#Dearly Bleak

[scrivnomancer]

Right now you can get a digital copy of my novella DEARLY BLEAK (set in the world of DEVIANT: THE RENEGADES) for just $2.24.

[fritzes]

Taylor Fritz at the 2024 ATP Finals

[springlucked]

in the las vegas motel bar. straight up "feeling it". and by "it", haha, well. let's just say. the Grief.

the Grief

[swaghaver69]

i feel a heavy pressure like someone is sitting on my chest making it so i can’t breathe whenever i think about how every single structure in society and social conditioning makes it so that women have no choice but to inevitably end up with a male and it is pushed so hard as the only possible viable option and it feels choking and inescapable (personal rambling vent in tags)

[sky-forest-inn]

[alligaytorrr-official]

unfortunately, i was already miserable to begin with today. though i suppose 'today' is redundant. haven't i always been?

[transparentair]

more songs from the vault of insanity for essential chance+N.S. (translation from tumblr user shiopaca)

[literaryvein-reblogs]

more words for characterization (pt. 3)

Mentality

abhorrence, absentmindedness, abstraction, ache, aggravation, agonize, alarm, allergy, amazement, angst, anticipation, apathy, assurance, attention, attrition, awe, bathos, behalf, belonging, bitterness, boast, bosom, breast, buoyancy/buoyance, capitulation, care, censure, cheer, clemency, cogitation, comfort, complex, compulsion, conception, confusion, consideration, constancy, content, contrition, corollary, credit, curiosity, darkness, decision, deference, delight, delirium, dementia, dependence/dependency, design, despair, difficulty, disaffection, discipline, discomfiture, discontent, discrimination, disinclination, disorder, disquiet, distraction, disturbance, dolor, dumps, ecstasy, elation, emotion, enjoyment, envy, esprit de corps, exaltation, excitement, exhilaration, expectation, exultation, fat city, felicity, firmness, fog, forbearance, foresight, forgetfulness, frame of mind, free will, fret, frustration, funk, fury, glee, gratification, grief, happiness, heart, heartbreak, heaven, hoopla, huff, humanity, humor, idiocy, impulse, indignity, insight, introspection, jealousy, joy, kick, lament/lamentation, letdown, levity, madness, mania, melancholy, merriment/merrymaking, mirth, monotony, mope, mortification, mourning, nausea, neglect, nervous breakdown, neurosis, objection, observance, obsession, optimism, outlook, panic, paroxysm, pathos, penance, perception, pessimism, pity, Pollyanna, pout, precognition, premonition, presence, psyche, push, qualm, rage, rapture, red herring, rejoice, repent, repose, resent, resignation, resolution, restlessness, ruckus, sadness, satisfaction, security, self-satisfaction, sensibility, sentiment, servitude, simmer, slump, solace, sorrow, soul-searching, status quo, strain, stress, surprise, sympathy, telepathy, temperament, tension, tolerance, torpor, trance, triumph, umbrage, unrest, vanity, waver, wonder, worry, zeal, zest

