. Much less you!!! Now you go cool off or else yer goin’ ta take that stub of yers an’ shove th’rest of it up yer arse!!”

They tossed her back out into the street with that final word.

Cat sprang to her feet and puffed up, ready to start screaming at the door, but she thought better of it at the end.

Instead she grabbed a nearby empty crate off a whole stack of them and threw it into the street before storming off, back to the main walkway of the city.

Cool off… how dare they. It wasn’t her fault they could hardly find anyone brave enough to face her AND her wrath.

Despite it being later in the evening, many people were out and about. The city was still lively. Not like Ul’dah ever slept anyway.

There were blossom trees that had been brought in big pots up and down the street, ribbons tied everywhere, colorful confetti and flowers all over the place too. Everything she hated. Except the flowers. Maybe.

The sights made her bitter if anything. Fathers out with daughters, husbands with wives, siblings with one another, all having what looked to be a good time.

Many of the girls had flower crowns made of daisies, in all sorts of colors. And they were fragrant too. It smelled like flowers all over the place. Cat wrinkled her nose.

Why did she even walk in this direction? It only made her more upset than she already was, though for entirely different reasons.

So she stomped on past, looking for a side street to occupy. And when she found one, she sat down and fell back against one of the stone walls, closing her eyes, brows furrowed angrily.

She could still hear the crowds. But that was as good as it was going to get.

Then her stomach rumbled.

And no coin meant no food. Or a place to stay. Or anything.

Everything, well, nearly everything Lowrey said would happen, did. She could hardly keep a job, the law was on her ass constantly with all of the brawling, and she was usually a slave to whatever work she could find. Like now. But even they were at their wits end. She didn’t have any skills, any talents. Nothing. Only fighting.

And screaming.

She’d have rather died than telling that idiot he was right.

Besides… it wasn’t like she hadn’t lived this way before. She could do it.

Then why was it such a pain?

Hesitantly, she got up again and meandered towards the market place. At least she could steal something to eat, if they weren’t making any holiday snacks for free already.

Food stalls lined the bazaar, cooking away as usual. Cat easily slipped back into the crowds, eventually eyeballing a really busy kabob stand. Perfect.

She pushed her way to the front and waited. Everything looked so tasty… and orange. But it looked like it would be hard to reach from where she was.

Cat frowned. Maybe it wasn’t worth it.

She turned and immediately crashed face first into a whole lot of blue. “OW-” It didn’t hurt, but that was what came out. Followed by a strangled hiss.

When she looked up, her ears flattened. “You-”

“Sorry, you should be more careful on where you are-”

“YOU’RE THE SON OF A BITCH WITH THE BIKE!!!” Cat shrieked angrily. If it wasn’t for that damned thing Lowrey wouldn’t have taken it-

“Excuse me??” The elezen looked down at her before realizing. “Wait- I know you-”

“LIKE HELL YA DO-” Before Cat could fly directly towards his face, the knight picked her up by the back of her shirt and held her up like a helpless kitten.

“I had wondered where you had gotten off to after the whole incident back there by the Ruby Sea. Your companion said you came back to Eorzea.”

“LET GO OF ME-”

Some of the locals nearby recognized the yelling, and even saw it from afar. And they said nothing.

Anyone who could render Cat useless was good in their books.

“Stop shouting. I would like to hear what you have been up to. Not here, though.” Vesevont glanced around before making his way out of the crowd by the food stands and heading towards the nearest city gate.

They left Ul’dah behind, stepping out into the dry lands with nothing but the crickets and other things that lived out there.

Only then did he put Cat down. They sat on the edge of a crumbling wall nearby, looking out over the craggy hills.

Cat kept her arms crossed defensively. “This is so fucking stupid. This is all YOUR fault this happened. If it hadn’t been for your dumbass bike then we wouldn’t have BEEN IN that MESS.”

