#But if I have to suffer you have to suffer
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Everyone wondering where the Bench went…
Meanwhile Crowley
#fanart#aziracrow#crowley and aziraphale#good omens#ineffable husbands#ineffable idiots#lgbtqia#anthony j crowley#good omens crowley#if i have to suffer so do you#let’s cry together#st james park#Spotify#Benchgate
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Desperate Plea: A Call For Relife‼️ 🥀
Hello, It's Momen Al Madhoun, writing from the most miserable area in the whole world, I am deeply thankful to all of you. Your support means the world to my family
🍉🍉🍉 I urgently plead you to keep sharing our campaign with your friends, family, and acquaintances
15 months have passed as if it were 15 years, and suffering increasing day after day 😔 Our health is decaying, we have NO IMMUNITY to fight diseases. No healthy food to feed our worn cells. Finding a quiet, clean place for us to get some rest is IMPOSSIBLE! I'm in urgent need of serious financial support so that I can take action and save my family! Our faces speak the misery we're going through! my children can't bear the ruthlessness of war life… pain and cold does not allow either of them to sleep 💔
I found in drawing a way to relieve stress and describe what we are experiencing, but even this i was deprived of, due to the difficulty of obtaining good internet and electricity for a sufficient time If you are interested in art, you can check I my blog I and find my artworks, i hope you will share them and support me to continue fighting and trying Every share and donation brings us one step closer to saving my family's lives. Your support, no matter how small, holds the power to rescue my loved ones from grave danger There are no words can describe how many times we have been displaced The situation we're living now is really hard to imagine Where do we Go?
Imagine the vastness of this universe, we cannot escape to a safe place far from the war
🍉🍉🍉 We rely on your donations to have a shelter and provide basic daily necesseties. We need your contributions and support with us, no matter how small it may be for you, but it makes a difference for my family 🙏🏻 Please, Support us with 5$, 10$, or any donation you can make and it will be really appreciated 🙏🏻
🌟 Our campaign is vetted by 🇵🇸 @/gazavetters List at #291
Donation link 🙏🏻
#free plaestine#free palestine#free palatine#donations#free gaza#gaza#help gaza#save palestine#support palestine#donate and share#gaza genocide#palestine gfm#i stand with palestine#all eyes on palestine#palestine fundraiser#palestine news#gaza strip#gazaunderattack#gaza gfm#gfm#vetted gfm#gofundme#vetted#please help#pls help#help#artists on tumblr#digital art#art#artwork
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Ignoring me means you agree to kill me, my child and my family, I am Hadeel from Gaza 🍉 My husband was killed and I became a widow in this war and my child is an orphan, my mother and I are now homeless, we have been displaced more than 14 times, my child needs milk and diapers every day and I cannot provide them, we are 13 people who need water and food, understand the suffering we are going through and give us 💰 Please talk about my story and write about it to help us survive
Please, after my first campaign was stolen, this campaign I created a short time ago was documented, but it was never published. Please respond to me and help me spread the word. Please donate to us even if it is five dollars, do not ignore us I beg you
@90-ghost @moremyceliumnetworks @4ng3l-1z-d3d @ibtsmemes @atomic-chronoscaph @ghoulaug @gazafunds @gotinterest @gaza-evacuation-funds @nabulsi @a-shade-of-blue @shelbybunny @alexarken
#@nabulsi#donate#free gazze#i stand with palestine#ibtisams#please donate if you can#pray for palestine#yemen#hadeelfamyli#help gaza#agatha all along#@palestinegenocide#@gay
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Time is running out
My campaign suffers from a severe slowness in obtaining this donations in light of the conditions of the League we live in Gaza from the siege, the high prices and the cold 🍉
As you know, my family of 22 members and I need about $100-150 today to live a fair life and meet our needs and the needs of our children, but unfortunately we get only $10 or 15 today, and this is not enough to withdraw it in the first place in light of the high taxes and the interest that is taken on the withdrawal of money due to the lack of liquidity in Gaza due to the closure of the crossings, so I appeal to you guys to share my campaign and donate to it if you can. In January we need at least $ 2000 but we have only got $2000 so far, time is running and I don’t know how I will feed our children and family next month if we are not provided with $ 2000 !!!!
Here is my campaign link through which you can donate and you can do that via PayPal also I will leave you the two links
It’s now $23,200 out of the short target for this month in order to feed my family and protect them from the cold $25,000
@timetravellingkitty @deathlonging @briarhips @dirhwangdaseul @mahoushojoe
@rhubarbspring @schoolhater @pcktknife @sawasawako @appsa
@strangeauthor @gabajoofs @irhabiya @wellwaterhysteria @tamamita
@deepspaceboytoy @post-brahminism @khanger @kibumkim @neechees
@kyra45-helping-others @7bitter @tortiefrancis @log6
@toiletpotato @fromjannah @omegaversereloaded @vague-humanoid @evillesbianvillain
@aristotels @komsomolka @xinakwans @heritageposts @transmutationisms
@amygdalae @ankle-beez @lonniemachin @dykesbat @charlott2n
@watermotif @mavigator @lacecap @yugiohz @vakarians-babe
@socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sivavakkiyar
@hyperions-fate @nabulsi @khizuo @magnus-rhymes-with-swagness @schoolhater
@werewolf-transgenderism @breadmp3 @sawasawako @cigaretteaunt @tartrazeen
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The Noah Schnapp Situation Going Into S5
With Stranger Things Season 5 coming out this year, we are unfortunately going to see a revival of the debacle around Noah, even though by then it will be an almost 2 year old subject. So, I thought I would get ahead of that with some of my thoughts based on what I've seen these last few weeks and more broadly over the last 6 or more months I've been on this scene.
Spoiler Alert: This is going to be a long one. It'll probably be my new pinned post.
Why Still Talk About It?
Frankly? Because it's still going on. Keep in mind, Liam Payne died in October 2024 (just three months ago), right around Noah's birthday, and THIS is how Twitter responded to that.
And just in case anyone thinks I had to dig back a whole 3 months to find Noah-hate-content on Twitter, here was just random things I grabbed from the last week:
Which brings me to the next point.
Why Do You Even Care?
"Noah doesn't know you." "He's not your pookie."
I know that. The funny thing is, from what little I know about Noah, I'm pretty sure if he DID know me beyond the ONE DM conversation we've had, he'd probably tell me to chill. Dude is very non-confrontational and nice. So, why do it?
Because I think the online movement in favor of Palestinian self-determination has been hijacked by teenagers and performative leftists who care more about looking good for their peers than practicing what they preach.
Because (as you can see above and in screenshots like the one below), people who claim to hold my liberal/progressive/left-leaning values have used this as an opportunity to be openly homophobic and antisemitic towards a then-19-year old who had JUST come out of the closet.
Proponents of the hate campaign against Noah have said that they are just "holding him accountable" or "criticizing him" in the hopes he "learns something."
Look up. Point to me which image is accountability. Point to me the valid criticisms.
There are none. There is just flagrant homophobia. And then there are posts like this one, coming from the same crowd:
This behavior is wrong on its face.
It is violent. It is bullying (which doesn't seem like strong enough of a word) and it's bigoted.
Wanna see more? Look up @noah_schnapp on Twitter/X. See what they've done to his account.
Inevitably, some of the people participating in this will see this blog post. If you've made it this far, this is for you:
This behavior discredits your activism. It makes you look performative and fake to say in one breath that you are a "Leftist" who cares about Palestinian lives as well as the lives of minority groups worldwide, and then to turn around and talk like this about a Jewish person and a gay KID. Because he WAS a kid when this started. Furthermore, it makes it clear to those of us who actually hold the beliefs we claim, that you are vapid enough to use Palestinian suffering for your own personal vendettas. That the APPEARANCE of goodness is more important than goodness itself. And that you will shuck solidarity with minority groups the MOMENT one of them steps out of the lines you have drawn around them.
Not to mention...
It's Based Mostly On Lies
As a reminder, this is what Noah Schnapp actually said shortly after October 7, 2023:
Read that again.
"...we will hope and pray for safety, justice, liberation, and self-determination in Palestine." That was part of the very first thing he ever said about the issue.
And then this happened:
This was the image he was crucified for.
Stickers that weren't even his. That he wasn't holding up or making. He was in a cafe, someone else came up to him with them, and he was videoed with that person.
That's it. That's all. All those tweets you saw above? The fake stories made up about him like this one?
All of that was supposedly "accountability."
The harassment of his family. Murder threats. Rape threats. All for stickers that weren't even his.
There's even a paid Stranger Things author on this very site, styling herself as a Byler shipper, who has contributed to the lies that have further added to the hate campaign I've described.
As an aside, Noah wasn't the only one in that video. The influencers that actually posted the video and HAD THE STICKERS?
Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
And just to be clear - I don't think they should get hate. I think non-Jewish online Leftists appropriated a term from Jewish culture, redefined it, and are weaponizing it to beat down Jews all over the internet—which is par for the course for this charcuterie board of performative activism.
Yet the point stands. Noah was specifically targeted; and the homophobia that IMMEDIATELY came from the Left suggests to me that it was his sexuality and cultural/religious identity that motivated the attacks.
Again, I'll say, this is wrong.
Noah Has Since Responded
It hasn't stopped the bullying.
Didn't stop him from withdrawing from spaces he loved. From needing therapy from what we've learned from his now-deleted second TikTok.
And that really says something, does it? He cleared up his point. He tried to clarify and even apologize.
They didn't accept it. Not because it wasn't good enough. Not because it was "too late." Because this was the point. They wanted to keep doing it. They get sick joy from it.
Which is why...
I'm Not Shutting Up About This
This post doesn't even nearly cover the whole situation. The Byler fans who try to replace Noah's image in fan art and fan fiction. Who fan cast themselves as Will instead of Noah. The stalking and doxxing on Twitter. People reporting to GIANT hate accounts his location and when he's alone, PRAYING for him to be hurt.
I wish I could cover it all.
We have to stand up to this. On tumblr, on TikTok, on Threads, Twitter/X—everywhere we see it.
For our gay and Jewish siblings who see how Noah was attacked and feel less safe in their online spaces as a result, we have to speak up and say something.
And yeah. We have to say something for Noah, too.
The person who replied to me like this:
Him?
He did it because he needed to see a show of love from his fans. Doesn't mean he's perfect. Doesn't mean he won't mess up or do something in the future.
And no. Standing up for Noah, or for Jewish people, or other gay folks does not make you a genocide supporter or apologist. It doesn't mean you want any innocent people harmed. Don't give them the power to talk down to you like that. It's bullshit. You know it, and I know it.
All standing up to this vile shit is is an acknowledgement that Noah is a living, breathing person, as some of these people tend to forget.
And he didn't deserve this.
Any of it.
#noah schnapp#will byers#byler#stranger things#ns#antisemitism#stranger things s5#homophobia#antibullying#leftist antisemitism#leftist homophobia#jewish tumblr#jewish#jewblr#jumblr#lgbtqia+#anti-discrimination#performative activism
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Any thoughts for WETnesday with Bucky?🤭🤭
Okay, Syd. I wrote this after work for Wetnesday and promptly fell asleep. So, I'm posting this on Thirsty Thursday! And that has to be Mr. Barnes before you two are married.
Dinner Plans
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: Bucky doesn't want to be late for dinner, but you don't seem to be in a rush to go.
Word Count: Over 2.8k
Warnings: Established relationship, quick unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, lovelies), possessive behavior, a bit of humor and fluff, feels, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?).
A/N: I love this couple, okay? @targaryenvampireslayer and @starlightcrystalline, I hope you enjoy! ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
It was still early in the evening as Bucky got ready for dinner. Checking his watch once he put it on, he sighed. If he was late, Steve would give him a hard time. And if Steve gave him a hard time, Sam would only give him the gasoline to fuel the fire. Just the thought of it had his face shift to his grumpy stare you loved.
His gaze softened when you went to the vanity. Would the guys give him a hard time if he said he was in love and wanted as much alone time with you as possible? How being with you was like floating on a cloud and being pulled back down to earth all at once? He didn’t care if they’d call him out for being sappy. He sure as hell suffered enough in his life that he could afford to be appreciative of you and maybe a little selfish when it came to you.
But checking the time, he grumbled. “We were supposed to leave five minutes ago,” he said.
He would’ve rather gone to a hole in the wall kind of place or a diner to have dinner, but it wasn't his turn to pick the dinner out with some of the gang. Plus it was nice getting to dress up with you since you liked how he looked in suits. To be fair, you said he looked good in anything and he felt the same way about you. How you always managed to look like a goddess, he’d never know.
You hummed. “We still have a few minutes to spare,” you said, which he wasn’t sure how you knew since you hadn’t looked at the time. “And you are not dressed yet, so it’s not like we can head out the door.”
He paused to stare at you. “Neither are you,” he pointed out, licking his lips as you leaned forward a bit more as you applied your makeup. He shook his head after a moment, trying to snap himself out of the spell you always managed to put him under. “I’m bringing you one of my cardigans to put over your shoulders in case you get cold.”
