#By the way I got Sonic Heroes next birthday!!

[sonysakura]

Story time! ✨

Back when I got into Sonic there were only two games available at local retail stores: SADX and Sonic Heroes. Obv I wanted both and since we didn't have any allowance and no money of our own (aside from tiny amount of change we got for grocery shopping chore), it had to be only one and had to wait for my birthday. A couple of months after I learn about these CDs my birthday finally rolls around and! I get SADX! Of course, we immediately try to install it which it does… but the game crashes right after the intro. Reinstalled, fiddled with the settings, etc. Same results… So we take it to the store with the receipt and everything, the girl there checks the disc out for scratches, then pops it into their PC, installs the game and it works perfectly, she shrugs and says tough luck, no returns for perfectly good CDs 😭 You don't know how many times I rewatched that SA1 intro as it was the only piece of the game I had…

My best friend later let me install the game on her PC but with a prerequisite that we play the game together, so there were some parts I never played with my own hands, and then she had to uninstall the game before we could complete it anyway for some reason I don't remember…

Then another friend lets me borrow his SADX CD that was a repack with pre-rendered cutscenes cut from it so there was no intro for example. It installs and it actually plays! But at random times it crashes (not every session!) and sometimes it freezes our PC, and finally it manages to make it bluescreen. That's when Dad bans the game forever 😭😭

When I got my own laptop though, I was in a very time-consuming university (and then work) and didn't have time for gaming 🤷 So it had to be 2020 for me to be able to replay SADX properly. And hey, it was installed from that very same 2004 CD I got for my birthday =D

[flightyalrighty]

FIRST | PREVIOUS | NEXT CH 1 PG 36

Infested will return on June 27th. --- Thank you to the following Ascended supporters: @chaogongoozles, @fiiresiidefrfr, @elizard4227, @grogar, Ezzoh, @susivoi, @calculuscacophony, Eros, @ivycorp, @summersdale @borrelia, @mizukiz, @sanicdetails, @combinegrunt-echo-1, Pica, @veeceear, @quackenburt, ItsmeMonarch, @memendoemori, @trans-girl-sonic, & savarsenic

Content Warnings | Store | Ko-Fi (Discord!) | Read On Comic Fury! DISCLAIMER: "Infested" is a horror comic ft. content not suitable for those under the age of 17.

A long-winded looking back on things below the cut:

The first few pages of Infested were uploaded to this blog on March 2nd, 2023 -- Over a whole year ago! I was so busy, too, that I completely missed its birthday (Sorry Infested). Looking even further back than that, the original story was was something I began writing on December 25th, 2022 (Merry Christmas).

It took two years to get to this point.

And hey, not to toot my own horn about it, but completing even one chapter of a webcomic is a big deal. Especially for me. My first webcomic, Fight/Flight, didn't get very far. I completed the prologue, started Chapter 1, and then had to drop it for a number of reasons (I didn't really agree with what baby-me had to say, politically, anymore).

This comic was born from a lot of intense feelings. The story, itself, too. Some good. Some bad.

I had been forced to move away from my hometown, and with that move, I lost the physical connection that I had to all of my friends. I lost the familiarity of a place I'd known for most of my life. I'm now stuck somewhere... Worse. It felt like a cage. Still does. Disconnected from the life I thought I would be living after college. I didn't have health insurance, either -- Got kicked off of it because of the move -- And as a result, I was off my antidepressants.

So there I was, at a pretty low point in my life. I miserable and lonely and every single day dragged on. And on. And on. And I felt so disappointed in myself. That disappointment became self-loathing, and it all kinda spiraled.

Have I mentioned that I'm a huge Sonic fan? I don't think I need to. I'd say it's pretty obvious. But for the sake of this story, I'll say it again: I'm a HUGE Sonic fan. I've been that way since 2003 with Sonic Heroes. The franchise has been in my life for over two decades. I had a monthly mail subscription to Archie's Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic the Hedgehog was something that I truly loved more than any other piece of media. It brought me endless joy. Until I didn't.

I had dropped Sonic after Lost World was... Itself. I had already felt pretty irritated with the Meta Era, and Lost World was the final straw. The last bit of hope that the series could recover was snuffed out when Forces was released. It was over. I was done. If Sonic was truly that embarrassed by itself, if they had truly lost touch with what made the series so great, then I wouldn't waste my time any longer. I was so sure that I had to just... Grieve and move on. My beloved childhood game series was dead. Long live the king or whatever. I'd just bitterly read IDW Sonic and think about what could've been. I was lucky to have that comic, at least. Archie had been canceled, too, after all. I was lucky to have my scraps.

Then Sonic Frontiers came out. And it changed everything.

And my god, it was everything. It was everything to me. Flaws be damned, it was everything. To. Me. The spectacle. The serious tone. The vastly improved writing. Kellin Fucking Quinn. It was FUN! It was actually FUN to PLAY. He was back. I was back. Sonic pulled me by my hand out of the ocean of misery I'd fallen into, and he looked me in my eye and he said;

"Hey. You're gonna be alright."

Metaphorically speaking. Sonic The Hedgehog didn't actually literally speak to me -- And sure, okay, maybe it's a little dramatic to describe a game as this great Depression Annihilator but I'm dead serious when I say that, for that time, before I was able to get back on my meds, I was self-medicating with Sonic.

Sonic was all I was thinking about. I reread the Unleashed arc in Archie Sonic, which got me sorta realizing something, and which led to my post where I said something along the lines of "Sonic would hide a zombie bite."

Archie Sonic would, at least. Because he basically did do that in the Unleashed arc of that comic. He let that problem fester until it became an even bigger problem because, ironically, he didn't want to be a problem.

So one thing led to another. I thought more about Sonic becoming a zombie. Bada-bing, bada-boom, Infested was born.

I didn't expect it to get the attention that it did. I felt lucky when the first page I drew Rouge on (Page 6 I think?) blew up. The right people saw it at the right time. I'm extremely grateful for that.

I'm extremely grateful for all of you.

So yeah, one chapter. Woo! Here's to many more.

[rainychaoloveshack]

ﾟ ⋆ ﾟ ☂︎ ⋆ ﾟ 𝐁𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐬. 𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐡𝐨𝐠 & 𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞𝐡𝐨𝐠.

its time to celebrate their birthday, right as the clock strikes twelve.

°•☁︎content. sonic and scourge x gn!reader, tooth-rotting fluff, angst in scourge’s drabble about his past but still very fluffy, light alcohol consumption (scourge) °•☁︎warning. mentions of parental neglect/child abuse (scourge).

☂︎ wc. around 1 k each drabble, 2k combined. ☂︎ a/n. awawawa its their bday today!!! i wouldve written something for shadows “birthday” on the 19th, but i had only learned that it was his pseudo bday the day of :( ill be dropping one or two shadow fics this week tho so hopefully that makes up for it!

likes, reblogs, and especially comments are extremely appreciated!!!

Sonic’s body shifts under his covers as you nudge him lightly, trying to awaken him from his slumber, with ears twitching and his mouth turning downward into a frown at the sudden disturbance. Yet his eyes open slowly and peer up at you, obviously drowsy, but he seems to recognize you even in that sleepy haze.

“Hmm? [Name]?” Sonic grumbles out, sitting up on his elbows quickly. “Why’re you in my room so late? Is something wrong?” Despite being tired still, he sits up fully, switching the lamp on beside his bed, and pushes himself towards the edge, letting his legs fall off the side. “Bad dream, huh?”

Always so alert, even after being awoken so abruptly. Such is the attitude of a hero, but you nudge his cheek affectionately with your finger and shake your head, trying to ease his worries as soon as they sprouted up.

“No? Ah, I got it,” he snaps his fingers, pointing up to you as a teasing smile grows on his face to place the frown, “you needed a sleep buddy, yeah?” He chuckles, patting the spot that's open next to him. “You know my bed is always open for you.” Sonic gives you a chuckle, giving you a toothy grin, but you shake your head again and his smile drops.

“Huh? Then what’s up?” He cocks his head to the side, looking up at you curiously with those green eyes you’ve always been so fond of. Extending your hands out briefly, you give him a signal to wait as you briskly trot out the door to fetch his surprise.

In his drowsy haze, he must’ve not noticed the clock struck twelve already, signaling that his birthday had already started. And of course, you had to be the first one to wish him such, even in the dead of night.

Using your hips, you push open the door slowly, the birthday cake slowly emitting a soft, amber light with a single birthday candle lit in the middle. Sonic’s face lights up into one of shock, his body straightening as you bring the cake over to him. 

“A cake?” He asks, heads turning frantically to search for his alarm clock, seeing the red digits read out 12:23 AM. “For me? Right now?” You nod, taking a seat next to him as you hold the cake in your lap, taking note of his wagging tail underneath the sheets, and the twitching ears as you start to sing Happy Birthday softly, watching his parted lips turn into a small smile at the sound of your voice; a melody he’s always loved listening to, more than any song composed.

“Aw man, I dunno what to say…” Sonic mutters, flustered as he brushes his quills downward with a hand; a fidgeting habit you've noticed with him before, along with tapping his foot on the ground, picking at his gloves, whistling; and the like. “Thanks, [Name]. You really didn’t have to do any of this for me; honest…”

How humble. A great hero deserves a good celebration, no? Even if it’s something small like this, between the two of you. Lifting the cake off your lap, careful to avoid the flame, you hold it in front of him and give him a little nudge with your leg; a little signal.

“Oh right, my wish! Huh…” He stares into the amber light from the candle for a moment, before shutting his eyes and letting silence fill the room instead. With the way Sonic’s eyes squeeze shut and his brows furrow, he must be wishing hard tonight. But as the thought slips in, he blows out the candle, smoke emitting from the now burnt-out tip. “By the way; you didn’t get a plate, or fork, or anything.” Sonic gestures toward the cake, deciding to take a small swipe of frosting off the top and licking it off his finger. “Oh, that’s pretty nice…”

Does he want to eat it now? You tilt your head at his statement, surprised at his appetite so late at night. You were just going to stuff it in the fridge for later. Sonic usually appreciates his rest more than the average person would, so it wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for him to fall asleep right after all of this, but he seems eager to spend more time with you.

“Well, uh,” He chuckles, meeting your gaze and scratching at his cheek as his ear twitches at your confusion. “having a piece of it with you right now sounds pretty nice. I mean, later on once the sun’s up, everyone's just going to celebrate like they always do.” He explains, stopping his scratching to reach over and fidget with the hem of your shirt, pulling at it as his head tilts back down to look at the cake. “But right now it’s just you and me, so…”

Look at Mr. Blue blur, thinking ahead. Time to fetch the cutlery.

And after fetching everything you need, while you slice into the cake, you can’t help but ask him an important question about tonight, customary to ask on anyone's birthday.

“My wish?” Sonic says, watching you put his slice of cake onto the plate, along with passing him a fork. “No point in telling you, 'cause then my wish won’t come true, right?” With a cheeky grin, his own laughter follows right after, but once he sees your unamused face, he clears his throat and continues. “But even if it doesn’t, it’ll be fine.”

It’s not hard to tell that his gaze is on you, even as you’re cutting the next slice to give to yourself. Not that it’s uncomfortable, since as you look up briefly to lock eyes with him, it’s so warm that it sends butterflies to your stomach, fluttering all around.

“I might already have what I wished for, anyway.”

“A cake? You got me a whole cake this fuckin’ late?” Scourge growls, rubbing his eye as he peers up at you from his spot on his bed, but being stuck with him for so long has made you accustomed to his little complaints. It’s nothing that's ever meant from true malice, anyway. “‘S like two in the mornin’.” You grin and shrug it off, sitting down next to him as you set the cake down on your lap, the candle already lit and ready to be blown out.

“Tch. Man, aren’t you stupid…” He says, staring at the lit cake more thoughtfully than he usually would, despite his harsh words directed towards you. “Even put a candle on it.” He grumbles, opening his mouth to say something else, but your soft voice breaks his words as you start to sing Happy Birthday to him. And all of that fake irritation and tenseness just melts away, fighting back a smile on your face as you watch his shoulders relax under your voice; his guard formed by his trauma just breaking away, bit by bit.

Scourge clicks his tongue once you finish singing, refusing to meet your eyes as he looks off to the side, a soft growl growing in his throat, despite not being genuine. “This is stupid…” He glances back at the amber candle, sighing. “Fine. I’ll blow it out, if it makes ya happy.”

He’s forgetting something.

“Make a wish?” His face contorts into one of skepticism. “I don’t got nuthin’ to wish for.” Scourge stares down at the lit candle, but he entertains your little demand and shuts his eyes, silent for a few moments before blowing out the candle quickly. It’s hard not to wonder what he wished for.

“A hint? The hell do I look like givin’ ya a hint?” Scourge starts, grinning at your unamused frown. Party pooper. “Doesn’t matter what I wished for anyway. I already got all I need.” Oh. Your playful demeanor drops at his little statement; coupled with the way he’s looking at you, it doesn’t take a genius to know what he’s gesturing towards.

“Quit ooglin’ at me and cut the cake.”

Now why’s he in such a hurry? You didn’t even get to tell him what else you got for tonight…

“... Holy shit, really? Champagne? This late?” Scourge grins at your mention of the alcohol. “Man, you really don’t care, huh?”

“Thanks, babe.” He mumbles, poking and picking at the cake slice with his fork, appetite seemingly missing from himself as he peers at the pieces of fruit pressed into the frosting. “Bout’ the bottle…” He gestures over to the champagne bottle, still sealed. “Just pop it open.” 

You nod, rising off the bed as you take the champagne bottle by the neck, picking off some of the gold foil around the tip with your fingernail. While you pick it off, it seems that Scourge has some things to share with you.

“When my birthday used ta’ roll around back then, my old man never bothered to celebrate it.” Scourge says softly, slowly cutting a small piece off his cake slice, and watching the frosting smear onto the plate. “Used to just leave me some gift I didn’t care about. Left it by my bedside so I would see it when I woke up.” His eyes flick toward the champagne glass you’re filling for him, hearing the small fizzing emitting from the glass. “Didn’t even bother to come give it to me himself.”

Scourge never says much about his past, preferring to keep it hidden and locked away inside himself. You’ve never pushed him to tell you anything pertaining to it. Of course he tells you the important things, whether it be his past relationships or his scuffles with Sonic, but if he wanted to hide it, of course, you would respect that. But you never expected him to talk about when he was a child…

“It was always somethin’ expensive, but there was no real thought put in it.” He prods at the piece, before stabbing it onto the piece of cutlery. “I mean yeah, sure, jewels are nice, huh?” He looks over at you expectantly, and you take the bubbling champagne glass in your hand, sitting next to him. ”But when I was younger, I didn’t want any sorta jewel or whatever he put there.” His voice softened as his next words poured out, and he finally put the piece up to his mouth before speaking.

“I wanted my dad." Scourge is quick to interrupt the immediate silence that follows after. "‘Least I got somethin’ huh? Can't say that for other kids.”

Even after that, the silence between you two lingers longer than you would have wanted it to; slowly the growing tears welling up in the corners of your eyes threaten to spill out, but you pass the glass to him as nonchalantly as you could once he finishes his thought. Scourge after chewing his piece of cake takes a sip mindlessly after being given the glass, and licks his lips right after, a small yet toothy smile growing on him. “Man, this stuff's good! Must’ve gotten that real expensive stuff for tonight, huh?” He meets your gaze properly, seeing the tears well up in your eyes as you try to wipe them away without mention, and he puts his glass down wordlessly, reaching over to wipe the tears away for you.

Oddly enough, a grin grows on his face as he cups your cheeks, clearly amused by something. Is it your anguished expression? Ah, does he find that funny?

“Whatcha’ bein’ so sad for? S’ in the past for a reason, babe.” His thumb and forefinger pinches into your cheeks, pulling on them. Your eyes squeeze shut on the assault on your face, feeling more tears roll down your cheeks, and wincing as he chuckles. “Shit, I mean, it’s my birthday. You really gonna be sad today? C’mon.” Scourge finally lets go after some time, wiping your tears away from your cheeks. “Plus, the cake’s good. The hell you cryin’ about?” You giggle at his stupid reasoning of cheering you up, wiping another stray tear away with your finger.

It’s not like he’ll ever say it vocally, but Scourge really does care, and has such a nice heart.

Bringing your champagne glass up, you clink it against his wordlessly and take a sip, feeling the bubbling alcohol run down your throat, but it doesn’t feel as harsh as it normally would. Especially in this moment.

“Well shit, happy birthday to me, yeah?" Damn right.

[pico-digital-studios]

Into, Across and Beyond! Cast: Nitro/Christopher Smith

Replaces: Insomniac Spider-Man

(Art by BroadwayBash123)

"Since I'm following in my hero's footsteps, I know there's still a lot to learn, even after I've gotten past my depression and fought off all sorts of multiversal-threatening creeps. But one thing's for sure; no matter what happens, I'll always have my friends there by my side!"

Nitro the Hedgehog/Christopher Smith is my own original character based within his own Sonic universe. However, his journey didn't solely start there.

In his youth, he was an actual human, just like you and me. He had a great life going for him; a great education, a loving family, fun friends to hang out with, and even a girlfriend! However, after he got separated from his family in a heartless attack, he ended up in Mobius, where he was found and taken in by Tails and Cosmo.

As the days went on, he aspired to be a hero of his own to help others where he couldn't help his family, which was helped with training from both Sonic and Honey. During this time, he also fell in love with Amy Rose, who reciprocated his feelings sometime after that universe's War for Mobius.

One monster that gave him the worst trouble, though, was Toxinfect, who terrorised Nitro at every opportunity and tried everything to make his life a living hell, even causing a two-month-long apocalypse with him as one of the remaining survivors.

He did manage to turn things around, though, when he discovered a special artefact known as the Sacred Ring, which was way more powerful than Toxinfect and reversed all the damage he did, therefore kickstarting the monster's downfall and descent into pure insanity.

As the next years went on, Nitro met other heroes from a variety of universes and made good friends with them. His siblings, Evo and Rosie, alongside his human girlfriend, Amelia Walten, and mother, Susan, even returned to him over that amount of time. He even gained the ability to switch between his hedgehog and human selves at any time following his first trip outside of Mobius in a while.

But during that time, Nitro was hiding the fact he was suffering from long-term depression, which he finally revealed when a smaller "version" of him from another universe pressed him about the matter. It took a lot of therapy and support for him to overcome it, but he was able to do so in time for a surprise birthday party his friends and family had prepared for him, which he was overjoyed about.

Come More than One Universe, and he, alongside his Errorverse companions (including those from Sonic, Freedom Planet, Undertale, FNF and DDLC), were brought in to help put a stop to the madness going on within the OMT universe.

During his time there, Nitro got to know more about the Blur Gang, even offering to teach CU!Sonia some tricks on how to save the day without getting her hurt. He even got to meet his D-Sides counterpart, Hefty the Armadillo. Alongside them, he helped with curing the high level of multiversal threats that were flocking in.

After everything was said and done, he joined the Blur Gang as its official twelfth member, and even outside of it, he, OMT!Tails and OMT!Mina have since been known to work in a three-member team of their own whenever they can.

I'd say it's a pretty ironic inversion of Insomniac, in a way. While Insomniac Spidey came from a video game and knows it, Nitro's self-awareness comes from being a part-human within the Sonic world.

He's also one of those to have made it through the Errorverse's rewrite with all of his memories intact, allowing him and Amelia to change things up when the times were right. And because of it, their universe became better than it once did, while they continued to lend their support to the Blur Gang as needed.

In terms of romantic relationships, he's got Amy, Amelia Walten and his version of Mina, though he's also found a preference for women older than him to actively avoid any squicky stuff, hence why he's comfortable being around ladies such as Milly in the stories.

Oh, yeah! You guys are welcome to ask me anything you'd like about Nitro, even if it's unrelated to Into, Across and Beyond!. Be it his childhood friends, about his family and other original character companions, etc.

[thisselflovecamebacktome]

My top five albums of 2022.

So I’ve decided to take my chances and post this list despite knowing that a certain blondie could still surprise release something near her birthday (looks Evermore’s way after it missing out on being on my 2020 list due to this). But jokes aside, I’ve really enjoyed this year’s music and making this list was no easy task for me, so without further adieu, here are my top five albums of the year:

5. The Loneliest Time by Carly Rae Jepsen

Dedicated was the album that got me into Carly’s music, so I was both excited and terrified of The Loneliest Time coming out. Anyone who knows me often knows that the project after a beloved one from an artist often leaves me disappointed. Carly did anything but. From the minute I heard Western Wind and Beach House, I knew I was going to love this album. It’s fun, it’s emotional, it’s introspective and it’s narratively cohesive. Mix that with it being my vibe sonically and Carly really could not have gone wrong. The collaboration with Rufus feels like it added to the song and album as a whole, which is something I often complain about other collaborations not doing and as a whole, every song feels like it belongs and that the album would be worse off without it. Ultimately it is currently rivalling Dedicated as my favourite Carly project and I cannot wait to see her for the first time next March and hear these songs live.

Favourite Song: Go Find Yourself Or Whatever (but Western Wind is a close second)

4. Dawn FM by The Weeknd

Listen, realistically I don’t have much to say about this. Abel doesn’t miss and I would argue that he is the greatest male artist of our time. Dawn FM just highlights that, as does his other work. Musically, Dawn FM remains very in Abel’s style while still remaining fresh. It also has the strengthened introspection that I would argue Abel has been perfecting over his last few projects. It, like everything else on this album, is also very narratively cohesive which I appreciate. While I understand After Hours fans who weren’t thrilled that this album came at the cost of the tour, I highly respect Abel for trusting his gut and following his musical intuition to pursue this project. Much like I have noted that that is a trait that has helped Taylor Swift become the greatest female artist of our generation (in my opinion, also because I know someone will say it, Beyonce has been around long enough that I do not consider her just ‘of our generation’) the same can absolutely be said about Abel in terms of being my pick for the best male artist of our time. Regardless, the album is incredible and as always, I am excited to see what comes next.

