twistednuns

[twistednuns]

František Kupka, Amorpha, Warm Chromatics, 1912. o-c, 105 x 105 cm, Meda Mladek coll. // source: IG @sandrokopp

[twistednuns]

Making C. happy by giving him a massage slathered in coconut oil. Inviting Franzi to help me.

Leaving quickly on Sunday. Stopping for our first outdoor ice-cream of the year. Eating it in the sunshine, sitting outside the ice-cream parlor.

Bathing together.

Finding a huge box of Sennelier soft pastels for half the price.

Watching a Sternstunde Philosophie talk with Marina Abramović.

Spending a few days in my own apartment for a change. I feel rather nomadic these days. It's nice to have all my belongings around me but I also notice how much they're weighing me down. I get sucked into a very stagnant energy.

Cooking my favourite sour curry with all the vegetables. Trying fermented tofu for the first time. Delicious.

NYX Lip I.V. - such a nourishing lip product (and I got it in a brownish 90s shade)

One of the best food combinations: Gruyère and strawberries.

Reading a whole book in two days. With my new clip-on reading light. Game changer.

Alkaline porridge with sea salt, roasted almonds and berries. Breakfast dessert.

Variations of a super easy and healthy lentil loaf! Veggie-packed and low carb. (I've been cooking and baking every day since I'm back in my apartment)

Surprising myself with good paintings (the trick is to make it through the ugly stage).

Spring cleaning.

Dinner with Becky. As always. One of the most wonderful human beings I know.

A cheap insider deal for a leather handbag.

Discovering an intricate origami dragon sitting on top of the emergency break on the subway.

A night out with C. Deep talk with Olivier (about Surreal art, feminism, Louise Bourgeois and the Guggenheim in Bilbao, the difference between coaching and therapy, IFS constellations and parts work). Ending up at Corleone, talking to a few people outside. Happily holding each other in bed. Also cute: when he was a little sad because I bought heeled platform shoes. So I let him wear them so he could be taller than me for once (we're almost the same height).

Casually fantasizing about renting a studio near C.'s house. Making it a studio/café/event room/store. I LOVE this idea. Putting it out there. Listen up, Universe <3

I also love my vision of my life at the art academy. Being exposed to radical, subversive avant-garde ideas. Discussing everything with C. Going to bizarre and eccentric happenings and parties together.

Mini burrata.

A super quick and easy read for a change.

When C. came into the room all excited, bit into a huge strawberry and announced that it was the biggest one he'd ever eaten.

Supporting a crowdfunding campaign for Munich's first Lesbian Bar - I chose the tier with the sticker pack: "Lesbians eat WHAT...?" Meow!

Spending some time alone with Marcus. Getting to know each other a little. Meeting his adorable cats. Enjoying his much calmer energy (compared to C.)

Initiating a mediation for L. and S. Telling her I'd be her lawyer. What a nice thing to have as a little girl. I wish I'd had one too. Perhaps I can take on this role for my own inner little girl as well.

C. and M. picked up my bike for me. I didn't have to move one finger!

Lots of feline cuddles.

People keep telling me that they admire the way I move. Perhaps it's time to believe them? I'm a dancer!

Being reminded of my passion for roasted sesame. I immediately bought one of the Gomasio mills they had at the seminar house.

The transformational Inanna seminar. Meeting so many interesting personalities. I see myself in many of them. In Cordula, who loves art and fashion design and unearthed her pink girl dreams. In Petra, who never believed she was good enough either and ended up with an eating disorder like me. In Astrid: anxious and dignified, freaky but reserved. In Martin, who also needs a few days to thaw. In Aline with her incredible connection to the invisible realm. Her receptivity to the subtle messages of the ether. Her soft, warm strength and compassion. In Dore, who feels like an older version of me. My future potential. A wise woman. Almost. And she already lives in my dream house in the forest - a vision that keeps showing up. Sonja, who used to be a teacher as well. She's fierce and provoking. Soft and warm and enthusiastic.

Dancing with my sadness. Receiving a message: I am free. I am loved.

Resurrection after 16-hand-massage.

Walking the first steps on my very own golden life line after A. told me unexpectedly that I used to have a twin and I'm currently on his path. Hugging and cuddling and eye gazing. It felt natural with her. Even to ask her for permission to put my forehead on hers.

Learning that a lack of control can also be called freedom.

Realizing that I have a huge problem with self-sabotage. There's a part of me that keeps me small and immobile. Apathetic. Tired. Cuts off my energy supply. Doesn't believe in me. Is afraid of failure AND success. Because it expects both outcomes to be painful or exhausting.

Emptiness contains everything.

