#Gay Ford real and canon
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vintage-fuzz · 10 months ago
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Never thought I’d see the day where Billford-Fiddauthor toxic polycule is (maybe) canon??
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dandeleon · 5 months ago
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it mcgucket monday (da WHOLE family here‼️)
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rystiel · 8 months ago
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idk what we’re all calling the concept of fiddlestan working together but i’m calling my version the portal partners AU 🙏🏼
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#gave it a name bc i was kinda tired of calling it the Fidds and Stan Work Together on the Portal AU#it’s called portal partners bc they’re partners in fixing the portal partners in running the shack AND partners in life#ik i’m not the only one to think of an au where they start working together after ford goes missing#but i don’t see a lot of people really showing the older version of them ? i don’t think ?#like i’ve seen canon older fiddlestan but not older fiddlestan after working together for 30 years ? idk#also figured fidds would look different in a world where he doesn’t lose his mind in his 30s#🤷🏻‍♂️#gay old men#yay#stan looks and acts the same btw he just happens to also have a very longterm bf to be gay with#gravity falls took place before gay marriage was legal (jesus christ that’s crazy to think about) so that’s why i say very longterm bf#(this means ford would be back in time to attend their wedding tho so. best man ford real. fidd & ford may be sort-of-exes but it’s fine)#gravity falls#gravity falls au#fiddlestan#also… petition to start calling fiddlestan fiddley#bc fiddle(ford) + (stan)ley …. fiddley… u see the vision????#fiddley#🙂‍↕️🙏🏼#stanley pines#fiddleford mcgucket#gravity falls fanart#idk man i’m gonna tag the au too ig#portal partners au#gravity falls portal partners au#???#my art#(i guess? used a fidds base then redrew it with my changes so idk)#rystiart#sorry if someone’s done smthn similar bc i feel like this idea of them working together is pretty popular maybe 😭
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abyssalzones · 5 months ago
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can I say something is this a safe space. it's kind of fascinating that ford is meant to read as a deeply repressed character and a capital s Scientist no less but he leads this other half of his life entirely dedicated to the occult. in the 70's-80's. like the historical connotations of the occult and what they represented in the united states at least seems kind of interesting in this context. for no reason in particular I find the dual aspects of "extremely dedicated to presenting as a logical, steadfast researcher trying to earn respect and social acceptance to the point of hinging all of his self worth on this vision for the future working out" and "deeply tied to the paranormal and "unsavory black magic" and everything Weird/freakish but feels like he needs to hide this aspect of himself from even the people closest to him" Very interesting. hiding six-fingered hands compulsively behind his back even if it's the emblem he puts on his journals. "what are you attracted to?" and "maybe you're simply attracted to things that hurt you" from two different points in the book. sweet dreams (are made of this) on the record player. hey does anyone know what that tarot card with a snake on it is meant to represent
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nitemurr · 9 months ago
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This song is so Ford coded it's insane i can't get over it
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kcthelazyartist · 9 months ago
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Fiddauthor may be canon, let’s discuss
At first glance this relationship appears to be completely fanon, but when you dig into it there's actually a lot more to Stanford and Fiddleford’s relationship than meets the eye.
This is a compilation of evidence [And slight analysis] so if I have missed anything or if anything is wrong, please let me know.
Warning: Long post ahead
Setting
-As @ratsbanes mentions during Stanford and Fiddleford’s college years the aids crisis was going on, during this time there was a lot of misinformation and fear mongering as it was falsely thought that only queer men could be affected. This event is very significant in queer history and needs to be considered when looking at their relationship.
-Fiddleford came from a hog farm in Tennessee, a deeply religious state, and as he is told to be superstitious, crossing himself when walking over graves, it can be assumed he too is religious
Religions in the same circle as Christianity tend to hold homophobic views as was common during this time
This creates religious guilt for queer people
-Queer politics were becoming a hot topic and most of society was homophobic during this period, there is a chance it was still illegal to be queer whilst they were in college, depending on where they were
This led to a lot of violence against queer people and a very real fear of being outed as it could have dire consequences
There was even programs in the military dedicated to having ‘gay spies’ to act queer and attract gay men in the military so they could be punished or discharged
There was also the Vietnam war going on, causing political unrest and many protests, america being very unstable during this period
-Lavender marriages [Marriages between heterosexuals and homosexuals, often to conceal the latters sexuality] were still common
-Putting this altogether into Fiddleford’s character it could create a very real feeling of religious guilt and fear of being outed that could of led to him entering a lavender marriage instead of staying with Stanford. Fiddleford would have had to worry about violence against himself and his family’s view of him, which he would likely worry about as he has shown signs of anxiety [But this may just be because of trauma]
It appears Fiddleford and his wife got married quickly when he left college which makes it all the more suspicious, whilst it could be they were high school sweethearts or an out of wedlock situation, it is more likely it's his fear of being outed that led to such a quick decision. [I will talk for about him and Emma-May later]
-Stanford was also in a position not to pursue anything as it can be assumed Filbrick was not the best father due to him throwing a 17-year old Stanley onto the street with almost nothing, leaving him to the wolves after refusing to hear his side of the story, and not coming to Stanley’s funeral. Filbrick instead views Stanford as something to make him money with his talents which is why he's so angry at Stanley for ruining their chances.
This would put stress on Stanford as to not disappoint his father and be the perfect child and it can be assumed that Flibrick was homophobic as many were back then.
Deep bond
-They are close enough Stanford has a measuring system for Fiddleford’s restless legs, knee bounce per second, AKA KBPS
-Stanford knows Fiddleford’s favourite can of beans, and stocks them in the bunker
-Stanford calls Fiddleford his ‘friend’, ‘assistant’, ‘partner’, and ‘buddy’, putting him on the same level as himself, not putting him down until Bill manipulates him.
-Fiddleford could tell that something was wrong with Stanford, even the slightest movement when meditating clued him in as shown in one of the flashbacks.
This itself is further evidence of their bond as Stanford trusts him enough to let him into the worship room and meditates around him, which leaves Ford vulnerable to attacks
Even parallel Fiddleford knows this isn't his own, though that can be explained through an age difference.
-Fiddleford loves his banjos, having multiple collections of them such as the one in the Gideon Bot blueprint, but he uses them as a weapon to protect others, willing to break his most prized possession to help others. He does this twice for Stanford, once during Weirdmageddon and another time to save him directly from Krampus.
During this Krampus attack Fidds had just gotten back when he saved Stanford who was about to basically be murdered, all whilst Bill was nowhere to be found
-Fiddleford only really violates Stanford’s boundaries and trust after the memory gun and neglect of his mental health have come into the picture, he does this when he steals the book to create a thesis to try and help Ford, and when he used the memory gun on him [More on this later]
-Alex Hirsch refers to them as the kind of friends with the same kind of interests and humour
-After 30 years away there is a thought shown on the mind reading machine that just says ‘I’m sorry Fiddleford’, completely unprompted
-The ‘Sorry’ photo in general
-When they first met Ford saved Fiddleford from dropping out due to embarrassment
He stayed up 9 hours with a stranger to help him prove a theory
-Ford takes notice of Fiddleford’s reaction to the cubics cube and takes joy in messing with him, knowing he wont get angry at him
-Both recognize each other at weirdmageddon despite how long they have spent apart [Ford may have seen him in Dipper’s part of the journal, but Fidds, with brain damage, had no reason to recognize him]
-Despite disliking Fiddleford’s tobacco chewing habit Ford allows him to continue with it
-Fiddleford can read Stanley, who has similar mannerisms to Ford, like a book
This is after he has lost his memories, such as when he calls out Stan’s suspicious laughter
-When Fiddleford first arrives at Fords house he mentions being ‘overcome with emotion’ and is overjoyed to see him, going out of his way to buy him banjo strings and microchips
Despite having Bill he is very lonely and is very happy to see Fiddleford again, saying ‘the past few days have been the most energising I’ve had since I first came to this town!’
