#But the whole point is theyre supposed to be saving monsters? Why does this keep happening

[robocops-a-christ-allegory]

I thought the new doom patrol was coming out today but it turns out it came out last week and I MISSED IT but good news PEACEMAKERS BACK FOR ONE PANEL AND ONE PAGE AND ITS JUST BIG ROBOTS HE HAS NOW

HES STILL HERE GUYS THERES STILL A CHANCE HE'LL GET TO DO SOMETHING SOON

[kazistired]

I don’t know how to do the “under the cut” thing so I’m sorry about how long this post is.

Okay guys, here’s my reactions to The School for Good and Evil movie (this was me taking notes as I watched).

THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE

Live reactions:

-KIIIIIIIT

-His guyliner is on point

-KITS MAKEUP IS AMAZING OH MY GOOOOSH

-THEY PULLED A LIV AND MADDIE WOW

-Dang, the CGI is both good and bad, wow

-okay the opening scene? The dialogue is a little cheesy but WHO CARES ITS KIT YOUNG

-first scene over and it’s already very different from the book

-SOPHIA ANNE CARUSO MY QUEEN I LOVE HER

-AGATHA. QUEEN. HECK YEAH

-they changed her mom from a healer to a wannabe witch. Weird

-they gave them more of a backstory together it’s so cute

-THEYRE SO SARCASTIC I LOVE THEM

-oh my gosh they’re so gay in this haha

-the girl playing Agatha looks so familiar

-white men. Scary dude. KEEP AWAY FROM HER YOU DRUNK WHITE ADULT MAN

-HE PULLED A KNIFE ON HER OH MY GOSH

-SOPHIE TO THE RESCUE RAPUNZEL STYLE WITH THE FRYING PAN AAAAAHHHH

-they’re gay your honor

-they’re screwing around with the people’s knowledge of the school. They didn’t know about it until now. That’s weird

-And there’s Sophie being Sophie. Good for you

-the way Sophia plays Sophie gives Lydia Deetz vibes. Maybe it’s cuz she’s the only other character I’ve seen her play, idk

-They’re a lot better friends in the movie than in the book. I think I like it

-they don’t have the whole “shadow kidnapping people every four years and the town knows and tries to stop it” thing

-at least they still have the scary bird

-they don’t set Sophie up as much as a brat before the school so it’s confusing

-the animation for the wolves isn’t very good

-THE FAERIES ARE FREAKY

-the school for evil is full of gender whyyyyyyyyy

-mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. (Red hair lady)

-mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. (Professor Dovey)

-dang lady 360 much?

-Tedros isn’t blonde. It’s a stupid thing to be petty about but okay

-Hort’s voice is very gender

-WHO’S THIS CUPID HARPY DUDE?????

-“CLOSE. DOESN’T. CUT IT. UGH.” Mommy, sorry

-Kit Young materializing in a column of blood? Yeah, okay, why not?

-Hester spits sparks. Dang

-THEY PUT BRUTAL BY OLIVIA RODRIGO IN HERE AAAAHHHHHH

-Gregor is a KING. I love him

-Sophie just straight up kissed a random dude and it was hilarious

-“I thought gnomes were supposed to be short.” “And I thought princesses were supposed to be likable.” HAHAHAHAHAHA

-Agatha and Tedros’s interactions are weird. Not as cagey as in the book.

-the props are painfully obviously props. Specifically the gnome’s staff

-WHY ISNT THE BLUE FOREST BLUE?????? ITS GOT A BLUEISH FOG AND THATS IT. IM LIVID.

-I like the pink little monster flower. It’s adorable. So cute. I love them

-someone get Gregor out of there and give him his grocery store

-SOMEONE. SAVE. GREGOR. PLEASE.

-NOOOOOO GREGOR!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY FRICKING LIGHTNING ZAPPED HIM TO DEATH OH MY GOSH WHY???????? WHY????????????????

-Lesso is BACK. Mommy, sorry, mommy, sorry

-why does Hort look like the front man of an emo band? Love him haha

-“Why don’t you go find someone else to go have mommy issues with” DAAAANG SOPHIE

-Hester is hot. Very. Hot.

-oh yeah, I forgot about the bees

-op the bees formed Kit Young. Kit Young covered in bees.

-Lesso’s got a thing for Rafal (Kit Young’s character). Wow

-okay but why is the scene with Hester putting her demon tattoo back actually heart wrenching?

-Lesso and her freaky love of Rafal. Dang.

-THANK YOU AGATHA FOR POINTING OUT HOW WHAT HAPPENED TO GREGOR IS WRONG

-“they have weapons but we have animals” wow

-CALL THEM OUT AGATHA. GO OFF GIRL

-why are they all so shallow? My gosh, I hate this trope. I’m tired of shallow princesses

-THE WISH FISH TURNED INTO A PERSON OH MY GOSH THAT WAS COOL

-THAT PERSON IS LITERALLY A CHILD OH MY GOSH AND THE CHILD FRICKING DIES IN A CLOUD OF GLITTER WHAT THE HECK

-oh yeah here’s the animal scene where they want Agatha to free them

-GREGOR GOT TURNED INTO A SKELETON BIRD OH MY GOSH

-WAIT TEDROS KILLS HIM IN THE BOOK

-NOOOOOOO TEDROS KILLED HIM I WAS RIGHT

-“Good used to be good and true. Now we are in the age of self-centered perfectionism” ha true

-there’s always a wolf playing the organ I love him

-Sophie is so pretty oh my gosh. She’s gorgeous

-wow, the doom room already? They’re really skipping a lot of stuff. The Tedros and Sophie build up isn’t happening.

-aaaaaaaaaaand there goes her hair

-the fact that Lesso cut it and they don’t have Sophie kill the Beast makes me sad, cuz that’s her tipping point in the book

-Agatha spitting FACTS

-and freaky Rafal in the mirror, lovely

-I love Kit Young so much. His voice? Amazing.

-he’s got his red vampire aesthetic going and it’s hilarious. He literally just needs fangs

-Agatha getting the build up Sophie and Tedros was supposed to get, nice

-did he trip her with his sword? I dunno

-“unlock your finger glow” “master your finger glow” why does the finger glow thing sound so weird

-Hort you masochist

-the key inserting is slightly triggering

-SOPHIE BURSTS IN LOOKING LIKE A HOTTIE WHILE YOU SHOULD SEE ME IN A CROWN BY BILLIE ELISIH PLAYS????????? OH MY GOSH SHE’S SO PRETTY AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

-They’re montaging her bonding with her coven. No development. Just sudden friendship. Even Hester is in on it

-Sophie is hot. So hot. Her dress in the archery scene? Oh my gosh

-This is a two hour movie, I just realized that. I still have an hour left

-Agatha helping Sophie cheat. Good job.

-and now Agatha is getting sad

-Hester…. Hesterrrrrr….. I’m gay

-“you promise” word choice besties

-so…. The trial by tale isn’t a school event in the movie? Really?

-Hort really holds gender in every other shot. Sometimes he’s meh and others I want to look like that

-Bestie don’t announce your location to a dangerous forest at night

-okay from certain angles Sophie with this hair cut looks like Kallmekris (YouTuber)

-FRICKING REAPER SCARECROW THATS TERRIFYING

-HA Tedros got yeeted

-WHAT IN THE FREAKY GHOST STORY WAS THAT CRAWLING PUMPKIN REAPER????? I DID A PROJECT ON A GHOST LIKE THAT IN SOCIOLOGY AND IT MESSED ME UP FOR WEEKS

-reaper go boom

-Sophie is starting to craaaaack

-AND THERE’S KIT IN HIS VAMPIRE COSPLAY AGAIN

-Dovey’s acting needs work

-okay, the Never’s dorm is top notch

-Agatha is bisexual and Sophie is a repressed lesbian. Change my mind

-op, and here comes the nemesis signs

-Kit and his vampire cosplay back at it again

-THATS SO CREEPY

-Lesso is 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻

-see, in the book you don’t know which brother the school master is. Here, good is explicitly stated as the school master and Rafal is causing chaos

-“oh no she’s missing” and no one thought to check the library?

-Sophie’s nooooooooose whyyyyyy

-ooooooo, I like how they made Lesso a reader

-Tedros spitting facts

-“she’s like my sister” NAH YALL ACT TOO GAY TO BE SISTERS SORRY

-Tedros “you’re my true love” after barely interacting. Lovely.

-Sophie had a veil on how ugly is she under there?

-YO WOW SHE LOOKS LIKE MIRACLE MAX

-“quiet Aggie the protagonists are speaking” I’m stealing that, that’s such a good line

-Wow Tedros throwing Agatha under the bus

-see, if you didn’t read the book, the nemesis thing wouldn’t have made sense

-Sophie turned the teachers into wooden dolls, dang

-Agatha literally being the only one in this movie with brain cells

-Never Ball!!!!! I love it!!!!

-Sophie looking like a goblin from Gringotts

-SOPHIE’S HOT AGAIN THANK GOODNESS

-YAS QUEEN MAKE THEM UGLY

-yooooooo Hort is wearing a skirt

-awwww, they’re not ugly, their clothes are just black now

-Hester’s dress is gross

-THEYRE FIGHT SCENE IS LITERALLY A TOXIC BY BRITNEY SPEARS REMIX OH MY GOSH

-HORT IN A SKIRT IS KING LEVEL BEHAVIOR

-I love Hort. He’s my favorite

-Sophie, snap that pen

-YOOOOO THE SCHOOL MASTER WAS ACTUALLY RAFAL

-Vampire cosplay is back at it again

-wow imagine Kit Young watching this back and basically watching him kill himself

-I mean, he’s not wrong. He really did corrupt them.

-Tedros and Agatha had no build up. They had maybe two scenes and that’s it. Ugh. I hate it.

-I didn’t know I’d ever watch Jesper Fahey seduce Lydia Deetz yet here we are

-the CGI for the school’s collapsing kinda sucks not gonna lie

-wow Agatha, that’s cheesy

-what’s with 100s of years old beings wanting to marry Sophia’s character?

-and after an awful stab scene the school’s rebuild lovely

-Sophie being stabbed by the Storian was cheesy as heck

-Rafal called Excalibur an oversized butter knife and honestly good for him

-Sophie is dying so slowly my gosh

-why didn’t Agatha just grab the sword? Why waste Sophie’s fading energy to send it through the air?

-all it took to kill him was one slash? Really?

-Ha, they kissed (yes it was a kiss goodbye cuz Sophie died but whatever)

-ah yes, the magic tears trope

-goooooood morning Sophie

-so…… no teleportation? They don’t get yeeted back to their home town?

-NO WOLF/FAERIE EVER NEVER REVEAL?????? SERIOUSLY????? THAT WAS MY FAVORITE PART OF THE BOOK!!!!!!

-HORT STRAIGHT UP REJECTING BEATRICE YESSSSSSS

-oh okay, they walk through a portal instead

-AGATHA STAYS????? FOR A BOY?????? THAT SHE BARELY KNOWS????? SERIOUSLY???????

-okay nevermind, she goes too

-they use their magic to make birds poop on their bullies. Nice.

-they set it up for a second movie. Good for them.

Okay, so basically they hit enough of their basic plot points to make it through but honestly? Wasn’t the best. The book was waaaaaaaaaaaaaay better.