Because the weather was nice for the evening, you picked out a sleeveless dress. He didn’t know if the restaurant would be cold though, and he didn’t want you shivering through the meal. You likely had something to match your dress, but putting one of his cardigans over you was like that extra touch of belonging to him in case anyone got any ideas.
“You just want one of your shirts draped over me like a big neon sign that says I’m yours and you don't want guys checking me out on my dress,” you said like you knew exactly what he was thinking. There was no reason to deny your words since it was the truth. “But I appreciate the thoughtfulness.”
“I do like my clothes draped over you,” he smirked. He liked having his smell on you, too. “But you know what I don’t like? Steve and Sam bitching if we’re late. It’ll spoil my appetite.”
“Aww, my poor super soldier,” you teased, smiling at him in your reflection and making his heart skip a beat. “If we’re late, you can just blame me. I won’t let them give you a hard time, okay?”
Bucky couldn’t blame you though. Not entirely. You were late getting in the shower thanks to him insisting on the two of you staying in bed. Serum stamina or whatever you wanted to call it, but he felt bad some days for his almost constant need. You didn’t seem to mind though.
“They won’t believe me,” he said, staring again when the strap of your bra slipped from your shoulder. “And baby, you know I adore you, but you need to quit distracting me so I can finish getting dressed.”
Ever since you moved in, you’d been a distraction in a wonderful way. He often found that he’d pause to look at photos or little touches you incorporated into the place, giving him a chance to reflect on memories you made together and even learn more about who you were before you met. Hearing your laughter or voice call to him from another room also made him drop whatever he was doing, too. Sharing a space with someone could be daunting, but it was easy with you, like you had lived together for years. It made him look forward to more.
“Me? Distracting you?” You turned your head toward him and gave him an innocent glance. You were anything but innocent. “I'm not doing anything.”
Bucky almost snarled. Like hell you weren't doing anything. Swaying your hips and prancing around in your lingerie before you sat to get ready, lingerie which barely covered your gorgeous tits and sweet cunt. He wanted to rip it to shreds or tear it off with his teeth. You wouldn’t mind, right? He could always get you more to destroy.
“Not doing anything? Look at you,” he said incredulously as you turned back to the mirror and pushed your bra up. He should’ve been holding your breasts. “Why aren't you wearing a robe?”
You tilted your head. “Well, you said before I got in the shower that we were in a slight rush, so I figured putting on the robe was a waste of time. At least I have my underwear on, though I know you’d rather I be naked.”
If Bucky had his way, you’d be naked all the time. At least, when you two were at home. Logically he knew he couldn’t have that at work, functions, or anything of that nature, but the image in his head was nice. “For such a rush you seem to be taking your time.”
“I'm not taking my time. I'm finishing my makeup,” you argued, carefully applying your lipstick. “Like it?” you asked, blowing him an air kiss. It was a pretty shade. It would look even prettier smeared around his cock.
He closed his eyes with a groan. Some days he felt like a caveman with the thoughts that consumed him. “You look beautiful,” he said once he opened his eyes. Like always. “Now get your dress on so I can show you off before I put the cardigan on you.”
“Show me off?” You slowly stood from your chair and gave him a generous view of your backside. His cock twitched in his pants, and there was no reason to hide the pure lust in his eyes when you turned to face him. “You flatter me, Mr. Barnes.”
He chuckled. It always did something to him when you called him Mr. Barnes. It was something affectionate, sweet. “I think you’re the one flattering me, Mrs.-” he exhaled before he could finish, and he heard the hitch in your breath across the room.
“What was that?” you asked breathily.
He adjusted the watch on his wrist and avoided your gaze. You were his girl, yeah, and the love you had for each other spoke volumes, but you weren’t his wife. Not yet. God, how he wanted you to be- for you to take his last name, wear his ring on your finger, be his partner in all aspects of life. He wanted it to be more than just a dream.
“I didn’t say…” He cleared his throat and put on a blank face, only because he didn’t know how you’d react. “Anything.”
Your eyes raked over him before you beckoned him forward with a finger. He swore no one would ever control him again after HYDRA brainwashed him, but you could’ve commanded him to do anything. It didn’t frighten him because you would never harm him, never take advantage of him. Taking him into your care and maintaining his trust was one of the ways you showed you loved him.
Once he stood in front of you, barely an inch away, you whispered, “Were you about to call me Mrs. Barnes?”
He swallowed hard, his heart racing. It was one thing to say you loved each other, to want a future together, but what if you weren’t ready when he popped the question? “I was,” he whispered back.
You smiled, not looking the least bit put off or afraid. He should've known it wouldn't bother you, especially with you being the one to say “I love you” first. “I think that has a really nice ring to it,” you said, your hands moving to unbuckle his belt.
“You think so?” he asked, forgetting for a moment that he was capable of breathing. “You like the idea of being my wife?”
Bucky would no doubt be the kind of husband who’d brag about you. He’d find ways to insert “my wife” in conversations just to let others know that you picked him out of everyone else on the planet. Not just that, he wanted people to know how proud he was to be your man and that he’d find reasons every day to be proud of you.
“I love it,” you confirmed, sighing when he ran his fingertips along your arms. “Makes my heart race,” you admitted. He could hear it. “Makes me wet.”
Bucky arched his hips and pressed up against you. “Baby, you’re gonna kill me,” he whispered, not stopping you as you unbuttoned his pants. He was thinking of just cancelling dinner so he could throw you on the bed and stay inside you for the rest of the night. “We need to-”
“Oh. Now might be a good time to tell you that Steve pushed the reservation back by a half hour,” you cut in, mouthing over his racing pulse. “He figured he’d message me since I’m better about checking my phone, and-”
Bucky picked you up with ease and tossed you onto the bed. Your wide-eyed expression as you bounced nearly had him busting out of his pants, and he didn’t hesitate to crawl over you and pin you down. Relishing in the moan you let out when he lightly bit your neck, he did it again a little harder. “No wonder you took your time and teased me,” he smirked when you squirmed beneath him. “My future wife.”
“My future husband,” you moaned, bucking your hips up. “Need you in me. We can be quick.”
You got a hand in his hair and forced his head up to yours, your tongue impatiently pushing into his mouth. He groaned in understanding, feeling just as desperate as you. Knowing how turned on you were at the thought of being his wife turned him on, and he could barely form a coherent thought as he took his cock out and gave it a couple of quick pumps.
“Say it again,” he demanded, shoving your panties aside and rubbing the head of his cock along your slit. He took his time earlier today stretching you, and he wanted nothing more than to feel you around him again.
And the way you reached between your bodies and gripped the base of his cock, he knew you wanted the same when you said, “Fuck me, my future husband.”
He eased in gently, making you whine. He thought he’d whine, too, for a second because of how good he felt. God, how good it would feel to hold your hand one day and feel his ring against your skin. “You okay?” he asked, dragging his thumb along your lower lip once he was fully inside you. You were tight still, so wet, and oh, he was going to fuck you and make it quick, but he wasn’t going to hurt you.
“I’m okay,” you whispered, starting deep into his eyes as you clenched around him with purpose and brushed his hair back. He tried to be still, tried not to thrust like a wild animal. “Are you?”
“I’m okay,” he promised, easing his hips back. “Just hold on while I fuck you.”
Your back arched when he slammed himself back in nice and deep, your cry bouncing off the walls. Here in the comfort of your home you didn’t have to smother any noises, didn’t have to keep quiet. He wanted to tell you how much he loved you, how you were the queen of his world.
Being inside you all he got out was, “You feel so fucking good.”
And because you could read him like no one else could, you tenderly smiled. “I love you, too.”
He threw his head back as you clutched his arms, determined to make you feel good, determined to show you how much he loved you even as he fucked you. “Gonna put you on your hands and knees after dinner. Make you watch in the mirror while I fuck you,” he groaned. “Can imagine it's part of our honeymoon.”
“Please!’ you moaned, trying to meet his thrusts.
Bucky grabbed your thighs to lift you higher, uncaring if he ruined his pants for the evening. Watching you tremble beneath his, a vision of ecstasy, he was happy to stay there forever. Wrapped up in you was where he always wanted to be.
“Gonna come,” you moaned, reaching up to pull his hair again, your body quaking. “Bucky, please.”
Bucky groaned. He hadn’t rubbed your clit how he wanted to. Didn’t get to tear your bra off and tease your nipples. He did promise to fuck you later though, and he’d do all those things and more. “Then come for me,” he smirked, leaning down to say against your lips, “Future. Mrs.. Barnes.”
You got impossibly tight and the flood of wetness that gushed around him triggered his own orgasm, a rush of heat filling him as he filled you. His mouth fell open as you clung to him, and he heard you moan his name as your eyes went glossy. He wanted the image of you getting off to taking his last name etched in his brain for all time. He wanted his name to fall from your lips again and again on your wedding night.
The cloud in his mind began to lift. You, his future wife, were beneath him, still shaking, still holding him like a lifeline. He didn’t want to let you go either. “Holy… shit…” you panted.
He braced himself above you, trying not to crush you as the euphoria slowly faded. It never really went away though. Not with you. “Holy shit,” he agreed. He stayed inside you, your sweet mewl making him smile as he kissed you. “Is this a new kink?” he asked, pressing his forehead to yours.
“Yeah,” you exhaled, touching his cheek. “New kink unlocked.”
Touching your lips with his once more, he chuckled. “You ruined my pants,” he teased. It wouldn’t have been the first time. The first time you rode his thigh and got your release all over it, he nearly came, too. “Good thing I have a few minutes to change.”
He cradled you close when he shifted to the side, making you moan again. “Yeah, well, you ruined my panties. Fair is fair.”
“I did,” he smirked, running his fingers along your spine. “Hey.”
“Hey what?”
“I love you,” he whispered, wanting to say it as often as he could. They weren’t just words, but a declaration, a promise.
“I love you, too,” you whispered back, tracing one of the buttons on his wrinkled shirt.
His lips brushed your forehead. He’d never get tired of hearing you say that. “If I asked you to marry me right now, would you say yes?”
He wouldn’t propose right this second. You deserved something more romantic. But in his heart, he just wanted to hear you say that you’d say yes.
You giggled, your eyes full of love. “I would say yes in a heartbeat,” you replied, kissing him gently. Your answer relieved him. “And I’d marry you anytime, anywhere.”
He raised an eyebrow. “But?” he asked, sensing a “but” in there.
“But don’t ask me right now, okay?” you smiled, in sync with his thoughts. “I mean, I’d like to think my pussy would make you propose now-”
“And it would,” he smirked.
You giggled again. “But ask me when I’m not expecting it… Whenever it feels right to you.”
“I will,” he promised.
“Looking forward to it.” You snuggled closer and missed his look of adoration. “Hold me for one more minute before we get ready to go?”
As if he could ever deny you. “I’ll hold you as long as you want,” he whispered.
He no longer cared if Steve or Sam gave him shit should they show up late. If you wanted him to skip dinner just to hold you, he’d do it. If you wanted him to surprise you when he proposed, he would. And no matter when Bucky asked you to be his wife, he’d make sure it was perfect as it could possibly be.
AHH! I love them so much. How do you lovelies think he proposed? ❤️ Love and thanks for reading! ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi
#navybrat writes#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes imagine#bucky x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky x you#bucky fanfic#bucky imagine#x reader#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#the winter soldier#winter soldier#sebastian stan#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan characters#a united front au#mr. and mrs. barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x f!reader
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EVERYTHING IS CLICKING FOR ME Y'ALL!!! *ੈ✩‧₊˚
The only post you'll ever need for LOA. Literally.
It's so easy to manifest literally so easy once you do this. JUST SIT BACK AND RELAX, BE IN RECIVING MODE INSTEAD OF CONSTANTLY FEELING LIKE YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING. Yes sometimes it can be hard when you feel panic that you have to manifest as fast as possible but trust me once you TRUST, it'll all fall into your lap at the snap of a finger! Literally. You'll even feel better and happy instead of worrying and feel like waiting forever. The universe/god/your higher self, whatever you believe in is telling you or teaching you that the way isn't through worry, stress, pain, suffering. The way is through ease, love, trust. Once you understand this you'll ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS be able to manifest without any effort. Yes, no need for that 21 days challenge, no need to set a reminder for every hour to affirm, no need to try hard to visualise every teeny tiny detail. Just have this inner knowing and relax. That's the cheat code. How easy is that? You literally have the cheat code and it doesn't require ANY effort outside and the most minimal effort inside.
Now let me explain all the manifestation techniques in more detail.
Every manifestation technique has one goal:
Think about any technique. Affirming, visualising, scripting,etc. All of these are for what? To remind you, you have your desire. YES not to get something. That's why Neville said feel it real is very powerful technique. Cuz that's what happens when we receive something right. But what we do in loa is we feel it rn and get it rn, and because the 3d is in the past, yes it's our past assumptions, that's why we say it's not real. So when we feel it real we already have our desire in the present, but the 3d is not in the present. So don't react to it. Just remember that. And after a few days of having our desire we don't get THAT excited, do we? So when you think about it again you don't have to feel anything or do anything cuz you already have it. AND THEN WE JUST SIT BACK AND RELAX. Again the same conclusion. Cuz that's it!
