#Chris Saves Himself AU | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

streamafterlaughter · 3 months ago

Text

Soundtrack to Disaster

Chapter IV: Break Your Pretty Face

masterlist | playlist | pinboard | prev.

song(s) for this chapter: no remorse by metallica, hate you by boston manor, choke by idkhow, let’s talk about your hair by have mercy

chapter tags: swearing, drinking, meanish!eddie, angst | fic tags: Angst, hurt/(eventual) comfort, (eventual) smut, slow burn, enemies to friends to lovers, Eddie Munson x Fem!OC!Reader, Modern AU | This fic is rated 18+ MDNI

summary: everyone seems to be lobbying against you, in favor of the kid that put your brother in jail.

a/n: inspo returning rapidly, don’t let me burn out now.

taglist @children-of-the-grave @five-bi-five @kellsck @faggotinie @xplrnowornever @taccobelle @micheledawn1975 @mewchiili @dreamerjj comment/message to be added!

DISCLAIMER: I do not consent to having my work fed to AI engines, or reposted in any way, shape, or form on other websites. Unless otherwise stated, this is the only account that features and contains this work, and any replication was done without my consent. Please let me know if you see my work elsewhere. Reblog to support the author!

—

“Chris.” You give him your best death glare, arms crossed tightly against your chest. “Talk.”

“In my defense,” he stands from his spot on the floor. “I thought he’d told you years ago. I didn’t think to follow up, I thought it was just, y’know, common sense.”

You scoff. “And you think Eddie has that?”

“Y’know what, kid? Yeah, I do. Eddie’s a good fuckin’ dude. Granted, I guess I can see why you wouldn’t think so under these circumstances, but I have to let him explain that to you. I couldn’t begin to understand that choice.”

It’s like he’s speaking in riddles. What could there possibly be to explain? Eddie testified against Chris to save himself. Case closed, he’s a selfish bastard. “You gotta go see him, Bee.”

“Why do I care?”

“Come on, you care a little. You two used to-“

“Shut up.” You grit your teeth. “You haven’t been here. You have no fucking clue what happened to us.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, whatever. You’re dropping me off though, I’m not wasting gas on this bullshit.”

He nods, unhooking his keys from his belt loop. “Well,” he gestures to the door, “After you.”

You get to Eddie’s trailer in what feels like record time, causing you to frantically rehearse what you want to say to him. You have no idea what Chris has said, why he’s so adamant that the two of you speak.

“Call me if you need a ride home, ‘kay?” Chris unlocks the passenger door. “And please, don’t kill him. I know he looks tough, but that kid’s the biggest softy I know.”

You groan, rolling your eyes so hard you’re sure they’ll get stuck. “I can’t guarantee I won’t at least try to kill him.” You mock his tone from earlier. He shoves you playfully, and you swing the car door open.

Eddie’s underneath his van, an old piece of scrap metal on wheels at this point, and you can hear him grunting as you approach him.

“Careful now, don’t want her wound too tight.” You gently kick his foot, and he slides out from under the vehicle.

“Back for revenge?” Eddie slaps his hands together to wipe off the excess grease he’s accumulated, then stands to better greet you. He turns the music on his stereo down, some obnoxious metal song you’re sure he thinks is super artistic. “Look, I know you probably didn’t want me taking care of you, but I wasn’t gonna just leave you there to pass out on the floor.”

“I just want some answers.”

“Yeah, alright.” Eddie wipes the sweat from his forehead. You can’t help but take him in, white t-shirt covered in black soot, coveralls pulled down low on his waist. His hair is tied back, revealing his soft cheeks and metal clad ears. He catches you staring and waves a dirty hand in front of your face. “Hello, earth to Tweety?”

“Stop calling me that.” You huff, fists clenching at your sides. “No one calls me that anymore.”

“That’s why I like it. But fine, what d’you want me to call you?”

You glare at him. You know he’ll come up with a multitude of nicknames that will make your stomach flip with rage if you give him that freedom. “Bee’s fine.”

“Aw, c’mon, everyone else calls you Bee.”

You shrug. “Shoulda thought about that when you betrayed my trust forever.” He’s too invested in your banter, and you catch him off guard.

“Wow, right to it, huh? No ‘How’re you, Eddie,’ no ‘Sorry I puked all over your shoes, Eddie.”

You flush. “I puked on your shoes?”

His facade breaks, and he grins wickedly. “No, you didn’t. But I had ya for a second.”

“Ugh, can you be serious for like, five minutes? Then I’ll leave you alone forever.”

“Forever, huh? Sounds way too good to be true.” You can’t explain why his words sting. You feel them in your throat. Eddie plucks a joint from his ashtray and pats his many pockets. “You gotta light?” He asks, filter between his teeth.

You pluck your bright yellow lighter from your sweatshirt pocket, offering it to him. “Thanks, Bee.” He winks at you, and you fight the urge to start walking home. He puffs on the poorly rolled joint and offers it to you.

“No, thanks. I only smoke with friends.” It’s a low blow, you recognize that, but the frustration in your chest is building to an unbearable level.

Eddie clutches his chest in mock offense. “You wound me.” He pouts, batting his obnoxiously button-like eyes. You have to look away.

“Well, you said you wanted answers. Let’s see what I can provide.” He hops up onto the hood of his car, feet dangling above his license plate. You stay planted in front of him, posture tense as you debate how to approach the topic. “Why doesn’t Chris hate you?”

Your question throws him off. “What do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb, Munson. You testified against him. I’d be counting down the days til I got out so I could get your ass if it were me. How- why are you guys still friends?”

Eddie shakes his head, inhaling yet another hit. “Chris is just not that guy, I guess. Maybe he had time to think in the hole.” His response is completely unconvincing, and you roll your eyes for the millionth time today.

“That’s bullshit.”

“Okay, you know what? He told me to do it. Said it would keep me out.”

A pregnant pause. Then, shrieking, “And you just listened to him?!” Your voice is octaves above natural, growing more piercing by the second. “Friends don’t do that! They don’t betray each other.”

“Look, Bee, I don’t know what you want from me. An apology? Fine, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I listened to Chris and got him locked up, I’m sorry I’ve made you fucking despise me. I was eighteen, barely fuckin’ legal. I had no priors, no guidance. I had no one to ask for some goddamn help— besides Chris— so I trusted him. If I could go back and change it, I would. I’d rather have him hate me one hundred times over if it would mean a good relationship with you.” He stops abruptly, lips pressed together tightly like he hadn’t meant to say that.

“Well, you can’t.” A weak response, mumbled to the floor.

“Yeah, no shit.” Eddie cranks the music back up, slamming the door on your conversation. It’s another loud, angry song. “You can go now.” He turns his back to you, and you can’t even bring yourself to ask for your lighter back.

“I can’t fucking stand him!” You’re pacing Robin’s room back and forth while she watches with wide, deer in headlight eyes. “He has the fucking audacity to tell me my brother asked him to snitch? He really thought I’d believe that?” You turn to Robin, and she gapes at you. “Hello?”

“What? Oh, sorry. I don’t know, Bee! Think about it. Chris took Ed under his wing. They did everything together.”

“Yeah, you think I don’t know that?”

She shrugs. “I’m just saying, it’s a valid reason to hate him. He was treated more like Chris’s blood than you were sometimes. But, I dunno, I don’t think Eddie would lie. Not to you.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Robin sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. “God, it’s kinda crazy that you can’t see it. The way that kid used to follow you around like a lost puppy, the way he still looks at you now.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” You’re in no headspace to consider what she’s saying, not after what you learned today.

“Please, Bee! He had no fucking reason to take care of you. He wanted to.”

You groan, flopping back onto her bed. “I don’t trust him. I can’t.”

“Yeah, it’s him you can’t trust.”

You sit with it, let it eat you alive, but you don’t respond.

Steve arrives at his and Robin’s shared apartment with pizza an hour later, and offers both of you a fancy IPA that’s supposed to “enhance the flavors of the sauce.” You snort at his pretentious delivery, but accept the drink anyway.

“What did I miss?” He flops down on the couch between you and Robin, remote aimed at the television.

“Nothing much, Bee just learned some very earth shattering news.”

“What?” Steve whips his head in your direction, eyes frantic. “What god awful thing did she tell you about me.”

Robin snorts. “Dingus, relax. Not everything is about you!”

You snicker, and pry a piece of pizza from the box, cheese stretching across the table. “But now I wanna know what would make you this nervous if she did tell me!” You fold the pie before cramming a bite into your mouth.

“No, we’re not changing the subject. What happened?”

You glare at Robin for bringing it up. Steve has a tendency to worry when things aren’t all sunshine and rainbows with his friends. He knows you and Eddie aren’t close, but he appreciates your mutual ability to remain civil. “Robin thinks Eddie has a thing for me.”

“Eddie definitely has a thing for you.” Steve says without missing a beat, unfazed by the bomb he’s dropping on your head.

“What?”

“What? Is this not common knowledge? I’ve known for, like, months. I dunno if it’s a crush, per se, but there’s… something. You can’t tell me you had no idea.”

You definitely did not have any idea. “You’re fucking with me. You have to be, that doesn’t make any goddamn sense! He treats me like shit, like I’m the most annoying person on the planet. He never invites me to hang out with you guys, we haven’t hung out alone in, like, six years. You're making shit up.” You cross your arms, waiting for the argument that doesn’t come.

Steve shrugs. “He knows you don’t like him. Or, he thinks you don’t. I know better.” Steve winks at you, and you stick your tongue at him. “He’ll probably never admit it, but if you just pay the smallest bit of attention to the way he acts around you, you’ll get it.” Robin nods in agreement, like she’s known this all along.

“You guys are traitors!” You groan, taking another messy bite of pizza. “Can’t believe my best friends are telling me the most dreadful news possible right now.”

“Oh relax, drama queen. It could be worse, I could tell you all the things he’s told me about you in middle school.”

Your eyes feel like they pop out of your head. “What the fuck did he tell you?!”

Robin giggles. “Don’t worry about it!”

You flip her off, and she throws her head back, cackling.

—

The Hideout is dead. It’s a weeknight, and the only people at the joint are the same five drunks you’ve grown quite fond of over the last few years. There’s Samuel, a construction worker that’s been on the same job for the last two years with almost nothing to show for it; Jack, the executive supervisor of some uppity tech business in Indianapolis that’s yelling on the phone outside most of the time; Suzette, who comes in on Sundays to watch the game, and Mike and Mark, the old gay couple that tip you really well and call you Dolly.

“More Jack, Jack?” Your perky disposition makes the suit smile ever so slightly.

“Make it a double, darlin’.” He jabs the END button on his cell grumpily, and you pour his whiskey neat into a fresh glass.

You’re about to ask him what’s got him upset, he usually isn’t here during this late, when the door swings open with a creak, barely drowned out by the song blaring over the speakers, one you’d chosen to let off some steam that is very quickly finding its way back.

It’s as if the universe is out to get you. Eddie holds the door open for his date, a date that is certainly not Chrissy Cunningham. This girl looks more like Morticia Addams and a tattoo machine had a baby, and you wonder if this was who Robin had been referring to. She’s stunning, covered neck to toe in intricate ink you could play iSpy with. Her hair is long, dark, and silky, swaying down to her butt. Did this woman lose a bet? Why is she here with him?

He catches you staring and has the audacity to wink at you, pulling a chair out for Morticia. You quickly avert your eyes, suddenly fascinated with the stains on the bar. It’s not two minutes later that you feel his presence in front of you.

“Hey, Tw- Bee. Funny seeing you here.”

You don’t respond to his attempt at conversation. “What do you want?” You deadpan, trying to keep your expression blank. Uninterested. Cold.

“I’ll have a beer, Red Stripe if you got it. The lady wants a martini, extra dry.”

“‘Course she does.” You think you say it quiet enough, but the tilt of his head tells you otherwise.

“What’s got your panties in a bunch, Princess?”

