#First thing I've wrote on my own in awhile

[jjkamochoso]

It's been awhile since I've been in your askbox, it feels nice to be back! Back with another Feitan request of course!! I loved the Shalnark fic you wrote btw, it was pretty in character for your first time writing him and it was really sweet! Anywho, may I please request the same type of Reader I usually do, feminine and into cute gothic Lolita styles, where she drags him along to go shopping for a frilly swimsuit and to the beach, or maybe if they got to stay somewhere nice for a while and indoor pool where it's just them? If you can't tell I'm missing the warmer weather, and even more I'm missing sitting in one of those indoor hot tubs all nice and warm. Most of the plot is up to you, just Feitan x Reader who's ready to go swimming!

Take your time and don't burn yourself out, thank you so much!! ^^ ♡

It’s always nice to be able to take requests again, I miss creating stories for you all!❤️ and I’m very happy to have you back in my inbox with more Feitan content! I miss the summertime too so I had a wonderful time imagining myself shopping for a swimsuit and swimming, especially with Feitan🤭 I hope you love what I’ve written and as always, thanks to everyone for your never ending support and love!!🫶❤️

Fei’s Beach Day

Fluff

Feitan Portor x f!reader

Warnings: none

You closed the door behind you, relishing in the little heat of the room you were staying in as you took off your gloves and hat. Another mission done where you were bundled up in your warmest jacket, fighting the enemy while fighting the snow blowing into your eyes.

You were so done with winter.

You had barely taken a breath of relaxation before Phinks’ number lit up your phone. You released a sigh of exasperation, putting the phone to your ear.

“Hey Phinks,” you said, trying to stop your teeth from chattering.

“Hey y/n! You alright? You sound kinda down.”

“I’m okay, I’m just freaking cold,” you told him, grabbing the almost threadbare blanket from your bed and wrapping it around your shoulders.

“We got another mission from Boss. We’re supposed to meet at a little seaside town and we’ll be staying there for the near future. You’ll be excited to hear it’s south of where you are now.”

“It’s summer there!” you heard Shalnark yell cheerily in the background. You couldn’t hold back your own expression of excitement after hearing that, happily bouncing around your room.

“I’m leaving as soon as I can,” you practically screamed into the phone, already pulling your suitcase out and packing your limited personal items.

Phinks chuckled. “The mission won’t start for a week-”

“That’s fine! I’ll be there early. See you guys eventually!”

You hung up, throwing your cell onto your bed and hurriedly shoving the rest of your belongings in the suitcase. You then made your way to the nearest airport and reserved your spot on the first flight out of town, not wanting to deal with the winter weather longer than you had to.

A flight, a bus ride, and a long walk later, you had finally arrived in the seaside town and you couldn’t have been more relieved. You dropped your things off at the hotel and made your way out of the lobby and into the busy streets. The smell of salt air permeated your nose and you stood under the sun, your skin soaking up the rays. You were lost in your own little world and didn’t notice someone stalking up behind you until you heard their voice in your ear.

“You lucky I no want to hurt you. Better pay attention to surroundings.”

You quickly spun around, your eyes meeting the stormy ones staring back at you.

“Feitan!” you greeted, your fluffy skirt swishing in your excitement. “It’s so good to see you! What are you doing here early?”

“I no want you here by yourself. Strange things happening in this town,” he answered. “Phinks told me you come early so I did too.”

Your heart palpitated at his words, loving that he felt so protective of you.

“So you’re like my chaperone now?” you teased. His eyes narrowed but he said nothing. “Well, first place we’re going is swimsuit shopping because I am in desperate need of something to wear!”

Feitan didn’t have the chance to protest before you grabbed his hand, eagerly pulling him along to the closest clothing store. If it were anyone else manhandling him like that he would’ve killed them in a gruesome manner, but you were different. He actually liked when you took charge and proved to him that you weren’t afraid of him. His entire body felt like it was on fire every time you graced his porcelain skin with your touch and he never wanted the burning sensation to stop.

He was a masochist, after all.

You entered the store and let go of his hand, needing both hands of your own to shop efficiently. Your gaze landed on all the different swimsuits, finding your size in the pile of the ones you liked the most and holding them to your chest. Once you had a large pile of the frilliest swimsuits known to man, you went to try them on, disappearing behind the door of the dressing room. After a few moments, you reappeared in a pink two piece with white piping details.

“So? What do you think?” you asked Feitan.

Feitan was well versed in shopping with you at this point, but he had never helped you find clothing that was so… revealing. He averted his eyes from your figure, his cheeks as warm as the rising temperature outside.

“It fine,” he responded, harsher than he intended. You paid no mind, admiring yourself in the mirror.

“I think you’re right as always. It’s fine, but I can do better! I’m going to try another one!” you chirped. Feitan heard the dressing room door close and only then did he raise his head again, knowing you were out of sight. He both hated and revelled in the way you made him feel, especially while looking like that—like you were some sort of otherworldly being and he was just a lowly man. A lowly man who wanted to selfishly keep you to himself, away from the prying eyes of other men, men who weren’t nearly as despicable as he but were wholly unworthy of witnessing your beauty all the same.

“Okay, what do we think of this one?”

Your emergence from the dressing room took him out of his thoughts and into the present. Feitan didn’t say anything, he couldn’t; his tongue was a jumbled mess inside the dry desert of his mouth.

“I really like it,” you continued, turning away from the mirror in favor of looking at the man in front of you. “How about you?”

Feitan swallowed thickly, his dark robes working overtime as they concealed the sweat that was dripping from his small frame.

“It fine,” he said again, this time not as rudely. You, ever observant, took that to correctly mean he thought you looked amazing. You glimpsed at the price one last time and nodded your head.

“Perfect! This is the one. How about we go test it at the beach?”

Feitan didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know how he would be able to function if he had to bear seeing you in that swimsuit for longer than the minute you tried it on. He didn’t think all of those people should witness such a heavenly sight of you in that swimsuit. It didn’t matter, of course; whatever you wanted to do, you did it, and he would be a fool to think he could ever deny you anything you wanted anyway.

That’s how he found himself at the beach, sand flying into the folds of his ensemble. The cowl was doing a great job of keeping the pesky granules out of his mouth, but it was so unbearably hot that he had to pull it down from his mouth. You smiled softly when you saw the full extent of his face, appreciating his beauty.

“Let’s go to the water,” you suggested, trotting toward the vast blue in front of you.

“I no trust the ocean.”

You stopped, tilting your head. “Why?”

He always thought it was much too open and unpredictable for his taste, but he didn’t confess that.

“That water nasty. Contaminated.”

“Well I’m going in. It’s way too hot out here.”

“You complain when it cold, complaining when it hot. Are you ever happy?” he joked dryly. You rolled your eyes, ignoring him in favor of cooling yourself off. When your feet touched the cold water, you felt an exhilarating tingle up your spine. Wanting to adapt to the temperature quickly, you dunked your whole body in, giggling as the waves crashed into you. Feitan watched carefully from a few feet away from the shore, making sure you didn’t get swept away and he didn’t get wet. His hair and clothing were a black mass on the beach full of a rainbow of colors, yet it was the sight you were most content to look at.

You didn’t know how long you were out splashing and swimming around, more than happy to lose track of time as you enjoyed yourself. Feitan had inched closer and closer to you, the bottom of his outfit now dripping with sea water.

“Feitan, come here! I got something for you,” you called out. He shook his head, not wanting to go further into the water. You respected his wishes, dragging the long trail of seaweed behind you as you approached him.

“Close your eyes and hold out your hands. I think you’ll like this,” you told him. He raised an eyebrow but did as he was told, trusting you. You laid the seaweed across his outstretched hands. “Now open.”

He opened his eyes and looked at the seaweed curiously. “What is this?”

“Seaweed,” you explained. “It’s always at beaches like this.”

“I like it,” he said, squishing it between his fingers. A chilling grin appeared on his lips. “Reminds me of intestines.”

It’s times like those that you remember just how much of a weirdo Feitan really was, but hey, everyone in the Phantom Troupe was at least a little bit strange.

“I’m just glad you like it,” you said.

“Of course. It from you,” he said, your face warming from his praise. “I got you this too.” He dug around in his pocket, presenting you with a closed fist. “Give me hand.”

You did so as something hard landed in your palm. He had given you a beautiful shell, swirled with all sorts of colors and textures.

“Oh Feitan,” you breathed out, “it’s perfect. Thank you.”

“It no big deal,” he scoffed, trying to hide his elation that you loved his gift. You planted a lingering kiss on his cheek and he could no longer tell if he was burning up from the summer heat or from the fire that was blazing in his heart for you. Whatever it was, he was feeling emboldened today.

“You look pretty,” he said matter of factly, catching you off guard while you were studying the seashell, almost dropping the poor thing back into the ocean.

“Oh! Thank you. That means a lot coming from you,” you replied, growing shy. “You look pretty, too.”

As Feitan saw the ocean lap at your body and the water reflect like diamonds in your eyes, for once in his life he wished every day could be summer.

Taglist: @unofficialsapphire

[athletearrhythmia]

Needles coming up again

First wanted to reference back my thoughts on this from awhile ago:

but I also wanted to say some of the comments I'm seeing around aren't oriented to harm reduction, they're just tearing down people who engage in needle play and post it. Which is not going to save anyone. It's going to galvanize and sequester folks which will cascade into riskier behavior.

I guess what gets my goat about it especially is why I've pulled back from a good number of folks, which is engaging in dark cardio play as a means or extension of self harm. People know this stuff is dangerous and stupid, you don't need to remind them. That's not going to "wake them up". Some people by comparison just... like doing it. Neither case will respond to this approach.

I don't offer a definitive solution, i just don't vibe with yelling at people. I appreciate things like folks declaring that they'll disengage from the content: that I think does something.

So here's my additional thoughts to tack on to my last post:

If your perception of reckless behavior is that it doesn't matter because your life is so bad or meaningless that the consequences can't make it worse, you're depressed and you need help. Getting help isn't easy. But you need it.

If you feel a strong desire or need to do this for sexual gratification, you need to find healthier outlets. I struggle with this immensely myself. I'm open about liking and engaging with this content and some of its creators. The best I can do for myself is dark roleplay or using already existing content, and playing with generally safer dark play (which will always carry its own risk). The ideal would be to not find it gratifying. I don't know how to.

You should never engage with someone whose relationship to you is conditional on risking your health-- people you actually talk to or "fans" of your content. Anyone pressuring you to play with needles, especially when you're on the fence or have expressed you don't want to, doesn't have your best interests in mind. If you walk back wanting to do it, regardless of if you ever have done it, avoid the people who don't support your decision.

I'm never not going to end a public discussion of needle play without reemphasizing its danger. The possible bad outcomes are catastrophic and there's almost no way to mitigate the risk.

I'll add as well that the community has an obligation (IMO) to make sure newer or younger participants know how dangerous this kind of play is. Don't allow people to stay naive.

[marthawrites]

"don't shut me out. please"

I hope it is not too late for me to join the celebration ☺️ Congratulations! 💕👏🏼

Thank you sooososo much! You are such a gem and I appreciate all of your fandom love more than you know! I did my best to include a (one shot appropriate) slow burn, angst, and a happy ending. I hope you enjoy this ride MWAH!

Summer's End, Autumn's Beginning

Modern Aemond Targaryen x fem reader

Word Count: 6.3k+

About: A chance encounter with Aemond leads to a whirlwind of emotions. Over the next few months you both fail, in yourselves and in the relationship, and learn from the mistakes.

Includes: Chance encounter, age difference (references to Aemond x Alys) mentions of cheating, allusions to cheating, angst, second chance romance, and smut featuring vaginal fingering, possessive sex, and unprotected protected vaginal sex

Note: Hello lovely reader! This is the longest piece I've wrote in quite awhile - whew! I also feel like it's one of the more ambitious one-shot fics I've worked on/completed. Reader is non-descript. As always, please, enjoy!

read part 2 Between the Covers here

-

I.