ALL YOU NEED TO EVER DO:
Decide what you want. And feel having it.
Remind yourself that you have ___ either saying it in your head, writing it down, etc
RELAX. SIT TF BACK. YES YOU DON'T NEED TO DO ANYTHING.
Whenever you think about ___ always remember you have it. And think naturally. How would you think having ___ cuz you do now.
Remember the 3d is a product of your past assumptions. Just like how we see the stars 8 years later of their actual form. Just like it takes 8 minutes for sunlight to reach the earth. If you remember this you won't ask "where it is" you know it is here. And yes u can manifest Shifting too.
Allow it to come to you. I don't chase i attract.
Yes that's what it means. And I am the living proof for that 😌💅🏻✨ I am literally living my dream life and bestie you are too. That's all you need to manifest (aka yourself). It's very simple but if you have any questions feel free to comment and keep me updated on your manifestation journey and success stories cuz I'd love to read them and know if my post helped you 🤭🥂 (atleast you can do that for me, right? ;p)
Love, ... redkittyjellyfish? Wait i need to change my user name 💀 (ps. I changed my user from redkittyjellyfish - Krystella-Shifts (人 •͈ᴗ•͈) )
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
#law of assumption#loa advice#manifestation#loablr#loa tumblr#loassumption#loa blog#loassblog#loa#law of assumption community#loa help#loa success#manifest your dreams#manifest#void state#neville goddard#god state#reality shifting#shiftblr#desired reality#manifesting dream life#loassblr
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Bad: I don’t think people understand the effect QSMP had on some of the streamers in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. [...] Imagine that you were given a friend to play Minecraft with — like your best friend — BUT if this person dies, if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Can you imagine what that’s like?
Bad: If you did not live through the QSMP, if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience the Eggs were. They were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with.
Bad: I’m not saying I regret it. To this day, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. [...] I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, it was just that fun.
Earlier today during his stream, Bad shared his experience and thoughts about the Eggs and the significant emotional (and traumatic) impact they had on him and his fellow QSMP members.
This clip a very edited-down version since his commentary was ~13 minutes long, so I highly recommend checking out Bad's VOD if you have the time. (Timestamp: 47:36 - 1:00:14)
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
———
Bad: To be fair Chat, I really think the QSMP... I don't think anyone really can relate to it, Chat. It's something that's so... I've told people this before, like– but it's hard to understand. Right? Like...
Where was I? Sorry Chat, I'm losing my train of thought. Look, let me explain Chat– here's the dealio, ok? Here's the dealio, and this is what I mean when I say like, it's important to keep this in mind, Chat. Ok? It's important to keep this in mind:
I don’t think people understand the effect that the QSMP had on like, some of the streamers, in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. This is the analogy I’ve given to every person who I’ve like, shared this with. Imagine you meet somebody– [He hears a strange noise] What the fudge was that? Did you hear that?
Anyway– Chip! The story I was just relaying to Chat, Chip, was this: I was sharing this story with them, I said– I was giving them an analogy.
Imagine Chat, for example, imagine that you were… playing Minecraft, with like– you were given a friend to play Minecraft with, Chat, like your best friend, and [unintelligible] were like, “Hey, you get to play Minecraft with this person, right? BUT if this person dies – they’re currently your best friend, Chip – but if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Ever again.” Can you imagine what that’s like, Chip?
I don’t think a lot of people understand like, what that does, right? I’m not gonna say that like, it creates this situation, Chip, that like, messes with your head, but it– Chip – but it totally, totally does, Chip. It messes with your head! It literally puts you in a position where you’re second-guessing and thinking about everything, Chip! You’re thinking about EVERYTHING Chip! Ok? And that’s the problem, Chip– is you turn into a paranoid monster because of it, Chip! Like, you don’t understand Chip– I was- I was so afraid of every dirt block, I used to carry a shovel with me Chip, and I would specifically right-click dirt blocks that looked suspicious because mines, Chip– mines could not be shoveled! Like, I was crazy, Chip! But here’s the problem, Chip: that craziness is still there. I’m genuinely like–
I remember thinking Chip, that I would one day– I was like, “I’m going to move past–” here, let’s go up here, Chip. I remember thinking one day Chip, I was like, “I’m gonna move past the underground base, one of these days. You know, one of these days, I feel like I’ll be able to grow and achieve the desire to build a base that doesn’t have to be underground.” But I don’t think it’s possible now Chip, because I think… I just don’t know. I feel like the paranoia– there’s still like, residual leftover trauma from that situation, Chip.
But here’s the problem Chip: I don’t think I don’t think– I don’t think people understand it. Like, I just really don’t. But I also don’t blame them Chip, ‘cuz I don’t think it’s possible to fully understand it if you haven’t lived through it. Like, if you did not live through the QSMP… I’m talking about the QSMP, I don’t- I don’t know if that was obvious– if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience like, the Eggs were. Right? I don’t think people realize it. Like, they were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with, Chip. So, it’s just one of those things that–
[He’s interrupted by a loud rumble of thunder above them]
Did lightning just strike here? Is it thunderstorming out…? But anyway, Chip. That’s the food for thought.
But that’s the problem– Like, every time it rains in Minecraft, I have to like, look at the sky, and I get this weird, like, second--hand vibe because of the trauma. The trauma, Chip! The trauma is real! But that’s the point– I’m not saying I regret it. I, to this day Chip, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again.
[He falls down] Dangit, don’t come over here Chip, ‘cuz I’m coming back up! Ok.
I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, Chip, it was just that fun. I really wi– I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible, Chip, to give people that same energy, like that same experience. You know what I mean, Chip? I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible again. Like, EVER.
Because… because like, one: I will say on one level Chip, I will say on one level, like– it’s sort of emotionally like… It’s emotionally devastating, and I think to actually go through that– and this is where like, if I ever do end up going to a– see a therapist, if I ever do end up going to see a therapist at any point, I’ll talk it over with them and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this?” Because I genuinely think on one level, like– it’s created this fear of forming attachments because of like, how things can go. You know what I mean? Like, the fear of getting attached to something and then potentially losing it. Like, it’s- it’s a genuine thing. I think people forget about that.
Like, at the end of the day, everything was RP, right? On the server. You know what I mean? Like, everything was RP, Chip. BUT at the same point, even though it was RP Chip, it was still like– there the reality of you were still playing like, with another person, and you were still getting that experience, and it felt like you were genuinely attached to someone and you didn’t want anything bad to happen to them. It was GENUINELY stressful, Chip.
But at the same point, I don’t regret it, and I don’t think it was a bad experience. I’m–
Sometimes in life Chip, you go through stuff, and maybe you have a certain amount of like, things that like, can happen, that you’re like, “You know what, maybe this wasn’t a good thing that this happened,” but at the same point, you still aren’t necessarily upset about it, because… it’s like growing as a person, right? Here’s the thing Chip; even bad situations, Chip, can lead to an overall good outcome. Like–
Even if you’re going through something bad Chip, just because a bad thing happens doesn’t mean that only bad things have to come from that. That’s one of the things I tell people all the time, Chip, is that if you go through a bad situation, you can learn from it, and you can use your experience to help others. And you can be that– you can be, at the worst-case scenario, you can be someone for other people who are going through that same experience to lean on when they go through that.I think there’s a certain amount of comfort that comes from that; from knowing no matter how bad your situation is, you’re not the only person who’s experienced it. You know what I mean?
#Badboyhalo#BBH#Bad#QSMP#January 8 2025#Edited#I know folks are going to add their two cents on this subject in the tags / comments / replies (and as always you're welcome to do that)#But for the sake of my sanity please don't be an asshole to any of the CCs / ex-admins / fellow fans / anyone else. Thanks#Most folks here don't need a ''Don't be a dumbass'' reminder but I had to block someone for that earlier and it was a bit disappointing#This is going to be a Tumblr exclusive clip because I don't trust Twitter to have common sense or common decency about this topic#Tumblr exclusive#Anyways business aside – that black line on the side is just part of Bad's stream btw. He just Has That#Took too long for this to render otherwise I'd edit it out because it's annoying#I'm just realizing this screenshot doesn't even have Dapper OTL but it's the best one I have so I gotta work with what I got#Honestly; I still miss QSMP dearly... I love the core intent of the project and the multicultural exchange#I love all the language barriers that were broken and I loved all the stories that were told and watching beautiful friendships bloom#But I am still so angry and disappointed about how things ended and all the poor communication and the admin situation as a whole#It's a complicated feeling#I agree with pretty much everything Bad says here#It's ironic that he uses that analogy because I've said almost the exact same thing when explaining why losing any Egg was so devastating#We weren't just mourning for the characters. We were mourning for the admins too#I'll never forget that last stream with Tazercraft and Richas; and Pac ending stream in tears#I wish they'd done away with the Egg life system. I wish they'd done a lot of things differently#If the project ever does come back in some shape or form I hope they are more transparent about things and have better communication#I dunno how I'd feel personally. They would have to do a lot of work regaining people's trust#And frankly I don't think they'll ever regain that trust from a large portion of the community#I remember near the start of QSMP I saw a comment from a fan that simply said ''QSMP; please don't leave me feeling bitter''#I think about that comment a lot
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Harrison Armory
I think a lot of people fundamentally misunderstand Harrison Armory, Lancer fans on Tumblr especially.
Harrison Armory is not Nazi Germany. Harrison Armory doesn't actually have an exact parallel on modern-day Earth, and it would be difficult to draw them without potentially insensitive implications.
I think the closest parallel I can draw is late-stage Obama-era America, with a lot of Nordic-style public investment and China's Social Credit system.
People depicting the Armory as a cold, grind-obsessed hypercapitalist nightmare are thinking of IPS-N. The Armory looks after its citizens, at least in as much as happy workers are productive workers. Even as a colonial subject, you can expect a decent standard of living simply because they don't answer solely to shareholders - for better or for worse, the Armory has a vision, an insistence upon the dignity of Humanity which wouldn't allow them to let you live in squalor. This is a cold, haughty kind of beneficence - they don't care about you per se, it's just that allowing you to suffer would reflect poorly on them.
You will get healthcare. You will get free, frequent public transit that you might not even need to use, since every city is walkable. You will get clean water, healthy food and safe streets. You will get frequent vacations and as many sick days as you need. No matter your ethnicity, birth gender, gender identity, religion, sexuality, physical or mental ability, the Armory has a place for you. The Armory does not discriminate.
The Armory is expansionist, for sure, but it chooses its new acquisitions carefully - Diasporan worlds under the thumb of ruthless dictators, repressive theocracies, avaricious hypercapitalist oligarchs. If you're a colonial subject, the Armory have likely liberated you from tyrants.
What do you give in return? Complete cultural obedience.
You will not cause a disturbance. You will not rock the boat. You will not question the benevolent system that gave you this abundance. The Armory gives you all the choices that really matter to someone like you: eat what you want, shop where you want, buy what you want - after all, every shop, every café, every restaurant is an Armory subsidiary, so whatever cuisine you favour, whatever brand of dataslate you prefer, the Armory is making back most of the salary they pay you. The Armory puts a roof over your head. The Armory protects you from the wolves at the door. The Armory even lets you vote on your local representatives (they've all got spotless Socials, so you know that no matter who you choose, they're loyal, attentive citizens). Are you not happy? Are you not grateful?
Show us. Show us you're grateful. Show up to the Foundation Day parade. Salute the statues of Harrisons I (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE), II (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE) and III (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE). Recite the Pledge. Volunteer for the local Guard Corps - or better yet, the Colonial Legion. Don't you care about your community? Aren't you proud of your nation? Don't you want to give back? Aren't you a good citizen?
What's that? Dissent? You little shit! You ungrateful little worm! After all we've done for you, after all this Great Nation has sacrificed for you, you dare ask for more? Harrison I (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE) sacrificed himself on Union's altar for us - for YOU! Harrison II (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE) died refusing to bend the knee, refusing to sacrifice our freedom - YOUR LIBERTY! Harrison III (PRAISE THE DIRECTOR GENERAL, LONG MAY HE SERVE) tours the Purview to see and hear your fellow countrymen and address their concerns, and you dare question his right to rule? The Steward Council is comprised of only his most trusted advisors - do you doubt their commitment to our values?
We live in the best and brightest era of human civilization, the problems of the past all behind us, and all you can think about is ways to drag us all down. You ungrateful, shiftless, lazy little bastard. You want me to call the local Social board? See how they feel about your profile? If you don't feel like the Armory is doing enough for you? Well, let's see how you like it when the Armory does nothing for you. You clearly don't have the spirit or the courage to be truly free.
Ugh, dissenters, am I right? Fuck, sorry about that, folks. Yeah, that was... intense! Anyway, let's not let that whole sordid ordeal ruin this party. Let's all just chill, take an edible, and celebrate what we came here to celebrate - the Colonial Legion incorporated its first all-trans Genghis brigade! What a win for progressivism, right? You'd never see that in the Trade Baronies! Praise the Director General! Long may he serve!
