#But I don’t feel like the oath was mentioned for no reason

[xdolls-crownx]

Re-listened to the newest V audio and I have a horrible feeling that we’re gonna end up fighting V in a legitimate death match but in some form of hand to hand combat because he brought it up

[lokissweater]

a good man

{bodyguard!kento nanami x rich girl f!reader}

summary: kento nanami has been your appointed bodyguard since the age of nineteen. his poised, calm, respectable mannerisms having you falling to your knees over him as he was completely different than any of the other boys in your life… for he was a man— taking care of your rowdy party girl behaviors and guiding you with the best advice and judgement he could possibly muster, and you loved him, gutted over the fact that he possibly only thought of you as a spoiled little brat who was useless and incompetent, as a client, and you wanting to be more than just that to him… except you were. for kento had already fallen over his knees for you.

warnings: MDNI. afab!reader, BRATTY AFFF RICH GIRL SPOILED READER she’s a little baddie o yes, LOWKEEEYYY brat tamer kento MEEOOOWWW, FLUUFFF GALLOOREE!!, slight angst!!, kento is SOOO SOOFTTT AND A LIL GENTLEMAANN, blowjob YUM, oral m receiving, mentions of doing the sex, deep throating, SEDUCTIVE AF READER BRO, cursing, mentions of alcohol and drinking, sexual themes, kento is older than reader by three years, mentions of reader having ‘pink cheeks’ is only to amplify and over-exaggerate feelings of embarrassment, shyness, and everything in between, and not to be taken literally! this is a work of fiction, and you can imagine many things for yourself :)

word count: 20.3k (i yap i fear)

authors note: I NEED A FUCKING MAN !!!! LIKE KENTO !!! RAAAAHDVSJSBSJSJ this BEAUTIFUL precious concept was a blend and mixy of multiple requests i got for sir nanami blended into one!! :,)) i hope i did you guys justice to those who requested and sent in ideas my loves !!! <3333 AND I HOPE YOU ALL LOVE ITTT JUST AS MUCH AS I DOOO AAHHH !!! I LOVE YOU ALL SO SO SO SOOO MUCHHH MWAAHHH !! <3333

“please don’t do that.”

you were undoubtedly the most defiant, stubborn girl kento had ever met.

“and why not?” you pouted. “it’s just for a little bit… and i can’t leave my friend hanging when she’s dealing with such a crisis! she needs my help.”

“your help.” kento repeated. “she needs your help going to a party…. at one in the morning.”

“it’s not a party it’s a small gathering—”

“y/n the hour is ungodly right now…” he sighed, rubbing his forehead. “i don’t believe this is very wise.”

you finished applying your blush and stepped back from your large vanity, quickly placing your brush back in it’s holder and grabbing your bottle of perfume, spritzing it.

“it’s fine ken!” you looked up and smiled. “i’ll just be gone for a little while i’ll be back before—”

“i’m sorry—” he held a palm up. “you’ll just be gone? darling, you realize i have to go with you.”

“but whyyy?” you mumbled, slouching dramatically and chucking your perfume bottle on your bed. “two hours! just give me two hours i promise i’ll be back—”

“i’m afraid not.”

“whyyyy!” you whined again, and kento only looked at you with a straight stoic face.

“because it’s my job to go with you and you know that.”

and you’d always been defiant and stubborn, kento having known you since you were a little girl as both his and your father were family friends for years, your upbringing a little different from his as your father was exponentially wealthy and owned various companies and properties, his parents just so happening to work for him and gain special bonds and camaraderie over the time of your growing lives.

though kento was only three years older than you— the gap nothing notable or too drastic, it sure as hell felt like it with how bratty and rebellious you were sometimes on a day to day basis that he had to bare witness of since the age of fourteen.

so why kento thought of you so much when you were the epitome of a spoiled princess… was a little unclear to him.

or maybe he did know exactly why— the reasoning transparently clear, to a fucking T actually… yet his pride and the oath he had set with your father the minute kento started pursuing his desired career after high school, hindered him from ever admitting anything to anyone. especially you.