Following the urge to hop out of bed and dance to the Village People one morning.

Realizing the daffodils I bought were actually white! A pleasant surprise.

Maisons du Monde, plant center and delicious Indian food with Margit.

Waking up before sunrise. Going for a long walk through the forest. Saying good morning to strangers instead of ignoring them. Picking up trash along the way. Working on my posture. Feeling a little sad. Welcoming it. Realizing that my favourite time outside is right before the street lights turn on/off. I also went past a window decorated with Happy Birthday bunting and it looked like a mother was busy preparing a birthday table for her child. Heartwarming.

Starting my new journal. Making it my own. Collages, art, dried ferns...

A day at the art academy. Shopping at Muji. Sexy silly social gathering in the evening.

The mango exceeded expectations.

Running an oil stick over a huge canvas. The start of a new painting.

C. brought me earrings from Gran Canaria! Is this the first time I got jewellery from a man?

Waking up next to each other.

Helping the kids make clay pots. I loved seeing how calm it made them at first (but then upset because the result wasn't perfect...)

A tiny Japanese food tour with Lena and Sash: Matcha Orange and matcha cheesecake with a savoury tasting menu at Tushita tea house. Museum 5 Kontinente. Delicious ramen in mushroom broth. Taiyaki fish waffles for dessert. And then we saw "Doping" at Kammerspiele. My first time at the theatre this year!

[twistednuns]

André Masson. Meditation on an Oak Leaf. 1942

[twistednuns]

"AUTOMATIC DRAWING" ANDRÉ MASSON | PARIS, 1924 [ink on paper | 9 1/4 x 8 1/8"]

André Masson began automatic drawings with no preconceived subject or composition in mind. Like a medium channeling a spirit, he let his pen travel rapidly across the paper without conscious control. He soon found hints of images—fragmented bodies and objects—emerging from the abstract, lacelike web of pen marks. At times Masson elaborated on these with conscious changes or additions, but he left the traces of the rapidly drawn ink mostly intact.

[twistednuns]

Dante and Beatrice gaze upon the Highest Heaven, the Empyrean — Gustave Doré (1850)

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“Brancusi’s Studio, Paris” ⬣ Where stone meets brass under industrial skylights

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[twistednuns]

Liang Fu (Chinese, 1993) - Reflections of Nothing (2024)

[twistednuns]

Bush, Konstantin Korobov

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“Untitled” by Mimmo Paladino ◆ Long arms stretch wide, each hand gripping a face

[twistednuns]

Bacchus und Ariadne by Domenico Fiasella

[twistednuns]

February 2025

Dinner and cuddles with C. Watching a movie in bed.

Therapeutic boxing.

Painting a life-size map of my body in Art Therapy. And grounding myself through intuitive painting. Flow.

Visions. Reaching a meditative state after feeling dissociated for a while. The sudden insight that it's all about energy and attitude (which can also mean posture in German).

New gadgets: a visual timer (a cute one with clouds and rainbows) and a tiny reading light.

A huge art supply haul from Boesner.

Late night conversation with Maria. She's easy to be with.

Marion said that my free dance moves inspired her to start dance therapy!

Sauna and cold water plunges in Bad Aibling. Snacking in one of the nest chairs. I call them Kuschelmuschel. Hanging out in the outdoor pool under the full moon in Leo, talking to C.

Hugging Maria when she reappeared from her room after a few sick days. I even checked in on her one night to see how she was doing and to tell her that I missed her.

The guy who slipped a pack of candy into my hand at the supermarket checkout.

Delivering little presents to Leah's doorstep.

Vöslauer sparkling water with raspberry flavor.

Physio therapy with Mrs. K. She's got the magic touch.

Talking with Lea and Anne during our walks. Breakfast with Christian. He just invited himself to my table. I love it when people help my a little with my social awkwardness by being straightforward and open.

The herons flying in during sunrise with the almost-full moon still shining bright in the background. Seems like more and more birds are joining in each morning.

Delicious Korean food in an unexpected place. C. got dressed up for Valentine's Day and even treated me to dinner.

All the people who stopped and asked me if I needed help when I was standing on a lonely road with my warning lights blinking after an accident with a deer.

Joking with Robert. I love people you can be silly with.

A Sunday at Filzhof. Cooking together. A Spotify jam session. Playing Photosynthese with Tobi. Operating a tiny piece of glass out of Markus' foot. Being extra cuddly and lovey-dovey with C.

Walking up to a paddock. A horse saw me and came to the gate. Allowed me to pet it. I just freakin' love animals. Usually I pet a cat when I walk past that particular farm but this time I got a horse instead!

