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themonopolyhat · 2 months ago

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shoulder the sky: the Doll au

another AU spawned in the chat with @shootingstarpilot, cleaned up and preserved for posterity.

featuring helix (originally belonging to @swmoddy) and el pilot's own needle and stitch. this trio has me in a chokehold at all times. <3

what follows is 4100+ words of family by way of magical realism. in which i am nice to helix, for once!

behold:

Envision if you will a world not like ours, where everyone has the same face and new people are not born—they begin as small, plain Dolls made of cloth and seeds and yarn.

It goes like this: a person suddenly Receives a Doll. Everyone knows what they look like, even if they're not all totally identical when they arrive. The arrival of a Doll is always without warning, and nobody knows exactly how it happens.

One day, you don't have a Doll. The next, you do. Some people get two or three at a time. Some go for years without ever being a Recipient.

It's the Recipient's task to carry the Doll around with them, keep it safe, talk to it, show it new things, clean and mend it if necessary. Most people come to love their Doll. They imagine the sort of person their Doll might be.

Eventually, with no set timeline, most Dolls begin to Breathe—that is, the tiny cloth Doll is replaced by a living grown person. Many Recipients keep in contact with their Breathers long afterward, because it's something like a parental/sibling relationship, after all.

(It's said that a neglected Doll can die. Sometimes a Doll arrives damaged, or incomplete, and the Recipient has to figure out how to help as best they can. If a Doll is destroyed, it's a cause for genuine mourning—that was a new potential person, and the Recipient will never get to meet them now.)

oOoOo

Helix has been Breathing for ten years and working as a doctor for six, and he's never Received a Doll.

Until one day he does.

He is too stunned to immediately process this. He picks up the recognizable Doll Pouch from its place on his floor, feels it gently. There's a Doll inside, he can tell.

A Doll. He has a Doll.

He is not ready to have a Doll. But he's not about to let this one die, so. He supposes he'd better get his shit together.

He carefully undoes the cord and opens the Pouch. The Doll slides out with a gentle shake-shake-shake.

He cups it in his hand. It's smaller than he expected, though he's of course seen many Dolls before, tucked in others' hands and pockets and hats. It's floppy-limbed and has a squishy, seed-filled belly.

There's something not quite right about it, though. Helix immediately notices.

Two different fabrics. The body is one color, and the head is another color. Neat stitches connect the pieces together, completely purposeful, and the proportions are prefect. But the Doll has had its head entirely replaced at some point before arrival.

Helix touches the squishy belly and considers the blank cloth face. “What happened to you?” he wonders aloud, softly. “Did the celestial Doll factory hurt you and have to fix it before they kicked you down here? That's kind of a shit start.” The Doll is silent. “Well. We'll see if we can't do better from now on.”

oOoOo

On his way to work the next morning, Helix stops for two things: a coffee, per usual, and a waterproof protective case for the Doll. It's small enough to ride around in his pocket, he just figures the fewer bodily fluids it gets splashed with, the less he'll have to clean it.

Helix feels awkward as hell talking to the Doll. He feels a little bad not talking to it, though, even if it isn't really listening yet. (Or is it? Nobody recalls their time as a Doll, but everybody ends up influenced in some way by that time, all the same.)

“I work at the hospital,” he tells it as he carefully tucks it into its new case. “I'm a doctor. I specialize in critical care, so I'm usually in the ED or ICU. Hope you're okay with blood and weird smells.”

The Doll offers no opinion. It seems comfortable in its case, at least. Helix tucks it into his pocket and pats the new lump. He'll have to get used to this.

By the end of the first day, everyone in the hospital knows Helix has a Doll.

By the end of the first week, Helix talks to his Doll more than he talks to anyone Breathing.

The Doll goes everywhere with him.

He carries it around the apartment, and soon there are usual spots where he sets it so it can observe (so to speak) what he's up to.

It sits by the knife block when he's in the kitchen. Helix has Opinions on coffee, curry, and noodles, which are the only three food groups he can prepare for himself. Otherwise it's takeout.

He sets it on his nightstand at bedtime. A habit quickly forms—he touches the Doll's mismatched head, just a quick brush of fingers over the cloth, and tells it to have sweet dreams. (The first time he realizes he's been saying “Sweet dreams, kiddo,” he has to reevaluate himself for a few minutes afterward.)

When he's watching TV, the Doll sits with him. When he goes for a run, it's secure in his pocket. When he goes to the store, to the bank, to the park, to meet friends, it's with him, always small and still and perfectly receptive to anything Helix has to tell it.

It witnesses him at his best. At his worst.

He accidentally drops it in the trash one morning without realizing, and is frantic for a solid hour until he unearths it. “I'm so sorry,” he tells it over and over while he gently washes it with soap and water. “I'm so sorry. I would be so sorry if you were gone.”

He has to admit, sooner rather than later, that he loves having a Doll. He loves this Doll. He can't wait for it to Breathe, and say something back to him.

oOoOo

And then. Some weeks later. Maybe a month and a half.

Another Doll arrives.

The new Pouch sits on the floor, very close to where the first had been.

Helix stares at it, dumbfounded. He takes his first Doll out of his pocket and eyes it suspiciously. “I don't suppose you know anything about this?”

The Doll says nothing, of course.

Helix keeps it in hand and scoops the new Pouch up, setting both on the counter and turning on the overhead light to get a good look at the newcomer. Little gods, he thinks, ten years without a single Doll and now he's got two. It's not usual to get two staggered like this, he doesn't think.

He unties the cord and tips the Pouch.

A few loose seeds spill out.

Helix blinks. Oh, shit. That's Doll stuffing. Not supposed to be outside of the Doll.

��Damn, are you hurt, too?” he murmurs, reaching in to carefully extract the Doll. A couple more seeds fall from the Pouch.

It's immediately apparent that yes, this one is hurt. More than that, it's... lopsided. The proportions aren't quite right, and the pieces don't match well. There are a couple of places where the seams aren't snug, and the Doll is slowly bleeding seeds when it's moved in certain ways.

Shit. Shit.

Helix very, very carefully gathers the loose seeds into a pile and addresses the Dolls in turn. “Hang tight, newbie. You, watch your brother. I'm going to have to give him some grafts.”

Helix doesn't have any fabric that remotely matches the new Doll, so he cuts up a clean pillowcase, digs out a suture kit that snuck home with him at some point, and gets to work. Some of the seams just need reinforcement, but others need patched with the pillowcase fabric. The seeds are tucked carefully back into the Doll's body before it's closed up.

The result is... well. Functional, more than it's aesthetic. Helix isn't crafty. The grafts—the patches are neat and sturdy but hardly symmetrical.

Helix sets his forceps down and nudges the two Dolls together, looking at them wearily. “At least you're both a little mismatched now, huh?” he says, smiling crookedly. “And everybody's in one piece. That's progress.”

He hesitates, touches the new Doll more gently, aware that he's mostly handled it in a utilitarian fashion. “Welcome home, I guess is the thing to say. Sorry you had a bumpy start. You'll be okay now. Your brother apparently lost his entire head at some point, but the new one is doing just fine.”

oOoOo

Helix starts to fill Doll Two in on the things Doll One has learned, all the while chiding Doll One for imagined impatience. “I know you know this, but he's new, he doesn't know it, and you don't have a mouth yet to pass it on. So cool your little rag feet.”

They ride around in Helix's pockets, but he sits them together whenever possible, because it seems right. They prop up against each other so naturally.

Doll Two goes missing one day during a double shift at work, and by the time it turns up in the on-call room Helix napped in, he's an absolute mess. He's had to forcibly stop himself from squishing Doll One too much, like a stress toy.

He takes both Dolls into a bathroom and locks himself in a stall and hugs them both to his chest, biting his lip and swallowing the urge to sob. “I am terrible at this but please don't disappear on me, okay?” he whispers finally.

Helix can't remember what he did with his time before he had his Dolls. He wasn't bored, really, or lonely. But his days seems more full, now. Bright and anticipatory in a way he's never experienced before.

He wants his Dolls to Breathe. He wants them to live.

He can't wait to meet them.

oOoOo

So of course, the first one to Breathe does so while Helix is sound asleep.

He wakes up a little past midnight. Squints at the clock, then reflexively checks the Dolls.

There's only one sitting in the usual spot. Doll Two, slumped over a little without its companion.

Doll One is nowhere to be seen.

Helix is out of bed in a second, flipping the light, squinting and swearing and checking under the bed, inside the bedclothes, what if it fell—

He smells coffee.

It's strong, and strange enough to catch his attention. Did he turn the pot on and forget...?

Scowling, he picks up Doll Two and hurries out to the kitchen. He will keep looking for the other once he's sure he isn't burning his apartment down overnight.

A person stands at the coffee pot, examining a mug. He turns to look at Helix, a bright smile breaking into place the moment they make eye contact. “Hello,” he chirps. “I borrowed your phone to learn how to make coffee. Do you want some? I'm Needle, by the way. And you're Helix.”

Helix is, on some level, aware that he is standing like a complete feeb with his boxers slung low and his mouth hanging open in shock. The person in his kitchen is wearing a towel knotted around his waist and nothing else. He looks like Helix, of course. Superficially. His hair is different. He has no scars. And that smile is several degrees brighter than anything Helix has ever produced.

Doll One is Breathing. He's alive. His name is Needle, and he's making coffee at one in the morning.

Helix swallows his first three responses. "Hey. Yeah. Are you feeling okay? Everything, uh. Go okay with. Everything?"

Doll One—Needle, he's Needle—snorts. "I feel fine. Are you okay? Do you need a doctor?"

Helix rolls his eyes and gets his feet moving, padding the rest of the way in. "I am a doctor, thanks. I'm just surprised. When I saw you last, you were a sack of seeds on my bedside table."

Needle's smile goes lopsided. Fuck if it isn't charming. "Yeah. But I'm here now." He looks down at the remaining Doll in Helix's hand. "I hope he Breathes soon, too."

Helix inhales and refuses to let any sort of mist creep over his eyes. "Yeah. Me too."

The coffee pot bubbles. They're quiet a moment.

"Welcome to being alive, Needle," Helix tells him finally, reaching out to set a hand on his shoulder and squeezing gently. “I'm glad you're here. Really glad."

Needle grins and hugs him tight in return. "Couldn't have done it without you, I bet."

oOoOo

Helix dresses Needle in some of his own clothes—they're the same size, at least—and sits them down with the coffees. And they talk. Needle is... brilliant. Breathtaking. Annoying, and charming, and sweet.

Helix would have avoided him, probably, if they'd met under other circumstances. Unfortunately, he loves him already.

"You were so much more tolerable as a Doll," he growls into his mug after yet another terrible pun.

Needle just laughs, unoffended. "Too late to go back now, boss. You missed your chance."

"I should have gagged your little Doll face as a hint."

"You could always give it a shot with the little one?" Needle smiles at Doll Two, which remains quietly slouched on the tabletop where Helix set it. "Maybe he'll be even worse."

Helix picks up Doll Two and addresses its little blank face solemnly. "Do not listen to a single word your brother says. He's a terrible influence."

“Slander."

"I blame his mismatched head."

“Slander."

There's so much to do, but first: sleep. Helix staggers back to bed, and Needle crashes on the sofa. Doll Two gets placed back on the nightstand.

oOoOo

There are all kinds of programs set up to get new Breathers established. There are classes to get them oriented, case workers to get them housed and employed, funds to support them while they get situated. Helix takes Needle to a local center to get started, and together they read the literature and watch a short video with a couple of other new Breathers.

Afterward, armed with a thick folder and a schedule for the next few weeks, Needle asks if they can go get lunch together. Helix tries not to let his shattering relief show—he hasn't figured out how he'll say goodbye now that his Doll (his first Doll) is moving out and on with his new life.

"So Helix," Needle says once they've gotten their food and tucked in, "there's a couple of flyers in here about getting too attached to your Recipient, or your Recipient being too attached to you. What do you think 'too attached' means?"

Helix blinks. "I'd guess it probably means in the bad way. Like if you were afraid to be away from me, or if I was trying to force you to stay. You know, instead of letting you be your own person." He smiles a little, squashing the sadness. "You're not a Doll anymore. You have your own life now."

“Okay, that's kind of what I thought. But you're not creepy, and I don't feel like I can't do things on my own. I definitely can."

Helix pats his shoulder, proud despite everything. "I believe you. You'll be amazing, provided somebody doesn't sew your mouth shut and kill that budding career at the auction house."

“Rude." Needle steals fries from his plate in retaliation. "I was gonna say, I already know some things for sure. You're a doctor, so you make good money, yeah?"

“True."

“And you could afford a way bigger place if you wanted, right?"

“Yes? But I don't need anything bigger, I'm happy with the space as it is..."

“What if I wanted to stay?"

oOoOo

Which is how Helix ends up browsing for a house before the day is out. A house with three rooms, because as Needle puts it, a spare room is always practical.

(Neither of them mentions Doll Two or implies a single thing. It's just a spare room. Practical.)

The case worker insists on talking to Helix and Needle, once Needle makes the plan known to her. She interviews them separately and together. Helix wonders whether she's more or less mollified when he tells her that Needle is the most annoying person he's ever met—and whether it reassures her that Needle just laughs at him and hugs him, cooing about grumpy sleep deprived Recipients.

In the end, a case worker can't actually stop a Breather from doing what they like, so the plan goes forward. They find a house fast. Buy it without a hitch. The move is quick and aggravating, as moves are.

Needle is full of plans for decorating and enhancing and having friends over, when he makes some. "And," he announces with relish as he breezes out their brand new front door, "I think I want to be a doctor, too. Write me a good reference letter!"

oOoOo

Life goes on. Helix has one Doll in his pocket now. Doll Two goes everywhere with him, still. He talks to it, pats its little head and body gently, keeps it close. It sits with him and Needle when they eat together, watch TV together, look over Needle's schoolwork together. Needle is going to be a brilliant doctor, Helix can already tell.

They fight. They make up. Helix apologizes, sometimes with words and sometimes without. He privately tells Doll Two he's sorry if he makes it nervous about Breathing.

"I suck with people sometimes," he informs it. "Turns out it's easier with a Doll. But you should Breathe whenever you're ready, okay? Take a lesson from your brother and don't let me get away with being a jackass."

oOoOo

So it goes. Life goes on. Then comes the day when Helix is getting dressed to go to the gym, and he turns around to grab Doll Two and it isn't where he left it on the nightstand. Instead there's a person sitting on the edge of his bed, bare and new and staring at him with huge eyes.

Helix does not yelp. That would be undignified.

(He might have jumped a little.)

"Shit. Sorry. Good fucking gods, you need a bell. ... Sorry. Hi."

The new Breather says nothing, just watches him carefully. Helix feels terribly inadequate and thinks of yelling for Needle—but no. No, he carried his second Doll for so long, he wants to properly meet the new person. He can do this.

"Sorry," he says again, smiling a little and easing down to sit on the bed too. "Let's start over. I'm Helix. Are you feeling okay?" He recalls the Doll's weak seams and bleeding seeds, the patches he'd applied on their first night together. "Does anything hurt?"

The new person frowns, visibly considering. He looks down at himself. "Nothing hurts," he decides. His fingers flex slowly. "I was a Doll, before now."

"You were."

"I'm not anymore."