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

oohohoho you just opened the deepest can of worms on the planet

-mod dave, who wrote a fucking ten mile essay

first off, addressing the second anon, no theyre all humans. h., half humans at least. cause yall know me i fucking love my humanstuck aus off my ASS

(that would be funny as hell though. a troll from space walking into a camp on earth going “I AM THE SON OF ONE OF YOUR EARTH GODS. BITCH” like... holy shit)

so first things first their parents. im gonna lay this out, the beta kids and trolls are all greek (EXCEPT sollux hes roman cause his parent has no greek equivalent), and all the alpha kids and trolls are those gods roman equivalents (,,EXCEPT dirk cause he kinda balances sollux being roman out). i havent figured out how thatd happen like 16+ times yet cause in the percy jackson books theres only ever been one instance of two siblings of the same godly descent being greek and roman respectively in HISTORY so like.. i guess th. i guess thats just not a problem in this au

anyway this gets really long so im gonna talk about the beta kids and trolls cause i havent elaborated on the alphas at all ((peep the tags if you wanna see their parents though))

johns the son of zeus, rose is the daughter of athena, dave is the son of apollo, and jade is the daughter of demeter. they were all raised in their respective states, all had to come to new york for various reasons. jades been there the longest, shes been there 9 years and shes been on a couple quests. her biggest accomplishment so far is how she protected the camp from this big vicious angry hellhound that got past the barrier. naturally the girls fluent in Dog Training, so she steps up and instead of trying to kill this thing, she reaches out and tames it as fast as she can. it ends up actually working, and ever since that day she, her cabin, and the camp have a whole bodyguard sleeping right outside the demeter cabin! hes her steed in battle and hes a Very Good Boy. and his name is becquerel

johns the newest kid at camp, he has no idea who he is or why the fuck his school got attacked or why in the hell those anemoi thuellai were so fixated on him or HOW in the hell he absorbed the lightning one threw at him and ended up fine,,, hes just a big mess right now. a big enough mess that when he got claimed by literally zeus, no one else was around, he shrugged it off as some basic magical happening, and he stayed in the hermes cabin far longer than he should have cause no one! fucking knew he got claimed! by zeus of all people! dumbass. he ends up figuring it out though. like an off-hand mention about how this “weird lightning thing appeared above my head a couple weeks ago, haha weird right?” once he figures it out he realizes “hey i might be able to fly” so he sneaks off into the woods to try it. he succeeds fairly quickly but god almighty everyones face the one day the dude just yote himself off a small cliff without warning,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

dave and rose are really tight, theyve been there roughly the same time length, and since their cabins are across from each other they just bother each other all the time. daves the resident Doctor even though he really doesnt look it cause hes got the apollo powers. apollo is the medicine god. so if you wound your stupid ass in battle daves in the ER room patching you up with his glowy hands. rose on the other hand is a very good strategist. shes one of the only athena kids ever recorded to actually have a power - telekinesis. she has no idea how she developed it, she thinks its from birth, but it freaks her out. shes training it though.

so the beta trolls, are also all human(ish). aradias hades kid. but i pulled a pjo trope on her based on one of my favorite characters (im not saying for spoilers, but if you recognize the situation, You Probably Know Who Its Based Off) and aradia died. her mom, the handmaid, had been pulling some Shady Ass Shit and ended up getting herself killed, but aradia tried saving her and ended up going down with her.

so handmaid gets sentenced to the fields of punishment in the underworld, and aradia gets sentenced to elysium, heroes paradise. shes like “no i want my mom to be okay” so they take that away from aradia and they put them both in the fields of asphodel, the neverending grey space for Not So Good But Not So Bad people. her mom becomes a shade (shadow spirit, no human resemblance), as all people do, but aradia. doesnt? and she gets dunked in the fucking river lethe and if you dont know what that does it erases your memory. so she just. comes out of the river like “hello? wgat tae fukc goin on??” but she still remembers one thing. there was an “a” in her name.

tavros is the son of hermes, hes just kinda taken on the role of backup counselor for when the actual cabin counselor is out. hes in a wheelchair, but he also has prosthetic legs for when he needs to actually stand up and fight. hes really good at it too. also catch him in winged converse cause he Owns Those and Uses Them To His Advantage. hes trying his best to keep focused on the camp, cause aradia was his childhood friend, he misses her a whole lot, she never got to camp in the first place. and to his knowledge, shes still dead.

sollux is a janus kid. thats a problem cause janus is roman, and this is a greek camp. he grew up with dave, he showed up with dave, hes been at camp as long as dave. but hes been unclaimed since he showed up so he thinks hes unwanted by whatever parent he has. he knows hes a demigod, he got through the camp barriers, so what the fuck is wrong with him? he also feels shitty cause hes shit at the greek lessons, he cant read a lick of it which literally every demigod without exception should be able to do, he cant name any gods- well, he can, but.. he gets their names mixed up. why does he keep calling poseidon “neptune”? and he has a much, much different way of natural fighting than other kids. they slice, he jabs. he wasnt taught to jab. 

karkat is an aphrodite kid with vitiligo, and to make matters worse, hes ace and on the aro spectrum. to make matters WORSE, the aphrodite kids are kinda notorious for being really shallow, really materialistic, and really mean. karkats been dubbed the “runt” of the cabin, he gets made fun of for his spots to the point where he uses make up and magic to conceal them. worst of all? hes the kid of the goddess of love, for fucks sake. being reminded that “loveless people shouldnt be able to stay in this cabin, mom must have made a mistake claiming you” is kind of.. a blow to the self esteem. long story short he hates aphrodite for claiming him, and would have rather stayed in the hermes cabin. but he eventually goes on this big quest thats vague as fuck right now but Its The Main Plot, he ends up proving to himself that hes worth something and that his siblings are wrong, and my FAVORITE LINE IN THE WHOLE THING i came up with is HIS when he deals a final blow to some big monster: “REMEMBER MY FACE THE NEXT TIME YOU REINCARNATE. MY NAME IS KARKAT VANTAS, I’M THE SON OF APHRODITE, AND LOOKS CAN KILL.”

nepeta isnt anywhere near developed as others are unfortunately, shes a daughter of ares and shes really really good at hand to hand combat. shes small but she leads groups of people in things ranging from camp volleyball games to actual literal wars. shes a tough little shit

kanaya isnt really developed either, i have yet to figure out most of her powers too actually, shes a daughter of iris, the rainbow goddess though. (blatant reference to both kanayas vampirism and. h. her. sh. es ga. gay) ONE THING SHE CAN DO THOUGH is iris message at will without water or drachmas so really shes just everyones go to cell phone and its fucking hilarious cause people just come into the cabin like “KANAYA I NEED TO TALK TO [X]” and shes like “You Better Fucking Pay Me I Am Not Your Personal Cell Phone”

terezi is the daughter of nemesis and she has this really peculiar power she hasnt really gotten the hang of yet. she has synesthesia, so while she cant see she can smell and taste the colors of her surroundings and its really helpful. sometimes though she gets messages from her mom. they dont even come as dreams half the time, they come as almost a different plane altogether. tez has the power to literally tip the scales, pretty much. and when she gets like that, she can see. shes not on earth though, shit on earth stops when shes like that. shes just kinda In Her Own Head, i guess? and in her head she holds the two scales in her hands. she is the arms of the scale. and depending on which one she lifts up, she can literally alter the fate of the battle or happening thats going on By Herself. once she chooses she just whooshes back to real life though and nothing has changed. the only downside? it takes a LOT of energy and cant be exploited for little things. her one thing on her bucket list is to tap into said powers while getting something from a vending machine so like three things will fall out but it hasnt happened yet and shes upset

vriskas a daughter of tyche, the luck goddess, come the fuck on you knew i was gonna, i havent really elaborated on her either and im upset about that. but hey now you get a break from all those fucking paragraphs

equius is a hephaestus kid, and he kinda stays in the background. hes a range fighter, he spends a lot of time in the forge, and even though its been a project looooong since forgotten, hes been excavating the tunnels under cabin nine for years. by himself. he has no idea where they lead, but dammit hes gonna find out where. he has no idea about a certain bunker in the woods though...

gamzees just there for a fucking laugh tbh hes a son of dionysus and i love that cause hes the god of wine and parties and insanity. usually gamzees just zoning out somewhere hes Not supposed to be, and hes not affected by the maenads FUCKED UP BULLSHIT that goes down the forest sometimes. also hes so fucking scared of tavroses wing shoes he tried them on once while he was high and JESUS CHRIST

eridan is the son of kymopoleia, a SUPER obscure goddess. lets just say dont fuck with eridan cause his mom is the goddess of violent sea storms,

and naturally, feferi is the daughter of poseidon. cause who the FUCK else would she be the daughter of. WHO. NAME ONE GOD

OH AND JUST CAUSE I FORGOT CALLIE AND CALIBORN ARE SATYRS IN THIS AU. CALLIE HAS PAN PIPES. and caliborn still has a gun

[wintercosmicskye]

Uhh, sorry that some of these pictures are so blurry, but I tried drawing my headcannon for Vlinny's timeline... thing

I'm gonna explain each drawing under the read more ^v^'

1.) Discarded Space Dust: of course the first one has to be my more weird headcanon TvT. But anyways: basically what I headcanon is that the divine spirit (vinny's old mii) and Vlinny were once... one? But like, when the world was made, the uhh beings that made it (the programmers I suppose?) Wanted to make one mii that could run the show and have powers and shit? Like, he was supposed to rule after he got the hang of his magic... but, they decided to get rid of half, I guess you could say the dark magic parts, leaving the divine spirit with only the light (I say divine spirit but he's not the divine spirit YET. Right now he's a mii. I just haven't decided what to call him yet... Miitopia era is vine, tomo is vineh(sauce)... should I call the divine spirit "vinny"??).  They tossed the dark magic out into space, discarded. But little did they know, the discarded space dust began to form a human shape and sentience. The dust is confused and doesn't know what he is, but is joyful and curious. His curiosity one day brought him To inspect earth closer, and fell onto it by mistake. The sort of magic of the place gave him a mii form, almost identical to "Vinny", as they were two halves of one whole. (Note: when I say light magic I don't necessarily mean good magic, and likewise that I don't mean evil with dark magic) 

2.) Before he removed his face: this, as I said before, is how I headcannon Vlinny looked before he removed his face: like vinny's old mii but with the hair mirrored. He forgot about being a cosmic entity when he became a mii, but he would frequently find himself looking at the night sky with longing. He had a positive attitude at first, and rather extroverted, wanting to make friends... but.. He seemed to lack the necessary social skills. He was too eager, he didn't understand personal space, he would try inserting himself in a group of people, only for them to be driven away as soon as he did. He made too much eye contact. people avoided him. He didn't understand what he was doing wrong, and no one would tell him. When he one day ran into someone who looked just like him, he thought things were looking up. "He looks just like me! Are we like brothers? Hey, can we be friends?" Unfortunately,they were actually a turn for the worse. "Vinny" immediately hated Vlinny for looking just like him. Because of his magic, he was popular, and unique. He felt that Vlinny could ruin everything. So he decided to ruin everything for Vlinny first. "Why do you look like me?? You shouldn't look like me... you know, there's nothing more boring than something unoriginal. Why can't you get your own face?" Vlinny was distraught by "vinny's" reaction to him, and because of "vinny" people would ignore him even more. And when they didn't ignore him, they would laugh at him. Vlinny couldn't understand. He was sad. He was jealous. He decided that his own face was to blame, and so he removed it, and then...

3.) True Form/Dark Curse: he becomes the dark curse! He starts out more humanoid, but as he possessed more people his form degrades to the "poop emoji" shape (but after regaining a human form, his true form reverts to the more humanoid one). He feels nothing but the hate and jealousy he had. Possessing people and trying to make "vinny's" life a living Hell for what he did, he practically caused the apocalypse of what they considered a "utopia" (which I decided is called Lumos, like the new one Vlinny made in miitopia that the strong monsters are in). He was finally stopped for the time being when "Vinny" and some others managed to trap him in a stone necklace carved to look like an eye. "Vinny", as his own sort of punishment, agreed to be put in a jeweled necklace of a closed eye, so that if the dark curse returns he could guide his descendents. However, rather than being passed down his family line like he was supposed to someone else took him and he was passed down their family instead. The dark curse in his necklace was also placed in a locked chest, then shoved deep down in an icy mine. Then several generations later, he gets Mike Love (or Bill Trinen???) To go down into the mine and open the chest, he possessed him, and then Miitopia plot.

4.) Reborn: the dark curse is given a second chance at life when Miitopia's hero and savior Vine gives him a new face. He is Vlinny again, but there's something wrong with his mouth... the Great Sage, Jesus, takes Vlinny with him to atone for what he did. Vlinny feels guilty about what he did, but the feeling of jealousy and hate still lingered at the back of his mind. He wants to be good, but is a little confused as to how. Even with Jesus and the others trying to help. Nonetheless, he really does try to atone for what he did. He also must try to get a hold on his powers, as he has trouble controlling them in his new form. However, just as things seemed like they were going well...

5.) Frozen: the monsters are still around even after saving the dark curse, and it causes a lot of problems. People immediately blame Vlinny for the monsters continued presence. One thing after another, and things escalate ending with Vlinny being pushed off a cliff into the water below. His fear triggers his ice powers, and he accidentally completely freezes himself at the bottom of the ocean. Upon this happening, the monsters disappear, and his skyscraper falls from the sky. He hadn't even known his very presence was keeping the monsters in existence. Several generations pass, and people had abandoned the land of Miitopia as water levels rise and the great land is reduced to a small island.

