#FOR SCIENCE DARNIT

[princesscolumbia]

Pride Month 2024 - Day 12

Here she is! The grand matron of all my megafics and projects!

Fission

Summary:

Ranma is having A Day. The usual wacky relationship hijinks wind up with him tripping while running from his self-declared love interests (it has to do with martial arts, several foreign laws, and an okonomiyaki cart...long story) and falling off a roof (...again, long story) to pass through a stream of water from a broken pipe, triggering the magic that cursed him to turn into a girl with a splash of cold water. But today the wacky cranked right up into the weird when he DIDN'T collide with the other person who also happens to be standing in the spray of water. Usagi is having a pleasant day, actually. She's spending time with her boyfriend, taking in parts of Tokyo she doesn't normally get to, and in all enjoying herself when she gets a call about a monster attack. She ducks into an alley and starts to transform into Sailor Moon when a pipe bursts and sprays her with water right as someone...doesn't collide with her falling from the roof above. The destiny of both Ranma and Usagi has been altered by a random accident that nobody could have planned for or anticipated. Nobody around them is even remotely prepared.

Notes:

I originally posted chapter 1 of this fic back in 2006 on Fanfiction.net, so if you recognize it from that website, don't worry, I'm the original creator just migrating it over here where I'm actually posting my fics and updating stuff. FF.net is now my lowest priority for updating, so if you want to follow my work be sure to subscribe here. Original author's notes: I keep writing fics I keep SWEARING I'll never, ever write! But this one just called out to me, darnit!!!

I shall now tell you, dear reader, my favorite story of being inspired to write a fanfic that I've ever experienced, let alone told:

The year is 2005, the Penultimate Ranma 1/2 Fanfiction Index is still being updated, the Ranma 1/2 Superhighway is still going strong, and FFML is your best place to find new fics and earliest possible releases for your favorites because anyone who is anyone in the ENTIRE ANIME COMMUNITY is on FFML.

So on the Ranma 1/2 Superhighway they maintained a nice page that neatly described the different categories of fanfiction, including but not limited to:

Continuation

Divergence

Alternate Universe

Crossover

Fusion

Crackfic

The 'fusion' one may require explanation for people who aren't obsessed with words and meanings because at first glance it looks like a crossover, and is often called such by those who don't know how words work! A crossover does just that, it takes two plotlines, usually from two different media or franchises, then crosses them over each other. The point of contact is where the story takes place.

A fusion, on the other hand, is when you take two entire timelines and mash them together. The vast majority of the time this means whole characters get fused, as well.

And upon reading that, being the super-geeky science nerd that I am, I had the thought, clear as day, "...so what would a fission fic be?"

That was it. That was literally the start of the journey that would launch Fission and bring us all to this point in time.

[corpulent-guardians]

Ok, so I’m gonna rant a little bit if that’s alright with you all. I really wish there were more blogs interested in wg/inflation and Destiny. I feel like it’s a good world to base that stuff off of, with the mix of science fiction and fantasy it uses. Unfortunately, I haven’t personally seen much in the way of people in the wg/inflation communities who do have an interest in Destiny, which kinda bums me out.

We need more big Exos darnit! And big Awoken too, or really big anything!

[seasideretreat]

Reflections

I know y'all want to hear from me, so I put my pen to paper again, or rather I sit down behind my computer again, to write. I am actually entirely uninspired, or rather I have no method. But that's no matter. I can do whatever I want. I can write pointless, meandering things that are about nothing, and I will still be happy - I'll be happy, darnit! You know what it is, sometimes we wonder so bad about something that it seems the whole of existence, but when we look at it more closely, it really doesn't matter at all. Still, we don't want to zoom in; we don't want to look closely. We just want to survive and live and all that crap. It ain't realistic. It's foolish.

We are reminded here again of Hemingway's saying that writing was just sitting down and bleeding. You know, I never believed this, because I knew you got to be able to say something - you know, force yourself. That is the essence of acting. However, yeah. That's science for ya. I like science, but I am a humanities man, I am learned, not skilled. A humanities man thrives on wisdom and learnedness, whereas a STEM-guy thrives on skill and intelligence. You got to be skilled to do physics. It's not really a matter of knowing many things. Humanities ain't either about knowing many facts, but it is more about quality rather than quantity, in every way; and that's what my primary school teacher said about me: he's quality over quantity. I suppose that's surprising for someone stumbling unto this blog, seeing all those words - not much quality there. But the truth is, I can't write much more during the day than this. You know, there was a Dutch author who said he wrote only 200 words per day. That seems a little few. He said he used to write more, but back then he didn't know what writing was. You know, that really pisses me off. I can write an infinity of words, but it'll all be meaningless; still, it might be writing in some weird sense, because there's words on paper, maybe that's enough. You know, Stanley Kubrick said that at this point the best thing he could think of for a young filmmaker to do was to pick up a video-camera and just film something. Doesn't that fill you with wonder? Everything is worth a movie!