"You're not." Helix has no idea where he came from, this serious and quiet person who's spent most of his existence in proximity to Needle, or at least the Doll that would become Needle. “Why don't we get you some clothes and something to eat, huh? Got your name figured out yet? It's all right if you're still thinking about it, you're new."

The new Breather nods silently and doesn't offer a name. That's all right. Helix figures he might be overwhelmed. He digs out clothes and offers them. "We can take you shopping for your own things, but these should fit for now. —Oh, if you figure out you're a girl or something, just let us know."

That gets him another thoughtful frown. It isn't until the newbie is dressed that he speaks again. “I'm not a girl," he says. "I'm Stitch. And I don't feel okay."

The doctor in Helix leaps to the fore, which is handy because it helps tamp down an immediate burst of panic. "Thank you for telling me, Stitch," he hears himself answer levelly. "Can you tell me more about what doesn't feel okay to you?"

Stitch hugs himself, picking at the edges of his sleeves. He's quiet for a long, long minute.

“Everything is too much," he says finally, his expression unhappy. "It feels too loud. Too big. Like I'm going to unravel and not Breathe anymore."

"Sounds like you're anxious, at the very least. Let me check some things, okay? I'm a doctor."

“Okay, Helix."

It's the work of minutes to rustle up his stethoscope and take Stitch's vitals. His pulse is quick but strong, and his lungs sound fine. His pupils are responsive and even. Reflexes are good.

“You feel overwhelmed? Is that a good word for it?" Helix asks quietly.

Stitch nods, hugging himself again and tugging at his borrowed sleeve cuffs.

"Can you think of anything that might help you feel less overwhelmed? Do you want to be alone for a little while so you can process...?"

Stitch shudders and shakes his head firmly.

“Okay. No to being alone. Maybe music?" Also a no. "We could sit quietly a while. Do you want a hug?"

That gets him a pause. Stitch meets his eyes, looking lost. "I wish I was a Doll again," he says. “That's how it feels. Like I want to be a Doll in someone's pocket."

Helix doesn't think twice about that, he'll figure out later what it means. "Well, here, let's stick you in bed under the covers a while, you can pretend you're in a pocket and we'll see if that helps."

Stitch has no objections, though his frown doesn't abate as Helix tucks him in, pulling a blanket up around his head and shoulders. "Give it a few minutes and see if you feel better, okay?" Helix pats Stitch's leg through the blankets. "I'm going to message your br—Needle. I'm going to ask Needle to bring a glass of water and some cereal for you. You don't have to meet him until you're ready. Sound okay?"

"Okay Helix."

And it goes like this: ur bro is Breathing. DO NOT COME RUNNING IN HERE. he's overwhelmed + in my bed for now. bring water + cereal to door, thx

He sends it. There is a muffled thump from elsewhere in the house. A return message arrives in seconds: OH MY GODS OH MY GODS IS HE CUTE WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM IS HE OKAY I'LL GET THE CEREAL BOSS NO PROBLEM WHAT'S HIS NAME DOES HE KNOW I'M HERE TOO

And then, immediately after: vitals?

Good fucking gods. Helix loves that idiot.

As promised, Needle knocks very softly a minute later and passes the water and dry cereal in. Helix clocks the anxious look on his face and is glad he asked Stitch about more company in the interim. "He says you can come in, but," and Helix gives him a stern look, "you have to be quiet. Gentle, okay? He's new and not as excited about it as you were."

Needle nods vigorously and mimes zipping his lips shut.

(It's not that Helix doesn't trust Needle to be kind. Needle is incredibly kind. He's just also got enough energy to launch a rocket into orbit.)

"Stitch," Helix says, sitting back down by the blanket lump's legs, "Needle brought you some water and food. Can you sit up and drink a little bit, at least?"

Stitch stirs. Peers out of the blankets. "I have to?"

“I guess not, but I recommend it," Helix tells him easily. "Dehydration doesn't help with anything."

Stitch considers this. "Okay Helix." He shuffles in place, sits up. Takes the water and carefully swallows some of it down. His eyes find Needle, who's sat down at the foot of the bed and is vibrating in place, from the looks of things.

"Hello," Stitch says. "I'm Stitch."

Helix's heart twists a little at the sheer sweetness in Needle's answering grin. "Hi, Stitch. I'm Needle. I'm sort of your big brother—Helix carried my Doll around, too."

"Oh." Stitch looks between them a moment. "You were both waiting for me?" Off their twin affirmatives, he bites the inside of his lip and picks at the blankets. “Was it hard to start Breathing, Needle?"

"No," Needle replies promptly, smiling, "but Helix says I have the attention span of a cabbage, so I probably just didn't pay enough attention to anything long enough. It is a really big thing to get used to, isn't it?"

Stitch nods mutely.

"You want to go back in the blankets?"

Another nod.

“You want company? I can keep secrets, and I'll tell you all of the best ways to get Helix to swear. It's funny."

Helix opens his mouth to interject and snaps it shut again when Stitch says, "Okay."

Which is how he ends up sitting quietly, reading, while Needle and Stitch huddle under the blankets and are quiet and whispery by turns. It's fine. He's very, very proud of Needle. He'll just have to make an effort to undo all of the terrible ideas he's putting in Stitch's head.

#shoulder the sky #shootingstarpilot #fic snippet #doll au #slowly extracting juice from the chat to preserve in long form yeehaw #my writing #helix the clone medic #needle and stitch my preciouses

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atdoop · 5 months ago

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still waiting on the news post they said they're gonna release that clarifies things, but with these new artfight rules i'm probably not going to be able to participate now. basically they have new rules disallowing a lot of fetish art, specifically calling out "overly exaggerated proportions" and art that has "extreme emphasis on certain parts of the body". a lot of people have correctly pointed out that trying to moderate stuff like this is basically impossible and that they should just, you know, improve their reporting and filtering features or something.

it's getting real fucking annoying how every site is trying to sanitize itself of anything remotely weird or sexual. instead of letting people tag and and filter stuff themselves or mark their pages as 18+ only places they're punishing everybody who genuinely wants to follow the rules and prevent minors from seeing their art.

their filtering rules are so self contradictory and vague it's infuriating. nudity and gore is okay if you filter them, "non suggestive collars and harnesses" are fine, but "overly exaggerated proportions" are not allowed??? how do you draw the line??

anyway, i really hope they walk this back or something. people have been talking about it a lot lately in regards to other sites but i'm pretty much of the opinion that trying to ban nsfw art from art sites is pointless and harmful, especially when you start getting into vague definitions of fetish art, which can be literally anything. selfishly, i wish these sites just wouldn't allow minors at all.

also, on a personal note, i think this has been particularly frustrating to me because how i draw is an extension of my self identity. i'm drawing how i WANT to look, leech is ME!!! and i imagine a lot of people who draw stuff like i do feel similarly!! i was really really looking forward to artfight and i'm so bummed now. sorry if this is incoherent i have a lot of thoughts about it

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pianocat939 · 2 years ago

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I just finished watching the movie , and now I’m wondering what if Yandere romantic Leo either rivals or working together with platonic Yandere Casey jr with a reader who acts motherly to them HCs please if possible thank u 💕

It's 2 AM and I stayed up the night before so this is all sleep-deprived writing.

This is kinda long so prepare your attention span. Also I didn't add much motherly aspects only because I focused more on their rivalry between each other rather than their reactions to MC.

Tw: Manipulation, Mentions of trauma (not that surprising lmao), just a younger father and son having a cat fight

Rivalry with Romantic Yandere Leo and Platonic Yandere Casey Jr. with Motherly MC Hcs

(Jfc that's a long-ass title. Also gonna confirm that although motherly and such terms are used but MC is gender-neutral as always).

If someone were to summarize the rivalry between the two it's really bickering back and forth until push comes to shove. I suppose the level of severity can differ based on their relationship (as in what point of the movie/or how long they've known each other).

I'm gonna use the plot of the movie because the plot of the movie.

At the start, before Casey even arrives at the lair, Leo's "unhinged" feelings haven't awakened yet. He harbours romantic attraction but has no urge to be crazy.

He flirts with you, but of course, he's a dumbass sometimes and ends up being the flustered one.

Then, Casey arrives. Let's just say in the future, you're the other substitute parent of Casey. So obviously he's gonna be clingy in the first place.

Casey will praise you for being so nice/caring/mom-like and is giddy. Meanwhile, Leo's frozen, resting face is present, his thoughts like 'This random dude with a photo of us is talking to my crush?' or 'Am I not the center of attention now?'.

During the interrogation, he'll ask Casey "Who does Y/n get married to?" very quietly though. His presence is slightly threatening, enough that Casey dislikes it.

The boy won't answer, and instead say, "He's nothing like you." *Cue intense glaring from both of them*.

The reason why Casey doesn't approve of current-time Leo is because Dilf Future Leo has manipulated future you to the point of acceptance. So, Casey has a very engraved view of what his secondary parents act and look like.

Present Leo gives murderous and unsettling vibes to Casey that he feels he needs to block off whoever this phony is.

Leo, who has newly unlocked his darkest feelings, doesn't like the attention being stolen from him. He's the only one you should rely on! Not this weird kid that oddly enough has a family picture of not just the group but also you + him!

Ok, I'm done with that proportion of the rant.

How will the two express their feelings/thoughts? Leo, who's opened a new eye to reality, will pull his usual card, manipulation. Meanwhile, Casey is like a clingy child who won't let his parent be taken away from him but is more mature obviously.

Throughout the plot, Leo will try to use his familiarity as an advantage saying things like, "I don't think we should use his plan, since we don't really know him that well." Casey, who's intelligent enough to see through the manipulation, blocks the comment. "Look, I know the Kraang better than you, so we'll have a higher chance of success if we use my plan."

Skip to the part where the group gets split up. You're with the 'B' team and like in the movie, Leo and Casey are stuck together. Casey says the trauma lines but at the end of it he'll point out how Leo is nothing like Future Leo (like goes into much more detail). This breaks Leo and starts a whole era of war between the two.

When you guys reunite they're gonna be clinging to your back, insulting each other quietly. If you try to ease the rising tension they're pulling a whole 180. Praise and compliments all the way.

After all the self-sacrifice shit and like everybody going through hell, they can't seem to detach themselves.

Surprisingly enough the two start to tolerate and work together more. As they see a common purpose: keep you safe. However, when it comes to attention, they're going at each other's throats.

In a humorous scenario, Leo's trying to flirt and be all lovey-dovey but Casey is asking for head pats and hugs which leaves Leo unable to succeed through his awkward methods of romance.

As a small bonus, if only the three of you are in a specific place Casey might call you and Leo "Dad/papa" and "(preferred parental name)". This triggers Leo's ego as he realizes that he is in fact the spouse.

People that crush on Dilf Leo are just people who like his triple-layer forehead wrinkles. Convince me otherwise.

——————————————————

I desperately need to sleep...Wanted to write this before I do.

- Celina

#rottmnt #yandere rottmnt #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere tmnt #tmnt #tmnt2018 #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #Leo #Casey Jr.#tmnt x reader #rottmnt x reader

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gunmetal-ring · 2 years ago

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anon again. i'm sorry that i keep coming to you with this depressing messages but you seem like one of the few sane ppl in this fandom and i appreciate your honesty.

truth is im feeling really disillusioned with hellcheer lately. we don't have a lot of "canon" content so after a while, it gets tiring going thru the same 2 scenes over and over again (especially when one of them involves chrissy's death). ive been relying on fandom but it seems like it's slowed down. fics arent updated as frequently, not a lot of new artwork.

heck, even joe and grace have moved on. joe's career is taking off. grace is leaving acting. it just feels like everything that happened last summer has come to an end :(

Aw anon thats okay. Ty for thinking of my feelings though 💓 (and also im flattered that you think im sane lmao)

Unfortunately its the way things go, especially with small ships, especially especially in a fandom as hostile as this one is. People come together and build community and share their love for characters and then g(r)o(w) their separate ways again.

But not everybody does! You and me, for example. And ive got plenty of hellcheer mutuals that seem perfectly content to draw, write, and rb their little hearts out.

I for one am absolutely astounded that theres even a fandom for hellcheer, let alone one with such talent and breadth and depth of love! Our characters had 2 scenes. Our girl was killed just as it all began. Our boy died with her name on his lips. In all likelihood we will never see them together on our screens again.

But somehow. Those ~10 minutes managed to foster an entire community of people and keep us engaged and in love w the characters for almost a year at this point! With no dangling promises or false hope or anything! Like we all know the score and we still go hard for hellcheer. Incredible.

Idk maybe it's just bc ive only had brainworms like this for 2 other ships and 1 of them is even smaller and the other one is a clusterfuck of unimaginable proportions, so im a little biased in terms of community/fandom, but im just like... idk. I think its really incredible thats all. And a testament to the very real power and truth of hellcheer 🥰

All i can say anon is that the best way to keep a fandom/ship going is engagement. Likes on tumblr and kudos on ao3 are great. But whats even better and more motivating (and i say this as a fic writer/meme shitposter so im speaking the total truth lol) is reblogs and comments. Tell people how much you love their work and how much it means to you, it goes a very long way. And on the flip side of that - stay out of the infighting. All it does is sap your mental energy and the fandom infighting bullshit is a major contributor to why people leave. The negativity and bitterness warp your perspective and make it really hard to remember what we're here for - it's not anti-st*ddie or anti-qu*nn stans or anti-anti-hellcheer or what the fuck ever. We're here for hellcheer!

Sorry my $0.02 is now $2.00 bc i ramble lol its a fatal flaw of mine. Anyway im sorry if this is annoyingly positive or dismissive but im in a strangely upbeat mood rn so there you have it

#im not getting into the whole joe/grace career stuff bc ive talked abt it a million times and i dont want to invite more bad faith anons #op #hellcheer #ask #anon

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heymeowmao · 1 year ago

Text

2023.11.07 - https://weibo.com/l/wblive/p/show/1022:2321324965501234446524

LYN: Hallo everybody, good evening. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. Welcome! LYN: Long time no see, long time no see.

C: It’s so early! LYN: Are you not home yet? In that case… what do you want me to do? Let me pause and then start again when you get home. We really want to provide the customer service mentality, here. A customer’s satisfaction is always the priority. Let me stream when you get home then, okay?

C: Monthly streamer. LYN: Stop provoking me. You mean to say that I only stream once a month, right?

C: How long have you been streaming? LYN: I just now turned it on. So that fact that you were able to come immediately means that you are my good friend. It’s like if I opened a restaurant- as soon as I open the doors for the night, and you are the first person in. You are my first customer. - C: Why can’t I see the comments? LYN: If you can’t see them that means that you’re lagging. Exit the stream then come back in. - C: I’m also the first to be seated! LYN: Yes, yes. I’m sure that those of you who came in right when I started the stream all pay attention to me very closely. You watch everything I do- so as soon as I started the stream, you came in. That means you are very indulgent of me.

C: Are you in Hengdian? LYN: … What do you think? You can tell by my background that I’m in Hengdian. Or else, this is all fake?

