#Can you believe that she’s turning 6? lol
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MATILDA
Aaron Hotchner
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cw; childhood trauma, panic attacks, illusions to drinking, abuse, self-worth issues, mentions of the bau's traumas, hurt, blood, violence, bit of a persistent and overbearing hotch at the end. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF ANY MENTION OF THESE THINGS TRIGGER YOU. This is a very deep and raw piece.
this has not been edited because it feels a bit too personal to reread lol
you have been warned.
You were always conditioned to brush off your feelings. It became a coping mechanism to get through the torment of your past. Physically you were fine but emotionally you were bruised and tainted with the colour indigo, that led to the bottled up pain.
No one knew your history or the treatment you went throuh as a child, in fact you often believed you history inferior due to your friends' upbringings. With Morgan being manipulated and molested, Emiy being dragged city to city to escape bible bashings, JJ losing a most beoved sister, Penelope losing her parents, Spencer's father leaving and him becoming a prodigy of the education system, Rossi watching his friends die right in front of him and Hotch. Well, Hotch's past had been a blurred line to the team, similar to yours. Though they knew something had happened to destroy you mentally for you to be where you were today- it was practically alien to have a member of the bau come from a happy home.
Your team had lost people around them, family, friends- life's true tragedy. But, you didn't. You lost no one but yourself.
You could argue that you lost you parents but it would be insensitive, they were still alive but they simply were never parents to you. They were strangers who barely even knew of your existence when you were present and a burden now that you were no longer around for them. No longer there to be their punching bag, no longer there to be their outlet of anger and cutthroat insults.
When the topic comes up, you deny, deny, deny.
"It's no big deal really," you would tell them with a large smile, diverting their attention and you had given them no reason to doubt you until one case.
A case that focused on parents abusing their children. You had almost gone quiet but it was not noticed, you played it off as exhaustion considering you had all been working back to back for weeks straight.
The jet felt colder that Tuesday morning, the seats glassed with a coat of ice as you sat down, letting out a shiver, Hotch takes his usual seat besides you and raises an eyebrow at you. "You okay?"
You nod with a smile, "Yeah it's no big deal, just a bit cold." You shrug, looking out the window, ready to set off for New Orleans. Midway through the flight, you feel a material rest over your legs, seeing Hotch reading the case file and hardly even looking at you. `like he could sense your need for some sort of comfort, whether it be from the sudden breeze or the pain inside your heart.
You arrive swiftly at the precinct, everyone getting up and getting to work. The team rarely struggled on a case but as you were all slumped around a board finishing your takeout. You look over the case files again and look up, causing eyes to dart over to you.
"Oh she's on-to something." Morgan exclaims.
"Let it download, almost there." Emily smirks slightly, watching the cogs turn in their head.
"A child can form a negative sense of love from super young, right?"
"Yeah, it's called our 'love map', it's the ideology of our internal software being developed from around the ages 5 to 6 based on our surroundings and the environment we grew up in." Spencer adds and agrees, seeing where you are going with this.
"And am i right in saying that it is effects our ability to process, receive and distribute love?" You inquire and Spencer nods along.
"Yeah, the result of a healthy development of self-cohesion, self-constancy, and self-agency is self-esteem. Positive affect becomes integrated with self-representation. A negative love map, essentially a distorted internal representation of what a healthy relationship looks like based on negative past experiences, can lead to significant issues in romantic relationships, including difficulty forming deep connections, distrust, emotional withdrawal, anxiety, and a tendency to repeat unhealthy patterns." Spencer nods along.
"So, this unsub had a broken home? Let's get Garcia to check records of social service calls to residents with multiple visits." Emily says to the team as they dial Garcia and are met with a sigh at the vast load she has to sieve through.
"I wouldn't rely on it there are so many left unreported." You added, shaking your head. "Look for school reports, teachers may have noticed suspicious behaviour and markings on a child- it's not much and hardly narrows it down but it is something."
The team nod impressed and you catch Hotch's eye as he narrows his eyes softly, like he was trying to read into your soul. You were, simply put, a book he could read one hundred times and still be unable to decode every last detail.
"Garcia, cross check school reports with silent 911 calls." You heart ached as you say the words, a rush of memories flooding back to you as you ran up the stairs of your house, hearing your father shouting up at you and your mother knocking on your door harshly. You'll never forget those knocks, like a constant reminder that you were always wrong. You had stolen the landline phone, really scared for your life in that moment. You were sat in you closet, knees tucked to your chest as silent tears glass your eyes.
"911, what's your emergency?"
Silence.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
"Hello?"
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
"This is 911, are you in danger?"
Yes, help. Please. I'm scared.
Your shallow breaths cut through the silence before the call ended and your inevitable fate had drawn closer.
"I've cross checked teachers note with 911 calls and i think i have something." Garcia informs the team over the phone, "It may be a long shot but a man named Dane Kirighan called 911 twice but they were both silent, as our pretty girl said." She starts. "His mom Janet Kirighan recently passsed away... it says... oh- she was bludgened to death by a flat object four months ago.."
"That could be our stressor." Aaron nods at the team as Garcia continues.
"It gets worse, his father was sentenced to life for the murder of Janet Kirighan but he was deemed deceased only last month."
You stay silent. "He has abandonment issues, as much as he hated them both for the pain they inflicted, they left him again..."
"What's his address?"
The case was long, almost a week long and you were sure it was torturous. Memories came back in floods to the point that you could no longer focus on the situation at hand but rather the pain in Dane Kirighan's voice as he screamed in the line of crossfire.
One harsh scream then silence.
That silence you knew all too well, you left the scene quickly, getting into the back of one of the SUV's. You talk to no one, you look at no one, you react to nothing. Right now, you're as lifeless as Dane. The little boy who was manipulated and formed into a killer. You shouldn't but you empathise for him. You sympathise.
You knew that there were two sides to a coin and you and Dane Kirighan were one of the same. Heads vs Tales, you saw different lives but deep down you were made from the same foundations and ou were terrified.
You excused yourself from the car, heading into the bathroom to freshen up. No one joined you, which you were grateful for because currently, you hamd was stretched against the painted wall, clawing for something to hold you body up as your other dug into the skin of your chest as if it would help you breathe. Suddenly you were back in that closet, rocking back and fourth as you hear footsteps growing nearer to you.
You heart rate picked up at the memory, you breathing becoming shallow and uneven and suddenly the all too familiar burning sensation infiltrated your lungs. The need of oxygen grew stronger as you slid down the wall of the bathroom, feeling pathetic and completely naked on that tile flooring.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
Your mind became your biggest enemy as your heartbeat rung through you ears like a cry for help.
Footsteps.
The echo of your parent's footsteps grew louder in you mind as they neared the bathroom door.
Your heart was racing. Fuck. Breathing. You need to breathe. Come on. You gotta keep trying. In and Out. They're not here. You're safe.
Until silence, once again.
A laugh echoed from outside and you realised you were safe, you were home. Not all family was bad, but you didn't know how to be in the family. What was your role?
You walk back to the team after freshing up a bit, swearing an oath to yourself to avoid the topic of your panic attack.
You walk up to the team and they greet you with warm smiles.
"Nice call kid, you may not feel like it was positive but you helped." Rossi pulled you into a hug, a tight hug and you realised that the team knew. Fuck, they knew.
"How did you know?" Emiy inquires, breaking the ice to the topic. "How did you know to check for 911 calls?"
"I did it a few times," you shrug, being honest. This is what a family des right. "I knew nothing would come out of it but it felt like I was doing something."
Faces softened and you hated that.
You pull you hair into a ponytail and smile, though it is far from real. "it's no big deal."
"You were abused." Hotch's voice cuts the silence and zones his vision on you. "Do you hear me?"
"Hotch man-" Derek tries to intervene but Hotch cuts him off.
"You were abused." he repeats.
"Stop."
"You are a victim." he states so boldly with no judgement whatsoever.
"Stop," You repeat, urgently, feeling your emotions swell.
"It is a big deal. You. Were. Abused." He repeats and you are getting angry now, you hardly notice that Hotch had gestured for the others to leave.
"Hotch- stop it."
"Why are you defending them?"
"I'm not."
"The people you should trust the most hurt you, in every way they could."
"Hotch-" you feel tears threaten your eyes.
"That's why you don't trust easy. It's why you don't talk about your experiences. It's why you never miss a deadline because you think you will be punished. You think that your a burden and you bottle up your feelings and belittle them until they are overwhelming for you. Its why you can tell who is nearing you because you have our footsteps memorised. Do you know what these are?"
"Stop profiling me." You burst, your voice echoing through the walls.
A tear.
He lifts his hand.
You flinch.
He moves gently.
You look down.
He tilts your head up.
"It's all trauma responses. You are a victim of abuse and you're too thoughtful to ask for help because you don't want to gain friendships where people will leave you."
Your eyes are full of silent tears as you look up at him.
His heart breaks.
"You can let it go." He whispers to you, resting his hand on your cheek. "Do you hear me?"
You nod, you eyes rimmed red and glossy with pain.
"You-" he points at your chest, more specifically your heart. "You don't have to invite your blood related family to the party of your soul."
"Your heart, honey, truly is a party. It is beautiful, it is flourished, it is fun and it reflects every ounce of who you are. Your parents never showed you love but I do, we all do. Never be sorry for growing up surrounded by pain, never belittle your past experiences until you are on the edge okay?"
"What are you asking of me?"
"I'm asking you to let me love you... let me take care of you. You talk of all this pain like it's alright, it isn't so stop. A part of you feels like a lost cause but baby, you shine like the brightest star. You showed me a power that is strong enough to bring sun to the darkest days."
"I'm asking you to let me into your heart, your mind."
In that moment, you realised that you were starting a family who will always show you love and though it will be a long process, it will be worth it in the end.
#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#hotch x you#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#agent hotchner#hotch#hotchner x reader#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotchner x you#hurt/comfort#aaron hotchner imagine#hotch x reader
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✨🎂✨
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASENATH!
022924
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#dislyte#シンネオ#dislyte fanart#dislyte asenath#dislyte laura#dislyte odette#Can you believe that she’s turning 6? lol#I had a friend in hs whose birthday was the 29th and she enjoyed celebrating her birthday whenever she wanted it to be that year lol#happy 5th birthday to you too girl! lol#botanical garden date
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Good conflict through miscommunication/lack of communication: character traits and insecurities keeping characters from speaking plainly because of any number of fears (like a legitimate reason to not trust someone fully) or a disagreement of opinion on the right course of action or mishearing someone/not being able to express oneself because the person isn't used to doing so for whatever reason/ expects things to get worse through communication from previous bad experiences. All of those are great, don't get why people want all characters to talk fully rationally and all-cards-on-the-table to avoid conflict.
Bad and frustrating conflict through lack of communication: whatever the 100 times rehashed "deep emotional" conversations on supernatural were. how did they talk about the same shit in almost the same words over and over without having it affect their decision making and characterisation ever?
Yeah, like conflict through bad communication can be done well, I just find it very often isn't done well, which leads to it being just really frustrating. Chloe's reaction to Lucifer being, well, Lucifer will never not piss me off; literally from the first episode he outright admits to being the Devil, she sees him do obviously non-human things almost every single episode, but then is so shocked and appalled by his Devil Face that she has a breakdown and fucks off for like 6 months!
I can only calm myself by telling myself that she fucks off for 6 months because she's just deeply humiliated that she refused to believe him and needed 6 months to regrow an ego after acting like a dumbass for what is implied to be multiple years of working with this guy.
#you gave me space to complain about this more lol#she also comes back just fully radicalised into believing she needs to literally murder him to protect the world?#and it's like?????#You worked with him for how long???#he's never lied about who he is you're just very dumb#you're in love with him as far as you're aware#but after 6 months some random fucking priest has fully radicalised you????#I don't know man it just doesn't make sense to me#like if my boyfriend/partner who been telling me since we met that he's the devil turned out to actually be the devil#*my* response would probably be 'oh yeah that checks out explains all the weird ass shit that happens around you'#explains why you can *literally hypnotise people into admitting their deepest desires*!#I hate how Chloe is written *so* much#sorry this just turned into me bitching about Lucifer lol
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do you have a post for wlw shows in specific? i dont mind just going through your main masterlist if not
as well, do you have any wlw shows w transfem leads? that one might be asking for too much, lol.
i don't have an asian wlw list yet, but i will make one here for you bun! i will only be including shows that pass my personal minimum standard for dramas. all shows are sorted in a recommended watching order
WLW
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1. She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat neighbours; self-discovery; food; comfort watch
Nomoto loves to cook, but tends to make too much food and has no one to share it with. Luckily for her, turns out her neighbor Kasuga has a big enough appetite for the both of them.
No international streaming available, translated to english by Furritsubs, S1 & S2, watching instructions provided, consider supporting the translator on kofi.
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2. The Loyal Pin period drama; princess/noble lady; childhood friends to lovers; forbidden romance
A love story set in 1950s Thailand, about naughty but charming Princess Anilaphat and prim but kind Lady Pin, who are close friends and have grown up together.
YouTube
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3. Uranus2324 movie; sci-fi; astronaut/diver
Story of Lin, an astronaut who is about to embark in a remarkable space mission and Kath, a passionate free diver who is willing to defy the limits of time and space just to meet with her lover over and over again.
Netflix of South Asian countries (can be accessed with VPN)
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4. Petrichor crime; investigation; cop/forensic doctor
Lieutenant Tul, a rookie officer and Dr Cherran, a physician from the Institute of Forensic Sciences, become reluctant partners.
iQIYI
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5. 23.5 high school setting; secret admirer
Ongsa moves to a new school and meets Sun, a cute popular girl who she immediately falls for. However, she decides to approach Sun in instagram dms under the pseudonym Earth, leading Sun to believe she's talking to a guy. But Ongsa does not want to lose the opportunity to talk to Sun, so she decides to keep the fact that she is a girl a secret and continue talking as Earth.
YouTube
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6. Ayaka Is In Love With Hiroko office setting; comedy; misunderstanding
Ayaka, a young office worker, is madly in love with her senior team leader, Hiroko. As Ayaka tries to make her attraction known, Hiroko consistently misreads the situation, thinking that Ayaka is a straight girl.
GagaOOLala
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7. Soul Sisters period drama; wuxia; crossdressing; arranged marriage
Gu Jinyu has disguised herself as a man since childhood. While undercover, she is kidnapped by Bai Yunxi, the sweet but clumsy heiress, and forced into a marriage. The two form an unexpected partnership to save the failing stronghold, facing rival plots, enemies, and challenges.
iQIYI. *Because of chinese laws demanding censorship of queerness, the romance is censored and toned down to sapphic homoerotism for the show to be able to be broadcast. Nevertheless it's pretty obviously meant to be a romance.
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8. Couple of Mirrors period drama; socialite/assassin
You Yi is a kind-hearted socialite and a successful author. Her perfect life is turned upside-down when she discovers a betrayal by the two most trusted people in her life. With no one left to turn to, she finds refuge in the friendship and support of Yan Wei, a lonely female killer disguised as the owner of a photo studio. YouTube. the show doesn’t have a happy ending, but it can be a happy ending for you if you stop watching at episode 12 timestamp 28:02. *Adapted from an explicitly queer novel, the show is undeniably and obviously queer, but nevertheless the queer romance part is censored.
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9. Affair childhood friends to lovers; love triangle
A girl's life is upended by family bankruptcy. Her best friend becomes a source of comfort. They get separated, but years later they reunite, reigniting old memories and feelings amidst changed circumstances.
YouTube & iQIYI
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10. Us love triangle
Dokrak crosses paths with an older dentistry student Pam during her coffee shop shift and gradually develops a crush. When her brother Kawi meets Pam, he falls for her at first sight. Kawi turns to Dokrak, asking her to play matchmaker and Dokrak agrees.
YouTube
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11. The Secret of Us exes to lovers
Dr. Fahlada guards her heart due to a past love, rendering her unable to open up again. Her situation becomes complicated when she has to work with Earn, her ex girlfriend, who has come to work with her at the hospital.
Netflix & Ch3+
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12. Pluto twins; blind character
Twins Ob-oom and Ai-oon are worlds apart until Ob-oom's wedding, when she tasks Ai-oon with breaking up her affair with May. A tragic turn leaves the newlywed comatose, and Ai-oon must carry out the request, only to find May is blind. And fall in love with her.
YouTube
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13. Reverse 4 You superpowers
One sister foretells the future, and the other controls time. When a promised love seems doomed to tragedy, the pair sets out to change fate itself.
Netflix
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14. She Makes My Heart Flutter bar setting; niece and aunt dynamic
The extroverted Gang Seol is hired by her aunt Jung at her only-women bar. Even though they are both lesbians, they seem to be worlds apart and have very different love stories.
YouTube
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15. Sleep With Me radio; disabled character in a wheelchair
A science textbook writer with a sleep disorder meets a wheelchair-using radio host who runs the midnight shift. This chance encounter at the radio station quickly sparks their interest in each other.
GagaOOLala
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16. GAP The Series office setting; boss/employee; class difference
Long after Sam first came to Mon's rescue when they were kids, Sam is unambiguously Mon's idol. In order to be near Sam, Mon gets a job working under her. When they finally meet again at the office, Mon is surprised by Sam’s icy exterior, so different from the image she'd had of her. Mon and Sam aren't just different in demeanour; they stand apart in class and age.
YouTube
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17. Lucky My Love office setting
In the pursuit of love, Nabdao has been doing everything. She has got her fortune read. She's gone on a string of blind dates. Unfortunately, no one seems to be on the same page as her. She starts to think that perhaps her gorgeous and caring boss Pheem could be the one for her. Then Vela, her new team leader, comes into the picture and shakes things up with her observant and affectionate care.
YouTube
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18. Show Me Love beauty pageants
Meena moves to Bangkok to achieve her singing dreams. She chances across Cherine who asks Meena to join her in a beauty pageant. The girls' journey for the crown begins and a romance between them sparks.
YouTube
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19. My Marvellous Dream Is You magical dreams; actress/personal stylist
Dawan's father abandons their family to elope with a neighbor girl's father. Turns out this is Kimhan, who Dawan has been seeing in her strange yet lovely dreams for years. While they become friends in reality, Dawan hides her deeper feelings, as in her dreams their bond goes far beyond friendship. She never realizes that Kimhan shares the same dreams.
YouTube
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20. Unlock Your Love
Rain locked up her heart after getting disappointed in her past relationship. However, things turn around when Love enters her life. They embark on a journey to “unlock their love.”
YouTube
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21. Love Bully barwoman/heiress; obstacles
Irene and Night meet at the bar Night works in the night Irene returns from overseas, and hit it off instantly. However, their passionate relationship is threatened by meddling people who want to ruin it.
YouTube
Various chinese WLW mini web-dramas.
Various chinese WLW short films.
WLW as side couples:
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1. Wedding Plan mlm wedding planner/groom; lavender marriage
Nuea is a professional wedding planner. Sailom happens to be the perfect man for Nuea based on his visual considerations for a man. But the universe has an unimaginable sense of humor as Sailom and his fiance Yiwa turn out to be Nuea's new clients.
Uncut 18+ on iQIYI or cut on Youtube & iQIYI (special episode), girls don't have high heat scenes here so you can just watch Youtube version for them
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2. Love Sea mlm rich big city writer/countryside diver; class difference; wlw personal assistant/celebrity
Tongrak is a writer of popular romance novels. After travelling to countryside in search of inspiration, he chances to meet an irritating southern man Mahasamut. When they end up in bed together, however, Tongrak finds himself hooked. Tongrak has a secretary Mook and a popular actress best friend Vi. Vi enjoys ordering Mook around as if she was her own assistant.
Uncut 18+ on iQIYI or cut on Youtube
With smaller screentime there are wlw side couples in shows: Bad Buddy, I Feel You Linger In The Air (this one has period typical homophobia and assault though, so careful).
Bigger list of asian GL shows: link [tumblr post].
Transfeminine representation in asian QLs:
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1. 23.5
Secondary couple are a pair of teachers, both of them trans women played by trans women. For now this is the only show that has a sapphic trans plotline, even though small.
YouTube
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8950212f36a69177d19be9cd054c3301/2727d39f336d8143-87/s540x810/0bbd05999564aaf1a7b6c3996d8ba44a9fd7226a.jpg)
2. 3 Will Be Free polyamorous trio; on the run; mafia
After an unexpected event that involves sex work and mafia gangs, three individuals find themselves on-the-run together as they attempt to escape death. Important secondary character is a trans woman played by a trans female actress. Has a trans storyline in the show (the girl gets male romantic partners). Trigger warning for transphobia. YouTube
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/27c7f0f2da7d34d31547cfeabb5a0d5a/2727d39f336d8143-1b/s540x810/f732170220724b76f129c868d3d81b636b657296.jpg)
3. Secret Crush On You “nerd”/popular guy; queer friend group; university setting
A nerdy young man Toh fell in love with a popular third-year senior. Because his dream is so far from reach, observing is the only thing he could do. Toh has a queer friend group, one of them is a transfeminine/3rd gender/kathoey character Daisy. Can be a bit jarring for a western person at first, but her story is very lovely if you give this girl a chance (also gets male romantic partner).
YouTube
Noticeable small appearances of trans female characters: The Sign (the actress Yoshi was the 2019 winner of Thailand's biggest trans beauty pageant, YouTube), Not Me (YouTube), You're My Sky (Viki), KinnPorsche (iQIYI).
Sadly we aren't at a point where Thailand makes shows with trans people as leads yet, even though I so badly wish it was already a thing. But trans women and kathoey generally have supporting roles in BL and GL shows very often, so you can see them a lot in stuff! It's the transmascs who never ever appear here!