6.) Test Tube: a team of Jahn scientists are the given the task to replicate the leader of a small island with the intention of the clone take his place. They presume that the task will be easy to complete, but find themselves proven wrong as they have difficulty creating a human clone.Yhey began to panic because if they cant complete their task their superiors will dispose of them. When visiting the island to gather more dna samples, one jahn decides to look for specimens in the ocean and discovers... a man that looks eerily similar the person they are trying to replicate frozen in ice! He takes a chance that even his team questions, and brings the frozen man back to the jahn planet, where they thaw him and place him in a test tube so they can revive him (though he somehow still had a beating heart after being frozen for who knows how long). After stabilizing him, they decide to use a serum to give him amnesia, because they dont want his past life interfering with their new plan for him. After hes out of the test tube, the jahns need to reraise him. They try to teach him how to be Vinehsauce (Vlinny develops some jealousy towards Vinehsauce).Vlinny does not like it on the Jahn planet, disliking their excessive order and no fun. Vlinny has difficulty understanding his own emotions, as most around seem to have none whatsoever. Hes also taught combat by a red army jahn (future fake captian jahn) who decides to use vlinny as a weapon for his own plan, and decides to “befriend” Vlinny. Lumberjahn makes the suit Vlinny wears when he first comes to Vineland, which is like a freezer he could wear (and also arm canon). Hes sent to Vineland ahead of the jahns on a ship made just for him, the “Ice Fractal”.

7.) Tomodachi Life: we know what happened here, but I’ll use this spot for headcanons! My interpretation of Vlinny is chaotic neutral, sometimes tipping more towards the good side and evil side. hes abit morally confused, cuz the jahns had no morals at all. He works with the jahns when they come, helping with their quest for chicken cutlets, though the captain is annoyed that Vlinny had not successfully replaced Vinehsauce, but gives him other tasks. Vlinny becomes more involved when the fake captian overthrows the real captian. Vlinny starts to want out when he realized that the fake captain had lied about them being equals and also sees the damage theyre causing, but the fake captain threatens to hurt Dheerse (oh no), a girl on the island that Vlinny had befriended and started to crush on (awww), forcing Vlinny to continue. During the Jahnpocalyse, Vlinny officially turns on the jahns, breaking the fake captians visor and saves Dheerse, who the fake captain was about to force Vlinny to shoot. The real captain gains back control, and decides its time to abandon the mission. they try to take fake captian into custody, but he escapes in pod and is now who-knows-where. Vlinny almost dies at one point after falling out of the jahn ship. his armor is broken and only the the arm with the arm canon was still functional. he stays on the island with lumberjahn, and wants to make things up to Dheerse. Things really start to look up for him, but then the erasings happen. hes one of the only people who remember, her existence being erased from people’s memories. Vlinny, desperately asking everyone where she went, is seen as having gone crazy. additional notes: the parka he wears actually keeps him cool. this is because he has a cold body temperature, and the parka helps hold in his coldness, like how it would hold in another person’s heat. he used to have red blood, but it was replaced with blue blood when the jahns revived him. the blood comes out as a mist if he gets cut in hotter weather. tears freeze on his face when he cries. even though the jahns got rid of his memory, his past still effects him subconsciencly. he wants to befriend people but its harder when hes stuck in his ice room most of the time. he loves being center stage, but is self conscience about his perma smile v-mouth. he likes to play violin, and tries to write his own songs, but rarely shares them. so far only dheerse has heard some of his music in the form of love songs. some of his music is a little on the edgy side.

8.) how vlinny is in Feathers of Frost, my fanfic, minus the fact that he doesnt have the halo and scythe... yet.

thankyou for reading through all this if you did!! sorry if my headcanons are a little weird heh...

[tumblunni]

hey uhhh YKNO WHATS GOOD brainstorming potential headcanons for a character you know NOTHING ABOUT

i guess its less headcanons and more like.. wishes? hopes? what i think would be cool to do with this dude and like ALL I KNOW is that he is a cool dude and apparantly he doesnt have a backstory or sympatheticness SO consider what if he did and maybe thatd be cooler. like dude he owns THE SINGLE BEST BOSS BATTLE THEME IN ALL VIDEOGAMES EVER and that is ALL I KNOW ABOUT HIM and i just want him to deserve it, yo. also if he turned good i could be his friend and some of the badassness would rub off on me

ANYWAY

COOL SQUID PRESIDENT

i would vote for this man as squesident

seriously the design is SO GOOD!!! how did they manage to get such a cool colourscheme out of his entire Thing being that he has no colours?? like damn i like white being used as an evil colour for once, thanks. it symbolizing emptyness and emotionlessness is like BIG YES and i really hope thats what they were going for cos apparantly the wiki says that all the yokai who join his “we should never be friends with humans” gang turn colourless to match? but like the dude himself is less plain white and more very light shades of blue, grey and gold. MAYBE REFLECTS THAT HE IS A MANIPULATIVE DOUCHE WHO MAYBE DOESNT REALLY CARE ABOUT YOKAI AND JUST WANTS TO RULE THE WORLD PERHAPS dammit why does everything about him scream “great 100% evil guy who is very scary” when man I WANT TO LIKE HIM, DAMMIT!!

ALSO SERIOUSLY the visual effect of the wild spirally red yellow eyes against an otherwise “peaceful” colour whose entire point as an evil is “peaceful” taken to a bad extreme. it REALLY immediately sells that “tries to pretend to be calm, collected and fancy but is actually an angry mofo at heart” vibe i got from his theme song??? I REALLY HOPE THATS ACTUALLY HOW THIS COOL BOSS BATTLE GOES DOWN cos man the best villains are smug asshles who Always Win and then when you FINALLY win you get that much of a better ending!!! but AGH another part of me is like “i hope im wrong because he looks like a Cool Dad and i want him to be good”. Maybe his true design concept was to betray me personality with using all his cool dad power for evil...?

ALSO im not gonna spoil you guys on it cos it is JUST AS AMAZING AS HIS SONG but i was toooootally right that he has some sort of super intimidating second form and its got THE COOLEST DESIGN EVER HOLY SHIT! and also apprantly there’s a recoloured bonus boss called Minister Squisker who’s like a colour swap in a really creative way?? it swaps him being all “blank” themed with scary bright eyes and instead his entire body is a wild ye olde mythological illustration style paint job in every colour ever. okay COOL HEADCANON NUMBER ONE thats actually the regular colour of the species and mckraken is the white sheep of the family lol

also UHHH i dunno it seems kinda weird to me that theyd have this dude running a goddamn political party about humans being bad yet he doesnt seem to have any motivation whatsoever for it? unless it really is just supposed to be ‘he only pretends he wants to protect yokai from humans so he can manipulate and rule the yokai’. but like HYPOTHETICALLY in some universe where he actually lives up to his Grumpy Dad Who Has A Hidden Soft Spot potential, maybe he has an understandable backstory that raises legitimate concerns about how humans are destroying the natural and mythological and forgetting their roots, or other reasonable reasons why yokai could think humans are dangerous and all. i mean we ARE dangerous, we’re just a wide group of people that contain evil bastards and also good people, yknow. And thatd resonate well as a plot probably, cos well the whole point of the series is “in real life ur scared of yokai but theyre actually all goofy pranksters who will be your best friend forever”. Both sides being afraid of each other could lead to some good plotness! and it could be really effective and sad if after hours of joyous childhood wonder the protagonist bumps into the first yokai they couldnt befriend. the first one thats scared of them. the first member of this weird colourless political party who accuses them of committing crimes against yokaikind, of obviously only enslaving these yokai friends cos you have an ulterior motive, just like all humans! it could be effective if its something that shakes up the whole way you saw the world and establishes that hey its not all fun and happiness, and there’s some people you are powerless to convince. maybe even some people you are powerless to save...?

ANYWAY possible idea for ‘what if the dude originally had a sympathetic motive but it got twisted over time and now he’s just a fuck BUT maybe he could still be redeeminated someday ok thanks” What if he’s the spirit of.. like.. ocean pollution? Like there’s some yokai who are ghosts of a mortal person but theres some that are just nature spirits or personifications of concepts. What if he’s the personification of the dying screams of all the wildlife killed in a particular tragic oil spill? hence squid = thematic, and blank white colourscheme = even more thematic reflecting the stain the oil would leave on a pristine ocean and also the blank emotionlessness he was left as after witnessing that tragedy. Cos like his entire Purpose would have been born out of avenging anger but i mean he was just a kid, the only one left alive on a ruined beach and seeing just how powerful humans were and how pointless it would be to try and fight them with his weak power. like he was born to avenge all these souls and he just keeps failing!! his entire reason to live and he’s just too small!! so he ends up becoming bitter and cynical and learning how to use his silver tongue to manipulate others into becoming his weapons, and he vows that someday he’s gonna come back when he has the power he needs to complete his mission. and he’s just forever had this anger seething inside that he’s been unable to get any catharsis from, so when his cold and collected persona cracks he’s really damn scary with all these years of a man who’s grown old fearing he’ll never be able to avenge his ocean friends and just AAAAAA! itd be really good cos itd be a way he could still be intimidating and high stakes as a boss fight but also sympathetic!! also it could make sense why he’d only be redeemable after defeating him? like this entire time he’s been hidden behind a million layers of politics and minions and stuff and its very easy for him to not see the reality of the fact that he’s terrorizing human children just like how humans scarred him as a child. so like his whole big second form transformation super anger mode time would be sort of a last ditch attempt to deny what he already knows, the doubts that have been eating away at his soul now he’s getting close to the end of his life goal. but also like.. he doesnt even know who he IS, under the lies! its been his entire purpose for existing. like he probably uhh.. didnt have much plans after his victory. he probably wouldnt have much will to live left. so yeah you basically beat up this guy’s emotional walls and make him face the face of the people he’s been hurting, when he’s been trying to avoid it for so long. and he gets to see how much all the other yokai genuinely trust you and how much youre personally sacrificing to protect them so maybe you really arent just lying about being a good person...

oh also i was thinking about the inherant hypocrisy present in the fact that this guy is a big spoopy REALLY WELL DESIGNED squid monster that spends all his time in a depowered humansona instead, despite his whole Thing being hating humans. and, yknow, ‘i’ll solve this using a carbon copy of human politics instead of any more traditionally magical way of fighting the humans’. Yeah. So THEORY of SADNESS maybe he like never actually met any other yokai for a long time? I dont think it really makes sense that he’d be hypocritical because he secretly likes humans or something, that wouldnt jive with this backstory idea. So im thinking another explanation could be that he genunely doesnt know much about yokai culture? Like cos of his backstory he just poofed into existance on this destroyed beach in the human world and spent the first few centuries of his life completely alone except for the terrifying monsters that haunted every second of his life, and the knowledge that it was his purpose to defeat them but he didnt know how. And he was a nature spirit of the sea but his sea was empty of everything except death, so he couldnt even hug a cute fish sidekick or something- OH GOD WHAT IF HE DID HAVE A CUTE FISH SIDEKICK AND IT DIED COS OF HUMANS!!! very tiny sad squid monster child holding a dead pet, oh god why did my heart did this to meeee!! so yeah he didnt even know he was a yokai or wtf yokai are, he didnt know anywhere outside the tiny rock pool he would hide in on this barren beach. And then someday he gets found by an older yokai and adopted and like he feels like he owes them so much cos they gave him a reason to live, and a connection to the nature that he was supposed to protect, and.. well.. any companionship at all ever. So thats how his directionless “humans are bad” turned into “yokai are good and i need to protect them from humans like i failed to protect the beach” which turned into “i need to get more power to do this” which turned into manipulating other yokai and seeing them as nothing more than tools to take down the humans, his revenge consuming him until he barely remembered the reasons he originally wanted to do it...