There were two things tied for number one on your five-year goal list.

First, be out of your city apartment (preferably as a home owner and not a renter)

Second, have a dog. 

They went hand in hand. One couldn’t happen without the other. So, it was a hard tie and you weren’t willing to budge on either. Until then, to take the edge off your self-proclaimed animal loneliness, you volunteered at a local shelter two nights a week. Mondays and Wednesdays.

While your day job wasn’t a doctor, lawyer, or professional athlete – ones that your family pushed you to have while growing up – it still paid decently and had the potential for career advancement. And! You were able to live on your own. Not having a roommate was worth the dry job description. Besides, your boss was fair and most of your co-workers were friendly; a win win, really.

Tonight, Monday, you finished your shift, went home to change, then headed out to the shelter. Even though it was all volunteer hours you valued punctuality and did your best to get there around the same time each night.

“Hey! You made it!” Arryk called out to you when you stepped inside the building. Chaos sparked all around. He did a great job running and maintaining the schedule, and with the help of volunteers alongside regular staff, it was, more often than not, smooth sailing. Tonight, however, it appeared quite the opposite.

“Hey! Yeah, a few minutes later than usual, sorry!” You said as you walked over to him.

He waved a hand brushing off your apology. “No worries. We had a few people call in today. So, since being short staffed we’re definitely running behind. I know you normally help bathe the dogs with Baela tonight, but can I ask you to do something else instead?” He winced slightly with his question, unsure of your answer. He knew how much you loved Baela and cleaning the dogs!

You squinted at him suspiciously. “Why are you looking at me like that?” You asked, crossing your arms. “You know I won’t administer shots. If I could get over my fear of needles I’d be a veterinarian and not an office worker like I am!” You scrunched your brows before one, all on its own accord, arched up dubiously.

“Ha!” He laughed. “No no no, I know. We have six dogs that need walking tonight. And I don’t think Targaryen can handle all of ‘em.”

“Helaena? She’s back?” You asked, eyes bright with surprise.

“She’s still away for that college trip. It’s her younger brother, Aemond. Have you met him before?”

You’d heard Helaena talk about him, of course, but you’d never met him. Shaking your head, you peered around the shelter looking for anyone else with the Targaryen tell-tale silver-blonde hair. No one caught your eye. “I haven’t. But, I don’t mind.”

“You are a lifesaver!” He praised. “He’s down the west hall getting them ready. Depending on how long you're here afterward, there might be another couple who could use a second walk. Terriers. You know how they are.”

“Happy to help, Arryk!” He was a good guy. You’d always liked him.

“Aemond’s tall, towheaded as the rest of his family, and has an eyepatch. You can’t miss him.” And with that Cargyll switched tasks and got right back to work.

Turning and walking down the west hall, you were happy to say, chaos began to fizzle out. This hall had the larger dogs; no wonder Aemond wouldn’t be able to walk all six at once. Even with the slow turn of summer to autumn sunset wouldn’t be for another three hours. Assuming all went well you’d be able to walk the second batch of dogs, too. 

Down the aisle were five opened doors with each respective dog ready for their walk. Their leashes were hooked onto the door so they couldn’t run amuck. You patted and scratched them, earning yourself more wagging tails, a few happy barks, and some excited licks. Looking to the end of the hall you saw someone who you assumed was your evening walking partner. He was kneeling, talking soothingly to a great big senior hound, while clasping the final buckle of their harness. “Hello, uh-, Aemond?” You called out feeling slightly self-conscious. 

Still kneeling, he turned his head to look up at you. Any softness in his single eye quickly hardened to match the rest of his sharp features. “Hey,” he said, caught off guard by your presence; someone he’d never seen calling him out by name. “Is there something I can help you with?” Slowly, in a single fluid motion, he stood up and the aged dog kept his eyes on him the whole time, panting happily.

Whoa. He was tall. And, at first sight, incredibly good looking: dressed in casual black clothes, long silver hair tied into a braid, with a scar along the left side of his face that you had to tell yourself not to stare at. His mouth was a unique shape, too, and you weren’t sure if he was merely waiting for a response or if he was smirking the tiniest pout at you. “Hi,” you said again with a nervous laugh. You told him your name. “Arryk sent me. Said you could use some help with the walk tonight?” ‘Play it cool, dummy. He’s really handsome, so what? He could be a huge asshole. Play. It. Cool,’ your inner voice said.

Did he have a mechanical eye beneath his patch? The way he looked at you, then, made you feel like he read your thoughts. “Ah. I could certainly use the help,” he said smoothly with a small curve of lip, turning his attention to the three dogs at the front of the hallway. “Wanna take those three?” He asked, looping the big dog’s leash around his wrist. “I mean, you can have any of them as long as I get this guy. He’s my favorite.”

Your pulse raced a little too fast. Clearing your throat, you smiled in an attempt to ease the butterflies in your belly. “I don’t mind. Why is he your favorite?” You turned and began to unclasp leashes from their doors; happy tips and taps of claws growing louder at the pups’ excitement.

“Reminds me of my girl at home,” Aemond replied, adoration clear in his voice. “Big and old, a little stinky, a little slobbery. The best kind, really.”

“Aw, that’s very sweet. I don’t have any pets. I get my fix here,” you laughed. Holding all three dogs in one hand, you pulled the door open with the other. Except, it didn’t open. On instinct, you tried again hoping Aemond didn’t notice.

He strode up next to you with the rest of the dogs in tow, smirking at you for real this time, as he said, “it’s a push door.”

You knew it was a push door. Fuck. He gave you a knowing glance over his shoulder as he walked out, waiting for you to follow along.

II.

You didn’t see Aemond on Wednesday and you couldn’t deny your disappointment when you left for the night. Come to find out you two had been volunteering at the same place for months – only on different days. He tended to be there Tuesdays and Thursdays. 

Monday had been a chance encounter. One you couldn’t shake out of your head. 

Before leaving tonight, however, you took a selfie with Aemond’s favorite old hound. You’d exchanged numbers but hadn’t an excuse to strike up a conversation. Yet. Now, with the selfie as an excuse, you opened a fresh text thread and sent him the photo along with:

Someone missed you tonight! 

While buckling up in your car and getting ready to reverse out of your parking spot, your phone dinged with an incoming message:

Very cute. Will you be there on Monday? Maybe Cargyll will assign up walking duties again.

Your belly flipped. Truthfully, you weren’t expecting him to message back – especially so quickly. Before you could stop yourself you sent back:

Yup! See you then?

And he sent:

I’ll find another excuse to be there. 

Feeling a little bold, you replied:

Excited to see you again! You have these adorable dimples when you smile. Maybe I’ll see those, too?

When nothing came through for a few minutes, you feared you might have gone too far. It was just a little innocent flirting, right? Nothing bad? And then:

Maybe so. See you Monday.

Smiling, you didn’t send anything back. It’d be your luck to say something dumb and rub him the wrong way. 

During your first walk, as soon as the ice broke, you both clicked really well. Hopefully – just maybe – things would flow like that again. The connection you felt, something akin to a liveware, couldn’t have been one-sided. He had to feel a spark of it, too; even if just a little.

You drove home, made dinner while facetiming one of your friends from uni, and when she asked about the spark in your eye you told her about your friend Helaena’s younger brother.

III.

“I seriously cannot believe you’ve never seen The Lord of the Rings. The Hobbit trilogy was a little silly, but watchable. But you haven’t even seen that?” Aemond asked clearly aghast at your lack of understanding his reference.

Tonight, you both got walking duty again and neither of you complained. And, this time, he regarded you with a softer look in his eye than his original sharp glance. He was dressed in dark casuals again and you hated (loved?) how good he made them look. His hair was in a bun and his eyepatch stayed firmly in place. You wanted to ask him about it but weren’t sure if you should try it yet. Instead, you rolled your eyes and laughed. “You’re making it sound better and better the more you talk about it.”

“That’s because it’s the best.” The dogs pulled both of you along and you had to walk brisker than normal to keep up with them and Aemond’s longer legs. He seemed unaffected by it.

“So, you recommend I watch it?” You asked playfully.

“No,” he started, very serious. “I recommend you read it first and then watch the movies.”

If you had more breath in your lungs you’d have giggled – not laughed, but giggled. Something about the way he said it, and the totally serious look on his face, tickled you. “Will you watch them with me?”

The question appeared to catch Aemond off guard. He looked at you, lingering over your pinkened cheeks and smirking lips, before finally making it back to your eyes. Just when he opened his mouth to say something in reply, a completely unrelated thing stole his attention. Sometime during your bantering you’d made it back to the shelter, and a tall dark-haired woman called out, “there’s my sweet Aemond. I’ve been trying to get a hold of you and you haven’t been answering your phone.”

If you thought Aemond attractive, this woman made him look like any regular ol' Joe. She was elegant, warmed by a late summer tan, and had raven dark hair cascading down her back; truly a vision of enchantment. When she sauntered to him and pressed her body to his, you felt like a voyeur watching the embrace.

“Alys,” Aemond breathed quietly. “What do you want?”

“You know what I want,” she answered as she trailed manicured fingers across the front of his chest.

She had a timeless look to her, the kind that concealed her age. She could have been anywhere from twenty-five to fifty, you thought. You really hadn’t a clue. All you knew, now, is that you should finish your task alone.

Aemond’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. Posture tense. “I told you I was busy tonight–”

Before you could stop yourself you cut him off with an awkward wave. “See you later, Aemond.” And, with that, you walked inside before you overheard anything else they might be saying to each other. Turning to glance over your shoulder one last time, you were met with a look of deliberate triumph from Alys; she had the greenest eye you’d ever seen. 

It was haunting.

Driving home, you felt stupid. Aemond was just a guy you just met. It was silly to think someone like him would be single and even sillier to think your innocent flirtations would be working on him. You had half a mind to delete his number. Or, at the very least to delete the short message thread of your texts.

Instead of making dinner like you normally did, you called in delivery and facetimed with your friend as you waited. She immediately knew something was off and you were quick to tell her everything that happened.

Twenty minutes passed and you were starting to feel better. It’s not like you two hooked up or even kissed. It was just a chance meeting with playful banter. Nothing to get shook up about. “Food’s here. Thanks for listening to me. I’ll talk to you later. Love you!” You said as you got up to answer the door. 

When all else failed, your favorite food could always make you feel better.

Turning the tv on and sitting down amongst your couch pillows and blankets, you were getting ready to dig in when your phone rang. 

Aemond. 

Your insides did a weird flip and hunger disappeared entirely from your mind and belly. Should you answer? Let it go to voicemail? Turn the stupid thing off and completely ignore him? Right before the final ring, you decided. “Hello?”

“Hey,” he said, immediately sounding relieved. “I’m sorry about that. I wasn’t yet ready to call it a night with you.”

“It’s no biggie,” you replied. Lying. “I didn’t want to interrupt anything–,” you paused, searching for something else to say to soften the edge of your voice, “–the dogs were getting tired anyway.” God. It sounded stupid even to your own ears.

Aemond sighed through the phone. You wondered if he slid his hand down his face or through his hair. It sounded like he did. “No. Alys is… it’s complicated. She’s my ex and–”

“ –you don’t have to explain anything to me,” you said, cutting him off. “Really. It’s fine.” Despite it being a phone call, you tried to smile as if it would blunt the dismissal of your tone.

“I mean it,” he said. “I really wasn’t ready to say bye yet. What do you say you skip your regular Wednesday night plans and grab a milkshake or something with me?”

Your insides flipped again but for an entirely different reason this time. You knew it: the sparks definitely weren’t one sided. The firm set of Aemond’s jaw and the rigidness of his shoulders flashed once more in your mind’s eye. Since your break up with your long-term boyfriend you’d been on a few dates, but none of them lead to anything worthwhile. With how you and Aemond clicked, however? This date might lead to something more than a hook-up (or, attempt at a hook-up. Some men truly had no game). “Are you sure…?” You asked after a moment. “You and Alys looked pretty comfortable–,”

“ –I’m sure,” it was his turn to cut you off.