You know, writing really fills me with peacefulness and joy. I like coming up with things to write, and I like to express myself I suppose. I'd say I like the process. What else is there to any activity? You know, I was thinking of Peter Parker's scenes on the motorcycle, I think in Spider-man 2. It's really cool. Peter Parker is a science egghead and he's a superhero in his free time, but meanwhile he makes ends meet delivering pizza. Now does he like the process of delivering pizza? It's a bit of a no-brainer. He doesn't. He probably likes the money. Maybe he liked that it puts his mind off things. You know, but sometimes we don't have a process, that's bad right. When we do something, and we know it's gonna work, but there ain't no process and we just end up with a lacklustre result immediately. That's terrible. Anyway, I was really inspired by Peter Parker. There's something nice about science, but weirdly enough if you know nothing about it it's not so fun, you know, because we like to discover new truths, we like to understand perhaps, you know, but that's all trivial. I used to enjoy reading about vulcanic eruptions and so on when I was a child, but I don't think I was ever instilled with an awe for science. You know, I even read Leonard Susskind's Physics: The theoretical minimum (I forget if that's the exact title) but I did not read it attentively, so I didn't get anything from it. I don't even remember what anything in it was. But obviously Peter Parker wasn't even a physics guy I think, he's more a biogenetics and chemistry I think, although he might be a kind of all round science guy. The thing is, I used to be on my way to become a well-rounded, grounded guy when I studied City Planning in Breda, but I left that all behind because I was seduced by the image of being a wise and learned scholar. Now what makes a scholar? "A specialist in a particular branch of study, especially the humanities." says the dictionary. Now I am bit of a stoicism scholar, but I wouldn't call myself a specialist by any means. Also, all my work at the university was on other things. I tried to deepen my knowledge of post-colonial theory - you know, it stimulated me, the terminology, the writing style, the eloquence, but I kind of hate stuck up immigrant writers and minority spokesmen. In other words, it didn't do me any good to study post-colonialism. But it kind of suits me. I also write weirdly sometimes, just like those guys. You know, I suppose we live in an age where the work of the mind is greatly underrated. But then, what does a scholar have to contribute to the modern world? Now I guess it was never easy, but scholars have always been very important in the world, but nowadays everyone is isolated. On the internet, everybody is a goddamned scholar. You know, everybody likes history, so history remains a very vivid field for scholarship, but the problem is that when we discover something about history it is usually not all that ground-breaking; whereas if you discover something in physics, it is very groundbreaking. You know, it's like we're saying: I want to understand nature. It's a bit silly actually. You don't say: I want to understand reality. That sounds very different. People see a tree and think: hey, nature! But your computer is nature too. A tree is alive, but that's biology. What does physics even really study? You know, we learned calculus in school, and I suppose that was like a really logical step for the educators, but I look into calculus and I really don't understand why I still don't know a lick about stuff like number theory, arithmetic or whatever. Why do I have to learn calculus when I will never be a mathematician? Or rather, why don't I learn what mathematics means for the independent thinking person? But I suppose school is not focussed on making us independent thinkers, it is just meant to prepare us for the job market, although I doubt you really use calculus there at all. And I am a mailman now. What was the point of all that education when I can't even find a decent job?

And I can't help but think that school is just a nice pastime for the kids, but nobody structures it that way; and I never thought about the future when I was young.

[space--cadet-glow]

Theory: The Odd Headcanons of Vaati, Part Fifty-two: Lovely Lilac Locks

This is incredibly stupid, but I don't care. What is the potential science behind how Vaati, of all Minish, ended up with lilac hair?

There's a few candidates, believe it or not. And they are... 1. A random freak mutation 2. It was inherited 3. He was cursed? 4. His possible albinism 5. His possible anemia

1. A random freak mutation Very likely, but also quite pointless and too simple. There's more "wrong" with Vaati than just his hair colour (ie, his paleness and his eye colour), so I don't think something random just so happened to cause all three problems. There has to be more to it than him just being a freak of nature.

2. It was inherited From his parents or grandparents? Also very likely; but there is a problem with that. We have no clue about Vaati's family lineage. Judging by how Vaati was living with Ezlo, this means that either his parents just dropped him off there and never returned... Or... Because Ezlo seems to have RAISED HIM ("Vaati was just a boy...") as well, his parents may be straight-up DEAD. Why? Old age? Murder? Who knows? Maybe they shared his hair colour, too, and were done away with, because...

3. He was cursed? ...the Minish tended to see the colour purple as highly unlucky? I've mentioned this several times before. Maybe Vaati's parents gave him up to protect him from the Minish who were highly superstitious, knowing that Ezlo was respected enough to protect him? I have no clue. This seems possible- although it would be a bit too "evil" for the happiness-driven Minish to regularly do... So maybe not?

4. His possible albinism The other Minish seem to all have variants of some shade of BROWN hair. So, if this is the "default" Minish hair, therefore, an albino Minish might always end up with LILAC HAIR as a result?! This would also explain his pale skin and red eyes. THIS is the one that makes the most sense. This would also help explain why Vaati seemed to not have any friends- he was ostracised for being different (and for all the "unlucky purple" things, too). This could also explain the lack of parents, too- THEY could have been the superstitious ones and just abandoned him ON PURPOSE!

5. His possible anemia Unless Minish anemia works differently than that of real-life human anemia, then no. I couldn't find any concrete evidence of anemia doing anything to hair, other than causing it to fall out.

So, the final verdict? It's not a curse. It's not random. It's probably inherited (but I'm not sure from whom). It's a reason why Vaati ended up so alone.

Vaati's (likely) albinism is the cause behind his lilac hair, amongst other things (including his pale skin and red eyes). It fits quite well, visually and symbolically. It makes him stand out. Makes him different.

Makes him strange. Strange enough to want to warp his form away into something even stranger... And redirect himself just like his beloved Wind...

[chiscribbs]

After watching Great Expotations, I really want to see Rapunzel and Varian working on inventions together even though I’m 90% certain there would be significant collateral damage.

[nutsandlightningbolts]

⁇✿

Text-A-Nerd!

Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text

[Clemont Txt]: Hma[Clemont Txt]: Him[Clemont Txt]: Gosh darn autcrrect, H I M A*[Clemont Txt]: I wanna to cruse the solar system w/ u[Clemont Txt]: Like un taht song by Sinatra? You now the one?

---

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text.

[Clemont Txt]: I’m going to be washing up in the shower before you get home. But I have a surprise waiting for you for when you get back.

[Clemont Txt]: But if you get home fast enough, you could join me in there and you won’t have to unwrap your gift.

[Clemont Txt]: ...Just in case it’s not clear. The gift is me. I’m not good with saying these sort of things so wanted to make sure I wasn’t being confusing...

[the-coranic]

Rewrite: Black Paladin Allura

The main things I'm considering for my rewrite so far are mostly centred around Allura.

First of all, I want to nerf the capabilites of her alchemy. It was way too unclear and convenient, and seemed to come at no expense for her own wellbeing most of the time. The only time I can clearly remember it affecting her was when she healed a whole planet-sized creature from near-death and just fainted for a second. Transferring her own life energy to raise another person from the dead? That's just another Friday afternoon for her, I guess. Nothing actually feels tense with the knowledge that she can just do that.

That being said, I plan on killing off Shiro for good, as much as I love him. As the rest of the team work through their grief together and adjust to the shift in dynamic, they become closer, more open with each other, and stronger as Voltron as a result. I can already imagine a couple scenes that could stem from this, but I’ll get into those another time. I'm unsure if I want to stick with the clone idea, however, purely because the Kuron vs. Keith fight was just 😚🤌💕 bellissimo.

I also want to give Allura more of a protagonist role and ultimately have her pilot the Black Lion. She was the commander in the beginning, and proved to be a capable leader, so her being demoted to a literal foot soldier, in the lion "most accepting of new pilots", and taking orders from a very reluctant Keith has just never quite sat right with me.