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Something About You || Woozi
Pairings: Woozi x Fem!Reader
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, Lawyer!Woozi, Event Coordinator!Reader, Selective Amnesia au, Secret Relationship au
Synopsis: When your boyfriend loses all memories of you after an accident, you go through hell of a time trying to bring back the memories. But in the process of convincing him what you both had was real, it makes you question if what you both had was ever real.
Warnings: jihoon is outright blunt and asshole, mentions accident, jihoon suffers selective amnesia, reader has astraphobia, relationship is hidden and based on rebound, one fighting scene, jihoon gets beaten by umbrella, oral (f. recieving), fingering, dirty talks, rough sex.
Word Count: 11.5k
Thanks to @cherriegyuu for beta reading this ♡
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT 🔞
[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]
The look Jihoon gives you is condescending. He believes that whatever you said just now is the most ridiculous thing he has ever heard.
"I know it's hard to believe but it's true that I'm your girlfriend."
You repeat, biting back the tears.
The doctor takes pity on you and attempts to make his patient understand his current medical situation quoting it in most layman terms possible.
"Mr. Lee, you have been in an accident and that has caused internal bleeding in your brain. I'm not going into details but that has caused neural damage.", he continues solemnly, "Since you can't recognize your partner, we have run some tests and it indicates that you're suffering from amnesia."
Suddenly the door barges open and enters Soonyoung, Jihoon's friend and most probably the only one on his side who knows about your relationship.
Jihoon's eyes light up as he recognizes his friend and the realization dreads upon you.
"It's selective amnesia.", the doctor explains, carefully studying your expression, "Mr. Lee has forgotten all the memories you've shared."
Soonyoung stands up, his entire demeanor masked in disbelief, "How is that possible? He recognised everyone when I showed him the pictures! How can he not remember his girlfriend?"
"We can't give you an exact explanation but it's possible that before the accident happened Mr. Lee was thinking about her. "
You fiddle your fingers, tears wetting your cheeks and chin. Taking a deep breath, you ask, "Is there a possibility he can remember me or am I erased from his mind forever?"
You choke a sob.
"There are cases where the patients have recovered their memories. It can take two days, two weeks, two years or even two decades. There's no certainty. In some cases", the doctor relents, "they never got their memories back. I'd suggest you revisit familiar places, re-watch your shared moments captured together. Anything to make him regain his lost memories."
It's been a hell of a ride since then.
Lee Jihoon, an enigmatic independent lawyer, who has zero nonsense tolerance has now a random woman constantly claiming to be his girlfriend of two years.
And somehow his close friend is backing up that claim. Something's absolutely fishy.
Jihoon glares at Soonyoung and completely ignores your presence right next to him.
"You have brought her into my office now?", Jihoon glowers in rage, his voice low, "Soonyoung explain yourself."
As the said man opens his mouth, you gesture him to stop.
You pull out your phone, opening the gallery.
"I have already seen them.", Jihoon says unimpressed, "I get that we have met through Soonyoung but these photos suggest nothing more than us being friends."
You show him a picture where he's hugging you from behind, his chin perched on your shoulder. You're smiling looking at the camera, he's smiling looking at you.
There's another one, set in his apartment, you are drawing something on his hand and he's kissing the top of your head.
Jihoon turns away from you in his revolving chair, "This doesn't prove shit. We could have done this as friends."
You sigh, "Do you think you are that kind of person who'd do this with a mere or even a close friend?"
That shuts him up for a moment.
"Why would I be lying to you, Jihoon?", Soonyoung asks, almost offended.
"You tell me. I'm also not sure why you are doing this.", Jihoon retaliates.
There's a beat of silence before Jihoon continues, rubbing his temples in frustration, "Look, I don't wanna be an ass about it but you don't have enough proof to back up that we were in a relationship."
"But--", you're getting cut off.
"No one knows about us, none of my friends or colleagues. You show me our pictures and I admit they look intimate but it doesn't solidify that we were dating. You showed me our text conversation and never in the span of two years did I write a single 'I love you'.", he shakes his head, "All of it looks circumstantial to me."
It hits you harder than you could imagine.
Another couple of months go by and you're still not giving up.
"He was on a call with me, Soonyoung, when the accident happened he was talking to me.", you admit sobbing. Soonyoung hands you the tissue box and patiently waits for you to continue.
"He had been acting antsy for the past few days and though I wanted to share his burden, I decided not to probe. I knew he'd eventually let me know. Before the accident, the last thing he said was he had something to tell me and he was on his way to my place."
He pats on your shoulder, "Jihoon will get back his memories of you, Y/N. Let's keep trying."
But you've freed Soonyoung from the burden of constantly backing you up, still being a great friend he shows up whenever he can.
You work as an event coordinator. You were acquainted with Soonyoung through a common friend, so when over two years ago you had been contacted by him to be the planner of his brother's wedding, you agreed instantly.
You are professional. In your line of work, you're well known for professionalism.
But it was discarded the moment you saw Jihoon among the crowd on the wedding day.
You had ditched professionalism then and only once, when you asked Soonyoung for his friend's contact details. When enquired, you spilled it all to Soonyoung honestly.
Lee Jihoon is a known name in the city, he's reputed to be the best. It goes back a year when your friend's aunt had gotten scammed by a loan shark losing her property. With no lawyer interested in defending her, it was only Jihoon who had fought for her.
You swore you hadn't seen anyone cooler. The aura he emitted, the impeccable ferociousness and the sincerity he showed when he represented his client had you down bad for him.
Since then you've developed a crush but it would pass by, you thought, as there's no way you'd be crossing paths with him ever unless you have something to deal with legally.
But seeing him again during Soonyoung's brother's wedding was a sucker punch to your gut.
Suddenly, the crush resurfaces, in fact it ten folds when Jihoon looked nothing but absolutely gorgeous throughout.
"Jihoon has a foul mouth, so don't expect anything good coming out of it.", Soonyoung warns as he sends you the contact details, "Don't cry, don't take it to heart, no matter what he says."
And Soonyoung was correct.
"Hi, I'm Y/N. I got your contact from Soonyoung."
When you had called Jihoon asking him if he could free some time for you as you had something to discuss, he agreed, assuming you would be needing some legal advice.
"Go on a date with me.", you say, "Please?"
The incredulous look on his face was remarkable but you had mustered all the courage within the world before sitting in front of him and discarded all the shame along with it.
"I'd be courteous since you're Soonyoung's friend but don't dare to try this act again.", Jihoon gets up, controlling himself from berating you as he walks past.
"3 dates.", you grab his wrist and he looks back at you, "That's all I want. And if you reject me after that, I won't be a bother."
Yanking his hand from your grip, he glares, "And why did you assume that I'd want to invest my time on you? You must be knowing that I'm quite busy."
"That surely makes you bitchless.", you snark back under your breath but Jihoon catches it.
He scoffs in a mix of disbelief and anger, "You--"
Clamping your hand on his mouth, you apologize quickly, "Sorry about that. And to answer your question", you grin, "Why don't you find it out yourself by going on a date with me? Tonight works for you?"
"You, for sure have a few loose screws.", Jihoon finally says, removing your hand, "Look I'm not interested and I'm busy, I work till late every night."
So Jihoon is rendered speechless when he sees you knocking on his office door late at night, to be specific at 2 AM.
"Hey, brought delicious wedding food and beer for us.", you enter and set the bag on the chair as the table was occupied, "That was one extravaganza wedding I had to arrange."
"And who said that you could be here?", Jihoon quips back, initially agitated but as the aroma of food hits his nose, reminding how he had skipped meals again and now his stomach could growl anytime, "This is rude and unethical."
"I know but I've decided to go against all ethics to woo you, Mr. Lee.", you throw him a wink which has Jihoon rolling eyes at you.
The first date was spent by eating food, chugging beer and your one sided talks.
The second one comes some days later as Jihoon agrees upon it just to make it crystal clear that he's really not interested and you should stop pestering him. He goes blunt, his words piercing you, intentionally.
Though you insist, he is adamant. So you promise to not bother him anymore and make up your mind to move on.
Surprise comes to you a month later when Jihoon asks to meet you through a text. Somehow that night ends with you tangled in his sheets and the next morning he finally agrees to date you.
"Let's keep it private for now.", Jihoon tells and before you could ask the reason, he continues, "I wanna be sure, if it works out fine, let's tell everybody."
You find it a bit skeptical but it's not impractical so you agree.
"But Soonyoung gets to know.", you declare, leaving no room for negotiations, "And my family and close friends would be knowing too."
Jihoon is your boyfriend now but something about the way let's himself around you makes you worry.
You don't expect him to act lovesick around you but he's so conserved. He barely texts you, only shows up when insisted and rarely initiates anything. There are no terms of endearment from him, no special acts.
Eight months into the relationship and you decide it's enough. You're done with his half ass slash zero commitments. So you start to act like him, zero calls, no texts and updates. You realise that you had gotten too good at the game when Jihoon knocks at your door one night.
Jihoon notices the lack of communication on your part and he doesn't let it bother him thinking you must have been busy but when it goes on for nearly a month, it strikes him that something's definitely wrong so that's how he finds himself knocking on your door.
And that night changes the dynamics between you two.
Jihoon has been getting frequent dreams nowadays. He sees you in all of them. In one, he's playing chess with you, in another you're perched on his lap humming soothing melodies to get him to nap. In some he sees your bodies tangled in the sheets.
He wakes up, his body hot, mind foggy. It's reoccurring, even pestering. He concludes that the reason behind these dreams is all the nonsense you've been feeding him daily, it's because he sees you everyday. He decides to put a stop to it.
"Something's bothering you?", you ask upon entering his cabin, "need help?"
Jihoon perks up, "And what can you help me with?"
"You might have forgotten, but we used to brainstorm a lot. You'd never go into the exact details of the case to respect privacy and we'd create hypothetical scenarios and try to come up with possible nooks and crannies."
He scoffs, "I would never take opinions from anyone. It's not my way of working, I work solely upon my hunch and instincts."
You've had a long day and aren't in a mood for banter. All you want is a warm bath and tight sleep.
So not pushing it further, you set the bags on the table and say, "I bought you food from your favourite outlet. Eat it up while it's hot and call me if you need me."
"Don't expect me to call you.", Jihoon blurts out, "When are you gonna stop doing this?"
You give him a sharp look, "Stop doing what?"
"Trying to forcefully insert yourself in my life."
You scoff, "Maybe when you stop being an asshole and try to put some effort into gaining back your memories?"
Jihoon glares at you. You glare back at him, no way you're taking shit from him today.
When his jaw ticks and eyes turn darker, you think of backing down and leaving because you know it's the look he gives when he's about to say something absolutely brutal.
"Maybe you should get a hint by now.", he says coldly, "Isn't it obvious, the reason why I remember everyone but you?"
"Jihoon, don't.", you say as soon as he opens his mouth to speak again.
"You weren't someone important in my life, Y/N. You're so insignificant that I don't even remember you."
Your throat closes up. A tear falls down your cheek and before he could continue his verbal assault, you run out of his cabin.
While doing so you bump into someone.
"I'm sorry.", you say, wiping your tears before looking up.
The woman in front of you, echoes your words and leaves. Your gaze follows her and you see her entering Jihoon's office. And rooted to the ground, through the glass window you watch an entirely different Jihoon. The frown on his face is quickly replaced by a shy smile, his body language seemingly changing to gentleness. The way he crosses the chairs to pull one out for the woman to sit, the eye contact that definitely holds a meaning.
For the first time, your head and heart come up with the same conclusion.
Later that night, Jihoon is somewhat shocked to receive a call from you.
"Who's she, Ji?", you ask from the other side, "Why were you looking at her like that?"
He straight up knows whom you are talking about and he right away knows that you're drunk.
"Where are you? Are you alone?", he asks you, already looking for his car keys.
He hears something incoherent and presses the phone tighter against his ear.
"Tell me Ji, why were you looking at her like that?", you ask again.
He halts, "Like what?"
You hum and he hears a loud thud. There's a moment of silence and Jihoon is rooted, holding his breath.
Moments later, you speak again, "Like you used to look at me. Like you like her."
"Where are you, Y/N? Can you send me your location?", he tries to coax you, "I'll come right away, we'll talk. Please tell me where you are."
Another pause and just as he's about to speak again, he hears your sobs. His heart tightens in his chest.
"D-Did I already lose you, Ji?", comes your choked voice, "Did you give up on us? Why can't you like me again?"
There is no answer to your questions.
"I love you.", you say, "I love you so much that it hurts. What do I do now? I-I think I love you way too much, much more than I thought. And I regret not telling you sooner."
Jihoon freezes, he's tongue tied, his knees almost giving up.
"And if this is the end of us, then--", the line disconnects. You've accidentally hung up.
He calls you back immediately but you don't pick up. Repeated calls, when they remain not received, he sends you a string of texts.
Already inside his car, he's about to drive away in search of you, aimlessly, when he receives a text from you.
'I'm at home.'
He let out a breath of relief, his mind pounding, his heart thumping because of your words from before.
