#First post that actually contributes to something
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Aaaaa Yuuna is so cuuutee 💗😆 Her hair is so prettyyy. But with the addition of the new Yuu I’ve come up with a theory that with the pattern the mangas have taken so far, they’ll start switching back and fourth between male and female yuus for the rest of the dorms:
Heartslabyul - Yuuken (Male)
Savanaclaw - Yuuka (Female)
Octavinelle - Yuuta (Male)
Scarabia - Yuuna (Female)
Pomefiore - Male
Ignihyde - Female
Diasomnia - Male
Just something I came up with that i wanted to share with you ^^ Also who is the manga artist for Scarabia 🤔
[Referencing the Episode of Scarabia!]
Lots of Yuuna-related asks recently (and for good reason!) so I decided to lump them all into one post :DD
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Yes, Yuuna is very cute~ The alternating genders of the manga!Yuus has actually been a pretty popular theory for a while now, actually! Some believe this is meant to be the Yuus having the opposite genders as the Great Seven member of their respective books/dorms. But yeah, the pattern seems likely at this point.
The mangaka for the Episode of Scarabia is Majiko-sensei! They have previously contributed a chapter to the manga anthology. You can read more about their past works here.
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I'm not sure if "[taking] care of [one's] appearance" is the right phrase to use (as it unintentionally implies other Yuus are slobs/don't care about how they present themselves, when that's definitely not the case)? Maybe it would be more accurate to say, "Yuuna has stereotypically feminine aesthetic tastes", though it's more immature and preppy than Vil's is. I think Yuuna has a cuteness that's more characteristic of Cater than Vil--but all three of them definitely have overlap in their interests in makeup, fashion, social media, etc. I feel like Yuuna would get along with them both!! We do technically see her interacting with Cater (they take a selfie before he departs for winter break) and are assumed to have already known each other due to the events of books 1 and 2. Too bad we don't really get to see them interact in those books... and that we won't see Yuuna interact with Vil for the Episode of Pomefiore. We'll have a new Yuu by then (which gets into my disappointment with never being able to fully follow a single manga!Yuu and their character arc through to the end of the main story...)💦
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Yeah, it's nice to have variety in the manga!Yuus' personalities, skillsets, and interests! ^^ It makes them a lot of fun to follow, even if we know they'll only be with us for the length of one book/dorm.
I've personally really been loving Yuuta and Yuuna a lot. Yuuken and Yuuka are also nice, but I find that their general characters are kind of similar (athletic and level-headed) and don't differ enough to result in interactions unique from game!Yuu (with perhaps the exception of them being able to physically contribute to battles). This is not true of Yuuta and Yuuna, whose abilities extend to other areas and therefore have a larger impact on the world and its characters. For example, Yuuta's love of food + cooking skill has him shouting at Grim sometimes for not appreciating food, but it also becomes excellent leverage for sleeping over at Savanaclaw later in book 3. You can also see how Yuuna's outgoing personality would draw people to her and allow her to make connections.
The manga!Yuus also speak to the diversity of Yuus we see in the fandom. I know a lot of us were waiting for a girl Yuu (which we got with Yuuka), a Yuu of different body type (which we got with Yuuta), and a very femme presenting Yuu (which we got with Yuuna). Yuuken is also great because he was the first Yuu we got that actually had the ability and the confidence in his fighting capabilities to charge head-on into an OB fight.
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As I state in my pinned post, manga raws generally come from Monthy GFantasy, which publishes new chapters of the Twst manga online each month. You must PAY to access those raws.
In the case of the Episode of Scarabia, the full first volume was released in today. It is avaliable on Kindle through the Amazon JP store. This is still something you would need to PAY for if you're interested in seeing the full thing right away.
I cannot provide full chapters to the public, as this is paid content that I receive from my own friends who subscribe to GFantasy and/or who bought the first volume of Scarabia on Kindle. You can make your own decision whether or not you wish to purchase for yourself; however, there is most likely a scanlation team that will put out an English version sooner or later. Again though, this would surely take some time to get done, especially when there's 4 chapters of Scarabia to translate.
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coldsaturn · 3 days ago
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hiii! i have a question i thought you might be able to answer: how did aftg originally get so popular? i know it was mostly word of mouth on tumblr (still is, i think) (who says this website is unmarketable!!) but what were the early days of the fandom like? personally i've "only" been here since 2016, and by then the series was already decently popular. i remember at that time that the fandom was really welcoming and kind in a way that felt really exceptional to me, and it definitely contributed to me picking up the books, which is the only explanation i can really think of for why it got a bigger following than some to other books which did receive a whole big-publisher marketing campaign aside from it just being well-written. do you have any theories for why it got so massive on here? and do you know how the first readers found it? i hope you don't mind me asking you this, but i remember your blog from wayyyy back when and thought that if anyone had the answer, it would probably be you :)
Hello! I always get so happy when I can talk about the early days of the fandom <3 Sit down here around the fire, let me tell you about this wondrous tale.
So, story time: it was spring 2013, I had just finished a thorough read of In The Company Of Shadows and I was starving for another black hole. It was automatic for me to look up the goodread lists ICoS was featured in, to see what other titles I could pick up, and ended up on the list called "Online M/M stories that deserve to be published". The Foxhole Court was right there (it's not anymore because it IS published <3), so I read it. That was the start of the end lmao
If I remember correctly I didn't wait too long before reading TRK, but TKM didn't come out until the end of the following year, so in the meantime I all but shelved it as something that had incredible potential but that was possibly doomed to never be completed. Fast forward I think the start of 2015 when I accidentally stumbled upon TKM and I couldn't believe I could finally know how the story ended. Nora had a blogspot where she talked about the books (including updates between TRK and TKM), and I remember trying to get as much info as I could on this series. And that was it. For a bit.
So, by the first half of 2015, the fandom was made by people commenting on her blogspot, on her livejournal, the book pages on goodreads, and Ao3 literally had 2 fics ( webarchive gives you what we saw - btw Don't Speak Against The Sun is FIRE and instantly became a new standard for f/f for me). You can still find all this content online. Tumblr had a handful of scattered posts about TFC, mostly Nora's mutuals/friends on tumblr, and a couple of readers screaming into the void with no one answering their call.
I was pretty active on here, especially in the bellarke fandom, and I engaged with mutuals and other blogs often enough that I knew if I talked about something, at least someone would reply. A mutual was reading The Raven Cycle and got me curious enough to liveblog it myself. Instant love, of course, and if you've read TRC you know how strong the found family vibe is. So at the end of my liveblog (we've reached July 2015) I threw out a comment where I recommended AFTG as another worthy title. With the first book being free while the other two were only a dollar each, it sounded a fairly easy commitment. One mutual decided to read it (if you're reading, hi!!!) and liveblog it, and that got the party started.
A party of 2, and I'm not kidding. While we chatted and made up headcanon after headcanon on the phone, the intention was to get others interested in this story. But they'd never do it if there wasn't enough content around to engage with and motivate them to blog themselves, so we started with quote posts, liveblog reactions, a few timid edits and poems. An important choice was figuring out which tag to use (at the time tumblr search only scrolled through tags, not post content): "all for the game" was an actual sports tag, "the raven king" was the title announced for the next TRC installment, "the king's men" was the last book of the trilogy and it wasn't even the free one, so we settled for "the foxhole court" which was an empty tag. Even now my blog content is organized around "tfc" because of it, even though we took over all the relevant tags. A couple other mutuals I had from bellarke fandom got curious as well, and now we could consider ourselves a proper group. We were so starved for fan content that whatever you put out would be automatically reblogged and enthusiastically engaged with. It was a happy little fandom bubble. Then Nora noticed us and started interacting with us, and you got the birth of what would become the extra content page as she replied to our questions.
I possibly had a little bit too much time on my hands because I appointed myself as fandom archivist and tour guide. I reblogged every single post I saw in the tags, and I started a welcome page where I could keep track of everyone announcing they were reading the series. It was meant as a way to find mutuals to interact with since tumblr hadn't yet "canonized" all the tags, and it was entirely possible to lose each other in dashboard chains. I used to reply to everyone reading the series by "officially" welcoming them into the fandom, linking them the page where they could find mutuals, Nora's blog, and the extra content present up to that point. Oh and there was a fictional exy team where you could choose your position and then put it in your blog for fun or roleplay it. I also used smashword's gift system to buy the series for whoever said they couldn't pay for it, just to try and avoid pirating the book (good for word of mouth, bad for sales). This was on my side, but this fandom had so many people pouring their entire heart out I still get emotional thinking about it.
Everyone (before January 2016) made as much content as they could, be it meta, fanart, fanfics, headcanons, edits, wikia pages etc. We had fandom challenges where we pronounced the names of the characters and aftg keywords with our native accent, others where we said our favorite scene. Every headcanon was the first headcanon ever seen in the fandom. The fun thing was that at the time there was a strong etiquette toward "if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything" so fan content really went in all directions with basically no limits. We tagged for triggers and that was it, we had free reign. For those who were around at the time, the sin squad was a group of us fans churning out the saddest/filthiest/fluffiest/most problematic content we could think of.
