#GHOST YOU ARE SO KIND. TOO KIND EVEN.
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^^ My reaction when I saw this in my inbox this afternoon no lie
AHHHHH LOOK AT HER LITTLE FACE AND HER HAIR IM SMOOCHIGN HER
THIS IS SO SWEET THANK YOU SO MUCH ADHASJKFHLK 😭 🥰 💙 💜
#ghostoffuturespast#GHOST YOU ARE SO KIND. TOO KIND EVEN.#Our annual media project just launched this week and this was the best pickmeup#VALERIE RILEY IS HOLDING YOUR HAND AND SWINGING IT SLIGHTLY AS Y'ALL WALK TO THE DINER FOR LUNCH#aldi speaks#Riley Aldana
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Question for the DP fandom:
Do you think Danny’s hair turns white when it falls out? It’s technically dead cells anyway but when it naturally falls off his head, do you think it turns white? Because I think it would be hilarious if his hairbrush just has white hair, no black strands whatsoever, and his significant other thought the worst until they know his secret.
#danny phantom#dp x dc#dc x dp#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc crossover#danny fenton#dc x dp au#sorry it’s a no thoughts head empty kind of night#I know it’s a dumb thing to think about#but it was a shower thought and sometimes those are good#I just think it could bring so much angst to the plot#any plot#like Tim or Damian or whoever you want his significant other to be could think the worst#it would be something they’d notice for sure#could even be Tucker until Sam reminds him that he’s an idiot and their idiot boyfriend turns into a ghost#or it could be another small thing Jazz has to explain away to their parents#she makes up a whole person that is friends with Danny and it becomes a thing#I know it’s gaslighting and I’m not sure she’d do it but it’d be funny#his name is Garrett and he’s one of Danny’s best friends mom. Jeez how do you not know this#or what if Jason’s hair turns white too and that’s when it clicks for Jazz that he is not completely human#if Jazz is liminal her hair could be blue and boy would that be fun to explain#HER HAIR IS BLUE AND SHE HAS FEELINGS ABOUT IT OKAY#all caps on purpose#because I for sure would be freaking out if my hair was the wrong color in the hairbrush#I would purposely pluck a strand and watch it change then freak out#anger management ship#hardcover ship#everlasting trio
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oh pallas and agnes power dynamic you really are SO unbelievably fucked,,,,,
#haven’t been able to write in days so i am posting instead. forgive me.#it’s just so. like. okay pallas has all of the material power here that’s not a question they’ve got much stronger magic they#know how the library works they’re directly placed in a mentorship role at the beginning re agnes she depends on them#for everything.#but also#pallas is very much Not Doing Well mentally (<- understatement of the century) and is pathologically incapable of processing their own#emotions related to this AT ALL. and in the process of trying very very hard to get to Know pallas (so pallas will Like her so pallas will#want to keep her alive) agnes kind of comes to understand a lot of pallas’s issues even better than pallas does and pallas starts to depend#on her for emotional support in a way they NEVER have with anyone else.#and pallas’s ability to show vulnerability has been soooo wrecked beyond belief that to them doing things like sharing part#of their backstory and being visibily hurt around someone is tantamount to placing a knife in someone’s hand and#then circling all of their weak points with a giant red marker while going ‘HEY STAB HERE’#so in their mind by doing this they’re giving agnes an IMMENSE amount of power over them like enough to kill them dead even though very#little else has changed about their dynamic. so pallas believes that they’re standing on much more equal ground then they really are#and agnes partly believes it too she thinks that by seeing this much of how broken down pallas is she’s finally found the balance in their#relationship she’s finally found a way to make it stable. and yeah. to some extent this is true!#pallas DOES listen to agnes more than any other person agnes IS the first person in years to understand them this much pallas’s dependence#on her for their mental wellbeing DOES give her some measure of power over them. but that power is given out on pallas’s terms is the thing#whether they’re aware of that or not. agnes wouldn’t have anything if pallas didn’t actively choose to be vulnerable with her there’d be#no way she’d learn about anything no way she’d get to play this role in their life#they believe that this thing is much more equal much more sustainable than it really is (pallas especially) and they’re#literally all each other have#grabs your face are you listening THEYRE ALL EACH OTHER HAVE IN THIS PLACE THEYRE BOTH IN SUCH HORRIFIC SITUATIONS AND THEY R EATING#EACHOTGER TO SURVIVE!!!!#head in fucking hands#wip: ghost story#pallas and agnes
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Thinking about a version of Danny who actually has the good sense to hide his identity. He has an astronaut helmet with stars reflected on the screen and a spirit box on his hip that acts as a kind of voice modulator; he only goes by Phantom rather than Danny Phantom and he actually puts some effort into lying.