Queer shows directed by trans women and transfem people:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6f46908fe69b67826952bdb09fef63b5/2727d39f336d8143-4d/s540x810/40ef86846b637c472c95b3f0f88196c4b5c2540a.jpg)
Anucha Boonyawatana is a trans woman and the director of Not Me, mlm show about anarchist freedom fighters (YouTube).
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d633aa57fd487e3229cf1a37fd6cc69b/2727d39f336d8143-fe/s540x810/b05cc7508c05135ef6ba67875152334274030488.jpg)
Golf Tanwarin is a nonbinary director and the first openly transgender person to have been elected as a member of parliament in Thailand. They were the one who submitted the thai marriage equality bill to parliament, which since then has been approved in 2024 and came in legal force 2 weeks ago. Their directing works: Love Bully (wlw, listed above), The Eclipse (mlm show about repressed boys in a corrupted school system, YouTube), Wandee Goodday (mlm boxer/doctor romcom, Viki).
Just in case, adding shows where I personally enjoyed headcanoning characters as transgirls or enby transfems sometimes:
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8be2e1da54628f1d8f08b9a610ab7f10/2727d39f336d8143-8d/s540x810/90ec75c191ed58f12270c0ea089d3b50c7c5df5b.jpg)
1. Meet You At The Blossom
Romantic interest is wearing female clothes and makeup for disguise in the first episodes, and despite not passing well no one questions that this is a woman. The character is happily called "wife" by the lead character until the end of the show.
YouTube & GagaOOLala & Viki & iQIYI
2. The Sign
Main character used to be a female snake princess in his past reincarnation. Sometimes played by a female actress, sometimes by a male actor, but always referred to as a princess and wearing period thai female clothes. It's also possible to headcanon the character as a transmasc here though, it's really neat.
YouTube
Many of all these shows are free on YouTube, in other cases I recommend paying for subscriptions to show appreciation and support of content in order to get more of it in the future, but if you can't or don't want to, you can watch online on KissKH or get files from MkvDrama!
Blogs you can follow to get updates and posts specifically about asian GLs: @girlsloveupdates @glgifs
#asks#gl dramas#ql#wlw#lesbian#sapphic#transgender#sorry im sleep deprived so there might be mistakes but if anyone notices anything tell me i will fix them#also sorry bun i wanted to make gifs but my other project is so big it took the whole night and all past nights :( i tried picking the most#fitting posters but they still don't represent the essence of those shows that well
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chasing sleep (roman godfrey x reader)
WARNINGS: 18+, piv sex, morning sex, attempting-to-stay-quiet sex, Roman loves tits (oops), reader on top, dub-con elements, needle-gate is back lol, dark!Roman returns, fluff, angst, and reader is fucking brainwashed cause girl stand up for yourself wdym
summary: everything seems to be going perfect for you-- you've got the guy, after all. however, you're still haunted by the life you gave away to be with him, and specifically, the girl you left behind. will Roman ever fully trust that you won't leave him?
word count: 11,308 (merry christmas tihi)
PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12
a/n: celebrating 700 followers AND christmas with this monster of a chapter!! I love all of you, thank you once again for your amazing support, I LOVE YOU!! this fanfic is nearing the end now, so... hold on tight for what's about to come;) ENJOY, MWAH<3
"You didn't say goodbye, and now a part of me believes that means you're coming back,"
Over and over again, those words echoed in my ears. I had read it in a passage somewhere, probably in the new romance novel I had picked up a few days ago, and now it truly haunted me. Latched onto my guilt, my love, my very being-- I wasn't sure whether I was capable of letting it all go, despite how happy Roman made me.
Was that maybe why I ended up right here, right now?
"Do you think it could work again?" Letha echoed, turning to me. Her legs were dangling off my roof as we sat by the edge. A soft breeze moved her long, blonde hair away from her shoulders, and just like that, I was reminded of how truly beautiful she was. It must be a genetic thing for all the Godfreys to be breathtaking. However, the look in Letha's green eyes told me something was wrong, but I couldn't put my finger on it. It was almost as though I was looking back at her with a grey-ish filter, like my vision was making it seem like we were sitting in a cloud of fog. None of this looked real.
"What could?" I asked, turning to check my surroundings-- yeah, this was definitely my roof. Why were we here?
"Us," Letha's gaze awaited me as I faced her again, and it was heartbreakingly sad. "You and I. Our friendship."
It felt like I had dipped the tips of my fingers in cold water. "Letha... Come on," I reached for her hand, placing mine above hers with a sigh; "This ended a long time ago. I don't think we can salvage this--"
"But what if we could?" Letha's voice was so painfully sweet, so insistent. "Do you think it could work again?"
"What could?"
"Us," she breathed, turning her hand to intertwine our fingers with an unusually hard grip. It didn't feel so sweet anymore. "You and I. Our friendship."
The red lights in my mind went off like police sirens-- something was off. With my next glance at her hair, it was no longer that same warm shade of blonde. Now, I could argue it was actively turning white before my eyes.
This wasn't real. "Letha?"
"Yes?"
"... Am I dreaming?"
Letha's eyes softened as the green in them dulled down, bordering a bleak color of grey. "Yes," she said. "I'm looping it until you're honest."
"What do you mean?--"
"You'll wake up when you tell me the truth. If you want to help your subconscious let go of the guilt, you should do it,"
My heart was actively breaking. Looking into Letha's blank eyes, I realized it reminded me of the look she had on her face when I first told her about Roman and me. "Ask, then,"
I could see her emotions clutching her soul like an unforgiving fist despite this only being a dream. My head didn't have any problems conjuring the image of her as a kicked, wounded puppy. She spoke; "Do you think it could work again?"
I indulged with a soft sigh; "What could, Letha?"
"Us," she said, allowing tears to well in her eyes. "You and I. Our friendship."
I felt it truly, brutally, that I didn't know what to say. I didn't know if it would break me to be honest. "I can't leave Roman for you," I breathed. "I won't. So I doubt you and I could be friends again as long as I'm still with him."
Letha nodded, turning away to look up at the full moon above us. The hand she had in mine was starting to turn cold. "Do you think it could work again?"
Oh, she was asking again-- was my answer maybe not the truth? Not the right answer? Did my sleeping subconscious know? "What could?" I echoed, growing tired of the loop we were caught in.
"Us," Letha closed her eyes as her chest raised and fell with her shallow breaths. "You and I. Our friendship."
I decided to give it less thought-- that was the key, sometimes. Roman had taught me that. Could it? Could it truly? "Honestly?"
"Honestly,"
It didn't take long before I realized tears were threatening to spill from my eyes too. I had missed the smell of Letha's sweet perfume. It smelled like home and a comforting hug hello. "Yeah. I think it could work," It was weird to hear me say it out loud; "I was always in love with Roman, but you... You taught me how to love in the first place. If we could both forgive each other, I think we'd have a chance. Yet... I don't think I ever can. Fully."
Letha didn't open her eyes, barely moved an inch. She opted for a short, melancholic nod as her lower lip gave in to a tremble. "I'm afraid I'll miss you forever," she whispered, mostly to herself.
And suddenly, I couldn't feel the weight of her hand in mine. My gaze darted down to what was previously our union, only to find that she wasn't there anymore. I looked up to find a slow line of evaporating smoke, similar to a trail coming from Roman's cinnamon cigarettes.
With my next heave of air accompanied by a lonely tear rolling down my cheek, I allowed my hand to reach out to touch the fog. It was thick, and it prickled the tips of my fingers to the likes of a cactus-- my sorrow clouded my instincts, and I didn't retract my hand. I hadn't allowed myself to feel any of this, after all. I had been so wrapped up in Roman, so wrapped up in the new feelings that washed over my body, that I had buried all the old ones.
However, Letha kept her promise-- I was released.
Released from the loop, but with one foot remaining in the quicksand of guilt.
And as I awoke, it felt like I had been thrown into a cold pond. With a quick breath, I arched off the bed, gasping; "Roman!"
Frantic beyond words, I heaved for air, blinking rapidly to wake myself up. The morning sun shone through Roman's curtains with soft rays, and I was hit with the smell of a burnt candle. Still hyperventilating, I put a hand on my chest as I tried to turn around, but to no avail.
Why couldn't I move? Was I maybe still stuck in the dream?
Oh, wait-- It was at this moment that I realized I had a heavy arm around me, keeping me still with my back pressed up against human warmth.
I let out a shaky breath, a relieved smile spreading across my lips-- Roman.
My panic gradually subsided, washing away with calm waves as I turned my head to look at him. The sun did him good. Roman's hair was a very specific shade of brown, but in the sun, it had twinges of orange and golden hues. If I were to ever bring it up to him, I know he'd protest and say he was nowhere near ginger. He wasn't, and I was aware of that; as usual, he wouldn't get the point.
After some careful maneuvering, I managed to turn in Roman's heavy embrace, facing him. His plush lips were gently parted, and his long, brown lashes weighed over his eyes-- he also had a rather hefty case of bedhead which I couldn't help but find beyond endearing. Up close like this, completely still, I could see the nearly invisible freckles painting the apples of his cheeks, study the curve of his upper lip, and the scar-like indent on his right cheek. I dared to trace my thumb over it, feeling the softness of Roman's skin against the pad of my finger-- this was beauty unmatched.
He was so beautiful.
And he was mine.
With the gentlest of pressures, I leaned forward, barely brushing my lips across Roman's. I didn't dare to fully kiss him. I wouldn't dare to wake him up. If only we could lay like this forever, undisturbed and alone.
Forever.
Memories of last night swarmed my brain, pushing out all the memories of Letha's sad, green eyes. I smiled as I realized the ache between my legs hadn't subsided-- the sting remained. It had actually happened. I hadn't made it all up. And I would've stayed engulfed in my cloud of complete and utter awe if Roman hadn't nearly scared the living crap out of me with the following.
His voice was raw with sleep as his eyes remained closed; "It's rude to stare,"
I practically arched right off the bed again. Had Roman not had his arms around me in a deadweight hold, I was sure I'd have flown right down to the floor. "Christ!" I hissed, shocked. How had he known? "Sorry... Did I wake you?"
Roman seemed too sleepy to grant me a proper answer, and he settled for a short grunt; "Sleep,"
"It's already morning!--"
"Don't care. Sleep," With his next breath, he pulled me even closer, until the tips of our noses were touching.
I was almost glad Roman's eyes were closed. At least he didn't see the hefty blush creeping up my cheeks. It dawned on me that he maybe had a point-- we had never had the pleasure of having nowhere to be, with no one to wake us up, or school to go to.
There was one thing I wanted to say, but I was scared he'd get upset at my use of words-- no, fuck it; "You're so pretty," I whispered, reaching up to brush my fingers over the tips of his long, long lashes. "You can't expect me not to stare when you look like this."
Roman's brows drew together, yet he allowed me to do as I pleased in his sleepy state. "I'm not pretty,"
Knew it. "Yeah, you are,"
"Just go to sleep,"
"You're unbelievably pretty,"
"... Please just sleep,"
I was aware that I was annoying him, but something about the way his voice got all harsh in the morning made me want to hear him more. Roman's breath fanned over the skin at the tip of my nose with the gentlest breeze as I sighed against his lips; God, how I loved him. "I don't want to sleep... but I can lay here with you, if you want,"
Roman hummed, the dark rumble in his chest nearly vibrating the bed in the process. "Just don't go anywhere,"
"I won't,"
"Ever,"
"I won't,"
With Roman's next breath, I knew he finally believed me-- finally. It hit him for the first time last night that I wasn't lying when I said I wasn't going anywhere, and it hit him again now. Forever was a dead serious plan of mine, and I was intent on making him understand that no matter what. "You're prettier," he eventually said, nudging my nose with his. "You're like the first pleasant sip of water after you've recovered from a sore throat."
"... Specific,"
Roman let out a short, annoyed groan; "Sleep,"
I didn't want to sleep. I didn't want to possibly face Letha again. With my palms against Roman's soft cheeks, I placed a loving kiss against his parted lips, feeling him sigh into me. "Good morning, Rome,"
He smiled, fulfilled, as though he couldn't hold it back anymore; "Good morning, baby,"
"Did you at least sleep well?--"
"Sleep!"
"... But I really don't want to,"
With another sigh, Roman stirred, pulling me closer to press a lazy kiss to my jaw. "Either you go back to sleep, or we fuck. You gotta give me something to work with, here,"
I stilled. "That's... not a bad idea,"
Roman's classic smirk illuminated my morning. "Turn around, then,"
"Huh?--"
"Trust me,"
Sometimes, when I was lonely, before everything with Roman, I used to kiss the skin between my knuckles and imagine someone else was kissing me. The small sounds, and the tingling sensation pooling in my stomach, would distract me from the unbearable feeling of loneliness. The reality of it.
Which is why, when Roman brought my hand to his mouth, pressing his lips to my knuckles before turning me around, I knew I wasn't alone.
Actually, it wasn't just that that showed me I wasn't-- the repeated strokes of Roman's cock filling me was certainly reminder enough.
It was that sort of lazy morning sex I had only read about in those odd novels my mom would hide around the house, or heard about from my friends which I no longer had. This was a different type of sex from yesterday's, which had been so highly connected and emotional-- and this was not to say that this right now wasn't both connected and emotional, but it was... comforting. Like we were taking joy in being able to do just this. To enjoy one another in a sleepy, slow form.
Roman's grip around my throat wasn't hard or choking-- it was more of a hold to keep me in place as he let out a breathy grunt against my shoulder, sinking into me with slow, lazy strokes from behind. "We should do this more often," Roman murmured against my ear, listening to my small whimpers. "Isn't this fun?"
I could hear his stupidly pretty smile. Fucking Romy Schneider. "What, sex?" Obviously?
Roman's deep laugh against my ear nearly had me shuddering; "In the morning," he purred.
"That's gonna be-- hard," My last words were cut off by the hitch of my breath. This felt too good. "Parents and-- and all." It was true, though. How were we supposed to do this with our parents in the house? I doubted Roman's mom was out on business trips all the time, anyway.
With a small huff, I was pulled even tighter to his chest, almost as a reprimand-- I had no idea why it made my cheeks burn. "You'll learn to be quiet," Roman breathed, kissing up the shell of my ear. "Right?"
"I--"
"You'll be a good little girl for me and be quiet, hm?"
And just as I was about to protest, to remind him it was probably a little rude to have sex with other people in the house (I had no idea actually, was there no etiquette to it?), the hand Roman had around my waist slid between my legs, coaxing them further apart. All my thoughts of having a proper conversation went out the window the second he pressed two fingers to my clit, circling it as his kisses moved to the skin between my ear and my jaw.
It was impossible not to give in to the feeling; Roman was intoxicating. I whimpered with the next brush of his cock against my sweet spot, the different sensations dulling my brain with every thrust-- "Yeah,"
Roman let out a hum of approval; "Just for me?"
"Only-- Only you,"
I could practically feel him melt against me. "That's my girl,"
It was an oddity how much Roman enjoyed the sound of it. How much he enjoyed knowing he finally had a companion in the world. I could feel his cock twitch inside of me with the reminder, with the need to become one.
Because at the end of the day, that's what we were now.
We were one.
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
The next day at school was the easiest day to handle in a while. It didn't matter that people were staring, that my reputation was still tarnished, because I finally felt the stream of love floating my way that I had been craving my whole life.
"You need to start zipping this up," Roman huffed, reaching for the zipper of my jacket. He pulled me closer to the railing he was sitting on by the school entrance, shaking his head. "It's getting cold. Don't be stupid." This was a new level of intimacy. The quiet moments, the small, shared moments of care. He was almost annoyed that I hadn't done it myself, that I hadn't thought to take care of myself, thoughtless little girl.
I loved it when he got protective like this. Absolutely adored it. It only reminded me of how much I loved him, and consequently, how I couldn't tell him.
I glanced at Peter, who sat next to Roman, and held back a snicker. I could bet about a hundred dollars that he had never seen his best friend so ridiculously protective before. "She's not twelve," he tried, nudging Roman's shoulder, earning a displeased grunt.
Oh, of course Peter didn't get it. Roman Godfrey, sweetly zipping up my jacket-- the simplest of all things. Nonetheless, it brought a twinge of scarlet to my cheeks as I spotted a group of cheerleaders passing us on the way to the school entrance; the looks of seething jealousy in their eyes only brought me joy. A part of me wanted the sight of Roman being sweet to leave them with a feeling of pure agony. I wanted them all to suffer. Always. For their heads to be bashed in like Jasmine nearly did to herself into her locker; I wished it upon them. On them all.
... I needed to snap out of this.
Roman had been right-- it was getting chilly in Hemlock Grove. I shivered when he finished buttoning my buttons, smiling down at him where he sat with Peter, glad none of them could read my thoughts. I wondered whether Roman would be horrified or... comforted by the fact that I was capable of wishing cruelty upon others, just like him.
It didn't matter. None of it did. Especially not now that he was looking up at me with those big, green eyes of his with his hands tucked into his jacket, looking handsome as ever. From this angle, Roman's shoulders were almost broader, and the more I thought about his physique, the more I thought about last night when he was completely undressed.
Completely undressed, on top of me, loving me.
... Loving me.
If only he did.
Fuck-- I couldn't think about that right now. The need to draw him in and have him all over again would overcome me soon, and I needed to push it down. It would be quite unfortunate if I started acting like a cat in heat every time I saw him from now on. "I need to get to class," I said, keeping my hands to myself despite how much I wanted to run them through Roman's hair.
His eyes softened as he scanned me, jacket fully zipped up and all. "What do you have now?" he asked, now toying with the fabric of my pockets.
"Math, sadly,"
Peter looked like he couldn't wait to escape the tension that ensued the two of us being in such close proximity. "Oh, right," Peter muttered, clicking his tongue against his palate as he sat back on the banister. "Math, second period... With Letha, right?"
The name was enough to make me freeze, and just for a second, it felt like the air got colder. I was sure I might've even flinched. The image of Letha in my dreams, white as though drained of blood, clouded my vision as my heart started to thump painfully. Why was I reacting like this?
Also, Roman looked like he had been greatly offended by something. With furrowed brows, he sat back and sent Peter a look of what the fuck. "How do you even know that?" he muttered, reaching one arm forward to drag me closer by my waist, his eyes not leaving Peter's to scan his every minuscule reaction.
I was relieved by Roman's touch-- my fingers dipped into the short hair at the nape of his neck, unsure what was happening.
On the other hand, Peter seemed to have a hard time recovering from what I could only guess was a slip-up. "I don't know," he said, shrugging as his eyes shied away. "I just remember it, I guess."
Roman snapped; "Why?"
Okay-- I didn't want to be here for this conversation. I couldn't hear more about Letha, not after my cryptic dream. It didn't make matters any better that Peter was right, and that I would see her in my next class. I stopped playing with Roman's hair, placing a short kiss to the top of his head; "I'm heading off," I mumbled, nodding shortly to Peter before excusing myself.
Having got a quick whiff of Roman's heavy, intoxicating perfume, I closed my eyes and clutched my books tightly to my chest as I walked to class. The sheer smell of him, the softness of his hair, the kindness of his gestures-- it all made my head wander back to last night. The way it felt to have him inside me, how he took care of me, and how good it all felt. Allowing the memories to float back into my mind, I didn't realize I was walking around with a bright smile on my face until I sat down in math class and got a few odd looks from the other students around my seat. I wasn't usually this cheery, I suppose.
Life felt good. When I thought about Roman, everything felt great. I made myself comfortable behind my desk, feeling my tummy tingle with my reminiscing of last night; I wanted him more than ever. Now that I knew we could be together like that, I wasn't sure how I was supposed to be able to detach from him. And just as I thought I was about to explode into a burst of butterflies, I stuck my hand in my coat to reach for my phone, only to find what felt like crumbled-up paper.
Confused, I unfolded it;
i miss the look on your face when you cum. miss you miss you miss you. let's find a quiet place somewhere and get very very noisy after school, what do you think about that? do tell. i want to know your every thought, actually. what makes you tick, and so forth. know that i'm probably thinking about you right now. always.
- your favorite (hopefully)
Oh, Roman and his notes. When had he managed to put it in there? A few minutes ago, when he toying with my pockets? Sneaky. I was dead sure my cheeks had turned a peculiar shade of pink by the time I felt someone put down their bag in the empty seat next to me, and I was too drunk on the euphoria to glance at my partner for today's class. How I loved Roman-- I loved him to the point where the tips of my fingers burned when I thought about him. And knowing he was probably in class now as well, thinking about me too... no, it was almost too much to bear.
However, when something much harder to face suddenly sat down next to me, I would've loved to get sucked right back into my tingling cave of Roman-comfort.
Letha.
Letha was here.
Letha was sitting next to me, gazing back at me with those trademark green Godfrey eyes.
Fuck. I immediately crumbled up the note, stuffing it down my pocket to hide the content of it from her. Knowing Letha, she'd probably barf at the sight of the first sentence. "What are you doing?" I hissed, glancing around to scour the classroom for empty seats. "There's a free table two rows down--"
"I like sitting here," Letha's face remained free of strong emotion, and she turned away to unpack her supplies. "It's close to the window, and I need the natural sunlight. It helps the headache I get from the lamps in here, don't you remember?"
She said it so matter-of-factly, and for a second, it felt as though I had been teleported back to two months ago. I didn't know how to act around Letha anymore. "Sure," I mumbled. Just my luck.
As class started, I would glance over at Letha every once in a while. She seemed so peaceful, undisturbed by my presence, and I wasn't sure why that annoyed me to this extent. Was it perhaps the fact that she sought out forgiveness from me when she refused to give me any in return? That she was seeking acceptance about the situation only when it suited her?
It was odd to look at Letha and see her in colours. After my dream last night, I could only see her in her undead form, dead to me.
To my dismay, Letha leaned over to my side of the table a little later that class; "Do you have a pencil?" she whispered.
