#Car Wash Vending Machine

[carwashbiz]

Check Out This Smart Car Wash Vending Machine!

Check out this Smart Car Wash Vending Machine, a 24-hour unattended self-service car washing machine! Offered by Leaf Technology, a high-tech enterprise dedicated to the research and development, production and sales of self-service car wash machines. Their self-service equipment is sold all over the world (USA and International). 1. Water2. Soap3. Vacuuming4. Washing hands5. Disinfection6.…

[y2k-2day]

Ciara feat. Petey Pablo - Goodies (2004)

[comicaurora]

I put a car wash token in the urban fantasy vending machine

a spring of pure crystal-clear water emerges from the change slot. so does some soap.

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Yandere Coworker (Part6)

Tw: a little sickness, Cyprus patting you on the butt non consensually super short chapter, tw afab reader

like idk guys its so hard for me to brainrot for Cyprus i don't like him and i rarely get asks that would leave long analyses and theories for Yves, so he's not a fun guy to work with

but anyways here u go a more softer side (i guess)

masterlists, part 1, part 7

He grinned. "I knew you'd come around."

Cyprus straightened his posture. He kept your ID away and left the scene.

The day went by smoothly after that.

__

Two minutes before lunch, you made a beeline to the toilets. You locked yourself in a stall and planned to stay there until that dreadful hour is up. Cyprus obviously can't enter the women's restroom, he would risk his job.

Actually, you hope he did. HR has grounds to fire him, or at least reprimand that man.

Half an hour in, you received a text from Cyprus.

"Wtf is taking you so long"

"you ok?"

You replied, deciding to use a fake stomachache as an excuse.

You thought he gave up and left you alone for now. You nervously kept glancing at the clock in your phone, it ticks by slowly as you worry about what he would do.

As you breathe slowly and jump every time someone opens the door to use the bathroom, you fidgeted with the hem of your blouse nervously. Time ticks by and before you know it, lunch is over for you.

You let out a sigh of relief. Finally, one hour without that fucking creep. You exit your bathroom stall, wash your hands, dry them, and get out of the toilet.

You only had one foot out of the women's restroom before that deep vibrating voice of his reached your ears and made you jolt.

"You okay, babygirl?"

You whisked your head to the side to see him leaning against the wall, with his arms crossed and a look of genuine concern on his handsome face.

You stammered, yes. You would like to get back to work now.

He didn't stop you from scurrying away to your seat. Not like he could do anything now, his lunch is over too. So he has to get back to work or he faces the risk of getting called to HR.

You immersed yourself in work, tapping away and tuning out all surrounding noises. To you, minutes or hours felt the same. You don't know how long you've been working since you got out of the restroom, but you're sure it's been a while. The gears in your head are churning non-stop to try and figure out a plan to get away from Cyprus. Or get him fired so you can work in peace.

"Princess."

You craned your neck up only to be kissed on the forehead. Cyprus set something down on your desk. You turned your focus to the object he placed in front of you.

"For your stomach." It's a steaming hot cup of green tea. He must have prepared it earlier in the kitchen. You picked it up and muttered a thanks to him.

"I don't think you ate anything today. Here." He opened a packet of bland crackers, which you recognized was from the vending machine. Cyprus placed it near you.

You said you appreciate it, but he needs to get back to work before Jane yells at him. He scoffed at the mention of her name.

"She can't do crap to us. If she's giving you a hard time, tell me." He ruffled your hair as he walked back to his cubicle.

__

You're now genuinely feeling sick in the stomach as Cyprus carries your suitcase for you to his car. Your coworkers said bye to the two of you as they got into their respective vehicles too, but you knew behind those friendly grins was the intent to gossip.

You went to the passenger's side, not realizing that Cyprus was noticing how you were looking a little green in the face.

You buckled your belt up and so did he after shutting the door and igniting the engine.

You flinched when he brought a hand to your face, but he did or said nothing except to touch your cheek with the back of his palm. It then slid down to your neck, and back up to your forehead. You were too tired and frazzled to ask him what he was doing. All you did was to stay still.

He let out a sigh before retracting his digits and placing them firmly on the steering wheel.

Cyprus drove in silence, periodically looking at the rearview and side mirror to check the position of his car relative to the road. You're surprised that he wasn't in a chatty mood today, not interested in teasing you or extracting new information about yourself. He seemed grumpy, but you don't know why, was it because you didn't join him for lunch earlier?

You decided to seal your lips in the end though, savoring this rare instance of silence, and decided to scroll through your phone instead, feeding your brain with social media junk food until it's too sick to take anymore.

Cyprus would spare some quick glances at you periodically, there was a disapproving look on his face when he realized that you have no interest in looking out of the window at all. Just on your phone screen.

He actually... pities you. He thinks you're trapped, you've been in this routine for so long because you were spineless enough to let Jane work you to the bones. The only thing that's remotely fun for you to do, that's within your time and financial budget is to surf the net. Now, you have Cyprus to keep your boss in check, you have him to pay for your exciting adventures together, and to manage your time for you, yet you're still falling into the same rut.

It takes time, as habits are hard to break. Especially bad ones such as your obsessive scrolling and his smoking. It's fine, he is willing to work with you. Cyprus thinks overcoming obstacles like these will strengthen the bond between you and him as a romantic couple.

"We're here." You were snapped out of your trance by his voice. Cyprus killed the engine and unbuckled his seatbelt. You did so too and left the car, but this doesn't seem like his house. No, not at all, he brought you to a block with various businesses still operating past office hours.

You asked where he had brought you to. Cyprus ignored you and grabbed you by the arm, dragging you with him into a shop. The smell of antiseptic stung your nose upon entry and the blindingly bright lights gave away that he brought you to a clinic.

You told him that you're fine. But that made him hush you before talking to the receptionist on your behalf.

Once he's done registering for you, he turns around to look at you.

"Sit, we're gonna need to wait for a while." He leads you to the waiting chairs by the small of your back.

You said that you were fine, it was just a small stomach ache. He rolled his eyes at you and grunted, he crossed his arms and leaned back into his chair. Cyprus loosened his necktie earlier and unbuttoned the collars, giving everyone a glimpse of his sculpted chest.

Seeing that nothing was getting to him, you pulled out your phone. You failed to notice how he side-eyed you for doing so.

"What do you want for dinner, princess?" He asked, frowning when you're still glued to your phone.

You said anything is fine. Which slightly infuriated him.

You exclaimed an expression of surprise when he snatched it away from your hands. He dangled the device next to his face as he adjusted his glasses.

"Christ, I really need to tape this to my head for you to look at me." He narrowed his eyes at you.

You asked if you could have it back. But all he did was switch it off and shove it into his pocket.

"You're addicted to this crap." He spoke, in a condescending tone and a face that suggests that you did something to offend him.

You said that you can say the same for him and smoking. But you're not controlling him or trying to get him to stop smoking his life away.

"Maybe you should. Because, Hell, I'm not letting you scroll your life away." A teasing smirk reached his face.

You demanded his packet of cigarettes, and to your surprise, he handed it to you without a complaint. You swiped it away and hid it in your pockets too, he didn't say a word or pull a face at you. He simply crossed his arms and resumed resting in his original position.

You were upset, that you have nothing to pacify you at the moment. So you decided to be petty and proceed to break all his cigarettes, reducing them into mere leaves of tobacco and shreds of rolling paper.

He watched you wide-eyed, his mouth opened and shut, as if he was about to say something but decided against it in the end. Cyprus is having a hard time controlling his breathing and the twitches in his eyelids. You just shredded $50 worth of cigarettes.

But... it was fair. He helps you break this addiction towards this bright brick, and you break his addiction to lung cancer. Though, it doesn't hurt any less that a good pack has gone to waste.

You got up and chucked it into the trashcan nearby, marching off to sit far away from Cyprus.

He simply stood up and sat next to you. So you moved. Then he moved. You moved, he moved.

This sequence went on until your name was called by the nurse.

He gently slapped your bum as you walked to the consultation room. You whipped back and flipped him off. Cyprus simply shrugged and grinned at you.

He watched you disappear past the door frame. The nurse closed the door behind you a bit after that.

Cyprus rose from his seat and took long strides to the bin. He looked down uneasily at the desecrated carcinogenic sticks.

He sighed, taking his glasses off and massaging the bridge of his nose.

It's going to be difficult. But he's willing to work with you.

[berberriescorner]

“Echoes of Redemption”

Characters: Jay Halstead x Black!Reader.

Summary: After a tumultuous relationship marked by Jay Halstead's absences and affairs, you begin to rebuild your life.

Warnings: A smidge of profanity, a bit of humor, angst, anger, fluff, and a lil’ smut👀😆.

Word Count: 5,000+.

A/N: This is my first Halstead fix, but hopefully you lovelies will love it🩵.

Inspired By🩵:

Adam cradled your work bag and purse in one hand, his broad shoulders carrying the weight of your exhaustion. His free hand pressed the down button for the elevator, the soft ping of the mechanism cutting through the silence. You sighed deeply, closing your eyes for a brief moment, letting the weariness wash over you.

“Tired?” he asked, concern lacing his voice.

“Exhausted. I could sleep for days,” you responded, the fatigue squinting your eyes. A massive yawn escaped your lips as the elevator doors slid open. You leaned against the wall for support, stifling another yawn. “Sorry,” you murmured.

“It’s all good. I hope you can get some rest once you’re home,” he said, as his voice comforted your frazzled nerves.

“Thanks, Adam. For everything. You've all been so supportive. Even if it's a bit awkward.”

The elevator dinged, and Adam gestured for you to step out first. He spotted a nearby vending machine and asked, “Did you eat today?”

Not waiting for your answer, he walked over to the whirring machine and purchased a bottle of water and a bag of smart popcorn. You sank onto a bench, grateful for the brief respite. Adam returned, popping open the snack and handing you the bag and the beverage. The two of you continued on your journey to the parking lot.

“Maybe this can give you a bit of energy.”

“Adam, you don't have to make such a fuss. You, Kim, Kevin, and Voight have already done enough. I can't believe she made a time chart so everyone can take turns escorting me to these appointments. She even has poor Dante in on it. That baby has his hands full taking care of himself. Bless his heart.”

“Are you kidding me? You're family. That’s what you do for loved ones,” he assured you, his eyes steady and sincere.

“Is this not awkward for you guys? Hailey’s your friend too,” you grudgingly admitted.

“Yes, but we knew you first. We're not going to abandon years of friendship over drama. We support her just as we do you. J—”

“Adam, please don't. The thought of him is even more stressful. Thanks for the snack. I can finish this in the car. I'm ready to get home to my comfy bed. It's been a long day.”

You caught a flicker of emotion in Adam's eyes, but he quickly masked it. Clearing his throat, he agreed, “You’re right. Let's get you home. Kim’s making me and Mak’s favorite dinner tonight,” he bragged, trying to lighten the mood.

“You bring baby girl next time. I miss her cute wittle face,” you demanded.

“Yes, ma’am.”

The walk to the exit grew quiet and tense. You glanced at Adam out of the corner of your eye.

“You good?”

“Y-yeah. Just thinking about a case,” he lied, his voice unconvincing.

As he opened the door, you started to press about the case. But your words caught in your throat at the sight of a figure standing across the parking lot. Your gaze locked onto the face, shock coursing through you. You spun around, the question about the case forgotten. "Tell me you didn't. What is he doing here?"

Adam scratched the back of his neck, looking apologetic. “Sorry, sis. The moment Hailey found out, she said he deserved to know. It was either she’d tell him, or Kevin and I. Kim was against it all. Voight was neutral.”

“I told you I would tell him on my own time!”

“When would that have been? You've been putting it off for three months now,” Adam argued.

“You don't get it. None of you know the entirety of the situation. I'm not just some home-wrecking whore. If anything, my home was the one that took the damage. You might want to remind Hailey of that, given that she's out here giving an ultimatum based on my life.”

Your gaze fixated on the once-sparkling eyes that had the power to make your heart flutter. Now, those same eyes left your heart in ruins, a painful reminder of what was lost.

“Why are you here? Shouldn't you be somewhere across an ocean or something?”

Jay walked up slowly like he was approaching a wounded animal. He stood a few inches away from you, hands buried in his pockets, looking down. “I just want to talk,” he begged.

“Now you want to have a conversation? Why, Jay? Why are you here? You made your choice.”

“Did I make my choice?”

“Walking—sorry, running—away was a choice. Was it not?”

His eyes locked with yours as he pleaded, “I know you hate me, but please, just one conversation? I took leave as soon as I found out.”

“Are you supposed to get brownie points for that,” you snapped.

“Sweetheart—”

“You don't get to call me that,” you growled.

Adam’s hand rested on your shoulder, the turmoil between two of his dearest friends cutting deep. It reminded him of the trying times he and Kim had gone through. He held out hope that you two would find some resolve.

“You know this exchange needs to happen. Maybe you'll find clarity,” Adam said, looking you in the eyes. “I'm sure he’s come to his senses over the past couple of months. Surely he realizes he could have handled the situation better and that he was being stupid.”

"Thanks, Adam. That's incredibly helpful," Jay retorted with a sarcastic edge.