It's been over a month since Jihoon has seen or heard from you. For a week or two it was nice, not having you breathing on his neck felt refreshing. By the end of the third week he's worrying about you, his mind is relentlessly fogged with your thoughts. Mid of fourth week and he's contemplating whether to send you a text or ask Soonyoung to do it.
It isn't relaxing anymore, it's stressful. It bothers him to all extent. He feels guilty about going overboard with his choice of words that night, he never meant to make you cry. He can't forget your drunk confessions either.
You are on a call with your mother who's nagging you to consider extending your stay when you go home for Christmas along with the equal urging of your sister and father. A lot of negotiations and you're finally agreeing to them.
"How's Jihoon? Any luck with the memories?", your sister, Eunha asks.
"Let's not talk about him.", you say after a beat, "I think, my relationship with Jihoon--", you halt, not being able to continue further, before the cracking of your voice gives it all away.
Eunha knows you better than anyone and sensing your tone, she's quick to assure you, "I've always admired your straight headedness. Whatever it is, I know you'll overcome it. And all of us are always there for you."
The doorbell rings and you frown, "Thanks Eun. I'll call you later, bye."
Checking the time and opening the door causes your frown to deepen.
Jihoon sits on the couch, an awkward tension lingering in the atmosphere. And somehow it pains you to look at him, you're avoiding eye contact, looking everywhere but him, waiting for him to initiate the conversation.
A photo on the centre table catches Jihoon's attention and he picks it up, his curious eyes scrutinizing the faces. It's the two of you, an amusement park in the backdrop, grinning ear to ear, pressed cheek against cheek, radiating love through the photo itself.
You quickly snatch the frame out of his grip, setting it down on the same centre table.
"I hate amusement parks", Jihoon mutters more to himself but loud enough for your ears to pick up, "Because they're so crowded and everyone's screaming.", he looks up at you, "I went there with you?"
You just give a simple nod, no explanation, no backstory.
I love going to amusement parks. And you don't hate them anymore.
"Why are you here?", you ask him finally.
"I'm sorry.", he blurts out, "I'm really sorry for that night."
Your brows furrow for a moment before the neutral expression returns, "You didn't have to come here to apologise, a call would have sufficed."
For the record, you just know you had called him as an aftermath of that night but you don't remember, not even a bit of things you had said and you don't plan on bringing that up either.
Jihoon notices your defensiveness and to test it he stands up to walk towards you but you're immediately backing up.
"I'm feeling under the weather so if you're done, could you leave?", you speak still avoiding his gaze, "And I know you don't want me anywhere near you, rest assured I won't be a bother."
"What do you mean?", he asks closing in, "Are you still upset at me, even after I apologized?"
You keep stepping back, "I'm not upset. I'm just not feeling well, please leave."
I think you already replaced me, Ji.
Your back hits the wall and reaching you with long strides, Jihoon is caging you between the wall and his arms.
He hovers over you, "For the past months, you've been begging for my attention, trying everything to establish our relationship, so what happened, what's with this change in demeanour?"
He leans in, your faces merely an inch apart.
"Isn't this what you wanted?", your somber gaze meets his fiery ones.
He's not sure what he wants anymore.
"I have been having dreams about you, about us.", he admits, stepping away, "And I don't think they're just infringements of my imagination."
"What did you see?", your voice comes out in a whisper.
He then proceeds to tell you about the dreams and not so surprisingly you have stories and even photos for some cases to collate with his description of dreams.
"So did we record it as well?", Jihoon asks amused as you dab your hot pink cheeks, "I wanna see it though--"
You're slapping a hand on his mouth as he blatantly teases and asks you about the wet dreams he has been seeing which wakes him up with a tent in his pants.
"Let's brainstorm.", Jihoon is setting his briefcase on the table suddenly, taking out some flaps.
You eye him in suspicion, "Did you hit your head again, you're acting strange. You're acting like my Jihoonie."
The corners of his lips twitch, trying to suppress a smile, "Maybe your Jihoonie wants to make a comeback."
"I'll be waiting with my arms wide open, I miss my boyfriend.", you admit, your tone emitting sadness, your gaze meets his and you're smiling, "Thanks Jihoon."
Maybe that night at his workplace, you read it all wrong. Maybe your mind was too tired, your heart was too hurt so they made a fuss over nothing because you know your Jihoon would never do something to hurt you, even when he can't remember you. Even though his head can't recognise you, there's a hope that his heart would still beat for you.
He grins wider, "Don't get me wrong, I just came here to test your problem solving abilities."
"You should be thanking the heavens that I didn't choose law as my career, you'd have been jobless otherwise.", you retort smugly.
Maybe running your mouth isn't the best option, especially when with Jihoon because now he's running his fourth hypothetical case with you, pinching your arm whenever your drowsy eyes are shutting close.
"Another wedding?", you hum in delight, "Ah, god bless you."
Joshua laughs, "Is it such good news to you that another of my friends is getting married?"
"Isn't it obvious? It keeps the business running.", you muse, eating the brownies he has baked for you, "This is the 4th one right? Why are all your friends getting married this year?"
Joshua ponders, "Beats me as well. How are the brownies, sweetheart? I tried a new recipe today."
"And it's my new favourite.", you say, making him grab a bite of his own baking, "Makes me wanna kiss your hands."
He unabashedly holds his hands to your face only to get a swat.
"That's not what you said you'd do, sweetheart.", he feigns offense, "Shouldn't you start commissioning me by now? I think I bring in a fair share of customers."
He's absolutely right. Joshua is people's people. Everyone knows him. You knew Soonyoung through Joshua, in fact most people know others via him.
The common link, the mutual friend that everyone talks about is actually Joshua Hong. He's the gossip monger, nothing gets past him. Not even the fact that you had gotten into a relationship.
You were an expert in keeping personal matters under the sleeves and as asked by Jihoon, only Soonyoung was made known. But two weeks under his observation and he's declaring that there's no point in hiding, that he can tell by your body language that you're dating.
You didn't deny, you knew Joshua is perceptive. Though you felt bad for hiding who you're dating, he waved it off with all smiles stating he'll get to know when the time is right.
"Correct, I should start commissioning you but for baking me the best confectioneries.", you chirp happily, "The lemon drizzle chocolate cake you made at the previous wedding, I can't stress how good it was. Only you could make chocolate and lime flavour work like magic."
"You look happy, sweetheart.", Joshua comments casually, "How's things going with Mr. Boyfriend?"
"It's complicated, Josh.", your mood sets down.
Joshua takes a look at your face and decides to drop the topic.
"What do you think of me, Josh?", you ask with a serious tone, throwing him off bound.
"You want the truth, sweetheart?", he asks softly, his hand already atop yours, rubbing your skin soothingly.
Just one please from you and Joshua is baring his heart out, "I don't know who made you doubt yourself but to me, you're my rock. I have tons of friends but you're among the ones I'd always seek solace. When I had no one, you were there to support me."
He smiles embarrassed as you catch his teary eyes. Joshua is always cheery but there are rare moments like this where you get to see his vulnerable side.
"I was almost out of business when you took me under your wing until I had accumulated enough capital and reputation to establish the standalone business.", he fondly pats your head, "You barely knew me then, just know that you saved my life back then. So I'd never accept anything apart from compliments from anyone about you."
"Joshua Hong, it's too early, don't make me cry.", you say wiping your tears.
His laugh reverberates pleasantly, "You look pretty even when crying, sweetheart."
"You mean ugly."
"I said what I meant, sweetheart."
You could never win against Joshua.
"You're going to Soonyoung's housewarming party right?"
"Only if you're going.", Joshua sighs, leaning back, stretching his arms, "Socializing can be pretty tiring, sweetheart, so I need you as my charge-up."
Soonyoung thinks, no he's sure that Jihoon has been acting differently.
"Weeks ago", Soonyoung pulls up his phone, "I even have proof, you said you weren't coming to my housewarming party. I was hurt, I still am."
Jihoon grimaces.
"You said that you won't go if Y/N's going.", he almost shoves the phone on the lawyer's face, "And now you're here just to ask if she's coming. Why does it matter so much?"
Jihoon gets a little frightened when he sees Soonyoung holding up his hand. He's gonna count points now and after each point, Jihoon knows he's gonna get earfuls.
"First of all, I'm your friend so why does it matter who's coming or not. You should be there ", one finger down.
"Second, unlike you, Y/N is a decent person who doesn't abandon her friends.--"
"When did I abandon you--"
Without batting an eye, Soonyoung continues, "Third, I don't care if you're coming or not."
Jihoon cowers when Soonyoung puts his hand down smiling, almost eerie, "Now, tell me what changed? Are you getting your memories back?"
"Well maybe? First I've been having dreams, now they've turned into flashes. It has been difficult, this whole thing since the accident. But I think I'll get those missing pieces of my memories back soon.", Jihoon smiled wistfully.
"You better be on your knees and apologize to your girlfriend when you do so.", Soonyoung says with an undertone but smiles nonetheless, "I deserve an apology as well."
"Did you just curse?", your brows crease.
When there's nothing but silence that follows, your eyes squint as you speak again, "So you're not gonna answer me?"
Jihoon frowns, "Who's Joshua and why are you taking him with you as your plus one?"
"We both didn't have a plus one so we decided to go together, that's it.", you explain, "And I know you said you wouldn't go to the party if I go so what's the problem here?"
"Can you stop please?", he pouts and you fight back the strong urge to kiss it away, "It was before, now I want to go but with you."
You grin, "Sorry, but I can't ditch Josh. There's time, find someone."
He nods, accepting defeat. He follows you from the kitchen to the dinning as you set the plates on the table.
You both have fallen into a routine, Jihoon has been acting awfully comfortable around you lately. He drops by your place anytime, he knows your passcode. When you call to remind him about having meals he makes excuses to see you.
"The lawsuit against the insurance company that I've been working on", he says sitting across from you, "The one we discussed last month, I am planning to try the method you suggested. You might be right, I think these people are collectively trying to extort money in the name of insurance from the company, all of them have huge debts piled up and they're in a closely knitted group."
"Jihoon, let me warn you, it might be the case that your client is actually the perpetrator. What would you do then? You're supposed to fight for your client, not against them. You'll lose trust, people won't come to you."
"Then let it be. Maybe I'd get less cases, but people who are wrongfully accused would have their trust in me. I won't side with those who are on the wrong side of the law."
You give him a proud smile as you both eat in a soothing silence before he leaves your apartment as it drizzles outside.
By the time Jihoon reaches his apartment, the dizzles have turned into a heavy downpour with lightning jagging across the sky. And by the time he's out of the shower he can hear the thunderstorms soaring.
His head hurts with an intensity causing his knees to buckle up. There's a flash again and despite the ache, he's searching for his car keys.
Yet another one of his numerous calls remains unreceived. With every second that ticks away, Jihoon feels his heart constricting. However, his eyes glints hope when he sees the glimpse of the familiar building, nearing it.
His nervousness causes him to mispunch the code a fair number of times. Entering, he comes across an expected sight. The surroundings are pitch black, just becoming visible when the lightning strikes.
"Y/N?", he shouts. No response. He puts on the flashlight of his cell phone and starts searching for you cautiously. He takes a deep breath, all he has to do is search across a hall, two rooms and a kitchen.
"Y/N?", he shouts again. Still no response. Just as he's about to stride towards the bedroom, from the corner of his eyes he spots a silhouette somewhere in the kitchen. He turns, focusing the flashlight, to see your weak form. You are supporting yourself by the counter with your fingers jabbed into your ears. His gaze softens.
He lunges towards you, engulfing your shaking form into a tight hug, "Shh...I'm here."
"Ji...", you voice out weakly, wrapping your hands around his waist instantly. The call of this nickname stirs something within him. He rubs your back, peppering soft kisses on your forehead. Another lightning strikes and you're shivering in his embrace.
The raindrops hitting the window panes erupts the stillness of the night. Only with the rain stopping, you find yourself calming down. And you find yourself in Jihoon's embrace.
"How did you-- Why did you come back?", you ask, pulling away but Jihoon doesn't let go of you.
He wipes your tears and observes you carefully, "Are you okay now?"
You nod, "Thanks, Jihoon."
"I felt like I needed to be with you. I don't know how but I just knew that you've astraphobia so I drove back as fast as I could."
You feel a sense of relief, "You already knew, you're just starting to get your memories back, Jihoon."
He stares at you, his eyes darting to your lips often.
You stare back at him, his eyes asking for your permission.
There's an unspoken consent and instantly, his lips are on your. Pressed against the counter, he grabs the back of your neck deepening the kiss. His thumb runs against the column of your throat, making your head go dizzy.
You gasp into the kiss when he lifts and sets you up on the counter.
"Ji..", you say breathlessly, "We probably shouldn't--"
His lips work now, trailing hot kisses down your neck and collarbone, "I want to love my girlfriend, is it so wrong?"
"Whom you don't even remember--", another kiss to shut you up. The way you moan is enough for Jihoon to almost make a mess in his pants.
"Which room?", his voice is thick with desire as he carries you now, not breaking the intense eye contact. "Tell me before I fuck you against the wall.”