Then we reached January 2016. We were around 300 in the fandom at that point (I know because I counted them, literally), it had been slow but constant growth where each new fan brought at least other two people with them, and we had around 20 posts per day in the main tag. Then someone bridged the gap between us and the TRC fandom. If you ask me how the fandom got really popular, that's it. The TRC fandom was stuck in hiatus waiting for The Raven King, and now you had 300 rabid foxes spamming aftg content on tumblr, using trk as tag, too. Popular fanartists that were active in that fandom helped making aftg known, and semi viral posts did the rest. We went from 300 to 700 people in a couple of months, and shortly after I had to stop adding people to the welcome page because the post broke. I didn't even know that could happen. It wasn't long after that we were featured in the tumblr end of year recap for book ships. We were so many it was suddenly possible to meet in real life! Cosplays, tattoos, merch. You name it, someone in the fandom did it.
But how did it feel when we were only 20 people and a cardboard dog cutout? It felt like the most chaotic book club ever, and every new fan was automatically a friend. Nostalgia is a lying bitch, but I really don't think I'm making shit up here. We had fun and made great memories.
By the way, if you want to see how things were in 2015, you can! Just go through my archive starting from July 2015 (I think 17th) and onward. You can also search my blog for the tags "fandom history" and "started from nothing and now we're here", whereas here you can find a list of aftg fandom tags I used.
Tl;dr We were starving for good content, we wanted to have fun together, and we were lucky enough to half-hijack a bigger fandom in hiatus. That was all the marketing AFTG needed on tumblr.
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encyclopediamorbidica · 3 days ago
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hey could you two like. not take what i said in such bad faith that you compare the opinions of a black jewish trans man to the fucking mormons.
i literally stipulated in my first statement that i am fucking furious with people who use the term porn addiction to refer to the act of enjoying porn or sex or masturbation. i hate that a genuine mental health term like addiction has been twisted into moral grandstanding for cranks who want to sell self help courses to vulnerable people grappling with some form of religious or moral guilt regarding their porn use, and i don't ever want to associate my own experience of addiction and with addicts with the same kinds of people who look down on drug addicts to the point that even saying the word "addiction" brings to mind the personal failings of an inherently flawed person who is beyond help because they somehow enjoy slowly killing themselves to being in a healthy enough state of mind to not be entirely chemically dependent on something.
when i say porn addict, i mean someone who is chemically dependent on the endorphins released by watching porn, who has to escalate in their amount of time spent consuming porn and in the subject matter of the porn they watch. frankly i find it deeply insulting that this observable phenomenon is being entirely discredited by the both of you who presumably have only layperson's knowledge of psychology, a deeply difficult to prove social science that has been used both to excuse the imprisonment, harm, abuse, and murder of disabled people, women, and people of colour and to classify any form of deviance from social norms of the day as a defect deserving of institutionalization and crackpot "therapies" that involve forms of torture such as ECT, ABT, and "conversion therapy" based on deeply outdated rhetoric the psychiatric community has yet to fully address let alone take reparative action for.
in the same way there has been no published data on how porn acts as a mechanism of behavioral addiction, because we have been so thoroughly outpaced by the ease of access to and social stigma around the discussion of pornography and masturbation in the internet age, there has also been no published data on how social media acts as a mechanism of behavioral addiction despite multiple studies suggesting that social media use contributes to an increase of dependency on external validation through the form of likes, comments, and sharing, and can negatively affect its users' mental health as well as serve them further radicalizing content that contributes to user dependency to form allegiance and notoriety within an in-group.
i don't think you understand just how social sciences work or even what the word "objective" means in that context, actually, let alone how recently these forms of addiction have been recorded and thus how little research has been done up to this point. i do genuinely believe that you care about addicts and about how best to treat addiction while removing the social stigma surrounding both addiction itself and pornography as a legitimate form of labour and art, but come the fuck on. jumping onto a post about porn addiction to separate my take specifically from both the context of what i said and who i was referring to when i said it in order to try and explain to me how i'm inherently wrong about a phenomenon with very little data behind it to validate your own interpretation of the study of addiction feels quite a bit like unnecessary conjecture where you didn't fully grasp my statement and refused to engage with it on the grounds that i was somehow demonstrably incorrect and had to be publicly interrogated over beliefs that in no way underpinned my actual point.
Addiction is a disease that destroys the body and mind. They need mental health support from a professional. It is not my or your place to treat them with gentle hands when they demand we enable them.
The only thing you can do for people suffering from addiction realistically as a layman is take care of yourself and encourage the person to get help.
Enabling them makes it worse and that's what these people want. They don't want help, they want enablers.
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hollow-lime-green · 3 days ago
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hi, anon from "t/b discourse is dumb" ask here 👋 this conversation actually is really interesting and i wanna add a little more if thats okay. (how long is the average anon ask? im not new to fandom but i am relatively new to tumblr and its etiquette... so sorry if this is too long. ive done my best to condense it 😭 there's just too much to say and im a rambler)
i hope i didn't come off as blaming anybody for their response to harassment and such, i don't want to contribute to that. my ire is only pointed toward people who make it their business to hurt others over innocuous fandom happenings, those people who leave dickish comments on fics and send anonhate and mass qrt on twitter. but like i said, expecting those kinds of people to go away any time soon is not really something i have hope for at this point. you put it well: people get so emotionally invested --- and i too Love getting emotionally invested when it comes to fiction --- that logic stops being a factor. people all over the internet also tend to struggle with simply disliking something and leaving it there. you're allowed to dislike/disagree with something without turning it into a moral failure when it's all down to preference and the characters involved are not Real
i just wish more people saw the value in Healthy™ discourse. hell, even if someone's opinion ticks you off, that doesn't mean you can't engage in an open minded discussion with them, if you want to. but people can't do that even outside of niche online fanbases.
i would love to share my own opinions on t/b dynamics for satosugu and to learn why others may feel differently. actually, stsg is the first yaoi ship ive been this invested in, though it's been a while now, and reading fics for them has opened up a Lot of doors of thought for me that i wanna talk to someone about. but there's such hostility around the topic that opening that discussion up to the general fandom public hardly feels worth the risk, as much as i want to. that kinda leaves one floating out at sea here. so i have these conversations where i can, but i'll also block people over simple things. not because i think they're evil or their opinions are invalid, but because i really do just want to have fun, and previous fandom experiences have exhausted me with how much of the same repetitive venom i can personally handle at once
welcome back anon, and feel free to ramble away. honestly this has been a nice side quest for me during the thesis-ing, believe it or not.
if you want to have discussions/share takes on stsg (or fandom meta), then feel free to keep sending them anon, and i am happy to host that discussion in our friendly little corner. i haven't gotten anything nasty in my inbox, and i think everyone commenting and engaging with the posts on my blog is pretty friendly and level headed :)
i think it's possible that some people could get offended by your previous ask? but it's very obvious, to me, anyway, that what you are saying with "t/b discourse is dumb" is "this drama is dumb why are we doing this why can't we just have fun". you can twist the words, but that's the clear sentiment that I think 99% of us are trying to get across here.
and that also does not conflict with empathizing with and supporting people who have been targeted by this harassment. in fact, i would say out of anyone, they are probably most securely in the camp of "this drama is dumb please let's stop".
as @fushiglow pointed out, part of the reason fandom can get so vicious is due to depersonalization. none of these people would be acting so fuckin foolish in person. but across the screen, it is a lot safer and easier to be an absolute asshole than when you have to look someone in the face as you tell them that they are literal scum for your opinions on dick in ass, or something.
over the past few months i have been struggling with this in reverse, actually. one of my gaming group members almost definitely voted for trump (white women... we need to talk). i get so worked up when i think about it, because i hate her for it, especially her reasons for it (she is antichoice). and yet, when I see her in person, when we hang out, it is so easy to remember that she is my friend and she held my hair back when I was puking after my other gamer friends gave me too many free beers (blue moon isn't worth it guys).
one other thing i would like to add, and part of why i'm so happy to post this ask, is that conversations are not sentences. you get to clarify. you get to add. you get to change your mind. real 'discourse' (note: this word has lost all meaning in the year of our lord 2025) or debate is an exchange of ideas, whether it's about dick in ass or how we react socially in the situation of being attacked for dick in ass. keeping the conversation going to clarify these things, like your intent with the last ask, is important and necessary! it's what keeps us from being xitter/bluesky. we don't need to live as zingers and soundbytes on a text-based forum. we have the space to express ourselves fully, as many times as that takes. and i think that helps build back the empathy that is lost with the lack of face-to-face, voice-to-voice communication in online spaces.
so in the words of the great philosophers re: t/b discourse:
any hole's a goal
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starlitnightdream · 3 days ago
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Love Of The Divine Tree FINISHED THOUGHTS AHHHH
I LOVED THIS DRAMA GORGEOUS BEAUTIFUL AMAZING YOU SHOULD TOTALLY WATCH IT. ( if you watched till the end of the moon and are in pain please watch this it will heal you)
Small review: Amazing drama where both ml and fl are very very likable. BOTH ARE AMAZING. This one does not raise your blood pressure heh both are perfect for each others stubbornness to save each other hahah.
About the ending: A great ending . Both come out of the final boss fight alive. no one person waiting in front of a reincarnation tree or whatever ( been there done that in the beginning of the drama instead ) A wedding scene ( fancy hair accessories yay) A proper happy ending they contributing to overpopoulation at this point lol was seeing him do all the work and was like NO? this can't be? the whole drama they were equal -but then they said they drew lots to see who was the shifu and who was the disciple for the day and I was like ah okay fair enough ( best would be alternate lmao but whats the fun in that for them ig)
Now we move on to some longer thoughts ahah. ( btw I still have lots of screenshots to post but wanted to post this first)
Su Yishui: adorable cutie who has done no wrong (if you actually think about it its basically nothing lmao) other than that one time man thought getting the spirit spring would be good for him.he blames himself for mu qingge's death which is pathetic bec its obviously everyone else's fault but his bruh why the guilt for something he didn't do AHHH. anyways best boi. (this drama also shows that tantai jin could have lived happily if he met someone nicer) man went through so much to save mu qingge and xue ranran later best shifu and disciple lmao. ALSO towards the end? they reveal man was so good to people even without mu qingge lmao bro was doing side quests saving everyone woahh. but man really thought mu qingge would blame him after she died to save him?? where did that genius go su yishui?