A Godfrey asking to borrow my pencil? It usually led to no good. Still, I handed her one--
"Thank you,"
"No problem,"
This was so weird. It felt too normal, yet it was agony to act that it was. However, the situation only worsened when the teacher asked us to work in pairs and solve an equation on the board. I held my breath, daring to glance at Letha; she was already looking at me. "You have no clue how to solve this stuff, do you?"
I shrugged. She knew me too well. "You've probably already solved it in your head,"
Letha's smile was kind, genuine. "Want me to show you how to do it?"
"Nah,"
"Do you even do your homework anymore?"
I knew her question was coming from a good place. I could feel it. After all, I barely managed to do my homework when Letha and I had regular study sessions at her place. Just thinking about it made me remember the sweet smell of her sheets, which never mixed well with the incense she was always burning for 'good karma'. "Roman has a guy that does them for him, and I write my answers off of his," I mumbled.
I expected the mention of him to put her off-- yet Letha simply nodded, raising her brows in a conniving look. "He's corrupted you,"
"I've let him,"
"I know," Letha's green eyes shimmered with words untold as she echoed; "I know."
It was odd to face her like this. For her to know my feelings for Roman, and not walk off this time. This was the first conversation we'd had in months where we weren't at each other's throats. And suddenly, Letha took the leap I wasn't allowed to take-- she leaned in closer as she dared to whisper the forbidden words; "I miss you,"
Oh no. "Letha--"
"You never said goodbye, and now a part of me believes you're coming back,"
I let out a shaky breath as I moved my chair further away from hers. What she said had been too close to the words in my dream last night. It was chilling. "Of course I never said goodbye," I hissed back, feeling my emotions boil to a simmer. "You didn't let me." There it was, laid out in the open. "You cut me off, Letha." She had. "And you left me for dead!"
Letha held her breath high in her chest as her mouth formed a tight line. It wasn't until she moved her chair closer to mine and gripped the table harder that she allowed herself to breathe; "I left you for dead because you basically fucking stabbed me!"
"I didn't mean to!"
"And you think I did?" Letha hissed. "You gave me no choice!"
"That's not true! I came clean to you, and the least you could've done was to!--"
"Yeah, well, I'm sorry!"
We stared at one another in silence. There it was, my apology, served on a silver platter. I had heard it once before, but Roman wasn't here to control the outcome of it this time. Something within the bounds of my soul was relieved of anger and tension, and I couldn't halt the result of it; "I'm sorry too,"
Letha froze for a good second or two. Her lips parted in disbelief as her grip on the table lifted, and she sat back in her chair with a slow nod. It gradually dawned on her what this meant for us.
"Do you think it could work again?"
I indulged with a soft sigh; "What could, Letha?"
"Us," she said, allowing tears to well in her eyes. "You and I. Our friendship."
It was easier to breathe, all of a sudden. I knew that an apology wasn't enough to mend our wounds, but it was a start. I nodded along with Letha and watched as the corners of her mouth tugged upwards into a smile-- I caught myself mirroring it.
"So..." she tried.
"So..."
"Did you hear that Brooke Bluebell bought a big needle from a pharmacy?"
I grimaced; "What? No, why?"
"To get her revenge on Roman," Letha held back a laugh, biting down on her lip as she turned to write down the answer to the math equation. "From a few months ago, if you remember the whole ordeal."
"Oh," I breathed. "Needle-gate?"
"Needle-gate,"
Despite how concerning the big needle sounded, it was a funny reminder of the past; "I've gotta tell Roman,"
"Yeah, you better. I think he's blocked me, so I'm out of the picture," Letha sat back in her chair after finishing her work, and she glanced back at me as she tapped the pencil against the paper. "You've gotta tell him about prom too."
"... Prom?"
"Yes, prom," Grabbing her bag, Letha rummaged around for a few seconds until she found a flyer. It was purple, super lavish-- "It's in two weeks, I think. Kinda short notice, but I have a feeling he'd secretly want to go. He's into the classics, so I'd suggest you indulge him."
I felt my cheeks turn red as I kept my eyes on the flyer. Just the thought of me in a dress, Roman in a suit; it made me warm. Uncomfortably warm. "I think he'd rather die, actually," I mumbled, handing it back to Letha. "Are you going?"
"Meh, don't think so," She stuffed the flyer back into her bag and sighed, reaching for her phone. "The guy that I'm into says he doesn't want to go, so I'll stay home."
It hit me that this was the first time I didn't know who Letha had a crush on. Previously, she would tell me all about them. There was a Tyler, there was a Scott, and then there was a third one who had a really peculiar last name. And just as I was about to scour my brain for more names, a particular one popped up on Letha's phone as she turned it on;
Peter: I think it's time to...
That was all I was able to see, as she needed to click on it to read the whole message. My eyes widened as I sat back in my chair, sending Letha an odd look. It was clear by her body language that she hadn't intended for me to see that, and she immediately flipped her phone.
... Was something going on?
Letha cleared her throat and turned back to me with the same smile, yet it felt disingenuous. "That's a different Peter," she said, a somewhat panicked squeak to her voice. "It's the neighbour. He might be complaining about the amount of cars my dad has parked on our street, cause they don't fit into our garage anymore. It needs to be discussed, apparently. It's time, or whatever."
That seemed like a typical rich-kid problem. I could somewhat buy it. "Is it a Godfrey thing to be crazy about cars?"
"Just you wait until you hear about the cigarettes. Dad's a real chain-smoker,"
"... Don't tell me they're cinnamon-flavoured?"
Letha sighed; "Sadly, yeah. The garage smells like a goddamn gingerbread house,"
The laughter that followed wasn't intentional, and it blended in with the ring of the bell.
This was nice. To see the smile on Letha's face felt good, like a warm soup when you have a cold. It was a comfort to know that we could finally be normal around each other, despite the fact that we would possibly never be friends again like before, or even forgive one another. I doubted that I ever could, fully.
However, just as I was about to excuse myself, I spotted a silhouette by the door which made my blood run cold.
Fuck.
Roman.
I saw it in his eyes immediately. The confusion, which quickly morphed into something darker, anger-like. My laughter died down in an instant as my body kicked into a fight-or-flight response, suddenly scared out of my mind to be caught laughing with Letha-- she seemed to catch on momentarily, but remained in her seat as she watched me shove all my supplies and books into my backpack, hurrying to get to Roman.
I had forgotten that he wanted to pick me up after class. I had forgotten my promise to not fraternise with the enemy-- fucking stupid.
Hoping to conceal the slight tremble in my hands, I put one of them on Roman's arm when I caught up to him in the doorway, smiling up at him with an anxious breath stuck in my chest. "Hey, you," I tried, giving the sleeve of his shirt a gentle tug as I always did, a plea for him to bend down and kiss me. It was impossible to reach all the way up to his lips without it, anyway.
But Roman's attention hadn't left Letha. His eyes had narrowed, glaring at her with fury apparent in the way his jaw clenched. Had telepathy been a real thing, I'd have thought they were yelling at each other through their minds. I almost wanted to butt in and say Letha wasn't bothering me, that we were having a normal conversation-- however, I knew that would only make it worse.
"Come," Roman said with a low growl, unlike anything I had heard from him before. With one last scorned look at Letha, he gripped my wrist and started marching down the hallway; I didn't expect to be yanked from my place the way I was, and I was sure my legs were fully in the air for a microsecond or two; "Roman!--"
"This day just keeps getting worse," he muttered, not waiting for me to find my balance as he continued to drag me down the hallway.
Roman's grip around my wrist was hard. "Slow down!" I tried, grabbing his arm with my free hand. "It's not what it looks like! It's not-- " Everything about this made me dizzy, and his sudden anger made the familiar feeling of dread pool in my stomach. It only got worse when he pulled me into an empty classroom, slamming the door shut behind us.
I took a few steps away from him, waiting for the bomb to explode. My breath came out in short, ragged motions as my hands remained clenched by my sides in anticipation. It felt like I was five years old again, waiting to get reprimanded for having drawn on the walls. "Roman, I--"
"Shut up," Of all the things I expected, it wasn't this. Not at all. Because suddenly, my body was pressed against the door of the classroom with Roman's arms around me, and his lips pressing needy kisses to my neck. My bag dropped to the floor-- What the...?
"Not here," was all I managed to say before my breath hitched, and my hands automatically flew up into his hair. "Roman, please, wait--"
"No," He was more dismissive than ever-- I wondered why I sort of liked it. Why it made my stomach tingle, why I wanted him to do whatever he wanted to me. Was it possibly after what had happened last night? "No more bullshit."
I closed my eyes, hoping we'd have a few seconds to disperse if someone walked in on us right now. With the force of Roman's weight against mine keeping the door firmly shut, I was sure of it. My head lulled against the door as I felt him latch on a particular spot on the side of my neck, marking my skin with his possession. I knew I was screwed-- you can't get more screwed than this.
I was sure I disassociated for a few seconds, because suddenly, Roman's lips brushed against my ear, and I had to suppress a shiver. "We're gonna have a damn serious talk," he said, keeping me still against the door. "We need it. I need it."
Something told me we wouldn't be talking much if he continued kissing me like this. "Let's-- Let's talk, then,"
When Roman pulled away, I could finally see the frustration on his face. The way his brows were drawn together, how high his breath was in his chest, and the narrow glare of his gaze. Still, I didn't think it would result in this; it took me a while to realize his hands were no longer at my sides, and that they were now unzipping my jeans.
"What are you doing?" I breathed, grabbing at his wrists. "Don't--"
"You think you can outsmart me?" It was as though someone had ripped the curtains off its hinges, now revealing what was always hidden behind them. Roman's breath fell heavy against my cheek as a small twitch of his upper lip revealed his inner turmoil; "You think you can tell me one thing, and then do the opposite when I'm not looking?"
My anxiety grew as I realized Roman's strength was unmatched. There was nothing I could do to fight him. "What are you talking about?" It was hard to come up with a cohesive sentence when I was this stressed.
"Peter told me, y'know," Roman continued, a low growl in his voice prevalent in ways it had never been before. "He told me the obvious, of course. That Letha is trying to reconcile, that she misses you... But then he told me the part I didn't know. The part you probably didn't want me to know."
It was with his last ominous words that he managed to dip his fingers past my waistband, past the hem of my underwear, and placed two fingers on my clit. The unexpected touch immediately made me squirm against the door, squeezing my eyes shut. "Why-- Why are you doing this?" was all I managed to stutter out, my hands still locked around his wrist. He knew I didn't want this. He knew. "I don't-- don't know what you're--"
"Talking about?" Roman rubbed rough circles around my clit as he placed his forehead against mine, pressing my head further up against the door. "Oh, so you're not gonna tell me?" His voice got more patronizing, as though this was fifth grade and he was teasing me in the courtyard-- "Is my good little girl gonna be real stupid and not tell me? You wanna act dumb with me, huh?"
Something about his tone made my cheeks burn. His tone, his words. This was not a good way to find out about a possible kink. My mind dulled with the stimulation against my clit, and it didn't take long before I eventually felt my arousal pooling. In all ways of the word, I felt like my body was betraying me. "Not here," I echoed, breath hitching. It felt like he was pressing a button on me, like I was a toy, thoughtlessly repeating it over and over; "Not here, Rome-- N-Not, here, please--"
"I'll stop when you tell me,"
"Tell you what?" I cried, squeezing his wrists as my hips bucked into his hand. Roman knew how to touch me, even if it was at my disadvantage. My mind was racing; someone could walk in, someone could see, someone could--
"How Letha helped you get us back together," Roman's breath was so warm, so angry, against my face, it felt like he was drawing my scorching red blush on my cheeks. "How you went and asked her for advice on how to decrypt me? Maybe you don't know me at all, is that it?"
I didn't want to think about this. I didn't want to be present. I didn't want to think about the fact that Roman had gotten the information all twisted, that Peter must've had quite an extensive talk with Letha to even know parts of this story, and that Roman couldn't find another way to talk it out than to do it like this. Forcefully. Because right now, it felt too good. It felt way too good. The sensation of his fingers rubbing circles into my clit, running them between my folds to gather up my slick, only to return to my bundle of nerves to make my legs shake with a mix of anxiety and pleasure, felt too good.
"That's not true," I tried in between heaves of air. What would it make me if I came like this? "That's not-- not true, Rome--"
"I won't ever be enough for you, will I?"
"No-- no, you're everything!--"
"Because the end of the day, you'll go back to Letha," Roman's voice was tight, restricted, as though he was holding back a heap of emotions. "No matter what I do, how gently I fuck you, treat you, you won't want to be with me forever. No one does."
If only he knew. If only he knew that I loved him. My hands let go of his wrist, and I placed my palms against his chest, forcing some space between us with a push. That seemed to do the trick-- Roman's fingers slowed down as our eyes met, and he was faced with my watery gaze. "I didn't lie last night," I said after finally catching my breath. "I've never lied to you." An unnervingly big part of me longed for him to rub me through my high, which was not too far away from the horizon, but the sane part of me knew I had to put an end to his venture into the dark ways of his past.
Roman's mouth pulled into a straight line; "Peter wouldn't lie to me either,"
"I'm not saying he is. He just got the story wrong,"
There was a long silence, and I knew this was my moment-- I reached for Roman's wrist again, and with careful, slow motions, I got his hand out of my underwear. "Letha heard us fight, and she came over to ask about it afterwards," I started. "There was no plotting. No decrypting. The only thing she told me, was to look for a bigger picture when it comes to fighting with you. I didn't ask for it! And what you saw just now, was us being friendly. Not friends. We will never be again, after everything that happened!"
"But... you were talking on the stairs," Roman echoed, as something in his gaze faltered. "I saw you when we were leaving the party."
Letha's following words were almost icy to the touch, hollow to the ear; "Was I right?"
It felt as though my world stilled. Time stilled. Just for a second, I felt as though I could wade my free hand through the coldness of her phrase, and I could wave away the mirage. She was concerned, curious. Had she genuinely wanted to help me get through this fight with Roman?
"Yeah," I breathed. "You were. Thank you."
Letha's face softened as a relieved sigh escaped her, nodding her head slowly. It had been a long time since the last time she had heard those words from me. "Any time,"
The memory was as fresh as day. "You were right next to me, Roman. If I was hiding something, I wouldn't have talked to her in front of you," I let go of his hand, letting out a shaky breath as he took another step away from me. I could sense that his mind was cracking itself in half. "I don't need Letha to tell me how to fix things with you. Contrary to what you were thinking, I do know you. And I know you well enough to see that this isn't you being angry with me, but rather your fucking abandonment issues surfacing because you haven't dealt with them yet!"
It was clear that Roman didn't expect me to raise my voice, but hell-- I was so done with this behavioural pattern of his.
"It might be good for me to not have the worst relationship with all the girls at this school, have you thought about that?" I said, feeling my fists clench at my sides. "That Letha and I being friendly and not at each other's throats might be good for me? And that it might also be good for your relationship with your cousin, mind you, who you've seemingly blocked?"
Roman remained silent, at a loss for words.
My breathing had yet to calm down, along with my arousal. "You will always be enough for me," I said, softening my tone. "You're all I've ever wanted. I'm not leaving you. But it doesn't matter how many times I tell you this unless you trust me." I zipped up my pants, huffing as I picked up my bag. It felt as though my knees were about to give out-- I could feel my slick dripping into my underwear. This was a feeling I never wanted to revisit again. Ready to storm off, to slam the door behind me with a bang and leave Roman here to wallow in whatever he was feeling at the moment, something else hit me like a blow to the head; "Wait, how did Peter know?"
It couldn't be. It seriously couldn't be.
Roman cleared his throat, no longer meeting my gaze. I could see it in the light pink of his cheeks that he was embarrassed about his outburst. "He said they talked at the party," he mumbled under his breath. "Briefly. Just for a second."
"Ah, is that right?"
Roman caught my tone, glancing up at me through his brows. "Why?"
"Don't you think it's odd?"
"... Maybe, I don't know? I was busy getting laid that night, don't ask me,"
I would've laughed had I not been so pissed off. I could see the lack of reaction on my face getting to Roman, and he gave in to a slight shiver. Finally, the roles were reversed, just for a second. "Rome?"
He looked relieved to hear me use his nickname-- "Yes?"
"You will never do anything like that to me ever again,"
Roman tucked his hands into his pockets, head hanging low. "I... really don't know what came over me--"
"Never," I snapped, biting my teeth together. I was afraid I'd start yelling. "You will never."
I wondered whether anyone had talked to him like this. If this was the first time in history that Roman had gotten a boundary imposed on him. Maybe by his mother when she was scolding him as a child, but after that? I somehow doubted it. He remained silent, eyes fixating on his polished shoes.
Finally getting the opportunity to look at him this close, I spotted the vial of my blood still hanging around his neck, poking out from beneath his shirt. In the back of my mind, after having read that stupid book on upirs, a huge part of me thought he was getting affected by it. That the constant smell of blood right underneath his nose was activating dormant senses, dormant thoughts.
But upirs weren't real.
Not.
Real.
Roman's silence made me feel unimaginably guilty, as though I had been the one to force myself upon him-- he looked like a kicked puppy. I hated it. So, I gathered my next breath; "Could you at least say you're sorry? Then I'll feel better about inviting you home for dinner later,"
Roman's eyes lit up as they met mine, surprised I'd even offer. "You... still want that?"
"I can barely breathe when we're apart, what do you think?"
He let out the breath he had been holding, falling apart; "I'm really sorry,"
I didn't want to dwell on it. Didn't want to think about the fact that the scared look on my face would probably get him going for months on end. That he'd think about it at night, when he woke up, and especially when he got off at the thought of me. The scared look in my eyes.
No. I didn't want to think about it.
Roman was the first to approach, slowly daring to tilt my head up with two fingers underneath my chin and kissing me with the utmost gentle touch. No tongue, no urgency-- just a small, soft brush of our lips against one another, creating sparks that went all the way down into the tips of my fingers.
Letha had been right when she first warned me about him, all those months ago. Roman was the epitome of an asshole. A core so rotten, it was impossible to carve out all the bad. You could try, you could dig, you could pray, but all of it would never go away. It would forever fester in his bones, infect the very basis of his DNA, and course through his veins.
But... when he kissed me like this, I could forget it.
I could forget.
When he kissed me like this, I only loved him more.
I knew I would love him forever.
And as the kiss deepened with the sweetest pressure, I reached for the vial of my blood around Roman's neck-- he didn't notice the way I twisted the capsule, figuring out which way to turn it so it would screw itself off. I had a feeling I would need to know this information in times of crisis.
Just in case.
Just in case. 。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
The rest of the evening went on as normal. Weirdly enough.
Roman had fully snapped out of his rage, and he had turned into a version of himself I hadn't seen before. He wasn't joking around. He wasn't making dirty jokes.
He was... calm.
Assured.
I knew this was probably a form of keeping on the low, to not take a wrong step and blow up in the minefield he had made himself. Roman laid still in my bed with his hands behind his head, watching as I scoured my closet. If there was going to be a prom, I had to look for a dress, right?
"What are you looking for?" he asked, yawning. "Need some help?"
I shrugged, hoping to brush his question off. It was a bit embarrassing to be talking about this, seeing as he hadn't asked me to be his date or anything. "Just looking for a dress... Wondering if I still have the one I'm thinking about,"
"What do you need a dress for?" Roman sat up in the bed, watching me like a puppy would.
"I... like dresses. Need to wear them more often,"
"But it's getting colder, don't you think it's better to wear something warmer for the season?"
What was up with this obsession of his lately? He had to keep me warm at all times, supposedly. "You sound so polite," I mumbled, wading through my clothes. "Stop looking so guilty, please."
Roman let out a sigh, running his hands through his hair. "I feel bad,"
This was intolerable. It gnawed on my heart. "I told you we're fine, so please don't," I turned to him with one hand on my hip, hoping to stare some sense into him; "I even wore this crazy top to make your mood better, look!"
Roman's eyes darted down to the hot pink crop top I was wearing, and he bit down on his growing smile to stay neutral. Nonetheless, I could see it on his face that he remembered exactly where I had gotten it, and possibly the feeling he had back in that closet when he came into the soft fabric of it. "I'd rather you wore my sweater, like usual,"
"It's in the washer. And this top is fucking iconic," I pointed to the words which were stretched out across my chest. "See? 'Rock on', in big, black letters. You need to rock on more, Roman."
His smile immediately cracked, and he propped himself up on his elbows as he leaned down on the bed. "I've done enough rocking for today, that's for sure,"
I finally saw a way I could turn his mood upside down. With a smug smile, I walked over to the pink speaker I got for my seventeenth birthday and connected it to my phone. "Rome, baby, who's big in rock these days?"
Roman chuckled, rolling over on his side to follow me with his eyes. "Depends what type of rock you're looking for,"
"Anything,"
"I don't know, then. Anything from Nirvana to Blur, I suppose,"
Bingo. I guessed that Roman was going for bands he thought I had heard of, and he had hit jackpot. With a click of a button, the intro to Song 2 by Blur started playing through the speakers, which earned me another laugh from my boyfriend. It was a typical rock song-- it started out rather quiet until it broke out into complete chaos.
I crawled back into bed, kissing my way up Roman's stomach, which only made his breath hitch. The giggles brewing in his chest resonated through my body that was pressed up against his, and I joined the laughter as I kissed his rosy cheeks. It was intimate, it was sweet. I loved that I could do this with him now, that he was comfortable enough to be put in a position like this, and that he allowed me to pull stunts like these.
And after all, I decided I would show my love through action, as I couldn't tell him about the extent of my feelings. I knew he'd get up and bolt right out the window like something straight out of a cartoon.