Ruzek shot him a glare. “As I was saying, this needs to happen. Do me a favor. Let him drive you home. Give him however much time you want to explain himself. Discuss the most important things. Then you can either reconcile or tell him to go to hell.”

Jay threw his hands in the air. Adam cut his eyes to him. “Being my bro doesn't give you a pass. I'm going to call you on your shit. You know that.”

“Reconcile? You must have confused me with Hailey.”

“Damn it, sis.”

“Fine,” you snarled, turning to head toward Jay's truck.

“Thanks! Love you,” Ruzek shouted as you flipped them both off.

Adam shoved your belongings into Jay’s chest. His voice dropped into a menacing, judgemental tone. “Glad to have you back, brother. Try not to leave things as messed up as you did the last time. When are you going to stop screwing her over and flipping her life upside down? You better make this right.”

“I will make it right with everyone involved.”

“No, just her. You've got to choose, and it needs to be her.”

“Who says I hadn't already tried to do that?”

“Yeah, and then you changed your mind.”

“That's not what I meant to do. You know what, Ruzek? I know I screwed up. Can we pause this lecture so I can try and rectify my mistakes?”

Adam paused for emphasis. He needed Jay to listen to the advice he was about to give, to let it sink in truly.

"You messed up, Halstead," Adam said, his voice gruff but laced with concern. "But you gotta fight for her. Show her you mean it this time." Jay clenched his jaw, the truth of Adam's words scraping at his already sore conscience.

“I hear you, brother. Truly. I’ve been stupid far too long, and it’s time I get my life in order. I just–needed to get away. To finish something I’d run from for far too long. I took that time away to figure out how to stop sabotaging the things and people I love most.

Adam nodded his head before laying into him once more, “I swear to God, Jay Halstead, if you mess this up again—if you don't manage to pull your head out of your ass—Kevin and I are going to knock you out cold.”

“It sure is good to be home,” Jay sighed, walking toward the passenger door. He unlocked it and helped you, vertically challenged as you were, into the monstrous truck.

The minute your butt hit the seat, you snatched away from him. He slid into the driver's seat, reaching across to buckle your seatbelt as he had in the past. He jumped back as you slapped his hand away.

“I’ve got it. Just drive.”

Half the drive to your apartment was filled with tense silence. Jay couldn't take it any longer. He cleared his throat, attempting to engage in conversation.

“How have you been? You look as beautiful as ever.”

Your head snapped to the side as if you had been struck. Jay kept his eyes on the road, but he could feel your piercing glare.

“Look, I'm trying not to raise my blood pressure these days. Do me a favor and keep the stupid ass questions to a minimum,” you hissed.

“Jesus, Y/N. No matter what I say, it’s going to upset you. I admit it’s well-deserved, but can't we be civil until we at least get to the house?”

“Civil? Are you trying to gaslight me right now? You don't deserve civility. How about we ride in silence? Nothing I say to you is going to be nice, Jay.”

“Silence it is.”

The sight of your driveway eased the tension in Jay's shoulders. He shut off the engine, the rumble fading into the quiet hum of the neighborhood. Stepping out of the dusty truck, his legs ached from hours on the road, but he glided to your passenger door.

"Hey there," he greeted with a hint of breathlessness in his voice. He started to reach out, but you mumbled a quick "thanks" as you slid out and brushed past him, already digging in your purse for your keys.

Jay lingered on the curb briefly, a flicker of disappointment crossing his features before the familiar puppy-dog eyes returned. You rolled your eyes playfully, the sound masking the growing unease in your stomach. "Alright, alright. I'll hear you out," you conceded, finally finding your keys. "But I swear if you—"

Your playful threat was cut short by the sudden seriousness in Jay's voice. He reached out, his fingers brushing against yours as he placed the keys inside your pants pocket. "I've got it," he murmured, his gaze dropping to the worn metal in his hand. He chewed his lip nervously a stark contrast to his usual confident demeanor.

"Why keep my spare key?" you asked, suspicion evident.

Jay hesitated, his shoulders slumping slightly. When he met your gaze again, his eyes were a storm of hidden emotions. Sadness mingled with something deeper, something you couldn't quite place. "I wasn't planning to leave," he admitted, his voice thick with regret. "Not for good, that is."

You sighed, the energy draining from your body like air from a punctured balloon. The weight of his words settled on you, heavy and unspoken. "Right," you said, your voice flat. "Just unlock the door, Jay. My feet are killing me."

As Jay unlocked the door and pushed it open, you stepped inside and felt a wave of relief wash over you. The familiar comfort of home was opposite the whirlwind of emotions you were feeling. You kicked off your shoes and trudged towards the living room, dropping onto the couch with a heavy sigh. Jay followed, lingering in the doorway as if unsure whether to stand or join you.

You looked up at him, the silence between you charged with unresolved tension. "You can sit, Jay. I won't bite your head off. I'll try not to that is."

He nodded and sat down on the opposite end of the couch, his posture rigid. "Thanks."

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the quiet settling around you like a heavy blanket. Finally, Jay broke the silence. "I know you're angry. You have every right to be. But I need you to know that I never meant for things to get this bad. Before I get into all of that. I have to ask. It’s a stupid question, and I probably already know the answer. Why didn't you respond to any of my letters? Did you read any of them?”

“No.”

“Not even the emails or texts?”

“Nope,” you responded, emphasizing the letter p.

“If you had read them. You would've known that I tried to explain myself even if they were selfish reasons. Part of you may have understood why I did what I did.”

“Well, I didn't, Jay. You left without even saying goodbye. You didn't deserve another moment of my time. Be grateful you're getting it now.” You glanced at him, your expression guarded. "Why did you come back, Jay? Really?"

He took a deep breath, his eyes searching yours. "Because I found out you're pregnant."

Emotions crashed over you all at once. "So that's it? They tell you I'm pregnant and you come running back?"

"It's not just about the baby," he insisted. "I want to be here for you, for us. I realized that running away was a mistake. I thought I was protecting you, but I was just being a coward. I want to make things right, if you'll let me."

"Make things right?" you echoed, a hint of bitterness in your voice. "You think you can just come back and fix everything with a few words? Every time we've faced an obstacle, you've chosen everything over me. Your career, your fleeting moment of weakness for Hailey, even leaving to return to the army. How do I know this time will be different?"

Memories of your tumultuous past resurfaced. You and Jay had started dating years ago, your connection was instant and intense. Things got serious quickly, but Jay's fear of commitment led him to break things off and pursue a relationship with Erin Lindsay. When Erin left for an FBI job, Jay came running back to you, realizing he'd only gotten involved with her as a means to run from commitment as always.

You took him back, and things got serious again. Only that time his career became increasingly dangerous, and your constant fear for his safety caused a rift. He chose his job over you, and the two of you broke up. That time it hadn't hurt as much. You had no right to force him to choose between a career and the woman he loved. You took it as a sign that perhaps you just needed time apart.

After some time, you started to slowly rebuild your relationship, only for Jay to start having feelings for Hailey Upton. Though you know the responsibility lay mostly in your man. You still felt a way about Hailey deciding to pursue him anyway. She knew the two of you were amid reconciliation. Even with that knowledge, she still initiated the kiss and confession of attraction that confused Jay.

You argued over his feelings for the both of you and eventually, you broke up. Jay pursued things with Hailey, and while at first, it was just hooking up, things eventually got serious. Your weakness for him led to the two of you still sleeping together, but when Hailey discovered the two of you were still involved. Suddenly she wanted a committed relationship, Jay chose her. They got married (out of Jay’s perverse sense of loyalty and obligation to the team), and you tried to move on. But Jay's jealousy and selfish attempts to sabotage your relationships made it clear he was still not over you.

He soon realized he made a mistake getting involved with Hailey. You refused to take him back until he was a single man, and after a quick divorce, Jay struggled with wanting to serve a bigger purpose. It was as if he was in the midst of an early midlife crisis. Just as you two had started to rekindle your romance and rebuild, he up and left to rejoin the army.

As you were trying to pick up the broken pieces of your heart, you discovered the pregnancy. Jay found out from your friends and returned home to explain himself, determined to make things right this time. The touch of his fingers gliding across your cheek brought you back to the present. You tilted back from his touch.

“That's what you always do, Jay,” you began, your voice trembling with suppressed emotion. “Run and leave me to deal with the fallout of broken promises and heartbreak. At every turn, you've chosen everyone, everything else, over me. Erin. Your job. Marrying Hailey! Not to mention she's not the first wife, but the second. What is it three times a charm? You’ve already knocked me up. Now all you gotta do is marry me and run. Just like you always do. Hell, you chose the military over me, Jay! So tell me, why? Why should I let you back in and risk you breaking this baby’s heart in the future? Why do you always run, Jay?”

His expression softened, his eyes filled with regret as he listened to your words. He reached out, gently cupping your face in his hands. The pads of his thumbs swiped at the tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Because I was scared, honey,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “Scared of messing things up, of not being good enough for you. But I realize now that running away only made things worse, that I can’t keep hiding from my mistakes. I want to be here for you, for our child. I want to make things right, to be the man you deserve.”

Jay met your gaze, his resolve hardening. "No more running," he vowed silently. The fear of losing you forever was a terrifying prospect, but it paled in comparison to the regret of never trying at all. He had to face his demons and fight for the future he longed for.

More tears fell as you looked into his eyes, searching for any sign of sincerity. And there, amidst the pain and regret, you saw it – a glimmer of hope, a flicker of determination.

The weight of your history hung in the air as you sat together, the past intertwining with the present. Jay reached out, his hand gently covering yours. “I know I’ve made a lot of mistakes, and I’ve hurt you more than I can ever make up for. But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere. I want to be a part of your life, and our child’s life, if you’ll let me.”

“I’m tired of being hurt, Jay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “But if you’re willing to try, if you’re willing to fight for us, then maybe... just maybe, we can find a way to make this work.”

Jay nodded, his grip on your face tightening ever so slightly. “I’m willing to do whatever it takes, sweetheart. I love you, and I’ll spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”

You looked into his eyes, seeing the pang of regret. “It’s not going to be easy, Jay. We have a lot to work through. But I want to believe that you’ve changed, that you’re here for the right reasons.”

“I am,” he said firmly. “I know I’ve chosen wrong in the past, but I’m choosing you now. I’m choosing us.”

“Okay,” you said, your voice steady. “Let’s take it one step at a time.”

Jay nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. “One step at a time.”

As you sat together, the first glimmers of hope began to shine through the darkness. It was a long road ahead, but with determination and love, you knew you could face whatever challenges came your way, together.

But there was something Jay had kept from you, something he had been working on while he was away. As you looked into his eyes, you saw a hint of hesitation, a flicker of uncertainty.

“There’s something else I need to tell you,” he began, his voice hesitant. “While I was deployed, I... I started talking to a therapist.”

Your eyebrows furrowed in surprise, a million questions flooding your mind. “A therapist? Did something happen while you were away? Are you okay,” you rambled as your mind raced with a thousand different scenarios.

Jay took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. “Honey. Honey, relax. I'm not hurt. I realized that I needed help and that I couldn’t keep running from my problems. I needed to confront my past, to understand why I kept making the same mistakes over and over again.”

“And did it help?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He nodded, a sense of relief washing over him. “Yeah, it did. I learned a lot about myself, about the things that drove me to make those mistakes. And I made a promise to myself – and you – that I would come back a better man, that I would do whatever it takes to make things right. I'm going to continue my journey with therapy. After all the pain I've caused. I think it wouldn't hurt to do couples counseling. Only if that's something you're interested in pursuing.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked at him, a mixture of relief and gratitude flooding your heart. “I'd like that. Thank you,” you whispered, the words barely audible.

Jay reached out, gently wiping away your tears. “I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through. But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere. I love you and I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right.”

You leaned into his touch, feeling a sense of peace wash over you. The weight of the past slowly began to lift, replaced by a sense of hope for the future. It wouldn’t be easy, you knew, but with determination and love, you were ready to face whatever challenges came your way, together.

Things grew quiet as the two of you looked longingly at one another. The faintest gasp slipped and you whispered, “Jay, you can't look at me like that.”

His voice low and husky, he responded, “How am I looking at you, sweetheart? I haven't seen or held you in quite some time. Admittedly, I'm the one to blame for that, but there isn't any other way I could look at you right now.”

“Please,” you begged. “Damn it, Jay. Look at me like I disgust you. Just, anything but the way you're staring at me now.”

“You want me to look at you with disgust,” he questioned, already shaking his head no. “That's not possible, honey.”

“Listen to me, Jay Halstead. I'm very pregnant and hormonal right now. I need you to be the bigger person and say that what I'm thinking is a bad idea. You need to be strong for both of us. Go home, Jay. If you don’t, we may give in to temptation. Why did you have to wear that damn uniform?”

He gave you a megawatt smile, slightly nibbling at his lips as if he was embarrassed by your compliment.

“Why, Mr. Halstead, are you blushing,” you questioningly teased.

N-No,” he spluttered.

A brief silence was followed by laughter. Once it ceased, Jay spoke in a soft, warm voice, “To answer your question. This is home, sweetheart. It is in my heart.”

And then, in a moment of weakness, as the pregnancy hormones surged through your body and desire flared between you, you found yourselves giving in to the longing that had been simmering beneath the surface. In each other’s arms, you found solace, comfort, and a renewed sense of hope for the future.