Mu Qingge/Xue Ranran: Best person su yishui could have ever met she sees him and decides yes this dude shall be saved. can't blame her lmao bro looks amazing and also was literally a sweetheart inside all that hissing cat exterior lmao. The efforts to save him man respect to her. another best shifu and disciple right here too ahah. The fl we all need who literally tells ml nah not believing those harsh words you say to push me away lol. ( because some fls really after the ml cares for her the whole drama one incident and they believe ml is bad???) Love her for defending him every single time and being there for him.
Wei Jiu: this dude was there for the comic effect you cannot convince me otherwise lmao. He and elder Tu could be the main characters of the usual misunderstanding filled drama lmao. Man is not a villain bahaha. man's pretty clueless lol.
Elder Tu: she needs to stop hiding her thoughts lol and with wei jiu especially lol crazy combo there both of them need to just COMMUNICATE BRUH. also she was crazier for giving up after one try wow. her full life she never told him anything and once tried it and decided to give up? not a fan of her hiding it from him because she should have told him he isn't that bad. if she told he def would have done something nice lol.
Su Yu: this guy started off good hmm thought he would just be the dude who liked fl lmao but man had a mini villain arc right there but then went back to do something great in the end lol. but also didn't like him ever since he purposely tried to make Su Yishui think Mu Qingge liked him. that hairpin scene was low ahhhh if he specificvally searched for the hairpin bec he knew what Su Yishui's mom had done.
Mu Ranwu: total evil bish. had no reason to become a villain but still somehow became one lmao. like even su yu fine his brother who he saved poisoned him.. but mu ranwu? her sister SPOILT her. still she got her killed and almost killed her in second life also that bish.
Wang Suizhi: Clown who liked mu ranwu because bruh what is there to like in that shallow evil person. she saved him? thats crazy she tried to kill her sister then but okay I guess... bro was crazy sacrificed his life for her. so not worth it.
these were random character thoughts lol there more but laterrr
still can't get over xue ranran and all the others saying he looked bad with the marks on his face lmaooo its was just some pretty lines bahaha the man looked equally gorgeous lol not much difference with the marks gone ahhh
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17-noodlebird · 1 year ago
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presenting...
The Amazing Digital Circus Road Trip AU!!!! 🎪🛣️🎉
I finally have the courage to post something of genuine purpose here!!!
So this is the summary:
• The events prior to the road trip were… eventful, for lack of a better term. To make a long story short, a group of dimensional travelers opened the eyes of the Amazing Digital Circus, both for better and for worse. What started out so rocky ended up becoming a closer bond for them, as they learned more about the other dimensions, and maybe, just maybe, the enigmatic inner machinations of C&A and their perpetually dark history.
• About 6 months went by since then, with Bubble, and four of the interdimensional diplomats, Beth, Pam, Val, and Garcia, creating brand new maps for the game that the others could explore, while completing tasks, gaining artifacts, and meeting brand new people, all while keeping the details secret until it was ready. The other diplomats each had their own contributions to their own game maps, as did Bubble, but only one knew the ending of the road trip: the main diplomat Lulu.
• The road trip would be akin to the world level-based collect-a-thon video games, a la the Super Mario Odyssey, and the role-playing games a la the Steven Universe: Light series. Twenty-six designated levels were made, each with a different theme, animation style, culture, customs, interactable NPCs, characters in need of help, and antagonists/bosses that they can defeat.
• There is a door made out of mountain rock that needs to be unlocked, using all twenty-six (or twenty-eight, depending on your point of view on the matter) jewels, to unlock the “ending” of the road trip; no one else, not even Bubble, knows what's behind the rock door — no one, that is, except Lulu. She says that it's a surprise for afterwards. Each gem is hidden somewhere in their respective worlds, and the players need to obtain and collect all of the jewels in order to open that door by completing tasks, fulfilling objectives, and defeating antagonists. While the circus players pack their things into the Magical Digital Van (a combo of the Magic School Bus for the cutesy face that only communicates in beeps or radio music, and Vanzilla from The Loud House, in terms of retro appearance and spaciousness in cargo and passengers), Garcia gives Caine a silver-colored crystalline gem, causing a “YOU DID IT” pop-up to appear, startling him. Apparently, the pop-up appears when a jewel is obtained after completing the location’s objective. After the first jewel is placed in the middle of the rock door, The Amazing Digital Circus sets off for fun and adventure, thrills and peril, comedy and tragedy, action and excitement, an obscure all-star cast of side characters, heroes, villains, pop culture references, ties to nostalgia, relatability, and… possibly romance…...? Who knows? The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.
• Each of the Digital Circus members have magical Velcro bracelet communicators that they can use to contact the diplomats for help on tasks, finding out further information, or to just talk to them the same way we'd talk to our loved ones on the phone for hours on end. The communicators also send the circus members notifications for an objective they must complete (do keep in mind they can come much later than usual when they least expect it), as well as random achievements, the same way you would when actually playing a video game. Once a jewel has been obtained by any means, the pop-up will congratulate the circus members for grabbing the jewel, as well as to notify how many left you need to obtain to unlock the rock door. For example:
~ JEWEL OBTAINED! ~
15 out of 26
Only 11 remain
~~~~
Characters:
The original eight characters have been slightly altered to fit the AU, but still have most of their canon traits intact.
• Caine:
Caine is still the charismatic goofball we all know and love, but with a dash of nervousness, inability to understand human humor, especially Gen Z humor, and hints of newfound irritability. He's practically a fish out of water in most of these game locations, not really capable of self-defense outside of his signature cane, and being a lot more cautious and protective with his fellow members, especially his best friend and guide, Pomni. Caine sometimes acts as the dad friend of the group, not tolerating anyone's BS and trying to maintain order in situations he's absolutely not familiar with at all. When around Pomni, he feels kinda at ease, with their dynamic being akin to SpongeBob and Patrick when working together. Hell, Jax even refers to Caine and Pomni as The Dynamic Duo.
• Bubble:
Still the chaotic, anarchy-loving glutton we all know and love, but with a caring side to him. You see, for as long as Bubble could remember, he had been Caine's sole confidant, being there for him during his toughest battles, from witnessing yet another abstraction, to calming the ringleader down after a nasty panic attack. They're even roommates! (my god, they were roommates) Bubble would totally just go with the flow and not worry too much about having to adapt to an environment completely different than his own. In fact, his masochistic tendencies make the perils more thrilling for him! He'd also act as the mom friend of the bunch, acting as some sort of mediator for when things get too chaotic for his liking. He'll also lend a helping hand if so desired.
•Pomni:
She's still jittery and anxious, but thankfully not as bad as when she first arrived at The Amazing Digital Circus. After several months of dealing with this game's BS, she developed an indifference to her situation as a defense mechanism, and has become something of a voice of reason to the others. Jesters in real life are known for not just providing entertainment and comedic nitpicks to the royal court, but were also considered their royal advisors. Pomni would become Caine's advisor after some constructive criticisms towards him and his methods of keeping the others sane and healthy, and later on his best friend, acting as Bubble's stand in from time to time, providing witty banter and friendly roast sessions with the other circus members. Jax often calls Pomni and Caine “The Dynamic Duo” because of the fact that they share some things in common: both can turn into nervous wrecks during stressful situations, both are hilarious to be around, both want to keep the circus happy and healthy, and both care immensely for the well-being of everyone around them. Rumor has it they're also drinking buddies; but nothing has been confirmed…
• Ragatha:
Still our cheerful and good-natured ragdoll, with big sister/ant tendencies. Her hugs are as soft as they are warm and reassuring. She'd be the one to always look on the bright side, even when surrounded by unfamiliar surroundings, kinda like Ruby Gloom. She still has to keep an eye on Jax and make sure he doesn't get up to no good, but during moments where Ragatha and Jax must work together, there are things they can learn from one another. Ragatha would teach Jax the importance of being kind to others as well as taking time to listen and understand them, while Jax could teach Ragatha how to be more assertive and set proper boundaries, making her less of a passive pushover and more confident in taking care of herself first. Ragatha could also attract animals and have them help around with chores, a la Snow White.
• Jax:
Jax is less of a condescending asshole and more of a Jerk With A Heart Of Gold, becoming Pomni's big brother figure when necessary. Sometimes, he and Pomni would get into comedic hijinks of their own, as regular siblings naturally would, even pulling off harmless pranks. Jax is still snarky as always, but this time, being more genre savvy than the others, taking notes of his surroundings, and apparently has a lot of knowledge about agriculture, which proves useful for one particular road trip location. He'll also go out of his way to give someone a hug if he sense someone is in dire need of one, and will offer helpful advice during his more rare moments of kindness.