-Ford originally doesn't tell Fiddleford of Bill because he doesn't want Fiddleford to think he's insane or badly of him, as he knows his friend is superstitious
-Ford teaches Fiddleford to meditate to help with his anxiety
-Fiddleford chastises Ford for staying up too late and not getting enough sleep, to which Stanford is comfortable enough with him to make a retort
-Ford appears to look for Fiddleford after coming to his senses and is immediately remorseful
-Ford keeps comparing parallel Fiddleford to his own, showing how much he misses him
Obsessions
-Ford has an obsession with Bill and Work, worshipping both like gods
Despite this he takes time from work or Bill to spend with Fiddleford instead;
After the gremloblin incident Ford takes Fiddleford to a fair, he throws a christmas party for Fiddleford and when the shapeshifter attacks and ties up Fiddleford he immediately shuts all work he was doing with the shapeshifter down despite his obsession of learning about creatures [This could be because he nearly got his hands on the journals but he appears to have tried to get them before and this event was the catalyst]
-Fiddleford appears to be obsessed with Stanford and later the memory gun due to it
Fiddleford leaves his family very quickly to join someone he hasn't seen in over 6 years, which is the first sign, then he stays after being traumatised and put in near death situations.
This devotion is made obvious when he stays to help with the portal even after his thesis and ideas have been blown off and his safety ignored, only leaving after seeing the horrors beyond the portal. This leads into the memory gun.
Fiddleford creates this as a way to cope and be able to stay alongside Stanford and help him, because he starts using the memory gun instead of leaving this toxic situation after seeing the gremloblin he becomes addicted
The memory gun is symbolism for addiction and self-harm when it comes to Fiddleford, he is aware it might be doing damage later on but he cant stop using it, its implied he even used it after noticing he wasn't wearing a piece of clothing right, which may have been a side effect of the memory gun.
Unlike Stanford Fiddleford does not have anyone to help him realise how obsessed he is or stop him, so he only continues to spiral, making his anxiety and self-harm worse [His hair pulling is also self-harm, though less obvious]
His obsession with Stanford is what led to this sadly.
His obsessions lead to him stealing the book to create a thesis to try and help Ford, and using the memory gun on Stanford [He uses it on him for both unknown reasons and to stop him from remembering construction workers, as well as maybe witnessing him in the red cape using the gun on himself or others. Even then you have to remember Fiddleford had been using it on himself and was not in the right state of mind due to Ford’s neglect, as Fiddleford was repeatedly shown to be kind and have a big heart but as his mental state declined so did his morals] This is sad as it shows that Fiddleford knows its bad but is already showing signs of addiction when he first makes it.
This ultimately ends up with him breaking his own mind to a point where it scares and hurts BILL CIPHER, hurts him in a way he doesnt think is hilarious
Bill Cipher
-Both Bill and Fiddleford are obsessed with Stanford, though they go about it differently
Bill’s obsession destroys Stanford, Stanford’s obsession destroys Fiddleford and Fiddleford’s obsession destroys himself
Bill manipulates and guilt trips Ford into getting what he wants, often using flattery or a twisted form of it, feeding into Fords insecurities
Meanwhile at first Fiddleford is just doing whatever he can to help Stanford, only hurting him after the gremloblin incident that destroys his psyche
-Before Bill came along Ford admired Fiddleford for his ‘brilliant mind’, heart and trustworthiness, but Bill manipulated him into thinking lesser of those qualities of his, even then during the portal incident he calls Fiddleford ‘buddy’.
-Bill repeatedly tries to get rid of anything Fiddleford gets Ford
-Bill and Fiddleford have some similarities
For Stanford’s birthday Bill possessed a bunch of rats and used them to spell out his name [This is interesting due to both Ford and Bill having a tendency to mix up both love and fear, Ford not reacting properly to monsters when he should fear them but instead being fascinated], he then insists on taking Ford out for a drink, when Ford was not the most willing to [Contrasting to him willingly and even suggesting getting drunk with Fiddleford on Christmas after he saved him, drinking eggnog, despite not celebrating Christmas]
Meanwhile Fiddleford handmakes two gifts for Christmas for Ford, despite knowing Ford doesn't celebrate, which makes Ford very happy and makes him want to spend time with Fiddleford [Did Bill have this gift giving tradition beforehand or did he see a memory or dream of Fiddleford’s gift giving tendencies and copy it like he did with Ford’s love language of experiences? Or are they just that similar?]
Both are obsessed with Stanford; Bill using manipulation, flattery and guilt tripping to get what he wants from him, feeding into Ford’s insecurities and ego. Meanwhile Fiddleford is devoted to helping Stanford achieve his goals instead of his own like Bill is. Even when he uses the memory gun it's to help Stanford so he can continue working and so the construction workers can help the portal be built quicker.
Emma-May
-Emma-May and Fiddleford’s relationship appears to already be rocky when Ford calls him
Fiddleford is seen working out of the cluttered garage, instead of a building, this might show he isn't making much money which could cause strain as she would need to work more to help provide for her son
He is isolated from her in the garage and is seen playing his banjo in the garage instead of with his family around, he also appears to have made himself at home in the garage instead of inside his house
This could be seen as a mancave, which was often used by men who didn't love their wives and ‘needed time away from them���, this could be explained through Fiddleford just being neurodivergent though as he shows signs of being on the spectrum- and not every man with a mancave dislikes their wives
She was also rather quick to get divorced for the time when her husband is away getting money for them.
-There is also signs he might not have any romantic interest in Emma-May or women in general, and if he does it is far less than the feelings he has towards Stanford
He rather quickly leaves his wife to go after Stanford
He makes Stanford TWO Christmas gifts [One of which required 5 prototypes], but forgot to even buy her one [This could be because of the memory gun but as its not mentioned that he forgot to get his son anything it can be assumed he remembered his- and we know he loves Tate]
He makes a continued effort to get his son [and somewhat Stanford] back, the gobblewonker is implied to not be the only way he has tried to get Tate back as Tate seems very done with him, and Stanford and him reconnect as he easily forgives him despite everything. Yet he only seems to have tried to get his wife back once with the pterodactyl, the same amount of effort he gave his friend when he didn't come to his retirement party. In the end he isn't even shown trying to reconnect with her even in a friend or co-parent way after he’s regained his sanity.
The robot and raccoon wife can be explained through the same reason; Heteronormativity. In this context it could be seen as Fiddleford wanting to have a nuclear family and be ‘normal’ [AKA, not queer] or feeling pressured to, which might be why he married and had a child so young, seemingly right out of college. Raccoon wife and the robot could be seen as him trying to be ‘normal’ and disliking that its been taken from him, trying to get some semblance of his old life back.