Maybe Shiro had a discussion with Allura beforehand about what the team should do if something happened to one of them, so she already knew about Shiro's wish for Keith to inherit the Black Lion and what he saw in him, and insisted on piloting Red, because following in her father's footsteps was so important to her. However, Red doesn't respond to her, so she still has her emotional moment. Black doesn't respond to Keith either, because he's just not ready, so Allura tries, and it accepts her.

And finally, I want her to survive in the end. I don't watch science-fantasy space opera cartoons for the gritty realism of war. My girl deserved a happy ending with her new family, gosh darnit.

[askcolress]

An enraged trainer points the Galar Rusted Sword at your throat and yells “Bastard! You pretended to be my friend and then betray me 9 years ago, and all for what!? Mindless research!? I’ll end you like I did Ghetsis and all of Neo Team Plasma!”

——————————————————————————————————–

This occurrence happens more often than I’d like, unfortunately. Please recognize that I am my own Colress, thank you very much!

((bonus under the cut:))

((i had to fight the urge to have colress pilfer this guy’s broken sword in the name of science in favour of politeness and civility but considering this guy threatened him i think it would’ve been at least a little justified,,

also i JUST realized i forgot to add my friend calvin in this part,,, darnit hgjsdjf that would’ve been so good..))

[aimeelouart]

Local Shinra Cadet attains cryptid status. AKA: Cloud attempts to blend in as a cadet while fixing everything (and fails), the SOLDIER Firsts attempt to figure out what the heck is going on (and fails), and Zack just wants Spikey to get some sleep darnit! (Spoiler alert, he fails)

Combining asks babey!!!

Cryptic Cryptid - 335 words, no pairings, Time-Travel!Cloud

--

“Cadet?” Sephiroth said, baffled.

Slowly, the cadet in question turned to look at the three Firsts looming disapprovingly behind him in the hallway. The same hallway that, by all rights, should have been inaccessible to mere cadets⁠—even very skilled cadets poorly attempting to mask their competence and subsequently catching the attention of the top three Firsts in the entire company.

If that was baffling, then so was the fact that the cadet seemed to be brazenly hacking into a control screen, using a small device wired into the mess of electronics exposed by a pried-off wall panel. Why he was attempting to break into one of the larger specimen containment rooms, they had no idea. If he went in all he was likely to do was get himself caught or killed.

And if that was baffling, then the true icing on the cake was the cadet’s appearance: sunglasses (despite the darkness of the hallway), wild golden hair tucked up into a skullcap, tight-fitted black clothing covering him from head to toe, and, oh yes, a set of enormous fucking wings sprouting from his back.

One of these things was not like the other.

The cadet pursed his lips and considered them for a long moment, fingers still flying across his hacking device despite the fact that he wasn’t looking at it. “...sirs,” he said casually. The device beeped. The control screen flashed. The cadet smiled.

Every light in the hallway flared for a moment before they were plunged into darkness as the power to the entire floor was cut off.

Sephiroth lunged for where the cadet had been crouched, fingers snagging cloth as the sound of rustling feathers filled the hall. The lights flickered back on a second later, emergency sirens wailing from inside specimen containment room⁠—and, by the sound of it, from all the rest of the Science floors. Sephiroth had the black cap in his hand, cadet nowhere in sight.

And a single, pearlescent white feather drifted down to rest on the tile in front of them.

[legaciesandothernonsense]

Just Another Going Solo - Gracie 1.5

Cuddles betrayed me and peed on the carpet

He at least has the decency to look guilty

"Good Morning, Henry!"

Cuddles has no shame

Gracie proceeded to give him a much needed bath

"This house needs a serious update..."

Henry always looks so concerned when he has a bath

"There you go! All clean!"

It had occurred to me that it's Henry's birthday and he has learned about nothing

Meanwhile, Cuddles made some bad decisions

Gosh darnit

After some mild plastic surgery, he turned out ok

Henry immediately claimed Cuddles as his best friend

Why he didn't sit closer to the tv is beyond me

Henry took Cuddles for a walk to the beach

Then the game decided I didn't need to see the reaper come and take Babycakes

Gracie wanted Henry to make friends with actual human children so she signed him up for scouts

While they were at the beach, Cuddles got fleas

Gracie continued her conquests

Henry returned home and discovered that Babycakes had passed on.

Gracie is now going steady with her current man

So this bish robbed us

"She got away this time m'aam"

Henry wasn't so sure about this school thing

The death of Babycakes really hit Gracie hard

However, life doesn't stop and went off fish for a promotion

Gracie wanted her son to do well in life and made sure he did his homework before dinner

"Sigh...really?"

Babycakes came to visit

She decided to nap on her favourite chair

I'm here for Gracie's new uniform

Henry's class went on a trip to the local restaurant

Another one bit the dust

Henry went to the festival to practice his soccer game

While there, he met a cat friend

Henry became good friends with a girl from his class

Meanwhile, Cuddles silently judged Gracie as she fixed the sink

Henry was spooked by Cthulhu and slept with his mom that night

I made the executive decision to invest in an alarm

Cuddles woke the family up with STANK

"How does a small dog get so smelly?"

With the pain of Babycakes' passing fading, Gracie adopted another cat

She then proceeded to move on to her next man

The new kitty (whose name I did not write down like a goober) greeted Gracie every time she came home

A boy and his dog

--

Science Career: Aquatic Ecosystem Tweaker (Level 6)

Heartbreaker LTW: 6/10

[unofficialkfamtranscripts]

King Falls AM - Episode Thirteen: Crop Circle Jerk

View on Google Docs Summary: November 1, 2015 - An emergency at Libbydale Farms has Deputy Troy and King Falls AM on high alert. Mysterious lights? Check. Crop Circles? Check. Intergalactic Gang War? Stay tuned to 660 on the AM Dial to find out.

[podcast intro music]

[S&B show intro]

Ben Good evening! You’re listening to King Falls AM – that’s 660 on the radio dial.

Sammy Folks, we are jumping right into it tonight. We got Deputy Troy on the line, live from Libbydale Farms. Hey, Troy, can you hear us alright?

Troy Loud and clear, Sammy. Heard you real fine, too, Ben.

Ben [muttered] Suck an egg.

Sammy Okay. So, Troy. Tell the listeners what you just told us right before we went on air.

Troy Ladies and gents, in all my years— and I mean all of ‘em— I ain’t never seen anything like this! Not even comparatively close to what I’m lookin’ at right this instant. [faint sounds of police radio in bg]

Ben POINT. GET TO IT.