“Alright then. Let’s do it.”

IV.

It'd been two months since your first milkshake date with Aemond – the first of many dates. It was a guilty pleasure of yours and apparently one of his, too!

Your first kiss, first time meeting his elder dog, Vhagar, and first time meeting his family were all memories you cherished. 

The more you learned about Aemond’s relationship with Alys, the more you understood it "complicated". Including Targaryen drama, Targaryen business, and a list of other things you had a hard time following. It didn’t matter anymore, though, Aemond reassured you. Things were done between them and he only wanted you; proving it to you with fingers and mouth until you begged for a break.

A lesson you learned from your last relationship – one Aemond learned from his, too – was to be careful with love. As much as you genuinely enjoyed him and his company, a barrier stood between you that neither dared yet to cross.

Love.

Each day you fell for him a little more; you were scared to admit it. The scar of heartbreak healed slowly. Could you truly trust Aemond with that part of yourself? With the very essence of your heart? It’d been two months and you still weren’t entirely sure.

If he felt the same he’d say something, right?

Autumn blanketed the lands with brisk air, rainy days, and rolling fog. As days grew short and nights long, you and Aemond spent more time at your apartment or his quarter at the Targaryen estate. Your apartment was the clear favorite. Living alone had its perks: never having to worry about nosy family or friends who showed up unannounced.

And thank God you didn’t live with anyone else. 

"Mmh… fuck, baby, I've been thinking about this all day. I can't get enough of you. Let me make my girl feel good," he said against your mouth as one of his hands moved up the inside of your thigh. "Are you wet already? I bet you are," he chuckled, fingertips tracing your slit. "Mmm… I knew it. Your clit is sooo needy, isn't it?" 

Shit. Those hushed words, the glint in his eye, his rasped tone… you happily indulged him in whatever way he wanted. And him, you. Fingers, mouth, cock, he quickly learned what tricks made you melt. 

As much as he loved having you ride him, or bending you over, his absolute favorite was fucking you into the mattress. You sprawled out beneath him, hair messy and fanned out around your head, legs wrapped tight around his waist, fingernails on his body… he could never get enough of your blushed face beneath him, trembling and arching as he pushed you to peak after peak.

Your sheets had never been cleaned so often in your entire life.

It was particularly rainy today and you were both finished with everything on your to-do list. Aemond sat on the floor in front of you as you lounged in your overstuffed chair. You told him you'd read the Lord of the Rings as long as he read it to you. He didn't even pretend to be annoyed by your bargain. He read to you from his own collection, claiming he liked the worn feeling of the pages better than a new book's pages. 

Like any proper reader Aemond started with The Hobbit. You enjoyed it more than you thought you would. More so than the story, however, you enjoyed him reading aloud to you – he had the loveliest voice. You were about half way through The Fellowship of the Ring and the story continued to get better.

But, all afternoon, Aemond's phone never stopped going off. It seemed like every few minutes it would ping with some kind of notification. "Who's blowing you up?" You asked, annoyance creeping into your tone.

Stopping mid sentence, he looked. "Alys," he sighed as he scrolled through the various messages. 

You tried to not look over his shoulder to the texts. You really did. But there was something about Aemond's shift in posture, and the air around him, that made you suspicious. "What's going on?" You asked in your best nonchalant manner.

"She's asking if I have some of her clothes at my place still," he answered and you swore you saw pink spread atop his cheeks.

That caught you off guard. "Why would she have clothes–"

And whatever else you were going to say was abruptly cut off.

There, in a new string of messages, was the single text line, "I miss you, baby boy," followed by at least three photographs of Alys in lingerie and various stages of undress. 

"What the fuck Aemond!?" You asked, anger and hurt instantly warming your blood. "What the hell were those? Are you fucking joking?"

"I have no idea why she sent–"

" –is that why she left clothes at your place? Couldn't let her go for real? Jesus Christ I can't believe you." Anger flushed your face and bittered your words.

"Listen, please. Hear me out, bab–"

" –oh fuck off, Aemond, you don't get to 'babe' me around anymore. In fact, just leave."

He looked as hurt as you. And shocked. A hundred emotions played across his chiseled features. "No, really. Let me explain," he pleaded with eye and tone.

You weren't having it. You were cheated on before and he knew it. It made your own hurt cleave even deeper. You really fucking liked him. Maybe even loved him. And this whole time he had you and Alys? "I'm seriously about to get really fucking angry. Leave. Now."

He stood and left. Silent fury screamed around him like a whirlwind. He didn't even give you one final look over his shoulder.

He shut your door with a deliberate click.

You curled up in your blanket alone as fat ugly tears streamed down your face. You couldn't be bothered to grab a tissue for your snotty nose. 

Aemond's leather jacket was still draped over the back of your couch and his book still lay on the floor. Your crying somehow turned uglier at the realization.

Eventually you dozed off. With Aemond, you always had your phone on silent so you didn't hear all his missed calls and texts.

V.

The following month went by in a blur; you drowned yourself in work. You also stopped volunteering because you didn't want to give Aemond the opportunity to meet you there. By some feat of strength you ignored all his attempts at talking – and by proxy, apologizing.

The only thing you said to him was a single text:

I need time. Please understand

Part of you wondered how it affected him. His calls and texts became sparse until they eventually stopped.

Helaena asked where you'd been and you felt horrible lying to her. So, you didn't. After telling her the story she sighed and asked if you'd want to grab tea. You agreed. Meeting her at a local cafe allowed you to air out your feelings; laughs and tears alike. She was kind, and sweet, and supportive without being passive. She loved her brother but knew he had many of his own issues. You'd been friends for over a year and this was the first true heart to heart you shared.

Upon returning home you picked up the Fellowship and tried to read from where Aemond left off. But, it wasn’t the same without him and it only made you cry. Again.

VI.

The following morning, despite your car's newer model, it barely wanted to start for your drive to work. By a stroke of luck you made it there fine. And, made it back home that evening, too. But that was the end of your luck. It needed to be picked up and taken to a shop until a mechanic could see it.

Carless, you had to rely on Uber or public transportation. Yuck.

A few days of stress passed and now you were done for the week. Thank God for weekends. Unfortunately your groceries were extremely low and you would need to make a trip in the morning. You sighed and used it as an excuse to order pizza.

After waking up and a breakfast of (the last, and past its sell-by date) packet oatmeal you got around to make the walk to the nearest grocery store. Knowing you'd be walking home, too, the list was small. Carrying bags up two flights of stairs was hard enough, much less carrying them home a mile!

On the way back it started sprinkling. Great. Just great. You started walking faster with hopes of making quicker time than your leisurely stroll to the store. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, you heard your name called. Was that…? Stopping in your tracks you looked across your shoulder to the side of the road and saw none other than Aemond. You knew his car and voice anywhere. You didn't have to see yourself to know a dozen emotions played across your face.

"Hey," he said gently, his own features a mirror of yours.

"Hi," you said.

"Why are you walking in the rain with groceries?"

Slumping your unintentionally scrunched up shoulders, you sighed. "Stupid car died on me and it's been with the mechanic for almost a week."

He smiled softly. So soft. The outside of his seeing eye crinkled and emotion rushed to your chest. Your gut. "You're way too good to be walking alone. Let me drive you home at least?" 

You didn't resist. How could you? "Alright. Sure. Just dropping me off though, okay?" Guilt panged your chest. Did he feel it too? Could he read it on your face he knew so well?

"Alright," he answered, expression falling just slight. You might as well have stomped on his foot with how it affected you.

I miss you. I love you. I'm sorry. Can we try it again? Can I hold your hand? God I love your hair in a ponytail. You smell good. Did you see the trailer for that new horror movie? I miss you. I love you. I'm sorry. It all turned around your head like a fucking rotisserie chicken. It shouldn't be so hard to say any of those things to him. But it was.

You didn't say anything on the short ride home. Neither did he. His right hand flexed a few times and you wondered if he was having a hard time, too.

"Can you get it all upstairs?" He asked as he pulled into an empty spot and parked, looking across to you with horribly concealed emotion.

"Yes, but…," you trailed off momentarily, trying to read his face. "I still have your book and jacket. Wanna come up and grab them?" You asked hopefully.

He killed the engine faster than you could blink. "Yes! So that's where they've been. You could have mentioned it sooner," he said slightly accusingly, grinning at you with a spark of playfulness.

Leading the way upstairs to your apartment, you unlocked the door and disappeared inside. After placing your items down and grabbing Aemond's, you turned to look at him standing in the doorway. He leaned against it. Waiting. Quiet. He glanced around with a wistfulness that made your throat tight. You watched him watching you and your home until the air became awkward – was it half a second, a few seconds, longer? You weren't sure. 

Slowly you walked over to him. Your gaze flickered up at him as you handed his things back. "Were you ever going to tell me the truth?" You asked. "Did you think I really wouldn't find out? Why did you stick around if I wasn't good enough?"

He blinked. Taken back. "You never even gave me the chance to explain." His jaw feathered before it tightened. His eye hardened.

You grabbed the door, fixing to close it on him. Now that you started talking – unloading pent up questions which kept you tossing and turning at night – you couldn't decide if you wanted to slam it on his face or yell. "I told you how I was cheated on! And you did it anyway! I trusted you, Aemond." Your voice thinned, sounding shrill even to your own ears.

One of his hands braced on the door so you couldn't close it on him. "So this is your revenge then, huh? Punishing both of us? Why don't you trust me?" Hurt and fury simmered in the lovely hue of his eye. A storm. No, a hurricane. "Alys and I have been done for months. Months. Even before you and I met. I'm sorry for what she did but I can’t control what she does. She was playing her wicked games trying to sabotage us– you and me. Don't shut me out. Please." 

He pleaded, every pore and line of his face begging for forgiveness. As each word came off his tongue they clicked into place in your head. He meant it. He was telling the truth. Before you could stop yourself your fists balled into the front of his shirt, pulling him down so your mouth crashed up to his. "You mean it?" You asked through the kiss.

Instantly he leaned down into you, and instantly he held onto your waist pulling you deeper against him. His other hand cradled the side of your face daring to curve along the shape of your skull. "I mean it. Yes I fucking mean it," he answered against the kiss; breath stealing yours away until it left you in a little moan.

You pulled him inside and shut the door, locking it. You moaned as he nipped and bit at your neck. Your heart thumped wildly. He sucked at the sensitive skin, again and again, pulling away just before leaving a mark. "God, Aem,” you whimpered. Goosebumps covered your body. The only thing on your mind was him.

"Fuck, I missed you. I missed you so much." His hands were somehow all over you all at once. His mouth trailed, and dragged, and kissed over any exposed portion of your skin. He happily pulled off layers of your clothing to expose more and more of your soft, warm, saccharine flesh; intoxicating him. After weeks of your separation the last thing he wanted to do was to push too far too fast.  “Can I take this off?” He asked before taking your shirt off.

“Yes,” you replied breathily. “Fuck it. Take all of it off. I missed you too. So much,” you said as you helped pull his clothes off, too. He pushed you against a wall. You kissed. Heavier, and hotter, and hungrier. You pushed him against a wall. 

He gasped as he smirked. “I love when you act all tough when we both know I can have you squirming under me in minutes,” he growled, pupil swelling. The dimples at the very corners of his mouth betrayed his amusement, however, as he once again pushed you against the wall. You were both only in your underwear, now, and his lean body on yours had you aching. “My tough girl… how quickly do you think it’ll last when my fingers are in you?”

“Why don’t we find out?” You asked defiantly, knowing damn well it wouldn’t last long at all. By now you were both down the hallway and your bedroom was only a couple feet away. You needed him. Now. And judging by how fucking hard he was he needed you too.

The next moment went by in a blur and before you could catch yourself you were sprawled out on your back atop your bed. Aemond made quick work of moving you both inside, and made quicker work of pulling your panties down. He groaned as your thighs immediately spilled open for him. He dragged two fingers up your slit and circled your clit with your arousal. “Shit–,” he hissed. “Never make me wait so long to have this pussy again. Do you understand me? Never,” he said as he worked your already swollen clit. He played with it just how he knew you liked it and your cunt’s tiny wet sounds sent his cock throbbing. “Answer me.”