Ves hardly reacted. Being verbally abused like this was comforting in a twisted way. It reminded him of Mischa. If anything, he missed it. “Your friend, loathe as I am to call him as such, stole the device from me. And the trouble that came with it. I did not set the Garleans on you.”

“I DON’T CARE!! I LOST MY STUPID TAIL CUZ OF YOU IF YOU AIN’T NOTICED YET!!” Cat sprang up again, clenching her fists tightly.

Ves looked down at them, and then up at her. “I’m sorry.” He had nothing to be sorry for and he knew it.

But saying so thankfully defused the miqo’te’s growing temper, for the time being. Instead, she looked away and threw her arms in the air momentarily before letting them drop in defeat.

Neither of them spoke for several minutes, until Cat decided to sit back down once more.

“....Guess none of it fucking matters now anyway. I don’t work for that ungrateful fuck anymore. Or that lousy cheat.”

“I heard.” Ves answered.

“Yeah? What ELSE did you hear?” She snapped.

“Nothing beyond that.” The knight scratched at his face idly. “I had just found it odd, or maybe surprising to hear at the time was all.”

“Hmph.”

The silence came again.

“This holiday they’re having in the city is interesting. I’ve never seen one like it before.”

Cat glanced over at the elezen again. “What?? Oh. I dunno. Little Ladies’ Day or something. It’s so dumb.”

“I think it’s quite lovely actually.”

“Lovely. You think it’s ‘lovely’???” Here was this scarred up Ishgardian dragon slayer calling the holiday ‘lovely.’ It didn’t make any sense to her, and she laughed in disbelief at that. “Ok well I guess if you got a girlfriend or a wife or a kid then fine, I guess.”

Ves sighed. “I do not. No. Only a son.”

“Well there, see? Good for you.”

“I don’t think he would be interested in many of the things I’ve come across in my travels around Eorzea.” There was a note of defeat in there somewhere.

Cat’s ear twitched. “Well… kinda hard to like old-people things. They’re pretty boring.”

Ves made no facial reaction in particular. “If we all liked the same things, that WOULD be boring. Yes. Though.. I would not say I am terribly exciting. You are correct.”

The miqo’te gave a smug grin of satisfaction. “Yup.”

“Regardless,” Ves leaned back, looking up to the night sky. “If you were not happy there, then better that you left. There’s no point in staying in a place that doesn’t make you happy. ..Provided you have no one counting on you to stay.”

Cat frowned. “...I guess.”

The elezen nodded, before standing again. “So, have you had anything to eat? We can go back, now that you’ve calmed down.”

Cat’s stomach grumbled on cue, and her face flushed red. “Shut up.” She growled.

Ves shrugged, and turned back to head into the city. And Cat, not wanting to be alone, reluctantly followed.

They went back to the marketplace, and he offered to buy her something to eat. Anything she wanted. And she most certainly pointed out some of the more expensive snacks in an attempt to get him to snap at her and tell her that it cost too much money.

But he didn’t. And she got everything she wanted.

If anything, it confused her. And made her angrier, but it fizzled out once they had finished eating and gone back to the main plaza in Ul’dah. There were still a considerable amount of people out, though, it was clear that they would start turning in for the evening soon.

A few lalafell stood nearby handing out flower crowns to anyone who wanted one. “We’re not leaving until we’re out of supplies! Which will be very soon! Come get one!!” Ves’ ear twitched, as did Cat’s (and at about the same time no less.) He looked down at her, and she quickly looked elsewhere, again, giving the most sour expression she possibly could. “Would you like one??” “HUH?? NO FLOWER CROWNS ARE FOR BIG BABIES!”

Ves pursed his lips with a half lidded gaze. He didn’t buy it. “Wait here.” “What??? NO! No that’s so EMBARRASSING! STOP IT! NOO!!-” Cat shrieked and went after him, but there was little she could do.