Troy Gosh darnit, Ben. I’m trying to sell the magnitude of what I’m feastin’ my eyes on!

Ben Who even knew you could see Libbydale Farms from so far out in the Kiss Ass Sea aboard the SS Backstabber.

Troy You know G-D well I’m not on a ship nor would it be called the SS Backstabber if I were. Don’t be so damn sore, Ben! Everybody knows I’m sorry! Plus- [kinda shyly] I reckon my ship be called the- USS Super Badass.

Sammy *pointedly clears throat* Troy. Ben. Let’s put our differences aside and let’s get to the matter at hand. So, Troy, you’re live at—?

Ben & Troy Libbydale Farms…

Troy & Ben I’m trying to talk!

Sammy GUYS!

Troy A-a-as I was sayin. I’m out here at the farm and out past the barns just hours ago, Old Man Libbydale called us in, and acres upon acres, boys, have been De.Stroyed out here.

Ben [accusingly] Where were yoouu, earlier this evening, Troy?

Troy Using my keen detective skills and ninja-like mental agility, I can see you’re trying to place me at the scene of the crime, little buddy. However Ol’ Troy was sawin’ logs next to the Mrs. before. my. shift.

Ben While crimes are being committed? *scoffs* Typical.

Troy Now that’s a low blow just be—

[shouting over each other] Ben NO! NO! Troy —low my pistol belt— Ben YOUU— N— TROOYY!— Troy — Ben come on— Ben — T— OHH Troy — this ain’t about the farm— Ben [mocking] OHH YEAHHH- OHHH YOU’RE SOOO— Troy — and you know— Ben —GOOD AT FIGHTING—

Sammy GUYS! GUYS! [“break it up kids”/dad-voice] I understand there’s renewed intensity between you two, but Ben, as co-host of this show and a respected journalist— put it away. Troy, you’re the first friend of the Sammy & Ben Show and a deputy sheriff. You guys don’t have to be best buddies, but let’s please report- on the news story- at hand.

Troy Couldn’t have said it better myself, Sammy.

Ben [hissed] Jesus.

Sammy So, Troy. Old Man Libbydale called you out— Acres of his lands destroyed. How so?

Troy Y’all ain’t gonna believe it, but you know I always shoot you straight… Two words: Crop. Circles.

Sammy [incredulous] Crop circles?

Troy It’s like a live action Led Zeppelin album cover as far as the eye can see! Big ones, little ones. The craziest damn designs you ever could imagine.

Ben Troy, I assume you and the rest of Gunderson’s thugs— I-mean-”deputies”— inspected the circles, and the surrounding areas, for man-made tools? There have been stories that men with boards tied to ropes can replicate what people believe crop circles to look like. Bending the crops at the right angles, etcetera… did you find—

Troy Didn’t find anything, Ben. Not a board… not a footprint… nothin’ but hunched over crops.

Ben So you think—?

Troy Oh, there isn’t a doubt in my mind it’s from the UFOs or those lights. I mean, whichever you wanna call it. No man made these! And in just a few hours to boot!

Sammy Okay. So, has this ever happened here before, Ben?

Ben No! Nor abductions! Not even lights being so close to town. The past few months- have been a hotbed for extraterrestrial activity— it would seem.

Sammy “It would seem”? So you aren’t certain?

Ben *scoff/laugh* I only said “it would seem” so you wouldn’t get all defensive about it.

Sammy Okay, alright. Well, as much as I hate to say it, I definitely feel there’s a lot more than meets the eye here in Kings Falls.

Ben I’m not one to say “I told you so”… But I DID tell you so!

Troy Just so everybody out there knows: Libbydale Farms is private property. So, unless you’re doing the dairy farm tour in mornin’, this is not an attraction for looky-loos. There is an official investigation still ongoin’ here. Plus, don’t nobody need another person gettin’ snatched up by the Martians either.

Ben *smug snort* Martians are from Mars, Troy. They aren’t representative of all extraterrestrials?.

Troy [defensive] Whatever— Ben Nye the Science Guy. I’m headin’ out to the field again. I might not be smart as Ben about the aliens and such, but I can definitely sniff out a spot where the Williams boys will come lookin’ for Mischief and Mayhem. [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy Deputy Troy, folks. Now, I didn’t realize you and Troy were still so angry at one another, Ben. You can’t let that hostility clou—

Ben THANKS, DAD! — We’re just gonna take a break to hear from one of our fine sponsors. Maybe Sammy here can talk to me about the birds and the bees after we get back.

Sammy [quietly] Maybe…

[disquieting, melancholic piano music]

Soft, disquieting voice What if what you thought wasn’t really what you thought you thought? … Ever think of that? … Here at the Institute of Science, we can help you become what you’ve always wanted to become… A better you, for a better mankind! Call us today for a free brochure and a C-meter reading. That’s “C” as in “cat.” … We’re coming King Falls… Be well! … And be ready.

[piano fades out]

[S&B theme]

Sammy You’re listening to King Falls AM and we are opening up the phone lines to you. 424-279-3858.

Ben We’ll be talking about the apparent crop circle- situation at Libbydale Farms. As well as if any of you out there have had any experience with this phenomenon.

Sammy So give us a call or tweet us @kingfallsam. So, you’ve heard our story, now let’s hear yours.

Ben Line 3.

Sammy Good evening, you’re live with Sammy and Ben.

Cynthia Good evening? For who? Certainly not King Falls!

Sammy Hi, Cynthia. How ‘bout you tell us how you really feel tonight.

Cynthia Weellll, to be honessst, I’m a little rattled over these gang signs the aliens are leaving on our turf. Literally.

Ben Cynthia— there is no way to tell if those circles are- angry orrr happy! even. They’re *huff/laugh* just symbols.

Cynthia So’s a swastika, Ben Arnold. Get your head out of your tuchus!

Sammy Okay, obviously, we aren’t trying to raise alarms here, Cynthia. It’s just, uh— it’s an interesting story. Especially here in our backyard. Would you not agree? Uh, you know, it’s not every day you can see this kind of handiwork – man-made or otherwise.

Cynthia You two sound sooo happy. We’re getting tagged in an intergalactic war and all of us in the Falls are sitting around at ground zero.

Ben I- don’t think that’s fair t—

Cynthia That’s the problem! You just. don’t. think! It’s all Tim Jenson’s fault, I just know it. We didn’t have any flying saucer, land-tattooing bedlam before he chased those lights.

Ben He didn’t “chase” anything! He was driving from work and called to report on a breaking news story.