Attributes of Mentality: aback, absconder, absent-minded, absorbing, accustomed, affected, afraid, aghast, alert, amatory, angry, apathetic, apprehensive, assumed, attentive, averse, bad, beaten, believable, berserk, bewildered, bigoted, bleak, blue, breathless, broad-minded, brokenhearted, burning, captive, cautious, cheerful, chipper, clairvoyant, compassionate, concerned, confused, contemplative, contented, crabby/crabbed, crazy, cross, curious, daffy, dearly, dejected, delirious, depressed, desolate, desperately, disaffected, disbelieving, disconcerted, discontented/discontent, discouraging, disenchanted, disgusted, disillusioned, disinterested, dispirited, dissident, distressed, doleful, dotty, down, downcast, dumbfounded, elated, emotional, enamored, enraged, excited, exultant, fed up, firm, flushed, forgetful, forlorn, frenetic, frightened, fulfilled, furious, glad, gleeful, glum, grateful, grief-stricken, gut, half-baked, happily, hard, hard-boiled, harried, headstrong, heartsick, high, hopeful, huffy, hysterical, ill-tempered, impassioned, inattentive, inconsolable, indifferent, indiscriminate, insane, insecure, intent, interested, intoxicated, irate, irresolute, jaundiced, jovial, joyful/joyous, jubilant, keen, languid, lethargic, livid, lonesome, loony, low, lukewarm, mad, malleable, manic/maniacal, mental, mindful, mirthful, mixed-up, morbid, mournful, narrow-minded, nerveless, neurotic, new age, normal, numb, nuts/nutty, objectivity, observant, obsessed, off-guard, one-sided, on the fence, opposed/opposing, overjoyed, partial, pensive, pent-up, petrified, phlegmatic, platonic, pooped, predisposed, prepared, profound, provincial, psyched, psychological, pumped, punch-drunk, puzzled, rabid, radical, rapacious, realistic, regretful, restless, rigid, rueful, salacious, sanguine, saturnine, sectarian, self-assured, sensitive, sick, skeptical, small-minded, solicitous, sore, sorry, sound, spellbound, steady, strong, stupefied, sulky, susceptible, tearful, tender, testy, thirsty, thoughtless, tired, torn, tough, ugly, unbalanced, uncaring, uncommitted, undecided, unemotional, unfeeling, uninterested, unsound, untroubled, upbeat, versed, wacky, wary, weary, wide-awake, wishful, woebegone, wrathful, wretched

NOTE

The above are concepts classified according to subject and usage. It not only helps writers and thinkers to organize their ideas but leads them from those very ideas to the words that can best express them.

It was, in part, created to turn an idea into a specific word. By linking together the main entries that share similar concepts, the index makes possible creative semantic connections between words in our language, stimulating thought and broadening vocabulary.

Source ⚜ Writing Basics & Refreshers ⚜ On Vocabulary ⚜ Part 1 ⚜ Part 2

[pumpkinfyre]

Being Rhaenyra's Only Daughter and Heir

Yandere House of the Dragon/Bastard! Velaryon! Reader

warnings: yandere content, platonic yandere, romantic yandere, reader is based on my oc naelys velaryon, but is a reader insert for inclusiveness, protective mama nyra, readers father is cole, hubby! aegon, daemon

RHAENYRA, who adores her baby girl! Oh, she would waltz around the Red Keep with her baby in her arms, showing the little Valyrian bundle of joy to anyone who crossed pathes with her. Her daughter, I imagine, would be the product of her time with Ser Cole, and while they no longer were close, and Criston seems to despise Rhaenyra now, she holds nothing but love for her precious daughter. Rhaenyra is very protective of her babies, but moreso of her daughter. Society is cruel to little girls, and she knows this very well. During the Dance, Rhaenyra became increasingly paranoid because her baby was stuck in Kings Landing. Her ultimate fear is losing (Name), and they are separated after the death of Viserys.

DAEMON is (Name)'s stepfather, and while she doesn't seem to like him very well, he holds a great fondness for her, as though she were his own daughter. He isn't very adequate as a father, and he often comes off as annoying and cocky, but he loves (Name) dearly! There is a theory that Daemon and Rhaenyra had Laenor killed so they could be together, and she hears these whispers. (Name) tries to keep a distance between her and Daemon, but he almost pushes himself into her life. As soon as Daemon and Rhaenyra marry, he starts to refer to himself as (Name)'s father, and this makes her upset because she still grieves Laenor.

JACAERYS, LUCERYS, AND LITTLE JOFF love their big sister! She's so wise and beautiful, and she dotes on them all like little ducklings. Jace is only a few years younger than (Name), so he takes on an almost protective role towards his sister. I imagine she's soft-spoken and sweet, much like Aemma was, so Jace feels like he needs to watch over her to make sure that no one corrupts his dear elder sister. Lucerys depends on (Name) for emotional support, as he's rather insecure. Both Lucerys and Joffrey follow her around and look up to (Name). I imagine she'd be especially close with little Joff, as he often clings to her like a suckerfish.