• Gangle:
Still the cute and bubbly but also emotional and prone to crying talking theater mask, but with hidden depths. Her love for anime and all things Japan is generally what keeps her going, as well as her love for drawing. Gangle doesn't really contribute much other than trying to be as helpful as possible, especially after finding out she can use her ribbons as a rope! Golly! She is, however, incredibly intelligent, with a knack for math, science, and history, as we come to find out in a road trip location, and can even speak and translate Japanese. When Gangle decides to grow a spine in protecting her friends from harm or bullying (even Jax, surprisingly), her voice has a tendency to change to a more mature and assertive business-like tone (remember that her VA, Marissa Lenti, was once the voice of a high school guidance counselor until… y'know.) to show you that you really shouldn't fuck with her. This causes Jax to rethink picking on Gangle ever again at one point.
• Zooble:
Honestly, not much can be said about Zooble, other than they're mostly apathetic, slightly rude, and snarky, being there cuz they can. They, along with Bubble, kinda just go with the flow, but now has the ability to become awestruck or starstruck by the other circus members’ newfound abilities, including Gangle's rope ribbons. Zooble also takes time to appreciate the little things in life, enjoying the much-needed change of pace the road trip brings. They're basically the emo goth kid in terms of personality, but with layers like an onion. Zooble also acts as the bodyguard of the circus members, somehow discovering her prowess in defensive combat, fueled by the innate desire to protect their loved ones at all costs.
• Kinger:
The oldest surviving member of the circus, Kinger still retains his ability to get startled easily from constantly dissociating, his love for insects and insect collecting, and his knack for building pillow forts. Due to being the oldest, he now acts as the group’s grandpa, with his “back in my day” kind of storytelling, and apparent knowledge of how the digital world works. He also offers some life advice on how to get through even the toughest days, him having lived through it long ago with Queenie’s abstraction, and is noticeably a lot more chipper and compassionate during the road trip. He also becomes braver and more empathetic in one particular road trip location, with him becoming less startled easily over time. He apparently is also a tech genius (in reference to MatPat and finnthepony’s theory on Kinger’s past life as The Amazing Digital Circus’s game dev), having knowledge on how to fix machines and software, as well as acting as the gang's mechanic for the Magical Digital Van.
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• The Magical Digital Van:
Built by Bubble, Kinger, Val, and Beth, the Magical Digital Van is the main vehicle the circus members use for the road trip, traveling to different destinations and stops along the way. The Van has a cutesy face that pays homage to The Magic School Bus, with her own emotions and reactions, but can only communicate in van noises, horn beeps, and radio music. Yes, the Van is a girl; a lot of vehicles in real life (including ships) are referred to by female pronouns. Kinger especially loves the Van like he would his girlfriend, much to the chagrin of everyone else.
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• Potential ships(?):
I might be the only one in a sea of Showtime, Bluetooth, and Kingleader, among others on this platform, but I actually do ship Caine x Bubble. When I first saw the pilot, I thought to myself, “yep. These two definitely have chemistry.” I see them as one of those old bickering couples that like to tease each other. They've basically been through thick and thin, gray skies and sunny days, tears of laughter, and everything in between. Also, I'm in love with the idea of Caine just being a tsundere; I find it pretty hilarious to me. And Pomni being the Shipper On Deck in the background. I have a particular fondness for the unusual.
Another ship mentioned here is Jax x Ragatha. Remember The Princess & The Frog where Naveen taught Tiana to relax a little, while Tiana taught Naveen to take life more seriously and work harder to achieve his goals? Well, it's essentially that, like rivals to lovers or something. I love when “opposites attract” is done properly, especially here!
Bluetooth (Moon x Caine) would have been canon in this AU at one point in the past, but now The Moon and Caine are exes (y'all can have exes in fiction btw!). In the past, Caine and Moon dated (and at one point did the deed, *wink wink*), but after the Moon became too clingy and possessive, with a yandere attitude, Caine broke up with her, and Pomni would have helped both the Moon and Caine move on from the breakup, realizing what they had was not healthy. This “adventure”/off-screen episode would be mentioned here and there during the road trip (I want to assume the road trip is like a Season 3 thing, but the show's success might contradict this; oh, well) while Bubble and Caine try to take things slowly.
Hints of Gangle x Zooble (aptly named Google by the masses) can be found, but only in subtext. Zooble makes an in-passing comment on how they find Gangle's assertive voice to be hot at one point.
~~~~
This AU pays homage to… well… A LOT of things that I enjoy watching over the years. It takes a look back on the things I found nostalgic as a kid growing up in the late 2000s and early 2010’s, including things that might also be familiar to other older generations of Gen Z. My most recent fixations (such as Unikitty) can also be found there, including random YouTubers I used to watch all the time, horror movies I grew fond of, some cartoons I still watch, such as Steven Universe, The Loud House, Teen Titans Go of all shows, the DreamWorks and Disney movies I watched as a kid, the older Gen Z memes we're familiar with by now, other video games we used to play all the time, among many others. I also wanted to spice up the variety of the fandom with my own interpretations of the characters, as well as some neat ideas I wanted to share when I conceived them.
With that being said, I hope you enjoyed this summary of my brand new AU idea!
Welcome one and all to
The Amazing Digital Road Trip!
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withthewindinherfootsteps · 6 months ago
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I AM NOW THE PROUD OWNER OF A 400-PAGE LONG BOOK OF ACADEMIC ANALYSIS ABOUT MDZS (both the novel and CQL, as well as the wider danmei sphere, internet authorship, fan reactions in both CN and non-CN spheres, and so many more interesting things – there are photos of the contents list below) >:DDDD
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I only got it this afternoon so have only read the (quite long?) excerpt available online and pages I came across while flipping through, but everything I've read so far is really interesting and well-written. If you're interested, it's promoted on the blog of @pumpkinpaix, where there are also chapter spotlights with comments from authors of each paper/chapter about them and about MDZS in general (which is how I found out about it, one came up in tumblr's 'based on this tag you follow...' recommendation), as well as FAQs (including where to buy it, though I did link that at the start). Alternatively, all posts about it are in the tag #catching chen qing ling!
I really recommend it, especially if content about MDZS interests you! and I promise I haven't been told to advertise this it's just something so so cool... a collection of academic work about MY FAVOURITE BOOK... and I know people do follow me for meta/analysis so this might be the sort of thing people looking at this blog will be interested in..?
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eclaire-went-bam · 5 months ago
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low/no empathy is Minorly Othering in terms of interests (in my experience) because almost everyone i know prefers fiction over nonfiction, because it's more interesting and easier to digest,
but prefer the opposite for the same reasons. nonfiction is MUCH easier for me to parse through. i stress myself out a lot whenever i try to imagine a characters thoughts and feelings, and i end up usually just misunderstanding entirely. oftentimes it's so frustrating i just put a book down and never try reading it again. i understand rhetorical devices, messages, themes, symbolism,,, i understand the book on a technical level when it comes to the artistry of how it's written. but i, for the life of me, in the moment, simply cannot fathom a character's thoughts and feelings
comics are only a little easier bcs they have added help of drawn depictions of thoughts and feeling, but even then it can still be hard. i just can't enjoy the same literature many ppl are into just cus i find textbooks n stuff more easy to read
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ihamtmus · 11 months ago
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it's weird how jhope is Right There and he's like the Most Talented Person but some armys just. don't see him. should be studied
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camelspit · 1 year ago
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screaming and crying and sobbing HOW HARD is it to credit artists
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purplesaline · 1 year ago
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My family used to have two antique Buffalo hides. Not bison, actually Buffalo, that were over 100 years old. No one else in the family wanted them, so now they belong to a local Indigenous public school, along with a 20 year old black bear rug, and that makes me very happy.
Even happier that it took me less than 10 minutes to find a home for them, and a backup, and I still had lots of other folks I could have asked.
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always-a-slut-4-ghouls · 3 months ago
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Duolingo being like “this is the 15th time you’ve misspelled this word, you’re on thin ice” and my ass is fucking crying because I probably have dyslexia but didn’t get diagnosed as a kid and now I’m being reminded of it all over again when trying to learn another language for the first time since highschool
#emma posts#I am just very bad at spelling and making sentences in other languages. I am sorry#I think this is also why I keep forgetting Spanish stuff#even though my first Spanish class was in the first year of first grade (I got held back) and I got the Spanish teacher for second grade#she switched from Spanish teacher to second grade teacher but would give her students lessons#and then took a class in middle school#and it’s the language I’m most exposed to after English#this might sound weird but learning about the history of Germanic languages including Norwegian and English has actually made it slightly#easier to learn Norwegian but I’m still doing worse than I’d like and couldn’t contribute to a conversation#why is making new sentences so much harder than figuring out someone else’s?#it’s sort of like physics class was except I actually want to do this and I’m not in school#I don’t even want to think about trying to learn a language outside of the ones in the pie family#I think I’d die before succeeding and that’s not something I would use much anyway compared to the ones I’m interested in#I don’t think knowing two Icelandic words and some snack names before I started school counts as being bilingual 😅#I’m just sad my grandparents weren’t speaking their other languages by the time I was born#my mom’s parents weren’t even taught much Icelandic by their parents#but my dad’s parents were bi (or tri) lingual as kids#and both of my parents had taken classes on at least one other languages before I was born but didn’t use them so they forgot#what was this post about again?