Cynthia Watch your tone, Ben. I’ll buy one of those rabid, disease-ridden sugar flyers and toss it in Lake Hatchenhaw. just to spite you!

Sammy Goodnight, Cynthia.

Ben Sugar glider. And- they are. illegal.

Cynthia So are illegal aliens, but you’re just getting ready to throw ‘em a parade! I can’t! I just can’t! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy Heh, alright, uh… Line 12, you’re live on King Falls AM.

Emily Hi, Sammy! Hi, Ben!

Ben Emily! I–I didn’t realize you were back in town!

Emily I just got back. I was listening on the way in! My mom and I actually drove by the farm and saw all the commotion over there. Police; reporters— big lawn-mower thingies…

Ben Lawn mowers?

Sammy Uh, y’ know, if you don’t mind me asking, Emily, why were you out of town?

Emily Oh, I flew out to Buford, Wyoming,[1] for the annual small town librarian expo! And I had my mom pick me up from the airport since— Ben was on the air.

Sammy Wow. So you guys are in the taking and picking up from the airport stage of yourrr—

Ben Friendship. Is that the- word- you’re- searching for, Sammy?

Sammy [kinda smug] Thaaat was exactly the one, Ben.

Emily *soft laugh* You guys are so silly. But I just wanted to say “hi” and tell Ben I’m back home now!— Oh! And starting next week, I’ve got a whole bunch of fun activities I learned from the expo to start doing at the library! Hopefully we can get some of the scared kids back now.

Ben I’ll call you later, Emily.

Emily Goodnight, Ben! Night, Sammy!

[click, dial tone]

Sammy Emily Potter, ladies and gents. King Falls Librarian and Ben’s… Friend.

Ben [shyly] Yeah-yeah… Lucky Line 1, you’re on King Falls AM.

Greg Hey, guys! It’s Greg Frickard!

Sammy Hi, Greg! You know, we appreciate you running the ads on the show, sir. It’s so nice to meet youuu… uh, over the phone, of course.

Greg Thanks, Sammy! I— think— we’ve- talked before, and uh, glad to run the spot! Me and Granny Frickard love the show! You should hop on down to the Froggery and we’ll hook ya up!

Sammy I might have to take you up on that offer, Greg!

Greg We’d love to have you! You too, Ben…

Ben Greg, you’re a lifelong King Falls resident… w-we’ve been talking about the crop circles out at –

Greg Oh I know. I’ve been listening, but— I was actually calling about- sssomething else— if that’s okay.

Sammy Uh, yyyeah. Sure thing, Greg. What’s on your mind?

Greg Well, I heard Ben and Miss Potter a second ago and they made a— declaration of friendship? Is that correct?

Sammy Oh! U-uh. Is- this about Emily?

Ben [suspicious] Did you- call before, when Emily was in the studio, Greg?

Greg Uh, noo… *nervous laugh* that must have beeeen… somebody else. But is that true, Ben? Are you and Miss Potter just friends?

Ben [terse] Good friends. *tsk* Close. Friends… Real close.

Greg Huhhh! … Well th- okay! That’s all I needed to know! Thanks a million, buddy.

Sammy Hey— Greg. You didn’t have a comment orr—

Greg Oh, no, no! I j— *chuckles* I don’t know the first thing about crop circles and— what-have-you. Uhh, it’s real interesting and all! but- Miss Potter’s lovely voice just… [sighing dreamily] speaks to me. I always just assumed that Ben and Emily were… “bf” and “gf” respectively, *laughs* but… if that’s not the case, thennn…

Sammy Ben? You okay?

Ben I don’t like putting our— personal lives out there in the public eye…

Greg Well, gee, Ben, I’m— only asking because ifff you’re into friendship with the lovely Miss Potter, and— I’m afraid, uhhh, I might just have to be into courtship. *chuckle* Granny wants to see me married before going into the great By-and-By—

Ben Bye-bye to you too! Greg. Looks like we lost line—

Greg I’m still here, pals! Now about that thing—

Ben [click, dial tone] Line 7, you’re on King Falls AM?

Sammy Did you just hang up onnn—

Ben I would never. LINE 7.

Herschel I’d like to place a complaint, rrright this instant.

Sammy Herschel?

Ben Is everything okay, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel Would I call into you nincompoops if everything was hunky-dory?

Ben I guess not… No.

Sammy So, what seems to be the issue, Herschel?

Herschel All this yackin’ about G-D UFOs and crop circles, for starters. Makes my damn d[bleep]k itch.

Sammy Sir! This is—

Herschel Did you call me to tell me what to think, comrade? Or did I call you to talk about an issue?

Sammy Please continue, Mr. Baumgartner…

Herschel Thank you. So, I’m out on the lake tonight— got up brright and early, so I could make sure I got my special spot.

Ben “Got up early”? It’s— just now a little past 2…

Herschel You the sleep police?! Ya little bastard… I thought not.

Ben Sorry, Herschel.

Herschel So I’m trollin, out on the… well. That parts Top Secret, boys. But I’m trollin, so I don’t scare the bigguns away, and those g[bleep]ddamn sons of b[bleep]chin’ rainbow lights start blowin’ through the sky. Looked like Joseph’s Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat[2] was fightin’ that big Jap lizard!

Sammy Godzilla? Please don’t use derogatory wor—

Herschel McCarthy[3] would’a skinned your ass alive, you Red[4] sack ‘a sh[bleep]t! Can I tell my story?!

Sammy Of course, I’m just asking you not to—

Ben [quickly] I’m on the button. Sammy. Heh. Herschel’s gonna Herschel!

Sammy Okay. So, you saw the lights tonight…

Herschel Saw ‘em? Hell. They scared the literal piss out of me. Got a trickle down my Carhartts[5] look like the state of Florida. I’m out here naked as a jaybird! Not a fish in sight.

Ben I’m sorry, did you just reference a musical, Mr. Baumgartner?

Herschel Oh, just ‘cause I like some colorful metaphors, means I can’t be refined, Ben?!

Ben I wasn’t— I didn’t– im-imply— I’m-I’m just saying—

Herschel [softly, for Herschel] Ol’ Mrs. Baumgartner, (god rest your sexy soul, Edna), used to love those hippy-dippy singing plays. And I’d do anything to keep in those pants, fellas.

Sammy Oh, god.

Ben Awww. [pleading] Can we get back to the lights?