“I’ll take one.” “Of course sir! Lucky you, this one is second to the last! But no lesser than the others! And who is your lucky maiden tonight?-” “STOP-” “There she is.” “Ah, I see.” Cat crashed into the elezen again as he turned around, almost knocking herself completely to the ground. “I don’t WANT it, put it BACK! Give it to someone ELSE! People will laugh at me if they saw me wearing something like that!!-” “What, this??” Ves held up the flower crown and looked down at her, clueless look and all. “Why? I’m sure it would look very pretty on you.” “W-Well it WON’T!! And I’m NOT little so it wouldn’t even WORK-” She was growing more and more flustered by the minute.

“With all due respect miss, the crowns are for any maiden! Both large and small! And you seem very lucky to have a seneschal of your own here this day!- EEP-” The lalafell chimed in before hiding behind his other companion as Cat hissed in their direction.

Ves sighed. “Close your eyes.” “I swear if you put that thing anywhere NEAR ME-” “Just do it.” “I MEAN IT I’LL KILL YOU-” “No you won’t.”

Despite being so monotone about it, there was something behind it. An immense amount of power or authority, or something else- something to be feared maybe. Or...or maybe it was just a very dad-ish flavor. Cat had no idea what it was, but she hated it. Reluctantly, she closed her eyes, teeth bared and ears flat.

“I mean it.” She snarled. There was a slight weight on her head and the smell of daisies then. Damn it. Damn it all. She kept her eyes shut and could feel her lip quivering already, face about as hot as a bed of coals.

“All right. You can open your eyes now.” When she did, she couldn’t see anything. Everything was blurry and full of globby tears and a tonz of upset.

Ves seemed unperturbed by the crying. Not in a bad way though. “I told you. You look lovely.”

“Shut up,” Cat sniffed, sounding all stuffed up.

“I will. I was just about to be on my way. I was not sure what I would find here in Ul’dah, but I didn’t mind accidentally becoming your seneschal for the evening. Even if you did.” The miqo’te wiped at her eyes furiously. She suddenly felt sad that he was going to leave. But her pride be damned if she said anything now. So she didn’t. “Yeah well…” She still refused to look at him.

Ves understood though. He’d been through this song and dance before. And he smiled gently. “Likewise thank you for being my young maiden for the night.” It sounded a little awkward but Cat knew what he meant. He even stood at attention and offered a very formal and graceful bow.

“Ok ok… Just...fine, whatever…”

Ves knew there was a thank you in there somewhere. Like Mischa, it was probably physically killing her to say it. But he wasn’t cruel.

With one more nod, they parted ways. Or rather, the knight did. Cat stayed standing where she was for a while longer before meandering off towards an alleyway. The sky overhead looked dark and gloomy. The clouds had rolled in, and it started sprinkling.

Once she found a place to sit, she took off the crown and turned it over a few times, trying very hard not to cry again. Instead, she just buried her face into her knees as she hugged them tight, feeling very, very lonely.

[hitchell-mope]

Ben: what opinion would you like first?

Uma: surprise me

Ben: Harry’s terrifying. And he kinda reminds me of a root vegetable.

Vision!mal: potato. Possibly

Ben: potato! That’s the one. Sorrythatwasuncalledfor

Vision!gil: HAHAHA. WHEW. Man that’s funny. And a exceptionally accurate description.

Uma (trying and failing to fight off a smile): that. That’s neither here nor there. You’re being honest yes? Cause I hate being lied too.

Ben: I don’t lie when my life depends on it.

Uma: good. Now. Any other opinions?

Ben: gils a really sweet boy. And I think he’d thrive in auradon. All he needs is positive reinforcement. Actually that’s what all of you need.

Uma: and me? Be brutal.

Ben: you. Seem to be a good leader. But you need to let things go. I’m doing my damnedest to get more children away from the isle like I told you. And I get it. You’re angry. But this plan to hold me ransom won’t work. I know Mal. You do too. And I wish she would’ve told me she was struggling but I understand why she didn’t. But she’ll come and get me. I know she will.