Roman caught his breath, placing his hands on both sides of my face-- all the emotions he couldn't tell me either were on display in his big, green eyes, roaming around the galaxies in his dark pupils. "I trust you,"
"... What?--"
"I keep thinking about what you said earlier," he tried, stroking his thumbs across the soft skin of my cheeks. "I promise I trust you. And I'm sorry that I get in my head about it, because you don't deserve that. You deserve so much better than what I can give you, yet... I want you to stay with me. I really, really want you to stay with me."
This was a rather deep conversation to be having with loud rock music in the background. I should've definitely picked something more mellow. With a sigh, I leaned down to kiss the tip of Roman's nose-- "I told you I'm not going anywhere," I breathed. "I'm yours forever, if you'll have me."
Finally, Roman's eyes lit up. Lit up like fireworks painting the sky. "Forever sounds nice,"
"It does, doesn't it?" It was impossible not to smile.
"It so does,"
It was a relief when he pulled me tightly to his chest and kissed me. It was the type of kiss I had dreamed of having in my bed on a lazy afternoon, the type of kiss which made my heart swell as it beat against his. The type of kiss which I had only ever seen in movies, the type of kiss I could never imagine would feel this good.
No one ever told me that making out with your boyfriend was such a thrill. To be tangled up as one, to be a heap of bodies coming together, to be a mess, and that it would make my whole being vibrate with joy. Roman's lips were so gentle to the touch, yet his kisses were so hot, all-taking, that I wanted nothing more than to melt into him and become one.
It didn't take long before he rolled us over-- I knew he wouldn't be the type to like anyone on top except for him. My hands were in his hair, tugging at the tips of his dark locks to make my fingers busy, as Roman's tongue licked a stripe up my lips; it was so soft, a feathery touch, and it drew out a shaky moan.
I didn't know any of this was possible before I met him. I really had no idea, silly me.
My mind didn't register the meek whine that escaped me, possibly to protect my psyche, as Roman pulled away. A thin string of saliva connected our lips as we simply breathed down at each other, gazing into the other's eyes-- I was sure mine widened a little when I felt something hard pressing against my lower abdomen.
Fuck, that was still damn hot.
It certainly gave the words rock on a new meaning, no?
"I need to ask you something," Roman breathed, followed by a sigh of relief when he heard the song was over. "But don't freak out on me, okay?"
I nodded, eager to have his lips back on mine again; "Sure,"
"And before you judge me, I'm not the biggest fan of this idea myself, cause I think it's kinda lame. Keep that in mind,"
"Okay?"
"So... Heh," Roman let out a soft, nervous laugh, nudging my nose with his. "You might actually want to find a dress for this to work, though."
My fingers traced circles into his hair; "Rome,"
"Yeah?"
"Stop rambling, please,"
"Oh,"
"You were saying?"
"Oh," Roman cleared his throat, placing a short kiss to my lips. "Do you want to go to prom?"
Had I not been trapped beneath him, I would've shot right out of the bed. My eyes widened as I pulled him in for another kiss, hoping to suppress the squeal that threatened to escape me.
"Wait, wait--" Roman's words were muffled against my lips before he raised himself up, still not done. What else was there to say, though? "So, you're going?"
"... What?"
"With friends, or...?"
"Roman, what friends?"
"Ah, right," Once again, he cleared his throat and got all serious again; "So... would you want to go with me?"
It took a second for it to dawn on me that Roman had been genuinely confused. That he thought I would be going with anyone else but him. That he thought, even for just a second, that there was a possibility that I would tell him no. "Are you crazy? Of course!"
Oh, how I loved him.
I loved him to bits.
And here I was, squealing about going to prom. Roman had made me a puddle of girly with his heartthrob-ways. It would've made me sick, had we not immediately gone back to making out, but this time, with bright smiles on our faces. Kissing someone while smiling was definitely in my top three of all things possible on earth.
Second place was being picked up like I weighed nothing, oddly enough. That was one of the perks of having a tall boyfriend, after all.
And the first place was a no-brainer. It was definitely sex.
Oh, and who would've guessed-- we'd end up having sex a few minutes later, believe it or not. When your boyfriend is this hot, it's impossible to resist. It was the type of sex that made up for his behavior at school today, the type of sex that made me melt into the mattress with joy and pleasure.
The cursed hot pink crop top was quickly discarded, and so was my sanity. Roman's kisses grew firm against me, muffling the sounds of my moans as his fingers dug into the soft flesh of my thighs, pinning them down and folding me into submission. It was official-- there seemed to be no etiquette to sex, and my parents being in the house was an obstacle that was easy to deal with.
Just... shut up. Keep your mouth shut. Right?
But it was so damn hard. Especially as Roman angled his cock right up against my sweet spot with the help of the pillow beneath me, making me whine in pleasure against the kiss he had locked me in to ensure my silence. It was impossible. It made my toes curl, made my vision blurry, and made my mind go into complete lockdown. I entered a phase where I almost didn't care, where I couldn't care less at all, and where the only important thing was for Roman to do whatever he wanted to me.
"Fuck-- me," I rambled, my hands skimming the muscular range of his broad back as I felt my need grow insatiable.
Roman let out a huff against me, the smile on his face a visible contradiction; "What am I doing, then, gorgeous?" He was so secure, so confident, that it was impossible not to let him do whatever his heart desired to me. I trusted him with my whole being, even as his grip around my thighs started to make them ache. My lower lip quivered; "Lo--"
No, no!
"Love this," My rambling needed to end, stat.
Roman smirked into the kiss that followed; "Me too," He seemed to be catching onto my overstimulated state, and the second I let out a sigh of relief when he let go of my thighs and the pounding against my sweet spot relented, he came right back with a move I didn't expect. Roman wrapped his arms around me, pulling me up into his lap with his cock still throbbing inside me.
I suppressed a surprised yelp. "Rome!--"
"Shh," He guided my legs around him as he watched me adjust to the new feeling-- he was deeper than ever, now, and it freaked me out a bit. "Stay quiet for me, okay?"
I was on the brink of tears. It felt like my thoughts had short-circuited and left me for dead. My breath tensed in my chest as I draped my arms around Roman's neck, grabbing a fistful of his hair to ground myself, just as I knew he liked it. "Let's try something new," he purred, hands traveling up my thighs to grab my hips, lifting me up along his shaft as I gasped into his open mouth.
Even when I was on top, Roman needed to have control. Perfect. That worked out well for me, actually.
The way he was looking at me made me feel like I was on fire. The green of his eyes etched into mine, watching me with unmatched amusement-- his lips were upturned into the usual smug smirk which made my heart dance in my chest, and in vulnerable moments such as these, it also resulted in my cheeks flaring up with an embarrassing shade of pink.
It didn't take long before we found a rhythm, and before I got used to practically riding him. It was different like this, especially when Roman's hands were simply a weight on my hips, and I could fuck myself on his cock. It felt like a permission of sorts, like he was telling me he was all mine, that I could do whatever he wanted to him-- like an exchange of submission. Although, of course, Roman would never fully submit to anything in the world.
It was easy to keep quiet when the soft pillows of his lips muffled the sounds of my inevitable moans, but when they left me, it became a fight against my conscience. A small gasp would escape me here and there, along with a loud hitch of my breath, and it eventually balled on into a breathy string of ah ah ah's-- staying quiet was an impossible task. I prayed to all the Gods above that my parents wouldn't hear the mess their dearest Roman was making out of their daughter.
They had no idea he could be like this. None. He was such a sweetheart at dinner, he'd always make sure to help my mom set the table, and he'd talk sports with my dad-- they had no idea. I could see it in Roman's eyes that he found the sight of me beyond amusing. That he got off me unraveling more than anything. He only made it harder for me to stay quiet as he pressed the heel of his palm to my clit, keeping me steady with a hand on my back as his kisses trailed down my body.
"A-Ah, Rome--" I was done for. I was done for.
"Shh, just a little more," Roman's lips had stayed at my clavicle for long enough to leave a mark. It dawned on me that he was leaving a trail of hickeys, and my fist in his hair tightened as my legs quivered. This was too many sensations at once. "A little more... You can take it, right?"
I couldn't utter a cohesive sentence. The pressure on my clit, his wet, eager kisses, and the way I could set the perfect pace as I slid up and down his cock made my brain buzz with static noise. I was sure my eyes had morphed into the shape of hearts as I let out a shaky, quiet moan, filling myself up with Roman's cock over and over. The best feeling in the world.
"That's my girl..." he cooed, grabbing my waist with his free hand. "Fuck yourself on my cock, it's all yours..." His pink lips parted with pleasure as he watched me sink down on his length, enchanted by the sight. It was a delight to watch the way his perfect up-do came undone, and the way his hair fell over his forehead in messy strokes. He looked unreal, godly.
Roman's words were enough to make my hips buck into his abdomen, but my state only got worse, deteriorated, as his mouth trailed down to my breast. The moan I had to suppress when I felt his tongue against my stiffening bud was unmatched-- I was sure I started panting as he took it into his mouth, suckling it swollen as I whimpered.
I wanted to let it spill past my lips; I love you, I love you, I love you. In that sense, sex was dangerous territory for me. However, how was I supposed to resist when it felt this good?
My lips ghosted over the parts of him I could reach, his ear, his cheek, and I let my breath hitch against his skin as a familiar feeling pooled in my tummy. Aware, Roman only drove the heel of his palm harder into my clit, making it so that I was grinding up against him with every lift of my hips against his length. I gave into a tremble, unsure how to stabilize myself in this position-- "Rome," I cried, pleading for him to kiss me. I wasn't sure I'd be able to suppress the sounds that were threatening to spill past my quivering lips when my high washed over me.
Roman's free hand remained at my breast, pinching my bud between his pointer and his thumb in a firm hold which had me wincing in pleasure. He kissed up my body, my shoulders, my neck, my jaw, my cheek-- yet he hovered inches away from my lips, the smirk still prevalent. "You lost," he whispered.
Lost what?
It was as though he read my mind; "You can't stay quiet, can you?"
I really wished I could. I was trying with all my might. But I was so, so damn close, and I shook my head, hoping he'd take pity on me.
"It's okay," he cooed, his breath falling hot against my cheek as he tilted his head as though to kiss me. "You were never meant to win."
And so I crumbled. Completely. Utterly. Euphoria tore through me as I fell apart in Roman's arms, and it didn't take long before he simply wrapped his arms around me, laid me back down, and fucked me through my high as I suppressed my sobs of pleasure into his shoulder.
Honestly? I didn't remember what happened next. Completely zen, relaxed, and thoroughly fucked, I considered myself logged off for the next ten minutes or so. However, I had to run over to my mental keyboard as Roman's hand, which was previously toying with my hair, pointed to my nightstand-- "What's that?"
With a small grunt, I raised my head from his bare shoulder. Fuck. My eyes sprung wide open as I spotted The Avoidable Vampirism on display, uncovered and everything. "Uh..." How could I have left that abomination out in the open? I gulped, turning to Roman with a doe-eyed expression that I knew worked well on him. I was sure my next words would put him off his incoming queries in an instant; "It's the sequel to Twilight. Vampire erotica, the usual. Edward is gay in this book, Bella is dead, and there are tons of scenes where, uh... men kiss men. And suck each other off. Super interesting."
Unsurprisingly, Roman was immediately disinterested. "Girls," he mumbled, rolling his eyes before he pressed a short kiss to my lips. "Stop thinking about gay sex, go to sleep."
"I'm not thinking about!--"
"Sleep!"
a/n: thank you for reading this monster of a chapter!!!! as you see, Roman's going absolutely nuts... I wonder whyyy (oh we know why, don't we? don't dangle a carrot in front of a donkey or whatever they say). there are a few chapters left of this book which will be packed w shit I hope will melt your brains, but before that, I wish you all a lovely christmas and a happy new year!!! MWAH, THANK YOU!!)
here are all the chapters!!<3: PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12
loveliest taglist of all time:
@mentallyscreamingsincebirth @putherup @corawithfanfiction @vladsgirlxx
@iamaslytherin0 @sexualparkour @the-universe-is-complicated @heavenly-bratt
@lafemme-nk @namiusedbubble @useyourwandbro @strmborns @literally-lani
@virgosapphire79 @star-girl-04 @veyzus @ddipotassium @pecxiebu
@mil88691 @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @katifefe @sn0wybowie-blog
@lilithskywalker @likecherriesinthespring @sadheartjellyfish @vadersangel
@shehangsbrightly @burningmiraclekingdom @dollforaswan @austinswhitewolf
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#roman godfrey#hemlock grove#roman godfrey x reader#x reader#bill skarsgård#fanfiction#oneshot#bill skarsgard#fluff#angst#fanfic#highschool!au#hemlock grove fanfiction#aRGH ROMAN IS SUCH A GREY CHARACTER#IDK WHAT TO DO W HIM#DADDY I LOVE HIM#TO BITSSSS#BUT ARGHHHHHHHHH IDIOT!!#POOR READER:(#WHY IS SHE SO BRAINWASHED#KICK HIM OUTTTT WDYM U DO THE DIRTY W HIM AFTERWARDS#IDIOTS#I LOVE THEM
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Veiled Emotions | Lando Norris
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Part 1 | (Part 2)
Pairings: Lando Norris x BFF!Female Reader
Word Count: 2.8K
Warnings: Sexual tension | Slow Burn
A/N: Hello my lovelies. Apologies for the delay, I had a busy week and it was my birthday, so consider this a gift from me to you guys. I got a bit carried away, so I hope you loves enjoy .xx
(Y/F/N) - Your Friend’s Name
It was the next morning, and thankfully (Y/F/N) let me sleep in, and didn’t bother me to wake up early. I woke up in a pretty good mood until I turned to the side table and looked at my lockscreen to see I was flooded with message notifications from Lando, as well as a number of DMs reacting to my story last night.
I opened Lando’s messages first - it was just good morning texts and a spam of him saying my name to wake me up. However his last message said ‘(Y/N/N) I’m coming home later today. Are you busy today ? Call me when you see this ❤️’. Hmm I wonder what it’s about…
Before replying back I went through a few of my Instagram DMs. Some asking if it’s Lando, others asking for a better soft launch, though one DM caught my eye from João, the last person I would ever expect a DM from.
João
Hey beautiful… I know this seems crazy but would love to get to know you better. How about tonight after my match ?
Y/N
Hii ! We just started following each other… eager to see me already ? lol just playing. Sure ☺️
João
Was not expecting that to work 😂 but I’m glad it did. Are you free to come to my match at 6 ? Its at Wembley 👀
I yelled for (Y/F/N) and luckily she was in the kitchen which isn’t far from my room, “Girl something major just happened!” I said as I sat up against the headboard. “Omg is it Lando ?” She asked as she jumped in the bed beside me. “Yes and no, well not right now. So you wouldn’t believe this but João just DMed me asking if-“
“Babe slow it down and reverse. Did you just say João DMed you ? AND YOU ARE THROWING THAT OUT SO CASUALLY ?” She screamed in shock. “Erm okay sorry I guess for not making it a big deal ? Anywho, he wants to go out to tonight after-“ “YES !” She cut me off. “I didn’t finish my sentence” I huffed. “I don’t care, you’re going to whatever he invited you for” she smiled. “Well he first said to meet after his match, and now he’s inviting me to his match as well” I held my head in my hands. “I wish I had your kind of problems. A footballer and a f1 driver fighting for you ? The potential chance you have of being a football or f1 wag is crazy !” she squealed as she clapped her hands.
“I take it that I say yes to both ?” I raised a brow. “Absolutely !” She said in an obvious tone.“But I don’t know how I feel about going. I mean this is all literally happening bc his ex is dating my Lando” I sighed. “My ?” She teased with a smirk. “Oh my god what am I even saying” I said in shock as I shook my head. “This boy is making me lose my mind” I groaned in frustration.
“Okay jokes aside..I understand where you’re coming from. We don’t know what his intentions are and I get that you may feel uncomfortable. Why don’t you ask him if a friend can come with for the match so you have company” she suggested. “I can’t tell if you’re being helpful or if this is an excuse to come with me to a football match” I furrowed my brows. “Well mainly the first one but I won’t deny the second one” she pursed her lips. “I see how it is, oh well either way I’m not planning to go to this match alone. I’m just going to ask him if you can come with” I said as I opened the DM once again.
Y/N
I’ve never been, so it sounds like fun, do you mind if I bring a friend with ? 😊
João
Don’t mind at all. Whatever you say 😉 Will send you a pass and details in a few for the 2 of you. Look forward to seeing you.
Y/N
Perfect ! Thank you so much. See you later 🥰
“Okay done !” I smiled as I closed the app. “Great, now what about Lando ?” She asked curiously. “Oh yeah..about him-“ I started to laugh nervously. “Oh no. What now ?” She crossed her arms over. “So uhm, he’s coming back home today and well, he asked me to call him when I saw his message” I shrugged casually. “Did you call him ?” She raised a brow. “No ?” I furrowed my brows. “Well what the heck are you waiting for ! Call him right now because I wanna hear this” she yelled. “Okay fine jeez” I scrolled for his name and ringed him.
I cleared my throat whilst it was ringing, “Hey you’re finally up” he greeted. “Yeah I just saw your message. What’s up ?” my gaze lingered to (Y/F/N). “Well I’m flying back in a few hours..thought we should meet up, that’s if you’re free” he said hopeful. “Why does he sound shy ?” (Y/F/N) whispered. “Shh- Uhm yeah unfortunately I’m busy today Lan, maybe tomorrow ?” I pressed my lips together. “Oh I see..what are your plans ?” He asked. “Well João wanted me at his match today, and we’re going out after, so I have no idea what time I’ll be back.”
“Hmm wow…I take it that you’re going for the Euros then ?” He asked. “Yepp that’s right” I replied. “Great, then I’ll see you later. Bye !” His tone changed. “Byeee” I said lastly as I ended the call. “Did you hear correctly ?” (Y/F/N) asked confused. “What ?” I asked even more baffled than she is. “He said he’ll see you later” she said. “Ohh, well maybe he means before we leave for the match” I suggested. “Oh yeah you got a point” she dropped the subject as our focus was on having brunch.
After brunch and trying to kill some time, I had a shower and started to hunt for an outfit. Thank god for (Y/F/N) as she helped me narrow down my options. The look we’re going for is I’m an up-and-coming wag, but I’m mainly just a friend.
As we were about to leave, I failed to mention that João sent a driver to escort us to the stadium. Nice touch. (Y/F/N) squealed and pinched me when she saw the car. “Girlll you can have Lando, I’ll take him” I stifled a laugh and tried to hush her before the driver heard us.
Upon our arrival at the stadium, we were then escorted by a team member named, Anna. She was really sweet, as she took her time to give us a tour. I was not expecting her to actually take us to the dressing rooms where I was tapped on the shoulder by João. “Hello” he said softly. “Hi omg we finally meet” I smiled as we then exchanged a hug. “About time” he nervously chuckled. “Yeah thank you again for inviting us” (Y/F/N) butted in as she started taking to him.
“Well thank you for accepting my invite. I hope you guys enjoy the match, and you’ll be cheering me on” he winked. “Of course !” (Y/F/N) smiled at him. “Sorry to leave so suddenly, I have a team meeting. See you later yeah ?” He said as he started walking backwards. “Yepp” “Goodluck for today’s match” (Y/F/N) added. He waved us off before he finally left. I gave her a side eye before Anna guided us to our seats and bid goodbye.
The stadium was full to capacity at this point, however, the match was only about to start in 15 minutes. I thought the view from the box would be a great time to post, but yet again, the fans beat me to it.
f1gossipgirl just added to their story
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“I swear this girl doesn’t rest” I giggled as I liked the stories. “You look insane, bestie” (Y/F/N) said as she looked over my shoulder. As I continued to go through the stories, my jaw dropped at the caption.
f1gossipgirl just added to their story
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“Ain’t no frikken way” I said in shock. “Bitch what the hell. Where is he ?” (Y/F/N) started to frantically look around us. As if on queue, the camera pans to Lando, and his face appears on the big screen. “Oh. My. God” we said simultaneously. “Call him right now” I huffed. “Is that a good idea though ?” Before she could reply, she grabbed my phone and dialled his number. “Are you insane ?” I said as she then shoved my phone to my ear. “Hey love” he answered.
“Hey you…so like when did you plan on telling me you’re here as well ?” I know him so well that I could tell he’s smiling on the other side, he’s enjoying this a little too much. “Well, I did tell you that I’ll see you later” he half laughed. “Are you stalking me ?” I asked playfully. “No” he scoffed. “Defensive… so you are stalking me” I giggled. “No no I mean I was actually invited, in fact I was going to bring you with me but someone beat me to it” he huffed. “Hmm okay keep telling yourself that” I smiled.
“Where are you anyway ? Why don’t you come here and give me company ?” He suggested. “I’m with (Y/F/N), I can’t leave her alone” she then shoved my shoulder. “I’m not a child, you can leave me alone !” she said lowly. “That’s fine, she can take the seat and you can sit on my lap.” Is he flirting with me ? I guess so considering how (Y/F/N) started giggling. “Haha very funny. I don’t think your girlfriend would like that”
“Girlfriend ? Where did you hear this ?” He asked. “Okay just forget about it, I’ll see you later. Byeeee” I said as I ended the call.
The match ended at 93 minutes with the score being 2-0 - Portugal had won, which is great but disappointing to see England lose.
(Y/F/N) and I stayed in place as everyone was leaving. “Can I escort you ladies to a private room so you can get comfortable until João is back ?” Anna suggested. “Yeah sure” (Y/F/N) replied. I followed behind their lead whilst I scrolled through my phone. “Avoiding me, love.” I looked up and I was met by Lando. “Oh hey you” I smiled. “Where are you off to ?” He eagerly asked. “Well, I’m following (Y/F/N) and Anna, she’s escorting us to a private room until João is done, but I’ll see you around” I quickly gave him a smile as I tried to walk past him. He grabbed my hand and pulled me back.