Jay didn't want to ruin things, but if something were to happen. He'd not only need consent and for you to set things in motion. He'd been given a chance to make things right. Jay wouldn't risk it all by making you believe this was the only reason he had come to talk.

“Don’t make me regret this, Jay.”

Before he could answer, you surged onto his lap, kissing him with all the pent-up passion you could muster. You both sighed and moaned as your lips met. Pulling away briefly, you pressed yourself into him. "There's no time for foreplay," you murmured.

Jay groaned as his eyes snapped closed. He grabbed hold of your waist, anchoring you to his lap. Slowly, his eyes peeled open. They were filled with hunger and uncertainty. “Are you sure, honey? I'd understand if you wanted to wait.”

Your hand trailed up his back, sending shivers down his spine as it glided sensuously up his neck and into his hair. Your fingers tangled gently in his light brown locks, tugging playfully. Your other hand encircled his throat in a delicate caress, “That depends. How badly do you miss me riding your thick, veiny, co-.”

Jay's growl silenced you abruptly, shattering his composure.“Ever the little tempting brat. Aren't you, sweet girl?”

In a feverish rush, you tore at each other's clothes. Pushing Jay onto the sofa, you straddled him, reclaiming your dominance. You descended slowly, savoring the sensation. Your pants joined his symphony of groans as you moved your hips. Alternating between rocking and moving in a circular motion. Pleasure washed over you both, leaving Jay breathless.

“F-fuck. Baby, if you squeeze me any tighter, this won’t last long.”

Being the petty brat you are. You allowed your muscles to contract around him again. Jay couldn't help but shake his head from side to side and chuckle. His eyes found yours, turning dark as they simmered with heat. Jay’s hand collided with your soft, ample, flesh. He reveled in the half moan, half whine it pulled from your lips.

His hands pawed at your hips possessively forcing you up to his tip before quickly pulling you back down. You both cried out and you begged him to do it again. Jay repeated the motion as he freed one hand to toy and pinch at your bundle of nerves. With every pinch and circle of his fingers, you climbed higher. The closer you came to falling over the edge the more your walls gripped his flesh.

“Let go for me, sweetheart. Can you do that for me, sweet girl? Hmm? Yes, you can. Can't you, baby? Come for me, sweetheart. Soak me and this damn couch just like I know you can.”

Jay slammed you down one final time locking you into place as he circled your nub. Your face buried into his neck as violent shakes paired with sobs. You ground against his lap riding out the orgasm. Jay held you close as he left kisses against the side of your head. He talked you down from an intense orgasm. “You’re okay, honey. You're okay. You did so good for me.”

He tensed hearing sniffles muffle into the side of his neck. “Baby? Are you okay?”

“Promise you won't leave me again, Jay.”

He lifted your head, his eyes filled with reassurance. “I promise, baby. Never again. Okay?”

You nodded in agreement as he wiped your face. He stole a quick kiss before pulling you back against him to cuddle again.

“Jay,” your question muffled against his neck again.

“Yes, baby-.”

His response caught in his throat as you clamped down on him once more. Your lips trailed from the side of his neck up to his ear. You playfully bit his ear and moaned, “You didn’t get to come.”

“Keep doing that and it won't take long, sweetheart,” he groaned.

The morning sun streamed through the curtains, casting a warm glow across the room as you stirred in Jay's embrace. The events of the previous night played like a dream in your mind, a mixture of vulnerability, longing, and desire. You glanced at Jay, still sleeping peacefully beside you, and couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you.

As you lay there, basking in the afterglow of your shared moment of weakness, you couldn't shake the feeling of hope that filled your heart. Despite the challenges and uncertainties that lay ahead, you knew that you and Jay would face them together, united in love and determination.

With a soft smile, you pressed a gentle kiss to Jay's lips, feeling a surge of warmth and affection between you. The kiss pulled Jay from his slumber. Blinking a few times to clear the sleep from his vision, he rubbed at your small but noticeable bump.

“Oh, I see put me back to sleep so you can nap some more,” you teased. “Fine by me, Halstead.” Jay smirked and continued rubbing in circular motions. Just as you were about to drift off to sleep, there was a loud knock on the door, causing you both to jump.

Jay chuckled, planting a kiss on your forehead before pulling away. "I'll go see who it is."

As he made his way to the door, you heard familiar voices on the other side. "Come on, man. We gotta make sure Jay's still in one piece," Adam's voice rang out.

"Yeah, and see if they've reconciled yet," Kevin chimed in.

With a grin, Jay swung open the door to reveal Adam and Kevin standing on the doorstep, wearing matching grins and teasing expressions.

"Hey there, lovebirds. Just making sure Jay survived the night," Adam quipped.

Jay rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of amusement in his expression. "Yeah, yeah. Thanks for the concern, guys."

Kevin nudged Adam with a smirk. "Did y’all kiss and make up, or do we need to start planning your escape route? Blink twice if you need help bro."

You couldn't help but laugh at their antics, shaking your head in mock exasperation. "We're working on it, okay? Now, if you don't mind, we were kind of in the middle of something."

Adam and Kevin exchanged a knowing look before raising their hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. We'll leave you two lovebirds to it. But just remember, we're always here if you need a referee," Adam teased, earning a playful swat from Jay. Kim told me to say she expects a full run down over lunch tomorrow. She kept saying she wanted all the tea. What does that even mean?”

Kevin shook his head in disappointment. “Come on big dog. I'll have to teach you some new lingo on the way back to the precinct. Jay? Voight said you always have a job where he's concerned. Before you decline. Hailey is joining the FBI,” he finished with a wink toward you.

As they turned to leave, you couldn't help but feel grateful for the friends who always knew how to lighten the mood, even in the most awkward situations. As you snuggled back into Jay's arms, you felt a surge of passion coursing through your veins, igniting a fire that had been smoldering between you since the moment you first met.

With a mischievous glint in his eye, Jay turned to you, his gaze filled with desire. "Well, that was unexpected," he whispered, his voice husky with longing.

You couldn't help but smile at the intensity of his gaze, feeling a rush of heat spreading through your body at the thought of being so close to him again. "Unexpected, but not unwelcome," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

As Jay leaned in to capture your lips in a searing kiss, you melted into his embrace, the passion between you igniting like wildfire. In that moment, all the doubts and uncertainties melted away, leaving only the burning desire that had brought you back together.

“I’m insatiable, sorry.”

“No need to apologize. That makes two of us, sweetheart,” he responded, brushing curls from your face. His heart warmed that he was able to hold you this way. Jay had missed the feel of your skin and moving the hair from your vision. “You might want to put your bonnet on this time. I don’t want to get in trouble for ruining your hair, love.”

“Smart man, Mr. Halstead,” you giggled, leaving feathery kisses along his jaw.

And as the passion between you intensified, you couldn't help but joke, "Maybe it's just the pregnancy hormones," eliciting a laugh from both Jay and yourself, knowing that the truth was far deeper than a mere hormonal surge.

How y’all feeling about this one? I hope I did Mr. Halstead justice. Be sure to comment and reblog lovelies🩵.

Tagging a few lovelies🩵:

@darqchilddaydreamz @sunshine-flower @astoldbychae @1andonlytashae @alertyoulikeitsamber @thirtysomethinganduncensored @starrynite7114

[brotherscain]

precanon wincest hair washing drabble, 2.3k, teenchesters/weecest

The hunt that night went well. Dad had this shifter pinned under his thumb since the first night in town, all they had to do was get to the thing and kill it dead.

If Dad had only brought Dean along, they would’ve weeded it out a day earlier. He wanted Sam in on this one, though, and Sam was still new enough at hunting to warrant a training wheels protocol. It had to be nearest to a sure thing as they could hope doing what they did. And it was. For Sam—for John and Dean right there with him—it was no question. Dean staked the final blow, gravely recognizing it kept Sam from being a killer for however longer.

In the car, John stretched his hand behind Dean’s head and scruffed his nape firmly enough to jostle him. Father to son, man to emerging man. Dad smiled, disheveled and not quite happy, but proud. He wore it to glance at Dean, then Sam. Proud and grateful.

“You boys did good tonight.” John served up no elaboration, he didn’t need to. Dean let the praise wheedle its way into him. He wanted to look over at Sam but didn’t because he knew Sam had already forged himself indifferent to Dad’s opinion. Dean wanted to enjoy it for a second longer, Sam wouldn’t get it.

Back in the motel lot, Dad fished his pocket for a few crumpled bills to give Dean. “Why don’t you take your brother to the vending machines? I’ll unload.” Dad stopped giving them so much junk food change right around the time Sam started wearing Dean’s too small hand-me-downs. Tonight he prompted Dean almost like he had a thousand times years ago, to a different kid.

Dean’s door creaked on its hinge, Sam’s following moments later. An ease settled over Dean. Everyone made it out okay. Dad wasn’t losing his head bunting orders at them about what they should’ve done better. Sam likewise kept whatever brewing comments he had under the lid. Dean figured he could count on at least one of the lit up vending machines having a Reese’s. As far as hunts went, it could’ve been a lot worse. They did do good.

The vending machine’s artificial blue-white beam bugged every so often, dimming before a kick-start into throbbing fluorescence. Sam scuffed his beat up sneakers against the pavement directly in front of it, eyeing up the options and sticking an open palm out in Dean’s direction. Dean slapped a bill down into his waiting hand.

He watched Sam hunch to look down at the buttons while punching in a code. Off behind him, Dad lifted a bag over his shoulder and reached inside the Impala for a second one. All around them cicadas chirped over one another and the night swelled with trapped mugginess. Dean thought about melted chocolate on his fingers and instead of feeding the leftover change into the slot, he stuffed it all in his back pocket.

Sam straightened to his full height, lifted the chilly soda can closer and tapped on the top rim three times before cracking it open. It burst in loud fizzy pops. Sam tipped his head back to swing a short, gulping chug. This way Dean could see parts of Sam in a new light. Small spatters of dried blood flecked the underside of his bottom jaw, a shiny red sheen bloomed on the high swell of his cheekbone. Dean kept himself from lacing his fingers through Sam’s hair, but made a face at the matted mess of it.

“You have monster guts in your hair,” he said, staring as Sam used the back of his limp hand to wipe the carbonated trickle from his mouth. Sam felt around his head curiously, coming away with a tacky coat of muddy crimson and a grimace. Dean laughed at him, couldn’t help but to. “That’s gonna be a bitch to get out, man.”

Sam cut a glare Dean’s way. He was extremely touchy after hunts, and Dean knew better than to prod him. Knowing better didn’t make it any less funny. That was Sam’s fault.

“Eat me,” he threw back dryly, annoyed Dean had the nerve to carry around a sense of humor about these things.

Sam wet his caked hand with driblets sweating off the soda can and cracked a small grin. Before Dean thought a little smarter about what that meant, Sam was dragging the mess all down the side of his shirt. Not that it hadn’t already been stained and ruined with a lot worse, that’s not what mattered. It was his snot-nosed brother thinking he could retaliate.

Dean jumped on him seconds after, first by shoving him away hard, then fisting the ribbed collar of his tee and tugging him closer. This past year Sam’s gone through a growth spurt, shot straight up like a beanstalk, but he still only came up to Dean’s shoulders. Between that and his knock kneed gangliness, Dean could still push and tilt and trip him any way he wanted. His shirt twisted up in Dean’s grip against the current of Sam’s squirming to get away. They were laughing together or maybe just panting or maybe they weren’t making any noises at all except for their shoes on the ground and their hands nipping each other’s skin. Dean thought about wrestling him to the concrete and shoving his face into all the boot prints. It would be easier to wrangle the drink out of his hands and spill it down his boxers. In all its sloshing, it had already splashed them enough times Dean could smell the cola while it dried sticky.

A door opened and shut firmly somewhere close in the long line of identical rooms. Dean didn’t really care to stop their roughhousing until the commanding voice boomed out. “Boys!” Dean positioned ramrod straight, Sam’s shoulders hunched while he uselessly looked to iron out all the wrinkles in his shirt. Dad waited for Sam to finally glance up. He was going to chew them out for being so loud at the late hour, for acting like mutts more than sternly raised men.

None of that happened. Dad stalked a few steps closer to the parked car, raising a brow at them as a wry smirk fixed itself to his face. “Gonna pick up some dinner. You boys get cleaned up before I get back.” He was in good spirits, but it was still a demand all the same.

“Yes sir,” Dean shot off. Sam didn’t say anything, only nodded his head to show he’d heard and understood. And if it had been a worse night Dad would call him out on it, start a whole thing that didn’t need to be started. Dean felt lucky when Dad just tapped the roof a few times before getting in.

In between the engine roaring to life and tires crunching gravel, Sam stuck Dean in the side with his pointy elbow. “Your bet?”

Dean zoned out on the glowing tail lights, thinking. “Burgers,” he finally said, blinking back to Sam. “Yours?”

Sam drew in a heaving breath before pressing his lips together. “Chinese.” They used to bet each other’s left overs on it. Now it’s habit enough just to go through the motions.