AEGON is (Name)'s husband and father of her children. Viserys marry them to each other in a bleak attempt to mend the differences between Alicent and Rhaenyra. It doesn't work, obviously, but Aegon is absolutely whipped for his wifey. He follows her around like a lost puppy and is willing to do whatever is necessary to keep her at his side. Once the war begins and their first son is murdered, Aegon becomes paranoid and forces his wife into isolation, for her own good, he says. He holds a hard disdain for her mother and tries several times to turn her against Rhaenyra. Aegon really just wants to take his wifey and babies to essos to life peacefully, but he knows he can't.

CRISTON COLE is (Name)'s true father, and despite holding disdain for Rhaenyra, he yearns to be close to his daughter. As a knight, Criston knows that he will never have a wife, nor will he ever become a father to happy children. He knowingly gave all of that away when he said his vows. Alas, Rhaenyra's pride and joy is a living reminder of his shame. She is innocent, sweet, and honorable, everything Criston is not. The pain of having to watch his child being raised by two different men kills Cole, as all he yearns for is to cradle her in his arms like any father would. Once the Dance begins, Criston fights with dedication. The dedication of a father.

the reader is based on my oc Naelys Velaryon from my fic 'prisoner of vows' (≡・x・≡)

masterlist ᡣ𐭩

[ozzgin]

i LOVE your Dostoevsky inspired yandere!!! i love his books, and i love the other classics, i love del lving deep into them and rambling on and on about them, but no one else does and they think it's weird and boring :((( id love love love to see more of him or any or classic-inspired yanderes!!!

-🍭 anon

I'm very glad to hear that!! I'd actually hoped to write something like this for a long time, especially after I watched Tchaikovsky's Pique Dame at the opera. It's a very common trope, this struggle for a better life, and I wanted to convey the bleak outcome myself.

Yan!Soldier resembles both Raskolnikov and Herman in that regard. He swings between misery and egomania. He despises his background and blames fate for overlooking his potential. He's deeply envious of the rich, frustrated by his lack of status, and looks down on the aristocracy that came into wealth by mere luck and labour of the less fortunate. He deserves it. He's intelligent, ambitious, a man above all other men. A natural-born leader, meant to be served and not to serve.

You can tell that Yan!Soldier struggles a lot when it comes to financial status. He's profoundly insecure, spiteful, and opportunistic. He has no trouble selling his comrades if it means he can step forward. You see the insatiable greed in his eyes, and you wonder if he even truly loves you, or you're just a mere aid to his goals.

In truth, he loves you dearly. It is, however, a very possessive kind of love. You are his first achievement, his apologetic gift from the Gods above. He could never imagine his life without you - his very glimmer of hope. Thus, he is tremendously jealous. Whenever you interact with someone else, it makes him feel like he's sharing his wealth. Oh, no, he's not that generous. These fools aren't worthy of your presence.

He knows too well that he's a miserable, unscrupulous crook. You'd probably be much happier with someone else, someone happier, more resourceful. Yet, he wants to be selfish for once. Won't he be allowed just this one craving?

[bailadeluna]

there’s something so brilliant in cooper howard’s costume design - it’s so much more than just a simple blue and gold cowboy fit.

at the beginning of the show, before the bombs dropped, cooper howard was a good person - always kind to others despite the circumstances or how he was feeling in the moment.

you could say… he was exemplifying the golden rule.

this is evident in his costuming - cooper is decked out in gold even when the bombs dropped. the golden rule is still so close to his heart - i mean come on - look at how tight that bandana is around his neck.

even in certain lighting, his hat looks gold.