Herschel That Edna. Oh, lemme tell ya… Oh! Uh, yeah– the damn lights! Yeah, so, I saw ‘em. What the hell else am I supposed to tell ya about it?!

Sammy Well, you were calling to complain about them, I’m sure.

Herschel That’s right! I’d like to report that no-good drunkard! Cecil Sheffield! Called that cumbersome ass-wart damn near 15 times to come bring me a pair of skivvies to no avail! Avoiding my calls and his duties as the co-winner of this damn boat!

Ben It’s— so late, Mr. Baumgartner. I’m-I’m sure he’s sleeping now.

Herschel You would take up with him!

Sammy W-well, Ben’s just sayin’ that he isn’t avoiding you so much as he’s, you know— probably asleep.

Herschel Sleeping one off! Soggy son of a b[bleep]h. He knows if I ring the special line, it’s a damn emergency.

Ben So, you guys have made up?

Herschel Made up my ass! If he’s gonna be “co”-anything with Herschel F. Baumgartner, that tally-whacker’s gonna have to keep up his end of the bargain.

Sammy To be at your beck and call in case you… soil yourself…

Herschel Don’t be crass!

Ben So, you guys are actually sharing the boat? That’s awesome! I figured you only—

Herschel I ain’t sharin a damn thing with that son of a b[bleep]h! Stop stirrin’ the pot or I’ll make what Charlie did to John McCain look like foreplay, Ben Arnold!

Sammy So, to the point. You’re calling to complain about Cecil because he’s sleeping through your time of need?

Ben But! He is corroborating seeing the lights, Sammy! That’s a big deal.

Herschel Just have an intern or something bring me some britches and stop fiddle fu[bleep]ing fuss! 32 long! I’ll be at Begley’s. He’s probably peering out his window lookin for a damn show… I don’t like beige! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy You’re on King Falls AM with Sammy and Ben.

Riley Please hold the line for Mayor Grisham.

Sammy This again?

Ben *groans*

Sammy You know, I wonder, do you wake him when we say special keywords, or…?

Riley Mayor? You’re on with Sammy and Ben.

Grisham Sammy. Ben. I hate to rain on your little topic of discussion tonight, but let’s shut it down. It’d be much appreciated.

Ben What??

Sammy The always-fair, Mayor Grisham, folks. Remember this come election time next year.

Grisham Do you think that a public servant should have to call the local “Tom & Joe Chucklehut Show” to ask them not to jeopardize a police investigation?

Sammy Do you ever call Channel 13 and tell them what to report and how? We are a topical late night talk show, Grisham.

Grisham Mayor.

Sammy I didn’t vote for you.

Grisham Fair enough. I don’t expect you to respect anything but your own pathetic grab for ratings. Now, regarding Channel 13—

Ben Sorry, Mayor. Obviously, Sammy is flustered. He wouldn’t have used such a bad example if he was thinking straight—

Grisham The answer to your question, Sammy, is no. I wouldn’t call in and tell a reputable news agency how to do their job. BUT, amazingly enough, I continue to have to ask you to stop your rhetoric— seemingly once a month or so. Interesting, don’t you think?

Ben You do realize the only people that watch Channel 13 are drunks that can’t find the remote and animals left alone with the TV on, right?

Grisham Whatever helps you sleep better, Ben. I can tell you for a fact that, right now, Storm Sanders is probably not working a “local yokel” interview and digging up the muck. He’s reporting on city ordinance 29.44371.

Ben Storm is knee deep in a barrel of backyard bathtub hooch during commercial breaks.

Sammy So, Mayor. What is this ordinance? Ya know, since we aren’t reporting the news to your liking, give us a glimpse into what works for you.

Grisham The add-on to the local YMCA? The new menu over at Rose’s! I’m not paid a handsome salary to do your job.

Sammy Oh, right! I forget you think you can dictate what we report on, for free.

Ben Sammy… they’re destroying the crop circles! That’s the ordinance!

Grisham There’s hope for you yet, Ben. Don’t go down with this ship. I’ll put a good word in for you elsewhere.

Sammy You son of a b[bleep]h! You’re destroying the crop circles?! That could be the only thing that brings Tim Jenson home!

Grisham Don’t bring Tim Jenson into this! The city is paying Libbydale Farms a fair share for their remaining crops! But it is in the public’s best interest to mow down this batch of mischief accordingly! Especially after this broadcast.

Sammy *derisive scoff/laugh* You are despicable.

Grisham These affairs aren’t your business to ramble on about… Do the weather! Talk about traffic! I mean, I filled those potholes! Stop making trouble!

Sammy Freedom of the Press. When your assistant isn’t typing out our every word, maybe have her look it up and tell you all about it.

Grisham I can’t wait to hear about it! And here’s a little phrase for you to look up too! OBSTRUCTION OF JUSTICE.

Sammy Uh-huh.

Grisham Do you think using your connections to officers of the law to report on “breaking news” is fine and dandy, Stevens?? *sniffs* You are perverting the course of this case. Things— especially ongoing issues— aren’t meant to be talked about until all the facts are out there! And you— *sniffs* IDIOTS are playing on the scene, reporting with your bagel-eating buddy! who happens to be a cop.

Ben *scoffs* ‘s not my buddy.

Sammy BEN.

Ben I’m not throwing you under the bus, Sammy. I just hate Troy.

Grisham So, the moral of the story would be, gents… some things require couth. Some things require kid gloves when handling. And most things don’t need to be aired in the public for ratings and entertainment. A perfect example being how, I’m sure Sheriff Gunderson will handle Deputy Krieghauser on his own, for calling into this joke of a show with police business constantly. Doubt you’ll see that done during a press conference.

Ben Uh… is that… really necessary, sir?

Grisham This show is a breeding ground for incompetence, and you’re now dragging your pals down with you. Straighten Up and Fly Right.

Sammy Troy doesn’t need to be punished for you to make your point, Grisham.

Grisham Out Of My Hands… I’ve already had Riley send my opinions on it over to the good sheriff! Now again, I ask you: pick a different topic of discussion. Maybe one that won’t lead to the continued pain and misery for all those around you. Night night, fellas! [click]

[dial tone]

Sammy [quickly] I’m gonna call Troy.

Ben Umm, uh *nervous stuttering* W-we’ll be back after this— King Falls. We’ll- we’ll take some- calls about uhh… *helpless scoff* I guess we’ll- see…

[KFAM outro]

[CREDITS]

References

[1] Buford, Wyoming - “America’s Smallest Town”, Buford is mostly just a convenience store/gas station. The population was 1-2 from ~1995 until it was completely abandoned in 2017.

