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The end of the world
#glitch productions#murder drones#serial designation v#uzi doorman#serial designation n#murder drones cyn#cynessa#cyntessa#absolute solver#murder drones ep 8#artists on tumblr#envuzi#nuziv#digital art#Idfk what ekse do i put here#How does tumblr even work#I spent 11 hours on this shit if it flops I'm krilling myself#I mean I made it before episode 8 came out I'm just posting all my old art on here too#Do people even read the tags#If you read the tags can you call me a stinky bum bum in the replies#Thanks#Lina draws
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Me thinking about the fact that during the 19th and 20th centuries there were several proposals to unify romania and bulgaria, mostly made by bulgarians: alrighty, now how can I make this angsty
#Just talking recreationally#Hetalia#Bulgaria#Romania#Aph#Hws#Yeah im feeling brave today and maintagging my random thoughts XD#Ro/bul is like my main ship when im looking for angst and shit. The opportunities are endless#I like that they werent always allies yknow?#Ill be honest I also like unrequited/one-sided ro/bul(at first) with bul being in love. Like head over heels for Ro#While romania seemingly is not.#And like. In my hc romania has commitment issues and trust issues(i will elaborate on this one day haha) in general so like.#He might care about bulgaria somewhat(and might even love him?) but the proposals for an union kinda Scare him.#And even if they were allowed to unite. He has so many fears about that. Most of them boil down to:#“What if we are incompatible. What if we ruin our friendship. What if it ends badly.”#I mean. They last time they were sorta united was during the second(and maybe first?? Idk at the moment) bulgarian empire.#And they didnt always get along even then. Etc etc#Im tired atm so sorry if some of these dont make sense. My hcs and ideas are actually a bit more complex but I dont feel like really#Explaining them at the moment. Also if I messed up some history sorry. Also a lot of ideas for their relationship I didnt even mention haha#Do people even read the tags
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I'm supposed to post here every now and then, huh? Sure would be fucking great if I remembered I made this blog for a reason.
I promise not all my self portraits are me sitting and looking depressed. Different version under the cut.
Kinda dig the black and white. Dunno if it's my style though. Was cool to play around with anyway. Been struggling to find my style, actually. Guess I gotta do more art for that.
#cw self harm#cw eyestrain#think thats all the content warnings this needs#let me know if theres something else#not me#my source self is a special interest#so i know you bitches shove me in the content warnings#yeah i see you#/lh#thinking about scheduling posts#at least id remember#am i supposed to add more to this shit#do people even read the tags#why the fuck do i care actually#this blog is for me#i can add however many fucking tags as i want#i can add 100 if i want#tumblr probably has a limit on that though#think ill schedule a few posts every now and then#fingers crossed i remember i guess#exposure tags incoming#jeff the killer#jeffery woods#jeff the killer fictive#creepypasta#creepypasta fictive#fictive#system#plural#osddid
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YEOWCH!!1!!
I wanna do a lot of art today but my neck hurts :(
#poisoned rants#non kg stuff#im gonna try to ignore it so i can manifest all that i ask of myself#i took a tylenol so i should be pretty good as soon as that kicks in#but seriously my neck hurts and i have scratchy throat so i might not be able to do all of the things i wanna do#but i will get most of them done#hopefully#maybe#do people even read the tags#cause thats the main part of this post that i want yall to read#but oh well#what i put in the post itself says enough. kind of
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the whole "jason rules crime alley and none of the other bats are allowed there!!1!" thing is so funny like. tim LITERALLY lives in the theater where bruce's parents died,
#rimi talks#sorry. thought about tim doing that again. what is WRONG with him kfjshakjdshfkjd#WITHOUT EVEN TELLING BRUCE UNTIL AFTER HED ALREADY DONE IT TOO.#TIMOTHY. WHY.#this is the other thing abt why i just dont like seeing jtodd in fanwork#whenever he appears like 99% of the time its in a way that is directly contradictory to actual comics#the 1% of people who actually read the comics and write him in such a way? fine great awesome!!#however i still am filtering that bitch out because hes kind of a catch-all for the most annoying batfanon tropes.#because. yknow. theres no other tags to filter out bc they dont Fucking tag it#alas. oh well. anyways can we go back to going hey tim what is wrong with you#because for real i think he got off way too easy for this one.#forget identity reveals i want the core four sleepover where tim's apartment gets its lore reveal#give me cassie doing such a dramatic spit take that she gets ice cream on the ceiling. picks up tim like a weasel. and goes WHY???#and hes just like. idk seemed like the right thing to do :)#tim
