#Geraldus x reader

[freaky-deaky-cookies]

Can I request headcanons for Dark Urge, Geraldus, Wyll, Halsin, Gale, and Astarion reacting to shy GN s/o who always asks for permission even just to hold hands or a kiss on the cheek please?

Dark Urge, Geraldus, Wyll, Halsin, Gale, and Astarion (Sep) reacting to shy Tav who always asks for permission even just to hold hands or a kiss on the cheek

Dark Urge (redeeming)

Towards the beginning of the relationship they do not really understand why Tav asks for permission

Would initially think that Tav is afraid they would hurt them

For the Dark Urge their whole life was to take anything and everything they wanted

As time goes on and Dark Urge starts to learn from / heal from their past trauma they find Tav asking for permission to be extremely sweet and understanding

Dark Urge has never truly got to experience someone who truly loves them for who they are 

Tav’s requests for permission and their shyness would be a constant reminder that love and affection don’t have to come from a place of control or dominance

“Thank you Tav, you have shown me more love and understanding than any other soul that exists.”

Geraldus

Not sure how Tav and Geraldus even got themselves in a relationship

Geraldus, himself is on the shy side

However, when he is not blushing and mumbling out his own request for affection, his mind is fired listening to Tav ask for it

Geraldus would never say no to Tav

To him Tav is higher than the Gods, they are perfection

“Why would you ask me such a thing dear… I cannot get enough of you”

“Do you think I would ever turn down a kiss from you?”

Wyll

Total sweetheart about it

Wyll finds this to be among the most endearing things about his Tav

At heart Wyll is a true, traditional romantic, and what is more than romantic than the love of their life looking at you and asking for your love and affection

Wyll is another one to hardly ever deny Tav’s request

“You never have to ask, my dear. But I understand that you want to feel comfortable—let me know how I can make this easier for you.”

Halsin (!Halsin Backstory Spoilers!)

Halsin’s eyes are so full of love anytime he hears Tavs sweet voice ask for him

While is was long ago, Halsin appreciate Tav asking permission before they jump him with kisses and cuddles

From time to time Halsin gets in his head about that time he was used as a pleasure servant

As wild as Halsin is, he is still a mortal with a mortal mind

If Tav hesitated, he’d hold out his hand gently or give Tav a soft kiss on the forehead

“My heart, you are true perfection”

Gale

EATS THIS UP

Gale wants to be wanted, especially by Tav

Gale, who is intelligent and often a bit formal in his mannerisms, would understand Tav’s need for permission but wants nothing more than to hold Tav

He believes in the power of trust and would reassure Tav that there’s nothing to fear from him

“Ah, my dear, I appreciate your thoughtfulness, but there’s no need for permission in matters of the heart.” (Sush Gale we all know you want them to keep asking because you love it so much)

Astarion

Astarion would be the most conflicted in terms of his reaction. On one hand, he would deeply appreciate that Tav’s respect boundaries and asks for permission, as he is someone who has a very sensitive relationship with consent. 

However, because of his own traumatic past, his reaction might come across as more self-deprecating or sarcastic at first.

He’d try to tease Tav about it, making light of the situation with his usual charm and wit, but underneath his sarcasm, there’s a genuine desire to make you feel comfortable. 

He would be keen to show you that he’d never force anything on you and might even go out of his way to be overly considerate, so you know that you are always in control of the situation.

“You don’t need to ask, darling... but I suppose I do enjoy the thought of you wanting to be sure.”

[al9ayf]

Could I request headcanons for Cal, and Geraldus finding out their f!s/o has suicidal thoughts please?

it was a little hard to do this one but i tried my best. also im so sorry for taking so long to do this request i could not think of anything!!!! but im lowkey so proud of this one.

ᥫ᭡ suicidal thoughts | cal, geraldus

｡˚ explicit content :: thoughts of suicide ofc

ʚ cal:

you and cal have been childhood friends and ended up dating each other. lia and rolan helped set the two of you up on a date after relentlessly teasing the both of you for months

everything was perfect. life was great. you and cal had a healthy relationship. you never once argued unless it was over something small or as a joke. you even thought about the idea of marriage and how amazing it would be to raise children in elturel

then the fall came, and your life drastically changed. you managed to escape with the three siblings, but in the process had to say your final goodbyes to your parents, not knowing if you would ever see them again. you were shaken and torn from the incident, but cal helped you through it. he was the most peaceful tiefling a person could know

still, his wise words and calming presence could not shake you back to reality. it was traumatizing to live through the fall, and at times you found yourself snapping at cal, only to profusely apologize to him at night with kisses. he accepts your apology every time, and it angers you how he could still be so forgiving

at the druid’s grove, rolan asked for days and days to leave for baldur’s gate. you agreed with him, and argued with cal about it. he tried to be peaceful about it while you and roman argued with lia. he tried to be the mediator. he was always the one in this group to keep tensions low but it was not working. finally, when the group of adventurers managed to convince you and rolan to stay did the arguments come to an end. and again, you apologized to cal who admitted to you that it hurt him how you were being so cruel. you were not the only one to lose everything during the fall of elturel

on the road to baldur’s gate, you were ambushed by the cultists. you tried to protect cal but you took a slash to the back of your knee. rolan saved most of the group, but could not fend off the cultists for long. he picked you up and ran, while you screamed for cal

while rolan drank himself away at the bar in last light inn, you rotted away in a bed with bandages on your knee. you were advised not to walk for a little while since the cuts were deep. but you could not care. cal and lia were gone. the love of your life was gone. how could such an amazing person’s life be taken away just like that? what you would do to hear his sweet voice one more time

rolan comes to you at night and sits at the edge of your bed. he is drunk and rambling. he yells and kicks, but you lay on your side and stare at the wall while crying silent tears. he fills it in your head that they are both dead. that you will have no children. that you will never know a smile again in your life. he does that every night and then passes out on the floor beside you to make sure you do not die as well. but rolan does not know how you wish to die

finally, when you are able to walk again, you go outside to relish in the cold air. your eyes are dry and your lips are cracked. you refuse to eat and drink little water. cal is gone. most of your friends are gone. rolan will die by drinking himself away and there is no possible way to leave the shadowlands alive. you wish to see cal one more time

each step you take towards the darkness is a step to cal. his sweet words of comfort is all you wish to hear. you are blinded by false images of him beckoning you outside of the globe of light protecting the inn. yet before you can even exit, you feel somebody stopping you. it is rolan, and he yells at you. you tell him you wish to die. that no life is worth living after what has happened to all of you