Mosquitoes ate him alive, buzzed around the lip of Sam’s drink enough to keep him from sipping any more. He really was a mess. Hair knotted in clumps, face scratched up. Sam wouldn’t mind until he saw all of it in the mirror and remembered other kids his age didn’t track monsters down for a living. Then he’d get all huffy for first dibs on a very long shower and not want to talk much the rest of the night. There was no such thing as a good hunt in Sam’s eyes.

“Come on.” Dean bobbed his head in the direction of their room. “First shower’s yours.”

Inside the A/C churned cool air out through a low and steady humming. It was prone to spit water out, so Dean couldn’t comfortably sit in front of it and soak up the chill. He dropped himself down on the couch and sprawled out, feeling gross and mucky but sated somewhere deep in the pit of his belly.

Sam dug through some bags and came out with a fresh pair of boxers, a towel, and some small miscellaneous bottles. He padded in a direction opposite the shower, Dean didn’t have the energy to search his motive out. But then Sam was behind him, gazing down at him without saying a word. He’d taken his shirt off and since neither bothered turning on any lights when they were walked in, the moon pooled shimmering light across his chest as it fell and rose strongly.

“There won’t be enough time,” he said, keeping his voice soft. “Not for both of us before he gets back.”

The solution was easy. It was what it was. Sam knew that as well as Dean. “Okay Sam,” Dean replied slowly. Sam had red marks down the base of his throat, and Dean wondered if that was from earlier tonight or left hy him near the vending machine.

Sam didn’t break their tense staring, but he did inhale a terser breath. “Are you going to make me say it?” He didn’t look pained either way, only impatient and intentionally guarded.

“What are you talking about?” Dean still asked anyway. Like he didn’t intimately know. Like he didn’t lay awake thinking about it a lot more than he should, when Sam would look for him next. Ask for him. And pretending not to know should’ve made it easier, too. To stop letting it happen. But it didn’t.

Sam became fed up with Dean’s pretending. “There won’t be any warm water left for you.” He took off, headed toward the bathroom without turning around or faltering even once.

A panic peeled the skin from around the achy center of Dean’s chest, awoke the crescendo of its relentless pounding. It felt worse than anything Dean’s ever felt before, and it was always the same at this crossroads. One day he should see if it kills him in letting it run its course. One day, maybe.

“Sam.” Dean caught him as Sam’s finger flipped the light switch. “Okay.” He nodded and got up, trying not to give away his shakiness, hoping Sam would still wait.

They shut the door and turned off the flickering light since there was a window in here, too. The bathroom didn’t make space for two people, but neither of them wanted it anyway now that Dean had given in. He brushed past Sam’s warmed skin to turn the shower knob. Then he worked around Sam’s form, pressing into it, to get to the sink. He tried avoiding his own reflection as he bent for a drink of tap water.

Sam set down his things and caged Dean in from behind, his hands finding the hem of Dean’s top, skirting along and underneath it to dance goosebumps across his abdomen. He moved up, up, up. Traced the thick chain of Dean’s amulet, had it bouncing subtly off the plane between his ribs.

Dean rocked back against him, to push him off more than anything. But he was still trying to be gentle. He didn’t want Sam to get the wrong idea. Dean was here, he was with Sam. But— “Get in, it feels nice,” he whispered, pebble skipping his gaze around his baby brother’s face. “Let me wash you.”

Sam understood and found Dean’s eyes before tipping his head in agreement. He stripped completely bare, tapped Dean’s arm to let him through and allowed Dean to pull the curtain back for him. Sam closed his eyes under the stream, loosed some of the tension his body clung to.

Dean got to work, shrugging his top off before reaching for the shampoo bottle, squeezing a dollop into his palm and rubbing his hands together to coat them. “C’mere,” he murmured, even though he helped guide Sam close enough.

It had started when they were both younger, because Sam couldn’t do these kinds of things by himself yet but Dean could. Then, somewhere in all the gunk of their lives, it grew on them. There was routine in it; Sam would shut his eyes tight, roll his neck this way and that as Dean’s sudsy hands directed him, and they tried not to talk too much. Both began to understand there were going to be things Dad just shouldn’t know about.

Dean stayed careful around the tangles, worked them out with his fingers as gently as he could. Sam never winced or whined about it anymore or anything, but Dean couldn’t kick the habit. He threaded his hands through its soapy slickness, dug in by the base of his neck, eased the notches out.

Sam hummed and sighed, drooped and sagged. Content. His hand circled around Dean’s wrist for no reason other than to feel him.

Sometimes, more often than Dean could confess, it grew into more than this. Dean would undress himself, Sam would coax him under the water with him. They’d roam and glide their touch all over their slippery bodies. Tonight they would need to be quick, quicker than usual. So Dean crept in and pressed his chest to Sam’s back and scrubbed them both down without meaning to linger very often. Sam turned his cheek to Dean’s shoulder, pressed his open mouth to the wet flesh and scraped his teeth against him lightly. They were both close to hard, but there wasn’t time and Dean tried to believe it wasn’t about them, only bodies and their closeness.

Dean got to fooling himself this was better, as long as it was just this. Eventually he’d have the willpower to deny it altogether. Eventually.

[bayporwave]

Before the students left Rek, the rakii had been in the process of developing their own AI. At first they were gifted such intelligence by the students, providing washed-down copies of themselves to add to their tech and craft management. But when the need for more personalized AI and general curiosity arose, they went to work, using the student provided AI as a base or reference point. From there, three types of AI sprouted off these projects: • Student AI - Highly valuable, practical holy relics of what remains of the students. These are "purest" AI and are strictly held within Iot's control, only able to function off student tech. There are only 4 existing and 2 remain within the Idle Library. These AI are again, much more watered-down and while are fairly sentient they aren't 100% sapient.

• Hybrid or Steward AI - A mix between student and rakii coding. Since rakii couldn't exactly copy paste the student AI's themselves, what was given, they managed add on it. These AI were specialized and trained to understand the workings of rakii history, and language, while also being able to work on both student and rakii devices. They are still held under Iot control but with special permission, they can be granted to important government official or funded servers. These AI are a tad more self-aware, understanding their purpose and history just fine.

• Factotum AI - Completely rakii made and trained AI. With little to no student involvement, these AI are either standard algorithmic run assistants or commercially used for things like personal computers, phones, self-driven vehicles (mainly rail cars and public transit) or vending machines. Not ALL devices have AI of course, as the general public have a lot of mixed feelings towards, not such distain but prefer to be the only one in control of their tools. On the upside, they are heavily regulated and lack any possibility for self-awareness or sapience. The ones displayed here are two steward AI named Wyrr'Yoii (left) and Booror (right). Wyrr'Yoii is currently housed on the lunar settlement, Wubu maintaining life support and security, taking the avatar of a temperate. They were handed over to the rakii aerospace committee by Iot, which is heavily funded by the city for the investment of seeking out their missing gods. Wyrr'Yoii is described to be standardly monotone and critical, yet easy-going and understanding. They know exactly where their functionally lies and are always willing to lookout for the inhabitants within them. They have long-range communication with ground control, and furthest orbiting station in their system, "The Needle of Shwati" (A Wubu settler checking in with Wyrr'Yoii)

Booror, is housed within an arctic government building in the Shto Dominion hence taking an arctic avatar. Having accepted trading offers and territory with Iot, they were later granted a steward to keep purpose tabs and documents on community. Ensuring those higher up are up-to-date with any possible trading changes. Though the general public are often wary of this development as recently there has been a project in the works of providing AI with RC units, wanting to see how these AI can interact with the physical world. One unit being an elaborate success, however the reactions of many were generally, "It looks creepy." and it became more of an underground project. (Cartographer Wa'chaa "Quiibii" Iot, speaking with Saiba in their RC unit)

[crosshairs-dumb-pimp-gf]

Tah'nyem Ra and the Diamond Dolls in:

Before Tahny met Crosshair, there was the Diamond Dolls...

War is afoot, but this trio is determined to enjoy themselves. The diamond dolls are together again and plan to raise havoc once more on the darkened streets of the city planet. Join these mean girls on a fast paced romp and take a look at a day in the life of Tah'nyem Ra.

Content Warnings: F/F oral, Casual Poly Relationships, Language, Alcohol, Car Wrecks, Cops, Questionable Political Actions.

Authors Note: If you saw this posted before, haha no you didn't! I wanted to give Disgrace readers a little back content on Tahny as we go into the second half of the story. Kahtzi has also done a lovely job of haunting the narrative for someone who's perfectly alive so I wanted to give her some screen time. AND MORE JAR'ATH. This story is pretty brief, but life goes fast on Coruscant.

I was gonna save this for New Years but Kark it, Happy OC Sunday.

Word Count: 3720

Read on Ao3 - Read Disgrace

Spice Directly Under Cut, Ye be Warned.

This one has no specific song, take Tahny's personal playlist:

The pale purple thighs around my ears tensed and Kahtzi sighed, encouraging me to increase the pace of my tongue against her. She gasped, but it wasn't from me,

“Teeny we're gonna be late!”

I looked up at her showing me the time on her datapad. She was right, Jar’ath would be landing soon. 

“Just concentrate, you know what you're like if you don't cum before we go out.”

I leaned back into her.

“Maybe some strange dick might be good for me tonight,”

She giggled peevishly, making me glare up at her. 

“Not for free it's not,”

I was sick of wasting time, and suctioned her between my lips. Hallowing my cheeks I flicked my tongue rapidly against her button, making her curse and jerk under me. With her full attention now on her cunt she bucked her hips against me, losing herself to the hard, impatient licking. Polished hooves dug into my back where her legs were wrapped about me and she came, writhing a few seconds as her voice caught in a strangled squeal. 

Then we were done. 

I pinched her thigh and hopped up to run to the fresher to wash and get dressed. It had been forever since I'd left Ga'hah and I was looking forward to reuniting with my childhood friend. 

On my way to the shower I scooped up articles here and there to make an outfit, tossing the thigh holster and grapple I kept at Kahtzi’s on top. 

“Are you really bringing that thing?”

Kahtzi sighed, amused as she watched me dart about while brushing out her vibrant pink hair. 

“Of course! What's a night out without it?”

“Peaceful,”

She shot back with a giggle. 

~~~

The busy port was packed with people and I was annoyed. We could have all just met at the private port the nuvvy wuds of Coruscant had for their fancy luxury ships but no~, Jar'ath had to make an entrance for his… audience. 

“DOLL face!”

The shrill voice rang across the hall, cutting through the din in a practiced projection. Challenging me to meet his spectacle, Jar'ath sashayed into view, high collar glittering a black on black sheen that contrasted the hot pink stocking the cutout bodysuit snapped around. Shiney thigh high boots tapped smartly on the floor as he flung his arms out to me… still about ten meters away. 

“Oh, you absolute slut!” 

I shouted back liltingly as I met his gate and approached. Eyes turned to us from all corners of the common hanger, the obnoxious colors of Jar'ath's presentation clashing with the loose draped cloth that clung to my body as we hugged. 

Jar’ath kissed my cheek then pushed me back by my shoulders to look at the handkerchief hemmed top and skirt that draped my form in shiny black and deep wine reds. 

“Little T, we have to update your wardrobe.”

“This is perfectly modern, and custom made mind you,”

“You look like a grandma,”

He snorted as Kahtzi caught up to us, soda canister in hand from the vending machine off to the side of the crowded incoming hall. 

“THAT'S how Grandmas be dressin’ on Ga'hah?”

She glanced down at my bare midriff and high cut slits on the short skirt, lending ample glances of my legs and a glimpse of the holster strap over my own leather, thigh top heels. 

“Mhmm,”

Jar'ath leaned into her, whispering teasingly,

“to funerals,”

Kahtzi furrowed her brow, never really being able to tell when the tookish gremlin was lying to her. I could just about yank that braid of his. He turned back to me,

“AND you actually lopped off all that hair, I can't believe it, your Vah'hadarr must be all a tizzy,”

“Oh, he's not happy about it, but he'll deal. It's not like we're on Ga'hah,”

I swept my hand over the patch of black hair now visible under the short bob of white. 

“Mm, not as brave a move out here on the big planets is it, little miss rebel?”

But his unflappable composure broke a moment as he self consciously tucked a lock from his bangs behind an ear… the ear his single streak of black sprouted. 

“Alright alright,”

I cut in, pulling a flask tucked against the inner thigh of my boot discreetly. Kahtzi popped the soda and took a big swig before offering the opening to me. I leveled the canister with alcohol from my stash before tucking it out of sight again.

“To the Diamond Dolls! Together for some havoc at last!”

I took a big swig, grimacing at the burn and shoving the drink to the other two. 

“Mm,”

Jar'ath wiped his mouth handing the drink off to Kahtzi,

“Where to, Tiny? It's your graduation party, you better have better drinks than this planned,”

“Oh!”

Kahtzi piped up, she had downed half the soda by now. 

“We're near that, that little novelty joint, yeah? The soldier bar?”

Jar'ath and I made a face,

“The clone bar?”

The new establishment was a sister to the floor we refurbished in the tower to service the instant army of cloned soldiers trickling into their fresh deployments. Most of the ones hanging around were cops. 

“Puh-lease, Kitty baby, tell me Teeny got you off before coming out here,”

“Don't worry Rathy, she's clear headed… ish, and we won't be going to a narc bar either, Be'llahl Kahtzi…”

“What's wrong with the narc bar?”

I turned to her with exasperation. She clearly forgot the spice I had tucked in my boot. 