C: You’ve turned into a monthly streamer. LYN: I mean… there’s a reason behind that, you know?? How could I turn into a monthly streamer just randomly. There has to be a reason- I have work, so I started streaming less. But as soon as I have time, I will come to stream! Don’t worry. Therefore, stop pushing me. I don’t stream for a reason, it’s just that sometimes I can’t tell you what that reason is. C: Why? LYN: I can’t tell you. Otherwise people will accuse me of having a big mouth. I should say less. C: Who said that about you?? LYN: There are people who say- a proportion of people- who say that I- I don’t dare to take up the label myself, but some people are calling me a living “insider”. Everything I say is particularly thrilling. But being a “living insider” means that I can more easily take the heat for things I say. So from now on I want to be a “dead insider.” Okay? Less problems are better than more. C: Nonsense!! // You’re not “dead”!! LYN: It’s okay! It’s like I’m trying to comfort children- “pei pei pei (knock on wood!!)”

C: No! Ning-ge, you are the person in my heart. LYN: Oh, you don’t need to be so polite. You should date or marry when you need to, don’t wait for me. Be someone better- be the “woman that even LYN can’t have.” [t/n: his fans who get married call themselves that.] Thank you.

C: The Dalian accent is too strong. LYN: I’m from Dandong. I can speak Standard Mandarin, but when I’m streaming I just want to make it feel more alive, so I use my hometown dialect. But I CAN speak Mandarin, because I use it when I’m acting. For example if I’m in a guzhuang drama… there’s no way I can just be speaking in my Dongbei dialect throughout, right? I still have to use Standard. LYN: For example, if someone came over, I should say, “Who goes there? State your name.”, but if I were to use my Dongbei dialect, it’d be more like, “Who’s there? Who’re you?” That doesn’t work. So I normally do speak Standard, but for my stream I like to use my accent to sound friendlier/closer to you and a little more humorous. - /starts reciting tongue-twisters/ LYN: Not only can I speak putonghua, I can also recite tongue-twisters. :)

C: It’s snowing in Dongbei. LYN: Yes, I’ve seen. The weather’s gotten cooler, so- especially those from the South- remember to keep warm. You can catch a cold too easily. Now that it’s cold out, you should go out wearing a face mask. Don’t get sick. LYN: Hengdian hasn’t snowed yet. It’s still okay- around 20C- pretty hot. I mean warm, not hot! XD

C: I’m from Guangdong, it’s so hot! LYN: It’s so curious, isn’t it. South (warm) vs North (cold). C: In Shanghai it can drop to the tens in a single day. LYN: Wow. Then, remember to keep warm. Please don’t get sick.

C: Ning-ge, did you purposely leave some stubble behind? LYN: WhAT?! I shaved before I started streaming! Am I so manly, now? I JUST shaved and now someone is saying I purposely left some stubble. I guess it’s pretty apparent? I washed my face and shaved before this stream. Most of the time I’m shooting a drama, so when I don’t have any activities for the day I don’t shave- so I can look more manly. But now you’re saying I left it there purposely. Now what? I guess I can only look into getting it waxed. I’ll look for a painless hair removal and get it waxed.

C: I’m suspect this is a recording. LYN: There’s no need. I’ve already said- the charm of a live stream is that there is on- and off-line simultaneous interaction. If I had recorded one and am uploading, I don’t think it would be very meaningful.

C: What’s up with your hair? LYN: I’m wearing a wig.

---------- Promo Time

LYN: Why wasn’t I playing any of my recent OSTs up until now? Because I was waiting for people to come into the stream. That’s right. You are now listening to the tv drama Wonderland of Love’s ending song called 如果爱记得 (If Love Still Remembers) sung by Modern Brothers Liu Yuning.

bgm: 如果爱记得 (If Love Still Remembers) [Wonderland of Love OST]

LYN: This drama is actually very good- I turned it on yesterday to watch some. It’s not bad. The actors are cool and the plot is good. These two actors are so good-looking… It’s has a good plot, with good-looking actors- I watched an episode yesterday. You can support it, if you have the time. It’s called Wonderland of Love. If you have nothing to watch, you can watch this because… I sang the OST. LYN: Also if you look carefully in the credits, there’s also a character called Mu Xianhe. That’s my cameo. :) It’s rare that I would cameo in a drama- I’d do it for my good friends. So for this drama, I made an appearance. Three scenes total. I’ll probably only show up in the later few episodes. But the roster is really respecting me by adding me into the credits. In this case I’ve acted in it, got credited for participating, and sung a song for this drama, which is not bad at all.

C: Which episode? LYN: I don’t even know. Nearer to the ending. 30 something. I’m not too clear on it. C: Do you have three minutes? LYN: Aiyoo, of course~! How could you ask me to cameo, but give me less than three minutes of screentime? Of course I have more than that! Let me think- three scenes, plus music, plus slow-motion, plus other people’s lines… let me calculate. I should have at least… 8 minutes worth. LYN: At the time someone had recommended me some OST work, for which I was thankful for. Then later they asked me if I wanted to cameo. I said… “It’s not impossible.” So they found a role for me to cameo in. But my main question was whether or not this cameo’d role would have any interaction with the main leads or not. Did I have direct scenes with JT or XK? I didn’t want to go and just act with other supporting actors- then what would be the meaning in me making an appearance? Just to be a background character?? I mean- it’s not that I would be against the thought, but the meaning would not be a impactful. But they clarified that my scenes would be directly with the leads, so I agreed. I haven’t collaborated with either of them before, so we can consider this a fleeting collab. It’s likely that I won’t get another chance, so I just wanted to know how it felt.

C: Commission. LYN: There’s usually no pay for cameos. Usually it’s friends cameoing in other friends’ projects, so how much money do you think is appropriate? Do you think it would be proper for me to go and ASK for 2000RMB? Or do you think I would say, “Since I have three scenes I’ll give you a little bit of a discount and only ask for 1500RMB?” It’s not worth it. It’s such a big project- an S-tier- they’re not lacking in the funds, so it’s not like they can’t afford to. But I can’t really do anything with that money, so I might as well not accept payment and do it as a favor. I didn’t ask for money- I went for free. But they gave me an OST to sing, right? I was paid for that. Not a little amount, either. The jianghu isn’t about fighting and killing, the jianghu is about people and relationships, right?

LYN: Anyway, this song is called If Love Still Remembers. It’s another song I really like.

-- 如果爱记得 (If Love Still Remembers) [Wonderland of Love OST]

C: It sounds sad. LYN: /sigh/ It’s all about the heart-wrenching break-up. The feelings are a must.

LYN: Honestly OSTs, album songs, and live performances are all different. For a live performances, what you want to focus more on is the atmosphere/mood. You want the audience to feel what you’re feeling, so you will need to put “fuller” feelings into it. But when you’re singing OSTs, comparatively, you should be holding back. Not too much, but more than in a live performance. Why? Because you need to understand that the function of the OST is to act as a foil to the plot of the drama, and not serve to take the focus away. You can’t be too aggressive with it, otherwise you would be stealing attention away from the plot- the actor’s lines or their feelings. That’s why whenever I sing OSTs, I will restrain myself just the slightest bit. Of course, that’s not to mean that I don’t sing with any emotions at all. For albums, it depends on individual preference/attitude, and that’s a whole other story.

C: How are you so knowledgeable? LYN: If you have nothing else to compliment me with, you don’t have to force it. What “knowledge” could I have? This is something that anyone with a brain can figure out.

C: How come there’s a little breathy croaking sound? LYN: /clears his throat/ My voice is a little uncomfortable today. And… don’t you think that speaking like this… is very magnetic? // For any new friends who are coming in, please don’t think that I’m greasy and I’m making this voice on purpose. I’m not- my throat hurts. - /starts singing with ~feeling~/

LYN: It’s so sad- it makes me want to cry. So- if you don’t have anything to watch these days, please check out Wonderland of Love. I did watch it. I rarely have the time to watch dramas, but it so happens that I had the time. I watched all the episodes that came out- not in their entirety, but I watched here and there. I wanted to take the opportunity to learn something. Because as a new actor there are many things I need to learn. The last time I streamed I said something along the lines of “for young actors like me” and by “young” I didn’t mean that I was young IN AGE, rather that in this industry I count as a rookie. So my job now is to learn more, think more, and see more. That way I will be able to grow.

-----

C: Have you watched Romance on the Farm? LYN: That’s my good friend’s drama, how could I NOT watch it? What is a friend? If it’s a friend, then I have to take a look. I really did watch it, though. I don’t have very many friends in this industry, but for the ones I do have, I always check out their dramas. LYN: Honestly though, I can’t watch the whole thing. I don’t watch from beginning to end, but I always check it out.

C: Have you watched Mysterious Lotus Casebook? LYN: Of course. I watched it, how could I not. Also- it’s such a great drama, how could I miss it? Why do I say it’s great? Because first of all, I sang the OST. By that I mean: it’s not good BECAUSE I sang the OST, but rather it’s good SO I sang the OST. I’M benefitting from this situation. LYN: On the day it aired actually I was watching it with- one of the main leads. We were having a meal together, so we watched it. That got me thinking- when my drama airs, I should invite a bunch of friends over to my house. I’ll get some food and some beer, and we can watch the broadcast together. I can do it. // I’ll invest in a color tv- a 45 inch color tv. Then call all my friends over and make a night out of it.

C: We are also friends. / Ning-ge, didn’t you say that your fans are also your friends? Then, we are going too. LYN: Eh… I know we are far apart (distance), but our hearts are together. It’s not important where you watch me from. We’re friends, aren’t we? Your house is my house, right? So you can watch at home, and it will equal to you watching in my home. LYN: I know I said “your house is my house”, but I was just being polite. If you want to survive in this society, you have to learn to discern when people are saying things to be polite. They’re not actually being serious. It’s just out of politeness, don’t take it seriously. Someone asked me, “Is my mother your mother?” We’re just making friends. I’m not here to take someone on as my godmother. We’re just making friends, OKAY?? - /Daimi barking/ LYN: See? Daimi doesn’t even want to hear it. As for your mother, I can only call her “Auntie.” Anything else is unwarranted. “Auntie” or “Sis” is okay.

LYN: There’s a downside- despite the fact that I am a new actor, it does not change the fact that I AM acting- which is, that when I watch dramas it’s difficult for me to get invested in the story. It’s hard for me to feel what the leads are. Why? Because I just objectively want to see how the actors are executing the scene. How did they act the scene? Was it realistic? Why did they decide to lift their glass at that exact moment? Why did they look at the other person right then? I want to analyze and pick apart their performance. Then sometimes I make some predictions- I want to predict what their next move will be. Sometimes I guess right, sometimes wrong. If I don’t guess right, then I learn something. If I do, then I won’t act like that in the future.

LYN: So when I’m watching dramas most of the time I do it to learn, to see how other people are acting, how they design the scene, and if there is anything particularly challenging. I’m just starting to learn this industry, though I’ve been filming dramas for four years- now I have just a tiny bit of understanding towards acting. Very little- I don’t dare to say that I know how to act. But through what little understanding I gained in the past four years, sometimes I am very accurate with what I’m seeing. Like if an actor remembered their lines or not. If they’re familiar with their lines- I can tell. Or whether they were in character, or if they were still thinking about their lines. Are they thinking about what to say next? Is there some real emotion behind their eyes? Those are all things you can tell by looking. LYN: It’s not to say that I am professional. It’s just because I also act, so through observation I can figure out what’s going on. It does suck though, because due to that it’s difficult to become invested in the plot. - /acts it out himself to show us the process. says he likes it when he guesses correctly. XD/ LYN: You can imagine- throughout the whole drama I’m just sitting here guessing how they’ll execute what comes next.

C: Do you act like that, too? LYN: What do you mean? It’s not definite- there’s no right and wrong way to acting. Just like with this- /picks up the glass/ drinking and then looking to the side- isn’t wrong. It’s not wrong. It has nothing to do with acting incorrectly or badly. I’m just guessing what their next move will be. It’s like Rock-Paper-Scissors. You’re not wrong if you play rock/paper/scissors. You can play what you want, but the point is to guess what your opponent will play. I’m just playing.

LYN: What other drama came out recently that I sang for? There’s none, right? I only had the mission of promoting Wonderland of Love today? I guess there’s also Dragon’s Roar. It’s a character song I sang for NiShuiPan. That’s also a nice song. I’ll play the video for you later when I need to go break up a fight. Don’t worry.

C: Ning-ge, is your clothes 1 layer, or two, or three? LYN: It’s just one. It’s a fake double-layer. Stop staring at my clothes.

C: Ning-ge, the MV was too cool! LYN: It was so strange, that day. I don’t know what happened, but I was in a pretty good condition that day. Inexplicably, we filmed it and it came out looking quite nice! At least I thought so. I don’t know why my face was so thin, that day. I don’t know what I did- but I came out looking nicely on the camera. It’s all good. As long as you like it.

LYN: That’s why I think it’s better if I’m thinner, so I’ve started to lose weight. I’ll be joining a drama crew and starting filming again soon, so I’ll start with adjusting what I eat. I didn’t really eat today. I only had some Purple Seaweed and Egg Drop Soup, a box of Chinese crepes, one large order of fries, a cup of hot chocolate… and a chicken wrap… plus a bunch of chicken wings… and a fried drumstick. I only ate that much- the whole day. I’m really hungry. C: Wow, that’s so little! /sarcastic/ LYN: No, seriously though, I need to start watching my weight. So that I can look good on camera.

C: Are you working out? LYN: Not with a whole routine, but these days I’ve been doing some training for my back. It’s good for men to train their back, at least. It helps with posture, too. For guzhuang dramas, their requirements for posture/physicality are a little higher. For modern dramas, on the other hand, it’s all about acting naturally- you can’t keep straight posture the whole time. You may just sit there casually, and it’s all okay because it doesn’t matter. But for guzhuang dramas you have to have some rigidity- so I have to train. C: Your posture is very good already. LYN: It’s just average. I’ve seen the post-filming editing for a few dramas. But it’s not as if in 500 scenes, you can be stiff for all of them- there’s no way I can do that. I’m guessing there are a few scenes here and there where my condition is not the greatest, but for the most part it’s good. So I want to thank all those people online who were critical that my posture wasn’t great. Sincerely. Because they’re the ones who made me realize that this is very important. LYN: When I was acting before, I didn’t pay attention to a lot of things- because I didn’t understand, then. You all know I jumped into this blind. That’s why I was unprofessional. I didn’t have any demands for my hair or makeup- it used to be that I would accept whatever the stylists put on me. I thought that an actor should adhere to the role, so I just silently did the work I was asked to do. In reality things like hair/makeup, clothing, and posture are all very important. I want to thank those people who were criticizing me, because honestly they were right. I realized that, and start trying to improve myself. That’s why posture is one thing that’s not a big problem for me, now. It’s because I had that realization.