and because he constantly ignored the way he felt, he was regrettably perplexed every time he was around you— which was literally every single second of every waking day since the moment he received his protection licensing… for kento was your bodyguard, hired by your father who saw his interests in technical protection training, and trusted no other man around his daughter other than kento himself, encouraging him to pursue it as a career in the promise that he would guarantee him a position— one with a pay that would have him set for the rest of his life so long as his precious little daughter was happy and safe.

and kento took the offer without so even as a twitch in his serious expression for two reasons.

the first was the obvious, to solidify proper employment for himself in the career that he’d always paid particular interest in ever since he was a kid— to make a man out of himself and work under prestigious and professional levels of security with someone, your father, who’s orders of authority were equivalent to a president, and a man he admired like no other and dreamed of owning a business that was as fruitful as his.

and the other… was to keep an eye on you.

you were reckless, bratty, naive, troublesome, silly, and never took absolutely anything seriously— all things that worried kento to no end anytime you so even managed to slip from his sharp attentive line of sight since the both of you were young.

and you escaping him happened a little more often than he’d like to admit.

like now.

“y/n—”

kento sharply turned upon hearing your snickering little giggles zooming past him and trailing from down the hall already, him swiftly retrieving his blazer that he had previously set on one of your lounge chairs and settling it over his arm, long and hasty steps striding out of your bedroom and down the hall, him peaking in several dark open doors and hallways of your ginormous mansion of a home on his way— the clicking of your heels and you still giggling serving as a guide for him to find you.

he sighed.

“darling, this isn’t going to change the fact that i still have to accompany you—”

kento rounded the corner and entered one of the many lounge area rooms your father used for business meetings and partnerships, your little head poking out from behind one of the large sofas with a disgruntled pouty look.

“says who?”

“says me.” he took the blazer from his arm and extended it, shaking it out a little and preparing to put it on. “and your father.”

you let out a tiny grumble, getting up off your knees and standing.

“but don’t you wanna go to sleep ken?”

“very much so.”

“so then go! i’m giving you permission heh!” you chirped, sending him a striking smile. “i won’t tell my father! or anyone! you deserve a good nights rest—”

“i’m going with you and that’s final.”

you threw your head back and groaned in frustration, kento finding your tantrum a little amusing as he chuckled and shrugged on his blazer.

“you want to go to this event, yes?”

you funnily slugged on over to his side with dragging steps, eyes to the floor. 

“mhm…”

“so then enough fighting and let’s go.” he stepped to the side and gently ushered you forward. “i’d like to be back before your father wakes up.”

you walked forward and out of the lounge room, the both of you beginning your journey down the hall and towards the grand staircase, kento following behind you as you still internally huffed and puffed about him coming along.

your refutes to kento joining you weren’t because you didn’t like him or anything like that… it was quite the opposite actually.

you were obsessed with that man.

“you scare my friends you know…”

the side of his lip quirked.

“do i?”

“mhm.”

“how so sweetheart?”

“i think it’s your face.” you turned your head around and looked behind you as you walked, hands wringing behind your back with a cute grin. “it’s so serious. and it might be because you’re always staring them down whenever they hang out with me.”

kento calmly walked ahead of you and stepped down a few steps, his hand automatically coming up to assist you and you taking it as you carefully descended down the steps, a gentle act he always did for you.

he pursed his lips. 

