#FUCK U DAD
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yooo....... it's so bananas October is here already!!! i'm getting MARRIED this month WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!
#personal#I'M GOING TO BE A MARRIED FUCKER IN A FEW WEEKS?!?!?!?!#WHAT!?!?!?!#we're not having a wedding or anyth but we decided.#to get a cute tiny little non-wedding cake from a yummy local bakery.#we just placed the order for it today and I'm so excited!!!#they make these dope ass cupcakes too and we placed an order for some of those too :')#HALLOWEEN WEDDING BABY!!!#I CAN'T WAIT TO CHANGE MY LAST NAME LMFAO#FUCK U DAD
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I'll check in on you in an hour. You'd better not have moved.
[ š± ] olive eyes carefully watched as the man wandered away from her before she sprung up on her feet and absolutely hauled ass in the opposite direction.
he had taken her away from her exercise routine and she didn't want to lose count! she was at... 32 push-ups! wait, was it 32 or 33?
oh titan, she had to start again...
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dad called me a piece of shit :/
#IM SORRY I had to get my blood sugar up before I helped with dinner and that Iām not fast enough for you when you explain to me we need a#salad for dinner and it only take 45 seconds to make but noo ur mad and wanna yell at me about how lazy and stupid I am#you do the fucking same thing all the time and complain about how your lunch break isnāt long enough to get properly fed before dinner#and thatās why youād such a dick in the evenings before dinner but yknow what fuck you#fuck u dad#vent
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love all the cute dungeon meshi pride art but chilchuck would not be caught dead wearing any sort of pride merch. you think that man is going to give out any personal information? for free?????
#he would not fucking wear that.#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#chilchuck dungeon meshi#i also don't think he'd use labels tbh. he's one of those dads who never talks abt themselves but then tells u the gayest story u've ever#heard unprovoked when he's talking about his adventuring days#but the art is cute!#delicious in dungeon
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I love when family fist fights break out in the nursing home room
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I'm giving up, I've tried so hard to be happy but there's no point in trying to even live, I don't even have the luxury of being left alone in an empty living room
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I literally just need to type this out to get it out of my head, so please don't feel obligated to read this. I hate that my brain is programmed to worry and fear that those around me don't love me anymore and are going to leave. Literally since birth I've experienced abandonment and it just never stopped. I know everyone can't stay but fuck I wish the ones who made me feel alive and whole did. I've had so many friends who I thought would be with me till the end, friends who made me feel like I was truly living, People I spent multiple days a Week with for years. Just block or drop me, pretend like we don't exist when we see each other or talk again. I wish I didn't experience and internalize these feelings. I held onto them and now they make relationships hard. I miss my friend. We went from hanging out multiple times a week to struggling to find time, to talking on and off all day to maybe once if I'm lucky and I text first. I know that this is probably all In my head. The worry. I know they have alot going on, but fuck I miss them and my head is screaming what if they leave too? I hate that it makes me feel crazy. I hate that I'm worried I'll annoy him with my, I hope you have a good days. I just wanna feel better.
#im mot reading this back through#vent#personal#them abandonment issues are so fucking imbedded in me#fuck u dad
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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Prompt in Memes 5
Once more, have a prompt entirely in memes because I'm too lazy to properly write one right now lol.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#De aged dan#de aged ellie#dad danny#mom danny#Fuck it make this a Hazmat Au too with a hint of eldritch Phantom form#Hence why no one realizes Danny Fenton & Phantom Dark are different people#No Danny is not ghost king he's just a little shit#Jazz is in Metropolis & Danny is around depending on where the āfield tripsā are#Sometimes he's in Gotham because Scarecrow or Ivy offers a lecture#Most of the time they're in Central though because it's safest for the baby villains in the making lol#Danny is taking classes for both medical stuff (thx Frostbite) and engineering#A couple of time travelling villains ADORE him and his kids lol#āSo u a monsterfucker?ā āWhatā āI mean I saw that ghost hero & I'm just sayin that's not human y'know-ā#Tucker stop laughing at him#Tucker and Sam and Val are also in the same villain school but taking different classes#Save for Tucker also being in an engineering class#Sam is fighting for that Ivy internship#Val is in the specialized Anti-Hero course that focuses on teen heroes who are done with that bs#She got in by telling them (not lying) that she's going to take down a branch of government even if she has to blow the whole thing up#Evil College Au#Danny made a mistake & now everyone thinks that he Val Sam AND Tuck were in a relationship with Phantom at some point#Eveery other student now refers to them as the Petty Exes#memes#meme
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Danny adopts Jason and Dan kills the Joker au
Danny adopts Jason not because of the pit but because he sees how hard the guy goes after the Joker. At first Danny thinks nothing of it, but then Jason gets all the core vibes typical of wanting to avenge something. that would be fine except Jason is a bby ghost and the thing he wants to avenge is his ownās death. Itās a feeling Danny almost didnāt have to struggle with, being that a portal killed him (except it was the reason he immediately went to have beef with anyone that crossed the portal. They were essentially aided with the device that killed him and that made him feelā¦ threatened? Frostbite didnāt explain it all that well) so yeah hereās Danny having a bit of a heart attack because the Red Hood is actively seeking to be in the same room as his murderer which baby ghosts are not allowed to what the fuck. He personally wonāt do it, (cause heās never killed someone) but heās not above asking his older brother Dan to do it.
