#Gay Sauna the Board Game

[kim]

Originally proposed on Kickstarter in 2019 and then 2022, but I was only just told about it today: Gay Sauna the Board Game.

Two to six players.

[talenlee]

June 2024 Wrapup!

That’s it, Pride’s over. We’re done with any need to be queer because we obviously defeated the forces of not queer.

Hey how do all those dudes who are convinced they’re straight think their sexuality handles being attracted to nonbinary people? Like, nonbinary people can look like anything, presentation is a performance and everything, but if you believe in inherent qualities of genders, seeing a nonbinary person who’s hot has to be a problem right?

(oh who are we kidding, they pretend nonbinary people don’t exist. But if you do accept nonbinary people exist, you might be less straight than you think.)

Alright, let’s look at what articles came up in the Game Pile this month!

Gay Sauna: The Board Game, where we talked about the acceptable boundaries of genre mechanisms.

Arcade Spirits, where I made a video retelling my experiences of dealing with a game that I shouldn’t call a visual novel, because someone out there will get annoyed at an imperfect cladistic categorisation of game genres

Signalis, a game that oozes style but also told me to stop playing it, so I did

3 Indie TTRPGs, with Feathers, For the Dungeon and We Saved The World Once in a video

If you think the video on Feathers, For The Dungeon and We Saved The World Once was a bit ropy, yep! It got made very quick and close to the deadline because it was very difficult to make. Cooking these games down to entirely positive feedback without talking more about things I find personally interesting was hard enough, which is why the first seven minutes of the video are about problems with how we talk about indie TTRPGs.

Also, a thing I was really delighted by was getting to play Loom with Fox for the first time (part 1, part 2)!

Then there was this month’s Story Pile, about which I was way more enthusiastic!

Nimona, which is a great movie for kids,

Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch From Mercury, which is a great anime, for slightly older kids!

Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess And The Genius Young Lady, which is a mid anime, for slightly older kids still!

Bound, which is, uh, it’s not for kids

What else happened this month that I’m proud of?

Hm.

Hmmm.

This is a surprising one to say because normally I can think of articles that I want you to read in a sort of ‘well why haven’t you looked at this.’ But I’m in a bad mood right now and it’s colouring things about how I look at my own writing. My article on LIGMA is tainted by knowing how little of the greater context of the area I can communicate. My article about What Disgusts Jod got a response from a Locked Tomb fan that seemed to imply that actually, Jod wasn’t bi or pansexual, because a guy can have a threesome with a man and a woman and people will still try and pretend bisexuality doesn’t exist. My article about Tieflings was probably the thing I’m the most proud of this month, in the idea of the kind of writing I like doing, and I think my article on Faces For Skins is important? At least I avoided another breakdown article about how badly I feel Pride culture connects to or relates to me, though maybe that just shows up in the work in general.

There’s this month’s shirt design:

How hard is the Barbie aesthetic to replicate? With lookalike fonts it’s shockingly easy. I note that this one specifically is a drop shadow and not a 3d semblance, as you can see on the bottoms of the ls. Hey, do you want this on a sticker? Go for it!

In terms of real world events, June is jam packed. It’s the end of the Autumn Semester for me, as a tutor for one. This semester, I took on a lot of marking work, which I like to do, but which also meant that I looked at 118 asignments this month, and 60 of them had a 5 minute audio visual component. That’s five hours of student material to just watch. It ain’t nothing, and it adds up over time.

It’s also a time with four major family birthdays in them, which means I have to find ways and times to attend to physical events. This is not a problem, because I love my family but it sure makes me mindful of just how long it takes me to recover from that to do, y’know, things with myself like write for the blog. Marking periods take time out of the blog work.

The subject matter of the month is also less of a freebie than you might think because I feel like some things are too repetitive – I don’t imagine I’m going to find a third Transformers character to write about next year, for example. There’s also the way that February and June kinda blur together – I’m very fond of talking about queer media in February since that’s one of the most fun kinds of smoochy media I like.

I aim to keep the queued posts for this blog up to 50, so every day if I add a post, it goes to 51 and dips back down to 50. I also try to make sure I’m four weeks ahead on the video channels. This month, as I write this, I am one week ahead on the video, and the queue is down to 45. I am frustrated! But I am doing things to overcome that, and in the coming weeks, I don’t have to grapple with a theme!

I haven’t been getting to bed at good times. This month has featured multiple days where I get to bed at 4 in the morning, one even at 5. This is bad and I hate it. I hate it especially because it takes a long time to recover from it, to get back to sleeping at even the modestly more sensible time of midnight to one AM. I also haven’t been cooking as much as I want to — even modest resistance means that suddenly dinner is some microwaved oats and sultanas, with a splash of milk.

I think I may even be missing one of my June goals for Magic The Gathering: Arena, which isn’t exactly important, but it is a bit of a pisser. The aim was to hit gold tier in limited, which at this point I have… a few hours to do, and I’m still in Silver Tier. That’s not a big deal but it is a bummer.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[saunagame]

Gay Sauna the Board Game

The hot and steamy board game adventure where you score points, by scoring guys!

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you or have you ever owned a cup with your name on it? Nope. What’s the most expensive crafts tool that you own? I don’t have any expensive craft tools. Have you ever woven baskets of any kind (wicker, paper, cardboard etc.)? No. How do you like Great Balls of Fire by Jerry Lee Lewis? I’m familiar with the song, but I wouldn’t say it’s a favorite song of mine or anything. Speaking of Jerry Lee Lewis, have you seen the biopic about him? Nope

How about the biopic about Tina Turner? Nope. Do you like the TV-show Frasier? No. The Hallmark Channel plays a few back-to-back episodes of The Golden Girls at night and then afterwards a few episodes of Frasier before I Love Lucy. I always change it when Frasier comes on. What’s something you know by heart? A lot of things, I suppose. Lyrics to many songs for one. How valuable does a coin have to be for you to bother to pick it up? I’d probably stop to pick up a quarter. What would be something you would wait in line to get for free? Coffee. In Finland people wait in line for free buckets. Oh. Has there ever been a leak anywhere in your house? Yes. Have you ever slipped in the shower? No. Have you ever made any decorative crafts? If so, are they displayed? Nope. Is it very humid where you are right now? No. What is the most suggestive thing someone has said to you? Uhhh. I don’t know. Do you have friends who you playfully flirt with? No. Doesn’t the Z in the Bzoink logo look like an L to you, too? No. Did you ever take that 5000 question survey that was circulating Tumblr? I took most of it. I still have yet to finish it. It would get overwhelming and I’d take breaks from it, which usually resulted in me forgetting about it entirely. It’s been awhile since I did one of the parts. Have you ever had to change a zipper in your favourite article of clothing? No. Do you prefer buttons or zippers in general? Zippers. Did you grandma have a box full of pretty buttons? She had that cookie tin, you know the one, with sewing supplies and whatnot. Why do all grandparents have that? What’s the most exotic spice in your spice rack? I wouldn’t say there’s anything “exotic” in there. Do buttons tempt you to press them? No. I’m more afraid to if I don’t know what it’s for. Do you have a favourite television host? Dr. Phil. What’s your opinion on celebrity chefs? I don’t care. Back when it first started, did you watch ANTM? Not when it first started, but I watched a few later seasons. I watched the last 2 latest ones. The one where it came back and Rita Ora replaced Tyra and then the last season that was on where Tyra came back. Did you know, that there was even a Finnish version of ANTM? Nope. Are you accident prone? Not usually. Have you ever broken something really valuable? Yes. What do you see as timeless? A lot of the songs I like that are from the late 60s, 70′s, 80s, 90s, and early 2000′s. What is something that you own, that has sentimental value? A lot of things. Have you ever had your own website? I had a freewebs or whatever that I made before as a fansite. What’s your favourite board game? I love board games in general. How about your favourite card game? Cards Against Humanity, ha. What’s something that you finished recently? My cup of coffee. What’s the smallest town you recall visiting? This little unknown town in my state where my grandparents stayed once while they were visiting (they live out of state, but travel in their RV every summer to visit). I don’t remember why they chose that particular town that year. What’s the longest distance you’ve had to go to work or school? Not far at all. My college was local and less than a 10 minute drive away. Would you learn a new language, if you didn’t share one with your lover? Sure. I guess I’d have to in that case. Do you have friends who are constantly tagging you in challenges on FB? Not challenges, but I have a friend who is always tagging me in some giveaway thing they’re entering on Instagram or Twitter. It’s actually rather annoying. When it comes to chocolate, do you prefer nougat, jelly or caramel filling? I’m not a fan of fillings in my chocolate, really. It depends, though. Are you more concerned about winning than just participating? No. Has somebody you know taken their own life? No. What is a number that has some significance to you? Why is that? 8. I don’t know why, but it’s been my favorite number since I was a kid. Do you prefer onions, leeks or chives? Chives. What’s the most adult thing you have to do every day? I can’t think of any “adult” thing I have to do everyday. The most adult thing I do I’d say is pay bills. What’s the most immature thing you like to do every day? I don’t think I do something everyday that would be considered “immature.” *shrug* Have you seen the movie, Clue? If so, isn’t it fab? Nah. Do your cheeks get flushed easily? Yes. I get warm easily. Do you blush easily in general? Yes. Are there any social cues you miss entirely? I’m usually pretty good with that stuff. When someone doesn’t smile back at you, what’s your first thought? It makes things awkward. Is there a person who melts your heart just by looking at you? My doggo. ha. Have you ever had tom kha kai? Nope. Have you, or anyone you know ever been rude to a server? I never have, but I know people who are. What’s something you’re opinionated and very vocal about? Meh. ^When’s the last time you had to verbally defend your stance? I’m usually one to keep quiet about that stuff. Have you ever played BitLife? Nope. What’s something you regularly order online? I do a lot of shopping online. Usually for clothes or ordering food. When’s the last time you made a penpal? We had one in 3rd grade. Do you often make friends online? I used to. Do people ever try to get something from somebody through you? No. As in, they ask you to ask the person they should be asking in the first place. If that makes sense. It’s happened, but it’s not something that happens often. What do you think when you see a couple holding hands? Sometimes I’ll think, “aww” and other times I don’t give it much thought. Gay couples and old couples make me go, “Awww!” Okay. Is there anything you’re forced to share with someone else? No. What’s something stripy that you own? I don’t think I have anything. How about something polka dotted? I don’t think I have anything like that either. What is something you find absolutely appalling? Lots of things. Do you like elevators? Not particularly, but I don’t have a choice if I’m somewhere with stairs. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when I say “midnight madness”? Nothing, really. What is a country you would never want to visit? Hmm. When you’re angry, does it ever get physical? No. What do you do, when you’re immensely happy? I’d have to really think about the last time I was “immensely” happy. What made you scream out loud the last time you screamed? I don’t recall. Can you hear your neighbours through the wall? Sometimes. What is something that frustrates you to no end? My current situation. Do you wear shoes indoors? No. Who is your favourite stand-up comedian? I don’t have one. What’s the weirdest video youtube has suggested to you? Who knows. What’s the funniest infomercial you’ve seen? Those ridiculous ones where they over exaggerate and the person like trips over nothing and knock everything over or something. You know the ones. Is there a drink that just goes right through you? Coffee and water. Is there a food item you can’t eat because it doesn’t agree with you? Spicy food. :( I used to eat spicy food all the time, but after I had surgery on my intestine things weren’t the same. Do you playfully compete with someone about something? When playing board games. Would you rather swim or run? Run. I can’t swim. Do you like the smell of tar? No. Have you ever been to a sauna? Nooo, and I’d never want to. Does your doorbell ring unexpectedly often? No. Is your favourite fictional character a human, an animal or something else? Human. Have you ever helped a stranger? If so, what did you do? Yeah like with directions. Although, I don’t know how helpful I really was. I’m actually the worst with directions. Do you share hobbies with any of your friends? What do you do together? What friends. Do you have any flags on display? If so, what flag(s)? I have a big Swedish flag on my wall.