“i’m simply doing my job… but i suppose i could lay off a bit.”

you giggled. “no it’s okay ken! i agree. they just don’t know you like i do.”

ever since you practically met him you were obsessed— him being the most poised and respectful piece of hunk to ever grace your life, as kento was so unbelievably different from all of the other straight up boys in your life that deemed themselves to be men, when in reality they didn’t even come close to that whatsoever.

kento nanami was the definition of a man.

and out of everything that you’ve ever received on a silver platter with zero hesitation since technically birth… you wanted him the most.

except you were convinced he wasn’t obsessed with you like you were with him.

because the second kento became your bodyguard at the age of literal nineteen, there wasn’t ever a moment that you remember where he wasn’t with you and pulled to your side like a magnet— guarding and watching your every move and making sure that you were out of harms way no matter what, all things that were automatic and essentially part of the job description.

but you feared that it was just that.

that kento didn’t view you the way you viewed him… that you were just a client to him and that the reason he was always around was because he had to be, and not because he wanted to.

you feared that kento only saw you as some helpless spoiled girl who couldn’t do anything for herself and therefore always needed guidance, and you also feared that because he’d known you since you were little and became your bodyguard when you were sixteen, that he still saw you as a sixteen year old and not the full grown woman that you were now.

the thought was mortifying to you.

and you wondered if kento had ever thought about you as something more than just— a client? maybe.. maybe as a lover?

did he at least view you as a friend?

but more importantly, if he wasn’t your bodyguard… would he stay? 

kento assisted you down to the very last step as you shook away your thoughts, the both of you making your way out through the front glass double doors and over to his car in the open driveway, a sleek and shiny black luxury SUV that you always preferred to sit in rather than your own vehicle as his little passenger princess— always and forever and at times putting up a fight when your father would make you drive instead of kento, spouting some nonsense about how he didn’t want you to forget how to drive and become an incompetent girl.

and you’d each time just scoff and roll your eyes— your father always looking for ways to jab scoldings at you and fuss over every choice you’d make regardless of how big or small it was, believing you to be an incompetent girl anyways and you choosing to ignore him and scowl as you moved behind kento’s big buff frame to hide, him knowing to take over and speak for you whenever you did, as your father listened to him better than he did you ever since you were young.

kento in a way also scolded you often and fussed over your choices… but he was gentle. never raising his voice at you or overstepping any boundaries that made you feel like you were stupid and incapable of things, him always giving you the chance to fix it or refute with an open mind and heart to hear you out… and you loved kento. that was a given.

and your dramatic self deemed that the day kento yelled at you for the first time for whatever reason— was the day that you died.

kento smoothly smiled over what you said with closed lips and opened the car door for you, you getting in and pinching the skirt of your flowy mesh dress to readjust once you were seated, straightening it up over your legs as he rounded over and got in the drivers seat.

“i know a way you can lay off a bit so you don’t scare off my friends tonight ken!”

he started the engine and flickered on the high beams, your eyes squinting at the sudden brightness ahead of you.

“and that is..?”

you grinned and leaned over the center console, placing your elbow on it and propping your chin up with your palm, him looking at you expectantly.

so handsome.

“why don’t you stare at me instead of staring at them!”

kento breathed in as he looked away, steering around and out of the driveway while your close proximity and sweet expensive perfume wafted all around him— filling up his every system with everything that was wonderfully you as he tried hard not to let it show.

“i believe i already do just that.” he spoke. “it’s my job to watch you darling.”

“okay then watch me harder.”

he blinked, your wording somehow twinging a sense of provocativeness when it wasn’t anything like that at all, and he wanted to wash his brain out with holy water for thinking of something inappropriate like that with you.

but you leaned even closer, lips by his ear as he turned the steering wheel to make an easy left.

“you’re supposed to have eyes only for me right?”

kento swallowed.

“i’m supposed to have eyes everywhere.”

you playfully rolled your eyes and leaned back a bit. “okay… but maybe for tonight, just me!”

“i’m afraid if it’s just you i won’t be able to watch for any other signs of abnormality—”

“oh my god booo!” you huffed and plopped back down in your seat, arms crossing as you stared ahead. “you’re no fun…”

kento chuckled and lifted his arm, patting your head and you blushing before he placed his hand back on the gear shift, the only thing on your mind now was how much you wanted to stuff his big fingers in your mouth—

“the event is still the one on melrose street, correct?”

your eyes snapped in his direction. “huh? oh yes! yes it is.”

he pursed his lips, an uncertain look on his face as you faltered and furrowed your brows.