LYN: Truthfully speaking, if the people around you only compliment you- because my fans all love me very much, so they think I’m handsome no matter what I do. Even if it’s a lie, they’ll be able to tell it to me. It’s because their feelings toward me are different. On the other hand, people who don’t like you are often times more capable of pointing out your faults. For example, “You’re ugly.” That’s okay too, because the truth is that I’m not very handsome. That just means I have to be more aware. For example when I was shooting a drama I was looking really fat/swollen, then starting from the next drama I started a routine of using guasha on my face each morning. Friends, when I get the chance I’ll shoot a vlog on how to use guasha to reduce swelling for you. - /describes the whole process/ LYN: I used to get into hair and makeup half asleep, and just let the artists do what they want. I was in a daze. But now I’m so energetic! Because I’ve been busy taking care of my face. I start right when they’re applying the wig. It’s a good thing. If no one every told me I was ugly, I would have never known. It’s not as if I suddenly look better, but I at least have to hold myself to higher expectations. C: Drawing a “pie” again. // You only do it two times a week, don’t you? LYN: No- I was doing it every day. C: What uses does it have? LYN: Reduce swelling, for one. And two- it makes your skin look nicer. Your tendons, too- for example the double chin. You rub the neck tendon here, and here (on the collarbone)- so that they can relax/loosen. You press them like this. A lot of actors are super into skincare/maintenance. Gao Weiguang gifted me with a muscle scraper. I don’t know if you know what it is… it’s like… a piece of metal- you use it to scrape your tendons/ligaments to relax them. Then your posture will be a bit better. He gave it to me on set one day, and I started using it immediately to rub at this part just under my collarbone. I went home that night and took off my clothes to shower- it was just a ring of red. LYN: 筋膜刀. Muscle scraper. It’s not like what you’re thinking- /makes a cutting motion/. You can look it up. I just can’t discuss anything too fashionable with you. You know what a fascia gun (massage gun) is, right? You use it to relax your muscles? The fascia “knife” is just a piece of metal and you use it to scrape yourself. Have you never had guasha done before??? Friends, you should go out to find a massage parlor and get some guasha done. Look around- there are lots of those places around. If I wanted to be a beauty blogger or share my life with you, you wouldn’t get it! D:

-----

LYN: Someone keeps spamming, asking when I’m going to hold my concert. Stop spamming. If you were REALLY my fan, you would know why I’m not holding my concert yet. Stop pretending that you care. If you were my fan, you would know when I plan to hold it. Stop repeatedly asking. C: Why aren’t you holding it? LYN: Because I can’t get my tickets to sell! Are you satisfied with that answer? I’m not holding my concert because I can’t sell my tickets. Now I don’t want to hold it, because it will look embarrassing. Other people have a concert and can sell-out in 0.5/1/3 seconds. I can’t sell out, so I’m not holding a concert. Are you satisfied with that answer?? LYN: That’s a joke. I’m not holding my concert because my schedule this year is too full. I don’t have the time to hold a concert. Do you think it’s as simple as making an announcement, going one day and coming back the next? It needs preparation! Even just rehearsals can take up to half a month. A concert isn’t a joke like choosing some songs, grabbing a mic, and singing like you’re in a KTV. You need to design the stage and everything else. Rehearsals only- without all the equipment and stage settings, even though they don’t need my supervision- are so complicated. As the person singing, rehearsals for me take half a month. I’ve run out of time, this year. All of it is dedicated to filming. The most important thing is that I haven’t released my album yet. I have enough OSTs to hold a concert, but I was hoping I could hold my concert after I’ve released my second album. Then, everything will be lined up.

LYN: Stop spamming! It effects other people’s view. You’re all customers, here. Why are you spamming??? This is like if you go to a restaurant to have a meal and you take off your shoes as soon as you’re seated. Do you get what I mean? It’s not against the rules but other people find it annoying. Okay? Stop spamming. Thank you. C: The customer is here. It’s my first time watching. LYN: Ah. What we want is returning customers. If it’s your first time here- I’m sure for a lot of you, it is- please subscribe to my weibo. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. If you come once, we’re friends. If you come a second time, then we are good friends. LYN: So, welcome to all the new friends and please subscribe to my weibo. I haven’t started filming with the new crew yet, so if I have time I will come to stream more often. Wait- Wow… somehow I’m digging my own grave. I’m willing to stream, though! It’s just that sometimes… I am unable to.

LYN: How about I sing a song? I haven’t sung in a long time. Let me sing two. Even though my throat is uncomfortable, I can still manage two small songs. How does that sound? You can just listen for entertainment. /thinking/ I won’t be singing Dragon’s Roar today. How about this- wait for me a second. Let me use the restroom and then I will come back to sing for you. Since you like it so much, I’ll play you the video.

----- break #1 [t/n: Plays the mv with comments on. There are SO MANY. I’ve seen people describe it as looking like a virus. This one’s actually better than others I have seen- in which the whole screen is covered in text the whole time.]

LYN: /giggles/ We have a Sanitation Committee, here. Every time I use the restroom and come back someone asks me if I’ve washed my hands or not. I need to shake my hands to prove that I’ve washed them.

C: Ning-ge, did you “like” your own video? LYN: Usually I “insert coins”. Any video that’s related to me, I will invest in.

LYN: Let me sing a song! I have’t been able to sing lately, so let me find one or two to sing for you. C: 雪落下的声音 (The Sound of Falling Snow) LYN: Okay. It’s been snowing recently, too. In that case, let me gift this wonder to you. I hope you like it. / Let me find some shades. Listen for entertainment. I just want to say again: they way I sing during my streams is not representative of my working ability. I don’t want to mess it up here and have it affect my OST work later. Alright? The focus here is to be “happy”. This is a gift to all my good friends in the stream. LYN: Hold on. We need to create the mood. Wait a sec. /sets up his mic stand and grabs his guitar/ C: Hand-sync. LYN: What nonsense are you saying?!? This is called “performing”! What do you mean “hand-sync”??? It’s fine as long as I don’t lip-sync, isn’t it? Let me raise the chair higher, otherwise you can’t see my guitar. Ok. Let’s go. C: The guitar strap is broken? LYN: No- this is just the string- I can’t talk about anything fashionable with you.

LYN: /hand-syncs/ Doesn’t it look like I’m playing? :) -- 雪落下的声音 (The Sound of Falling Snow)

-- 黑夜一束光 (Praying)

C: You’re not singing anymore? LYN: No, I’m going to switch it up. Whatever you want to hear. It’s weird, because before when I sang in my streams, people would end up leaving. Now I don’t want to sing because I’m afraid it will affect my dream as a singer. I want to be a singer, but whenever I sing people leave. I can’t take it. It’s a blow.

-- 落了白

LYN: What should I sing…? 笑红尘 (Laughing at the Mundane World). I do have the accompaniment, but I… I’ll sing it for you next time. I keep forgetting to download it. It’s a bit of a hassle to look.

C: 摩登爱情 (Modern Love) LYN: I think I sang that once before, right? It’s this song, right? I’ll sing it, but I think I forgot most of it. Just listen for entertainment. LYN: Let me make some adjustments. /radio effect/ Hello? Welcome all my radio listeners, good evening. This is Modern Brothers Liu Yuning Radio. Welcome and thank you for tuning in by your phone. The hard part about this song is that you start singing as soon as it starts! - /trying to get the timing right/

-- 摩登爱情 (Modern Love)

LYN: It’s been a long time since I last sang this song. Did I only sing it once before? This will be my second time. I remember I had learned it that day (the first time). Listen just for fun! C: It sounds good~ LYN: I sing just averagely.

LYN: Let me think… how about one of MBY-laoshi’s songs? Let me see if there’s a track. … Oh? There’s not! … There’s no track!! D: … If that’s the case, then there’s no helping it. - /looking for the track on a different app./ LYN: It has it! Let’s do it. I really like this song. I even heard it in concert, and I really liked it. So after I got home, now I will often listen to this song. It’s called… -- 平凡的一天 (Ordinary Day) LYN: !! There are no lyrics? No matter how much of a fan of his I am, I still can’t remember the lyrics! Don’t do this to me. What is this?? There aren’t- /sighs/. I can’t even remember the lyrics to my OWN songs, let alone his! Hold on, let me change a song. Let me see if this song has lyrics. If it doesn’t, then I give up. -- 给你给我 (Give You Give Me) LYN: There’s not. /gives it a try/ /sighs/ I’m not singing it. I don’t have the lyrics prepared. /sigh/ Let’s forget it.

- /arguing with fans about a track which LYN says is not there and fans say is/ LYN: I told you that track wasn’t available, but you’re insisting it is. Are you the singer here, or am I? I know better than you do! - /video is frozen/ LYN: You just had to insist- you made me look through two different sites for nothing! Forget it. I’ll forgive you. LYN: … LYN: Great, now it’s frozen. /sigh/ You just had to make me look. Now the video’s frozen. I’m going to blame everything on you making me look. LYN: Now what. We’re done for. - /troubleshooting/ LYN: I don’t think I can save it. If it keeps on like this then I can’t keep streaming. The camera’s broken. Let me plug it back in and see if I can save it. Hold on. ~ we are now experiencing technical difficulties ~ LYN: /sigh/ Thank you. I was busy trying to fix it and none of you left. Since none of you left, I’m sure you are all my family. Nice. // I’m surprised I was even able to get it back. C: Time to upgrade your tech. LYN: OMG, I’m already using the best there is. C: There’s an echo. LYN: ? Is there? Oh no. // There’s not? Maybe there was a little bit, when the program started up again. LYN: You still hear it?? / Oh, it’s clear now? Okay.

C: Change your equipment? LYN: Friends, no! I have the best. All that I have is very expensive equipment. Let’s not change it. This time was the camera- the other time my computer was aliens (t/n: Alienware?). It’s very expensive. C: Then you haven’t streamed in too long, so it’s out of date. LYN: Stop calling me out. - C: That sweater looks like something my mom would wear. LYN: … I don’t think I’m wearing the same thing as your mom. This is men’s clothing. - C: You have to use streaming equipment often. LYN: Reasonable. I’ll do my best to use it more often. But I can’t just stream every day. I should still do some work. C: Stream 800 times in one day.

LYN: How about I take this camera and aim it at my bed. We’ll do a “daily-life livestream”- you can see me when I’m on my bed and playing with my phone. It’ll be like a security camera, what do you think? /sarcastic/ “Okay”? You must be a pervert! LY: I really can change it, though. Because I’ve seen that some new ones were released, so I was thinking I should get a new set.

-----

C: You’re trending. LYN: What number? Please don’t trick me, friends. /looking it up/ /checking the comments/ Oh, I see it. LYN: It’s in the Entertainment tab. That’s enough. C: Since you’re trending today, are you going to change your outfit? LYN: There’s no need to. It’s not any high-ranking topic, so I will not change today.

C: Ning-ge, was Lingyin Temple fun? LYN: People nowadays… can’t have any secrets. I was in Hangzhou a while back, right? The day before I was supposed to leave- I hadn’t much travelled around Hangzhou, only a very long time ago- but I went to visit Lingyin Temple. I guess people there took pictures of me and posted it online. After that there were people looking up, “What blessing does Lingyin Temple offer?” and the answer is “marriage”. The temple’s specialty is fortunes for marriage. So now my fans are thinking that I went to pray for marriage blessings. I guess that’s fine? LYN: But the reason is: 1. I just went to look, and 2. It’s almost time to start filming again. Actors like to pray at temples before the start- to ask that everything goes peacefully and smoothly. I just went to sightsee.

C: I want to see Dragon’s Roar. LYN: You came too late, I played it already. I won’t be singing it today because my voice is a little hoarse. I don’t think I can handle such a hard song. I played the video earlier. You can just watch it for entertainment.

----- break #2

LYN: I’m back. /shakes his hands to prove he washed them/ Are you satisfied now?? C: You’re trending at #37 on main now. LYN: Friends! How could I be trending on #37 on main?? I don’t believe it. How could I be worthy? C: 38. LYN: Really? It’s 38? See- I only just said a few words and dropped a rank!

LYN: Anyway, thank you. The only reason I am able to be trending is because of all of you in the stream. You upvote the “LYN Livestream” topic and open it for a wider audience. I'm thankful to you because it’s all due to your efforts. Thank you all for viewing. Today we’ll gift a bowl of malatang out. We’ll do an event today- we’ll randomly gift someone a bowl of malatang at the end of the stream. We’ll be like those market influencers and do a “3, 2, 1- screenshot.” Whoever’s first will win a bowl of malatang. I’ll buy takeout for you- if it’s within 20RMB. // Is 20 not enough? 30, then! C: I don’t believe it. LYN: That’s your choice. In any case- we’ll do it and it’s on you to contact my studio to collect your 30RMB bowl of malatang. C: Add a cup of milk tea, too. LYN: Your demands are too much.

C: Transfer me 50RMB. LYN: We’re raffling off money now?? Those of you who watch my stream have a chance to win a red envelope for up to 50RMB??

C: Ning-ge, I’m an international fan. I live overseas now. LYN: ? Is that so? What you mean is that if I order takeout for you, it would be difficult for you to receive it? XD You’re outside of the delivery area? Uh… You’re overthinking it. The problem is- out of so many people in the stream, how are you so confident you will be the winner? Let’s say that you are- can’t I just wire you 30RMB and call it a day?

- /comment asking about a variety show/ LYN: It’s… in the works. But for a lot of projects- for example I was supposed to have recording for a variety show in November. But they are no longer recording. Things just happen. The fact of it is I did not attend any filming, so now we just wait. If I go, great! If I don’t, then we just wait until we hear something. It’s unpredictable.

C: Can you gift a concert ticket to those watching your stream? LYN: Uh… that’s a little difficult. My fans all know that I am not the type to be hungry for wealth, right? I don’t do any business deals and I don’t do marketing- or if I have, only very little. So… my stream is also free, where the main focus is “keeping you company.”You can’t exect me to keep you company (for free) but ALSO expect to take something away from it. This type of “star-chasing” is a little TOO comfortable. LYN: Let’s say I do raffle a ticket. Which pricing tier should I give you? A front-row seat? Let’s say it’s worth 1680RMB. I think… that’s a little too generous. I tfeel like I’m losing in this deal. Let’s say I give you a row in the very back- worth 360-380RMB- the ones in the far back balcony. Then it will look like I’m stingy. So it’s not an easy thing to give. If front- my heart hurts. If back- it looks like I’m stingy. In that case, I won’t give it at all. I won’t offend anyone.

C: LYN, you’re trending. LYN: I know. My fans already told me. It’s not for anything terrible. It’s just the normal “LYN Livestream.” The normal ones don’t usually reach any high ranks. We want to stick to the principle of “good things don’t leave the house, but bad things are spread thousands of miles.” When I’ve had high ranking topics it was never for anything good. LYN: I really hope that one day I can be trending high in the ranks for a product or work that people really like. I’ll just keep working hard (until that day). LYN: Thanks again to everyone who is keeping me company in this stream tonight.

C: Being popular because people love to hate you is still being popular. LYN: I’ll… pass. I don’t want to be popular for that, because I’m already going through it. I’ve never won. From the moment I’ve debuted, I was already considered popular because people hate me. It’s not something I wanted for myself, rather something people made me popular for.

LYN: The path I’ve been on has always been the “people love to hate me” one; but it was never my intention. The first time it happened was when I was on “I Am a Singer”- boy, people loved to hate me, then. This happened four years ago and I remember it to this day. I remember I was trending at #2. “LYN Challenge Failed”- I remember clicking in and every comment was one cursing at me. Well- let’s not be so harsh- they were all very equitable, saying, “He’s just a viral singer, what right does he have to be on Singer?” “Who does he think he is?” “He’s not worthy.” etc. 80% of passersby were all saying I had no right to be on Singer, and that I only got there because my fans voted me in. LYN: Friends- here’s the problem. When the show was first starting I already received a call from the show, telling me to go to Changsha to audition. I passed. Then I figure that the production crew thought it would be strange for someone like me to be announced officially, so they found a different way to announce my participation. But in the end I wound up carrying that burden. LYN: But it’s better now. For the most part people won’t complain that I am not worthy to be a singer, anymore. It took me five years for that to happen, though. Now people are saying that I am not worthy to be an actor. I want to tell them to give me five more years. I’ll see if I can make it happen- just like I made you admit that I was a singer. I’ll work hard. That’s why, don’t blame me for streaming less. I’m trying to keep my momentum. Since I’ve chosen to go into acting, I want to do it well. I want to do well so that one day I can gain some accreditation.

