#Edwin secretly loves it though

[feminist-dinosaur27]

In dbd world, Niko and Charles are currently decking the halls, Edwin and Crystal, on the other hand, will have an ongoing non ending migraine due to the Christmas lights (you will be hearing about it)

[artsy-waffle19]

They literally put Edwin through every possible gay-romance trope but made it realistic and that's so special to me like

we got the "probably former friend can't handle feelings and turns into bully instead" but it doesn't end with them, making up and being happy, they break apart, things escalate and they both suffer from that situation for a major part of their existence. With a bit of luck and a LOT of growing they manage to talk it out and the victim finds it in himself to forgive his bully but it's never going to be truly fine. But even though they both suffer tremendously, they are faced to deal with themselves in the process and find a kind of peace they wouldn't have gotten otherwise. Because maybe it's better to hurt for a long time only to realise that it really doesn't have to be torture to be the way you are and finally freeing yourself entirely than quietly live without the conflict but also without the realisation and resenting yourself for its entirety.

then there's the situation with the cat king. Older, emotionally unstable guy obsesses over younger inexperienced guy who actually understands him and causes some sort of gay awakening. But instead of some "I can fix him" bullshit with them, ending up happily ever after because "they're the only ones who understand each other"TM we get to see Edwin set boundaries and standing up for himself which benefits the both of them. For Edwin this ends in going "Hey thank you for opening that door to discovering that part of myself but I'm actually gonna have to leave you at the doorstep now" and for the cat king it ends up with him actually feeling seen because for once somebody didn't fall for his probably usual game of "I'm bored so I'm going to make a game of getting that guy to do what i want by seducing him". The fact that they don't end up together is the reason they were good for each other.

Also the situation with Monty which is basically the experience of a lot of queer peoples first relationship. They meet and they're both somehow new to all of this. Being queer, relationships, all that stuff. And they get along and share some interests, they like soending time with each other and technically it's like in a romance book because they meet and one of them is immediately interested and then they talk and they sit on a swingset and they kiss. And there's the excitement about "apparently I'm making my first experience with romance right now" and the worry of "I'm queer...I have it harder with relationships...what if this is the best option i have? what if it's the only one?" so they go through all the romance book tropes but the spark simply isn't there and it ends in one of them getting way more invested tha the other and they eventually end up breaking up in blood. But in a way both of them got an idea about what they actually want in life out of it so even if that sone didn't end well, it did give them something.

And last but not least the "in love with best friend who likes someone else/someone of the opposite gender specifically" but instead of having that best friend be secretly in love with the character all along or suddenly turn homophobic and the friendship being ruined they talk about it and they move on and the friendship isn't damaged and in a way it might even be better because sometimes our feelings are unrequited and sometimes that's okay.

I just really really love how the show took all of those options for cheesy and in a way sometimes even forced romance tropes and went "hey, life is not a romance novel but actually that kind of makes it better because look where it got you now"

[deconstructthesoup]

Looked at my Dead Boy Detectives swap AU, decided that it could be better, and ran with it. So... here ya go.

(For those of you who need a refresher---it's an AU where Crystal and Niko are the ghosts and Charles and Edwin are the alive ones. "Dead Girl Detectives," basically.)

Crystal is pretty much unchanged from the original concept---she died in the 1920's, she was a psychic socialite with absent parents, and she acted like the quintessential spoiled wild-child while secretly being fascinated by detective stories. She died when she got possessed by David the demon, who puppeted her body around for weeks... until she finally managed to wrench back some form of control, threw both of them off of a building, and wound up getting sent to Hell. Now that she's out and living free as a ghost, she's doing her level best to leave her old self behind and be a better person---partly for herself, but also so she can prove that she doesn't deserve eternal punishment if Hell ever comes for her again.

Niko's still an anime geek from the 1990's who was an outcast in life, but her death circumstances are different. Instead of dying from the dandelion sprites, she accepted an invitation to a party in an effort to try and socialize more after her father's death... and she got killed in a prank gone wrong, trapped in an abandoned mansion that used to belong to Crystal's family. She probably would've even moved on if it weren't for Crystal showing up and helping her out, giving Niko a reason to stick around. Niko's doing better now, but she still hasn't really processed her feelings surrounding her death. (Also, her hair's still white---she just dyed it that way, and it's never changed even after she died.)

Charles is also pretty much unchanged from the OG concept---he's still an irresponsible witch who got possessed by David and lost his memories as a result---with the added detail that he's one of many incredibly powerful magical people who David's possessed, wrecked havoc with their powers, and killed, though Charles thankfully survived the ordeal thanks to the Dead Girl Detectives. Also, I'm fairly certain that Charles is not only well aware that he's bisexual and out, but he and David were almost certainly dating. Or at least hooking up.

Edwin's still a socially awkward comics nerd and shut-in, but I decided to just have him get the paranormal parasite as a way for him to get involved with Charles and the Dead Girl Detectives---though, instead of a dandelion sprite that's all about soaking up attention, it's a hornet-themed sprite that feeds on people's insecurities and self-loathing. I think that he still butts heads with Crystal a little bit, but his bookish, studious nature winds up becoming incredibly helpful to the team, and he gets along great with Niko and Charles. Especially Charles.

Now, after thinking about it, I realized that if I was going to do a four-way swap with our main crew, it would probably make sense to do the same with our supporting cast. So:

The Night Nurse---or Minerva Knight, as I've tended to name her in my AUs---is in the place as Port Townsend's resident witch, though her motives are pretty different from Esther's. She has no need for any spells of eternal youth, having stopped aging a while ago, and she considers herself the protector of Port Townsend, keeping the forces of the supernatural at bay from the mundane residents... even if that means occasionally sacrificing a child or two to keep some of the more unsavory beings satisfied. Needless to say, Minerva has a very skewed view of morality, and unlike her canon counterpart, she can't really be swayed to change her mind. She's scary.

Esther, meanwhile, is in the lovely position as the Crow Queen, a charming and campy trickster being who exists to wear fabulous, over-the-top outfits, rule over her little feathered darlings, and to be a menace to everyone she meets. Her whole deal with Crystal isn't exactly flirtatious, but it's enough to give Crystal a gigantic bisexual awakening. And whether or not Esther's really all that interested and is just fucking with her, she's a lot of fun, and she's definitely instrumental in helping Crystal realize more about herself.

Thomas (the Cat King, but we're calling him by his first name) is Charles and Edwin's landlord---the owner of a queer bakery who's having a bit of a quarter-life crisis and is therefore a bit of an asshole to almost everyone he meets. Despite how prickly he is, though, he has an energy about him that makes him automatically endearing to every single misfit teen in a fifty-mile radius, and he's less than enthusiastic about it. Deep down, Thomas doesn't really mind, because he is a pretty lonely individual (not that he'd ever admit it).

And lastly, Jenny is the Night Guard On Duty in the Afterlife Lost & Found Department---overworked, burnt out, and thoroughly cynical when it comes to the affairs of the living. She's convinced that all she really needs is the big case that'll get her a promotion to a much less stressful position, and tracking down the Dead Girl Detectives seems to be just the thing. Of course, she's not as dedicated to her job as she appears to be, and even years of working in the most depressing place in the universe hasn't fully worn her down.

And, uh, other than the fact that I'm gonna have to figure out a stand-in for Monty... that's what I got!

[adventures-in-mangaland]

Dead Boy Detectives Fic Recs Part 6

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Sorry its been a while, last month was crazy! Not too crazy for my emotional support fandom, though! You guys are giving me life. So please have another fic rec list. :)

We two boys together clinging by Aliquis

Charles and Edwin explore their romantic and sexual hangups and also help Crystal search for Niko. This fic has everything: excellent writing, developing relationship, rituals, first time, Beltane, a hot priest. This is already a fandom classic and now I've finally read it, I can confirm it's very good! Read the rest of the series too!

The stranger the better by ghostinthelibrary

Everyone's alive and basically the supernatural version of the Men in Black. I love the whole series, but this installment has the boys' first meeting, Edwin insisting he doesn't need a new partner, office gossip and an intriguing case. The prequel also has palasaki and background catwin! Anyway, I'm obsessed with this AU.

Partridge in a Pear Tree by Vamillepudding

Cinderella AU! Charles is basically a Disney Princess and Edwin is Secretly The Prince, it's wonderful. I also loved the worldbuilding and nods to old school Cinderella lore, like the gift-giving tree. So charming, highly recommended.