#danny phantom#a spirit box is a small device that flips rapidly through radio frequencies to help contact ghosts#the sound is rather unique#Danny has a kind of ghostly aura similar to a fey glamor which keeps people from looking at him too closely#basically it's just easier not to question him and unless you set out to do so with some intention#the stronger he gets the harder it gets to investigate him#even his lying gets harder to detect#even if he isn't all that convincing
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the last unicorn post from earlier has me thinking about the master. that yana is still in there, you know? is still someone he was, if even for a brief flash across the life of a time lord. there’s no way to unlive that life. there are ways to twist it later, sure, to make utopia into hell on earth. but the life was lived. in much the same way that the doctor can remember, can feel, the love he held onto as john smith even as that life is ripped out of his hands. the doctor choose denial and then grief and then to shutter it all away. and so john smith died, and so professor yana died, and the doctor and the master live on. the doctor has done this before, and he lives in orbit around humanity, trying to keep the best parts of them and hold them deep enough to take root (which he can pretend he gets to choose, as a time lord. as a human, it all floods in and can’t be dug back out.) but what about the master, right?
to borrow a turn of phrase: i think there are two time lords left in the universe, and they both learned how to regret.
#regret here meaning less feeling the emotion of actual regret obviously because time lords do not actually funxtion on unicorn rules. they#already get sad just fine on their own. no humanity needed for that.#but i dont know. i just dont think he brushed it off so easily. i think he did a hell of a job convincing himself he did.#and what better way then to twist his own great works and destroy the species he was working so hard to save at the end of the universe.#but what about the knowledge that he *could* be that person. that somewhere in him exists a version that wanted to save people.#a version that is painfully too much like the doctor. even. now is that part worse or better than the human part?#but if past regenerations are ghosts i think yana deserves a haunt.#anyway maybe ignore this one im rambling about nothing here#theres just. i dont know. what if you were the last of your kind and in surviving you made yourself Not Like Them in a way you’ll never#escape.#i mean doctor who is just so concerned with all these plots about hybrids and children of the tardis and clones and What Makes A Time Lord.#but they’re so obsessed with it in just. a very Lore way. is what it feels like. we get brushes of more like with jenny and how she’s#physically a time lord and the doctor denies her that inheritance. a shared suffering…#but me myself im just fascinated with the doctor and the master as the time lords who survived. but they survived Wrong#its. its. children of gallifrey that don’t belong to her anymore. you know?#i dont care if river’s got time lord dna!!! or the metacrisis is physically human!!! i dont care!!! talk to me about what it means beyond#their blood and bones!!! what’s it like to have your sense of self stripped from you like that!!!#what’s it like when so much of you is the shed skin of time lords past. but one of you was human. one of you was painfully *humiliatingly*#human!!!#enough about how much dna you need to count as a time lord. i want to know how much they can mutate until they can’t be recognized as one.#does that make sense?