“what ken? what’s wrong?”

“is it the same host and organization as last time?”

“umm…” you pulled your phone out from your purse and scrolled to the initial invite you had received through a friend, perfectly manicured nails tapping away. “uh huh! i’m pretty sure… how come?”

“i don’t think it’d be very wise to go… you got extremely inebriated the last time we went.”

you snorted and waved him off. “that’s because it was my friends birthday ken. i was celebrating!”

“you barfed in a bush as soon as we got home.”

“part of the experience!”

kento shook his head and sighed through his nose, a small smile on his face as he peaked over at you from the side.

“rowdy little girl.”

little girl.

and you felt an unpleasant tug at your heart, you pursing your lips and wanting to defy what he called you.

“i was fine after though, was i not?”

you suddenly grabbed his hand and dropped it down on your exposed thigh, his rough hand making contact with your skin as he accidentally jerked the steering wheel and looked at you with bewildered eyes, you only throwing your head back and laughing.

“what?” you spoke in between giggles. “i’m cold! and your hand’s so warm—”

“honey—”

“your job is to take care of me right?” you sweetly smiled, and he felt a flutter of familiar yet confusing affection swirl up in his chest at the sight. “and you’re doing just that!”

kento cleared his throat and nodded, hand staying on your thigh and you giddy on the inside as he held it.

“just know that i have a blanket in the back in case my hand doesn’t suffice.” he mentioned, pulling up to a gated community. “the weather is a bit colder these days.”

your eyes softened, staring at the side of his chiseled jaw and face as he exchanged a few words with the security guard at the front, flashing his ID before the guard gave him the all clear and muttered something over his walkie talkie, the gates slowing sliding open as a result.

“why do you have a blanket in the back ken?” you asked softly and looked down, the tip of your index finger tracing over the prominent veins on the back of his hand.

“for you.” he replied. “you get cold frequently.”

you grinned.

“awww you remembered!—”

you unbuckled your seatbelt, jumped up from your seat, and flung your arms around his neck and practically stuffed his cheek up against your chest as you gushed, kento’s eyes blinking wide eyed and cheeks fucking flaring as he tried to keep steady hands on the wheel and not swerve into the garbage bins in front of the designated mansion, music already blaring through and seeping through the vents of the car as he fumbled to shift the gear into park— stiffening the hell out of his neck and not daring to turn his head even the slightest in your direction in fear of facing your breasts head on.

“i— i appreciate the sentiment sweetheart—”

you pulled back a tiny bit, your arms still tightly locked around his neck but giving him enough space to turn his head to look up at you now, your twinkling hyper eyes shining even through the darkness of the car, kento almost forgetting about the close proximity between the two of you entirely, and also almost forgetting about how this was— regrettably… considered to be inappropriate.

he was your bodyguard, he was supposed to protect you, not think about the way your perfect smile right now was so incredibly soul crushing and doing it in just the right way too— suffocating his entire being as he tried hard again, in real time, to kick those disrespectful thoughts to the back of his mind and focus on what he was meant to be doing and thinking… all of which pertained to his guidance for you, and your safety, most of all.

but you were beautiful. 

there was no denying that.

“you know me best out of anyone ken.”

and he did. he truly truly did.

but to kento, you were that forbidden fruit, cast away up into the highest of branches and dangling off of the tallest most unreachable tree of all— glimmering against the sun, magnificent… waiting to be picked by the person who dared to and claim it as their own without a single worry of the troubles that came with ravishing it.

but claiming and ravishing that forbidden fruit definitely came with it’s dire consequences, and kento nanami was an honorable man. 

if he were to give in to his pulsing desires for you, desires that he couldn’t even exactly make sense of as he continued to manifest total and utter blockage in his mind to prevent those thoughts from seeping through, not only would he deal with the embarrassing repercussions with your father— his boss, but inevitably drag you down with him too, as he knew your father has always been rather harsh with you.

and you didn’t deserve to be dragged down just because he couldn’t control his emotions.

you frowned, tilting your head as you assessed kento’s strange far off look.