“have you no wish to see your sister and brother again?! their bodies gone, but their souls live! if i can give up life to see cal again, i will give it up a thousand times over. don’t you want to see them, rolan? don’t you?”

he does not reply. he gets mad and runs back inside the inn back to the bar. you rush after him, only to stop when you see the adventurers with a group of tieflings and gnomes. you hear familiar voices and see a pair of familiar horns

cal comes rushing to you, embracing you and kissing you. you are too stunned to speak or move. you do not return his kisses. he is alive. and just as you were about to give up yours, he has returned to you in the flesh. you cry into his arms and fall to the floor with him

cal knows that you are happy to see him again, and he expects prayers and praises but all you tell him is how you had almost killed yourself to see him again. you thought him dead, and yet here he was. cal breaks at your words

he starts to cry too, and hugs you tightly. he curses himself for getting kidnapped and for not being able to protect you. but at least he has come back just in time to save you. he cried with you, and promises that with the help of the adventurers, the both of you will live a promising life in baldur’s gate

ʚ geraldus:

you and geraldus met before you two became harper’s. it was love at first sight. for years you have dated now, and geraldus was hoping to propose after the cult of the absolute would be defeated. the both of you were strong, and with jaheira and her companions by your side, the possibilities of a victory against the cult was high

while in baldur’s gate, jaheira ordered to find the rashemaar. it took days before you could even find a lead, but within those days geraldus started to get on your nerves. he was supposed to lead this group to prove his worth as a harper. but he has done no such thing. you see the fear in those eyes. and there is nothing you hate more than fear

you argued with him about it. he needed to get it together or everything would go to shit. if he were to hesitate for even a moment, he would get killed. geraldus stuttered while trying to promise you that such a thing wouldn’t happen, yet it only angered you more. you did not sleep with him that night. instead, your last words to him before you left to sleep at an inn was “you are too weak to be a harper. maybe it is best you return home, geraldus.”

the next morning you returned to the camp to the sight of a bloodbath. the bhaalists had come and taken everybody, and you were the only one left. you hurled at the sight of the bhaal symbol painted with blood of what you immediately assumed to be geraldus’. he was taken and killed. you threw up some more and cried

you are a harper. you must remain strong. but the death of your beloved hung in the air, and the stench of iron overwhelmed you. you felt like shit. you had told him to basically fuck off and left him all alone. you could have protected him. you could have died with him. but you left. this was your fault

you cried and cried, but then left to find jaheira in the city. your heart has been shattered. but you promised yourself one thing. once you help jaheira, you will reunite with geraldus wherever he may be. his laughter rings in your ears, and even the sight of a man with black hair tricks your mind into thinking it is him. though it is not. you will never see him again for as long as you live, and that thought shatters your broken heart into even more pieces

after meeting jaheira at entharl's shop, you alerted her to what has happened, and almost broke down in tears if it wasn’t for her contradicting you. she said that she had received a letter recently from geraldus to meet here and speak about the rashemaar, and you tell her that is not possible. it must be a doppelgänger. she says you shall find out right now

after coming face to face with “geraldus” and the group of harper’s you were with, you quickly were enraged. his eyes were teary and worrisome at the sight of you

“you hide underneath your cloaks and wear the skin of people we love! have you not once felt the touch of the sun or the kiss of a loved one?! do you not remember what it feels like to be loved?! do you despise me so that you wear the skin of my partner?!”

“geraldus” stumbles over his words and tries to clam you down. he does not know what to say to convince you to believe that it is him and that he has lived. but you are already crying and shaking your head. you yell at him and say that you shall meet with the real geraldus soon after you kill them all. that you have thought about a hundred different ways how you will end your life and these bhaalists. they will not take you

yet when he speaks the words “may selûne’s tears shine on this meeting” only then do you know it is the real him

after killing the doppelgänger’s and reuniting with geraldus, he is the first to cry. he admitted that he hesitated when the group came to kill the harper’s, and that he was glad you were not there to witness it. he cannot blame you for thinking that he had died, for he would have done the same thing. a life without you is a life not worth living. he has envisioned a life with children with you. you are the only one that he wants, the only one that he needs. and he would rather die if a bhaalist took that away from him

you kiss and hug him, all while jaheira begs the both of you to rest

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

Please write a part 2 for my Geraldus request 😍 Only if you don't mind of course! Thanks!

Once again, in a shocking turn of events I cannot sleep. Please enjoy what I've just written, although I do apologise if there are any spelling mistakes, I've written this at 2am in the notes section on my phone. Also 18+, contains smut 😬

The night waned in for a few more hours, you drank and made yourself merry amongst many of your friends, this was a night of celebration after all. In the corner of the tavern Geraldus would drink and talk with a small company of people, his eyes would flit towards you often, wanting to make sure you were okay, and keeping in mind the unspoken offer that you had with him, his mind racing at the fact you even wanted him.

As the night began to die down and people began to leave the tavern you once again bumped into Geraldus, there was not not many of you left in the establishment so it was inevitable you would wind up next to him once again. The alcohol stirring in your system made you merry, a soft rosy glow adorned your cheeks as you smiled at him, happy from the night you had spent with your friends, exchanging stories and laughter. As you stood next to Geraldus your hand found it's way to his arm, gently squeezing it as you spoke to him, silently in awe of the muscles underneath the armour, you were shocked that this tall skinny looking man had even the tiniest shred of muscle.

"So Geraldus, have you had a nice night?" Your voice was soft and your question was genuine, after all he had been through in these last few weeks, watching his own comrades be slaughtered and then help defeat the Netherbrain with you, a good and happy night is what he deserved.

"Urm, yes.. yes it has been a wonderful night." His smile was nervous and shaky as he spoke to you, a blush threatened to spread on his cheeks as he looked down to see your hand on his arm. "And you, my lady?.... You looked to have had a wonderful night"

A soft smile and slight blush broke across your cheeks, you chuckled and avoided eye contact, not wanting to show that him calling you 'my Lady' had such an effect on you in this moment.

"Yes Geraldus, it has been a lovely night, in fact I was wondering if you would like to join me upstairs for a glass of wine?" You tried to make your voice sound sultry, yet it did not come out as so, your voice cracked and showed your nervous demeanour, revealing your true feelings about this exchange, you liked the Harper and could not keep your emotions fully in check around him.

The question threw Geraldus off, you had implied earlier you wanted more, that was why he stayed, yet it still shocked him nontheless when you asked him to join you in your room. "Oh... Urm... I-i think that would be lovely" Geraldus coughed and cleared his throat, stuttering as he finally answered you, he wanted to join you, whether the wine or not was real or just an excuse to get away he did not care.