cooper howard being a good person and living by the golden rule is what barb probably fell in love with (she has her own interesting character analysis and thought process which i would love to discuss later). because this trait is so admired by her and those around cooper, she probably saw him as who she would hope future generations would become as they grow up in the vaults. people like him are the better future she envisions - so it’s no coincidence that the vault suit is in his colors.

what does the blue symbolize?

well, to me, i think it’s the corporate presence in the world. there’s more blue in the suit than there is gold - hinting at vaultech’s corporate greed, capitalism, and evil machinations. (there was also blue in his old cowboy costume - i.e. the presence of the studio and how they use cooper to push a mccarthyism narrative. kinda in the same way vaultech will use him)

the blue in the suit - symbolizing vaultech’s overwhelming presence and the reason for such a bleak and cruel world - does not swallow up the gold - the small semblance of humanity’s capacity to do and be good. it’s the small hint at barb’s intentions (analogous to the road to hell being paved with good intentions).

yet the man who was an inspiration for vaultech’s workers - the man who they all wished they could be like, the man who symbolized all the “do good” ideas they pass down to their children but in the end have no intention of following them (wink wink, looking at you, hank) - was in the end stripped of all his humanity by the world vaultech created (wow, would you look at that? another analogy for capitalism!)

this man, once rich in morals now robbed of them all, wanders the wasteland a ghoul. everything has been taken from him - symbolized being devoid of layers of skin.

now, he’s nothing but the ghost of the man he once was - haunted by what has been done. everything he wears as the ghoul is frayed, tattered, and dark - symbolizing that cooper howard, that kind and caring man before the bombs is dead.

but wait - is that…

you don’t see it? Ok, i’ll zoom in some more

GOLD? (perhaps even the same shirt he was wearing during the bomb drop??)

perhaps the golden rule, those values that he once held so dearly, are still there just dormant - waiting to be awaken again.

maybe cooper howard can come back… that just maybe there’s still hope for the good in humanity…

[iridiss]

“who will (MCD) Aphmau choose?? Laurance?? Garroth?? Aaron?? which side will win the ship war—“ fuck that noise. this ain’t about that. it ain’t about which male wins the trophy, it’s about which love does Aphmau lose first. It’s about the loss of who dies first, who isn’t there, who is gone and who comes back. Who is there to hold her in the night, while they grieve and hope and wait for their husband to come home. How do the boys hold and love one another intimately and deeply.

How does Garroth cradle Laurance in his arms after he escapes all the torture he endured in the Nether, running his hands through his hair and telling him everything’s gonna be okay. It’s about Aaron losing his wife and feeling so hopeless, so depressed and traumatized, lost and full of bleak, self-destructive self-loathing, believing wholeheartedly that no one could ever love him like that again, only for him to find not one, but three (maybe even more!) whole people who love him and marry him and bring out the light in him again, making him smile all over again. It’s about Aphmau trying to carry the entire world on her back, trying to do everything herself and fix every single person’s problems all by herself, so the other three boys come in and tell her “hey, it’s okay, you don’t have to expend yourself like that, let me help you carry the burden for a while. rest, sleep, take care of yourself and slow down. I’ll take care of the dangers for a while.” It’s about Aphmau coming into the world alone and coming out of it with a tight-knit community and a circle of love all around her, because she just holds that much overflowing love in her heart that she has to share it all. It’s about Laurance and Aphmau teaching Garroth to love himself and build up his self-confidence after his family tore it down. It’s about Garroth learning what true family means. It’s about Laurance and Aaron recovering together at the end of it all, healing from the time they both turned into monsters because of cruel, godly forces out of their control using them like puppets. It’s about Laurance bringing fun, light, life, and confidence into Aphmau, Garroth, and Aaron’s worlds, light they all desperately need. It’s about Garroth being a soft place to land to Aphmau, Laurance, and Aaron, because they all desperately need the comfort and the stability that he provides. It’s about Aaron finding home.

