| So much for my nine lives |
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Pairing: David Barrón Corona & Benjamín Arellano Félix (Midnight Mass Vampire-ish AU)
For @narcosfandomdiscord NarcOctober - Day 30 - Day of Amnesty (originally Day 29 - Day of Horror)
Prompt: Came back wrong
Word count: ≈ 1.2K
TWs: Canon-consistent & vampire-related(?) violence
This was the part in the all movies where the person in my position comes to the horrible realization at what he is and what he has to do.
So this is like … kinda Barrón and Mín in the universe of Midnight Mass or really like the vampire lore of Midnight Mass applied Narcos Mexico? Anyway, this is just a fun spooky, lil ditty I did. Enjoy Mín finally giving Barrón everything he ever wanted. Spoiler alert: it’s not the eternal life that matters.
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Shocked awake, I sat forward sucking in deep, sweeping gusts of air that crackled through my chest, inflating my collapsed lungs. Like they were two dusty, burlap sacks, the air dragged in and out so sharply and painfully I began to cough. My shirt was caked with dust and dried blood that looked almost purple in the orange menace of the pre-dusk sun. I looked down and at the trail my body had made. Must’ve been when they dragged me into the cave.
But I was dead. Dead just then and I knew it. Now I wasn’t though. I came back somehow. Only, I came back wrong.
I remembered little before I died but the commotion at the cafe. Panicked crowd, a few rounds ejected from my gun, as I grabbed Benjamín by the collar of his jacket, screaming, “we gotta go!” and ran toward safety.
Safety. A funny word to describe Ramón and Kitty, two flashily dressed gangsters, semi autos in hand, beckoning to us from the corner where the street met the back alley road, the curb of which the Escalade was parked on. We’d been so close. I’d shoved Mín in front of me and turned around to return fire at the crowd of fatigues surrounding the armored truck across the street, just before I felt the bullet enter my chest. Then another just under my ribs.
The thing no one ever tells you about getting shot? When a projectile traveling at 1700 miles per hour enters the human body, what you feel first is the shock wave. It juggernauts through you, traversing through muscles, tissue, your very cells, so fast and forcefully, the feeling’s more akin to electrocution. It was a miracle my heart was still beating as the ground came up at me, fast, before I sank into the black.
So much for my nine lives.
Shielding my eyes from the stray beams of sun that peeked through the cracks of the cave entrance, I took a lighter from my pocket and lit it turning to face the dark side of the cave and get a better look at who or what might be inside.
Which one of them would’ve done it? Definitely not Ramón. Not enough self-control. I would’ve been an unintended afternoon snack. Hope would suggest Pancho or Dina, but common sense would suggest otherwise. The only one among them who had been at the cafe with the strength and self-restraint to do it without killing me more dead than I already was could only be Benjamín.
And yet, it was hard to imagine him, sour, overly-critical, Motherest-of-Mother-Hens, Mín valuing me enough to offer up eternity, even if he did owe me his life, what with everything I did for them that night at Christine’s. I rolled my eyes. And that was without an immortal advantage.
With a sly undertone of acknowledgment, almost an echo with my disbelief, Mín’s voice rang out from the shadows that clung to the cave walls. “Tus ojos. Se brillan como se supone que deben hacerlo.”
The eyeshine of a cat. How unsettling it had been the first time I’d caught it in Dina’s eyes. Mistook them for headlights in the lamplight of the warehouse parking lot when we were chatting shit some late night, after they’d finished the count. I’d read somewhere, probably in one of the hundreds of books I devoured, trying to fend off brain rot and existential dread in a cell at Donovan, that it was called tapetum lucidum. An extra shiny layer in the eyes of cats and other nocturnal animals that helped them see in the dark.
“What happened?”
“Your ability to maintain your composure under the strangest, most precarious of circumstances never ceases to amaze us.”
It wasn’t altogether clear if Mín was speaking for the family or if there was actually someone else there with us, the place was so dark. But as soon as I opened my mouth to ask, I was doubled over, a jagged pain drilling relentlessly into my gut, tunneling through my chest, all the way up my esophagus and into my throat. My face was close enough to the ground, the breath I expelled violently kicked dust back up into my face. The flame from the lighter snuffed out when it hit the ground next to me.
“Yeah, you’re going to need to remedy that.”
I let out a grim, stuttering chuckle that could’ve been mistaken for the growl of an animal who just felt the hinges give way, the bar of a trap finally slamming down on its neck.
This was the part in the all movies where the person in my position comes to the horrible realization at what he is and what he has to do. The part where they’re supposed to freak out, panic, clam up at the idea of killing as a way of life. But the sick thing? This wasn’t a movie and I felt not an ounce of guilt or fear at the prospect. I’d been taking human life to live for decades now. No sense in an apex predator apologizing for assuming the nature of its design. Shit, it’s not like I made the rules.