“What? Nothing! She just looks like the type, y’know? Fancy.” You cringe. Luckily, Eddie doesn’t seem to notice.

“She’s so cool, right? Name’s Macy. Met her at a gig.”

“Uh huh. Here,” You hand him his drinks. “Would you like to open a tab?”

“Nah, this is only our first stop.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “And, no offense, this isn’t really an ideal date spot.”

His words knock your brain around. “Date, huh?” The words catch in your throat. “I didn’t think Eddie Munson went on dates.”

Eddie falters, but recovers quickly. “I’m full of surprises, Sweets.” He slides the drinks off the bar, slapping a 20 on the table. “Keep the change. See ya ‘round.” He kisses the air in your direction, and your fist clenched tightly around the soda gun. You spray yourself in the face with club soda, and grit your teeth to keep from screaming.

—

Your shift is crawling by, your only company until eleven being the cook and the seven patrons, two of which you’ve been staring daggers at for the last hour. Someone has queued a slew of slow, sad songs and you have a suspicion Suzette is still sulking about the Colts’ loss.

Eddie and Macy are lost in conversation. He’s staring at her with a stupid, lovesick expression you wish you could slap off his face. She seems enamored, sipping her second martini without ever breaking eye contact with him. It drives you up the wall. As if hearing your silent prayers, Eddie pushes from the table, and holds out Macy’s coat for her to slip her slender arms into. He slips his own leather clad arm around her waist and make their way to the door. You’re almost at ease, finally, but he stops abruptly and pivots on his heel, coming right at you.

“Hey,” He calls, leaning over the bar as you whip around, busying yourself organizing the fridge. “Can I ask you something?”

“You just did.” You don’t turn around, stacking used glasses on the dish rack.

“Can I ask the front of you something?” His voice is teasing. You turn back to face him, finding his face far too close to yours. Behind him, Macy’s tapping her foot in annoyance by the door.

“Make it quick, you're keeping her waiting.” You nod in her direction, but he brushes it off.

“You ever… think about what could have happened? Y’know, with us? If things were different, I mean.” You can smell the beer on his breath, he’s so close.

You shrug. “Not really, no.”

His face falls for a fraction of a second before he recovers, stoic.

“Right, yeah. ‘Course not. See ya, Bee.” He waves weakly, then steps forward to hold the door for Macy, disappearing into the Autumn night and leaving your brain feeling like TV static.

—

You get home around 3am, dragging your sore feet over the threshold with a heavy groan. The apartment is quiet, save for the gym of the TV coming from Chris’s makeshift bedroom in the den. He’s out like a light, snoring obnoxiously as reruns of The Simpsons flash multicolored across his face. You tiptoe past him, into your room where you all but collapse on top of your bed, still fully clothed. Eddie’s question plays on repeat in your head, much to your frustration. Why does he even care if you think about him? Why would he ask you that?

You’re pondering whether to tell Steve when your phone starts ringing.

You can’t hide the exhaustion, wishing you could just curl up and pass out. Steve knows you’re awake, knows you just got home. “Hey, Stevie.”

“Hey, Bee. You okay?” Worry laces your friend’s voice.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

He hesitates, you can hear his breath stutter into the receiver. “Well, I got a cryptic text from Eddie. He told me he did something stupid, was wondering if you had a clue what he was talking about?”

You roll onto your back, groaning into the phone. “Is this really that important right now? Eddie’s dramatic, we know this. He didn’t do anything worth panicking over.”

“But he did do something?”

“Ugh, no! He was drunk. Asked me if I ever thought about him, if we could be friends I guess.”

“And what’d you say?”

“I was honest. I said no.”

“Shit, Bee. That’s cold.”

“What, should I have lied? Told him we could’ve been best friends if he hadn’t snitched on my brother?”

There’s a lilt in Steve’s voice. “Is that a lie?”

You bite your lip, thinking. Maybe you and Eddie could’ve been friends, but there’s no use dwelling on it. “No, it’s not. I don’t like to live my life through what ifs.”

“Okay. I get it. I mean, I get what you’re saying. I get his worry too, though.”

You roll your eyes despite his inability to see you. “Okay, Steve. It’s late. I’m gonna go to bed.”

“Yeah, alright. Sweet dreams, Bee.”

“‘Night, Stevie.” You click the END button and place your phone on the nightstand. After a struggle to get up, you quickly change into your pajamas, swearing you’ll shower in the morning, before flopping back into bed.

—

#st #fics #munson #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x oc #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #fem!reader #mean!eddie munson #angst #slow burn #enemies to lovers #hurt/comfort #sdf #modern au #strangerthingscentral

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aparttimewriter · 3 months ago

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THE SONGBIRD: part four

chirsmd x musician reader !

summary: chris is trying to move on from his breakup, little did he know he would find a connection with one of his roommates friends

social media au ✨

arthurnfhill added to their story

yourusername

liked by chrismd10, taliamar, masonmount, arthurnhill and 678,677 others

yourusername: currently playing mermaids 🐚

view all 10,678 comments

arthurnhill: why didn’t i get asked to play mermaids??

—yourusername: sorry my mum said no

taliamar: look at this wife material right here !

—yourusername: STOP IT !!

user: not mount is lurking in the likes 😂

user: she’s so fit !

chrismd10: what you didn’t see is when a wave knocked her on her ass

—yourusername: stop exposing me ! or i will block you christopher

—chrismd10: is this a threat ??

user: i can’t get over the fact that y/n and chris are on holiday together

yourusername added to their story

yourusername

liked by arthurnhill, mollymae, chrismd10 and 723,567 others

tagged: chrismd10, arthurnfhill

yourusername: holiday dump ☀️

view all 8,678 comments

chrismd10: saved the best photo for last i see

—yourusername: 🙄 such a diva

user: happy looks so good on her

user: arthur and chris look so cute in the second slide !

mollymae: my beautiful girl 💕

arthurnhill: look at that handsome gentleman in the second photo

—yourusername: obviously you are talking about @chrismd10

—chrismd10: facts !!

user: the photo of chris !! he’s so fit

user: y/n and chris i need them to happen

chrismd10

liked by yourusername, georgeclarkeey, theburntchip and 168,678 others

tagged: yourusername

chrismd10: went on a holiday and took some snaps

view all 578 comments

georgeclarkeey: oh i see how it is christopher

user: not chris only positing photos on y/n and himself 😂

—user: exactly! It’s not like we knew he was also with the boys

yoursuername: this is just more proof hat I’m your favourite

—chrismd10: i never said that

user: mate y/n is looking so good in that pic !

user: i need to know what chris’s chat is like, cause how has he pulled this off

arthurnfhill: remind me to not invite you to any future boys trips after this appalling treatment

savinggracepod

liked by gkbarry_, taliamar, yourusername and 5,678 others

tagged: yourusername

savinggracepod: pop princess @yourusername stopped by the pod, episode is out now so go give it a listen ✨

view all 678 comments

yourusername: had so much fun ! thanks for having me lovely 💕

—gkbarry_: come back any time babes

user: wait y/n sense of humour is actually amazing !

user: did anyone see how red y/n turned when grace brought up chris ?!

—user: yes, she couldn’t stop smiling while talking about them being “ friends “

taliamar: see boys she’s funny as well as being a pretty face

—yourusername: why do you hate me !

user: not talia trying to find y/n a boyfriend in the comments 😂

—user: i know a football youtuber that might be interested

tag list: @arthurhillmastermind @melancholicandmessy @cinnvmonrolls @misplacedxeggos @ooostarwarsfandom501st @theresglitteronthefloor @gvf23

#chrismd #chrismd imagine #chrismd x reader #arthur hill #arthur tv #george clarkey #british youtubers

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buddierecs · 8 months ago

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mutual pining buddie fics pt2

all explicit rating - 18+ only!!!! make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

i like you so much (it's kinda gross) by: aficatyourfingerstips, brewrosemilk "eddie is an MMA fighter and buck thirsts on twitter" word count: 10k important tags: celebrity au, social media, texting, sexting breathe out now and we fall back in by: withoutthetiger "set during the summer after 5b, buck and eddie are complete idiots (affectionate) while they pretend to be in love and then realize they haven't been pretending at all. It's just a lot of fake dating, written for the prompt "you could never hurt me." word count: 32k important tags: fake dating, friends to lovers, touching, first dates, first kiss, grinding, hand jobs, blow jobs, anal sex stupid people by: brewrosemilk "new in los angeles, and having recently admitted to himself that he's gay, eddie figures that hiring a sex worker might be a good way to keep his private life cut off from his job and his son. a way to keep things from becoming too complicated. it works. for a while." word count: 160k important tags: different first meetings au, sex worker!evan buckley, friends with benefits, friends to lovers, multimedia, blow jobs, rough sex, praise kink, come slut!evan buckely, light dom!sub, phone sex, riding if i need you to rearrange my particles - i will for you by: dylaesthetics "buck joins a support app for first responders and matches with a firefighter who has ptsd and a kid who likes giraffes, apparently." word count: 45k important tags: secret identity, texting, ptsd, anxiety, panic attacks, sexuality crisis, sexting, masturbation, getting together to feel the need of your touch by: honestlydarkprincess "the one where buck is touchstarved and desperate for eddie. they fuck but it's also really sweet." word count: 7.5k important tags: light dom/sub, hurt/comfort, oral sex, anal sex, barebacking, evan buckley has a praise kink, dom!eddie diaz, sub!evan buckley, porn with feelings

while we do what lovers do by: withoutthetiger "set during s3/s4, featuring a lot of sex and angst and love and beautiful idiots (affectionate) who could always save themselves some trouble if they had one thoroughly honest conversation." word count: 27k important tags: first with benefits, hurt/comfort, feelings realisation, idiots in love, porn with feelings, hand jobs, blow jobs, rimming, anal sex doin' something unholy by: bekkachaos "eddie makes a tiktok account so he can monitor chris' activity on the app, and he stumbles across buck’s profile. It’s a lot of silly trends, a couple with chris (previously eddie approved), but when he scrolls to the newest video it’s one of those transition thirst traps and oh yeah, eddie’s been sucked in, hard." word count: 7.4k important tags: tik tok, feelings realisation, getting together, masturbation, voyeurism

cause in my head i do everything right / when you call i'll forgive and not fight by: aficatyourfingertips, eddiediazisascorpio "the one where buck and eddie are separated." word count: 31k important tags: married but separated!buddie, different first meeting au, miscommunication, eventual happy ending, angst, anal sex, oral sex, angry sex, mutual masturbation, phone sex

- pt 1 of explicit mutual pining fics - mature rating mutual pining fics - general audience rating mutual pining fics

#turns out there is a word limit so here is the part two #911 abc #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buck x eddie #911 fandom #911 show #buck x eddie fic #ao3 #ao3 link #ao3feed #buddie smut #buddie fic #buddie recommendations #buddie fics #buck x eddie smut #mutual pining fics #mutual pining #evan buck buckley

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bidisasterevankinard · 7 months ago

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Au where Tommy left the army only in 2015(honorably discharged) and knew Eddie since the army. More over it's him who was the pilot in this helicopter that went down. During season 5, Tommy is the only one who Eddie can reach BUT because Tommy was in 48 shift it happens after Eddie's breakdown (Eddie thinks Tommy might be dead too when Tommy doesn't answer). Eddie sleeps when Tommy calls him back, but Buck answers and explains to Tommy without much details what Eddie needed. Tommy says what he would be really happy to see Eddie and share some his PTSD problems and ways to cope. So Buck and Tommy plans the surprise meeting after Eddie sees Charlie. Eddie ofc super happy to see another person he saved alive and he and Tommy actually were pretty good friends, but different states led to less and less communication until they stop and then Eddie just forgot he actually leaves in one city with Tommy since 2019. They start to hang out. Tommy definitely has good influence on Eddie. They work out, have sparings, talk about their share trauma and trauma from the army only army person can get and Buck happy to see Eddie thrive, but he also can't understand his fellings to Tommy, especially because he still in love with Taylor, right? Then why seeing Tommy is more interesting and exciting? Why Tommy makes him blush like Taylor never did? Why he feels so strange about this man?