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would you recommend ace attorney
Yes, definitely, absolutely
Some out of context screenshots from the original trilogy
#but to answer honestly. I do recommend it. all first 3 games (I haven't had the time to play the rest so I can't say anything about them)#but ace attorney is a visual novel game. technically 'only dialogue' and that isn't everyones cup of tea#it's very funny tho. and the characters are very likable. the plot is nice (although some parts can get a bit repetitive)#but yes. do give it a try. it's more about the plot than the gameplay if that makes sense#one of my favorite games of all time honestly. give ghost trick a try too if you want. it's very good as well#I guess you should try to go in the games 'blind'. no spoilers. but whatever you want#ace attorney#not art#if you do end up playing it (or watching the gameplay on YouTube idk) feel free to tell me if you liked it :)#I feel like I'm the least qualified person to ask for any kind of recommendation but then I remembered what some of my friends recommend me#to watch/play and I feel better about my taste in media#even if you don't like the game I really recommend you listen the the soundtrack of the great ace attorney
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#ok I’m still on my bullshit but after this THEN I’m going to drop it lol#because he absolutely doesn’t deserve the air he’s desperately seeking#but the thing about him teasing a track list is that he’s obviously baiting the swifties for engagement and the thrill of the controversy#(which is why he did the bit in the podcast the other week too even though he claimed not to care or whatever)#and it goes either one of two ways#either it’s all a bit and there’s nothing really about Taylor on his new album because he’d be telling on himself#or he does his own expose and makes it about her even when he said it was beneath him#either way it just gets swifties mad and keeps his name out there#and gives him the edgelord fuckboi validation he craves#but the problem is that there probably isn’t anything he can ‘reveal’ for shock value that Taylor hasn’t already done herself#(I say probably… you never know)#so she’s already kind of cut him off at the knees#and tbh i feel like anything else he could possibly reveal would by and large just make him look like an asshole#cause what’s he going to do… write about how she was obviously in love with him? ok but he still factually ghosted her after three weeks#(I say ‘obviously’ as in the way he writes her in his own words… I’m not saying anything about her feelings about it)#so he still comes out looking like either a bad guy or a coward on balance#and like what… that he seduced the troubled pop star? ok well she went there first#like he can give details but that’d be like a kiss and tell#but ultimately it’s going to be he said she said#and she said it first and said it best so it’ll knock the wind out of his sails regardless#which is what i was getting at earlier about writing and releasing WCS#it draws the poison out and solidifies agency#so anyway he’s a dumbass narcissist and probably ********* and who the fuck cares what he does lol#he just wants people to take the bait#goodnight tumblr
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do y'all even know how easy it would be to lie about comic books on here... nobody else is out here reading all of marvel 2099 on the reg, and the official wikis are all still full of rampant misinformation to this day-- like, obviously i wouldn't, but. seriously. constantly i am haunted by the knowledge that if i were a Worse Person it would be so easy to get away with,,
#talking tag#i could be So Evil. i could be So Evil and Tell Lies#i Cant. it would be betraying my autism and set off The Bomb but in THEORY............#this post is Intended 2 be light-hearted not. like. Existential lol#mostly poking fun at myself here. the Reason i Know So Much abt marvel 2099 isn't because i Love It i just have a Specific special interest#AND IT'S NOT EVEN THE WHOLE IMPRINT... could you imagine how much worse my life would be if i had latched onto Ravage instead.#god. lucked OUT w/ sm2099. it's like. the only one that's fun to actively read/reread too lol#ghost rider 2099 is Fun but. in a v exaggeratedly over-the-top most of the time kind of way. i love zero in Small Doses hes 19 dead & Angry#and the book does not Stay fun :pensive:
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"you were born evil" but you still named her agatha.
thinking about that process, because it took 18 years right. you have a baby and you call her good and she turns out to be smarter than you, more powerful than you, and it scares you, you dont know how to handle that especially in a world that hates you and her already. the things about her that scare you, will scare the outside world who understands even less than you do ten times more. you dont know how to protect her so you try to control her which is like number one bad idea human response to things that scare us.