Uma: she’ll turn on you just like that. Just as she did to me.

Ben: and? Yeah she dumped a bucket of shrimp on you but didn’t you push her in the water first.

Uma: what I did was a prank. What she did was cruel.

Ben: she couldn’t swim. You know that right? I’m guessing you did. So you dunked your supposed friend in the drink and got mad when she retaliated? That’s fair(!)

Uma: uuuuuuh

Gil: hahahaha!!!! I LOVE THIS GUY

Mal: shhhhh. Let them finish

Gil: he can’t hear me she can’t hear you. I think we’re safe

Uma: whatever I don’t care.

Ben: would you like me to say anything else?

Uma: no but you’ll listen. She doesn’t care about the kids here

Gil: you don’t either

Uma (ignoring gil): in six months has she ever told you what it’s like here on the isle. The lack of food. The disease. The knowledge that someone you know might disappear and never be seen again? The thieves murderers and criminals that lay in wait for the ones that don’t pay attention?

Ben: to be honest. No. She hasn’t. None of them have. And frankly. I don’t blame them. Can I ask you something now?

Uma (gritting her teeth): go on...

Ben: are you honestly able to tell me that if you and your crew came to auradon first you would tell me about the children that haven’t been invited yet. That you wouldn’t get caught up in having proper beds and food. Finally being safe. That you wouldn’t forget about who and what you left behind... Can you honestly tell me that?

Uma looks like she’s been punched in the face

Gil: by the way. Your answers no in case you’re wandering. Oh and if you’ll allow me.

He jumps on the desk and starts doing the “I told you so” routine from scrubs

Ben: They didn’t tell me because they probably don’t like to think about it. And I didn’t ask because I know it’s an uncomfortable subject for them (Sees Uma and vision Mal staring at the desk) and what’s happening now?

Mal: her ones doing the “I told you so” dance he’s actually rather good at it. But he scares me so...

Gil: 🎶I told you so I told you so I I I told you so I to...🎶

A horribly loud scream can be heard in the distance

Ben: what...was...that

Uma: I have no idea.

Gil (chuckling deviously): 🎶ohhhh but I do🎶 (to Mal)come along dear. Our “leader” needs our help.

Vision!gil and vision!mal leave

Ben: she’s gone.

Uma: so is he. (Realises she’s still holding bens aorta) here you go.

She throws it to him. He catches

Ben: soooo I... just put it back where it was.

Uma: basically yeah

Somewhere else

Mal: ok I’ll bite. What’s happening

Gil: Lonnie

Mal: care to elaborate?

Gil: she’s fading because her one has rejected her magic.

Mal: I know that.

Gil: well. Little miss Carrie White has also rejected her magic. Right this second actually.

Mal: (shock dawning on her face) Mal...

Gil: uh yep.

Mal: oh no ben!

Gil: cool your jets. He’s there. Oh benny boy!

Vision!ben (looking rather pale): what!

Gil: I believe it’s my turn to lead this little group.

Ben: so what. Yah gonna kill me or.

Gil: why the hell would I do that. Her rejection will do that for me. I just wanna humiliate you. Listen up guys

(Big bad cat starts up)

[atopearth]

Shall we Date? Lost Alice Part 16 - Gilbert Rance Route

Hmm Gilbert looks interesting with his wings lol. The heroine is so chill even though Gilbert carried her off and is flying in the sky with her. He’s literally kidnapping her lol. But I guess it wouldn’t be nice if she flapped around and he dropped her😥😥 Hmm, so Gilbert’s role is the Griffon, but what does that mean? Kinda surprised Gil thinks it’s shocking that the heroine doesn’t like being referred to as a certain role and that she could tell he doesn’t like the concept of the Spinner of Tales allocating roles to everyone in this world, I mean, who actually likes that they’ve been allocated a certain role without their consent?