And then 5x17 happens. Taylor's betrayl happens. Buck lives with Eddie and he sees Tommy more and Tommy makes some comment how Buck prefers couch in this house over warm bed with pretty girlfriend and Buck has to explain everything and Tommy just looks at him like 🥺 "Evan, do you really want to continue live with and try to build a life with the person you can't trust?" Buck comes home and breaks it with Taylor. When she moves out he texts Tommy

Do you want some beer and movies?

I'll be there in 30

Then season 6. Buck's searching for happiness and "perfect couch". Tommy, Buck and Eddie strike friendship and dynamic with all three of them and Tommy with Diaz boys mock Buck about the couch. And when Buck explains it all Tommy looks at him with longing so huge,Chris, aka the only person with brain cells, do not understand how Buck can't see. At home he finds out his dad can't see it too, so Chris understands he will be the only matchmaker.During the Christmas in Diaz house, he successfully catch bucktommy under mistletoe, and he absolutely excited to see Buck's expression. But Buck can't understand what it all means? Is he attracted to Tommy? Does he likes Tommy romantically? Does he even attracted to men? Answers about attraction he founds quickly. But he's scared to touch his attraction to Tommy because he likes their friendship, because he made an idiot about himself when they only met and he's happy Tommy gave him second chance

So it goes like that till lightning strikes. Tommy is absolutely devastated. But Buck comes back ofc, yet, Tommy who's scared to open himself only to be heartbroken step by step distance himself from Buck because he doesn't want to be heartbroken over the man he can't have. Buck is sad when with all the people around him keeping him out of his head, the one who's company he actually wants seems like lost his interest in Buck. They ofc meet at Diaz house and when they work out at Tommy's, but Tommy never hangs out just with him, only if Eddie is around.

That moment Buck meets Natalia and he sees her as the answer he can have about his death and what it means. Because of dated with Natalia and Eddie's relationship with Marisol, Buck and Tommy hadn't seen each other for months. They meet again during cruise ship disaster as Tommy now firefighter pilot and Eddie ofc called him. Buck is absolutely smitten as time never moved and he wants to hang out with Tommy again, but Tommy keeps his distance. They hang out rarely again when Eddie breaks up with Marisol and Chris goes to Texas to help Eddie stay saint and find his way to grief Shannon. It goes like that, and Buck tries hard to make Tommy his friend again, but Tommy tries hard to resist him till Buck says fuck it. i lost him anyway and kisses him.

Just one chance, Tommy please. I can't stop thinking about you since you came to my life two years ago

Tommy can't say no to him

#this post run away from me #bucktommy #platonic buddie #platonic eddietommy #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 #evan buck buckley #911 abc #tommy kinard #christopher diaz #tevan #kinley #kinkley #fic idea #i will have new wip won't i?

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total-drama-brainrot · 8 months ago

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Alenoah AU, where Noah says this in London instead:

Owen: "Why don't you like Al? He's great!"

Noah: "I like Alejandro and I agree that he's great, but I still don't trust the guy."

Owen: "Why?"

Noah: "I have my personal reasons... One of them being that I don't like how he treats you, Owen... So, please be careful from now on..."

Owen: "Okay, Noah... You do have a point."

How would Alejandro react to Noah liking him, but not truly trusting him? 😲

See your first mistake is assuming Noah would ever give up an oppertunity to shit-talk someone. /j

But for real, if Noah did clarify that he doesn't dislike Alejandro but does distrust him, I can't see things playing out too differently from canon - save for Alejandro being a bit less openly hostile towards him post-challenge. Noah would still be eliminated, because having a teammate who distrusts him doesn't align with Alejandro's game plan.

Especially if Noah divulges why he doesn't trust Alejandro. If Noah tries to out the fact that Alejandro isn't as altruistic as he wants to appear, that makes Noah himself a direct threat to Alejandro's plans and schemes. Again, he'd be eliminated as soon as possible.

Regardless of any potential feelings between the two, Alejandro can and would always prioritise the competition over any budding relationship he has with Noah... at least in London. Further on in the competition, if/when the two of them have gotten to know each other better (and when mutual feelings have had time to grow and develop) it's a different story.

It would, however, mean there's a lot less bad blood between the two post series. At least on Alejandro's end. If anything, he'd probably have a smidge of respect for Noah, since he's one of the few people who had caught on to Alejandro's false geniality pre-merge and/or pre-elimination.

Meanwhile Noah would still be justifyably salty that Alejandro got him eliminated, but I imagine he'd pin most of the blame on himself. After all, it was his big mouth that once again dropped him into hot water with his team. Plus, in this scenario, Noah admits that he does like Alejandro, so even considering his elimination I doubt Noah would be too upset with Alejandro himself.

So, in the case of this hypothetical AU, I'd suggest that the main meat of the story here would be post-World Tour, which plays out canonically (or as close to canonically as you'd like). Alejandro gets Drama Machine'd, and Noah - as one of the few people in the cast who doesn't actively hate Alejandro - questions his whereabouts when he fails to show up on the cruise boat the Gen 1 cast are seen on at the beginning of RotI.

He's likely the only person to do so since, barring Heather, Noah's one of the select few who Alejandro didn't royally fuck over. Not directly, at least. And Heather's too preoccupied with the loss of her million to think about Alejandro's wellbeing. And Chris tells him straight; the robot on the cruise ship? Alejandro's chilling in there, healing from the lava burns in almost complete isolation.

Noah is understandably horrified. He's even more horrified when Chris reveals that the Burromuertos signed over custodial rights for Alejandro and disowned him, so Chris is full within his legal rights to keep Alejandro in the Drama Machine for however long he deems fit. Unfortunately, he's also sworn to secrecy about the whole deal; Chris can't have Alejandro's situation reaching the press, it'd be bad for the show's publicity. (Add some legal jargon here, or something about non-disclosure agreements being in the casts' contracts, or whatever.)

But he can't just leave alejandro to suffer in an indefinite mechanical imprisonment. So Noah bargains his way back into his old position as a PA, if only to keep tabs on Alejandro's wellbeing.

Something something you end up with one of those Assistant Noah x Drama Machine Alejandro AUs, which eventually evolves into a "Noah works as an assistant on All-stars" AU, or whatever.

#Noah WOULD cite Alejandro's blatant dislike of Owen as a reason not to trust him though you're right about that.#Probably took this in a whole different direction to what anon intended. My bad.#I really can't see Alejandro keeping Noah around in London unless Noah's somehow stopped from making ANY sort of comment.#Noah calls him an eel? Eliminated. Noah points out his flimsy mask? Eliminated. Noah even hints that Alejandro's untrustworthy? Eliminated.#You can really see where I lost steam on this one.#total drama #td alejandro #td noah #alenoah #others' ideas #replies #💡 anon

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epicbuddieficrecs · 7 months ago

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Weekly Recap | July 15th-21st 2024

I have a week off of work, woohoo! This week I mostly read all of my favourite WIPs that updated multiple times, thank you all for keeping me well fed 😎

Complete

is there some place where we can go right now? (i don't think that it can wait) by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Established Buddie, Bar Sex, PWP | 2K | Explicit): Buck, Eddie, and the inside of a bar bathroom

you call me pretty little thing by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Established Buddie, Panty Kink, PWP | Explicit): “Buck,” Eddie breathes after a moment. “Are you wearing—?” Buck nips at Eddie’s slack mouth and says coyly, “Why don’t you see for yourself?” Eddie, it seems, doesn’t need to be told twice. He shoves Buck off his lap, tearing his sweatpants down his hips to reveal the tiny, pink lace panties Buck has on beneath them.

looking for something dumb to do by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Buddie Wedding, PWP | 4K | Explicit): It’s also not unusual that the app bay is almost empty when they walk inside, save for one engine parked along the side. What is unusual is the rows of white folding chairs facing the back wall. And the archway adorned with greenery and pale pink blossoms set up beneath the loft. And all of their friends milling about the app bay, dressed up like… Like they’re attending a wedding.

Hell or High Water by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (4x04: What's Your Grievance, PWP, First Time | 5K | Explicit): That’s Buck’s cue to put a stop to this before it crosses a line they can’t come back from. Before he says something or does something that means Eddie will never touch him or smile at him or let him into his home again. Buck breaks things; that’s what he does. And he’s tried so hard not to break this.

🔥 my man says he loves me (never says he loves me not) by colonoscopys/ @colonoscopys (Post-S7, Identity Porn | 9K | General): It’s the summer after Eddie blows his life up that he realizes he kinda wants to do it again. He’s looking at the TV, watching some shitty, fuzzy screen show that Buck favored on his last shift, and letting sleep kinda wash in and wash out. There’s an ad after a while. “Are you struggling with being in love with your best friend too?” The man asks. “You should sign up for inlovewithmybestfriendandgoingtodie.com. A support group dedicated to people in love with their best friend, inlovewithmybestfriendandgoingtodie.com is a great way to learn how to cope and survive when you’re in love with someone you’ll never have!” Eddie gapes at the screen.

WIP

🔥 Held Up a Lightning Rod (Wonder Why I'm Struck) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Not A Firefighter Eddie, Sugar Baby Buck | 17/22 | 88K | Explicit): When Eddie Diaz stumbles his way into money, he finds himself one of the most eligible bachelors in Los Angeles - to his dismay. He needs a way to get people off his back without confessing his messy marital situation, and Shannon's still not answering his calls, so he caves to a friend's suggestion: hire someone to pretend to be his partner. Enter Evan "Buck" Buckley: sugar baby, fire fighter, and the man about to turn Eddie's world upside down.

🔥 Long Death by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7, Vampire AU | 8/12 | 33K | Explicit): In the summer of 2024, a never before seen form of vampirism breaks out in Los Angeles. Just as Eddie is about to get his son back. Six months later, Buck's life is permanently changed.

drift past the flowers. by dylaesthetics (Post-S6, (Un)requited Love | 6/12 | 18K | Teen): OR Buck and Natalia get engaged, and Eddie flees the state about it. A petty email correspondence ensues.

🔥loves a game, wanna play? by 42hrb/ @exhuastedpigeon (Post-S7, Love Island AU | 6/13 | 26K | Mature): In the aftermath of Chris leaving for the summer, Buck convinces Eddie they should apply for Love Island together.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, Divergent Post-S6 | 131/? | 413K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

🔥 If You Can Make the Music by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, | 4/5 | 11K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 5 (Seaside): A year after a whirlwind two week love affair with bartender Buck in Galveston, Texas, Eddie Diaz finds himself coincidentally relocating to the area. But when he attempts to reconnect with Buck, he's in for an unfortunate surprise. (Part 3 of Coma-Verse)

#epic buddie fic rec #buddie fic rec #buddie fanfic #buddie fic #buddie fanfiction #buddie

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kaciidubs · 2 years ago

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Camboy!SKZ Headcanons | Hyung Line

❣ Summary: What it would be like if the SKZ boys were camboys? An idea brought on by @onmykneesforchanlix ❣ ❣ Warnings: Camboy AU, kink discussion [daddy kink], sex toys ❣ ❣ Additional Tags: Slight crack energy, Chan is referred to as Chris, Changbin is a gym buff ❣ Maknae Line ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist ❣

Chris

His username would be something painfully simple, like cb97xx or xxWolfChanxx, he’s never escaping the early 2000’s username tropes, I’m sorry.

Started camming to save money for music tech, and he was gonna quit once he earned enough money but he slowly found himself getting hooked on the praise of thousands of unknown faces.

At first he didn’t show his face, keeping the content to shoulders and below, but one night he gets up to turn the stream off and they catch a glimpse of his lips and there’s a rapid fire of tips flooding in;

Would give anything to have those lips on me

What the fuck what the fuck??? Those lips?? So biteable??