Wunderkammer by dear_monday, two_ravens

Edwin and Charles (and later Crystal) are functionally immortal and running a magical museum. This fic has a fantastic sense of place (the Athenaeum is a character in its own right) and an intriguingly gothic horror vibe with its sentient exhibits, doors into other planes and unnerving nonchalance about disappearing staff and guests. I would probably die, but I would absolutely go there.

pinch me (I don't want this to be a dream) by shadowquill17

The pince-nez fic! Charles finds a pair of glasses that show him a person's desires. Then he looks at Edwin. It goes about as well as you'd expect. It was inspired by this wonderful comic by technically-human so check that out too!

Let Me Follow by LikeMmmCookies

Time loop fic! The boys get trapped in Crystal's mind, replaying the day of Charles' death. Only Edwin is the New Boy in school and he's alive... Fantastic concept, so intriguing. Plus Crystal being a badass, The Sandman crossovers and Niko!

Oaths of the Forsworn by e_va

Vampire AU! The boys meet while Charles is dying so Vampire!Edwin agrees to turn him. The story is ongoing, but so far it's been focusing on Charles coping with being a fledgling vampire. Compelling.

lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate by KiaraSayre

Edwin is in Hell. Or is he? Fabulous writing, Hell worldbuilding and gut-wrenching detail. Cw for body horror and torture.

'Cause You Cut Through All the Noise by DontOffendTheBees

Edwin doms Charles in a therapeutic and non-sexual way. That's it and it's great. I loved this for its exploration of intimacy, trust and kink.

Instructions on Being by thewritingotter

Everyone is Alive Modern AU based on an AITA post featuring Charles convincing himself he's homophobic when he realizes he hates Edwin dating other men. It sounds like a funny premise, but really brings the angst and poignancy.

in an alternate timeline's light by plentyghost

Charles finds comics!Edwin hiding in the office. Sweet.

Become So Numb by snowkatze

AU where the Night Nurse doesn't help Charles and Edwin spends another 50 years in Hell. Loved Edwin's mechanism for escape, kind-of-dark Charles and the angsty reunion.

unidentified affectionate object by lyres

Edwin is struck by a curse that manifests his feelings as random objects. Good thing Charles isn't also effected... Very cute with mild angst and a happy ending.

between you and me, suddenly something is on my mind by lolotr

Beach episode! A proper one. Just fun, friendship and emotional support. Plus Edwin in an Edwardian swimming costume, complete with a handy visual aid.

Other Types of Intimacy by Asidian

After a tough case, Edwin takes care of Orb!Charles. (Chorb? Is this chorbwin?) I guess I have a thing for non-sexual intimacy. Seriously, though, what could be more beautiful than someone cuddling your soul?

(black is the colour) of my true love's hair by ObsessedWithFandom

Charles has long hair: the fic. Interesting ghost lore with Charles' hair kind of working like his mood-ring polo and growing when he's happy. And this is an established relationship payneland fic, so lately he's been very happy. 😜 Honestly, as a child of the 80s, Charles deserves to have long hair. I need more fanart!

@ghostinthelibrarywrites @shadowquill17 @tumblerislovetumblerislife @lolotr @technically-human @dont-offend-the-bees @neurodivergent-fangirling @fishy-lava @many-gay-magpies @cordelia-noir @whatthehorsedoicallthisblog @shazziez @extremely-eager-reader @atariakana @tragedy-machine @guardianspirits13 @colourmornings @herebehunters @dearheartdont @avoiceofnerat @littlepocketuniverse @overlord-of-chaos @fairandfatalasfair @handwrittenhello @every-moment-a-different-sound

I've added some tags for people who left fun tags/comments on previous lists. Let me know if you'd like me to add you on the next one. :)

[edwinspaynes]

DBDA Halloween headcanons?

Thank you for sending me this yesterday!!!

So I think the boys would view Halloween in fundamentally opposite ways. On his first Halloween as a ghost, Charles would want to have ironic fun with it. He's like, "let's go rattle the chains at Old Bailey."

Edwin, on the other hand, dreads Halloween. He hates the decorations meant to be creepy, hates the scuttling sounds that those machines in the store (and on some doorsteps during the season) make, and hates costumes that remind him of demons. Everything about Halloween is simultaneously jarring, terrifying, and mortifying for him.

---

Charles finds this out on their first Halloween together. They go out to perform good-spirited hauntings (Edwin makes the excuse that he can't let Charles go alone) but Edwin starts to be visibly anxious and nervous. He freaks out about a lawn decoration, doesn't show fear outright but is visibly uncomfortable and also irritable.

Charles suggests that they go back home because "it looks like it's going to rain" (the sky is clear), and Edwin is secretly grateful.

---

The next year, they agree to watch a horror movie. Charles is such a fan of Halloween that Edwin agrees to it, thinking it a good compromise. They don't think he'll be triggered.

He is. This time, they know each other a bit better. Edwin tells Charles they remind him of Hell. They turn off the movie.

Charles says, "I know a Halloween movie we can watch, it's one that I loved when I was alive."

Edwin, who still finds the TV an odd, new, and curious technology loves this. The man was mesmerized by neon lights - he would love the vibrant colours of a cartoon.

Now, every year, the boys' Halloween tradition is to watch the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown.

---

When Crystal and Niko join the Agency, Edwin shares that they watch the Great Pumpkin for Halloween every year. Obviously, Crystal and Niko are now included in this tradition. This goes on for years.

---

One year, Edwin confides that he wishes he could watch other Halloween movies, even though he loves the Great Pumpkin. But he can't, because it still sets him the fuck off.

Niko decides that they're going to have a triple feature that Halloween. She doesn't awkwardly ask about Edwin's triggers - she knows them because it's been a while, they're close, and she's observant. And she goes through like 100 Halloween movies to find a couple - a rare couple - that contain none of his triggers.

She tells him this privately, careful not to use the word 'trigger' because Edwin is clearly trying to hide this fact. He is appreciative.

She makes some excuse to watch them before the Great Pumpkin, and Crystal and Charles agree.

---

All three of those movies are tradition, now.

[witsserviceablesubstitute]

I've not encountered Crystal hate, but I do see a lot about Crystal hate... which would be a staggering double standard. So much love for Edwin, flaws and all, when they're the same to me. Crystal's a top tier character. All obstinate pride, high walls, and secretly soft heart (you know, like Edwin). She goes on a hero's journey that mirrors Edwin's hero's journey— foisted into an adventure (Crystal by two dead boys/ Edwin by one sad psychic girl), faced the climax of their season long emotional crisis (bury abusive relationship in mind/ confess gay love in hell) and they reach the end of their story permanently transformed by the journey. (Who else thinks there'll be steep consequences for the mind burial and hell confession in s2?)

I really empathize with Charles. He has excellent taste, and because of their spikes and sass, not in spite of. Mostly, though, I feel like the first people who'd be furious at Crystal hate would be two dead boys. Fighting back with a sharp tongue and blunt bat.

[blakenation1]

Charles is the friend that will “propose” to any of his other friends to get free dessert or something at restaurants. Edwin is so over it (but secretly loves the desserts like the dessert man he is).

Sometimes Edwin is very over it though:

Charles: “Edwin… Will you marry me?” *on one knee*

Edwin: “Stop being so foolish, would you? GET UP.”

[dumb-zombie-girl]

This is chase he's my dbda shapeshifter oc who's secretly in love with cat King

Name: Chase

Species: shapeshifter ( he mostly likes to shapeshift into any animal)

s/o: none but he is crushing on cat king

Age:21

Birthday: 10/22/2002

Personality: crazy, chill, annoying, lazy, bitchy, kind

Friends: jenny ( she'll deny it), crystal,Niko,Monty, Charles, Edwin

Enemies: Esther

Random fact about chase: for some reason animals love to follow him around whether it's cats,dogs, Birds,mouse,even a random goat will follow him around ( the goat's name is Bonnie and the mouse's name is cheese)

"WHY DO RANDOM FUCKING CATS KEEP FOLLOWING ME"-chase

"i know what it's like to want someone you can't have"-chase to Edwin

Random headcanons/small images

Sometimes chase will shapeshift into a cat and play with the other cat's in the warehouse

Whenever he's a cat his scratch still hurts ghosts even though he's not an actual cat

He has adhd ( all of my oc's have adhd because i have Adhd)

Sometimes whenever him and Thomas ( cat King) are bored they'll shift into their cat forms and chase each other around

Backstory: chase moved to Port Townsend's when he was 19 after he caught his boyfriend at the time cheating on him he got him a job at a little music shop that was hiring and he's been living there for two years

[thenightling]

Who are the Dead Boy Detectives?