His nervous reply was so endearing to you, your smile was genuine and you wanted to kiss him right there. You placed your empty glass down and with your now free hand you grabbed one of his, chuckling softly at the blush that spread across his face from your touch alone. A gentle tug was all that was needed to get him to follow you, leading the way up the stairs in the tavern to the grandiose room you were staying in. Being the new hero of Baldur's Gate had it's perks and one of them was this stunning room that you were now staying in, an en suite with a beautiful feather bed was bliss to you after your months sleeping on the hard floor on the road.

You both entered the room and Geraldus closed the door quietly behind you, watching you as you released his hand and wandered around the room, stretching your arms above your head as you made your way over to a carafe of wine. The moonlight streamed through the windows, catching your skin as you walked through it's glow, making you look even more enchanting in his mind, the way the iridescent glow of the moon bounced off your skin was enrapturing to him, his eyes transfixed on you as you poured two glasses of wine.

With the two glasses of wine in hand you looked towards a stunned Geraldus, smiling once again at his reaction to you, his big wet eyes were transfixed on you and you could not help but find it so endearing, you nodded your head towards the small balcony adjoining your room, you wanted to have a drink under the moonlight with him. It took a second for Geraldus to compose himself before he came forth the join you, taking the glass of wine from you with a shaky smile.

You both stood under the soft glow of the moonlight, leaning against the iron bars of the balcony that overlooked the streets below.

"Thank you for joining me Geraldus" you turned to him and smiled, taking a drink of wine to steel your own nervous thoughts, you had fought monsters and Netherbrains but for some reason being this close to Geraldus alone was making you nervous. You moved your gaze back to the open streets below, watching the city bustle away even at this hour.

Geraldus leant beside you against the balcony, your shoulders barely touching as he took a gulp of wine for courage. "Thank you for inviting me, my lady" his voice was soft and sincere, making you blush at the name 'my Lady' the way he spoke those words was with reverence, making you feel warm inside, the fact he was stood so close to you did not help as your blood rushed to your face.

Moments pass in blissful silence as you drink your wine and enjoy each others company, watching the world pass by below. It was not long before you both finished your glasses of wine, the drink only adding to your buzz from the drinks you had had downstairs previously. You placed both of your glasses on a nearby table before taking your position against Geraldus at the balcony once again, this time leaning your head on his shoulder and sighing contentedly. This action shocked Geraldus, but spurred on but the alcohol in his veins he took his chance and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you tightly against him, kissing the top of your head gently as he did so.

Being enveloped in his arms and his soft kiss elicited a soft sigh from you, you had always been a fierce woman but now this usually shy man had you sighing and going weak in his arms. Wanting to take back your control you spun around in his grasp, your back now against the railing, your body pressed against his in front of you. Words were not exchanged between the two of you, just a look of longing from his beautiful brown doe eyes was enough to make you melt as he stared down at you.

Your hands cupped his face and pulled it down towards your own, kissing him passionately. Geraldus' hands fumbled slightly, shocked at this current gesture, it only took a few moments until his hands found their way onto your hips, squeezing your soft delicate skin as he tried to ground himself, making sure that this was real and taking the opportunity to explore your body. The kiss was passionate on both parts, once Geraldus had accustomed himself to the situation it did not take him long to adjust, pressing himself against you as he kissed you desperately. You moaned softly as you felt him on you, holding you against the balcony edge, your hands moving from his face to feeling the hard edges of his body, he was not a largely built man but you could feel the leam muscles of his body under his clothes.

The kiss lasted a few minutes before you broke it, your intention to move this towards the soft feather bed. As you broke the kiss you heard a soft whimper from Geraldus, clearly not ready to have the intimacy broken just yet. You chuckled softly and placed your hands on his chest, pushing him backwards through the balcony doors until you reached the edge of the bed, making him sit down on it. As he sat before you on the bed, his eyes wet with longing, you removed your dress, baring your body to him for a few seconds as you mounted his lap. Your lips found his own once again and now you felt his long slender fingers tracing the skin on your back making you shiver against him.

Geraldus' hands were on you and were hungrily travelling over your skin, wanting to take in all of it and commit it to memory. The kiss went on passionately, your hands eventually found the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head quickly, making sure not to break the kiss for too long. His chest was now bare against yours, you pressed yourself against him, wanting to feel his bare skin. As you pressed against him his body fell backwards into the bed, you now laying on top of him, straddling his waist.

As you were mounting him you could feel his excitement, his surprisingly long length was straining against his pants and digging into your thigh, the mere feel of it was enough to make you moan and grind against it, wordlessly asking for permission to touch him. Geraldus whimpered as he felt you grind against him, his hands now gripping your thighs for dear life, begging you to give him relief, begging you to touch him.

Your lips left his and found your way to his neck, kissing softly as your hands travelled down his body until you reached his pants. There your hands trembled as you unlaced them, tugging them down slightly, feeling his erect self spring forth. You stroked him gently, kissing his neck softly you could feel the moans vibrating in his throat, he was desperate for you.

A few teasing strokes was all you could manage, you wanted him just as much as he was craving you. You lifted yourself up slightly and began to position him before you, gently swiping his tip along your slick wet folds, an action that caused you to moan as well. You slowly lowered yourself onto him, shocked as his girth stretched you, relishing the feeling of it. You could feel his hands grip the top of your thighs, squeezing tightly as your walls stretched around him.

Once you had fully taken him you began to move, a gentle motion back and forth to begin with, you wanted to savour the feeling, trying hard not to be motivated by the pleasure that was begining to pool inside of you. As you rocked your hips back and forth Geraldus sat up and stroked his hands up to your hips. His lips found yours and began to kiss you hungrily, his hands found your hips, gripping tightly as he helped you move and forced you to pick up speed on top of him, the slow tease wss too much for him now and he wanted you desperately.

Moaning against his lips you obliged his request, kissing back hungrily you rocked your body back and forth harder and faster, giving into your own selfish desire for pleasure. Your hands found their way into his soft hair, gripping tightly and pulling on it, you broke the kiss and began to start leaving open mouthed sloppy kisses on his neck, you wanted to hear the noises he was making for you, to hear his whimpers and moans. It was not long until you could feel your climax approaching, it was begining to well up inside of you, threatening to spill over. As your walls clenched tightly around him your orgasm spilled through, a wave of pleasure errupting over your body causing you to stop moving and press your body against his, shuddering on top of him, sighs of your pleasure rushing into Geraldus' ear. His own climax happened at the same time, his body was on the precipice already but to feel your walls clenched around him was too much, his body shivered as your walls pulsed around him and he gave in, spilling inside of you.