Tension built in the low muscles of your belly. Your legs began to tighten already – one of the tell-tale signs of your approaching climax. How the hell could he push you there so quickly? “N-never! Ahh-h never again!” You replied, voice light, and sweet, and tantalizing as any sin Aemond ever knew. “Please, Aemond, I want to cum…!”

He shoved those same two fingers into you. “Good girl,” he said as he curled those fingers. “This pussy is mine. All fucking mine. Give it to me,” he said huskily as he worked them in and out of you. It was sloppy and wet. Borderline obscene. Each time he slammed his hand against you he was mindful to press the heel of his palm against your clit and your mound, knowing how the extra pressure sent your pretty toes curling.

You cried out his name as your eyes clenched shut. The tension in your belly snapped and a wave of glorious bliss washed over you. Sweat sheened between your breasts and along your lip. You arched, quivered, shuddering in the aftermath of his intensity. 

Aemond’s mouth crashed to yours and you threaded your fingers through the roots of his hair. It was still in a ponytail and you had no mind to take it out, you just had to pull him deeper into the kiss. He tasted the salt of your sweat and groaned. “Relax your pussy, baby, you’re clenching me really hard. It feels amazing but I don’t wanna hurt you pulling out,” he said tenderly, nuzzling his nose into the crook of your neck.

“Sorry,” you giggled. “Just feels too good.” You tried to steady your breath and relax as he laid beside you, continuing to kiss your neck and shoulders. When your spongy walls finally eased around him you were sad to feel him withdraw. Stress melted away from your subconscious and you wanted to thank him for the pleasure. You wondered if your eyes said it while he looked at you.

Leaning up, he discarded the final piece of his clothing and sighed in relief as his cock sprang free. He got between your thighs and looked down at you hungerily. “Look at you all doe eyed already. See? I knew you couldn’t stay tough for long,” he said, smug, as he lined up with your drenched cunt. He held one of your legs up against him, and you pressed the other against his side. 

When you left for the store this morning you had no idea your afternoon would go in this direction.

He pushed into you. Inch by inch he sunk into you and soon he was as deep as he could be. A moan escaped both of you, and a throatier one left him when his free hand tugged at your bra. It was one that clipped in the front. He popped it open and rocked into you as soon as your tits spilled free. "You're so sexy like this."

With your body already sensitive from your first orgasm, and now with Aemond building a rhythm between your thighs, you weren't going to last long. "You feel so good," you purred, eyelids heavy. "Fuck I missed you."

Another sound left his chest and when you wrapped your legs around his slim waist you swore you felt goosebumps pebble all along his skin. Or, maybe those were your goosebumps on your legs. Whatever the case, Aemond leaned forward and kissed you again. "I missed you too," he rumbled. "Gonna let me fill this pretty pussy with my cum again?"

You two made good use of your birth control and you weren't about to deny him – or yourself – the pleasure of being thoroughly fucked and stuffed. "Y-yeah," you stammered, smiling.

Aemond mumbled something incoherent into your neck, and if your brain wasn't foggy from his perfect fucking cock you might have caught what he said. 

He leaned up and supported himself on his forearms, pressing his forehead to yours. "You're my girl. You're my fucking girl. You're my fucking girl," he repeated again and again until the pace of his thrusts grew sloppy. Somehow the sloppiness of it, the neediness and urgency of his voice, sent emotion swelling in all of you.

Heat collected and grew out from your spine, webbing throughout your entire body. You clung to him desperately. You rolled your hips up into him and shamelessly grinded your clit against his pelvis as he drove in and out of you. It was all too much. You crumbled beneath him and let orgasm take control of you. The depths of your body squeezed and convulsed around him, holding him tight and soaking the fullness of his length with your slick. He never stopped or paused his thrusts. 

His own peak followed. Once he was as deep as he could be he released everything he had into you. He stayed there, both of you panting through little moans, until he no longer twitched between your stretched walls. Slowly, he pulled out, and slowly, his seed dribbled out of you. Grinning, he rolled onto his back and scooped you against him.

"Let's stay here like this all day," you mumbled happily, fingertips trailing up and down his abdomen and chest.

"You'll get no argument from me," he said.

Quiet minutes passed and the sound of his heart nearly put you into a trance. "I'm sorry for how I acted," you finally admitted.

All the while he'd been petting and trailing his fingers through your hair. He didn't stop as he answered, "and I'm sorry for not trying harder." He kissed your forehead and held you tighter.

"Let's try it again. For real this time. With the titles and commitment and everything."

"Are you asking or telling me to be your boyfriend?"

You smirked. "I'm suggesting."

Returning your smirk, he pulled you atop him so you could straddle him. "You're all mine," he said with a dark eye. "My perfect girl." 

Leaning down, you kissed and nipped his bottom lip. "Are you already hard again, Aemond Targaryen?"

A chuckle rumbled somewhere in his chest as his touch dented into your hips to hold you at just the right angle. With a roll of his hips he pushed himself up inside you again. "Whose cock is this?"

You gasped, eyes darkening with another round of lust. "Mine."

"That's right. Yours. Not anyone else's. It's fucking yours."

You rode him until your tits were covered in fresh hickies and you were filled with another load of him.

Yours. His. The second chance you both needed.

-

Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed, please consider a follow, and/or reblog, and/or letting me know as it all makes me vvvery happy! ♥

To be added or removed from the taglist, hit me up!

Masterlist

Main taglist: @watercolorskyy @melsunshine @girlwith-thepearlearring @arcielee @barbiedragon @dreamsofoldvalyria @chompchompluke @fan-goddess

Aemond taglist: @darylandbethfanforever9 @bellaisasleep @aemondsblog @khaleesihel @sirenofavalon @sahvlren @doublesparrows @aemonds-fire @nikstrange @abbyandizzysmum @lost-and-founds @castellomargot @okfashionista @avidreader73 @snh96 @boofy1998 @evermorre

[askthefamous8]

Even if I haven't been very active lately, 9 years is still pretty significant- happy birthday to the blog!

So like Percy up there I'm gonna do so dome reflecting. This blog's where I've often done that for some reason, but here's the tl'dr for blog related stuff.

• I would like to keep drawing stuff but feeling generally unsure in myself, and I'm wondering if all the years of fandom harrassment have caught up with me • I have one big project in mind, I've been dipping my toe into what I'd need to do it. No spoilers but it was one of the first things I played around with this series, so do with that what you will • If I can keep myself drawing, I want to use more of the original source material since I'm struggling with original ideas. So stuff like redraws, hOpEfULlY even animatics, just like what originally got me so into trains yknow? Because that's fun and sparks joy. And that always goes down a treat with you guys so bonus • As always I appreciate you guys not coming after me for being so inconsistent

The rest of this is me doing what Percy's doing in the drawing and reflecting, as there is indeed much 2 think about. It's also a little sad and venty so, there's your warning there.

.

Ok so obviously a busy year, we moved into our new house that we actually own, I spent most of the year planning our wedding, and then got married. Big stuff. Also! I came off antidepressants in the summer. I've been on them for...basically as long as this blog, 6 months after I started it I think. Which also means I'd been on antidepressants my entire adult life. Feels like a big deal and I guess I'm still adjusting.

Another big thing, but sad, is that my dog died about two weeks ago. If you follow me on twitter you'll have seen her but she did make an appearance here a few Halloweens ago

I got her when she was 13 and had her 8 years after that. So that's been difficult. Unrelated to that (probably), but I just feel...really mediocre. And before you point out the obvious, this has been present even before I came off antidepressants. But yeah just... mediocrity. In myself as a person, how I look, what I draw, my whole life really (barring my marriage thankfully). What have I achieved? I'm 26, I'm not working, I don't feel well, my art isn't good (I don't think so anyway- like yeah it's technically fine I guess but it's not, and has never been, very stand-out or impressive). And lately art doesn't bring me the same joy it once did, and I'm wondering if all the years of harrassment from this fandom (mostly the twitter side, tumblr's been pretty good to me) has finally caught up with me and put me off the whole thing. Or worse, that I just don't have as much of an interest in it anymore. I don't think I'll ever be like "ok yep I'm officially done with this blog" because I'm so stubborn but idk. I want to make things and be creative, I want to make more train art, but it doesn't feel the same. I don't know what's wrong. What do you listen to? What you want vs what you feel? I still enjoy train stuff, I love going to Awdry Ex every year. It's been like this for awhile. It's not even like I have a strong feeling of what I'd rather be doing as far as careers go. And even if I did, oh yeah I'm sure my two degrees in animation will be very relevant in another field (sarcasm). I feel adrift. My sails are open but there is just no wind. Planning my wedding gave me something to do and work on and just, feel useful but now that that's over I feel lost again. Losing my dog, who had become the center of my life because of how vulnerable she had become, hasn't helped.

On the more creative side of things, I also don't really know what to do with this blog's story either. The show's ended as far as most people are concerned, and I kiiinda wrote myself into a corner because once Thomas turns 18 he's going to leave for university, and that sets off this whole arc with James but basically the problem is it involves characters leaving and for some reason that feels like a no-no here. Don't get me started on the timeline lol. But Thomas works on a railway on Sodor, that's how it has to be...right? I guess I'm sort of at a crossroads of, ok do I want this to be close to the source material, and thus easily digestible to newcombers? Or do I want to make it more and more my thing and distanced from the source material? I doubt there's many new people coming since the series ended. And even then, there's a lot more humanization artists around now than when I started, so it's not like I'm filling a niche anymore. Just to be clear it's fine and also good that there's more humanization artists, variety is good, I just don't feel as "needed" anymore (which is 100% in my head and not an actual role that belongs to me or something). I started this blog when I was 17, so my interests and what I relate to have changed obviously. The character designs certainly have. It's never followed a super rigid story plan, but the core of it has always been the central cast doing things on Sodor. I however have always had a scene/project/animatic/whatEver in mind for when this 'series' would '''officially''' ''''end''''. But then what comes after that? I've always tried to run this blog like they are Real People that You interact with. But in real life there is no ending to the story, there's always more stuff to come. You get married, and it's wonderful, and then life goes on. The credits never roll. So maybe that's what I'm having trouble coping with...the progression of time. Ah, my old nemesis. I've always had trouble with letting go of things. There's nothing to say that I couldn't still draw stuff after the series "ends". I guess any story after Thomas leaves could be like... a sequel series or a spin off or something. Spin-off of a spin-off. Famous 8 All Grown Up. Famous 8 Qurter Life Crisis. Who knows. I certainly don't.

I've also been really into an original project unrelated to this but those don't get as much attention and while I'd like to do something with it one day, I don't feel very confident in being able to make that happen right now. But you know... as far my as art not being super spectacular goes... I think my individual talent has always been is my ideas, like the writing side of things. And then brought to life with my art, which normally isn't anything to write home about but is good enough to convey the idea and be not-awful to look at, lifts both of them beyond what they were individually. Maybe that's what I should focus on. Maybe that's wishful thinking.

So....idk. Idk what I'm doing but I'm trying to be gentle on myself and just let myself continue to drift, to heal from this heavy loss, and then in the New Year I'll try and pick myself up. Then there will be no more big once-in-a-lifetime events coming up, no more just-moved-into-a-house-and-oh-no-there's-a-bunch-of-things-that-need-attention-NOW scenarios, and no more big holidays for awhile. I guess we'll see.

If you read all of this I am so sorry but also thank you for reading my ramblings. And thank you for being around, whether that's been for a few months or for several years, but especially if it's been several years

[justhauntley]

So I've got this httyd au idea that I've been sitting on for awhile now, I guess it could be considered as a rewrite or something but I don't see it that way. Anyway here's some ideas for my Colourful Nights AU, I'm still working out the factors so it's not the best.