C: When was the second time? LYN: What’s it to you?? I already told you the first, why would you ask about the second?? Are you rubbing salt in my wounds? Have you never heard of that song, “Don’t let yesterday pour salt into your wounds”? You’ve never heard it? ~ /sings/ ~ I’m already hurt, and you’re rubbing salt in my wounds. Get out of here! LYN: You’ve never heard it!? Do you not listen to songs?? I’ll find it for you. I can’t believe you’ve never heard of it! -- 别在伤口洒盐 (Don’t Sprinkle Salt on the Wound) LYN: Is there anything wrong with it? No! The focus is the expression “pouring salt in the wound”! I wasn’t tricking you this time. C: Ning-ge, I was born after the 00’s. LYN: What’s wrong with that- do you not listen to this song? Pay attention to the lyrics- // What’s wrong with it??

----- /Oldies Jukebox w/ LYN/

C: I just got in and it feels so old. LYN: ?! How old are you, tell me. What you’re telling me is this song is aged. What do you normally listen to?? You must only listen to the latest releases? You think this song is old??? C: 16 // 19 // 23 // 18. LYN: Do 18 years olds not listen to this song? You really haven’t? This song was really popular back in the day. I can’t believe you’ve never heard it. /shakes his head/ LYN: Maybe it’s because I’m a singer, so I’ve encountered more songs than you have. I used to sing in a bar, so I probably heard a lot more songs. You think this is old??? C: It sounds like something from my mom’s era. LYN: Then I’m probably about as old as your mom. // What year was this song released? I actually don’t know… You must have heard this one, though? -- 我可以抱你吗? LYN: This one came out around the same time. C: It feels even older. LYN: No way! Now I’m starting to doubt myself… When I was in the bar- Let me tell you, I can sing a number of old songs. - /starts running through songs trying to find an “old” one people recognize/

-- 驼铃 -- 江山无限 (LYN: Have you heard this one? If you haven’t, there’s no excuse.)

LYN: I can sing anything.

C: Journey to the West. LYN: Which version do you want? -- 通天大道宽又阔

-- 青城山下白素贞 C: You really must have come back from travelling to Hangzhou. [t/n: I guess these are the types of sings you’d hear there]

-- 新鸳鸯蝴蝶梦 LYN: I’ve seen people complimenting my singing lately, saying that I really have that sense of the “jianghu” when I sing. It’s because I grew up on these songs. These songs crafted my understanding of music. Do you get it? [t/n: I grew up on these songs, too! LYN: 1990, me: 1991.] -- 刀剑如梦

-- 你爱我像谁 (LYN: What about this one?) LYN: That’s about enough. Unless you want to hear? Then I’ll keep looking for old songs for you.

C: 江山. LYN: Which one is that? Oh, you’ve stumped me. There are very few old songs that I haven’t heard before. / I really haven’t heard this one before. But it does remind me of a different song. -- 大侠霍元甲 LYN: This song is great, isn’t it? C: You learned it just now. LYN: I’ve HEARD them, but never sang them before. I’ve heard them all, though.

LYN: The songs you’re requesting… C: This suits you so well. LYN: ?? Why does it suit me??? -- 梅花三弄 LYN: How do you figure this song suits me?

-- 逍遥游 -- 问情

LYN: Very few people- in my stream- have heard this song, huh? This is a very popular, very good song, though. But many of you- I asked earlier how old you were, and the 14 and 16 year-olds are already in a daze. C: I’ve heard it. LYN: I’m sure you have. But the 16-17 years olds are lost. LYN: When I was little I loved listening to OSTs. That’s why when I grew up I was able to become an OST singer. Everything has a reason, friends. The reason why I am a prolific OST singer now is because I liked to listen to OSTs when I was little. -- 追梦人 (Dream Chaser)

LYN: There’s an even older one. This one- friends, if you call your mother and father over to listen to this song, they would know it. -- 渴望

C: Play something I haven’t heard before. LYN: You’ve heard all of these? It’s very easy to play something you haven’t heard before- I’ll just play a Modern Brothers Liu Yuning song. I’m sure you’ve never heard it. Have you heard it? -- 狂風襲來 (Fierce Wind is Raging) [West Out of the Yumen OST] LYN: You haven’t, have you? / Hold on, let me grab a bottle of water. LYN: You haven’t heard it, huh? C: I’ve heard it 800 times already. LYN: My fans have definitely heard it.

C: Did you grab herbal medicine? LYN: /laughs/ Yes- I’m getting shanghuo.

----- LYN's Biggest Anti is Himself

C: 心太软. LYN: As soon as you said this title, I get the feeling you don’t pay attention to me very much. Em... you must not pay close attention to me.

- /plays the Our Song S1 version w/ Richie Ren/ LYN: Look at this- who’s that little fool on the side? Who does he look like? The fool. Look at this- he’s even nodding his head. // Look at how uncomfortable this looks- if you’re singing, then sing, Whya re you pretending to be sad. Just stop singing. // Now he’s pretending to be cute, even nodding his head! I can’t stand him!! Stop pretending you’re cute!! If you’re singing, then sing. What are you putting on an act for?? I can’t stand him. // Look at this kid- face full of oil. Did he not know to blot before he came on stage?! Oh my goodness… It’s like he ate 2kg of pork head-meat before coming on stage. Look at the reflection off the oil from his face. As an artist he has no sense of image-control. // His hair looks like it’s been licked by a donkey, what’s he doing?!? Oh my god. Oily face and greasy hair. /shakes his head/ // He’s singing “Are you tired?” and you’re over here pursing your lips and nodding, like “Yes.” Stop acting cute. It’s so off-putting. What’s it to you?!? This singer sure knows how to put on an act. // Okay, let’s stop watching. I can’t take any more. I get annoyed anytime I see LYN.

LYN: Let me tell you- if I ever get the chance to be an uploader that just makes fun of everyone, I’d be great at it. But right now I only make fun of LYN. If I try it with anyone else I’d be torn apart. I can only and only dare to make fun of LYN. I’m really accurate at seeing all the little tricks and intentions.

LYN: Let me find another stage for you. -- 烟花易冷 (Our Song ver. w/ Xiao Gui) LYN: Today we will be commenting on Singer LYN’s hair/makeup and outfit. // He looks a lot more energetic today. Visibly not as greasy. His hair and the shape looks pretty light. His clothes- I have to comment- why does he keep wearing such long clothes?? What’s he trying to do, fly? Paired with the slim-legged pants, it’s like a pair of chopsticks wrapped up in a napkin. Friends- take a look at his slim legged pants. Look at them- like a pair of chopsticks on the stage. // Let’s change the video- he (Xiao Gui) is too cool and I’m being overpowered.

LYN: Let’s see if there’s anything else we can comment on. Let’s take another look at this guy (LYN). What works does he have and what exactly has he been singing? What does he even do?? -- 女儿国 (Our Song S3 ver w. Shan Yichun) LYN: Tsk. Again, I can’t stand him. Why are you closing your eyes when singing, are you sleepy?? If you’re sleepy then go home and sleep. If you’re on stage, can’t you sing nicely for everybody? What are you closing your eyes for?? You’re pretending to be so enchanted with yourself?? What are you doing- just singing a song, right?? If you’re sleepy then just go home and sleep. I can’t stand this, I really can’t. Pretending to be so invested in the song… 🙄 Just sing it. What are you acting for?? It’s so insincere. C: He’s acting as Tang San(zang). It’s right for him to close his eyes. LYN: I can’t believe you’re making excuses for him (LYN)!! Let’s say this IS the Kingdom of Women and he’s Tang San (a monk)- so he should close his eyes- see nothing and ask nothing. // He doesn’t respect the stage at all. If he really wanted to act, then he should look the part. He should have shaved his head. Put a wig cap on. What’s he acting for?? That’s why it comes across as fake. LYN: I can’t take any more of this. Let’s just leave it at this.

C: Ning-ge, you shut up! LYN: I’m wearing these glasses, aren’t I? Let me just pretend to be an anti-fan. C: You can’t diss my idol. LYN: Okay, okay. I’m just playing. Don’t be so serious.

C: What are your comments on the Dragon’s Roar MV? LYN: Let’s not. For that song… LYN actually didn’t sing terribly. As a pure passerby, seeing that MV I thought: 1) LYN’s singing is not bad and the MV was also shot well. The whole production, editing, and everything was done very well. It’s something good. The Dragon’s Roar MV is not bad. I can’t find any point to nitpick. If we can’t find anything, then we switch a place. There’s always something we can comment on. But we never compliment the good things. C: Let’s see the MV again.

LYN: What’s there to see about it?? You can go watch it yourself. Maybe later when my drama airs I can watch an episode with you. Or maybe not, as there might be some copyright issues.

-----

C: Ning-ge, do you have a song called 别来无恙? LYN: You don’t need to cue me. There is a song called 别来无恙, and it’s one I really like. But there’s a problem- this song can only be listened to. I can’t really sing it. It’s SO hard to sing. When I was recording it, it made me nearly pass away. -- 别来无恙

LYN: Thank you. I never really dared to sing this song. Because when I was recording it I hard a hard enough time. But I can modestly say that I have improved myself since the time of recording. If you had me record the song again, I’m sure I can do much better than I did before.

C: LYN. Why does your hair look like your dog’s? LYN: You don’t think you’re complimenting me, do you? You don’t think that was very humorous and that I’d find you cute, do you?

LYN: Honestly, friends, let me share. I think one of the hardest songs I’ve ever sung was 别来无恙, but there’s one that’s even harder. It’s one that I have not dared to sing live ever since it was recorded. - /typing/ C: 琉璃 (Liu Li/Colored Glass). LYN: It’s not 琉璃. Actually, that song’s okay. LYN: Was it this one? Yes. It’s this one. This is the hardest song I’ve ever recorded. -- 造化 (Zao Hua/Destiny/Creating Change) [MDZS Donghua - Wei Wuxian Character Song] LYN: This song is the hardest- when I heard the demo I was dazed. This is one of the songs to date that I will never sing live. It’s not that I CAN’T sing it, I can do it if I force it, but I’m very likely to break. When you have time, you can listen to it carefully, with your headphones. The nuances would be a lot clearer that way.

LYN: ! Someone’s throwing money at me! C: One billion. Will you sing it? LYN: At this moment. You throw one billion to my face and ask me if I’ll sing this song or not? … I just want to ask- what are you trying to prove? Are you trying to prove that I am someone who does things that are purely profit-seeking, or… what? Tell me. If you REALLY gave me one billion to sing this song, I definitely would. There’s no one who wouldn’t accept that amount of money. You don’t even need one billion- if you transferred me one thousand right now, I would sing it. If you transferred me 200, I would sing a part for you right now. Okay? You don’t need one billion, 200 is enough. I can sing it for you acapella, too.

LYN: You want me to open my WeChat friend code? Then, scan me. C: Come on, I can do it. LYN: If I really put my QR code up, I’m sure that there would be a flood of people scanning it. But it would be a scam code that sucks all the money from your bank accounts. Friends. Can you grow a sense of awareness for scams? You have to be wary of these electronic scams! If you really scanned a scam code, it would take all the money from your bank card. How can you go around scanning random codes you see on the internet?? Don’t do it. C: I don’t have money in my card. LYN: Then what are you trying to scan me for?? XD No, what I mean is- weren’t you going to send me 200? I would only sing for you if you transferred me 200. Ifd you have no money, then why would you try to scan me at all?! C: Come on, I want to test your skills. Let’s see if you can really empty my account. LYN: Let me tell you- a lot of scammers target people exactly like you. People who think they would never be scammed, but also want to test the scammers.

-----

C: Ning-ge, my ID is “Melancholy Handsome Boy” (you yu de xiao shuai). Add me. LYN: A person’s ID can tell you a lot about them; you can examine what type of personality they are likely to have. “Melancholy Handsome Boy”... means that this person… let’s say something nice first. There’s a 70% chance this person is male. Let’s think about why they chose this name: first, this must be a man with a story. He’s “melancholy”, so I’m sure this is a quiet type of handsome guy. You must have heard of this person called “小帅 (Xiao Shuai)”, right? Have you ever scrolled across videos that say, “This man’s name is Xiao Shuai.” or “Watch carefully- this man known as “Xiao Shuai”...” This is exactly who we’re talking about. You will always hear about him in other people’s stories. “Melancholy Handsome Boy”- it’s him. This must be a reflective, quiet handsome young man with a story. It must be him. LYN: /flips/ Honestly, though. I’m so old that I can tell what type of person this is just by their name. “Melancholy Handsome Boy”?? You must be pretending to be melancholy. Let me tell you- this type of person doesn’t have a sense of self. Due to this, they would want to explicitly tell people- “Look. I am very melancholy. Look at me.” But actually they are a very chaotic person, who doesn’t have many thoughts. Really. If you call yourself “melancholy”, that mean that you aren’t at all. People love to emphasize what they lack, hence the “xiao shuai.” They know they look just average, so they call themselves “handsome.” I’m sure they don’t look all that handsome at all. If you were very confident in your looks, you’d call yourself “Melancholy Big Handsome Guy”. But by calling yourself “Melancholy Handsome Boyi”, it means that they are only a little bit (xiao) handsome (shuai). [t/n: this is a pun. semantics.] Therefore, I won’t be adding you as a friend, okay? LYN: Friend, don’t be angry. I’ve said the good and the bad. I’m not saying I know which kind you are, but I have a feeling you are the former.

C: Ning-ge, I’m called “Da Mei (Big Beautiful)”. LYN: Da Mei is very good. It sounds appropriate. You can call yourself whatever you want, you don’t need to tell me! It’s not as if I am here collecting 3-5RMB to tell a fortune based off your internet ID. There are people like that- you can create an ID and they will calculate for you whether the name is fortuitous or not, and what fates it can bring to you. There are people like that! It’s not a job I can take on. C: Sounds like you have a lot of experience. LYN: I don’t have experience. LYN: A long time ago- many, many years ago- when I was 15 or 16, my web ID was “Bing Ruo Han”. Friends. The “bing” as in “refrigerator” (冰 = ice). “Ruo” as in “as/seem” (若). “Han” as in “frigid cold” (寒). That was my web name (= cold as ice). Wasn’t it non-mainstream? I’m sure that all the girls back then would see my name and be charmed by me. Was that not a good name? LYN: !! Not the “ruo” as in “weak”!! (弱) C: Ning-ge, if you’re “bing ruo han” (冰若寒), then I am “ai ru huo” (爱如火/Love Like Fire). LYN: Wow, we have couple names. That’s amazing. LYN: Another thing people liked to do was use “mu rong X X” and “shang guan X X”. I don’t know if I’ve called out anyone in my stream? Did you like to use that naming convention when you were younger? Or, “ou yang X X.” - [t/n: more examples of names, but they’re difficult to translate :p] - [t/n: some Northeastern slang, which is even more difficult to translate than the names are. Something about the metal part of a hoe. Farming tools, idk.]