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transmasc-tabris · 8 months ago
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More screenshots (bonus, managed to find Bull a shirt and don't know how to feel about that)
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#anyway i continue to Lavellan post because i did some stuff and I'm tired now anyway. thinking about the beginning of the game and#how he's mostly leaning into the herald bullshit because he thinks it'll help him belong here and make people like him and how#devastatingly it's going to hit him after in your heart shall burn (I'm basically leaning into it as much as#possible without establishing him as faithful since it's more difficult to make Leliana pope that way but in my head#he took every 'yeah I'm herald I'm heralding so much andraste right now' option besides one with cass and one with Leliana)#like. he doesn't even really believe it but most people either like hearing it or if they react negatively it's in a way that still#acknowledges him as in charge so he'll roll with that. but then. everything in YHTB happens and it's just like. Oh. Oh Shit. like#it was this mix of bullshitting for fun and saying what people wanted to hear and kind of believing that maybe he was chosen by#Something at least. and like. it's not like he didn't do anything on his own or at least without any special abilities but then#The classic seeing all that be swept aside. realizing how this is going to be remembered because it's already happening. maybe#he should have known that the second he was asked if there was room for more among his gods.#but then. what do you expect. his first memory is being discarded (that's not entirely what it was but that's how his child brain#precessed it) and practically going feral because of it and then. having So Much catching up to do when it came to. basically every#aspect of being a person#and like. he was accepted along with Rella but that still gets to you. especially since. sure he didn't fully understand what it means to#be pitied but he could still recognize that from others. could still want to prove he was Better Than That. could still want to shatter tha#sheet of glass between himself and seemingly everyone else (even Rella to be honest. if only because she almost left him behind too). how#would he not lean into being seen as something special. whether he fully believed the narrative others were spinning or not#i dunno i see a lot of people talking about their Lavellan pushing back against the narrative from the start but i kind of like the#idea of going along with it. thinking it won't get that far and surely he can correct it if it does. he's in charge after all. right? only#to get hit harder than an avalanche by the realization that he's not in control after all. he can direct as many forces as he wants#but he can't change how he'll be remembered. how he's already being remembered. and he contributed to it too? i dunno his specific#combination of pride and insecurity and need to just Belong. to just belong as himself. is. compelling#If anyone is reading this Ive seen posts about all Lavellans having the same personality but no one's elaborated? am i just doing that?#i actually want to know. you know. assuming anyone is reading this.#i dunno just thinking about his continuous need to prove himself for so many reasons (partially because of Rella too since#yeah Rella is a mage but not the first or anything. she's just there because people knew she had nowhere else to go). okay I'll shut up now#but yeah what is this Standard Lavellan Personality i keep hearing about?#original posts#but like. something something he's being discarded again but he understands it this time and he can't fight it and just
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nereidprinc3ss · 11 months ago
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do you believe me now? | 2
in which fem!reader is feeling insecure about how inexperienced she is around spencer's friends and seeks his expertise to amend the problem
series masterlist
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: inexperienced reader, oral f receiving, (MUNCH!SPENCE RETURNS), fingering, (very) insecure reader, softdom!spencer, sub reader, nipple stuff, kinda sorta implied age gap, god i'm probably forgetting things pls lmk if i missed something important a/n: i've been laboring at this bad boy every day for so long i had to immediately post once it was completed lol. there will be a part three ... maybe i already started it ..... anyway i love u guys and i hope this is a satisfactory part two!! PLS lmk if you liked it!! hearing from u makes my day :')
When Spencer dropped you off at Penelope’s apartment for your first girl’s night—the hostess had promised you, JJ, and Emily lots of gossip sans 'icky men'—you had been ecstatic. You wouldn’t stop rambling to him about how excited you were. 
When he picks you up two and a half hours later, he can hardly get a word out of you. 
It’s not his fault, of course—well, not really, anyway. It’s just that all the girls had wanted to talk about was sex. A topic on which you held very little expertise and had essentially nothing to contribute. Out of the four, you were the only non-FBI agent, the youngest, and undoubtedly the least experienced. It was like high school all over again, except you actually desperately wanted to impress Spencer’s friends. All in all, you weaseled your way out of sharing without giving away that you were still very much a virgin. Sure, you could have said ‘we did hand stuff two weeks ago’, but you had a feeling these women wouldn’t consider that very impressive. 
But you can’t easily relay that information to Spencer—even when he immediately picks up on your sullen mood. He asks you what’s wrong as you make your way down the echoey staircase, but you hold back, muttering something along the lines of we’ll talk about it later. 
Later doesn’t come on the sidewalk outside. It doesn’t come in the car, or at any point during the twenty minute drive, but you feel it rapidly approaching as you climb the stairs to Spencer’s apartment. He unlocks the door and holds it open for you, doesn’t speak as you kick off your shoes and wander aimlessly into the living room.
“Did you eat?” He finally asks, hanging his keys on a hook by the door and glancing over to where you linger in the center of the room like a ghost. 
“Not hungry.”
You both know that wasn’t the question, but he lets it go. 
“Alright... well, I was thinking—“
“Why haven’t we had sex?”
The question flies from your mouth before you can stop it. It tastes like metal and you wish you could take it back as you stand there, cheeks hot and awaiting a reply. It seems you’ve thoroughly astonished Spencer as he gapes at you like a fish out of water for several silent moments, eventually opting to shove his hands in his pockets and shake his head at the wall as he processes the question. 
“I… I don’t know. We just haven’t. Does that bother you?”
Suddenly your whole body feels intolerably warm. Your fingers twitch against your thighs. Of course it bothers you. 
“Do you just not want to? You aren’t attracted to me like that?”
God, you despise how fragile your voice sounds—how much you obviously care, how insecure you clearly are. Spencer picks up on it, despite your most fervent wishing that he wouldn’t, and approaches, stopping a few feet away. You stare at the span of oriental design on the floor between your feet. 
“That’s not at all what I said, angel. I wish you wouldn’t put words in my mouth.”
“Well, then… say something else,” you plead quietly, childishly, still unable to meet his eyes. Prove me wrong. 
He sighs, which does not bode well for you. You wonder if you accidentally triggered the early demise of your relationship and christ do you wish you could rewind. When he steps closer, when his hands find your arms, you’re not sure where to look. But the low, sweet tone of his voice entices you to finally meet his gaze, charmed like a snake as his eyes dart between yours. 
“You know that’s not how I feel.”
You shake your head earnestly, looking up at him with wide eyes as he slowly rubs your arms. 
“No. No, I don’t know that.”
Spencer frowns, glancing at your lips as he speaks. It’s impossible to not do the same when he’s standing so close. 
“But I’ve told you. I don’t understand how you couldn’t know how far from the truth that is.”
You think back to two weeks ago—the first and only time he’d ever done anything more than kiss you. A different kind of flush replaces the shameful one in your cheeks as you try to make your case and not get distracted by the memories of his hands all over you.
“So why won’t you prove it?”
It’d been intended to come out cool, but instead you sound a little desperate, a little out of breath as you realize you and Spencer somehow ended up so close to each other you can feel the warmth radiating from his body. 
“Is that what you need from me? More proof?”
He speaks so lowly, his fingers press into the flesh of your arms portentously, and you think maybe you’ve poked the bear one too many times. But you won’t back down now—not when you think you might actually get what you want. 
So you look up at him and nod, throat too dry to speak. His eyes are deceptively soft, but you don’t miss the big bad something lurking just beneath the surface of the placid hazel. 
“And how do you think I should prove it?”
“I told you what I want,” you whisper, speaking above your pounding heart. 
“Not tonight, honey. Choose something else.”
“Well—that’s not fair,” you stammer, “the whole point is for you to want to have sex with me.”
Spencer smiles a little, tucking hair behind your ear. “I do want that. I promise you I do. But there are other things I want us to do first.”
“Then I want to do that, too! I just—I don’t know what I’m doing, and you do, and I’m already out on a limb by asking for this much. I know this is what I want but I need you to take the lead here. I trust you, Spencer.” You top off the monologue with an imploring gaze—hoping it delivers even a fraction of the impact that his puppy-dog eyes always have on you. 
He seems to study every square inch of your face as you wait in suspense for him to say something. At long last, his lips part—to no avail for several more seconds as he regards you. 
When the words finally do come, they’re an immense relief of pressure. 
“You’re going to promise me that you’ll communicate honestly. That means telling me if we need to slow down or stop, or if you don’t like something—”
“I promise,” you say, perhaps over-eagerly, offering him your extended little finger. 
An incredulous smile narrows his eyes. 
“Is this a pinky-promise?”
“It is.” You wiggle the finger in emphasis, and he shakes his head, smiling wider as you link pinkies. 
“I left you with Garcia for far too long.���
You shush him, disentangling your hands to cup his jaw and press your lips to his. It’s sweet and smiley until it isn’t—until everything slows down like sticky molasses and his hand is ghosting over your cheek, your neck, the curve of your waist, finally substantiating itself on your hip—the other encouraging you to tilt your head back as he deepens the kiss and you feel yourself melting under the heat of his touch. 
The pressure of his body against yours builds until you’re forced to take a step back, and then another, and another. Without question you allow yourself to be herded toward the bedroom, walked slowly backward as he keeps kissing you and blindly trusting he’ll make sure you don’t run in to anything. The bedroom door clicks shut behind him, and it is in all practicality a pointless gesture—but you find it incredibly comforting nonetheless.  
It’s too warm beneath your sweater and his hands are cool as they slip under the hem, sliding against the curve of your hip. Spencer’s never seen you without a shirt, you realize, as he pulls away from the kiss by only centimeters.  
“Off?” he mutters, thumbing at the knit fabric. And while you’re far from confident, you’ve certainly been making progress in this area. You help him tug it over your head without a word, noting a distinct and surprising lack of terror within yourself as you watch for his reaction to you. Hands glide slowly up your waist and you find yourself enchanted by the slight furrow of his brow, the parting of his lips. He traces down the lacy edge of your bra, skimming sensitive skin as he goes. 