“Wait. I feel like I don’t see you anymore these days” he pouted. “I could say the same for you. You’re in a relationship and now well so am I” I lied as I attempted again to walk past him. He yet again successfully pulls me back. “Can we just talk…alone and clear some things… please” he asked sincerely. I glanced over to (Y/F/N) and she nodded towards Lando, hinting I should go with him. “Okay fine.” I walked over to hug (Y/F/N), “Don’t worry I’ll cover for you” she whispered. “Thanks, I owe you” I said back softly. “Anna, thank you for helping this evening. If you’ll excuse me, I unfortunately have to go, but (Y/F/N) is here to accompany João” I smiled at her. She nodded with a smile.
I walked back over to Lando, “After you” he smirked as he stood aside for me to walk ahead. Once we were at the parking, he walked ahead of me to his McLaren as he opened the passenger door for me. “Have I told you how beautiful you look today ?” He asked as he leaned against the door. “No, but thank you” I gave him a small smile as he sat in the driver's seat.
“So I think let’s clear the air on the topic that seems to bother you” he said as he tried to hide his smile. “I’m sorry but it doesn’t bother me” I scoffed. “By saying it doesn’t bother you, means it bothers you” he smirked. “I think what bothers you is that I was invited to this match by João and I was supposed to be on a date with him after, so you followed me here to ruin my plans” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Yet here you are, in my car. With me” he continued to smirk. “I only came here to ‘clear the air’ like you asked” I raised my voice.
“I love to see you get angry” he said as he leaned more into his seat to face me. The sexual tension in the car really got me flustered. “Lando, this is not funny ! Get to the point already, or I’m leaving” I huffed. “Okay okay sorry… so…are you actually dating him ?” he asked. “Are you serious right now ? You called me for this ? Are you trying to get information again for your girlfriend ?”
“Again with the girlfriend story” he laughed. “What is so damn funny ? Share the joke so I too can laugh” I rolled my eyes. “She’s not my girlfriend” he held in his laugh. “Wait what” I could feel the heat rush to my cheeks. “But I swear everyone and their mothers said that you’re dating her ? I felt like such an idiot being your so-called best friend because everyone knew this except for me” I argued. “Well sorry to break it you like this but you fell for the rumours like everyone else”
“But she went on this trip with you guys and-“ he cut me off. “Yeah because she’s friends with Pietra and besides that, I asked you to come with but you said no” he pouted. “Because like I told you, I didn’t want to be a third wheel” I sighed. “You wouldn’t have been a third wheel because you have me. If anything, she was going to feel like a third wheel because I’m closer to you… I was really hoping you were coming because I was so lonely, that’s why I video called you last night, but then you thought something else and cut the call on me” he called me out.
“I mean can you blame me with everything I’ve been hearing ?” I scoffed. “Now that that’s out of the way. Are you dating him ?” He asked as he leaned on the console between us. “What’s it to you ?” I grinned. “Oh come on, I answered your question, the least you can do is answer mine” he pouted again with the puppy dog eyes. “I guess you can say it’s a yes and no answer” I said playfully. He tilted his head to the side, “It’s either a yes or no” he said as he leaned closer towards me.
It started to feel really hot with all this sexual tension. I could feel the moisture and tiny beads of sweat start to form along my collarbones and my cleavage. It’s as if (Y/F/N) confident spirit took over me when I answered his question. “Well, yes I’m dating him if it means it bothers you and no, I’m not dating him..unless, you’re interested” I smirked as I tilted my head. He sniggered as he broke eye contact for a second before meeting my eyes again. He grabbed my cap and put it on himself backwards. “What are you doing ?” I furrowed my brows. “Something I should’ve done a very long time ago” he said as he entangled his fingers into my hair and closed the gap between us.
Our lips met in a rush of warmth, a collision of uncertainty and desire. The kiss was both sweet and fierce, a moment that felt like it could unravel everything we’d been avoiding. My hands wrapped around his neck and trailed into his hair, lightly pulling on it. When we finally pulled away, breathless, I found myself searching his eyes.
He bit his lip as he pressed his forehead against mine. “Wow” I said, my voice shaky. He chuckled softly, a smile spreading across his face. “Yeah, wow…always wanted to do that.”
I wasn’t done messing with him. “Then why didn’t you ? Oh right, you were so busy hitting on your ‘girlfriend’ that-“ he cut me off by capturing my lips in another kiss. He broke away to look at me, “You know you drive me insane sometimes, but it shows how much I love you when I can’t stop thinking about you or when I randomly smile at something you said” he blushed. “You already love me ?” I teased him. “Yes. Yes I do” he said as he gave me a quick peck. “Okay” I smiled. “Don’t you love me too ?” He pouted. “I’m still thinking about it” I pursed my lips.
“What is there to think about ?” He asked in shock. “I think I’m gonna need a little bit more of your lips on mine to decide-“ I tried to hide my laugh as he then cupped my face with his hands. “Is. This. Good. Enough. For. You” he pecked my lips after each word. I giggled at him being silly, “Okay okay, I love you too.” “Damn right you do” murmured as his hand moved to my neck and placed his lips on mine once again.
#f1 oneshots#f1 x reader#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris oneshot#lando norris imagines#lando norris fluff#lando norris angst#lando norris smut#f1 imagines#formula 1 x reader
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Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 5 part 4
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])
(this is a sad one, apologies in advance)
agatha just had the unimaginably traumatic experience of her mother's evil ghost possessing her body, so of course she cracks jokes. she's shaking like a leaf, but hey, coping mechanism gotta cope!
when evanora tried to execute agatha, stealing secrets or whatever was only an excuse, she was punishing her daughter for the sin of being born. whatever she says, her so called worry for these other witches is also an excuse. she's simply furious that someone has begun to think of agatha as a person rather than a monster. it's once again a selfless VS selfish paradox, evanora is always framing her actions as selfless and for the greater good, but her hatred for agatha is undeniably raw and personal. I would love to learn what evanora's life was like, who were her parents? what turned her into such a hateful mother?
(look at how angry rio already is. and alice always protecting the person closest to her by default.)
this is the ultimate humiliation for agatha, someone who has always kept her past and struggles so close to the chest. now one of her deepest traumas is laid bare for everyone to see and judge. she's always trying to come off as strong and unfeeling and formidable, but here she is, a sad little girl abused by her own mother.
btw I see you all have strong feelings about ghosts and billy's powers! lol I got so many comments. I see you, I see you! Granted I'm not actually super invested in my ghost theories, this being a made up marvel show and all, but here's what I think:
agatha says to wanda, "you have no idea how dangerous you are, you're supposed to be a myth, a being capable of spontaneous creation, and here you are, using it to make breakfast for dinner!" agatha, one of the most powerful witches ever existed, could not create food for nicky. like, the scope of wanda's powers (and billy's by extension) is the kind of scary that can reshape reality itself and truly and properly fuck up the Sacred Balance or whatever rio calls it.
when I say billy created a ghost evanora, yes it's a copy but in the same way a Star Trek transporter makes a copy, you know what I mean? whether the orignal stays behind or not, billy's evanora is the real evanora. and if you believe in souls, that gets even more complicated! did billy take evanora's soul from the afterlife and plopped her in here, or did it copy it too? and was wanda actually able to create billy's and tommy's or did she catch the wandering soul of stillborn twins?
see I don't think evanora was a ghost prior to this (again, I might be proven wrong in the future, but this is where I'm at right now). if that were the case, you know she'd been haunting agatha's ass, wouldn't have given her a moment of peace. maybe rio took extra care to send her to the afterlife, idk. now rio looks shocked and angry to see evanora, like this is a new development.
rio's voice is literally roaring with anger
like i cannot overstate how much rio hates and despises evanora for what she did to agatha
evanora zeroes in on rio, approaches. rio takes a whole step back and makes herself smaller. she's nervous. she says that ghosts are cheaters, but it goes beyond that, doesn't it? rio understands life and death, but a ghost is neither, or both. it goes beyond all her control and expertise, and for the first time since we've known her, she's at a disadvantage. ironic, isn't it, considering what happens to agatha in the finale?
agatha, who's been cowering in a corner, chooses this moment to approach. does she want to protect rio and billy and the others? or is she so desperate for an ounce of love and affection from her mother that she, coward as she is, actually wants to put herself in arm's way?
while everyone is focused on agatha, alice looks at rio. she is putting together evanora's words, agatha's terror and rio's hatred. jen is being selfish. alice, generous alice, could never be selfish
the last time agatha saw her mother she was still a kid. now she is a mother herself and the mere thought of not loving, not wanting to protect your child, of actually going out of your way to harm them? it's simply inconceivable to her.
the shock. the tears forming in her eyes. the same heartbreak she felt when she realized her mom was about to kill her at the stake. she's feeling small and wretched and unloved like only a parent can make you feel
it's the matter-of-fact tone she uses. it's worse than hatred. she despises agatha beyond hatred
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there is a moment in a child's life when they see a parent clearly for the first time, their weakness and their flaws. this is especially true for an abused child, it comes a day when you realize that despite being called bad and evil and blamed for the pain happening, it was never really your fault. agatha knows what a parent's love should look like now. and this is not it.
rio visibly deflates. she is the only person in the room agatha opened up with about her mother. there is nothing she can do to spare her pain now. she has no power against evanora
alice has a blinding moment of shock, realization, pity. she knows only too well what generational pain and trauma can do to a person. but she still had a mother who loved her. agatha didn't.
jen, who used to be a healer, can no longer feel compassion. jen has had to learn to protect herself above all others. because evanora hurt agatha, and agatha hurt jen in return.
and when it's all said and done, agatha will always beg. all her power, her brains, her experiences are nothing. she regress to that girl at the stake. I can be good. please.
alice, who's always been the first to jump to everyone's defense, who always puts others before herself. she has seen agatha bare and helpless, she has seen that raw core that agatha has always hidden and, in her final moments, she's accepted agatha in her coven. it's more instinct than rationality, but alice has always been a heart over head kinda girl. if she can see the harpy, if she can see the pain, by GOD she'll do something about it.
“The Knight of Wands.” full of fire, fights bravely.
lilia's gut-wrenching scream. she knows what is happening. agatha already told her.
a succubus who hasn't fed in so long. I keep thinking, there was never anybody who loved her enough to teach her control, to seek alternative solutions to satiate her hunger. rio never could, rio cannot interfere with who lives and who dies. but could a coven together have fed her? could a big coven have donated power little by little, and kept her safe and valued and protected? nurtured her in every way? or was she always doomed from the start? was evanora right, did alice sign her death warrant the moment she chose to love agatha? I know what my answer is to all that, but what do you guys think?
and another question for you: billy casts around desperately for help, nicky answers. was nicky, or rather a shadow of nicky, created by billy too? or was the son of Death powerful enough and scared enough to reach out on his own, maybe with just a little push on billy's part?
a name was all it took for agatha to pass her trial, and look how much was needed to get it out of her. only billy's chaos could do the impossible: drag agatha's ravaged and wrecked heart to the surface. billy only wanted to help her heal, but he's a just a boy with the power to shape the universe. it took evoking ghosts and dredging up horrible trauma to make all of agatha's defenses crumble and raw-beat her into admitting her pain, into maybe, if we're lucky, starting on the road to recovery. oh, billy. you don't know how to handle things gently yet, with your big man's hands and your young, too young soul.
she stops IMMEDIATELY. she didn't know how to control her hunger, until now. the monster was human all along
by. as in, by billy, because he did it all. and also, good-bye. good-bye, mama.
oh, alice. there are no words.
and now they're no longer just numbers, just fools she conned and killed and abandoned on the road. now it's the girl with the big luminous heart, who sang the Ballad with her, who shared her same pain, the first human being in agatha's life who wanted to selflessly help her.
there is a moment, in a child's life, when they see a parent clearly for the first time.
go to episode 5 part 5
#agatha all along#agatha deep dive#agatha harkness#alice wu gulliver#billy maximoff#rio vidal#jennifer kale#character analysis
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Damian Desmond: An Attachment Perspective
**Spoilers for SxF Chapter 106 Below**
I loved this chapter for so many reasons, but the one I really want to highlight today is that Damian may be insecurely attached, but he still has hope. And that he is so brave, in his own way.
Exhibit A: When Damian knocks on Demetrius' door and asks for help, I am 100% positive that Damian wasn't truly expecting a response from Demetrius. He's used to being ignored, especially by his own family.
But he tried anyway.
This is important, because most children of Damian's age who fall under the category of avoidant attachment wouldn't approach a situation like this where there is a possibility that they would be rejected. It speaks volumes to me that Damian has a sense that he would be turned away, but still he tries.
"I was hoping..."
Exhibit B: There is also this moment where we see that Damian wanted to say something, and then he silences himself before he can say anything.
(Don't cry, Lass, omg dont cry 😭😭😭 )
Damian is initially afraid, so he silences himself, but then there is this moment, where he pulls himself together, and tries again.
Endo is so brilliant at drawing out moments of important decisions for characters. You can see Damian making the decision to say something, and gather his courage, but he only falls short once he actually succeeds at getting Donovan's attention.
Under the heavy gaze of the head of the Desmond dynasty, I'm not surprised that 6-year old Damian felt his resolve crumble.
But!
He reverts to another option: find support. Which leads me to...
Exhibit C: This one makes me sob, actually. In response to his wavering confidence, Damian looks to his mother for support. The woman who should be his primary caregiver, and therefore his primary attachment figure.
And she turns away.
(Tears, tears down my face, my boy doesn't deserve this 😭 )
This is the third moment in this chapter alone that Damian does something that no other Desmond would dare: he seeks connection.
Damian tried to connect with his brother, his father, and his mother, all in the same chapter. He is the sole character that links them all.
All through Chapter 106, these are the moments that stood out to me the most, because it truly shows to me that Damian still has hope. Demetrius and Melinda are very clearly ingrained in their roles, and their behaviour is crystallised into what we see as the reader. It's obvious that this isn't the first time that Demetrius has rebuffed Damian's requests; and this isn't the first time that Melinda has ignored Damian's emotional needs.
I hear you wondering: Does Damian still have hope because he's still just a child?
Maybe. It's certainly possible. But I also want to highlight that Damian is insecurely attached; specifically showing an insecure-avoidant attachment style.
Children with this style of attachment typically experience high levels of emotional neglect, where their primary caregiver consistently does not meet their emotional needs. This leads the child to value independence, autonomy, and self-reliance, and to generally see others as untrustworthy.
We see this in Damian. He believes he is better, usually weaponising the Desmond name to place himself above others, but there is also an element where he believes he is better, because he ranks highly in the social hierarchy, and he achieves brilliant grades on his own merit, demonstrating his own self-reliance.
(Side note: Issues stemming from an avoidant attachment style can still coexist with self-esteem issues, but I'm trying not to complicate this post lol).
My point: Damian has experienced enough rejection in his childhood that he shouldn't even be trying with his own family anymore. But he does. He keeps trying. Damian still hopes that he can connect with his family, and I think that this is because this is a part of his actual personality.
On the inside, Damian is complex; he struggles with the weight of his identity, he is trying to find his place in the world, he yearns for attention and validation (specifically from his father), he finds comfort in believing that he is better than other people (even his friends), he struggles to handle big emotions, he prefers to work things through independently, and struggles to be vulnerable and ask for help, and he lies to himself about his big feelings so that he can avoid feeling them.
And my favourite thing about him: he still keeps trying. He gathers his courage. He gets back up. Time and time again he feels afraid, and time and time again he feels the fear and he tries anyway.
Damian is so brave, in his own way.
#help i've dissolved into tears#i love my baby boy so much#he really doesn't deserve this#he deserves so much joy#please can someone hug this child#damian desmond#spy x family analysis#spy x family#sxf#spy x family manga#spy x family spoilers#avoidant attachment#attachment theory#attachment
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Hiiiii
I really like your blog (especially chan’s fics)
BUT, as much as I love channie, I’m currently in a total Han brain rot so I was wondering if you could write something like “his good girl, always” or “safe word” with a dom jealous/possessive Jisung x fem!reader
if you’re comfortable doing it OF COURSE
Anyway have a good dayyy 😙
only i can touch you here
pairing: jealous/possessive/soft dom!han x fem reader
genre: smut
word count: 3 screen shots and ~2.3k words
warnings: mentions of enhypens jungwon and sunoo, jealousy, marking, oral (f.receiving), implied subspace, smacking
an: anon, you’ve waited like 6 months for this. and i have no excuses for myself. but.. good things come to those who wait? at least i hope it’s good? listen.. im doing my best. i’m just a girl. lol i hope you’re still around to read this. <3 also, we’ve got mr minho’s birthday coming up and i have noooo idea what to write for him. i have some requests for minsung but i want something that’s just minho. so if you have any ideas.. send them my way pls. <3
masterlist
anon mentioned: his good girl always and safe word
‼ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⚠︎ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ‼ adults only • mdni ‼ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⚠︎ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ‼
the sound of the lock mechanism on your front door whirring pulled you out of your focus. you glanced up to see a tired looking han shuffle though the door. the couple seconds your eyes weren’t on the screen was enough for sunoo to pass you and cross the finish line, winning the race. he cheered and jungwon and yourself threw your controllers down in defeat.
“hi hannie.” you said, smiling up at him from the couch. he toed his shoes off before crossing the apartment toward you. he noticed how closely jungwon was sitting next to you. his knee was touching yours. han thought there was plenty of room on the couch. there was no need for him to be so close. han came around the back of the couch and put his hands on your shoulders. you tilted your head back to look up at him, his face upside down from your view.
“hey there, princess.” he leaned down and planted a gentle kiss on your lips. your skin was warm with the pet name and the show of affection while other people were in the room. han pulled his lips away from yours with a smile and turned his attention to jungwon.
“how’s the game going?” han sat on the back of the couch, his hands still on your shoulders, massaging gently.
jungwon looked a little flustered. “uh. good.” he said. “sunoo keeps winning though.”
“well i knew this one wasn’t winning.” han poked your cheek with his finger. “she’s not very good and mario kart. though it’s adorable watching her try so hard.”
“hey im getting better!” you argued. “i almost won that one!” you pointed at the tv.
the fond smile on jungwons face at your words didn’t go unnoticed by han. and it frustrated him. he hated being this way, knew he shouldn’t be jealous. he was very comfortable in his relationship with you. he trusted you fully and didn’t believe you would ever leave him for jungwon. but han couldn’t help the feeling of anger that bubbled up inside of him.
though he took small comfort in the fact that jungwon could never please you the way he does. and maybe he would just have to remind you of that.
“we should actually get going.” jungwon said, standing up. “we’ve got an early recording session.”
“thanks for having us over.” sunoo smiled. “it was fun.”
you wiggled your way out of han’s harsh grip and stood, walking them to the door. “it was so much fun. we will have to do it again sometime. maybe i can invite felix over next time. he would actually pose a challenge to sunoo.” you giggled.
“yeah that sounds great.” jungwon smiled. he opened his arms and you hugged him. han’s grip tightened on the couch, his jaw clenched, but he remained quiet. the hug lasted a little too long, han thought. with jungwon’s hand rubbing up and down your back before he pulled away. the hug goodbye to sunoo was much shorter. not even a real hug, just a side hug. and then the door was clicking shut behind them, plunging the apartment into silence.
han stood and approached you. he brushed your hair out of your face as you looked up at him, a smile on your lips, excited to see him.
“i missed you, baby.” he said.
you wrapped your arms around his waist, pulling him in and burying your face in his chest. “missed you.” you mumbled, voice muffled by his shirt.
��i’m glad they’re gone. i’m not sure how much more i could have handled.” your cheek vibrated with the vibrato of his voice radiating through his chest. “the hug almost pushed me over the edge.”
“we’re just friends though.” you said, looking up at him.
“i know you are, baby. i just get a little antsy when another man has his hands on you.” he cupped your cheek in his hand before leaning down and kissing you gently. “you’re my little baby. jungwon needs to keep his hands to himself.”
you couldn’t deny the pulsing you felt in between your legs. you were unsure if it was the kiss, or his words, or a combination of both.
“but it makes me feel better when i think about how he could never make you cum the way that i make you cum.”
you shoved your face back into his shirt, embarrassed.
“isn’t that right, baby?”
“hannie..” you groaned.
“do you need me to remind you?” he gently pushed you away from him, forcing you to meet his eyes. “do you need a reminder of why you’re mine?”
you shook your head no. “i don’t need a reminder. i know he could never compare to you.”
“do you?” he asked, taking a step closer to you. you took a step back, the look on his face letting you know he was going to remind you anyway. he strode forward as you hesitantly stepped back. like a cat cornering a mouse. “if you don’t need a reminder, then why do you let him touch you like that?” you were walking backwards through the bedroom door now, his intense stare never wavering.
“like what, hannie?” your voice came out smaller than you intended.
“he sits so close to you that his leg was against yours.” he says. “his hug lingered way longer than sunoo’s. and that’s just what happened while i was here.”
the back of your legs hit the bed frame and you had nowhere left to run to. he had you caged in. “it’s almost as if you like it when he touches you.”
“i don’t. i pr-promise.” you stuttered. “i o-only like it when you touch me.”
“oh poor baby.. tripping over your words.” he cooed. “do i make you nervous?”
you nodded. “a little bit..”
“there’s no reason to be nervous, little one.” he brushed his fingers over the skin of your neck and down to your collarbone. goosebumps bloomed on your arms and a shiver ran through you. “i’m just going to help you remember why i’m the only one who gets to touch you.”
he leaned down and captured your lips in a kiss. his lips soft on yours, a stark contrast to the way he was speaking.
his hands traveled under your shirt and held you by the waist. he pulled you closer, needing to feel your body against his. you could feel him, hard against you. he let his fingertips graze over your skin, causing you to squirm.