[2] Joseph’s Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat - Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat is a musical comedy with lyrics by Tim Rice and music by Andrew Lloyd Webber. The story is based on the "coat of many colors" story of Joseph from the Bible's Book of Genesis.

[3] McCarthy - Joseph Raymond McCarthy was a Republican U.S. Senator from 1947 until his death in 1957. Beginning in 1950, McCarthy became the most visible public face of the “Red Scare”, a period in the United States in which Cold War tensions fueled fears of widespread Communist subversion. He is known for alleging that numerous Communists and Soviet spies and sympathizers had infiltrated the United States federal government, universities, film industry, and elsewhere.

[4] Red - Communist

[5] Carhartts - Carhartt, Inc., is a U.S.-based apparel company founded in 1889. Carhartt is known for its work clothes, such as jackets, coats, overalls, coveralls, vests, shirts, jeans, dungarees, fire-resistant clothing and hunting clothing.

[brushes-of-sage]

*casually pretends I know how varian got his powers and totally have a plan* And ah darnit now all i can think of is a helpless animatic with quirin and ulla, im not gonna make it but my mind is tho. Ok but seriously I was thinking about Donella and what she wants with his powers, and she just wants to research at first, answer some questions like how it works, what exactly he can do(cuz “ice powers” is a little vague)where it comes from, what his limits r. She’s especially intrigued, bc(1/4)

“ice powers'' could mean controlling snow and as a result could see this as “playing god” or whatever the phrase is. I was kinda thinking a la the sundrop alchemist(u read that right?), but its a little less torture-y and a little more research-y, so she doesnt just hurt him to hurt him. Its more of a“do what i say or i hurt u and/or ur brother”and a“pushing him to his absolute limits”kind of hurt. Outside of that im afraid im at a loss tbh. Does she want to extract his power and sell it?(2/4)

Does she want to sell him? Does she want to use his power against arendelle? Does she want to threaten him to use his powers and commit various crimes(theft maybe?)that will help further her research? If so what is she studying now that requires committing various crimes? Nothing feels right, but i dont have much experience writing her, so ideas r appreciated. But also to answer ur question, anything the citizens heard about were really just that, rumors. Some thought they saw snow indoors(3/4)

when the princes were playing together and thats how it started. Mostly its just something that the local conspiracy theorists obsess over, and is told to children as fun bedtime tales. Also i just wanna thank u 4 all the feedback and questions u give me, it really helps fill in the holes i didnt realize needed filling!(4/4) -💙

Hehehe I feel ya - my brain just comes up with all of these amazing ideas for animatics but I neither have the skill or the talent to make them so I simply enjoy them as daydreams and regular dreams 😂

And yes! I’ve definitely read The Sundrop Alchemist (so flipping good omigosh @whitecatindisguise the angst was wonderful *chef kiss*) so I see what you’re getting there.

So hmm.... research for research’s sake, and in trying to milk out all the information possible on this strange phenomenon (and yeah, magic may be a thing in their world but I wouldn’t think it’s quite common among people themselves) - she probably has an emotional distance to perform those tests, willing to see Varian more as a subject of study rather than a person, which would make it easier to push the limits of said study. So like you said, she’s not hurting just to hurt, but for progress and breakthroughs, you’ve gotta make some sacrifices for the sake of science, amirite? And maybe you’ve gotta provide some incentive for his cooperation but that’s all for the sake of science 🙃

But oof, I feel your struggle. It seems though that she’s a research and knowledge oriented person, so maybe she won’t exactly seek Varian’s powers out to use him in explicitly illegal endeavors but maybe just how to use that knowledge and ability, potentially, for herself? So I wouldn’t think she’d sink to petty thievery but possibly something along the lines of science crossing extreme moral bounds? (All I can think of now is Victor Frankenstein akfjakjs - “the question is not what you can do, the question is what you should do” - paraphrased lyrics but lol, my thoughts)

But ohhhh, I like the idea of the rumors turning into bedtime stories! Like there’s definitely gonna be conspiracy theories but the thought of having them become stories for kids too is a soft thought (I mean, if they’re not like scary stories to make kids be good, you know? 😅)

But ahhhh, no probs!!! I love these thoughts about Donella’s involvement here!!! 😱

[brightstarkid]

Twisted has the best lyrics, don’t @ me

These are just a few (okay a lot) of my favorites

Cause if you’re good and you’re attractive no need to be proactive / Good things will just happen to you

If you’re sure of your intention, some magic intervention will give you the edge that you need

But ugliness permits a man to use his wits cause pretty people never have to try

What I call planning, they call scheming / What I call delusion, they call dreaming / Why am I the only one who sees things as they are?

Who would seek employment when life offers such enjoyment

Just one question, why man? / Cause you stole my daughter’s hymen 

Intellectual property, whatever that means

Follow the golden rule for life’s a two-way street / keep that in mind and you’ll be kind to everyone you meet

Simple reciprocity is always my philosophy

I want to know your story so make the story last / I want to know each twist and turn

But fate had planned an unexpected twist

But wishes are dreams and dreams are pretend / So science and reason win out in the end

I’ll be the one who plunders her cave of wonders

It puts a damper on our love if you don’t have a head

I'm a god on Earth but darnit even deities incarnate now and then can feel a little insecure

She may not love me yet but I'm willing to bet that once I kill all her people she will

Shining, sparkling, metallic, and a little bit phallic

Subtle, yet slightly lewd but if you’re shrewd they’ll put you in the mood

The question then is whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to be well-liked but ineffectual, or moral but maligned?

The road ahead may twist but I will never swerve 

Somewhere deep within you like a tiny seed waiting to grow into a flower / You have the power to lead

The power to love one another is the greatest power of all

[mightevenwrite]

WIP INTRO

THE INEVITABLE DISAPPOINTMENT OF EXISTENCE

[Unumgängliche Enttäuschungen der Existenz] (Working Title)

--My Nanowrimo project--

GENRE: science fiction, fantasy, ya/na

NANOWRIMO GOAL: Complete first draft (~50K Words)

POV: third person

MAIN THEMES: escapism/guilt/growing up/bigotry/propaganda/fear/extremism and terrorism/ etc. (to be added)

FEATURES: LGBT and POC main characters

SYNOPSIS:

Have you ever wondered if there's a version of our universe where the impossible is possible? Perhaps there's an alternate earth where the grass is orange and wet dogs smell like vanilla. Maybe there's a universe where no physical laws exist, where everything is possible. Everything we can and can't imagine could exist somewhere, or maybe it doesn't, maybe we're just getting ahead of ourselves.