“Pretty,” he murmurs. “You’re… so pretty.”
It seems you’ve rendered him uncharacteristically prosaic. The reaction might be underwhelming if it were anyone else—but Spencer Reid is a man who probably knows every synonym for pretty in the English language. Looking at you, he can’t think of a single one. In an odd way, it’s the highest compliment he could pay you. Your cheeks heat and your stomach flips as he drags a knuckle up the center of the cup, and you can feel it through the layers of lace and fabric. He leans forward, ghosting his lips over yours and continuing to run his fingers over the sensitive spot. “Do you know how pretty you are?”
This is one argument you will not be winning—one he’ll keep bringing up at the most inopportune times until he gets his way. 
“Spencer…”
“Don’t Spencer me. I’m asking you a question.”
The words don’t seem nearly as harsh as they really are when they’re delivered velvet-soft, with his lips and hands on you—when he’s so deftly popping the button on your jeans and dragging the zipper down with all the quickness of a slight-of-hand. It makes it hard to focus, even harder to speak. 
“We have… we have differing views on this matter.”
Generous handfuls of your hips and ass are taken as he helps you tug down your jeans before you kick them off, now left just in your underwear. 
“I thought I argued my point fairly well last time you were here. You didn’t learn anything from that?”
“Mm… maybe you just need to remind me.”
“Oh, I think I have to,” he agrees through a smile you can only hear. Gentle fingers skim up your back and tap the clasp of your bra. “How about this? Can we take this off?”
Any confidence from earlier crumbles and you loose a nervous hum—which is not the enthusiastic yes you’re sure Spencer will be seeking all evening. He pulls away, features etched with the beginnings of concern and a searching gaze. Asking would be unnecessary; the words simply come tumbling out of you. 
“What if you don’t like how I look?”
Spencer doesn’t even blink.
“That’s not going to happen.”
How you wish you could have the same assuredness in yourself that he seems to. 
“But what if… what if you’ve been with other girls who are more, like—I don’t know, just—better? Prettier?”
“Honey, you’re—” a sigh, a pause as he searches for the words—his eyes dart up and down your form, assessing, and when he looks back up at you, they’ve cleared and softened. He pulls you a little closer, rubbing circles into your back with his thumb. “I’m not thinking about anyone else right now. I’m not interested in anyone else right now. I already think you’re perfect, and I’m going to keep thinking that regardless of how you look. When I look at you, I’m not looking for things to critique. Do you understand me?”
As far as sentiments go, it’s a nice one. But the pressure of being seen still feels like an impossible burden. You whine, leaning your head against Spencer’s chest. He accepts your weight and runs his hand over your back as you look up at him. 
“But what if I’m hideously deformed?”
His eyebrows raise. 
“You’re not.”
“But what if I am?”
“Okay. It seems like you don’t feel ready yet, which is completely fine, we just won’t—”
“No!” you protest. “I am ready. I am. But… you have to promise to be nice to me no matter what. Or break up with me if you don’t like what you see so I don't have to wonder.”
“You’re ridiculous,” he says, kissing you, “and the only thing I’m willing to promise is that I’ll think you’re perfect. Me being nice will come as a natural byproduct of that which is very different than being nice by artifice. Take it or leave it.”
A moment of hesitance—but it’s short-lived. This is more important than your insecurities. Spencer is more important. 
“Take it,” you mumble against his lips. His fingers trace up the smooth skin of your back, all the way to the fabric and metal hooks on your bra. 
“Thank you.”
You wouldn’t have thought Spencer’s genius would manifest in being really good at undoing the clasp of a bra, but you can truly say you’re impressed by the ease with which he does it. It falls to the floor, leaving you completely shirtless for the first time in front of him. 
“Well?” you murmur, arms crossed defensively underneath your chest, because you understand overtop would sort of ruin the whole thing. “What’s the verdict?”
“You,” Spencer manages after a moment—you literally watch him memorizing every square inch of your body— “are ridiculously beautiful.”
The way his voice gets quieter makes your stomach flip. It sounds genuine. Too genuine to be faked. 
“So… no breakup?”
It seems that the more vulnerable you feel, the less likely you are to take a compliment. Spencer, who is always seeking patterns, probably recognizes this one, and doesn’t push you so hard this time. After a silent moment, he sighs and cradles your face in his hands. 
“You’re gorgeous. I hate how incapable you are of seeing that. We’re going to talk about this.”
“Yeah, but not right now, right?” you murmur, standing up on your tiptoes to kiss him. 
“Not right now,” he agrees. 
His lips are so soft and gentle against your own it feels like love, it feels like being talked down from the ledge of your own insanity. Somehow the way he strokes your hip feels more nurturing than sexual. It’s like he has sex and chaste affection on tap, able to turn them on and off at will. You’re happy to drown in either. Ideally, both.
After a while, his hands begin roaming farther, become bolder in their excursions over your flesh. Up, down, over your waist and ribs. Clearly Spencer had been trying to ease you into it, but you still can’t hide your sharp inhalation when his thumbs graze the sensitive skin of your breasts. He pulls his lips from yours, hands splayed over your sides. 
“Sit down.”
It’s much too gentle to be a command, but you frown. 
“Without you?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he chuckles, lightly squeezing your waist. “Just sit. Utilize patience.”
You sit on the edge of the bed with an atypical reticence—you’re just a little too nervous for a snippy comeback. Spencer picks up on this, features softening sympathetically as he undoes his tie with nimble fingers. It lands somewhere on the bed and he leans over you, resting his weight on his fists and offering you a quick kiss. His voice is soft and designed to soothe as he speaks, mere inches away from your face, and so quiet it could only be heard at this range. 
“Are you nervous?” Cloth from the duvet pinches between your fingers. For a moment you don’t reply, dropping your head to watch when Spencer runs his hand over your thigh. “It’s okay if you’re feeling anxious, baby. We don’t have to do anything tonight.”
You expel a frustrated huff. 
“I want to. Just because I’m nervous doesn’t mean I don’t want this. I can handle a little bit of anxiety.”
He hums, dropping to a crouch and inserting himself directly in your line of sight. 
“I know you can. But you don’t always have to push yourself so hard.”
“I’m fine pushing myself a little. I pinky-promised I would tell you if I wanted to stop, remember?”
“Oh, how could I forget a pinky-promise?” he smiles. 
How could you forget anything, you think, becoming flushed and silently insolent at his dulcet teasing. 
“Please, do something.” It’s a whisper, brushing his lips as you lean down until you’re nose to nose. His hands are on the back of your legs. 
“I’m working on it.”
“It doesn’t look like it.”
“You’re smart, angel. Tell me why I've got you naked on my bed and I’m kneeling in front of you. Where could I possibly be taking this?”
Oh, you have a pretty strong inkling—but you’re scared to voice it and be wrong. Instead of risking it you shake your head slowly, shyly. What you’re not expecting is for Spencer to duck his head down, slide his hands up the side of your thighs and press kisses to the delicate skin there. It feels good—better than you’d have thought. 
“You don’t know?” he asks, looking up at you through burnished gold-rimmed pupils. “No guesses?”
“No guesses,” you agree breathlessly, hotter than you were when you had your clothes on and all the energy in your body condensed into one point between your legs. Spencer hums like he’s considering your answer, smoothing his thumbs over the soft skin of your thighs so gently it feels like burning. 
“I don’t think you’re being entirely truthful. Lie back, sweetheart.”
You do as you’re told, scooting up on the mattress and falling back on your elbows. Spencer wastes no time in climbing over you, leaving you in much the same position as the last time you’d been in his bed. The sheets feel cool against your bare skin, but he is exceptionally warm and solid over you. 
“I’m being honest.” Lie. “I don’t know what you’re going to do.”
Lips find the most sensitive spot of your neck, dancing over it torturously. The front of his shirt brushes your chest. Your thighs clamp together. 
“I don't like being lied to. Just say it, baby. I know you know.”
“Spencer,” you whine, fists bunching the excess fabric around his waist. Warm breath condensates on the skin of your neck as he chuckles. 
“You don’t like being teased, huh?”
“Please, Spence,” you whisper. You notice the pattern of his breathing pause momentarily before it all comes rushing out at once—and you catalogue that particular plea for later usage. 
“I can’t say no when you ask me like that.”
You push your fingers into his soft hair. 
“I know.”
It was a lucky guess. 
He’s still for a moment, relishing the feeling of your hands in his hair, before darting up to kiss you. 
“I’m going to use my mouth this time,” he murmurs against your lips. Though you knew that was what he intended, your heart stumbles in its perpetual march. “Is that okay?”
“What if I…”
You trail off. This is a very intimate situation which you’re not quite sure you have delicate enough language for. Or maybe you’re just stalling. Either way, Spencer is eternally patient with you. 
“You need to stop worrying so much, pretty girl. I’d love to do this for you. But it’s your call.”
“Love is a pretty strong word.”
“Sometimes I think not strong enough.”
The way he’s looking down at you so tenderly, brushing hair from your face, makes you think maybe he’s not just talking about how much he would love to go down on you. Regardless, it fortifies your trust in him. Spencer is the kindest person you know. He’s so clearly an enthusiastic giver. Why not allow him to give you this? 
“Okay,” you breathe. “You can—yeah.”
As usual, you’re impressively awkward, but he doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, you think he not-so-secretly delights in being the one to fluster instead of the other way around. Rarely has he mentioned his past romantic and sexual exploits, but gathering bits and pieces, you assume he was a fairly late bloomer. He probably knows what it’s like to be nervous and so deeply unsure of yourself. 