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I NEEEEEEED Kurt shippers. or just Kurt insane people to know that the german word for tail is also german slang for penis
"You like my tail dont you" said in german ("Du magst meinen schwanz, oder?") will be read as "you like my dick dont you" by a german
this isnt to discourage people from using the word Schwanz, the oposite, i want people to write Kurt saying that because he WOULD
#and yes. 'schwanz' will be read as 'dick' by default#even if it is the only word for tail we have#we will still read that as dick even if it wasnt the intention#to the point of german warrior cats (the suffix 'tail' exists a lot) having to use the word for a horses tail (which is more implied to#be just A Tail Made Of Hair. or an alternative for pony tail) instad of actually 'tail' because . ya know#anyways. i want people to write him being a little flirt and shit but the people that understand Some german without knowing slang#just thinking hes actually referring to his tail instead of.............. not#kurt wagner#x-men#uh what the fuck do i tag this as#Logurt#?#im writing this BECAUSE of a logurt tiktok i saw so shrugs#nightcrawler
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#forever puppy <3#lee know#kim seungmin#stray kids#skz#skz gifs#bystay#skzedit#gagwanzsource#fr though everyones insistence he like wouldnt deal with a dog or whatever had me rolling my eyes#how many times do i have to say that cat guy can love a dog too!! raise a dog!! lee know said he wants to raise a dog in the future#the insistence youre a cat person or a dog person must end. its like being bisexual when people tell you to choose like Naw i dont think so#it was like comments on the kitten interview bein like Wow 🥺 chan was nice to the cats even tho he has a dog 🥺#of course he was you clown. hes even nice to bugs. whatre you thinking#everyone reading these tags pls note: its 2am and i have strong feelings about animals or idk- stop pigeonholing lee know#only pigeon him when he has pigeon hair etc etc.#bye#im not actually angry i just love tangenting on gifsets bc i love to do it
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you know i used to think it was weird how sora and roxas have such different personalities for supposedly being 'the same person' but after playing a few games i sort of realized that they do have similar personalities, because roxas acts how sora does when he's under extreme stress.
compare roxas to sora in, say, kh1. that's where a lot of peoples idea of sora's personality comes from. sora is generally very upbeat and optimistic in that game. not very similar to roxas, right?
but let's switch the game and talk about a game where sora is ABSOLUTELY GOING THROUGH IT. chain of memories.
sora's resting state is melancholy in com. he only ever cheers up in short bursts, usually when he's joking around with friends. just like roxas.
he's quick to anger, and tends to lash out at the organization members. best example of this is when larxene makes him 'remember' namine, and he swings at her repeatedly, even after she's gone. he only stops when jiminy is able to snap him out of it.
you know what scene that resembles?
sora, while a bit more on the angry side and less sad, continues to act like this in kh2 when he's in stressful situations. (he also has a tendancy to insult people which, while it's not very related to the point, is very funny and sora saying 'gonna cry?' to xigbar is great.) i cant comment any further than that about kh2 off the top of my head.
so, roxas acts like sora does when he's stressed, right? but why is roxas always acting like that? to which i say, he isnt!
he only ever acts like that when he's also in fucked up and stressful situations, which happens to be a CONSTANT in his life. but when he's hanging out with axel and xion, a decidedly NOT stressful situation, he's a lot more like sora. he's teasing his friends and insulting his coworkers and joking around and acting like a normal kid. not really important, but unless i misremembered some sora lines which is VERY possible, both roxas and sora respond to friendly insults with "oh thanks!" a lot. just a funny little detail that felt relevant.
the biggest differences between roxas and sora boil down to environment and... i dont know how to put it besides volume? roxas is very quiet and tends to keep most of his thoughts to himself, while sora is very loud and expressive in comparison.
there is one other huge difference i noticed, which is less character based and more story. sora wanted to get off destiny islands and explore with his friends, but roxas just wanted routine. sora wants adventure, and roxas wants things to stay the same, for days where he gets off work and eats ice cream with his friends to last forever, to keep having conversations about nothing and watching the sunset. roxas wants normalcy, sora wants excitement. it's just interesting seeing their contrast.