This has been asked a lot lately because there is a new show coming to Netflix (originally it was going to be on HBO Max). 

Who are The Dead Boy Detectives?

First we have Edwin Paine.  Edwin was roughly twelve or thirteen-years-old and blond haired.  Edwin was murdered some one hundred years ago in a boarding school in England. He had been killed by some older bullies who were wanna-be Satanists.  The bullies tried to offer up Edwin for demonic favors. The bullies died for their own various life-related reasons very shortly after murdering Edwin (it was close to the first World War) and the bullies went to Hell because they believed in Hell and felt that is what they deserved. In DC comics lore you only go to Hell if you believe in it, and believe you deserve it. That part of the lore can be problematic as it condemns people who have been brainwashed by abusers that they deserve to be tortured.  And it also can exonerate sociopaths who genuinely don’t think they did anything wrong. Currently The Sandman Netflix series has not addressed the old comic lore that you have to believe you deserve Hell to go there but it has acknowledged that you have to believe IN Hell in order to be able to go there. Edwin, though an innocent, spent a century trapped in a strange corridor where he thought something was following him.  He believed he was in Hell but according to another comic he ended up in this place via a “clerical error.” In The Sandman storyline called The Sandman: Season of Mists Lucifer quits ruling Hell and shuts the place down.  (Basis for the Lucifer TV Series.) When Lucifer shut Hell down all the demons were left to their own devices and all the souls that had been trapped in Hell returned to Earth. This is where poor Charles Rowland comes in. Charles was a dark haired living boy of about twelve or thirteen-years-old. In the 1990s Charles was attending the same boarding school that Edwin had died in.  The ghosts of the bullies returned to the school after Hell was shut down and looking for someone to torment they went after poor Charles and badly burnt his back with a hot stove. Edwin (who was also haunting the old school) tried to help Charles but Charles was dying from his injuries so all Edwin could do was stay with him and try to comfort him as he died up in the attic of the school, not far from where Edwin, himself, had been murdered. Death herself showed up to take Charles but Charles didn’t want to leave his friend, Edwin.   Death was very busy that day with demons and evil souls wandering the Earth and the evil souls killing people so she allowed Charles to stay with Edwin, implying she may come back for them later. The boy ghosts left the school after that and in their own comic book formed a detective agency to solve supernatural themed crimes together. Being naïve children they figured reading a few kid detective stories was enough education for this.  They were wrong.  Edwin Paine and Charles Rowland first appeared in The Sandman: Season of Mists: Chapter 4. Issue 25 of The Sandman comics. They were created by Neil Gaiman for The Sandman: Season of Mists.         The ghost boys later appeared in their own comic book called The Dead Boy Detectives. The Dead Boy Detectives (characters) appeared on TV in the HBO Max series Doom Patrol.  In Doom Patrol the boys ages were bumped to late teens so that Edwin could be portrayed as secretly being in love with Charles.   Doom Patrol also changed Charles’ cause of death so that he died of hypothermia when bullies forced him into a freezing lake. On Doom Patrol one of the boys was played by Ty Tennant, the son of David Tennant. David Tennant was Loki in The Sandman audio drama and was in episode 11 of The Sandman Netflix series in the story Dream of a Thousand Cats.  David Tennant was also Crowley in the show Good Omens (also based on a Neil Gaiman novel, this one that he co-wrote with the late Terry Pratchett). The version of The Dead Boy Detectives who appeared in Doom Patrol were given a spin-off series of their own for HBO Max but it was to star another new set of actors playing the roles of the teen ghosts.  Due to internal shake ups at Warner Brothers, The Dead Boy Detectives series never made it to air on HBO Max and will, instead, premiere on Netflix, which may allow it to connect more directly to The Sandman like it’s original literary incarnation.        

[mymbios]

Edwin Drake, the 34-year-old heir to the Dukedom of Hargrave, hails from a long line of aristocratic English nobility. Born in 1760, during the Georgian period, Edwin grew up amidst the grand estates, lavish balls, and intricate politics of the British elite. He is the eldest son of Duke Reginald Drake (58) and Duchess Eleanor Drake (56), and he has two younger siblings—Lady Beatrice Drake (31), who married into another powerful noble family, and Lord Henry Drake (27), who serves as an officer in the British Army.

From an early age, Edwin’s future as the Duke was laid out for him with the weight of responsibility, but Edwin, a natural charmer with an irresistible swagger, was not one to take life too seriously. His father, a stern and duty-bound man, always reminded Edwin of his obligations to the family name, but young Edwin spent his boyhood dreaming of adventure rather than governance. His mother, the more indulgent of his parents, adored Edwin’s rakish nature and secretly supported his wild streak, seeing much of herself in her eldest son.

Edwin was raised at Hargrave Hall, a grand estate with sprawling gardens, where he learned the ways of the aristocracy—horse riding, fencing, and hunting—under the watchful eyes of tutors and his father. But while other boys were dutiful and obedient, Edwin rebelled, craving the excitement of London over the quiet duties of country life. By the time he was a young man, he had cultivated a reputation as a playboy in the city, frequenting the exclusive gentlemen's clubs, the theaters, and the gambling houses of Mayfair. He thrived in social settings, where his quick wit, good looks, and noble title made him a favorite among the ton. Women adored him, men envied him, and few could resist his charm.

However, beneath his frivolous, carefree exterior, Edwin is a complex character. His childhood, spent under the shadow of his father’s heavy expectations, shaped him in ways even he does not fully recognize. His need for approval, coupled with his desire to forge his own path, created a restlessness in him. As much as he enjoys his wild lifestyle, there are moments when Edwin feels the burden of his future looming large over him. He knows that one day he will become the Duke, and with that title comes responsibilities he cannot shirk forever.

Edwin is known for his hobbies that include fencing, gambling, and horse racing, and he is a frequent spectator at boxing matches, a brutal sport popular among Georgian aristocrats.

Although he is seen as a playboy who cares little for anything beyond the latest scandal or affair, Edwin is deeply intelligent. He has a knack for political strategy—though he pretends not to care about politics, he has often used his charm to influence decisions in the House of Lords. His quick mind and persuasive nature will undoubtedly make him a formidable duke when the time comes.

Despite his rakish tendencies, Edwin has a strong bond with his family, particularly his sister, Lady Beatrice. The two grew up close, and she remains one of the few people who can see through his charm and bravado to the man underneath. His relationship with his younger brother, Lord Henry, is more strained, as Henry is everything Edwin is not—serious, dutiful, and loyal to the family name.

Edwin’s personality is that of a man who knows his worth. He is confident, flirtatious, and magnetic, easily drawing people into his orbit. He can be vain, reckless, and selfish, but underneath it all, there’s a hidden depth, a man who grapples with his destiny and his own expectations. He loves the thrill of the chase, whether it’s women, power, or adventure, but he fears the day when the chase will have to end, and duty will come calling.

As he nears his mid-thirties, Edwin remains the talk of London, the handsome duke-in-waiting who refuses to settle down. He is well aware that the clock is ticking—his father grows older, and the responsibilities of the Dukedom loom large on the horizon. For now, though, Edwin enjoys his position, savoring the freedom he has before the inevitable weight of the title falls on his shoulders.

[pennyrunner]

And part 2 of NSFW Yan preferences!

Again, nothing too wild or in detail. Mentions of blood play, so mild blood TW?

NSFW under cut!

Audrey:

-Pure domme

-Firm, not overly gentle but usually not super harsh(unless you ask...or deserve it)

-Likes bondage

-Sugar mama(please let her dress you up in what she buys you)

-Loves lingerie

-*cough*mommykink*cough*

-Praising

-Likes both princesses and brats

-Degradation or pampering depending on your behavior

Elliott:

-Switch, whatever his partner wants to do

-Needy as a sub, gentle as a dom

-Open-minded and likes to experiment

-Doesn't like to do anything too mean or degrading though

-Doesn't want you to hate him

-Hesitant, but if you assure him you'd like it, will give it a go

-Would probably enjoy spanking more than he'd think

-Likes getting tied up, but please don't treat him too roughly!

-Also, cosplay

Elias:

-More dom-leaning than his brother, but still a switch for the right person...

-Likes submissive people in bed

-Enjoys bondage and light degradation

-Cute outfits or fancy dresses/suits get him going

-Or adorably embarassing outfits(super frilly, lacey, etc.)