“ken?” you asked. “kenny ken?”

“eh?” he blinked rapidly. “oh i’m sorry y/n. i was… thinking.”

“thinking?” 

you let him go and sat back in your seat, the warmth from your arms dissipating and the goosebumps around his neck prominent now by the chilliness of the car.

“thinking about what?” you quipped, smiling again. “about meee?”

night and day.

“i’m afraid not.” he switched off the ignition and held the keys in his hand. “more about how you should be at home and in bed and most definitely not here.”

you pouted, slumping in your seat as you watched him get out of the car and walk over to your side, opening your door for you and offering a hand for you to take.

“but ken i’m helping a friend.” you took his hand and carefully stepped out, him closing the door behind you as you began walking up the sidewalk with kento following close behind you, the car beeping and flashing its lights to signify he had locked it.

“honey, your friend is a grown woman.” you both walked up the steps and continued down the long wide driveway, other guests traveling alongside you towards the mansion. “she doesn’t need moral support from you to attend an event.”

“yeah and i don’t need a bodyguard for every little thing i do, do i?” you countered, slowing down your steps a little and nudging your shoulder with his. “hm?”

he gave you a deadpanned look.

“actually, you do.”

you scoffed. “no i do not.”

the two of you entered through the grand entrance— doors already open and with a set of security guards on each side as you passed them, kento’s already alert senses amplified now that you both were in an unpredictable loud environment such as this, and with way too many people for kento to keep track of besides yourself as he scanned the area, ticking the usual and automatic tiny boxes in his head that indicated the area was alright for the time being.

“if my friend is such a grown woman, then so am i!” you yelled over the music as you walked through the mansion to get to the pool area outside, passing by several caterers and butlers with small appetizer dishes on silver trays or champagne glasses, you taking one as your gaze switched between person to person to see if you could try and find anyone you recognized.

kento shook his head a little.

contrary to your popular belief, you never acted like a grown woman sometimes— constantly rebellious and spontaneous with no hesitations to do anything remotely reckless… and that worried him to absolutely no end as he was living in constant stress over something happening to you— something that he could easily prevent and steer you away from because that’s what he was fucking there for.

but you were always against it, and he didn’t know why when it was simply just protection.

upon entering the pool area, your eyes lit up at the rowdy scene before you— party guests jumping into the pool in full fledged clothing or throwing each other in, the bar at the end of the backyard lively and busy with multiple individuals already drunk off of their minds as they clumsily passed by you and nearly tumbled you over, kento each time quick to grab your shoulders and gently pull you away so they’d just about miss you and continue on.

and the minute he caught sight of your group of friends off to the side of the bubbling jacuzzi right before you did, every single one of them already inebriated and rambunctious, he knew he was in for a night of chasing you around and getting you to sober up a little to refrain yourself from running across the lawn in only your undergarments like the last party you both attended.

“y/n! hi!” one of your friends slightly slurred, the one with the ‘crisis’, reaching behind her to grab a red solo cup of god knows what and passing it to you. “here! i just got some from the kitchen!”

“what is it?” you laughed, on the verge of placing the brim to your lips when kento suddenly nudged you, gently prying it away from your fingers and lifting it up to his nose for inspection, you playfully rolling your eyes as you turned back to your friend.

“dunno!” she shrugged, flashing you a wobbly grin. “it’s a mix of tequila aaanddd… cranberry tonic! yeah!”

“smells awfully strong.” kento muttered in your ear, passing the cup back to you. “just moderate your intake.”

“okay dad.” you mocked, the little side smile on your face never failing to deactivate any further scoldings from him about how you shouldn’t drink that mix and maybe get something else, him deciding to just let you have fun regardless of the work he was about to be put through… as it was hard for kento to say no to you at times anyways.

you brought the rim back to your lips and took a sip, your face immediately scrunching up and gagging.