There's going to be more of my thoughts under the cut (aka the usual Hauntley rambling)

First and foremost, the idea to give Grimmel a night fury comes from this post on reddit

Before seeing this I had 100% planned to just... Not have Grimmel exist in the Colourful Nights au? I kind of hate his whole- thing?

I had the idea of Grimmel seeing what Drago did and deciding that where the man failed was not in trying to control dragons, but instead that he didn't try to control powerful dragons specifically. I know that Toothless is supposed to be an endling, but I think the idea of Grimmel slowly building his own dragon army but with dragons he considers powerful and having a few night furies is cool so. Maybe he kept a couple of night furies back during the mass fury hunts, because having them bend to his will makes him feel powerful? Or maybe he only had one. I'm not sure if I'll even keep it but I like the idea.

For my light fury design (I call her Clearscales), I liked the idea of her being a night fury with some sort of genetic mutation, and I'm not sure if I want to keep the disappearing act or not? I like it but I don't know if it would still work if I gave her darker scales, but also! Would I be able to call her Clearscales still? :( That's a very important part, because I've gotten attached to the name.

I also had an idea that relates back to a fact about the Dramillion titan in rtte, it has the ability to camouflage itself like a changewing because they're distantly related, implying that titans have access to traits the normal members of their species don't have.

So what if Toothless' lightning isn't an inherent night fury skill, but instead a trait of night fury titans? Maybe it's due to a possible distant relation with skrills? I always liked the idea that the "lightning" part of "Offspring of lightning and death" was because their blasts look somewhat like a the result of a lightning strike (at least in the 1st movie), but maybe it's also because a titan was witnessed doing this, and because the second and third movies imply that after the first transformation, the titans don't look any different from the normal members, people just assumed that it was something they could all do, and ontop of everything else, it led to a mass panic and hunt?

I'm all over the place and am in no way coherent, but that's my dumb little idea, if you're reading this I can't believe you actually read what I wrote, or scrolled down through it at least. Thank you :)

[bleue-flora]

yeah I think even though c!Tommy had a lot of visitors in exile, its all undermined because he still felt lonely and c!Dream had told him that people were only visiting him to see the place and encouraged c!Tommy to see the gifts as pity gifts but its a nice comparison you made regardless I think comparing the physical torment both faced it would be interesting, c!tommys was more spaced out and emotional based + the hits he took from cdreams weapons, c!dreams was daily and more extreme

[context]

{wrote this answer awhile ago, and was going to add to it a comparison of Exile and prison emotional and physical abuse data but due to recent events I’m finding it hard to watch exile streams so that analysis has been put on hold, but figured I could still post this answer.}

Look I'm not saying Dream isn't a good manipulator, because he certainly is, but from Day 1 even before Dream shows up to visit, Tommy is already moping and calling people's gifts pity gifts and stuff (like in that post the clip of Bad happens before Dream shows up for the first time). In fact, the more I rewatch Exile the more I wonder what would have happened if it had been someone else in Tommy's shoes? Would the situation seem as screwed up if the person was more resistant to the abuse and not falling apart on their own. Is that why there are people who see Dream as deserving of prison, and Exile as more emotionally damaging? I don't know, it's just a thought, is it Dream’s nonchalance that cuts into people's pity and empathy?...

It's actually something I've thought about a lot in the last year, because there is almost always something going wrong in my life and so I've kinda adapted this "is what it is" "this is fine" "I tried what more can I do" attitude of letting things roll off and just dealing with it and turning it into a funny story (sometimes you gotta laugh to keep from crying). It was actually highlighted a few weeks ago when my coworker was trying to stress to me how awful and cold it would be if my heat were to go out this winter. And I was like - "I am beyond aware, I lost my heat, hot water, and internet during a snow storm last year so I know exactly how miserable it is." and her face was just like 'oh... right' as if my anxiety and the words I'd been saying all week finally dawned on her. As if the lighthearted nature and attitude in which I shared those facts before undid the gravity of them.

It’s actually something I really noticed this summer when my sister-in-law was in a car accident and got a concussion. My parents were reasonably worried and like offering to come up and if they need to bring my brother and her food and stuff, and it caught me by surprise in a weird way. Not because I don't think she (and my brother) didn't deserve or need the help and sympathy, but because less than a year and a half ago, after spending a week with covid in an apartment with broken air conditioning during heat advisory, I end up fainting while coming out of the shower as I was getting ready to finally go back to work... The crazy person I am, I was bleeding and still the thought in my mind was - 'I'll just stick a bandaid on it’ (I ended up with 7 stitches lol)... Anyways, long story short despite my concussion I pushed on through my second to last semester of engineering courses and hell even made Dean's List despite my struggling short memory, which might be one of my proudest achievements to be honest. And in hindsight as I observed people's care and concern for my sister-in-law and them asking if she needs to leave the room for the quiet and how long is she taking off work... etc, I realized just how kinda screwed up it was that I had to handle everything by myself. That no one was there to tell me to not use a screen right after getting a concussion and how I definitely should not have been tutoring or doing school the week after. I did it all by myself and pushed through, and I realized that I think because I didn't make it a big deal, it became not a big deal for them. Because I laughed about it and tell the story in a comical way, people don’t seem to understand just how hard it was. As if a concussion in itself isn’t terrible, period.

In the same way, Torture is terrible, period. Dream shouldn’t have to be pathetic for that fact to be true. He shouldn’t have to be broken, or say “yes sir,” we shouldn’t need any evidence but that fact alone. (Now obviously within the dsmp Minecraft medium it’s a little different but hopefully you get the point). The torture isn’t any less horrible if the character reacts by becoming submissive or fighting back. Torture isn’t any less horrible because of who it is on (something Dream tries to highlight to Sam in Daedalus). Torture is bad. It doesn’t matter if the reason was good or not, it doesn’t matter if the victim shows how hurt they are or not. And yet, those facts change our perception of it. It is different to know someone was tortured than it is to see them having a panic attack afterwards or their scars.

So then, would characters and we the audience still think Exile is as bad as it was if the person who was exiled didn’t react the same. If their clothes weren’t falling apart. If they weren’t moping around and complaining. If the facts were the exact same, but the attitude of the character was different, how would it change how we saw Exile? Would we still see Exile as even comparable on any scale to Prison? If we saw all 82 of Quackity’s visits how would it change our perception? If Dream was too scared to hold an axe during jailbreak or if he cried in Punz’s arms right after, if he didn’t show such apathy when telling Sapnap or Foolish or Tommy about the torture, would it change how those characters felt about it? If Dream’s skin had clothes that we saw slowly deteriorating everytime we saw him in prison how would that change how we saw it? Or if Tommy’s clothes hadn’t changed, how would that change how we saw Exile?… yes Exile was horrible, and yes it was abuse and screwed up. But also, is part of why we see it as this big horrible thing because of Tommy’s reaction to it. That’s not to say it wasn’t horrible or I’m trying to minimize the abuse, but also lots of horrible things happen on the dsmp. I mean Fundy committed suicide and I don’t see people getting as upset at Wilbur as they do Dream for Tommy’s almost suicide.

I don’t know, it’s just something I’ve been thinking about. If Dream’s attitude to being tortured changed how characters and we saw it, and if in the same way, Tommy’s attitude changed how we saw Exile. If the roles were reversed or someone else was in Tommy’s place, (whether or not they are actually comparable), would anyone think they are even comparable in any aspect?

Sapnap: “What do you mean he was torturing you? Like literally torturing you?”

[brights-place]

do you mind doing a Branch x rock troll reader?

Branch dating an Rock troll! S/O

Pairings: Branch X Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: Sorry for the late post I've been kind of busy hon! anyways take the request! <33

- He met you when poppy introduced you to him since you were going to be helping him expand the structures of pop village - Branch would be confused at first when he realize he likes you - You slowly started to bond after awhile of hanging out and him learning about your genre as he told you about his back. - It's known pop Troll is extremely happy, strives happiness and seeks fun above all things which is so like them but its also true that they are prone to absolute panic when things go wrong, often overreacting in a comical way - But branch didn't have that atrribute well he had the panicking bit but the happy and fun part? that was... uhmmmm yeah no - Branch takes awhile to open up to you especially after well The Rock world tour - I mean come on! Barb was leading an world tour and all the crimes she has committed has changed his whole view of rock trolls though he is trying to welcome them slowly - This Dude Is Autism Coded you can’t change my mind! (I’m autistic) - Attempted world domination, Attempted cultural genocide, Hate crimes, Terrorism, Piracy, Malefic, War crimes, Crimes against trollkind, Mass invasion, Mass kidnapping, Serial grand larceny, Mass brainwashing, Unlawful imprisonment, Abuse of power, Conspiracy, Psychological abuse, Extortion, Minor arson, Assault and battery, Mass property destruction, Attempted mass slavery, Corruption, and Public endangerment! He has an whole list of crimes that were committed by barb

- Though after awhile of hanging around you he couldn’t help but feel relaxed and allowed you to touch stuff in his bunker

- He Let you meet Gary and you are the only one allowed to hold Gary and know everything about him. (Gary from trollstopia if you know)

- Branch enjoys how you listen to him when he rants about things

- You were so worried when he said he would drink his own sweat which you told him not too and is unhygienic

- After awhile he would notice subtle things about you and would learn more about you and your hobbies which poppy pointed out was kind of weird for branch since he never does that for other trolls a lot but him doing that for you? Poppy smirked - He fell for an ROCK TROLL! - This man was so confused and questioning himself as you were standing in front of him telling him about your new song that you wrote and were gonna preform with Petra, Romper and Rose - He was an pop troll... you were an rock troll you were different!

- Branch would listen to you about speaking about your genre and you listen about pop genre aswell - You two would do duet songs of rock songs and pop songs but if you could convince him to sing rock songs with you he would try... It turns out he’s good at it

- You teach him some Rock n Roll greetings and handshakes which he got used to

- He did the handshake infront of poppy doing the rock n roll greeting handshake with Riff and Barb who laughed and they told him where you were which made branch flustered

- Poppy stared at him with sparkling eyes squealing questioning if you two were dating which you weren’t… Yet!

- If Branch ever found something that would suite you for example some studded belts or leather braclets he would think of you and would buy it

- Whenever you meet up he would always have an gift that reminded him of you

- His love language is Acts of Service, Quality time and sometimes Gift giving

- Though he wouldn’t mind some affection from you since whenever you see him you hug him tightly

- Introvert X Extrovert type of bond!

- You are his opposite and that’s what he loves about you

- Your smile your laugh and yes you may be different genres but he loves you so much because of it.

- Your comfortable in your own shell and you help him to become comfortable with himself aswell!

- branch is thankful for you though you mainly come to his bunker then he comes to volcano rock city since he finds it hard to breathe due to well the lava and Asch along with the foggy presence

- Though he will visit if you can’t come if your sick or your doing an show

- He stared up at you when you were on stage signing while playing your guitar while maintaining eye contact with him

- After the show was done you rushed to him hugging him squealing excitedly glad he came to see your show

- He couldn’t help but stare at you with an spake in his eyes which you returned before leaning in kissing eachother with an smile on both your lips

- Barb coughed into your hand as you giggled while branch hid his face in your shoulder grumbling

- “Love you” Branch muttered as you smiled back “I love you too”

reblogs + comments are appreciated ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

©brights-place 2023 — do not repost on another platform, copy, translate or edit my works! if you fit my DNI list please don't interact!

[hellothisisangle]

I've rediscovered your work after awhile and was wondering if you'd ever return to TDIAHM

Yes! Eventually…

Tacking on this ask to get into more detail:

I wanted to rewrite it for a long long time, like even while I was still actively working on it.

If anyone remembers, the first TDIAHM stuff I posted was very loose, doodles, just situational (mostly) comedy comics on canvas. The “story” was the characters interacting with each other, and maybe there was a little bit of crime idk so many years ago right?

And to my surprise people liked it! I got contacted by Webtoons and they wanted a legit comic, fulltime. I said I could do it. I tried to work out the details, wrote as much in advance as possible, but things caught up to me. Not just the timeline of the comic, life in general.