Bubblegum pink, new favorite color

From then on, he kept his camera at an angle just high enough to keep his lips in frame.

Definitely finds himself pandering to the daddy kink side of the internet and ends up developing the kink for himself [this is a lie, he knows he’s had it since before the cam boy streams, but who really needs to know that?].

Loves when his fans comment on how good his hands look bc he doesn’t find them appealing himself, but if hundreds of people are begging him to choke them, how could he deny it?

Paints his nails by the recommendation of his subscribers each month, and it turns him on even more when he’s camming and jerking off with his freshly dried polish.

Wants to grow his community and isn’t shy about collaborations with other creators because baby boy is just a social butterfly - no matter if they’re clothed or naked in front of thousands.

Ultimately treats his lives like a genuine livestream, even if his dick is leaking precum in his fist.

Minho

First off; username is leeknowswho, convince me otherwise - man did not care about his username in the slightest

Only made an account to support his other streaming friend, quokkasungie

But when he saw the money he was raking in, he decided to throw his hat into the ring because “Getting off in front of a camera? How hard can it be?”

Spoiler alert - very.

Extremely, when you don’t even use a webcam.

The first few streams were experimental, a black screen with the subtle sound of him jerking off and breathing into the mic - that is, until he read out a chat asking for a description.

“What? So needy you can’t imagine it for yourself?”

Apparently the chatter liked that, and so did a grand number of people after that on his next stream.

Thus, the leeknowswho degradation corner was born, and it’s been a hit for two years and growing.

Constantly teases his viewers, toying with them that maybe one day he’ll turn on his camera, and even going as far as setting a donation goal for him to do so - but the limit is never reached since he often takes part of the money to donate to charities.

“You’d rather see my dick than an organization help get stray kittens off the streets? Yet I’m the fucked up one?”

Sometimes he goes live and doesn’t even jerk off, just doing an asmr stream teasing and degrading and toying with his fans, getting a kick out of the ones actively using his voice to get themselves off.

He’s a menace but the people love him.

Changbin

BinnieDwekki or Dwekkisgym, I really can’t decide but he definitely gives off cute username vibes.

Genuinely wanted to use the platform as a way to document his growth from working out, but of course using a camboy website probably wasn’t the way to go about it.

Has a whole room for his setup - though in reality it’s just his in-home workout room, but who really needs to know the truth - and takes pride in showing off his whole body.

He worked hard for those muscles, why wouldn’t he want to flex in every angle?!

Blushes at the chat messages where people say they want him to choke him with his biceps, or squeeze their head between his thighs until they pop like a watermelon.

Blushes even more at the chats praising his physique and wondering how someone with such a cute face could have such a killer body.

The first time he pulled his dick out on stream was when he was showcasing some of the workouts he does on the daily; the adrenaline and built up energy from his preworkout giving the chat a glorious reveal of the thick outline in his compression shorts.

Fuck choking me with your arms, choke me out on your cock

There wasn’t much left to the imagination, and with the addition of that chat message he figured that maybe taking care of the problem on stream wouldn’t be a bad idea.

And boy, was it the best decision he’d ever made.

If his fans weren’t on board for the strained grunts and breathless groans from him working out on camera, then they definitely were for the dick that looked just as beefy as he was.

His version of being a camboy is probably the most wholesome out there, ranging from motivational talks and advice moments [while shirtless, of course] to being stark naked and jacking off after a live workout session.

Hyunjin

Another one who signed up with intent - and hear me out.

He wanted to use the money to help get him into art school, but after seeing his first major check after the span of a few months, he figured he could get on well without it.

Username is princehhj, he knows how to pander to his features which helped him grow a fanbase like it was nothing.

Has been camboying the longest out of the hyung line.

He also has a set for his streams, but it’s just a corner of his art studio where he has a cozy little couch where he can stretch out on [in more ways than one].

His streams usually involve toys of various types; silicon grinders, fleshlights, buttplugs, dildos - his collection isn’t one to joke about, only using his hand got boring after the first week of streaming.

Most of the time he doesn’t even have to be doing anything explicit, simply sitting there with his pretty black hair tied back into a ponytail, a bottle of lube and a toy or two sitting right beside him is enough for the donations to come rolling in.

His favorite toy to use is his tenga egg - the stretchy plastic egg fits perfectly in his palm and doesn’t take too much concentration to use, which makes it easier for him to read his chat and reply as if he’s not touching himself.

Aside from the toys, however, he may also have one or two sets of lingerie that he brings out on milestone streams as a treat to the scream [and himself]. Nothing too wild, just your simple lace panty set and garters, and the chat goes wild for it.

Can you truly blame them though? He’s the prettiest prince out there.

❣ Any type of feedback is appreciated! Whether it be a simple like, reblog, or keyboard smash and the most essay-like comment, feel free to share your thoughts. ❣

#skz fanfic #skz smut #camboy au #stray kids headcanons #bang chan smut #lee know smut #changbin smut #hyunjin smut #kacii's masterlist #stray kids imagines #Camboy!SKZ

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schrijverr · 3 days ago

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I Didn’t Mean to Say I Do, but I Do. I Do. 43

Chapter 43 out of 50

Secret marriage of convenience buddie slow burn AU, where Buck and Eddie have been married for years so Buck could adopt Chris and no one at the 118 knows.

In this chapter, Eddie begins to work through his internalized homophobia with Bosko, unsure what if he can go home. He doesn’t know how. Buck is trying to keep Chris’s spirits up as they wait for him to find peace with himself and find his way back. To just talk to Buck again.

On AO3.