Favourite Song: Out Of Time

3. Humble Quest by Maren Morris

This album was my ‘grower, not shower’ pick for this list. The first time I listened to it, I left with the impression of “eh, it’s okay, more cohesive than Girl but not as good as Hero” and for a while, only listened to Background Music, Nervous and Detour. But upon the second listen of the whole album, something clicked and I have loved it more and more with each listen. It’s sweet, it’s humorous and it’s comforting all at once. Out of all the albums on this list, this is probably the one I’ve listened to most purely because its calming effect has been perfect to listen to while alone, whether that be while reading, writing, cleaning or even just sitting there in my own peace (whatever little of it I could find lmao). Whatever comes next, Maren will have big shoes to fill trying to match this album for me.

Favourite Song: Background Music

2. Holy Fvck by Demi Lovato

Is anyone surprised to see this here? Like I joke about artists writing songs/albums for me, but as a recovering addict who loves rock music and had a shitty year, this album really was written for me. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, from the minute I heard “Demi leaves rehab again!” I got “I woke up from the dead, I do it all the time” vibes, and with Reputation being my second favourite Taylor album of all time, I knew I was in for a treat then. This album was by far the one I related to most out of this list, to the point of crying several times upon my first listen (I rarely cry to music for reference). It came at the perfect time for me and really just highlighted everything I’ve loved about Demi’s music since the late 2000s. My only disappointment with this album is that I will never hear it (or Demi as a whole) live given their announcement to stop touring, but even then, I full heartedly respect their choice to focus on their health and know it’s for the best. Needless to say though, I cannot wait for their next project.

Favourite Song: Happy Ending

1. The Gods We Can Touch by Aurora

Every year I have an artist I hadn’t/had rarely listened to before take my breath away and make my top five. This year it is Aurora. Before 2022, the only song I had only listened to with Aurora taking part in it was Into The Unknown. Despite years of wanting to check her out, I never found the chance, but figured this album would be a good opportunity/place to start because everyone was listening to it for the first time at the same time. And I’m so glad I did. As a whole, Aurora musically reminds me of Kate Bush and Kate Miller-Heidke (my favourite artist of all time),especially on this album, and I cannot vocalise what a compliment that is. Though I have since gone back and enjoyed her previous work and artistry, there is something about this album that moves me in a way that I rarely have been. It’s thematical, it’s raw, it’s honest and honestly? It’s holy. I cannot tell you all how excited I am not only to see what comes next but to see this album come to life next year (I am also humbly bragging that I have front row tickets while saying that, something that is a first for any artist for me). If you have not had a chance to listen to the album or Aurora as a whole, I implore that you do so as soon as possible. You won’t be disappointment.

Favourite Song: This Could Be A Dream

[solalunar-eclipse]

A Gift To Remember

Summary: Shadow receives a gift for his birthday that causes a series of very interesting (and often cute) events.

Word count: about 7500 words

Author’s Note: I didn’t realize today was Shadow’s birthday! At the moment I’m more than a little confused because the release dates for SA2 say everything from the 18th to the 23rd, but this seems to be the one, so here this is!

Also, to that one anon whose question about this fic I never quite managed to answer- sorry about that and I do hope you’re still here to read this!

...

The main room of Team Dark’s home was, on a normal day, at least somewhat clean- which was in and of itself surprising, considering the fact that three teenagers lived there. (It was, of course, slightly less surprising when it was noted that one of these teenagers was a giant robot, one was already a businesswoman, and one had grown up in an incredibly clean environment.)

At the moment, however, said room was currently rather less clean, instead covered in various colorful signs, streamers, balloons, and other such decorations. After all, today was a very special day.

When Shadow and Rouge had discovered they shared a birthday (or creation day for Shadow, technically), they both became infinitely more determined to celebrate it for the other’s sake. This had actually, interestingly enough, also ended up making them enjoy their own festivities more than they had in quite some time.

Omega, meanwhile, had officially decided that this was his favorite day of the year.

Over the past few days, Rouge had already received a few presents from various people she knew in the line of clothes, makeup, or jewelry- but as much as she loved gems, her favorites so far were definitely the ones Omega and Shadow had gotten for her: a laser cutter that could slice through anything and a pair of (stylish) infrared goggles, respectively.

Shadow had just opened his present from Omega, which happened to be a sword that looked very cool...but was also longer than his actual body. This wasn’t actually as big of a problem for him as might be expected, as he’d gotten used to handling weapons several times his size during the alien invasion a little while back. 

He had, however, been told rather quickly by Rouge to put it away ‘before you slice the wall in half, this place does cost money, you know!’.

Next, Rouge placed her present in his hands, but at first all Shadow could do was just stare at it. This was likely because the gift wasn’t actually wrapped, but instead consisted of a box made of wood slats and filled, oddly enough, with paper shavings. There were quite a few ribbons on it, though, in an attempt to make up for the lack of other decorations.

“I couldn’t wrap it, or else the present wouldn’t have worked.” she explained, sitting back down to watch him open it.

After prying off the top and shifting aside some of the paper pieces, the hedgehog froze.

Inside, there sat a single white chao egg.

Carefully lifting the egg out of the box, Shadow held it gingerly, as though he were afraid it might try to bite him if he wasn’t gentle enough.

“Rouge…” he began nervously. “Don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate this, but...are you sure I’m the best person to be taking care of a chao?”

“Of course, hon!” she said. “You’ve taken care of them before, haven’t you?”

“Yes, but…” Shadow protested, “...are you sure I’ll be able to do as well at home? The garden is their natural habitat…”

Omega folded his arms. “YOU ARE THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM. OF COURSE YOU CAN RAISE A CHAO.”

“That’s right!” Rouge added. “The chao are always happy when you take care of them- this time isn’t going to be any different.”

“…I suppose so.” Shadow conceded, taking a deep breath. He began to rock the egg slowly from side to side. “Here we go-”

A crack appeared across the pristine white surface. The split spread rapidly while Shadow sat and watched, making sure not to move the egg about much. Chao had to hatch their eggs on their own- it was the way they first began to strengthen themselves. 

Rouge laughed. “See? You know exactly what you’re doing!”

Shadow studiously ignored her and continued to focus on the egg. Then, suddenly, a chirp came from inside and the whole top half came flying off.

The hybrid looked at his newborn chao...and his heart (though he’d never admit it) immediately melted. Soft, big eyes gazed up at him, an overjoyed smile on the creature’s face. It cooed happily upon seeing him give a small smile back, and he reached out and began to gently pat its head.

The chao broke into an even wider smile as its eyes closed blissfully, the little sphere above its head popping into a heart. Shadow continued to pet it, offering gentle words of praise, and might have continued like that for the next ten minutes had a camera noise from Omega not made him look up in alarm.

“ADDING IMAGE TO FILE: SHADOW BEING SOFT.” he declared, while Rouge looked on with a giant grin.

“You will do nothing of the sort-” Shadow growled, jumping to his feet, before a soft whimper from his chao stopped him. Its eyes were watery, wide and distressed, and the hybrid immediately scooped it up in his arms, holding it close. It relaxed quickly, snuggling into his chest fluff, and he shot Omega one last semi-serious glower before turning his attention back to the newborn.

Omega promptly took another picture.

…

Later that day, at the party that all of their friends had thrown for them, the chao and Shadow were nearly inseparable. It tended to rest in his lap when he was sitting or rode in between his ears whenever he stood up to get something. Eventually, though, the excitement of a new environment overwhelmed its initial nervousness, which unfortunately led to Shadow returning from the dining room with his hands full of plates of food to discover his chao crawling along the precarious edge of a bookshelf.

Suddenly, the chao’s footing slipped, and Shadow froze, unable to move or do anything- but then Sonic of all people noticed and was already there, leaping up and catching the chao before resting it snugly in his arms. “Looks like someone’s already progressed to the giving-their-owner-a-heart-attack stage, hm?” he asked, smirking at the little creature.

“Thank you.” Shadow said as his chao was returned to him, trying very hard to ignore the way his hands and Sonic’s brushed in the process.

(He’d been nursing a bit of a crush on the hero for a while now, but had decided to ignore it until it wore off. Sonic had admirers from all across the globe vying for his attention- it was absurd to think that anything could happen between them.)

…

Over the coming weeks, all three members of Team Dark made sure to rework their schedules so that someone was always home to watch over the chao- no more climbing on bookcases for the little one now. Shadow did most of the caretaking, feeding, training, cleaning, and providing Chaos Drives (mostly green) to the chao. Rouge did, however, occasionally claim she could ‘handle the extra work’ to give him some spare time and Omega even took it upon himself to watch it every so often.

Sometimes, Shadow and his chao would even cook together in the kitchen (a hobby he’d discovered he enjoyed after finding out that Rouge tended to eat takeout all the time- “You can’t live off that day in and day out- you’re not me, Rouge!”). The sight of a tiny pale blue creature determinedly lifting a bag of flour and flying it across the room was awfully cute- especially after Shadow bought it a tiny apron in what he unconvincingly claimed was an accidental purchase. 

Shadow never made accidental purchases.

As much as the hybrid took care of it, though, the chao also seemed to be helping him. He smiled more, glowered less, and generally seemed more tolerant of mistakes than he had been in the past. Nowadays, errors that would once have caused him to go off on a rant or huff about were now met with a calmer ‘it’s okay’ or an offer for help fixing it.

He often laid a hand on it in his sleep or curled around it protectively, and could easily be seen patting its head, carrying it around, or even- when he thought he was alone- nuzzling it gently. The amount of time and care he put into making sure that his chao was happy would have been astonishing to anyone who hadn’t already seen how much he cared about his friends.

It was no surprise then that, before long, Rouge and Omega woke up one morning to find the chao inside a cocoon (and also a very stressed-out Shadow).

The hedgehog promptly called in sick for the entire week- an incredible occurrence for him. He’d originally sworn that since he couldn’t get ill, he’d give his sick days to others when they needed it, but now that was all out the window. He wanted nothing more than to stay home and essentially sit and stare at the cocoon until it hatched.

While the two other members of Team Dark managed to convince him to eat, sleep, and do chores on regular intervals, whenever Shadow had a spare moment he’d stay in his room, watching and waiting. Their friends got so worried that Rouge and Omega had used everything in their power to coax him out of the house twice over those five days, but he refused to do any more. Even then his outings had to come with the promise that they’d both stay home, check it every five minutes, and call him the absolute moment something happened.

On the sixth day of waiting, the cocoon began to hatch while Shadow was attempting to discreetly read out loud to the chao from one of his favorite books. The moment he saw the split, he dropped the novel, jumped up, and shouted louder than he had in months- “Rouge! Omega! It’s HAPPENING!”

He hovered so closely around the cocoon that Omega had to physically pull him back as Rouge reminded him to give the chao more space. Within moments, the split had widened enough for a single black paw to poke out, feeling around carefully for some sort of purchase to pull itself the rest of the way outside. Soon enough, it had succeeded, earning- impressively enough- widened eyes from Omega and a gasp from both Shadow and Rouge.

Frowning light blue eyes were set in an equally grumpy (albeit adorable) face, with two little black ears and three tiny quills on the chao’s head. The ears and quills both had red stripes, as did the arms, legs, and even its tail. A red crescent shape sat on its chest, and two tiny purple bat wings flapped slowly behind it.

In short, it looked a lot like a tiny Shadow.

The hedgehog in question reached out carefully and began to pet his chao, offering some quiet words of praise, but before long it flew up and settled in its favorite spot in between his ears. When Shadow turned around to face his friends, they were met with the sight of a little glowering creature settled on top of his head…which really did look far too similar to the hybrid himself when he was irritated. 

Rouge covered a smile with both of her hands. “Shadow...hon…”

He frowned at her, only serving to make the resemblance more obvious. “What?”

“It looks exactly like you!”

“Not really- it has blue eyes and...bat wings…” He looked up at her suddenly. “Rouge...how much time have you been spending with Spark again?”

“Oh, just a little- wait, Spark?” she said quickly, redirecting his attention.

Shadow flushed a bright green at that. “I might’ve already picked out a name...does it sound alright?” he asked, studiously looking anywhere but at his friends.

The chao chirped at the name and snuggled a little further into the fur on his head, seemingly pleased with the title. 

He began to smile at that. “You like that name, do you?” he asked teasingly.

“It sure looks like it! I think it’s a lovely name, hon.” Rouge added.

The chao cooed, cementing its name with all of the team (whether Omega would admit it or not).

Now, if anything, Shadow and his chao were even more close than before. Rouge even bought it a tiny leather jacket to match his style, which was quickly deemed by everyone (especially their friends, to whom she’d sent about fifty photos) the most adorable thing ever. 

...

One day, Shadow came home from lunch out with Silver and Blaze only to discover a quite unexpected scene- though he really should have seen it coming, considering what he’d noticed after his chao had hatched. Rouge was kneeling next to the sofa, scratching Spark behind the ears and saying in what could only be described as a baby voice, “Who’s your favorite momma? Me, that’s right. That’s right, isn’t it?”

“Uh….” he interrupted, feeling more than a little uncertain as to how to respond to this. He was torn between “I didn’t know you had a baby voice” and “I’m glad to see you and Spark getting along” and wasn’t entirely sure which one to go with here.

The bat, on the other hand, jumped a good three feet in the air at the sound before glaring at Shadow furiously. “Don’t startle me like that!” she shouted, more than a little tense...and also a bit worried?

The hybrid didn’t react, instead saying “It’s nice to see you spending time with Spark too, Rouge.” with a smile. 

She relaxed a little at that, and Shadow sighed. “Rouge, I wouldn’t make fun of you- I do the same kind of thing, don’t I?”

“You’re right, you’re right.” the bat admitted. “I just had to! It looks like me- it even has my wings! How could I not?”

Shadow moved to sit down on the sofa at that, reaching out to pat the chao as well. Rouge smiled at him gratefully, and then they both looked down at the cute creature in between them, who was promptly staring up at both with a confused look on its face. After a moment, though, it seemed to realize that everything was alright and nuzzled both Mobians before curling up on the couch happily.

…

Another time, the entire team was out grocery shopping at their favorite store when Spark’s eye was caught by the soft, warm cinnamon buns sitting behind a glass case. After a minute or two of desperate pulling at the seams- to no avail- it flew over to Shadow and began to poke at his shoulder until he turned to look at it.

“Yes? What is it?” he asked, giving the chao a little scratch under the chin.

The chao pointed excitedly at the sweet treats, but its expression melted into one of dismay upon hearing him say “No, Spark, that’s not very good for you- and it’s too big for you to finish all by yourself, too.”

It mimed a clock insistently- they didn’t go to the store that often, after all- its frown deepening all the while. Shadow felt a little uncertain- he enjoyed giving the chao treats, but was now really the best time to feed it so much sugar? It could end up flying all over the place, and he really didn’t feel like getting banned from yet another grocery store. (The last one had been because Omega got a little too excited while messing around with the shopping cart and had melted it and twisted it into a knot...somehow. They were rapidly escorted out after that.)

Suddenly, though, the chao shuffled forward, took one of his fingers in between its tiny paws, and stared up at him with the softest, most pleading look it could possibly manage, its eyes wide and mouth quivering. “No...no, come on…” Shadow protested weakly, but already his resistance was melting away. It practically seemed to be saying haven’t I been good all week? Can’t I please just have this one treat? and the hybrid was in no condition to fight back.

Within moments, Spark was holding a cinnamon roll and dug into it with glee, only pausing once to nuzzle Shadow happily and offer him a quick bite as thanks. He accepted the gesture of appreciation easily (even though now his face had sugar on it after the chao’s affectionate thank-you) and was more than happy to see his chao smiling broadly with the treat in its hands.

…

The chao was, of course, still a great help to Shadow as well. One night in particular, it woke up to the sounds of quiet whimpering and began to look around, startled. For a moment, it turned to its caretaker for help- and then discovered that he was the one in trouble.

Shadow was curled up on his side, his brow creased in distress and his whole body shaking terribly. His eyes were squeezed tightly shut and occasionally the most terribly saddening sounds would escape his mouth. Once or twice, a tear escaped and trickled down his face.

Spark crawled up to his face gently, licking away the tear and nuzzling his cheek. Shadow shuddered briefly, but seemed to relax almost infinitesimally when the dark chao pressed itself against his chest for a moment. Eventually, the creature managed to get him to roll onto his back, at which point it crawled onto his chest, hoping that this would help him begin to relax.

It really did work- within moments, the small, warm weight on his chest made Shadow’s breathing even out and his shivers ease as the nightmare that was plaguing him began to fade.

Spark curled up, pleased with itself, and fell back asleep not long after.

…

There was just one problem amongst all this newly-discovered happiness that came with the chao. Ever since it had evolved out of its cocoon, Omega seemed as though he were hardly willing to interact with it.

Rouge or Shadow would hand it over to him, only to get it back less than a minute later. He spent the least amount of time with it out of the three, but when he was asked if he didn’t like the chao, he never said as much. 

Omega didn’t tend to lie...but then why wouldn’t he do anything with it?

Once or twice, they’d caught him merely staring at Spark as the little creature sat on the couch, his optics clicking but otherwise utterly silent. The two Mobians hardly knew what to make of it- he’d never acted like this before.

They finally had the opportunity to discover why he was behaving strangely several days later, though, entirely due to an accident on Shadow’s part. Rouge and Omega had been answering a distress call regarding some rogue G.U.N. robots and needed to call in the hybrid to help. He’d driven his motorbike directly to the scene and leapt straight into battle…

...and hadn’t noticed Spark peeking out of the bag he’d left on his bike.

The chao- while fast, to be sure- was in no way prepared for a full-on battle. While at first it had hoped to help its little family, flying about uncertainly in hopes of doing something, it quickly discovered that the only thing it could really do was to hide behind an upended concrete slab and hope it wasn’t noticed.

That, unfortunately, didn’t quite work out.

It didn’t take long before one of the rogue drones spotted a fourth heat signature aside from the three it was fighting and began to stalk towards it, charging its laser cannon in the process. Shadow, confused at first, felt his stomach drop in horror upon seeing his tiny chao shaking in fear as the machine advanced on its hiding spot. He hadn’t thought to bring a Chaos Emerald, believing this would be an easy battle- and Rouge was busy in the air.

The laser cannon on the drone was almost fully charged, and Shadow fired up his skates in a futile attempt to somehow reach Spark before-

A white hot blast lit up the area.

Shadow couldn’t have stopped the strangled cry that came from his mouth if he had wanted to. The smoke began to clear, and he almost couldn’t look…

Something stirred within the haze, and as it cleared away, Shadow felt his whole body sag with relief upon seeing Omega shifting to an upright position from where he’d shielded the chao with the back of his chassis, blocking the full force of the laser. He let out a sigh as he caught a glimpse of Spark held safely in Omega’s hand as the other one retracted to reveal a flamethrower.

“MY TURN.”

Within moments, the drone was just so much melted slag on the floor and the battle’s tide was turned. Shadow and Rouge dispatched the other robots and then rushed to Omega, who had held onto the chao this entire time.

“Omega...thank you.” Shadow said, taking Spark from his friend and holding it tightly.

“IT WAS- zzzt- NOTHING.” Omega said, a sudden staticky buzz splitting his sentence in two.

“Omega?” Rouge asked, her eyes narrowing. “What happened to you?”

“NOTHING.” he said hurriedly, his voice still glitching. “WAIT- DON’T YOU D-DARE-”

The three had already begun looking to see what had happened...but then froze when they saw the damage his back panel had taken while shielding Spark from the blast. A giant, smoking hole of warped and fused metal was burned into his chassis, revealing a bunch of melted and sparking wiring that definitely needed urgent attention.

“Omega…” Shadow looked horrified.

Rouge frowned, confused. “Why would you do this to yourself? I know how much you hate having to go get repairs.”

The robot let out a burst of static that sounded almost like a resigned sigh. Turning around, he muttered, “IT’S LI-LITERALLY YOU. AND ROUGE. BUT TINY. THAT APPEARS TO HAVE… STRANGE EFFECTS- zzzt- ON MY BEHAVIOR.”

“Do you...not like those effects?” Rouge asked, now clearly shifting into ‘I’m figuring things out’ mode. “Is that why you’ve been avoiding it so often?”

“I AM A ROBOT OF MASS DESTRUCTION. I AM NOT SUPPOSED TO CARE FOR TINY CREATURES SUCH AS THIS ONE. I SHOULD NOT FEEL ANY ‘WORRY’ ABOUT IT- AND YET-” Omega cut off there with a frustrated crackle.

Shadow still didn’t understand. “You’ve always been a robot of mass destruction, but you never thought it was weird to worry about us before.”

“THAT WAS DIFFERENT!” Omega insisted. “YOU BOTH ARE POWERFUL. IT IS NATURAL THAT RESPECT AND CONSEQUENTLY OTHER THINGS SHOULD COME FROM THAT. BUT THIS-! IT HAS NO DESTRUCTIVE QUALITIES! BUT STILL I...YOU KNOW...”

“It’s official, Omega.” Rouge said at that, a smirk growing on her face. “You’re becoming more and more like us...organics are always weak for cute things.”

“IT IS SHAMEFUL THAT I SHOULD COME TO THIS.” he grumbled.

“It’s not so bad, really.” Shadow said, placing a hand on his arm.

“And that’s coming from the guy who never used to admit he cares about people!” Rouge insisted. “Omega, you know you don’t have to be embarrassed about that kind of thing here- you’d never make fun of Shadow for not being tough all the time, would you?”

“I GUESS NOT…” he said, still seeming irritated.

At this point, Spark flew up to sit in Omega’s hand, looking up at the robot with its little frowning face, before reaching out and patting a single finger solemnly with its paw.

“OH NO.”

“Oh yes.” Rouge answered, grinning. “Let’s get you to Tails now though, okay? Then once you’re fixed up you can come home and pet the chao.”

Omega turned his head away and refused to dignify that with a response.

(He did, however, pet the chao when he got home. Nobody teased him about it, for which- while he’d never say it- he was rather grateful.)