I went on a couple hiatuses, survived a fire that burnt our neighbor’s house down, moved around, attempted to continue the comic best I could, scrounged for ideas that wouldn’t take too much time so I could actually live my life, it was affecting my relationship with my partner cause it’d take me like 80+ hours a week to finish, it was all so janky, I did it alone with a stressed brain and my tools/art are not streamlined for this work, then we lost some family members.

It was just all too much.

People grow and change. And looking back, I can’t be proud of the corners I cut and what I delivered. But the thing is I still love the idea. The characters and the world. I know I can do better and I will. On my own time. Which in a perfect world is how the creative process should go.

I’m actually done with the writing. Legit ending and everything. There wasn’t one before, so that’s something! What’s to come now are the parts that make any series consistently an easier load- a collection of assets like sheets for characters, objects, backgrounds. It’s gonna take me a bit, but we’ll get there 💪

Thanks all for bearing with me!

[stickyspeckledlight]

HAPPY ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO THIS BLOG (and oooo follower appreciation event too and giveaway/raffle; below in the read me bc I'm gonna force y'all to deal with my sappy sappy words first <3)

(don't bully me my art is shit)

Like. Wow. I can't believe this blog is ALREADY ONE YEAR OLD (well, 1 year and one day old, tho technically it's even older since it's just a reblog ACC converted into my writing blog---but I'VE ONLY BEEN WRITING FOR IT FOR A YEAR AND ONE DAY, SO THERE), and how many ppl have gathered here

But seriously, I can't believe how many people actually enjoy my fun lil drabbles (wdym 30k is a drabble---) like fr ppl tysm for enjoying the shit i cook like *blushes* I'm so happy we can all be fucked up freaks together UwU. others may look at us an think we're pineapple pizza, but they're ignorant. in reality they are the pineapple pizza. and yes anon who keeps sending me pineapple pizzas to my house (fabricated) i will come for you, I'm just very busy baking pineapple pizzas to stuff you with when your time comes. the grim reaper thinks it's a bit excessive, but i don't, so that means i am a perfectly reasonable and sane person.

I'd been wanting to write yandere fic for awhile, but never really did anything until last year on the good ol' march 23rd when aventurine made me simp so hard that i finally wrote yan fics. and since then tbh its a bit silly to say but life kinda feels a lot better knowing that I've a community to share these lil drabbles (stop calling them drabbles oml) with, yknow. its the small things <3

seriously, im so awed at how many cool ppl I've met since starting this blog. from the anon who sent me pineapple pizza, the anon who sent me banger comments abt destroyed onset, the anons who give me cardiac arrest, the anon who asked me how my corpse was doing, and literally every single anon who plays along with my bullshit (anon who sent sunday outfit ask I promise I'm getting to answer it but ngl everytime i try to i just end up cuddling into my own blankets thinking about how cozy sunday's outfit is---look if i read abt cozy things then i gravitate towards cozy things ok)---tysm for giving me a giggle! all of your comments and the things you send into my inbox are the absolute highlights of my day.

So, to show my appreciation, instead of working on Destroyed Onset 4 and 5, i will instead be doing.

COMMISSION RAFFLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (3/24/25 - 3/28/25)

it's quite simple. just follow my blog (new followers are welcomed ofc) and reblog this post, preferably with something stupid so i can laugh at it and maybe make a meme out of it. in fact you know what if you do then I'll double draw you into the raffle. see. I've given y'all an incentive now. REBLOG WITH STUPID SHIT IF YOU WANT TO BE ENTERED TWICE INTO THE RAFFLE. IS THIS FAIR? IS THIS JUST? IDK BUT IT SEEMS FUNNY SO IMA DO IT LMAO. what are you going to do, stop me? ha, puny mortal. there is no stopping me now. because I'm having a good time, having a good ti---

once you're entered into the raffle, i'll draw some names and reward the following:

ONE person gets a full-length fic (somewhere between ~2-5k words)

ONE person get a shortfic (so up to ~1-2k words)

TWO people get a drabble (~200 - 500 words)

(but tbh knowing me all of these might end up way longer then i intend them to be---we'll see lmao)

This will run from TODAY, March 24th, to FRIDAY March 28th. One Friday passes, the names will be locked in and I'll DM the winners to discuss commission details.

As for requesting/commission rules, they're on my main page under 'Other Stuff' (alongside the tag guide). But since these are commissions, I'll add that I'm perfectly willing to write OC or Self-Inserts. I will not write non-yan fics though, just because tbh I have a really hard time writing pure fluff; like, it's not that i can't write fluff, but after a bit it's hard to resist the urge to insert something that's at least A LITTLE dark or angsty, lmao. But also just cuz this is a yandere blog, I'd like to keep my writing focused on yandere

Note: Commissions will be private, unless the commissioner gives me permission to post

With that, thank you!

Oh, and for the people who end up getting the above prizes, I might give y'all some participation memes. Just like. Compensary. You don't get fic but you get a lame semi-mass produced speckled meme

[liveontelevision]

Hello friends,

Sorry about the lack of content recently, I've been running kinda low on energy :,) but I have some little treats, never fear.

Here's a short Vox thing I wrote awhile ago, it's angsty it's kissy, it ends with a cliffhanger. Classic fic by me.

I meant to turn it into a full thing, and I just might later? We'll see

CW: Smoking and smooching

Human | Vox x Reader

You cringe, scrunching up your nose when the familiar scent hits you. You approach the TV-headed demon, who was lounging on the large balcony of the Vees' Penthouse. Or was it lamenting?

"Yuck. You still smoke here?"

"It's Hell, doll. It's not like it'll kill me. Can't even feel the high anymore, actually."

"I guess not.. Then why do you even smoke? If it doesn't affect you?"

"Eh. I don't know. Try not to think too hard into that shit." A comfortable silence falls between the two of you.

"Can I bum one?" With a mocking scoff, he reaches into his pocket to pull out the pack. In a thoughtless decision, you place the cigarette between your teeth, pulling his face in your direction and inching impossibly close to him. He seemed startled by your sudden attack.

You hover just in front of his lips, lighting the end of your cigarette with the cherry of his own.

That was definitely an interesting move for someone with absolutely no history of smoking. As you inhale, you choke up and immediately cough out the rest. Vox is only watching you, a smile tugging at his lips while you cough up a lung. Your eyes water and you let out a whimper before propping your arms against the railing.

"Smooth." He comments.

"W-Watch it." You snap back.

You do manage to draw out a smoother hit, looking down at the city that, ironically, seemed so lively.

All that time went to waste. All those years you'd spent chasing over this CEO, being a part of the paparazzi, stalking the media for any buzz, passing his building when you have the time.. had the time. The fact that he's seemingly replicated his dream headquarters in the center of the underworld seemed like a Hell in itself. Constantly mocking you for never getting your big scoop. For wasting your life on him.

You couldn't help but approach it at first. You reluctantly enter the stores and offices that surround the first floor, inspecting all his products. You didn't recognize him at first. I mean, he has a TV screen for a head. His voice is what gave it away. His charismatic facade and sauve persona he uses on any television program. That's what you recognized. Apparently those are skills that stick with you after death.

He found you eventually. You'd been residing on the barren side of Hell. It was cozy. Not everyone had family members with them, you were just the lucky few. Your sweet grandma was here. Sinners who are visibly older seemed to be avoid by most clear-minded demons. Why bug them? And what kind of decisions did they make to end up here and survive for so long? They probably don't even remember why they're here. But some seemed to remember their lives.

Your grandma recognize you almost immediately. She was quick to take you into a part of hell that seemed to bypass the cities and dangers. It, of course, had its flaws. The Hellborn rodents were bothersome, but it somehow managed to be peaceful on its own.

It didn't last long, though. Extermination Day finally caught up to your little home. You have no idea how you survived, it was a miracle. but you were the only one. You started appreciating your aftlife in another fit of irony. You're nearly immortal, maybe it's time to give the city a try.

"Thanks for taking me in, too. You didn't have to do that."

"I can't leave my favorite stalker on the streets." He nudges you, having to lean down a bit to do so. He was towering. You let out the softest chuckle, leaning into his touch, despite it's teasing motivations. You sigh, taking another drag.

"Wait these aren't Valentino's smokes, are they?" You hold it over the edge, ready to flick it from your fingers, if that's the case.

"Definitely not. I wouldn't give you those if you asked." You hum at his words, releasing a puff of smoke. "But, uh.. let me know if he offers you any, alright?" You let out a little laugh and nod.

Your comfortable silence was broken, with the end of your cigarette. You let it crumble to the ground, stomping it with your nice business shoes. Vox rolls his eyes, shooing you away.

"Don't ruin those, they were expensive." He mutters.

"Well I would've been fine if you didnt essentially set my wardrobe on fire." You scoff.

"Your wardrobe? Was a bunch of country bumpkin dresses with poofy sleeves, doll. Even Vel was ready to get rid of that mess." The silence overcomes again. The breeze coming from the sheer height of the building seemed refreshing. You looked up to Heaven. How cruel of them to put it in sight.

"I really thought that was it. That life was short and then you die. That there was no point in trying to get rich and famous as long you were doing something you liked."

"So you liked stalking me?"

"Fuck off, Vox, you know what I mean." You couldn't help but smile. "How could I have wasted all that time on you? I could've been building my skills. Maybe I wouldn't be mooching off of some big shot like you if I did." You looked away, not willing to make any eye contact while mentioning him.

"Hey, you know I don't mind.. you can't prepare for death." He reaches out, he's not sure why, maybe to offer you some comfort. Maybe he just wanted to see your face, again. You darted away from him unknowingly, making his hand recoil.

"But, I mind! I don't want to rely on you. I should be able to do this by myself, I came here the same way you did, I had the same chance to get to where you are now." You huffed, embarrassment from your confession turning your face red. "But I just.. I didn't. I keep wasting my time..."

A cool touch hit your cheek, and before you know it your head had been turned to face Vox. He kept his claws holding your chin upwards, despite your attempts to pull out of his grasp.

"Stop it. There's nothing but time here. Listen, I know this isn't exactly what you had in mind, but- for the first time in years.. I feel... human, again." You blink slowly at him, not exactly minding his touch at this point. "And that's because of you." You hated getting flustered, but his words alone caused you to tense up. He felt your jaw clenching in his hand, bringing him back to reality. With a quick release, he brings his fist to his mouth and clears his throat.

"So.. yeah. Don't get it in your head that this is some sort of.. sugar daddy thing. You're free to do whatever you want. You can do whatever you want. And- you uh.. you're always welcome back." You stare at him for longer than you'd like to admit. Looking for some kind of excuse for your gaze, you hold your hand out for another cigarette. He gets the memo after awhile.

You place it between your lips and before you get the chance to think, his hands are back on your chin, bringing your face close. He mirrors your actions from before. It startled you, the cigarette falling from your lips and rolling off the balcony floor. Both your eyes follow it for a moment, before looking at eachother and sharing a little laugh.

His own cigarette falls from his lips. And with his hand still on chin you're pulled into an expected kiss. The sight of his dazed eyes when he finally pulls away only leaves you wanting more. But.. you can't. You pull away with a sullen look and step away from balcony. Without a word, you leave him alone. He's lost yet another independent spark. His heart can ache later. For now, he's cursing himself for letting anyone see that side of him, again.

♡♡♡

Womp womp

Love the pics where they knew eachother in life 👌

Taglist:

( @vififofum / @thornwolfy235 / @tinywolfiegirl / @chipper-chip / @bat-boness / @misfitgirlwrites / @nayomi247 / @lonelynmisunderstood / @escapistoftherealworld / @b4ts1e / @hamthepan / @kyo-kyo1 / @looking1016 / @polytheatrix / @littledolly2345 / @lillianastuff / @yourlocalcryptidbee /@0strawberrysorbet0 / @themageofblood / @jayyyayaysblog / @floralsightings / @azmosposts / @8har0ley8 / @actuallyspiderwoman / @sirenetheblogger / @christineblood / @kaytemchugh / @cimadreamer / @simpdevil66 / @azmosposts / @m3ow1 / @acrazyartist / @redfoxwritesstuff / @4k1to / @meesachan / @corvusskid / @alientee /@xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx / @alon3lylov3r /@sapphireravensworld / @mjmdragons / @catticora / @the-maladaptivedaydreamer / @carrie0-1 / @shamblezzz / @cassandras-nest )

[according2thelore]

I've had this little idea in my head for awhile but that last ask about Ls!Sam and Es! Dean really made me want to revisit it and share.

