#General Klytus

[silveragelovechild]

FLASH GORDON (1980) - General Klytus' (Peter Wyngarde) Face Mask

[chernobog13]

No, it's not a gold plated Doc Doom! It's General Klytus, leader of Mongo's secret police, from Flash Gordon (1980).

[cuprohastes]

Job Scam.

I'm applying for work again because... well I need work. That's life, welcome to Capitalism.

Which means that I'm getting a lot of scam emails and Telegram messages.

And because I am boooored, Klytus, I thought I'd share. It's a real email and real situations, but maybe it helps someone learn how to spot a bad email!

ONE Telegram Scam

Take a drink. Hydrate, you raisin!

If anyone contacts you about a job paid in USDT it's not a typo, that's a crypto coin. They're planning on 'paying' you in crypto then oh dear you need to pay them real money to get your balance out, which turns out to be... fake.

There's no actual coin in the wallet.

The jobs are usually review bombing restaurants or something skeezy. But it sounds like easy money — $100 for 60 minutes work!

Rule of thumb: If it's too good to be true — it isn't, no matter how desperate you are.

TWO Fake emails.

Take a look at this:

from: Danny@meetacpgroup.co.uk Hey Cuprohastes the most magnificent online dragon in the whole world (who's tail we are not worthyt o glance at) NAME! I hope you are having a lovely day so far. I can imagine over the last couple of weeks your email inbox will be full, so I will keep it short for you.  I received your cv from one of the job boards we work with and would love to discuss further on the phone with you.  We are looking for people to work directly with us and not through an agency. Our clients have huge goals for us for 2024 and we want to make sure we have teams trained up ready to meet the demands.  Potential candidates will be invited to join a Zoom video call with us to discuss our openings in a lot more detail but firstly I would like to catch up with you over a quick call. Our appointments are filling up quickly. Please call me on my number below to discuss this further. I look forward to speaking to you soon. *PLEASE NOTE YOU MUST BE ABLE TO WORK FULL TIME AND BE OVER THE AGE OF 18* *WE CAN NOT EMPLOY ANYONE ON TIER 4 STUDENT VISAS* All the best, Danny 07824645464 Leeds City Centre

OK I highlighted some of the red flags.

Let's check that number: 07824645464

Whocalledme (who-called.co.uk) shows that this is a scam where multiple people are invited to a Zoom meeting, and you're kicked for asking for details.

Second, let use Due Dilligence the website.

Meetacp.co.uk appears genuine if generic, and you can look them up on Companies House

Companies House is the UK government's public list of all companies that have registered as a legal company. It supplies their registered address, officers and financial reports, so investors can check that they're y'know, real.

However, the email is from meetacpgroup.co.uk — A quick check of meetacpgroup.co.uk shows… no website. The domain is registered so that email can be sent and received, but there's no site.

After that, the rest is basically an irrelephant, but:

Nobody is listing their address as the entire city of Leeds. Real businesses have addresses. Because they don't need to hide.

We received your details from *mumble*. Really? You can't tell me where you got my info? Is that because you don't want me to go "Wait, I don't use that site!"?

Business correspondence usually has more than a first name

There's no branding or legal boilerplate on the original email either — It all came as plain text.

There's a part about appointments filling up quick to make you stop and call right away stop thinking don't check just call!

No serious job offers tarts with "Call us". They'll either arrange a time over email or refer you to a web page with a date picker.

OK So. Down the memory hole. Stay safe, and for that one reader: You forgot your meds again.

[nerds-yearbook]

Flash Gordon was released on December 5, 1980. While the opening scenes modernized Flash Gordon (Sam J Jones) to 1980 and changed him from a polo player to a football player, once he and Dale Arden (Melody Anderson) met with scientist and inventor Dr Hans Zarkov (Topol), the costumes, sets, props, and characters took on the look of the Alex Raymond comic strip from the mid 1930's to the early 1940's. As with the comic strip, Flash, Dale, and Zarkov left our world to go to space to confront the man who was threatening the Earth, Ming the Merciless (Max von Sydow). Aiding the earthlings, were Prince Barin (Timothy Dalton) and Prince Vultan (Brian Blessed). Ming also had his own alies in his daughter Princess Aura (Ornella Muti), and evil henchmen Klytus (Peter Wyngarde) and General Kala (Mariangela Melato). The movie was famous for the powerful score and soundtrack by the rock band Queen. ("Flash Gordon", Film, Event)

[fancoloredglasses]

[RERUN] FLASH! AH-AHHHHHHHHH! (conclusion)

[All images are owned by Universal Pictures and King Features Syndicate. Please don’t sue me]  

[Thank you for taking this journey with me. I hope you enjoyed the format. If you would like to see more like this, please let me know]

PREVIOUSLY ON...