-Likes thigh-highs and stockings

-Teasing

-Likes toys

-Nippleplay

-Secretly enjoys being bratted...and getting dommed

Anton:

-Dom, despite his more sheepish attitude

-Guy flips a switch when you're alone

-He'll let you push him around outside the bedroom, but in there he's the boss

-Gentle dom, though he can get carried away

-Size kink

-Loves pleasing his partner and is very good with his hands and mouth

-Will do pretty much anything you want him to with a few exceptions

-Begging, both ways

-Loves his partners voice, wants to make you moan for him~

-Also...hair. Will not elaborate right now lol

Edwin:

-Dom

-Prefers submissive partners, but likes to work for it

-Openly enjoys brats and putting them in their place

-Can be firm, usually not overly rough

-Medical/science play?

-Glove kink

-Likes to "examine" you

-Fake sympathy!!

-Overstimulation

-Likes drool and tears

-Obligatory daddy kink

Morrison:

-Dom, likes subs

-Surprisingly rough and scary

-Very demeaning/sarcastically sympathetic

-Likes being in charge

-Pretty selfish lover, though he does enjoy giving you pleasure, too

-Medical play and restraints

-Loves syringes and taking your blood

-Light pain play/impact play

-Pet names!!

Ottolie:

-Switch, though she prefers being submissive or power bottoming

-Big sadomasochist, loves being pushed around or bullying her lover

-Just wants to do whatever she can to please her partner

-Likes cosplay and lingerie

-Also likes praise and degradation equally

-Painplay

-Tries anything once

[filmmakerdreamst]

your top 5 dasey episodes?💕

1. Home Movies

OK. Their fight at the beginning screams UST (and also kickstarts the episode)

Casey is trying to interview Derek about the family and he surprisingly gets really pissed at her. They fight alot in this show, but this is the first time he legitimately shouts at her while being dead serious/visably hurts her feelings and vice versa.

He's clearly mad that she left him out of something that deeply effects him. Hes never been good at expressing feelings which leads to him bottling them up and letting them out in an unhealthly way (sometimes I feel this dude needs more therpy than Casey). Even though, he likes his new step-family, he still had no say in the matter at the end of the day e.g. This is not a picture perfect family Casey, this is a mess of a family thats making the best of a contrived situation.

And its very obvious to me, that he clearly loves her by this point, and he resents the fact that he does. e.g. 'My Dads decisions put me in this mess'

It gave me a slight reminder of 'Flowers in the Attic' (even though thats a totally different kettle of fish) where the two eldest siblings fall in love with eachother because of the situation they are forced under by their parents (i.e. emotional neglect etc)

And the ending scene where they playfight over a video of Derek filming her brushing her teeth, is like my favourite moment between them ever. Its so cute and touchy feely and full of love. I tell you, in another situation, this would end in sex. (not even sorry right now)

2. Adios Derek

This could be my top favourite (if it wasn't for 'Home Movies') because it just shows how much Derek is obssessed with his step-sister, to the point that hes told hes going to be sent away to another continent.

The thing he pranks Casey about is strangely specific. Hes just found out she keeps a poetry column. He hacks her computer, and changes the poem she writes - to a limmick that he wrote. I dono - its just a little weird if he doesn't have feelings for her.

Also possibly my favourite moment is at the end of the episode, where he gives her an advanced copy of the school paper (without being asked) where he had her real poem published, along side funny poetry that he wrote about her. Thats peak romance for me.

3. Things that Go Bump in the Night

This episode is such a choatic mess OMG. The way Casey is eager to impress Derek by sneaking out with him. Their married bicker in the car -- which leads to them denting the other car. Them acting like 'a couple' who might get found out by the rest of the family. I love every bit of it. I've said this before but its almost like a G rated version of them going on a date secretly and the family finding out.

4. March Break

Very Obvious Choice. But come on. Why did George and Nora leave them alone together?

I just think its funny how this episode has a contrast of the family road trip vs Derek and Casey at home, circling each other, reinacting 'Creul Intentions'.

It just shows how the show genre is split in half. There's the family-friendly comedy of George and Nora and Lizzie, Edwin and Marti. And theres the whatevers going on with Derek and Casey. They are an genre in itself (heh heh)

5. Dinner Guest

I love this episode for the primal reason that he calls Casey's Dad back after seeing Casey upset. I feel this is one of those pivotal moments in their relationship. And he's not even there when Casey's Dad comes back, which means he didn't even want the credit. He just wanted to see her happy. Great character development for Derek.

[mimisempai]

 I don’t want to hide what you mean to me

Summary

During Hob's first visit to The Dreaming, provoked by Matthew with the help of Lucienne, Dream reveals the depth of his feelings for him.

Notes:

I have no idea if this is possible, so if not, imagine it's Hob's dream, but I love the possibility of them all interacting together. I hope you’ll enjoy it !

On Ao3

Rating T - 1216 words

"Boss, if you could take your eyes off your human for a moment and listen to what I have to say."

Dream turned his head to the raven on his shoulder, looking perfectly innocent, though inwardly annoyed because he knew exactly what Matthew was referring to.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, you chatty bird!"

Matthew croaked and didn't respond, as the answer was obvious from his perspective.

This was the first time Hob had ever set foot in the Dreaming and from the moment he had set foot in the library, Dream had lost him.

He was currently chatting with Lucienne in an animated way under Dream's gaze, secretly happy to see him becoming part of his world in this way.

This gossiping raven had been totally right, he was fascinated by his human.

Hob walked towards them under Lucienne's amused gaze and once in front of them, he said: "This is so exciting! All these books that are not finished in reality but dreamed by their authors. Lucienne told me that over there was the finished version of Dickens' The Mystery of Edwin Drood, so I'll just take a look at it and come back." 

He brushed Dream's shoulder with his hand as he passed and Dream followed him with his eyes, also with an amused look. Although he was fully aware that another scrutinizing look was staring at him, he tried to ignore it completely. 

But that was without counting on the sharp tongue of this bird of ill omen.

"Boss, if I may say so, you are literally drooling."

Reflexively, Dream wiped his mouth and then realizing he had just been fooled, he turned his head to Matthew and scolded him, "Matthew, if you keep this up, I promise you'll end up in the catalog of the most beautiful stuffed animals!"

Matthew had another little sarcastic croak before replying, "If I may, I'd like to ask you a question, one that intrigues me. What is it about a poor human like this that fascinates you so much?"

Dream, that the idea of stuffing Matthew attracted more and more, tried to control himself to answer him. But, offended on Hob's behalf, he couldn't help but answer in a passionate tone, a vindictive gleam in his eyes, "Hob is simply beyond belief! And you, as a former human, should realize that. He has accepted and continues to accept what life throws at him, he has probably experienced more lows than highs and yet he has never given up. He has incredible faith in life and even when it sends him things that would be unbearable for anyone else, when he could have the choice to stop everything, he has this incredible faith and hope that life still has so much to offer him."

He was interrupted by a small laugh, this time from Lucienne. When he looked at her, he saw that she winked at Matthew who flew off Dream's shoulder.

Dream looked at them in turn with a suspicious expression, "Hmph! Don't tell me that..."

Lucienne looked at him with a knowing smile before replying, "Let's just say it's nice to see when you're honest with your feelings, Sir but..." her face turned serious again as she continued, "If I may, don't forget that he's not perfect either, don't put him on a pedestal. It wouldn't be good for either you or him."

Dream appreciated Lucienne's concern. He deeply respected her judgment and she was probably one of the people who knew him best, even if he would never tell her.

He replied in the same serious tone, determined to convince her, "Oh, I know he's not perfect, I've witnessed his bad, sometimes very bad choices, but I've also witnessed everything he's done to become better and to fix his mistakes as best he could. I know that some choices still haunt him now. But he is genuine to the core, at least with me, because he is not afraid to show me his imperfections. Everything, his failures, his mistakes, his fears, his demons, he showed me without me having to search or enter his mind.  In fact, he is perfectly imperfect. Perfect for me in that sense."

Lucienne nodded before replying, "Thank you for your honesty, sir and forgive me if I overstepped my bounds."

Dream shook his head and said softly, "No, you don't have to apologize, thank you for caring about me and him. It took me a long time to realize it and I'm sorry, but I know now that you care. Thank you again."

At Matthew's caw, he looked up at the raven and called out, "You too, cheeky bird!"

Lucienne chuckled and said softly, "The Lord of Dreams has a heart and he's showing it, that would make a great book title for this library."

Dream shrugged because he knew it wasn't worth protesting, and for once, he didn't feel like it either.

But he said with a slight smile on his lips, "It's like that, it brings out the best in me." He paused and added with a falsely threatening look, "If you tell anyone I said that, I will deny it."