and blablabla thats where we bring in the recolour bonus boss also, and say thats the nice grandpa figure who adopted him when he was all lost and trapped in the human world. and cos he was sorta adopted into nobility thats why he’s so over the top with his pompousness, its like a hint of IM LOVV MY GRANDEPA shining through his grumpface. ALSO maybe a sad situation where the gramps saw his kid growing up into this scary extremist and he tried to reason with him that humans dont need to be destroyed and that led to them fighting and him getting sealed off in recolour bonus boss land. and mckraken sees it as the biggest betrayal of his life and it totally threw him off the slippery slope to feel like the one man he trusted the most was a traitor to yokai all along. but even at his most evil he couldnt bear to actually kill his beloved gramps so he just imprisoned him and tries to stop thinking about it but like THE CONSTANT SPECTRE OF THE GUILT HANGS OVER YOUR HEAD THAT YOU DID YOU GRAMPS WRONGGGG So yehmaybe protag could find the gramps guy and hear about the sad backstory via him and then defeat mckraken and make him realise he was wrong and he apologises to his gramps and atones and all the humans and yokai are friends again and BUNNI CRIES FOREVER the end

cos seriously man this guy’s design is too good to be wasted on a hateable!! srsly he’s like that archetypical goofy big beard chubby pirate dude BUT INTIMIDATING AND BADASS AND COOL FASHION AND DAVY JONES SQUID BEARD SQUEARD I LOVE HIM he is too round to be 100% evil

*slams fists on the table* IF YOU DONT LIVE UP TO MY EXPECTATIONS I AM GONNA CRY

aaa i need to stop just sitting here theorizing about this game and actually friggin play it lolllll

[grigio-bone]

personal lupat thoughts

under the cut

i think that one of the reasons that people are getting frustrated with it isnt necessarily that the story is bad, its that the setup and outcomes of the show have this kind of... slight disconnect? or rather, not a disconnect- its as if the show itself can’t figure out if its going to be lighthearted or serious til the end, when its too late to give a satisfying conclusion either way.

its absolutely fine if lupat is a show with light plot. shows like that have been some of my favorites. but i feel as if frustration is inevitable and understandable when the show keeps hinting that things are happening and either never follows up or follows up far too late to allow for a nuanced exploration. for example, noel not being human was hinted at as early as ep 28, when tsukasa wonders why noel wouldn’t use the vs vehicle that he he made himself, and seemed intent on making the other rangers use it. but by the time the big reveal rolls around, who remembers this? mysteries are fine, but if theyre dragged out for so long that viewers have started to forget there was a mystery in the first place that... kinda makes me sad. if lupats going to be a show with a light plot!!! thats perfectly fine, just make sure to resolve the plot points at the core of your story and stop teasing things that wont get resolved for like more than a dozen episodes?

on that note, theres also this... hm. the worldbuilding in lupat is incredibly weak. theres very little sense that this is an actual world that has people living in it and ive got a zillion questions about everything. why is france hq in france?? what about the lupin collection black market trade that canonically exists? whats public opinion like on literally every aspect of the conflict thats happening? actually i could seriously go on for like hours about this so ill cut it short: basically, i think  that the fact that there are hardly any reoccurring or tertiary cast members and the fact that hilltop + jim carter + kogure are vastly underutilized puts all of the focus on the rangers themselves, which is nice but also leaves them stranded in a world not quite real

one last thing. i think that lupat tends to take the cheap way out of things. not in terms of effects or whatever, just that it seems intent on distracting viewers from the fact that it didn’t offer us a solidly emotional conclusion to some arcs? ok this is gonna be controversial so im going to add another disclaimer here that i did think that it was cool that the lupins loved ones became thieves in turn to rescue them, etc, it was a really sweet reunion, they look fantastic in those outfits, i did cry a little bit. however. lets take the finale piece by piece

1) patoranger side. their big speech in the final episode was about how they had to protect the world from a bloodthirsty monster like dogranio, because he made people suffer (people that the patos had failed to protect). ultimately, at the end keiichiro is offered a choice: he can kill dogranio at the cost of knowing that he would be killing 3 people that he knows and loves. we dont get to see what happened to dogranio right away, but the show lets us think for like 5 min that keiichiro too the shot. which... why? almost everything we’ve seen of keiichiro up to this point indicates that he would never do something like that, and if he would consider putting anyone in danger in order to do better, then tsukasa will punch him because that means hes seriously lost sight of things. its not as if hes been struggling more with the notion that he might not be able to save everyone as the series goes on- which isnt a downside at all, lupats characters are its strongest point and keiichiros solid lawful goodness is a core part of his character- but ultimately, we’re left at a point where there is no way that keiichiro would shoot dogranio and kill the lupins. there was never a chance. and with this being the case, the patos last big hurrah is ultimately a failure: they cant get the lupins out, but they also cant get rid of the threat of dogranio for good.

2) lets talk about the loved ones becoming thieves. honestly. i loved it. but its not as strong a reunion as it could have been. the problem with the lupins loved ones becoming thieves is that it raises like a hundred questions in the last 10 min of a show, and we don’t have a good understanding of what the loved ones are like as people without the lens of the lupins’ perspectives to look through. and again, all the meaty episodes with reminiscences about the loved ones were in the first half of the series? i dont feel that the lupin magnum ep bc that vibes more like a i am the shadow the true self type deal, but it does show that the lupins are bringing their loved ones back for at least partially selfish reasons: its not about what they would have thought about it, its about what the lupins want. but with this in mind... we don’t know enough about the loved ones to know many of the nuances of what theyre like, either as people or as thieves? were they worried? angry? would they blame the patos for failing to rescue the thieves? (also theres this whole thing about how if theyre acting as phantom thieves then the gspo should know about them but theres no time to get into that, i suppose) im not saying it was bad! outfits were super cute and kairi and his bros reunion was super touching but im sitting here in complete conviction that their appearance as thieves ultimately raises more questions than it does answers, and this close to the ending (like 10 min!!!!!), hinders a satisfying conclusion

(TBC LATER)

[dewprisms]

kh3 spoilers idk tumblr keeps not saving them and idk what i was doing last :/ but this will be the last one unless there’s DLC or something

this terranort scene....everyone sure is taking their time to attack him

kairi where is your keyblade seriously??? maybe you should have it out???? why are they making her a fucking damsel in distress again

so Donald and Lea get hurt because Kairi’s too dumb to not have her keyblade out with monsters around what the FUCK was the point of her training if they’re making her NOT DO A DAMN THING EXCEPT BE A D-I-D

god is THIS why I saw posts about people being upset over kairi’s treatment? Because they don’t even have to do ANYTHING? or is it about to be worse?

....and Aqua just....doesn’t even try, she just drops her blade and lets go

this entire scene is suppose to be sad but I’m just getting pissed off at how FUCKING STUPID they all are

“where am i” looks like heaven, ur dead kid

chirithyyyyyyy

....Chirithy def has Kairi’s? voice, def the voice of another character but higher pitched

oh shit Sora’s ACTUALLY dead

is....that xion?

Namine!

...is this Chirithy....Ven’s Chirithy?

Lea never did change into his new clothes

THEYRE HOLDING HANDS

oh, NOW I actually unlocked KG as an actual world

what....did time rewind? it’s the same scene...

LW!!!! Terra’s back!!

WHAT?! EPHEMER?!

oh my god, THIS is where all the KHUX names come in? We help Sora fight the Darkness Tornado

aww, I didn’t see my name :( that didn’t seem like 300 tho

oh, so it IS KH1 Riku

there he is, my love!!! aand he’s gone

oh no, Mickey’s starting to lose hope

oh dang, Mickey knows Time magic? not Stop, but Time

YEN SID!!!!!! HE ACTUALLY DID SOMETHING

man this is why he’s the most powerful magician in the series

oh shit there are 2 girls.....is it really xion?

mannnn Xehanort’s voice is sooooo bad and the accent just gets worse and worse like the dude isn’t even trying to hide it

where’s Terra? He’s not back yet

oh Luxord’s not dead

oh god, I have to fight ALL FOUR of them with Mickey

nvm, just me vs 3

nvm that was easy, just ignore larx and marly

oh, Luxord’s helping....and he dies again

where’s mar and larx tho. i didn’t kill them

oh, larx only helped to stay with marluxia....cause of their past in khux...

marly lost his memory too?

now i gotta kill my bf again....

yup, he never got one....xehanort lied to him....

they’re so mean to him :((((((((((( I mean he deserved it yeah but

nOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE KILLED HIMSELF WHYYYY

im legit upset

oh no, it is repliku, not past riku....

the real repliku....is giving ups his chance of life for namine......

wow......kairi got hit twice and fucking passed out....she’s worse than donald.....she didnt do any damage and got knocked out way too fast...

xion :(

also-ran??? wtf is that

ROXAS!!!

SSIC trio is back!

fuckING KAIRI GOT KIDNAPPED   A G A I N  ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

who the FUCK is “her” they keep talking about

so Saix was more bitter over over not just him but this mysterious girl they were searching for

nooooooo he died in Lea’s arms (also? apologize to Xion for how you treated her you fuck)

...so Xion’s hair is brown now....?

SSIC TRIO HUG!!!!!

Also....why was Xion with them in the first place??? They NEVER said why

naturally, aqua vs terranort and ven vs van

JHBSJKKSD I killed Terranort and ALL he said was “ow??” like he hit his arm on a door

I don’t think they understand that Vanitas didn’t have a choice, he “chose” darkness because he IS darkness, that’s literally what he is, he never had a choice to be what he wanted, he can’t be with light because Ventus is his light

jfc Terranort shook them around so much they passed out

Holy shit IS THE THEORY TRUE??? The guardian is Terra’s Heartless!!!

so Guardian = Heart, Terranort = Body, LW = Soul, dude was literally split into the 3 states

WAYFINDER HUGS!!!!

fucking....they took Kairi to force them to fight the last fights....instead of LITERALLY ANYONE ELSE!!!! if Kairi is so fucking weak as they’re writing her to be, it would’ve been more beneficial to kidnap one of the stronger people (like Mickey!!) instead but no they gotta kidnap the girly girl who’s been a DID in every. single. main. game. so far. :))))))))

lmao killed YMX with the Magic Carasoule

ngl I was kinda expecting YMX to betray himself...

Xehanort just sit here and watches these little cut scenes after every individual defeat....

......oh....ansem sod was gonna betray them....but gave up hope he could change anything....

aww Mickey used Curaga on us right before he knew he was gonna get taken again also I forgot to equip Curaga for myself oops I still have Cura on my slots, why does it not automatically equip them now....nobody wants to ever use the weaker versions, lower magic cost or not

what, Xemnas actually regrets being bad to the org? why, it makes no sense from how he was written before

WHAT HE KILLED KAIRI

“Why her?!” because she’s a fucking girl in this franchise

im so goddamn pissed off, no WONDER everyone is so mad about the ending

....Xehanort’s VA is......so bad............he has no damn emotion..............like, people talk about Aqua and Terra’s VA”s being emotionless? Nah, this dude really sucks

so Riku and Mickey got Stop’d but Donald and Goofy didn’t (or Sora of course

oooooo Ven and Roxas noticed each other....that’s gonna be a convo.....

“Kairi will be alright.” Yeah after everything’s done and over with to keep her out of the action

............so he gets taken out because he’s too distracted to see the 11 people aiming for him? are you fucking kidding me

so Xehanort...is a portal...to Cable Town??

mannn so the guys in those gucci outfits aren’t even the new org, they’re all just old man xehanort himself

wait wait no, they have all the weapons of the org? so are they them or does he just have all their powers??? nvm they’re all him

god even his power-up scream was underwhelming........

yup, a goat, the sin of Lust iirc

.....that fight...was extremely underwhelming....is that it?

“there is one sky, one destiny” dude that’s kairi’s line fuck off

EVEN DON AND GOOF ARE GETTING HITS IN like damn man

he just. straight up took the light from Sora and forced him into Anti-Form? ok

well, at least he actually sounds like he’s dying in pain

ERAQUS! at least he has his voice, that’s def mark hamil still

“that doesn’t mean that i can’t be there for you” you’re the one that fucking killed him you lying motherfucker

...so eraqus apologized to aqua and ven, but not to terra who he also attacked? ok

and so the boyfriends ascend to the afterlife together

where the FUCK is Kairi

so

so the game

fucking ends

with Kairi fucking dead

THATS THE FUCKING SEQUEL HOOK?!

this whole ending is suppose to be sweet with all the reunions but I’m just royally pissed off

oh, it is Ven’s Chirithy....but he didn’t have his memory come back...

oh! Lea’s new outf- XION GETS ONE TOO AAAAAAAAAA AND ISA!!!!!!!!!!!

Namine!!

they just. found Kairi offscreen.........................................................................

whelp, SoKari def canon SoRiKai is way better tho, as is somewhat RepliNami and Terrqua and MarLarx

wait.....what happened to Sora? Is Kairi actually not back then??

omg, Drake Bell was young Eraqus??? what, it said the Foretellers in the credits....when was that?? I don’t recall ever seeing them.....