Love language
-Someone on tumblr pointed out both Ford and Fiddleford’s love languages [I cannot find their post…]
-Ford’s love language is experiences
He invited Fiddleford to help him with portal in the first place
After the gremloblin incident Ford takes Fiddleford to a fair
The duo go hiking together to the spaceship
And the biggest one is the Christmas incident, he wants to spend time with Fiddleford after he gave him gifts but is unable to at the time and Bill tries to cheer him up with another experience… Only for Ford to be attacked by Krampus and saved by Fiddleford, he then decorates the portal room for a holiday he doesn't even celebrate and builds snowmen that resemble each other with him.
-Fiddleford’s love language is gift giving
He gives him a homemade snow globe [Which Ford accidentally breaks thanks to Bill]
He handmakes six-fingered gloves that required 5 prototypes [They later give Ford comfort]
He buys him a squash that looks like a face because it reminds him of Ford [Of which Ford wrote an entire page about before throwing out]
He gifts him an axolotl because it reminded him of his sideburns [Bill later manipulates him into getting rid of it after a lot of struggle from Ford]
Downright Suspicious
-When Fiddleford is called by Stanford he very quickly leaves his wife and son behind to travel to Gravity Falls and live alone with him in the woods without anyone living nearby for miles, somewhere nobody can see them work… Or interact
-Fiddleford designed the bunker with only one bed, one small bed for him and Ford to share
Several people have mentioned that they would have to be practically on top of eachother to fit on said bed
Fiddleford would not be aware that Stanford doesn't sleep, meaning they were planning on sleeping in the same bed together. This is furthered by the supplies for years into the future and having both of their belongings littered throughout the space, such as the shmez dispenser.
Stanford in the journal mentions losing Fiddleford’s shmez dispenser, this implies either he was moving stuff around or they were sharing it. And Fiddleford does not like people messing with his stuff, as shown with the cubics cube.
-In journal 3 at the end when Ford goes to see Fiddleford they sit by a furnace and Fiddleford plays on his banjo, Ford says he can practically see ‘the age lift off his face’.
A common thing in romance stories is thinking back on when the duo was younger together, this mimics that plot device.
-Ford draws Fiddleford more than once in journal 3
He usually only draws people once in the journal, but Fiddleford and his family get drawn more than once. This may mean he considers him as close as family
He also draws him from behind, obscuring his face as if Fiddleford doesnt know he is drawing him or if he feels guilty about doing so [Another common romance plot; drawing your crush without them knowing]
-Ford says Fiddleford has one of the biggest hearts he's ever seen, and says he used to hold him so dear
-Bill hates polyamory and calls Fiddleford a ‘third wheel’
Despite the Ford’s knowing each other longer
-Ford lets Fiddleford hug him during weirdmageddon and reciprocates despite disliking touch and only really being shown giving side hugs
Whether this is because he isnt used to Fiddleford full on hugging him or wasn't expecting to be forgiven and trusted so easily is up to debate, as the position leaves the back vulnerable to attack, showing how much Fiddleford trusts him.
They also shown in the ‘sorry’ photo in a side hug, hanging onto each other
-When Fiddleford brings up marriage Ford immediately shifts to him being thankful that Fiddleford is helping him.
-They stargazed together, one again a common romantic plot point
-In journal three there is a quote from when talking about the bunker's security system, ‘Sometimes I think how fortunate I am to be friends with F… because if this room is any indication, it would be terrifying to be his enemy’. This format is suspicious as the wording can make it seem joking, or make it seem like he is making an excuse for thinking this- and why would he feel weird for thinking this if there wasn't some sort of romantic undertones between them.
-In a livestream [‘Alex & Dana Charity Draw-A-Thon’ on TheMysteryofGF on youtube, at 45:48] When asked whether McGucket loves Ford, Alex says yes before expanding on that and calling them friends
At first I thought this was a way to get around Disney’s censors but later he confirms the deputy’s relationship
Story Importance
-Fiddleford is the only reason why Bill was able to be defeated
It took Ford around 30 years to build something able to destroy Bill, and it was a parallel Fiddleford that got him the final component to finish it, just looking at the weapon and knowing what it needed. Then the weapon that actually killed him was the memory gun, something that took Fiddleford under a year to create. [Maybe even in a couple of days whilst he wasn't in his right mind due to the gremloblin]
This combined with him and Ford's bond means Fiddleford is a real threat to Bill, as he keeps Ford grounded in reality and is smart enough to know something is wrong about what they are doing with the portal before anything happens, he even warns Ford, which makes him even more of a threat.
Bill attempts to manipulate Ford into distancing himself and thinking lowly of Fiddleford, and it works, for a period of time. It really shows how strong their bond is because while he is angry at Fiddleford leaving the event planted the seeds of doubt in his brain. Instead of continuing to trust Bill when he starts hearing things after years of being manipulated [Bill would even injure him! And Ford did not react like a person not being abused typically would in that situation], he realises Fiddleford was right and confronts Bill who likely realised that he could no longer manipulate him, as if he thought he could continue he would have, it would have been easier to reach his goal that way.
Fiddleford leaving is what caused Stanford to unravel as Fiddleford was the only one grounding him.
Stanford brushing off Fiddleford’s thesis and fears was the turning point as the ring the witch gave him turned black after this altercation
-Stanford has presumably been carrying the guilt of how he treated fiddleford for 30 years, this likely contributed to Stanford pushing others away and acting how he did towards his brother and family after leaving the portal, as he didn't have that someone that helped him trust others anymore, he's been alone for 30 years.
-Fiddleford was Ford’s first ever real friend outside his family
When he met Fiddleford he helped prove his theory and they finished it together and put both their names on it, this is important to the story as the reason Ford doesn't accept his thesis is because he is paranoid of somebody else stealing his theory. [Parallel Fiddleford and Ford even share a company together]
Furthering the previous point Ford was considering telling Fiddleford of his muse before finding out Fiddleford had created a thesis for him, a thesis where Fiddleford only credited Ford and based it off his work. Ford instead of taking this as Fiddleford wanting to help instead took it the wrong way due to his paranoia
Fiddleford didn't even notice Ford’s polydactyl when they first met and seems completely unbothered by it, basically brushing over it. Bill on the other hand makes a big deal of it, basically saying its why he can become one of Bill’s ‘freaks’, something he was called as a child.
Bill acts as if he is the only one to understand Ford and as if he is Ford’s first and only friend to manipulate him, despite Fiddleford understanding him so well he can tell something is wrong from the smallest movement when Mabel couldn't tell something was wrong with Dipper. 
It takes Bill a long time to drive the duo apart and change Ford’s views of Fiddleford into ‘he wouldnt understand’ as he knows Fiddleford could ruin his plans [Bill had been with Ford since the 2nd journal and had time to manipulate him before Fiddleford arrived, even with this considered his view of his friend is still positive once he sees him again. He may say he has no choice but to ask for help before seeing Fiddleford, yet he is very very happy upon Fiddleford arriving- this hints that Bill has already started manipulating his views]
Ford wants to be famous and Bill feeds into his ego on this, knowing Ford wants to prove himself. Fiddleford can't seem to understand this as he already sees Ford as normal, but he wants him to be happy, which is why he helps because if money makes him happy so be it. Fiddleford does not question it and reserves judgement.
-Thank you to @jellied-beans in the comments for pointing out something I missed! That being without Fiddleford they would not have been able to get in and rescue Ford and all the other civilians.