Anyway, seeing them enjoy tea time with Luke was sweet~~ Too bad, it was ruined and Owen is trying to get the heroine back from Gil. Really liking the extra detail they put into the spell effects, so pretty when the guys are fighting with magic, love Owen’s chess pieces! Gotta admit that it is kinda cute when Gil gets emotional and his wings pop out lol, he’s such an open book haha. I like Darius’ look, not sure about his personality but he looks pretty☺️ Omg, so Allen is the ‘Another Alice’, he was kidnapped by the Spinner of Tales from the real world and was made a stand-in for Alice until he could find someone suitable for the role of Alice. He was kidnapped as a kid so even though he’s from the real world like our heroine, he’s probably never had the chance to experience it, which is so terrible… He’s even been called a fake etc as well, that’s tormenting…

Lmao at Gil saying Darius’ personality was twisted (since they were talking about how Allen’s circumstances have warped his personality to be what it is) as well, so Darius tries to get the maid to change all Gil’s food into green peas since he doesn’t like them, they’re so childish and cute lmao. Wow, so when the Spinner of Tales found the heroine and tried to get rid of Allen, he actually retaliated and was able to steal half of the Spinner of Tales’ powers? And now he’s outside Wonderland trying to gather others of a like mind that disagree with Wonderland’s rules and wants to change them together. Allen looks super cool btw, I like him😊 I guess since he’s got half of the Spinner of Tales’ powers, he can restore her memories, and the reason she came to Wonderland this time around was because she’s been having this recurring dream since she was a child, and apparently she can save these children that are constantly asking for her help in these dreams by becoming Alice? Hmm. It was pretty rude of Allen to give her memories back without asking whether she wanted to yet, and thus causing her to faint, can’t blame Gil for being so mad at him for causing that. Seeing Gil’s relief when she woke up was so nice though haha.

Hmmm so there’s a Book of Wonderland where the Spinner of Tales records everything about Wonderland, so by getting it and changing things, they can obliterate the rules of Wonderland..🤔 Ooh yeah, their kiss in the sky was kinda cute btw lol. Don’t really feel the romance this route either but it’s cool, especially since their date around town was sweet with them being teased haha. I thought it was a bit suspicious/dodgy with the way Allen picked Gil up when he was living the standard Wonderland life fulfilling his role day by day, like not saying Allen telling him to question his role is bad, but it seemed more like he did it to gather an army rather than for their benefit. I’m not surprised that Allen hates Wonderland, but does he hate the heroine since she’s the real Alice? I mean, his previous life was stolen when he was forced to become Another Alice, and then because the heroine voluntarily decided to come here and be Alice, his place was taken away again, it may not be a role/place he wanted, but he lost everything because of it, so if even that is taken, then what was the whole point of him being in Wonderland then? It makes me think, maybe, he does hate the heroine as much as he hates Wonderland…

Although I feel like Gil is a side character that doesn’t have much presence or personality to the story, I do find the idea of Another Alice quite interesting, and seeing Allen burn the Book of Wonderland hoping to destroy Wonderland is nice. Not nice nice but it’s cool to see another “villain” instead of the Spinner of Tales all the time haha. And his motives are understandable too, Wonderland is the reason why he lost everything and was forced to live a life of a fake for others and then be discarded. His hatred is normal, so yeah, I’m most interested in Allen lmao. Well, I guess the Spinner of Tales kinda used the last bit of his powers to return Wonderland to a blank book to get the heroine to decide how it should be now? And of course, since Gil took her for a ride in the sky before, that would of course be her vision of freedom and for Wonderland to write its own story as it should, instead of being restricted to roles and rules.

The ending was really cute, especially since it’s so funny how when Gil gets excited, his wings come out hahaha. Overall, Gil wasn’t a bad guy, maybe a bit bland though, so his personality wasn’t as appealing against Allen and the story. So, he’s nice but not very interesting, cute but not very different from the other cuter guys haha, basically another average route imo.