obviously this backfires and she gets even more furious in her quest for knowledge, every door you close she finds a window, every place you warn away from she gets into, talking to people she shouldnt be talking to, trying out magic she shouldnt be trying. every step she takes is one further out of your control, further out of anyone's control, every new thing she learns makes her dangerous, puts her in danger, puts your coven in danger, shes exposing all of you along with herself. shes in danger, shes a danger, shes a teenager and she knows more than you, of course shes not gonna listen to you anymore, about anything. of course shes not gonna hear a warning, and if she did she wouldnt take it, just to spite you.
what are you gonna do? youre not the only one whos scared. of her, for her. youve got an entire coven getting panicky about the way shes exposing all of you, the risks shes taking that she may or may not be able to fully understand (maybe shes never seen one of you burned before, maybe shes her own first). and if she were on her own that would be her decision to make, but you are still responsible for your coven and you are responsible for her, for her safety and for the threat she poses. so what do you do? do you even have a choice? or is this just where the mob turns. kick a scapegoat onto a pyre and hope fortune turns for the rest of us. if she cant stick to the rules in place for the safety of all, then shes a ticking timebomb. if it's not her at the stake, sooner or later it's all of you. so what can you do? what are you expected to do?
punish agatha.
#dont remember who i saw say it but when agatha is recruiting sharon and she pauses for a moment before going yoohoo#making peace with the fact that shes definitely most likely gonna kill this lady along with the witches#*points at her mother here*#anyway i dont know what the fuck like went on this is just one version#but im thinking of her ghost and like 'emotion ties them to this plane' like yeAH NO SHIT fhkjhgkj#the amount of emotion that mustve been going on here#i imagine there must have been a lot of self-convincing before her mother got to this point#i imagine there werent a lot of choices and she was kind of backed into a corner and she just had to find every reason to make this possibl#to be able to do THIS#thats the only way right?#she seems to be the leader. idk if covens have leaders maybe shes just leading here bc it's her daughter thats on trial#or maybe agatha just gets it from her mother#but like if she hadnt gone first then maybe the coven wouldve done this ANYWAY without her right?#and then she'd have lost control of the coven. maybe kicked out. her daughter would be killed either way like#idk if she considered taking agatha and fleeing just the two of them. if she rejected that as too dangerous. safety in numbers#they'd get killed if it was just the two of them#or if she never even considered it. i do get a sort of.....conforming vibe from her. which isnt weird bc standing out or losing community#is p dangerous right in the environment they live here#im more inclined to imagine her trying to teach agatha to just like. shut up. hide. conform. dont stand out. whatever you do DONT push the#boundaries#bc if you end up outside of them youre fucking toast#i can imagine that more as her attempted strategy than running off with agatha#but like obviously that wouldnt work bc agatha wants to push boundaries she wants to push boundaries so bad#i get a feeling she wants to push boundaries like the doctor wants to press buttons#yaz voice: you'd hit a hornets nest just to see what happens
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it's kind of weird to me that they didn't bother releasing sushi and tempura internationally at all but at the same time i'm kinda glad they didn't cuz like. yo-kai watch was financially failing in the west by the time 3 released. i feel like if they had released sushi and tempura the franchise would've completely tanked before we got sukiyaki which would've sucked. honestly if anything i feel like it's more surprising that we got all three versions of 2 instead of them just releasing psychic specters but tbf i think yo-kai watch was doing well in the west when 2 released. 2 is just inexplicably what killed the franchise despite being a masterpiece-