So i had this dumb little thought awhile ago.

It starts with es!Dean trying to kiss ls!Sam for whatever reason, and Sam pushes him away because he and ls!Dean promised, no stealing any firsts away from their younger selves.

And so younger Dean is pushed away, and he looks devastated, but more then that he looks scared. Panicked. Like he thinks he just made the biggest mistake of his life, letting Sam(any version of sam) know his fucked up feelings.

And Sam, already knowing what's going through deans head, is quick to be like "I want to kiss you! I do!" And younger Dean just eyes him, like he thinks he's lying. So Sam keeps explaining. "I want to, but you can't. If I- er, if younger me found out that I stole our first kiss, something I've been pining for since I was a kid? It would destroy, uh..." Sam winces, trying to work around how to word it, "...Me." He shakes his head. "What I'm saying is that your Sam needs that kiss first.

Dean doesn't look entirely convinced, but he's calmer now, not so panicked anymore. Though he still looks like he's ready to bolt if he needs to.

Sam sighs and keeps going, "Look. I feel the same way ok? I've felt this way about you for ages. But your firsts should be with him, not me. Not yet." He shakes his head, "I know it seems easier with me because I'm more developed-" He doesn't miss the obvious way Dean's eyes flick to Sam's chest. He bites down a scoff, typical Dean, "But I promise, he'll be thrilled to hear you tell him you love him. He wants to kiss you, needs it really. So-" another sigh, then a laugh. "Kiss him first. Then come talk to me when you've got it all figured out."

ANYWAY this isn't really anything. I don't remember exactly what inspired this but I know that this whole thing came from seeing people talk about Sam's tits, and I started think that the term "developed" tends to reference women's bodies as they get older. And I just thought that Dean automatically looking at Sam's chest when he says "developed" would be hilarious. That's really the only reason I wrote this whole thing LMAO

Idk if this would even fit anywhere in your es/ls verse, and I dont expect you to do anything with it lol, but I just thought the idea was funny and you might appreciate it. I assume we're all Sam titty enjoyers in this house, including and especially Dean Winchester LMAO

(Excuse any errors, I wrote this up in like 5 minutes without double checking much lol)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

omg i LOVE this--consider it canon!!!!!! :) or "canon," ig, since we're all just kinda messing around!

this has EVERYTHING i love!!!! AHHH!

tiny (steamy) addition, bc the "not yet" and "come to me when you've got it all figured out" got me thinking!

hope you enjoy and THANK YOU for sending it in!!!!!!! your brain, your genius...and for five minutes?? DAMN!!! thanks again! :) <3

-lizzy

"hey. sammy." sam looks up, and sees younger dean striding towards him. sam puts a paper in the book he's reading to hold his place, alarmed.

before sam can ask what's wrong, dean has rounded the library table, and stands in front of his chair. sam tilts his chair out, hands coming up to check for injuries, but--

hands in his hair. sam is tugged forward, up, and--

dean's lips are on his. dean...devours him. dean kisses him like a starving man, tongue on his bottom lip begging entry. sam opens--dazed, unable to deny dean in anything, any version of dean, so used to opening for his own dean when he's half fucked and delirious that he doesn't even think about it.

dean whimpers, tilting forward, sliding between sam's open thighs. dean's tongue is wet, hot, and slides against sam's own with heady determination. sparks skitter across sam's scalp as dean pulls sam further up, closer.

he makes a wounded noise when sam's hands come up to his hips, one of his hands wrapping around dean's waist like it's nothing, covering his entire flank. sam starts to kiss back--barely, tongue at dean's bottom lip--when he comes back to himself.

he uses his grip on dean's hips to haul him away, dean fighting him every step of the way and leaving wet, sucking kisses on sam's mouth as he pulls away.

"what--" he starts, dazed. dean's heaving for breath, mouth pink and bright and eyes glazed over like sam's been sucking his cock, not light kissing.

"we talked yesterday. worked it out. kissed him first." dean pants, and leans back in. the words register. he talked to sam. he kissed his younger self. hope and pride start to bloom in sam's chest, and he knows he's starting to smile from the way dean's eyes go soft and adoring. his thumb lands on sam's bottom lip, eyes going dark from how wet it is. "not stealing anything." he swears.

dean swoops back down, and sam has no time to stop him, dean kissing him with reckless, passionate abandon. he doesn't know what sam likes yet, he realizes, so he's throwing everything at the wall. it's endearing. and messy.

sam pulls back, trying to stay on track.

"i should--ah!" sam starts, but dean nips at his jaw, making sam jolt in his arms. "let me talk to dean, first, okay?"

he needs to talk to dean first. he's not stealing a first kiss, or a first makeout, or anything, but sam is not going to risk his relationship with his brother over this.

dean is not listening, and tries to come back to sam's mouth. sam starts to stand, taking control of the kiss, tongue licking into dean's mouth in a way that has dean legitimately humping forward into sam's thigh. by the time sam is standing, his head is bent low over dean, whom has stretched up and cradles sam's jaw between his hands.

sam lets his mouth go, and dean's lips are practically red, swollen a little with the force of sam's kiss.

"shit--sammy." dean pants, loosely rolling his neck to the side and pressing his chest up into sam like he's a swooning maiden on the cover of a bodice ripper.

sam acquiesces, pressing his lips to the thick tendon in dean's neck, gently. no teeth. not yet. even when sam's body screams for it, the tender, delicate, unmarked skin above his jugular.

dean whimpers like a wounded animal, hands tightening on sam's arms.

"okay?" sam repeats, stronger this time.

"shit. sammy. fine. yes!" dean pants, and sam smiles, rewarding him with a kiss that dean sinks into like a warm bath. dean's fingers tilt so he can scratch at sam's stubble, and sam smiles into his mouth.

fuck. he's going to rip this kid apart.

[chronurgy]

20 writer questions

tagged by: @lamortwrites (thank you!)

Tagging: @andrigyn, @defira85, and anyone else who's interested! I'm a little behind the curve so I don't want to tag a bunch of people who've probably already done this, but please consider yourself tagged if you're interested

How many works do you have on ao3?

Nineteen!

What’s your total ao3 word count?

65,507

What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. Möbius Strips and Other Such Eternities (T, 8k, Ketheric writes letters to Isobel after her resurrection) 2. Departure from the Vulgar Crowd (M, 5k, dark urge/gortash, first meeting) 3. They Who Seek to Deceive (M, 10k, dark urge/gortash, post-coronation reunion) 4. Would You Give the Devil This Dance? (Would You be a Part of His Plans?) (T, 8k, dark urge/gortash, Wyll goes to a party and tries to square a circle) 5. The Bloody Spectacle of It (T, 3k, dark urge/gortash, a bhaalist observes his god and master)

What fandoms do you write for?

Bg3 is the only fandom I've put anything up on ao3 for so far, but I've also got a critical role campaign 2 wip and some rogue trader wips that I'm working on!

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! Eventually (oops). I always try to respond because comments mean so much to me and I want the person who left the comment to know how much I appreciate it! I'm just, uh, bad at knowing how to do that so it sometimes takes me awhile

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh hmm, that's hard to say! A few of my fics end on darker or less happy notes, but those tend to lean closer toward horror than angst, if that makes sense. I think I'd have to say either Would You Give the Devil This Dance? (Would You be a Part of His Plans?) for just how hard Wyll is working to make things seem okay when they clearly aren't or Not Glory but Power for how the near triumphant ending for young Enver is curdled with our knowledge of where this will lead him.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Also a somewhat difficult question! Probably They Who Seek to Deceive, in the sense that the main two characters certainly seem very happy about how things have turned out!

Do you get hate on fics?

Happily, no.

Do you write smut?

I would say that I haven't yet, but on the other hand my spouse says that I absolutely do. When I pointed out that there isn't any sex in any of my fics, they just said "you know that's worse, right?" So I guess it all depends on what you consider smut lol.

Do you write crossovers?

I haven't yet, but I might give it a try someday

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of! I think my stuff is too niche to be worth stealing for clout, honestly

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, no way is anything I write on that level of popularity!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I have not! I have no idea how that would even work with my slow and chaotic writing process

What's your all time favorite ship?

Really, really good question. Hard to say. I think dark urge/gortash has to be up there. Shadowgast, obviously. Probably Merlin/Arthur from the TV show too (yes I have bad taste).

What's the wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have the start of a very long Gale pov fic that's meant to cover all of acts 1 and 2, plus a tiny bit of act 3. It was going to focus on Gale and Vesper's developing relationship, on Gale slowly putting the bhaalspawn-shaped pieces together, and on moral flexibility and the relationship between wizards and power. So an exceptionally long fic already, made longer by the long-winded chatteriness of Gale's pov reinforcing my own worst tendencies, lol. It's one of those things I doubt I'll ever finish just for the sheer length of it, especially given that I'm not the fastest writer and I keep putting it aside for other projects. Maybe someday!

What are your writing strengths?

I'm a pretty decent worldbuilder I think, though that doesn't necessarily get a lot of airtime in fic. I'm solid with character voice and internal monologue as well.

What are you writing weaknesses?

I get lost in the sauce really easily and end up writing more than is really necessary or helpful to tell the story I'm trying to tell. I'm tend towards overexplaning things and not trusting people to pick up in what I'm trying to say (I'm working on it!)

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

If it's done to serve a purpose in the story, why not? Especially when you're pulling from a source material that does a lot of it to begin with.

First fandom you wrote for?

Almost certainly warrior cats

Favorite fic you've ever written?

It's tough and a very close competition, but in the end I think I have to go with They Who Seek to Deceive. The sheer amount of planning and double meaning I put into everything the characters say and don't say is what makes it for me, I think.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Not gonna lie, this whole thing really sucks. I think I wrote a message awhile back about the very cool feminist angle of the Plus Global Auditions Invitation video, I'm an SNL Army and was new to watching kpop very closely and was so sold by that video. I thought - 'this company is really different.' Going public with a company f*cks a lot of things up, it happens all so often, and often it's the people and the ethos that gets messed up the most. It's frustrating to see this devolution. Because I was really excited by what MHJ was being given space to do at BH/Hybe. Though, as a fellow art school student, I am shaking my head and serious side-eyes at how she says things like 'I'm an artist, I don't know how to read contracts' (obviously I'm paraphrasing) - it's clear Hybe knows she's got the goods but she's not playing by their game anymore. The response and flood of crazy comments and hate at BTS is frustrating but expected, but just such a waste of time all the same. I've also never thought BH and then Hybe were super super smart and long-gaming everything (don't come for me Bangtan U fans) I think they were lucky and scrappy and skillful and making cool things happen moment to moment. Later on they got better at the strategic planning, sure. I don't know. They may need a good kick in the pants to remember that's what makes them great at what they do. But still, I hate the idea of MHJ being cooked even if she seems like a real pain in the tush to work with. Because technically, she's what got me to really buy-in to what BTS & BH were doing in the first place.

***

Yeah, it's a shitty situation.

To be fair, I think at the start, Bang PD was trying to do something different and 'forward-thinking' with HYBE. He sought out good talent going by the hires he did in 2019/2020, managing to onboard creatives like Min Heejin and Zico. Zico already incorporated his company to manage himself before Bang PD approached him, which is probably why he owns ~24.5% of KOZ - his sub-label in HYBE.

But with Min Heejin...

She had partnered with 250 - a popular DJ in Korea and NewJeans' main producer, since she left SM in 2018. He runs BANA (a creative collective) but she'd wanted her own label since the start.