You both laid back on the bed, breathless and sweaty, your lips were grazing softly against his neck, leaving soft kisses on his skin, praising him as he panted, quietly trying to catch his breath. It was not long until you both made yourselves comfortable on the feather bed, Garaldus wrapped his arms around you as you nestled into him, sleep would not be far off but you wanted to embrace the current bliss between the two of you for now.

[bxttxrflybxddie]

Dating Geraldus

A/n: Don't look at me like that. I tried working on requests but he's infiltrated my mind, running around day and night!!!! He's a cutie and I love him lol, might do spiced headcannons later who knows. I could probably write some more but these are the many thoughts that have been rummaging through my head.

Requested: no lol

Pairing: Harper (Soon-to-be Watcher) Geraldus x gn!Reader

Word Count: 1.7+k

Warnings: Lots of fluff, brief mentions of marriage and having children, brief food mentions as well, existential dread related to trauma and heavy disassociation towards the end. Reader = Tav, Tav = Reader

You accompany him to his ceremony where he’s named a Watcher! He offers an arm to escort you like a gentleman, and you not-so-secretly get a feel of the upper strength he’s been keeping private. You practically hang off of his elbow the entire evening and he wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Him being fiercely protective of you. Not crossing your boundaries, but keeping an eye open for any signs of danger when you’re around. He knows more than well that you’re capable of taking down enemies on your own but he wants to be someone you can lean on; someone you can look to being your shield against the evils of the world. It’s more than Geraldus wanting to be useful but more of him wanting to keep you safe and protected.

A plethora of nicknames for you. There’s the familiar use of “love” and “dear” with an occasional “my” before the term, but every now and then he calls you his “moonbeam” since you guide his way through the dark. 

You receive plenty of letters when he’s sent away for work. Long and detailed confessions of how he misses your warmth and how he can’t wait to return by your side. He writes dreamy imaginations of how you both would spend time at the current location he’s stuck in. Geraldus even tries his hand at poetry, each line about you.

Send him letters back! He has a growing collection of each note you’ve sent him, the majority are kept close to his nightstand but your most recent ones stay in his pockets while on duty. He likes to reread them in his spare time; memorizing each curve of every stroke of ink in your handwriting. He will also memorize specific phrases or terms of endearment you’ve written.

Meeting his mom! She instantly loves you for what you mean to her son, but makes an effort to get to know you personally as well. She adores when you lend a helping hand around the farm or assist her in making desserts! Geraldus is usually standing still; struck with Cupid’s arrow as he watches you and his mother get along. His heart melts in the beautiful domestic bliss of the moment!

Geraldus makes a daily effort to tell you how much you mean to him, one way or another. He tends to accidentally repeat sentences he’s already said to remind you that the words will always remain truthful. He also likes figuring out which vocabulary can make you shy, with a darted gaze and heated cheeks. He thinks it’s cute when you’re nervous given your reputation as the grand savior of Baldur’s Gate.

Being with you has him realize how much of a touchy cuddlebug he is deep down. Holding your hand, resting his head on your head/shoulder, and keeping a hold around your waist or bicep quickly become some of his favorite activities. Adores to hold you from behind when you are both standing and likes to be held against your chest when laying down in bed. It’s as if he can finally breathe; decompress and embrace the safety of purely you. He doesn’t mean to, but he does smell you when your bodies are intertwined. Your scent is very soothing to him. Very grabby in his sleep as well, he subconsciously wants to keep you close no matter when.

He’s so nervous under your stare; he can’t help feeling flustered. You’re looking at him, every detail about himself is completely bare and out in the open for you to judge. Along with a soft expression filled with adornment from you is, more likely than not, aimed at his direction. It doesn’t help that you can read him like a book. Further in your relationship he grows more confident and sure of himself. 

You can find him tripping over his words early in your relationship, particularly in moments where he’s trying to impress you. A few words of reassurance helps him immensely. 

He loves feeling your fingers between his raven locks. You usually brush his hair in the morning and at night, sometimes giving his scalp a comforting scratch. This is the quickest way to have him asleep in your lap. He snores slightly but is easy to wake if it’s time to get up. 

Geraldus frequently has nightmares. Not only from the incident where you both met but also from the other horrors he’s seen during his work as a Watcher. He despises waking you up in the middle of the night since he hates being bothersome. However, he’ll still selfishly indulge in your comfort after nudging you to consciousness if he can’t handle his fears himself. Pull him close, his pointed ear against the thump of your heartbeat is precisely what he needs as both consolement and a lullaby. 

Every time he thinks of his future, he pictures you. He wants to be yours for the rest of his life and is definitely considering proposing after a couple years of being your significant other. If you have previously expressed wanting children someday, Geraldus could spend hours imagining how amazing parents the two of you would be. It’s almost as if he’s conjuring them into reality with how much he’s thinking. Maybe your daughter will have your nose, maybe your son will have his hair…

His kisses leave you feeling special. He first kisses you with only lip, shaking slightly as he feels blessed by the Gods themselves to have this opportunity with both hands on each side of your face. As the kiss progresses he’ll clumsily add some tongue, but leave you to take control. He likes it when you do. 

With leaving some room for imagination, he really enjoys following your orders. He appreciates a kind tone when telling him to do something more than barking out instructions, but he’s a good boy and will do what’s needed nonetheless. He also appreciates rewards for his good behavior.

His laugh is so loud now that he’s found it again, largely in thanks to you.

Geraldus will always catch you if you were to throw yourself at him, maybe not lift you off the ground but certainly collide his toned body with yours. He might stumble depending on the day and sometimes he’ll even fall over but he'll use his figure to soften the blow. Hold him against yourself nevertheless! Squeeze him tightly when he walks through the door after not seeing him for a while because of his duties! It makes him feel treasured and wanted. 

The Watcher isn’t necessarily a bad cook, but simple is a better word to describe his meals. He has primarily made food for only himself after leaving his mother’s care, but was mainly helping with the side dishes in his youth instead of the main course. Since you’ve lightened his life, he tries to improve as a chef! From experimenting dishes to asking his mother about certain recipes, he’ll be trying his best to make a “Marry Me” meal that’ll make you proud! 

Since Geraldus is gone for duty every now and then, he likes to return with special dates planned. It’s one of the many ways he likes to thank you for your patience and for choosing to stay by his side. Sometimes the dates are fancy, but more often than not they’re inexpensive and personal. Involving your favorites across multiple categories and sweet moments the two of you have previously shared. 