#puppy rambles#yo-kai watch#yw3#yw2#idk. i have a lot of thoughts on this stuff#still upset i didn't find out 3 released in america until a while after it did :/ could've gotten a physical copy if i'd found out earlier#but alas. i'm just stuck with a boring digital version. i mean the digital versions of yo-kai watch games are better but like. still#i never got maginyan in blasters even though i could've. the code or whatever was on the receipt but my mom bought it for me#from the nintendo website. and i don't think she checked it and i don't think i found out that was where it was until a bit after i got it-#i did get machonyan and jibanyan t/komasan t's codes entered though so i can get them on any playthrough now#unless i put the sd card in another 3ds since apparently it's system-based instead of sd card based??? which is really stupid#but you can probably bypass that with cfw and i do plan on modding my 3ds eventually#it'll just be a process cuz i don't have an sd card slot on my computer and idk if my moms would be willing to help#so i'll probably have to get a separate sd card reader or whatever. which i do think my moms would be okay with i mean#it's my system and they're cool with piracy lfskdjfjkfsdkljfd-#my moms are so cool <3 i just wish i could get them interested in yo-kai watch but they don't seem to care lfskdjfkjsfdjlksfd-#they determined the battle system doesn't sound fun but i might've just described it badly#i mean tbf. it is very annoying sometimes. especially when my healer just will not heal the other yo-kai#''DO YOUR FUCKING JOB TATTLECAST STOP LOAFING'' -me playing 2#that being said if 1's switch port ever releases in america i am totally playing it on the tv#i WILL force my moms to watch me play funni ghost game whether they like it or not /lh#if we do ever get 1's switch port i hope they make it a collection of some kind with 2 and 3 remasters too i would buy that in a heartbeat#i mean obviously i will buy any american-released yo-kai watch stuff in a heartbeat aside from maaaaaybe y-school heroes#(i'm sorry y-school heroes fans i just cannot get into it. from concept alone it sounds like i would not enjoy it)#maybe sangokushi too if we ever get that but i feel like we probably won't#idk if the franchise it's a crossover with is popular enough in america for that#i hope we get more english yo-kai watch content once ghost craft releases. kinda feel like it's testing the waters tbh#i know it's seemingly just a spiritual successor but still#i do hope that it being a spiritual successor doesn't mean yo-kai watch is over. i doubt that it will since like#punipuni still gets semi-frequent updates
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looking back at posts and its so fun seeing exactly which two characters in genshin i was hyperfixated on and that even after like three years it has not changed Once 😭
venti and nameless bard have me wrapped around their fingers istg
#SINCE 2021 !!!!!!!!!!#i think about how much they love each other how much venti seems to idolize the bard to the point that he might seem to be on the same#divinity level as ven is#i think about that ven has carefully guided the citizens of mond to the same values that bard and the rest of old mond wanted it to be#i think about ven never changing his form to keep his friends memory alive even after /two millennia/ of seeing the face you can never get#back in the mirror every day#i think about ven holding his own hands together and pretending for a moment that its someone else holding his#i think !!!!!! about what would happen if the bard had ever perished. if ven would be severely protective and i dare you. try to lay a hand#on a single hair. he has gone through so much and i refuse to let anything take away what he deserves to see#i think about the bard catching the wind as easily as breathing simply bc its not truly “caught”#the wind is simply ever so fond of them that they will not go anywhere else for too long#i think about. the bard cradling a wisp so gently every night that even now warmth seeps in through ventis hand if he pretends enough#i think about a ghost bard who never leaves vens side. who had promised always whenever they departed thatd he leave something for venti to#know hes still there#i think about a bard who breaks down ventis walls with a single tap#bc they know each other as well as they do themselves#i think abt a bard who gently relearns a ven he hasn’t met#i think abt a bard who is angry and spiteful and spitting at the world softening around the wisp who shows nothing but kindness#i think about a bard recognizing ven by a small breeze alone#and i#i simply go bonkers over them you see#lantern says stuff
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thinkbing about. him