............what happened to the card Luxord gave Sora that he said could help turn the tide of the battle? It never came up as far as I can tell..

...uh.....did they forget that Frozen takes place in the summer.....why is the area still covered in snow? it stopped once Elsa controlled her powers.....

yup, there’s Luxu(?) and the KHUX hook, though I don’t see Ava among them

OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

XIGBAR IS LUXU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’LL SEE HIM IN MORE GAMES AAAAAAAAAAAAAA THE THEORY WAS- wrong, cause everyone was saying he’s the Master of Masters

oh, I completely forgot about Maleficent and Pete lmao

oh, so Sora really was gone- oh what the fuck are they in the real world now????? no, what the fuck, the FF knockoff in Toy Box was real?? or is it a DLC hook?

[agentdammers]

Grand Torchwood Rewatch 1x12 & 13

IF YOU FALL I WILL CATCH U I’LL BE WAITING........ T I M E A F T E R T I M E

One season down...... It’s a Finale Double Whammy, just as it aired back in 2007! Crumbs of Jack Lore drop into our laps, some absolute plot bullshit takes place, an old man is there!!! fuck it let’s get this over with

content warn: pisstaking, fun having, oh! plot bullshit!, i absolutely lose my fucking mind, Owen Harper!!! I Won’t Hesitate Bitch

1x12 “captain jack harkness”

- a thought before we dive in, but man owen gets A LOT of story stuff over the course of the 2 seasons he’s in right??? like more story stuff than ianto and tosh combined. interesting

- AH FUCK!!! A VOTE SAXON POSTER. REMEMBER WHEN?

- so..... here’s a thing. “Ohhh people have heard music from a derelict building! better send torchwood in!” how... does that come about? Could it be squatters or something??? fuck it, let’s send in a Secret Government Agency! they’ll sort it out. i mean we don’t know what they do exactly but i imagine at least one of them is a ghostbuster or something lmao, whatever

- OH NO THIS CREEPY OLD BITCH!!! i forgot how scary he looked!! god, this dude must be a million, or a vampire, or likely both

- tosh’s eyes get SO BIG WHEN THAT GUY ASKS HER TO DANCE I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! she’s the best one!!!!!!

- wish i could wipe this episode entirely from my memory because that fucking reveal when the Real jack harkness introduces himself? F    U    C   K

- speaking of tosh, finding it extremely unconvincing that she, a tech nerd, would go out with a laptop with an almost completely flat battery... like, c’mon. she would be prepared

- Gwen cooper, a fully adult woman: haha me and my friends;;;; came here 4 a dare;;; cos its spooky lol....

- the camera on this show has me fucking SCREEEAMING “He wears a cravat.” THERE’S A DRAMATIC SLOW MOTION ZOOM IN ON THIS GUYS FUCKING CRAVAT AND THEN ON IANTO’S FACE LOOKING AT IT AND ITS ALL IN FUCKING EARNEST LET ME DIE!!!!!!!!!

- the dance they’re at is called “KISS THE BOYS GOODBYE DANCE”, which is what my finishing move would be called if i was a character in a fighting game

- ianto and owen slapfighting over their shit girlfriend experiences fucking owns genuinely lmao

- tosh pops the top off a tin and then cuts her hand open on the obviously blunt fucking lid?????? jesus christ

- “I’m tired of living in awe of the rift!!!” .....................first i’ve heard of it. I love that owen is talking as though the rift has been a major fucking factor throughout the entire series up until this point, rather than a thing that’s just been vaguely fucking referenced as the reason why a bunch of weird shit just seems to happen in cardiff. no, im not standing for this. You can’t pull out the rift at the eleventh hour and then talk about it as though it’s a Hugely Important plot device when the biggest role it’s had over the stretch of the entire 11 Whole Ass episodes prefacing this was to allow the plane to come through in “out of time”. y’all have barely mentioned the rift this entire time and now you want to act like its the hellmouth??? eat my ass!!!!!!

- and continuing on that note: apparently they’ve had a machine that can manipulate the rift in the hub......... the entire goddamn time. but no one thought to MENTION it i guess!!!!!!!! pfft, why would THAT be important??? right???? right?????

this plot bullshit almost makes me feel bad for how harsh i was about “cyberwoman” but, i will admit.... despite this Absolute Fucking Nonsense, i do find the jack and tosh storyline in this episode really fun and interesting. its just unfortunate that all the stuff arrrrround that is some kind of fic scrawled in the back of a kid’s math book.

- also the size of owen’s fucking NADS in this episode!!!!!!!! “Don’t compare yourself to me.” SAYS MAN CRYING OVER THE GIRL HE KNEW FOR ONE (1!) (SINGULAR) WEEK!!!! as opposed to ianto’s longterm girlfriend being turned into a monster and eventually murdered by his own team!!!! Like, i understand that’s owen’s problem actually goes beyond that, and its not so much about diane herself but about the fact that he let himself feel close to someone again after his fiancee died but for us, The Audience, watching this as it airs... we haven’t unlocked owen’s tragic backstory yet. and without knowing all that it just makes owen look really bad and like a huge fucking tool lmfao.

- NEVERMIND THE END IS GAY AND SAD AND Y’KNOW!!!!!! i am a man of simple pleasures, at heart, and so... i’ll let it slide. jack meeting his namesake knowing that he’s going to die and them having a moment is more of the kind of emotional content we would get in episodes of doctor who, and its Just Right

- in honesty, theres a bunch of stuff about this ep that i DO like. that tosh gets a prominant role for a change, while gwen gets to do fuck all. the whole Real Jack story. owen gets shot and pops a tit out at the end. its just unfortunate thats its all wrapped up in this rift thing thats been wheeled out last minute for a Big Season Finale with no real foreshadowing or build up to it at all lmao. but, moving on...............................................................................................

1x13 “end of days”

- RHYS BUNS DETECTED, A SOUND WAY TO KICK OFF ANY EPISODE

- lovely reading voice ianto’s got..... i also like owen acting up to make sure we know that they remember him being shot in the shoulder last episode lol.

- “owen, if you open the rift you’ll break it” (owen opens the rift anyway) “owen, you opening the rift broke it” (owen GASPS IN DISMAY, ME??? REALLY?) yes bitch open your ears

- “So are we going to sit around crying into our lattes or are we gonna do something about it?” OWEN..... IS THIS. SUPPOSED TO SOUND BADASS I.... GENUINELY CANT TELL? IT SOUNDS BAD, OWEN

- jack was so likeable last ep now he’s a DICK. gwen calls him out on how he talked to owen and he’s really fucking catty at HER for no reason at all????

- i haaaaaaaaate this scene in the hospital where a Mystery Illness has all the fucking symptoms of the bubonic plague but apparently every doctor in the entire hospital never did high school level history and are all incapable of recognising it. if fucking *i* know what symptoms of the bubonic plague are im sure they didn’t need Absolute Brain Genius Owen Harper who is seemingly the only person with any sense in cardiff to come in and diagnose it. i also hate how owen just like casually mentions to the doctor yep, this is caused by people falling through time dude yknow!!! like they do!! expect more of this to keep happening probably idk!!

- “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU OPENED THE RIFT WITH THIS MACHINE WE HAVE THAT’S FOR UHHHHHHHH UHHHHHHH OPENING THE RIFT *big fuck off galaxy brain*” thats basically this episode.

- i love that owen has followed jack all this time but NOW in a crisis is the time to actually lose it and start questioning his authority bc they dont Actually know who jack is like???? you’ve been fine not knowing this entire time before??? thats not to say that jack isn’t an entire dumbass himself. he expects them all to follow him blindly and its so creepy. he’s like a cult leader, and as they all have Torchwood Stockholm Syndrome that ive mentioned in previous episode run downs they’ve all just gone along with it.

- owen having a little cry on the way out is such a Good scene bc he puts on such a brave and defiant front tho 💕💖💘💕

- i dont know why the really quick flashback to diane flying off in the plane made me lose my fucking mind, its just like “LMAO IN CASE U FORGOT: SHE WAS THE PLANE LADY. I KNOW SHE WAS ONLY IN FOR LIKE TWO MINUTES, BUT DONT WORRY ABOUT IT.”

- gwen for fucks sake!!!!!!!! not again!!!!! after all the cryptic shit and lies she’s told rhys up until this point, she now knocks him out and locks him in a cell and STILL offers no explanation. this poor fucking dude!!!!!!!!! and it’s about to get even worse for him...

- the way gwen screams “RHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEUUUUUUUURRRRRSSSSS”

- YES EVERYONE REBEL AGAINST JACK!!!!!!! FUCK THIS DUDE!!!! you’re doing what a creepy old dude who is Absolutely Definitely evil wants, but still

- why does gwen start doing shit on the computer when toshiko, the computer expert, is standing right there, like.............

- JACK TRYING TO SMACKTALK TO ENTIRE GANG LIKE HIS OWN CLOSET ISN’T CHOCKFUL OF FUCKING SKELETONS

- i forget, does anyone know jack’s immortal apart from gwen? or was it just the shock of owen actually Shooting Their Boss? the only onscreen death i can recall of his after suzie shot him was in “cyberwoman”

- god, minutes ago they were all like FUCK JACK!!!! JACK DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO SAVE US AFTER ALL!!! and now theyre all crawling back asking jack to save them all from cgi pig Ganon and its just..... a lot to happen, over the space of about half an hour.

- the ending is so anticlimatic and also why does sucking all the Yummy Life Energy out of jack make abaddon die?????????? Though in its defence... after like 3 bowls of cereal, i too am like OUCH OOF MY BONES

- aaaaaaaaaand rhys is back! will he get treated any better from here on out? i dont remember!!! guess we’ll see.

- bit much of gwen who’s actually known jack the shortest time of them all to be like NO, let ME be with him uwuwuwuuw

- ahhh!!! ianto smelling jack’s coat ;_;

- aaaand jack’s back too. AND HE GETS TO HOLD A CRYING OWEN? FOR ME? oh you shouldn’t have! this Almost makes up for all that rift plot bullshit (almost. i still know what u did.)

- ANDDDDD OH SHIT. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GOOD ENDING. HERE COMES THE TARDIS. FUCKING YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...............................and there it goes. one season down. sorry this one was so long!!! i love and appreciate anyone to takes the time to read these posts. thank u!!!!

[steroidusr]

golden sun (chaos mode hack) part 4: Isaac cannot resist.

so now that sand dollar lady is in place, we can push the statue on the tile (and strike a pose) but safely this time

yes, that certainly is what just took place

how exactly are you going to--

aaaaand he's gone

AM I SUPPOSED TO "WAIT OVER THERE" OR "HANDLE THE REST”

(man look at those tiles in the middle, that is some really nice pixel art)

this is the slowest lp in the world

wooo

things i thought was weird about this game when i was 11: kraden saying "Sol" and "Luna" instead of "the sun" and "the moon" i mean obviously i knew that that's what "sol" and "luna" mean, but he's saying them like people's names ("a picture of Luna")?? there doesnt... really seem to be a reason for this? i dont remember the sun and moon being referred to like that anywhere else in the game

by the way, what exactly is supposed to be happening with that laser? it's coming up from the floor, but... hitting the wall

????? 2d video game overworld perspective is really weird tbh

LET ME LEVEL GRIND, KRADEN

so if you touch the wall (or talk to it, depending on what you think the A button does) a portal appears

...which lifts you up and voips you away. but stays open. GOOD THING THERE ARENT ANY THIEVES FOLLOWING US OR ANYTHING

...and we end up here. (the portal also appears to have shrunk isaac's sprite a bit. wh...oops...?)

(fyi: for some reason this game's world is flat. so he does actually literally mean "the end of the world".) (...and "endless water", since it all falls off the edge but doesnt run out. dont ask me how that works. maybe it's like a fountain?)

....humans are made of fire?????????

kraden: "as i have told you many times--" (tells us again anyway)

jfc he's starting to sound like my dad also you absolutely couldve fit that last part into one text box, come ON

i really, really wish i could capture these emoji word balloons because

kraden: ❤️ jenna: 😟

YES. "MANY TIMES", IN FACT.

GARET WHY

so after telling us how powerful and dangerous these stones are... and how with just one you could conquer the entire world... and how it would be REALLY BAD if they were to fall into the wrong hands... 