On dates in general, he tends to keep quiet and let you do the talking. He loves to hear about your dreams, aspirations, thoughts, opinions, and how your day went. Listening to how a scenario played out, even if he was there/involved, from your point of view is a joy to him. Yes, you’ll have to be the “He asked for no pickles!” in this relationship but it’s worth it and more. However, if you ask him a question he’s sure to respond. If it’s about a particular topic he may rant a tangent and then promptly apologize. Ask him about his work, he has so much gossip stored that's ready to be shared.

Geraldus does have thoughts about how lucky he is to be yours, and how it almost doesn’t feel real to him. Sometimes, he wonders if he met his end all the way back on that horrible night, and your time together has only been a vision. Or, maybe it’s what was in store for him after his life all along. He also speculates if he's currently going through his passing, and instead of flashing through the memories of his life he’s instead creating new and beautiful ones with you by his side and being named a Watcher. You’ll have to regularly ground him and bring himself back from the deceiving space his trauma has created in his mind. You’re here, He’s here, you two are here together, all of his memories are real, and you are both alive in this very moment. Learning a few breathing practices and taking the time to inhale and exhale with him is something he couldn’t live without. 

On the other side of that coin, he also has moments - very brief moments - where he wonders if you’re a doppelganger. That the real you, who he never had a chance with to begin with, is gone and in your place is this face-stealing creature that has seen him at his realest, weakest, and most vulnerable self. He is quick to brush those thoughts away. If you were a doppelganger, then surely, you would’ve ended him already; you’ve had every chance to do so. On his worst days, he thinks of the latter that wraps around into his “Is this even real?” moments. Ground and breathe with him still, but giving him some extra support through therapy will be beneficial for him for years to come. He still needs a good cry on occasions, hold him close and rub his back while he gets everything off of his chest and starts the day anew. 

He’s all yours; every fiber of his being is under your mercy and you continue to prove that you sweetly care for him. For that, he loves you. He loves you with the gentle thrum of his heart, with every moment shared between you two, with each arrow he aims, and with all of the years that pass. 

© BXTTXRFLYBXDDIE

[el-tur-el]

(Last updated 3/14/24)

Want to request something? Please read my request guidelines here!

Oneshots:

Rolan: It's the waiting, love, it's the wanting (Explicit) Penumbra (Mature) manibus adhuc mollior. (Explicit) Dammon: i will wine and dine you in the hollows. (Explicit)

Ikaron: ceilings, plaster. (Explicit)

Harper Geraldus: like a heathen clung to the homily. (Explicit)

Multi-Chapter Fics:

Girl Against God (Rolan/F!Tav, Explicit)

Headcanons:

Rolan comforting Tav after a nightmare Dammon with a partner who is a craftsperson

[lolliputian]

Chapters: 5/5 Fandom: Baldur's Gate (Video Games) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Rolan/Tav (Baldur's Gate), Geraldus/Tav (Baldur's Gate), Tav/Zevlor (Baldur's Gate), Astarion/Wyll (Baldur's Gate), Astarion & Tav (Baldur's Gate) Characters: Rolan (Baldur's Gate), Geraldus (Baldur's Gate), Zevlor (Baldur's Gate), Wyll (Baldur's Gate), Astarion (Baldur's Gate), Tav (Baldur's Gate) Additional Tags: Female Tav (Baldur's Gate), Unnamed Tav (Baldur's Gate), Psychological Horror, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Character Death, Alternate Universe, Reader-Insert, POV Second Person, POV First Person, Inspired by Doki Doki Literature Club! Summary:

Tav is the girl that everyone wants. Naturally. Everyone loves Tav. And they'll have her, of course...in a manner of speaking.

--

I tried something different today...

[underdark-dreams]

BG3 Masterlist

Rolan x f!Tav (she/her)

In Amber - [Pining - Angst | Explicit] - AO3

In Corpore Sano - [Hurt/Comfort] - AO3

Life, Death, Resurrection - [Injury - Angst] - AO3

Good Night For Company [ch1] [ch2] - [Fluff - Feelings Realization | Explicit [ch2] ] - AO3

Blades and Spells - [First Meeting - Fluff - Siblings] - AO3

Master - [Obedience - Praise Kink | Explicit] - AO3

More - [Romantic Fluff - Mild Angst - Proposals] - AO3

Starlight - [Slow Dance - Mutual Pining] - AO3

A Strand to Climb [ch1] [ch2] [ch3] [ch4] [ch5] [ch6] - [Angst - Pining - Established Relationship] - AO3 [Complete]

Birds and Bees - [ch1] [ch2] - [Tiefling Ruts - Sexual Tension | Explicit] - AO3

Rolan x Ember (OC by catsharky)

Pent Up - [Trapped in Closet - Tails - Touch Starved | Explicit] - AO3

Dammon x Karlach

Touchable - [Explicit] - AO3

Harper Geraldus x afab!OC

Wet Behind the Ears - [Size Kink - Face Sitting | Explicit] - AO3

Headcanons

Rolan x Dammon [sfw / nsfw]

Dammon x Rolan x gn!Tav pt. 1 [sfw / nsfw]

Dammon x Rolan x gn!Tav pt. 2 [sfw / nsfw]

Dammon x Rolan x gn!Tav at the Grove party

Tav finding Dammon's banned smut stash

Rolan / Dammon as new dads

Misc. for Rolan and Dammon [sfw]

Dammon x m!Tav

Dammon, Rolan, & Zevlor - cooking

Rolan, Dammon, Zevlor - Tails [pining / relationship]

Rolan x top/dom m!Reader [nsfw]

Rolan, Dammon, & Zevlor - borrowing their clothes [nsfw]

[rolansrighthorn]

Songfic Tag Game!

Pick a song to accompany each of your fics or as many as you like. This might be the fic's inspiration or just pure vibes that you'd like to share with readers. Tag as many people as fics you feature (or do as you please).

I have been on a Mitski kick so all of these are going to be Mitski songs lmao.