“the fuck is this?” you placed a hand over your mouth. “tastes nothing like cranberry and just straight vodka—”

you ended up drinking the entire cup and two more fills after that, kento each time gently advising you not to and that you’d had enough, but you only pouting and bratty and defying him with every attempt he made at pulling the drink away from you, a water bottle in hand that he’d snagged from one of the coolers as he swiftly moved through the twists and turns of the crowd to stay caught up with you, a skill he was an expert at at this point considering how often you disappeared from his line of sight.

“sweetheart please—” kento caught you by the waist just as you were about to literally jump in the pool, you giggling and hiccuping as he dragged you away. “let’s take a seat for a moment alright? you need to drink water.” 

“what i need is a teeny weeny kiss from you ken!”

he faltered, eyes dropping to the ground as he continued to half drag and half carry your body to a nearby table away from the commotion by the pool, setting you down on a chair.

“you need water.” he pushed as he knelt down on a knee in front of you, unscrewing the cap. “and i’m forbidding you from attending any events like this for a month.”

“a month?!” you whined, head dramatically falling back in desperation. “but why? what did i do?!”

“i told you to moderate your intake.” he gently grabbed your jaw and brought the water bottle to your lips, carefully holding it up for you to drink. “you were just about to jump in the pool darling and ruin your dress.”

lowering the bottle, your cheeks cutely puffed up with water as you shook your head side to side.

you swallowed. “lies. i was simply walking!”

he fixed the strap of your dress that was halfway sliding off, pulling it back over your shoulder.

“yes into the pool.” he brought the water bottle back to your lips and you drank some more before he lowered it again. “you need to be more careful y/n.”

you pouted. “are you mad at me ken?”

“not mad just quite stressed—”

“pull my dress up and spank me then.”

kento slapped a hand over his eyes and shook his head, cheeks buzzing pink at your ludicrous statement.

“don’t say things like that honey.”

“and why not?” you tilted your head, pearly white teeth glimmering against the warm lights of the backyard as he dropped his hand. “thought you loved me.”

“please sober up.” he breathed out exhaustedly, heart hammering against his fucking chest as he made you drink water again. “before you say something silly again—”

you abruptly pulled back and a few droplets of water dribbled down your chin, kento quick to grab the handkerchief in his suit to pat you dry as you narrowed your eyes.

“you think loving me is silly?” you muttered, a little slur at the end of your sentence.

“of course not darling.” he spoke softly, placing the handkerchief down on the table behind you. “the other thing you said was silly—”

“what— spanking me?” you lit up again. “but it’s hot. and i want it. you should do it once we get to the car—”

kento slapped a hand over your mouth this time, wide frantic eyes looking around to see if anyone had heard your loud lewd blabbering, his face absolutely fucking red at this point as he tried not to vividly imagine what you had just said… and pathetically failing at it too.

“enough. we’re going home. you have brunch with the monroe’s tomorrow.”

“nuh uh!”

you pulled his hand away from your mouth and gripped the edges of your chair, trying to cement yourself to it as he wrapped his arms around your body and pulled and tugged, you laughing when he’d manage to of course— lift you up… but the chair along with it as well.

“let go please.”

“nope!”

“i said let go y/n.”

“if you give me a kiss!”

kento put you back down and sighed.

“you are unbelievably inebriated.”

“and you are unbelievably handsome.” you cheesed as you got closer, your nose brushing against his and kento’s breath catching in his throat, stiffening up.

“darling you don’t know what you’re saying—”

“yes i do.” you spoke, endearingly nudging your nose softly with his and kento’s eyes warming at the act. “you’re gods favorite.”

hopeless hopeless girl…

his eyes sinfully flickered down to your pretty lips, plushy and delightful as they perfectly stretched in such a way to form a striking smile that always sent men to their knees wherever you both went, him baring witness to it all as your bodyguard… and him included— falling to his knees over you.

for kento was just as hopeless as you.

but he was better at ignoring it until it became this puzzling blur in his brain that confused the ever living shit out of him.