Danny: think of it as a favor Iām asking of u
Dan: itās murder, that way surpasses a favor
Danny: š„ŗ iāll buy u a donut
Dan:
Dan: make it a half a dozen and youāre on
#now since Danny emotionally adopted jason that makes dan best uncle#danny is in the background nodding in approval#dan also stole Batmanās cape because heās a punk bitch who shouldāve done the world the favor much more sooner#picture Jason in the background having a wild goose to find out who the fuck killed the joker and left the message:#āi know your dad didnāt do it but your other dad wanted u to feel safe.#jason is likeā¦ thatās a crypid ass fuck message#is it for me š„ŗ#jason todd#danny fenton#danny phantom#bruce Wayne mentioned#red hood#dan phantom#dark danny#older brother dan#dp x dc
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been thinking about pok a lot again and that moment when riz told him sklonda was dating gorthalax (in some capacity or another) and pok just went quiet for a bit before he wished her well and like. he's riz's father to such a degree that it hurts. he died young, got to paradise and then said, ok time to go back to work, chop chop. and he does take breaks to listen to riz at his grave and he works in a beautiful meadow when he's not down in hell and -literally speaking- he does sit down but metaphorically he keeps on going and going.
and i'm just imagining that- obviously he knows that he's dead, right? but the human* brain is weird in that way where you'll know things, and you might even sit with them and think you've processed them, but then something will hit you out of left field and you'll realize there are so many aspects of the situation you hadn't internalized yet, and i think that one of those aspects for pok was sklonda, or rather all the dimensions in which her life branched off after he died. because with riz he'd always been painfully aware that his kid was growing up and changing, but with sklonda it's a bit more complicated, it's a bit easier to process the grief of being apart from her, purely on an unconscious level, as being away for work. he's working, she's working, she probably tells him about her work and about riz and riz includes his mom in his stories and it's like, oh this is horribly painful, that i can't be there, but in a way he and sklonda share a lot of what they used to when he was working abroad, no matter how far apart- they're always connected by their love for each other and the quiet but omnipresent nuptial tie and the state of being riz's parents.
and then he's suddenly hit with the reality of an area of sklonda's life that hadn't been on his mind before, considering they were happily and monogamously married. truly just a matter of like, this is not a space you occupy anymore, you're fucking dead, until death do us part and all that, and she might still love you but she loves you like a dead husband like a source of grief like the man she once knew not a living partner. and it's neither of their faults, it's purely a tragedy, and he genuinely wishes her the best because he loves her, he doesn't want her to be alone nor does he expect her to be faithful past reason and the vow they made to each other. but the grief of it still really fucking stings, doesn't it?
#pok gukgak#sklonda gukgak#riz gukgak#the gukgaks#fantasy high#fhsy#fantasy high sophomore year#i have no idea if this makes sense it's an attempt at articulating mush and they exist as multitudes in my brain#and the tenses are all over the place but rly if u get it u get it#im just incredibly abnormal about pok and sklonda ok its so fucking sad#i do hope that at least i articulated that i dont think pok was jealous or anything so benign and unimportant#i do gen see it as him being grief stricken. keep moving keep moving so u dont have to think abt the pain of others moving#and then GAH riz is so much like him. he rly is so much like his dad. help me#dan talks
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uncle buck has my heart
#I AM CRYING#WTF#THEY ARE SO FUCKING CUTE#GIVE BUCK A BABYGIRL#MAKE HIM A DAD ALREADY#EDDIE IM TALKING TO U#SPECIFICALLY#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911#911 abc#buck x eddie#evan buck buckely#9 1 1#sorry for the all caps
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do you deserve to be loved?