Apologies Aren't Enough (Rugan x Rue (OC) x Geraldus):

I Will- Mitski

I will take good care of you I will take good care of you Everything you feel is good If you would only let you I will wash your hair at night And dry it off with care I will see your body bare And still I will live here

Only Together, With You (Rolan x Daryna (OC)):

Come Into The Water- Mitski

I didn't know I had a dream I didn't know until I saw you So would you tell me if you want me? 'Cause I can't movie until you show me

Tender For You (Geraldus x Willow (OC)) (unpublished as of posting this):

First Love/Late Spring- Mitski So please hurry leave me, I can't breathe Please don't say you love me 胸がはち切れそうで (My heart feels like it's going to burst)

Another Chance At Love (Rolan x Penelope (OC)):

Once More To See You- Mitski If you would let me give you pinky promises kisses Then I wouldn't have to scream your name Atop of every roof in the city of my heart If I could see you Once more to see you

Tagged by @dustdeepsea

Tagging @underdark-dreams @thisaccountisagainstmywill @voloslobotomyservice and anyone else who wants to do it!

[neontokyoo]

How many characters can we request for headcanons? Would you do the same prompt with different characters? Can we request for gender neutral reader? Are there any characters you won't do in each fandom? Can we request Baldur's Gate 3 Geraldus, Cal, Haarlep, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor? Can we request characters from different fandoms in a request? Are there any dark topics you won't do like rape, suicide, etc? Do you do poly ships x reader? Would you mind if we request for Alternate Universes or Aus like AU where the character lives happily? Would you mind if the request is suggestive, implied sex, or mentioned sex but no explicit sex? For Baldur's Gate 3 requests, would you mind if we don't specify the race/class to leave it ambiguous or if we ask specify the race/class like human/healer? What kinks would you accept for requests? Can anons request smut? Can we check with you if you received our requests? Thank you in advance!

You can request as many characters as you want for headcanons, but it may take longer for me to post them if there’s a lot of characters to write for.

would love to do the same prompts for different characters.

I do write for gender neutral readers, unless I’m writing smut or someone specifically requested a female reader.

I write for literally everyone for the fandoms I write for. Except for maybe Cazador because if characters are problematic, I prefer not to write for them.

You can request anyone you want except for Cazador.

I don’t do crossovers so I won’t write for different characters from different fandoms in one post.

I won’t write about dark topics such as rape/non-con, suicide, etc., but I can mention them depending on the request.

don’t do poly ships just because I find it hard to write about more than 2 people being in a relationship.

I really don’t mind writing for AUs. If you have an AU you’d like me to write, don’t hesitate to send it to me.

I will write suggestive content, but you would have to specify that in the request, or I would probably end up writing smut.

Race/class doesn’t matter unless the request specifically asks for a certain race/class.

I accept most kinks as long as they’re harmless. I won’t write about weapon or food-play or anything like that.

Anons can request anything they want, including smut.

yes, you can check in to see if I got your request! Some requests I won’t do if I don’t want to, and I’ll let you know. But sometimes my inbox glitches and requests don’t always show up, so feel free to check in with me!

I hope this helps, and I will make sure to add these to my rules because these were really amazing questions! Thank you for asking!

[el-tur-el]

like a heathen clung to the homily.

Pairing: Harper Geraldus x F!Tav

Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content. 18+, Minors DNI.

Word Count: 1,102. Read it on AO3.

Little bit of a schedule swap - Rolan piece should be up on Sunday. Have this in the meantime, the brain bees said 'must write sad wet cat man'. (This is not the fic I have planned that involves edging, that will be coming later.)

Warmth. Patchouli and some kind of flower that she doesn’t know the name of, essential oils pooling in little slicks on the surface of the water. She sees herself in them, iridescent and raw, constantly changing shape. Home can be whatever you make it; she learned that during her time fighting the Illithid threat, when it came in the form of purple robes, of quietly murmured prayers. Of the flash of a silver sword, the peek of fangs from between pouty lips. The most elegant horns she had ever seen. The smell of peat moss and petrichor. Brimstone and something sweet.

It looks a little different now. A solid torso, a wiry frame; his back pressed against her stomach, his head tilted against her shoulder. His eyes are closed, and she can’t help but think that it was all worth it. For this. Just this. To be able to hold him, to be able to contort herself into the shape of his home.

She loves him, she loves him, she loves him.

She presses her lips to the crown of his head, and he smiles, slow and lazy. Sweet in that sort of way that makes her heart seize up behind her sternum. He deserves the world - she only wishes a human being could be capable of offering up something of that magnitude. She would move mountains. She would write sonnets. She’d kiss every freckle, trace the constellations mapped out on his skin, document them all to memory.

What a beautiful, fragile thing a heart is. What a privilege to be able to cradle one in your hands.

“I love you.” She murmurs against the soft black of his hair, slick with sweat and water and oils that were far, far too expensive. Indulgence breeds complacency, but he’s worth it. “Can I take care of you, sweetheart?”

“Yes.” He rasps, all wet-eyed wonder, thick and tempting, pools of honey.

Her palm splays out flat between his pectorals, soapy and damp, and she drags it down the dip and curve of his stomach, his flanks. Past his navel and southward, to somewhere warmer. Yielding. Her fingers loosely wrap around his cock, and she swears she will take him apart piece by piece with the reverence he deserves.

He lets out a shuddering breath, tilting his head to press his lips against the soft column of her throat. Such a pretty thing, soft and pliable against her. Malleable like clay, something to shape with her hands, make and unmake. She moves, slow, and he whines against her skin. She could bottle that sound. Drink it down every night. Headier than wine. Sweeter than mead.

“So good for me.” She breathes out, praise and prayer all in one. “Just like that, sweetheart. Look at you.”

His hips shift against her grip, the water in the tub sloshing with the movement. She’ll have to wipe up the floors later, but she cares little; another act of tenderness, another reminder of a love that she never once thought she’d be blessed with.

“Tav.”

“I’ve got you, lovely.” She moves at an achingly slow pace. There’s no rush anymore. Not now, not here, in this space she’s made for him. In the yawning canyon of tenderness that she’s so carefully crafted. A house of worship. A church, an altar, a prayer. Communion.

He’s always been a restless thing, and this time is no different; squirming against her, pushing up into her hand. Needy. Wanton. Debauched. She studies his face, the furrow of his brow, the bow of his lips. Memorizes it, pockets it for later. Savors every little detail, every whine, every moan.

“Does that feel good, Geraldus?” Something about this man, this bright and beautiful and brilliant man, has put her in a state of perpetual motion. The movement of her lips wrapping around every syllable, the innate need to be touching him at all times. Frenetic and frenzied in her need to prove devotion.

“Y-Yes, Tav, Gods.” His voice cracks, trembles. A low heat pools in her stomach. “I want - I -”

“Anything.” She whispers, and she means it.

“I want you, please.”

And really, truly, who is she to say no to that.