Going to the cinema alone. Feeling a few feels.

A lovely, extra-long massage.

Talking about life, the universe and everything with my therapist. Feeling seen.

The items people put in my imaginary suitcase to say goodbye. Things like a sword. Time. An anchor. And a safe, loving space.

I asked Erika about a really cool vase in her greenhouse and she told me I could "borrow" it and she wouldn't be mad if I didn't return it!

Going to the cinema alone. Eating popcorn. Watching a movie about patriarchal structures. Feeling something. Rage. Compassion. A reminder that I tend to act in an anti-feminist way myself sometimes. And often lack female solidarity. I feel more comfortable being one of the dudes. I want to change that.

HOWEVER, I felt a little honored to be accepted as one of the dudes when C.'s friends were visiting him for the weekend. One of these balance things I guess...

Shopping in the men's department. Much better quality!

Watching my favorite French summer movie with my boyfriend. And he absolutely adored it, too!!

My last full day at the clinic was very insightful. I added the energy centers to my body silhouette and had a really good talk with M. about it. In Escrima, R. talked about the Sacral Chakra, too. Life force. Manu had an emotional moment and we were holding space for her.

Noticing a smiley patch on someone's back pocket. Telling him I liked how positive his butt looked that day. He smiled and asked me if I wanted another look. I said yes! Of course.

I went to the Slutering Let's Play event without C. and had a great time! And my first threesome with K. and U. (I loved the deep talk afterwards!) When we played Truth or Dare I kissed Martin and it was lovely. I adore his intense energy (and how he tastes).

Making a cup of hot chocolate using raw cocoa powder, chestnut honey and spices.

My last minute decision to join Anna's co-creative community weekend. I picked her up and we set up the space together. We played Krazy Words, burned a Chili Sin Carne, went swinging on the playground, cuddled and sang. I loved the makeshift doublebed for me and Christian.

I bought an e-bike! Finally!

[twistednuns]

Silvia Giordani (Italian, b. 1992)

Skyscrapers, 2024

Acrylic and oil on canvas

[twistednuns]

[twistednuns]

January 2025

My New Year's kiss. It's lovely to have somebody around I can kiss whenever I want. Listening to a weird Siberian song at midnight. It's been stuck in our heads for days now.

Going on a long walk on the first day of the year. Findus the cat kept following us. Frozen ponds with interesting air bubbles and plant patterns. Ice crystals on every twig and leaf of grass. Crunchy steps. Breaking the ice. Literally.

Cuddling with Mara. Reading a book together in bed. Making her a cute ponytail.

Starting the year with a health food challenge. No sugar, no flour, low carb. And I don't even have to do it alone which helps a lot!

Eating big bowls of salad with delicious dill dressing.

Watching The Substance - Body Horror at its best.

A fun way to think about relationship dynamics.

Slow days playing board games, watching animal documentaries, coming up with tasty low carb recipes, painting and drawing together, doing housework. Simply existing together in this little domestic bubble.

Solo cuddle time with Findus. Sinking my face into his belly fur.

Greek yoghurt with milk and fruit for breakfast. Almost tastes like ice-cream.

Lazy TV massages. / Another amazing massage from Ploy.

Spooking a few deer on our snowy forest stroll.

Watching birds trying to fly in heavy wind.

Tinned mushrooms as a low calorie snack.

Long, trippy dreams.

Nightly painting sessions listening to the Cosmic Matrix podcast.

Petting, scratching, cuddling Thea. Such a gentle little black cat. She was really into it that evening.

Bringing two whole containers worth of snacks on the train. Eggs, olives, cheese, veggies, apples.

Two nights at a hotel in Würzburg. The crisp white sheets.

Mushroom burgers and a cute art store.

Playing the piano with Georg.

Standing at a laptop in the living room at Claude's party. Adding songs from 20 years ago to the queue. Singing along to Such Great Heights by The Postal Service. C. remarked what a beautiful song it is. I feel down a 2000s Indie Rock rabbit hole and made a whole playlist on Spotify. How great is Staring at the Sun by TV on the Radio?!

Ripping apart my sudoku book because I was too obsessed.

Buying a bunch of Sennelier soft pastels and pastel crayons at Gerstaecker. Getting new paper, too.

Discovering Agnes Lawrence Pelton's art and the Transcendental Painting Group. I ordered a gorgeous book about the painters but it's not available yet. I'll have to wait up to three months for it to arrive...