Lucienne smiled and replied with a mischievous tone, "I'll take it to my grave."

Turning to resume her work, she added, "I'm happy for you, sir Really." 

They nodded in mutual appreciation, then Lucienne walked away to the back of the library, followed by Matthew hovering over her as Dream followed them with his eyes.

"So... I'm not perfect?"

Two hands came to rest on his shoulders and slid down his chest.

"Hob!" Dream froze slightly, "Don't tell me you've..."

"...Heard everything?" completed Hob before answering himself, "Yes, I heard everything perfectly, from 'amazing' to 'perfect for you', I don't think I missed anything."

Dream couldn't see it, but he could hear in his voice that Hob was smiling.

"All right..." Dream couldn't help but blush slightly, he had gotten carried away defending Hob and didn't remember everything he had said, but enough to be a little embarrassed.

Hob kissed him on the neck and whispered, "Don't be embarrassed, it's kind of nice to hear you compliment me, although Matthew will be quick to tell Mervyn who will tell everyone and in a not at all subtle way. Everyone here is going to know that the Lord of Dreams is a softee, are you aware of that?"

Dream grunted as he imagined the gossip.

Then he turned into Hob's arms and saw that he was looking at him and smiling affectionately.

Hobs whispered, "Hi handsome..." then he raised his hand to brush Dream's cheek with his knuckles and continued, "Anyway, thank you for sticking up for me so fiercely."

Dream took his hand in his and replied softly, "I meant everything I said. Each word." 

Hob was too close to hide the embarrassment but also the pleasure his lover's praise had given him so Dream leaned in and gently pressed his lips to Hob's in a long, deep kiss. 

Before he let himself be carried away by the sweet passion of the moment, Dream told himself that he didn't care if his entire kingdom thought he was a sap, if it was to have Hob look at him like that every time.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  ��

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Dreamling Masterlist here

[boldlyvoid]

Spy Kids

400 Follower Celebration Fic #3 for @meganskane

fic #1 | fic #2

Summary: Spencer and Y/N's kids think that they are secretly spies and request a mission story before bed.

warnings: bomb threat, mentions of euthanasia, Cat Adams, general fluffiness

word count: 900

From the time they were 5, the kids had told everyone that their parents were spies… and no matter how much Spencer and Y/N told them they weren’t, and even if they were it would blow their cover… the kids still firmly believed that they were secret government spies.

Why else did they leave in the middle of the night with guns and bags to sit in a special airplane and run around the country catching bad guys? It was a nicer way of thinking about the terrible things that go on in their actual job, so they indulged them.

Twins weren’t easy but it was the best thing that happened to them. Juniper and Edwin are the best little kids they could ever ask for, one boy and one girl and two incredible personalities. They were a team, sometimes in the worst ways possible, always getting in trouble and never turning on one another.

They enjoyed sharing a room still, they had beds side by side and enough room for mom and dad to crawl in beside them for storytime. Junie was cuddled with her father while Eddie was laying on his mom’s chest as she ran her fingers through his hair. He’s always been a momma’s boy, much like Spencer.

“Can you tell us a spy story tonight?” Junie asked.

Y/N sighed with a small laugh, “why don’t we tell you about the evil Cat that almost crashed our wedding?”

“We can’t tell them that one,” Spencer interjects, “it’s not that funny or happy.”

“Well, you get married at the end right?” Junie asks, “so then it is a happy ending.”

“So there,” Edwin teases with a tongue out, “now you have to tell us.”

“Fine, does Mom want to do the honours?” Spencer asks, seeing where on earth she could take this story.

“You know how weddings work right? Your dad was waiting for me at the end of the aisle and grandpa was just about to walk me down, and this human-cat hybrid woman shows up out of nowhere,” Y/N is over-enthusiastic and the kids get riled up as a result.

“She’s parachuting out of the sky and your dad looks at me like oh no it’s the assassin from my missions before I met you!” She gasps.

“She was evil, she put me in jail and she hurt me, and I was so scared of her hurting your mom too,” Spencer adds with a sad tone, he hated how much Cat tried to ruin his life.

“But your mom is really cool, and I was able to kick her butt even with my dress on! And then we cuffed her up and sent her away, but she knew we’d get her so she had a fake cop come and get her and then just bring her back and she tried to blow up the party!”

Spencer hated remembering it, but it was a wild story, one worth sharing. “Your dad and I had to solve a bunch of clues to get the count down to stop and we did just in time!”

“What happened to the cat?” Junie asked.

“She, unfortunately, went to sleep and didn’t wake up one day,” Spencer glares at Y/N, this was the reason he didn’t want to say anything to the kids about it.

“She’s in hell,” Edwin whispered.

“What?” Y/N laughed, holding him closer, “where did you learn that?”

“Henry told us that Jack's mom is in heaven and the guy who killed her is in hell, that’s where all the bad guys go,” Junie explained on her brother’s behalf, pushing the blame off onto someone else, like always.

“But, at the end of the day your mom and I got to celebrate being in love with each other through everything… even if that means assassin cat’s and parachutes on what is supposed to be the best day of our lives,” Spencer smiled as he pulled Juniper in closer.

“Wrong,” she whispered, “the best day was when I was born.”

“And me.” Edwin added, “just cause you came out first doesn’t make it just your day.”

“I’m pretty sure it does,” she teases right back, sticking their tongues out at each other.

“You two are too much,” Spencer laughed.

“Not too much though, you should have more,” Junie was soft in her request, “I think it would be cool to have another sibling.”

“Yeah!” Edwin agreed, “another boy!”

“We can name him…” Junie took a moment to think, “Patrick… yeah.”

“Why?” Y/N and Spencer laughed and asked at the same time, making eye contact from across the room as they did so. Their kids were the weirdest…

“Junie, Eddie and Patty,” Juniper said it like it all made sense the first time and they should have gotten it then… she was too sassy for being 7.

“It’s settled,” Y/N agreed. “Go to bed so we can discuss how we can have 3 kids and still be spies.”

“So you admit it then?” Junie smirked as she won.

“We’re spies,” Spencer agreed, kissing the top of her head before crawling out of her bed. “Now go to sleep.”

They traded kids and exchanged good night hugs, sending them off to bed with an I love you and a blown kiss from the door, they were the best spy kids in the whole world.

taglist:

@g0lden-cth @doctorspenceryeet @samuel-de-champagne-problems @reiding-recs @ssavanessa22 @spookyspence @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria@reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @jswessie187 @k-k0129 @calm-and-doctor @blanchardsbk

[thekisforkeats]

Love Languages

Info: The Magnus Archives, JonMartin, rated T probably for swears. Canon-Compliant. Set post-MAG 22, with a coda post-MAG 159. Everyone is ND and everyone is trans because that’s just how my personal S1 Archives gang rolls.

CWs: Mentions of ableism and Martin’s mother. I’d say canon-typical worms but the worms don’t really come up except in passing.

I do not know anything about BSL, so I did not try to describe the signs.

Summary: A love language is not just about how you best show love and affection; it is also about the ways you best receive love and affection. And so, for someone like Martin, who shows love by going out of his way to help others, someone going out of their way to help him, well. What better way for him to realize just how loved he is?

--------------------------------------------

The first time Martin went completely non-verbal after starting work in the Archives, it was the morning after giving Jon the statement about Jane Prentiss.

It wasn’t a surprising development, really. Martin didn’t go fully non-verbal that often, but when he did it was almost always a thing that started in the morning and lasted most of the day. Sometimes it wore off by the time he went to bed, sometimes it lasted until the next morning.

After his mother’s diagnosis, he’d been unable to speak for an entire week. That hadn’t gone over well--as much as his mother wanted him to be quiet, she didn’t like the “silent treatment,” as she called it.

Martin hated that she’d called it that, as though his non-verbal episodes were anything he did on purpose. Some days talking just felt like a chore; those days he could get by only forcing words out when he had to. But some days, the worst days, he just couldn’t talk. He could understand other people just fine, he could make noises, sometimes he could even hum. And he could definitely read and write. But speaking words, aloud? No. He could not speak, on these days, however much he may have wanted to.

As Martin grew older and learned more about himself, he learned words and reasons and coping mechanisms. He realized that some of the problem came from dysphoria and the longer he was on hormones the less often it happened. He realized that he was autistic (even if he never got diagnosed), and learned how to handle the episodes that still occurred. He took sign languages classes because it was a good and useful thing to know regardless, to be able to communicate with more people.