She’s silently grateful that she splurged on the ornate tub for their home, nearly the size of a pool; one of the few things she’d allowed herself to be selfish about. He gently disentangles himself from her grasp, turning over so he’s facing her, his cheeks flushed a delicate shade of pink. He presses his lips to hers like it’s the first time. Does this every time. Still so soft and unsure of himself, even now.

Her hands come to his shoulder blades, and she sighs into the tentative press of his mouth as he pushes into her. She feels weightless, here, underneath him, the heat of the water around them. He traces a fingertip between the valley of her breasts, down to her hip bone. Exploratory. Cartography. Venturing landscapes made of flesh and breath. Two fingers slowly press against her clit as he ruts into her - shallow, languid.

It is not heat and fire and fury. It is home.

“I love you.” He sighs, his forehead pressing against hers.

Even now, with him settled against her, she is sick with yearning. It’s cloying and syrupy and saccharine, the way she loves him. Her friends regularly rib her about it. But she doesn’t care.

Happy. For the first time in a very, very long time.

His breathing grows ragged, his noises a little breathier, a little higher. Her muscles tense, anticipation thrumming under the surface of paper-thin skin, bursting at the seams. To watch him unspool like embroidery thread, to hold the weight of him against her as he falls apart.

“I’ve got you.” She breathes out again. “Let go for me, sweet thing.”

He shakes against her, a thin, high whimper spilling past his lips. His fingers press against her clit a little more firmly, still so eager to please even as he dissolves into little more than broken sounds before her. She keens, heat rushing through her veins, spilling forth. Her head tilts back and her eyes flutter shut, caught between the here and not, weightless.

They settle against one another, arms wrapping around skin spattered with rivulets of water, his face tucked into the crook of her neck.

Would that she were a church, so that she may bless and keep him always.

The silk swallows her up that evening. The thought haunts her, rattles about her mind.

Milk and honey. A crown of thistle and thorn. Royalty. Deity. Lover.

[el-tur-el]

I have eight million things I want to work on and very little time these days 😭.

[el-tur-el]

Somethin filthy with Harper Geraldus?

Decided to do something a little different for this once since I have a few bigger projects I've done/am doing with Geraldus!

Harper Geraldus NSFW Alphabet

NSFW UNDER CUT. MINORS DNI.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

This man clings. He has to be touching his partner constantly, and this is even more intense after intimacy. Lots of cuddling, lots of his face buried in his partner's neck. If they need cleaned up at all, he would insist on a bath together. Overall just a very sweet little thing.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I think that Geraldus holds a certain amount of pride for his hands; he's a Harper, he uses them to save people. To expertly wield a bow. To heal, to help. I think that's significant to him.

As for his partner, I don't think Geraldus falls into the camp of lusting over typically sexually-charged features. I think his favorite thing would probably be his partner's eyes - the intensity of a gaze, the way they soften around the edges when they look at him, the way so much possibility is held within such a small thing.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

If you were expecting this man to be adventurous in this camp, I'm sorry to say he is not. He's something of a traditionalist; if his partner isn't on some form of contraceptive, he's using condoms. If they are, he'll finish inside. He isn't fond of finishing on his partner - he thinks the whole thing is a little degrading, honestly.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Is it really a secret if it's kind of obvious just from looking at him? This man is a massive sub, and on the rare occasion that he does top, he's a service top. He really enjoys his partner having their way with him and using him for their own pleasure.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Inexperienced, but makes up for it with enthusiasm. He's had maybe one partner in the past, and he doesn't really know what he's doing, but by the Gods is he eager to learn. Tell him what to do, how you like it, and he'll do his damnedest.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary. I sincerely believe that sex is something monolithic and sacred for this man; he likes the romance, the ritual of the thing. He wants to hold hands and make eye contact. He's also not opposed to his partner being on top.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He tries to be serious, but he's so shy and there's more than a few blunders during the act, and that lends itself to some giggling. It takes him a while to relax and realize that sex isn't some intense, strict thing.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I think he trims, but doesn't shave completely.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Intensely romantic. As I said in the favorite position section, sex is about much more than the physical to him; it's about the union, it's about showing his partner how much he loves them. Lots of breathy 'I love you's.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I really don't think he masturbates often. When is there time for that, really, with how busy he is with Harper business? When he has a partner, too, I feel that he prefers to get off with them instead of alone. On the rare occasion that he does, it's a quick affair that's done mostly out of necessity - usually ends with him biting down on the heel of his palm to stifle his sounds, thinking of his partner as he spills onto his fingers.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

This man would go insane if his partner edged him. He just would. Edging and overstimulation, 100%, I will not be taking criticisms at this time.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He's not really the... adventurous type? I feel like he'd really prefer to be in the bedroom, to have a specific place set aside for an act that he puts so much importance on. He's not opposed to bath or shower sex, though.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

The little things. A lingering touch, a stolen glance, the bead of sweat on his partner's brow after a long day. It really doesn't take a lot; he's got a fairly high libido (covered more in the Yearning section).

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He does not ever, ever want to hurt his partner. Sorry to all the hard!dom Geraldus girlies (gn) out there, but have you seen this man? He looks like he's going to cry constantly. I think he would genuinely be distraught if his partner ever asked him to indulge in sadism. Or masochism, for that matter; sex isn't meant to be painful, in his eyes.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

GIVING!!!! I'm not saying he would be good at it at first, but dear god does this man have enthusiasm. The sloppiest head his partner has ever received in their entire life; so much fucking spit.

If his partner returned the favor, though? I think he'd short circuit. Give this man a blowjob.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Slow and sensual, always. Sometimes he gets a little over-enthusiastic or desperate, but even then I wouldn't call him rough.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He would really, really prefer to take his time with his partner, but he isn't opposed to the occasional quickie if they both really need it. He'd still be soft and sweet during the whole thing, and would probably forget that a quickie is, in fact, supposed to be quick.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He's open to experimentation in some aspects - softer kinks, mostly. Nothing hard. As for risks... no. He's really not the voyeurism or exhibitionist type, he's not going to hurt his partner, and he doesn't think sex should be associated with danger.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

One, and he finishes relatively quickly unless he's being edged. You can get more than one orgasm out of him if you're dabbling in overstim. But even if he finishes before his partner, he's more than happy to make it up to them by settling his mouth between their legs or using his fingers.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I don't think he's really the toy type, though if his partner wanted to introduce them, I don't think he'd be opposed. Give this man whatever the Faerun-equivalent of a Hitachi is? It's over for his partner.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He doesn't like teasing, I don't think; but he enjoys being teased.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

This! Man! Whines! So! Loud! Part of the reason why he really prefers to have sex in the privacy of his own home is it means he doesn't have to hold himself back. He's a whiny little thing, probably whimpers when he comes.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He's hesitant the first time his partner brings up pegging, but when he actually goes through with it? He's a changed man. Eyes rolled back, literally drooling, practically sobbing. Moral of the story - please peg this man.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Average, in my honest opinion; 5 inches with the usual amount of girth.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

High. Very high. He doesn't act on it all the time, but he is constantly down bad for his partner - he's inexperienced, and he's needy.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I don't think he falls asleep all that quickly, really; I think he likes to take his time drinking in the closeness with his partner after the fact. Will probably wait for his partner to fall asleep first.