Bang PD knew this, and wanted her for HYBE, so it's likely he made all sorts of promises to get her on board without awarding her a single share. Almost as soon as key creative decisions had to be made post-Global Plus audition, they both clashed, but HYBE as a company was less than 1 year old and it appears Bang PD and MHJ still had good relations... which was kinda easy since he still needed her creative output and wanted to see what she could do. So they let her make her own label: ADOR, and keep NewJeans even though according to Min Heejin, HYBE executives and Bang PD thought her concept and style of music for them would be impossible to sell to k-pop stans.

They expected NewJeans to fail or flounder. Instead, by 2023 NewJeans had become one of the top 5 most valuable k-pop IPs in Korea. If my guess is right, by that point she had no shares in ADOR, no agreement with HYBE's indefinite non-compete clause. She could walk anytime and I'm sure a lot of people wanted her.

Then HYBE approached Min Heejin with the shareholder contract to give her 20% of the company. It's a classic 'carrot and stick'. The carrot was easy to see. Apparently offered her the shares at a very low price, apparently Bang PD even lent her the money to buy it, for a valuation that HYBE considered more than generous, he was in her KakaoTalk chats buttering her up with those godawful emojis lmaooo. He was selling that shit hard. The stick in the contract was the poison pill which essentially tied her to HYBE for as long as they want her.

Perhaps she was aware of the pill and signed any way because at that point they still had good relations with Bang PD and HYBE in general. But according to her, Bang PD kept wanting more control over NewJeans the more successful the group became. Realizing she had to do something about the poison pill, she sought to negotiate, and as is typical in these sort of situations, you fight greed with more greed.

Asking to bump up the multiple on the options from 13x to 30x is frankly ridiculous. For a male CEO I can see it being considered... maybe, but for a woman? In Korea?

I'm sure when the other suits at HYBE heard that's what she was asking, at least one of them almost had a stroke. The logic is simple though: start crazy high and end.. just high. If HYBE was looking to exert more control over NewJeans (for example, every sub-label and group in HYBE changed to using 'bio-paper and ink' for their albums starting in 2023, to help HYBE meet their ESG targets. The only company that's not made the switch yet, is ADOR. Given how carefully MHJ controls branding and album design for NewJeans, I can see this minute detail being a massive thorn lol)... anyway, if HYBE was indeed looking to gain more control, the fact that they'd have to pay 30x if MHJ exercised her options on a whim, would serve as a very strong deterrent.

Given what I understand Korean corporate culture to be like, I doubt she had any friends in upper management to start, but with a demand like that, practically all of them would turn enemies in a heartbeat. It's the sheer audacity lmao. My guess is she would've eventually negotiated down, at least once she was assured real creative independence from Bang PD. But at some point, rather, quite predictably given this is corporate Korea, the need for control and the egos involved decided she had to be cut loose now and perhaps taught to not bite the hand that feeds her.

It's not a sentiment limited to the suits at HYBE. It's followed her since SM and the general public would hate it too, which is one reason I think it's only a matter of time before the narrative switches again to HYBE's favour. I promise you, most regular men in Korea would go red in the face, eyes bulging out their heads, drool and spit shooting out like projectiles, at the thought she would dare to demand such a thing. And in a way they'd be right. It's an insane amount of money for female creative in Korea, but I think given everything else, it also seems like a gamble she was taking as a means to an end. A simple negotiating tactic, given what she keeps highlighting as her main goal - unimpeded and full creative and managerial control.

Bang PD wants to build a 'forward-thinking' company comparable to Western conglomerate juggernauts like SONY and Warner Music, but I don't think these Korean men have the chops to do it right, just yet. I've had that impression of Bang PD for a few years now. He's been getting results, but they are inconsistent and he's got the biggest 'surety' in a sense with BTS, so he's been fine, and will continue to be fine for a few more years at least. But if they are messing up this spectacularly with their first female executive and one of their most valuable IPs, over... an options price negotiation?

And they want to pretend to be better than any other corp in Korea?

Lol.

Anyhoo.

I sympathize a bit with how you feel, but as a Korean woman, I guess I'm numb to it. There's a reason I've never chosen to work in that country, there's a reason why the birth rate is nearing the negatives. It's really unfortunate, and I'm sorry you're seeing a prior expectation you had getting blown up this way. And this latest hatefest on BTS has been quite ugly and isn't near done yet. This whole situation is gross, and even more so when the motivations behind it are so... banal and backwards.

But these are undercurrents that are too simple and boring for the average stan. Burning the witch who is responsible for masterminding the demise of a virtuous group is far more exciting. And so that's how the story will go.

I just hope that by some miracle, NewJeans turns out okay and manages to thrive after this. Because in all of this mess, they will deal with the implications the most and for the longest time.

[teddybeartoji]

mickey!! I’ve silently read your posts for awhile now and I’ve officially written my first one shot, I think I’ll keep posting after. Any tips for being a newbie writer on tumblr?

HAI NONNIE HAIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMG YOU WROTE YOUR FIRST ONESHOT I AM GRABBING THE CHAMPAGNE AND THE CONFETTI IT'S TIME TO CELEBRATE /SRS I'M SOOSO PROUD OF YOUUU HEHEHEHHEE I LOVE TO SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!

AS FOR THE TIPS HMMMMMMM well first things first . don't be ashamed to write for yourself. be indulgent. write what YOU like and what YOU want. the readers will follow,, i've always felt that the more into whatever i'm writing i am, the more others seem to love it as well.

play around with your own writing style. there really are NO rules here. you can do literally whatever you want, however you want. it's very easy to forget that, i do that too sometimes, but when you remember again it's like the sun shines brighter and the birds will sing.. better idk it's a very very good feeling when you know that you have all of the control and NOBODY can tell you otherwise.

theen it's important to learn how to use tags. this is how the people will find your works!!!!!!!!!!!! but please do be mindful of using the RIGHT ones. if you write smut, tag it as smut. if you write fluff, tag it as fluff. it's the same for x reader tags, please only use the tags for the person/people you are writing for, nobody likes to see fics of other characters when they're trying to find something of their own fave.

when it comes to interactions, it can be hard to get traction at first. that is not on you, that is sadly just how.. things seem to be nowdays. likes come a bit more easily while reblogs and comments are harder to get, but please please don't let that discourage you.

alsoooo!!!!!!!!!! it's good to make mutuals!!!!! reblog fics and leave tags on them, reblog art and leave tags on them - i think the more active you are when it comes to stuff like that, others are a bit more quick to follow suit!!!!!!!!!!! and this is how you'll be able to make new friends too so it's a double win!!!!!!!!!!!!

MMMMMMMM I THINK THAT'S ALL I HAVE FOR NOW . do it scared do it nervous do it for yourself!!!!!!!!!! be as self-indulgent as you can!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAVE FUN WITH ITTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rookinthecrownest]

2024 Writing Round-up

Was tagged by the lovely @soupandsorcery ~! Just took me awhile to get to it hehe.

words posted: 47, 168

additional words written: well, that's kind of it...haha. I don't have anything else written right now :')

grand total of words: 47, 168

fandoms: dragon age

highest kudos: Bedtime Stories for a Demon, with 43 :)

highest hit oneshot: I haven't posted any oneshots yet to AO3 but this post of mine (a WIP from The Day the World Disappeared) has like ... 400+ notes somehow ... does that count?

new things I tried: Does writing in general count? :')

fic I spent the most time on: Probably my Rook in Fade Jail fic, The Day The World Disappeared. Thinking through the regret prison and trying to put my own spin on it has been...a challenge for sure.

fic I spent the least time on: The first chapter of Bedtime Stories for a Demon. I wrote that shit in a few hours in one night and posted it and the rest is history LOL

favorite thing I wrote: Yeah, I'm pretty damn proud of that first chapter of Bedtime Stories for a Demon despite spending the least amount of time on it comparatively.

favorite thing(s) I read:

To Write Love on His Arm - by ScribbleScrabbles; Alistair/Trevelyan fic. Absolutely incredible. Based on the premise that Alistair and Trevelyan have been communicating through marks on their arms since he was 14. So good it made me cry. My comfort fic I reread endlessly.

Murder of Crows - by @nightingaletrash, About Alessia De Riva, a bastard of King Fulgeno and her life in the Crows under Viago's tutelage. Really hooked me on the first chapter and her story seems so interesting. Excited to read more!

First Light - by absoluteTomFoolery. Probably the best Gale x Tav story I've ever read. Tav has such a unique backstory that blends in SO well with Gale's it's actually insane. God-tier level writing and plot development. This is THE Gale/Tav fic must read for anyone who loves that ship

writing goals for 2025: Ahhhh hmmm... I would say maybe improve the quality of my writing in general. I always feel like it sounds repetitive/stilted. Maybe plot out my stories/fics a bit more so I don't get stuck and write myself into a corner? Write more in general?

new works: I only have my 2 fics up on AO3 so far bc I'm new :') They're linked in this post if you want to read them.

--------

I'll go ahead and tag @novarunestone @dell-amor-te @thewardenisonthecase @juneiper-art @lightan117& @hawkeish but as always consider yourself tagged if you see this and want to do it :') No pressure as always <3

[sunnydayroleplay]

Hiya Jack! How are u! I missed you so much! Where have you gone?

Jack speaking, and here are your reminders sunspot!~

- If you're 18- DNI, this is a NSFW post and so is the game it is based off of. This is an 18+ community.

- Those under 18 interacting not only jeopardizes your own safety and well being , it jeopardizes mine, and the creators of the games.

- (As well as moral/ethics.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

! Sunshine Insider Information !

This post includes:

-Jack speaking/ Jack POV.

-Fourth wall breaking potentially??

-Wholesome :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey sunshine! I've been as dandy as a sunflower in the summer! I missed you all so very much.

I've been all sorts of places, but one of them I haven't been to in awhile is well... here! Although I haven't been present for a long while, thank you all! Reading all your sweet messages and comments really remind me lots as to why I do what I do!

I also particularly enjoy reading all your requests and seeing what you come up with! However there are some...hm.. what's the word... concerning requests, I'd like to also remind you some basic ground rules. Ain't nothin' wrong with being a rule follower! It's good to be a leader, but sometimes it's better to be a follower.

Now, number on- I... hold on-

(insert comical searching sounds for stuff in tiny ass bag)

Language!

(my bad)

(insert comical searching sounds for stuff in tiny a██ bag)

Better- Oh! Here we go!

Ahem, here's a few thing's and rules I wrote down! Take notes my sunrises and sunsets.

Sunny Day Roleplay Rules and Reminders!

1. Please read the pinned comment and look at my boundaries there.

I'm tired of the amount of people who continue to disrespect my wishes and are actually trying to threaten me. I know I'm not the best writer/blogger, or the most popular, but the amount of people who ask me beyond inappropriate questions or make continuous requests to the point I have to block and report is unreal. I don't mean to be rude, but please. This is the main reason I had to take a longer break than last in the first place. I can't get things out as soon as you send them. And I cannot reply back to messages as soon as you dm them. I have a personal life too, my life does not revolve around this account.

2. CHILDREN DNI

I cannot stress this enough, the amount of literal ELEMENTARY school children I see following me or dmming my other SDJ accounts is unreal. At this point I don't even care if you're 13-14 (I do, but listen and don't twist my words) but if you're 9-12 on the internet talking with absolute strangers about NSFW shit? You need to put the iPad down and please go to bed. It's painfully obvious and it makes me and albeit a shit ton of people uncomfortable. Please, just stop.

3. To that one group of people. You know who you are.

Stop spamming me photos of James Corden on my twitter while I'm at work or sleeping. Thank you-

Uhm...Sunny?

What, Jack?

That amount of profanity is-

Have you seen what you partake in this account content wise?

But-

Exactly.

Anywho, that's going to be all for today! Have a happy, healthy sunny day, and be sure to eat well and drink water. And remember sunspot, I'll always be here for you.