#*smashes thru the wall like the kool aid man* im fucking back#we're so back. it's joever. i'm screeching into the sun i'm ILL i fucking sobbed last night i cried during work#i sat and drew during my lunch i finished the lore drop at 7am and didnt sleep and drew until work started at 9#i. um. i dont even know where to start for making shit. i feel adrift i feel lost in the sauce of misery#the way he screamed at his baby self that he didnt deserve to cry. that he didnt deserve to be loved. im fucking ILL#ive talked before abt his bad relationship w his own mortality but ngl i REALLY underestimated how deep this ran...esp w the new dad knowle#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#silver vanrouge#ch7 spoilers#book 7 spoilers#he got a new rigged expression!!! all the new animations!!!!!! as a rig animator by trade i was v impressed and pleased#silver nation. fuck every other book like im sorry this one wins u cant deny it#suntails
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so five and lila being a thing is going right next to allison literally sexually assaulting luther in the box of things we are absolutely under no circumstances accepting as part of canon right
#tw sa mention#cw sa mention#would love if when yall reblog this you could tag with tw or cw sa mention to keep things safe!!#i actually enjoyed s4 and thought the ending was perfect to be so real#s3 really lowered my expectations lmao#tua#tua season 4#tua spoilers#the umbrella academy#s4 was fun they flubbed so many storylines but it was fun and emotional and klaus got a ton of comic book moments and there was bonding#it was fun ok#honestly in my head s3 wasnāt even canon like the timeline split#sometimes s2 isnāt even canon to me but itās so fucking fun#itās all fun and fucking sad and goddammit i liked it more than s3 maybe because there was less incest the bar is really low huh#unless u subscribe to the technically all the kids r biologically related thing (i do) in which case lila/diego & lila/five are also incest#but for this show āwe may kind of be biologically related bc of magic but we donāt have the same last name & dad & childhood homeā is a win#anyway i love klaus always everyday i love them theyāre everything to me#i honestly just really let myself enjoy this season bc itās the last one and iāve been through hell#klaus hargreeves#five hargreeves#allison hargreeves#lila pitts#luther hargreeves#reginald hargreeves#diego hargreeves#yeet my deet
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šā¼ļø
Tag list: @st-leclerc @rubywingsracing @saviour-of-lord @three-days-time @the-wall-is-my-goal @albonoooo @ch3rubd0lls @brawngp2009
#VAQUERO CHECO!!!!#the entire time I was drawing this I was thinking about my lestappen cowboy au Iāll never escape it fr#canāt believe I had a chestappen moment in that au before I even fucked with it#I just knew subconsciouslyā¦#ok I did actually try to do research and look into poncho patterns and their meanings for vaqueros#bc i remember as a child my friends dad had like. their grandfathers poncho and it was a whole thing???#and i remember he explained the pattern and what it meant to us???#and I couldnāt remember if that was like. just personal for that guy or if everyoneās pattern meant something#so I tried to look into it so I could make this one mean smth but I couldnāt find any reliable source??? just like Clint Eastwood movies#anyways. sorry for the flop with that if anyone is sitting here being like why this pattern#anyways shoutout to Mr Ortegon#was thinking of u while making this ā¼ļø#f1#formula 1#f1blr#f1 fanart#formula one#f1 art#annieās art#formulanni#formula one fanart#formula 1 fanart#sergio checo pĆ©rez#checo perez#sp11#cowboy art
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when ppl are surprised that angeal has always been kind of self-centered and manipulative due to his poor upbringing and his manipulative mother making him constantly envy genesis' position instead of actually utilizing his friendship and asking for help from his friend (like zack suggested, and angeal laughed at him)
#gillian hewley the woman that u are.... ruining so many of our beautiful boys#fucked up genesis... fucked up angeal#ff7 said Mothers can either Make you or Break you#reblogs off. the angeal stans are seething that he's not the perfect team dad. no one in the polycule is stable and good#that was obvious in crisis core but apparently no one reads with their eyes :|#ooc
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