…

It was inevitable, eventually, that Team Dark’s schedule wouldn’t be perfect and that they’d all have to be out and busy at some point. This, of course, meant that Spark would have to be dropped off at the chao daycare. 

Shadow had managed to force himself to reconcile with that fact, but the chao wasn’t nearly as good at that sort of thing.

On the day of, it was sobbing desperately, clinging to Shadow’s jacket with a tight grip as though it’d been handed a horrible punishment instead of a day spent at the warm, welcoming building in front of it. “It’s going to be alright. You’ll be okay, it’s just for a day. See, the Mobians who run it are very nice- won’t you look?” the hybrid whispered in a soothing voice, gently rubbing Spark’s head.

Omega stepped forward. “DON’T YOU...WANT TO SHOW HOW BRAVE YOU CAN BE?” he said awkwardly. Talking to the chao was still taking some getting used to for him, but he was definitely trying his best.

Rouge smiled warmly at that. “Of course! We’ll all be so proud of you, don’t you know that?”

“We can make a cake especially for you when you get home too, alright?” Shadow said, and that was the final thing the chao needed to hear. Wiping its eyes with a final few sniffles, it flew over to the little walkway towards the entrance and stood up tall, its body shaking slightly with leftover stress and its attempts not to cry.

“We love you!” Rouge called, blowing it a quick kiss.

“See you soon.” Shadow said gently, waving with a smile.

“YOU’LL BE THE BEST ONE THERE.” Omega added, shuffling in place a little.

The chao whimpered briefly, but then turned away and bounded into the daycare before it could lose its nerve. 

Throughout the morning, it remained relatively antisocial- a bit like the hedgehog whose appearance it had taken- during the music and karate lessons. The other chao all babbled and played together, being mostly neutral and hero-types, and the few dark chao that were there wanted to cause an awful lot more trouble than Spark was in the mood for.

One thing that it noticed very clearly, though, was the extraordinarily frustrating presence of a royal blue hero and speed-type chao.

This chao didn’t seem to think even once (let alone twice) about anything it did. It banged on the drums until Spark’s ears were sore during music class and then somehow managed to smack it in the face during karate lessons twice, and all the while it chatted away with about five other chao all around it.

Needless to say, by midday, when it was playtime, Spark had just about had enough.

When the blue chao rushed directly through the little sand city that it had been carefully building, swiping everything away with a single dash, Spark growled, picked up the plastic shovel it had been playing with, and threw it so hard it whacked the other creature in the arm.

Snarling, it began to stomp off when it felt a hand on its shoulder. The blue chao darted away and began hurriedly to try and rebuild the city, occasionally glancing up at Spark with an apologetic expression in its eyes.

It...looked awfully sad, actually.

Suddenly, the dark chao remembered how it had quickly stopped banging on the drums when the teacher had told it to, and how it had looked rather guilty when it had smacked Spark in the face, and how excited it was when talking with the other chao…

Maybe it was just a little clumsy sometimes.

Spark sighed a little. The other meant well, it decided, as its anger began to fade. It appreciated the apology...but now the sculptures were gone and it couldn’t get them back. Then, though, its gaze fell upon a pair of toy cars sitting nearby. 

Pulling the blue chao over to a strip of flat, packed earth nearby, it gave one car to its surprised companion and then set its own down at a line that could work quite well as the start of a race.

Soon enough, the other creature worked out the idea and began to cheer with delight, and before long they were racing cars like they’d been friends since the start. Eventually, they even switched to running races themselves, over and over again until they were all worn out and collapsed on the cool grass in a heap. Before long, though, they were up and at it again, only this time they started with a building game, and then had a little fun with the musical instruments, and soon enough Spark couldn’t help but wonder how they had ever fought in the first place.

Eventually, they decided that their next activity would be a race to the top of the jungle gym they noticed nearby. Spark was determined not to lose as it scrambled up the bars. It pulled itself paw over paw up the structure, getting closer and closer to the top, until-

Suddenly, a bar that it had been sure existed in front of it only a moment ago was now clearly just a little too far away, and the mistake caused it to reel forward, desperately clinging to the slippery bar it sat on. It twisted head over heels until it slid and fell all the way back to the ground, the wind slammed forcefully out of its little lungs.

Spark gasped soundlessly, trying and failing to pull air back into itself. After several agonizing seconds, it finally caught its breath- and then nearly got it knocked back out again by the impact of its new friend.

Regaining focus, the dark chao realized with a start that its friend was practically wailing into its chest, the soft blue creature shaking with desperate, panicked sobs. It looked up quickly, its eyes swollen and teary, and then reached out with its paws and hurriedly patted Spark’s body down, as though to reassure itself that the dark chao was still there. 

The creature in question sat up and pulled its friend into a tight hug, feeling nothing less than awful as the blue chao sniffled and whimpered worriedly in its arms. Eventually, it managed to calm down enough to amble over to a small nest made of blankets especially for tired chao and lay down there next to Spark. The two chao curled up together, nuzzling gently as the shaky breaths of the blue one finally evened out.

Spark felt the little ball over its head pop into a heart shape, and noticed briefly that its friend had done the same. They remained curled up like that for the last half-hour or so of their time in the daycare, alternately simply cuddling or talking about their respective owners.

Spark hoped they’d get to spend more time with this friend of theirs soon.

…

Shadow pulled up to the daycare on his motorcycle at closing time, doing his best to smooth out his frazzled quills. It wouldn’t be very good to let his chao know that he’d been nearly as worried about it as it had felt itself. 

He sighed, making his way towards the entrance of the building- and instantly felt the last wisps of his composure vanish upon seeing Sonic standing just inside. Before he could panic and flee the area at top speed, his legs (which didn’t seem to have received the message just yet) carried him through the door and inside.

Almost immediately, the blue hedgehog turned to face him with a bright smile. “Oh! Hey, Shadow!” Sonic said happily. “I didn’t know you brought your chao here, too! I’ve gotta say hi to the little guy again sometime!”

“This is my first time bringing it here. If it’s alright with that…I suppose you may.” the hybrid said, trying his best to sound coherent and cool (but actually just seeming stiff and awkward).

They talked for a little while as they waited for their chao to come out, chatting about their lives and friends. More than once, Shadow had to pinch himself in order to stay focused. His mind kept threatening to wander off into dreamland when he was around the hero, ready to admire his many great qualities (and wonderful appearance) at the drop of a hat.

Eventually, though, he became a bit worried by the fact that chao after chao were wandering out through the playroom door, being collected, and leaving…but neither Spark nor Sonic’s chao had even showed up. Soon enough, the two decided to walk into the room and find their tiny charges themselves.

“Uh, hi, mixter!” Sonic greeted the leopard who ran the daycare. “Didja see my lil’ buddy somewhere around here?”

“Oh, hello Sonic!” they said brightly- clearly the hero had been to this place quite a few times before. “Yes, your chao is over there in that nest there, sorry. I just hated to disturb those two…”

Shadow frowned. Those two?

His question was promptly answered when Sonic whisked aside the blanket covering the nest, only for both of them to stare at the sight inside.

Two purring chao, one clearly Sonic’s and the other obviously Shadow’s, were snuggled up together with big hearts floating over their heads. Even the hybrid’s dark chao, notorious for its ever-present frown, looked completely at peace with a small smile on its face.

He tried his best not to freak out.

“Erm…” Shadow began eloquently.

“Uh…” Sonic replied.

The two chao perked up at this, looking happily at their owners before nuzzling gently together in a manner that made Shadow’s stomach leap into his throat and then crash straight through the floor. In a further twist (both in events and in the striped hedgehog’s internal organs), Sonic’s chao then leapt happily into his arms, leaving Shadow to stare at the tiny version of his crush cuddling into his chest fur.

He sincerely hoped there was a convenient couch nearby for him to sit down on.

“Blu- come on-” Sonic began, looking oddly panicked for some reason, but then Spark sprang eagerly onto his shoulder and the hero rapidly fell silent as the dark chao nudged his cheek.

The two hedgehogs stared at each other for a long time. Shadow tried to move or do something other than just stand there, but it was awfully difficult when the hero was looking at him with those wide, soft green eyes….

“Er…Sonic?” Shadow finally choked out, in an odd, strained sort of tone.

“Yeah?”

“I think I’d like my chao back now.”

“Yeah.”

They each handed over their respective creatures, though Shadow felt rather reluctant to let such a tiny version of Sonic out of his arms. And for a moment he could almost have sworn that the hero held Spark a little longer than necessary, too…

…

Once he got home, the hybrid collapsed onto the couch and covered his eyes briefly with a hand. Spark, who had at first rushed into the kitchen (not having forgotten the promise of cake), came back and began to tug on his arm briefly before realizing that maybe Shadow wasn’t quite up to doing much of anything at the moment.

Rouge and Omega walked in just a moment later, their work having ended a little after Shadow’s. Upon seeing him slumped on the furniture, though, their greetings were cut short and instead replaced by worried questions.

Shadow sighed. “Spark...just spent a bunch of time cuddling with Sonic’s chao. And he noticed.”

“And that’s a good thing, hon.” Rouge shot back, having resisted a facepalm the moment she realized what all this was about.

“It is not!” the hedgehog cried out, before realizing that Spark was more than a little stressed by his tone of voice. “I’m not mad at you, don’t worry, it’s just...I already make enough of a fool of myself around him on my own. He’ll figure it out soon enough if we keep this up.”

“SO LET HIM.” Omega said. “EITHER HE STARTS DATING YOU OR HE’S AN IDIOT.”

Shadow blushed furiously. “It doesn’t work like that!”

“EXCEPT WHEN IT DOES.”

“Why don’t you tell him, hon?” Rouge asked. “I mean…” and here she developed a devious smile, “...didn’t his chao technically also act all affectionate with yours?”

The hybrid’s ears were bright green by now. “He’s nice to everyone, Rouge.”

At this point, Spark- who had left temporarily to get a pencil and paper- held up a drawing it had made of the scene at the jungle gym earlier. Shadow, of course, immediately began fussing over his chao, checking for any bruises or scrapes, but the bat in particular saw something entirely different.

“Kinda...reminds me of what happened on Space Colony ARK.” she mused. 

Shadow’s head shot up at that. “What?”

Rouge smirked, but it was bittersweet this time. “Your fall...it really hurt him too, y’know? He didn’t go out in public for a long time after that.”

“He...he never mentioned that to me…”

“He wouldn’t have!” she said. “Sonic isn’t the type to ‘bother’ others with his feelings.” Rouge explained, doing air quotes at one point.

“HE ALSO STARES AT YOU WHEN YOU ARE NOT LOOKING.”

“He what?!” By now Shadow had been reduced to just looking back and forth between his two friends. 

Spark flew in front of Shadow’s face and began to mime something. First pointing at Shadow, then a heart, then talking, then a hedgehog with all its quills pointed down…

“No! I can’t just tell him!”

“We’re hanging out with his team next week at the park- you should do it then.” Rouge replied, ignoring the last thing he’d just said.

“Did you not hear me, I can’t-”

“YOU WILL NEED SOMETHING NICE TO WEAR.” Omega said loudly over the rest of his sentence.

Spark cheered approvingly.

“So...you three have just decided for me whether or not I’m going to confess to Sonic.” Shadow sighed, beginning to resign himself to the fact.

“Absolutely, hon!” Rouge said brightly, slipping an arm around his shoulders.

He glowered at all three of them, but it lacked any real malice. “Alright, I’ll play along...for now.” he grumbled.

“EXCELLENT. LET THE PLANNING COMMENCE.”

…

One week later, Shadow was standing in the middle of a patch of grass, feeling like his knees were about to buckle as sweat trickled through his quills. He was no longer resigned to telling Sonic about his feelings and was in fact considering jumping into the nearby lake and hiding there for the duration of the hangout. His stomach- along with whatever scraps of resolve he may have had- were currently all the way back at their house.

On top of all that, he was frankly surprised he didn’t just spontaneously burst into flames when the other three Mobians showed up, Sonic in the lead.

“Hey guys!” he said excitedly. “Long time no see!”

Rouge snickered a bit at his catchphrase (it was one of many) but Shadow just felt his ears burn. He was just so cute and cheesy and already the hybrid’s mind was devolving into a mushy mess.

“Rouge, Omega.” he greeted them each, but he seemed to pause for a second on the last name. “...Shadow.”

The hedgehog in question thankfully managed a reply, and then the fun began in earnest. Knuckles and Shadow competed in several arm-wrestling matches with narration from Tails (“...aaaand Knuckles looks like he’s in the lead!”) and commentary from Omega (“YOU’RE LUCKY I DON’T ARM-WRESTLE OR ELSE BOTH OF YOUR ARMS WOULD BE BROKEN.”). Rouge and Sonic were busy pranking other innocent people, though once in a while the latter would look over at the competition, distracted.

Eventually, Tails and Omega got bored- which of course meant Knuckles and Shadow had to play the role of caretaker (“No, you can’t blow up trees. No, not even for ‘science’.”) for a little while.

At one point, though, Rouge got bored with the pranks and had dragged the echidna off to a park bench and was now flirting with him enough to turn his face as red as his spines. Tails had promised to behave- which now meant that he was halfheartedly attempting to convince Omega not to modify his cannon to launch ducks from the nearby pond- leaving Sonic and Shadow to themselves. Blu and Spark had been playing in the grass all this time (since both of them had brought their chao without really realizing that the other would do the same), and Shadow had very definitely not been thinking about how lucky his chao was that emotions were easy for it.

He remembered the talk his friends had given him before this outing then and wondered if maybe, just maybe, it could be that easy. Before he could stop himself, he’d already spoken.

“...Sonic?”

“Yeah?” the hero asked, turning to face Shadow.

“I...wanted to talk to you about something.” he said, regretting everything already because look how stupid he was about to seem...yet Shadow Robotnik the Hedgehog had never been one to do things by halves.

“Oh, really?” Sonic said, and now he almost looked relieved, for some reason. “I, uh, was actually hoping to do the same. That’s cool, what is it?”

“No, no, you go first.” Shadow urged him, hoping that he’d take the offer.

Unfortunately, today was not his lucky day. “No, man, you asked first! Go ahead, what was it?”

“Really- it’s fine.”

“No, you had something you wanted to say!” Sonic insisted.

“It’s okay, I swear-”

“Well, I guess-”

“I mean, if you want-”

“Okay-”

“You see-”

“I like you!”

Both hedgehogs shouted the words at the exact same time, before freezing and staring at each other.

“Wait…” Shadow began.

Sonic’s eyes were wide. “You like me back?!?” he gasped, hands flying up to his mouth.

“...yes.” he admitted, looking off to the side in embarrassment. Then it hit him. “Wait. You like me back?”

“Of course! How could I not?” Sonic asked incredulously. “You’re smart, funny, nice-” He’d begun listing off attributes while counting on his fingers, but cut himself off upon noticing Shadow’s confusion.

“Yes, but you’re a hero. The world’s hero.” Shadow began to frown, staring at the grass. “Why would you settle for someone like-”

“No.” Sonic growled, and the hybrid looked up suddenly to see his face twisted in anger. “Don’t ever say that.”

“But everyone thinks it…” Shadow protested weakly.

“Yeah, well, ‘everyone’ isn’t part of my love life.” Sonic assumed a slightly less aggressive stance, placing a hand on his hip. “Whoever’s been telling you that can either leave you alone or get their face introduced to my sneakers.”

Shadow blushed. “Nobody needed to. I just assumed...but perhaps I shouldn’t have.” he added quickly, seeing the hero begin to glower again. 

“That’s right!” he said, zipping over to stand directly in front of Shadow. “No assumptions here- talk to me from now on if something’s worryin’ you, ‘kay?”

Then, he seemed to notice the sudden stiffness in the hybrid’s posture, as well as the green flush slowly creeping up his ears. Sonic leaned forward with a smirk, resting his forearm on Shadow’s shoulder. “Thinkin’ about something?”

Shadow gulped.

For once, he decided that he could do what he wanted. So, he slowly reached up a hand and touched the peach fur on Sonic’s arm gently, like it was the most delicate thing in the world. 

Rather more quickly, Sonic turned a shade of bright red to rival Omega’s paint job.

“So, uh…” he began, his voice shaky. “Erm...do ya feel like sitting under that tree? Together?”

Shadow agreed, and the two walked over to the shady patch, sitting down and resting against each other. Soon enough, though, Sonic turned to face Shadow, a little nervous. “Do we, like, need to talk about this? Figure out...what to do about…us?” He started turning pink again.

“Maybe later. We have a lot of time, after all.” Shadow said, trying to contain the soaring feeling inside when Sonic said ‘us’- until he realized that he didn’t have to any longer.

“What’re you smiling about?”

“You. And me. Together.” Shadow said simply, making Sonic laugh and snuggle up against him, resting his head on a black-furred shoulder.

“Wow. That’s, uh….that’s new. I really like it though.”

Then, the hero looked up at him. “I really like you, too.”

At this point, a loud whistle could be heard from Rouge, who was standing not too far off and had likely heard a lot of what they’d said. Sonic just giggled, while Shadow shot her a death glare. She just winked and mouthed I’ll keep them occupied, at which point the hybrid tried not to show how very much he appreciated that and failed miserably.

And Sonic was purring now. Which of course meant that every single brain cell in Shadow’s head was promptly dead for the next five minutes.

After he’d recovered from that, Shadow wrapped his arms tightly around his...boyfriend? Maybe? He thought for a moment. “Hey, Sonic?”

“Yeah?”

“How do you feel about being my-” Shadow paused briefly to cough, trying to get the words out- “-boyfriend?”

“I think I like that a lot.”

Shadow smiled warmly, feeling the beginnings of a purr rise up in his own chest.

“I like that a lot, too. Almost as much as I like you.”

[teamxdark]

would you have any suggestions on how to write canon Rouge? First time doing it and a bit worried

I'll start by saying not to worry too much. The wonderful thing about fanworks is that people get to show their own interpretations of characters; two people can see the same scene but interpret it in two different ways, and we see fanworks that will delve into those different ways of thinking! You won't please everyone, but that's pretty standard with just about everything!

So with that in mind, I'll gladly give some tips on my understanding of Rouge and how I approach writing her.

1) Materialism and Personal Goals

When writing Rouge, definitely have her with a goal in mind. She doesn't rest on her laurels for long and is always chasing her next treasure, whether it's an actual gem or a special day out that she planned for herself. Whenever we see Rouge in canon, she's almost always after something. That's not to say she never has downtime (she goes to hang out at Sonic's birthday party in Generations with no obvious ulterior motive) but it suits her best to want something and to go out and get it.

More often than not, she wants something material. Rouge is very materialistic; she prefers things she can see and hold in her hands, and her line 'all the world's gems are mine to keep' drives home exactly what kind of treasures she wants. Rouge's obsession with gems works both as a good motive to give her, as well as a potential glimpse into her backstory and why she became who she is today!

It's also a great character flaw, because oh man, Rouge messing up a GUN mission or sidetracking when an ally needs help because she found something she decided she wants and that she wants NOW makes for some great conflict. I still think sometimes about that moment in TSR when she finds out that Dodon-Pa is a king and she refocuses her attention from any potential dangers to ask him if he has a crown that's inlaid with jewels (I wish we got an exhausted groan from Shadow in response that, I really do).

2) Temperament

Rouge is temperamental. She gets annoyed and angry and frustrated when things don't go her way. We see it in SA2 with the shattering of the Master Emerald, we see it in Heroes when she thinks the Chaotix are in her way, we see it all the time in Sonic X...

...but she's not mean. Sometimes I'll see a portrayal of her that's cold or uncaring and I (personally) disagree. We see that again in SA2 when she asks where Shadow is, despite her last conversation with him being far from pleasant. We see it in Heroes when her care for Shadow becomes apparent as she finds all the androids. We see it in 06 where she lets herself be emotionally vulnerable around her team, vocally telling them that she cares.

Rouge can be short-tempered, physical, inconsiderate, and dismissive, but she's not really mean, and that makes for some interesting choices on how to write her. It's a lot of fun to make her smug and confident until something goes wrong and she loses cool before trying to play it off!

3) She's Actually a Lot Like Sonic

I know I've said it before but Rouge and Sonic are so similar. They're pretty laid-back with how they treat people, have an air of confidence that doesn't seem forced, they're usually in pretty good control of their emotions until they lose their temper, they make a lot of light hearted jokes and comments (potentially to hide any misgivings they have), they like to one-up people, they're snarky... The really big difference between Sonic and Rouge (and honestly I can say the exact same for Knuckles and Shadow as well) is that one is more reactive while the other is more proactive. Rouge is proactive, always looking for the next thing for her to do and preventing any problems before they happen, while Sonic is reactive, where life is fine until it isn't and then he fixes the problem when it happens.

I'm not saying 'just write her like you'd write Sonic but with this one difference' but you can definitely think of how Sonic would act and see if that resonates with Rouge in the moment.

4) Don't Underestimate Her

Rouge is designed and acts like a classic Femme Fatale but do NOT underestimate her. Rouge is extremely capable, very clever, and successful. She gets a lot of logistical things done. She's a government agent and spy, so she knows a lot about people and how to get what she needs from them. Even if Rouge needs to fail in her goals, for whatever reason, do not gloss over on her planning and her execution.

Also she can lift Omega with her wings alone, and that robot weighs nearly 3000 pounds so don't underestimate her strength either! Let her fight and she will decimate her opponents.

5) She's Not That Old

I've seen people point at Rouge and say she's a Mom Friend or a Wine Aunt and I can't say I agree at all. Rouge is still young. She's 18, a teenager, and though she's much further along than your average real 18 year old, she's definitely not as experienced and mature as people seem to think.

Not to mention, the Sonic Heroes manual lists her as 17, which suggests that she was 17 when we met her in SA2 and that she stayed 17 potentially through Shadow the Hedgehog the Game, since that takes place right after Heroes! She's still young, and I don't see her having a motherly nature. She fits an older sister figure better, specifically an older sister who wants you to do well but won't do your work for you.

6) Stubbornness

Rouge refuses to admit she's wrong or that she needs help. We see this clearly in SA2 when Knuckles saves her from falling into lava.