A faint skittering sound along the edge of the walls jackhammered my eardrums and before coherent thought could be formed, the soft warmth of light and heaven itself burst into my mouth, soothing the ragged itch at the back of my throat. Blood from some poor, unfortunate little rodent that had made a home in the cool of the cave leaked all over my hands, as I drew from it; hose from a hydrant.
Benjamín stepped off the wall, where he’d been standing for who knows how long and circled me slowly, waiting for me to finish. When the critter’s body finally hit the ground, he clapped a few times, observing, “Pues eso fue fácil, verdad?”
Sighing wearily, “sí, fue tan fácil,” I wiped the blood from my chin with the back of my hand.
Closing the loop, Mín approached me where I sat, still kneeling on the ground over the critter’s carcass, and picked up the lighter. He flicked it open. Light materialized next to his face, the flame illuminating his eyes, activating that telltale glow of Other. That glow which I now apparently shared with him and the rest of the Arellano siblings.
Eyes boring into his, I addressed him direct, “Why exactly am I here, Benjamín,” landing on his first name pointedly. A name I rarely used out of fear, or maybe respect, or maybe just the desire to avoid whatever grief he might be prepared to dish out to me. What was the point now? As far as I was concerned, there was none. Not when we had forever to fight. But Mín didn’t look like he was fixin’ to fight right now.
“I brought you back.”
Annoying. Not really an answer and my face said just as much.
“I brought you back because we cannot afford to lose an asset such as yourself.” Mín continued, gazing into the fire like he was some kind of ancient sorcerer, divining an answer from it, “Por muchas razones y en muchas ocasiones,” then flicked the lighter closed, “ya has demostrado lo que vales demasiado que te perdamos ahorita. And with our enemies outnumbering us, we need more than just soldiers.”
I blinked back at him slowly, almost lazy but with evident curiosity because I had no idea what the fuck he meant and I was starting to get tired and that burning in my throat was kicking up again.
He stood up, dusted off his pants, and walked toward the entrance of the cave, voice bouncing off the stony walls and getting smaller and smaller the further away he got.
“Y’know if I learned anything from my uncle’s hubris, it’s that when your back’s against the wall, the only loyalty guaranteed is that of family. And since I brought you back, the blood in your veins is blood we share.”
Just when he reached the threshold, sky outside now darkened red by the last of the sunset, Mín turned around holding out the lighter in his hand. Extended, as if to summon me. “That is what you are now, Barrón. Family.”
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taglist: @narcosfandomdiscord, @narcolini, @ashlingnarcos, @artemiseamoon,@drabbles-mc
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ok you mentioned you almost wrote an essay about how deadnames work in the Death Note universe and i am INTERESTED please tell me more
ok here goes:
Most people are gonna assume that trans folks (and cis folks who changed their names) are somewhat immune to the Death Note as they most likely will introduce themselves with their chosen name, thus unintentionally hiding their deadname (or as some argue in this situation, their "true name"). That assumption is wrong.
For an in universe/canon example of the effectiveness of a birth name/chosen name, let's take a look at the mini series Death Note New Generation. (I'm sorry if I get any details wrong, it's been a while since I watched it.)
In one of the episodes we meet a former criminal, who has changed his name to start anew. We get insights into his life; his struggles to move on from his past, his former partner being released from prison and contacting him, his nightmares, but also his new job, his new girlfriend, his new home. Shien (who is introduced in this episode) watches him, though in the end is steadfast in his believe that people can't change and writes down his name - his birth name. From hacked security cameras, Shien watches as the seconds pass by - thirty-eight, thirty-nine, forty - the man doesn't die. Confused Shien checks his spelling, has he made a mistake? There's no way. He wonders... and writes down the man's chosen name, another forty seconds pass, Shien watches as the man clutches his chest and falls to the ground. He's dead. Shien remarks that he can't say wether that man had or hadn't really changed, but what he does know is that this man's chosen name was his real name.
It's very easy to take this example and apply it to a trans person, meaning that writing down their chosen name doesn't immunize them from the effects of the Note.
Though some might ask "But what about aliases?". Simple. The person using an alias doesn't believe that this is their name, that's why Light wasn't able to kill Naomi when she gave him a fake name, she knew it was fake; that's why L revealed his variety of aliases even to his main suspect. They were conscious of the fact that they're intentionally hiding their true name, in this case their birth name.
The last point I want to discuss is the case of someone who's still finding their true name. Let's say for example a person's birth name is John Doe, though they don't connect to that name and rarely use it anymore. They've tried other name's, Jane, Jimmy, Jessica, but none of those have sticked, so they continue trying out different names. In this case, I'd argue that their birth name would still be effective and work sort of like a place holder, as the person hasn't found their true name yet.
tldr: trans folks are not immune to the Death Note and their chosen names are just as effective as a cis persons birth name.
p.s.: I also don't think it matters what name is one someone's official documents/ID/etc., like it doesn't matter if haven't gone through the process of legally changing their names; their chosen/true name will still take effect
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