Jellied-beans points out that Stan did not want to go through with the plan to rescue Ford, but it was Fiddleford who took the lead despite only recently regaining and reliving the trauma Ford had put him through, and even after he and Ford's last interaction was cruel.
Fiddleford is also the only reason the Shack-A-Tron became a thing, as it was his engineering and planning that saw it become a reality. Without him it would have taken much longer to rescue Ford and everyone else
This situation also goes to prove Fiddleford does in fact have a big heart and is empathetic as he not only rescues the man whos hurt him and easily forgives him, but Stan mentions that he led a bunch refugees to the shack with him.
End note; I attempted to keep in any points I have found and tried not to leave any information out, as well as leaving in anything nuanced [Such as the Christmas gift situation maybe being caused by the memory gun]. I find this important as I’ve seen people arguing against the ship and calling it generally toxic, whilst leaving out crucial details such as Bill's manipulation, as well as people calling Fiddleford a bad person due to the whole memory gun thing and completely ignoring why he did it.
[As a side note Fiddauthor definitely toxic during the Bill era, but overall it's not, and unlike Billford they are able to mend their relationship as its built on understanding and genuine feelings, as shown by the parallel world where they were able to trust each other and repair their relationship]
I have not read the Book of Bill yet so this might be updated later, any BoB content on this is just what I have seen circulating around.
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gayelderstourney · 2 years ago
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OLD MAN YAOI BRACKET ROUND 2
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Propaganda:
Fiddleford McGucket/Stanford Pines:
lab "partners" who broke the laws of physics and nature together but it went horribly wrong and one of them got stranded in alternate dimensions and the other wiped his memory so hard he went mad. 30 years later and they were finally able to reunite during the apocalypse. even though both had changed so much they wanted to forgive each other and move forwards
if fiddauthor isn't real then why is there only one bed in the bunker. if fiddauthor isn't real then why did they go stargazing and talk about wanting to start a family. if fiddauthor isn't real then why "my partner" and "my fiddleford". if fiddauthor isn't real then why does fiddleford subconsciously hang out around the shack decades after he stopped living there. if fiddauthor isn't real then why does ford have dreams about him every night. if fiddauthor isn't real then why did fiddleford leave his son and his failing/failed marriage to go live alone in an isolated cottage in the woods with his best friend from college. if fiddauthor isn't real then why is ford's ideal world one where he gets to work with fiddleford for the rest of time. if fiddauthor isn't real then why "life would be a nightmare without them" and "it's the most meaningful thing in the world". if fiddauthor isn't real then why did alex hirsch change that one scene in the book to sound less gay. if fiddauthor isn't real then why did fiddleford make his laptop password ford's name. if fiddauthor isn't real then why did they hold hands while hugging. if fiddauthor isn't real then why "i could have sworn that as he joyfully played, i could see the age lift off his face, and see the fiddleford who had been my friend so many years ago". IF FIDDAUTHOR ISN'T REAL THEN WHY DID FORD'S MORE HONEST RETELLING OF THE PORTAL SCENE FEATURE HIM GENTLY CRADLING FIDDLEFORD IN HIS ARMS
Bob Zanotto/Helmut Fullbear:
THEY LITERALLY MADE MR CRY THE FIRST TIME I PLAYED THE GAME. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND THEY FINALLY GET TO BE HAPPY TOGETHER. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO ME.
they are married in canon and are epic and amazing. they had sad canon events where bob thought helmut was dead for like 30 years or something but helmut WASN'T dead his brain was still alive and they are reunited in the game first by way of stealing an evil dictator's body and then later on they put helmut's brain in a ball as a temporary fix while they go out to find his body which has been frozen in ice. the game forces you to walk through bob's memory of saying his vows at their wedding ceremony and it's seriously some of the most romantic and heartwarming shit i've ever heard, especially "just when i thought i was turning to seed, you made me bloom again" like my god. i love them
they're gay and old as hell!!!! there's a level dedicated to their wedding!!!
Helmut is voiced by Jack Black and is currently a brain in a ball, and Bob knows him so well that the mental image of him in his drunken mind says things Bob KNOWS the real Helmut would never say. Also Helmut is temporarily in the body of a guy voiced by Elijah Wood-
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shmisky · 3 months ago
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whats your headcanon sexualities for the stan twins
Ah, a pretty fun one!
I’m aware that you probably just wanted me to answer with my opinions and not, say, an analysis about it, but then again you sent it to me, and I couldn’t resist yapping about it! So, yes, I shoved some canon tidbits in here too...
I think Stan’s bi, bisexual and biromantic. I don’t think it’s hard for him to actually fall in love because of the completely smitten way he talks about Marilyn, his ex-wife, in his commentary of Land Before Swine.
Uh, sometimes comedy comes from a place of pain and I, y’know, was actually married for less than a day. [...] Reach for the same slot machine handle and it was love at first sight. Marilyn. [...] Man, I was putty in her hands. [...] And I guess her name was fake and her hair was fake, but y’know, the love was real. She really was the one that got away. [...] Sometimes I still think of her. [...] I had love in my life once and uh, y’know, it bit me. And I learnt a bit of a lesson from that which is ya open your heart and blood comes out and ya die. So, y’know, try not to be a sap like I was.
And regarding his attraction to men, well! Even if I weren’t a stancest shipper, we would have this:
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And, amusingly, even this (referencing Stan’s marriage to Goldie in Soos and the Real Girl), despite me not taking it seriously:
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I’ve seen a gen artist headcanoning him as lithromantic—that is, feeling romantic feelings for someone but not desiring reciprocation, to the point of maybe losing interest if the person reciprocates. That... checks out! A lot! Especially if you consider Stan’s experience with Lady Susan. But since I headcanon him as having reciprocated romantic feelings for Ford as a stancest shipper, I save lithro!Stan for when I’m in a gen mood.
Now, Ford... Why is everything more complicated with Ford? 😭
I headcanon him as demisexual and demiromantic, in both cases bi.
Why demi? Well, first of all, we see that Ford really isn’t in his element when it comes to romance/attraction:
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If you didn’t watch J. K. Simmons as Ford reacting to TikTok thirst comments, please do. The entire (hilarious) video is just... the fandom’s horniness over Ford going straight over his head. He somehow manages to interpret all the comments wrongly, until he finally understands their sexual meaning and then promptly gets both horrified and enraged.
This is how Alex sees Ford’s sexuality, from this interview:
Stan shows that he has romantic interests, Mabel shows that she has romantic interests, Dipper shows that he has romantic interests, Ford shows none of that. He has sublimated himself romantically so, so deeply.
I think, for people on all sides of the gender and sexuality equation, the idea of, “I can’t—I’m not sure what this part of myself is, so I’m going to fixate on something I can understand. I am going to become the guiness world record holder on making lego re-creations, of this, and I’m gonna get better at it than anything, and if—as long as I’m doing this, um, then I don’t have to focus on that.”
People speculate about Nikola Tesla’s sexuality, it’s like, there’s a lot of people - some people say—‘cause Tesla was hot, and he was lyrical and poetic and mysterious, and women—they say—were very drawn to Tesla. And Tesla doesn’t talk about women. In Tesla’s autobiography, he talks about how, like, women’s earrings freak him out, and he hears clanging train whistles in his head when he sees an exposed ankle. He was so off in his own plane!