Ships: Buddie

Warnings: internalized homophobia, insecurity

~~~

Chapter 43: The First Step Is Admitting It

Bosko sits with Eddie as he cries for the life he wants and partially has, but that was never his to keep. It feels like he’s crying for hours. His head hurts and his eyes are aching and puffy. It’s very not charming and he’s glad he doesn’t have to go into work tomorrow, because he’s not sure how to explain the traces of tears that are bound to still be visible then.

She softly tells him that it’s okay, that he is allowed to love Buck, that he’s not failing him or anything else he’s internalized.

“I know it doesn’t feel like it, because I didn’t think so either, but you’re going to be okay. You’re good too. You’re allowed to feel all the things people told you you’re not supposed to. You’re allowed to exist, Eddie. You’re allowed to be you,” she says intently as she shakes him lightly to make her sure her words sink in.

It’s the first time anyone has ever told him that so bluntly, he thinks. Buck made him feel like that, Chris too, but no one else ever did. Papi doesn’t like who he is, mom certainly doesn’t and he’s pretty sure Shannon stopped liking him the moment she got to know him better, but by then it was already too late.

Eddie has felt shame for as long as he can remember. It clings to him like a second skin and trying to believe what Bosko is saying, feels like skinning himself.

He’s a mess.

At some point, he stops crying, just retreats into himself. Bosko leads him to the couch and he curls into himself, while she makes them some tea. Mayo still hates his fucking guts (and he can’t blame her), but Butter nudges his arm until he lets him sit on his lap, cuddling into him as he mindlessly buries his hands in his fur.

Bosko comes back with two mugs, handing one to Eddie, before plopping down next to him on the couch. He takes it with a mumbled thanks, feeling a bit embarrassed about his breakdown. She must notice, because she says: “If it makes you feel any better, I cried all over Ronnie and he’s my Captain.”

Eddie shudders at the thought of ever letting Bobby see more than a glimpse of this side of him. He could have gone to the others maybe, but Chimney truly can’t keep a secret to save his life and Hen… Well, she’s nice and he trusts her. Maybe he could have gone to Hen, but she would have tried to help and he couldn’t have accepted that. Plus, she is just as nosy as Chimney is. They all are, honestly.

He loves them, but this would not have stayed personal. The only person he would have trusted is Buck and he can’t exactly go to Buck about this, now can he?

“I’m glad you’re here,” he says, suddenly overcome by gratitude. “I know I’ve been a dick, so thanks for still being here.”

“Yeah, you are a bit of a dick, but I like you anyway,” Bosko says with a smile. “And Butter likes you, so you’ve been vouched for.”

“Mayo hates me, though,” Eddie points out, though he feels slightly better about it anyway.

“Mayo hates everybody,” Bosko laughs and Eddie manages to laugh too.

They drink their tea in silence, both letting the comfortable moment wash over them. After a while, Bosko breaks the silence by asking: “So, I know bits and pieces, but how did you come to marry Buck when you’ve only just realized you love him and kind of spiraled about it? Wouldn’t you have spiraled before?”

“I mean, I guess I should have, but it was never like that,” Eddie sighs. “I always swatted the thought away, because it wasn’t like that, I wasn’t like that. People who commented didn’t have the whole story anyway and I’m not homophobic, why should I care what people think even if they’re wrong, you know?”

Bosko snorts, then says: “Sorry, too soon?”

Somehow, it’s kind of comforting, so he grins: “Nah, not too soon.”

“Good, because that is hilarious, Diaz,” Bosko laughs.

“Yeah, yeah, laugh at my pain,” Eddie faux-complains.

“I’m allowed, I put up with your shit,” she informs him happily. “Anyway, you never answered the first part. How did you two end up married? With a kid, no less.”

And Eddie just tells her. He’s been struggling with thinking about how the two of them came together, didn’t even want to hear about it, but now it comes pouring out. He’s let himself look his past in the eyes, openly and honestly, has let himself think about Buck and has acknowledged that he loves him. He said it out loud and there has only been kindness in return, even if it’s mixed in with Bosko laughing at him.

So, he tells her about a young teen desperate to prove something, though he never knew why. How that got a girl pregnant and how that girl always knew he didn’t love her and how he ran instead of trying to love her, because on some level he knew that too. How they divorced and how she moved on and how he was secretly glad, but also didn’t want to face it, until he was forced to face it, because she ran just like he did.

He tells her how he came face to face with Buck and for the first time, how it felt like someone believed in him, like he knew what he was doing. How Buck is his first friend, his first actual friend. One, who stayed by his side and didn’t run when it would have been easier. How he only got closer and closer, until Eddie didn’t know how to live without him.

As he talks, Bosko listens closely, nodding along and making noises to show she’s still listening.

The mood drops as he finishes off: “So, yeah, uhm, that’s how we got here. And now I fucked it up and he probably hates me and I’d be lucky if he even wants to be my coworker anymore. I’m gonna have to leave the 118 when he is good to work again. Think the 136 wants me back?”

“Don’t be an idiot,” Bosko says, swatting at him lightly.

“What?” Eddie exclaims. “I’m not being an idiot. Didn’t you hear what I just told you? I’ve been creepily in love with him and forcing him to stay married to me for years and now I’ve abandoned him for weeks. Of course he hates me now.”

“He didn’t want to divorce you, dumbass. The two of you literally fought because he didn’t want to divorce you and he’s picked you over and over again. Didn’t you just say he always stayed by your side and didn’t run even if it would have been easier?” she reminds him. “You’ve been going through something, figuring yourself out is fucking hard. If you tell him, he’ll get it. You two can work through this.”

“Then I have to tell him, I can never do that,” Eddie immediately says.

“Because then he’ll know you were ‘creepily in love with him and forcing him to stay married to you’?” she checks, looking mightily unimpressed.

“Yeah! Exactly.”

“Eddie, it is homophobic to say that.”

“No, it’s not,” Eddie frowns. “It’s true that it’s creepy to be close to someone when you have a crush on them and think things about them while they don’t know.”

Bosko pinches her nose and curses under her breath, before straightening herself back out and looking at Eddie again. “Okay, let me phrase it like this; was it creepy for Chimney to befriend Maddie, even though he liked her?”

“I mean, I guess not, but that’s different, he didn’t marry her.”

“Forget about the being married for a second,” Bosko groans. “You and Buck are friends, right?” He nods. “You got married as friends and you’ve only ever acted as friends, correct?” He nods again. “And you’ve never made an advance on Buck that was unwelcome, just thought about how great he was and how you wanted to kiss him and shit.”

“Don’t say it like that.” Eddie blushes heavily. “And of course not! I don’t want to do anything he doesn’t want me to.”

“Then pray tell, how it is creepy that you are friends with a guy, who wants to be your friend, by the way, and how that is any different from Chimney and Maddie?” Bosko asks.

Eddie thinks about it for a moment, then realization dawns on him: “Oh my god, it was homophobic.”

“Thank you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Thanks,” Bosko repeats, this time less ‘I told you so’ about it. “Homophobia is a bitch, internalized homophobia especially. It’s gonna take a while until you can stop that.”

“Internalized homophobia?” Eddie says confused. She used the term before, but he’d been focused on other things then. Now, it registers and he has no clue what she means by it.

“Oh shit, you truly are a baby-baby gay,” Bosko says, slightly horrified. Eddie also doesn’t know what that means, so she spends some time explaining both terms to him, as well as expanding on internalized homophobia with some examples about her own life.

Eddie feels uncomfortably seen by her and it begins to settle in what it means for him, now that he has accepted he loves Buck. Now that he’s no longer running. The things he has to get used to and work through.

“I don’t think I’m ready to go home yet,” he confesses softly. “I- I can’t- I need to process all this, before I can face him.”

“Okay,” Bosko nods simply.

“Okay?” Eddie repeats, unsure if he heard right. He expected her to push back, push him to face Buck like she’s done for most of the evening.

“Yeah, okay,” she confirms. “Processing all this can be a lot and with your complicated mess of feelings and life, I’m not going to force you to live a domestic life with your crush when doing that pushed you to start punching people. You can stay on my couch until you’re ready.”

“Thank you so much,” Eddie says gratefully, so relieved she is going to let him stay.

She hold up her finger, then says: “But, only if you call him. You got to at least tell him that you’re okay and working through stuff. You don’t have to specify what, but talk to him.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” A phone call still feels impossible, but Buck deserves more from Eddie. He deserves to have Eddie try. For them. For their family.

He can break his own heart to let Buck go, but he can’t let himself break Chris’s. Chris deserves to have his daddy and his papi in his life. He isn’t going to fuck that up. He can be a good father. He can be… gay and a good father.

Bosko looks at the clock and says: “Though maybe not tonight. It’s already 2:00 AM. Are you not exhausted? How long have you been awake?”

“Uh, around lunch,” Eddie replies, starting to feel the exhaustion now that she mentions it.

“Bedtime it is then. Get your ass off this couch so I can put some bedding on it. Do you want to borrow a shirt to sleep in? No offense, but you kind of reek.”

“That would be nice,” Eddie says sheepishly. He came her straight after that fight and never changed or showered. It is pretty disgusting.

Bosko ends up herding him into her bathroom, lending him some of her boxers and a shirt, before telling him to not use her conditioner, because it’s expensive. Eddie has never used conditioner in his life, so that’s easy enough.

While he showers, she makes up the couch into a makeshift bed. It’s not as comfortable as his own couch, but it will have to do. So he thanks her before they bid each other goodnight.

He tosses and turns the whole night, trying to figure out what to say tomorrow, until he finally falls into a fitful sleep.

The next morning, his own nerves wake him. Again, Bosko is still asleep and he is glad for that as he sneaks onto the balcony. Butter follows him, settling on his lap when he takes a seat. His purrs soothe Eddie as he gets out his phone with shaky hands, before pressing call.

“Eddie? Oh my god, are you okay? Where are you?” Buck greets him as he picks up, sounding relieved, but also like he doesn’t fully believe it’s real.

Guilt floods Eddie’s system at the words. He should have never doubted Buck’s ability to be worried about him. “I’m okay. I’m at Bosko’s place,” he answers quietly, subdued.

“Bosko’s place?” Buck repeats, a weird tinge to his voice.

“Uh, yeah, I worked with her at the 136? You met her at the shield ceremony,” Eddie reminds him.

“I know who she is,” Buck snaps, the anger he is right to feel coming through now. “I’m just trying to figure out what’s so important about going there that you couldn’t come home or even pick up your fucking phone.”

Eddie winces, he deserves that. “I’ve been running, kind of.”

“Running? From what? Should I be worried here?” Buck asks, still pissed off, but now more in the worried territory again and slightly more calm.

“Uhm, I- I don’t think so? I just-” Eddie makes a frustrated noise. This is not how he wanted this conversation to go. “I’ve been working through some things. Well, I need to work through some things, because I had been working through them, but not in a great way and-”

“Eddie, slow down,” Buck cuts him off. He’s been so relieved Eddie called, then worried, then pissed off and now he’s worried once more. Eddie isn’t the rambler, Buck is. Right now, Buck needs to know what’s happening, needs to know what the problem is, so he can fix it. So, he needs Eddie to be calm and focus. “Tell me slowly; what’s been going on,” he instructs. Over the line, he can hear Eddie take a deep breath.

Butter is purring loudly with how nice Eddie’s stressed petting is. It’s nice, makes him feel like he’s not as much of a monster as he thinks. That helps him swallows his nerves, before he confesses: “I’ve been street fighting.”

“What,” Buck chokes. Out of everything, this was pretty low on his list of possibilities, so low, it wasn’t even on there to begin with.

“It was just a friendly thing at first to cope with the stress, but, uhm, then it got out of hand and it- it got bad, Buck. I was scared to go home,” his voice is small and he’s ashamed of it, but here, alone on this balcony with only Buck to hear, he lets himself feel scared and small. He’s safe. Buck might be mad at him, but he knew the second he heard his voice that he was safe.

Indeed, Buck doesn’t disappoint, asking: “And are you okay where you are now?”

“Yeah, Bosko caught me at one of my fights, I- I realized I fucked up. She offered up her couch while I sort myself out. I’m quitting, so I, uh- I’m kind of staying here now. While I do that.”

“You’re not coming home?” Buck asks and Eddie wants to crawl into the feeling he gets when Buck says the word ‘home’ and stay there forever, but also crawl out of his own skin at the disappointment in Buck’s voice.

“Not yet, no. I’m sorry. I- I know I should have been home, I know I haven’t been, but I- I don’t know how to be home right now.” To his horror tears start to form in his eyes. His first instinct is to push them down, but then he remembers where that got him, so he lets them flow. Silently, they drip down his face.

“Do you- do you know when you’re going to be ready to be home again?” There is something fragile in Buck’s voice too.

“Uhm, no,” Eddie says, because he doesn’t. It feels like the wrong answer, it feels like he should be going home right now and embracing Buck and begging on his knees to be forgiven, to be loved, but that is exactly what he can’t do. He’s ruined enough, he can’t ruin it more by dumping this all on Buck before he figures himself out. Before he’s safe.

“Chris misses you,” Buck tells him and it doesn’t feel like a change of topic, but like an attempt to persuade him.

“Yeah, I- I heard your voicemail,” Eddie replies, voice thick. He feels horrible about not seeing Chris, about abandoning him too.

“Oh…” Buck is quiet for a moment. “Can you not see Chris or can you just not come home?” The underlying ‘can you just not see me’ hangs unspoken in the air between them. “Maybe you can pick him up for school tomorrow? Before your shift.”

Eddie is still scared about doing something to hurt either of them, but it also feels like he released some of the pressure by talking about it. Butter isn’t scared of him. He hasn’t hurt this fragile creature. He’s been gentle. Besides, he’s no longer angry, he’s just exhausted. Exhausted and confused and not ready. He’s just not ready.

However, just being not ready isn’t a good enough excuse. He’s never been ready to care for Chris and he has already failed so many times, but by god has he always tried and like hell is he going to stop trying now. So with a hoarse voice, he says: “Yeah, yeah, I can do that.”

“Good, good. He’ll be thrilled to hear that,” Buck says and Eddie can picture the wobbly smile that’s on his face. He wishes he could make it better, but he doesn’t know how. Buck is the one who is good at fixing things, Eddie only breaks them. “Want me to wake him so you can talk to him?”