Those little moments when I feel seen. Appreciated. Cared for. When C. commented on the amazing smell of my lavender marjoram hand cream and wanted to try some. When he noticed that my lipstick didn't really match the colour of my shirt. And when he ran my finger over a little naked patch of skin on my love handle and said he'd discovered a nice spot. When he carried my backpack because my shoulder hurt. Checked if I was keeping up when we were running for the train. And he already thought about ways to check in at the hotel without my involvement because he knows I hate that. And he added a song I played to his favourites. And kissed me at the bookstore because apparently I looked very intellectual which made me even more attractive.

Signing up for the info event at the art academy. Thinking about applying for visual arts, too.

Cutting train rides very short by sleeping most of the way.

Meeting Franzi and Marie! A cozy evening with a crazy cat, Indian food and easy conversation. I love it when people just get each other and still feel super close and familiar even though you don't see them very often.

Getting to know Anja. Being weird together. Coffee walks in the morning. Watching rom-coms in bed, singing along to Britney Spears songs.

The warm shower of compliments at the end of my Gestalt therapy training. I learned that what people admire about me is my humor, authenticity, intelligence, strength, wisdom, creativity, my voice. I know who I am. And many said they wish I could be a little more calm, relaxed and self-assured. Focus more. Tone down the drama and the fireworks and let my fragile, soft essence shine through as well.

Squeezing fresh lime over veggie curry. It adds so much flavor!

Peeling off the whole face mask in one piece.

Little signs along the way. The same drawing I'd made the day before on a house in a village I was driving through. Angel numbers. 222 everywhere.

Such a cozy and crazy last evening with C. We played a sexy card game and ended up roleplaying (I was a massage therapist in a senior home). Then I was reading from his 2009 US roadtrip diary while he showed my some photos from back then. It was so interesting to see that some things haven't changed: he's still passionate about music and DJing and still has interesting (business) ideas and conversation topics.

Dota - Für die Sterne / "Ich bin nicht hier um mich zu bemühn, ich bin hier um zu blühn."

A very active Friday. My first Nordic Walking unit (I meowed at a cat and it immediately came to me to be petted!), the first time in the gym for a while. And a yoga class. Felt surprisingly good.

Meeting a bunch of new people at the clinic. Feeling much more secure and open. This time it only took one day to fully arrive.

Music night with clarinet and guitar. Singing harmonies with Sebastian! Compliments for my voice.

Coffee and cheese as a treat.

Hot pink loafers. Soft and comfy.

Blooming tulips.

The joy I feel when I spot an animal somewhere.

People opening up to me. It's nice to see that they feel safe with me and value my observations and input.

Sending lots of letters and postcards.

The Diva Dance scene in the movie The Fifth Element.

Painting something I hated at first but loved in the end.

Another go at art therapy. I have a good feeling about the therapist!

Lena talking to me about all her creative endeavors. Breaking the ice.

Being helpful for others. Mirroring them, explaining, offering resonance.

Talking to W. about my way out. Which is: taking on a tapas. Self-accountability. Being honest and calm. Using my time with him to stop functioning so I can observe myself and heal.

A 45min walk despite the wet snow and cold wind. Feeling my body tingle and warm up afterwards. Also: when I came back I found a collection of old rusty puzzle cubes on an electrical box.

Caressing the bony part over my ankles.

Floor heating.

Watching the cranes flying over the lake illuminated by the warm light of sunrise.

Unlike mammals, birds breathe through con­tin­uous one-directional flow of air through the res­pi­ra­tory system. We take air in and breathe it out, sort of like the tide moves in and out of a bay. As a result, our breathing system is said to be tidal. Avians have a non-tidal res­pi­ra­tory system, with air flowing more like a running stream. (I didn't know!)

A beautiful sound bath with lots of crystal singing bowls and tuning forks that made my brain tickle.

A feast of damn fine veggies with tofu and nougat-filled dumplings. Celebrating every bite. Allowing myself to eat.

Boxing training. I loved the activation, aggression, using my whole body and strength. The psychological effects of having a partner (or opponent). But my whole body hurt the next day.

A few lines towards the end of Marianne Eloise's book obsessive intrusive magical thinking made me feel seen. A little mentally ill, too. But they made me think of my exiles. The parts of me I abandoned. And how I used to be as a child.

Painting an unexpected family portrait.

Starting to read a book about... soul travel. Trippy and fascinating.

A long, heartfelt message from Becky. And a thoughtful gift from my Gospel Choir: a sketchbook, a set of pencils, a novel (with the number 22 in the title!!) and some chocolates. I feel loved.

Dancing like nobody is watching. And even though I'd felt like shit all day it actually brought my energy back. And someone said the thought I had a really good feeling for my body and movements. And a lovely voice.

[twistednuns]

[twistednuns]

A temple caretaker watching a volcano eruption in Bali [s]