I really thought of Ford kind of like Tesla in that realm. He is distant. So it doesn’t at all surprise me that people found their own experience reflected through Ford in that way.
But it was, you know, when we were doing Gravity Falls, like, gay marriage had only like, just been legalized!
I think all of this heavily hints to Ford being in the ace/aro spectrum.
Now, why bi?
We see subtle hints of Ford being perhaps attracted to men even before the whole drama with Bill, such as his little comment about the Invisible Wizard’s good looks:
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But we also see hints of his attraction to women! I was convinced, before, that Ford could only be gay (and demi) and that any and all hints of his attraction to women were comphet. The only “proof” of sorts that I had is:
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That “the ladies” became “lies” in the blacklight version, hahah.
But is this enough to stand against the evidence we have of him showing even a certain eagerness to be liked by women?
From the same commentary on Land Before Swine:
[Dipper] gets [his creepiness] from Ford, I think. That and his inability to make eye contact with women. [...] Fordsy had a fear of girls ever since Cathy Crenshaw got freaked out by his hand in third grade. [...] He tried to hold a girl’s hand. She spilled punch on his head and ever since then he had a hard time talking to girls, unlike—unlike myself. That’s life. Anyway, cut to high school, the guy’s never kissed a girl, prom is coming up and he asked me for advice. “Stanley, I know things have been a little weird between you and me with college but can you talk to me about girls?” 
That indicates a lack of ability with girls, but not lack of eagerness. And, indeed, Bill mocks him for it in Journal 3, confirming Stan’s tale:
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“Little Cathy, what a dream.” The fact Ford possibly considered her to be dreamy hints of Ford having been actually interested in her.
Bill again mocks him (together with Dipper) in TBoB:
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And alright, this does sound like very generic cheap mockery, like, “hahah, virgin loser!” But why would Bill go so far as to repeat the joke if he didn’t think Ford wouldn’t at least be a little bit annoyed by it? If he knew Ford was 100% interested in men/male beings, his joke about Ford’s lack of sway with women would have been pathetic. And yes, I know Bill is desperate and pathetic and TBoB, but he usually knows where to hit Ford, as exemplified by him mocking Ford’s hands in front of his Henchmaniacs.
Then of course you have the Soothsquitos’ advices for Ford, including giving the Oracle (Jheselbraum) his phone number:
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Even adult researcher Ford is excited about finally getting women to talk to him (and this is also in the blacklight version of Journal 3, which shows that he couldn’t have been dismissing his interest in women as just “lies” when he finally got the chance to write in blacklight):
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Dipper is impressed, in the comics, with the fact his Grunkle Ford had once dated a siren:
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And a lot of people assume that to have been Bill, since the page we can see is talking about Bill, but... that doesn’t make much sense. Why Dipper would be so happy and excited and not horrified? After all, he hates and fears Bill. Why wouldn’t Dipper go straight to the point and call the “siren” by his name, Bill? Why would Dipper describe Bill by “siren” and not “demon”? What kind of euphemism is this? I think it’s way more likely that Dipper had read about the siren in a previous page and just happened to comment about it when he reached the Bill page.
The siren in question is probably this girlie from the storyboard of AToTS drawn and shared by S. H. Cotguno on TikTok.
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And, of course, we can’t forget one of the deleted scenes from the end credit montage:
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This one is particularly hilarious to me because when I first watched it, I thought it was supposed to be about the Stan twins were competing for the same lady. But then I realized that Stan had arrived first, smirking and holding his own flower, and sat down. Only then Ford appears and sits down too, mirroring Stan’s smirk, despite the fact he had already seen Stan there. And Stan doesn’t seem phased by Ford’s arrival, he continues smirking. Only when the lady gets up and leaves them that they turn angrily to each other 😭 They were fully ready to share her...
So yeah, I do believe Ford was/is interested in women in the same way he is in men, but he can’t deal with that very well for lots of reasons. I think he tries, but ultimately doesn’t experience romance in the way Stan does and that confuses and frustrates him. The only “people” he’s been truly in love with, imo, were Bill and Stan, and it would still be that way if Bill and Stan were female. So yeah, Ford to me is a bi ice cream with demi sauce on top.
I don’t think that’s how the Stans would define themselves, though. They likely don’t even know most of LGBTQ+ labels, much less the fact that you can be both demi and bi and stuff like that, and I prefer to stick to a more realistic approach.
Stanley, jokes about marrying Goldie aside, would probably still think he’s straight. His twin is... his twin is something special, okay? Ford doesn’t count. Ford is Ford.
Ford, on the other hand, would be so out of his depth that he wouldn’t even know how to answer the question. I don’t know if he would even be able to identify his attraction to Bill as romantic, and being in love with Stan just feels natural to him.
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thepringlesofblood · 3 months ago
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so, canonically, the mythical figure achilles is important enough to bill that he remembers him and references him in witty banter.
what is the funniest possible reason for this? (i do not care about realism)
*as in that stuff in journal 3 where ford's like 'if icarus could see me now' after finding out about bill. i know these two myths are not related I have a degree in ancient mediterranean history. something to be said about ancient greek myths where the protagonist has a fatal flaw that brings about their downfall though. but it's probably not that deep.
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sillyscientists · 9 months ago
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gimmw your gfalls hcs NOEWWW
oh god! I have soooo many but i'll put some basic ones down for the pines family rn and probably add on to this later ^_^
Dipper
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◇ First of all this boy is absolutely autistic. My little autistic ass acted so much like him as a kid, I mean, what autistic 12 year old wouldn't base their entire summer around a weird book full of monsters they found?
◇ I think he's a trans dude and aro/ace, and that his crush on Wendy was more comphet than anything. I'm not really a fan of any ship involving him but I think platonic dipcifica could be cute.
◇ Cryptozoology/The Paranormal is absolutely his main special interest, but he also has an sp/in in computers/comp sci (but he's honestly not great at computer stuff).
Mabel
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◇ AuDHD Queen! I think her main special interest is absolutely arts / crafts, I mean look at all the silly things she makes throughout the series as well as her dedication to handmaking dozens of puppets/props/etc as well as writing and entire play to impress her crush of the week in Sock Opera. ◇ I think sexuality wise she's not straight but prefers to be unlabelled. I also like to think she's the type to collect xenogenders / neopronouns like pokemon cards. ( she totally uses a bunch of cat-based pronouns) ◇ Shortly after the series I think she'd get a little less Boys-Crazy and focus more exploring who she is as a person / her self expression. Absolutely is gonna have a mall goth/emo/scene phase (she's smushing all three of those together into one thing for herself).
(I also think Mabel and Dipper were born identical twins)
Grunkle Stan
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◇ Also AuDHD, not quite sure what his big main special interest would be but he's absolutely hyperfixated on Ducktective. Also going off the story in Lost Legends I think he'd absolutely be getting into making comics / drawing in general (even if hes not great at it). Post series I think he'd spend a lot of his free time out at sea drawing in the boat's cabin. Mostly making comics of silly re-tellings of he and Ford's adventures out at Sea (he absolutely shows Dipper and Mabel these if he and Ford video calls them when they're on land) ◇ I'm a transfem Stanley truther. He doesn't really realize/come to terms with it until post-series. I think she'd just grow out her hair and throw it in a pony-tail + use she/he pronouns to transition. She'd still use the name Stanley and be fine with both masc/fem terms (ie fine be called a man or a woman). Also he's bisexual (but has known this since he was like a teen, even if he didn't have the words to label it.) ◇ I think his Popsicle addiction from the unaired pilot is real and canon. Old autistic men love popsicles just look at my dad and grandfather.