[gapimnydiaries]

Diary Entry #24: My experience being queer Asian American with disability

Dear Diary,

It first started when I was a child. Family is traditional and strict. Such as comparing their children to others, expect them get good grades, earn high income, give money for parents to spend, get marry early, and produce children. This is what Asian families all want. Being raised in a Western world brings many cultural conflict. For me, I was raised in New York and adopt most Western culture. Hard to let Asians parents understand what is true love and what is the truth of life. My parents are uneducated and parenting is poor. They kept abusing and neglecting me since toddlerhood. This caused me have disabilities. Such as stutter, learning disability, anxiety, and low self-esteem. During all these years, I have trouble letting people understand my speech. Moreover, have social anxiety because few of talking to people.

When I was a child, some of my relatives often fool around with me. Once, my cousin wants to play game with me so we played fighting. Then, things got weird. Such as undressing me and touched me. That time, I didn’t know what this is. Next, nothing else happens. However, this happen multiple times. Having another cousin touch me body-to-body and some family members touching my private part. That time, my mind was fuzzy. Don’t know what happen until I know after growing up.

Years later, still have no loyal friends with me. Many just talk to me during school and play sports together. I just go to school and return home; then do my homework and sleep. This cycle repeatedly occur for years. However, I became very lonely because lack of true love from friends and family. Teachers lost trust on me for not doing well. They thought I’m Asian so should be smart but we are the same as others. In addition, I dislike many random students at the cafeteria kept coming to me asking how to solve their math problems. That time, my mind feel shame because I didn’t know the answer. This is stereotype for thinking every Asian knows math. To be honest, not every Asian is smart or talent. Probably, the Asians they saw on TV; were picked actors or famous people.

As my depression and anxiety gets worse, I have no ways to recover. Nobody would come near me. So I stay in front of computers every day. Watching shows and playing games to reduce down stress. One day, browsed a video with muscular male models. That time, my heart has a strong love beat. Those models entertained me. After keep searching, end up into a porn website. That time, watched those videos for hours losing conscious on time. This continue for months. Later on, mind became aware of my own body so I began touching myself. Understand the human body. For porn, watched many anime straight videos. Then, the male body attracted me the most.

Years later, the videos brought me into gay porn. During high school, bought some DVDs to store and watch. My dad also does this and he is straight. One day, my mom found the DVDs while cleaning my house. She was surprised. Then, she keeps asking me whether I’m “gay”. She said she will die if I am because she expects me date a girl to produce children with no HIV. My family was not educated so they are many things they didn’t know. Even I do tell them, they will not listen because they think their way is right. Kind of like spoiled parents. Next, I kept saying I’m “Straight”. After that, I throw away everything involves gay. This made me missed those stuff. From that time, I start to watch normal contents. Full of women and funny comedies.

During college, met a classmate at my Chinese class. He is gay and dating a Chinese man from China. We talked and go home together for months. He said “We could have been together if I was not dating someone.” This sounds he likes me. But I did not like him. Then, he kept following me by taking the bus with me. I felt annoyed and uncomfortable os him being by me. I said “stop” because the messages he sent to me is so sexual and controlling. Then, he got angered and act dramatic. He act like an actress from drama by avoiding her loved man. To be honest, I dislike dramatic people by getting too emotional and cause drama. My parents are dramatic so I dislike being with people like my parents. After that, he keeps avoiding me. I just focus on my own work and ignore him for harassing me.

Months after that classmate left, I was very stressed and depressed. I posted this on Facebook and then a random person messaged me. He is a member from my non-profit organization where we practice Buddhism. He is an inactive member. On the message, he wants to go to Spa with me. That time, I was curious why he ask go to spa with someone he doesn’t know well. That time, I accept because psychologist said I need to hang out with people. Finding supportive friends. When we went to spa, we have to strip down and go into sauna. It was my first time being naked in front of large crowd. Also, also time to spa. During spa, we went into the jacuzzi, steam room, and shower. The experience was exaggerating. While we are in jacuzzi, he wants to play game with me. Whoever couldn’t answer the question has to tickle each other. After answering few questions, we tickle each other because I answer all questions so he still wants to tickle. Then, he ask sexual question such as, “How often you masturbate?”. Later, he ask “Have you had sex with men?”. These made me wonder what is my sexual orientation.

After the game, he begins touching and squeezing my private part instead tickle. I felt uncomfortable. That time, I request to get dress and go upstairs to relax. Next, we got dress and walks upstairs to take a nap. Hours later, we went to a cozy and quiet room where people take their quiet naps. He sits close to me and touch my body. I was confounded because boys wants it but mind is uncomfortable. This is the same feeling when women were raped. From psychological research, body wants it but mind often says “no”. This made them feel unconcerned. For me, it was the same. I began touching him since he touched me. Then, I decide to tie my shorts tight so he won’t pull it down again. However, he still wants it. I just got out and try to recover my mind. During evening, we are going to leave. He goes to the restroom while I wait for him. Later, he wants me go in with him. He takes me inside a stall and pulls my pants down. Then, things got sexual. Almost had sex but I said “no”. Suddenly, people outside the stall saw us and laugh. I ran out and wash up. Later, ran downstairs; get dress and leave without him. It was the worse experience I had.

After that incident, I didn’t want to talk to him. However, he still contact me and harass me by acting he is the victim. I was too naive forgiving him by hanging out with him again. He invite me to his house and play board game. Then, said whoever lose has to strip down. Same moment, didn’t know what I’m doing. At the end, he touched me and said want to do something horny. Then, we took showers together. After shower, I said to leave because felt uncomfortable and he felt tricked. He kept acting like a victim. Weeks later, he invite me again so I give him 3rd chance; biggest mistake. We play the same same and same punishment. He lost so he was naked. At the end, he made me strip down and touch me. At time, he grab my private part and later made me come out. Body felt good but then mind is full of shame for letting him play with me. After that, I refused his other request on sex. I clean up and leave. I felt so shameful for letting him do this. Immediately, deleted his contact and off-contact him. He did this to a girl before which means he is a playboy; not looking for serious relationship.

During college, I met the same classmate last 2 years at my Chinese class. He still avoids me so I only focus on my own project. He was in my same class for 1 year. Even he does contact me to add him back, I didn’t respond. After what happen on 2016 and 2017; experience made me reject those wrong offers. I learnt my lesson from these two playboys. Same during the time at 2015, I went to a gay club. That time, family was dramatic and they argue very bad. In order to calm my stress down, I went to club and had hookup. My body wants it but mind is rejecting. Had met some guys and hookup with a guy which was a shocking experience. Fear I will get HIV. That time,I had lack of knowledge of how HIV is inject. Worries for 1 year. After testing, was so happy my result is HIV Negative.

After what happened, I took a year break. Same time, I hate those gay playboys. A year later, began to attend LGBT community to understand health and their struggles. While browsing, GAPIMNY came up. The place where gay Asians are safe to discuss their stories. After learning with them, mind gain more knowledge about Asian LGBT. Later, I attend APICHA; health centre for queer to discuss their social problems and health. After learning, I finally know how to keep myself safe and do safe sex without injecting any STDs. After so many lectures, I was ashamed for wasting my time worrying on getting HIV. Now, I would laugh at myself being so anxious.