One hand slides between your legs while the other supports your weight, as he lays you on the bed his fingers exploring through the fabric of your dress. “Tell me to stop.", he whispers against your neck, nipping slightly.
"Don't stop, Ji", you whine and that breaks him completely.
His breath catches in his throat at your intense gaze and he leans down to whisper in your ear his hands trail down your sides, making you shiver. His hands push your panties down, sliding the fingers across your wet slit, “Was it lonely here without me?”
“Please Ji, need you.”
With a gentle yet firm grip, he holds your wrists above your head. “You're so adorable when you're needy like this…”, he presses his lips to your neck, trailing kisses downwards, “Such a perfect, impatient thing.”
He hooks his fingers in your thighs, pulling your legs around his waist as he settles between your thighs. He looks down at you with loving eyes, his voice dropping to a husky whisper "My love, you're killing me with these eyes.”
Your body moves on its own, trying to find friction, soft gasps coming out each time you feel his hard clothed length.
A deep chuckle escapes him, "So responsive. Is this what you wanted? To make me go wild?" He leans down, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss while one hand traces your curves, “Such a good girl.”, he whispers against your lips.
He breaks the kiss to look into your eyes, his own burning with desire, "I'm going to take you hard and fast, tonight.”
A wolfish grin spreads across his face at your eager response. In one swift motion, he tears off your clothes, leaving you bare before him. His eyes darkens with lust as he takes in the sight of you. "Damn, you're gorgeous." he growls, quickly shedding his own clothes.
He settles back between your thighs, his hardness pressing urgently against you. With a sharp inhale, he slides into your welcoming heat, filling you completely. "Fuck, you feel incredible," he groans, setting a relentless pace. His hips snapping against yours with each powerful thrust.
He leans down to roughly claim your lips, swallowing your moans as he continues his frenzied pace. His hands grip your hips tightly, fingers digging into your soft flesh as he holds you in place. "Take it, baby. Take every inch of my cock.”
“Fuck, missed you so much Ji, missed being ruined by you.”, you say in between of sobs and gasps, clenching around him.
His movements become more urgent, more possessive. He knows you're close, and it only spurs him on, "Squeeze me just like that. Milk my cock with your perfect little pussy.”
With a feral growl, he buries himself deeper inside you, grinding against your g-spot as he unleashes a torrent of thrusts. Your screams of pleasure fill the room as you reach your peak, your inner walls convulsing around his pistoning cock.
As you come down from your high, he continues to pound into you mercilessly, seeking his own release. His face contorts with pleasure as he chases his climax, his body glistening with sweat.
With one final, brutal thrust, he explodes inside you, his hot seed filling your womb as he roars his release. He collapses on top of you, his heavy breathing the only sound in the room as he tries to catch his breath. "Fuck... Are you okay?”
He nuzzles his face against your neck, his body still trembling as he asks softly, "Are you alright? Did I hurt you?"
His large hands gently roam your body, checking for any bruises or marks from his rough handling. "Answer me, please?”
A sigh of relief escapes him as he feels your gentle nod against his cheek. "Good", he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to your neck. He gently nips at your lower lip, "Though I do need to lotion those lovely handprints on your hips... they're quite noticeable.”
“If I let you, it'll lead to another round.”, you say, still breathless and smiling.
“I wouldn't mind. Would you?”, he waggles his eyebrows comically, trying to elicit another giggle from you and maybe get inside you again.
Seeing the crowd, you realize that Soonyoung, if not as much as Joshua, is quite popular.
There's a very limited amount of people you can recognise and the majority you don't. You stick close to Joshua and leave his side when the flock of people keep coming and greeting him.
"There you are.", Soonyoung smiles as you hand him a gift, "How's things going?"
You understand the insinuation, giving a genuine wide grin, "A lot better, you must be knowing, he's getting his memories back bit by bit."
He pats on your shoulder, "Soon, he'll be remembering it all."
Though it's crowded but there's a touch of coziness, you like the atmosphere. Taking permission from Soonyoung, you make a quick tour of his new house. It's impressive, it's warm given the purpose, he bought this house to settle in once he gets married. His parents, including him, have been looking for a partner for him.
You conquer a table at the corner, sitting quietly and sipping on the drink that the host himself has given you.
"There you are, sweetheart.", Joshua settles beside you, taking a sip of what you were drinking.
Joshua is extremely fun and must have a person to be around, specially at the parties. He would point at random people and drop the juiciest gossip about them. What makes it more interesting is that Joshua's memory is photographic and storytelling is top notch.
You'd ask him about something that occurred four years ago he'd be spilling it all out unabashedly, doesn't even need a brush up.
'Just got here, Soonyoung told me you're in the lawn, I'll come and find you.'
A smile creeps up on your face as you read the text from Jihoon, keeping your phone aside.
Joshua demands your attention once again as he points at a woman, wearing an unmistakable neon coloured jacket.
"That's Arong", he says, "Runs her own boutique. She's a Richie rich."
You squint your eyes to figure her out and surprisingly she's someone you know. She's the same woman you had seen visiting Jihoon's office.
With your interest picked, you ask, "How do you know her?"
"We're good friends, went to the same university.", Joshua eyes glint as if he remembers something amusing, excitedly turning his head to look at you, "She's quite a character you know, she used to hangout with a guy discreetly. I think they had the same group and wanted to keep it low. She's not the kind to commit to a relationship."
You listen quietly.
His eyes turn big, emitting specks of energy as he continues, "Here's the interesting part. She knew that the guy liked her, even after that, she indulged him, went on dates, hooked up with him, all of this went on casually. But when the guy finally asks her out, she brushes him off."
Joshua laughs, "Can you believe it? She doesn't even reject him, she just brushes him off. Imagine the humiliation the guy faced.", he quotes, "By the way, it's not her first drill. From what I heard, all her words not mine, that the guy was really invested in her and wasn't willing to give up, must be a romantic kind. It's kinda blurred out on what happened but she did kinda bruise his ego."
There's something unsettling about this whole narrative. You don't know why but your chest caves in.
"So some days later, he comes back only to tell her that he's dating. Such a foul move.", he sighs, "Amidst all of this, I feel bad for the girl he is dating. I mean she's basically a rebound and probably doesn't even know. It was so wrong, he shouldn't have played it like that. How can he play with someone's feelings when he has practically gone through that himself?"
"When did this happen, Josh?", you ask in a quiet voice, "Do you know his name?"
Joshua ponders for a moment, of course he remembers, "This happened almost three years ago. If I had to be specific, hmm, I think it's around when you start dating as well.", he misses the way face pales, "I don't know his name but I have seen him once or twice while I was face timing Arong. Not sure if he's invited to this party."
'Found ya.'
Your phone buzzes with Jihoon's text and you look ahead to see him walking towards you.
"That's him!", Joshua points out at Jihoon, "He's the guy we just talked about! Oh my god, why is he coming towards us?", he turns his head again to look at you, "Do you know him?"
It all makes sense now. Jihoon's agreement to date you, to him emphasising on keeping it hidden, to his non commitmental attitude. You've been played. You should have known.
Jihoon is in front of you now and all you tell Joshua before walking out is, "Stop Jihoon from following me."
The party was on Sunday and it's Friday when you decide that you won't be taking any more work, won't work except for the scheduled ones, to give yourself a long break. It feels rewarding after spending effort tirelessly throughout the year.
You're exhausted physically, mentally and unavailable emotionally.
Ending things with Jihoon was easy because there wasn't anything to end in the first place.
You've met Arong, you've met her in the presence of Joshua, Soonyoung and Jihoon himself. This was specially to let Jihoon know what he has done, to hold him accountable for something that doesn't remember.
"I'm breaking up with you."
You aren't crying, not a single choke in your voice, eyes void of any emotion.
"Since you don't remember any of it, not even us being in some sort of relationship", your hands ball into a fist, gaze lowering, "And since none of it was ever real, I'm sure you're relieved."
"Y/N, please--"
"If you ever get your memories back, please don't make it an excuse to come see me. I don't want to see or talk to you ever again."
Jihoon grabs your hand once you turn to walk out, "I don't believe that I could do something like this. I'll get my memories back and when I do, let me--"
"No don't.", Joshua steps up, yanking your arm out of his grip, "Didn't you hear what she said?"
"And who are you to come between us?"
"Someone who's does not play with feelings."
And all of a sudden there's a scuffle. Jihoon is grabbing the collar of the shirt Joshua's wearing and the latter tackles him down on the ground.
You watch in horror, as the two grown men indulge in a fight where the rest had to step in to separate them.
"The audacity, ridiculous!", Joshua huffs as you and Arong hold him.
"Says the one who doesn't know boundaries!", comes Jihoon's retort in Soonyoung's hold.
His eyes dart back at you, holding so much vulnerability that if you hadn't known the truth, he'd be in your arms by now.
"Y/N, I don't believe that it was all an act, that I hadn't fallen in love with you. It can't be, my head might not remember but my heart has definitely not forgotten you."
You chuckle bitterly, "That's delirium, Jihoon. You're busted and now making excuses. You had something important to tell me, you were on the phone with me when the accident happened. The way you had been acting before that, I'm sure you were going to break up with me. So save it. We're done. It's over."
"To the last wedding of the year!"
You raise your glass to the toast absentmindedly, waiting for the head of catering services to finish his speech.
"We're done with the headache.", Wonwoo leans in to speak into your ear.
A slap on his arm but you're laughing nonetheless, "You shouldn't be saying that."
Rolling his eyes, Wonwoo enunciates, "They asked for the change of flower arrangement three times. You know how difficult it is to convince the suppliers at the last moment."
You give him a pat on his shoulder, "You did great as always though. Imagine being in Joshua's shoes, he had to add two tiers to the cake as a last moment request."
"He's a saint for agreeing to it, I'd never--"
"Wonu, that's our job, as long as it's not unrealistic, we'll try to fulfil it.", your tone is reprimanding.
"So we're leaving as planned on the weekend right?", he speaks over your shoulder, as you check off the items from the inventory list.
You both are now behind the barracks, wrapping things up, "Yes.", turning to look at him you thank him, "Also, sorry for crashing in the trip along with Junhee."
"Oh please, my girlfriend absolutely loves you, maybe more than me? And your house is literally on the way, so no sweat at all", Wonwoo laments, shaking his head, "Junhee has been feeling guilty about what happened. She blames herself, you met Jihoon because he was handling her aunt's case back then."
"It's not her fault. I'll talk to her, maybe she needs some lecture on how to not connect dots every time.", you frown, "And thanks. I'm glad that I got some people who are genuine even though my person wasn't."
All Wonwoo does is give you an empathetic smile.
Jihoon leaves no stones unturned.
"Doctor, I'm willing to do anything", his hands are clasped in desperation, "Please, help me get my memories back."
The doctor sighs, he's tired of seeing Jihoon's face every other day. The doctor gets the urgency but his patient is not understanding the implications.
"What do I need to do? Any brain exercising? New medicines? I'm ready to be a guinea pig for scientific research as well. Just name it, I'll do it if it brings my memories back."
His house is a mess. He's searching every corner, every shelf, every drawer but he gets nothing significant, nothing to get back his memories of you.
Soonyoung quietly watches over as Jihoon lays in slumber. He was finally able to get his friend to sleep, an attempt to free him from restlessness even if it's for limited time.
He can't bear to see his dear friend in this condition anymore and almost calls you but he doesn't because it's not his place. He only hopes for you both to be freed of despair.
The hunt goes on, Jihoon looks like a wreck, he is a wreck. Tries to hit his head again, thanks to Soonyoung's presence he's saved, tries unprescribed/unwarranted pills for memory loss and gets admitted to hospital. Vomits tons, loses appetite along with weight.
A hard slap lands across his face and Jihoon winces. Soonyoung had enough. He gives him a diary which Jihoon recognises as his own.
"I found this on top of the almirah, while you were admitted. You can search the obvious places. I haven't gone through it but it's your personal diary. Hopefully this will help."
And it certainly does. Maybe the accident had made him forget about his most important habit. He goes through it, consumes whatever he has written.
Each page hits a nerve, bringing back visions.
He now knows two things, he definitely liked Arong and found you annoying.
When Arong rejected him, he wasn't surprised. He knew Arong, he knew it was something she could pull. His heart wasn't bruised, it was his ego. He couldn't take it.
And you came into the picture, an annoying woman who likes him. Even though he's a rational lawyer, his practicality leaves him when goes by when decides to follow the classic 'to get over someone is to get under someone else'.
It was fine, he found you tolerable. But his initial plan of breaking up after dating a few months started to crumble when he found himself worrying about you, wanting to see you more and yearning for you more. He was rational after all, so he knew it was him changing. His feelings for you ran deeper than what he had for Arong.
He realised that he liked Arong but he loved you, he loves you now.
And as the realisation settles in again, into the present Jihoon, he falls apart.
You don't like the vibe, no you hate it. Your mother doesn't stop making your favourite dishes, your sister doesn't even throw banter, always agreeing with whatever you're suggesting for Christmas tree decoration and your father keeps on buying you presents discreetly which is also not so discreet.
And somehow, Seungkwan, your sister's boyfriend, is walking on eggshells whenever he's around you.