Ford
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◇ oh boy its projection time (i am a stanford pines fictive) 😈😈😈
◇ Transmasc, somewhere under the nonbinary umbrella but very guy adjacent. Mainly uses he/him pronouns but I think he'd use "it" and "they" aswell. Gay and Arospec as well. ◇ Autism + NPD + Schizophrenia wombo combo. He's sooooo NPD coded its INSANE, I am going to write an essay about it in the future. Goes without saying that his special interests are the paranormal and various sciences, but I think he has a hardcore love for the arts as well. ◇ Going off both the autism and arospec HC- I think he's the type to convince himself he has a crush very easily, when in reality he just has a strong admiration / platonic love for those in question, and had strong platonic feelings for McGucket back in college that he confused for romantic ones (projecting 100000000%) (i think the Stan twins were fraternal twins)
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dolls-self-ships · 6 months ago
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related to my last post (on Ford's sexuality/romantic orientation)
ok, this is going to sound really stupid so please, bare in mind that I am aware that this is a fictional character and he isn't real and even alex hirsch himself said that anyway a fan might resonate with a character can be true to them. With that being said, I personally don't love the headcanon that Ford is gay. I myself am aroace, and a lot of what he seems to experience in terms of romantic relationships and his feelings on them seem to align more with my own and lots of other aroace people that I know. And idk why but fandoms and esp just the lgbtq community in general seem to be really dismissive of aroace people (some don't even consider us queer but thats another post), and idk why but it just bothers me that anytime a character in canon expresses little to no intrest in romance it becomes almost automatically fanon that said character must be gay and not know it, as if being aroace just isn't an option. Because, I feel like those are two different experiences, not completely but, different enough since one can still feel romantic attraction and one feels little to none of it. I also think it's over looked/never discussed how much of Ford's struggles with romance can also come from trauma (being ostrochized, bullied, dont even get me STARTED on it post Bill, etc.) which I also relate to, as someone who for mental health related reasons hasn't dated in years. And I've met lots of people, including men, who have struggled with the same thing. I've had my best friend suggest to me multiple times that I might be a lesbian since men seem to scare me (I've tried, I am not one) and idk I just wish there was more space in fandom to discuss how trauma and being nd or even just being on the aroace spectrum (or all 3) might affect someone's dating life instead of just coming to the conclusion of "oh he struggles with women so poor guy must not know he's gay". Not saying if you headcanon Ford as gay that you're wrong, he can literally be whatever, he's not real. I just wish I had more people that shared this point of veiw on his character with me because I resonate with those parts of his character just in different ways.
I also want to preface that it gives me the personal ick that whenever a male character is more effeminate/eccentric people think that it's an automatic precursor to them not liking women. Like, idk I really hate that it's 2024 and people still base their hcs off of that. There are (very few but they exist) straight drag queens. Femininity is not inherently connected to being attracted to men.
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stupidlittlespirit · 4 months ago
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i've seen the "he'd never date a woman" thing with ford so much, which i think about a lot. like it's one thing to just headcanon him as gay but there are a lot of posts where internalized or blatant misogyny shine bright. one i saw straight up had multiple people going "he respects women too much to want to date/fuck them" like hello? do you realize what you are implying ab real women when you say that?
i'm not great at articulating my thoughts but i think it's especially prominent with ford because of his intelligence + unconventional demeanor. he's off-putting and a genius and didn't want to give up his work to settle down into a standard marriage with kids. women can't be weird or smart in the same way men can for example and all women want the typical white picket fence nuclear family american dream. therefore you are off your gourd if you think he'd ever want to be with a woman. so there’s that on top of the already rampant misogyny present in fandom spaces with shipping especially.
there's also the whole "gibe the oracle your phone number" / "i miss dimension 52" that could have some implications if you want but ig i can't blame people for forgetting jeselbraum because hirsch barely expands on her LOL. but basically it’s all up to interpretation and it really isn’t all that wild to think he could be attracted to women.
personally i just enjoy projecting my own sexuality onto him. “what gender are you attracted to?” don’t care. can i show you my isopod colonies. “how would you describe your sexual attraction?” uhhhhhhhhhhh (<- is probably demisexual)
So, I deleted my post because I felt like I was rehashing points I'd previously made a million times before, but I stand by it.
I want to address what you said and then I want to kind of go on a tangent (shocker, I know) about the interpretation of GF at large because I've been engaging with a lot of Lynch stuff recently, who we know was by and large the most influential person for Hirsch, and one of the biggest things around Lynch's work is the beauty of subjectiveness. I think Hirsch carries that legacy with him at the heart of his work.
So yeah, the comments about Ford 'respecting women too much' is insane. If anyone thinks that they are probably the kind of person who doesn't respect a woman anyway. If your hands sully the one you touch, perhaps your hands were not so clean to begin with, yknow? That's the vibe I always get with those kinds of comments.
Society approaches women so differently from men in this regard, as you said. Where a man is 'quirky' and 'cool', a woman is 'annoying' or 'trying too hard'. She suffers for her differences where as he profits for them. She can only commit the crime of being Cringe, and in my experience, people will forgive many things but never that.
There is certainly merit in the way in which a lot of people recognise that Ford is partial to things that are 'weird' or that are shunned by society, especially because of his hands, and that plays well into Queer culture. It's a feeling most of us (if not all of us) experience. So I can see where there connection comes and it's totally cool to hold that belief. Queer is BIG umbrella and I think he falls under it myself, what with the ace/aro stuff. We're given much more canon evidence of him being ace/aro, in fact, than of anything else. I maintain personally that canon Ford is asexual and aromantic, and that romance doesn't factor into his life in the way it does for 'normal' people. It's why when Bill mentions that quiz Ford does in his dreams in TBoB it makes me think of my own struggles with asexuality: "I'm not normal, everyone else is feeling this type of way and I'm feeling that type of way. There's something wrong with me. I'm weird. I need answers." It feels very much like Ford is attempting to understand that side of himself and is very afraid of the answer.
The Oracle stuff makes me so sad it was never expanded on more. I really love Jheselbraum and it felt like she was one of the first people that Ford met who was of higher intelligence than him, and who actually did just want to help. She extended an extreme kindness to him. Whether it was more than that doesn't even really matter. There was still a relationship formed there that can't be discounted. But again, it can be interpreted in lots of different ways.
This is the other thing. There's nothing wrong with projecting yourself onto your favourite character. We all do it. I do it. It's fun and it brings comfort. And that's okay! But that means we can all do it. So it's unfair for someone else to say "you're wrong for thinking XYZ about Ford" because we're all just kids in a sandbox playing house with these characters. You can't gatekeep someone else's enjoyment.
You can believe Ford is gay. You can believe Ford is ace. You can believe Ford is whatever you want him to be, but what you can't do is then rescind that privilege from someone else just because you don't like it or because it makes you feel better about yourself to punch down on someone else. People are entitled to their own interpretations of media, even if they make you feel uncomfortable or whatever.