[spam-monster]

Descendants 2 thoughts

- Was not expecting a commentary on social stratification and gang culture being the only outlet for kids from poor neighborhoods who think they have no other means of escape and the importance of making sure kids from lower class families have access to a good education but that’s what I got.

 - I know all you Jaylos shippers are probably writing fanfic where Jane is the Evil Bitch Who Doesn’t Deserve Him because that’s what always happens when a girl gets in the way of the gay ship, but have you all considered fanfic where Jane is Carlos’ Awkward Wingman Who Is As Clueless About Dating As He Is and they get into crazy shenanigans together while she’s trying to help Carlos win Jay’s heart?

- (I personally thought Jane/Carlos was kind of cute, mostly because they are both the awkward fluffy dorkbabies of their respective groups, but I will admit it was not established very well.)

- Evie and Doug are still cute and also are going to take over the world together with the power of fashion and accounting.

- Mal and Ben are still hella cute and I love that he sees her transform into a giant scary dragon and does not give a shit.

- And his parents seem to adore her and are super offended when it looks like he ditched her which is also very cute.

- (Speaking of parents was Maleficent-lizard literally in Mal’s backpack that whole time?)

- Also it is interesting how Mal and Evie get the dramatic duet complete with montage. And by interesting I mean gay. Seriously if you showed that to someone out of context they would totally think it was a love song. Which I am not complaining about btw and I expect that song to be used in many yuri amv’s from now on.

 -  That part when Carlos made everyone sit and talk because he and Jay were worried about Mal too and wanted to be in the conversation. More things showing boys and girls having strong platonic friendships/family dynamics please yes good.

- I do think it’s weird Audrey wasn’t in the movie after playing such a big part in the Wicked World shorts. I guess the actress wasn’t available?

- ...I have a theory that she was on the boat somewhere at the end and only pretended to be stranded in Sherwood forest over the phone to keep Chad away from it because she didn’t want to deal with him.

- I also kind of want to ship Chad and Gil just because they’re both one-dimensional stereotypical dumb blond jerks who only exist to be the butt of jokes apparently.

- Except Harry kissed Gil in the book maybe? Or something?

- Harry is totally bi and flirts with everyone though have u seen him?

- Also totally in love with Uma. In that it’d-be-cute-if-they-weren’t-so-evil-but-it’s-still-really-cute kinda way.

- Uma has a least a fraction of a crush on Ben, but to be honest he is very easy to crush on i mean he’s so earnest and fluffy and wanting to help everyone.

- And that part when dragon!Mal and Tentacle!Uma were fighting and Ben just roars and jumps overboard and it’s like “aw he’s not so different from them and now he’s gonna kick butt!” but then he just talks everyone down again because he’s a freaking sweetie honestly.

- I was expecting some kind of comment from him along the lines of “Mal it was really hard for me to fit in on the isle, now I know how hard it must be for you in Auradon trying to act like us all the time” but oh well.

- But apparently Mal’s actress and Harry’s actor are dating and there are vague rumors that might affect stuff? To which I say to them, if y’all really want to kiss on screen that bad have Harry and Ben switch bodies in the next movie or do a totally different Disney channel movie together, don’t mess up established in-universe relationships for irl stuff.

- I don’t really believe those rumors anyway but just in case i guess.

- anyway Ben/Mal and Harry/Uma otp.

- Jay’s still pretty single which is cool, I like that he and Lonnie are just at the “mutual friends with great respect for each other” stage

- (JAY TELL HER SHE FIGHTS GOOD)

- Lonnie was kind of shoehorned in but okay yeah badass girl swordfights were pretty badass and Jay getting around the rules by making her coach was also nice, if an overdone trope.

- Uma’s hair is awesome.

- Dizzy was adorable and way too pure for the island.

- would have liked to see some of the Wicked World characters like Jordan and Ally in there properly but oh well.

- headcanon: Uma and Freddie are sisters or half-sisters or something. 

- in conclusion: all of these songs have been stuck in my head for a week make it stop.