“Do you remember what you promised me?” he whispers, pressing butterfly-light kisses to your jaw. Your eyes flutter shut as his lips traverse down your neck, teeth skimming over the delicate skin while your breath catches. 
“Mhm.”
“You’re not gonna break that promise, are you?”
His voice, soft and muffled by your skin, is the most exhilarating and disorienting high. Your entire body buzzes with anticipation, satisfied only where his lips soothe and his body presses against yours. It takes a moment for you to remember to reply. 
“No.”
Reward comes in the form of his thumb brushing over the peak of your breast at the same time as he murmurs, “good girl.”
Your stomach flips at the endearment—you squeak and arch into him slightly. Spencer’s hand slides down your ribs as he chuckles, lips pressed just above your collarbone. 
“You’ve never called me that before,” you shudder as he continues kissing over your neck. 
“It’s not appropriate in most conversational contexts. But I can tell you’ve always been good.”
“Really? How?”
Spencer pauses, pushing himself up to regard you with searching eyes. The places he’d kissed feel cold without him. 
“I just can. You’re thinking too much, baby. I need your focus on me.”
“It is on you,” you huff. 
You watch his expression shift minutely. He loves games. Of course he’d love playing with you. That knowledge is why you’re only partially surprised when his thumb catches on your nipple again. 
“Is it? You’re only thinking about how it feels when I touch you here?”
A stammering nod. 
He toys with the sensitive flesh only a second more, amusement lighting his eyes, before dragging his hand down, down, down until it’s between your legs. Fingers trail over your clothed core, skimming the most sensitive part of you while your breath hitches.  
“Tell me how it feels when I touch you here.”
“Really good,” you admit, a heavy exhale escaping parted lips as he pins you with his gaze. 
“Really good, right. I can make it feel even better. Do you want me to make it feel better?”
Your thighs drop fully open and he adds just a bit more pressure until you’re pushing against his hand in search of more friction. 
“Yes please.”
“Then no more questions. I need you to trust me.”
Your answer is a breathy, dreamy sigh—you’d do anything, say anything for him. 
“Okay.”
Spencer kisses you, absorbing your noises of protest as his hand ceases between your legs and settles on your hip. But you’re trusting him. No whiny complaining. No unnecessary questions. 
Things go much quicker once you’re not interrupting him every twenty seconds to say something. His lips reattach to your neck, retracing their path (albeit quicker) until he’s below your collarbone. You watch in rapt fascination, twisted brows and parted lips as he peppers kisses down over your breast before dragging his tongue over your nipple. A jolted little moan spills out because you hadn’t been prepared to hold one in. Waves of hair fall over Spencer’s face, obscuring him from your vision, but you don’t think to push it away—your body is too busy processing the sensation to be much use on any other front. He darts his tongue over the peaked flesh, eliciting more little open-mouthed exhalations of pleasure from you. Earlier you hadn’t really thought it necessary for your bra to come off—you had no idea this could actually feel so good. A moment later he begins toying with the other nipple and you gasp as a bolt of heat goes straight to your core. 
You curse, further words catching in your throat as he suddenly switches, mouthing at your other breast and letting the cold air chill the other until you have goosebumps. It feels a little like hypnosis—you’re unable to move or speak as his tongue laves over you. Soon he’s replacing his mouth with a thumb again, sucking a mark onto your tit just above your nipple. You whimper a little at the pleasant brutality of it, hoping as he releases that it won’t soon fade. Spencer swipes over the stinging skin and presses a tender kiss to it, almost like an apology—but you sincerely doubt he’s actually sorry. 
Then he resumes his descent, leaving soft kisses down between your breasts, over your ribcage and stomach—when he reaches your hips, he doesn’t pull off your underwear all at once. Rather, he slides the fabric down centimeter by centimeter, kissing the revealed skin like it’s precious. 
This time you don’t need to be told to lift your hips. He helps you slip the final piece of clothing down and off of your legs, flinging it somewhere blindly before getting comfortable between your thighs once more. Your heart pounds with arousal and anxiety as his arms wrap around your thighs and his hands rub up and down the tops of them slowly. 
“God, you’re fucking beautiful,” he mumbles, loosening his hold on one leg to thumb at your folds. They glisten in the dim light of his bedroom as he gently reveals your clit. A soft whine escapes you when he nudges at the aching bud, slipping over it a few times and alleviating a bit of the pressure that’s been building. “Shh, baby. I know. I’m gonna take care of it. You’re being so good for me.”
Fuck. The way he talks to you makes your brain turn to mush—you’re utterly incapable of forming an intelligent thought. Spencer has rendered you a complete idiot, and you’re not upset about it in the slightest. 
He presses more gentle kisses to the creases between your thighs, just above your clit—everywhere except for where you need him most. Everything aches for him in the best way and at least you’re too turned on to be very insecure anymore. All you want is relief. But you’re trusting him. 
Thankfully, he delivers. 
The tip of his tongue grazes so lightly over your clit that if you weren’t this worked up you may not have felt it at all. In your current state, however, the stimulation echoes through every atom of your being. Every muscle is tense, frozen in place—you can’t even breathe for a second. He does it again, a little flatter, with a little more pressure, and you whimper. It’s a delicate thing, almost pained and definitely overwhelmed as he gently begins working his tongue against you. Your head cranes up to watch, your jaw drops. Approximations of curse words try to form, but come out only as, “f-fu—oh,” so whiny and soft it doesn’t even sound like you. He hums sympathetically, but you suspect it morphs into a chuckle as you continue to gasp and mewl. 
There are times where you can hold back sounds of pleasure. When you’re by yourself, it’s typically not a problem. Two weeks ago when Spencer was knuckle deep in you for the first time, it had certainly been a challenge, and you’d pretty much given up. But this—this is something else entirely. It feels like religion. It feels like compulsion. Even if you had the slightest modicum of control over yourself, which you currently don’t, you wouldn’t want to keep quiet. You want him to know what he’s doing to you. 
So you let every cry, every whine and whimper drag from your lungs, unbidden and unshaped. You’re new at this, after all—every broad lick feels so good that you have no fucking idea what do to with your hands or how to stop rolling your hips or how to censor your sounds. 
“Spencer,” you keen in one of the moments you remember to breathe. He moans against you, taking you into his mouth and sucking lightly. Your hips buck. “Oh, my—fuck!”
The hand that’s still around your thigh rubs soothing lines up and down. The one that’s spreading you open pulls your folds apart a little bit further, granting him more access to your clit. He flicks his tongue and you almost come then and there, vision going gray for a split second. 
“Wait, wait, Spence—“ you squeak, writhing and trying not to squeeze your thighs together for fear of hurting him. He pulls back and looks up at you, lips shining with your slick and eyes glazed with lust. Fuckfuckfuck he looks so fucking good. “Please, just… slow down, or I’m gonna… or it’s gonna be over.”
The corner of his mouth twitches as he rubs circles into your inner thigh. 
“It’s over when you say it’s over. You don’t have a refractory period. We don’t have to stop at one.”
“Oh—you don’t—you don’t have to do that,” you stammer. 
“I know I don’t have to. But if you want me to, I want to. You taste so good, angel girl.”
Well, shit. 
He looks absurdly sexy between your legs like this. You have no idea how you got so lucky, but you don’t plan on taking it for granted. Your fingers tangle in his hair. 
“I don’t know if I can do more than one,” you admit shyly, slightly embarrassed by how little you know about yourself and in general compared to Spencer. Hazel eyes sparkle in the warm light. 
“How about we start with one and see how it feels?”
Your voice is breathy when you respond, “okay,” already impatient for him to get back to it. Spencer seems just as eager, immediately kissing between your legs with a passion that makes your lips jealous. 
The flat of his tongue presses circles against you and your hips buck, already ramping up to that point you’d been at before calling a time-out. Slowly his fingers find their way to your entrance and he teases you with them, dipping in to the first knuckle before withdrawing again. If you could form words, you’d beg him to just do it already, but all you can manage is an affronted whine as you tilt your hips down, hoping he catches the meaning. 
Of course he does—pushing two fingers inside you at once. The intrusive stretch adds a sharp edge to the pleasure, makes it more interesting, as your brain short-circuits and you choke out a moan. It only takes a few slow pumps of his fingers in tandem with the pressure of his tongue until your hips are writhing and you’re and mewling desperately, more overwhelmed with pleasure than you’ve ever been. You push his hair back, able to see him for the first time, and fully appreciate the hollow of his cheeks, the way he looks up at you with perfect, glassy half-lidded eyes, the rhythm of his hand and tongue—he takes your clit between his lips once more, sucking lightly, and you’re done for. A pornographic sob escapes from deep within you as you come, but he doesn’t stop. The orgasm lasts longer than you knew one could—although, it’s only your second time, so you don’t exactly have a lot of data to go off of. Your entire body feels warm and floaty, and what he’s doing feels so good you want him even deeper—but you know he won’t give you that yet. Instead you focus on the slow burn of your orgasm, allowing him to carry on for a while until you begin slowly drifting back to earth and it becomes a bit too much. He recognizes the barely-there whine for what it is and pulls his fingers from you carefully, pressing one final kiss to your clit that makes your legs twitch and summons a weak little moan. 
Spencer’s lips find other avenues, over the delicate skin of your thighs and hips and stomach as he slowly drags himself up again. By the time you’re face to face again you’re still breathing hard. You sort of feel like prey underneath his weight, studied so scrupulously, known far more intimately by him than anyone has ever known you before. But there is so much light and kindness in the way he looks at you that you almost can’t make sense of it. 