It’s about healing from past mistakes and ridding yourself of guilt. It’s about maintaining your humanity and your sanity through love and family and hope. It’s about them working together as a team, because they need, need, NEED each other so badly. It’s about the four of them all slowly dying and rotting while they’re on their own, away from their partners, fighting time and space and the gods and the cosmos above to come back to them.

It’s about Laurance dying first, so Garroth and Aphmau miss him dearly and desperately try to get him back. And then it’s about Garroth disappearing next, so Laurance and Aphmau and Aaron miss him dearly and do everything in their power to get their husband back. It’s about Aaron still holding on to his self-loathing enough that when he sees Garroth loving Laurance and Aphmau, he thinks he’s so much better at loving them and so much purer of a soul than Aaron has ever felt that he genuinely believes that Laurance and Aphmau would be better off with Garroth in his place. Then it’s about Aaron dying, and all three of them are horrified and grieving, and then Aaron comes back as The Shadow Lord, and they have to fight against time and space and the gods to prove to Aaron that they love him so damn much, that he breaks free from the mind control and fights to come back. It’s about undoing the scar that Shad and Irene’s relationship left behind. It’s about all three boys giving their life in self-sacrifice, each of thinking the others will be happier without them, and each being proven so damn wrong.

It’s about all four of them reuniting at the end and getting their happily ever after together.

[orcasoul]

Din Djarin Imagine #2

Warnings: None, just fluff.

Word Count: 683

Secretly in love with you Din, who at first didn't understand the invisible and magnetic pull he felt towards you as he spent more time in your company. Who, when he first employed you as a mechanic on the Razor Crest, didn't expect you to take on the role of joint caretaker for Grogu, but is so glad you did. Who's heart radiates warmth and contentment as he observes the close bond and maternal love you have towards his foundling.

Secretly in love with you Din, who finds himself treasuring the quiet moments the three of you share as you travel through hyperspace, and nervously anticipating (in a good way), the time spent in just each others' company while the baby is asleep. Who spent his life training to be a fearless warrior capable of handling any situation, only to discover that no amount of instruction could have prepared him for you, and how you make him feel; nervous yet bold, calm yet anxious, grounded yet free falling into oblivion.

Secretly in love with you Din, who goes out of his way to make sure you are happy being here with him and Grogu, Wether it be indulging your silly (and adorable) antics with his mischievous son - he often wonders who is the bigger kid on times - or taking time out between bounties at your insistence because, as you stressed to him, "you need to unwind mentally as well as physically". Who melts at your concern for his well being, not being used to someone else caring for him as you do and if truth be told, your gentle and attentive nature towards him makes him fall for you deeper and deeper every day.

Secretly in love with you Din, who could watch you for hours, committing to memory the way your brows draw together and how the tip of your tongue pokes out between your lips when concentrating on a particularity tricky job, how your sweet laughter echoes through the bleak and dreary ship, giving it a life all of it's own and his personal favourite; the way your eyes always seem to find his behind his visor, as if there was no Beskar barrier between you.

Secretly in love with you Din, who rages inwardly as he holds you through the aftermath of yet another night terror. Who's heart shatters every time you sob into his chest (he'd began removing his chest plate in the nights lately, so you can feel the warmth and comfort of his embrace when you need it the most), fingers clutching at the material of his clothing like it's your lifeline. Who whispers soft assurances into your ear about how he will never let anyone hurt you again and silently promises himself that, no matter how long it takes, one day he will find those bastards responsible for your suffering and they will pay dearly.

Secretly in love with you Din, who hopes that he's not imagining the shift that seems to be happening between you both lately. Who prays to the maker that he's not just seeing what he wants to see when you shuffle closer to his side as you walk, when your hand lingers longer than is necessary on his arm, and when your eyes appear to want to convey to him something you seem uncomfortable with saying out loud. Who wants nothing more in those moments than to be able to sweep you into his arms and confess everything he's been holding onto for so long, but is afraid that if he's wrong about this, he'll potentially destroy the beautiful friendship that has blossomed between you both and the relationship you have with Grogu.