After attending many meet ups, made new friends and safe environment to experience. Life has a fresh start. Met many kind queer friends. We hang out by attending holiday festivals. Depression and anxiety became less serious after attend many new non-profit organizations. Really thank them offering opportunity and safe space to discuss anything. Not only LGBT community; also religious community. The well-practiced religious community allows us to discuss queer topics. Furthermore, their faith is to love and bring peace. We cannot judge. There are many Christian communities who support the queer. Indeed, GAPIMNY, APICHA, and all other organizations have changed my life. Turn me from young & naive to steady person. From now on, I always observe before trusting any community or people. See if they are safe for us to be around. Many more advices received from psychologists.

Even my family is traditional, seeing me changed can let them see how good my life has become. Giving credits to the communities I’ve attend. Even today, I’m finding supportive friends because not many people want to be with me. Reasons are that I’m boring, direct, lack of knowledge on recent trends, bad memory, untalented, and not intelligent. Currently, I’m slowly learning new hobbies such as drawing, instruments, singing, dancing, and photographing. My goal is to stand up and speak out for the rights instead stay silent. This is how communities or countries kept themselves safe from someone standing up. Know what is right or wrong before speak up. For now, seeing those gay couples and muscular models; made me imagine a lovely bridge. Hope the ones who experienced similar situation as me; could find their bright side overcoming these hardships. There are a lot of stuff we have not learn. I’m also learning. After we know it, life becomes better. Not from online or opinions; from the truths.

Jason Lin

[hakenden]

Why People Like Us Makes For A Good Binge

As a fervent couch potato, I keep most of my existentialism at bay by watching series or episodic shows that keep me coming back for more, for better or for worse.

While webisodes are not something I would usually binge on, I stumble upon a series produced by our neighbour down south that really caught my attention during a deep-dive on past posts of a now defunct subreddit.

Dubbed People Like Us, the series is a slice of life on the often turbulent take of your everyday Southeast Asian gays produced by gayhealth.sg, a community based organisation that aims to help improve the sexual health and services within the gay/bi/msm community through advocacy and empowerment.

Fair warning, if you are about to watch this, it may contain suggestive elements so be aware of your surrounding before you start!

Of Sexual Identity and the Scene

New message received

In the first episode of the series, we are introduced to four men and how their distinct experience and lives intertwined with the scene. We have the hopeless romantic Joel who is out and about to seek a meaningful connection; then there is Rai, who has an equally hard time in the dating game; the jaded Ridzwan, who looks to underground promiscuity as a way to cope with the duality of his life, and the adventurous Isaac, who literally is new to the scene after coming with terms of his sexual identity.

Throughout the first season, we see each of them tackle with issues that many gay men are all too familiar with such as cruising in bathhouses (sauna), the casual hookup culture, living with one’s faith, tradition and societal expectations while juggling with their sexual identity, and the tribulation of intimacy within the gay/bi/msm community.

Different Countries, Same Struggles

Right now you might be thinking, those are not isolated issues and that the gay/bi/msm community around the world faces in a whole, so what makes this series a lot more relatable to us folks here in Malaysia?

The localised portrayal in the series really hits close to home

As a country that was formerly part of Malaya, Singapore shares many things that resonate with Malaysians such as the ethnicity of the characters. They too represent the majority population of Malaysians which are the Chinese, the Indians and the Malays. It goes without saying that there are dialogues from the cast which are not just in English, but with a touch of Malay and Singlish (and to a certain extent, Manglish). While not entirely represented colloquially, it still draws parallel to a narrative that we as Malaysians can picture ourselves in when compared to other western-based gay-centric narratives.

In spite of this similarity, there are still a lack of narratives that better reflect the state of the LGBT community in Malaysia itself.

But why?

Gay Malaysian Short Films, Where Art Thou?

As Malaysians, we find ourselves at a loss in terms of proper representation in media simply because there are plenty of regulations as well as censorship dictated by LPF (Film Censorship Board of Malaysia). So why not take it to a platform that is not governed by them, you ask?

The answer is fear.

Fear of prosecution. The fear for all who are involved would suffer from unwarranted witch hunt.

There is not a lack of creative content producers in our country let alone the means of producing them. Only the lack of implements to ensure that they can be portrayed in media without resorting to unneeded censorship or facing dire repercussions.

While it may not do us justice in portraying the pain points and struggles of our own gay/bi/msm community, People Like Us is as close as it gets.

One Thing I Would Like to See If There is a Season 3

Should this series continue to be in production (fingers crossed), I would love to see them touch on a specific issue that may not be talked about a lot outside of our own community.

At face value from the two seasons so far, all of the main characters portrayed are cisgendered males and that there has yet to be other parts within the gay/bi/msm community itself that has been represented. Perhaps they could add a character who is a FTM with his orientation to either be gay or bi and how the current character(s) would interact with him.

Overall, I do hope that there will be more episodes to come for People Like Us. Who knows, it might even pave the way for our local content producers to put together something this audacious and beautiful.

[ultimateunadon-blog]

Hideyuki

“Go home, have a good rest and a nice long shower, and don’t stress yourselves out too much.”

I clearly recalled Coach Fujine giving us, at the end of the 4-hour training, just two days before the biggest judo championship in Tokyo, the same prerecorded motivational talk everybody knew. “Tomorrow’s a Saturday, but don’t be tempted to train till you die. I did that when I was your age, at my first competition. I died. At the most, just stretch or something. Relax, before the big thing. Sunday’s your day to shine, my boys…”

Especially you, Ryuji Yamagata. I have high expectations of you; it’s about time you defeated Tadakuni Kazejima, once and for all…

Most of it hardly registered. It was the same drivel, over and over again, year after year. Coach Matsuura said the exact same things back in 2014; then he retired and scurried off to his little cottage in Niigata, and Coach Fujine came in and repeated the same things. Didn’t help much; I had three silver medals hanging on my wall as testament to that.

I was too hungry to care, anyways.

The nine of us had a team dinner at the sukiyaki place near the DonQuijote store along Takadanobaba, all sponsored by Coach Fujine and his bottomless, everlastingly abundant wallet, and then we went our separate ways, back to our mansions and apartments. Most of us did, at least.

I didn’t feel like going home so early, and neither did Hideyuki Hayashi or Kaizo Tokuda.

We had dessert at a Korean bingsu establishment near the train station, and with that over and done with, Kaizo fell into the dreaded sleep coma, burping at regular intervals like a diseased toad and rubbing his fatigued eyes, his short-cropped hair still somehow shiny from sweat.

“I’ll just go home”, he murmured, almost incoherently, lumbering into Takadanobaba Station while rubbing his grotesquely bloated belly, the stubble on his face making him look at least two times older than his 17 years. “See you on Sunday, stupid bastards.”

So it was just down to me and Hideyuki.

My heart skipped a beat the moment Kaizo was out of sight.

“Say, Ryuji”, said Hideyuki, wrapping his lean arm round my shoulder, “wanna go watch a porno movie?”

“Meh, not tonight”, I replied dryly, my eyes drifting to his arm as we walked (catching a brief glimpse of his armpit, him being one or two centimetres taller than me). I couldn’t stop looking at Hideyuki’s arms; he looked really scrawny, especially thanks to his preferring slightly oversized shirts, but when he went bare and flexed, he looked like a veritable bodybuilder; much like Vladimir Putin, in fact, but with more lines and less overflow.

“Okay, then.”

I inserted the remnants of my small change (the irritating ¥10 and ¥20 coins) into a vending machine and bought two bottles of Calpis, tossing one to Hideyuki, before we both headed up one of the commercial buildings, sneaking onto one of the rooftops.

That rooftop in Takadanobaba was one of two secret hideaways that our team had found (the other being in Roppongi) that we abused to no end. The security guards at both places didn’t seem to care much for us, seeing as we were just high school boys looking for a place to relax. From our vantage point, we could see a pretty large distance; Akihabara at 10 o’clock from the entrance, a tiny speck of obscene glare on the horizon, screaming for attention amidst the already bright lights, and Ginza just nearby.

“You don’t need to go home?” Hideyuki asked me, putting the cloth bag he kept his judogi in on the floor, before sitting down and resting his head on it like a pillow, all while sipping at the milky white yoghurt drink. “I thought your mum was quite anal about you being late.”

“Not tonight”, I replied. “She’s playing in an LoL tournament till 3 in the morning. I doubt she gives a shit about where her poor failure of a son is hanging out.”

“Ayy”, he chuckled, capping the bottle, having finished almost a third of it in a single gulp. “My girlfriend would probably kill me if she found out I liked camping outside till morning, but she’s on a nine day school trip in Kyoto, so I’m fine. Besides, my parents don’t care either way.” He whipped out his Samsung Note 7 and began texting somebody.

I cracked the cap off the top of the bottle and took a sip of the white liquid, condensation running down my fingers and dripping on the floor. My gaze wandered around tiredly, but with each sweep of the eyes, I could not help but fix my sights on Hideyuki lying there, a limp yet defined figure resting under the blinded night sky, nonchalantly texting with one hand and holding up his bottle with the other. The veins on his arm seemed to crawl about every time he moved his arm.

“I didn’t know you watched porno movies”, I said to Hideyuki, attempting to break the awkward silence.

“Once in a while”, he replied almost incongruously nonchalantly. “I don’t find it arousing as much as I find it funny. Like Haruki Murakami said, it’s funny to think that the moment they start getting it on on screen, forty men suddenly have boners simultaneously.”

“Yeah… haha…”

The bizarre conversation ended abruptly, as I finished the last few drops of my drink without even realising it, tossing the bottle into the gigantic recycling bin nearby, before sitting down cross-legged beside Hideyuki’s flaccid figure reclined on the ground. He’d finished texting his girlfriend (a pleasant 15-year-old girl by the name of Yuriko, who spoke with a Nagoya dialect), and was playing Clash Royale, swearing every time a goblin barrel managed to land successfully on his end.

Quietly, I watched.