That's not to say that she won't get people to do the things she doesn't want to do, mind you! (Because she absolutely would.) But she doesn't want to admit that she NEEDS help.

When she gets saved, she doesn't thank Knuckles. She tries to spin it so that she ends up on top and still in control. ("You just wanted to hold my hand" Rouge honey please no one's falling for that.) In fact, in their exchange there, it's KNUCKLES who apologises to HER, and with the way she smiles his way when he leaves afterwards, you can tell that means a lot to her. Rouge's way of thanking him wasn't verbal, but still no less poignant; she gave up her emerald shards (still having to claim they stink as a way to cover her tracks) but given what we know about Rouge and gems, this is a significant move.

Nothing more owed. Both on the same page. She won't say "sorry" or "thank you" but she won't leave a debt unpaid if it's to someone she respects.

(It's also that aspect of her, the one that has trouble being open and emotionally vulnerable (again like Sonic) that makes her scene with her team on the beach in 06 all the more significant for her character.)

7) Secrecy

Granted, few characters have any sort of backstory, but with Rouge, it seems kind of intentional. She focuses on the present and the future, finishing her current goal before moving along to the next, but she's not very open about her past. It might be because she doesn't think it matters, or it might be because she doesn't want to revisit it or reveal it, but it's worth making the decision between whether Rouge keeps things about herself hidden purposefully, or subconsciously.

8) She Has a Family and That's Interesting

The one piece of past-related information that we DO have about Rouge is that she has a mother (mentioned in Chronicles and TSR) so there's some room to build there! Give her a mother, some siblings, a father, a second mother, like twelve aunts and uncles... There's a lot you can do with it, and if you can make her family relevant to the story, then it's all the better of a way to reveal even more about the aspects of herself that she hides away!

9) Show Don't Tell

Rouge is the sort to show that she cares or likes someone more than say it (AGAIN MAKING THAT SCENE IN 06 SO IMPORTANT WHEN SHE SAYS THAT SHE'LL STAND BY SHADOW). A good way to show her care would be giving gifts! Given how materialistic Rouge is, her freely giving someone something without expecting something else in return (possibly with an excuse like "there's a scratch on it" to cover her tracks) is a good way of showing who is really on her good side.

10) Have Fun With Body Language

A really fun thing to do is have Rouge emote with her wings and ears! Make them droop when she's sad or disappointed! Make her ears flatten and her wings spread when she's angry or threatened! Make her fly around and do little flips when she's happy! She's a bat and there's so much to have fun with that!

11) When in Doubt...

If you feel like you're writing a character but you're not sure if it feels like Rouge, then cutscenes are your friend! Reading character analysis is one thing, but seeing her in action puts context into all of it.

But ultimately? This will be your story and your own interpretation of Rouge. This is your Rouge, so don't be afraid to just wing it (punintended)!

[inventedrecords]

Total Eclipse of My Art by Bonnie Tyler (EP - 1984)

The story of how mega-selling Welsh chanteuse, Bonnie Tyler, came to record a bizarre EP of Goth covers hinges upon the influence of Invented Records founder, Max Scratch.

This South London Svengali, equal parts Andrew Loog Oldham and Nosferatu, had a misfiring genius for pulling people into his vainglorious, chemically-driven visions and then completely fucking up their execution.

He genuinely loved nurturing leftfield talent – often willing to make a bet on the next big thing based on one gig in a dingey pub. Those bets were almost always completely wrong, as is evidenced by the continuing irrelevance of the Invented Records back-catalogue.

However disastrous his navigation of the music business, Max had two things that meant he was the most connected man in the British music scene during the 1980s: a seemingly never-ending supply of primo-grade narcotics – and copious amounts of blackmail material.

Some have described him as a gangster, but only after he disappeared whilst holidaying in Thanet during the summer of 1997.

Scratch’s base of operations during the 1980s was his Croydon nightclub, ‘Das Boot’. I’ll no doubt cover the tawdry history of this concrete sonic bunker at some point, but all you need to know for the purposes of this post is that on one star-crossed sweltering Saturday night in July 1984, Bonnie Tyler, Wayne Hussey of the Sisters of Mercy and Ian Astbury of The Cult were all sharing a booth in the Das Boot VIP lounge, hosted by the loquacious Invented Records impresario.

Tyler was an international megastar at the time, but her new single ‘Holding Out For A Hero’ was barely registered on the charts (though it would go to number 2 the following year). She was in London to promote the single, but felt it wasn’t her best work after the Wagnerian grandeur of her previous collaborations with Jim Steinman. She was looking for a new musical direction and, surprisingly, was a big fan of the rapidly evolving Goth genre. “I loved Bauhaus, Birthday Party, but especially the Sisters. I was handed a tape of their music by Duncan Kilburn from the Psychedelic Furs,” she later revealed in an interview. “I was recording in LA and the Furs were in the studio next door. Duncan was wearing a Merciful Release T-shirt and that got us talking. I listened to the tape repeatedly whenever I got a moment. It was so dark and raw – miles from the polished fluff I felt I was recording at the time.”

Having floated into Tyler’s circle via his acquaintance with her manager, Ronnie Scott, Scratch invited her down to Das Boot without knowing any of this.

The Sisters of Mercy had just finished recording their first album, ‘First and Last and Always’, but Hussey was increasingly estranged from Sisters lead singer, Andrew Eldritch, before the album had even been released. He came to Das Boot to discuss moving to Invented Records with a newly configured band.

Finally, Astbury of The Cult had turned up because he was shit-faced after a gig promoting recently released album, Dreamtime. He knew Scratch was good for cheap amphetamines.

In the booth that night, Tyler hit it off with both men, and, ever attuned to the main chance, Scratch offered to take them all to the Invented studio above the club for a jam session.

Pulling in a few random musicians from the darker corners of Das Boot, Scratch acted as engineer himself, as Tyler recorded some very rough one-take tracks with Hussey on lead guitar, and Astbury on percussion and backing vocals.

“It was amazing how great her voice was – she just kept belting out these amazing vocals, despite the epic intake of tequila and cigarettes,” Hussey said.

As dawn reluctantly illuminated Croydon’s cut-price imitation of the Manhattan skyline, Tyler was tracked down by her management and whisked into a limo. Perhaps, once sober, she realised that Goth wasn’t her future. Perhaps, fearing for their income stream, Ronnie Scott and Steve Wolfe persuaded her to drop the idea.

Either way, Bonnie Tyler continued in an increasingly mainstream musical direction. Even if she had any memory of that crazy Croydon night, it was quickly forgotten due to the whirlwind of touring commitments.

However, Scratch had not forgotten. Four of the tracks from that funereal jam session to would eventually surface on the EP, ‘Total Eclipse of My Art’, released by Invented in October 1984.

[nottheweirdest]

Sonadotober Day 26: Potion

Sonic and Shadow learn the hard way that they might be raising a future chemist....

Read below or on Ao3!

Sonic let his fake energetic aura fall away as he waved off their final birthday guest and shut the door. He leaned heavily against it and shared a look of exhaustion with his husband who was just returning from laying their son down for a nap upstairs.

“Is he down?” Sonic asked, walking toward the living room and picking up shredded wrapping and tissue paper on his way.

“Out like a light. I’m a little jealous.”

“A little?” Sonic joked weakly. “I’d take on a hoard of badniks if it meant I got a couple hours of uninterrupted naptime.”

Shadow grabbed a trash bag and held it open for Sonic’s wadded ball of paper before he started collecting discarded and half drained beverages. “Seconded. Where’s Amelia?”

“In her bedroom opening that kit Tails got her.”

“The science one?”

“Mmhmm, though I think she thinks it’s for making potions.”

Shadow laughed as he dumped a stack of plates in their sink to be loaded in the dishwasher later. “I suppose chemistry and potion making aren’t that different really.”

“Not in the eyes of a six year old,” Sonic agreed, snagging one last empty gift bag from under the coffee table. Emerald eyes glanced at their well loved navy sofa with longing as he stood.

Maybe just… a little break would be okay. He made a beeline for the cushioned repose, grabbing his husband’s hand on the way.

“Sonic, we need to--”

“Three minutes.”

“But--”

Sonic flopped back on the couch and groaned as his body celebrated being off his feet for the first time since waking. He cracked open a single eye and gave Shadow a sleepy half smile. “You know Oliver will be up in no time. It’s now or never.”

Sensing the truth in that statement Shadow allowed himself to collapse next to his partner with a heavy sigh, trash bag falling forgotten at his feet. “Why is it that we can fight Eggman for hours, and be exhilarated afterwards, and then one birthday party nearly kills us?”

“Different types of energy use?”

“Perhaps,” Shadow murmured, eyes closing. “Or maybe we’re just getting old.”

Sonic leaned to the side and pressed a kiss against his love’s neck, and then another. “Not that old,” he whispered, distracted from his exhaustion by the prospect of a moment’s privacy to sneak a few kisses.

Crimson opened slightly. “I thought you were tired.”

Sonic shrugged, pushing himself up so he could reach tan lips. “Second wind.”

“Uh huh,” Shadow teased, pulling Sonic closer. “What if there’s no wind in my sails?”

Sonic licked at Shadow’s bottom lip and smiled as his eyes met crimson. “Oooh I’ll fill your sails,” he winked.

Shadow leaned forward prepared to let Sonic do exactly that, when he stopped, ears swiveling. He tensed.

Sonic froze, looking around. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s quiet.”

The hero immediately pulled away, tripping over the trash bag and hopping on one foot around the scattered clutter still littering their living room floor. Both hedgehogs darted for the steps. “Amelia?” Shadow called out.

Silence.

They stumbled into her room at the same time only to find it empty. “Amelia!” Sonic called louder.

“In here!” an excited voice finally answered.

Shadow dipped back into the hallway first, following their daughter’s voice to their bedroom and into the master bathroom. His jaw dropped open.

“Amelia, what are you--?” Sonic stopped just as he came to the door.

Neither hero moved, both frozen in horrified disbelief.

“Look!” the young hedgehog grinned. “I made a potion! Just like Uncle Tails!”

The girl held up a flask with a hand coated in some unknown combination of conditioner, lotions and soap. Across the sink a graduated cylinder lay on its side, still spilling foamed contents that dripped from the sink and down cupboards. Smears and streaks of miscellaneous white were spread across their bathroom mirror like an attempt at finger painted clouds, much like the walls. And the floors. And Amelia herself.

Suddenly Shadow burst into laughter. The dark hedgehog ran a tired hand over his face and turned to his husband. “I think it’s bath time for our little chemist.”

The girl squealed happily. “We can make bath time potions!!”

“I think maybe we’ll only make bath time potions from now on,” Sonic said, gingerly stepping into the space and turning on the bath. Shadow tossed him a towel which he sat on the side of the tub before opening his arms. “C’mon Dr. Amelia, scientist extraordinaire, let’s see what concoctions we can come up with.”

“You’ll have to remember what you make, so you can show Uncle Tails,” Shadow said, picking up the scattered, sticky equipment from the sink and tossing it in the bath. “He should experience your potion making skills first hand.”

“Oh definitely,” Sonic said, nodding mischievously at his husband. “In fact, why don’t we arrange a little sleep over with Uncle Tails and it can be a surprise!”

“Yeah!!”

“We’ll even make a little travel bag of potion ingredients,” Shadow added.

Sonic looked over his shoulder as he lifted his daughter into the bath and mouthed, “Good point.” Tails did have some actual solvents and chemicals that a six year old should definitely not be exploring. He wondered if they could get some of the foaming stuff humans used. Shaving cream seemed like the perfect ingredient for payback.

“Uncle Tails is going to be so happy!”

Shadow and Sonic shared another look, both grinning mischievously. “He’ll be ecstatic,” Shadow winked.

He was not.

But Amelia was.

[kibybun]

Hi. Can I ask you to write about Aizawa or Hawks and their darling, who constantly joked about death and eventually she committed suicide, please? I love your writing💞 You are so awesome and talented and cool. Thank you so much for your work💕

Oh my gosh, thank you so much! I hope you like it!💞💞

Platonic Yandere Hawks x suicide joking reader

Tw: Yandere, suicide, self harm, angst

Enjoy!

💛Hawks first met you at the sports festival, showing off your quirk and demonstrating power. You caught his attention rather quickly.

💛Not only were you adorable but intriguing as well. You wore long sleeves, even though you looked uncomfortable in them, and you seemed oddly quiet compared to everyone else, shying away when they come up to talk to you.

💛Another thing that stood out to him was when you were doing the calvary battle. No one came to ask you to join their team, but you didn't go out and ask to join either. You just stood there until a purple hair guy came up to you, most likely getting you to join his group.

💛Though, you seemed to change. Your fighting style and the way you use your quirk changed.

💛It bothered Hawks the whole calvary battle but he was put at ease when some kid with a tail backed out due to the other guy brainwashing him.

💛You end up backing out too, much to Hawk's dismay.

💛Even though you weren't fighting anymore he still keeps his attention on you, not seeing your other classmates or students.

💛He watched you zone out and silently cheer for your classmates, finding it adorable as you watch in awe at some of the battles.

💛The sports festival ends and he follows you home, only to make surd your okay. Once he got home he quickly put in a request for you to come intern with him before going to bed.

💛When you went back to school you were excited to see if anyone wanted you to intern with them, knowing you wouldn't get as many requests like Todoroki or Deku.

💛... two. Only two requests.

💛It hurt to look at the board and see that you one of the most unwanted students in class 1-A. You thought you did really well and maybe impressed more than two people.

💛You get your list of hero agencies and sink deeper into your self pitty when you realize that one of the agencies werebt even specifically asking for you. All the students got requested by them.

💛That leaves Hawk's agency.

💛You didn't know much about him and his work so this was going to be awkward.

💛When the day came to board the subway and head off to your internship, no one wished you goodbye. All the groups and clicks were together, walking each other to their respective trains while you again, stood alone. You ere used to it though.

💛You board the train and zone out, nearly missing your stop.

💛Right as you get off the train your vision is filled with red feathers. Low and behold the pro hero who requested you.

💛His charisma hits you as you instantly feel welcome. He makes witty remarks about the train being too slow as he begins walking with you in tow.

💛Along the way you ask him why he wanted you to intern with him. He smirks and responds with a "Why wouldn't I?" That didn't answer your question.

💛He walks you to his agency and introduces you to all his other interns. After that he shoves you towards the bathroom, telling you to change into your hero costume.

💛He sure didn't waste time as the two of you begin patrolling the city. It seemed very rushed and eager but you prefered it over having to sit in class and do quizzes.

💛During patrol Hawks starts questioning you about school and life almkst like an uncle or brother would. It was very odd to you, considering you never get asked questions about yourself.

💛You felt so pitiful not being able to tell him your birthday, you had forgotten it, but somehow he was so understanding and kind about it.

💛It wasn't long before all of his fans flocked to the two of you, shouting questions and begging for autographs. You didn't like how all the people were surrounding you and Hawks could tell.

💛He uses his wing to shield you and hastily shoos the crowd off. After that he asks if you're okay and checks to make sure you didn't get hurt.

💛His intentions weren't to sleep with you, no. They were pure. He almost saw himself in you, alone and blocked off from the world. He just wanted to protect you and make sure you knew you weren't alone.

💛It was working too.

💛In the short week you were with him you had laughed the hardest you had in awhile and smiled more. You even considered him your bestfriend.

💛The one downside of your friendship was he couldn't see your cries for help.

💛While one roofs or flying with him you'd make jokes about how easy it would be to fall and die or how fun it'd feel to free fall.

💛He'd only laugh these off, thinking it was some kind of dark humor, because if something was wrong he'd trust you to tell him.

💛When the internship was over you had to hold back tears as he hugged you goodbye. Of course he gave you his number to keep in touch but it wouldn't be the same as sneaking away from work and eating fried chicken.

💛The second the train left you felt how alone you were. You didnt want to text him right away because that would feel too needy. Should you even text him? Was he doing it just to be nice or did he actually care?

💛You leave those thoughts behind as your phone buzzes. It was a text from Hawks. "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

💛Your mood brightens as the two of you continue sending dumb chicken jokes, memes, and puns, with the occasional "dark humored" joke from you.

💛You make it home and your texting slowed, mainly due to Hawks having to work. You didn't know he was actually flying outside your house, making sure you were okay before flying off to buy you a dumb looking teddy bear.

💛Slowly, your mood begins to brighten with the constant reassurance of Hawks being there. He knew the right things to say at all times. Self conscious about your outfit? Incomes a barrage of compliments and confidence boosters. Nervous about a test or presentation? Boom, paragraphs about how amazing you are and how you can do it.

💛It almost made the emptiness inside go away.

💛Problems don't just go away, and it really shows.

💛Whenever you couldn't text or call Hawks your loniness sinks in. You had no other friends besides him. Your parents weren't the beat either with their comments about what you're doing or what you're wearing.

💛It only reminded you of all the reasons for the scars on your arms.

💛But before you could act on those reasons he was there. It was always magicly when you were crying in bed or fumbling with a sharp object.

💛Over time Hawks picked up on your thoughts and feelings, causing him to watch over you every second he could. He loved you so much, he couldn't lose you.

💛The amount of cute gifts he gets you griw over time. More stuffed animals, more snacks, more little trinkets. Anything to make you happy.

💛And again, it worked. The nights you spent crying or staring numbly at the ceiling slowly decreased. You also threw away the razors you had hidden, determined to stay clean.

💛When the work studies came you were the happiest you've ever been. You got to be with Hawks again.

💛Upon seeing him you were greeted with the best hug you've ever gotten along with fried chicken for lunch.

💛But something was off this time. He seemed a little more paranoid walking around the city with you, more eager to be inside at night, and disappearing at night.

💛It worried you, making you overthink the hole situation tenfold.

💛What if he was trying to avoid you? Where you being that annoying? Maybe he was tired of you. You should just leave him alone.

💛He hugs you goodbye as you leave, still conflicted.

💛Sadly your thoughts only grow stronger as time goes on. His texts become shorter and less frequent, making you think he was tired of you. His constant gifts had stopped as well

💛Hawks couldn't control his lack of contact with you. He wanted to spam you with memes at two am like he normally did but he was given a mission that couldn't be compromised, even at the expense of your friendship.

💛You fall back into your dark place without him. You were reminded of how forgettable you were to everyone, how you had no friends beside him, how your parents were disappointed in you.

💛What's the point in living in pain?

💛You start cutting again, just wanting to feel something again. You stop sleeping and eating, not feeling the need for it anymore. You completely passed out during training due to this.

💛One weekend you ride a train away from your town and into the one where Hawk's agency was. You were looking for him, a sign, anything, to tell you to stop.

💛The streets were empty and he was no where in sight.

💛You fight yourself at the top of a business building, hands trembling as you sent a final text to your only friend. You told him how much he ment to you, how grateful you were to him, how sorry you were for being annoying and taking up so much of his time, how this was goodbye.

💛You got to feel the wind rush past you. You were right about it being fun to free fall.

💛Hawks was talking to Dabi when his phone buzzed. Thinking it was the commission he checked it.

💛Dabi watched as Hawk's smug demeanor turned to confused then broken. He watched the pro hero fall to his knees and clutch his phone, nearly cracking it.

💛Dabi didn't even have a chance to ask what was wrong as Hawks flew at super sonic speed away from him and up into the sky.

💛He first scanned the buildings looking for you, wiping the tears from his eyes to try and see better. When he couldn't find you he swoops down low to the streets to see if he could catch you before you hit the ground.

💛He stops when he sees the splatters of your body of the ground.

💛He collapses next to you, sobbing as he looked at your remains.

💛It was his fault. He should've been there so much more. He should've watched you more carefully than he did. He should've killed those fuckers who thought they were better than you.

💛You should've lived.

💛Hawks lays there crying, going over all the things he did wrong and how it should've been him to die.

💛The morning comes and police officers tape off the area, pulling a now broken man away from you. They clean the area and leave.

💛Hawks mindlessly sits in the spot you were in, hoping this was a nightmare.

💛Night falls and Dabi managed to find him. He tells Hawks that he saw the news. It was odd for him to feel sympathy for a hero but here he was.

💛Hawks stands and grabs Dabi's hand, placing it on his face before begging him to set him ablaze. He didn't want to live in a world without you.

💛Dabi backs up, retreating his hand and looking at him stunned. What exactly did you mean to him?

💛Hawks continues to beg and pleas but Dabi continues to refuse. Too bad Hawks would do anything to die at this point.

💛Hawks shouts out his plans to spy on the league, to manipulate and destroy them from the inside. How he would kill them all in secret if he could. How it would be the best feeling ever to watch them die in betrayal.

💛Dabi falls for his trap. Rage was the only thing he could feel as his fire engulfed Hawks, semding him to the grave in a firey blaze.

💛He ran from the scene, leaving another body in the same spot.

kiby~💚

[theroguequeenaniki]

Questions 2009 -> 2021

This is from my Facebook. It popped up on my memories page thing. I originally answered this in 2009 when I was 15, it’s now 2021 & and I am 27, so I’m gonna do it again. Leaving the original answers. Original answers will be italicized. Commentary on the original answers in parentheses & crossed out? Lol. (I’m not gonna tag anyone, but, like, I guess if you want to answer these random questions from Facebook 12 years ago, go ahead lol) 

Questions

Can you fill this out without lying? You've been tagged, so now you need to answer all the questions HONESTLY. At the end, choose people to tag. Don't forget to tag me so I can see your answers! To do this, copy this entire message, then go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, delete my answers, and type yours. Easy! Next, tag people that you think may enjoy this (in the right hand corner of the app). Click publish (at the bottom). Have fun! :) 1.What was the last thing you put in your mouth? My cup with my Big Red in it The straw to my Kate Spade tumbler to drink my HEB Cola Lol.

2.Where was your profile picture taken? I got it off the internet. it's a random anime girl. My bedroom. 3.Can you play Guitar Hero? Never played it. Probably wouldn't be good at it. Not to good at video games. But I am good at Mario Cart, both 64 and the Wii. plus I'm good at some Sonic games. Still never played it. Idk if I’m any good at Mario Cart or the Sonic games anymore, I haven’t played either in years lol

4.Name someone who made you laugh today? Doctor Who TikTok. My cats.