“let’s go home.”

his breath fanned against your lips and you softly shook your head.

“kiss me then we’ll go.”

kento’s forehead fell against yours, eyes closing in borderline pain as his big hands came up to cup your cheeks, your own eyes loopily widening with overactive exciting thoughts over what was about to transpire.

if he was about to kiss you… could this mean he didn’t view you as just a client? as a little girl? but a woman?

was he considering it? did you have a chance? was he actually about to fucking kiss you?—

kento sharply breathed in and turned your head slightly to the side, planting his lips hard on your cheek and him unmoving for a moment, you still wide eyed and shocked as your cheek mushed up against the force of his mouth.

he pulled back with a smack! and stood, hand extending out for you to take.

“ready now?”

your fingers slowly came up to the side of your face in a complete daze, because though it wasn’t a full blown kiss, the linger of his lips was still there even after the gesture was long over, your little cheek tingling and warm.

you nodded, taking his hand and attempting to stand but reeling over as you did, your head in complete drunken disarray as kento’s arms quickly shot out and caught you from falling face first on the ground.

“i can’t—” you giggled, hiccuping between each laugh. “i can’t walk ken. and my feet hurt.”

“i’m aware.” he sighed, sitting you back down on the chair and kneeling again, grabbing your ankle.

“what are you doing?” you asked, watching the way he propped up your foot and tugged at the clasp on your heels, carefully sliding it off and beginning to do the same with the other.

“you’re in pain, yes?” he slipped your other heel off and stood, placing your heels on a nearby table before positioning himself next to you, sliding a hand under your knees. “put your arms around my neck sweetheart.”

you did as told, your little heart singing happy drunken tunes over him being such a gentleman and taking care of you in the way that he was, you knowing in the morning you’d regret it and be embarrassed, but choosing to bask in the moment for the meantime and deal with the horrific hungover consequences later.

kento easily lifted you with only one fucking arm supporting you under your knees as you held on, his other hand grabbing your heels before weaving through the other tables and venturing out of the pool area, everybody else too inebriated to care or notice some big bulky man carrying you out through the backyard and inside the mansion, your head resting against his chest.

“are you alright?” he asked, taking a quick glance down at you as he reached the grand entrance to exit. “do you feel ill?”

“no i’m okay.” you smiled. “just thinking about the fact that you’re a cheater.”

he chuckled. “a cheater? in what way?”

kento carefully stepped down the steps and began his walk across the spacious lawn back to the car, you tightening your grip on his neck and wanting him to hold you like this forever.

“the deal was for a kiss.”

“and i gave you one.” he softly smiled, squeezing your thigh a little in emphasis.

“on the cheek!” you retorted. “i wanted one on the mouth.”

kento blushed furiously and looked away, trying to straighten himself up as he walked down the sidewalk with you in his arms.

“you didn’t specify darling.”

“yeaahhh right.” you mumbled, watching the lights of his car flash up ahead as it unlocked by the click of kento’s keys, him coming up to the passenger side and opening the door. “just say you’re repulsed by me.”

he scoffed. “you’re saying silly things again.”

“the proof is in the pudding.”

kento carefully bent and set you down on your seat, placing your heels next to you on the floor and straightening out the skirt of your dress for you. 

“the proof is that you’re drunk. i’m not making any moves like that when you’re not in the correct state of mind.”

you gasped and slapped a hand over your mouth. “are you saying you would have? if i was sober? did you bring my water with you? i need to drink it right now where is it—”

“dear god i did not say that.” he closed the door and came round to the other side, an amused little smile on his lips as he got in. “and i’m sorry but i left it behind.”

“kentooo!” you whined. “now how else are you supposed to kiss me?”

he shakily pressed the ‘on’ button for the ignition and looked away, your bold words and requests and moves serving as sheer torment to him as they one after the other kept being thrown at his face, him aware this is how you usually were anyways, but ten times unbelievably worse now that you were intoxicated.

and kento was growing weaker.