#random thoughts#fnaf#rotating him in my mind like an orb or perhapps a microwavable tv dinner#love the idea of a character who for some reason has him in their house and does regular maintenance on him#someone who worked for fazbear fright and fucking. stole him#au where the place wasn't burned down and actually opened and some kid started working there and fucking took his ass#springtrap in my head is like. mostly an animal. running on instinct and ancient programming. only rarely lucid#the kid who took him oh my god. what if someone who was the sibling of one of the five missing kids stole him#and like. they know he's the man behind the slaughter and can remember him from when he was alive#and they take him and keep him running as like a form of torture. because fazbear fright was gonna be shut down and the animatronic#was gonna be destroyed or smth and they were like 'no you son of a bitch not yet'#and they can sometimes see the ghosts of the children and employees who died and henry. but like they're not done#they cant let go. not yet.#cant let him go to the beyond because that would be too merciful for a son of a bitch like him#but springtrap cant really understand whats happening and mostly just sees Some Guy keeping him running so most of his feelings#are positive#when he's semi lucid he tries to kill them#when he recognizes them from before he kind of shuts down#the range is 'friend!!!' to 'i am going to fucking murder you' to 'how did you do in pe today'#like this guy mostly isn't william afton. idk who he is but he isn't him most of the time#i imagine the springtrap suit is a unique model so its hard to get replacement parts for him so most of him is custom at this point#idk what they do with the bones. probably leave them alone for the most part out of fear of him passing on if they got rid of them#he smells like dirt and mildew and restroom deoderizer probably#i imagine their thoughts on him are 'i recognize this mostly isnt the man who killed my sibling so i dont want him to suffer'#'but also i cant handle the idea of even a little of the man who killed my sibling being able to stop suffering'#like this is william's idea of hell. complete depersonalization#they make his stay tolerable. decent maintenance. idk what kind of enrichment he needs#being kept in a basement away from regular social interaction is probably hell for any children's animatronic#so he loves when they come down for maintenance. probably rarely at first and then more frequently as they adjust themself to his presence#idk how he feels about maintenance. probably very used to the feeling of having a dude inside of him lmaooo
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'It makes sense if you think about it. After whatever happened last year.'
Leo stared blankly into the last frame of the youtube video on his screen, leaning his chair back to balance on two legs. The corner of the library he'd tucked himself into for research was quiet enough, with even the cats rarely poking their heads by to check on him. Technically he wasn't looking into anything restricted that he'd need to hide for, but he didn't want the noise to potentially be a distraction.
'The weird thing is that there clearly aren't many ghosts around here.'
He drops the chair back down and looks through the Clash memorials. It's a lot of people. Mostly human. He tabs back over to the recent memorials made for victims of the anomalous inpatient. For a while after that there were quite a few ghosts around the campus and the ruined hospital. Leo could sometimes hear the airy, echoey whispers of their voices when he passed by. One or two were strong enough to be seen. In the days following it got quieter and quieter until the only sounds were the living. He remembered seeing students from a few different houses going to the area now and then. Kusanagi, too.
One of those students was a friend of one of the Vagastrom students--he remembered him bringing them over, convinced something was haunting the area.
Ex-Clementia then.
Darkwick was just laying damn near any ghost on campus to rest without letting them stick around and resolve their business? Even if they aren't dangerous? Kind of scummy, but probably just a precautionary measure. Spirits were a little unpredictable.
'A video would be a bad idea then. Too much publicity.' He's only cruel for no reason when it's funny. There's not really any humor in double-shotting a guy who doesn't deserve it. 'But it'd still be interesting to know what's going on there. I'd just have to find a covert way to ask. . .they might be monitoring our messages too much for me to go through YouTube.'
In person would have to do. At some point. Just another thing on his eternal to-do list! Leo stretched and groaned, listening to the pop of muscle and crack of bone and every other reaction his body gave to the movement.