5.How late did you stay up last night and why? Umm, probably about 10:00 cause it took me forevor to get into bed. Uh..Past 4am. Lol. B/c my sleep schedule is fucked. I was in bed by 3am though, but I was playing games & watching TikToks on my phone. Lol.

6.If you could move somewhere else, would you? Yes. I'd move to either New York or Sweden. I don’t know. Part of me says yes. But part of me says no..b/c even though Texas has it’s faults (a LOT of them), I cannot imagine living anywhere else long-term..

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks? HAHA. Yeah right. I've never even been kissed! Still nope. I have been kissed though. He just didn’t kiss me under the fireworks the one NYE we spent together...

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you? Um, I think R, but D might also. D is accross Stasney from me and R is a couple blocks down (I don’t talk to these people much anymore & I’m not going to share their names on Tumblr) Uh. I think Maybe Raven? B/c they’re the only one who lives in the same city still. But, Sarah might technically be closer distance wise? Hold on. Ok, yeah, Sarah’s closer, even though she doesn’t live in this city anymore.

9. Do you believe exes can be friends? It all depends on the situation.(I totally stold M's answer but it's true) (I don’t talk to this person anymore & I’m not gonna share their name on Tumblr) I mean, yeah. Two of my best friends are each others exes and they’re still friends. I haven’t stayed friend with my ex, but, uh, he ghosted me so? Lol.

10. How do you feel about Dr. Pepper? I love it. I still love it. Lol.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard? I can't remember. I don't think it was that long ago, I had a light cry on Saturday, but I don't remember the last time I cried really hard. When we got back from our trip in July. Had a full on breakdown that night. Overheated all weekend. Overwhelmed. Anxiety. It was not a very good vacation..I cry a lot though.

12. Who took your profile picture? I got it off of google. I did. 

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of? Umm, either myself, or one of my family members. Aside from myself. I think my dad, on his phone, b/c there was a cicada on his shoulder and he wanted to ask the family group chat if he could keep it. Lol. I take a LOT of pictures of cats though. Lol.

14. Was yesterday better than today? Hail yes! To much drama today! And I couldn't avoid it cause I was in the middle of it! (Oof, what drama was 15 yo Linda dealing with that she couldn’t avoid? Lol. I mean, I guess, Sophomore year was a bit full of drama lol) Anyway, I mean, they were pretty much the same. One wasn’t better than the other. One wasn’t worse than the other.

15. Can you live a day without TV? yeah. Now Music there is something I can't live without! Yep, Do it almost everyday. Sentiments about music remain the same. Lol.

16. Are you upset about anything? Yes. I'm annoyed about something and it's making me upset. (I assume this has something to do with the the drama mentioned earlier lol) Always. Anxiety & depression are a bitch. My rooms a mess & I can’t get myself to clean it. My shelves are still a mess.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it? yeah. though i havent really had one yet. I mean, yeah. Even though I haven’t had one last, aside from friendships, but they’re worth it. 

18. Are you a bad influence? I hope not. If so, let me know.(again I took M's answer but it's true) Probably. Idk. Lol.

19. Night out or night in? Depends on what's going on and how I feel about it. Night in usually. I do like going out sometimes, but, like, to dinner. Maybe a movie or a show. But, you know, we’ve been in a panini press, the only thing I’ve been comfortable doing is going to dinner (fully vaxxed & masked). But I also prefer staying home anyway. (Like I usually just go to dinner with my family lol)

20. What items could you not go without during the day? my computer. my book. my journal and a pen. My phone. My journal (b/c I write in it every night, as a diary, 14yo Linda wrote stories). Uh. I didn’t take food or drinks into account in the og, so I won’t in those. But, yeah. My phone & journal. I can go a day without my laptop if I need to. (Went the whole trip in July without pulling it out, though maybe that’s not a good example since my anxiety on that trip was so high..) I want to say a book, but I’ve been in a massive reading slump so...I wish I read as much as 15yo Linda did..

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? I don't remember. I think it was myself.(if you want to know, ask me in person) I honestly don’t know. I don’t remember the last time I was in a hospital. 

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say? "Mrbobbybones:  wish ted would finally meet their mother already. geez. get to it. However, I see myself in that character more and more each episode." yeah. That's what it says. It's from Twitter. (Huh? and I can’t even go check b/c my inbox doesn’t go back to 2009 on Twitter?? (I haven’t had my account that long) Wait wait wait just remembered I used to get tweets to my phone as text messages lol)

Facebook messenger: “ Cool” From our group chat. Lol.

From actual text messages on my phone: “ heeey! Just put up the Tuesday PDS just for you  it’s a big one.” From Phillip Defranco’s text line Lol.

23. How do you feel about your life right now? I'm loving and hating it. but hey nobody gets out alive right? Uh..I mean. I’m alive. I have WiFi. Food. Family. I haven’t seen my friends in 2 years. (Minus Alex, b/c they were here in July to cat/house sit, but I saw them for like, one night..) There’s a lot that could be better. A lot that could be worse. 

24. Do you hate anyone? yes!!! Oof. I mean, kinda.

25. If we were to look in your Facebook Inbox, what would we find? some random conversations. most of my convos on her though have been in chat or through comments. Facebook Inbox is now Facebook Messenger. So you’ll find all my Facebook Messenger convos. Mostly our group chat. And side group chats for secret planning (birthdays & stuff). Plus other chats? Lol.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass? I better! (excuse me miss 15yo Linda you absolutely could have passed a drug test you ALSO didn’t drink or smoke or take any drugs lol) Yeah. Absolutely. I don’t drink or smoke or take any drugs so, yeah? Lol.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before? 

Yes. But I can't remember when... Yeah. Pretty sure. 

28. What song is stuck in your head? Gee by SNSD(Girls Generation) They're Korean. A few My Chemical Romance songs

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be? EDWARD CULLEN! Joke! lol. No I don't know. If it was Edward, I'd call the cops. whoever it is though better have an explaination or they are gonna get hit in the head with my Book of Shadows. (Maybe I wouldn’t mind Edward at my window though? Lol.) Uh. My friends? Lol. Idk if I want anyone knocking on my window at 2am.

30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50? I don't know....... Uh. No? Idk. Most likely not gonna happen. 

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow? I can't think of anything right now... Eat. Should probably clean my room.

32. Do you think too much or too little? Way to much! lol. Way way way too much

33. Do you smile a lot? i try to. I think I do. I get told that alot in Theater...

I think so

[inkabelledesigns]

Vibrance the Hedgehog: Reflecting on a Decade of being a Sonic Fan and an Artist

Today is Sonic’s 30th anniversary, and it has me feeling all kinds of sentimental. So today I want to talk about it. A lot of you probably don’t know I’m a Sonic fan unless you follow me on the voice acting side of things. I’ve been Rouge the Bat in a ton of fan projects for years now, and especially with Adrenaline Dubs, a lot of people recognize my voice from the work I’ve done as her. 

But believe it or not, Sonic is what started me down my path as an artist. I originally started drawing because a friend of mine did cool Sonic fan art back in 2010, and I wanted to be a part of that. My friends were super into the series, and even though most of us drifted away from it, I held on and hopped from group to group for years. Most treated me like garbage, but there were a few diamonds in the rough that I’ve reconnected with over the years. I got hurt badly enough that I stopped drawing Sonic fan art, I just couldn’t look at it without feeling this sickness in my gut. But last night, I got reminded of a video from like seven years ago where it was just a catchy song and a rapid-fire showcase of Sonic fan characters, and I was compelled to go and doodle the one that meant the most to me. I’m not gonna show it here, because it was late and not a great sketch, but I did want to pull up her original artwork.

This is Vibrance, from May of 2014. At one point in my life, she was my whole world. I had a lot of FCs before her, but she was the one that stood out the most. She was the coolest, this audiokinetic teenager who looked up to Sonic and wanted to be a hero like he was (and had a goal of challenging him to a breakdancing battle, that was a thing). This is the only digital version I have, and it’s pulled from my old DA page. I remember being so proud of this picture, my best friend helped me with it during tech class our junior year of high school (we always finished our work early, and the teacher would let us draw when we did). She did the pants wrinkles, but everything else was mine. I loved this drawing so much that when I went to get my senior photos taken, I posed with it. Drawing this stuff was my entire identity back then (and it wasn’t healthy). I wanted people to see me as a skilled artist, I thought that if I could prove myself in my craft, that I’d have the respect I wanted from people, but the groups I was with were mostly filled with these self righteous donkeys that were more interested in making fun of me than helping me improve. 

But that didn’t stop me from improving. Vibe was with me through it all. I transitioned into learning digital art when I reached my last year of high school, mostly because I got my first pen tablet (which I still use to this day). These are some of the pieces I was proud of from 2017. I entered Vibrance into the first annual Pageant Mobius competition, and while I got burnt out and couldn’t keep going, I’m still glad I expanded my horizons and tried new things with these. As I got further into college, got emotionally destroyed in a few relationships, and just had more doubts about my art, I gave up doing Sonic stuff. The last piece I did was this piece of Zonic for my friend Trev, as payment for a favor. That was in 2018, same year I graduated.

I haven’t touched Sonic in a long time, not for art or for pleasure. I joined up with AD mostly because of my friends in the VA scene. If they hadn’t wanted me to stick around, I probably wouldn’t be voice acting for Sonic stuff still. I feel like most people don’t realize I’m an artist these days, given I don’t draw as much, much less post it. They hear my voice, and that’s the thing they want from me. And you know what? Most of the time, I can be okay with that. I get immense joy from voicing characters, be it ones you’re familiar with or personal OCs, hearing people squeal and get excited over having something they love come to life is satisfying. 

That’s the thing I always craved with my art and never got, I wanted to share my excitement, and no one wanted to share it with me. And it wasn’t just visual art, it was my stories too. I was a writer long before I ever drew, like I was still learning cursive when I started making up my own stories. Nobody wanted to hear what I had to share, I was just kind of forgotten. I’m still in some places where I’m left out, no matter how much dedication I show in trying to support others, but I’ve finally found places that do want to listen and interact with what I have, where I’m happy to do the same back. Most of those places are tied to Bendy and nutcracker stuff, and it makes me so gosh darn happy to share those things with people. It’s nice to have a space where I finally feel valued.

So now that I have an outlet that gives me that, I think I’m more content with my drawings. I think I’m happier not worrying about what other people think of my art. Sure, I still worry a little bit, I’ve got a lot of great friends who are so skilled at what they do, I don’t want to look bad next to them, and I’m motivated to keep practicing and trying new things in that way. But at the same time, it ultimately doesn’t matter what anyone thinks, I’m having fun creating, and that’s something I missed a lot.

When I look at Sonic, I’m enveloped by this childish wonder. I’m reminded of my first home console game, Sonic Colors, and how much fun I had with it (you can imagine I’m super excited for the remaster this year, that makes me so happy). I’m reminded of my long car rides trying to beat Sonic Rush Adventure, or sharing the Winter Olympics with my friends and sisters. I laugh at stupid inside jokes with some of my friends, the FCs we made, the roleplays we had. I smile when I remember the hype over Mania, or the joy I had going to see the Sonic movie in the theater with my sister (the last public outing I had before the pandemic hit, and it was magical for every moment). When I look at Sonic, I’m reminded of the fact that I had a lot of fun with him. His series was my favorite, because it made me feel like I could be anything I wanted to be. He was brave, charming, and confident in himself, and he was fast, oh gosh was he fast. I needed to see that as a kid, someone who wasn’t afraid to stand up and do the right thing. Every year on his anniversary, I take a moment to celebrate quietly to myself, usually by popping in an old game and playing a level or two. No clue how I’m gonna celebrate this year, but I know this much: even with all the bad things that happened, nothing can take away how much I love this hedgehog, or how important this franchise was to my journey as a creative, and in becoming a better person. You may not see me share much of that nowadays, but I don’t need to be active in the fandom to be a fan. I’ll still hold Sonic close to my heart, even if no one else ever knows about it. Not gonna lie, I’ve cried a few times in writing this post, but I’m glad I said it. 

Thank you for reading this. Thank you for listening to my artistic ramblings, for supporting me when I have something to share, for being around when I want to geek out. No matter what you come to my page for, I’m glad I have this blog, along with so many lovely people who fill my heart with so much joy. Happy Birthday Sonic, keep on running. 

[bimboamyrose]

Unfamiliar - A Metamy Fanfic (Ch. 8)

First two chapters

Previous (Ch.7)

Somewhere in a childhood bedroom in a little house on a coast, a young girl kneeled on her rug far past her bedtime. Intentions set on finding true love, she knocked and shuffled her tarot cards across the rug like dominos then fanned them out in front of her. The girl had received the deck some days earlier- an early birthday gift from her cousin, who was her only caregiver. Superstitious about having to receive her first deck as a gift, she had studied the cards for months before getting a set of her own. Now, on the eve of her eighth birthday, a young Amy Rose was divining her future. 

A recurring dream about falling in love with a mysterious figure had vexed her thoughts for weeks but was waved off as an overactive imagination by whoever she told. The dream’s setting was curious- a tropical landscape surrounded by construction and cold machinery. In the physical world, a small heavenly body orbited close to her world for a few weeks out of the year. This time, Little Planet appeared like a ghost out of its foggy valley. The usually lush globe was now a bleak gray sphere tethered by a massive chain to the ground below, unable to return to its home in the sky. Amy’s dreams were nothing short of a premonition.  Few were willing to investigate the looming satellite, but word had spread of a hero who’d caught sight of the planetoid in its deplorable state and ventured to liberate it. That was who she’d be destined to meet- she was sure of it.

Amy picked her hand and stacked the deck. A simple 5-card spread in a cross pattern offered to guide her in manifesting her cryptic love. She placed the first card in the center, then one each first on the right of it, then to the left. She repeated this above then below her first card and prepared to ask her questions. 

Fortune-telling guidebooks often recommended the querent first be introspective when it came to relationship matters. She thought for a moment. She was still new to fortune-telling and always found the first query to be the most challenging. Her vulnerability and uncertainty were apparent, and that was perhaps the first thing she would have to overcome. “Am I ready to find love?” she asked aloud. A nervous flip of the card revealed an upright Ace of Wands- her first time drawing it. A card to represent action and new beginnings. An encouraging start! She giggled a bit as her heart raced with excitement. 

“Okay, second card,” she breathed. “What will they be like?” The turn revealed a most unusual reversed Hierophant. Her brow curled as she tried to interpret what it meant. The religious figure depicted on the card stared back at her sternly. The Hierophant represented rigidity, conformity, tradition. She took the reverse of that to represent someone defiant in nature, who seeks freedom and independence. A little sigh came out of her when the thought of falling in love with a cute rebel flashed across her mind. That sounds exciting, she mused.

Clearing her throat, the girl placed a hand upon the third card in her spread. “How will our first meeting go?” The ever ominous Tower caused her to gasp. Change. Danger. Chaos. She paged through her favorite tarot book frantically, trying to find a more positive association for the sign, when her eyes landed on the word “unexpected.” That’s not so bad, she reasoned. She supposed it wasn’t unreasonable to expect some danger- there was obviously something threatening Little Planet. And she was most likely looking for someone heroic, after all. 

Shaking off the negative thoughts, she persisted. Her fingers rested delicately on card number four as she made her query and hoped for the best. “What will our relationship be like?” she asked, nervously flipping it over. The Moon. Everything is not as it seems, she recalled learning about it. More uncertainty. Rather than think of her would-be love as potentially deceptive or dishonest, she believed The Moon foreshadowed surprises in the relationship. Ever the romantic, the mystery lit a fire in her heart. She chose to expect these surprises would be pleasant, but perhaps that simply wishful thinking. 

Amy focused her energy on the last card, closing her eyes and breathing in deeply as she held her palm over the top of it. There was much precariousness to overcome, and she wanted it to be worth her while. What would chasing this premonition ultimately bring her? Would it bring her happiness in the end? She cleared her throat. “Will it be worth it?” she asked timidly. The card revealed an injured man clutching a staff with many more behind him. The Nine of Wands- a bittersweet symbol. It represented struggles and difficult times ahead, but also perseverance and reward. In terms of a yes or no answer, it was unclear; she would have to decide for herself.

Now came the time to put together the symbolic puzzle and tell a story. Her own story. Reading one’s own fortune is tricky in a way- you tend to tell yourself what you want to hear. She closed her eyes and envisioned what the future could hold for her; tried to imagine the challenges she could face and whether she could overcome them. Surely with a heroic figure by her side, they would persevere. She smiled silently at the romantic thought- two lovers against the world. A rebellious spirit. Pleasant surprises. 

A sense of encouragement overcame her when she next looked at her spread. The Wands stood out to her now. The Ace shouting that she was ready, the Nine offering great rewards if she persevered. Her heart lit with nervous excitement as she shot up from the floor and ran to her dresser mirror. “Perseverance leads to success. You’re ready!” she affirmed. The girl’s beaming smile reflected back at her. She couldn’t sleep a wink for the rest of the night.

-----

The journey up to Little Planet was already proving to be arduous. No way Amy was going to be able to climb the massive chain tethering the worlds together. She had hiked up the mountainside hoping to find an alternate route. As she approached the side facing the valley, Amy noticed huge, metallic containers being swarmed by several strange robotic creatures down below. Then, one of the containers floated up, propelled by some kind of floating platform. She gasped as she took cover behind a boulder, watching the container fly straight into Little Planet’s atmosphere. It moved somewhat slowly and didn’t seem to be manned. That was her ticket up there.

Once it had hovered past, she looked back toward the operation in the valley. There were only two more of those containers. Amy swallowed hard as the danger became apparent. I can do this. Perseverance leads to success. The next box was being lifted off the ground by four mechanical bees. It was placed on another platform that then began its ascent. The last one seemed to take its time climbing up, but to Amy, this one totally zoomed past. Her body refused to cooperate. She couldn’t manage to force herself to jump off the cliffside. What if she missed it? What if she overshot it? Her opportunity to jump on flew past.

No! I have to do this. I can do this…

Amy peeked her head over the side of the mountain once again. One container left. If she didn’t hitch a ride now, she would never get up there. She watched as the cargo was loaded, counting the seconds until it floated past her. Perseverance leads to success. Perseverance leads to success. Perseverance-

It was probably less than a second, but the leap Amy took onto the precariously floating platform lasted an eternity. Her heart could have jumped out of her chest- and it probably would have if she hadn’t landed squarely in the middle of the storage container. It wasn't the smoothest landing, but Amy was surprised to find that she felt… perfectly fine. She wasn’t hurt. She wasn’t scared. Seconds earlier, the girl was sure that if a fall didn’t kill her, a heart attack surely would. But now, a sense of relief washed over her. I’m actually doing this!

The platform neared the globe as a densely humid fog filled the air. Clouds obscured her vision for a few seconds before it came into full view. Construction cranes clashed with the otherwise natural landscape. The platform stopped ascending and shifted to one side suddenly, Amy slipping slightly toward the edge, doing her best to cling to the smooth metal surface. She was being carried over a valley now. Catching sight of the drop below her caused her to shutter. Then suddenly, the ground grew nearer and nearer, until the platform was hovering mere inches off a canyon wall. She could see another gaping valley ahead as the platform approached the horizon. If there was ever a time to hop off, this was it.

She quickly covered her head and rolled onto the rocky ground, scraping her legs and arms. Suppressing a wimper, Amy slowly got up. It was just a few scratches. But it stings... Tears welled in her eyes for a moment until she shook her head defiantly. Perseverance leads to success. Get over it! she told herself. So she persisted.

Amy walked along the wide canyon wall until she reached a hilly region lavish with palm trees and small waterfalls. Two hikes and hardly a wink of sleep later, she was exhausted. She didn’t really have the slightest idea of where she should be looking for this mystery person. Becoming frustrated, Amy planted herself under a small grove of tropical fauna. The sun blazed overhead, just halfway across the sky. Just as she was beginning to ask herself what she was doing there, Amy heard a distinct whoosh at the base of the hill. 

Whatever made the noise was gone by the time she looked down over the hillside. Then, another loud whoosh in the opposite direction. If she’d blinked she would have surely missed it. Nothing but the afterimage of a blue blur remained- and Amy recognized it immediately. She gasped excitedly at the realization. That was Sonic the Hedgehog!

She’d heard the name trending around town for months. The hero that saved South Island from the evil Dr. Robotnik. The fastest thing alive. And my total dream man!, she added giddily. She couldn’t believe it. He was the hero she was destined to meet! Her fortune was beginning to improve, no doubt about it. Now, she only had to find a way to talk to him. 

He zoomed past again, making another whoosh behind her. Amy quickly turned to see the blur speeding left and right up the hill, then disappear- presumably into a cave or tunnel. There was a long, flat expanse of land ahead. The erratic movements gave her a chance to catch up with him ahead. A sudden bolt of energy rushed through her as she raced to the end of the hill bank. 

The land formed into a bridge ahead of her and Amy was sure that Sonic would pass through soon enough. What she didn’t expect was for a massive, bipedal mech to come down just in front of her, blocking her path. The immense machine towered over her as she stopped dead in her tracks, tripping her to the ground.

“Oh, what do we have here?” A sinister male voice came from the top of the machine. Amy looked up to find it was piloted by a bald, rotund man with a wooly mustache. She recognized him from the stories she’d heard- Dr. Robotnik. “Another one of Sonic’s little friends? Oh, but you don’t look so tough,” he cackled. A mammoth mechanical leg hovered over her. She covered her eyes and screeched in horror.

Her shocked screams must have traveled far, as Amy didn’t have to wait another second before Sonic came dashing to her rescue. In an instant, she’d been scooped off the ground and carried to safety just as the machine’s foot connected with the ground. She hesitantly peeked between her fingers. Sonic had lowered her to the ground gently before zooming back down the land bridge toward the terrible contraption. She watched in awe as her hero leaped and dashed, taking down the machine in a matter of seconds. Somehow, the man escaped as part of the mech broke off into a floating orb and flew away. Amy heard him cursing back at Sonic but couldn’t catch what he’d said. 