not sure if this is very well said or anything i just wanted to talk about my boys
#random thoughts#its been a while since i got to use that tag eheheh#i bet theres a few people following me who didnt even know i did analysis posts#the fact that sora and roxas grew up in very different environments is pretty important btw#roxas was already a bit quiet and being in a cult where any expression of emotion is immediately shut down probably didnt help#we'll probably never get a good idea of how roxas would be if he was in a normal situation#id say some of the twilight town stuff might be a close estimate but even that doesnt really fit considering all the shit going down#even from the very start hes being accused of theft hes Not doing the best#anyways. sora and roxas are different obviously#but theyre a lot more similar than people really talk about#kingdom hearts#roxas#sora#not rereading this so it might be a little weird and hard to read sorry
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(good future) Finding Home Pride edition <3
Trans Leo pride is something I see a lot, but personally, FH Leo wouldn't celebrate his gender. He grew up around Gali, who went through a lot of gender struggles, especially in his younger years, and with the brothers being so accepting, it's just another part of his life
But his lack of romantic attraction? That's something that stands out to him. He sees the brothers with their own attractions and crushes and such and realizes he stands out. He's different. But that's okay because he's still him and he's still valid
anyways~ it's pride month, which means i get to be even more annoying about aro pride ^-^
that final shot without text:
#sad•leonart#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt leo#rise leo#rottmnt leonardo#rise leonardo#finding home au#aromantic#aromantism#aro pride#featuring future fh designs to give me more motivation to sketch the next update#might do something for agender pride later#gender is hard a system and we think its a fitting label for our system rather than just wren#cuz 'bana isnt a demiboy#but its a good flag so we usually just use that#although fh probably settles more on a demiboy label#he doesn think much of gender#but he prefers when people view him as something mroe masculine#<- a little bit of big mama trauma in that decision#as a treat <3#shoutout to csp for currupting this whole file when my laptop crashed#and recovering it yeeted a lot of progress#but hey#its done now :D#and i do like how it turned out#even if a few scars are missing but im tired and dont have the energy to fix it rn#tag wall oops#if you read this far down.. hello :D
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The Boy Wonder #1 by Juni Ba rambling about why every time i open this book, i stare in wonder...HAHA and ofc!! how cute Damian is!!
Juni Ba’s style is so absurdly effective in telling a fairy tale for the ages. It’s a stunning blend of simplicity and complexity I'M GRIPPING THE PAGES AGAINST MY EYES…
Before getting into the interiors, THE COVER!! It associates autumn leaves to Damian's Robin title through the iconic cape shape/color; and on top of that, for a Robin going through a big transition in his life...a season of change one might say...Juni Ba your brain...
Damian and the leaves being the only colored parts of this cover is nice in focusing on those elements, but i also like to think by not coloring the background it prepares you to expect impressive inkwork in this book.
On that note, the interiors!! Starting off with Ba's backgrounds of Gotham as it establishes the strange new world that our young hero has been thrust into:
We get a neat tracking shot following a champagne glass that gives us a glimpse of Gotham from the upper echelons to the downtrodden in "Underwell"
This opening sequence quickly lays out the environment Damian will be traveling through in this series! It also sets the tone for some silliness with the cute zoom on the champagne glass before it BOKs the robber lol. Along with Ba's inks, O'Halloran's colors makes every part of Gotham pop - especially love the golds of the higher society shifting into the blues of the underbelly!!
Besides Damian’s personal conflict, Gotham feels like its own entity that he has to contend with. The dialogue speaks for itself, but within the art as well!!
"This city of ours swallows and crushes everything it can" -> a gargoyle's beak over Damian, crowds of people, and walls of advertising
"You've seen it too...the way it coils around one's mind from below." -> bridges and a passing train on a rail viaduct towering over a civilian
"A dark voice calling as if to say..." -> literally, "FEED ME"
LOVELY SHOT OF MOVEMENT... and i love how Damian's venture into Gotham opens with him passing a tree - its branches and leaves are the most organic element on the page before getting into the gritty details of the city! Some yammering because the inks are. so cool: the delicate lines of the leaves in the tree to the thicker/bigger lined ones closer to the camera on the right; the background inks allowing space around Damian's form + the fine line of his grapple!! More O'Halloran praise - PRETTY, and love his coloring over Ba's bg lines, particularly here, keeping the leaves darker on the right.