LYN: /laughs/ Do we ever talk about anything normal in my stream? We’re talking nonsense, now. Do you like it better when I have a point and discussion to make, or when I am just blindly chatting? Could you tell me which type of content you prefer? Which style do you like, and in the future I will try to develop more in that direction. C: Either is good. // It’s all good. LYN: If it’s my fans I’m sure the answer is “Anything, as long as you stream more often.” (Putting words into his fans’ mouth:) “Don’t say anything, Ning-ge. As long as you stream, we like it. As long as you are here. Don’t say anything. Just turn the camera on like a security cam, and we would be satisfied.” C: I like it when you sing. LYN: Okay. If there are so many people who like it when I sing, then you have to remember to buy my concert tickets in 2024.

----------- Album/Concert Talk

C: Your album..? LYN: I recently went back to Beijing and… recorded another (1) song! It’s sounds very nice. I like it. The songs on my album this time around- I have no pursuits. I don’t care about any particular musical concept, or how well it is produced, or- no, that’s not what I meant- I only mean that I care for two things: 1. the song sounds good, and 2. I like it. That’s it. There’s nothing fancy. I just have to think they sound good, and like them myself.

LYN: Fall in Love was supposed to be the first track of this album to be released. But we couldn’t keep up with the release of the rest of the songs. So then we decided Fall in Love would be a single instead. The overall feeling of the album should be like Fall in Love, though. Something that makes you happy and comfortable. Something that makes you relax. C: Ning-ge, it’s your own investment, so whatever you say goes.

LYN: That’s true, but my albums are provided to you at no cost, after all. I might release some vinyls, but that’s not definite. You know I released vinyls, right? Its not to make profit, though. C: Are there student discounts for your concert? LYN: �� … You might now understand concerts very well. There is always a collaborating party. Usually- and I don’t know how other people work, but this is how I work- I don’t have a lot of say in it, actually. Its not as if it were my restaurant, and I told you that you could have a meal on me. Even though it’s my concert, I don’t have a say. I am only the performer. If it were my restaurant, I could let you eat there for free. But for the concert, I have no say in whether there will be student discounts or not. There are industry rules for pricing. But the 5RMB discount coupon still counts. Of course, there is no way the system will let you apply the coupon at the time of purchase. So you will have to buy the ticket at full price first. Then, at the concert I will have staff at the doors checking for coupons and they will transfer you the 5RMB. Either that or I’ll go to the bank and ask them for 5RMB bills and then just give you a bill as you go.

LYN: There have been many people holding concerts lately. Rather, the whole year. All singers have pretty much held a concert this year. But I haven’t because 1. My album isn’t complete yet, 2. all my time is tied up in dramas, and 3. I want to be rebellious. I don’t want to hold mine when everyone else is holding theirs. I’d rather hold mine stably next year.

C: Can you go overseas? LYN: To me, I don’t believ I’e reached the levels of other very amazing singers. For my concerts, the large majority- 70%- is my fans. The other 30% is people who’ve watched my drama, heard my songs, or people who have time to kill on the weekend and want to watch a concert. Even if I do hold one overseas, I don’t think it would have much meaning. Because my market has not crossed the seas yet. My music is not yet international. The only thing holding a concert overseas would do is make my local fans buy a flight ticket and go overseas to watch me. What’s the meaning in that? I’d rather they save some money to reserve a better hotel room here and watch me in concert.

C: You have a lot of fans overseas, though. LYN: Don’t trick me. I know myself- I know that I don’t have very many overseas fans. I HAVE them, sure. But not many. I don’t think you all would fill up a whole concert venue, would you? I’m sure that all my overseas fans together would not fill up a venue. I can’t think too highly of myself, and say that I’m “international.” It’s easy to subscribe to my weibo, but as for the number of people who would actually come out to watch me in concert, that’s about 1 in 100. Let’s say I have 10k fans. 1% of them- so only 1k fans. That’s about enough. Really- the people who would willing spend money to watch a concert is only about 1%. So.. I’m not thinking about that right now.

LYN: Acting and Singing go hand-in-hand, so I’ll wait until my drama airs first. Then I’ll have a better time selling my concert tickets. Right? Doesn’t it make sense? There’s nothing wrong with the logic. I’ll wait until my dramas air, and then I’ll have an easier time selling tickets. Nowadays when dramas are super popular and they do a post-airing fan-meeting, the tickets always sell out, don’t they? If a bunch of actors can sell out a fanmeet/concert, then that goes to show if my drama does well then people would buy tickets to my concert. I’ve thought it through: I should film more dramas so that my concert tickets sell well. C: I’m afraid I won’t be able to get a ticket. LYN: Please do not have the misconception that I am very popular. You will definitely get a ticket, trust me. Because if I hold a concert tour next year, there will be 2,000 stops. You tell me if you’ll be able to get a ticket or not. 6am, 12pm, 8pm, 12am, 3am. I’ll do five in a day, all year. 2,000 concerts. There are 365 days in a year, with 5 showings a day… 1825 showings. That’s enough. C: You’re not going to sleep? LYN: /laughs/

LYN: Anyways, I’m sure you’ll get one. Don’t make it seem as if my tickets are hard to come by. Don’t let me have that misconception, otherwise I’ll just keep adding showings.

LYN: I was planning on 10 stops for next year. Any more than that is unnecessary. C: Which 10? LYN: The main cities, mostly. Shanghai, Beijing, Guangzhou, Chengdu, Chongqing, Wuhan, Xi’an, Dalian- the big places. C: Shenzhen. LYN: If I hold one in Shenzhen, then the people in Guangzhou can come to it, too. Likewise if I hold one in Guangzhou, the friends in Shenzhen can attend it. Depends on distance. C: Qingdao. LYN: It’s not impossible, Qingdao would be okay. It doesn’t matter where I go, the more important thing is whether the venue is available and aligns with my timing or not. For example, if I want to reserve Shanghai, but they’re booked for the month, or next three months. Then, I can’t go there. It’s that simple. There’s no predicting this, so you can stop trying to guess. C: Can you do two showings in Wuhan? LYN: It’s possible. But the first stop is probably not going to be Wuhan. Many of my friends are very good, and the thing that touches me is that at the time- three years ago- I held my first concert tour. The start of the pandemic was right around when I was supposed to go to Wuhan. The tickets were all already sold. To this day many of you have not returned those tickets. I’ve even told you, you can return them. But you’ve told me that you don’t want to return them, that you’re afraid you won’t be able to buy another one later. So- it’s been four years- So this time I will definitely make that stop up to you. There’s no way I would just take your money for that showing and not sing anything for you. I will definitely make it up to you. I’ll make it up to you, but the first stop is not likely to be Wuhan. Don’t worry, though. I will return that stop to you.

LYN: We’ll continue on, slow and steady today and tomorrow I’ll hold my concert. It’s a must, as a singer. I’ll pretty much be a fan-meeting. It’s been so long since I had a concert. It’ll be good to hold one again.

C: Lao-da, it’s too far. I won’t ve able to go. LYN: Find a stop closer to you. I’ll be all around the country. Just find a closer stop to attend. LYN: I get worked up just thinking about the concert… /sigh/

C: Ning-ge, when are you going to advise the neighbors to stop fighting. LYN: I already did. They made up. LYN: How long have I been streaming for? I think I started at 7:40p… right now it’s /calculating/… I’ve been streaming for almost four hours?? Then… I’ll stream until 10p. LYN: Let me play you a video while I use the restroom. Wait for me.

--- break #3 C: I can recite that whole video now. LYN: Amazing. I also want to thank everyone who has been editing these videos for me.

C: When do we get the malatang?! LYN: You can’t eat something different, like xiao long bao or??? Maybe some porridge? Is that not okay? I can’t believe you still remember. I thought I was going to be able to save 30 RMB. C: I want to eat jumbo shrimp! LYN: Keep dreaming! LYN: How about we do this… let’s not give any prizes today. I don’t have any spare change. In the next stream I’ll pick two winners- I’ll be nice. I don’t have any spare change today. I’ll save up. C: If you don’t want to give us takeout, then you can give an autograph too. LYN: /laughs/ Artists’ autographs are all really hard to get. But here you want to replace a 30RMB order of xiao long bao for one of mine?! Oh my goodness~ Is that how it is?? My autograph is only worth 30RMB- two baskets of xiao long bao??? One bowl of rice noodles? /sigh/ - C: Ning-ge, you said you don’t have change right? I do. I can break it for you. LYN: Do you mean to say that I hand you 100RMB, and you give me back 70? - C: Ning-ge, if it’s a personalized autograph, you can add 50 cents. LYN: Hold that thought. I think we should forget about the autograph. I really don’t think my autograph is worth very much. I’m not some big celebrity or anything, whose autograph is very valuable. I just don’t want to.. overflow the market? Because sometimes when a drama airs or I have collaborations or I go on a variety show, they’ll make me sign a set of photos, to help with promotions. If fans are able to attain them in that way, there is more of a sense of interaction/participation. That’s why I personally won’t just give out autographs. They’re better saved for events, so that fans can have a sense of collecting for completionism's sake.

----- Daimi Time!

C: Ning-ge, could I have Daimi’s autograph? LYN: Wh- You want me to prepare a bunch of photos of Daimi, then grab her paw and stamp it on there? Take an inkpad, and press her paw into it, then stamp it on the photo?

LYN: Daimi’s probably sleeping. Do you want to see her? I can just call her over. LYN: Daimi, come here. Some friends want to see you. Come here, quick. No need to be shy. Your fans want to see you. LYN: She hasn’t had a bath lately, but she still looks like this. Kind of silly.

C: The two of you match in color so well. LYN: :) - /Daimi tries to move/ LYN: Hm? Sit a while, sit. Accompany your ge a little as he streams.

C: Have Daimi sing us a song. LYN: Sing something. - /moves the mic to her level/ LYN: Sing. Come on. If you bark, it’d be okay too. Bark! - /messes with her to try to get her to make a sound. she does not./ LYN: My dog really doesn’t have any special talents.

LYN: … I’m going to say my spell now… Watch carefully now, friends. See how her whole mood changes. LYN: Want… a… sausage? /chants/ You want one? Want one? - /gets excited, so she gets excited in turn/ LYN: You want one or not? - /now she’s impatient/ LYN: I’ll give you one in a bit. Hold on! Okay, okay! I’ll give you one. LYN: You can go now. I’ll give you one after the stream.

C: She wouldn’t bite you, would she? LYN: No.

- /looks down at her/ LYN: Wait! LYN: … She’s already had four sticks today. I give her dog food, but she doesn’t really eat it. So I give her the sausages… but that’s why she’s fat.

-----

LYN: It’s about time. If you have not yet subscribed to my weibo, please do so. I am Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. Thanks for keeping me company tonight. I just want to say again- the drama Wonderland of Love is currently airing. I’ve watched it, and really think it’s a good watch. So, if you want to watch a drama you can check it out. It’s not bad. In the first episode, there are some fight scenes which were shot prettily. You can go support the drama. C: I don’t have membership. LYN: ?? Watch if you want to. I’m only here to promote the drama, but you can watch it if you want. What do you mean by telling me you don’t have a membership? You want me to buy a membership for you? If that’s what you meant, then I think you can… watch if you want. (It’s not my problem.) It’s not a drama I acted in, anyway. I’m only recommending it, but if you want me to pay money into it then there’s no way. C: You cameo’d. LYN: I did cameo, but the problem is… I wasn’t paid for it. XD LYN: I can’t just pay for your membership. It’s not worth it. Friends. (Spare me.) Thank you. I beg you. // I cameo’d for three scenes. I said it earlier- about eight minutes worth. - /thinking about it…/ LYN: Wait- I only acted in three scenes, for about eight minutes total. You don’t think anyone would think I added scenes for myself because of this, do you? Do you think they would? Now I’m worried. I afraid and don’t want people to think I accept roles in dramas then find a way to add scenes for myself. I was originally supposed to cameo for one scene, but I ended up having three. I… got added scenes. LYN: I don’t think it was three scenes. Let me think! Four scenes! If I remember correctly, it should be four scenes. Not more than five. C: Eight minutes turned into eighteen. LYN: Honestly, I don’t know about that. It’s only four- it should only be four scenes. I still remember the lines… but I’ll reenact them for you if I get the chance to later.

LYN: I’ll log off when I hit 4000. We’ll play a starting contest; the tortoise stares at the mung bean. For the next five minutes, we won’t say anything, just stare at each other like this. /stares into the camera/ The last time I used this expression, someone replied, “I choose the mung bean.” Why do you have to be so sensitive about all these online rumors? Why do you care so much?? If you can’t even take that expression, then let me tell you, there’s no way you can be a celebrity. You wouldn’t be able to handle all the pressure that comes from online talk about you. You’d have a breakdown. You can’t be an artist. You have to be able to bear it. Do you understand? LYN: Also, I say that “A tortoise stares at a mung bean, and it suits the eye.” Do you think that’s a good expression? By “mung bean” I mean “mung bean fly.” [t/n: ?? I don’t really get it.] It’s not the simple mung bean- the one in the popsicles- that we’re talking about. The way I understand this expression, it’s meant to refer to the mung bean fly. It’s just an expression, not a literal description.

----- Welcome to Bikini Bottom🍍

C: Liu-ge! Do you know… is Patrick Star in Spongebob a man or a woman? LYN: People who call me “Liu-ge” are generally not my fans. If you’re in my stream and calling me “Liu-ge”, then you’re likely not my fan. My fans call me “Xiao Ning” or “Ning-ge”. If you call me “Liu-ge” you are likely distant from me. They asked me a question: “Liu-ge. Is Patrick Star in Spongebob a man or a woman?” LYN: … LYN: Em… I don’t think I could keep up if we want to discuss the genetics of marine life. But, even if we want to start from a viewers perspective, all things have a model for basis. Do you get what I’m trying to say? A novel is a novel, a manhwa is a manhwa, but after being converted to video format there are bound to be changes. You should understand that concept by now, after watching so many drama adaptations. You don’t need to think about whether Patrick is male or female- it really doesn’t matter. However, in the animation, we can see that they are male-presenting. Because Patrick only wears shorts. If the character were female, there’s no way it would appear just wearing shorts in the animation. Patrick would be like Sandy- with her helmet and bikini. The original thing is one thing, the animation is another. Do you get it?

C: Is Spongebob male or female? LYN: Spongebob!? First of all, let’s not think about whether a sea sponge is male or female. In the animation, they must be male because when they go to the beach to play, they only wear shorts. You can tell from what they’re wearing! What does he wear when he goes to Bikini Bottom to swim? If it’s a bikini, then they’re female. If they’re wearing shorts, then they’re male.

C: What about Squidward? LYN: /laughs/ Why are we discussing this? He must be a male because he’s called “Squid-BRO” (章鱼哥)! [t/n: technically a zhang yu is an octopus though…] He’s not called “Squid-SIS”! He’s called “ge”, so he must be a male! What logic are you operating on??

C: What about Mr. Krabs? [“crab-boss” in chinese] LYN: Mr. Krabs has to be male, because his daughter calls him “Dad”! He has a daughter, and she calls him “dad”, so he must be male. It’s not like she calls him “Mom.” You- LYN: Friends, if you can’t even understand Spongebob, then all these dramas must be a challenge for you. You can’t even tell male and female apart?? C: If Mr. Krabs is a male, then is his daughter male or female? LYN: /laughs/ LYN: How about this- I’ll set up a sign in my stream. One that reads, people with an IQ below 30 may not enter. This place doesn’t suit you. We discuss high-education topics here. We’re talking bout biology. We even have to distinguish if living characters in an animation are male or female. Is Mr. Krabs’ daughter male or female? How about you stand in front of an elementary school tomorrow and stop the kids as they pass by. Stop them on their way out of school and say, “Hey. Let me ask you a question. If you answer right, I’ll give you a candy.” Ask them, “Is Mr. Krabs’ daughter male or female?” Let me tell you- if this kid is five years old you’re going to confuse them. If they’re seven, they won’t be able to come up with an answer…. As if!