...kraden wants us to bring them over here for him to examine. ok

all of them. all four of them. im pretty sure this is exactly why no one is allowed in here.

OKAY THANK YOU KRADEN

[each time you take a star, there’s a short earthquake, and more pillars rise up out of the water. this allows you access to the next star.]

UH, TAKING THAT CAUSED A SMALL EARTHQUAKE, THIS IS PROBABLY A BAD IDEA

CANT YOU JUST EXAMINE ONE, ISNT THAT GOOD ENOUGH

YOURE NOT HELPING

three hours and we're still stuck in the fucking prologue. fortunately we're almost done, probably

incidentally, did you know you can change the color of the text boxes in this game?

.... i cant make it the same color as steroidusr :(

anyway back to collecting these extremely dangerous world-destroying artifacts for funsies

UH-OH! NOBODY SAW THIS TWIST COMING

(i figured out how to cap all those adorable little emoji balloons, thanks to the miracle of save states. youre welcome.)

im pretty sure we'd have to hop through here to get to the last one, but....

unlike us, who only meant to simply borrow all of them at once, which surely would have no repercussions

how dare you overhear the plans we were loudly discussing nearby your house! ...and to you, at your house. wait what

hey it's the third dude who was with them who we only know about through optional and easily-missable conversations

...i just realized saturos has a blue undercut. too bad they dont have blogs in weyard.....

what if we just... gently put all the stars back. golden sun solved

so, uh.... if youre gonna have a dramatic "i thought you were dead" reveal you probably shouldnt have it this early in the game

like this is clearly meant to be an emotional scene, but we never got any time to actually, like... get attached to felix? which couldve still worked if we'd gotten time for Green Mask Guy to develop instead, and establish him as our enemy, or something then, plot twist, he was jenna's brother all along! ... which would work even better if we kept jenna around and she didnt get kidnapped like, have them kidnap garet or something, idk, jenna's a fire adept too so she could easily fill that party role anyway this way the Big Reveal would have way much more impact, and--

oh ok

yes, we definitely shouldve let garet get kidnapped instead

oh right, there's a fourth one too. alex does almost nothing of value through the entire game, yet somehow by the end he's the most important character ever, despite still having done almost nothing of value. he's also in the third game. he's still useless.

what do you mean "oh great", you were just about to hand them over anyway

are you guys, like, allergic to these things??? like you cant hold them yourselves if theyre not in bags????

YOU CAN FLY. YOU ARE FLYING RIGHT NOW. NO, I DONT UNDERSTAND!!!!

also, yes, the only way to the mars star is through here. so until we got it, they were planning to "hide", out in the open, in a place we would soon be walking through, right in front of the path we'd be coming to that place through

you guys couldnt have, like, waited back in the sanctum to ambush us or something? no? no. of course not.

WELL, YES,

also, shockingly, that star is never actually getting to that merry band of thieves. sorry for spoiling such an amazing twist.

--where it will stay, taking up an inventory slot, useless, for the entire game.

fun fact: golden sun, like the first generation of pokemon games, has no key item slot. we all remember how that went in engreen... also, each character has a separate inventory, which other characters cant access. so if, for example,  you have four herbs, you can either stack them all in one character's inventory, or spread them out among everyone. if you want to save inventory space, the first option seems the most reasonable... until the guy holding all the herbs dies in battle.

................i miss etrian odyssey

oh also the cave is collapsing now and we're all going to die

(does a thing) uh-oh! that fucked everything up! how could this happen! (does exact same thing three years later) uh-oh! that fucked everyth

WHO'S THAT POKEMON?

:(

anyway this guy's important, and he saves us later, but also tries to get us killed by a dragon for some reason?

he also blinks more than any documented living creature in the universe, as evidenced by these screencaps

how the fuck are you planning to get the mars star then

YEAH NO KIDDING

WELL WE DEFINITELY WILL BE IF WE KEEP STANDING AROUND TALKING ABOUT IT

THAT'S WHAT IM TRYING TO TELL HIM

hey, you know what a good place for this text box would be? right up there, completely obscuring the fucking speaker "uh, there's plenty of space there in the bottom corner--" "RIGHT. UP. THERE."

oh man ok alright here it comes

i fucking love golden sun

If the Elemental Stars ignite the flames of the four lighthouses, that power will be released. As long as the four lighthouses remain unlit...

im not sure why he's leaving out the part about the world eroding and inevitably being destroyed if alchemy doesnt get released? (minor details, i guess)

"seriously, there arent any characters over there at all, we could easily--" "COVER THAT FUCKER UP"

so he teleports us back to the sanctum. what a nice floating roc--

garet youre kind of a dick

i guess all the monsters evacuated, because no battles are happening. goodbye, experience points....

(there's an eruption. the mountain is erupting. youll have to take our word for it.)

"multiple times, actually. those googly-eye mushrooms are vicious"

WHY ARE THEY JUST CASUALLY STROLLING OUT OF AN EXTREMELY DANGEROUS ERUPTING VOLCANO

I CHOSE "YES” AS A JOKE BUT THEY ACTUALLY START TO CASUALLY STROLL RIGHT BACK UP

mom will you please stop being such a negative nancy

im not sure garet "what's an ocean" lastname even realizes other towns exist

The elemental lighthouses will loose that power upon the world. Once the power of the gems has been released, the whole world will...

i see the wise one is omitting that one li'l detail about alchemy actually being a good thing again

"the entire world could be completely destroyed" "darn :///"

"we cant wait around for someone to save us. isaac, go save us"

well, it's been quite a ride, but that's it for golden sun! if you enjoyed this livetweet, make sure to like, comment and fol--

-----siiiiigh.

we're fucked.

"SWEET JESUS GARET THAT'S NOT AN ORANGE, YOURE EATING THE MARS STAR"

anyway isaac's mom is disowning her son until he saves the world or whatever, but not before having this delivered to him

JUST LEAVE, GET OUT OF HERE

[frankthomas090-blog]

abby winter yoga - The New Angle On Abby Winters Lesbian Porn Just Released

In town for a bit on business, he wants to have some casual fun. 5 inches and THICK- his emphasis. Hes at the top end of length for my preference, but self describing it as thick got my attention. Sometimes theres just an instant connection or chemistry, drawing you in so fast with a new person you just kind of dance around the usual screening process.

Described his cock as 7. Average height, better than average build, green eyes. Hes my age, 31, but with the right combination of personality and body- I can look past it. Gimme that thick dick. This Ginger was respectful and straight to the point from the get-go on Plenty of Fish. Hes former Army- he had a pic up in his dress uniform. He sends me his number, we text briefly, and make the plan to meet that same day.

I appreciated his ability to be direct without being rude or vulgar. I like em young and hung! Also, I give it a 95% hes well endowed- orange is the new Black. At no point did he ask for nudes, or ask endless intimate questions- I give it a 50/50 chance of being a satisfactory encounter given our lack of communication beforehand, but I cant resist a Ginger to save my life.

He passed with flying colors. Im telling you, this isnt rocket science. I feel my lady business respond immediately. In our very brief texting we went over our Dos and Donts, as well as both agreeing we like aggressive AND passionate sex. Dont ever forget that.

The way hes kissing me I can already tell this will likely be a very good encounter. " Its early afternoon, what a great way to spend it. Upon his arrival I am freshly showered, bed is made, and Im wearing t-shirt that says "MEETS OR EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS. He sits next to me, we awkwardly exchange hellos, and then he moves right in to kissing me. Not overly eager, not sloppy, makes you want it right meow.

Hes not pushing my body down while shoving his tongue down my throat. He starts lifting up my shirt after pawing me and groping for the goodies- having discovered my nipples are pierced and briefly sucking them, its time for layers to come off.

He peels his layers off as Im taking mine off and comes right back to mauling me so expertly I couldnt resist. Hes kissing me like hes excited to see me, and hes real good at it. Hes maneuvering me onto my back while he takes a top position.

Moving his head lower he pulls my panties off but with such reckless abandon theyre still on my left leg. Good kissers are also known to be good lovers, from my observation. Youre taking your clothes off, too. I dont recognize the alphabet hes writing, maybe its Spanish.

The moment he kisses my thighs its all over. His eagerness to put his mouth on my slit is palpable. He didnt just dive face first into my nonsense salad- first he ran his tongue up my outer labia on both sides and it felt soft and gentle and GIVE ME MORE. Fuck God sounds totally different when Im cumming and yelling nonsense. Right around now is where I learned Im actually bilingual, but whatever language I was stuttering out can only be whispered or shouted; theres no in between.

Oh my god hes licking my asshole- I have sex Tourettes. Do you think Jesus and God can tell youre not swearing AT them? he pushes my legs up and licks up and down, then just down. I can barely take it, stretched to maximum capacity for comfort, and even then hes mildly uncomfortably large. And it consists mostly of very short, hostile sounding 4 letter words.

DONT STOP, DONT STOP, DONT STOP. Once he was done tracing and teasing I felt the warm, wet touch of his whole mouth open around my clitoris, moving his tongue in ways I cant imagine or describe. Holding my body close to his and pushing his hips up into me, my limbs instinctively wrap around him like a slutty octopus. His length is perfectly spot on- any longer and he just wouldve www.abby winters.com been too much.

GOD DAMN YOU HAVE A BIG DICK. Pushing my limits for size, I question if my lungs have enough room to inflate fully while hes all the way inside. Id put him right around 7 inches in length, my preference being 6.

With my pelvis lifted to the right level, hed shove his tongue in me as my insides start to contract with the orgasm. Literally cumming on his tongue. For sure hes wearing the biggest condom commercially manufactured, or a trash bag. My hips would buck but his arms would find their way around them and hold them in place, while my legs stretched upward trying to walk on the ceiling. We didnt transition out of missionary, he sat up and spread my legs wide while plunging into me with force and conviction.

He rolls on a condom and pushes himself inside me- my eyes rolled back so far I saw memories from my childhood. I sound maybe like a dying rabbit as my fingers pull his short hair and hold his head firmly in place. I didnt keep count, I was much too busy screaming his praises to the Gods.

He gets his and we collapse away from each other. As soon as I begin to cum, back go the legs, down goes the head, and hed ride my climax on his face. When I would start to climax, hed withdraw quickly and push my legs up around my head. He puts his underwear back on and Im guessing hes leaving now, sad times, but then he hops back onto the bed and I take the opportunity to snuggle up into his armpit and touch on his body while I bask in the afterglow.

He does this for every single orgasm. Im wrapped around him and mostly content. I cant get my mouth around it right, my hand doesnt wrap around it. Its awkward to handle, do I need a license? I feel like my certs are out of date because this newfangled cocktraption is just outside of my scope of experience.

Good Lord, who taught you to do that? I gift him my mouth because hes more than earned it. I could definitely go for more, but hes not some 20-something with endless stamina. He pounds away at me from different positions, I like him behind me because I like his stroke and how he braces himself by holding my hips down. Clearly he gets most of his satisfaction from pleasing his lady.

Im not going to argue, and somebody has been listening to my thoughts and dreams again because this man was made in a fucking lab just for me. The sun goes down around 4pm right now so thats not a good indicator either. what even is time, man. Im amused I come across that way- Im all about those afterglow cuddles.

Between our rounds we break for cuddles and snuggles- he confesses he assumed, from my profile on PoF, that he was to go after the first round and I wasnt much for affection or cuddling afterward. He enjoys the cuddles too, and doesnt like to just leave after a hookup unless thats her preference. Please me you thick dick Georgia peach!

Take care of your partner after you fuck them. He enjoys my head game but it just makes him want to fuck me. He gets off twice more and I have no idea how much time has passed. HOLD MEEEEEEEEEEE, pet my hair and tell me Im pretty. Fool I dont get to round 3 very often with men in their supposed prime, so whos more thrilled! Hes an intuitive partner and he reads my cues very well, plus he just wants to bring me all the pleasure.

Apparently he doesnt get to round 3 very often, and hes kind of thrilled about it. His size is intimidating and hes more shaped for vaginal feel goods. I like how he lays it down, and I like anal with the right partner. He admits hes never been able to have anal successfully, and I can understand why.

The way hes shaped, getting the head in is not the hard part- he gest wider towards the middle and base, like a fucking road cone. I dont doubt that hell follow my lead and respect my signals if things get too intense. The last time things started heating up Im on my belly and hes pressing the head of his monster cock on my asshole- Im doing word problems in my head about the likelihood of this being a good idea or not.