She sighed and swooned as she realized how her fortunes were coming true. This must have been that turbulent meeting she was expecting. It wouldn’t be long before the rest of the cards fell into place. “Hello!” she waved him over cheerfully. “I’m Amy Rose! Thank you for saving me!”

Sonic dusted himself off as he approached her. “Hey, no problem. I’m-”

“Sonic the Hedgehog!” she interrupted. “I’ve heard all about you!”

“Have you?” he grinned. “Guess I’m getting pretty famous.”

“Yeah,” she giggled nervously.

“So, why exactly were you challenging that thing?”

“Oh! I wasn’t- I mean- I’m a fortune-teller- well, kind of, I’m just starting out- but I’ve been having all these dreams about meeting a hero on another world, and then, you know, all of this happened to Little Planet, and I heard someone was rescuing it and- well, to be honest, I was kind of hoping it would be you since I’ve heard all these stories- so, I did a tarot reading last night and as it turns out, we were destined to meet today! Well, I think it was supposed to be today- it’s my birthday. Isn’t that wonderful?” Her frantic explanation left her breathless.

“That’s, um… a lot. Happy birthday?”

Amy’s eyes lit up. “Yes it is, thank you!”

“Well, we’ve met. Glad I could help ya fulfill that fortune, but I gotta get going-”

“I’ll come with you! We’re destined to go on an adventure together!” 

No way that’s happening. Sonic backed up from her casually. “Amy, was it? You said you were new at fortune-telling, right?”

“Oh! Um, yes, sort of.”

He turned and started toward the bridge of land connecting to the other side of the valley. “So how can you be sure?”

“Huh?” she sprinted ahead to follow close behind him.

“Those cards - you’re sure you read them right?”

Amy picked up her pace to keep up. “Oh! Well, there are lots of ways to interpret the cards. It’s more about feeling. I can show them to you if you’d like,” she smiled.

The landscape changed as they crossed to the other side. In contrast with the tropical forest, this place was more developed, sporting tall metallic structures. Neon lights flashed ahead and the climate grew comfortably cooler. It was just the planet’s curious atmosphere, but the clouds above blushed a romantic pink hue as if it were suddenly dusk- or if Amy were wearing rose-colored glasses.

Sonic stopped, holding up a hand “No thanks. Anyway, tagging along is too dangerous. Eggman isn’t messing around. I think you should go home.” 

“Oh! My cards predicted there would be disaster!” she giggled gleefully, not fully aware of the possibility that she could be seriously hurt or worse.

Sonic‘s expression was somewhere between worried and annoyed. “You chose to come even though you knew it would lead to disaster?” This girl’s wacky, he thought.

She nodded bashfully. “Mhm. But I know that if we persevere through the danger, we’ll have a happy ending.”

“Look, I can’t exactly babysit right now.” Sonic didn’t have time to fully process the girl’s sudden appearance and unlikely explanation. He leaped upward toward a colorful platform with the intent to continue forward without her. “Maybe we can figure this out later. You need to go-”

Without warning, something struck Sonic’s platform, tearing it apart. He managed to hop off just in time but was too late to save Amy from the attack. In a flash, she was hoisted off the ground, screaming for her life. She was held under arm by a robotic blue hedgehog carbon-copied from Sonic’s image. Its glowing red eyes stared through Sonic’s as it floated nearby for a few seconds, taunting him as she shrieked. Amy could hear Sonic calling out her name as she was hurdled into the sky by the terrifying machine. She didn’t dare try to escape with the threat of an endless fall beneath them. So she held on as best she could, eyes and skin stinging from the high altitude’s bitter atmosphere.

-----

Cold floor. Cold walls. Cold eyes. Amy sat in a tiny steel cell somewhere in what could only be described as an evil lair. Machines buzzed and electricity crackled all around. The adrenaline from the flight was beginning to wear off and dreadful exhaustion was setting in. Her captor stood as a sentinel nearby, glaring at her menacingly. Amy forced herself to turn away from his eerie gaze, but she could feel his steely eyes on her like snow piling on her back. She did her best to keep from shivering.

“Oh, good! You’ve brought her back alive.” A harsh cackling could be heard as Eggman passed through the area. “Thank you for letting us use you as bait. Don't worry- you’ll be free to join my empire as soon as Metal here crushes Sonic,” he grinned.

Amy whipped her head around. “As if Sonic would lose to some copycat,” she scoffed. Being taken hostage was one thing, but she wasn't about to let anyone disparage her destined hero.

He laughed heartily in return. “Plucky, aren’t we? Perhaps I’ll keep you around. Metal Sonic could use a plaything.” Amy gasped at this, recoiling what that could mean. Robotnik smiled and sauntered casually over to the robot, who was still staring daggers at the girl. “Oh, forgive his rudeness. He was just activated today. Doesn’t know much in the way of manners yet,” he chuckled ironically. “Metal, there’s no need to stare. You’re making our guest uncomfortable.”

Metal Sonic shifted his focus to his master. Earlier, The Doctor had said, “don’t take your eyes off of her!” He was following orders. Perhaps this was too literal.

“Well, I have to complete some preparations before our little blue friend arrives. No roughhousing before we kill him, now! Wouldn’t want her dead before she’s fulfilled her purpose.” He continued laughing harshly as he disappeared down a hall. 

Amy felt somewhat relieved to have Metal Sonic’s robotic gaze off her, but there wasn’t much else she could be thankful for at that moment. She tried not to think about the situation she had gotten herself into. Perseverance leads to success. Just a little longer. But as she shivered pathetically in her frigid prison, she felt not only disparaged but humiliated. How could she have let herself be kidnapped? She didn’t even try to fight it- she knew she couldn’t win. What if I’m too weak? Tears forced their way out of her eyes. Maybe the cards were warning me not to come…

Metal Sonic continued watching over the girl, albeit less intensely. He had logged her image, noting the words weak and loud alongside. Now, he was more focused on calculating a route to victory against his opponent. But the change in her sparked his interest. He had never seen someone cry- he hadn’t seen much of anything yet, in fact. He only knew what he was programmed with- serve The Doctor, defeat Sonic, observe and learn. He decided to watch her a bit more closely and approached the small cell. 

Tears had escalated to a gentle sobbing by the time Metal Sonic was near. For however cold it was in that space, Amy still felt a chill before she realized how close the machine had come. She hugged herself tightly, once again forcing herself to look away. This thing didn’t need to see her looking so pitiful; she didn’t want to give it the satisfaction. Then she heard an inquisitive chime come from Metal Sonic. At least, she thought it was inquisitive. It sounded almost childlike in its curiosity- was it curiosity? Amy turned slowly, locking her wet eyes with his fiery ones. “Wh-what do you want?” she stammered.

What did he want? There was something peculiar about the way his hostage acted. Or, to put it more precisely, the way he reacted to her. It was strange; he succeeded in following his objective. What was this other feeling? Was it pity? No- It was interesting to him, that was all. He repeated his mechanical chirp, hoping to learn more.

There was something in the way he looked at her and how he sounded. It wasn’t malicious.  “Wait,” Amy sniffled, “Do you… feel bad?”

Metal Sonic was taken aback by her question. He was certainly not supposed to feel bad. He sort of shrugged and shook his head, sneering at the idea. 

“Of course not.” Amy looked defeated, kneeling on the hard floor with slumped shoulders and ruddy cheeks. The hushed weeping didn’t stop.

No, he didn’t feel bad. He couldn’t. As far as Metal Sonic was concerned, he accomplished a mission- that was indisputably correct. Positive even! Yet the consequence of his success was this miserable sight. He didn’t understand what he was supposed to feel; or why he cared. But he wanted to. So, he knelt just on the other side of the cell bars, mimicking the girl, and tapped on the flooring to get her attention.

The metallic clacking startled Amy out of her pity party. Her expression quickly turned from sorrowful to indignant. “What now?” SHe noticed his posture. “Are you making fun of me?” 

Mocking her wasn’t his intent, but the girl’s response was amusing to Metal Sonic. So temperamental. He shook his head again.

Amy’s eyes softened. Her captor couldn’t seem to do the same, a permanent scowl affixed to its face. Still, mean mug and all, she couldn’t shake the feeling that it was… genuine? Robotnik mentioned that Metal Sonic was recently activated. He just seemed like other kids her age- curious, maybe a bit naive. It gave her an idea. 

She wiped her wet face on her hand and forearm, resolved to compose herself. Metal Sonic was staring again, but it wasn’t the uncomfortable leer from earlier. It wasn’t exactly pleasant, though. “Why do you stare so much?” she asked uncomfortably.

He turned his eyes away abruptly, still facing her. He wasn’t supposed to stare- but he was supposed to watch her. Contradictory, but those were his orders. It didn’t make that much sense to him so he shrugged in response. 

“Humph. I don’t see why an evil robot should care about manners…”

Metal Sonic’s eyes shot back at her, his shoulders clenching. He resented being called evil. He wasn’t anything- or wasn’t supposed to be, anyway. His only affiliation was with his creator. The humming of his motor intensified irately.

Amy could tell immediately that he was annoyed. “What, don’t like being called evil? Maybe don’t do evil stuff like kidnapping people, then! How would you have liked it?” 

Offended, Metal Sonic crossed his arms. The very idea that he would ever be kidnapped! That only happened to lesser beings. The girl had let herself be kidnapped, no attempt even made to fight back. Not that she had much of a choice in the matter, being so much weaker. His look shifted down as he thought, realizing that she had a point. She didn’t have a choice in the kidnapping. Was it evil to take advantage of that? His shoulders slumped. Not that he cared, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it if it was...

The change in Metal Sonic’s body language was clear to Amy. “Starting to understand?” She scooted closer to him sheepishly. “You don’t have to be evil, you know. You can choose.” She watched as Metal Sonic’s glowy eyes slowly shifted back to her, somehow looking less frightening now. He saw her smile for the first time as her face softened. Fishing her tarot deck out of her pocket, she continued. “Would you like to try making a choice?”

Though he found it to be unusual given her situation, the smile was not at all unwelcomed. The small insinuation that he would ever disobey an order, however, was. He callowly believed he would never do such a thing, however evil those orders may be. Still, the implication- and her strange little deck- intrigued him and he nodded with interest.

Amy’s face brightened even more. “You were just activated today, right? So, that basically makes today your birthday! It’s mine, too,” she giggled earnestly. “My name’s Amy Rose. I bet it’s destiny that we met on our birthdays. It must mean today is a really important day for both of us. I should know, ‘cause I’m a fortune-teller.” 

She seemed exceedingly confident considering that nothing she said made a lick of sense. It was his first day being fully operational, yes, but Metal Sonic hardly considered that to be a birthday. And now she was touting her fortune-telling and talking about destiny of all things? It was all too illogical- and his desire to understand made it all the more interesting to him. He logged her name in her file and nodded along.

“So, let’s do a birthday reading! Let’s try an easy spread with three cards. Here,” she tossed the cards all on the floor, mixing them up before spreading them out neatly before him. “Ask yourself what this year will be like for you. Then choose your cards and slide them back face down. One at a time, whichever ones stand out to you.”

Whichever ones stood out? They all looked the same. He couldn’t focus on any one card, shifting his sight all across the fanned out deck.

“Don’t overthink it!” Amy interjected. “Just choose whichever ones feel right, ‘kay?” She looked at him encouragingly. 

Whichever ones feel right. Metal Sonic pondered on it for a moment. Thinking about his feelings was new- but then again, a lot of things would be new for now. Not that he was taking it seriously. After all, what could a bunch of paper tell him about his future? But looking again, there were a few cards that stood out somehow. He pushed the thought from his head and slid each of his three selections back to her.

“Great!” Amy pulled back the rest of the cards, arranging them in a neat stack. “Okay, let’s ask this first card what gift you’ll get this year. Think about that question and let me know when you’re ready to turn it.”

The girl sat eagerly in front of him, hand poised to flip the card around. He probably wouldn’t have ever thought about receiving a gift- let alone what it would be- if he hadn’t been asked to think about it now. Metal Sonic nodded once, keeping the curious question in mind.

Amy turned it excitedly- she wouldn’t volunteer the information, but this was her first time doing a reading for someone else. She was determined to make it impactful. “And it looks like you got the Ace of Cups! Wow, this is a really emotional card.” She thought for a moment, recalling what she’d read about the suit and each of its pieces. “Okay, well, Aces are all about newness, you know? This one especially represents new feelings and relationships. Oh! Maybe you’ll make a new friend. I wonder who that could be,” she giggled. “The thing about cups, though- well, I guess you have to be willing to drink from it. You have to accept the good things, and you can’t let negativity stand in your way. Does that make sense?”

He was surprised to find that it did make some sense. But surely it was a coincidence- it was too on the nose. The world was new to him, sure, but it could logically apply to anyone. He shrugged, rolling his eyes sideways. It didn’t mean anything.

A coy grin spread across Amy’s face. She could tell that he believed it, however uncomfortable it made him. “I’ll let you think about that one. Let’s ask the next card for guidance. Ask what you can do to accomplish your goals.”

Guidance hardly seemed necessary when Metal Sonic had his programming. Attaining his goals was instinct. He indulged, nodding again plainly. The card showed a somewhat macabre scene.

“Judgement. Oh, but it’s reversed for you. Hmm, I think it means you have no self-awareness,” she nodded bluntly. “But I guess that makes sense. You’re going to have to learn a lot about yourself soon and reflect on it. You might also get an opportunity that you shouldn’t pass up.”

She seemed to be looking at him expectantly. She was trying to manipulate him. It wouldn’t work, but it was pretty entertaining; respectable even. He wanted to see how the girl could spin the last card in her favor. Wondering how she manipulated him into choosing the right cards for her narrative, he nodded to continue.

Amy placed a hand on the last card. “This one’s important. The card will give you an idea of how your actions will affect your life. It pretty much represents you, so make sure to concentrate when you ask ‘who will I be this year?’” 

Not what but who. Who would he be? Metal Sonic hadn’t thought of himself as much more than a machine up until then. But there were feelings beyond thought in him- could he call them emotions? No, this wasn’t the time for an existential crisis. He would have just gotten up and returned to his post if the curiosity about the last card wasn’t so vexing. He nodded, wanting to finish the ordeal. The card’s face revealed an armored man rushing forward on a white steed. Its head pointed toward Metal Sonic. 

“The Knight of Swords. He’s ambitious, and he takes action.” Amy picked it up and held the face out at eye level. “But it’s reversed. Something’s holding him back from giving it his all. Usually, it means you’re distracted or you don’t have any real direction. Maybe your goals aren’t aligning with what you want.” She picked up the reversed Judgement, holding the two cards together. A melancholy sigh made its way out of her lips. “It might be because you haven’t had a chance to reflect on much yet. I bet it’s hard to just, I don’t know, wake up like you did? It’s like you know things, but you never had a chance to learn the lessons.” 

He stared at the cards silently, astonished by her interpretation. He wanted it to be complete nonsense, but everything she said managed to resonate. There was no doubt she manipulated the reading, but he had chosen the cards himself. They stood out as if glowing from the fanned deck just minutes earlier. It was all true- he had barely been activated and one mission later was already doubting himself, even asking himself if he was evil. He couldn’t deny the jarring nature of his existence. But what was next? Heed the advice of some colorfully decorated cardstock?

A gentle voice broke his train of thought. “You’re thinking about the reading. It’s okay, I know it can be a lot to process.” Amy moved closer, sticking her arm out from behind the bars. She was offering him the cards. “Holding them helps to understand, I think.” He took the three of them in both hands, examining the artwork. “Your next choice is whether or not you’ll listen to their guidance.”

He looked from her to the cards as he held them. Again, guidance should be the last thing a programmed machine should need- he should have been built with all the direction he needed. Yet, she took the opportunity to speak to him even after he’d wronged her. Kind. He noted it in his file of Amy Rose. 

Then the realization that he’d been neglecting his duty took over him. This nonsense about destiny and kindness was getting in the way. Besides, it was all too confusing to think about this improbable future. Yes, he was focusing on the wrong thing- there was a mission to complete. Playtime was over. Metal Sonic dropped the cards absently, resolved to stand where he was stationed and await further orders. He didn’t get that far.

“Wait!” Amy reached out to him desperately, latching onto his wrist before he could leave. “I know it’s overwhelming, but just think about it. Please.” Her eyes pleaded with him for a moment before they were interrupted.

A shrill voice announced Robotnik’s return. “Metal! It’s showtime!” He paused to take in the scene that was unfolding before him. “What’s this? Our hostage giving you trouble?” Amy unhanded Metal Sonic in a hurry and scrambled to pick up her cards. He was still half-kneeling before her but quickly stood upright at his master’s appearance. Luckily, Robotnik was in too much of a hurry to fixate on the scene. “Forget it. Metal, grab her, and let’s get going.” The cell door swung open.

Amy shot up as Metal Sonic entered. Eyes locked, she begged him once more. “You don’t have to do this,” she whispered. “You can be more than this.” It was enough to give him pause. Could she be right? Could he choose not to obey orders? He must have hesitated for a moment too long because Robotnik quickly lost his patience.

“What are you waiting for? Bring her here this instant!”

Amy’s expression of terror was not one Metal Sonic would soon forget. Nothing about it made him want to deliver her to The Doctor; He didn’t want to obey. “You don’t have any real direction,” her words echoed in his mind. Metal Sonic’s fists clenched at his side as he stood conflicted before her, his back to his master. 

“Rebelling already?” Robotnik grumbled. “Perhaps a little motivation.” He brandished a small remote and turned a dial. 

Metal Sonic seized suddenly. As if struck by lightning, sparks visibly bounced off his body before it went limp. Shocked and confused, Amy backed herself away. “What- what did you do?” she gasped. Before Robotkin could answer, Metal Sonic was upright again.

“Good to see the inhibitors working. Now grab her and get a move on!”

“No, stop!” No amount of protesting would save Amy now. Whatever he’d done to Metal Sonic appeared to erase any progress she’d made. She kicked and squirmed but was soon restrained by Metal Sonic, dragged off to whatever assembly point Robotnik had in mind for his scheme. At least this time she put up a fight.

-----

Amy could hardly tell if she was indoors or out. The drop below the scaffolding she’d been placed on was immense, though the metallic clanking below could still be heard faintly. It was dark as if night time- but there was no way the sun had time to set between her kidnapping and now. A claw-like contraption held her just a few feet off the scaffolding uncomfortably. She groaned, turning to face the heavy metal door to one side of her. She was apparently waiting for Sonic or his imposter to race through it any minute (Robotnik had assured her it would be the latter). So now she was alone, helplessly waiting to be rescued. Or not, she worried. 

She thought about the disappointment of her meeting with Metal Sonic and how quickly she’d been sabotaged. She really believed everything she’d told him- the significance of meeting on their birthdays, her predictions for his future- all of it. I guess there was never a point if Robotnik could just zap him back into a zombie. I wonder if he’ll remember anything…

There wasn’t any more time to think about it. Before Amy knew it, Sonic came racing down the pathway and through the door, skidding to a stop in front of her. The heavy door slammed shut and something crashed loudly on the other side of it. 

“Looks like I won,” Sonic grinned.

Amy’s face lit up immediately. “Sonic! You came for me!”

“Yep! All I had to do was beat that that Metal Sonic in a race. Piece of cake.” The metal claw swung open after he gave it a quick hit. 

Amy dusted herself off, turning her attention to the doorway that was now dented inward. “So, did he…”

“Crash? I guess so. Consider yourself lucky.”

I guess it was just a machine, after all, Amy reasoned. Sonic’s nonchalant response made it clear he wouldn’t be losing sleep over his victory. Besides, her fortunes were shifting. Manifestations nearing meant it wasn’t the time for distractions. She erased the thought from her mind and focused on what she’d come for. “Thank you for saving me! So, what now?”

Sonic’s self-assured grin grew wider. “We still have a planet to save. You coming?”

His words were a dream come true to the starry-eyed girl. She threw herself around him brazenly, tail wagging with glee. The affection made Sonic squirm but he remained polite, feeling guilty for allowing to be kidnapped earlier. “Of course!” she giggled. “I’ll follow you anywhere!”

-----

“Sonic freed Little Planet after that and we didn’t see you for a while. We encountered each other a few times after that, but I think this story was long enough.” Amy lounged comfortably, chin resting in her hand. She breathed in the crisp night air and sighed nostalgically. “It was over nine years ago. Man, we were all so short back then. You and Sonic are so much taller than me now...” She looked down at her dazed guest. “You okay down there?”

Metal sat slouching on the ground in front of her. He was carefully recording every last detail she’d recounted when he matched the photograph he’d logged of Amy back then to her retelling. The tense circumstances of their meeting were uncomfortable to recall. She’d even insinuated he was evil- he remembered. The day came back to him. Metal sat up suddenly at the realization.

“What is it?” He stared at her directly, unsure of how to communicate his epiphany. She snickered awkwardly, bemused by the outburst. It wasn’t long ago she’d have found that glowy leer petrifying, but now it was just amusing.

Metal placed a finger over the scratch on his forehead, concentrating on her as if he could transmit his thoughts. Her eyes widened. “Oh! Did you remember something?” He answered by tapping on the ground just as he had back then. A kind smile appeared on Amy’s face as she leaned closer to him. “Yeah, that’s how we met! Do you remember anything else?” He didn’t, so leaned back until he was parallel with the ground at her feet. Amy giggled at his response. “Not yet, huh? But hey, if my stories ring a bell then I can tell you a few more!” She paused. It occurred to her that reliving the better part of a decade in a matter of days or hours could prove to be overwhelming. “I mean if you want. We should probably take it slow.”

It was strange enough that Amy had managed to jog his memory, but her apparent ability to understand what he wanted to communicate was becoming uncanny. Even during their first encounter, she told him exactly what he needed to hear- though he regrettably hadn’t done much to listen. Metal did want to hear more, but her thoughtfulness in pacing was a relief. It was all a lot to process. There was one more thing he needed to know, however. Metal folded his hands over his chest and rolled his head over to face her. 