C: What about Plankton? LYN: Let’s not worry about whether plankton have gender. Look at this- as an actor, I’m already starting to interpret character profiles. I don’t know if a plankton has gender, but in the animation, Plankton is male. Why? Even though he doesn’t wear any shorts- doesn’t wear any clothes, for that matter- we have to understand this character through its relation with other characters. His voice is very thick and rough; it sounds manly, so we will lean towards male. Secondly, he has a wife, who is a computer. From these two points, Plankton is likely a male. No arguments there, right? C: Is Plankton’s wife male or female? LYN: Now you’ve hit the nail on the head. Plankton’s wife is a computer. Computers count as AI. If you want it to be male, it can be. If you want it to be female, it can. That’s your own choice. It depends on what type of voice you give it, I suppose. Let’s not touch AI and computing topics, though. Truthfully, I did not learn computer science in high school. In high school I was learning how to be a cook. Computer Science is a different discipline. You can find someone who studies it and ask them if Plankton’s wife is male or female.

C: What did I walk in on. I don’t understand what you’re talking about. LYN: It’s not important. The last twenty minutes or so was just complete nonsense. It doesn’t make a difference in your life whether you heard the last twenty minutes or not. In the four hours that I’ve streamed, most of it is nonsense. You’re listening, but you’re also not. These four hours have just served to help you pass the time.

C: What about Gary? (In Chinese, the character is called “Xiao Wuo” for “Little Snail”) LYN: The snail? Gary SHOULD BE male. Why? Because if I am remembering correctly, there was an episode where he had a crush on a girl snail. I don’t remember if there was an episode like that? I think there was, but I could have also imagined it just now. I remember there was an episode, he saw a girl snail and was really happy about it. I think that’s what happened.

C: Why is Mr. Krabs’ daughter a whale? LYN: … I don’t know. I don’t watch every episode. I don’t know the canon, but it could be- the way I see it, since it is an animation after all- from a certain perspective, they would have to promote kindness. It could be- this is what I think- she was adopted. Or he, designated her as his daughter. There might be some terrible backstory of the elimination of marine life. Do you get what I’m saying? Maybe her parents were killed by humans and then Pearl was adopted by Mr. Krabs. Even though he’s greedy for money, he is still someone with a lot of love. At least, that’s what I think. When you watch dramas, you can’t only see what’s on the surface. Why is he a crab, and she a whale? You have to think about what they’re trying to teach you through the story behind the characters. The thing Spongebob is trying to tell you is that if there are no business transactions (for greed), then there is no hurt/harm. That’s the moral they took many episodes to tell us.

C: I want to eat crab now… LYN: Okay, later I’ll probably order some.. Krabby patties. /laughs at himself/ Krabby patties, plus two bullfrogs. [t/n: ???]

C: Ning-ge, what’s the Krabby Patty secret? LYN: The secret is.. HOW WOULD I KNOW??? Quit with your nonsense.

-----

LYN: There are people advertising for me. “Welcome to LYN’s livestream. If you’re here, you can subscribe.” You can subscribe to my weibo, if you want. I’m Modern Brothers Liu Yuning. When I have time to stream, you can come watch. It’s not shameful to follow me. You can watch for entertainment. Let me play a song. It’s about time. LYN: Thank you for all of your company and support today. It’s because of you that I was able to get a trending topic, so I’m happy about that. I see that many of you are watching my stream for the first time- I’m sure that you think I’m not quite sane, but this is how I usually am. I just hope that if you come in, you can stay until the end. Thanks to those of you who were here from the start of the stream and have stayed these four hours until the end. I’m happy that you stayed. Thank you.

C: Ning-ge, please say, “Goodnight Princess.” LYN: /laughs/ … /sighs/ LYN: Out of bounds. LYN: Rest early.

LYN: I hope you had a wonderful and relaxing night. It was great to have you and I hope you enjoyed yourself. I’ll see you again in the next stream. Goodnight everyone.

#Liu Yuning #lyn livestream #(4:09:58)#topics:#drama promo time #some singing segments #lyn's biggest anti is himself #the hardest song ge's ever sung & why he'll never sing it live #album/concert talk #spongebob gender discourse #(how did we get here?)

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bestworstcase · 1 year ago

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I feel like (different anon) half of the fandom doesn’t even care about Salem in the sense that regardless of what Her goal is? To be fair in my corner I’ve seen more individual character hatred rather than “this plot doesn’t make sense” hatred. Or ppl just saying the plot sucks without offering why they think so which is the majority of rwby “criticism”. But Salem being the key to the end of the show has been very well telegraphed since the end of volume 3. She started as this faceless monster, a creature to hate, the one who killed their headmaster and plunged the world into war. Then we learned that Oz was also keeping secrets and outright lying, so that knocked him off of the Trusted Adult pedestal (tho he has always been kinda shady but in terms of story formula that’s what I mean). Volume 6??? The Lost Fable?? Still so amazing. Salem very literally gets humanized in the eyes of our characters. She still did all of those awful things but she’s a Person now rather than an Entity. Those moments of confrontation (Ironwood’s office with Ruby, Yang while in the whale, Oscar.” We get to see her talking to her Evil Guy Crew. We see her have emotions.

AND THEN THE BROTHER GODS once thought of as entities much like how Salem was seen by the cast in the beginning. Yes they are still gods but not in the sense that at least I was thinking. They came From somewhere. And yes Salem was the first to discover they were fallible but knowing what V9 told us helped me put it into perspective

So the last arch being about fully learning what Salem wants and then, probably possibly, deciding how to help alongside with it. I think ppl get upset bc they view that as “oh yeah all the ppl she killed and lives she ruined don’t matter she’s our bestie mow” kind of Joining with Salem. When im seeing it as a more Neo agreeing to work with Cinder type deal. If Salem wants to stop the gods, get revenge, make them humble, and the gods return and want to wipe out remnant For Good, I’d say that’s a common goal our kids can get behind.

rwby is a cool show with cool villains and I enjoy it a lot and also your thoughts about it sorry this is so long

the thing with salem and the, like, common fandom interpretation of her and where her arc is headed is that. at least since v9 it’s less about resistance to the idea that the final confrontation being team rwby vs the gods as it is the way folks assume salem fits into that, namely that most of the fandom still takes completely at face value the idea that she’s selfish, arrogant, and needs to learn her lesson about the value of life and death. so you get these wild takes that the gods were assholes who punished her out of proportion for what she did, paired with this implicit idea that salem does actually deserve this punishment because she Still RefusesTo Learn Her Lesson, and thus she needs to be redeemed by team rwby proving her wrong somehow.

but like

salem did nothing wrong. praying to the gods was not wrong, reacting emotionally when they were cruel to her was not wrong, recognizing their fallibility and unworthiness was not wrong, rallying people against them was not wrong, vowing to keep fighting after they massacred everybody was not wrong, cursing them after they left and blaming them for ending the world was not wrong, jumping into the pool of grimm was not wrong, BEING grimm is not wrong, rejecting the divine mandate after ozma hid it from her for years was not wrong. frankly continuing to be a thorn in his side since then is, i would argue, also not wrong, because she’s made herself the immovable obstacle preventing him from summoning his genocidal god back to remnant to kill everyone again; it is laughably obvious that the ultimatum is not a game humanity can win. and then factoring in the part where ozma is obsessed with finding a way to destroy her, what else is she supposed to do besides live in exile. and of course if you close off every other door except violent rebellion you are eventually going to invite violent rebellion.

so like. Salem Is Right, and seems to be taking what she considers the path of minimal destruction (the grimm held beacon but pull out of vale within a few days; her plan for haven was nearly bloodless and left mistral untouched; she made no move to attack mantle and began her siege with a grace period for her to leave in peace if the relics were surrendered), which means that she’s likely willing to negotiate methods if other less destructive paths are opened to her. her villain -> hero arc can’t turn on team rwby persuading her that she’s wrong, because fundamentally her position is “the genocidal divine tyrants do not deserve our obedience and we can and must defy them” which is, um, correct. but if they adopt that position themselves and then negotiate How i think they’ll find she’s a lot more reasonable than they’ve been led to believe, and i do not think the wider fandom is prepared for that whatsoever

#50/50 the first olive branch comes from salem’s side #which would be hysterical

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littlerosetrove · 6 months ago

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so i saw your posts about the daddy issues convo and you are right about that specific post being so not okay. but i feel like i’m not seeing the emotional depth that everybody else is seeing, like the joke itself fell kinda flat to me? (not saying tommy is a terrible person for a sexy joke!!) but it feels like the whole thing is being so blown out of proportion by everyone. i guess for me it was the convo itself that felt off, not just the joke at the end? i hope that makes sense?

I definitely recommend reading this post by @tenebrous-academic because it lays out why there is depth to the scene. It explains how, in short, the scene displays a level of equality between Buck and Tommy that we've never really seen with/in Buck's previous relationships.

I think there are two fronts of how the scene became blown out of proportion, because the scene was truly just a nice scene of boyfriends connecting with each other and flirting. It didn't need to be A Thing, and yet... So. 1) People who already dislike (or straight up hate) Tommy and Buck/Tommy tearing the scene apart to try and show, essentially, why Tommy is not good for Buck. Or "this is why they won't last." (i assume you've seen this stuff on your dash, nonny?) 2) Although this wasn't the only nasty post, but one person in particular taking it much further to "jokingly" say that Tommy flirting, with a sexual joke with his adult boyfriend, was so horrible that Tommy, a gay man, should be shot. Things took a nasty turn and that's why a simple scene of Buck and Tommy connecting feels "blown out of proportion." I'll say it over and over that people don't have to like or vibe with a character or a ship, but some take their dislike so far that they think it's okay - even with a fictional character - to say they'd shoot a gay man. Some people are trying to vilify a character so much because, as far as I can tell, they hate that Buck is with a man that is not Eddie.

Now, it's fine if the joke didn't work for you, for whatever reason. You don't seem to have an issue with the fact that it was a sensual joke in nature, so that's good. Two queer men being openly queer with each other should not be an issue.

While I liked the date scene, I can understand why the tone of it felt off to some people. I think it comes from the fact that the entire episode was so fast paced, nothing was really allowed to breathe, certain stories did not get the time they deserved (like Bobby being in the hospital, but instead we got Athena doing dirty cop stuff etc), and mix that all together? We have ourselves just a weird, predictable, and in some ways unsatisfying episode.

While I don't think storylines being predictable is inherently a bad thing, and 911 has done plenty of predictable stories. However, 911 is fully capable of telling satisfying "predictable" stories, and telling satisfying character stories. We just didn't quite get that in 7x10, in part because of some lack of buildup and setup for some stories and characters. Also a lack of payoff for some stories. Some things were ignored, brushed aside, or minimized when they shouldn't have been.

#911 spoilers #9-1-1 #Nonny asks #replies

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brazenautomaton · 6 months ago

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I'd like you to type up your idea about the star wars hotel.

okay so basically it has to be a hotel containing an experience, not an immersive experience confined to a hotel. the story has to be a value-add. unfortunately the app is going to be important.

there needs to be a star wars story happening -- multiple stories! -- but you're not the star. you're IN a star wars story, not creating it. the hotel is primarily a star wars cruise ship themed hotel that has some additional star wars activities you can do in the day, like the asteroid field or the lightsaber training (and I'll be real with you the way the lightsaber training apparently worked was legit genius, in round 3 aiming the lasers at your lightsaber so it feels like you're predicting them)

but your whole day isn't scheduled. it is assumed you go to the parks for most of the day. the cruise ship of course will stop at a different "port of call" every day, with a "docking bay" for shuttle service to different "planets" aka the different parks. you have different uniforms and signage for the people in the shuttle service every day, nothing extensive, just make it look like "oh, this is a different port we landed at." so you can go to other parks besides galaxy's edge. the magic kingdom is obviously a lush luxury planet. the world of pandora is, you know, that. ah, typhoon lagoon, you mean Typh Lagos IV? I hear the climate is like Kamino, but much more temperate!

but you hide little bits of star warsy things in each park, kind of like the Kim Possible event she described. we'll get back to that. you don't have all the guests' time scheduled, but you DO want them back earlier than most, because you still have events going on, story-related or not. you have the dinner theater with the star wars singers and so on. plot events happen in the afternoon and evening.

the exception to this is you set aside exactly two days of the week to be plot days where guests are expected to be on the ship all day. you set these on Saturday (most crowded day, keeps one hotel of guests out of the park) and Wednesday (least crowded day, encourages people to come in midweek to visit on Tuesday and Thursday when you normally have less customers). The length of stay isn't the same fixed duration for everyone, instead, you have a set of storylines that run for seven days but don't all pay off at the same time.

You need more stories with less cast involvement. Basically, you can't do the thing where you act like each group of guests is a different timeline where they're doing the things. It's one set of events everyone is around for. There's not multiple Chewie escapes per day that can misalign, there's one Chewie escape on this one day.

The audience participation has a bigger proportion come from cooperating with each other. That thing where everybody got the notes at dinner and Jenny thought they'd have to work together to figure them out -- actually do that, because the time they're doing that is time they're doing a star wars experience but you aren't having to pay a cast member to run it. you take the idea of the scanning cargo and do something with it, make it a bunch of scavenger hunts to do star wars things. if you're going to Typh Lagos IV, the resistance contact needs you to meet a few people on that planet and check in. hey, these people are situated all around the major attractions in the park so you'll travel to all of them! they're normal employees of typhoon lagoon doing employee things, but they have little scripts or instructions about how to interact with guests where they're secretly star wars guys with star wars things! doing all that cargo scanning isn't just for the sake of scanning, the smuggler wants someone to tag the boxes that have spice in them so his guy can pick them up later. now it's a mission! it's a mission where you get rewarded kind of like the Kim Possible thing, little souvenirs or tchotchkes left by the maid service with a little "thanks for the job well done ;-)" message!