~~~

The bars on the lower levels were always cloudy with a haze of death sticks and spice. Sabbac played openly on the dented and scarred table tops to much groaning and whoops of victory. It smelt like smoke and stale fermented grain from years of spilt pints. The familiarity of the seedy atmosphere soaked into me like a warm blanket. 

I scanned over to where Kahtzi was putting on a show of ‘dumb diva’ at one of the more spirited card circles, hoping she wouldn't take it too far. Men didn't mind losing a few credits just to sit at the table with the beautiful Theelin, but if they made it too easy for her she’d have a hard time not leaving with their keys and mortgage. 

Jar'ath had already snuck off to a darker corner with his own prize. 

Hopping off where I leaned on the wall I wove to the jukebox, popping in a credit to select an old favorite before finding a better perch at the bar to observe the crowd. 

“Isn't your friend over there Kahtzi Zho?”

A patron with liquor on his breath leaned in for his query. He wasn't bad looking, speaking with some charm despite his obvious intoxication. His friends giggled, probably thinking him a fool. 

“She gets that a lot,”

A little miffed we'd have to hop to the next location sooner than planned, I discreetly signaled to Kahtzi to wrap up her games. The common pedestrian wouldn't recognize the pin up model, but those who did would really, really recognize her. I watched from the corner of my eye as she untangled herself and slipped off to find Jar'ath. 

“Let me buy a round of drinks, for you and your… your nympho friends,”

More sniggering from the charming group as my new acquaintance signaled the barkeep who, quicker than usual, started whipping together some colorful spirits. 

“You know, I drive a T90 Visper… it's right outside, maybe we should go on a ride you and I,”

The drinks were set in front of me as I felt a hand settle high on my thigh. I flicked my eyes behind me to check on Kahtzi's progress before letting myself bristle. She had Jar’ath and they were nearly back to the exit of the establishment… time to go. 

With a steady hand I swiped up the overly full glass and smiled at my unwanted companion, 

“Never gonna happen,”

Slowly, deliberately, I tilted the cup, dumping its contents on the man's lap and giving it a shake for good measure. 

He sat stunned for a moment, looking between his soaked crotch and my broad grin. His friends breaking into gufaws and jeers broke him from his stupor. 

“Why you little nerf!”

I was already gone, the insult hitting my back as the three of us fell through the door and onto the foggy street giggling. 

Looking around I tried to plan our next move, there wouldn't be time to call my driver back before those bantha brains followed us out here. 

Then I spotted the T90 Visper. 

“Jar’ath, we're taking that one,”

I gestured to the nicer vehicle, obviously with some restricted modifications. Jar'aths face lit up as we jumped into the seats. Kahtzi was already in the wires by the time my butt hit the middle bench between them but it looked like she was struggling. 

“Hey!”

A familiar voice called out from the direction of the bar entrance. None of us turned to look, instead Jar'ath let out an exasperated huff and leaned over my lap to help get the car started. 

“I thought I taught you girls this,”

He yanked the wires from Kahtzi’s grip, severing them with a deft claw. 

“Strip the ends, red touches black-”

The speeder sprung to life with a purr. 

“HEY!”

Louder now and with a percussion of footfalls as the group sped up to stop us. 

Kahtzi floored it, steering us into traffic as we jeered at the owner of our stolen ride, disappearing into the stream of vehicles. 

I leaned back in the seat between my friends, lacing my hands behind my head. 

“We still have a couple hours before we have to open The Crown, where should we go? Another bar?”

Jar'aths face brightened,

“Oo, is the Jedi temple nearby? I've always wanted to tempt a Jedi,”

I wrinkled my nose at the suggestion. First Kahtzi with clones and now Jar’ath with Jedi. 

“C’mon Rathy, they're not that hard to tempt… they think theres no attachment to casual sex so they're pretty quick to give in,”

“Still sounds like a good time,”

“Sure if you like self flagellation,”

He waggled his brow grinning,

“Maybe I do-”

The banter was cut short by a blaster bolt ricocheting off the back of the head rest. 

“What the varp?!”

I turned to look behind us, catching a glimpse of our friends from the bar… they had followed. 

“Kark. that.”

Shifting in the seat to kneel backwards I tugged at the grappling gun at my thigh. 

“Oh, Teeny, your no good with that thing,”

The Theelin planted her hoof on the pedal to up the pace, attempting to discourage me from my line of thinking. I swung the gun up, haphazardly aiming behind us at our pursuers. 

“Teeny, no!”

Kahtzi chided,

“Teeny, YES!”

Jar'ath countered.

I let out my breath and pulled the trigger. 

The little suction cup shot out at the following speeder as they shifted into the lane right behind us, finding a purchase to adhere itself onto the vehicle's front bumper. 

“My stars you actually hit them,”

No time to address Jar'ath’s backhanded admiration or my own surprise. Before the cable could go taught I slammed the gun through one of the brace handles in the console. Kahtzi protested as I reached over her and yanked the steering, whipping us ninety degrees onto a new street. 

The cable caught on a lamp post, biting into its metal body as it went taught. Inertia pulled the crowded speeder behind us hurling them into the corner of the building bordering our side street. They hit with a crunch and a small blast of heat. 

A small spark of victory lit through me…

Before the cable tightened again, yanking us hard to the left and slamming the nose of the Visper into a barrier. 

~~~

I stared down the patrol droid on the other side of the hologram sheen of our holding cell. 

“You're gonna regret this,”

“I'm sure I will,”

The hollow voice buzzed back. I huffed and turned back to pacing. Kahtzi and Jar'ath had given up protesting and were instead amusing themselves by making out on the stiff bench lining the back of the small cubby. I rolled my eyes, turning to catch the droid scanning over my friends. 

“Eyes to yourself, droid,”

“As if I'd want to look at you disgusting flesh bags,”

It turned and paced back down the hall. 

Some minutes passed. The smacking sound from the bench became more obnoxious as the pair got bored and started to shift their attention to annoying me. It was working. 

As my spine began to crawl I was snapped back to attention at the smart tap of dress shoes on the cheap flooring accompanying the returning metal footfalls. 

A tall man came into view, white hair slicked back over his ears to loosely fall from the braid hanging down his back. It contrasted his tanned skin pinched right around glaring amber eyes. His dress was formal, sleek black and white suite of the well to do Coruscant elite.

“Va'hah!”

I sighed in relief, once again leaning into the sheen of the holo barrier. Jar'ath and Kahtzi hopped up at the sound of it powering off and a click of admonishment from my father's tongue. 

“Tah’nyem… I would have expected a better show of restraint,”

“I'm plenty restrained, Va’hah… those guys had it coming and-”

He pinched his brow, snapping,

“What do I expected of a girl who still calls me ‘Va’hah’ like a youngling,”

I rocked back, tightening my jaw as I was pushed back forward by my friends rushing out and into the hall.

“Thankies Va’hah!”

Jar'ath shot glibly as he and Kahtzi held hands and skipped towards the precinct exit. I fell in step with my father who continued his chiding in a low whisper. 

“I shouldn't have to remind you that we're guest of the Republic Tah’nyem, with the war they're staging… a stunt like yours could make things difficult for our family, next time it won't be droids dragging you in but cloned guards,”

He sighed, expression softening,

“I'm surprised to see Jar’ath here… I hope you haven't forgotten our engagements for tomorrow,”

“Of course not, Vah'hadarr.”

I had. 

“Good… then I expect you back at the estate tonight, after opening ceremonies you come straight home, tomorrow is too important to risk any more… dalliances.”

We exited the station and with a nod, my father peeled away from me. He whispered something to my waiting driver before stepping into his own vehicle and peeling off. 

I hurried to my own speeder where my friends were already piling in. We had to get to The Crown. 

~~~

“Isn't this a little… gouache?”

Jar'ath leaned against the boudoir mirror flipping a mock clone helmet in his hands. He was in the way and I swatted his thigh so I could freshen my makeup. The rows of lighting glinted wildly off the shiny white plastiod. 

“It might be ‘gouache’ but that government contract is important, The floor downstairs isn't going to pay for itself,”

He snorted and handed the helmet back to Kahtzi. She wore the scandalously modified armor well… I would've been a nightmare trying to fit those tits under the breastplate mold we were sent. She turned to me looking puzzled,

“Jar'ath kind of has a point, will the soldiers ever even see this little… performance,”

I sighed, this didn't matter and we were going to be on soon. Kahtzi better have the dance down. 

“We perform like we're supposed too, everyone goes home feeling a little better about the war and the government subsidizes the brothel for the soldiers… that's all we have to worry about,”

Jar'ath snipped again,

“So it's true? These clones won't even get paid in real credits? I thought the Republic was all… anti-slavery,”

“Yeah well, show me a government that isn't laced with hypocrisy,”

A light started to blink, and Kahtzi straighted, getting into line at the jet lift. I looked in the mirror one last time, straightening my Lieutenant’s cap before following.

Jar'ath wiggled his fingers in parting as the jet engaged. I felt the lift under myself and the other dancers, propelling us up through the floor above and into the bright, colorful lights of the main stage. 