As many Deaf people had learned before Martin, he’d found himself in plenty of situations when nobody around him knew BSL, so he’d found a phone app that let him type out things he wanted to say and repeated them in a tinny, mechanical voice. Feminine, but he found it didn’t cause dysphoria; it wasn’t his voice. It was the app speaking for him, a robot lady translating his words.

Martin was fairly certain he was going to need the robot lady to speak for him today, and he was dreading the whole idea. The app got him a range of reactions from scorn to derision to faux sympathy. The last time he’d done so at work, the Institute library staff had regarded him with such pity that he’d called in sick the two other times it had happened since.

He’d woken early, because he was always awake fairly early, to ensure he looked presentable and got to work on time. He did not want Jonathan “Crisply Professional At All Times” Sims giving him that look again. The particular look that was “I highly disapprove of your sartorial choices but I’m not going to get into it right now because I have so very much else to do. Nonetheless, if I could fire you for what you’re wearing I would.”

Jon had a lot of looks. Martin fervently wished he could stop categorizing them; he very much disliked his boss, and very much wanted to stop thinking about Jon quite as much as he did.

Jon was attractive, that much Martin had noticed the first day he’d come in, with a jawline Martin would’ve loved to trace with his fingers, eyes sharp and deep and intelligent, salt-and-pepper hair that Martin would have tangled his fingers in gladly.

Except, of course, that Jon was also a prick who didn’t like Martin one bit and made that very clear. He’d put down on record that he thought Martin would “contribute nothing but delays.” Martin was not such a sucker for punishment that he would put up with someone who hated him just for a pretty face. The tiny potential blossom of a crush had been, well, crushed five seconds after it had poked its head above ground, by Jon’s declaration that he could dismiss Martin if he didn’t resolve the “dog situation” immediately.

Martin counted his lucky stars every day that Jon had not, in fact, dismissed him, despite having had to deal with a doggy mess. The luck was really in having Tim around, Martin figured; Jon actually seemed fond of Tim, and the other man had managed to smooth the entire situation over.

Martin had fallen asleep last night thinking about the new look Jon had given him yesterday: concerned. Truly, genuinely concerned, which had rather taken Martin aback. He’d been certain Jon wouldn’t believe him, would scoff and roll his eyes at the entire statement, and instead he’d just looked… concerned. 

And then Jon had offered Martin the cot that he’d woken up in this morning.

It wasn’t the look of concern that had Martin non-verbal, though; of that he was certain. It was the stress of the last two weeks, and dumping out the statement yesterday, and all the whirl of figuring out how to live in the Archives. Jon’s insistence on going with him to pick up basics with a toothbrush at the convenience store, and then coming back to be sure he was okay. Jon finding clean sheets and discussing how he’d do his laundry. Jon had expensed clothing bought online to the Institute, including next-day shipping, because he’d “lost access to his flat and thus his wardrobe in the line of duty.” It had all been bewildering and overwhelming and it was no real surprise that Martin was in the state he found himself when he woke.

Martin had known as soon as he’d opened his eyes. It was just there, the feeling of nope can’t talk today. He’d pulled on his binder and the same clothing he’d worn the day before and then fumbled around for his phone. Which… he didn’t have. The damn worm-hive-lady had stolen it from him. Well, shit.

He managed to avoid having to figure out how to talk while he went out to get breakfast, just pointing at a scone in the display and smiling at the guy behind the counter as if he wasn’t secretly irritated by the price of everything in Chelsea. By the time Martin got back, Jon was already in his office, so thank God he’d avoided that awkward interaction. He went to make himself tea, and had his breakfast in the breakroom, and brushed his teeth, and then went to get started on…

Wait. He didn’t even know what they were working on right now.

Well, he wasn’t going to bother Jon about it; however nice he’d been last night it surely must have worn off by now, and Martin had no interest in summoning one of his boss’ looks this early in the morning. Normally he’d still be on his commute at this hour.

After a moment’s thought, he went to go see what they’d recorded in his absence, and soon had a stack of statements on his desk. They’d gotten through five statements in the two weeks he’d been gone. Maybe Jon was right. Maybe Martin did contribute “nothing but delays.”

Pushing the thought aside, Martin focused on listening to the tapes, and was just finishing up listening to the second half of Father Edwin Burroughs’ statement when Tim came into the shared office the assistants used.

“Hey, you’re in early. You get the email?”

Martin raised his eyebrows and shook his head.

Tim snorted. “Jon claims he’s got something to warn us about, something that ‘won’t parse properly through digital means.’” He rolled his eyes. “Which is Jon-speak for ‘it’s a weird thing and I don’t want to admit it’s a weird thing because I have to keep my skeptic hat on to preserve my self-image.”

Martin chuckled in solidarity, then gestured toward the door to Jon’s office, to indicate that’s where their boss was.

“Not coming?” Tim asked, his own eyebrow raised. When Martin shrugged, he said, “Well, I guess if you didn’t get the email…” Tim also shrugged, then said, “Guess I’d better get it over with. Wish me luck!”

Martin gave him a thumbs up.

When Sasha came in, Martin silently directed her to Jon’s office as well, then heaved a sigh of relief. He hadn’t had to explain being non-verbal at all yet, and it was already nine o’clock. Maybe if he was lucky, Jon would warn them off talking to him and he’d manage to make it the entire day without having to explain the whole “non-verbal” business to anyone he saw on a regular basis.

Alas, it was barely thirty minutes later that Tim and Sasha returned to talk to him, both wearing expressions of mingled concern and guilt. When they spoke it was a flood of the usual, expected platitudes:

“We’re so sorry!”

“We didn’t know!”

“Are you okay??”

And such like.

Martin shrugged and nodded and shook his head in all the right places, and evidently Jon had played them the tape of his statement so he didn’t have to explain it all again (thank God), and he thought maybe, maybe he could even figure out what statement they were working on right now if he just listened to their chatter after they were done with the niceties, but then…

Well. Then Timothy Stoker happened.

Which is to say, Tim actually looked at Martin, and said, “You’re being awfully quiet. You sure you’re okay?”

And then he and Sasha just… sat there, looking at him expectantly.

Martin sighed and reached for a piece of scrap paper and wrote, I’m autistic and sometimes I go non-verbal. Today’s one of those days, but I don’t have my phone anymore, so no communication app.

As he held up the paper so the others could read the words, Martin braced himself for the ensuing reactions. Pity, probably, like those in the Institute library, and he couldn’t even call in sick to avoid it; he’d rather have scorn and derision. At least those reactions were honest.

What he got from them was not pity, however, nor even scorn.

Sasha hummed. “Autism explains a lot, actually. Don’t worry, it’s not a problem.”

Tim grinned and clapped Martin on the shoulder. “Yeah, why didn’t you just say so? It’s fine, you’ve been through an ordeal. And so you know--you’re hardly the only neurodivergent in the Archives.”

Martin blinked at Tim, then wrote: Wait, what? Who…?

“Would you believe me if I said all of us?” Tim said with a grin. “I have ADD, Jon’s… well… he’s Jon, and as for Sasha…”

Sasha sighed in fond exasperation and cut in, “Tim…”

“I contend that you cannot be neurotypical, Ms. James. You fit in too well around here.”

“I am not admitting to anything on Institute property,” Sasha said with aplomb. “And you shouldn't have either, but here we are.” She looked at Martin. “If HR finds out and they give you any trouble, let us know and we’ll figure out what to do.”

Tim, in the meanwhile, pulled out his phone. “Here, go ahead and use mine for now, until your replacement gets here or whatever. What’s the app so I can install it for you?”

Martin’s jaw had dropped open. Tim having ADD made sense; what did he mean about Jon, though? And Sasha? And what did Sasha mean about HR? And… and why were they being so… nice? So… understanding? It wasn’t an act, or at least he didn’t think it was. They seemed… genuinely fine with it. Accepting, even.

It was the strangest thing Martin had experienced in a while, and that was including the worm-riddled woman who’d stood outside his door for two straight weeks.

From there the day just… went on as normal. Tim installed the app on the phone, Martin’s robot phone lady spoke for him, the three of them did their work, and everything was fine.

Until, of course, the nature of their work reared its ugly head. They were discussing the statement of Leanne Denikin, case #0051701, which they had yet to attach a pithy name to; hence the discussion. It had long since become standard practice to attach a name to the “weirder” statements, to make them easier to discuss. (Jon insisted on using the case numbers on tape still, which was annoying, given that was the only place he did that.)

Martin was reading through the statement, and he typed into Tim’s phone: What do you think of this bit? “Be still, for there is strange music.”