If Taro Kirisaki(Zenji Kotodama, rather, using his name would probably attract too much attention) was a ghost that meant ghouls' souls were probably still intact enough to leave spirits behind, even if they weren't very strong spirits. More importantly if his ghost was still hanging out after this long it meant whatever demon he'd made a pact with hadn't come for him. That or something kept demons from coming to Darkwick, which was unlikely considering how little was really known about demons. If pact-makers did, at some point, unconsciously(?) consume their demons after making their pacts then the demons' souls probably didn't integrate with their own. Either they were neutralized(erased? Laid to rest?) or they were housed within the body and released on death. And there were no records of unknown S-class anomalies or demons appearing after the death of Taro Kirisaki. He died at Darkwick General, there would have to be a report somewhere if something like that happened. That or it was kept majorly under wraps.
And of course no one wanted to talk about The Clash so asking would be difficult right now. He needed a better rapport with the third and second years to get them to talk. But even Romeo didn't want to talk about it too much, and Leo was one of the only people Romeo trusted right now!
Leo exhaled sharply through his nose.
Why is it that everything kind of interesting was always just out of reach? It was like being edged on entertainment and knowledge. That was only fun when there was a good payoff.
Maybe Zenji would prove to be a good payoff in the end. He probably wouldn't know anything--or he wouldn't tell him anything--but maybe he would at least be entertaining.
#life in darkwick: leo#((i remember hearing a phrase or something probably translated from another language))#((which described someone with sensitive hearing as 'able to hear ghosts'))#((and i like that idea for leo that he can hear ghosts with his stigma even if they're weak))#((so whenever he's around 'the anomalous biwa' he's like. there's a ghost there.))#((and earlier zenji mentioned his youtube channel so i decided 'he can kind of recognize zenji's voice from recordings and he heard the biwa#((and made a connection. and decided to add it to his research pile))#((to give me an excuse to harass ghosts in the future lol))#((ghosts may not necessarily sound like they're speaking without him using his stigma it sounds like echos and wind or other little noises))#((but if he uses his stigma it just turns into normal words.))#((i considered that leo can use his stigma to understand towa more clearly too because it seems like hyde nicolas and haru understand him))#((so maybe it's an exposure thing kind of like when someone has a major speech impediment. you can figure out what they're saying the longer#((you hear them speak. and leo's stigma lets him hear things more clearly so he understands towa a bit with it. i considered that))#((but i've mostly scrapped it lol))#((anyway. have a random leo status update type of deal))
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(sliding beads along my abacus) I mean no matter how you slice it I'm going to have time to draw something for all of my birdmutuals. Let's be generous and say that I have like 15 of them. I think a third of them will not care enough to put out a list, another handful will forget to do it, which means realistically I think I'm going to end up in the ballpark of maybe like. 7. I feel like 30 minutes is plenty of time to drawr a little gift or something. so let's say max case scenario. 12 birdmutuals submit lists. I could knock that out easily in 3 days.
#just thinking thoughts...#like... ok.#sara. kit. fish. wojteka. aris. jeepers. gary. blazinfox. sura. henni. petri. ghost. chiye. mal. vampiregokudera. albino...#ohhh that's 16 already... I know I'm forgetting people... sweats.#well I feel like I can VERY safely cross some people off that list. I mean I would love lists from everyone I just listed#and even anyone who isn't listed#but I think maybe 5 people would realistically submit lists.#like you know submitting lists requires having enough investment in the characters in our lord's year of 2024#which is honestly kind of a tall order so I'm really not worried about having 'too much to draw'#guy who wants people to play with him or something. lol#honestly I could extend this to include my kekk mutuals too. we could have tanabemas.#that would literally only add like. 4 or 5 more people LMAOOOO#globodamorte... bee... sonica... oz. OH and the eternal orsho. and of course kiwi.#haha! kiwi... we would definitely have a holly jolly tanabemas. hahahaha. I'd love to draw kaihen...#OKAY OKAY before I impulsively decide to do this. I think I should sleep on this for 3 days#like if I'm worried about drawing things which are bad (which I honestly just cannot do anymore at this stage of birdrot)#I can just do a second bad drawing. right. the math adds up... 2 bad drawings approx. = 1 good drawing. right.
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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