“No. Uhm, no, it’s okay. He needs his rest and I- I’ll see him tomorrow,” Eddie says. He feels like a mess, he doesn’t want Chris to see this part of him. He needs time to pull himself back together.

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Buck agrees, while clearly disagreeing. “What do you want me to tell him? He needs some sort of explanation, he knows you’re not working.”

They talk a little more about the logistics of it all. It’s stilted and uncomfortable, a lot is unspoken between them. Eddie feels a longing to say more, but he can’t bring himself to do so and Buck probably knows that there is more. It’s like there is glass between them. Eddie hates feeling so distant from Buck, but he doesn’t know how to bridge it.

When he hangs up, he feels vaguely hollow. He knows he did the right thing by calling and that it worked out in the end, but a small selfish part of him wished Buck had been more angry, instead of this quiet, sad understanding that Eddie doesn’t fully grasp. It feels uncomfortable to not understand him, he’s always understood Buck. It’s one of the many things he has broken.

He has no clue how he’s going to come back, if he can even come back to this family he had, the one with Chris and Buck. But that is something for him to figure out. It feels like a new start and he doesn’t know of what yet. It’s scary, but also a little exciting.

The following two weeks continue on in this weird limbo.

Buck explains to Chris that Eddie is helping out his friend, like Buck had to help out tía Maddie, so he can’t be home as much as they want him to. Chris is clearly not very pleased with it, but he lights up when Buck tells him Eddie will be bringing him to school.

He doesn’t see Eddie when that happens, since he’s in the kitchen, while Chris goes to meet Eddie at the door. It absolutely sucks to know Eddie is so close, but not being able to see him or talk to him. Not being able to assess what’s wrong.

Eddie needs space for figure himself out. Space away from Buck. It’s tearing him up inside, but he puts on a brave face and manages. Eddie is clearly going through something, he heard that much in his voice, and it’s something Buck can’t help him with. It’s going to be something he has to get used to when this all ends, might as well start now, even if his heart tears itself apart over it.

Hen texts him asking if it all worked out and he texts her that it’s all okay, Eddie just had a flat tire and they’re good now. Neither of them feel like letting the team in on this. Buck might not have all the details, but it feels private, sensitive. He understands not wanting the 118 nosing about while having to work with them each day. Buck is even a little glad he’s not back at work yet now that this is looming over him.

So, yeah, Buck manages. He hands the phone over to Chris at night so daddy can be there for bedtime and stays in the kitchen when Eddie drops Chris off or comes to pick him up.

Meanwhile, Eddie is trying to figure himself out. To create a place for himself where he is at peace with who he is and where he stands in the world. Not fighting people is hard, but he and Bosko spar one time and it doesn’t feel out of control. It feels just nice. Like a work out would. Not like anything special.

Eddie goes to a gay club, kisses a guy and it feels great and like he wants to throw up. It’s right, but it’s wrong. He wants to do it again, feel something close to what he felt. But the guy is okay looking, yet not attractive to him. Not really. Not like Buck is…

He learns a bunch of new terms, like demisexual, which makes him feel at home. And he meets a bunch of queer people from all walks of life. Listens to stories that resonate deeply, allowing him to lose a bit of that anger and the shame. Allows him to let go of the idea that these feelings are something he has to control, something he has to beat into submission.

Beyond that, he briefly gets to meet Heather and Kelsy when they drop of Tubs and he and Bosko spend all night analyzing what their interactions were like and if they have faith in the relationship while Eddie falls in love with Tubs.

He finds peace with himself, releases the pressure that had been building inside him in different, healthier ways, until the urge to punch someone has dissipated. Until he feels safe again. Both for himself and for others.

However, finding peace with himself, doesn’t mean an answer to the Buck conundrum appears before him.

The time spend away from him only confirms what Eddie already knows; he is deeply in love with Buck and it’s not a fleeting thing. It’s not going to go away, not anytime soon at least. It lingers in every quiet moment and fills the space between his organs until it is everywhere and he doesn’t know how to be himself without it.

Bosko tells him he should just rip the band aid off and tell Buck, face the rejection or embrace the possibility that Buck might love him back. But Eddie isn’t so sure.

Having the rejection might help him move on, but it’s also too painful to even think about. If he never tells, Buck never has to know and maybe he can fix this and go back to how they used to be, learn to live with the torch he carries for Buck silently. Keep him close and never let him go.

It’s an utterly selfish thing to do and he knows it, but he wants to. He wants to keep Buck. Wants to keep his friend. His person. If he just gives himself more time, maybe he can work out a way to be forgiven. To make it right.

The idea that Buck might love him back is too ludicrous to Eddie to even consider.

As the second weekend comes closer, it becomes clear that Eddie isn’t coming home soon. Chris returns with a good grade for his project and Eddie congratulated him in the car much like Buck did when Chris got home. However, Chris doesn’t seem happy with it.

While the two of them eat dinner, Buck asks: “What’s wrong, Superman? An A might not be an A+ like you hoped, but it’s still incredible. You did really well. What got you so down?”

Chris shrugs and pushes the food on his plate around. “I thought that if I did well, daddy would come home to celebrate, but he’s working this weekend and staying with his friend.”

Buck’s heart breaks for Chris, but there isn’t much he can do. Eddie is working through something and that’s important too. Not to mention that he’s actually working, not running like before. He can’t change that for Chris, even if he wants to.

“That does suck, buddy, but we can still celebrate,” he says, trying to inject enough cheer to convince Chris. “What do you think about the two of us going to check out the pier this weekend? We can try to win some cool prizes, maybe win a big one to make daddy jealous for missing it.”

It’s not perfect, but Chris lights up at the idea. “Can we, papi?”

“Of course,” Buck smiles back. He might not be able to fix what is going on with Eddie, but he can fix this. Going to the pier together sounds like a great idea. A bit of fun, it’s just what they all need to get their minds off everything.

A/N:

wave emoji, wave emoji xp

Y’all I have discovered the glee of subjecting everyone to this, people calling me evil in the comments is fueling me >:3

#rr writing #secret marriage of convenience buddie au #the i do verse #9-1-1 #9 1 1 #9 1 1 show #9 1 1 fanfiction #911 #911 show #911 fanfic #buddie #buck x eddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #buckley diaz family #lena bosko #tw: insecurity #tw: internalized homophobia

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channieskies · 2 months ago

Text

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖁𝕴: 𝕽𝖊𝖘𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader, Jeong(Jung) Jaehyun x Reader (Fem/AFAB/Curvy/Plus sized)

Genre: Smut (eventual), Angst, Supernatural Romance, Urban Fantasy

AU: Supernatural AU, Vampire Au, Werewolf AU, Witch AU

Word count: 7627 [Reading time: 32 minutes]

Networks: @neverendingdreams-net & @mirohs-aurora-society

Synopsis: You deal with the aftermath of your sleepless night and Dr. Jay's. Chris and the boys find out who attacked Jeongin and Seungmin.

He was frozen in place, physically unable to run after you. The hold on his body only let up when the screen door slammed. His heart ached. He never meant to hurt you, but his fear made him incapable of doing anything more than a few kisses. What if he hurt you for real, or worse? He’d just have to carry the burden of hurting your feelings like this, over trying to go further and not being able to control himself. His body moved on autopilot from then on. He didn’t realize he had gotten in his truck and drove off in the direction of his shared home. His drive back home was filled with silence. He would usually ride with the windows down, blasting his favorite tunes, but there was nothing that could possibly match the mood he was in right now.

A.N: Please reblog and leave a comment to let me know how you feel. I'd love a little feedback. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it. Special thanks to @palindrome969 and @therhythmafterthesummer for reading over this for me. I could never thank you enough. Dividers by @saradika-graphics

Disclaimer: This story does not reflect the real lives or personalities of Stray Kids or NCT. I do not know them personally. This is purely a work of fiction.

Warnings: MINORS DNI! This post contains nsfw material. Please do not interact with it if you are under the age of 18. Do not translate or repost here or on other sites. This chapter contains use of explicit language.

You didn’t sleep for long. Your body seemed like it was decidedly against you getting any amount of sleep that would actually amount to you being rested. You were situated against your headboard, crust still in your eyes as Christopher stares you down. “If you have something to say, say it. Because this staring thing is making me anxious.” You motioned for him to go on. You were awake enough to at least pay a little bit of attention to whatever it was that was so important. Your mom had left for her shift a few minutes ago, leaving you here with your friend.

“Did he touch you?” He growled. Those were the first words out of his mouth since he’d come and sat on your bed. You scoffed, defensively crossing your arms over your chest.

“No. And why the heck would you even ask me that?” You were down right annoyed by the question, but you couldn’t figure out why. Well- besides whatever beef the two of them have.

“Because, Y/n. I need to know if I need to kill him or not.” Your eyes widened at the serious tone your friend took with you. Has he lost his mind? His jaw was clenched once again, stance ridgid, he really meant that.

“Ki-kill him? The fuck Christopher?” You honestly didn’t know what his problem was, but you needed him to calm down. Nothing good ever came from him being mad. As rare of an occasion as that was. “He saved my life and was honestly a more generous host than I could have asked for.”

His brow twitched, “Saved your life? From what, Y/n?”

Your eyes widened like saucers. You hadn’t intended to let that slip. Now you had to explain to your overprotective bestie that part of his hate was justified. Some vampires were down right foul beings that deserved his pointed hatred. “I… um…” He shifted in his seat, brows knitting together with more ferocity. “I was attacked..” His jaw ticked, your words stoking his anger. “A vampire cornered me.. But Jaehyun stepped in and ran him away.” His mouth opened to say something but you quickly cut him off, “Please, Chris, just trust me on this. He isn’t a bad guy.” You reached out for him, taking his hand in yours, trying your best to be for him what he always was for you. Comfort. “Why are you so worried? Huh? Tell me what's on your mind.” He sighed, rubbing his face with his free hand.

“His kind…” He said that with every bit of disdain he could have mustered. “They have killed indiscriminately for thousands of years. Using their powers to lure innocents into their death dens, draining them of their life and then tossing them like trash. Trust me, he isn’t any different than the rest of those filthy demons.” Never in your ten years of knowing him, have you ever heard him spew such hate. Not towards anyone, not even Vaiden, his rival. For him to say it with his chest like that, meant he really deeply meant every word. “Humans have their issues, we all do. But to kill someone that you know can’t fight back…” You put a hand up. You didn’t want to have more of this conversation. While you were sure there were plenty of bad vampires and werewolves, you didn’t want to think of Chris or Jaehyun in that light.

“I don’t think he’s like that. He’s big on consent.” You nodded as if you had irrefutable proof that Dr. Jay said to you was true. For all you knew, everything he said could have been a life. But you chose to trust him. Why? Because everyone deserves a bit of kindness. He didn’t have to help you. He didn’t have to let you stay the night or buy you things to make sure your stay was comfortable. He was kind enough to be considerate towards you. That was enough for you to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Chris laughed, but there was no humor behind it. “Big… on consent. Right. Y/n, don't tell me you are gullible enough to believe that. He's a predator, just like the rest of his kind. He's probably trying to soften you up before he takes advantage of your kindness.” His words struck a chord with you and the note sounded sour and flat in your ears.

“Chris, I know you have your issues with vampires, but have you considered not all of them are the same?” You stood, too vexed to remain seated. “I’m sure there are preconceived notions about werewolves that aren’t true. Like-like you all being aggressive.” You stood in front of him, grabbing his face, slightly smushing his cheeks with your hands. “You are the kindest person I’ve ever met. Who is kinder than my Chris?” He pursed his lips as if he was going to speak, “And before you start, my mom doesn’t count. She made me, I didn’t meet her.” You chuckled. You kissed his forehead, missing the slight blush that covered his cheeks. “Two things can be true at once. Vampires can be vile creatures that prey on the innocent. But Jaehyun can also be a good one. Him being a vampire doesn’t automatically disqualify him from being kind, babe. Trust me on this, okay?” He looked up at you, wanting to say more but deciding against it. There was no use in arguing, he knew how stubborn you could be when you felt strongly about something. But he wasn’t going to let this go, he didn’t like the guy and he had to know why.

He didn’t know why, but you were still holding his cheeks. He looked up at you as you pursed your lips, producing a small pout. “What?” His hands moved to your hips on their own, like that was where they belonged. If you asked him, it was their rightful place. He belonged next to you, with you. But he could wait, for as long as you needed. After the kiss you shared the other day, all the feelings that he had successfully packed away and pushed to the back of his mind, all came flooding back in an instant.

You shook your head, biting back a smile. “You look cute like this.” You did a few quick squeezes before he shook his head away from your grip. “Oh come on, let me have my way with you.” His brows shot up at your choice of words. Words that didn’t even seem to register with you. “Please, Chris?” He was running in circles in his mind, literally chasing his tail, trying his best to not think of your words in a more obscene content. “Like, I haven’t had the chance to appreciate this new physique you have, yet.” You raked your fingers through his hair, the feeling of your nails scratching over his scalp caused him to let out a breathy sigh. “Was it your transition that caused all this…” You tilted your head, looking for the right words to say as he sat there trying not to pop a boner because of you. “Bulk? Not saying that you weren’t big before.. You certainly were, it’s just.. You look different. In a good way.” You had no idea what you were doing to him. His eyes were still closed even when your hands moved to feel his arms. “It seriously looks like you could toss my car with me in it.” You chuckled.