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rangespacer · 1 year ago

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i've been picking away at this meta for days now, wondering why i couldn't seem to write, and i think it boils down to me blowing it way out of proportion in my mind. i don't usually participate in events, so i was making it out to be this whole Thing that had to be polished and coherent, when that's not how i operate and is also frankly not in the spirit of blosc. and so, instead, for @warpolomewdarkmatter 's blosctober, i present my stream-of-consciousness rambling.

on sadness, and grieving something that's still alive, and having to pick up the pieces of your life and reevaluate who you are. on having your foundations rocked in your thirties, and still being able to find something new. on infinite potential, and how things might come back around, with a bit of patience and understanding, though never in the same way. on sitting with loss. on new beginnings.

i'll open this by saying that blosc is a piece of media for children. sometimes it teaches kids about right and wrong but mostly it's for entertainment. like the ratio isn't even in education's favour it's majority whacky shit, and must a cartoon be educational all the time to be fun? i didn't think so, and i still don't. blosc also spawns from a franchise that used to be well known for being something that both children and adults can enjoy, with parts of the content specifically geared towards adults. while i don't think the themes i read into blosc now were ever intended to be there, i'm enjoying returning to it as an adult and seeing how i can apply what i've learned in the last two decades to it, and what it gives me in return. my general approach to media is that as long as it makes sense with what's presented in the piece, you're good. even if it contradicts someone else's reading. even if it contradicts your own! and right now, meeting it halfway from where i'm at, i'm thinking about how life goes on after a change that feels like it should be the end of the world, and coming to terms with the fact that you're going to have to keep grieving and growing for the rest of your life and it will feel fresh, every time, but will also bring joy.

what i was trying to get at in my meta, in far too many words, is how the series is bookended (maybe not perfectly, depending on how you order the episodes, but generally) by buzz losing warp, and by the two of them reaching, at the very least, a cordial acceptance of the way things are. i read more into that, i'm sure a lot of people on here do, but i'm going to keep my language neutral because i really want to dig at what the show is presenting us, factually. that said buzz and warps' romance is real to me, so sorry for the divorce and congrats on maybe getting remarried. regardless of how you read it, this is indisputable: blosc opens ( or is prequeled -- prequeled? preceded? prequeled, i'll mint that ) by establishing what buzz's life has been for the past two decades, then tearing it apart. he has, to the best of our knowledge, been partnered with warp since they were in the academy. we see how well they work together, communicating without words, enjoying each other's presence, relying wholly on one another.

this is key to me, because the show will go on to establish buzz as being fully capable of working independently, especially in episodes like lone ranger, haunted moon, and shiv katall. and i do think he's always been like this. it was the writer's intention that buzz be the most static, the most 'perfect', the ideal towards which everybody else was striving ( or the thing to destroy, and i have so, so much to say about how buzz represents star command to a detrimental degree to both himself and the alliance, but that's another post ); simultaneously, they go out of their way to show that buzz is not perfect. he has flaws, he's egotistical, prideful, at times even unreliable in some very specific, very interesting ways that we'll get back to. but i say all this because i often think about what it must have been like for buzz to have lived twenty years with warp, what deficits warp was covering, how intimately they must have known one another, and how his presence could have been taken for granted. this is some extrapolation on my part, though we do see them to continue to work well together over the course of the series, and one of zurg's goals with 'agent z' was to have someone who knew buzz well enough to defeat him. given that zurg has known buzz for at least as long as warp has ( i think of their teamwork in war and peace and war and their intuitive understanding of one another in stress test and the main event ), that's saying something. my point is, twenty years represents the majority of my life. unless you believe buzz is over forty ( he could be! but i don't think so ), it's the majority of his life. and when you meet someone young, especially in a learning environment, you grow around them like a vine. there are grooves in buzz's personality in the shape of warp. sorry that was two steps over the homosexual line and i don't know how to gracefully extract myself from this paragraph. two trucks having sex. okay moving on.

what i'm driving at is that i believe there are ways buzz, perfect ranger, recipient of the order of galactic merit first class, representative of star command at 99% efficiency when riding solo, came to rely on warp that even he didn't know. it just happened. twenty years. teenagers to well-established adults. you'd know them like you knew your right hand ( you'd blow your right arm off to extricate yourself from them ). and then warp was gone. and while the violence of that loss is not negligible when considering buzz's response, understand that it would have been violence unto buzz either way, because that was a part of him. consider the sudden feeling of vulnerability, on top of the grief. you were one half of a whole, so you, by definition, are lesser now. you'll never be as good as you were with them. you wonder how much of your partnership was just them, or the thing that was greater than the sum of your combined parts. that's two out of three on it not having been just you, which is what you're left with.

blosc loves to be genre fiction, does not matter what genre, and it dabbles in noir more than once, and more broadly police fiction -- buddy cops without the humour. it gives maltese falcon. rush hour. eddie valiant at the bar. he was your partner and you're supposed to do something about it. hector kills patroclus and it's achilles' undoing. buzz has made-to-order cop backstory, and what holds this trope together in every incarnation, to me, is the depth of feeling. you cannot shrug this off and shed a single tear. you have to get pathetic with it. cry, lose your job, lose your other friends, spiral into alcoholism and debt; the loss of the partner precipitates absolute upheaval in the survivor's life.

how could a replacement compare? even if they could do everything your partner could do on paper, they don't know you. they'll never know you like that, not even if you spend twenty years together, because the person you are now is not the person you were when you first met your original partner twenty years before. this isn't inference at this point, it's not even analysis, this is textual to the film. again, genre. none of this is new. but damn if it's not done well. but what i think the movie misses, because it's busy making its actual point and not the point i want it to make, is the chance to more directly address the death of buzz's sense of self. if you have spent your adult developmental years shaped by someone, if you owe a great percentage of who you are to them, and then they're ripped away, what's left? it's barbie and ken. it's buzz and warp. in the same way there is no 'just warp', there is no 'just buzz'. it doesn't matter that buzz is the one casting the shadow that rangers like ty live in. there can only be comparison with multiple individuals. the inverse is true: for buzz to be great, someone has to be less great ( let's not say 'bad', zurg has that covered, or 'incompetent', because no ranger is, not even the rookies ). i don't think buzz ever viewed warp as lesser. that doesn't even seem to be an issue on their radar, ever, not like it is with buzz and ty. but my point is buzz's partnership with warp made him shine. what was the deciding factor in that splendour? would buzz shine alone? ( yes. ) would buzz ever shine as brightly without warp? well...

so you've lost your spouse partner. you're at least in your thirties and the routine of your life for as long as you have been an adult is gone. blown to bits. cosmic dust. you launched an empty casket into space and the pictures you picked for the memorial show you as secondary to your spouse friend. it centers them and their achievements entirely. the love you felt was all-encompassing. and now you want to be alone, to grieve, to come to terms with what happened, and to get a sense of where you stand in an unfamiliar galaxy. it's a shame, then, that life goes on. there are patrols to do and taxes to file and hyper death rays to address, and the universe cannot sit and wait for you to do things like process the greatest upheaval of your adult life. you're out of your partnered era and into... what?

you were a student and then you were someone's equal, so maybe now you should be someone's teacher! that's reasonable. that's a natural progression. there's a rookie ripe for you! she's young but she's the best in her class, smart as a whip, and she has a lot in common with you ( she always knows best! she's two times too clever for the rules she enforces ), so why not take her? no, you're still grieving. no partners. what about this guy? he's wanted to be a ranger for forever, he has passion, he's been studying up, and he idolises you! would that work? no. no partners! okay, fine, a robot, then, if you can't handle a person. the robot is just like you, the robot will idolise you, will you take this? and because the robot cannot die, sure, okay. and you open the door a crack to being a teacher. and when you and the three newbies are the only people left in the universe, no, for real, you step up, you take control, and you see what they have to offer and you appreciate it.

SIMULTANEOUSLY. you discover that the partner you've been trying to find time to grieve is not actually dead. and we veer back into hard analysis territory here, because that's another emotional undercurrent that i wish had been delved into more. i mean, there are layers to that shit. the initial grief of having to bury someone you loved. the guilt of feeling that it was your fault, that they died so you could live, in part because there is an insane person who is obsessed with you ( again, meta for another day ). and now they're alive, and the circumstances of that revelation do not soothe the grief, they transform it. there's the immediate, the obvious: the pain that comes with any betrayal, especially that of your best friend leaving you for your worst enemy. the confusion over being left to deal with all of that initial grief -- how could they do that to you, didn't they know how much it would hurt? that's rhetorical, they know you better than anybody else, they knew exactly how much it would hurt, and they did it anyways. and they seem to be happy about it. now there's anger, and disbelief, and on top of it all you still feel lost. but you still have a job to do, so you fight, and you win. you save the day. you positive-mental-attitude the universe back to normalcy despite the emotional turmoil because it needs to get done and for all your flaws you have a heart of pure gold.

and that should put a cap on that situation! but... it doesn't. because the story doesn't end there. there's a whole series to get through. so what we've seen is the death of the old status quo and the establishment of the new. zurg is still there, buzz is still the pride of star command, but now he's got three kids and warp is on the other side.

i'm struggling to put to words the feeling that that evokes in me. i think it's relatable to anyone who's lost a best friend, not to death, but to time. they're gone, but they're still there. close enough to touch, but you can't. and you know them, but they're a stranger to you. you know the way they speak ( just like they know the way you speak - 'to infinity... and beyond : /' ), how they move, how they think. you know them, but there's a new side to them, one you don't recognise. and it's sickening, in a way, because it shouldn't be there. i had this whole multi-paragraph passage planned in the original version of this post, about The Gaze as a concept, and ego( -death ) and perception and all that fun philosophical nonsense. but i am not a philosopher, and we don't have time for all that, so i'll boil it down to what's relevant. we cannot ever fully know another person because we are hamstrung by our own limited point of view. there is no way to completely bridge the gap between the totality of what somebody else is, and what we perceive them to be. and i don't even mean this in a chiding, reductive way, this isn't something we do out of malice. the fact of the matter is, we cannot live inside another person's brain the way we live inside our own. the best we can do is acknowledge that they are as nuanced as we are, and that we'll never grasp all of them because we just can't. again, such is existing via comparison, such is being individual organisms.

buzz knew warp really, really, really well, but even if warp hadn't been lying, the warp in buzz's head and the warp that exists in reality are two very different things. it's not buzz's fault, it's not even a matter of fault, it just is. buzz could only ever take all that data gathered via observation and make predictions about what warp would do next. twenty years offered up a lot of data, but the issue is, warp is a person. people can change. people can act unpredictably. people can even act willingly against their own nature. as we cannot control other people's actions, there's nothing we can do about this, and that can be maddening. when a loved one suddenly acts 'unlike themselves', the sudden shift can have a dizzying effect. you think, 'where am i,' and 'who are they,' and try to reorient yourself. but anyone can act any way, anytime. i think of one bad day, or the breaking point. you would, if you were hungry enough. you would, if you were tired enough. we are flexible creatures. what was in warp was in warp for a long time, but it didn't fully show until he let it. and buzz's feeling of vertigo is completely understandable.

and then buzz tries to cope. he swings wildly between being angry with warp, missing warp, and deluding himself into thinking that this is just a phase, that the 'old warp', the 'real' warp, will come back. think of how he exhausts the list of evil clones and mind control before even approaching considering that warp just, y'know, did that. and even past that, he thinks warp is going to come back. he wants it sooo bad. up until their very last episode together ( ancient evil ) he wants it, and booster gets to spell that out for xr and the audience. but... this is wrong. i did not go into all of the above to crank my own hog, i wanted to make a point: buzz is seething sick because his image of warp does not line up with the reality of warp, and that's a major shortcoming that he's going to have to buck by the end of their mutual arc. because, morality and the idea of objective good aside, warp is not brainwashed, and he isn't being coerced. this is a choice he made with a clear head and time to consider the pros and cons. he says as much repeatedly, and buzz does not want to hear it. he's understandable! he's relatable! but he's also unfair here. he loves warp very much -- i'll even argue that he loves parts of warp that warp himself doesn't want to acknowledge -- but this is who warp is, and as long as buzz keeps rejecting that, they aren't going to be able to move past the break.

and buzz isn't the only one fucking up. oh, warp wants so badly to put star command behind him. he wants it to have been a front. he wants to be Thee Bad Boy, and sure, he's good at being bad, but on the scale of evil motivation in this show where zurg and nos-4-a2 and evilyear exist, warp's really boils down to, 'i want as much money as possible as quickly as possible so i can enjoy myself as soon as possible.' and is he willing to do fucked up shit to accomplish that? oh, yes. but post-movie, he never does anything quite as bad as the unimind. his goal isn't to cause pain, he's just willing to do that to get what he wants. splitting hairs? yeah, maybe, but there is a substantial difference between a sadist and someone without many qualms. and here's the thing. as much as buzz's perception of warp is a construct, it isn't a baseless one. buzz is insane! and we love him for it! but his understanding of who warp is is based off of observation, he's not pulling the veneer of nobility out of his ass. warp did the job for twenty years. and he dealt with zurg behind the scenes, sold weapons, sold information, but he also earned the order of galactic merit second class and the bronze cluster. he had buzz, who worked with him on a daily basis, convinced that he was not just good, but dedicated to the galactic alliance. there were positive, tangible results of his actions as a space ranger, and by my count, harm and help do not cancel each other out barring specific circumstances. you cannot unrescue that cat from that tree. you cannot unhelp that old lady across the street. 'you can't take it back, your actions have consequences' applies to the good as well as the bad, and isn't that a blessed relief.

and our actions make up who we are. so as much as warp wants to pretend that he has always been bad to the bone, we know that that isn't true. and buzz knows that that isn't true. so buzz has one half of the picture and refuses to see the other, and the same for warp on the opposite side. and their progression throughout the series, especially from tag team to ancient evil, is, to me, them slowly coming to terms with what they have become -- and more importantly, growing to understand one another better and in ways that their partnership in star command could not have allowed. yes, buzz has lost his routine, and some comfort with it, but he has gained a truer, fuller understanding of who warp is, and that in and of itself is rewarding. buzz didn't not know warp, but he also didn't have all the facts; there was a lie at the core of their relationship, and they couldn't be completely honest with one another so long as warp was a ranger, because warp just doesn't want to be part of star command. ( and good for him! good for him! ) if warp had stayed for buzz's sake, he would have been betraying himself, and even if they'd been happy, i think they're better off with everything out in the open. i think their relationship is stronger and more genuine for it.

buzz spends the series struggling with his rookies ( and maybe i'll make a different post, because this one is already too long, about buzz as a teacher and how that's a learning experience for him too ), but, eventually, he gets it down -- or he's on the road to getting it down. he isn't the buzz he was with warp, he's a different buzz, but not a worse buzz. not lesser. can buzz shine as brightly without warp? yes! differently. it will never be the same, but that doesn't mean it won't be good. and in the end, in ancient evil, when buzz literally gets 'old warp' and it's horrible and nearly kills him and their victory is reliant on letting warp be his sneaky self to steal the youth back from natron, they come back together. and it's good. it's real good.

man. i don't know. the older you get the more you will grieve experiences. we were too young to know, before. we learn how to deal with death, and then we learn how to deal with not-death, with the loss of someone who's still around, but they're not a part of your life anymore. maybe a relationship will change and you will grieve the empty space where someone used to be. and maybe they'll come back into your life and create a different space for themselves, and you will simultaneously mourn the old and celebrate the new. you'll make room to feel both at once and accept the contradiction. it's a feeling i've had as i've gotten older, nostalgic grief, and i'm starting to come to terms with the fact that i will keep feeling it, and keep changing. that i will grow accustomed to something and it might last twenty years but it won't last forever. that i will be uprooted at some point and that it will be painful and that i will survive it. i watched blosc when i was a child and i came back to it and i'm glad i can still get something from it. i'm glad the children's show has an adult protagonist who's going through some sort of quarter- / mid-life crisis. i'm glad it told the gayest love story of our time for no reason. i'm glad this tag is still active. i'm glad this post is over.

#blosc #blosctober #✩ no sign of intelligent life anywhere! ( ooc )#⭑ ready the mega head cannon! ( headcanons & blosc )#|| um. meow meow meow. meow meow meow meow.#|| so that's almost 4k words.#|| blosc buzz truly gives single mother runaway husband raising his three kids.#|| divorce. remarriage. blosc gives and gives.

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