The final goblin barrel finally did him in, as his opponent snatched the first crown of the game in overtime, much to his chagrin, obvious from his closing the game and quitting it, before heading over to Instagram. I didn’t even know it, but I’d been sitting there for five minutes straight just staring at Hideyuki and whatever he was doing on his phone.

Hideyuki, evidently, also noticed, for he craned his head up and looked at me.

“Something wrong, Ryuji?” he asked.

“It’s just…” My thoughts were in a hurricane-like flurry. Perhaps it was the fatigue from four hours of almost nonstop training under Coach Fujine the Dictator; perhaps it was the sugar rush from the Calpis (especially considering the bingsu and the two cups of root beer I drank over dinner); perhaps I was just sleepy. But my tongue seemed to be acting independently of my brain.

“Just what?”

“I love you”, I blurted out, too confused to even begin rationalising what was going through my mind. “I’m gay.”

Which wasn’t, strictly speaking, wrong. I’d had fleeting attractions to the odd girl once or twice in my life, and even gone on a date with a classmate, but none had genuinely inspired the same warm, steamy feeling I felt the first time I hugged Hideyuki, back in 2015, when I first competed alongside him; we weren’t in the same school, but both of us were under Coach Fujine’s martial club. In the three months leading up to the championships that year, our two teams had trained alongside each other on Saturdays, and even though we were competitors (evident from the violent, almost beastly enmity with which both our sides seemed to view the others), that didn’t really stop me from interacting with Hideyuki. We weren’t even in the same weight category anyways (I was 58kg and he was 62kg), so any competition between the two of us was solely for school pride.

“Fuck school pride”, was how Hideyuki felt about it.

School pride never really had any need to get violated, for it was by a stroke of luck that both of us somehow ended up in the same high school the following year. The surprise written all over his face was matched by the hidden incandescence that suddenly rose from inside my belly, all the way up to my windpipe, in a way I’d never before experienced.

How my constant wandering thoughts about Hideyuki since that day had led to me unwittingly and spontaneously confessing my feelings for him on a Takadanobaba rooftop was something beyond my comprehension.

“You’re kidding”, said Hideyuki, grinning. His grin, though, was a lot less silly and clownish than it usually was. Like something was holding him back.

“N-no”, I added, suddenly in control of a body that had committed a crime without even knowing it. “I really… do…”

“You mean you-“

“It’s not that”, I protested wearily, knowing full well where that sentence was headed, my already ruddy cheeks flushing with steaming blood. “I hate the idea of doing the thing, but… but…”

I knew exactly what I wanted to say, but I was imprisoned by my language. No words could delicately and concisely explain what exactly it was I’d felt towards him since the beginning of the previous school year.

Hideyuki’s grin slowly faded. His teeth disappeared under the cover of his thin lips, surrounded all over by tan, golden skin, till his mouth had been curled into no more than the ghost of a smile, dreamy and reflective. His jet-black pupils, encircled by hazel irises, looked up into mine, and then his mouth slid back into a toothy gleam.

“Nice to know”, he said. It sounded sarcastic, but something about the way he gazed straight into my eyes convinced me otherwise.

Fatigue began to overcome me. The glowing in my chest, rather than subside from awkwardness, only waxed even further.

As he went back to his Instagram surfing, I slowly stretched out my legs and lowered myself, till my head was resting on Hideyuki’s torso sideways, my right cheek resting on his nicely-defined abdominal muscles which, unflexed, felt more like a medium-to-hard pillow than a washing board, as most people tended to describe abs. His body had a saline odour, but I didn’t care; it didn’t register at all.

So overwhelming was that gush of sauna water that engulfed my whole body, that for that one brief moment in time, it felt like everything in the universe had disappeared. No judo competition, no porno movies, no game-crazy mother. That the only things that existed were Ryuji Yamagata and Hideyuki Hayashi, intertwined like the symbiotic wires that made up a piano.

My moistened eyes could not hold out any longer. There was so much more I could have said that moment, so much more I wanted to say, but in the torrent of mellowness that I had suddenly been immersed in, all that slipped into warm, childlike oblivion.

“Love you, baby”, was all I could manage, as my eyelids began to succumb to the spell of sleep.

The last thing I remembered that night was Hideyuki, still lying down limply with his head on his pillow, chuckling softly and running his fingers through my hair.

“Love you too”, he added, as I slipped into warm slumber.

…

[the-eng-circle]