“It wasn’t… the transition, I was born..like this. Lycanthropy is a hereditary trait. My first time shifting…that happened during puberty…” He finally mumbled out the words, “I.. needed to bulk to protect the people I love from threats. Plus, Changbin is a great motivator.” His eyes fluttered open as your hands moved from his arms to his chest. There was awe written all over your face. “Are you just going to feel me up in the middle of your bedroom, Y/n?” You chuckled again, head tilting back as your hands froze, gripping his pecks.

“I mean… are you against me feeling you up? Mr. I still have my hands on your hips?” He hadn’t even noticed his hands were still in place on your hips, right over your shorts, like they had been glued there.

“Want me to move them?” He asked, hoping your answer would be no. He found comfort in holding you, probably more than you could ever know.

“No.” You said it so matter-of-factly that it surprised him a little. “I like being in your arms.” His heart almost stopped at your confession. Maybe it was because of his long standing crush on you, but those words made him feel a little delusional. That maybe there was a possibility that the two of you could become more one day. “It makes me feel safe, loved.” You sighed wistfully, gazing up at the stars on your ceiling. “You don’t know how many times I just wanted to leave and run back to you. How many times I had to talk myself out of it… because if I didn’t, then everything my ex said about me would be true.”

He instinctively pulled you into him, burying his face into your stomach. Just the mention of your ex, any of them, made his blood boil. Your taste was certainly questionable, especially when it came to anyone besides your chosen friends. “Like, I don’t know why I stayed so long. I knew there wasn’t any love there. He was mean and vindictive, and he never treated me like he even remotely cared. He treated me like shit and I stayed like an idiot. Thinking that maybe if I continued to try, he’d eventually love me back. Even if I knew it would never be.” Your fingers were back in his hair as he hugged you tightly. He could stay like this forever. Nothing else mattered when he was with you.

“Anyways.” He could hear the sadness in your voice, but he didn’t speak about it. He knew you wouldn’t want him to. “I feel like besides knowing about you howling at the full moon and shit, we haven’t really caught up.” He sighed against your stomach. He didn’t want to let you go, but he pulled back, looking up at you with loving eyes. “How has your life been, Chris?” Without you? Almost meaningless. His mind answered for him, but he couldn’t just admit his feelings to you like that. It wasn’t that he didn’t want you to know, he just didn’t think the timing was right. But maybe that was the problem. That was his problem. The timing was never right.

He smiled up at you, pulling you with him as he laid back on the bed. “I’ve had my ups and downs, but I'm happy. I found some really good friends, they are a great support system.” He loved the feeling of you on top of him, but his inner wolf was about to make this situation very hard and awkward for him. He turned you both to the side and as if it was instinct, your hands flew to his hair. He had one arm under your head, while the other rested on your hip. “I’ve been lucky to find them, really. Your mom has been great as well. She’s taken them in like family, and I honestly couldn’t begin to express my gratitude towards her.” You smiled at that. Maybe it was the way you looked almost longingly at him that made his heart soar.

“Well, she does think you are her son.” She laughed, and he couldn’t help but chuckle as well. “I think if she could do an even exchange, she’d still end up paying your mom to take me, just so she could call you her son.” He shook his head at that. He talked about you all the time to his parents. Even the times they had come to visit, which wasn’t often due to the cost and the time it took to travel, they immediately took to you. You were as much a part of his family as he was yours.

“Can you blame her? I’m a fucking awesome son, if I do say so myself. Plus, I’m both our mom’s favorite, they’ll just have to fight or share.” You rolled your eyes, but you knew he was right. Moms just loved this man.

“You are ridiculous.” You tried to fight your smile, playfully pushing his shoulder, just for him not to budge. “Oh, come on! You’re like a fucking rock.” You pushed again, a little forcefully, but again, he didn’t move. He boxed his lips so he wouldn’t laugh at your attempt to push him. You attempted to do it again, but he caught your wrist, bringing your palm to his lips. He pressed a soft kiss to your skin, your fingers curled to cup his cheek without thinking. “No fair..” Your words almost came out as a whisper.

“Who said I wanted to play fair?” He spoke against your palm, his warm breath tickling your skin. Each purse of his lips with every word, pressing more kisses to your skin. “Maybe… I want to be selfish for once..” His lips moved to your wrist. He pressed a kiss there, then drug his nose over your skin. “Can’t I be?” His eyes were closed as he took in your scent. The scent that always drove him wild. He was in an internal fight. He wanted you in every way imaginable. Mind. Body. Soul. Heart. He’d give you all of him in return, if you let him. But he knew he shouldn’t act on any of it.

Chris didn’t know anyone personally who had fallen for a human like he had. A human mate? Sounded laughable to him, it certainly would have been laughable to his old pack back home. Intermingling was frowned upon, even if the person was another supernatural being. Though he took issue with a lot of the views they had, he didn’t leave the pack for that. No, he left home because there was something.. Someone out there that called him. Something told him to apply to universities in the states, and he followed through with that. He was accepted to most of the universities he applied to, but there was one that stuck out more than the rest. Tulane University, in New Orleans, Louisiana. As soon as he laid eyes on you, he knew it was fate. Fate sent him here. Fate sent him to you.

But even fate couldn't stop the persistent little voice in the back of his head that told him things could never be between the two of you. There was another voice, that sounded an awful like his old pack leader, that constantly reminded him that humans were weak, pathetic beings that wouldn’t be able to deal with the fact that all the monsters they grew up reading about were real. Then there was the fact that if he told you the truth, all of it, you might cut ties with him completely, and honestly he wouldn’t be able to handle that. His constant, nagging fear of rejection always put an end to his pining. But that fear had been blanketed by his delusions of you wanting to be with him too. He pulled you in closer, your body now flush to his. His nose was once again rubbing against your skin, this time in the junction between your neck and shoulder. He could hear your heart beating wildly in your chest, the shaky breaths you inhaled and exhaled. He could almost taste the way you were becoming aroused.

He needed to get a grip on himself, but at the same time, he wanted this. No- he needed this. He needed you. His hand moved back to your hip, gripping it tightly over your shorts. He pressed his lips to your neck, dragging them upwards until they met your jaw. You whimpered as his teeth nipped at the skin there. The sound clouded his mind even more than it already was. It was getting harder for him to pull away, but he knows he needs to. It’s just.. The warmth of your body pressed to his, the smell of you, all of you was much too alluring to stop whatever was happening. “Kiss me..” He almost thought he dreamed of you saying the words he wanted to hear. His eyes fluttered open to find yours, something in them was burning just below the surface. “Please.. Chris..” You barely got the words out before his lips were on yours. He kissed you feverishly. One hand laced into your hair as the other slowly moved from its place on your hip to rest in a firm grip of your ass. He had been thinking of this, dreaming of it, since the both of you shared your first kiss. His lips were in constant need of yours. He licked the seam of your mouth and you eagerly parted your lips for him. He slid his tongue into your mouth, deepening the kiss.

The oxygen in the room suddenly seemed thicker. Any coolness from the blasting air conditioning was negated by the heat the two of you were producing. He was already hot when it came to body temperature, but the way you were making him feel added to that exponentially. You rubbed your leg against his, slowly dragging it up to hook over his hip. He desperately pulled you closer, growling when he got a whiff of your arousal. “You.. you aren’t wearing panties.. Are you?” He could smell it too clearly, like there was no barrier between your shorts and your growing wetness. He pulled back to see your face. Your pupils were dilated, skin warm to the touch, lips kiss bitten from your short make out session. You shook your head, out of breath and dazed. You were killing him. To him, you’d never looked more beautiful. He needed to put a stop to this before his inner wolf took over. His hand on your ass slid to the back of your thigh, his blunt nails raking over your skin, making you shiver. His chest rumbled with a low growl. He needed you, spiritually, carnally, wholly. But he knew if he didn’t stop now, he wouldn’t be able to contain his urges. “Fuck…” He pulled back completely, practically launching himself off your bed. “If I don’t go now…” He started to pace, cursing under his breath.

“Wha- why?” You would never be able to understand what was going on in his head. He could only glance at you. Your disheveled look, kiss bitten lips, the pure desperation in your eyes. You needed him like he needed you, at least for the moment. That much was clear. He needed to get out of here. He needed to get away from the smell of your arousal that permeated the air. He needed to rid himself of the sounds of your wimpers that he knew would forever plague his memories. He didn’t want to admit that he needed to get away from you, but he feared he’d act on something that he wouldn’t be able to control. He opened his mouth to speak, only to shut it and rush out of the room. He could hear your footfalls hot on his trail. “Christopher, what the entire fuck? Are you serious right now?” He was glad your mother never closed the real door, she always left the screen closed when someone was there. He pushed it open, not even doing the gentlemanly job of making sure he held it for you.

No, he had to get the fuck out of there before he defiled his friendship with you. Even if you hated him for a while after this, he needed to leave before whatever friendship you had was completely ruined. He stopped on the sidewalk right outside the line of your fence. “If.. if I don’t leave now, I’ll do something I regret.” You let out a sound that sounded like the wind was knocked out of your chest.

“Something… you’ll regret?” You laughed, but there wasn’t an ounce of amusement behind it. “So, you’ll regret being with me?” Tears welled up in your eyes. “Does it sound that bad to you? I thought- You-” You were dejected and even a little confused, that much was clear from the sound of your voice.

He turned on his heels hearing the hurt in your voice. He internally reprimanded himself for hurting you. That was and never would be his intention, not when he lov- “I didn’t mean-”

You cut him off, anger now biting at your emotions and not sadness. “You didn’t mean to? Be so fucking for real right now, Chris. You didn’t mean to what? Kiss me again? You didn’t mean to leave me hanging? You didn’t mean to run out of my house without saying a damn thing?” You shook your head. He reached his hand out to you, just for you to smack his hand away. “Don’t fucking touch me. Not after that. You- you don’t get to do this to me, Chris. I never would have expected this out of you of all people. I can’t believe you’d break-” You stopped, holding back the tears of anger that started to blur your eyes. “Leave.” You turned your back to him. Heading back into your house.

He was a few interactions away from the house when his phone rang through the car speakers. He kept his eyes on the road as he pressed the answer button, “Yeah?” Even his voice reflected the melancholic mood he had been in the last hour or so.

“He- Oh, hyung, you alright?” Changbin asked through the speaker. Chris didn’t know why he didn’t try harder to mask his feelings, guess it probably wouldn’t have made much of a difference anyway.

“I’m fine.” Chris gruffed out, then sighed, “What's up?”

“We found the guys who did this to Jeongin and Seungmin. But…” He could hear a few of them arguing in the background.

“Just tell him the truth, Changbin hyung.” Felix urged in the background.

Changbin let out a long sigh then paused before speaking again, “It’s… Vaiden and his crew.” Christopher slammed on the brakes in the middle of an intersection, the car behind him narrowly avoiding rear ending him.

“The fuck did you just say to me?” The anger didn’t even have the chance to bubble up, it just erupted.

“V-Vaiden and his crew… I overheard some guys talking about the attack when I went to the gym downtown. They did a few targeted attacks on a few different packs. According to them, Vaiden hoped it was you who was beat…” Christopher sped off in the direction of the house, anger pouring off him like a steady rain.

“I’ll fucking kill him.” Was the last thing the boys at home heard before the line went dead. Changbin held the phone away from his body and looked around at everyone else.

“Well, Vaiden’s fucked.”

Chris didn’t let his truck fully come to a stop before he was hoping out. He couldn’t see anything but red. His sour mood from hurting you had morphed into pure rage. He slammed his car door and did the same to the side door that led into the house from the garage, so hard the frame and surrounding windows shook. The boys all looked up at him as he entered the house, none bold enough to speak up, except Minho, “First, calm down. We can’t get this settled if you fly off the handle and attack before we have a plan.” He knew he was right, but the anger that he felt towards the person who had continually wronged him was fueling his every thought at the moment. “Second, we have already found their hideout, we pressed one of their guys-”

“Not very hard, he folded like laundry when Bin hyung hopped out the car.” Felix interrupted before apologizing because of the death glare Minho gave him.

“Like I was saying, we pressed one of their guys and he gave us every bit of information that we needed. We are just waiting for the go ahead from you.” They all looked at him, waiting for his approval. He knew this was a score they needed to settle, hopefully putting a permanent end to all the bullshit the Vaiden pulled. But with what just went down between you and him, how was he to expect if something happened or if someone got hurt, that you would help? Even if it was a part of your family's curse, he couldn’t expect that of you.

“Let me contact Ms. Jenny to make sure she knows we may need her tonight, then we can get going.” Seugmin opened his mouth to say something, but had a hand clamped over his mouth before the words could form. Chris walked away to call your mother, knowing if she answered, he’d have to answer her questions about you.

“Chris? Is everything alright?” She answered only after a few rings.

“For now, yes.” He cleared his throat, “We found the guys who did this… so we are going to take care of that. I just wanted to know where we should take the boys if things go sideways…” She chuckled as if he asked the silliest question.

“To the house, like always. Y/n should be there, it’s not like she has any other friends in town besides you.” She chuckled, “Plus, with her healing Jeongin, it’s her burden to bear now. But I should be off in a few hours to check her work, okay?” He chewed on the inside of his cheek, he couldn’t tell her what happened. What if she thought ill of him because of it? He couldn’t have you and your mother hating his guts because he couldn't control himself.

“Yeah, see you in a few hours.” He headed back into the living room and was once again the center of attention. “What is it now? Why are you looking at me like that?” They all shared a look, trying to see who was going to say it first.

“Is there a reason that your heartbeat is so unsteady?”