He apologizes for cumming too soon- I had to hold back my school girl giggle. He flipped me over and fucked me hard up until I told him to say my magic words. What a dear, sweet lover. He actually thought he owed me an apology after our FOURTH consecutive romp. Tell me you love fucking me. Ive got shit to do as well. 10/10 would fuck again.

I tell him point-blank Id like to see him again before he leaves, he happily agrees. We were unable to make it happen, he was just too big and we didnt do enough warmup, but I took about half of him before tapping out. He texts me asking what my plans are for the evening, as hed like abby winters galleries to grab a couple of beers and a late dinner.

Fast forward 24 hours. When posed with options like this, I always ask WHY NOT BOTH? I tell him Im going to shower and meet him at the restaurant bar near his hotel, he instructs me to bring my lube. I dont really do compromises. Or I could come over to his hotel room after and he could just fuck my brains out all night.

Maybe Id like to join him? In the time it took me to excitedly shower and keelhaul the warts off my body, my phone starts showing notifications of other interested men folk. The words fall out of his mouth and he explodes seconds later, to his own surprise. why end with a OR when theres always an AND?

He tells me I cant miss him at the restaurant bar- hes wearing a cowboy hat. (You thought that hyperlink went to the movie reference, didntcha? CANT TALK NOW, THICKEST DICK EVER WANTS TO TAKE ME TO POUND TOWN! Oh goody, I know what Im wearing later. Can honestly say hes a good one.

Test me, Ive got true grit. ) The company was great, hes fun to talk to. Cleaned up, its time for him to go he has things to do. As were leaving I ask how many Magnum XL condoms he has- he says 4. He confesses he doesnt generally have his lady spend the night because hes very affectionate and waking up next to someone hes spent the better part of the night pleasing, can lead to him having feelings.

We need to buy more, STAT. I feel like a teenager again. We talk about our kids, divorce, he tells me about his previous military experience, and what hes doing now. Rolling into Wal-Mart at that hour, with giant shit-eating grins on our faces, buying only condoms.

You think youre big, you aint big until you must have custom condoms. I get what youre saying, were gonna fool around and then I gotta GTFO. Sexy Ginger man with a good head on his shoulders and giant cock, somebody please snatch this man up quick haha or dont, and let him keep sharing that beautiful endowment with all the ladies.

Back to the hotel room, we barely make it to the bed and hes on me. Details from here are fuzzy, but he went down for ages and we fucked around in every position. Dont get it twisted; theres approximately 10 million condoms in my purse, but they wouldnt fit him. Remember, if youre hard to size on either end of the spectrum theres a UK company called TheyFit that you can enter your measurements into and theyll get you fitted with one of their 66 sizes.

We took a smoke break before trying www.abby winters yoga abby winters.com (linked site) again, and he tells me hes half Mexican. This perfect Ginger man is also a beaner. He was made just for me. While he was behind me licking and sucking my clit, shoving his tongue inside my pussy and my asshole, I hear the top of the lube bottle click. At some point I wore his Stetson when we come back inside, naked.

He positions himself at the backdoor and gently adds pressure until I whimper or tense up. Working together slowly, gently, following my vocal cues I take him to the base. Pushed to the hilt we pause. Its more than mildly uncomfortable, but if we take it slow itll feel great.

I can feel it cold and slippery, then hear him stroking it on himself. I swear to Kylie Minogue I cant make this stuff up. Im a little drunk- 3 drinks on a mostly empty stomach, Ill sit on your lap and call you Daddy if you want. He picks up the pace, we start talking dirty to each other. I have not been quiet at all during any of this, but now Im incapable of controlling the primal animal noises Im bleating into the bedding.

He was having some performance issues but was bound and determined to make sure I enjoyed our time as much as possible. I can feel him shaking a bit, hes going to cum soon. Its late, the booze and orgasms are sedating me.

Hes down close on me, wrapping his big hands around mine, entwining our fingers, crossing arms under my chin as he grinds into me. I tell him to withdraw slowly. I wake up hazily to roll over and his arms find their way around me again, hes a perfect big spoon. After several loud, amazing orgasms, he gets down close and pushes himself inside me all at once.

Rocking into me Im wrapped around him in my koala hug. Hes holding me and Im lost in it. I awake fully to him sliding down the bed, tossing my right leg over and burying his face in my morning pussy. Digging my fingers into his back and pulling his short hair, I dont want it to end. Im cold and reach for a sheet, he covers us immediately and Im back out like a light.

He slows down but hes plunging into me with the kind of force and quivering body that lets me know its now. Pushing my skirt up, pulling my panties to the side, he takes my box in his mouth and I hold on for dear life, staring up at the mirrored ceiling I get to watch myself almost cum in his mouth.

Morning sex was more passionate, and a bit briefer. Hes even kissing me with my dragon breath. We havent even hit the floor button yet. When we get to the ground floor we smoke together outside, recap our enjoyment with each other. My back hurts from how he so violently throws my legs back to eat my pussy while Im cumming, both my pussy and asshole are recovering from their respective stretching and beating, and Im walking on a broken toe.

We get dressed together, and he goes to walk me out but as soon as the elevator door closed he dropped to his knees. He tells me after two days with me, he wont be able to fuck for a week. God damn that was good. He reaches up, hits L, and continues his works. 10/10 would fuck any time. I am completely satisfied. This will happen one week from now, when he has free time again.

I scamper home to sit on frozen bags of peas, pound water, and cuddle all my pillows. tt/2i9A4Cy /u/DDfnord Link is directly to this story http://ift. This entry on my sex blog has hyperlinks, if youd like to see it in full I write on WordPress and the blog name is All The Dicks.

[obarion]

worst but fuckin most vivid and terrifying dream i ever had so im on this beach on a boat and im picturing this woman and shes just floating on a platform chilling a huge wave comes by and knocks the platform straight through her and shes dead but you cant see her shes swept away immediately im on a house boat with my mom she hated that visual we are on a beach and i have a bag with my ds in it and a few other things i set it down, a brown bag, and immediately it was swept away by waves while the waves were trying to drown me i struggle to find it, give up, and go back in the house boat. i wake up. reach for my ds. need to know its safe. why isnt it there? i get up and its all fuzzy. i know i was just dreaming. why am i across the room? i see a person who looks just like me, talking to me, who was clearly meant to be me. but the more i looked at her the less she felt like me, so i yelled "youre not me." and i shot up and pinned her on the ground "WHO ARE YOU YOU ARENT ME." she turns into tess. future tess. and this tess was dead. several figurines, packaged, hung on my door of decaying and shriveled tesses. she tells me to save myself, that im going to die. she tells me to get an appointment with a doctor immediately to check for breast lumps, because im going to die of cancer. and i wake up from that dream. and i run to my mother, who is on the phone, pleading her to get my a doctor or im going to die. she says she will and that she understands. i had this weird premonition that day that this girl was going to take me and tess in and tell me that im going to lose my eyesight and we would be isolated from the world, it was just weird. and i went to school that day. *a* school? not my school. but i thought it was my school. it was more like a big blue office building and it was inescapable and there was many different things like filing cabinets and a jewelry shop?? anyway i noticed that that day, sometimes everyone around me would change. all their heads would get bigger, their skin would wrinkle, their eyes would bug out, they basically looked like human caricatures, but their heads were weirdly only slightly bigger than their regular ones. and they would chase me at mid speed and i would have to run from them before they turned me into one of them. i was terrified. there was always people who noticed too, who were like me and trying to run. i didnt know how they would turn me into one of them, but i did know that they could. everything was out of control one day when i was at a school game up in the bleachers and all of a sudden everyone switched. everyone. i looked across the stadium and everyone was fucking switched. i had to fucking run. when i started to run they were pouring out into the hallways like the ocean in my other dream, fucking drowning me. i couldnt find my way out. i passed through the jewelry shop room and the shopkeeper tried to overtake me, i had to bash her head in her own bead container thing and run. everyone was these weird caricatures. it seemed like i was fucking going through hallways that i had already gone through, and i found tess in one of the hallways with me, completely fine. and while going through a hallway, a slender passageway with the thinnest door showed up motioning us to come in with her. it was the girl who told me i was going to lose my eyesight. she was latina and had a beautiful face and long black hair, but wasnt terribly hot and sexy. she looked like katie molina who i miss SO much she was great god bless. and she takes us in this purple hallway with stairs upstairs and downstairs. the upstairs ones dont seem to lead anywhere in particular. and shes like "haha you guys were in a pinch back there. youre staying with us from now on" lets call her claudia, i dont remember her actual name but when i woke up claudia immediately comes to mind i had barely talked to her before i asked her "am i going to lose my eyesight??" and she looks at me and she raises an eyebrow like she knows something and just goes "maybe" in a teasing way and its at this point i fucking know that she knows my entire fucking future. she takes me into this stadium under the stadium where im p sure there is an ice skating rink?? and A WHOLE BIG LOT of these caricature people are sliding around in circles, very calm. they basically tamed them. me and tess sit on a bench on the side and this girl with a bandanna and some cornrows (who may or may not be claudia?) comes up to us with a clipboard asking us about ourselves. shes really nice and everyone here is basically acting like this is normal life. they explain to me that this isnt an epidemic like its the zombie apocalypse or anything. it has the capacity to become that, but its been taking over high schools (my brain keeps fucking putting me in hs) and schools all over the place. they had a map of schools affected. a bunch of them close to each other or scattered about, like... it was a lot but not a shocking lot. but basically all these people who are in the state now arent coming out and theyre basically dead. this guy comes over to us. hes blonde, hes tall, he looks like a fuckin shoujo manga love interest. the best part is he dresses and looks like nolan, which prompted me to worry like hell. he has a shirt w the loch ness monster on it and it just says NECCY on the front. i knew it was supposed to be "nessie" misspelled but i didnt know why. so i decides to pronounce it as "necky" so im like, "why does it say "necky" on your shirt" and hes like "oh its a band. and its pronounced neçé" but he didnt sound rude when he said it, he sounded joking. this other guy comes over with slightly more guy fieri hair (think........ think shoujo tall, code geass clamp ass pretty boy... frosted tips.) and hes wearing the same exact shirt. and hes like "actually, HIS shirt is pronounced neçé and mine is pronounced necky." i think they were some weird variety of twin brothers. so from that point on, they were known as the neckys. and at that point i had it nagging in my mind nolan is probably dead everyone is dead except me and tess im going to go blind everyone knows whats gonna happen to me and wont tell me but im like, laughing with my new friends and its just weird and thats all i remember

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Man the manga makes it look so fun to be a Nobody!

I really marvel at how they captured the uncanny nature of the enemy Nobodies?? Cos seriously the whole point of them is that they look humanoid but move in really inhuman ways. And each individual enemy type has its own unique mannerisms for this, but in general its like..slugs? I'm pretty sure its slugs?? They stretch and squish and wiggle around and its like pretty much EXACTLY how medicinal leeches move, but thats a very underrated animal so its probably more likely it was slugs or worms. Like 'hey lets exaggerate slugs' but BELIEVE IT OR NOT THAT FATEFUL WIGGLIER SLUG DOES TRULY EXIST. And i love their cutie patoot lil faces. And the world needs to appreciate them more!

...ok im getting offtopic but you get the gist of what i mean. The basic Dusk enemies are vaguely humanoid things with their arms and legs tapering off into sticklike points, and they either wiggle them around like leech heads or hold their arms behind them naruto run style and use their entire body as a leech! Like its more likely that they pick up stuff by wrapping around it like a snake, rather than just using hands?? And also they can fly and stick to ceilings and just generally have loads of fun?? And look really pretty?? And some of the other more complex nobodies look even cooler doing their weird wiggle flying. Like the Assassin type have these weird big metal petal shapes on their arms that flutter like feathers and make them look like winged snakes crossed with.. Kites...? Kites made of kimonos? Being worn by a man with no face..?