[el-tur-el]

Sneak peek of something I'm working on. Guess who it's for 😏

[el-tur-el]

Doing it again, baby.

[el-tur-el]

Dust to Dust - Chapter One.

Pairing: Geraldus x F!Tav

Warnings: Religious Trauma, Angst

Word Count: 1,010. Read it on AO3.

Summertime in Appalachia was always such a suffocating affair; the air thick and sticky, the scent of manure hanging heavy for miles. The sleepy town she’s called home for twenty-two long years always seems to spark to life the most in the in-between, from July to late August. Children free from school, playing in the front yards. Grandmothers sitting on the wraparound porches, sipping sweet tea and lemonade and waving at passersby. The earth itself opening up, bugs stirring to life with the warmth of it all, the cicadas singing in the trees.

There was a time when she would have called it beautiful. But that feels like a lifetime ago, now.

The creek behind her house has become something of a second home to her over the years; eight years old and skipping stones with Geraldus, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches made by her mother wrapped in thick butcher paper, the jam bleeding through and making sticky purple blotches. Rhododendron smiles and chubby cheeks. Thirteen and wading through the mud in their highwaters, flipping over algae-slick stones and searching for crawdads.

Small moments of freedom. Him there for all of them.

They’re different now, the pair of them. Older and sadder, which is a silly thing to think when you’re in your early twenties and you have your entire life ahead of you. But there is a distinct somberness hanging over the both of them as they sit on the bank, mud clinging to thrift store jeans. Unsure of themselves, trying desperately to fit into their clumsy frames, skin thin and worn in its stretch over their skeletons.

Desperate to become something larger than themselves, but having no opportunity to do so.

“Have you seen that TikTok trend? The one with the oranges?” She asks, though she’s gazing up at the overcast sky, the blanket of clouds that seem to suffocate the sunlight. Fitting.

“I don’t have TikTok.” He’s folded up on himself, always so scared of taking up space, even now. Knees pressed against his chest, his arms hugged around them. So much limb and nowhere to put it.

She’d very much like to slot herself in the spaces between his ribs, help him stretch out, transcend the need for flesh. Bones picked clean by the vultures, all bloated carrion and freedom. Maybe then he could relax. Maybe then she could find meaning.

“Oh. Well, basically, it’s like… if someone really cares about you, they’d peel your orange for you, or something. Little acts of service. It’s a thing for relationships, I guess. A test.” She tosses a stone at the water, watches the splash and ripple of it like it’ll somehow tell her how to break free.

It doesn’t. Her gaze flickers to Geraldus.

“That seems rather silly. Why would you need to test your relationship?”

“I would peel an orange for you.” She says with certainty, with finality. They are not together, and it’s foolish to hope that they ever will be, but perhaps these small declarations can be an act of rebellion in their own right. A tiny act of selfishness. “I’d peel as many oranges for you as you wanted.”

He does not point out to her that they are not, in fact, in a relationship.

Instead, quietly, he murmurs, “I would peel an orange for you too, Tav.”

And then the cicadas swallow them whole once more.

—

It is late in the Winter of 2009 - snow blankets the rolling hills and farmland for miles around. The groundhog saw his shadow this year, and the people on the news say that that means six more weeks of cold. She is 8 years old, and all she knows is that more snow means less school, which means more time to watch re-runs on TV and drink the thick, cloying hot chocolate her mother makes.

Life is good. As good as it can be.

“Do you think that you’ll grow up to be a pastor like your dad someday, Geraldus?” She asks as they haul their sleds up the bank of a retention pond - mercifully dry for the season, and perfect for all kinds of chaos when the snow is as light and powdery as this.

“I think so. That’s what he wants me to do.” He’s all rosy cheeks and glossy eyes, the cold air biting at skin. His mother didn’t send him out with a scarf - she decides that maybe she’ll have her grandmother teach her to crochet after all, so that she can make him one.

“But is that what you want to do?” She stops, looking at him with as concerned an expression as an eight year old can manage. “I think you should be allowed to do what you want to do. That’s what the people on the news say all the time. That we live in America and people should be allowed to do what they want.”

He pauses, too. “I think I want to. Why shouldn’t I?”

“It sounds boring.” She crinkles up her nose as a particularly strong breeze cuts through, kicking up snow with it, swirling it around them. “You’d have to read the bible like, all the time. And say grace even when you’re really hungry and you don’t want to.”

“My dad says reading the bible is good. Being a good Christian will get you into Heaven.”

“Your dad says a lot of things. He’s kind of boring, too.”

“Maybe.” He says, and there’s a pause before he’s moving on to the next thing in the way that kids always seem to, without a second thought, scatterbrained and rambunctious. “I’ll race you to the top!”

She nearly trips as she moves to chase after him, her sled dragging behind her.

Maybe thinking a little too hard about life and what to do about it is something better reserved for when you’re bigger.

—

The next day, when they once again find themselves at the creek, he pulls out two peeled clementines wrapped neatly in paper towels.

She doesn’t know what to do about life now, either.

[el-tur-el]

Growing up Baptist, for lack of a better word, sucked. Royally.

Her teenage years were marked by the syrupy sweet burn of Fireball snuck under her parent’s noses, bible study on Wednesday nights, and church every Sunday. A large congregation numbering in the thousands, projectors with lyrics to some Christian rock song she’d unconsciously learned every word to, memorizing all the books of both the Old and New Testament in order for a coupon for a free drink at the coffee bar downstairs.

And Geraldus. There was always, always Geraldus.

Now, as a young adult in her early twenties, she wonders what keeps her coming. Is it the Pastor’s jagged smile, just a touch too wrong? Is it the way the church seems to breathe late at night when it’s empty? Or is it Geraldus, with soft, wet eyes and gentler hands?

Something wicked this way comes, indeed.

A Harper Geraldus x Tav Modern AU

Chapters starting 3/24/24.