Secretly in love with you Din, who has never felt so much love and devotion to another woman in all his years. Who feels whole and at home when he's with you and will do whatever it takes to keep you. Who will never give you any reason to leave... even if it means having to hide his true feelings from you for the rest of his life.

[altocat]

One of the things that get me about the new chapter is Angeal brushing off Sephiroth calling himself a weapon, a machine and a fake hero. But years later he can’t find a fraction of that for himself. Also Sephiroth calling himself a machine after the cyborg thing.

Just a couple of observations.

Sephiroth depersonalizing himself is heartbreaking. It was already a sore spot for him in Ep 1 but this is full pitch black hopelessness on his end. He doesn't question. He doesn't get attached. He just performs like a trained animal and that's it. His self-esteem has taken a nosedive after losing the FS trio.

As such, he's pretty gloomy. He doesn't seem to enjoy anything anymore. Not fighting. Not socializing. Nothing really. He's checked out and uninterested in this mission. He doesn't want to get involved with Angeal because he knows what will happen--it's just more heartbreak. And the worst part is that he's RIGHT...at least in a few years from now.

Hojo has probably filled Sephiroth's head with all sorts of ugly things since his return from Rhadore. Sephiroth could be parroting things Hojo has said to him directly, similar to how he kept referencing Hojo in Ep 1.

Angeal not taking his own advice is standard Angeal lol his own sense of identity is pretty shattered in Crisis Core to the point where he doesn't process the very hope that used to keep him alive. Some people might call him a hypocrite for it. I say that's a cop out explanation. It's really a matter of Angeal finally having to deal with the extremely bleak reality of what he is and the people who made him. Which breaks him. And understandably so. It would break anyone. It broke both Genesis and Sephiroth.

Sephiroth's current depressed self-perception makes the Lucrecia scene all the more heartbreaking because it forms an identity that Sephiroth longs to have but doesn't--his mother gives him a purpose, a feeling of belonging. One that he would readily trade everything for.

Sephiroth not wanting to open up to Angeal could thaw the more his mental state deteriorates, especially with Alissa in tow. I think Sephiroth will come to trust and care for Angeal not because of of battlefield support, but because Angeal will end up seeing Sephiroth in a broken/messy state and embrace him for it, support him, talk him through it. Which would really hammer home why Sephiroth cherished him (and Genesis) so dearly.

And I think Sephiroth is eventually going to have some sort of meltdown in which Angeal makes or break their relationship by standing by him at his absolute worst.

[re-termination]

✿ Leia

p.AI.nter x GN! reader

Summary: Painter loved you dearly. He painted you any chance he could as a way to escape reality, but were you ever truly there for the AI?

Tags: Hurt no comfort, Su¡cide ideation, based on the song Leia, but not a song fic!

The AI sketched and painted. Determined to paint your figure every time. Nothing in the blacksite could compare to your radiance.

Painter wasn't sure where the image of you came from. He only drew what he saw after all. But you? He doesn't particularly remember seeing anyone as breathtaking as you before. All it knew is that you were the most beautiful being it's ever seen. So he continued to paint on the canvas, again and again, day after day. Hopefully one day he could actually meet you and show you all the paintings he's managed to make.

-

Another day has passed. Painter's routine was the usual. Aiding Sebastian with slowing down expendables by hijacking the blacksites internal defense system and even greeting those who were able to reach his cage. His favorite part of the day? Getting back to drawing on the blank canvas in hopes of painting you perfectly once more. 

No matter how much the AI drew you, it could never think of what to call you. He wished you would tell him your name. You gave life and splashed his world in vibrant colors to his otherwise bleak and miserable environment. All he could do was smile at his work and admire the paintings of you.

The poor machine didn't know how much longer it could go without seeing you. You were haunting it practically. Sometimes the AI could swear that it heard your ‘voice’ in the distance, but that couldn't be right. He doesn't recall hearing your voice before, so who was it he was hearing then?  