It's not only a pretty page it's just a really clean layout!! Ba exhibits this throughout the book but i really enjoy it here - from Damian nyooming, we head into these last 3 panels. his cute lil "Robin" shape easily draws the eye to the tops of the panels as we take in Gotham's liveliness alongside the lettering/narration
and the "Robin" shape?? SO CUTE. it's instantly familiar to us as Robin!! bold outline and filled with yellow...it's a Robin in movement!!...AN AUTUMN LEAF IN THE WIND... yeah, still not over that 😭
Damian's inciting incident is introduced in the former panel with a gorgeous backdrop of Gotham in the distance (plus itty bitty Trinity cameo haha). The shot parallels!! beautifully!! in the final page!! Damian is now in the depths of Gotham, his objective out of reach. The colors are of note too, where the familiar yellows of Gotham are suddenly a startling green after the demon makes its appearance. The Gotham land looks even more unfamiliar, which prompts Damian to seek help.
Some speculation, but the green could also be associated with the more mythical side of demons and such (like the ghost?? of the thief), but it could even imply there's a connection to the Al Ghuls themselves as it's the only other time green is so prominently used.
Now that the land of Gotham is established, popping in other fav bgs!
More lovely mix of Ba's inks and O'Halloran's colors!! especially allowing some of the brush/marker strokes to show faintly as part of the twinkling sky...STUNNING!! 😭 i love this whole page but this panel gets me weepy, SMALL DAMIAN IN THE VAST UNIVERSE COMBINED WITH THIS LINE "He knew he could be great. How unfair of the world to make him feel so small." KICKS MY ASS... i need to lie down
YAPPING AT MORE WONDERFUL INKING: the suggestion of windows offscreen from the frames casting these thick lines over the walls and stairwell; the minute shadow details over the railing; the hatching on the suits in the portrait; the framed portrait being its own panel!! cute hooded Damian in the gutter space looking in on the portrait/panel!! CUTE HOODED DAMIANS!!
SPEAKING OF PANELS, along with general effectiveness and efficiency, there's more whimsy in others!! like this kickass page of Nightwing whipping his escrima from first panel -> afterimage lines going POWPOWPOW hitting demons from a distance to ones closer to the camera -> and back into his hand!! IT'S SO GOOD AND SO FUN!!
Ba's action employs more diagonal panels, and characters are less restrained within boxes - there's more energy and freedom across the page!
not necessarily focusing on the action for this one, but THE WHIMSY!! the border itself is goop!! Also gotta point out that looming hammer shape!!
Nightwing's critical hit spans the entire page!! from silhouettes of a flip -> flashy stomping pose/Clayface -> to a distant shot of Dick landing
and a smooth finisher page!! love the motion lines on Dick's arms and waist + his head and arc effects popping outside of the borders; then the smaller panels for quick activity, and the final WOOB WOOB WOOB LOL i can hear this sound effect just as much as i can see it
Along with O'Halloran on colors, Aditya Bidikar on lettering works seamlessly with Ba's vision!! The text boxes for the fairy tale narration are like strips of yellowing pages from an old storybook!! Had to look up the term for this lol, but also reminiscent of those storybooks, there's even a use of "drop caps" - the big fancy capital letter!
Smaller things of note, but the bit of "Weakness" text from Ra's has a kind of. grandiose feel to it. Then the cute B< Damian behind the window!! Love how the bubble and text are faded behind the glass too! The end of the bubble tail is a nice touch as it matches well with Ba's bg inking :0
Otherwise, it seems Ba has done a majority of the lettering - dropping a couple of my favs below!!
also just this whole page: the very loud AAAH! text draws both Damian's and the reader's attention to the panel below!! it's a cool transition to a new shot where you can see Damian's silhouette on the building! The final panel is cartoony violence off-page through the bold POW BOOM SLAM haha + DAMIAN'S LIL FIST!!🥺 and the guy's tooth RIP
Pure speculation - Juni Ba's concept art included Carrie Kelley, so i'm wondering if the hostage in the beginning could be her and we'll be returning to this moment in time by the end. The worn Robin colors are similar to the design + their head is conveniently covered.
In terms of story, I'm obviously heavily biased, but the initial read got me rolling in emotions with how it has you caring for Damian. Damian as a character is so fantastical in essence - it’s part of his individual charm in the batfam cast! an heir of two kingdoms, born and raised with great expectations suddenly thrust into an unfamiliar land. he has a sword. he has a dragon bat for a companion. he is haunted by the sins he has committed. he is two apples tall. he's truly fairytale material!!