Maybe it’s possible to be known and still wanted. The possibility spins like a coin on its edge in your mind. An idea you spent so much time trying to nurture and is only just now beginning to sprout. Maybe someone could see you at your most vulnerable, and still find you worthy of kindness. Appreciation. Affection. 
Spencer certainly could, it seems, as he ducks down to kiss you. You dodge it, turning your head demurely. He nudges his head against yours, speaking so, so softly, utterly cloying as he teases, “what? You’re not gonna kiss me now? Is that how it is?”
“No!” you balk, equally as quiet and especially bashful. “Not when you… no.”
“Let me kiss you,” he pleads, so earnestly you turn your head back to face him. His big eyes are hazy, reflecting all the warmth and dizziness you feel. “Let me kiss you. Please.”
You whine.
“I don’t wanna… taste… myself.”
Spencer doesn’t miss a beat. 
“Hm. We’ll need to work on that. Because one day, I’ll make you come just like that again, and then I’m going to fuck you, and you’re really going to want me to kiss you then, angel.”
Something flickers in your core. 
Suddenly you’re not so squeamish. You really want him to kiss you now. But it seems he’s going to have his fun, first. 
“Open.” Without even thinking about it, your lips part. He really ought to be careful with what he tells you to do—you’re all too compliant. Even as his fingers slip between your lips, you’re obediently hollowing your cheeks around them, watching him with big eyes as his own mouth falls slightly open. “Oh, baby,” he croons. “What are we gonna do with you?”
That flicker has returned to a full-fledged throbbing once you open your mouth again, slightly dizzy from lack of oxygen. 
“Can you make me come again right now?” you whisper, grasping lightly at his shirt. He grins like he loves the idea—and you let him have his way, accepting his lips on yours with no complaint. After a few moments, (the taste is surprisingly unobtrusive), he pulls away.
“I would love to.”
-
part three
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reidrum · 6 months ago
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you say ‘what a mind’ | s.r.
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A/N: she’s back and with fluff! (?) exams were really putting me through the ringer but i missed posting so i fixed up this draft i had, i hope you enjoy :D ive been listening to sabrina 25/8 since she dropped so hopefully song inspired fics coming soon 🤞🏽
summary: you get really excited about something new you learned and spencer gets really excited about you
wc: a short n sweet 1k
cw: none, tooth rotting fluff
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With Spencer's extensive knowledge of just about everything, you had assumed that there wasn’t much you contribute to his abundant learning.
You maybe weren’t three-PhD’s smart, but you were smart, averagely speaking. But you knew Spencer was smart, and truth be told it intimidated you. He never made you feel bad about not knowing something, ever. Anytime he gets to talk to you about anything his face lights up like the night sky.
There was, however, one time you had come home all excited to explain a concept from class that finally clicked for you. And the first person you wanted to tell was Spencer.
He watched you bound up to him with a spring in your step, bright eyed and wide cheeks as you told him, “I have to tell you about what I learned about today, it finally made sense to me. Like it felt like a real life light bulb final puzzle piece fitting type moment!”
He smiled warmly down at your eager face, “Alright angel, lay it on me.”
“Okay, I know it’s a little stupid it’s taken me this long to get it, but it’s—“
The call of your name sternly yet fondly falling from Spencer’s lips interrupts your self deprecating preamble, “Hey, we don’t do that, remember? We talked about this.”
Your rants almost always started with some self deprecating remarks, and he would always frown and try to interject and shut them down, to which you’d wave him off under the guise of, “If I stop, I’ll forget!” You were smart, but stubborn to a fault. He loved you for it, but it was hard for him to see you not understand the value you held, the value that your voice and your words and your opinions held. The value that he knew with all certainty you possessed.
A sheepish blush rises on your cheeks as you mumble, “Sorry.”
His fingers trickle closer to yours and wrap around them firmly, bringing you to sit on the couch next to him as he pulls your legs over to rest on his.
“Don’t be sorry, baby,” he says saccharinely, “We’re working on being nicer to ourselves right?”
You nod, he smiles softly back at you and continues, “Okay, tell me what you learned today.”
You start on your long explanation of the inner workings of the nervous system and its intricacies, explaining details and anecdotes that really showcase the inner workings of how your mind processes information.
Spencer can’t help but stare at you in deep fascination, complete with an awestruck smile and glimmering eyes.
He’s met hundreds of scientists, specialists, celebrities even, and listen to them talk about their research in extensive detail and with expansive knowledge. Hell, he’s had to do it himself with his three doctorates.
But as he sits in front of you, watching the person he’s most fond of on this planet watch you talk with so much speed, conviction, passion, with your hands move with purpose and excitement, he truly swears he has never been more in love with you than that moment.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” you ask cautiously.
“You,” he moves closer, “Are so intelligent, did you know that?”
“Spencer, I’m not in the mood for jokes plea—“
“No, my love. You are brilliant,” he moves closer to be an inch away from you, placing his hands on your cheeks, “The way you process information is fascinating. When I watch you explain things to me I can see you organize it in your pretty head. It is actually mesmerizing watching you absorb knowledge the way you do. You’re like, a beautiful puzzle all undone, but by the forces of nature you’re able to put yourself together and bear the finished product to me, to anyone.”
Your eyes tear up, “Spence…what the fuck.”
He chuckles softly, “I mean it,” he holds you firmly, planting you in the roots of his belief, “What a mind you have, darling.”
It’s enough to make you tuck your head into his chest, obstructing his view from your imminent tearfall.
“You can’t just say things like that.” you mumble against the soft fabric of his shirt.
Spencer instinctively wraps his arm around your torso, letting the other hand take purchase in your hair, gently stroking it down, “Why not?” He speaks softly.
“Because…I might think you're like, in love with me or something.” You joke.
His laugh rumbles through his chest and into your rested head, “Would that be so bad?”
“Yes.”
“And why is that?”
“It’s going to be another whole moon cycle before I have another a-ha moment like this again. I’ll have nothing to impress you with.”
Spencer smiles and sighs, squeezing you tighter against him, “You always impress me.”
You groan, “Ugh, you don’t have to say that to make me feel better.”
“You do know that you’re really smart, right?” you open your mouth to argue but he cuts you off, “You always underestimate yourself, but you’re really one of the smartest people I know. And I know a lot of smart people.”
A deep sigh leaves you, but he continues, “And you don’t have to believe me. I’ll believe it enough for the both of us. You and your brain are remarkable, so when you come to me with your a-ha moments thinking I’ll be impressed with your spark of knowledge, just know that I am impressed with you, but it’s more because I get to see you realize just how capable you are yourself.”
The calming motion of his fingers through your hair tether you back to this world, your insides fluttering about like butterflies in an open field. It was hard not to believe his words when Spencer was always so kind to you. It was always so easy for you to play it off like you didn’t deserve it.
But Spencer knew wholeheartedly that you did deserve it, that you were even entitled to it. And he’d spend the rest of his life reminding you. That, you knew for a fact.
“I love you,” you say softly, “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me angel, I love you too.” He mumbles in your head, his hand trailing down your sides in comfort.
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404creep · 1 month ago
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Oh my lord y'all are so into Simon and his little cleaning lady so I had to make more. Working on a series of one shots I'll eventually start posting with this pairing because I genuinely think they're so cute. In the meantime here is part 3 of my little drabble series for y'all!
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The first time you actually speak to Ghost is during one of your lunch breaks.
He shows up for his daily fix of "watching Birdie like a fucking creepy stalker weirdo" and there you are munching on a sandwich at the table.
He kinda just walks over and sets a little package of cookies on the table and then steps back again, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed content to watch you enjoy your meal.
You look at the cookies, look at him, look at the cookies, look at him
You decided right then and there that if he wasn't going to do anything but watch it was up to you to initiate conversation.
So you sigh and push the chair next to you out while taking another big bite of your sandwich.
You kinda just gesture with your head for him to sit and he blinks at you a few times before slowly putting his large frame into the chair cautiously
as if you were the giant masked stalker that he should be cautious of or something
After he sits you just kinda start talking
He didn't contribute to the conversation much besides an occasional head nod and low hum when you say something in particular that he agrees with
By the end of it he's got his elbow on the table with his chin resting in his palm with eyes that are saying "I love you"
You know that audio from the Lego Movie that's like "blah blah blah proper name place name backstory stuff", yeah that's Simon.
Like bro is trying to listen I swear to god but mostly he's just so focused on the fact that you're talking to him.
When your lunch finally ends he just kind of trails behind you like a puppy ready to do literally anything for you.
Tries to take the mop out of your hands and do it himself and you swat him away and keep insisting it's your job and you can do your own work
About 30 more minutes of him glued to your side you kinda crack and smile at him and are like "you really like me, huh?"
His brain like short circuits cause how did you POSSIBLY figure it out??????
He follows you around for another hour before you shoo him away to go and do his own actual job.
He's in a very good mood when he returns to his office
Price comes in to drop off some paperwork for him at some point and he's kinda humming to himself.
Price is like "Something good happen today??"
Simon's just kinda shrugs, but in Price's eyes it's the equivalent of him kicking his lil feeties and twirling his hair.
Price figures it has something to do with you and just cracks a smile and leaves.
He's happy to see Simon happy.
By the end of the day Simon is literally thinking about what kind of ring you might want when he proposes
Like chill dude, y'all basically had your first conversation today......
He's just so cute
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