#raglisurf #sex_lies_n_tapes #judges_complaints It's 20.12, 5:th of March 2019 and I have to "go offline" (out of money) - but I will come back and describe what todays hockey-judges CAN'T do in other contestants trousers/cages... see you! (A few minutes later..) I had a donation for yet another hour - so I decided to write an hour on what this picimage (Obelix - in Hockey-EM) will show for/in my own sub-si-diary-supported memory-book/-blog for this Thur's (my own) day/trip in/through Hell... IRA (SWE) - "MON-DAY" It started with "a shake on one of the lower decks" (there'as only the big 'n' balded ones go) and an "intrusion" like Hitchcock show as a grimreaping experience in the old film called "Psycho" (steam-shower-pic-image) that became a "struggle" of ropes, wicks and a matter if you make/swear an oath to the dew (all "e-dew-ca-tors" know what I mean) or NOT... (think "Mountain Dew" here, the pubsong by "The clancy Brothers" - like "Whiskey in The Jar"). It was 'explosive' several times - a "nuclear blast in an aquarium-tank" (or "a tomb that had NOT heared enough sound") can name the "incident" - at nights with more "K" than most american presidents ever seen before in their military riddik-oulus night-vision goggles ("...you know what they awoken"...) . I call it an "IRA-bombing" of something else than a simple garbage-bin... it was a whole room (ga-rage-sized) that exploded when that "terrorist" pushed his button a few times - INSIDE my own hand/skin and with the words "Loves nature is no more!" following the repeated clicks with my shoemaker-thumb... one wrathful reaction of many was started that year with intrusions followed after another. The-y didn't succeeded with their breaking of my mind, but a research of my "brain-pattern" and testing of Love's limits were repeatedly coming back to my mind. You can see it as the X-Men's research-facility in Rivendell, a "Bjorn" were trying to make one of his guys a new skeleton... "baptism in a fiery aquarium-tank" and "hell-raising" with a negative facial-plate is another. "Gay-pigs!" Al Pacino cried to them who invaded his bodybuilding with black arts (or red/yellow "ants"). That period was the first hellraiser-attack, I call it "Mon-day" ("Mo" is a fine sand, heathen or "immoral music"/crickets for a Mose) and a "bath of roses", Rosenbath, the name on the swedish parliament was no garden of roses or "a rosegarden" promised from any lovable creature - it was a "piraya-stew" or fish-rince and gum everywere. Anyone that "entered my domain" was a "Jesus-whore", a "sacrifical-moral victim", a "backstabber" that refused to fight myself like a man. Another Volbeat song - "Pool of Booze, Booze, Booza". In Sweden anti-psychiatry and anti-anti-psychiatry (regular psychiatry) was having a IRA-terror-cell and I accuse Bin-Beaff for the repeated attacks at my homeshelter, bed and showerroom - the steam was sometimes hot and the volume noone can have any complaints about, it should've been heard what that homo-devil was diminished into (a nob must have been evesdropping in my surrounding). "He" wanted me to write that the kingdom of Sweden was in a "psychi-o-cratic coupe de'tat" - but I responded (loudly) with that "he" has to declare that himself... "-"She"'s always a woman to me", as Billy Joel would sing it. After I left my "snowy-mountain nord" I had a terrible Tuesday - I arrived in Spain in May and there ETA did wait, just to eat myself up... I had to change tactics... ...more to come... now this internet-store closes... ETA (ESP) - "TU-ES-DAY" Now, it's the day after the above written... here I can describe what happened in Spain (northern, the Basque-region), during the period of nine months 2017-2018 (May-Feb). The most abstract pattern is that I was drying "pieces of sheets" outdoors, in a "revolving parasollic form" as the "tor(-k)-ken" and it's movements can be called when you hang them in a villa's backyard. For nine months I was moving around in San Sebastian.... for nothing... no law, no protection from UN and it's so called "human rights", living on €3.00 in donations per day. And with all that can be read in what I written about these harrasments towards a Finbull's headoffice... with which at three "winters" the so called "Hell on Earth" are awoken. I write this in my third "winter-time" now. "Political abusement" is another "socialistic term" for the intrusions to a man's mind/home/economy. "Throwing rocks" is yet another to a "Sauna-father" who's done this before - you have to "love yourself" as Justin B sings... don't enter the Bear's domain as a "Bi-bear"... that's NOT enough in the "Holy War" (which of course is FOR love - NOT against it/him...it's always a man...it's all about manhood and it's several generation-shifts). The woman can only become a "pro-miss" in these war-battles out in the world - the war isn't FOR(e) her as a woman at all. I'm now in my wo-mb-fight - and that is the worst of "mothers" and "pro-misses"...it's a catfight, a dragon-ring and a lot of demons "attached" to such a board-game. Being the "B-ord" and turning a 5-masteras you becomes, all by yourself in full storm is a lot of things, ropes, strops, sail-cloths, decks, cargo-chests, keelhauls for self-service to your own fathership and holding on to your reality-conception all the time - needs a few "spanish salutes" from the different "canon-decks"... ...it is "fighting natural attacks" - that doesn't belong to yourself even. You're attacked by a ghostship that belongs to another. To resurrect the fathership when it's no where to be found, is a REAL "Hell on Earth-experience". All there is to offer as your self-help when it's a time of a "regressed reality by fantasies" (science-fiction rules the world-culture) is "self- (or forced-) medication". You need to be able to "create"... ...and to be a "turner of tides" you need alot of "lone-time" in your lifehistory, been recreative and re-schooled yourself into do it again - with words... against your own life-wishes or "free will". You're unvoluntarily put into a hell-mode and under a "scientific experiment" - which is the safest way of killing a rival to a leading "ideology/religion". I went atleast 40 000 steps DOWNWARDS in Donostia/San Sebastian, like in a spiral-staircase - for no use... ...EXCEPT for that of forcing the intruder of my helmet deep down (and out) into a "nether region" where "he" belongs. Like on a gyproc-screw, you then turn around the "wall" and take your household/bags and start walking north/upwards again... hopefully to a more language-friendly region (like british isles for my school english to be more understood) where "rule by law" exists. THAT was on the other hand a BIG/HUGE dissapointment later, in London, Great Britain. ...I come back and write some about my third experience, the NMR (Nordic Resistance Movement) and their "doings" here in Italy later - I have to "earn" some more euros to be able to "write something off my back" - it's rare to be able to write nowadays... it's costly (in comparison to wifi and my ex-mobilephones on cafès for example) - I now pay €1.50/hour just to be able to create some of what happends in the "italian ditch-warfare". It's VERY costly when you need both nurishment to your bodyfunctions and the ability to continously write the sub-si-diary-support online. Bye for now! NMR (ITA) - "WED-NES-DAY" Yet another day, "Giovedi" or "Thursday" as the english language call this week-day. It's 7:th of March and today I tell-us a little bit of the time in the third region of this hell-ride ("down-and-up") on what I also call "my day", Thur's-day - I, who have the "judge's hammer" of my own geographical region... and it's not a carpenting-hammer ("he" always want to remind myself of his personal presence). After the "football-experience" in Lille (before I left it) and the soccer-interests in London I declared myself belong more to the icehockey-region opf the world - something I understand is created after the "ability" or desire to "kick the ball" in "no-man's land", where "freedom of speach" is said t exist, but no laws can protect you instead. On the icehockey-arena I'm a headjudge (with the crystal-bowl-visir, sheriff-jacket/-sweater and the armbands for the experience of a true pinocchio-suit/slaugther-room-experiences). As NMR (Nordic Resistance Movement - the racistic resisitance movement upnorth they say) hit myself I will be the goalkeeper, the one that keep his goals - or "the goal-guard-ner" in my own "pocket" so to say - a region where other demand to become domain-owners. I have my small little garden (not a promised "rosegarden" that either - referring to a song from the past) and my two unique "horns" that I never "let down"... ...they're two "flank-men" that never will be forgotten, the posters that now have expanded to 4 x A3-newsposters. The wind on the other hand, have greater wishes to "overthrow the truth" now and then - but that's a homo-lordship with an addiction to the blue ring of wind (an "insider" without a parenthood projects it towards myself). As a "goalie" you "scratch the surface" on what is needed to say - as a true DJ - and the "barfights" are NOT attached to any elephant-nose (listen to the song attached below) - there's a "knife" to behead intrue-doers in a goal-guard-ner's own goalgarden... a knife in size of a mountain in branded clubs like "Mont-Real" or amed that "hoe" as in the "Ko-Ho"-branded one. Here in Italy, nazis has made their presence as the ones that NOT wish myself re-appear up north (in the "collectively unconscienseness") - they say in their "political pamfletts" they wish to "paternalise and send home" foreigners or those who NOT swear allegience to their "king" in parties like Swedish Democrats (SD) - or something like that. It's a constant struggle to "counter-strike" the negativity in swed-ish, "teleporting" (use of a homo-cahannel somewhere), telepathy and telekinesis - the different ways of make/control one as a "Pinocchio-doll"/"Pajas-suit" or being possessed with a homolord's ("king" Herod's) "royal dress", mentioned in the bible's Newer Testament. It's supposed to redicule you outside... ...I, on the other hand, is the one making the humour in my "given" suit - just to put the dolls inside to sleep... or to "night-quarter" them as I mentioned up in London's "Steward's Consession". I love unconditionally my homo-enemies until Death do us part.... that is my mission/purpose, as being a Charon on Styx over to Death's Hades and being "driven" as/into becoming a "chariot of/in fire" in psychiatry. Added 8 of March 2019: I am ONE with my "cage", the-y have put in an videocamera, exchanged the original headjudge (myself) with a newbie who has to go for the judges-booth and look at that old VHS-hitmovie named Sex, Lies and Videotapes... over and over again. This inlay/post was a part of my "complaints" on/to todays "judges" (or to "headjudge" himself) who these modern days aren't that skilled. Like nightly house-interragations by conquistadors from dark ages (tries to collect "wood" are made as branches in size of Harry P's "witch-finger" is called "kvistar" in swedish) - but this door is pretty stubborn as Burger King called it in a humorous way on their "PULL"-sign on their entrance door. Don't pull "Rope" himself though (like in english rope-pulling in a "pig-ditch" as battersea once were), he is from asia and sumo-wrestling in yet another "ring" isn't new to aesir-divinities from upnorth (N-ord) - they herritage from asia. I will say I "landed" in psychiatry back in old dungeon and dragon-times.... avading slavery in the nether regions - slavery is a temptation the "dragon ring" once have made a trio create, in their "wonderous" mechanical patterns. The western astrology's dragon-lure is the scorpio-weakness - let's take the old Bullfighter (the cowboy starsign) from an "unexpected angle" - why not "over his own head" and that poision a scorpio has go towards your head - and are filled with what is knows as black arts - black illnesses included. It's hell geting out of it - I say "good luck to you", these "injections" is now the new threat to the Earths populations - one pattern is to "run it off"... but that is my "unique horn" fighting Capricorn's "aid" to his "black lamb" in psychiatry - and to force that intru-der ("in-truth-dies" in swe) out of my head, where he definitively is UN-invited... those within UN who are believers of "scientism" or "to cut" or "divide" as an UN-conscious (or broken) conscience is, when "-science" is their only/solely conviction/religion. All these above is my "complaints" to above mentioned "headjudge" - who think he's snable-camera is wanted in every cage/chest everywhere. How (except a depletion of psychiatry as the (soft) gingerbread ringformed sugercake remind myself of - one of grandmother's favourites to serve and protect with at the swedish feeka-table from old times, a "Mount Doom-memory" that it's possible to remake) I would fix this I don't know... ...but some "markings" made by Fraud-O and his ring ("crop-circles" for myself as being on my Viking-sleighride at cold war-times) will be his own fault as Professional or "Specialist-" Doctor in state governmental psychological warfares. Even on old Roman grounds... doing some "final acts" according to "a manual" or "usual routines" when a Rudolf is "going down". And he himself NOT being a "clown-believer" - but the "Incredible Houdini" in his own so rest-raining-jacket... under my ice skating rink level. Then in his "mirror-image-world" of his own man/mouse-af-fair in a "sockel", in a house's ground or under the "stairway/stepstool" from another mother (JK Rowling's "adoptive one" maybe). Over and out! 250 Kg Kaerlek/Love - Naken/Nude https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHNcK7mglN4 LYRICS ENG I was iceskating beneath The Westbridge in belief that the ice was thick but so wasn't the case so I went down in a hole in the ice when I lay there and cried a dude came I cried to him "-Help me up!" but was not what he did. He undressed himself to nudity and jumped down into my "icy hole" And he said: -Oh, oh, it feels so good to be nude to swing the snable and "wag the dog" ...(more "transference" to come) LYRICS SWE Jag åkte skridskor under västerbron i tron att isen var tjock men det var den inte, så jag plumsa ner i en vak När jag låg där och skrek så kom en man Jag ropa "Hjälp mig opp!" men det gjorde inte han. Han klädde av sig naken och hoppa ner i vaken. Och sa: åh, åh vad det är skönt å va naken Svänga me snabeln och vicka pa baken En sommarkväll hade vårat gäng fest vid stadens simbassäng. Alla var glada, nakna och fulla. En del var faktiskt jättefulla. Men när vi tömde bassängen och fyllde på med isen för att kyla bärsen, ja då kom polisen. Och dom haffa miiig. Dom sa "Dig håller vi kvar, får vi höra ditt försvar?" jag sa: åh, åh vad det är skönt å va naken Svänga me snabeln och vicka på baken Jag åkte till Åland å handla sprit å då åkte jag dit i tullen Dom trodde visst jag var terrorist och letade långt upp i tarmen. Ett finger gick ju bra, men inte hela armen. Å dom hitta lite grann, så dom leta lite mer Så frågar dom varför jag står här och ler? Jag svara: åh, åh vad det är skönt å va naken Svänga me snabeln och vicka på baken åh, åh vad det ar skönt å va naken Svänga me snabeln och vicka på... Åhhh, åhh, åhhhhhh... Åh, åh vad det är skönt å va naken Svänga me snabeln och vicka på baken

[davedjhon1-blog]