Which brings us onto Lynch. Now, I'm not a huge surrealist fan, I like Lynch most for the person that he was (ugh I'm still so sad to type that). One of the biggest things about him was that he valued the intelligence of his audience and respected them enough to allow them the space to interpret his works as they saw fit. He never wanted to define his films in a way that would prevent another person from taking their own meaning from it. There was no definition, only feeling.
There's a clip of him being asked to expand on his meaning for one of his films, I forget which one, and he just replies "no". It's so fucking good because that, to me, is art. It is fundamentally subjective in its existence and the way I view something is not going to be the way someone else does, so why take that interpretation away from one to give to another just for their approval? We may align in thoughts but the way we process the media is going to be entirely different. Why? Because we're different people. Our experiences throughout our lives have informed the way we interact with things.
I think Alex Hirsch enjoys other people making their own interpretations of his work in a similar way. Just as Lynch does. Hirsch wants you, the audience, to derive personal meaning. He doesn't need (or even want) to tell you how to engage with the themes because why would he? It would only make him work harder to get a simpler point across and it would risk alienating parts of his audience. He wants the audience to connect and to find their own familiarities, and he respects his audience enough to give them the space to let them do that. He's often evasive when he's asked to tie things down firmly. To be honest, I think he should be braver in just saying "no, I don't want to answer that" sometimes. You can tell he wants to but he also wants to engage with people so it can be hard.
People are very desperate to want to have answers in black and white. They need things to be canon in order to feel vindicated, when in actual fact, an idea is just as legitimate when it comes to fiction. Fiction IS an idea. It isn't tangible and therefore cannot be quantified, so it can be interpreted however.
Anyway, by forcing your interpretation of the work onto others (ie. 'Ford would never', 'Stan would never' etc), I think you fundamentally misunderstand what the purpose of the work is. You're taking away the light of other people because you're scared yours doesn't shine bright enough. And you're scared because other people previously took your light away, but all you're doing is repeating the cycle and taking away from the rest of us.
Your ideas can coexist with others. No one is right and in that, everyone is right. Does that make sense? Idk.
I voice my opinions of disliking certain ways the fandom engages with elements of the show, but I don't think they have less right to have those ideas than I do to have my own. I interpret Bill as one way and someone else will interpret him another. That's okay. You're allowed to do that. But I don't think you're allowed to be actively vicious to others over it.
Engage with honesty and recognise that other people enjoys things in different ways, and it's okay not to control the narrative of that sometimes.
I have my criticisms of Hirsch but I also have a lot of love for the guy, and one of the biggest things I respect about him is him allowing us to draw our own beliefs. Do I think he could stand to do some things better? Yes. But that doesn't mean I don't love what I already have from his work.
I'm not sure if this makes sense, I'm having a bit of a Day, but I hope it at least reads well enough to convey my meaning.
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actually making a more seriouser gravity falls au that isnt just green bill with very, very long thumbs, but while im doing that heres some stupid ideas
Billford, but mort and king julian dynamic. You decide which way in your mind (:
bill but hes got that weird flamboyant gay personality, everything else is the same though, still some weird multiversal anarchist that wants to destroy everything
Bill, but normal and he's that one picture of rounded spongebob. You know the one.
Bill but hes a megagon and he gets really mad if you call him a circle even though it Does Not Matter
Bill but hes real and likes me :(
Ford but he has five fingers. To compensate, the normal amount of fingers for people there is four, and Bill has 3 fingers. Y'know what, just lower everyone's finger count by 1.
Ford but he's straight (the portal does not get built)
And finally billford but they both go out to weenie hut jr and sing the goofy goober song. Thats it, nothing else canon divergent, except like a naruto swingset flashback like every other episode Ford does something, to the weenie hut jrs.
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ophiespeaks · 9 months ago
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i am, once again, crawling back to gravity falls. i’ve stayed out of the loop so i could explore thisisnotawebsitedotcom by myself, and here are some of my authentic discoveries: (I don’t know if any of these are even new, knowing the fandom you probably figured all of these out the day it dropped tbh)
-“SOOS” gives a document of how he and his gf are doing running the mystery shack, including a goat train that runs through the forest (i love them)
-“TADSTRANGE” gives an erotic bread montage, because why not
-“PINATA” gives an irl video narrated by bill of a little girl beating the shit out of a bill cipher pinata
-“EVENHISLIESARELIES” i was spoonfed this one but bill is astronomically down bad for ford and it’s literally canon??? “because winning made him feel special. and good god, did he want to feel special” bill cipher your gay is showing.
-“WADDLES” leads to a pig adoption website
-“SEASONTHREE” says season 2, “SEASONTWO” says season 1, and “SEASONONE” says season -1: anti-gravity falls.
-“PACIFICA” tells us that the northwests still keep tapestries of bill, perhaps they could/would have something to do with his return??? pacifica and a “friend” destroyed everything with bill’s triangle symbol on it though, she’s a real one.
-“PLATINUMPAZ” is a code you’re given discreetly upon entering the aforementioned “PACIFICA.” This document is written like fan fiction, but obviously it’s canon, and details pacifica’s experience following northwest mansion mystery. It’s a longer document but essentially pacifica SIKES bill cipher like the girlboss she is when he tries to make a dream deal with her.
-“PINES” just says “a good family tree” lmao
-“SIXER” case file on Ford’s hand, written by (?) someone in the us government, apparently even as far back as when the Stans were 18, the government was working on cloning, so there’s that. Also, Ford is a finger donor!
-“BLINDEYE” gives one of those eye doctor letter tests, VERY blurry. if there’s a code here my blind ass hasn’t been able to decipher it. EDIT: it’s not blurry when you first try it!!! if you click on it it becomes blurry and i no longer know what the letters are.
-“MATPAT” and “GAMETHEORY” matthew patrick i am in your walls. it’s a video of beloved internet dad, Matpat from the Theory channels, saying we’re on our own for this one. Mathew if you don’t make a retirement special when this is all over, spoon-feeding me the answers i will do something illegal. Also, one of the notes on his board seems to read “abigail northwest,” but it’s not a code you can enter, so i’m not sure what it means.
-“GRAVITYFALLS” says ‘never heard of it’, alex hirsch when i catch you alex hirsch
-“MABEL” adds stickers and stars to the screen, eventually saying ‘lab now fully mabelized’ they stay there forever even if you relog the website.
-“DIPPER” tells pine tree to stare at the page for thirteen hours. spamming it changes the note, telling dipper he’s getting closer, but eventually the whole thing blacks out.
-“STANFORD” and “FORD” brings up the same page as “SIXER”, they are one and the same after all.
-“MCGUCKET” and “FIDDLEFORD” link to Cotton Eyed Joe by Rednex
-“STANLEY” and “STAN” links to ebay listings of brass knuckles
-“BILL” links to a sesame street video from 1969, jazzy triangle meets a square square. BillFord canon??? meanwhile, “CIPHER” and “BILLCIPHER”leads to the wikipedia page for the Eye of Providence, or the eye that watches the work of mankind.
-“GIDEON” leads to a google search of sweat-resistant bolo ties
-“LOVE” opens a book called ‘the love triangle”, tapping on it starts an audiobook of the first page of this book, detailing the narrator falling in love with bill cipher in a romantic period-piece. 10/10, but too short. give me the whole book.
-“GOD” links to a video of an Axolotl swimming in front of a submerged bill cipher statue. upon entering “GOD” again, the video does not play, some of the other videos behave in the same way such as “MATPAT.”