LIKE...past the panels of only his silhouettes, this is our introductory appearances of Damian. It's laid out clearly in the narration, but this parallel is SO GOOD: from the powerful and ornate visuals of Damian and the Al Ghuls -> to a simple panel of Batman's shadow behind a boy littered in scars, stripped of his home and status
Damian is out of his element and proves himself in the way he knows how!!
just kick me down a flight of stairs why don't you. i don't know which messes me up more, the top 3 or bottom 3 panels. His facial expressions!! his expectations for approval dashed!! Damian's hand reaching for his father!! only to be left alone with the body. The page after this is the final nail in the coffin in feeling just how lost he is in the world before he acts on it. And you root for him the entire way!!😭
Despite Damian's fanciful background there's so much heart to be shown in his struggles and discoveries - and this classic form of a fairy tale lays it out so brilliantly!! It's shaping up to be an amazing balance of heavier elements and whimsy based on this first issue, and it leaves you wanting more!!
Besides being a thoroughly enjoyable read, it's inspiring work!! i've ordered Juni Ba's other books to consume more of his storytelling, and here's the ones i've found so far if you're interested in checking them out as well!!
Mobilis: My Life with Captain Nemo
Monkey Meat
Djeliya: A West African Fantasy Epic
The Unlikely Story of Felix and Macabber
okay shockingly, i didn't blab about how cute Damian is as much as i thought i would, but i think the collage at the top speaks for itself lol
this is all you need to know how cute Damian is in this!! his cheeks are so pinchable, it was done on page!! 🥺 these panels obliterate me
#rambling#damian wayne#it's been 2 weeks since this issue came out and i'm still cracking it open every other day#throwing my chattering into his tag to possibly get more people into the series especially if you're a fan of Damian!!#i even used capitalization for slightly easier reading LOLL#the Damian collage was taking so long i was laughing how i'm taking more time to do that than the actual ramble#then i started rambling and then i realized i couldn't shut up sdfgh#feel like i sound delusional most of the time so these are maybe my most coherent thoughts LOL#pointing at pages over my brother's shoulder 'love that...so cool...look how pretty that is...' articulating WHY makes me sound insane😭#the boy wonder
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I sure hope Hijotee is doing well wherever they may be... (21/24)
#noco family au#How I Met Your Father (Again)#total drama#total drama noah#total drama cody#total drama noco#noco lore#hijotee's william country#IM BACK BITCHES!!!!#don't worry I haven't offed this blog#uni has just been kicking my ass these past few weeks#final stretch to end of semester and of course I my neurodivergent ass leaves my last few assignments to the last minute#that and I had a nasty stomach flu for like a week so there's that#but yea planning on being way more active here in the coming weeks#hopefully get this bastard arc done by next week#fuck and its almost the blogs first anniversary too#huh#but yea#do people even read these tags?
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a paperback book isnt alive until you break its spine btw like a long slumbering animal being carefully roused it actually needs you to do that like when you click your knuckles. for your paperback book the breaking of its spine is like the first stretch against your pillow in the morning
#have seen people online before say they dont open their paperback books past 45 degree angles so as not to break the spine which is crazy to#me r u afraid someones going to see your books and think they look like youve read them. you are upsetting the book when you dont#break its spine to read all its contents and not even do it that one favour to make the book more comfy youre making it so so sad#also make peace with a book with a broken spine or a bit of wear and tear so that you can start buying books secondhand instead of#off amazon maybe idk#reading tag
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wowowowow awesome look at me doing... things... idk when ill finish this, or how long it will take. i just know id rather be doing this than being in anchordeep because DAMN!!!
Next
#good god i dont think i have it in me to color this.#lord have mercy i have 11 more pages#cw gore#tw gore#cw blood#tw blood#cotl spoilers#god what other precautionary tags do i even need??#cotl#cotl fanart#cotl lamb#cult of the lamb#the lamb#fancomic#i cant say im too caught up in making stuff look pretty rn#i just want to actually HAVE something for people to read instead of just talking about it#put it on the list
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Y'ALL. Y'ALL so for a long time I've believed that "the sun" in Meursault's story is Carmen, and I went to check Hell's Chicken's dialogue to see exactly how he said that he'd dealt with distortions before, and... you know what else he said?
To my knowledge, it is a phenomenon where an individual morphs into a form often unfit to be considered “human”. It has no known causes, and the appearances were all different.
Unfit to be considered human.
Meursault, who, in his book, was judged by the court to be soulless.