“I guess you’re wondering why I saved you. Sorry- did that sound kinda narcissistic?” she chuckled. Amy stretched, sitting upright. “Oh, I might as well be honest.” She combed her hand through her quills sheepishly. “So, I thought, since you’re mechanical, we could just reprogram you or something- I don’t know. But the more we hang out…” she tried finding a tactful way to approach the next part. “Well, I guess I realized I should treat you with the same respect as anyone else. I think, without all the overbearing influence, you can decide for yourself what’s right. I mean, I hope I’m not too overbearing either! But, you know. Maybe I can be there for you, if that’s okay.” 

So, she was giving him a choice. He’d seen what Tails could do; they could have easily tried to brainwash him, erasing his past forever. But he placed his trust blindly in Amy and her friends and had been rewarded with nothing but care and kindness. Now, Metal had a chance at freedom. Appearing as if he hadn't had many opportunities to make decisions for himself, he silently worried his daunting past would get in the way.  The independence felt unnatural, unfamiliar. A bit uncomfortable. But he was made for difficult tasks; Why should he shy away from this? He reached up to her, placing a hand gingerly over hers in thanks. She returned with a gentle squeeze. The embrace was chilly from the night air, but the gesture undoubtedly came from a place of warmth.

“So, do you want to stay for a while?” Amy’s welcoming smile radiated with immense charm. How could he say no?

...................................................................................

helloooooooo babes. this one took a bit; i did a lot of research on canon content and tarot. i even consulted my good friend who’s a fortune-teller. fun fact i’m too afraid to get a reading from her bc she’s always too accurate and frankly i don’t want to know what else will happen this hell year 🙃

a big thank you as always to everyone reading and sending me kind messages. it really keeps me motivated ❤️❤️❤️

[lyrazehedgieboiii]

Everything.

I wrote this story because I was in the mood. This story is kind of, kind of based off of SonamySister567′s oneshot on Wattpad, which is in a series of oneshots called Random Oneshot Collection.

Today was Amy’s birthday. She had sent texts to her friends.

No one had come.

No one replied.

Maybe they were busy? Lmao no.

The app said that they had seen the message. If so, why didn’t they respond?

Who cares? She already faces enough from that stupid blue hedgehog. Ever since that night, he had avoided her. Every single fucking time he saw her, he ran off, as if she went back to chasing him. 

She doesn’t do that anymore. She won’t cry. She couldn’t seem to. What’s the use of crying, if it won’t solve anything? 

Her friends tried to comfort her, but she would not tell them what Sonic had done. What he had left in her. Not just a broken heart, but something else as well...

...

She needed air. 

She changed into a plain black top and and black leggings, and a denim jacket on top of that. She let her long back-length quills out, and put on gold hoop earrings. She opened her garage, and pulled a black cover off of something. Something magnificent. Something she had gotten on her birthday last year. Something that could be used to escape from reality.

A red motorcycle. 

Perfect. 

She got on and drove her worries away. She knew it would catch up to her, but she had to keep on going. She wasn’t going to run away, she didn’t want to leave oh-so-suddenly. She felt the wind in her hair, and the sensation it gave her made her wish she had more time to do these kinds of things.

She heard a ‘zip’ pass on her left. She didn’t need to turn to know that it was that asshole. Nevertheless, she kept on riding.

She knew he saw her, and she knew that he slowed down to look at her. 

     “Hey, Ames!” He dares to say her pet-name. Say it like nothing had happened. Something he called her before that night. She wanted to jump off the motorcycle and pounce into his arms.

She wouldn’t.

Besides, a little part of her enjoyed avoiding her.

Let’s see if he’ll resort to begging.

She goes faster, knowing he’ll catch up. He does, in fact. She continues looking forward.

She wants peace and quiet, that blue pest just can’t seem to understand! She always gave him his space, why can’t he just do the same?

She sped up some more, and he did the same, knowing that a speed like this wasn’t even hard to catch up to in his case.

     “Ames?” He said. “Why aren’t you talking?” 

Did she have to respond?

No.

Was she going to?

Nope.

She did a donut with the bike and went to max speed, circling around the blue blur, who was confused as to what she was doing. Before he could blink, she was out of sight. She had tricked him. 

She actually managed to trick the so-called “Hero of Mobius.”

She kept on going. She wasn’t following the wind.

She was following the light.

She was following her heart, which led in the same direction. 

It led her back home. She didn’t see him around, so she put her motorcycle back to where she had once placed it, and went back inside. A breeze picked up in her home. Literally. She was picked up by the same blue blur that had the nerve to ruin her. 

He had the nerve to pick her up. 

He had the fucking nerve to run her to a cafe when she could’ve walked there herself. 

But no.

He does it anyways, placing her in a chair. Her friends came out of nowhere and all said the words she thought they had forgotten to tell her. 

“Happy birthday, Amy!”

She shook.

Not in happiness.

But in anger.

They knew she hated surprises. 

So, why did they do it?

Did they have any idea of all the pain and rejection she had to go through? The stress?

She kept a neutral expression, and simply stood up, and went to the door without saying anything. 

She didn’t want anything to happen to the growing miracle inside her. The blue blur, the rabbit, and the thieving bat blocked her way out. The two girls asking her what happened.

The edgelord and nerd joined in, as well as the knucklehead and futuristic duo. They slowly led her back to her seat. She just couldn’t allow herself to show emotion.

She didn’t want to.

    “Ames, please. Why aren’t you saying anything?” That blue son of a bitch had a pleading look in his eyes. 

Why was he pleading?

Was it just so he could talk to her? To reconnect?

Or was it just so he could get into her pants?

Either way, she wasn’t going to reply.

Why should she? He had already ignored her for weeks.

She just wanted him to feel the pain.

She screamed.

Her face fell on to the table in front of her, and refused to get up. Everyone looked to the blue blur, knowing that any of her problems usually revolved around him. 

She heard him tell everybody to give them a little privacy. She heard them go. 

There’s no way she’s forgiving him this time.

She continues to keep her head down. She felt his arms wrap around her torso, bringing her in to him. He kept saying sorry while his muzzle nuzzled into her quills. 

She wanted to push him away.

What was stopping her?

Everything. 

She couldn’t tell him.

He’d leave for real this time.

    “Amy...just tell me what happened...what did I do wrong?” The tone of his voice sounded like he was hurt and was begging to know what was wrong.

She brought her head up.

She was about to say the words.

She was about to say the words that could either excite her or make her only love leave.

She actually gathered up the courage to say it.

Does she want to? 

No. 

This was for the miracle. She wouldn’t consider it a curse, nor a mistake.

A blessing.

She was going to say it.

Sonic looked at her with those emerald eyes of his.

    “I’m pregnant.”

She didn’t say anything else. She stood up and left.

She didn’t stay to hear his reply.

Her friends went after her, chasing her until she got back home. She simply walked to her room and slammed the door. She closed the curtains, and puts her phone on silence. 

The door broke down to reveal him.

The reason why she was avoiding her friends.

The reason why she was avoiding society.

The reason why she avoiding reality.

She turned to her side, knowing there was no escape.

He walked up to her bed, and sat on it.

They had done a lot on that bed.

His hands around her once again.

He chuckled.

He had the fucking nerve to laugh. When she was in pain.

    “Why are you laughing?!” She asked, her voice sounding a bit hoarse.

    “Because I’m going to be a dad!” He laughed harder and snuggled into the crook of her neck. “Why were you so upset about it though?” He questioned her. 

She was outraged.

How dare he.

     “What do you mean, I was so upset?! I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you’ve been ignoring me for the past couple weeks!” She yelled at him.

He didn’t flinch. As if he knew this was coming.

     “First of all, Ames, please don’t stress. It isn’t good for the baby! Second, I thought you needed space after that night, so I decided to give it to you!”

    “SPACE?! If anything, you should’ve been with me! You weren’t there the next morning! You acted like I didn’t exist!” She broke.

She let the helpless tears out.

They weren’t helpless.

She wasn’t helpless.

Those tears were of pain, rejection, and stress. Something that he had never felt.

He felt pain, but it was always physical. Sure, he might get sad over a loved one, but he doesn’t know how it feels to be rejected, and have the thought that he would only be able to love the child growing inside him. He felt stress, but it wasn’t unhealthy for him. It wouldn’t harm anything developing in his stomach.

Nothing he felt could harm a child.

Especially an unborn one.

However, his actions could.

    “I’m sorry. I’m a jackass, an asshole, a son of a bitch, and I avoided you when I could’ve been supporting you. Supporting us. Especially with the little one on the way.” He told her. The way he said it. He sounded genuine. Amy still loved him, and he seemed to love her back.

Everything would stop her from pushing him away.

Her heart, 

Her mind,

Her baby,

Everything.

    “I love you, Sonikku~” She found herself saying. Sonic smiled, a tear shedding from his eye, while a hundred from her’s.

    “I love you too, Ames. Once our little bundle is born, we’re going to get married, have more kids, lots more~!” Sonic exclaimed whimsically. He meant it. 

Before she could blink, he pulled out a ring.

A ring that would promise her that they’d seal the deal eventually.

Because everything about him made her love him.

Everything about her made him love her.

(Look at all the bolded words, they make a sentence from start to end.)

[cutegirlmayra]

Amy Rose Prompt: Strong

It’s a birthday week! I just thought of this one while watching some inspiring and emotional scenes from all different types of animation. I guess my birthday wish is for characters that I’ve longed to see have a ‘strong impacting moment’ have them again sometime in the future that pumps us all up to cheer for them!

Commissions and prompts are open, but if you’ve submitted 3 ideas already, please hold off and let others have a try! :Db Thank you!

Prompt:

“Metal Sonic!!!” Amy spread her legs into a balanced stance. Her scuffed up boot dug deeper into the ground to give her a firm footing. The wind howled like a forlorn cry as she brought her hammer up, beginning to twirl it around herself as she did when she miraculously deflected Eggman’s canon-fire.

Metal Sonic was already going after his first priority: Sonic.

However, this little pink hedgehog was proving to be quite the nuisance.

He stopped in his departure and turned to see her still rearing to fight, but his scanners only saw her as an annoyance, not a threat.

The image of Rosy the Rascal was engraved in his memory, Amy Rose could not change his view of her. Pathetic.

“I won’t let you run!” she cried out, feeling the ache in her back and to alleviate some of it’s pressure, she hunched forward just slightly. “You will never be like Sonic The Hedgehog!”

It’s head turned with a creek of its steel, and its eyes blazed red in a heated acknowledgement of her words.

She found a moment to take a step forward, pushing herself to make him see her, to defeat the doubts that told her she could be destroyed trying to take him on.

“I’ve decided something, Metal... I’ve decided... I’m not going to try and redeem you.” she squinted her eyes, feeling her heart grow heavy as she admitted that.

He continued to stare at her, now fully turning his body towards her.

“Instead, I’m going to defeat you!” She took her existing hammer and swung it out, making it grow even larger than when Eggman had tried to trap her in that cavern.

“I could only make that decision because I knew two things, Metal Sonic! One, that you will never measure up to Sonic!”

Metal Sonic’s body hunched over, twitching in his rage.

“And secondly... Not just that... but that you don’t have a heart to redeem.” She turned to a moment of tenderness, as though still wishing that weren’t the case. “You’re true to following your programming, and being what you are... a villain. No, worse than that, a villain’s puppet... bent on being nothing more than a nuisance in this world!” She stepped forward again, “So no matter what I say to you, no matter how hard I try and teach you about friendship and the beauty found in this intangible world... you will only hate. Comparing yourself to Sonic, you are nothing like him! He taught Tails how to fly a plane!” she sped herself back into a ready stance as he charged her. It was like he was teleporting, how fast he moved.

He sent a slashing hand through to her center but she reflexed to holding her hammer like a sword engaging against a metallic shredder.

“Grr...Urk... HARRRAH!!!” she threw him off, and he flew back a moment.

“He brought Knuckles out of his isolation!” She swung her hammer to deflect his version of a homing-attack.

All the while, he was moving her back down the mountain, as though proving a point... she could never face him head-on...

As though mocking her for trying, he kept his next consecutive attacks with full force but slower, allowing her to block and continue to be pushed back by his power.

“Urk, gah... ha!” she blocked again and again, trying to swipe at him but he expertly would dodge her.

Zooming in to grab her hammer, he decided now would be a good time to boost his thrusters and send her farther back down the rocky cliff.

“AHHH!!!” he shoved her down and the hardness of the rock scraped against her bareback side.

He tried to pull the hammer out of her grasp, but she held on, making him pull her up as she took a foot and jammed it above his rotating center core, burning with fuel to allow him to operate.

She kicked off and he willingly let go... to him, this was mere child’s play. Just a way to shake her off his tail while he continued to hunt down Sonic.

She landed well but felt herself start to strain. ‘Not now...’ she got herself back up, ‘Not yet.’ she took her hammer in both hands, moving it clumsily over her shoulder.

“Y-you forget... or you don’t know-!” she bent herself, getting ready for the biggest home-run of her life. “Who taught me to fight..!” she charged forward, and underestimating her momentary rest, Metal Sonic leisurely lifted a hand to stop her but was slammed down by the unforeseen force that came with her hit.

He was knocked to the side, his eye-lights shaking due to his mental computer unable to compute what had just happened.

“He helped me to never give up!” she swung again, forcing him back to his feet and then slammed him down once more, “He taught me that you make your own destiny!!! The way you envision it! The way you want it to be!”

She kept hammering into him, and soon, as he began to step back... unable to brace himself from her impacts, he was losing pieces of his metal hide one after the other.

He stumbled, tripped, and fell over himself with each massive hit she threw at him... now he was the one getting pushed back up the mountain’s side...

“You will never be like him... because you don’t know what’s it like! You’ll never understand what Sonic has learned from us! What we’ve gained from him!” she continued to wham him with sensational fury and continual endurance, a steady show of power that only ever increased with each new powerful hit of her Piko Piko Hammer.

Amy’s swings became more and more rapid, but still carried so much weight in every blow.

Metal Sonic’s systems began to glitch out on his eye-lights, unable to process the progression of how far the battle had turned.

“Maybe it’s all Eggman’s fault... or maybe you truly just want to watch the whole world burn... but either way... There can only be one Sonic that lasts in my heart!” She brought the hammer over her head, and a crack of thunder burst from behind her, traveling like a spiderweb through the dark sky.

But it was that moment that Amy hesitated, breathing hard as her compassionate heart got the better of her.

Her eyes loosened from their fierce anger and narrowed bridge, realizing how awful she must appear.

She saw Metal Sonic struggling to get up, one of his eyes dented by her strikes and the other glaring up at her.

“...I’m no monster...” She stepped away, breathing out as the mental image of herself appeared in her mind. “I’m no villain... I’m just a hedgehog... who can’t stand to see people suffer around her...”

Within Metal Sonic’s programming, the image of Rosy the Rascal was being infiltrated, as Metal Sonic began to override his own logic and erase her image from his memory core... replacing it with that terrifyingly powerful stance Amy held before... and blurred out the threat level... having it massively bolded and blaring red: MAJOR THREAT.

“I’m not you.” she hissed out, seeing him shoot himself into the air, and charge his stomach-engine with a growing energy ball...

She remembered... pleading to the Chaos Emeralds to let her go super, and having her wished denied.

Even though she remembered... she held out her hand... “Chaos...”

Metal Sonic threw his arms back, bringing the the charge to the height of its power!

“...Please...” she squinted her eyes in the brightness of his blast that she knew she wouldn’t be able to escape or dodge from.

The Master Emerald flared to life, spiraling out from around it one of the Chaos Emeralds, a orange light spinning with it as it trailed a beautiful glow of chaos energy.

Tikal’s ghostly image appeared behind the flying emerald, moving like a comet towards her open hand to the side. “Amy..!” her voice cried out to her.

As the beam of Metal Sonic’s energy cascaded down like a vigorous wall of molten heat... The Chaos Emerald zipped to Amy’s side, and she caught it.

“CONTROL!!!!” Amy held up the emerald as time itself broke the fabric of space and reality and pushed her through its limits to appear twisting behind Metal Sonic.

He tried to turn around to her, but it was too late.

With one arm, her quills lingering up in the intensity of the moment, Amy crashed her hammer into his back, crunching the circuitry and snapping the tense wires out of place. Electricity burst from his being as he came smacking down into the earth below... Into the very crater of a grave he created for himself...

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” Amy gave her everything to that attack, the Chaos Emerald’s glow ceased and she began to fall through the air.

“Ha...ha... oh no!” She looked around her, realizing taking out Metal Sonic was now the least of her worries. She had been transported thousands of feet into the air, and now... she was plummeting down at accelerated speeds.

“Sonic...” her eyes watered, before she clutched the Chaos Emerald again, “Chaos control!” her trembling hands from the wind pressure exposed its gloss form only to reveal it was still dull of any influence from her voice command... Her eyes widened, “This can’t be...” she squinted her eyes against the wind force again, “CHAAOOSSS!!! Control!” she tried again, turning it up towards the sky but nothing...

“S...S...Soooniiiccc!!!” she released the emerald from her hand, bundling her fists up to her chest and crying out her hero’s name...

In her most dire moment... a shimmer sparked like a star igniting far from her soul... but a sonic boom pulsed through the air as a figure--launched like a missile--swooped in an arch to grab her before she met her end.

She felt the lapping wind as the figure began to come to a screeching halt, trying to slow its momentum down before she felt herself blackout a moment.

When her limp body came too, she blinked to see a glowing figure above her. “-y...Amy..! Amy!”

Her eyes adjusted... and the bright being before her... was her Sonic.

“Amy, are you alright?” He was leaning over her, his two hands holding him up above her resting body, laying her down by the side of the cold mountain...

“Where’s Metal Sonic..?” He seemed concerned, and a gentle smile lifted to her face as her eyes glistened from his warm light.

“Sonic... I... I did it.” Her voice was barely above a whisper, but it was soft and gentle, something he wasn’t used to.

To show this, he leaned back a moment, his eyes widening in surprise by her sudden expression.

She was so full of gratitude, so content in helping her friends from the threat of Metal Sonic...

His smoking head rest deactivated, after having his form split apart and tumble loose down the rocky cliffs of the mountain’s proud face.

She was proud... but would he be?

“I beat him...” she gave a more fuller grin to her already exhausted and drained complexion. “Now... you’re the only Sonic...”

The only one that mattered.

Sonic’s image was blurring again.

“W-wait...” she wanted it to stay... but in that blurr, it focused only briefly to a proud smile on Sonic’s face, a happy expression.

“Thank you...” He began, as she blinked her eyes softly again, the world darkening once more. “Amy...”

[breakingsomething]

to remember

basic summary: marvin's spiraling.

trigger warnings: mentions of abuse and self harm, flashback to a suicide attempt, much talk of medications, violent thoughts, themes of memory loss, extreme distress

it started with little things.

first he'd forget where he left stuff, like his phone or his cup of tea. that was just normal. but then he'd forget having ownership of certain items altogether. chase had once gotten mad at marvin for leaving a full mug next to his laptop, and it had taken five minutes for marvin to remember he'd made the drink in the first place.

as the weeks went by, thing continued to slip his mind. just small things. street names, words he should know, inside jokes from a while ago. he'd stumble before saying the name of an old friend, hesitate before mentioning that so and so had blonde hair because hadn't they dyed it, or had that been year ago? which of chase's kids liked sonic the hedgehog again? oh, chase kids were missing and he shouldn't bring them up? yeah. he'd forgotten that too.

then it was his medication. he'd been prescribed small tablets of paroxetine to take every day, which he'd done at the beginning. then he'd get so caught up with other things that it'd only be every few days that he'd remember the meds and a jolt of realization would hit him that he hadn't taken them in ages. but it was fine. he'd set a reminder on his phone! which worked for a while, until he'd read the notification and swipe it away with the intention to get up right away, but then get distracted, or even if he didn't get rid of it it would just get buried in his notifications bar and he wouldn't think twice. but it was fine! he was just a bit forgetful. silly billy marvin. so what if he sometimes forgot what his girlfriend looked like or when henrik's birthday was? that was normal, silly stuff. he was just fine.

"marvin, how long has it been since you've eaten?"

oh, someone was talking to him! he startled at the sound, whipping round in the kitchen doorway to face whoever it was and breathing a sigh of relief as he recognized him. jackie. his sweet big brother jackie, big brother who helped him keep his head on straight and comforted him through nightmares of events that marvin wasn't sure had really happened. how much of reality was he making up anymore? he wasn't sure.

"i just ate this morning," marvin said certainly, flashing the hero a smile. "what about you? i haven't seen you eat recently at all."

jackie crossed his arms, narrowing his dark eyes underneath his glasses. "me, chase and henrik ate breakfast together this morning. we had toast and wheetabix with bananas cause chase is on another health kick. where were you?"

marvin's confident grin slipped. "i - i had toast too," he said, trying to keep his voice steady so as not to reveal his uncertainties. "this morning. you guys must have - left."

marvin's heart was racing as he racked his brain. he had eaten, hadn't he? oh, oh, he didn't know. jackie's disapproving gaze was burning into him, making him feel smaller and smaller, like a child on the receiving end of a lecture.

"you can't skip meals, marvin," jackie sighed. he tilted his head and slowly reached his hand up to marvin's face, touching his forehead. even with the warning, marvin flinched. "are you feeling alright? apparently a lack of hunger or a feeling of sickness are side effects of the new medication, so -"

"shut up, jackie!" marvin hissed, face flushing. jackie raised an eyebrow at marvin's response, and the magician unconsciously flinched again. fuck, what was wrong with him lately? he knew jackie wasn't going to hurt him.

"there's no need to be embarrassed about medication," jackie said coolly. "i take paxil for my anxiety. it's nothing to be ashamed about."