Well, Noel Babel knows for a fact that the multiverse exists. They've been traveling through dimensions for quite a while and have seen quite some things, though between you and me they haven't even scratched the surface of what's 'out there'.

And you'd think "That's excellent, just think what fascinating things they must have encountered on their adventures" but if you asked Noel they would assure you that the laws of existence get down to two very simple principles:

life - existence - is unpredictable, indestructible and fascinating. No matter how impossible it seems there will always be something crawling around or hanging in the air, something living and trying its best to fulfill its purpose, whatever that may be; and

it always ends up being disappointing

After all what's the point? Nature put so much effort into humans, and look at them, they're majestic, they're fascinating.

But you can't help feeling disappointed in the human race. Becoming sentient their first impulse was to build vague, misinterpreted concepts and imaginary walls in their heads and if anyone dared to question their narrow minded impression of life they would get hit over the head with a large rock before they could even try to say "well gosh darnit this didn't work out quite the way I intended it to now did it"

It would be nice of course to imagine that this is a purely local problem, unfortunately existence disappoints (yet again and always)

So you must forgive Noel, they really aren't so pessimistic, actually they're quite the life of the party on a good day.

But they've dropped on yet another version of earth where the air is dirty, the people are uncaring and additionally there are two young adults eying them oddly, as if they were dressed in a zucchini costume.

MAIN CHARACTERS:

Noel Babel (26)- claims to be a scientist from the FOUR association doing research, yet they're lacking any sort of team. It's evident they aren't set on getting back to their dimension any time soon.

~

Oliver "Odo" Hipp (17)- a typical teenage boy. To most he will appear as one of the mass of young peole who go drinking with their friends every Friday and joke about anything remotely edgy or concerning sex. Once you get to know him you'll find he's energetic, empathetic and passionate towards life as a whole.

~

Ruth Warnink (18)- convinced that she doesn't have to make friends or share her inner thoughts and feelings with anyone if not necessary, she is seen as an emotionless asshole by most of her peers. Her principles are easy: if you don't set your hopes up you can't be disappointed. If you don't open up to anyone you can't be hurt. The only state in which she feels safe to reveal her true self is through shielding anonymity.

[Lilly (?)- TBA]

~~~~~~~

Thank you so much for reading. I will tag my old taglist in case any of you are interested but the taglist for this project is empty. If you wish to be tagged in future posts about this project, please interact with this post.

@crypticsx  @ellfewritings @clarissalopeswriter @agentorange-writes @mouwwie @writing-but-also-procrastinating @astra-the-cat

[nori-king]

21-30

21. What are your plans for this weekend? 

oh, gosh, i have no idea anymore. i know i had cooking classes on sunday, but that was cancelled just this morning, i got a text from my teacher… so i think maybe i’m going to curl up with a good book and try to forget how crazy things are getting out there.

22. Do you want to have kids? How many? 

i… would love to have kids. i’ve always wanted a big family. maybe four ? or five ? it depends how helpful my husband would be for the first two. minimum is two. but then again… i don’t think i’d let a lazy husband stop me from having more kids.

23. Do you have piercings? How many? 

i do. both of my ears, of course, but even if i have it taken it out now, i used to have a belly button piercing. i had a rebellious phase that lasted maybe a week and got my navel pierced without telling my mother. i didn’t wear it for long, but i will forever have a second, tinier belly button on top of my normal belly button, now.

24. What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 

my best subject were definitely mathematics and science. they’re such stimulating subjects and if i’m not stimulated enough, i lose my mind.

25. Do you miss anyone from your past? 

of course, i do. i miss dexter so much… every single day. i have a photograph of him by my nightstand so i see him every morning and every night. every once in a while, i’ll go see a psychic, try to make sure he’s okay up there. i miss him terribly.

26. What are you craving right now? 

a veggie pokebowl… these things are so addictive ?? whenever i eat one, i find myself either eating or crave some for the following three days. i’m currently on day two.

27. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 

not intentionally, no… well, i mean, i can’t really say i broke his heart. his heart was broken because of me… because… i’m broken, too. and that hurt him, that hurt both of us. but i didn’t break his heart in the sense you’re implying, no.

28. Have you ever been cheated on? 

i hope not…

29. Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 

yes, i have… see question 27…

30: What’s irritating you right now?

this raccoon that’s been rummaging through my garbage and spreading it in the parking lot for a week. he is very adorable but gosh darnit, he is very persistent. my neighbors and i have tried many tricks, but nothing shoos him away. i’m at a loss, right now.

70 horrible questions … Fuck it

[allislaughter]

🖊🖊🖊 for Alexabot, either three things, or one pencil for each OC you wanna talk about~

I’ll do one things for each of three different variations of Alexabot!

1. SIT Canon - Like most other characters in SIT, they have an external magical pocket installed that lets them put large objects away (to an extent) so they don’t have to carry it all the time. If you ever see a character suddenly not holding something they had on them before, they put it into said pocket. This is also why Alexabot reached behind their back to pull out the plush they won from the claw machine and where it went after they got it back :>

2. Arachnorobotics aka Spider-Bot - Their usual clothing style is like... shoes, leggings, and shorts like SIT Canon, but then the clothes they wear on the top half are shirts/tanks that are too big for them stolen from their dads’ closets and also unzipped jacket hoodies, usually for whatever thing they’re currently a fan of (such as a WALL-E hoodie because he’s a robot too!). Bonus fact: they sometimes ask their nicer villains (most of whom are secretly their family members anyway) for help with their homework as 1. a means to deflect them from doing something evil and 2. a means to get tutoring since gosh darnit, Dad, if you weren’t out being Mysterio, they wouldn’t need to be out here fighting you and then you could help them with their science homework like you promised.

3. Virusbot (my current icon) - The result of a (SIT) universe where instead of Baskerville finding them, another being did and took them in. This Alexabot accidentally got infected by an overpowering computer program that was already affected by a virus, and so the three parts together resulted in Virusbot who is very prone to glitching and destruction and universe hopping. The being that took them in is trying to catch them to cure them but so far hasn’t been successful. One day meets another Alexabot and is all “you look tasty!” to which that Alexabot says “You do too!” with the two of them having entirely different intentions (aka Virusbot meaning “i want to drain you of energy” and Alexabot meaning “your color scheme reminds me of candy).