I let training kick in as the roar of applause rushed through my core, making me feel light from adrenaline. The show’s started… everyone should know their role from here.  

~~~

I blinked in the rays of sun breaking the skyline as our townspeed made its way to the senate building. Anyone being up this early was criminal and yet, here I am. This had to be how they kept the common folk out of their petty squabbling… scheduling conflicts. 

My father was saying something. I wasn't listening, but I was supposed to be.

“... The timing has to be right, Tah’nyem, it's of the utmost importance,”

“Yeah, yeah, I got it Va’hah,”

“You had better,”

I'm sure I knew what he meant, I had rehearsed the plan a few times on my own.

“You know, Tah’nyem… I really wish you'd return the Duhanis boy’s calls,”

I stiffened, not holding back on the look of disgust that twisted my features.

“Oh, don't make a face, I'll start to take it personally… the Bur’nyt reminds me of myself at that age,”

My expression only became more exaggerated, making my father chuckle. 

“The union is only symbolic li’ha, The second richest family on Ga’hah? That'd be good for us, I expect you to reconsider your personal feelings on the matter,”

I bit the inside of my cheek and glowered. 

Luckily, we had arrived at our destination. I tried to swallow the indignation threatening to boil up my throat as we were shown into the tall, elegant building. My attention was brought above me. 

Almost higher than I could make out, the conspicuous glint of white flashed occasionally as patrols and guards monitored the courtyard we were entering through. The armor matched what we received for our floor show. Clone soldiers, already flooding into the capital.  I found myself hoping I would never have to get closer than this. 

Then we were inside, our footsteps being muffled by thick carpeting. It smelt of burning dust, as all government buildings seemed too, but the decor was far more sophisticated than the occasion precinct or two I frequented. 

“Ah, Mr. Ra, so glad you could join us today,”

An official looking protocol droid met us at the landing, rattling off a recorded greeting from whoever had set up for my father to speak today. I wasn't interested, instead, paying attention to the halls and floors we passed as we were led further through the building. 

There is it, showtime.

My eyes flicked to my father's and he nodded subtly as I discreetly fell back behind our procession and peeled off to the corridor we had just passed. Evening out to a casual pace, I tried to hurry down the hall towards my target. 

Senator Challma should be ordering his pre-hearing drink right about now. 

On queue a girl holding a tray emerged into the hall with the hiss of a door, bubbling glass of purple liquid carefully balanced on its surface. 

Perfect. 

I followed. 

She eventually stopped by a booth door, and buzzed its intercom. A pallid looking man answered, taking the drink with an impatience he barely kept in check. 

Challma had been talking out on the inclusion of booze and am msex work in the funding for soldier enrichment, claiming that the loose morality would rub off on their ‘perfect’ weapons and make them… worse? As if less sex made men better fighters. 

Idiot. 

As the girl left down the hall I fell into the door before it could hiss shut again, pressing into the older man with a shocked expression twisting his features. 

I giggled, a vapid, uncontrolled slurring giggle. 

“Whoopsie, I think I'm lost,”

“You started early didn't you?”

He looked amused but uncomfortable, very aware of my body pressed against his. He was a married man after all. 

“Can I sit here? I need a minute…”

I pouted, hanging on him desperately to sell the intoxication. 

“Uh… I suppose,”

Good. I wouldn't need to drag him. 

He turned us and angled me into the seat on the hover disc. As he dislodged my arm from about his waist, about to straighten, I blew the sedation powder into his eyes. His body slumped over me heavily and I huffed from the weight.

Time to get to work. 

I subtly nudged him into a more natural looking position, careful not to alert the booths around me. Hopefully, if they did look, the illusion would hold. For the finishing touch, I undid my top a little, sliding his hand in to cup my breast and tilted his face against my neck. 

With my hidden hand I held the revigor poised. Waiting for my queue. 

The senate proceeding had already started as I got into my position and now I tuned in, listening. 

“Now, to speak on these proceedings we call on Senator Challma of Kerntak to the floor for opening arguments,”

I held my breath. Not yet. 

“Senator Challma,”

Wait. 

“Senator Challma?”

I could hear the buzz of the scanner droids approaching. My time to shine.

The revigor capsule popped in my hand as the droids came within range. 

Challma reeled, bucking involuntarily away from the harsh compound… only making things look worse for himself. 

There were gasps as the booth was projected for all to see. The upright Challma pinning a young woman to a seat in his senate booth, hands down her shirt. I did my best to mimic his surprise as I hurriedly untangled myself and darted back into the hall. 

Mission accomplished.

I left the building quickly, leaving my father to his meetings. My shoulders relaxed as soon as my feet hit the walkways outside. Morning sun hit my face and the smell of caf was on the breeze. 

Maybe I won't go back to Kahtzi’s just yet. 

As I turned my feet towards the siren call of a morning beverage, I could just feel it in my bones. 

Today's gonna be a good karken day. 

----------------------------------------

Tags: @feral-ferrule @cloneflo99

[the-fiction-witch]

Laundry

Media The Queens Gambit

Character Benny Watts

Couple Benny X Reader

Rating Flirty

I was sitting on the small ottomans in the basement that Benny called home, Next week was Paris and we were going together as Co-Champions this year. He had graciously offered his apartment so I didn't have to book a hotel so we could train and prep for the games ahead. Plus I wanted to come to New York for some shopping anyway. But this place isn't exactly what I imagined... then again now thinking about it, I'm not sure I did imagine Benny to live any better than this, but it's just a little jarring when it's true. I glanced away from my book and looked around the grey dimly lit basement, the shower in the corner, no sofa, frosted window to the bedroom, the kitchen not much more than a fridge, a counter and a single stovetop. And there he sat utterly in his element at his table no shoes but still black socks, his dark jeans his belt sat comfortably his knife in its holster, a black t-shirt with his green textured shirt on over it with the sleeves rolled up, his chains against his chest and his arms, rings across his fingers, he sat his coffee cup on the table fixed his facial hair and focused back to his board moving the piece he had been contemplating for the last ten minutes.

"Benny?" I asked

"Yeah?" He asks glancing up

"I don't mean to ... pry into your personal business -"

"But you're going to?"

"I am going to," I nodded "Do you actually live like this?"

"Yeah?"

"This isn't like some elaborate prank? And this is like where you store your chess board or something and you actually have a decent semi-detached townhouse in Queens?" I asked

"You're really struggling with this aren't you?"

"I'm just... curious."

"I like it"

"I mean I know New York isn't the cheapest place but..."

"But ?"

"But come on. I cannot repeat this enough: your shower is next to your fridge. You wash your ass beside where you make food. You have a window in your bedroom. That's not wallpaper that's just concrete"

"I like it"

"Really? Because I'm pretty sure you can afford better"

"Are you now?"

"We're co-companions I know how much you earn. Unless you're getting a bonus because of your additional appendage"

"Appendage?" He asked looking confused

"Your penis"

"Oh. No y/n, price money does not differ between appendages"

"Every other job I've ever worked does"

"The chess federation doesn't give a damn about appendages y/n"

"Still..."

"I like this place"

"...that brings up a good point actually... I'm not seeing a washing machine. Anywhere?"

"No,"

"Is there... a secret Washing machine?"

"No"

"Okay, do you need to go to someplace in the building and do laundry?"

"You wanna do some laundry?"

"Yes please"

"Alright, get your stuff," he says getting up and heading into his room, I gathered my laundry unsure what to do with it all and he returned with a large drawstring bag "Throw your stuff in here," he says dropping it on the floor with a thud

"In there?"

"Yeah"

I pulled the bag a little to peek inside "Ahhh I'm not putting my laundry in with yours!"

"Why not?"

"Because that's gross!"

"But we're taking it to clean? So what does it matter?"

"It just does Benny!"

"You can put it in the bag or you can carry all your laundry by hand, up to you"

I sighed and out of my clothes, getting my bag and my shoes as he got his shoes and his jacket grabbing the bag and putting it over his shoulder

"Come on then," he says heading out so I followed him he locked the door behind us and we headed up to the dirty New York streets I followed him down the pavement past cars and trash bags for a good while, it felt like we'd been walking forever at least ten blocks by now until finally we arrived at a little hole in the wall laundromat between a record store and a pizza place we headed inside and it was much as you'd expect a little place with a line of washers on one side and dryers on the other a few tables and chairs in the middle and the back wall has a few vending machines on it and a change machine in the centre.

"This is where you do laundry?"

"Well yeah?" He shrugs slipping his jacket off throwing it over a chair and bumping the bag In Front of a machine heading to the back getting change from the machine "You can pop the first load on" he says throwing me a coin from the machine

"I am not touching your underwear"

"I didn't ask you to,"

I sighed and put the first of what I'm sure will be many loads in "washing powder?" I asked

"Uhhh cherry blossom, clean linin, or tropical?"

"Whatever cheapest"

"They all the same"

"Cherry"

"Alright, here," he says getting it from the machine and throwing it over so I put the laundry on and sit at the table

"So we're just gonna sit here all day?"

"Yep"

"Why not go back to the basement?'

"Because by the time you walk back to the apartment, it'll be time to turn around and walk back and the machine will just have finished" he explained sitting down too "It's up to you"

"Fine" I sighed "Why do you come here though? It's dead and it's so far from your apartment? You're not telling me this is the only laundromat in New York?"

"I like this place, it's quiet. Everything is machined so I don't have to deal with people, it's cheap, and the place next door does great pizza"

"The more I get to know you the weirder I think you are Benny" I sighed

"Thanks?"

'It wasn't a compliment"

"I'm taking it as one" he shrugs getting a deck box from his jacket pocket opening it up pulling out a very nice deck of cards which he shuffled in his hand "You can pick"

"Poker"

"AHH nothing to bet with I don't play poker unless I'm better try again'

"fine rummy then" I answered so he shuffled and dealt the cards letting us play for a while "Why do you use this place? really?" I asked as he put the next load on

"You really wanna know?" He sighed

"Yeah,"

"Fine" He sighed sitting back in his seat, "The Guy who owns this place, and the two places next door"

"The pizza and the record store?"

"Yeah, he's also my landlord"

"Okay..."

"So long as I pay my rent I get free pizza and free records, he even takes money off my rent when I do my laundry here"

"Hu... What a nice man"

"Yeah he's great, and I like helping him out. he's doing his best to make it on his own and get out of the family business"

I was confused a moment before it clicked "Holy god- If your landlord is a maf-"

"Yes. His dad runs the New York Mafia. He wants to go straight so I'm more than happy to help"

"Your life is insane"

"At least it's not boring."

"I'd argue this is incredibly boring"

"I don't know, I like the quiet routine of it all"

"Had it ever occurred to you Benny that you're boring?"

"I think I'm pretty damn excited"

"Do you? Really? Like honestly Benny?"

"My life is very exciting."

"Sitting in a laundromat for six hours? Watching your underwear go round and round?"

"I don't know," he says "I've heard many lovely ladies complimenting the excitement of washing machines"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm sure many ladies find washing machines exciting." He says

"Do they?"

"I have read."

"Read?

"I have read. Such."

"Ohh in your pervy penthouse magazines?"

"I'm simply saying most girls would like being able to sit on a washing machine for a few hours"

"I doubt that"

"I don't know, I'm sure this would be more exciting if you sat yourself on the washing machine" he smirked

"That's not a real thing Benny"

"I'm sure it does" "Its not"

"You willing to prove that?"

"I'm not sitting on a washing machine to amuse you"

"It's not going to amuse me it's to prove if it's true or not"

"You're disgusting" I sighed getting up and grabbing my bag "I'm going next door for pizza,"

[hillbilly---man]

Pros to sitting in a car dealership for 3+ hours while they fix my car:

Uninterrupted time to play on the internet/do art on my ipad

Not at work and no expectation to do any work today

Their air conditioner is kinda cold which I love (RIP to everyone else freezing their asses off in here though)

They wash my car afterwards for free

Also... My car will be fixed (🤞)

Cons:

They're charging $3 for sodas in the vending machine like I'm at fucking Dollywood or something

[enterdivinity]

uptown girl!

Prologue: Movin’ Out

a/n: have fun reading it! it didn’t take long, and the next chapter will be done around next month(early august) bc i have camp!

cws: ig swearing?

The best part about Chicago was that gorgeous house of yours. The balcony and backyard look on the clear blue water of Lake Michigan and the silver rocks. It was beautiful to say the least, and words could not explain how that view could make a heart flutter at a mile a minute. Sheridan Road wasn’t something to laugh about, it was more something to gawk at. Each neighbor and house around yours was almost the same as your house, since it was such a rich place to live in. Oh North Shore, how perfect it was to live and stay. Except, you wouldn’t be staying here in this huge home anymore. No no, your family was moving to the heart of Tokyo because of your dad getting a promotion and having to move to Japan. This wasn’t something from a fairytale at all, it was a complete nightmare for you.

“Y/N! Bring down the last box from your room,” your mom requested across the hall from your room. Your family wasn’t bad or anything, it was a typical family in the good ol’ US of A! Rolling your eyes, you hauled the last box and lazily dragged it out of your big bedroom and right by the staircase. You didn’t want to move at all, since it would be such a hassle to fly for so many hours and into a new continent. Plus, you didn’t know many basic phrases in Japanese, only knowing stuff like hello, thank you, and some food. And don’t get started on the writing system. Right to left?! Right to fucking left?! Was it some sort of dystopian thingy? Perhaps not, but you had to roll with it. Turning over a new leaf wouldn’t be that bad, since, of course, you’re leaving for another country. Duh!