Flash Gordon, Dale Arden, and Hans Zarkov have traveled to the planet Mongo to attempt to save the Earth from Ming the Merciless, who will crash the moon into  the  Earth in (by Zarkov’s estimate) about 14 hours. Prince Barin of Arboria has joined Flash in his quest, and together they defeated Ming’s chief advisor Klytus. In retaliation, Ming has imprisoned Dale, Zarkov, and Barin. He then made an offer to Flash to join him to save the Earth, but...well, the clip that begins the conclusion of our story will explain the rest.

(Thanks to Fandango Movieclips)

(Was there any doubt he’d escape?)

Meanwhile, Vultan and the Hawkmen have retreated to Arboria. (you’d think the Arborians would be pissed at them, given how Vultan captured Barin, then allowed him to be imprisoned by Ming...) Vultan is wishing he’d have saved Flash and the others in hindsight.

Naturally, that’s when Flash contacts Vultan and lets him know what happened. Vultan agrees to pledge his people to help Flash defeat Ming.

Meanwhile at Mingo City, Dale is being prepared for her wedding (hopefully under armed guard, given how she skipped out on Ming’s last booty call) when for some reason Aura is tossed in the room as well. (shouldn’t she be in a cell somewhere?)

After a brief pillow/cat fight, Aura convinces Dale that she’s a prisoner as well, and tries to convince Dale to murder Ming on their honeymoon, but Dale takes the high road (despite the fact that she knows Ming will go back on his word to spare Barin and Zarkov if she cooperates)

Outside Mingo City, Flash approaches on the rocket cycle (is he lost?), prompting the city’s weapons to open fire. Fortunately, they have the accuracy of “elite” troops from a certain other Empire.

Flash retreats as General Kala orders the military to send out one or their warships, Ajax, to kill him and bring back proof it actually happened this time (making her the smartest member of the Mongo military)

Ajax chases Flash to a large cloud. Ajax then charges the cloud with enough electricity to kill him...

...if he was actually hiding in the cloud and not on the other side of it with the entire Hawkman army. Finally, the captain of the Ajax is tired of waiting and goes in after Flash. I’m sure he wasn’t too pleased when he saw what was on the other side.

(Thanks again to Fandango Movieclips)

With the main hull now breached, Flash and Vultan easily take the rest of the ship.

Back and Mingo City, Aura manages to escape (because Ming’s soldiers are idiots) and free Barin and Zarkov.

She then rushes back to the wedding so as to not arouse suspicion from Ming as Zarkov and Barin work to take over the military command.

Back at the Hawkman horde, Flash has taken command of Ajax. Vultan reveals his plan to use Ajax as a flying bomb to destroy Mingo City’s defenses so his army can fly in unmolested. 

Flash sets a timer with how much time Earth has left (is there really anything left worth saving at this point?)

Once again, I’m gonna set a real-time timer to see exactly when Earth dies as opposed to when it’s “saved” (I mean, even if Ming is defeated, how are they getting the moon back into orbit? Who’s gonna pay for all the restoration that will need to be done? This and more will be revealed...wait, never mind. There’s no cliffhanger this time, since Sam Jones walked out and all plans for a sequel were scapped as a result) on-screen. My handy-dandy run-time meter has the movie at...

...which means the Earth dies at 1:40:14. So let’s get this final battle started!

Back at Mingo City, the wedding ceremony has started. Who knew “Here Comes the Bride” was the traditional wedding song across the cosmos?

(Flash’s timer says 15 seconds have passed, but my timer says 27 seconds...)

Imperial shuttles have a banners that read...

That Ming really knows how to host a shindig!

In the Command Center, Kala suspects something is amiss as Ajax approaches (again, smarter than the entire Imperial army) and immediately orders all defenses to shoot down Ajax.

The defense field covering the city is keeping those at the wedding from seeing what’s happening, so Kala lets everyone know nothing is wrong...move along.