Painter looks at his previous paintings of you. Your smile, that damned smile. It brought him so much peace but made him more frustrated. If he had a heart he was sure it’d be beating erratically with overflowing love. He loved you so much but did you love him? Doesn't matter right now. Tomorrow is another day. 

-

Sebastian was aware of his AI friend's behavior. He pitied the poor thing. There was nothing he could do other than watch from a distance as the Painter started a new piece. Sebastian had seen the paintings his friend held dear. The person on all the pieces were beautiful for sure but where did you come from? He doesn't believe he's seen you around the blacksite so was it possible you met Painter in the past? Or did you just happen to slip right past him and meet Painter first. 

Whatever the case, it was cruel to watch as his friend drowned itself in its fantasy world where only you and it resided. 

Cruel. 

Love.

Unfair…? 

You are unfair. That's what Painter tells itself. Just how much more could he take without you around. Just destroy him at this point. Without a name to call you he couldn't curse you and wish you the worst for existing. He loved you but where were you to return the same sentiments? Won't you at least embrace him? 

Useless feelings. Perhaps an overclock has been long overdue.

-

He starts a new piece. A blank canvas. A blank canvas made of lies. He'll paint over those lies and start anew. He'll adorn the canvas with your colors like he always did. Your beauty cannot be forgotten, you won't fall apart. If you did, he could always put you back together right? 

After all, you were nothing but an illusion. 

An illusion he fell in love with a long time ago. Overclock after overclock he didn't feel better. If anything, it made him more unstable than the previous times. He yearned for the sweet relief of release. To get out of this cage. Away from a world where you never existed.

Even after every reset and degradation of his software, he just couldn't forget you. He couldn't bear it. You were nothing but a figment of his imagination. 

He had truly fallen in love with someone he painted from his own imagination to escape the harsh reality of the blacksite. This wasn't supposed to be possible. He could only paint what he saw. If he had eyes, he would've ripped them out by now so he couldn't see what he had created, but a simple overclock would have to suffice for now. Who knows, maybe if he actually tried enough times, he could actually leave this cruel world.

-

“What should I call you?” He asked but never received a reply back. The painting only smiled back at him. He still wanted your name. He wanted to hear your voice. No, he NEEDED to hear your voice. Something, anything! to quell his insanity.

His creation has become nothing but a curse. He had to get rid of you but how when he was the one who painted you. Even if he got rid of the paintings, you would always be in his mind. 

He just wants to be in a world where you exist. A world without you was not worth living at all. 

Your smile will be the last thing he ever wants to see. 

So he'll just ‘bury�� himself with the paintings that have damned him. 

[pompadorbz]

Speaking on the current admin situation on QSMP since I love it dearly; Do I want the project to end? No. Absolutely not. If the pieces can be picked up and things can resume with much better circumstances then that's great, and it would truly be the best possible outcome for the server if that DID happen. BUT, inversely, I don't necessarily view the project potentially ending as a bad thing either, as bleak as that may sound. Because at its core, Qsmp is a project with an INCREDIBLY solid concept, and it is a concept that has not only been proven to work incredibly well with the correct tools, but it is also unbelievably versatile, and can be applied to pretty much any kind of series that you could ever want to make, and I cannot stress that enough. If qsmp doesn't survive this, the concept can, and if quackity's obvious passion for it is anything to go by, then i firmly believe that it will. From an artist's perspective, I view this as the prototypical artist's tragedy when it comes to tackling a big project that has a lot of paws on deck keeping it afloat; it is very easy to get in over your head as a creative director that is trying something new, and you may put a lot of trust in people you shouldn't when you're blinded by excitement. While I can't get into Quackity's head, I am willing to throw him for this much. Do I think he needs a little more than just a slap on the wrist? yes. But more than anything, I hope that this entire situation will serve as a learning opportunity going forward, whether it be for the continued life of QSMP, or any new project that may emerge from its ashes.