“my baby’s so ticklish.” you could feel his smile against your lips.
he made quick work of your shirt, tossing it somewhere behind him. and your bra followed soon after, joining the shirt on the floor. he kissed down your jaw and down your neck, sucking and biting little dark marks into your skin. marking you as his. you had your hands against his chest, your breathing shaky. a particularly hard bite from him caused you to yelp. “sorry baby.” he ran his tongue over the bite, soothing it. “everyone is going to know who you belong to.” he whispered against your skin.
he kissed his way down until he was kissing your shoulders, his fingers finding their way to your bare chest, running softly over your nipples. “lay back for me.” he said, pinching your nipple and tugging on it gently.
you did as he asked and climbed on the bed. flat on your back, head against the pillow, you looked down at him. he took off his shirt, tossing it in the growing pile, before climbing on the bed too. his mouth went straight to your breast, his tongue swirling. your fingers threaded through his hair, soft sounds of his name falling past your lips. he took his time, your nipples tingling and your pussy begging for stimulation. you rolled your hips up into him. his strong hand found your hip and pushed you back down.
“is there something you want, baby?” his breath felt cool against the damp skin of your breast.
“will you touch me, hannie? please?” you tried to roll your hips again but his hold was firm.
“you want me to touch you?” he teased. “didn’t jungwon touch you enough?”
he smirked against your skin, kissing his way down your tummy now. his fingers hooked your pants and your panties and pulled them off in one swift motion. he could see how wet you were, could see how badly you needed him and it made him ache. he palmed himself through his pants, his cock needing to be touched. but it would be a while before he could get to it. he planned to take his time with you. he just hoped he wouldn’t blow in his pants.
“i asked you a question, baby.”
he looked up at you, his body hovering over yours, not making any contact. you needed him but your brain was foggy. what had he asked you? you couldn’t remember.
“hannie..” you whined. “i don’t.. please.”
“are you getting all spacey on me already?” he kissed just below your belly button, your body arching into him, silently begging for him to please just touch you.
“i asked if our sweet jungwon had touched you enough.”
you shook your head no. “he didn’t.. would never let him..” you attempted to form a sentence.
han hummed in understanding. “he definitely had his hands on you baby. but he didn’t touch you… here.” he quickly touched your clit with the pad of his index finger before quickly pulling away. you gasped, your body jolting.
“did he, baby? no.. he could never touch you here.” he ran his fingers up through your slick, slowly circling around your clit. “as much as he may want to.”
he slowly sank two of his fingers into you, curling them slightly. “only i can touch you here.” he started pumping his fingers in and out, the sounds of your arousal reaching your ears.
you couldn’t control the string of syllables that came out of your mouth when he leaned down and wrapped his lips around your clit. thats when he started to loose control too. he always had trouble keeping a level head when he had his tongue on you. the taste of you drove him crazy and he really had to focus so he could finish his little lesson.
he could feel you squeezing around his fingers. and he pulled them out, much to your disappointment. but you weren’t empty for long. he used his hands to spread you wider, before sticking his tongue inside your hole as far as he could get it, licking your walls. he wanted to feel you squeeze his tongue, and you did. he groaned against you, drinking in as much of you as he could get. his own head was starting to get fuzzy, his whole body tingling. he focused on your face, your eyes scrunched tight, your bottom lip between your teeth, your skin flushed with color. god you are so beautiful. he would never get tired of this view.
“fuck— hannie…” you moaned, your fists grabbing at the sheets, then grabbing at his hair.
he slid his fingers back inside you, pumping faster. “are you gonna cum, baby?”
you nodded, your body tensing, your breathing becoming more difficult.
“who does this pussy belong to?” he asked.
you were rocking your hips in time with his fingers, chasing your high. you could feel it building, threatening to snap at any moment. he pulled his fingers out and slapped your pussy with his hand.
“answer me.” he snapped. he slipped his fingers back inside before asking again “who does this pussy belong to?”
you were trying hard to get your mouth to do what you wanted. your brain was screaming ‘it’s your pussy! yours!’ but your mouth couldn’t form the words.
he pulled his fingers out again, not satisfied with your silence. he pinched your poor little clit in between his fingers. “baby.. you’re not going to cum until you answer me.”
frustrated tears were leaking out of the corners of your eyes.
“i’ll ask one more time.” he slid his fingers back inside you, starting his motions again. you were clenching around him, teetering right on the edge of bliss. “who.. does this pussy.. belong to?” he timed his thrusts with his words. you were seeing stars already, your mind swimming in pleasure.
“y-y-you!” your voice cracked. “ s’your pussy hannie!” you cried. “please.. please.. it’s yours.. please.”
he loved seeing you like this. a total wreck and completely pliant in his hands. his life felt so out of his control most of the time, but this.. you.. you were completely under his control and he fucking loved it.
“that’s right baby.” he pumped faster. “you’re mine. i own this pussy.”
“yes!” you blindly agreed.
“cum for me. let my pussy cum.” he ordered. and before the sentence was even finished, you were coming apart under him. everything stopped. your body froze, your breathing stilled. but his fingers kept moving, and your body felt like it was moving as waves of pleasure washed over you. “there you go baby.. fuck.”
he leaned down and took your clit into his mouth briefly before running his tongue around his moving fingers, unable to help himself. he needed to taste you. you whined at the overstimulation.
you were coming down from your high, your body relaxing, your mind slowly returning to normal. he pulled his fingers out of you and licked them clean. he kissed back up your body until he reached your lips. you lazily kissed him back.
“only i can make you feel like this.” he muttered against your lips.
“i know.” your voice was hoarse. “you’re all i want.”
he kissed you slowly, pouring all of his love into it. you could taste yourself on his tongue. “i’m all you want?” he teased. “prove it.” he pushed his clothed erection into your thigh.
you moaned quietly, your body still recovering.
“come back to me, baby.” he rubbed his hand on your hip. “we’re not even close to done.”
♡ pls reblog if you liked it! it truly helps a lot and makes me smile :) ♡
©hyunjins-orange-slice-too i do not give permission for this work or any of my work to be translated, copied, or reposted.
#emmy answers#stray kids#stray kids x reader#stray kids imagines#han stray kids#han jisung texts#han jisung stray kids#stray kids han#stray kids han jisung#han jisung smut#han jisung x reader#han jisung#stray kids smut#skz han#skz imagines#skz smut#hyunjins orange slice too
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Yacht
Harry styles x actress!reader
Summary: Harry worries something is wrong during a family trip to Italy, turns out your just horny
Warning: sex to get pregnant lol
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e4d1a64c0a40e3c7d3d98ebbdf40a969/eab695d53569e629-3e/s540x810/e20db3661ddb19b0960f0a1a78ea9ad88661aeab.jpg)
Italy, it was always Italy.
As two high profile A-listers, Harry Styles and Y/n Y/L/N-Styles could never go anywhere without being caught. Once in the car, another in the street, and of course at concerts and premieres.
Vacation was another highly intense time for the couple, but it was only amped up to the max because of the Love on Tour's ending.
The night of the final show, Harry had his wife, mum, and sister in his dressing room. As the tour has lasted literal years, he figured he owed everyone some sort of gift: gift giving was his love language. He got the lovely couple of the band, Sarah and Mitch, and the little love-bug, a couple of odd-ball things he knew they would all like. He got similar items for the rest of the crew, personalizing them for the recipient.
His wife though, along with his mum and sister, he believed were owed some time with him. Call him selfish but Harry really did miss being with his family, and it was clear from the thousands of messages and voicemails that they all missed him deeply too. So he figured, why not Italy?
Italy is his go to place for relaxing, despite the constant paparazzi, it was quite peaceful when out in the water or in his shared home. Not only that, but his mother truly adores the country and the history; he feels he owes it to her for putting up with all of his shenanigans when he was younger, he knows he wasn't as easy as Gemma was, and stardom really did exacerbate it. But he's better now--Y/n has whipped him into shape--and he's wealthy enough to go to Italy as much as Anne wants.
Gemma just loves the opportunity to gossip with Y/n, along with the chance to sun bathe on the yacht. She was a simple person to please, and would be appreciative for a coffee and croissant.
Y/n, though, his love, isn't one that can be shown love to through gifts, at least expensive gifts. Her net worth is the same as his, but beside all of that, she is extermly picky about what she wants. All of her brithday gifts are something she specifically told Harry, from brand to color, nothing was left for interpretation.
He thought the vaction would be good though. Y/n likes the quality time between them, how they could just be themselves with nothing stopping them.
The yacht was a perfect hit though. Anne and Gemma both loved the salty breeze of the mederterain sea, but he didn't think it was enough for Y/n. He needed something that was more of a wow factor.
Harry was nervous, biting his nails as he took Y/n down to the docks for a midnight boat outing. He planned this a bit ago, but now was second guessing the whole ordeal.
"I love the smell of Italy." Harry said, holding his hand with his wife. "Something about it...just isn’t it perfect?"
"Is it the cigarette smoke?" Y/n joked, sneaking a quick peak at the corner of Harry's mouth. "Why are you taking me to the docks?"
Harry cleared his throat. "A midnight trip since I wanted some one on one time with you."
They had reached the docks by now, and were slowly getting on. He felt Y/n's hands get tighter around his hand, squeezing every now and then while the life guard was untying the rope connecting the yacht.
Harry looked over to his wife, watching her to make sure she was enjoying herself. She was looking beautiful, hair down while her face was pointed up, looking at the night sky's stars. Her outfit was loose, a simple dress that she threw on after showering to get the sea off of her. It was one he picked out long ago, around their 6 month anniversary, and it was still beautiful.
Her wedding ring completed the look though.
A beautiful antique ring, one that looked as though it was carefully preserved throughout history, looked ethereal on her.
"Hey H?"
Her voice was beautiful too. It was no kidding she was a movie star, her voice draws you in and cages you so you could never leave--not that Harry would want to.
"Yes, Love?"
"You're staring."
Harry blinked, not what he was hoping she would say. He hates to be called out.
"Just wanting to make sure you're happy." He shrugged. "I love you s'much, and I want to give you the perfect gift."
Y/n smiled, a warming one that made Harry's legs feel like jelly. She could never get over the love she felt from Harry, his passtion ratiating from him at all times was truly sickening to the loveless.
"Harry, I love this trip." She brushed her hand through his hair. "Everything you do makes me happy."
"But, earlier, on the yacht you seemed...off."
Y/n bit her lip, looking down to the sea beside them. She didn't mean for Harry to feel disappointed in himself, but she knew exactly what caused it.
"I just had a lot on my mind..." She said, not giving much up which Harry was not happy with.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
"I ran out of my birth control about a couple weeks ago, and my hormones are really messing with me." She said, hoping he would get the hint.
"So you're horny?" Harry laughed, a boy-ish grin forming on his face. "I can deal with that."
Y/n laughed and pushed his kissing face away from her neck. "Yes, but since I haven't been on birth control in a few weeks, my doctor thinks I could get pregnant."
Harry's jaw dropped, which then formed into another smile, this time one of excitement and hornieness. "So, you mean...we could start trying for a baby?"
Y/n just nodded. Harry put his hands on her face and kissed her. Her hands moved from his hair down his arms then under his shirt. Harry, bless his soul, was a little nervous to move his hand down, but when Y/n broke apart this kiss so she could strip out of her dress he had no problems.
Harry followed and took off the white shirt he was wearing before, alog with his pants. He got pushed down to a long cooler seat. Y/n strattled his hips and startedkissing him more. Harry started to trickle down to her neck, leaving a hicky closer to her boobs so no one could see. He loved the moans coming out of his love, the way he knew she was feeling good was getting himjust as turned on.
"You were horny." Harry snickered, getting back to work soon after. “Sitting on the yacht; you knew I’d fuck you if you asked.”
"I would've done something about it if my in laws weren't in the vicinity."
"My bad." Harry said, but it was half hearted as now he just really didn’t care.
The conversation didn't last long, soon enough Harry's boxers were off and Y/n bra and panties were somewhere else on the boat. "You sure? I got a condom somewhere."
"If I wasn't sure I wouldn't be off the pill." She reminded him. "What about you?"
"I've wanted a kid ever since you said 'I do'." They kissed, softly now, but Y/n soon sat on Harry's hard cock and they both moaned in ecstasy.
Harry was a little shocked to be honest, rarly they have sex without any foreplay or lube, and he doesn't think he's ever felt her so wet--he had to make sure not to cum too prematurely.
Y/n was focused on Harry and her breathing. Sex felt different now knowing they are activly trying for a child, she knows Harry's dick is the same, but something about it just made it better.
She begain to bounce, Harry's arms coming up to squeeze her boob while the other grabbed her ass. He positioned his legs and pushed up into her, again, again, and again. The repative motion was made all the diffference by one of his hands coming down to her clit to make her feelmore pleasure. She gapsed when he pintched her clit, mouth then forming a smile as he looked down to Harry's.
"Babe, I think-I think I'm gonna come." Harry groaned. "I wanna get you pregnant and it so fuckin' hot--come with me. Are you close?"
His voice was fast passed, he rushed through his words as he tried to hold off from coming. Y/n was feeling the same way though; the love, the passtion, and the idea of being pregnant was too much.
"Har, I'm about to." She groaned as Harry's hips shot up in a more paniced order. He felt crazy, moaning and looking just at her made him want to exploed. "Come with me."
Her voice trailed off and turned into a moan as Harry came inside her, no protection. It felt like heaven to the both of them, forgetting the sweat that clang to their bodies.
"I love you." Harry whispered. She was still on his dick, just collasped over him now, but she knew he said it out of love. Sex changed after marriage or after any new step within a marriage; after marriage was so loving, and they had a sense of understanding that truly could be sourced from empaths.
"I love you too." She whispered back. Giving one small kiss to his lips.
"If you get pregnant, I don't know how I'm going to top that gift." Harry jokingly sighed.
"Hm, you could give me another one." She chided. "I want a bunch of Styles babies."
"I'll love any amount of kids you want." Harry decided. "Even if its twenty."
She laughed. "No way am I going to carry twenty, maybe we'll just get some pets."
"What happened to a whole bunch?"
"Only if they're just like their daddy."
"Damn, I only wanted them if they're just like their mummy." Harry joked being distrought, groaing with faux aggrivation.
"Maybe they'll have the best of us."
"My beauty, and your personality." Harry joked, which Y/n didn't like so she jokingly shuved him. "Maybe not your personality."
#harry styles x reader#harry styles#harry styles smut#harry styles fluff#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x you#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles imagine#harry styles blurb#harry styles x fem!reader#harry styles fanfic#harry styles oneshot#harry styles x actress!yn#harry styles x famous!reader#harry edward styles#harry styles love on tour#dad!harry#dadrry
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Caught You Girl
Georgia Amoore x Fem!Reader
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synopsis: georgia fiercely defends what is hers
also hi new pfp 😝
a/n: sorry for not posting in 10 years lol… shoutout to my wifey @cosmopretty bc she helped me w this 🫶 also the pictures at the beginning are from her…. tbh this fic would not exist without her everyone say thank you! this is also so bad but it’s ok ❤️
Caught You Boy - Lana Del Rey (Unreleased)
warnings: mentions of sex, lots of swearing, that’s it i think but lmk if i missed anything!!
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c1159c84bf99f5b744a6d63f1c49ceac/0e9ecdb9acd26d1a-8f/s1280x1920/57f65a88c33928bbccd5b7d0b7249d0b9da043fb.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/872076ede97c05d2024b97e8eb9cfc4b/0e9ecdb9acd26d1a-5c/s640x960/43b1c313a751b44219f2328d53ec53accdb4b606.jpg)
@/georgiaamoore my girlfriend is hotter than you and smarter than you and just better tbh (anyways happy 6 months my sweet girl can’t believe we kept it hidden for this long)
y/n.l/n it’s sweet that you think so highly of me but i thought you knew… i’m straight…
georgiaamoore @y/n.l/n bloody hell spare me
kamoreaarnold SOOO WHEN WE GETTING YOUR GIRL ON THE LIVE
y/n.l/n @kamoreaarnold wait i’m important enough to be on a KK ARNOLD LIVE????
kamoreaarnold @y/n.l/n GIRL YES WTF??
user-1 OKAYYYY HARD LAUNCH 😍
user-2 WHO STOLE MY WIFE.
user-3 @/user-2 she’s @y/n.l/n and did you not read the caption? she’s better than you
user-4 let me in there 😫😫
user-5 OMG I’m so happy for y’all 🫶
nika.muhl I feel like a proud mother
You are definitely not famous, despite the ten thousand followers that appeared out of nowhere, but your girlfriend and your friends definitely are.
You’ve been sitting on the floor for a few minutes now, KK Arnold’s phone propped up on the low coffee table in front of you, staring in shock at the rising viewers and the comments that pour in faster than you can read some of them.
Your jaw actually drops a bit when the viewer count hits 300.
You’re not famous. You’re not good in the spotlight. You’re awkward and you stutter over your words, you can’t get it out of your head how many people are watching you and analyzing everything you do.
You’re the new girl. The new person to pick apart.
And even worse, you’re Georgia’s girlfriend. And if the fans didn’t know about her official 6 month post, they can definitely see now that you’re more than friends.
Georgia has her arm wrapped around your shoulders, tucking you into her side- allowing you to feel like you’re hiding away from at least some of the prying eyes as you play with her other hand in her lap.
Her fingers softly work out nonexistent knots at the ends of your hair, and the comforting sound of her and KK’s laughs makes you feel a little bit calmer. You don’t quite forget that all the eyes are there, but they dull.
Another one of the girls here appears over KK’s shoulder, talking to the live, so Georgia turns to you. She presses a kiss to your forehead, keeping her lips there while she whispers softly.
It’s nice not having to worry about keeping your relationship hidden. It’s not like you wanted a secret relationship, it was actually Georgia’s idea. She wanted to make sure you were comfortable and all-in before she introduced you to the world of social media fame.
The one thing that’s not a secret, that’s never really been a secret, is how protective Georgia is.
You joke that it must be something to do with her being Australian, although you don’t really have an idea where that comes from.
She posted a few pictures of you in them, but she never tagged you, and your face was always pretty much hidden- she even posted a picture of the sunset and blocked out your face with her hand, laughing the entire time she did so at how ridiculous it was.
Even though you both knew there was no way she was taking that picture without covering your face.
Georgia didn’t want you to get spooked by how overbearing the fans could be- and she admitted that she selfishly wanted to keep you to herself. But you kinda wanted everyone to know that you were hers and she was yours.
And Georgia was always down for that.
You were trying it. And Georgia was there, at least. And you know you never have to worry about anything when she’s there.
“You okay, princess?”
“I’m fine,” you mumble back, careful not to let your lips move too much so the camera can’t tell what you’re saying.
“Yeah?” She says, squeezing your shoulder, prodding gently.
“I’m good,” you reassure her, smiling. You still feel kinda awkward, and she notices the way you look away from her.
“Are you sure, baby? Because if you’re not comfortable then I’ll end it right now. Or we can just leave altogether. We can grab food, if you’re hungry. Or just go home and sleep.”
“Hey, babe?”
“Yeah?” Her eyes are wide and concerned, her entire focus is poured onto you. Her eyes rake over your body language, her thumb rubs soothing circles into your shoulder, and your hand is caressed softly by hers.
“Stop spiraling.”
She smiles, squinting at you. “Hah. You’re funny.”
“I know I am. Seriously, though, I’m fine. I’ll tell you when I want to leave, okay?”
She’ll drag you away from this live at the first inkling of you wanting to leave. And even if you want to stay, she might drag you away anyways if she’s decided she’s done sharing.
She blinks for a long second.
“Okay, yeah. But seriously, tell me. Even if-”
“Georgia.”
She presses a quick kiss to your cheek, but when that does nothing to lift your unimpressed frown, she kisses your lips.
“Sorry?”
You roll your eyes, looking away from her as she kisses your cheek yet again, this time letting her lips linger. She’s about to say something, you can tell- probably jokingly beg for forgiveness, but you can’t help but notice KK’s side eye in the camera.
“Yes, KK?” You ask with a smile.
She crosses her arms and pouts. “Some of us are single, you know.”
“Awww,” the other girl coos, wrapping her arms around KK’s shoulders. “Is little KK feeling a little lonely? Does little baby need a hug?”
“Man, get off me,” KK says, still with a pout on her face, eyebrows furrowed. She props her elbows onto the coffee table while the rest of you burst into laughter at her antics. “Anyways. Y’all got any questions or anything?”
Georgia’s arm falls down from your shoulders to your waist, her nails lightly scratching your side.
“Who is the new girl?” KK reads off of the screen. “Y’all so rude, damn. This is Y/N, my new best friend and love of my life.”
You laugh, awkwardly waving to the screen.
“Y/N who are you?” KK reads another awkwardly worded comment.
Georgia makes a face and squeezes your waist, silently telling you that you don’t have to answer.
“Who am I? Um… I’m Y/N, I’m twenty-two, I’m in college right now…” You trail off, trying to think of something interesting to say. “My favorite color is pink?”
“Girl why was that a question?” KK laughs.
“I don’t know what to say!” You exclaim, gesturing to the phone. “There’s- oh, my God there’s 856 people on here. Why are you like really famous? Holy shit.”
“Thank you,” KK smiles, twirling a piece of her hair.
Georgia puts her free hand on the side of your face, angling you towards her as she narrows her eyes at the camera.
“She is also my girlfriend. So don’t get any ideas.”
“Girl, I think they can tell,” KK laughs, gesturing to the way you and Georgia are practically glued together.
Georgia shrugs. “I love my girlfriend.”
“We can tell.”
The comments immediately flood in. Some of them are talking about how cute the two of you are, a few of them are obvious jokes about you stealing everyone’s wife, but the one that sticks out to you isn’t anything like that.
wbblvr552022 THAT is georgia amoore’s gf? does she need her eyes checked 😭
You swallow, but thankfully there are so many comments pouring in that no one else seems to catch it.