Top Department Stores discount codes in UK

Art Voucher Codes March 2019: get 88% Off Art Discount Discount Code Today's favorite 11 artdiscount. Discount Code for March 2019:Get 88% Off . And there are 11 newest voucher codes at coupontoaster.co.uk Artificial Grass Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes . Artificial Grass GB is a trading name of Furnishings UK Ltd, a longstanding Yorkshire based company with over 35 years ... 50% off Aspire Diamonds Vouchers, Promo Codes, Discount Coupon ... Upto 50% off Aspire Diamonds Vouchers: Get verified Aspire Diamonds promo codes & deals at coupontoaster.co.uk 50% OFF AweBox Coupons 2019 | 20% Off SiteWide Code Huge list of AweBox coupons, coupon codes and special offers with free shipping offer are available at coupontoaster.co.uk 10% OFF Notice Boards Direct Discount Codes, Voucher Codes & Offers Get 10% off on noticeboards, whiteboards and display equipment just by adding notice boards direct promo code on your online order Save With BubbleBum Promo Code & Discount Offer March. 100% Verified BubbleBum Discount Codes UK. Save money with this exclusive BubbleBum promo codes, voucher code, deals online from coupontoaster.co.uk 20% OFF C.Scope Metal Detectors Coupon Code & Promo Get the latest and updated C.Scope Metal Detectors coupons, promos and voucher codes. Check coupontoaster.co.uk  to save money Cancer Care Parcel supporting Solving Kids' Cancer Cancer Care Parcel is offering a 5% discount to Solving Kids' Cancer supporters ... To claim your discount please use voucher code at coupontoaster.co.uk Cheap Beds Direct Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes ... . We specialise in quality manufactured Divan Beds, Mattresses, Divan Bed Sets & Headboards! Every week we sell .. 30% Off - A Gift From The Gods coupons, promo & discount codes ... Coupon codes, promos and discounts for agiftfromthegods. A Gift From The Gods. . We design heavenly sleepwear ... Circle One Coupons: 2019 Promo Codes - GetCouponCodes Get 3 available Circle One coupon codes, promo codes, discount and free shipping for 2019! 100% success. 15% OFF Clonezone Direct Voucher Codes, Discount Codes & Offers Shop from huge range of gay sex toys on coupontoaster.co.uk , just apply clonezone promotional code on your order to get 15% off plus free delivery over £25. Condom Outlet Coupons Feb. 2019: Coupon & Promo Codes Get free Condom Outlet coupon codes, promo codes & deals for mar. 2019. Saving money starts at coupontoaster.co.uk Up to 30% off Creased Cards Coupon, Promo Code for march 2019 1+ active Creased Cards coupons, promo codes & deals for mar. 2019. Most popular: 30% Off Orders. Daisy Baby Shop Promo Codes, New Online! - Promotional Codes With today's deals numbering 14 (& cheap or free delivery!) we'll help ensure you have the voucher code or promo that's best for your daisy baby shop Dealbuyer.com Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes DealBuyer offer the cheapest deals on a large range of goods, including TVs, Tablets, Laptops and more. Speedy next ... Up to 20% off Destiny Jewellery Coupon, Promo Code for march 2019 1+ active Destiny Jewellery coupons, promo codes & deals for mar. 2019. ... Free Swarovski Birthstone Earrings when you Spend Over £26 + Free UK Delivery. 40% OFF Dizzy Duck Designs Coupons Code & Promos - Discount ... Get the latest and updated dizzy duck designs coupons, promos and voucher codes. Check coupontoaster.co.uk  to save money 10% OFF - DJM Music Voucher Codes & Discount Codes - Deals Queen Save 10% on range of music instrument by applying voucher code at checkout, free delivery on bulk orders.. Free Delivery Door Handle Company Discount Voucher for march 2019 ... - Get Free Delivery at Door Handle Company with Discount Voucher for mar2019. Shop at coupontoaster.co.uk and Save 20% OFF Dragon Hockey Voucher Codes, Discount Codes & Offers Save 20% on range of carbon hockey sticks, hockey gloves, shin pads and stick bags just by applying dragon hockeyvoucher code Duty Free Crystal Discount Codes & Vouchers → March 2019 Save with these tested Duty Free Crystal Discount Codes valid in March 2019. Get the latest Duty Free Crystal Voucher Codes now Free Shipping Day 2019 Coupons: Best Discounts and Promo Codes ... Free Shipping Day 2019 coupons, promo codes and discounts at Target, Groupon, Walmart and more. Missing: esmaley ‎ Extra 10% OFF Evo Scooters Discount Codes, Voucher Codes Save upto 10% on electric bikes, mopeds, spare parts and accessories by applying evo scooters voucher code on your online UK order. 1 Executive-Shaving Coupons & Promo Codes | 20% Off Save up to 20% with these current Executive-Shaving coupons for March 2019. The latest ... Executive-Shaving.Coupon Codes. 20%. OFF. CODE ... Finnmark Sauna Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes - Finnmark Sauna is the home of the finest quality Finnish-made, Finnish-designed sauna equipment in the UK. We specialise in authentic ... Get 25% Off Gardening Naturally Discount Code more w/ Gardening ... Get extra percentage off with gardening-naturally Coupon codes March 2019. Check out all the latest gardening-naturally.coupons and apply them for ... Enjoy 50% off Greedy Lama Coupons & Promo Codes march 2019 Get 7 Greedy Lama coupon codes and promo codes at coupontoaster.co.uk. Click to enjoy the latest deals and coupons of Greedy Lama and save up to 50% Up to 60% off Packers Pro Shop Coupon, Promo Codes March, 2019 7 verified Packers Pro Shop coupons and promo codes as of Mar 1. Popular now: Sign Up for Packers Pro Shop Emails and Receive Special Offers and Deals. Up to 10% off Henryka Coupon, Promo Code for march 2019 1+ active Henryka coupons, promo codes & deals for march. 2019. Most popular: Henryka Discount Codes: 10% Off Your Order. Holden Coupon Codes & Promo Codes 2019: 15% off Today's best: 15% off any order | Holden - 11 Promo Code Housemakers Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes . Housemakers is a regional home & garden retailer, selling everything from Premium Branded Electricals like Kitchenaid . 50% off Impress Gadgets Vouchers, Promo Codes, Discount Coupon ... Upto 50% off Impress Gadgets Vouchers: Get verified Impress Gadgets promo codes & deals at coupontoaster.co.uk. 25% Off Dr Infrared Heater Promo Codes | Top 2019 Coupons ... Dr Infrared Heater Promo Codes & Coupons for February, 2019 Save with 3 active ... Today's Top Deal: Save 25% and get free shipping. ... instock.net Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes . InStock is a specialist online department store selling a wide variety of products including Electronics, Books, Movies, Games ... instruments4music Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes ...- Instruments4music provides value for money products without ... e.g Voucher codes, student discount, staff discount; If you pay for your ... Ipanema Footwear Discount Code for march 2019 - llll➤ Ipanema Footwear discount codes for marxh 2019 ✅ Verified and tested voucher codes ✅ Get the cheapest price and save money coupontoaster.co.uk. Lakeland Furniture Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes | ... Lakeland Furniture specialises in reproductions of modern design classics as well as carrying an extensive range of .. Lock and Key Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes -  The Lock and Key Centre are one of the UK's largest independent locksmith & security equipment companies established 50% off LoveTwoo Coupons: 2019 Promo Codes - GetCouponCodes Get 3 available LoveTwoo coupon codes, promo codes, discount and free shipping for 2019! 100% success. Meditas Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes Meditas the home of SleepPro products are leaders in the design, development, manufacture and distribution of ready made ... Get MicroBarBox Discount Code and Promo voucher Online .../ 100% Verified MicroBarBox Discount Codes UK. Save money with this exclusive MicroBarBox promo codes, voucher code, deals online from coupontoaster.co.uk 40% Off Mitre For Home Discount Code, Voucher Codes, Promo Code ... Garden; Mitre For Home. Mitre For Home Discount Vouchers Codes ... Up to 45% off Table Linen Items at Mitre for Home. Save 15% with Mystic Moments Uk Voucher Codes, Discount Codes ... Get 15% off on range of essential oils, carrier oils & massage oils just by applying mystic moments promotional code on your order plus free delivery over £15. 25% off Nina Campbell Coupons: 2019 Promo Codes Get 4 available Nina Campbell coupon codes, promo codes, discount and free shipping for 2019! 100% success. 5% Off NordicTrack Discount Code, Voucher Codes, Promo Code Get Nordic Track discount voucher codes & latest promo codes from TVC & get thrifty shopping discount codes, avail free delivery codes via our portal and save ... 50% Off Norfolk Socks Voucher Codes & Deals march 2019 Look after your feet for less with Norfolk Socks discount vouchers. Save on cycling, heathcare, sports and kids socks with our Norfolk Socks promo codes. 50% off Normans Musical Instruments Vouchers, Promo Codes ... Upto 50% off Normans Musical Instruments Vouchers: Get verified Normans Musical Instruments promo codes & deals at coupontoaster.co.uk 20% Off Verified Onlynaturals Voucher codes & Discount Codes 2019... Click here to get the 14 verified Onlynaturals Voucher codes & Discount Codes. Today's verified coupon can save you 20% off. Don't miss! Plus Watches Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes | - Watches. Plus Watches are an online retailer offering their customers up to 50% off Branded and Fashion watches.. 30% OFF Prestige Vaping Discount Codes, Voucher Codes & Deals Up to 30% off on the range of premium electronic cigarette and E Liquid just by applying prestige vaping discount code on your order plus free delivery over £30 20% Off - Pretty You London coupons, promo & discount codes ... Get prettyyoulondon.coupon codes, discounts and promos including 20% off and 15% discount. Find the best discount and save! 10% OFF Redbus Cartridges Discount Codes, Voucher Codes & Deals Are you looking for original and recycled toner and ink cartridges for your laser or inkjet printer then checkout redbuscartridges also use redbus cartridges ... Rock n Roll Marathon Series Coupons, Promo Codes march 2019 3 verified Rock n Roll Marathon Series coupons and promo codes as of Feb 28. Popular now: Check Out Current Promotions Section Today! Rugs Direct 2U Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes Carpets Direct 2U, a well established, family owned and run flooring specialist business is based in the West Midlands ... Shmuncki Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes Shmuncki specialise in beautiful gifts, boxed and delivered with a personalised message. We have a range of personalised ... 25% OFF Simply Safes Discount Codes, Voucher Codes & Offers Shop from range of security safes, gun safes, fire safes, deposit safes through simply safes promotional code and get 25% off plus free delivery on all orders. Sir Gordon Bennett Discount Codes, Sales, Cashback Offers & Deals ... Save money at Sir Gordon Bennett with our cashback & discount codes. Simply click through to Sir Gordon Bennett and shop as normal and we'll send a portion 50% The British Belt Company Promo Codes, Free Shipping Voucher ... The British Belt Company discount codes for 40% OFF are issued by this store for Limited Time. You can use these Voucher codes to get upto 70% discount in ... 20% OFF The Green Welly Stop Discount Codes, Promo Codes ... Get 20% on whisky, gifts and outdoor clothing just apply the green welly stop voucher code on your order plus free delivery over £75. 35% OFF The Rug Shop Voucher Codes, Discount Codes & Promo ... Get maximum discount on various types of high-quality rugs at most ... The Rug Shop Discount Code ... Therugshopuk.Vouchers & Deals march 2019. 5% Off The Rug Shop Discount Code, Voucher Codes, Promo Code The Rug Shop discount voucher codes, online discounted deals and promo codes are available at Top Vouchers Code to help you save your hard earned .. £5 OFF The Vegan Kind Discount Codes, Voucher Codes & Coupons Save up to £5 on various types of beauty & lifestyle gift boxes by adding the vegan kind promo code at checkout plus free delivery over £60. Transparent Communications Voucher Codes - March 2019 ... Transparent Communications Discount Codes March 2019. Check Out The Best Free Delivery Coupons And Vouchers For Transparent Communications Trinca-Ferro Cashback, Voucher Codes & Discount Codes Trinca-Ferro offers a stunning selection of ceramic, glass, acrylic and ... any other offer, voucher or discount code unless listed on this page, .. 30% OFF Twelve Green Bottles Voucher Codes, Discount Codes ... Checkout twelvegreenbottleswine. for green bottles wine, great quality wine at affordable prices. Get 30% off by using twelve green bottles voucher code ... 10% OFF Victoria Green Voucher Codes, Discount Codes & Offers Shop wash bags and cosmetic bags for women from top brands at victoriagreen.co.uk. Also don't forget to use victoria green voucher code updated in %month .... Enjoy 50% off Wickman & Co Custom Candles Coupons & Promo ... Get 5 Wickman & Co Custom Candles coupon codes and promo codes at coupontoaster.co.uk. Click to enjoy the latest deals and coupons of Wickman & Co Custom ..