"i know," marvin mumbled. he rubbed his skin comfortingly beneath his hoodie, wincing at the feeling of the scars all up his arm. self inflicted. couldn't blame anti for that. "it's not - i don't know. i'm new to all this. the whole - the whole…"

"mental illness thing?" jackie said with only a small hint of amusement in his voice. marvin snorted. the situation wasn't funny at all, so they had to make it that way themselves for it to be survivable.

he hummed, not looking jackie in the eye. another thing he was struggling with lately. he had always been good with things like that, something he excelled in that jackie did not. something else that had been taken from him. "i don't know. my head feels a bit weird all the time, but i don't think i'm sick. i should be ok, but, uh, thank you for the concern."

jackie kicked at a broken panel of wood on the floor, still not moving out of marvin's way. "speaking of medication," he said, and marvin's heart sank. "have you been taking them?"

"yes, jackie," marvin lied, swallowing hard, clenching and unclenching his fists. he couldn't stay still, why couldn't he stay still? his legs were shaking. "taken them every day."

"you're lying," jackie said flatly. marvin breathed in sharply at the undertone of disappointment in his voice, and just managed to look up at his face, cringing at how tired jackie looked. he rubbed at the bridge of his nose, pushing up his glasses. "henrik says you would have needed a refill by now if you had been taking them regularly. but you've barely touched the second packet."

marvin shook his head, breaths quickening. "i - yes i have. i finished the whole box." he'd dump them somewhere when he got a chance alone.

jackie sighed, shaking his head. "stop it, marvin. i looked in your room yesterday. the box was on your desk."

marvin gave a strangled cry. "you - you were in my fucking room? when i wasn't there?" god, he sounded like a child. but jackie knew that things were different after anti. marvin needed his space. he glared at his brother angrily, mouth hanging open with words he couldn't get out. "you fucking asshole, i thought you were going to respect my fucking privacy?"

jackie grimaced, scratching the back of his neck. "we're - we're worried for you, and -"

marvin didn't even say another word. he just shoved past his brother and stormed upstairs, slamming the door behind him.

sometimes he didn't remember his brother's names. that was just something that happened sometimes though, right? sometimes he forgot his street name. that was just a funny little mishap though, wasn't it? sometime he woke up and didn't know where he was and cried himself softly through his panic attack, curled up in the middle of his bed, too afraid to move in case someone came to hurt him, until he passed out from the headache that all the tears ended up giving him. that was normal though, wasn't it? just a silly little one time thing. it didn't mean anything. it could happen to anyone.

and then it happened again. and again. and again.

he awoke from nightmares he didn't remember. he thought about names that meant nothing to him, mouthing the words "dapper" and "naomi" and "jack" to himself. he held knives and thought about stabbing himself in the chest with them just to see what would happen. he shut himself in his wardrobe, shaking so hard he couldn't breath, feeling something hot drooling onto his neck.

the others began to properly notice the day marvin got lost.

he was just going to the corner shop. he bought a bottle of milk, a loaf of bread and a small packet of gum. he left the shop and was instantly hit with a dizzying wave of vertigo, like he was standing on top of a building. he didn't know where he was. he didn't know.

it was fine. there were three streets that branched off of this one, he was bound to belong on one of them. eeny, meeny, miney, mo, and he set off down the street to the left, which went down a small hill. that street then branched off into two other streets, and a long flight of stairs. marvin stared at them, head spinning.

he was suddenly so fucking scared.

he set off down the street to the left again. this one was sloping even further down a hill, tall, pretty looking houses with trimmed gardens and shiny cars parked neatly outside. marvin didn't live in a house, did he? he was certain he lived in a flat. there were flats somewhere in the distance, he could see. he set off towards them purposely, milk carton smacking against his thighs painfully.

it was so quiet. marvin felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise, his chest tightening painfully. he wasn't supposed to be here. he wasn't supposed to be here. someone was going to stop him and tell him to turn around and he was lost, he was scared, and -

and the road ahead branched off into three separate roads, all of which were lined by blocks of identical flats.

he wasn't going to cry. he wasn't. he set off straight ahead, down a hill, frantically looking at the buildings around him. it was early spring, and some families were out in the gardens, playing in sprinklers and having barbecues. marvin was too hot in his long hoodie, sleeves covering the ugly scars on his arms. he couldn't breathe. he couldn't remember. nothing was familiar and the world was upside down and he was fucking terrified, was this a prank? was this a prank for his brother's youtube channel - which brother had a youtube channel, why couldn't he remember, he was scared, oh, he was scared!

eventually he collapsed in an empty bus stop, just across from a construction site surrounded by a red fence. he remembered that. there was a field behind it, and there was an abandoned waterworks, and a farm with lots of cows. he rapped his knuckles on his thighs, trying to ground himself. what else could he remember? he knew his own name. marvin mcloughlin, that was him. he tipped his head back and let out a shaky sob, stomach churning. nothing was right. he was too hot and the milk had gone warm and his palm was sweaty from holding the bread.

he sat there for an hour, numbly watching the sun go down. his head hurt from crying. he was too hot and tired and scared and he felt like a fucking child. marvin sat up, scrubbing at his eyes with his sleeve, scratching his sensitive skin. his mind felt like soup.

my name is marvin mcloughlin. i'm twenty nine years old. i have been on this planet for three years. i'm bisexual. i have three brothers. i have a girlfriend named naomi gudmundson. i used to be part of an organization called hecate's international network of magic.

-

it was night before his mind returned to him.

he fucking sobbed when it did, immediately scrambling to his feet and racing in the direction his mind was telling him to go before he forgot it. the milk and bread bashed his sides as he ran, and he definitely looked like a goddamn idiot, crying and darting through the streets with his shopping in hand. by the time he got to a street he recognized, a street he remembered, he was full blown sobbing, so hard it was difficult to catch a breath. and oh, when he saw chase sitting at the window on his ds, marvin could have cried out in relief. his little brother must have sensed him coming and turned to look at him, grinning, but his face fell as soon as he saw what state marvin was in. he leapt down from the window and disappeared, and marvin fell against the front door, not caring anymore if anyone saw him. he was scared, he was just so scared, he was just so, so scared.

as soon as the lock clicked and the door swung open, marvin threw himself into chase's arms, dropping the warm milk and crushed bread to the floor. "chase, chase, chase, chase!" he gasped, heart racing as his legs gave out, feeling like jelly. "oh my god, chase, chase..."

"what happened?" chase cried, clearly alarmed. he ran his hands across marvin's back soothingly, knowing not to touch his hair in case he set him off further. "did someone hurt you? do you need henrik? marvin, talk to me."

he couldn't talk. he was so overwhelmed, so fucking terrified out of his mind that he couldn't manage words, he just couldn't. all he could do was dry heave, coughing into his arm but still trying to cling to his brother because if he didn't he would disappear and marvin would be alone again and he couldn't be alone again he couldn't anti would get him anti would hurt him and dapper again and he'd punish him because kitten had disobeyed the rules and cut off his hair and anti would make him go into the spare room by himself again without anyone to touch him or talk to him fuck fuck fuck he was so scared!!!

he slept in jackie's bed that night. he couldn't speak, too overwhelmed, too afraid he'd be punished. he curled into a ball and hugged himself, confused and delirious, too shocked to speak. anti in his head. anti in his bed. dapper, anti, kitten, which name was his again? none of them sounded right.

everything came crashing down on him the next morning when he woke.

oh, oh, oh, had that all really happened? had he really gotten lost going to the corner shop, had he really had an hour long panic attack in broad daylight while clutching a bottle of milk and a bag of bread? a slapping wave of humiliation washed over him, and he shuddered, sitting right up in bed. was that real, had he made it up? he groaned softly, clutching his head. let it have been a nightmare, please, please.

he knew it hadn't been when jackie woke up and immediately started badgering him.

"who hurt you?" were his first words. "who upset you? what happened, why were you gone so long, tell me!"

"no one hurt me," marvin croaked. he hadn't spoken in hours, and his voice was hoarse. he curled tightly into himself, gently gracing his fingers across the skin of his neck to soothe himself. "just my own head. just my own head, jackie, jackie, jackie."

the conversation went by in a blur. marvin couldn't remember it.

my name is marvin mcloughlin. i'm twenty nine years old. i have been on this planet for three years. i'm bisexual. i have four brothers. i have a girlfriend named naomi. i used to be part of an organization called hecate's network of magic.

-

he didn't care what his brothers thought anyway. he was fine. it was just a silly memory lapse. ptsd? henrik, you're being ridiculous. jackie, don't agree with him! is anyone here on my side? chase? well, fuck you guys, i don't need you! no more doctors, no more doctors, i don't need you!

naomi was there for him. naomi, his best friend, his girlfriend, girlfriend, there was a change! he'd never loved that word more than now. he'd never loved her more than now. she was wonderful. she didn't treat him like he was fragile. he loved her.

"so how've you been?" she asked one morning when he was round at her shop, nai's blomma magi, yet again. he was there often, especially as of late. he didn't want to be around his brothers. all they did was talk in hushed voices and look away when he entered a room and speak to him gently like he was a bratty child. naomi didn't. naomi looked at him like he was her best friends and she loved him. he was so grateful for her. he thought she was the string holding him to the earth to stop him flying away.

"i've been good," he said cheerfully, swinging his legs on the counter where he was perched. naomi leapt up next to him, blowing upwards to push her caramel hair from her face. marvin wasn't used to it being so short. he thought it looked pretty. he stretched out a hand to run through it as he spoke, because they were dating and he could do that now, though he kept his eyes trained on naomi's despite how hard it was for him just in case she showed any signs of not liking what he was doing. "been busy. lots to do these days you know." he shot her some finger guns. "vibing."

she chuckled, rolling her eyes and shifting closer to him, knocking their legs together. "oh, the usual then," she joked, returning the finger guns. ""it be like that sometimes" and all that? are those the vibes, pye?"

he snorted, elbowing her side. "i am begging you to stop trying to use teen lingo. or - is lingo a word people use anymore? god, i don't fucking know. my point is please, please stop this madness."

she took his face in hand and titled it towards her, booping her nose against his. "ah, but you love me and my attempts at speaking like i am generation z," she laughed. "don't deny."

he knocked his forehead to hers, realizing how unprofessional they would look to anyone who might come inside. but honestly, he didn't care. he had no dignity left to lose. "i do love you," he murmured, before gently pressing his lips to hers, fingers brushing her warm cheeks. he couldn't stop himself from grinning ridiculously, giggling slightly as he pulled away. "ah, naomi, i'm bad at this."

"i'm no better," she admitted. her dark eyes flickered from marvin's lips to his eyes, making him automatically glance down at their entwined hands despite wanting to continue looking at her face. "i haven't had a relationship in years. what do we do? i mean, i won't lie, i enjoy what we're doing now. just this."

he kissed her again, just wanting to be close to her, not wanting to think. "naomi, naomi," he said softly against her lips, like a chant, like he was an actor memorizing his lines. "love you, naomi, naomi."

"that's my name," she whispered, her breath warm on his face. her fingers traced the scar on marvin's lip, the one anti had given him that day he tried to run away and he had made dapper slash his face with his knife as punishment. "you have a pretty name too, marvin. i should say it more often. marvin, marvin, marvin."

he felt light as a feather all of a sudden, like the air had been let out of him with just one stab of a knife to the face. marvin, marvin. forbidden. he didn't know that name.

he pulled away. stared into those chocolate eyes, his vision blurring as his exhaustion began to catch up to him. marvin, marvin, marvin, he didn't know a marvin.

"i don't understand," he mumbled.

the woman frowned, eyebrows furrowing. "what's wrong? pye, are you ok? you've gone very pale."

his fingers had gone very numb. he clumsily pushed himself off the counter, head swimming dizzily, his body moving sluggishly like he was wading through honey. "i'm not meant to be here," he slurred, tongue too big in his dry mouth. "i can't - i don't understand."

anti, anti, there was a name he knew. where did he go, kitten didn't know where he was or what he was doing - pye? pye wasn't his name. he didn't know what was. anti would know.

"marvin," his girlfriend was saying, naomi something, naomi gudmundson, his best friend. "marvin, hey, calm down, it's - uh, it's ok, i'm here. i - do you have your phone? i'm going to call jackie."

her voice was so lovely. marvin remembered days spent hypnotized out his mind, so desperately trying to remember the girl who called him names he wasn't allowed to know in his dreams, the two of them performing magic together. kitten wasn't allowed to perform magic anymore. his hands burned, and he clutched them tightly to his chest, tears forming in his eyes.

his phone had fallen out his pocket. "password, marvin," she asked, but he didn't know. he was suddenly so deep in his own head that he didn't know where or who he was. he was dimly aware of someone taking his hand and pressing one of his fingers to a sensor, of words being spoken, of a man with anti's face arriving and walking him home, of babbling tearfully about monsters and names and memories and girls in his dreams and twins who spoke with hands and charcoal and chocolate eyes and knives slitting his face and ropes and chains and predictive dreams and a man who held him tightly, crying, whispering "marvin, it's ok, it's ok, it's ok."

my name is marvin. i'm twenty something years old. i have been on this planet for three years. i'm bisexual. i have five brothers. i have a girlfriend. i used to be part of an organization called hecate.

-

they took him to a doctor.

jackie went with him. he was the only one marvin trusted, the one who's reddish hair and dark blue eyes and splattering of freckles across scarred cheeks was most comforting, warm, safe. the doctor's name was - something. she was kind, dark hair and glittering black eyes. she asked him questions. "have you been in any accidents recently?" she started in a tinny american accent. like chase. chase had an american accent.

jackie answered for him. "he's recently had a bad concussion, fell down the stairs and hit his head. that's the main thing we can think of."

that wasn't true. and yes, jackie and henrik had argued about lying. "they could incorrectly diagnose him, and then he could be put on the wrong medications, he's already on antidepressants and we can't risk something making his condition any worse!" henrik had cried. "this won't work!"

"then what do we say - "our brother deeply hypnotized him and locked away a ton of his memories, gaslighting him so badly he didn't remember his own name for like three days?" no!" jackie had hurled back. "a concussion is something more easy to explain. i can fake hospital records, aaron can help me if i need it, and -"

"we can't fake this!" henrik despaired. "this is a genuine problem, this is his life, we can't just fake hospital records and hope they magically come up with the correct diagnosis based on the lies you tell them -"

"this isn't your thing, hen, this is marvin and i am doing what's best for him -"

marvin had been sitting at the top of the stairs listening to them fight. he rubbed his burning hands together, wincing at the pain of the contact. how long had it been since he'd been able to use his magic? months. but he couldn't use it. he'd get in trouble. it wouldn't be ok, though. anti would let him use his magic before he exploded.

chase came to sit next to him. "i'm sorry," he said softly. "this is - shitty, i know."

everyone was always sorry. marvin shoved his hands between his knees and didn't respond until chase got the point and walked away again.

eventually, they had just gone with the concussion story.

the doctor turned back to him, smiling reassuringly. marvin fucking hated her. "does anyone in your family have a history of alcohol or drug misuse?" she asked.

chase, marvin dimly thought. then she realized he didn't mean that. "don't have parents," he said hollowly. "all i have is -"

"- is us," jackie interrupted, shooting marvin a look. "our parents are dead. there was no history of any of that, no. not that i'm aware of."

she glanced at her computer, ponytail swinging as she turned in her chair. "i see you're currently taking paroxetine, two 10mg tablets per day?" she asked, and marvin nodded. "have you had a history of mental health issues before this?"

"recently got diagnosed with depression," marvin mumbled, looking at his purple boots.

"have you ever self harmed or made a suicide attempt?"

"what does this have to do with memory loss?" jackie suddenly snapped, squeezing his brother's hand. marvin smiled, but shook his head at him, clearing his throat.

"it's ok, jackie," he said softly, and turned to the doctor again. "uh...yes to both."

"ok, ok." she was silent for a moment as she typed. "i don't see a log here for… any time recently. when did you make said attempt?"

a knife that anti hadn't taken back. he was out, gone away doing whatever he did, and marvin was in the bathroom, blade pressed to his wrist. it could all be over. dapper, brother, don't rewind, i want this to be permanent.

marvin turned to jackie, panicked. the older man immediately spoke up, leg bouncing rapidly. "i - last year, around july. he - there should be records, uh, i can see…"

jackie's boyfriend was going to be busy with these fake records, marvin thought, amused. records for a concussion, records for a suicide attempt - marvin hadn't yet met aaron, the man who had swept jackie off his feet while he was away, but he got the feeling the poor bastard was going to think he was a total nutjob.

no, that wasn't a nice word. naomi wouldn't like him using that word. a pang of guilt went through him; he'd left naomi for a full year with no explanation, kissed her a few times, freaked the fuck out and dipped. maybe she'd think he was insane too. no, no, bad word. he shouldn't be thinking such things about himself. naomi would never think that.

the doctor asked him a few memory related questions: what he'd had for breakfast, what his parents names were ("jack and… donna," he'd said), his address, ect ect. then he did something called a "mental state examination" that honestly felt like a test at school. he did a quick physical exam. then they'd asked to draw his blood.

that had been an immediate no from marvin.

"you - you can't do that," he stammered, pulling his hands inside his sleeves and wrapping them around himself. just the thought of someone coming near him with a sharp object sent him into an immediate sweat, his fight or flight instincts kicking in. "i - i don't like - i can't do that."

the doctor sighed. "we have to test for certain things, such as vitamin b-12 deficiency and thyroid disease," she said, like she was reciting from memory. "although given all i've heard, i think we may be able to diagnose you, but we have to make sure. we'll likely still have to do an mri to make sure."

"i can't do the blood, i can't do the blood," marvin chanted. he was shaking so ridiculously hard. when did he get this pathetic, this weak? "i - i'm sorry, i'm sorry, can't have sharp objects, jackie, jackie, jackie -"

jackie took his both his hands, glancing at the doctor helplessly. "he - he gets scared around sharp objects," he said apologetically. "marvin, hey, it's ok. no blood today, no blood."

"we'll have to reschedule if we can't do this today," she sighed again. marvin was getting sick of her doing that. "can we do tomorrow at… right before ten? maybe five two? that's when the trucks come to take away samples, and results would be quicker if we could get it done sooner."

jackie hesitated. "marvin?"

marvin couldn't breath. couldn't breath. "no, no, no, i didn't do anything wrong," he sobbed, flapping his hands in a circle with his eyes screwed up tight. "don't hurt me, i didn't mean it, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, leave me alone -"

he thought he blacked out. memories were fuzzy. days passed, maybe. maybe he got his blood drawn somehow. he didn't fucking know. time meant nothing anymore.

my name isn't mine. i'm too old. i have been on this planet for so long. i'm real, maybe. i have a lot of brothers. i have people who i think love me. i used to be somebody.

-

they diagnosed him with ptsd and memory loss. then he got started on donepezil as well as his paroxetine. two medications for two of the many things that were wrong with him.

he visited naomi and told her the truth.

"i lied to you," he said. he stood in front of the counter like a customer, eyes dry and voice flat. "i wasn't staying with a friend last year. i told you that because the truth is fucking awful and i didn't want to burden you with that."

naomi looked unsurprised, but concerned. she frowned, raising her hand like she was going to touch him, but held back. "marvin," she said softly, and the name grounded him. "you can tell me anything."

she shut shop for the day and he told her.

they were both crying by the end of it. it was a lot, to be fair; marvin had years of trauma to unload, though most of it had happened within the last year and a bit. he almost expected her to kick him out - he was damaged goods, too fucked in the head to even function without constantly being doped up on meds. but she never did. instead, she pulled him in for a proper hug, kissing the side of his head and gently rubbing his back. "marvin mcloughlin," she said, naomi said. "i can't even put into words how fucking sorry i am that all that happened to you, i - my fucking shit, that's so horrible."

marvin had been so unbelievably touch starved for so long that for a moment all he could do was linger in her arms, stunned, eyes so full of unfallen tears that he couldn't see. "please don't let go," he choked out, and he was still scared, but he knew her, had known her for a long time, and trusted her with his life. he somehow always had. maybe he'd fallen in love with her the moment they'd met. "you don't hate me. you don't hate me?"

he heard her snort, shocked. "you think i would - hate you for what?" she almost laughed, her short hair brushing marvin's forehead and getting caught in his barrettes. "marvin, you are more than just my boyfriend. you're my goddamn best friend and i love you more than i ever have loved anyone, and that is - väldigt läskigt, i am forgetting english. but i would never, ever hate you. well, do you - do you want the truth?"

he nodded into his shoulder, the movement making the tears overflow and spill down naomi's back. he quickly scrubbed at his face, embarrassed, but naomi hardly seemed to notice. she buried her face into marvin's neck, her voice slightly muffled as she spoke her next words.

"i was so lost when you left," she murmured. "i had made you my anchor. i blamed myself for you leaving; blamed my bpd, blamed all the depressive states you'd seen me go through, blamed all the mania you'd had to talk me out of. but you know what? i got a therapist and i learned i couldn't blame myself for the actions of others and i continued to love you every second you were gone. i knew you'd be back. i did. i never doubted you and i loved you, so so much, and with the help of my therapist i think i figured it all out."

she sat up, knocking her nose against marvin's. "you are a person and not an anchor. not a - a puppet or a magician for your brother to use. you are a person and so am i and this makes no sense, i don't even know if i'm speaking english but i do know i have always loved you and always will and i'm so glad you're alive."

and it was those words that finally broke marvin. he let out a noise that was almost a wail of despair, shoulders shaking as his chest heaved against naomi's body. she was crying too, he could hear her. so for a long while they just held each other through the pain, and eventually marvin wasn't sad or mourning, he was just hugging his best friend. just comfortable, just warm, just happy. just in love. just alive.

he would be ok.

and as he kissed her once more, this time certain of who he was, where he was, what he was, this time certain he knew he was ok; as he did that, he remembered himself one more time.

my name is marvin mcloughlin. i'm not dead and i'm not going to let myself hurt anymore and anti can suck it if he thinks i'm going to fall to his whims anymore. my name is marvin mcloughlin and i love my family and my friends and myself. my name is marvin mcloughlin and that glitch bitch better hide as well as he can, because a storm is coming and i'm going to be in the eye of it.