Putting your phone back in your pocket, you heard the huge moving van for the furniture. You stood up and opened the door for the furniture guys. Each minute and second that passed by made shivers pass down your spine. What if you don’t make friends? What if these people don’t know what a Birkin Bag is? Does this college have enough vending machines? In those pictures on Instagram, it did look like there were nice people there, but no one to her taste. Of course, you would have to test the waters first rather than judging the book by its cover.

When the furniture guys finished packing into the moving van, your palms become sweaty, as your eyebrows furrow. Standing up, you began dragging some of your smaller suitcases into your mom’s Rolls Royce. “Here’s the rest of it, mom,” you grumbled, bitter of course. Well, bitter was quite the understatement. You were frustrated that your family had to leave it all behind for a new place.

You don’t want to have a clever conversation on the reason why you had to leave, but some kind of optimistic advice or message. However, there seem to be none that popped into your head. You would be all alone(of course, with your family) for the first time. New country, new language, like a fish out of a huge pond or an alien from a different plant or universe. Let’s hope you got to fit in like a chameleon, not stuck out like a sore thumb.

As the car stopped at the airport, you opened the back door to walk over and open the trunk. Taking out the able-to-carry luggage, your parents began lightly bickering about which food they should eat at the food court. Apparently, McDonalds was too cheap for your expensive family. “Money screams, wealth whispers,” they said, “you’re too much for some lousy fast food.” It was true, your family was too posh and polite for some kind of greasy fast food. Though, it would be the smallest of problems that became washing over you once the L/N family boarded the plane.

No doubt and no reasons why, your family was in first class. It took about 13 hours for the nonstop flight to land in Tokyo. Seemed like the whole flight was a blur to you, right? It was because you slept the whole time during it. Humorous, right? When the pilot asked for everyone to get off the plane since it was at the gate, you and your family started leaving the plane, getting all your carry ons and all that jazz. Each and every face(other than yours and your family’s faces) looked fuzzy, fully blurred by all that jet lag. This happened to you for about ten seconds, but then you snapped back into reality. Your lips pressed into a thin line as you followed your parents to baggage claim.

Holy shit, genuinely holy shit. How the hell would you get used to this? All those Japanese words above the English words looked like something from a different planet. Plus, as your family finished taking some of the other suitcases out of the baggage claim, everyone looked like businessmen or moms trying to get used to their rowdy children. Haneda Airport wasn’t something to laugh about at all, it looked like something out of a folktale, so futuristic, yet timeless. Who knew what your university would look like after your family got situated in Tokyo? Who knew what people you would meet? Who knew that you would be able to meet the love of your life here?

Like your favorite song Movin’ Out by Billy Joel said, “Mama if that’s movin’ up then I’m movin’ out.” Guess your parents really took that to heart, huh?

[edgessunflower]

Bridge

Pairing: Charlotte Flair x Fem reader

Description: Charlotte stops you from jumping off a bridge after a breakdown

Warning: Mention of self harm and possible suicidal thoughts

The world caved in on you as you stopped seeing the all too familiar bridge above the deep lake staring before driving and pulling your car off to the side of the road near one end of the bridge. You slowly walk and look over the bridge seeing it would be quite a drop down while going back to your car and putting your phone and jewelry in your purse, you climb on the side of the bridge staring down as you slowly raise to stand on your feet staring at the gloomy grey sky filled with clouds and no clear sight of the sky not noticing the car driving on the other end and stopping halfway on the bridge when the person spots you standing on the bridge just as your foot hovered off the bridge until you are suddenly grabbed as a voice breaks through the dark haze you were in that made you a zombie until you turn to see a woman next you. "You don't have to do this...There's always hope" you felt tears form in your eyes while slowly climbing down before breaking down not knowing that she was still next to you until she pulled you into her arms as you sobbed until there was complete silence as you got in your car and followed her to a restaurant where you learn that her name was Charlotte and she was in town wrestling for a show and she was on the way back from a show when she found you on the bridge, there was a strange sense of comfort you felt with charlotte opening up to her about your addiction to sleeping pills to numb the pain of your depression and anxiety as well as the loss of your best friend who was the one thing in your life that brought you joy and the only real person who loved you since you didn't have a family. After talking and eating for an hour she handed you a ticket to the NXT show the next day which put the biggest smile on your face that you hadn't had in two full years, you sat behind the barricade in awe like a little kid watching the show as each match became better and better unable to control your smile seeing charlotte on the apron as the two of you lock eyes not expecting her to blow a kiss at you right before her match quickly catching the kiss which she saw out of the corner of her eye feeling her heart flutter hearing your laughter and yells throughout the match with Bayley unable to control her smile hearing your squeals when she won asking security to have you backstage as she showered and changed smiling when you walk in her locker room. The two of you enjoy the rest of the night together with a few drinks of champagne and bowl of fruits in her hotel room after agreeing to spend the night with her at her hotel room and to her proposed date the next day looking at yourself in the mirror as you washed your face and changed into charlotte's extra pair of pajamas, the smile on your face never went away as you sit on the bed watching tv giggling when charlotte comes back with candy from the vending machine eating M&M's like little kids with a movie playing for the next hour before laying down and going to sleep feeling the complete change to your life over the past day and a new sense of purpose and care by having charlotte in your life.

[magic-vending-machine]

inserts a car wash token

Soapy water leaks out from under the vending machine as it whirs for a very long time.

[crownoflillies1]

For Your Pleasure - Part 2: Hidden

Pairing: unnamed male/female

Word Count: 2.3k

Summary: A stop on a road trip takes a turn.

Tags: 18+, semi-public sex, light dom, praise, car sex

Why did this state have so many potholes? One could hardly go half a mile without bouncing through six of them. Some were so deep her heart clenched with worry the tire might pop. Her lips mushed into a tight line as they bounced through another one. Under her tight pencil skirt her thighs slid together, shimmying her hips back and forth in the seat. She had to go so bad.

“How much longer?” She tilted her head to glance at him, relaxed in the driver seat.

He didn’t answer right away, pondering how long ago he saw the sign. “I’m not really sure, darling. Maybe 5 minutes? It did say it was 10 miles.”

A strained groan fell from her lips. She cursed herself within her head for not accepting the last rest stop they passed. Just a few minutes longer then she can run into the bathroom. Until then, she resigned herself to rubbing her thighs together.

The rest stop exit crept up on them faster than she expected and a silent thank you went up to whoever watched over this earth. He gently pulled the suv into a space on the side of the building. A small enclosed snack bar full of vending machines butted against the restroom building, hiding them from both other vehicles and the highway. Before he had the car fully in park she was out and running inside.

A small smirk pulled at his lips as she walked back to the suv. While she tended to herself he exited the vehicle and leaned against it, bathing him in the red light of the setting sun. The smirk along with his leaning against the vehicle developed a warm spot in her stomach, spreading deliciously down.

When she came within arms reach he reached out and wrapped them around her waist, pulling her close to his body. He pressed gentle kisses to her cheeks before planting one on her lips.

“You have no idea how good you look in the sunlight.” He said, voice low. Hands roamed down her body cupping the supple flesh of her butt. He hummed low in his throat. “And in a skirt, especially a tight one like this. Why wear a such a tight skirt for a road trip?”

A blaze of heat filled her cheeks. Oh, she knew she was redder than the sunset. “It’s new, I just wanted the excuse to wear it. I couldn’t wait until we went to a nice dinner during our vacation to wear it.”

“Is that right?” Fingers continued to massage her buttocks, riding the tight skirt higher on her frame. Goosebumps washed over her thighs and butt when the skirt rose high enough for a breeze of air to hit her bare cheeks.

“Babe!” She hissed, a grin stretching her lips. A battle over her skirt ensued, him winning. She giggled. Another kiss placated her into allowing him to lead her to the back of the suv. One hand released her and pushed the button for the automatic hatch to open.

“Sit.” He commanded.

“Why-“

“Sit. Your. Ass. Down.” The red sunlight covered his face, adding another layer to his fiery look. She sat. “Good girl.” He snickered. He leaned forward to press his hand to the top of the suv frame and balance his weight. Her own weight rested on her hands splayed behind her.

Warm fingers trailed up the inside of her leg, to her thigh, and finally under her skirt. She gazed down, peering at the outline of his hand in her skirt. Her hips rutted up when he ghosted across her thong covered clit. A smirk formed again on his face.

The thong fabric was thin, perfect for hiding panty lines when wearing the skirt, but also to feel each movement he made. First he brushed his knuckles up and down, up then down. Right where her clit sat, nestled under her thong and between her folds . Her lungs filled with air and released it with a quiet moan.

“You like that?” A nod was all she could muster. His fingers stopped their rubbing. She pouted silently. His middle finger hooked onto her thong and pulled it to the side. The same finger dipped down, parting her folds and sliding into her growing slick. The tip of his finger prodded at her entrance, circling it, coating his finger in her wetness. Once satisfied, he dragged it up in between her folds and encased her clit with his finger, slathering it to move unhindered between his fingers.

Rapid breaths filled the space between them. Small moans and whimpers fell from her parted lips. The sun created a blaze of light which blinded her so she closed her eyelids. She could hear his own breaths increasing while his fingers rolled her clit. Each little tug he made sent delicious waves of heat up her stomach, building into that tight coil of ecstasy.

“Such a pretty girl.” He praised. Oh how that added to that coil! A whine of displeasure rolled in her throat when he pulled away. “Lay back, lift your hips.”

Her self dignity went out the window. She laid back against the floor. It was large enough to give ample room for her to maneuver herself down, and her hips up. His hands pushed at the skirt until it gave way and gathered bunched up at the widest part of her hips. She shivered at the touch of the cool breeze on her exposed body.

He shuffled downward and kneeled on the ground with one knee. Her hips rested on his forearms which snaked under them to keep them lifted. His head lowered just above her clit. Slowly his eyes blinked and he looked up at her. A smile spread wide on his lips.

A sharp inhale of breath broke the tension. The flat surface of his tongue swiped hard on her clit, licking up. He then flicked it with the tip of his tongue. Mercilessly he rolled it around slathering it with spit. He closed his lips around it sucking softly.

“Oh, yes, fuck,” she moaned. The soft back of the floor tousled her hair when she laid back fully. While his lips stayed closed around her clit, his tongue continued to assault it in flicks and rolls. His fingers rubbed circles on her skin above her skirt. With a loud pop he broke free of her. Before she could miss his touch he flattened his tongue against it again. He licked at it like a cat drinking milk.

“God darling, I can’t get enough of you. Look how wet you’re getting. You got dribbles all over the place, and your pretty little clit. Fuck baby I could bite it.” His voice dropped low, mumbling against her as he kissed her wet folds. One arm unwrapped her thigh. He stretched his arm and told hold of her breast.

“You can,” a pathetic whimper escaped her.

“Oh can I? Want me to bite your clit then suck the pain away?”

“Yes,” she whimpered. A pleasure jolt of pain raced through her body. His teeth bit gently into the flesh before releasing it and sucking the pain away into ecstasy. Three times he bit and sucked before he returned his tongue to rolling around it. Each bite added one more tighten to the coil deep in her stomach.

He released her breast only to bring that hand to her slick cunt. A finger slid into her. Only to the first knuckle. The intrusion was enough to tighten that coil almost all the way before breaking.

“Oh don’t stop, suck, suck it. I’m gonna cum. Please I’m so close.” Her hands found his hair and gripped handfuls of it hard. The pace of his sucks increased. His tongue drove harder circles and the tip of his finger massaged the area it occupied.

The coil exploded. White hot pleasure rippled through her body. His hips thrust up in his mouth, gyrating against his tongue and lips desperate to elongate her orgasm. She twitched while coming down from her high. Her hands pulled at his hair trying to tear him off her clit. His licks were too much now and overstimulated her. Thankfully he obeyed.

“Roll over, on your knees, ass up.”

“But someone-,”

“Now baby girl. No one can see us. Even if they could I wouldn’t care. I’m gonna fuck you until you see stars baby girl. On. Your. Knees.”

She knew he was right and rolled over. Her chest pressed into the floor of suv and she arched her ass up. Her eyes closed listening to him undo his pants and shimmy them down his thighs. She jumped when his hand smacked her ass and then the other cheek. He leaned over her, lips close to her ear, his hard cock pressed against her ass.

“You’re such a good girl for me. You want this?”

She nodded.

“Use your words.”

“I want you. Please.”

She didn’t need to say it twice. He leaned back and plunged his cock to the hilt into her. Her slick and cum mixture enough for him to glide in effortlessly. A quiet groan fell from his lips.

“Even after I made you cum on my tongue you’re still so tight. I can’t get enough of your pussy.” He drew back slowly having her feel each inch slide back out before slamming forward again. Over and over he kept this snails pace. Her body ached for more.

“Faster.”

“What was that?” He stilled in her, buried again to the hilt.

“Faster. Fuck me. Please fuck me.” She could hear the smirk on his lips.

“Of course baby girl,” a snap of his hips sent his cock drilling in and out of her. Sounds of wet slaps echoed in the suv. She moaned loud. The delicious sting of him bottoming out washed over her with each thrust.

His hand reached forward and wrapped around her neck. He pulled it back, lifting her head off the floor. Small gasps fell from her each time he thrust forward, pushing her throat into his hand. His other had reached down and yanked at the thong. He twisted his fingers in the thin fabric using it as a handle to pull her hips back into him.