Vultan tells Flash to set the auto-pilot so they can get out in time. Unfortunately, Flash realizes the enemy fire is too heavy and the only way Vultan can bail out and lead the attack is for him to stay at the controls to provide cover for Vultan.

Back at the Command Center, Barin and Zarkov gain control, killing Kala in the process.

The pair learn that Ajax is about to be destroyed against the city’s defense field and that Flash is aboard, so Barin heads to weapons control as Zarkov tries to do something from there.

(It should be noted that my timer says the Earth has been dead for about a minute)

Finally, Ming makes his appearance and the ceremony can commence. Ming utters vows that clearly show what Ming thinks of the sanctity of the institution of marriage.

Back on Ajax, Zarkov’s timer says the Earth has been dead for over a minute a minute and 47 seconds remaining...

At weapons control, Barin takes over and shuts down the field. You can imagine the look of shock and horror on Ming’s face when, from at least a mile away, he somehow sees Flash at the controls bearing down on him.

In fact, let’s see the 4 minutes or so after the Earth’s death Flash save the Earth at the last second...

(Once again, thanks to Fandango Movieclips)

The escort bot (remember that from Part 2?) informs Flash that the Earth is saved (well, the moon didn’t crash on it anyway...

...although by my timer that happened 5 1/2 minutes ago)

Vultan unilaterally declared Barin the new ruler of Mongo. Seeing as he has an army to back up his words, no one argues. Barin orders an end to all the fighting between the Kingdoms.

From there, we reach the end of our story...

...though there’s a hint that it might not be over. (Given that Jones walked out before shooting ended, I would say yes, it’s over.)

Even (Especially!) with effects that were cheesy back then, the film is a fun ride, especially with von Sydow and Blessed completely going over-the-top in their roles (then again, Brian Blessed is always like that...)

I hope you enjoyed!

[deadbeatescape]

pokemon types the flash gordon characters would have

flash gordon: normal + electric

dale arden: normal

dr. hans zarkov: psychic

prince vultan: flying + fighting

prince barin: grass

ming the merciless: fire

princess aura: dragon

general klytus: steel

general kala: dark

[diegotripodi]

[abs0luteb4stard]

⚡ϟWATCHINGϟ⚡

First time seeing it. It's long overdue.

I never thought I'd enjoy this.

It's really fucking excellent.

[fuyuoh3]

Idk klytus introducing me to some assholes probably

[ultrakillblast]

FLASH GORDON (1980)

[verminas-dungeon-doodles]

One of my many renditions of General Klytus, one of my favorite characters from one of my favorite movies, Flash Gordon! You will see a lot of him here. 

[chernobog13]

General Klytus (Peter Wyngarde), the head of Mongo’s secret police in Flash Gordon (1980).

I always felt that, with a few modifications, this could be the basis of an excellent Doctor Doom costume.

[skeletonfumes]

Flash Gordon (1980) Mike Hodges

[raincausespaininmybrain]

Klytus .. I'm Bored.....

Flash Gordon (1980)

[fancoloredglasses]

[RERUN] FLASH! AH-AHHHHHHHHH! (part 3)

[All images are owned by Universal Pictures and King Features Syndicate. Please don’t sue me]

PREVIOUSLY ON...

Hans Zarkov has kidnapped Flash Gordon and Dale Arden in an attempt  to save the Earth from an alien attack that will crash the moon into the Earth in (by Zarkov’s estimate) less than 11 days. The three are captured by Ming the Merciless. Zarkov has been turned over to Ming’s chief advisor Klytus, Dale has been turned over to Ming’s bedroom, and Flash...well...

(Thanks to Zoomazoom3)

Now, on to our story...

We open on a holding area for corpses to be buried (it says something that there’s a waiting area for corpses). Aura and the Imperial surgeon (the guy who gave Flash the shot earlier) enter the chamber. It turns out Aura is fooling around with him (is there anyone she isn’t?) He give Flash’s corpse another shot and runs off with the promise of another romp soon.

Aura then rouses Flash with (what else?) a kiss and gives him a Mongo pilot’s uniform to wear as they sneak out of the city to Arboria.