-“BLENDIN” responds with ‘time agent lost and presumed incompetent’
-“WEIRD” plays a video of Weird Al Yankovic yelling about how he’s trapped inside of the computer, and he calls for bill to help him. imagine my shock and horror coming across this the vanilla way, by just trying codes until something happens.
-“WEIRDMAGEDDON” is a newspaper clipping that shows nothing happened yesterday, soos got his head stuck in a honey pot and promptly said ‘and i’d do it again.”
-“TOBYDETERMINED” leads to a google search of ‘restraining order’
-“ROBBIE” pulls up AIM messages between him and thomson, detailing their experience ghost hunting for bill because robbie thinks bill will have to grant them three wishes. included is a great drawing in camcorder style of them running away from an eldritch-looking bill. included, but seemingly not sent, are messages in the text box, and it seems we’re reading from thompson’s perspective. it vaguely alludes that bill may be operating inside of thompson??? erm what the sigma?
-“SKIBIDI” “RIZZ” “FORTNITE” and “GYATT” revokes ur life privileges, but “SIGMA” does nothing.
-“QUESTION” responds with ‘answer’ and vice versa.
-“SCIENTOLOGY” responds with ‘suppressive person detected,” don’t ask why i tried scientology, i was going through science-themed inputs and it came to me like a vision.
-“ALEX” and “ALEXHIRSCH” link to a google search of ‘flannel.’ alex hirsch is lumberjack???
-“JOURNAL 3” responds with ‘the journal for me.’
-“JOURNAL 2” responds with ‘the journal for you’
-“JOURNAL 1” responds with “the journal of fun”
-“SEX” “FUCK” “SHIT” and other curses gives a pop-up that says “not S&P approved, wash your mouth out with soap.”
-“WHOAREYOU” responds with ‘i could ask you the same question’
-“REALITY” responds with ‘is an illusion’
-“FBI” and “CIA” responds with ‘your webcam is on. we are watching.’
-“HOLOGRAM” responds with ‘universe’ and vice versa.
-“SCARY” gives a R.L Stine goosebumps knockoff called The Book Of Bill, with the tagline ‘can you survive the tri-strangler?’ and it seems like it should be an audiobook like the “LOVE” entry, but i can’t hear any audio.
-“THEBOOKOFBILL” responds with ‘hide it under shirt during pledge of allegiance’ ???WHAT???
-“MASON” brings up a note about anagrams, assuredly written in-part by Dipper. idk if mason is even canon i always just assumed it was tbh.
-“LIFE” responds with ‘life:72% complete. now loading death.’
-“DEATH” responds with ‘life’s goth cousin’
-“DADDY” “BABY” and “MOMMY” (listen i was trying anything that came to mind) responds with a pop-up of a baby-bill cipher in an ultrasound, and a message that says ‘congrats! guess what’s growing inside you right now? see you in nine months, papa!’ NEW SEASON IN NINE MONTHS CONFIRMED???? (/j) also— mpreg is gravity falls canon???
———
if i was alex hirsch, these are inputs i would add because i was SHOCKED they WEREN’T there:
-“4 8 15 16 23 42” inputting that into an old-style computer should yield some kind of easter egg. LOST was too big of a cultural phenomena for it to not be a secret code here.
-“CANDY” and “GRENDA.” alex you thought of skibidi but not MABELS ONLY TWO FRIENDS???
-“TWINS” seriously this is like the main thing that keeps repeating, even just linking to a wiki page would be rewarding.
-typing in cryptids should link to pages for them, at least. imagine my shock when i typed in “BIGFOOT” to no avail.
-“SEEYOUNEXTSUMMER” should’ve been an easy one tbh
-“PINETREE” “SHOOTINGSTAR” etc. could just link to the same thing as entering their respective names, like “DIPPER” and “MABEL” respectively.
-“HINT” should do something, even if it just tells you no.
-“?” having no results is bonkers
-“SANSUNDERTALE” would be really funny i think
-“THETRUTH” should respond with ‘is out there’
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(forgive me for complaining through your inbox but you have further reach than me) I'm so tired of seeing "jokes" that amount to just fiddleford being a Christian and ridiculing Ford for not being Christian. like yeah yeah Ford summoned a demon but maybe stop being like "haha fidds tells Ford (a canonically Jewish man) to accept Jesus into his heart" and thinking that's like. a joke.
no for real i dont know why people keep thinking this kind of shit is funny and not deeply uncomfortable. i just blocked someone the other day who did this quote unquote joke where fiddleford and ford agree to stop being gay for "jesus's sake" like im for real going to start hitting people with a big bat that says "HES JEWISH"
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oakgreenoak · 5 months ago
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3, 7, 8, any fandom. DENT KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💥💥💥💥
3. description or screenshot of the worst take you’ve seen on tumblr
I have seen. so many. so many Takes in my time. lessee if i can think of some
H2G2 – Maybe the guy that sent an anon to potato-lord that insisted that Douglas Adams was wrong about Ford Prefect (his own character) being smart and insisted he’s actually stupid.
I could also easily say any of the takes the legendary BEP left in our server in the scant time she was there but that's cheating bc it's not tumblr. "Arthur can't be gay because he had no reason to be closeted in 1970s England he would have been Cool actually" lives in my head rent free tho
Pokemon – “Genderbending is transphobic somehow” discourse with the added dumbass flair of, almost verbatim, “If you want to ship Red with a female version of Green, Daisy is right there”; ok so i guess we’re forgetting daisy is her own independent character w a different personality and character dynamics than her brother? Real progressive of you, person who bitches all the time about how being too busy with yaoi to draw/write female characters is sexist.
MHA – I avoid reading MHA tumblr or reddit takes as much as possible. I value my sanity.
7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because of how the fandom acts about them?
HONESTLY all of these are characters i already didn’t really jive with in canon bc shitty fans cant easily turn me against a character I like on their own but they can absolutely make me resent a character i already didn’t gel with
H2G2 – Fenchurch. just… Fenchurch.
Pokemon – RUBY. Pokespe fucking Ruby. He’s an annoying character to begin with – I could go on a fuckin rant about all the shit I don’t like about rs arc and like ¾ of it’s his fault in some manner. but people act like he’s an amazing subversive character and like the fuckin personality switch reveal wasn’t one of the most stupid sexist fuckin things put to paper. He’d be better if he was just gay and didn’t have a freudian reason for it.
MHA – HONESTLY. Toga Himiko. like ok i do think that the epilogue did her super dirty but in general i just do not like her but shes EVERYWHERE. the most annoying kinds of people adore the boring yandere character
8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about
H2G2 – book 4 isn’t good! the romance isn’t cute! it’s just another example of “female character exists Solely to be love interest/reward for male protagonist” and it’s Grody. sorry not sorry for fenchcourse on main
Pokemon – answered!
MHA – Bakugou not facing punitive justice for being a bully in middle school is, like, kinda the point (the teachers/society in general didn’t care what he did then because he was Privileged and Deku’s quirklessness is basically an x-men style allegory for disability/being a minority.) He doesn’t however still “need to face consequences” because like. his entire character arc from the sludge villain up to the apology is him repeatedly Facing Consequences For His Shitty Actions. the narrative is constantly beating his ass. this is also Kinda The Point. anime fans read a book challenge
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