Meursault, who has EGO for Cyborgs who have been so mutilated they barely act like people anymore; a murderer who was experimented on until ceasing to be human; a sheep named after Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, a novel about the humanity of androids and the inhumanity of humans; and now a rose that can't help its bloodsucking nature, based on Carmilla, a vampire whose story emphasized the duality between her vampiric traits and her human ones.
Meursault, who answered Heathcliff's ironic question of if he had metal for brains like this:
I'm placing my bets now, that line from Hell's Chicken is foreshadowing for Meursault's canto even more than "I have witnessed a number of [distortion] cases in the past" was
#limbus company#project moon#meursault#sorry of my info on carmilla is off i still havent read the book#me post#CLARIFYING IN THE TAGS: MEURSAULT IS HUMAN#it would be a disservice to his character and honestly pretty gross if he ended up not being human#the entire point is that he IS human and that other people perceive him as otherwise because of how he behaves#so I guess theoretically if he did distort it would exacerbate the issue?#extremely speculative but there are distortions who can behave pretty normally while distorted#like the marksman of the mist (and also some of the reverb ensemble but those people are all full of issues WAYYY bigger than marksman was)#if meursault was one of those...#someone calling him unfit to be human. it's fine it definitely won't leave a scar on his psyche#i think in his canto there might end up being something about how even though people don't see distortions as humans#distorting is a very human thing to do#anyway i think overall there's juxtaposition with him and don quixote#don isnt human and wishes she could be#meursault is human but people don't think he is#yknow despite my theories it would probably be more poignant if he DIDNT distort#them looking at him and assuming he only couldve done something like that if he distorted but he didnt#oh wait but the timeline... they probably wouldn't have known about how distorting works yet#nevermind back to the first idea#they ask why. he talks about a beautiful voice. no one knows about this yet and they all think there's something deeply wrong with him#'a beautiful voice convinced me' holds up in court about as well as 'the sun was too bright'
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not to be like that but also I feel like I was right when it came to "Dorian knows Orym is in love with him"
When I watch the confession and Orym word vomits out "ihavefeelingsforyou" Dorian does not act shocked. Dorian does not act bashful or oblivious. He goes on to say that hes wanted a moment alone with him for days.
Dorian hears Orym's love confession and he goes on his own monologue about how much he loves Orym. Because it was never a question whether or not Orym loved him.
The question has always been "Does Orym know I love him too?" That's why he spends so much money on him. That's why he defends Orym's need for the sword. That's why he's always healing Orym in battle and gets pissed when is not given credit. He has been trying to show Orym that he loves him through his love language.
(Dorian said words of affirmation was his love language and yeah totally. And I totally believe that Orym's is acts of service with a secondary gift receiving)
Idk I've just been thinking about that small moment between them for a while.
#silver sending stones#orym of the air ashari#dorian storm#dorym#It's not too long under the read more it's JUST too long for me to not want to clog up the tag with it#na na i was right#truly though dorian didn't seem surprised#he wasn't even surprised that orym seemed to think dorian didnt have feelings back#like? dorian might not have been in love before but hes very good at reading people it seems#so yeah i think hes known at least since he left that orym felt the same way#or hes always known and before it was a “i don't know what to do with that” then it became “oh shit hes the one with the dead husband”#then it became “no time”#screaming crying throwing up
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bloodletting
summary: a budding god needs a place to test their new powers, and childe was always a little too eager to lose a fight... a match made in heaven!
word count: 1.7k
-> warnings : minor AQ spoilers ? just like, general gi plot.. fairly graphic depiction of blood + other injuries (might be classed as body horror???). generally obsessive tendencies (childe <--> you). i cannot stress this enough, reader is 110% a sadist.
-> gn reader (you/yours)
taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yuus3n || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay || @cupandtea24 || @genshin-impacts-me || @chaoticfivesworld || @raaawwwr || @ryuryuryuyurboat || @undrxtxd || @rainswept || @wanderersqt || @rozz-eokkk
< masterlist >
power was not something that came easy. it was fought over, stolen, defended with teeth and claw, tides of blood shed just so one could have power over another. social, physical, financial; no matter the leverage it provided, power was hard won. to give someone power was to admit defeat, a certain death that tartaglia had learned and taught more than his fair share of times. nobody undeserving of power ever held onto it for long; it was an acknowledgement that you were better, that you deserved it, that you’d won. power was a fickle resource that childe would kill to keep, only ever laying down his blade for a precious few.