[twistednuns]

June 2017

A day with Mama. She visited me in Munich for the first time and (after picking up my Russian visa) we spent a sunny day at Hofgarten, the Korean beauty store, ate ramen noodle soup and ice-cream at Ballabeni. We need to do that more often!                                                                                             

Watching smoke wavering and wafting in the sunset. Beautiful shapes.

Going to Maike’s birthday party, very spontaneously. I enjoyed the company of quick-witted, intelligent film journalists - culturally knowledgeable and eloquent. I need more people in my life who can teach me something. Who challenge me.

The school theatre performance. The kids were so nervous but so good. They can often do and be so much more than we assume.

Clearing out the furnace - I love the transformation of the glazing in the heat and the first look at the sculptures after opening the door. I usually annoy the hell out of Doris by asking if the oven is cool enough yet to open it because I just can’t wait. So impatient.

We had a lot of fun with FaceApp at the board game night (it takes your picture and transforms you into a child, a wo/man or makes you really old and wrinkly - I look pretty much like my dad as a dude and my mum looks liker her uncle) and played Tokaido and AnnoDomini.

Ryan Adams recorded a whole cover album of Taylor Swift’s 1989! And I just found out about this! Of course I had to listen to Shake it Off first.

Marteria - Das Geld muss weg / Alt-J - In Cold Blood (a hymn for coding?)

Pretty shelves.

Walking home from the tube in the middle of the night, watching a young couple kissing behind the bicycles.

Michi told me I was beautiful. Or, well, at least he said that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my face.

And personally I also think that I look pretty cute in panties and a tank top.

Wow. Next month I’m gonna have 6 years worth of Things I Love lists.

Taking pictures on the balcony with Lena and Lexi. All of us wearing summer dresses. A beautiful étagère with strawberries (Sash is a good étagère model), blueberries and Raffaellos. Unlimited birthday pizza. A good talk with Michi. Soap bubbles. Starting to deal books (graphic novels are a hit at the moment and I borrowed a Murakami and Ronja Räubertochter).

Beautiful caramel pumpkin seed twix bars.

A firefly with a big green butt, spotted from my balcony one night.

Germany legalizing gay marriage.

Reading about Saturn return.

Ralf Nietmann (@Rosaistschlecht) - effortless and gorgeous… can I ever make art like that?

Travelling around the Baltic sea with Mohana. Here are some happy memories:

Helsinki: Going to the sauna on a nasty, particularly cold and rainy day; swimming in the sea pool afterwards / Karhu huurre (preferrably in the sunset on an outside-sofa because why the hell not) / Swedish subtitles everywhere / the picture-perfect trip to Suomenlinna / drawing on the ferry, in our window in Tallinn, on a rock in Suomenlinna / riding a proper ferry for the first time - might me one of my favourite means of transport actually / Tove Jansson’s wall art and the fact that she sneaked her lesbian lover into the paintings / white nights, empty streets in almost-daylight at 2am / sunset over the Töölö waters, Sibelius park / Daim ice-cream with liquorice / Nidar Smash (basically Bugles covered in chocolate, SO GOOD) / a nice long-haired dude with an “Eat Pussy not Animals” T-Shirt //

Tallinn: Lilac bushes everywhere / a street food market, truffle popcorn, candy sticks, lobster rolls / a spontaneous visit to a burlesque show - the lady dancing in hoofs to Rammstein was rad / having a sundowner on the rooftop of some mall / buying a bunch of lilies of the valley from an old lady / an afternoon at the Baltic Sea, having Russian ice-cream cones at the beach //

St. Petersburg: meeting Gaio and Stefan, practising my French / Karaoke with Julia, Veronika and the Swiss - the Russians were SO good though / visiting a cat café with ex-employees from the Heremitage / Etazhi project / a canal tour / pierogi and borsht //

Many northern souvenirs: dresses from Other Stories and H&M, a Suomenlinna poster, earrings, Mumin merchandise, an “Art is Popcorn for the Brain” tote bag from Helsinki Art Museum.

Voice messages from Anika.

Panama Plus festival at Kreativquartier! Seeing Pollyester and Ankathie Koi live. Meeting MONSIEUR!!! (Simon M.) Seeing Markus again, almost a year after meeting in Berlin for the first time. A book flea market. Craft beer. Stealing a poster from AskHelmut. A VERY pretty drummer.

Food writing - for example everything ever written by Ruth Reichl, Sweetbitter by Stephanie Danler or this article by Bee Wilson. I think food writing might be one of my true passions, just like gender equality, for example.

Meeting (seeing) Sofia Coppola at Filmfest München - she gave an hour-long interview on her new movie The Beguiled. I also saw Fatih Akin that evening and Horst Seehofer after having a good time with Lexi, Maike and her friend at the beergarden on Wiener Platz.

A dream: Kilian and Ashley handstitched grey pearls onto my legs after waking up on big commputer/machine bed.

Franzi and Ralf’s wedding. It was a beautiful evening, I got my Patronus beer tag, everyone was so pretty. I loved the little speeches they gave for one another.

[talenlee]

Game Pile: Gay Sauna: The Board Game

I love board games. I love that you can make board games about anything. I love that you can make board games about the same thing. I love that you can take the mechanics of Dominion and repeat on it a dozen times and that’s different every time and it’s still a game. Game rules are these beautiful gaseous forms of art that you can run your hands through and create shimmering trails of rainbows. There are so many train games building on one single period of history we’re running out of dates to set them in.

Board games are amazing.

Anyway this is a board game called Gay Sauna: The Board Game. It’s about going to a gay sauna.

I don’t actually intend to go into too much juciy detail here but I still want to provide a Content Warning. This is a game about gay sex in a public shared location. This includes a lot of information about gay cultural intersection and its common lexicon but also that means we’re going to talk about dongs and butts and things that go into and come out of and come over those dongs and those butts. Okay? If you’re not ready for a former Churchboy to talk as awkwardly as possible about gay sex stuff, you shouldn’t read this article.

I think this game is interesting! I think it’s interesting in how it seems to be reasonably well designed and really willing to be honest and vulnerable about its subject matter! But again, go into this being mindful of what you’re about to read.

First up, the players have gathered at a Gay Sauna, they get a persona to play, their own individual player board, some horniness tokens and then the Sauna is filled out with spaces where people can go, hang out, and meet people.

And then, in those places, you find people you want to try and bang.

Each encounter has compatibilities and optimal strategies. Each individual player has unique needs – you don’t choose them, they’re dictated by the game at random at the start – and then players spend their time, on their turns either preparing for a big turn later (haha) or taking targets in as optimal a way they can with their starting resources.

In its purest sense, Gay Sauna: The Board Game is a dungeon crawler. You’re all in a closed space, you get to choose targets and encounters based on what’s best for you and what’s best for other players, and then you roll some dice to see how good a job you do getting close to them, and then you get to roll based on how good a job that went. Then there’s rewards (or possible penalties!) based on how that encounter resolves and then, based on how well you’re doing, you recover or you consolidate your advantage and pursue more advantages. Players acquire stuff to make them better at future encounters, they choose encounters based on opportunity and availability – wanting to make sure that other players don’t take things they want – and the whole process is then modulated through random chances based on dice results.

And this is a game where there’s a lot of conversation about opportunity and availability. Characters have specific preferences, they have types they’re into, and those types are expressed through the art and stance of the characters. Instead of a chest or a slime or an ogre or a bear, you’re talking about a slimy otter or a chesty bear, and the encounters are deliberately one-on-one —

Er, wait, there are in fact ways to get multiple partners at a time, but that’s okay, because you have to satisfy all of them. Rolls could go badly for you.

Real high risk, high reward there.