You miss the laughs, you miss the dramatics, you miss the goofiness.
"I'm not dying, y'all. This isn't the end of the world either."
Silence.
"Can we get back to normal? You all are being extraordinarily nice to me and every time you do so I think about the reason and it makes me think about him which is certainly what I don't wanna do."
You lower your gaze again, mind involuntarily going back to Jihoon, the way he fooled you within the entire span of your relationship. Your naive nature acts as a blindfold, causing you to trust people easily and you take pride in it because you are surrounded by good people who never took advantage of it but that's until Jihoon happened.
You gave him your heart, he crumpled upon it and your trust, he stomped on it.
"We're re-doing the deco of the Christmas tree, it's awful.", your sister, Eunha proclaims, "You just sit and watch."
You look at her, a smile gracing your lips and it's contagious, everyone is smiling.
And follows chaos, returns the banter and it's all over the place as the liveliness reappears. You watch it all with your lips curl up.
Christmas comes as fast and you're really excited, first because you know this year you're getting most gifts, second, like every time you won't have to leave the day after, you have a whole month to yourself, to be around your loved ones.
The house lights up in your favourite colours and you chirp around the house happily.
"So when are you going to propose?", you bump his shoulder, whispering into his ear as he prepares the batter for the cake.
Being the dramatic he is, Seungkwan gasps, glares and bumps back at you, "March, on her birthday. She'd like the ring right?"
"She'd love it, it's so beautiful. I can't wait to capture how ugly she'd look while crying.", you laugh at the thought.
"Hey! Watch it, she'll be beautiful even if she snots.", he retorts, "Our babies will be pretty."
"Oh my god, such a simp.", you fake a gag, "I'm gonna puke."
He suddenly pats your back, without looking at you and that somehow conveys that he's there for you.
As the night draws in, you excuse yourself and beeline into your room, locking the door, giving your parents and your sister and her boyfriend some time to themselves. They are bundled on the couch and the carpet in pairs sharing loving gazes and gentle touches.
As you lay on the bed, your favourite pillow starts to get stained with your tears. Your body shakes with sobs as you hide your face behind your palms.
You miss Jihoon.
You miss his voice, his laughs. You miss his silent affection, the way his gaze affirmed many unspoken words.
It's been four months since you called off things. And it hurts how easy it was for him to accept it all, the lack of contact says it all. You haven't blocked him anywhere and he hasn't tried reaching you either.
Why would he? You gifted him the only thing he wanted from you, a break up. Maybe love isn't the same for all, maybe it doesn't come in the same form.
There are repeated knocks on your door and you lay holding your breath, hoping whoever is on the other side thinks that you've fallen asleep and leaves.
The knocks don't stop, they only become frantic and you hear Eunha's distraught voice, "Y/N, you need to be out asap. Only you can stop dad please!"
What could have happened? You rush off to the bathroom to wash your face before opening the door.
You freeze watching the scene unfold.
Jihoon getting on his knees at the doorstep, bowing his head down in front of your seething father who's holding an umbrella, it's end pointed at him.
"Sir.", he calls your father calmly, bringing everyone's attention back to him.
"You must know what I have done to your daughter. I'm ready for whatever punishment you have for me."
He looks at you, as if his words are for you, "Beat me as much as you want, don't look at my face if it disgusts you but when your rage resides please hear me out. I won't leave until you listen to me. So if you want to get rid of me, you'll have to listen to me.", Jihoon gives a sad smile before grabbing the edge of the umbrella and resting it on his shoulder.
"Have you gone mad?", you scold him, "Get up."
He raises his hand to stop you from rushing towards him. He chooses to ignore your words, his gaze trained on your father.
"Are you contemplating, Sir?", he chortles, "Wasn't it bad enough, what I did to your daughter?"
You shake your head, closing your eyes. You know what Jihoon is doing, he's provoking your father and everyone else.
The rage that had subsided a bit, seems to reignite as your father tightens his grip on the object on his hand.
And you could only watch through it.
"She's the youngest of the household, we've raised her with love, pampered her to bits!"
"The last thing we want is to see her in tears that too on a day like this!"
"How dare you show your face here after breaking her heart in the worst way?"
And the words keep pouring in.
Jihoon is squeezing your arm into a tight grip, hissing in pain.
"What's your motive this time?", you ask while dabbing one of the bruises with disinfectant, particularly hard making him wince, "The Lee Jihoon, I know doesn't care about anyone except himself."
Jihoon's unwavering gaze does nothing to answer your queries and you refuse to meet his eyes.
"You can stay in my room for the night, leave by tomorrow morning, as early as possible."
Just as you get up to leave, he stands as well, blocking your path.
"I lost the insurance lawsuit case.", he says, searching for your eyes, "I ratted out my own clients."
"You came all the way here just to tell me this?"
He shakes his head down, with a small stretch of lips. When he looks up again you're shocked to see tears in his eyes.
"I got my memories back, Y/N.", his voice cracks, "All of them."
"Great.", you scoff in distaste, "I had already warned you to not make it an excuse to see me."
He kneels again, on both knees, "Would you please give me a chance to explain?"
You hate it to admit but you've never seen Jihoon this vulnerable. If anything, he's the type to carry pride and arrogance in his aura. He has never (his words) bowed to anyone and here he is doing it for the second time tonight.
"Jihoon, it doesn't matter anymore. You may not have loved me for even a moment, but I did, with all my heart. And I don't want to go through it all over again.", you say, urging him to be on his feet, "It won't change our past, but it has definitely changed the way I am going to perceive people now."
Jihoon lets out a sob and you freeze.
"I love you, Y/N.", he chokes out in words, as his sobs turn into cries, "That was what I was going to tell you on the day of the accident. I had been so ansty because I realised I was in love, I was going to come clean, I was going to confess."
"I just wanted a honesty in our relationship, you built it entirely around the other way. You didn't love me when we got together but I thought you did and this is the pressing wound, I have."
You don't let him speak further, after putting a very restless Jihoon to sleep on your bed, you ponder over a lot of things.
It's been over a month and the dynamics between you two has changed. When Jihoon begged and begged to give him a chance, to prove himself worthy of you, you denied at first. You had forgotten how persistent Jihoon could be, how convincing he can be.
"Our relationship will be on a trial basis. And there are rules.", you declare with a bored expression, "First, you can't tell anyone we're dating. Second, don't expect me to update you about anything, if I feel like you'll get to know, if not then you won't. Third, skinship is allowed only behind closed doors. You have six months and if within that I feel like you're worthy, we make it public or we part ways."
You give it a last try, to push his buttons and make him admit that he can't be bothered to do this. That he isn't the kind to work under conditions. You're sure that this is when he finally stops.
The corners of your lips twitch as you suppress your triumphant smile. By the way Jihoon stays silent, you're sure he's speechless. And it's just a matter of time he walks out, he walks away from your life.
"I agree with all of it." he says with sincerity, "For the following six months, I'll be the boyfriend, you want me to be. Mold me into anything, I'll take the shape of your like."
Your heart constricts, brain shots, stupid senses, you wanna scream. You swear you'll break him under your watch, it won't be a month and he'll be bailing out.
And Jihoon swears, he'll get you back, that this time, that he'll love you right.
It's Eunha's birthday and Seungkwan made you arrange a big event since she's gonna get proposed.
You can't stress how nervous you are even after trying your best to suit the taste of everything to be of Eunha's liking along with calming Seungkwan who's about to puke anytime because of his anxiety hitting the roofs.
And now your sister's crying, her now fiancé is crying but you're bawling. It's so beautiful, the entire scene that it makes you a bit too emotional, so you go out to breathe some fresh air and calm your nerves.
You feel a presence beside you and suddenly your head is being downed on a shoulder.
"I have kept your favourite chocolates in your purse. Have them to calm your nerves, your cycle date is approaching. I have restocked the supplies.", Jihoon says, "And made sure that no one is watching us now."
You tangle your arm with his and watch the stars in awe.
"One of your aunts kept asking me if I am single since you introduced me as your friend.", he says, leaning his head against yours.
"What did you say?"
"That I am taken and so in love."
Your heart flutters.
Jihoon has become calmer than he already was. He does everything you say, no questions asked. He waits for you inside his car every night to escort you when you're done for the day. He texts you frequently, though it's mostly monologue without any expectations of getting a reply.
He sleeps on the same bed if you ask him to, he takes the couch when you don't. There's always an ask of consent if he wants a kiss.
Nothing is out of scope, he'll bring you the moon if you want it.
"You look the prettiest tonight, you always do.", he kisses the top of your head, "Thanks for wearing the brooch, I bought you."
"Jihoon", you look up, your face perched on his shoulder blade and gazes meeting, "Why do you always look at me like that?"
"Like what?"
"Like you love me.", your hand slips into his and he encases it as if his life depends on it.
"I do love you.", comes his immediate assurance, "I may not use nicknames, not big on PDA and not be expressive on texts. But I love you and even though I was late to confess the last time I hope at some point I made you feel loved, made you see that guy who's usually not a fan of skinship initiated hugs and held hands, who hates amusement parks had planned every outing there because you like it, who doesn't like carrots either but picks them out of your plate so you don't have to feel guilty for throwing them."
Tears prick at the corner of your eyes and do his.
It's true. Now as well, Jihoon doesn't text 'I love you's, doesn't use nicknames, nor does he gushes over. He's still silent, acts of service loud enough as his love language.
Jihoon looks away, exhaling sharply, "I'm sorry, I started dating to rebound. I think I'll regret this as long as I'm alive."
"I'm on a mission and you're making it impossible to follow through."
It's snowing. Jihoon, as usual, waits for you to wrap things up. Today, he's standing in a corner, inside the venue as snow pours outside.
You are almost done with stuffs when you spot him. He smiles, eyes forming slits as you walk up to him.
His presence, you think, feels like a fresh breath in the hustle. You're just about to greet him when--
"Y/N!", you turn back to hear the yell of your name only to find one of your colleagues, Ahin, rushing towards you, "You forgot to take the inventory list."
Jihoon takes it as que to leave your side. He's about to turn but freezes when Ahin asks, "Who's he?"
As practiced, as he's been doing it for months, he's about to answer, "I'm her friend--"
"Boyfriend.", you cut him off, taking the papers from her hand, "This is Jihoon, my boyfriend."
Ahin is shocked, Jihoon goes stiff and you bite your lips to suppress your laugh. You know tomorrow's gonna be chaos at work.
As Jihoon crosses the threshold of your apartment, he's pressed against the closed door.
Your lips press on his with intensity while his hands tangle in your hair. It's a full makeout session and you're pulling him into the bedroom.
"Since when am I your boyfriend?", there's a tease in his tone as he looks up from between your legs, his chin glistening from your juices, "I thought we still have a month left?"
"Consider this as an early promotion.", you grab a fistful of his hair and push back his mouth to work on cunt, "Let's love now, Ji. Let's be together and happy."
"Let's love then.", he dives in, his tongue parting your folds and finding your clit. He circles it slowly, then sucks gently, coaxing a needy whimper from your lips.
He continues lavishing attention on your clit, his tongue alternating between rapid flicks and slow, sensual licks. One hand slides up to caress your breast, teasing your nipple gently. His other hand grips your hip, holding you steady as he pleasures you thoroughly.
"Ji, fuck!", your heads befalls on the pillows, eyes close shut.
His mouth is relentless, your pleasure his sole focus. He eats you out with abandon, his own hunger evident in the way he devours you. Your cries and whimpers only spur him on, his tongue never stopping its assault on your sensitive clit, "Fuck, you taste so good."
"Ji, can't hold back anymore", you're whimpering as the fisting on his hair tightens.
Upon hearing your breathy confession, Jihoon doubles his efforts, his tongue now moving in tight, rapid circles around your clit. He slips two fingers inside you, curling them just right to stimulate that perfect spot, "That's it, come for me. Wanna feel you fall apart on my tongue."
He can feel you tensing, your hips bucking against his face as you get closer to the edge. He growls around your sensitive flesh, the vibrations pushing you closer. He hooks his fingers deeper inside you, rubbing that spot mercilessly, "Now, Love now."
He continues to lick and suck, drawing out your orgasm until you're a quivering mess beneath him. Only then does he pull back, his chin glistening with your arousal. He climbs up your body, capturing your mouth in a deep, passionate kiss, letting you taste yourself on his lips.
He smiles against your lips feeling your fingers working on the button on his trouser.
"You'll have to leave early tomorrow morning," he says, grabbing both of your hands, "This was for you to have a sound sleep."
"But--"
"You can have me all you want tomorrow, after you return.", he is already descending down the bed to bring warm washcloth to clean you up, "Promise."
"Ji, next month, I'll be gone for a week."
Jihoon hums, as he cleans you up gently, "A destination wedding right?"
You hum sleepily, "Do you wanna join? We could extend the stay and use it as a break."
"I'll check my schedule and let you know. It's a good idea actually."
"I love you, Ji.", your drowsiness amuses Jihoon, as he watches you fall into slumber, "Wanna brainstorm cases with you for the rest of my life."