Meanwhile, Ming tells Zarkov that the only reason the Earth is doomed is because Zarkov recognized that what was happening to the Earth in the opening credits wasn’t freak acts of nature, making the planet dangerous. So one crackpot no one (including his own assistant) takes seriously dooms the planet?

Ming then turns Zarkov over to Klytus and General Kala who...well, we’ll let them explain...

(Thanks again to Zoomazoom3)

OK, a couple notes about Zarkov’s life...

It appears that, as a joke, someone threw Zarkov’s wife in the pool but she couldn’t swim. Did everyone just laugh as she drowned? Why didn’t anyone dive in to save her?

I always giggle at Klytus thinking Hitler “showed promise”. Did he mean that he admired Hitler’s brand of evil or that he had a shot at unifying the planet?

Kala then reprograms Zarkov to be an Imperial spy. Given Zarkov’s screams, I’m guessing it was a more strenuous process than wiping his memory...

En route to Arboria, Aura teaches Flash to fly Mongo craft while at the same time trying to seduce him. Let’s just say the first task is going better than the second.

Aura then pulls out a telepathy machine to send a message to Barin.

(Thanks to Fandango)

Oh yeah, forgot to mention that Ming has been having his way with Dale.

A serving...servant arrives to pour Dale some sort of aphrodisiac...

...but Dale manages to convince her to drink it instead, then swaps outfits and sneaks out before Ming shows up and realizes he’s about to have his way with the wrong woman.

In her escape she manages to take out four guards on her own before fleeing (I don’t think these men were on the right pills either)

She then runs into Zarkov and tells him of Flash’s escape, not knowing what had happened to him (or that Klytus is listening in). Klytus opens the city, allowing the pair to “escape”. Klytus informs Ming of Flash’s resurrection...

...and that he has an idea who did it. Ming tells Klytus to find out who, no matter what or how.

Back on Arboria, Aura has landed the craft and is headed to Barin’s stronghold, where a young warrior is undergoing a Test of Worthiness by blindly sticking his hand in a tree trunk where a deadly beast resides (presumably to see if it accepts him)

Unfortunately, the beast doesn’t and stings him in the wrist with a venom that slowly and painfully kills its victim. The warrior begs for a quick death and Barin grants it as Aura and Flash enter.

Barin, to put it mildly, is pissed the hell off at Aura dropping her treasonous plaything at his feet. Aura threatens to break up with him if he kills Flash (Dude, I know she’s the Emperor’s daughter, but you can do so much better than her cheating ass)...

...so he settles for locking him in a cage with his other prisoners and dropping him in the swamp.

Meanwhile, it turns out Zarkov wasn’t turned by Klytus after all thanks to a lifetime of trivia (I knew all those years rotting my brain with TV and movies would pay off one day!)

Unfortunately, they run smack into a Hawkman patrol and are captured.

Back in the Imperial City, Klytus has arrested Aura and tortures her until she confesses to cheating on Barin betraying Ming. Ming sentences Aura to be banished to Frigia for a year following his wedding to Dale, then married off to Klytus.

Barin hatches a plan to be able to kill Flash (thus keeping him off of Ming’s bad side) and still keep Aura from leaving him (Dude, seriously...you’re gonna be James Fucking Bond! You don’t gotta take this shit!) and drafts his lieutenant Fico to help.

BTW, if Fico looks or sounds familiar, maybe this will jog your memory...

(Thanks to Lex121100)

Yep, that’s Richard O’Brien AKA Riff Raff!

Anyway, guards shove Riff Raff Fico in the cage with Flash and the other prisoners. Fico tells Flash he has the means to escape, but they’ll need weapons. Flash follows Fico back to the stronghold...

...where he is promptly arrested for trespassing by Fico.

Barin then emerges, saying he can either die where he stands, or take his chances with the beast in the trunk. Flash puts his hand in, cries out, and pulls his hand free, clutching his wrist. Flash asks to be put out of his misery...

...but jumps Barin as he goes for his sword (he was faking being stung, see?).

Flash then escapes to the swamp with Barin in pursuit.

Flash then falls prey to quicksand, which sucks him under!

WILL Flash survive?

WHAT will happen to DALE AND ZARKOV at the hands of the HAWKMEN?

WILL Klytus and Aura make a LOVELY couple?

These questions and more will be answered in PART FOUR of...

(Thank to Olaf Sings)

[hgordon-smith]

Flash Gordon (1980)

Film