the tsaritsa, of course. his fellow harbingers, skilled both on and off-field, who themselves could rival the archons. his family, for whom he’d happily give the world.
and naturally, who would be more worthy to hold power than you?
you, not just a god but the, the highest authority across all of teyvat. you bore a hundred names and a thousand monikers, your worship the one thing the world could agree on. granted, nobody could quite agree on how, but that was fine. childe did not need external powers to tell him what to do. he knew, in his deepest heart, that he had gotten it right.
he knew—and, on occasion, flaunted—that he was your favorite. of all the vessels you had chosen, you returned to him time and time again, wishing on his stars until his vision gleamed. his bow shone with power, even his weakest weapon more than enough to push his strength to new heights. part of him wondered what he could do if you’d granted him swords, or a claymore… but that was speculation for another time. didn’t it say something that you had still chosen him at his weakest?
the thought always made him smile. thick in the heat of puppeteered battle, before the sun to after dark, your presence was a constant in his life. at every altar, with every offering, when his hands stung from the rash of leather and his blade was covered in rust, your name a prayer behind blood-soaked teeth. he could not remember a time when his pocket was not weighted with a charm.
his devotion was no secret. he wore your bow with pride, entirely phasing out his other weapons. it didn’t matter that he was technically more controlled with them, for you had chosen this path for him. your word was his guide, a polar star through bitter nights.
he did not doubt when your presence ebbed or flowed. who was he to dictate when or where you spent your attention? no, his faith did not waver. it had no reason to. he waited patiently, going about his regular duties, lingering in snezhnaya for no other reason that he just felt like he had to.
who was he to question to buzzing in the back of his head? who was he to decline when he felt an instinct to leave, to go for a trip far past the city gates? who was he to think himself better than the guiding light that had never led him astray?
for you, he was whatever you needed. and so he went, armed with a thick coat and snowboots, hands shoved deep in the pockets to hide the slight shake. down the main road, an arbitrary turn into an alley and down an abandoned path, into a part of the city he’d never traveled. but a golden thread had tied itself around his heart, pulling without hesitation. he easily hopped over the fence gate, not bothering with hauling it open through the snow. the path beyond was covered in a thick layer of powder, his foot crunching through a foot of it before hitting solid ground. still, he continued.
snezhnayan winters were not warm. they bit and dug into every gap in your clothes, stealing away the precious warmth within. and yet, with his half-done coat and incomplete guard, he was not cold. or, rather, he couldn’t feel it. his hands were pink with frost, stiff at the knuckles, but he couldn’t feel the resistance. his body was not important, not now.
the snow began to thin. it fell from his knees to his shins to his ankles to his toes, until he was face to face with a thick wall of bramble, impossibly overgrown. he was beginning to overheat in his jacket. twin blades made quick work of the wall, and the sight behind it easily dispelled any breath left in his lungs.
the air that washed out of the bubble was thick and heavy, like a humid spring instead of snezhnayan woods. his breath came in short gasps, a shameful wheeze that he hoped was missed beneath the howling snow. he didn’t want you to see him as weak, as someone so easily tired by a short trip to a falling star; he didn’t want you to think of him as anything other than his best.
but you didn’t push him away. you helped him up—his head was buzzing with delusion, he could hardly see, when had he fallen to his knees?—and brushed the snow off his hair, not pushing him away when he leaned into your touch. he couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, could barely collect himself enough to recognize that he needed to get you inside, away from the wilds.
that was power. to so effortlessly take over every thought in his head, to hold his mind in your hands and pull it into your liking, that was the power he adored you for. gods were figureheads of power, a physical incarnation of their dominion. a god of the entire world would only naturally have power to manipulate that world to their liking. how blessed was he, that he could be the first you made yours.
he was with you when you first stepped into zapolyarny palace, looking around at the chandeliers and fine tile. he opened the door for you to her majesty’s throne room, sucking in a sharp breath as you brushed by. he was by your side when the tsaritsa swore you her fealty, delicately placing the gnoses in your hands.
and oh, how he’d fallen to the floor right then and there, dizzy from the wash of power that rolled off you in waves, an ocean that he willingly dove into. the floor was cool beneath his forehead, his hair sticking to his skin as sweat quickly began to bead. he didn’t bother pushing himself up on his hands, teeth sinking deep into his lip again to control his panting breath. copper bloomed over his tongue, filling his mouth and clogging what remained of his senses.