“When’d you guys meet?” KK reads. “Oh, Q and A time, guys.”
Georgia immediately breaks out into a wide smile, contagious, one that makes you smile too.
She squeezes your waist in excitement before immediately launching into a dramatic retelling of her seeing you with your friends after a game, then her subtle way of inviting you to the next game in the set, then her subtle way of getting your number.
“And… the rest is history.”
KK laughs at the corny phrase, and you can’t help but smile either.
You lean forward to read more comments. “Oh, Georgia- what is your favorite thing about me?”
Georgia immediately presses her mouth into a line.
KK exaggeratedly turns towards the two of you, waiting patiently for an answer. “Don’t be shy, girly. I’m excited to hear this one.”
“I don’t think I should answer,” Georgia says, grimacing slightly. “Feels like a trap.”
“Well, there’s definitely wrong answers.” You pat her cheek with a smile. “C’mon, give it a try.”
“Umm… everything.”
You hum, pretending to think about it. “I’ll accept it.”
“What?” She asks, her eyes wide. “What the fuck is the right answer, then?”
You press your finger to her lips, shushing her. “Don’t worry about it, babe. You’ll get it one day.”
She rolls her eyes, but kisses the pad of your finger pressed against her lips. You can’t help but smile, wondering if the camera picked up that small movement- but you also find yourself not really caring.
wbblvr552022 is it possible to have a favorite thing about y/n? girl is UGLY
user-1 @wbblvr552022 hey this is actually insane!
user-2 @wbblvr552022 wtf is wrong w u?
You frown.
You can’t keep the look off of your face, you can’t help the sudden tightness in your chest and the thoughts facing through your mind.
Why are they so mean? What did you ever do to them? Are they just jealous? Or are they just right?
Do you deserve Georgia?
KK, surprisingly, is the first to notice your frown in the reflection. Her eyes meet yours, and she doesn’t say anything for a second.
She subtlety covers her mouth with her hand.
“You good?”
You’re really thankful that Georgia has suddenly turned away from the two of you to talk over her shoulder with a few girls behind you. You don’t even know their names, you don’t even care.
You smile in response.
You grab Georgia’s free hand, and she automatically tightens her arm around your waist. You tuck yourself into her, breathing in her comforting scent.
She turns back to the camera, barely even noticing the way you’re tucked into her- she’s just happy you’re touching her. You watch her smile at the camera and feel her squeeze your hand.
“Y/N’s sad?” She suddenly asks. She frowns at the screen, and your eyes widen-
user-1 y/n disappearing into georgia over there 😭😭😭
user-2 @/user-1 GOD they’re so cute i cant
user-3 y/n looks kinda sad tho??
user-1 wait you’re right y/n girl what’s wrong
You make a face and do your best to brush it off.
“I’m just tired.” You swear Georgia can hear the lie. “Thank you guys for worrying, though.” You flash the camera a bright smile and a thumbs-up.
wbblvr552022 GIRL put those chompers away 😭
user-1 @wbblvr552022 HELLO???? YALL SEEING THIS?
Georgia is not convinced that you’re okay. You can tell. She’s kinda tense against you, and she keeps looking towards the door like she’s ready to just throw you over her shoulder and leave.
She tries to meet your eyes, but you’re persistent in avoiding her, instead staring at yourself in the camera. You know that as soon as she looks at you, she’ll see it in your eyes. The bit of doubt you can’t hide.
What if they’re just right?
She suddenly squints at the camera, her eyes narrowing as she grabs it- despite KK’s protest- scrolling up as your heart slams in your chest.
“The fuck?”
The pure venom she spits those simple words out with makes KK stop trying to get her phone back.
“Georgia-” You start, squeezing the hand you’re still holding- she lets go of your hand to hold the phone.
“Sorry,” she mutters, her eyes scanning over the comments.
user-1 nice up close view i see
user-2 you got something in your nose queen
wbblvr552022 break up w your ugly ass girlfriend… cause im bored 🎶
“Are you fucking serious right now?”
“Um, hey… G?” KK starts, confused and smiling in a slightly scared way. “What’s goin’ on..?”
user-1 who the fuck is @wbblvr552022 and why have they been literally bullying y/n in the chat…
Your heart is beating so fast right now it’s roaring in your ears. Something inside of you just knows that the only way someone could get this kind of reaction out of Georgia is if they hurt you.
And as much as you hate to admit it, your heart keeps snagging on something in your chest. It does kinda hurt, as much as you want to rise above it.
Georgia hands KK’s phone back to her. She turns to you. Fuck.
“You saw those, didn’t you?”
“Georgia,” you sigh, wrapping your arms around yourself. “It’s just some random person on the internet. Yes, I saw it, but it doesn’t matter what they say, right?”
Your words sound confident and mature, and maybe if your voice could have displayed that too then Georgia would have let it go.
But you’re lying to her- and yourself.
It does fucking bother you, it does make you feel like shit- it makes you want to never go in front of a camera again.
“It’s nothing.”
You finally meet her eyes.
Maybe her being this pissed off should scare you, or concern you- but honestly? The fire in her eyes only ignites a fire inside of you. Deep in your stomach.
“It’s not fucking nothing, the fuck? No, no one gets to treat you like that. No one gets to make you sad.”
You put your hand on her face.
“Babe, it’s really sweet that you want to protect me, but you’re just gonna drag it out and make it worse, yeah? Okay? I appreciate it and I love you, but it’s okay.”
She looks away from you, trying to take a deep breath that sounds more like a pissed-off huff, and your heart is still fucking snagging on something-
“You love me, right?”
You blurt it out before you can even think, all small and insecure, chasing her love and affection that you know you have. At least, you should know you have it. But it’s like something inside of you screaming that you just need to hear it, that she loves you, and you know you’ll regret it forever if you don’t hear her say it right now.
“Fuck this,” Georgia says, practically hissing the words.
She sticks her hand out and KK- who sweetly has been doing her best to not listen to the conversation- gives the phone back.
Georgia props the camera up again, angling it so it’s only on her.
“I’m not fuckin’ playing, okay? I don’t know what the fuck is your problem, but I will literally kill you if you keep saying shit about my girlfriend.” She laughs dryly, but everyone knows there’s nothing funny about the look in her eyes and the conviction in her words. “Don’t talk about her, don’t think about her- don’t worry about my girl, she’s good with me. Worry about yourself when I fucking find you.”
She lets the phone fall back onto the table, crossing her arms, and you can tell that there’s still thoughts racing through her head.
KK slowly grabs the phone.
“Well… y’all heard her. I think it’s time to go, though… so, bye-bye girly-pops!”
She presses a button and closes her phone, and you watch the screen turn to black.
“Well,” you start, looking between Georgia and KK. “That was… something!”
Georgia sighs, itching her nose. “Sorry, baby.”
“Excuse?” KK asks.
Georgia barely cracks a smile. “Sorry, KK.”
“So… uhm… what the fuck happened?”
Georgia gestures towards the phone, huffing. “Someone was talking shit about Y/N. Like, calling her ugly, I- fuck.” She takes a deep breath. “Yeah.”
“Man, really? I’m sorry, Y/N- I would have blocked them if I saw it.”
You smile. “It’s not your fault, K. And it’s not that big of a deal, really. I mean, it sucks, but whatever. I should get used to it, right?”
Georgia laughs. “No. I am never posting you again. I’m never letting you be in a live ever again. They can’t treat you right then they don’t get to see you.”
KK makes a face that forces you to stifle a giggle. “Okay, Ms. Possessive-and-Controlling.”
She smiles. “Is that a bad thing?”
Your cheeks suddenly feel hot, because it’s really not. And you know Georgia is mostly speaking out of anger- she’s not really gonna keep you hidden from the world of social media. She might, for a week or two, but then she’ll probably forget.
“It’s been a lot of fun, KK, but maybe Georgia and I should go home..?”
Suddenly, she has the biggest grin on her face.
—-
Laying with Georgia in your comfy bed, wrapped in comfy blankets, shrouded by darkness with her chest as your pillow is probably where you feel safest. Nothing can reach you here. Social media or physical, you’re completely safe in her arms and the darkness.
“Happy?” You mutter into the darkness, smiling as you think of how mad she was just an hour ago.
“I’m really bloody happy, actually.”
“Very long night of sharing me, huh? Poor baby.”
“I agree,” she yawns. “We shouldn’t ever go out again. We should just stay in this amazing bed.”
“Okay, baby,” you mutter with an eye roll, humoring her.
“Y/N,” she says after a blissful moment. You can hear it in her voice. The concern, the hesitation. “I love you. I love you so much sometimes I’m kinda convinced you put a spell on me. Like, it shouldn’t be possible to love someone this much.”
You smile.
“I’ve caught you in my web,” you tease. “But you walked right into it.”
“Yeah, I did,” she laughs. “But I love you. You shouldn’t have to question that. I’m not doing my job as your girlfriend if you do.”
She kisses your forehead.
“All I want is for you to be happy… right next to me, though.”
You sit up, placing your hands on her chest as you swing one of your legs over her waist.
“I don’t have any plans of leaving. Do you?”
Her hands immediately move to rub up and down you thighs.
“Nope. Also, I change my mind. I want you to be happy on top of me. Or under me, I’m not picky.”
You laugh, leaning down so you can kiss her nose. You hands work out knots in her perpetually tense shoulders.
“Always thinkin’ about sex,” you mutter.
“Always thinkin’ ‘bout you,” she corrects. “And fucking you.”
You’re about to kiss her when she suddenly pulls back.
“You’re sure you’re good?”
You smile at her sweet concern for you.
“Yes, Georgia, I’m good. I mean… I felt kinda shitty for a second. Doubting that I was good enough for you- it’s silly. I know I am. And I’m… trying not to care about what they think.”
She brushes some hair behind your ear, nodding.
“You know I love you, right?” She smiles when she says it, because both of you know she tells you and shows you possibly too much.
“I know you love me,” you smile, your lips ghosting over hers. “I love you, too, my basketball star.” You press a kiss to the corner of her lips- then her chin, and you’re about to kiss her neck-
“As sexy as that is, I still want to show you how much I love you. You doubted I loved you today. We can’t have that happening.”
She sits up, and you sit back on your heels, rolling your eyes. “I know you love me. It was a millisecond, babe-”
Her hands squeeze your waist.
“Why don’t you just shut your pretty mouth and lay on your back?” She kisses your neck, that one special place that only she knows to kiss, the place that she found by loving you and now covets like treasure.
A moan immediately spills out of your mouth.
“I can do that,” you breathe, reveling in the way her hands feel as she helps you lay back.
“I know you can, baby,” she smiles. “Be a good girl, now, yeah? Let me love you.”
You’re really fucking glad that you caught this girl.
—-
#georgia amoore#georgia amoore x reader#georgia amoore x you#georgia amoore x fem#wbb x reader#wbb fanfiction
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can you assuage my creeping fear about the debate between harris and trump? my brain is like. the media will be salivating over any chance to get the story HARRIS FLUBS THE DEBATE MORE AT 6 unless she's 100% perfect for it. i keep telling myself that she's an incredibly seasoned prosecutor who knows exactly what to do to unravel these sorts of people, she has plenty of time to prepare, he's completely gone over the edge into incoherence most of the time, but i also keep thinking of how, after weeks of her absolutely pile-driving the republican party, the media will be circling for any mistake, mis-step, or imperfection to blow out of proportion to make it seem like she's failing. i guess what i'm afraid of is the other shoe dropping? or the bubble bursting? i'm afraid of this hope?
i was barely aware of obama in 2008, too young to vote and not paying attention, so i don't know how this kind of momentum turned into the juggernaut that got him elected. i know you believe that the same can happen here, how did he take on the predatory press?
Well, first, we need to recognize that the media treatment of the debate WILL be wildly unfair, full stop. If Trump shows up and puts on pants, he will be applauded by the media, because they have the lowest imaginable bar where he is concerned and everything that would have been multiply-disqualifying for any other candidate makes them just shrug and find a way to make excuses for him. So yes, he will literally be congratulated if he shows up on September 10, because that is how the media works. See: three relentless weeks of bullying Biden out of the race after the bad debate, barely mentioning Trump's equally insane diatribes at the same debate, and now, when he's gone full-on demented and is raving about AI-generated crowds at Kamala's events? Nary a peep. Lol.
However, the main narrative that's emerging from the Harris takeover is that voters and the media are miles apart on where they actually see this race going, and without the media's favorite chew toy of Biden's shortcomings, it has become increasingly difficult to avoid focusing on Trump's flaws, even tangentially. See the mainstream media reporters whining constantly that Harris hasn't given them a press conference and congratulating Trump for lying to them nonstop for an hour; they simply have no frame of reference that's remotely useful, because they are so beholden to making Trump look like a normal candidate and focusing on Harris's "flaws" as if they are remotely comparable to his. But at the same time, there has been a far heightened level of pushback on this BS manipulation, and everybody can see through it, precisely because the media and/or the right-wing smear machine has tried this so many times before and their tactics are now completely transparent. Ordinary voters don't give a shit whether Harris WiLl tAkE qUesTioNs fRoM tHe mEdiA; they're too busy flooding her campaign with donations, attending her rallies, signing up for volunteer shifts, and so forth. In fact, the reason the media is trying SO HARD to kill her momentum is because they, like Trump, rely on doing so. The more they try and don't succeed, the more panicked they'll get. We have to prepare for that, and we have to have her back.
That said, we should recall that Harris easily crushed Pence in their debate in 2020, and Pence was actually halfway presentable at it compared to Trump (which is a low bar, but still). The way Trump "wins" is that he just repeats a lot of lies forcefully and over and over, which Biden was ill-prepared to counter because he has a far more deliberate and decisive speaking style (related to stutter/speech difficulties, temperament as a politician, etc). Everything that I have seen from the Harris campaign in terms of communication so far, however, has been the exact kind of clapback that makes Trump look stupid and which shows that they are very attuned to the kind of strategies that work against that nonsensical bullying Gish gallop. Therefore, I have to trust that they have INTENSIVELY studied what went wrong with Biden/Trump in June, and also empowered Kamala to do what she does in her fashion and which has been extremely successful thus far at knocking down Trump's BS. Also, she's just a better and more fluent communicator than Biden, she looks and sounds more energetic, and those stupid aesthetic Vibes are half of the battle when it comes to convincing the public.
Also, we should recognize that Trump looked deeply creepy on stage at the debates with HRC in 2016, and that was when he was downright sane compared to now. He stalked her, he stood behind her, he rolled his eyes, he bullied her, and people noticed that (he subsequently won the election, yes, but if nothing else, 2024 feels nothing like 2016). If he has to stand on stage with a black woman kicking his ass, after his appearance at the NABJ event in Chicago quickly became a touchstone for how badly he fucked it up, he is going to just look BAD, and when that's the case, people will immediately fit it into the existing narrative (that he's scared of Harris and deeply racist and unglued). You can also play your part in making sure it does. At least half of the Bidengate furor came from Democrats melting down and yelling about it afterward, and that led into the knives-out media coverage that spiraled for 3.5 weeks until Biden withdrew. We can, yknow, NOT DO THAT this time!
So: yeah. We have to be aware that yes, the media coverage of the debate will find absolutely every excuse to praise Trump and bash Harris, because that's just baked in. However, we can also understand that there's a wide-and-getting-wider CHASM between how ordinary voters see things right now and how the media is desperate to play it, and the more transparent they get, the more easily we are able to call it out. (See Lawrence O'Donnell's rant the other night.) We are going to have to keep doing that and not let up, but it's not going to go well for Trump either way and it's still an open question as to whether he even shows up after trying SO hard to dodge. It's not out of the question that he'll announce on September 4 that by Harris not showing up to the Fox debate she never agreed to and which exists only in his deluded mind, he doesn't have to do the same on September 10. He is a scared fucking orange chickenshit who KNOWS he's badly outmatched against Harris and whose entire campaign strategy at this point relies on lying low and trying not to make voters remember again how much they hate him, which is already backfiring. And with your help, we can make him MORE scared all the way to prison. Let's do it.
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3 times jack wanted to kiss you and the one time he did.
pairing(s): jack hughes x fem!reader
summary: 3 times jack wanted to kiss yn and the one time he finally did.
warning(s): absolutely none! pure fluff : )
word count: 2k
authors note: hiiii guys! guess who is back from the dead... ME. for some reason I've hated everything I've written recently but something changed today and here we are LOL. this is going to be my last installment?? last part?? idk how to word it ANYWAYS this is my last fic to this prompt, I really enjoyed writing all of the different players to this, it was so fun! I hope you guys enjoyed them as much as I did :'). anywhoooo! I'm working on more things, be on the look out for a luke fic tmr!! I hope you all are healthy and well. much love as always <3
1.
Jack was convinced he was going to throw up. His hands shook as he sat on the steps of the lake house, awaiting your arrival. He hasn't seen you since christmas, and it's now june, 6 months of not seeing his best friend. Who he might or might not be in love with, but that's besides the point. He couldn't wait to see you, and have you all to himself for the next two weeks, if his family doesn't peel you away from him, which is very likely.
The speed of Jack's bouncing leg started to pick up as he saw your car pulling down the gravel driveway. His heart beat rose, as a smile spread across his face. Jumping up as soon as your car was parked in place. He practically spirited to your driver's side, throwing the door open quickly, pulling you into a bone crushing hug before you even got out of the car.
“Jack!” your sweet voice giggled out, your face pressed into his neck, he couldn't help but take a deep breath of your shampoo, he can't believe you're actually here, in his arms.
“Hi. im sorry, i missed you” he says pulling back to get a look at your face, seeing a bright smile and wide eyes looking at him.
“I missed you too, Jack,” you say before leaning up on your toes, pressing a sweet kiss on his cheek. The kiss catches him by surprise, he can literally feel the heat rush to his face as you pull back, sending him another smile.
“Are you going to stand there and look at me like a lost puppy, or are you gonna help me bring my bags in?”
“Oh. yes, sorry "Jack says, clearing his throat, stepping away from yn moving towards her truck to get her things.
Yn follows behind him, opening the trunk, turning her back to him as she takes in the view of the lake in front of her.
“It's so pretty here jack, thank you for inviting me” yn says as she turns around, sending him another sweet smile before helping him grab her bags out the car.
“You’re welcome, I'm happy you’re here” jack says sending her a smile as he walks behind her towards the house.
He couldn't help but feel like something was different between them. The kiss that she placed on his cheek a few moments ago, had already left an invisible mark on his face. He couldn't help but imagine how her soft lips would feel on his. That's when jack hughes knew he was completely utterly in love with his best friend, and he really really wanted to kiss her,
2.
Ever since the lake house, something changed between jack and yn. Their communication became stronger, texting and calling almost everyday of the week. Innocent touches when they were together, Jack's hand never failing to find her lower back, yn always placing her hand on his arm, or maybe even moving to hold his hand. flirty banter between the both of them Jack couldn't help but feel like their friendship was beginning to blossom into something more.
Even with the sudden change in their relationship, Jack couldn't help but be nervous as he typed out a message, asking her if she’d like to be his plus one at a gala for charity event that devils players attended every year. She’s come with him to these types of things before but this time it felt different.
Hitting send on the message before turning his phone over. Jack let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding, he wasn't even sure why he was so nervous. His phone dings not even a second later, with a text. Opening it quickly when he sees it from you, his eyes running over the text, that says you'd be more happy to go with him. He smiles at the response, typing another text to you, about the date and time. He couldn't help but wish Saturday would come sooner.
–
Before he knows it's Saturday, and once again Jack's hands are shaking as he walks down the hall to your apartment, with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. Once he reaches your door, he can't help but worry if the flowers are too much. Do you even like flowers? Are you allergic to flowers? Pushing those thoughts down, deciding it's now or never, he says to himself as he knocks on your door.
“One second!” he hears you call out from the other side.
A minute or so passes before your door opens. Jack's breath leaves his body as he stares at you in awe. The floor length black dress you're wearing, fits your body like a glove. He can't help but trail his eyes up and down your body, taking all of your beauty in,
“Do you like it?” you say, breaking the silence
Jack swallows before speaking, “You look beautiful, yn”
“thank you, you look quite handsome yourself” she says with a smile
“Thank you. Oh! These flowers are for you” holding the flowers out for yn to grab. “I'm not sure if you like flowers, I can't remember what kind you like, or if you even like them at all. So I just got a random mix. I hope you like them.” jack rambles anxiously
“Jack” yn says, stepping closer to him, taking the flowers from him, and leaning just close enough to place a kiss on his cheek.
“They're beautiful, I love them. Thank you.” she smiles, “Now come inside, you look like a creep standing in hallway” she giggles
Nodding his head in response, following yn into her apartment, shutting the door behind them. Jack can't help but let his eyes wander to how her ass moves in the dress. Taking a deep breath as he runs his hand across his face, in attempts to pull himself together.
“I'm almost ready! I just need to put my shoes on and throw these flowers into a vase!” you yell from your bedroom
“Okay, take your time!” Jack says as he begins to slowly pace around your living room.
The only thought running through his mind was how good your body would feel against his, how your dress would look laying on the floor, and most importantly how your lips would feel against his.
3.
“So when are you gonna finally ask yn out?” quinn says from beside him
“What? Where did this come from?” jack asks, turning to look at quinn
“It's so obvious that you've been in love with her for literally forever”
“Its not..” jack trails off
“Dude. it is, you both are too scared to make the first move. She’s obviously into you”
“I don't think so, i can't read her sometimes” jack counters
“Are you serious” quinn scoffs
“Yes..?” jack says slowly
“Jack, can you do me a favor?” quinn asks
“Yes”
“Please, do me a favor.. grow a pair of balls and ask her out”
“What if she rejects me, and i ruin our friendship” jack says defensively
“Jack, for the love of god. She won't reject you. Just ask her” quinn sighs
“Okay okay. But if this all goes to shit, i'm blaming your dumbass” jack says, pointing at him
“It wont, but okay” Quinn replies, rolling his eyes.