What came out of the phone’s speakers, however, was garbled static followed by high-pitched screeching that startled Martin so much he actually dropped the phone.

Jon was walking in just as this happened; he stopped in the doorway, blinking. “What on Earth was that?”

“Martin’s robot lady gave Tim’s phone an aneurysm, I think,” Sasha said, eyeing Martin as well.

Martin scrabbled on the floor for the phone, pulled up the app (which had crashed), and typed, I don’t know what happened!! I was just typing in something from one of the statements!

Jon frowned at him sharply. “What are you doing with Tim’s phone? Are you quite well?”

“No, Martin is not ‘quite well,’” Tim said. “Non-verbal for the day.”

Then Jon did something that stunned Martin: Jon signed at him, specifically, “Do you know sign language?” He spoke aloud as he said this, too, but also raised his eyebrows and gave a quizzical tilt to his head to convey that he was asking a question.

Martin blinked rapidly, then signed back: “Yes, actually. But Tim and Sasha don’t.”

Jon nodded, then said aloud, along with signing, “Why are you non-verbal, exactly?”

“I have autism,” Martin signed. “Sometimes talking is overwhelming and sometimes, especially in stressful situations, I can’t talk at all. Woke up that way today. It should be gone by tomorrow morning.” Why was he explaining so much more to Jon than he had to the others? Maybe just because Jon knew sign, and thus could communicate in a language Martin found much easier than even the typing.

Jon frowned thoughtfully, then nodded again. Then, still speaking and signing both, “What were you typing into your phone?”

“Be still, for there is strange music. From the statement.” Martin gestured to the statement on his desk.

Jon’s frown deepened and he repeated the words. “‘Be still, for there is strange music….’” His expression went slack for a moment, and then he shook himself. “Right. Well. Just… just… I’ll be right back.” Then he abruptly turned and left the room.

Tim and Sasha exchanged bewildered looks. Then Sasha asked, “Do you know what that was all about?”

“I forgot Jon knows BSL,” Tim replied thoughtfully. “Hard of hearing on one side. Not that he’d have agreed to interpret all day or anything.”

Martin shrugged. It’s alright, he typed. This works just fine.

“Well, no, obviously not for some things.” Jon had reappeared as suddenly as he’d disappeared, holding a small brown notebook the size of Martin’s hand. “Here,” he said, thrusting the notebook at Martin. “This will work better, for communicating about the statements. You needn’t use it with me, of course, unless signing is also taxing.”

Martin stared up at Jon. There was an entirely new look on his boss’ face. Not any level of scorn or sneer, nor even concern. He was… nervous. Fidgety. Like he was offering a gift that he was afraid might be rejected.

Something went flip in Martin’s stomach and it was like the entire world turned upside down. Suddenly, in light of Jon’s actions in the last 24 hours, he saw the way his boss had acted toward him the last six months for what it was: a defense mechanism. Armor pulled up around someone fragile and soft and sweet, someone so terrified of rejection that he went about making sure it happened preemptively so he wouldn’t be hurt.

Martin had a sudden, fierce desire to hug Jon and tell him everything would be okay. It was so bewildering a sensation--he didn’t even like the man! At all!--that he just took the notebook with a nod and a signed “Thank you,” eyes still very wide.

Jon nodded in return. “You’re welcome.” He let out a breath, and seemed to relax a little. “Well. Then. I think we’ve found the name for this one, given the way Tim’s phone reacted to those words. ‘Strange Music’ it is.” He straightened himself. “Tim, you said something about the organ reminding you of articles you’ve read…?”

Tim nodded, expression suddenly serious. “Yeah. I’ll see if I can find them for you.”

“Right. Well, then, Sasha, if I could ask you to look through the Archive like we talked about? I’m certain we’ve had a statement from Jane Prentiss.” Jon then turned to Martin. “And if you wouldn’t mind helping me with ‘Schwarzwald?’ You used to work in the library, right?”

Martin was still staring at Jon in confusion, but nodded.

Jon actually smiled at him. Faintly. “Well, then, I’m certain you must know where to find the German history reference books, if you could go grab whatever they’ll let you bring down?”

The strangest thing about it was, Jon seemed sincere. Like he actually believed Martin did, indeed, know the library well enough to just… go up there and find the German history reference books. The faint, confident-in-his-assistant smile was a new look, at least directed at Martin; he’d seen Jon look at Tim and Sasha that way many times before.

Martin’s stomach was doing cartwheels. There were butterflies taking up residence in his intestines. His heart was pounding. How had he never noticed how nice Jon’s smile was? Soft and small, like he was afraid to let it actually take up residence on his face for too long.

Oh, God, oh, no. Martin could not fancy his boss. Jon hated him. Or, well, no, evidence suggested that perhaps Jon did not hate him, but Jon most certainly did not fancy him. This crush had to disappear, just as fast as it had come. This would not do.

He was going to be writing poetry again tonight, wasn’t he? Crap.

“Martin?” Jon’s tone was concerned rather than sharp, and the way Jon said his name made Martin want to sink into the floor.

Instead, he scribbled furiously in the notebook and held it up so all three of the others could see: Yeah, sorry, was just thinking about where that’d be. I’ll bring them down as soon as I find them.

Jon practically beamed at Martin’s use of the notebook and he nodded briskly. “Right! I’ll be in my office when you have the books, then.” He started to turn away.

Martin’s heart went pound pound pound because oh wow Jon was really cute when he let that smile take up more of his face. Throwing caution to the wind, he made a noise to get the other man’s attention.

Jon turned around, quirking a brow. “Yes, Martin?”

Martin signed, “Tea?” He, too, raised his eyebrows and tilted his head to indicate the question.

Jon nodded. “Tea would be lovely, yes.” He smiled at Martin for a brief moment, and then suddenly looked flustered. He glared at them all. “Anyway,” he snapped in his ‘boss’ voice, the impact of which was ruined by the flush rising in his cheeks, “there’s still work to be done. So let’s… do it.” And with that, he turned on his heel and left the office.

Had Jon blushed because Martin had offered him tea? Did Jon like his tea that much? Was Martin imagining things? He had to be imagining things. He put his head down on the desk and wrapped his arms over it so he could grab at handfuls of hair. What was happening to him?

Sasha tried to make her voice serious, but couldn't quite manage it past quite clearly holding back giggles. “Mourn for poor Martin, working alone with Jon.” She looked at Tim. “We should call HR preemptively, it’ll be a bloodbath.”

“Nah, I think Jon’s softening on our boy,” Tim said with a laugh. He reached over to ruffle Martin’s hair with one hand while he took his phone back with the other. “Don’t worry, Marto. I told you he’d come around one day.”

Martin looked up at Tim with a stricken, betrayed expression. In the notebook: Is this how you comfort me in my hour of need??

Sasha shook her head. “For once, Tim’s being serious. You weren’t in the room when Jon explained things to us. He’s worried about you, he doesn’t want you to have to leave the Institute alone, he doesn’t want you to have to look for the Prentiss statement in case it’s ‘too traumatic’ for you to run across on your own. He actually asked us if we thought we should avoid any mention of Prentiss altogether in your presence.”

“I told him no,” Tim said. “I hope that was okay. You seem like you’d rather deal with trauma by facing it and figuring it out, rather than avoiding it entirely.”

Matin gaped at them. Really? he wrote. Jon’s… worried about me? Really? As if he hadn’t seen the evidence just now that Jon was, indeed… softening.

Tim gave Martin a very serious look. “I’ve told you before… I’ve known Jon, well, not as long as I’ve known Sasha, but for a long while now. He’s prickly and thorny, even to people he cares about, but that’s a front and I’ve said so. You just didn’t believe me.”

“In Martin’s defense,” Sasha put in, “Jon’s been awfully ‘prickly and thorny’ to him specifically.”

Tim put up a hand. “Oh, I agree. I have had words with our dear boss about the way he treats Martin, largely because I’m one of the few people he might actually listen to.” He looked at Martin. “I don’t want to take the credit, because it’s really been a remarkably fast turnaround, but I’d like to think I helped, a little.”

Martin frowned thoughtfully. Thank you, he wrote. If Jon’s at ‘I can stand Martin’ instead of ‘Martin is the source of all bad that happens in the Archives’ work might be… better than tolerable, for once.

“That’s the spirit!” Tim said with a grin. “Now, then, Jon did say to get back to work…”

Jon gave Martin another of those soft smiles when Martin brought in the tea, a smile which widened on seeing the stack of books he carried in right after. That afternoon, spent sitting and going through books and discussing the Schwarzwald statement, was the first of many they’d spend together, reading and talking and comparing notes.