SERIOUSLY WHO DESIGNED THESE FUNKY THINGS THEYRE SO UNIQUELY GENIUS

And aaa the Days manga has a REALLY good panel showing a big swarm of them in flight and it just looks SO MAGICAL AND SPOOKY! this is the exact kind of Aesthetically Nutso Ghost Monster Person i wish i could be! The manga is so cool at iimplying the same sense of inhuman motion by drawing them like motion tweens? Like theyre warped into wildly different body shapes in every panel and its just SO CREEPY and SO BADASS and SOMETIMES KINDA MAJESTIC AND ENDEARING EVEN! And this big flight scene has EVERY SINGLE INDIVIDUAL ONE drawn with its own different pose and mannerisms and like man every one of these weird squiggle flights looks like a world of fun to do!! God i love when superpowers actually look FUN, yo! It fuckin sucks that theyre just low level enemies and not ever playable. The only Nobodies that are playable or even get a big amount of screentime in cutscenes are the ones that ACTUALLY look humanoid and also move humanoid and BOOOO have zero traits of the monster theyre supposed to be. Like man just give me a whole game playing a lil bebby Nobody flying around! They remind me of the wanderers in Journey, they'd be so well suited to a chilled out exploration game like that.

And AAAAAA i get so sad thinking about how they're like bebbys!!! Noooo! Why do we not have more sympathy for them?? Like the particular way they write their 'bumbling weak enemy' scenes just comes off more like..well..sad thoughts about what happens when you lose your heart. Cos i mean the series really doesnt dwell much on the implications of the fact every single one of them used to be human! And whenever they're not being given orders by the higher ups in the organization, theyre just shown wiggling around flying in circles for fun, like a shoal of fish. They're so inhuman now, aside from vague resembelance in their appearances. They'd be seen as the cute wpodland critters in a disney princess musical number if they werent designated as monsters! Like they're not just 'dumb', they friggin dont remember how to talk anymore. And in their most memorable scene they dont understand the order "find this person" and can be easily tricked by photos of him. "Yes boss here is roxas he's a little more flatter than usual but here he is!" And they just keep gathering hundreds of the same person and never once cotton on to anything being wrong. Its so cute and also scary?? Cos seriously they are such eldritch monstrosities of fragmented soul that they move on to STEALING THE WORD PHOTOGRAPH. Just plucking it right out of the language! Failing so hard that you warp the laws of reality! I feel sorry for the poor lil guys, you definately cant say they didnt try as hard as possible!

AND SERIOUSLY THATS ALSO A COMMON TRAIT IN THE MANGA

I'm just so happy that they gave a bit more sympathy to the low level enemies because seriously WHO GIVES SUCH A GOOD DESIGN TO A LOW LEVEL ENEMY AND THEN BARELY EVER USES THEM FOR ANY SCENES

They actually give some sorts of pseudo dialogue to them?? Like during the kh2 prologue they show roxas being able to psychically perceive their thoughts while theyre trying to kidnap him. And its just so sympathetic and sad in retrospect?? They did a great job amplifying everything about this sequence because they made the Nobodies look so much scarier, made Roxas's life with his friends look even more heartwarming, and made it all super tense so you overlook all these little hints and just cheer for roxas in defeating these guys. But they left so many things that actually foreshadow that Roxas is a Nobody too, so reading this a second time is so sadddddd. I almost wish this was the first time i experienced the story, i think it does basically everything better than the original game version. Like seriously THAT ONE LINE OF WHAT THE WEAK ENEMIES ARE THINKING! "We've found you, my leige". THEY WERE JUST TRYING TO SAVE THEIR BOSS AND DIDNT KNOW WHY HE DIDNT RECOGNISE THEM. AND THEN HE ATTACKS THEM AND THEY DONT KNOW WHY!! aaa theyre just BABIES god theyre just ghost demon thingies that are like the larval stage compared to the main character versions. They dont remember who they were as humans, they just know they love their boss!! and he's apparantly been kidnapped by scary humans!! THEY WERE TRYING SO HARD TO SAVE HIM!! they got so damn close to taking over the town and they were swarming everywhere searching for him and Axel was trying so hard too and Diz just kept interrupting him before he cpuld explain or lying to roxas to manipulate them against each other! And axel even brought cake and icecream with him!! He was just trying to rescue his lil bro!!! Auuuugh seriously it was such a good twist that the Scary Monster Dudes were objectively in the right throughout this entire intro, and they just wanted to save Roxas's goddamn life. And he didnt even get to remember his peaceful days as a family with his fellow monster boyos until like five seconds before dying :(

Did anyone else just.. Not want to play kingdom hearts 2 after the prologue?

Like i couldnt stand the mood whiplash of going back to happy go lucky disney worlds with sora and having no more deep sad intriguing plot points for like ten hours of gameplay. And i could never take Organization 13 seriously as villains when the entire damn prologue was them being SUPER FUCKING SYMPATHETIC and the 'good guy' trying to murder a child in order to bring sora back. Like why am i supposed to be happy that he succeeded when i know sora himself would say no if he was told what sacrifice had to happen to bring him back? I would have been way more interested in this sequel having me play as roxas and try and take on the legacy of sora as the next hero and try and find a way to bring sora back without anyone having to die. Like the whole story could be people being all 'blah blah youre worthless youre not human your only purpose is to die for the sacrifice' and we explore all different sorts of 'heroes' doing horrible acts and justifying it to themselves because some people are just 'born evil' and its okay to do whatever you want to them. And Roxas is always struggling with almost believing that shit about himself, but in the end he does succeed to find a happy ending for everyone without a need for 'sacrifices'. And he learns to have self confidence and form his own identity and have more friendship scenes with Axel and co and also redeem all the other Nobodies please and also hug the tiny enemy childrens ones. I just did not feel much for the plot of kh2 at all except for the Nobodies!! Its just not sympathetic to have your 'heroes' arguing that 'oh they dont have hearts theyre not human they dont feel anything so theyre all evil and its all fine'. The game acts like this is true despite giving sympathetic backstories to half of them and the other half all die crying that they want to live!! What the fuck!! Like the only consolation is that they clearly cottoned on to the Org being RIDICULOUSLY POPULAR and later games literally bring all the most fan-loved ones back from the dead and add EVEN MORE sympathetic backstories and also here have a bigger villain who was really responsible and also he lied to them and theyre NOT really empty hearted and incapable of love. THEY ARE CONSTANTLY SHOWN HAVING THAT, EVEN THE WEAK LIL ENEMY DUDES HAVE ALL THAT LOYALTY TO ROXAS AAAAGH THEY DIED IN DROVES TRYING IN VAIN TO SAVE HIMMMMM

And god theyre so cute and so well designed and so sad and im sorry but AGGHHHH

I Forgot I Had So Many Emotions For The Emotionless Bebs :(

...also i really wish i cpuld get this pic of thos one panel to upload cos it looks real cool. I didnt think anything could make me love them more!!! Theyte just innocent weird snake bird worm person mannequin origami things. They just want to flutter around like messed up butterflies! And adorably poke at things they're curious about, and hold brooms awkwardly with their squiggle hands! The manga shows them doing lil chores around the house!! I LOVE THEMMMMMMM

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Happy mother’s day to Johanna from pokemon. I mean.. happ day to ALL the game moms, but seriously wtf is it with this series and giving them absolutely zero role in everything. Johanna’s still the best we got, but I hold out hope that maybe she could be even more of a thing in a sinnoh remake! And oh man, does anyone else really miss unnamed johto mom? She had the most plot presence as a gameplay aspect yknow, even if she didnt have PLOT PRESENCE. i really really really REALLY loved sending a portion of my income to help my virtual mom, and her buying me cute dolls to decorate my virtual house with. I went APESHIT for Staidum 2′s feature to see your custom room in full 3d on the menu screens! ^_^ Plus like.. just... a bank was a REALLY necessary addition to pokemon and its been much harder to manage money in every game since GSC because WHY DID THEY REMOVE IT?? If people disliked the mom buying you gifts feature, then they shoulda just brought back mombank with gameplay balance changes or customization options or whatever, not removed it forever... But of course the most important part is that it reminded you of your virtual mom existing and let you have some cute phonecall conversations during the journey! I just really really love poke-moms. As someone who kinda Very Much Lacks a real good mom, it felt really happy to imagine i had a fictional one. Why does pokemon keep missing this great opportunity!! And its also why im kinda sad all the professors stopped being like grandpa figures and now the player is supposed to see them as attractive or whatever. Theyre like my teacher yo! Thats not gonna happen no matter how sycamore he is! Oh but its actually why i really adore kukui even though he’s the most fanservice professor design ever, they still gave him cute mentorly interactions and a dadlike personality! And he’s even canonically a dad figure to one of yor rival friend characters, even if its up to the player to decide if you wanna see him as your buddy or as your videogame crush, lol But just... MAN I really miss Johanna!! She still had a really minor role, to the point that you only know her name if you get lucky enough to face her in the randomly generated Contest finals. But THAT is why i loved her! She actually reappears later in your story and helps you out, and is implied to be having her own adventure behind the scenes instead of just sitting in that house with one line of dialogue for 90 hours of gameplay. Actually, even, I loved the easter egg that she did actually (very rarely) change dialogue when you go back to get your pokemon healed at story-important points. like when team galactic blows up the nearby lake you can go visit her to heal up after the boss fights and she’s actually like HOLY SHIT YOU NEARLY DIED IN A LAKE EXPLOSION SON/DAUGHTER! And she fusses over you but she still lets you continue journeying after this moment of hesitation, believing in you that you’re the only one who can save this world. I just fuckin love Johanna! And.. like.. she’s kinda the closest we got to my secret dream of Champion Mom Wants To Fight. it was equally surprising to see her suddenly appear as the contest champion, even if its a completely missable easter egg. It was still nice to be able to kinda battle with your parental figure in a friendly competition of love and hugs. Also it’s good fuel for a thousand headcanons of her somehow knowing wallace from rse and etc. ALL CONTEST FRIENDS KNOW EACH OTHER, YO. Pokemon contests are THE BEST, please give us more of them and continue the Actually Having A Plot As You Defeat Them thing from ORAS! Lisia was the bestttt Seriously just imagine like... Contest plot of sinnoh remakes actually revolves around giving momma johanna some more screentime and development and backstory and like... maybe even she could appear in the main plot too? Even if its just like the thing of the gym leaders being stated to be fighting the rest of team galactic offscreen so you can reach cyrus. Maybe TG attacks a contest hall or something as the final part of the contest sidequest, and you and mom have to fend them off while simultaneously doing the contest finals. ‘Hey is this part of the show?’ cliche. Kick ass in the prettiest way! It could be really cool as a unique kind of bonus contest match, like a doubles contest where you have to work with your partner to make combo moves, or like a hybrid of battling and contests where you have to maintain a certain tv ratings level during the fight. JOHANNA IS BASICALLY METTATON OKAY, THIS IS MY HEADCANONS She just... has so much personality for someone who does nothing in the whole game. Why WHY do we never get enough mom? Do they just assume everyone has a real mom... man I was really happy tho to have sun and moon address abusive parenting as a main plot and also give some more personality to the mom character even if she’s still not really a plot presence. and like everyone is a parental figure in this plot! Bunni’s fifty moms and dads and at least two grandpas! even if The One Original Mom still didnt get enough screentime im glad i could project my sadnesses onto every kahuna ever And also rescue my new best friends from Literally My Actual Mom: the Videogame Character! Lusamine fuck off, i wanna see johanna again >_>

...so yeah basically pokemon moms this game series has been a constant comfort during my childhood when i was suffering from the bad mom stuff, so im glad it continues to give me the ol good mom wish fullfillment feels even as an adult i love unnamed slightly more screentime sun and moon mom i love contest star johanna mom i love mystery bank plush toy gifting mom i love even smaller role gen 1 and 3 moms even i love slightly medium sized role but really no personality unova mom 1 and 2 i love super cool kalos mom who’s so heavily set up as being a thing and then sadly never gets to have more than the every game regulated tiny screentime allottance I love every mom dad and grandpa-y pokemon professor I love 99% of all gym leaders who need more damn screen time too i love the kahunas making up for all that gym leader neglect AND being more parental than ever before i love the goddamn villain bosses that somehow end up being Officially My New Dad every damn time i love how the only truly unforgiveable fan unfavourite villain bosses are the two child abuse bastards i love kicking their ass with catharsis power and then going back to my million virtual family members and pretending i could do this in real life and everyone knows i inexplicably love charon from gen 4 cos he’s Slightly More Grandpa Than Every Other Villain i love games about found family and stuff... i wish pokemon would realise that its one of these games, yknow? sun and moon seemed a lot like a good step in that direction. i think if was able to play that game as a kid i would have been able to realise i was being abused. its really important to address these subjects in children’s media, yknow? and just GOD it sucks that the only way i dont get sad on mother’s day is wasting hours thinking about fictional 2 lines of dialogue moms from a dumb monster catching game aaaaaaaaa johanna why u no be real