Ironically, one of the things about this game that stands apart of its genre of dungeon crawlers, is that it’s got an actual reason for the players to be competing: because the characters are competing. The characters are friends, they came here to get laid, and they are all keeping track of who in that night they get to be with first. The game even specifies that sloppy seconds don’t count; other encounters might be happening, but characters are focusing on each characters’ first time.

I haven’t played this game. I did want to, as a matter of writing this article. When I started this year I imagined I’d be able to find a copy reasonably conveniently, with its successful kickstarter. Turns out, nope, not in any of the conventions or game libraries I saw. Made sense of course – after all, this is an adult-audiences game and the conventions I’ve gone to have been all-ages.

Which is part of it.

Part of this game’s theme is a thing that dictates how and where it can be played. It is a game whose whole frame

This isn’t to tritely point out how we culturally dismiss rough gay sex and anal fisting when actually, we tolerate representations of colonialism and isn’t that so much worse. Like yeah, duh, that’s a known thing, it’s a very present cultural affect. We know that depictions of violence, especially extremely abstracted violence, are permissable. The violence of capitalism is part and parcel of so many games. It’s boring to even point out that hey, isn’t it funny we can do slavery but not rimjobs in games?

That’s not the point. That’s a social norm that you should be familiar with at this point because part of it is how the game presents those things. Rather, that this game is a dungeon crawler about doing something where you are meant to want to do the thing. The acts have inherent enjoyable meaning. The violence of a dungeon crawler is rarely specific, rarely realistic, rarely meant to be real or feel real. You revel in the challenge and the overcoming, you revel in the risk, but the actual experience of sliding a sword into the meaty body of a zombie is not itself meant to be deeply satisfying.

We are not often taught, in games, to love processes as much as we are taught to strive for results.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[defunctblogtobedeleted]

8/26/17, 4:31pm - Some Kinda Closure

gonna actually try to write this time.

So I had no patients for tuesday, but my boss let me work during the day to cover the hours. What that meant is that I worked 18 hours straight on a day where I told my buddy Jwilli that he could stay at my place and that I’d want to take him out for karaoke. Couldn’t manage to take a nap and proceeded to have the longest fucking day of my life. Bustered out in bracket and got bummed out, went to hang out with Angie and convinced her to come out to karaoke with us. Smoked on the back patio of the bar with these randos (I fucking love greensboro sometimes), told a bunch of stupid jokes and bounced to this bar closer to my house with Josh, the queen I met last time. Turns out him and angie already knew each other. So I’m meeting a bunch of his friends (couldn’t possibly tell you any of their names now), get in this big hissyfit argument with this girl friend of his who said she was pansexual, and when I described myself as biflexible she said that it was disgusting and that I just wanted to get laid when I was drunk. All I could say was pretty much, yeah, i mean who doesn’t want to get laid when they’re drunk. Plus I don’t wanna tease gays by saying I’m really bi that’s not fair lol. She tried to convince me that since I felt some attraction to men sometimes that you might as well call it bi and I was like “well that’s silly that’s like everyone should just be pansexual then.” Idk the conversation didn’t end up with us fighting so that’s good. Luckily drunk me has that trollish charm that people can just slide anger off of lmfao. After we popped by Josh’s a sec we were gonna go to another party but Jack and Angie were tired, so I took them home and had some great drunk sex. That was the last I’d see of Angie. After this trip she ended up breaking things off a few days ago.

But things with her were a little wonky, yknow? Like she wasn’t too confident in her appearance and was always confused that I’d flirt and say things like “i’m not someone to lust after.” I guess she was kinda right, I wasn’t overly excited about her appearance as much as her personality, but it’s a shame. I had encouraged her to pick up this second job that was more like what she wanted to do with her life, she got it no problem, but got doubly busy so I’m assuming she just became too adulty and didn’t really have time for me. Or whatever it doesn’t really matter, it’s nice having someone break things off and not feel bad about it.

Between her telling me I’m sexy as fuck and all these gay guys hitting on me all the time I’m pretty confident in how I look again lol. Not overly confident, I still wanna cut all this silly gold hair off now and maybe tone up a bit but not enough that I actually care to do anything about it lmaooo.

/

So anyway, that weekend was the annual delta sig reunion. Really happy that my boss switched my shifts so that I could go. It was probably the best thing that could’ve happened to me. Getting to bro out with everyone and share music with Nic and talk about Kailey stuff with Tato and Dakota and drunkenly bro with everyone up on the rooftop was amazing. We got fucking plastered playing drinking games, it was incredible. Got some great pics, but ofc I don’t share my pics with anybody lol.

The catch with the alumni weekend though was that Kailey was coming to spend the day with Jacober on day 2. So at first I was the tiniest bit salty. She shows up at the pool party and acts like I don’t exist at first, of course. And she looks as incredible as ever. So I pour myself into drinking, play the pokemon drinking board game with everyone, catch up with everyone. Hung out in the sauna cooking myself and drinking it was excellent lmao. We ended up talking a bit and I found out she’s got a great new job lined up making twice as much money as me right out of college and is doing well, so that’s good.

The best way to describe our relationship now is that we’re strangers who happen to know each other very well. I like that description a lot.

There was this great moment where I’m like drunkenly sulking by the poolside and this fat chick that one of the younger brothers had brought walks up to me. She says “did you mean to dye your hair that color?” I say “yeah, I wanted it like yellowish gold.” and she just says “well it’d look better if you’d dye it lighter.” and I just say “well you’d look better if you lost some fucking weight.” bahahahaha. She got that it was just a rib and playfully kicked at me, but I was at That level of not giving a fuck from the whole ordeal. Took a great group pic and I laid around sunning in my supreme hat and Griff told me that “I looked like a rapper.” I think that means he thinks i’m cool, i took it as high praise lmao.

 So we leave the lake house and I’m heading home with tato and dakota, Conner asks “where are jacober and kailey?” and I like mutter “well I don’t give a shit.” and he laughed and just says “hah I caught that.” So Dakota and Tato are like trying to get my feelings out of me because all I’ve said about anything is that and when tato had asked if I was gonna be ok with kailey being there I loudly and overexcitedly (intentionally in order to express my sarcasm) Oh yeah it’s fucking great.  It’s hard to describe. I’m like feeling great and having a good time with everyone, but fading in and out of this state of like salty disdain with everything. And tato can clearly pick up on this, so he’s trying to cheer me up by talking to the uber driver.

The uber driver tells us about how he’s ubering to make some extra money to take care of his kids since a divorce, but that now he’s in this wonderful relationship with this girl that he loves. So tato’s like “see? Things get better.” So he starts asking about more details and like this guy’s story is nutty. His first wife leaves him, he starts dating this girl from high school who has a few daughters and after like a year of dating and living together one day she up and leaves and takes all of his shit and maxxes out a bunch of credit cards in his name. And even though they weren’t married the court rules in her favor that he has to pay for all of it. So that’s why he’s really ubering on the side. And the girl he loves works night shift and he works day shift AND they’re long distance so they don’t get to see OR talk to each other much. So i just come out of the uber shaking my head and joking like “damn, with a life like that when do you just like call it quits?” Like suicide isn’t funny i guess, but god damnnnn hahahahah. 

So the three of us bro out in the dorm rooms we’re staying at, and I open up a little bit about feeling inadequate and about that time of my life being over and whatnot. And tato was just like “yeah well she was too young for you anyway.” So I hrmphed that, but I knew what he meant, because the split really was because that time of my life was just ending. So it led to this realization that a lot of my depression and feelings for kailey were all just tied up in this post-college doldrum nostalgia. Good to finally realize that that’s normal. College is cool, adulthood sucks, it’s nothing to sit and cry about. So that was part 1 of moving on.

We proceed to get drunk and high on the rooftop again that night. I’m flirting with this girl grace, we’re all hanging out topless (girls have bras on) playing this game piccolo and drinking. Kailey and Jacober and a few people are still hanging around. Her and Jacober kiss and I call out gayyyyyyyy and she gets all defensive saying how yeah it IS gay because she’s really happy. All I could think was that I’m glad she’s happy, but you’ve missed the joke lmao. Shrugged off that response. So later people are starting to drift off, and Kailey and I finally got a few words with her one on one while we smoked a joint together, but we didn’t really say much. She told me she didn’t like my hair either but I didn’t really give a fuck. She talked about how much she hated when people got in the way of her getting high and I thought about that girl I just broke things off with and how they really did sound exactly the same.  Then have one of the best one on one talks with Jacober that I’ve ever had. We talked about our dads and life a little bit. I really fucking love that guy he’s so damn nice lmao. He goes to grab something for Kailey and like skips away and me and Kailey say at the same time “what a cuuuutey.” Then she looked at me almost frustrated like I was making fun of her until she saw that I was being genuine? Idk I was a little drunk and high who knows how reliable a narrator I really am, but this is how I remember it. 

Then I’m hanging out with gus and his friend singing out frank ocean jams, until his friend starts crying about how his friend died. I say whoooo ok i’ve gotta go and tag along with jacober and kailey as we leave the roof. Don’t really remember talking about anything of importance, just said goodbye when we got to our rooms and said to have a good night. Like I said, strangers who know each other really well. But like all of it, her just being salty and negative reminded me that I was better off. So part 2 of moving on.

In the morning Dakota Tato Jack and I went to bojangles and joked about a bunch of shit before peaceing out. Really was a fucking great weekend.

[saunagame]

Gay Sauna the Board Game

The hot and steamy board game adventure where you score points, by scoring guys!

[saunagame]

Gay Sauna the Board Game

The hot and steamy board game adventure where you score points, by scoring guys!

[saunagame]

Gay Sauna the Board Game

The hot and steamy board game adventure where you score points, by scoring guys!

[saunagame]

Gay Sauna the Board Game

The hot and steamy board game adventure where you score points, by scoring guys!