Martin was feeling verbal again the next morning, but he kept the notebook. If nothing else, it was a good place to jot down poetry. And it came in handy when he found himself unable to speak the morning after Jane Prentiss’ attack on the Archives.

And the morning after Jon confronted him about his CV.

And the morning after Jon disappeared, leaving Jurgen Leitner’s body at his desk. (Martin blamed that on the corridors more than the body, really.)

Funnily enough, he didn’t need it the morning after the Unknowing. But he kept it with him that day all the same, the first gift Jon had ever given him, and one of the few things he had left of him with Jon in a coma.

--------------------------------------------

When they reached Daisy’s safehouse in Scotland, Martin had hoped he’d somehow manage to dodge the threat of going non-verbal. He’d been the one to drive the car, over Jon’s protests; it was something to focus on, to keep him remembering he was alive and real. He’d clutched the wheel and driven north north north with Jon giving directions in the passenger seat.

Martin had finally figured out that it was the chance to stop and think about trauma that led to his being non-verbal, which was why it was almost always a thing that hit in the morning. Adrenaline would keep him running after a stressful event, and then he’d carry himself through the rest of the day trying to clean up whatever mess had been caused. But sleep was enough for his body and brain to both tell him to stop, to process, to deal with whatever he’d run into.

It was possible, in hindsight, that he’d gone non-verbal more than once since the Unknowing and just hadn’t noticed because he’d been barely interacting with anyone. He’d certainly had a bad bout the morning after his mother’s funeral, dealing with so much misgendering and fake smiles. And there had been more than enough trauma to try to process in the past year, so it must have happened before.

He’d just really, really hoped it wouldn’t now, because he didn’t want to put Jon through that. (Why he thought he was putting Jon through anything he didn’t really want to examine. It made him feel Lonely, and that was bad.)

At any rate, the realization of why he went non-verbal had led to him keeping busy in order to hold it off, in order to hold himself together. So he drove, and he puttered about the cabin poking into cupboards, and he talked to Jon, and he talked to the shop lady in the village, and he brought back food and made dinner with Jon, and everything was good and fine.

And then he woke up the next morning, in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room, and he could not speak.

There was the smell of bacon and eggs and pancakes cooking, and Martin made his bleary way out into the main room of the cabin and peered at Jon, already up and dressed and cooking.

His boyfriend turned to look at him and smiled, one of those soft smiles Martin had come to love so much. “Sleep well?”

"Not really,” Martin signed. “I mean…” He gestured at his throat.

Jon nodded. “I figured you might feel that way this morning. I, uhh… hold on a moment, I need to….” He grabbed the pan of bacon and moved it off the heat, pulled a pancake off the griddle and deposited it on a plate, then turned off the stove and went to poke around in one of the bags.

Martin chuckled fondly. “What’re you looking for?”

Jon was still digging through his bag. “When I was grabbing essentials at the store, back in London, I was thinking, you’ve been through a lot, and the notebook I gave you before must be full if you even have it anymore. I know you were writing poetry in it, and… oh, here we go.”

Jon came up with another small notebook. This one was not plain and brown, the way the first one he’d gifted Martin all those years ago had been. This one was black, and had silvery stars on its cover that, as Jon held out the book and thus tilted it through the light, shimmered into rainbows.

“Just in case, you know, the shop lady doesn’t know BSL.”

Martin blinked at the notebook.

“It, uhh… I know it’s not your usual style,” Jon said, his voice suddenly nervous. He was looking down at the notebook as he spoke, instead of at Martin. “Not… retro. But… I saw it and I thought of you.” He paused. “That tape, where you were talking to Simon Fairchild. He talked about the ‘cosmic scale,’ and how we’ve never even been alive on that time frame, and you said… what was it? You said, ‘I think our experience of the universe has value. Even if it disappears forever.’ And I just… that was… maybe the most… it was very… you. And there were other options, flowers or cursive writing, o-or… I don’t know, they all seemed so obvious, but this…”

Jon swallowed, and finally looked up at Martin. “I thought, after the Lonely, you might like a reminder that, you have value. That… that to me, you shine as bright as any star.” And then he flushed, and Martin knew it was for him, just as he now knew the flushes about tea all those years ago had also been for him.

Martin was gaping. Oh. Oh. Jon… loved him. Which he’d known, intellectually, but the emotional knowledge of it hit him suddenly, took his breath away. He knew it, all at once, in that “oh we could spend the rest of our lives together” way he’d never really thought he’d ever feel.

Jon had clearly misinterpreted the expression; he started stammering, “I-if… it it’s bad, I can… well, no, I can’t take it back, stupid, I should’ve just grabbed the one that had--”

Martin cut him off by reaching out to take the notebook from Jon and reached out with his other hand to cup the shorter man’s cheek. He smiled, and because he’d realized long ago how well Jon responded to physical touch, he leaned in to plant a soft kiss on his boyfriend’s forehead.

Then he pulled back to put the notebook aside on the counter and signed, “It’s perfect. Thank you.” A pause, and then, “I love you.”

Jon smiled, both speaking and signing, “I love you, too.”

And for once in his life, Martin knew that to be true, and trusted that knowledge. He was loved. He had been loved, and he would be loved for the rest of his life, whatever state his voice was in.

[baschool]

503 Week - Day 3

Up a Tree

Was it really asking too much for them to have a normal vacation? Yes. Yes it was.

For @503week, EdWin, post-series.

Read on AO3

First the train robbery, then the murder at the museum, and now they were stranded in the woods, stuck under a rock as it poured down rain. Ed groaned, picking a stick out of his hair. “I’m starting to think we shouldn’t let Al pick our vacations anymore.”

The three-week, all expenses paid trip through the Aerugonian countryside had seemed great on paper. Private sleeper cars on the trains, rooms at the nicest hotels, dining reservations, tickets to just about anything they could have dreamt up themselves. It was almost disgusting, but it was a hell of a way to celebrate their tenth wedding anniversary. No kids, no work, no responsibilities, just the two of them stuffing their faces and sleeping till noon in beds bigger than their entire bedroom back home. There was also room service. Lots and lots of room service.

Winry leaned against him as they shuffled to fit under the shared jacket. “He’s secretly trying to make himself head of the family and trying to off you for the spot.” All the drama at the Aerugonian National Museum gala had been an eye opener to what people would do to be able to crown themselves as the head of the family.

Ed snorted and wrapped an arm around Winry’s waist. The leaves they’d scrounged up crackled beneath them. “He can just fight me for it, then. He’d win.”

“It’s okay, I’d still love you,” Winry replied, patting his thigh in a conciliatory way.

“Thanks.”

They lapsed into silence. There wasn’t much of anything to do at that point besides wait. It was too hard to see the trail and there was no way they were going to risk wandering around in the woods, possibly getting even more lost. The only upside was that it wasn’t too cold, but there was enough of an edge on the wind to make them shiver.

“How long until you think they send out a search party? The horses must have made it back to the stables.” Ed’s sense of time was skewed by the clouds, but his internal clock was pointing towards it being past noon. According to the tour guides, the horses knew the trail and would take them through the woods, no guidance needed. That had held true, until something had spooked Ed’s horse, thrown him, and taken off. When Winry had dismounted from her horse to come check on him, hers had bolted too, leaving them stranded. They were barely past the halfway point of a five-hour ride and the “possible drizzle” in the forecast had turned into “total washout”.

Next to him, Winry tugged on the laces on her boots as she tightened them. They were both soaked and muddy, and Ed was pretty sure he had a rock stuck between his automail toes. At least neither of them was injured, though Ed’s shoulder was starting to smart from his landing. He’d probably feel that in the morning.

And they had no supplies, either. Their bags had been packed with their lunches, water bottles, and some emergency supplies for an accident just like this… Except the bags were attached to the saddles, which were still attached to the absent horses.

Ed decided he really hated horses.

More silence, more rain. Ed felt himself starting to doze when the crack of the branch caught his attention. He could make out the shape of something pushing through the woods towards them. The rangers, finally.

Winry heard it too and disentangled herself. “We’re over here!” she called, standing up and waving.

The shadow straightened up, raising its arms in reply as it stepped out of the thick underbrush towards them.

“Oh, that’s a bear,” Ed stated, as if he was commenting on the weather.

In the end, the park rangers did find them, halfway up a tree. It had been nearly four hours by that point, the bear hadn’t left them alone, and they were both definitely going to come down with something from being soaked for so long. But they had a fancy private berth on the train with their name on it, and plenty of stories to tell.