“Should I ask her out in person? Of over text? Facetime? Call-”
“Call her now” quinn says cutting him off
“Now?”
“Yes jack, go call her now” quinn says, giving jack a slight shove
“Okay okay, i'm going” getting up before quinn can say or do anything else. Walking into the kitchen, pulling out his phone, clicking on your contact, moving his phone to his ear as it rings.
“Hi jack” you say, answering on the second ring
“Hi yn, i wanted to ask you something”
“Yes?”
“Are you busy this weekend?” he asks nervously
“No, I don't think so, why?” you ask
Taking a deep breath before he speaks, “I was wondering if you'd like to go out, like on a date, with me?” The line is quiet for a moment, Jack almost feels stupid for even asking, as you go radio silent.
“I would love too” you finally answer
“Really? I mean- okay great. I’ll pick you up on Friday at 7?”
“Friday at 7 works for me” you say, jack can practically hear the smile in your voice as you speak
“Okay great, i'll see you then” he smiles
“Bye jack”
“Bye pretty girl, see you friday '' he says before ending the call, he can't help but throw his hands in the air like he's celebrating a goal.
“QUINN!” he yells
“Yes?” quinn answers as he walks into the kitchen
“SHE SAID YES!!!” he shouts, before pulling quinn into a hug
“What did i tell you”
“I know”
“But hey, at least you finally did it. Maybe you'll get that kiss you've been wanting so bad, "Quinn says, smacking his back before walking out of the kitchen. Shaking his head at his brother's statement, even though he can't help but hope he's right.
Because Jack really really really wants to kiss you, and he's not sure how much longer he can wait.
+1
“Okay give me your hands' 'Jack says to a blindfolded yn, who's holding out her hands as she begins to follow him, walking like a baby beer who's just taking its first steps.
“Jack, i swear to god if i fall, i will kill you”
“Calm downnnn, you know I won't let that happen. Especially on our first date '' Jack says, sending her a smile even though she can't see it.
“Okay how much longer? I'm getting nervous” yn asks
“Almost there pretty girl, be patient”
“I’m tryingg ” yn whines to him
Jack couldn't help but chuckle at her, “only a few more steps, i promise” he says, walking them about 5 more steps before stopping.
“Okay are you ready?” he asks
“Very”
Taking a deep breath, Jack moves in front of her, pulling off the blindfold from her face, moving beside her once it's off. Yn’s jaw drops slightly in awe as she stares at the sight in front of her.
A picnic setup lays out in front of her, with every type of snack you can possibly want, all of her favorites. Along with a bunch of pillows, a bottle of wine, flowers; you name it, it's there. Her eyes couldn't help but water as he stared in awe. Jack's hands nervously move from beside her, waiting for her to say something.
“Jack..” yn starts, turning towards him, “this is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I can't believe you did all of this”
“You deserve nothing less than the best” he smiles
“You're so sweet. Thank you this is all so amazing” she says, moving closer to him, Jack who's thinking he's about to get another sweet kiss on his cheek is greatly surprised when he feels her lips come in contact with his. His lips against hers before his brain even registers what's happening.
Her hands snaked around his neck, as their kiss deepenes. Jack's hands move to her waist, pulling her body into his as their lips continue to move together as one. A few moments pass before the pull away, their lips swollen as they stare back at each other.
“I wanted to do that for a long time” he says
“Me too.” yn replies
“Wanna do that again?” jack asks with a small smirk
“I'd thought you'd never ask” yn replies before reconnecting their lips
#nhl fanfiction#nhl hockey#nhl x reader#nhl imagine#nhl fic#new jersey devils#jack hughes imagine#jack hughes fluff#jh86#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes
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For the caitvi: dog meet cute
[if u have been here a minute u know i try to give every character a border collie bc they're my passion lol HOWEVER. vi + a big rescue pitty is an actual dream come true. i just rly love dogs & force free handling & nurturing of dogs. so here u go, they are my babies]
//
vi is practically vibrating next to you in excitement, which is endearing but a little unsettling as she drives. she'd insisted you take her bronco, because she's convinced the car will immediately be scratched and dirty inside — which isn't even true, and also she's put more work into her car than you ever will any of yours. still, you'd acquiesced without too much arguing — more for fun than anything else — and then gone through the actual items on the checklist the rescue had recommended. you spent the past day making sure there were no holes in the fence and that the gate properly latched; you'd gotten bowls and the food recommended by the vet you'd found — fear free certified, vi had said after her research, proudly showing you the results of a very nice vet clinic near your new house — and a few toys and balls, a snuffle mat, and a cute little toy you can fill with peanut butter or yogurt for him to lick. you'd gotten a ton of training treats and bully sticks, marrow bones and duck feet; you pick out two comfortable beds to put in the living room and your bedroom; vi had liked a pink harness, collar, and 6' lead, which had made you laugh and then kiss her right in the middle of the pet store; you order a long lead to go with it later that night.
so, by all accounts and purposes, you are very ready.
still, vi is acting more nervous than she had when she'd taken her lieutenant's exam a few months ago, more nervous than when you were waiting to hear back about jinx's acceptance to her graduate program, more nervous than the first night you'd really moved into your house and fell asleep on the couch, sated and spent, in front of the fireplace. you'd loved this house for many reasons, but one of the big ones was its beautiful yard: vi has been looking at rescue dogs on her phone for the entire time you've known her.
'i can't believe it's really happening,' she says, again, as she takes the turn onto the street the rescue is located on.
'we're going to have so much fun, and give him such a good home.'
she breathes a sigh out and takes her hand off the gear shift to squeeze yours. you'd brought it up a few weeks ago, maybe looking into a dog, since you had the space, and you lived together now, and you owned the house, rather than having pet restrictions in an apartment. there had been a million excuses she'd offered, all of them poor and all of them because she was just nervous. you know how well you can manage things, how that's a way you're good at showing your love, and you know how gentle and nurturing v's nature is when given the chance.
she parks and you kiss her gently. 'hey, any dog would be lucky to be raised by rich lesbians with no kids.'
it gets her to laugh, finally, her nerves dissipating. 'speak for yourself. i'm not rich.'
you roll your eyes — it's not a secret that you want to get married one day, that you like making sure that vi — and her family — has everything they need, especially since you make enough money through your own work to not need any of your trust fund. 'rich in love.'
she groans but takes your hand anyway, laces your fingers together before you open the door.
the rescue coordinator and trainer meet you in the lobby, smiling, and compliment vi on her treat bag and the collar, harness, and leash set you'd brought. you had applied for the dog the week before, having seen his picture for one second and then showing it to vi, and you'd watched a soft smile grow on her face. you'd gone through a video call interview, and now all that's left is an in-person meet-up to see if a trial adoption period feels good for both of you and the dog.
he's already alone in the little play yard with one of the other volunteers, and you hear vi sniffle next to you, and then laugh, when you look her way, before getting down on her knees.
'hi, atlas,' she says, as you crouch down too, and it doesn't take even a second before the dog — muscular and goofy, with a blocky head, mostly black fur with a few white spots — bounds over to both of you and bowls vi over with how excited he is.
you laugh, and you get out your phone to take a few pictures; vi kisses his head and you rub behind his ears. you understand that it's important, and good, that the rescue does a trial adoption period, but his eyes are a grey-blue and he has a scar above one of them, and after vi throws the ball and you play tug with him a little, he just lies down half in her lap while she scratches his offered tummy — you know that there's no way this dog is ever going back.
'it's a good thing you're, uh, you know... fit,' the trainer says, a little flustered at the obvious muscles and veins of vi's arms in one of her t-shirts, you think, which, okay, you do understand. 'we're working on his leash skills, still, and he's getting so much better! but he's a strong guy.'
you'd, of course, read atlas' bio: he was rescued off the side of the road, alone, starving and sick, and he's spent almost the last two years at the rescue, cared for, of course, but overstimulated. he's loved his field trips, and he's friendly to kids, other dogs, even cats. he's active, park plays and hikes, but he really just wants to cuddle and sleep. mostly, he's been overlooked because he's a strong pit bull with a big bark. vi had immediately wanted him, even if she hadn't quite said so: you'd understood.
the trainer talks you through helping him feel safe as you put his new harness on, but he really doesn't seem to care at all when you offer him some chicken as a reward after. he licks your face and, admittedly, you are kind of in love already. the trainer plays with him while you and vi go inside and fill out the final paperwork, and he seems more subdued when you come back. but, 'you're so smart, huh?' vi says to him, the second he starts getting excited when she takes his leash and walks toward the exit. he starts whining and pulling, but when you get through the door, your hand in vi's, atlas turns around and jumps on both of you a few times. it doesn't bother you, and it makes vi cry, so you don't even try to coax him away with treats: you just let him feel freedom, safe and sound, for the first time.
//
atlas rides calmly in the car on the way home, watching everything out the window in his little dog car hammock, easily tolerating when you'd secured him with the seat belt extension that attached to his harness. jinx, unsurprisingly, has already come over when you get home, and she laughs and falls back on the ground, letting him lick all over her face, when he rams into her in hello. she slips a custom, thank you very much bandana — a lot of neon pink — onto him and kisses his forehead, but she has class, she pouts, so she promises to be over again tomorrow to play with him.
you and vi show atlas around the house, direct him to some toys; vi gives him a few chew options to see which one he'll pick — a beef marrow bone, no surprised there — and then he settles on the bed in the living room and works on his bone for an hour, both of you just smiling and watching from the couch, before he finishes and lumbers over to you, hopping up and burrowing in between you with a sigh.
vi starts to cry again, which makes you start to cry, and you both just sit there, laughing too, while you pet him.
'you have to know that this is, like, you in dog form, right?' you ask eventually.
'a brilliant and sensitive heart behind a strong, rugged exterior? of course.'
she's using humor to deflect — you both know at this point — but you let her get away with it this time.
//
atlas settles in easily, like he was always meant to be yours, and maybe he was. one morning, when vi is on shift, you take him on his long line to your favorite trail just outside the city and just let him walk and sniff for an hour or so, and then sit with you on the patio of your favorite cafe while you have a coffee. he sleeps and says hello when people ask, and, while he still gets so excited he often knocks jinx and vi over still when they get home, he's so gentle greeting strangers that you have to fight back tears. when you take him to the crag a month in, he makes friends with every person there and then gnaws on a bully stick before sleeping the afternoon away in a patch of sun.
for years, since you'd met vi, she'd had a hard time sleeping: you knew why, and you understood it. you'd tried all kinds of things to help with her insomnia and nightmares: therapy, and medication, and different techniques to ground and calm. it's always been a losing battle, though, things getting worse after long, hard shifts where calls had gone bad; oftentimes you'd get home from a full day at work and she hadn't slept at all since she got home from a 24 hour shift that morning: it hasn't been uncommon for her to go thirty hours without any good sleep for as long as you'd known her.
today, you'd been expecting the same thing: dark circles beneath her eyes, exhausted muscles that still can't rest, a painstakingly cooked dinner she'd prepared to, somehow, in her mind, make up for all of it. you'd talked to her on her drive home this morning, her short responses about the call she'd gone on dealing with an apartment fire in her childhood neighborhood last night telling you more than a robust description ever could.
when you walk in, though, the living room is dark, the fireplace mostly embers. it's cold outside, windy and probably going to snow tonight, so usually she would stoke it for you before you get home. there's no smell of dinner, and you don't hear atlas' paws scrambling to come jump on you in hello. for a split second, you're kind of terrified, before you notice the sound of snoring, and then your eyes find them: atlas is almost completely on top of vi on the couch, one of her hands still on his shoulders and the other stretched behind her head. they're both breathing deeply, soft snuffles and sighs, and you almost sink to your knees right then and there. you have your own demons, your own discussions in therapy and fights with your mom and aches in the middle of the night, but vi spent years of her life in the dark, alone, kept from any love or care, being treated like a dangerous animal. you want to marry her; you want jinx to annoy the hell out of you for years; you want a life with her, forever.
so you wipe your tears and put your coat away quietly, put your bag away and set your computer to charge in the office. you'd tentatively made plans to climb with vi after you'd gotten off work, mostly because it helps regulate her nervous system, even if you're both exhausted. but instead, you ease yourself gently onto the coffee table across from the couch and touch her face, then scratch behind atlas' soft ears.
'hello, my darlings.'
vi startles awake, disoriented, but then takes stock of atlas — who seems excited you're home, from the happy thump of his tail, but unwilling to move, far too warm and comfortable — and her eyes meet yours, a little smile sneaking its way onto her face. 'hey, cupcake.'
'it's nearly six.'
'oh. wow.'
'yeah?'
'i've been asleep for, like, five hours, i guess.'
you both almost burst into tears, but you kiss her forehead instead and say, 'shall we order in? movie night? it looks like mr. atlas here doesn't want to give up his prime spot.'
vi rubs her thumb along your cheek, always adoring, always gentle. 'ramen?'
'you drive a hard bargain.'
you don't talk about it further then: you go change into a pair of shorts and one of vi's sweaters, and atlas pouts but makes room for you on the couch too, eventually resting his head in your lap, and you put in your typical ramen order on your phone before vi picks a movie you'd both wanted to watch and had missed in theaters. she gets up, eventually, to open a bottle of wine for you and grab a beer for herself, and to put a new log on and then stoke the fire, before curling back up into your side.
'you know, i've thought about his name.'
'yeah?'
'jinx has come up with, like, seven thousand nicknames, some of which he responds to because she feeds him cheese all the time.'
vi rolls her eyes, but you laugh.
'but, you know. the weight of the world, and all that.'
'like i said, you in dog form.'
vi shakes her head but it becomes common occurrence, as the weeks and months and years go on, to come home to her after a shift, held down by altas, happily resting with her: a peace that's hard-found and even harder-earned, a companion for it all.
#arcane#arcane fic#caitvi#CAN YOU BELIEVE! GET VI A BIG TOUGH BABY OF A DOG STAT!#& then let them NAP!#this rly is just soft. but PICTURE it#atlas the people's princess fr
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Idk if you do asks but can you do a 6 month old demon story where Al stays too late at a overlord meeting and you have to go get him??
Hope you're doing well!
Sure, I can give it a try. I hope it's what you were looking for lol 🙂
...
Challenges of Raising a 6 Month Old Demon
If Mama Ain't Happy...
...
It was 11:26 pm at the entrance to the Carmine Compound and you were knocking at the large metal door aggressively. Your husband had promised to be back home to in time to give you an evening off from your motherly and hotel responsibilities (a luxury you hadn’t had for quite some time), yet he still hadn’t shown up for hours past when he was due to reappear. You were more pissed off than worried, so, without any other choice, you strapped your dozing fawn to your chest and set off.
After about 10 minutes of banging, you were greeted by the unenthusiastic, but familiar, demeanor of Carmillia Carmine. “I believe you have something of mine.”, you firmly voiced out. In response the tall demoness merely nodded and lead you up in the elevator. Your ire was palpable. You very clearly felt the raised tension in the air as static buzzed over your skin and your sensitive ears picked up the voice of an angry Alastor and another, equally aggressive voice coming from the room you were approaching. Evangeline also felt and heard the familiar aura of her father as she kicked her little hooves out excitedly. “We we’re hoping you would come to get him.”, Carmillia sighed tiredly when she pushed open the door and gestured to the two arguing men, “They’ve been in this pissing contest for hours!”
You looked around the room and spotted your mate leaning over his cane and arguing into the flat face of Vox. Rosie smiled at your tired face with sympathetic expression and shrugged her thin shoulders. “And another thi-“, Alastor was cut off when he heard the high pitched shriek of his daughter who was wriggling in her carrier. His ears flattened onto his head as he immediately jerked his head around to meet the fury of your gaze. “Ah…d-darling, I was just on my way home when this blowhard dared to comment on my-“, he cut himself off once again when you silently, but intently, walked towards him. The room’s tension rose with every step you took.
It wasn’t often that you found yourself upset, but your anger was always a force to be reckoned with, and Alastor was far too intelligent to pit himself against it. So he merely stood still in silent terror.
You stopped directly in front of him, face to chest, before quickly throwing him over your shoulder. Vox laughed at Alastor’s embarrassed bleat but the glare you shot in his direction wiped away any of his amusement. You held your scrawny Alastor tightly and turned on your heel to leave.
“I believe this playdate is over.”, you uttered softly to everyone in the boardroom and took your family home.
...
Sorry it's kinda short, Anon. I actually wrote this really quick while my own fawn was distracted by The Wiggles 😂
(p.s.- I friggin hate The Wiggles now)
-SSPR
#hazbin hotel#alastor the radio demon#hazbin alastor#alastor#alastor x reader#alastor x you#babies be cray
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Phantom Troupe music headcanons because i cannot stop projecting my interests onto them
in honor of me creating 6 different playlists today, here’s my thoughts on what type of music the Phantom Troupe would be into :>
Chrollo
Likes classic goth bands such as The Cure and Bauhaus, and is also really into classical music
Avid collector of the most obscure type of music that no one has ever heard of
Like what do you mean the first hour of your playlist is just Gregorian chants??
Listens to artists who have roughly 7 monthly listeners, and somehow he is 3 of them
Also an insane music nerd
He just somehow knows everything about different genres and their societal significance
Will also go into long rants about music based subcultures and their relevance
Nobunaga
Bit pretentious with it lol
Just doesn’t get modern music
Big fan of anything from the 70s or 80s though
Any song he can get nostalgic over tbh
Probably likes Johnny Cash as well??
Just picture any music that you’d hear at a suburban barbecue organized by single dads and he’d know all the songs by heart
Feitan
I don’t see him as someone who listens to a lot of music tbh
But when he does it’s some obscure shit
Probably more into instrumentals than vocals
Again, doesn’t care much, just know that it has to sound haunting or moody, otherwise he’ll turn that shit off
Shalnark swears he once saw him nodding along to Elton John but no one believes him
That did happen actually
He blames Phinks
Machi
Another one who doesn’t listen to a lot of music, but does have a few playlists she rotates between
Went through an emo phase when she was younger and still knows all of the lyrics to basically every Paramore song
Now she’s more partial to artists like Lana Del Rey and Girl in Red
Likes chill songs that aren’t too intense, just here for some good vibes that don’t distract too much
Phinks
Dad rock.
That’s it. That’s the headcanon
Single-handedly responsible for half of Led Zeppelin’s streams
Argues with Nobunaga over who has the better taste in music even though there’s actually a lot of overlap in their tastes
Has a guilty pleasure for emotional ballads as well but he’d sooner die than admit that out loud
Shalnark
Listens to everything
And when I say everything I mean everything
Has about a million playlists all for hyper specific scenarios and moods, but the only playlist he ever actually listens to is just a massive collection of all his favorite songs
It’s definitely over 50 hours long, and will switch from Britney Spears to Pierce the Veil, then the entire Shrek soundtrack, followed by old school country, of course some lo-fi beats, and then goes right back to ABBA
Everyone hates it but he loves it
If it sounds good it’s going in his playlist
Half of the songs he listens to are in languages he doesn’t even speak
Franklin
Chill music because he’s a chill guy
Likes the blues and jazz
But can also appreciate some 90s grunge
When driving, he’s the only one allowed on the aux because no one else can be trusted to play music that everyone will enjoy
Somehow he just knows exactly what songs to play with different people so that everyone can enjoy themselves
Shizuku
Unironically listens to elevator music
Another one of those ‘If I like it, I like it’ people
Really doesn’t care about genres or what’s popular
But I do think that Sufjan Stevens is one of her top artists every year
Does tend to listen to the same song on repeat for hours without even realizing it though
Pakunoda
Her taste in music is timeless and classy, much like herself
To her, it’s important that music shows emotion or tells a story
Debussy and Chopin are some of her favorites
She likes smooth, elegant music, perfect to dramatically sip wine to
Also prefers vinyl records over their digital counterparts
Honestly her music is the perfect ambience for planning heists
Bonolenov
Bono, being the walking music instrument he is, has a very deep connection to music
He has an insane sense of rhythm, and likes his music to be very rhythmic as well
The type of music you can dance to
While nothing will ever beat the music from his own tribe, he also loves exploring traditional music from different cultures all over the world
Preserving that type of music is very important to him
He can probably deduce a songs hidden meaning or secret story very easily, even if others are struggling to even comprehend what they’re listening to
He can certainly appreciate the artistry of different genres as well
But culturally significant music will always interest him most
Uvogin
All genres of metal and rock
As long as it’s loud, he’ll like it
Definitely the type of person to listen to Motörhead at 3AM and fall asleep to Black Sabbath
Could definitely do the vocals in a metal band if he felt like it
Also listens to Frank Sinatra religiously
I’m sorry I don’t make the rules that’s just how it is
Kortopi
Probably really likes very experimental stuff
Something that’s unconventional and just a tad eerie
Has never made a playlist once and doesn’t plan to
Just picks a song he likes and then listens to whatever’s suggested next
Probably listens to haunted house music to relax
Like out of tune organs with creaky doors in the background
The occasional whisper of a ghost
Everyone thinks it’s really weird but he’s enjoying himself lmao
And of course, they are all theater kids in their own right, so play any song from broadway and they’ll sing along (some more enthusiastically than others)
#are some of these based on my own questionable listening habits?#Maybe#hxh headcanons#phantom troupe#phantom troupe headcanons#hxh#hunter x hunter#chrollo#nobunaga#feitan#machi komacine#phinks#shalnark#franklin bordeau#shizuku murasaki#pakunoda#bonolenov#uvogin#kortopi
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