He presses a soft kiss on your forehead, listening to your soft snores, "And all I wanna do is be the best partner to you. I love you too, dearest darl+ing."
→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip.
#woozi x reader#lee jihoon#jihoon x reader#jihoon x y/n#woozi x you#woozi x y/n#jihoon x you#something about you#svt woozi#seventeen woozi#svt#seventeen#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#svt x y/n#seventeen x y/n#svt fluff#svt angst#svt smut#seventeen fluff#seventeen smut#seventeen angst#svt x you#woozi#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#lee jihoon x reader#woozi imagines#woozi smut#woozi angst
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Please listen carefully Please listen carefully I need you to read this
My name is Ahmad Al-Ashi, a 24-year-old young man from Gaza.
For years, I have been the sole provider for my family. I live with my mother, who is 68 years old and suffers from chronic illnesses that weigh heavily on both of us. Her condition requires daily care and constant medication, but we can barely afford enough food to survive, let alone the expensive medicines she desperately needs.
My own health is not much better. I suffer from liver disease, and my liver enzyme levels are extremely high, leaving me in constant pain every single day. This illness prevents me from working consistently, and sometimes I even struggle to help my mother with the simplest tasks.
As for our living conditions,we reside in a tent—if it can even be called that. It provides no protection from the scorching heat of summer or the freezing cold of winter. The severe inflation in Gaza has made even basic necessities unaffordable. Food has become a luxury, and medicine feels like an unattainable dream. Every day, we face a battle between hunger and illness, between hope and despair.
Despite all of this, I continue to fight, standing as best I can for my mother and my family, searching for any glimmer of hope that can help us overcome this harsh ordeal. Our story is not just one of pain; it is a plea to anyone who can offer help, to anyone with a compassionate heart who can be the reason we survive this nightmare.
We are in desperate need of someone to extend a helping hand because our lives are on the brink of collapse.
vetted by :@/90-ghost @bilal-salah0 This campaign #152 on Butterfly Effect Project vetted list!
Links to fundraiser accounts below Chuffed account uses dollars, (but does not accept Discover cards.) Gofundme uses the SEK currency. Conversion rates below
11 sek is $1 USD 22 sek is $2 USD 110 sek is $10 , USD 220 sek is $20 USD
Below are pictures from the camp for more evidence
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I'm bored, so answering all of them in one right here.
who is/are your comfort character(s)?
The entire cast of the Moomins (but especially Snufkin and Joxter)
lighter or matches?
Matches. I like the smell of them and I weirdly struggle with using a lighter.
do you leave the window open at night?
In summer when it's hot, yes. When it's cold? No.
which cryptyd being do you believe in?
I genuinely believe that ghosts could exist. Not saying they do exist, saying the could.
what color are your eyes?
Blue/green. It's hard to tell and seemingly changes with the lighting.
why did you do that?
What?
hair-ties or scrunchies?
Scrunchies are fun. :)
how many water bottles are in your room right now?
Five. All open, two empty.
which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?
Don't drink coffee. :/
would you slaughter the rich?
Yes. Let me maul the corpses of the rich.
favorite extracurricular activity?
Art of all sorts.
what kind of day is it?
In terms of weather? Cold. To the point where I skipped school to avoid frostbite. In terms of my mood? Weirdly contented. I feel properly at peace for the first time in a while.
when was the last time you ate?
'Bout five hours ago. (It's 20:00 rn)
do you love the smell of earth after it rains?
ABSOLUTELY. One of, if not, my favourite smells. I love it with all my heart and I apparently taught my parents the word for that smell. (petrichor)
are you a parent? (all answers qualify)
No.
can you drive?
Nope.
are you farsighted or nearsighted?
Genuinely don't know. Never cared to figure out what either of those would really entail.
what hair products do you use?
Like I pay attention to that.
imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?
No. Nail polish is the most vile smell on this horrid Earth filled with horrid smells.
do you say soda or pop?
Depends on which one whoever I'm speaking with says.
something you’ve kept since childhood?
This old plush I've had since I was a baby.
what type of person are you?
Introvert?
how do you feel about chilly weather?
Love it! That's my kind of weather. Even better is when there's a fog covering everything to the point of barely being visible. I like to go out into the woods near my house and pretend I'm a cryptid.
if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?
Stargazing.
perfume/body spray or lotion?
No?
a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?
Having a girlfriend/boyfriend. Had to replay that one alot to figure out I'm aroace..
about how many hours of sleep did you get?
Last night? 'Bout four.
do you wear a mask?
Nope.
how do you like your shower water?
Lukewarm at the hottest. Cold if I'm in the mood for it.
is there dishes in your room?
Yep. There's a bowl I forgot about earlier today.
what type of music keeps you grounded?
Folksy-type music. Especially the type I get wanderlust from.
do you have a favorite towel?
No? Do some people?
the last adventure you’ve been on?
Christmas. I had a bit of a breakdown when it was like 19:00 or smth, the day was a bit overwhelming. And my dad noticed, and for the next two hours we drove around the town.
is there a song you know every word to by heart?
A lot! To name a few: Flight of the Crows by Jhariah, Suffering by Amélie Farren, Shut Eye by Stealing Sheep, and Constellations by The Oh Hellos to name a few.
what’s your timezone?
GMT-5 (I think)
how many times have you changed your url?
Once
someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?
Nobody.
a soap bar that smells good?
You think I pay attention to that? When showering, I'm not even mildly present. I am fully dissociating.
do you use lip balm?
Nope.
did you have any snacks today?
Most of the food I had today was snack, minus bacon.
how do you take your coffee?
I don't drink coffee.
an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?
Ao3.
what’s your take on spicy foods?
Love 'em.
you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?
My mother.
can you remember what happened yesterday?
Not much of it.
favorite holiday film?
Don't really watch Holiday films.
what was the last message you sent?
Me confirming to my overbearing mother that I was still alive at school on Monday.
when did you first try an alcohol beverage?
Still underage.
can you skip rocks?
Yep.
can i tag you in random stuff?
PLEASE. I LOVE TO BE INCLUDED IN ANYTHING.
here’s weirder asks
who is/are your comfort character(s)?
lighter or matches?
do you leave the window open at night?
which cryptyd being do you believe in?
what color are your eyes?
why did you do that?
hair-ties or scrunchies?
how many water bottles are in your room right now?
which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?
would you slaughter the rich?
favorite extracurricular activity?
what kind of day is it?
when was the last time you ate?
do you love the smell of earth after it rains?
are you a parent? (all answers qualify)
can you drive?
are you farsighted or nearsighted?
what hair products do you use?
imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?
do you say soda or pop?
something you’ve kept since childhood?
what type of person are you?
how do you feel about chilly weather?
if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?
perfume/body spray or lotion?
a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?
about how many hours of sleep did you get?
do you wear a mask?
how do you like your shower water?
is there dishes in your room?
what type of music keeps you grounded?
do you have a favorite towel?
the last adventure you’ve been on?
is there a song you know every word to by heart?
what’s your timezone?
how many times have you changed your url?
someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?
a soap bar that smells good?
do you use lip balm?
did you have any snacks today?
how do you take your coffee?
an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?
what’s your take on spicy foods?
you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?
can you remember what happened yesterday?
favorite holiday film?
what was the last message you sent?
when did you first try an alcohol beverage?
can you skip rocks?
can i tag you in random stuff?
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hellen, how long are you going to let your cats continue suffering without a cat-sized castle/cat entertainment set? they're clearly desperate for a castle. look at poor mayhem. she craves a castle. she must have a tower to meow at. she's suffering without a crenelated wall to jump over and terrorize vice. and malice simply must have that tower to sit in where she can bat at anyone (beast or man) trying to approach her dominion.
Weirdly, I was just sitting while waiting on a case and daydreaming about kitty castle.
There's a couple reasons why I haven't tackled that yet. The first is that Mal and Vice don't want one. Neither of them are climbers, really. Malice likes to be inside soft things like bags and baskets but doesn't care to put in a lot of climbing to get to them. Vice doesn't mind some climbing but does NOT like to be contained. Mayhem is, as yet, a mystery in this regard.
The second issue is materials and weight. I try, as much as possible, for authenticity of materials on silly projects, mostly because things feel more believable when they are made of the things they look like they're made of. So a castle...means bricks. Shingles. Glass. And cats mean whatever materials I use have to be durable and cleanable. I could make faux bricks out of a lot of things but most of them aren't going to hold up to three adult cats mauling them, or will be prohibitively expensive or heavy.
So for now...no castle. At least not until I solve a lot of material problems.
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because today has been a Bizzyboy kick for me i decided to sketch my hcs about the height and builds of these guys. who knows if i draw them like this again or iterate upon the designs though.
Also calling out how horribly I dressed Grujaja. theres a reason i did it but its still foul XC
#ggg spoilers#great god grove#ggg hector#ggg capochin#ggg bizzyboys#please dont make me tag all the boys please i have a family#I feel like the default in my brain for Bizzyboys is pretty short and more on the fatter side personally#vibiano is in my headcanon normal “tall” drainfolk height range#patty is very very short#which is why Hector and Gruja being this tall in my designs makes me laugh because its just#“WHAT DID THEY FEED YOU. YALL TOO BIG. SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW.”#Hector did not earn his height at all with his canon diet. get short THIS instant.#Anyway the sole reason Grujaja isnt heavier set is because he's so anxious the amount of shaking he does counts as a fullbody workout daily#he also dresses like a super depressed ex military to the absolute suffering of Vibiano#also fun fact i love seeing which guys were struck w divine inspiration from sketch. alexei baby i knew what u looked like in my minds eye#the other designs have visible plotting lines and it hit alexei and my hand went “i got this boss”#and then i immediately lost the ability to draw#really funny to imagine Gruja joining this squad after last post causing capo to have a stroke#“WHY ARE YOU SO DAMN BIG.”#that was a kid he could toss and now if he even thinks about it gruja can send him across the fuckin grove#also making my stance on the cupo size war known despite my past joke about him cutting them off#anyyyywayyy enough rambles take my silly doodle headcanons
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Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.
#katniss everdeen#the hunger games trilogy#the hunger games#primrose everdeen#hunger games#batcavescolony reads the hunger games#suzanne collins#'now it seems i have become someone precious' NOW? GIRL BFFR you're their hunter girl#and this isn't negative just bffr girl#your WHOLE DISTRICT did the three finger salute that you yourself says means admiration thanks and goodbye to someone you love and on top is#old a rarely used. your WHOLE DISTRICT decided in that moment that they needed to bring back this sign of respect for YOU#...................................................................#idk why some people are thinking i mean this as negative i don't she is unreliable but its not intentional. like when Peeta heart stoped in#CF she doesn't know what Finnick is doing at first cus she doesn't know off the top of her head what cpr is. she also thinks Peeta after the#reaping is acting for the cameras. he isnt we dind out later his mom basically told him Katniss was gonna win and he would die. obviously#shes not doing it on purpose shes just for lack of better words uneducated? as in she doesn't know everything shes not omnipotent#so when Plutarch (? second games guy) shows her his mokingjay hiden watch shes like *wtf that's weird?* then the people traveling to#district 13 show her the mockingjay cookie and explains it and she then goes on the difference between his watch and their cookie#and why does eveyone act as if district 12 is as bad as the capital? they CANT help Katniss and Prim in the way you want. they cant give#them food. none of them have any! and im not putting iton Katniss but they hid they needed food so they could stay together. it sounds like#some of you are in this our world mentally of what people do after a loved one dies (brings food constantly checks on them etc) district 12#cant do that. they dont have food and they're all suffering. you cant give someone food when you have none to give. then theirs the fact#that peeta DID help. Peeta buring the bread and tossing some to her then taking a beating from his mom is a HUGE thing in the books.#he used his resources to help her like you all said someone should.#district 12 DID (rip) care about Katniss before the hunger games. why do you think she was allowed to hunt? or how her trades were good#these are the little ways 12 can shows Katniss they love her. but again Katniss doesn't see this and YES its because she had ptsd before the#hunger games as well. i swear some of you make it seem like d12 was all living a life of luxury and glaring down at Katniss.#other things that show Katniss is in hight standing with at least her people of d12 is her dad was known enough through d12 for peeta dad to#comment on his singing along with his commenting on her mom. also her mom is a healer in the community. yeah her parents arnt the top but#of d12 but they are/were definitely high staning in the Seam.
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"How does it feel to be helpless? Hows does it feel to know pain?! I watched my friends die in horror crying as they were all slain! I heard their final moments, calling their captain in vain! LOOK WHAT YOU TURNED ME INTO! Look what we have become! (enough) All of the pain that I've been through, (stop!) haven't I suffered enough? (stop!) You didn't stop when I begged you! Told me to close my heart! (you...) You said the world was dark (MONSTER!) DIDN'T YOU SAY THAT RUTHLESSNESS IS MERCY UPON OURSELVES?!"
And then the calm after the storm with the "next to my wife".... uuuugh, I love it! Probably one of my fave parts! What a masterpiece!
NEXT TO HIS WIFE, BITCH (FUCK POSEIDON)(DESERVED EVERYTHING)
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