The coil began to tighten again in her stomach. The pull of her thong forced the edge of it to rub against her clit. It sawed back and forth with the rocking motion.

“Such a pretty girl. Such a pretty pussy. Fuck darling you’re addictive.” His words didn’t help the ball and instead tightened it harder. Much to her dismay his thrusts slowed to a halt. He released her neck. Her head dropped back down. With his cock still in her, he repositioned so one knee rested on the step plate of the suv.

The new position allowed his cock to drive deeper. She moaned at the feeling of his tip pressed so hard in her. He spurred her on by making shallow thrusts, rutting his tip back and forth in that deep spot. The now free hand kept busy by smacking her ass until it glowed as red as the setting sun. Impatience took hold of him and soon his hips moved again hammering away. While keeping a hold on her thong he leaned down and over her back.

His panting brushed against her ear. Hot and heavy puffs made some strands of hair sway against her neck. In any other circumstance it would’ve tickled.

Desperate to build that coil deep in her, she rocked her hips back and forth in time with his thrusts. Doing so kept the taut fabric sawing against her clit.

A deep rumble way off in the distance brought her head down out of the clouds a bit. It grew closer and she could hear the semi pulling into a truck spot on the other side of the wall they were fucking behind.

“Isn’t the thrill of getting caught part of the fun?” His voice pulled her back into the heat of their rut. She agreed, the thought of it broke the coil prematurely in her stomach. Even faster she rocked her hips forcing a higher orgasm out of her.

“Fuck!” He growled. She knew she clenched down hard during her orgasm causing a tighter hold on him. He didn’t even need to tell her he was cumming. A few more completely erratic thrusts and he stilled. His hips pressed hard into her ass cheeks. His balls slapped one more time before resting against her slit. Oh how she loved feeling his balls on her. His cock pulsed four times inside her signaling his cum emptied in her.

Still panting he pressed a kiss to her neck right below her ear. With a grunt he slid out and let go of her thong. She looked behind her and his cock glistened in the last shreds of sun and the newly light street lights, coated in her slick and both their cum. She stayed in the same spot watching him pull up his pants. A yelp in shock split the silence when he slapped her bare and red ass cheek.

“We should get going, we have two more hours ahead of us.”

Her thong was sticky and wet so she pulled it off and dropped it on the floor. The tight skirt still bunched up made it easy to hop off the back. He shut the hatch door while she pulled her skirt back into place. Once seated in the car he backed them out and put them back on the highway.

“What’s wrong?” He asked when she sighed.

“I’m getting cum all over my skirt.” She puffed, feeling it slid out of her and drop on the inside of her skirt.

“Good thing the hotel has a laundry room.” She smiled. Yes, it was a good thing. Even if it didn’t, she wouldn’t have changed a thing.

[oceansprompts]

RANDOM ACTS OF SERVICE SYMBOL PROMPTS

ₓ ˚ .   ୭   ˚ ○ ◦ ˚     inspired from these few lists. as always, some triggering content may be present! change any pronouns to better suit your muse(s) needs!     ˚ ◦ ○ ˚   ୧   . ˚ ₓ

+   ADD “REVERSE” FOR THE  ( RECEIVER )  TO PERFORM THE ACTION TO/FOR THE  ( SENDER )

📄 : ( SENDER ) pays a bill before ( RECEIVER ) gets to it.

🍳 : ( SENDER ) makes breakfast for ( RECEIVER )

🧺 : ( SENDER ) washes + puts away ( RECEIVER ) clothes.

🧁 : ( SENDER ) makes ( RECEIVER ) favourite treat.

👔 : ( SENDER ) irons ( RECEIVER ) work clothes for them.

🔑 : ( SENDER ) helps with some of ( RECEIVER ) chores.

🍏 : ( SENDER ) packs ( RECEIVER ) lunch for the day.

☕ : ( SENDER ) makes coffee for ( RECEIVER )

🚘 : ( SENDER ) washes ( RECEIVER ) car.

📞 : ( SENDER ) schedule ( RECEIVER ) appointment for them.

⛽ : ( SENDER ) fills ( RECEIVER ) car with gas.

🤍 : ( SENDER ) forgives ( RECEIVER ) for something they’ve done.

🖤 : ( SENDER ) apologizes to ( RECEIVER ) for something they’ve done.

🙏 : ( SENDER ) lets ( RECEIVER ) know they’re appreciated.

💡 : ( SENDER ) encourages ( RECEIVER ) on an anxious matter.

🎁 : ( SENDER ) buys a surprise gift for ( RECEIVER )

📚 : ( SENDER ) teaches ( RECEIVER ) something.

🔨 : ( SENDER ) helps ( RECEIVER ) with a household project.

📍 : ( SENDER ) drives ( RECEIVER ) to their desired location.

🍽 : ( SENDER ) does the dishes for ( RECEIVER )

🛏 : ( SENDER ) makes the bed for ( RECEIVER )

🧦 : ( SENDER ) puts on ( RECEIVER ) socks.

👠 : ( SENDER ) puts on ( RECEIVER ) shoes for them.

🦶 : ( SENDER ) takes off ( RECEIVER ) shoes for them.

🥡 : ( SENDER ) picks up ( RECEIVER ) food + delivers it to them.

🍝 : ( SENDER ) cooks ( RECEIVER ) favourite meal.

🌿 : ( SENDER ) mows the lawn for ( RECEIVER )

👜 : ( SENDER ) organizes ( RECEIVER ) drawers or closet.

🛁 : ( SENDER ) bathes ( RECEIVER )

💤 : ( SENDER ) lets ( RECEIVER ) sleep in.

🎶 : ( SENDER ) shares a music playlist made for ( RECEIVER )

🎧 : ( SENDER ) shares a podcast playlist made for ( RECEIVER )

✅ : ( SENDER ) fulfils a favour ( RECEIVER ) asked of them.

🔥 : ( SENDER ) gives ( RECEIVER ) a warm towel after their shower.

🛒 : ( SENDER ) returns with groceries for ( RECEIVER )

🪚 : ( SENDER ) completes a task ( RECEIVER ) planned to do.

🌹 : ( SENDER ) surprises ( RECEIVER ) with a date/outing.

🥐 : ( SENDER ) brings ( RECEIVER ) breakfast in bed.

🧹 : ( SENDER ) cleans up a room in ( RECEIVER ) house for them.

🩰 : ( SENDER ) goes to + watches an event ( RECEIVER ) participates in.

🗑 : ( SENDER ) takes ( RECEIVER ) trash out.

🚙 : ( SENDER ) picks ( RECEIVER ) up from an appointment.

👟 : ( SENDER ) cleans up ( RECEIVER ) shoes to look new again.

🧼 : ( SENDER ) does ( RECEIVER ) laundry for them.

🔎 : ( SENDER ) finds something ( RECEIVER ) has been looking for.

🤲 : ( SENDER ) helps ( RECEIVER ) do something for someone else.

🕶 : ( SENDER ) starts ( RECEIVER ) car so it’s warm/cool for them.

📢 : ( SENDER ) compliments ( RECEIVER ) on an insecurity if theirs.

💺 : ( SENDER ) gives ( RECEIVER ) their seat on a crowded bus/subway.

🛍 : ( SENDER ) helps ( RECEIVER ) carry their groceries in.

🧭 : ( SENDER ) assists ( RECEIVER ) when they’re lost.

📱 : ( SENDER ) calls ( RECEIVER ) to check up on them.

💵 : ( SENDER ) gives ( RECEIVER ) change for a vending machine.

🧃 : ( SENDER ) brings a cold drink to ( RECEIVER ) on a hot day

🍵 : ( SENDER ) brings a warm drink to ( RECEIVER ) on a cold day.

📸 : ( SENDER ) offers to take a nice photo of ( RECEIVER )

📖 : ( SENDER ) reads to ( RECEIVER )

🔧 : ( SENDER ) changes ( RECEIVER ) flat tire for them.

🌚 : ( SENDER ) offers ( RECEIVER ) to watch the sunset.

🌞 : ( SENDER ) offers ( RECEIVER ) to watch the sunrise.

👄 : ( SENDER ) listens as ( RECEIVER ) talks about their day.

🧴 : ( SENDER ) rubs ( RECEIVER ) tense shoulders.

🌲 : ( SENDER ) joins ( RECEIVER ) on a nature walk or hike.

🏋 : ( SENDER ) joins ( RECEIVER ) at the gym.

🗓 : ( SENDER ) accompanies ( RECEIVER ) to an appointment of theirs.

👍 : ( SENDER ) tells ( RECEIVER ) they are doing a good job.

❓ : ( SENDER ) asks ( RECEIVER ) “what can i help you with?”

[frogmanfae]

Newsies as Shit I've Heard This Week 5

Another a long one🙃

Medda: Hows it going?

Davey: Not terrible

Medda: Ah... well we aren't aiming for terrible so I guess we're on the right track

Elmer: Do you have memories by Taylor Swift?

Jojo: Do you like Jesus?

Crutchie: What are you wearing tomorrow?

Race: Probably that random guys sweat shirt

Crutchie: Which random guy

Race: The one from freshman year

Crutchie: From the football game?

Race: No the basketball game

Crutchie: Ohh the blonde freshman basketball guy

Race: No the one who had purple highlights

Crutchie: Oh! Okay that guy

Race: Yeah

Spot: Why the fuck did you pull so many guys as a freshman?

Race: You say it like I don't still pull

Jack, either about Medda or his partner: She spewed words at me over the phone but I was mad and I wasn't listening so I have no clue what she was trying to tell me

Race: I was hot. Right? Spot?

Spot, either not listening or avoiding his feelings: That car was going way too fast

Jojo: Is that your stuff??

Elmer: No?

Jojo: Who's stuff is on your chair??? Ugh! Excuse her! What is this

Race, after getting a concussion: This Barbie has brain damage

Race: Okay I woke up and I felt like shit, lately I've always felt like shit when I wake up but it was extra bad today so I just started crying

Davey, who's learned sometimes Race just needs to talk and not be consoled: It be like that sometimes

Race: So I was trying to do my eyeliner but I was crying and that- well that doesn't go too well

Davey: Right because your eye liner isn't waterproof

Race: I really need to invest in waterproof liner but the guy I'm seeing thinks it's hot when my makeup gets fucked up when I suck hi-

Davey: that took a turn a little too far for your volume to still be this loud

Crutchie: are you ready for Mandatory Corn Hole?

Jack: MANDATORY CORN HOLE!!!

Buttons: Have you found the post where she talks about eggs growing on trees?

Jojo: What's being in the school musical like?

Elmer: Uh so do you know Stockholm Syndrome? It's like that

Jack: It's that time the moment you've all been waiting for: me to stop talking

Graves: Hey if you're gonna die just lemme know *gestures to shirt advertising a cemetery he works at*

York: You can get me in there?

Graves: I can dig your grave for you

York: That almost sounds like a threat but I know you

Jack: He's such a little dictator !!!

Medda: I didn't know what you were going to say-

Jack: He's such a dick /tator/

Jojo: Is the test tomorrow going to take all period?

Medda: The way this review is going? Probably

Davey, who recently began to gage his ears and has noticed an accompanying smell: I was trying to read an article-

Race: Was it about how your ears smell like cheese?

Crutchie: ... What

Romeo: I saw you holding out your hands like you were showing the size of something

Race: Oh yeah someone's dick

Romeo: :0

Romeo: I'm gonna go back to reading my gay webtoon now

Oscar: *in the background* I shaved my pubes earlier

Davey: 😟

Crutchie: Did you hear that too??

Davey: I heard it

Crutchie: Who the fuck just says??

Davey: out loud??

Race: *holds out an entire handful of quarters* I put a 10 in the vending machine because I got thirsty

Albert, cishet: shut up

Race, gay and afab nonbinary: Are you???

Albert: Yes.

Race: You just???

Albert: Yes.

Race: You hate gay people!

Albert: Yes!

Race: You hate women!

Albert: Yes!

Race: You just called me a tranny!!!

Albert: Yea!!

Race: :0

(They're best friends)

Davey: I tried washing it off but my hand is still sticky

Race: That's what she said

Davey: :0 you're the reason why non binary peo aren't recognized by the LGBT community

Race: :00

Race, to Albert: DID YOU HEAR THAT

Albert: No. He got away with it. I didn't hear a thing.

Romeo, in an official award acceptance speech: I would like to thank my peers for voting for me to receive this honor, my dad for always supporting me, peanut butter for its buttery goodness, and my friends for always having my back

Elmer, to Buttons in the audience: did he just-

Buttons: thank peanut butter for its buttery goodness? Yeah. Yeah he did.

Elmer: isn't he-

Buttons: yeah he's allergic to peanuts.

Race: Whenever I hear "terrible towel" from the sports ball people I think "cum rag"

Spot: you think WHAT

Sarah: I love sexism I have sexism every night

Race, looking in his phone camera: I am so hot omg

Jack: I'm actually kinda col- oh. I thought you were talking about temperature

Graves: Why's he got his shirt unbuttoned like he's prince Sebastian

Romeo: PRINCE SEBASTIAN??

Graves: from the little mermaid??

Romeo, dying: THATS PRINCE ERIC

Romeo: SEBASTIAN IS THE CRAB

Graves:...

TW SUICIDE JOKE AND F SLUR AS A JOKE

Sarah: Don't worry I would never trade you for money. Only Bitcoin

Davey: Kill yourself. Die

Sarah: You first!

Davey: Kill yourself!

Sarah: You first!

Sarah: Faggot!

Davey: You're a faggot first!

Sarah: Faggot! You like men!

Davey: You like women first!

Sarah: At least they're better!

Davey: Ah- yeah...

Elmer, walking into Brooklyn for the first time: Oh my god! WEAR YOUR CLOTHES!!!

Denton, an english teacher who's never met Jack: Did you know that the West symbolizes death and endings?

Jack: What.

Davey: Legend has it- or SCIENCE has it-

Albert: Shut the fuck up

Race: Sit on my lap

Medda: I would crush you

Race: I've gotten crushed in football I'm used to it

Medda: Not this much buddy

Buttons: It's like when your dog runs away. That's how I feel without Splasher... Fido come home...

Race: It was dark and windy and there were no lights on and suddenly there was a machette

Davey: I was gone for 2 seconds what did I walk into

Specs: This freaks me out. I can't deal with things touching my eye. It's why I don't wear contact lenses. Cuz I'm a big baby

Davey: You get rid of noro virus by... *vague hand gestures* both ends... As people say... And that doesn't mean you play both quarterback and line backer it's... It's not good

Splasher: Will that thing we did last year work again?

Medda: No, I don't think so... It's cool but it's not that cool

(You don't understand how funny this was, it was our (very conservative) biology teacher talking about baiting his freshmen to bring back "phat with a ph" for bonus points)

Davey: I could light myself on fire and I don't think they'd even notice. At some point I think someone would go "...*sniff* *sniff* ugh I don't think lunch is gonna be good today" and they would have no idea that I burned to death

Davey, teacher: *drawing examples on the board* how about that? I'm hard pressed to make anything else because I can't draw but you get the point

Denton: It's like you're stabbing Ms. Medda in the eye

Crutchie: What.

Denton: Like a jump scare like- TRUTH

Crutchie: What compels you to say that? You could have said anything else

Denton: Because that's what it feels like!

Albert: We have a pep assembly on a Tuesday? What has the world come to?

Romeo: Do you want some gmo rats? They count as fruit

Jack: Maybe I'll just wallow in depression and everyone who's here can observe like I'm a zoo animal

Davey: I think that's less likely than biological warfare- which is real. Biological warfare is REAL

Jack: Dave, I love you, but what the fuck does that have anything to do with me asking if it's pizza day?

Davey: sorry I'm in a mood and all I can think about is bio-

Jack: biological warfare? Yeah I noticed

Jack: Some of my answers are like a politician. Like... "He talked a lot but... he didn't really say anything... Like that really wasn't an answer that... I was looking for"

Davey: They're serial killers!

Jack: But the good kind?

Davey: *overjoyed* BUT THE GOOD KIND!! A VIGILANTE!!!

Race: It's science but Master Chef

Davey, tutoring a large group: When these cells mature, they no longer laugh at potty jokes. Until then they're insufferable to be around...

Literally everyone: *silence*

Davey: You guys can laugh that was funny

Everyone: *nothing*

Davey: A... Science joke...

Albert: *exaggerated* Ha ha

Davey: I appreciate that, thank you Albert

Finch: Ah!! A freshman left his water bottle here!! *drags trash bin across the floor and knocks water bottle into it with a meter stick* gross. Infectious. That's how you take care of that

Denton: The original Trojan horse

Race: *gasps* transgender!

Race: Spray tan or tanning bed?

Spot: ...What?

Race: Spray tan or tanning bed?

Spot: ...Neither? Go outside?

Albert: *Sarcastic* yeah go phospholipids

Davey: *excited* yeah! Phospholipids!! That's what's up!