dimly, he was aware that he was being pathetic, that this would surely change your mind about him. he heard your voice, faint through the fog of his mind, your wisdom lost to his own inadequacy. and yet, despite his weakness, every part of him was tuned into you. he knew it was your hand whispering across his shoulders, he knew it was your influence that stole the breath from his lungs. he knew it was you, because it was always you. you were all he could think of, and now you were finally able to leverage your full power over his self.
he’d woken up in a hospital bed. saline dripped into his arm and the lights pierced his eyes, his head full of snow and iced over. and yet, the moment he was cleared for release, he found himself desperate to be back to your side, racing through the tiled halls of the palace and following the urgent burn in his chest. you would have been right to turn him away, to deem him too weak to stay by your side, but you didn’t. you smiled when he lost his breath and laughed when he wavered, brushing off his concern. you invited him with you—his lungs burned with the need for oxygen—as you twirled the gnoses between your fingers, as if they were toys or paperweights rather than objects of divine power.
divine to him. child’s play to you. a courtyard of snow was cleared in an instant, ripples of pyro melting permafrost while keeping the flora beneath intact, a lazy show of power that pulled little more than a slight hum from you in response.
he wasn’t so much a fool as to think he could teach you everything, or even something, about being divine. and yet he clung to your side like a sailor in a storm, watching as you grew familiar with the elements. he watched, stubborn and weak, as you stopped hesitating.
flowers bloomed as you walked by, crumbling to ash with the slightest look. electro jumped from your skin to his, a painful spark that drew his mind from his head, finally seeing your amused eyes instead of just mindlessly staring. you could—should—have just left him behind, but you didn’t. you instead asked for his help, taking his hand in yours and leading him to a quieter hallway of the palace. you didn’t comment on his thundering pulse despite the fact that you could certainly feel it, tracing a finger along the crease of his palm.
“i wonder…”
a claw of geo cut across his skin, a sharp sting that quickly welled with blood. he barely felt it, watching with detached awe as it filled up his hand, sliding over the edge and dripping to the floor. you didn’t show any emotion, just… watching. his heart beat in his hands, a pool collecting on the floor, and still, you just watched. your other hand moved over the surface, barely an inch away, the blood collecting in a bubble beneath it. with a hum, your fist tightened, pain lighting up his arm. a strained grunt slipped between his teeth, hand flinching closed, brushing against the ball of his blood you had pulled from his veins. his hand was stained red, shaking in your grasp, minutes stretched into hours.
all at once, it dropped, forced back into his body as forcefully as it was removed. with a snap, the skin stitched itself shut, and you were again dragging him along like a child did their favorite toy.
you did that a lot. pull him aside and experiment with whatever new reaction you had discovered that month, week, day, hour, watching his reactions with unabashed delight. and he let you. every time, without fail, he eagerly followed, knowing full well he’d end up rigid with lightning or with ice crystals studding his throat. it was worth it, though. you always fixed him up, squeezing his hand with a whispered ‘good job’ that never failed to make him dizzy.
it didn’t matter what you did to him. it never did. even when his mind was hazy with pain and he couldn’t quite stand on his own, he never regretted it. unconsciousness licked at the edges of his vision, burning black stains that lingered even after you stopped, but he never once hesitated.
if you asked him to jump, he’d ask how high. if you felt like holding him underwater, he’d cherish every bruise. to be kept as a toy was still to be kept.
#THIS WAS MEANT TO BE A REPLY TO AN ASK. UH. SORRY AVATAR ANON ...#genshin#genshin impact#genshin sagau#sagau#self aware genshin#genshin x reader#gender neutral reader#sagau childe#yandere childe#childe x reader#x reader#yandere tartaglia#sagau tartaglia#< do people even use the 'tartaglia' tags? oh well#yandere sagau#blood tw#tw blood#< for good measure#ah yes my favorite genre. 'you're both unwell and need to be quarantined for the good of society'#hes so. rat coded im in love with him#sorry for fatui posting. it Will happen again#sorry for yan posting. it /Will/ happen again#like seriously the next few ideas ive got are all about unwell men#i dont know if id count this as obsessive but its certainly A form of lovesickness#but i feel when people read 'yandere' they think of something else than i do#and for That perception then 'obsessive' fits better#i will be flagging this with the yan warning on my masterlist#childe ajax tartaglia my favorite chew toy <333#hes so fun to beat up i wanna make him cry about it. i mean what who said that
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