“Hyung you only get like that when you lie.”

“Should we be concerned about being healed if something goes left?”

“Hyung what… what happened between you and Y/n?”

“Is there a reason you are looking for Nurse Jenny when you just left Y/n?”

“Y/n helped us last night, why can’t she help again?”

The questions came all at once, but because of his impeccable hearing, he heard every single last word from his pack. He heaved a frustrated sigh, running his fingers through his already disheveled hair. “Look, it's complicated, alright? Leave it at that. No more talk about Y/n.” He put his proverbial foot down. “We have stuff to fucking handle, so that can go on the back burner.” They all settled down at his words, now more concerned with the task they had at hand. “Now let's go take care of business.”

You felt like the sky had come falling down on you, crushing you with its weight. Never in a million years did you think that your puppy like best friend would be capable of breaking your heart like this. You felt like you’d been shattered into billions of tiny little shards. Not even break ups with your exes hurt as bad as this. He kissed you just to tell you he’d regret being with you. Were you that bad? All the memories of what your ex told you came flashing back.

“You fucking whore! I know you’re sleeping with him. Whenever I come around he always has his hands on you. Like he can’t help but touch you, to claim that you are his and his only. You are mine. You are my girlfriend and he needs to be put in his fucking place!”

“Just be real and say what you mean with your chest. You love him and you want to be with him and not me. Why else would you try to leave me and go running back to him? You can’t even answer that, can you? Because you know what I’m saying is the truth!”

“You can’t even stay away from him can you. You changed his contact name in your phone so that I don’t know who is texting and calling you, right? You fucking backstabbing whore!”

He always tried to make you feel bad for the love you had for your best friend. But you later found out it was all just him projecting his shortcomings on you. Actively cheating on you with people you thought were friends, sleeping with random girls, then gaslighting you to make it seem like none of that was true, even when you caught him in the act. You were absolutely miserable towards the end of your relationship and wanted nothing more than to crawl back into the arms of your best friend. Knowing there was a chance he wouldn’t accept you back. Your timid heart soared when he showed up that day with open arms. You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes once again. He was just your friend, you didn’t understand why his sudden rejection was tearing you up the way that it was. Maybe it was because deep down inside you felt more than just fond friendly feelings for your bestie. You would willingly admit that you loved him, but you would never confess to it, possibly being more than just platonic feelings.

You hadn’t noticed that the day had faded into night. Not even your stomach growling at you ferociously snapped you out of the sadness induced haze you seemed to be trapped in. No, it took your house phone blasting the generic ringer for you to snap out of it. You answered without thinking, not even bothering to look and see if the number was at least local.

“Hello?” Your voice was strained and cragley from all the crying you’d done.

“I’m honestly surprised you picked up. Especially with you being all heartbroken over that….. Boy.” Your brows knit together as you recognized the smooth baritone voice coming through the speakers. “Get up, get dressed, and meet me outside.” With that he hung up, leaving you to look at the blindingly bright screen in confusion. What he fuck did he want? Hadn’t you spent enough time together over the last day? You were hoping after this morning's awkward exit, you’d see him again in neverary. But here you were, doing exactly what he asked.

You got up, took a quick shower. You nearly left this plane of existence when you caught a glimpse of your face in the mirror. Hours of crying did nothing for the already deep bags under your eyes. You tried your best to look like a healthy adult woman, but boy was that concealer putting in overtime. It took an extra fifteen to make sure you looked presentable, even though you didn’t know why you were putting in the effort. Dr. Jay was cool, but you couldn’t classify yourself as anything more than just acquaintances, even if he saved your life. So you had no idea why the thought of him seeing you the way you looked forty minutes ago made your skin crawl. You locked up the house and headed out the fence, closing it behind you. You were greeted by a super casual looking Jaehyun, leaning against his car with his hands in his pockets. “I was beginning to get a little worried you weren’t coming out.” He smiled, with those oh so charmingly deep dimples on display.

“I’m sure you knew exactly what I was thinking, you can read my thoughts.” You rolled your eyes at him, stepping right in front of his frame.

“I can. But where is the fun in that?” He opened the door for you, gesturing for you to get in. “How about I let you in on a little secret,” He spoke as you slid into the passenger seat. “I like a good challenge. Things that come easy, bore me.” His voice sent a chill down your spine, but you shook it off, attributing it to the nice breeze that was blowing. He made quick work of closing your door and getting in himself. He belted up and headed out. “So, do you want to talk about why you’ve been crying on and off for the last ten hours?” He asked as if it was nothing, his eyes set on the road.

“I’d rather not talk about it.” You looked down at your hands, fingers picking at the chipped polish on your nails. “Is that why you called me out? Can’t deal with a girl shedding a few tears?”

He huffed into a laugh, “That’s not it at all. I love for a woman to shed a few tears, especially from overstimulation.” He chuckled at his own joke and you shook your head, “But, I also believe that you should try your best not to make women cry. I had to see my mother cry way too many times and was helpless to do anything to help her. I vowed to never be that guy. I refuse to be like my father.” It was like you had already forgotten about his story. How his mother struggled in love with his father. How she didn’t find happiness of her own outside of raising her son, only for him to go off to war and die. You can’t imagine what type of turmoil she went through after that. She urged him not to go, but his stubbornness made him leave. You can’t imagine what she went through finding out the one thing she loved above all else was gone. “It took years for me to find out what happened to my mother.” He said suddenly. “I went back home after leaving Japan. I wanted to see it one more time before I left for Europe.” He gripped the wheel tightly, keeping his eyes straight ahead. But even if you couldn’t look him in the eyes you could tell he was still hurting from whatever happened to her.

“She took her own life…” He swallowed hard, jaw tensing. “These were all second hand accounts of what people think happened. There were only a few surviving family members left and none of them lived in town… But I think I’ve pieced it together. My father had no intention of being with her, besides the occasional booty call. He did have multiple royal concubines, my mother just was never made one. That at least would have made their relationship official in the eyes of the court, even if she was reduced to a royal side piece. When she should have been queen. Then.. I wasn’t there to protect her… Besides my grandfather, her life was full of heartbreak.” He sighed heavily, blinking away the wetness that was dotting his waterline.

“It was about three or four months after the old me died in battle.” He spared you the details of her tragic passing, thankfully. Your heart ached for her. You were also unlucky in love, so you knew a little bit about that. You couldn’t find a man to love you to save your life, sadly. “I guess it was for the best. She didn’t have to deal with the fight for the throne that happened after my father passed.” He sighed, “I probably wouldn’t have been included in it anyways, since I wasn’t on the family tree then. Historians have since then added my mothers name to his list of concubines, saying that she was his first. I mean, it isn’t accurate, but at least she is recognized now.”

“Are you?” You asked softly. You didn’t want to upset him with your question.

“Sort of. They know that she had a child, a son, they just don’t know if that son was the child of the kings or not. Some have put me down as Prince Yunho, posthumously. Others are still doing research into my background. One person even pieced together that I died in the attack during the Imjin war. Research is still continuing into my background and I’m thankful that my mother will at least get the credit for producing an heir to the throne, even if I wasn’t looked at as such during the time.” You couldn’t imagine being in his shoes. He and his mother made many sacrifices just to be pushed out of history. It was honestly a little sad. You were glad that they were both starting to be recognized, but at the same time, you wished he could come forward and piece together all of the missing spaces in him and his mothers history. But you knew why he couldn’t. All that information would have to be fact checked, then that meant they would have to find out how he knew and how, was the issue. He could always lie and say he was a descendant.. You thought. “I have no record of children. Like my mother, I was unmarried at the time of my death.”

For some strange reason, him hearing your thoughts was starting to become normal to you. You were somehow becoming used to it, you didn’t mind it at all. “What about love? I saw in your past that you’ve been in love.. At least twice, right?” He shifted uncomfortably, sitting up straighter behind the wheel. It didn’t take a rocket scientist, or even someone to be able to read his thoughts to know that made him uneasy. “If you feel some type of way of talking about it, you don’t have to. It's not like I’m going to force you or something.”

“It’s not-” He sighed, “I was engaged. Twice.” He nodded. His body was far more rigid than you’d seen it before. “I fell in love right after I completed my schooling. She.. she was beautiful, but it wasn’t about that. Her laugh is what pulled me into her. Her smile was brighter than a million suns. I- I couldn’t help myself. She was the light in the darkest times of my life and even as I laid on the battlefield dying all I hoped was that she and my mother would be okay.” He let out a shaky sigh, “It took years for her to get over my passing. Her parents urged her to move on, saying that no one would marry someone her age. She eventually married, but she died during childbirth.”

This man had been through so much over his long life. Though he was young for a vampire, his life was considerably long in comparison to a humans. You can’t imagine all that he has been through, all of the heartache he has endured. How traumatic it must have been to watch all of your loved ones and friends perish one by one, knowing there is nothing you can do to help prolong their life. Unless you do the selfish thing of inflicting the same kind of pain you have to endure on them. Having to carry the weight of your decisions for four hundred years. “Don’t look so sad.” He finally looked over at you, “It took me a very long time to sort my feelings, but I have. Took me even longer to consider falling in love again, but I did.” He paused as he turned down a dark road, the city landscape was left behind the two of you a whole ten minutes ago, you were officially out of town. “Before you ask about the second time, I have a question for you. Do you believe in reincarnation?” Your brows knit together. What kind of question was that? “Come on, Y/n, it's a yes or no question.” He chuckled lightly.

“I guess. I mean, considering all this shit with vampires, witches, werewolves and all that other fucked up supernatural bullshit, why not, right?”

He smirked, but didn’t say another word. You couldn’t see much further past the front of his car. You didn’t realize how creepy this was until this very moment. Once again you were alone with a man you didn’t know. Now, in some unrecognizable forested area. You looked at your phone, of course there was no reception all the way out here. If he wanted to drain you dry, he honestly could. It wasn’t like you told anyone where you were going, you didn’t have the chance too. Even if you did, who would you tell? Your mom was at work and your best friend was currently being an asshat. You sighed, accepting your fate. If the handsome doctor decided he wanted to kill you all the way out here in this remote area, then so be it. “You really have to stop thinking the worst of me, Y/n.” His laughter filled the space, making the atmosphere a little less tense. Just a little bit though. The thick foliage around the trail started to taper off, revealing the moon high in the sky. The light fog and silver gleam were the backdrop to the large mansion at the end of the road. It looked like it was straight out of every stereotypical horror movie. You know, the ones where all the warning signs were on the gate saying, beware, danger, keep out, and all that jazz. You must have missed them while you were busy listening and looking at your late night car ride companion.

You passed a fountain in the middle of the circular driveway. The water was so dark it almost resembled blood. But you knew that couldn’t possibly be what it was… right? You were so deep in your thoughts that you hadn’t noticed he had gotten out and made his way to your side of the car until you felt him reach across you to undo your seatbelt. Pulling back he extended a hand to help you out. Once again you found yourself taking it, almost like you couldn’t say no to this man even if you wanted to. This antebellum style home gave you the creeps. The tall pillars, multiple floors with its wrap around porches. It screamed slavery, loudly. You gripped his hand tighter, realizing then that he was still holding yours. The closer you got to the door the more dread you started to feel. It was like trudging through quicksand in an attempt to escape it, it was pulling you in deeper. He pushed the large wooden door open, the creak of it echoing off the walls of the entryway. It was dark and dusty and felt like it was pulled right out of the haunted mansion ride at disney. You honestly were expecting a ghost to pop out at any moment. But nothing popped out. He pulled you deeper into the house, passing the left side of the staircase. You passed a few doors before you entered one, a ballroom. There was a large fireplace with a portrait that looked to be at least nine feet tall hanging over it.

“I have been in love twice. Once with my beloved Eunha. Then again on my voyage to America from Spain.” He let your hand go and moved closer to the fireplace. He reached into the mantle and pulled something off that you couldn’t see, but as soon as the match lit you knew what it was. The fire roared to life, lighting up the space, including that portrait above it. The light flickered over the two figures in it, one you immediately recognized as Jaehyun. You could feel the blood drain from your face as the portrait became clearer. The smile, the eyes, even the nose were the same. “I believe that you only have one true love in life. One soul that you are tethered to. One person you are meant to be with above all else.” He tossed the matchbox back on the mantle, pushing his hands into his pockets as he turned to you. “I believe in reincarnation of the spirit. If it wasn’t possible, how would I have met you?”

Lightning flashed outside the window. The bright light makes the portrait even clearer to you. It was you standing next to Jaehyun. Your hand over his heart as you started at his face lovingly. How the fuck was this even possible? You stumbled backwards as you tried to gather yourself. This had to be the worst week of your life. First you're a witch and now you are the reincarnation of some vampire's lost love? “What the actual fuck?”

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