“i’m not supposed to do anything.” he backed out of the parking space and sped off. “and it’s nearly four in the morning y/n. you have brunch with the monroe’s at ten and you’re supposed to be up by eight.”

you groaned, head dropping back against the headrest as you crossed your arms. 

“i never wanted to go to that in the first place.” you muttered. “the monroe’s and their girl friends and whoever else is going are a bunch of boring bitches. all they talk about is what their daddies just bought them.”

the yearly monroe brunch was a way for you and the other daughters of your fathers various business partners to bond and maintain connections, some sort of peace treaty between them all so long as their little preppy daughters were kept satisfied and spoiled, your father forcing you to go every year and demanding you to keep friendships with them all, insisting that it would serve beneficial to him with their parents and help nourish the business even more than it already was.

you genuinely liked the monroe daughters and the rest of the girls at first, sixteen year old you seeking their validation and acceptance for years and constantly following after every little thing that they did, afraid of slipping up and landing in their rotten graces as soon as you did anything that would upset them… until they started badmouthing kento.

after that you didn’t give a fuck. 

because anyone that was so willing as to talk bad about such a respectful and kind man as kento to you, was someone who immediately feel in your rotten graces, each and every one of them doing so the minute they started calling him weird for constantly following you around, putting him down for it and saying he should find something better to do than be your bodyguard, and that you didn’t need such high class protection and deeming it unnecessary.

whether they were jealous of the fact that you had a bodyguard and they didn’t was mystery to you, but ever since that day, you despised the yearly monroe brunch, you now aware of who they truly were and realized how blind you were to it just because you were seeking their validation— wanting nothing to do with them from that point forward and begging your father to just let you skip out and that they were better off without you there anyways.

but he never listened.

kento laughed, nodding curtly over what you said. “although true, you still have to go honey.”

“i don’t know why my father can’t just piss off.” you sighed and looked out the window, cars zooming past you as he drove down the freeway. “i really don’t see the point in me going.”

“you’re an important asset.” he spoke. “all of the daughters coming together is tradition.”

“what— to sit there and drink tea and eat muffins? stupidest tradition i’ve ever heard ken.”

he chuckled, reaching over to pat your thigh and your cheeks going pinky as he did so, your drunken mind still somehow clearly recalling when he had his warm hand on you earlier in the car prior to the party.

he went to retract his hand and you quickly stopped him, timidly placing it back on your thigh and settling your hand over his big one, the both of you nervously avoiding eye contact and choosing not to say anything.

kento understood wholeheartedly why you hated going to the monroe brunch so much, for he wasn’t particularly a fan of hearing them talk for hours about who’d they just dumped or what they’d just bought, and he sympathized with you— really, your father although a man he admired for his work ethic and sought after for his approval, was unrighteously stoic with you and always dismissed your thoughts and opinions, the fact saddening kento whenever he witnessed it first hand.

“you’ll be alright.” he spoke up quietly again, noticing the way you were dozing off a little in your seat. “it’s just for brunch. you won’t have to worry about seeing them again until next year.”

“you mean until the dinner party we’re hosting next week.” you sleepily muttered, eyes closed as both of your hands laid over his that was on your thigh, holding it almost as if you were afraid that kento would pull away, his eyes softening at the thought.

“ah, that’s right.” he pulled into your gated community, the security guard already recognizing kento and his car as he merely waved and pressed the button to open the gate, driving through once it did entirely. “i had forgotten.”

“mmm..” you hummed, and he smiled, facing the road again and turning the wheel with every curve and turn of your neighborhood, your dimly lit mansion coming into view eventually and him pulling up to park in your grandiose driveway next to you car, turning off the ignition.

you laid still and pretty in your seat, chest slowly rising and falling as you softly breathed through your nose, you in a drunken slumber as kento quietly got out of the car and went over to your side, opening your door.

“darling.” he whispered, shuffling an arm under your knees and the other on your back. “i need to carry you up, okay? hold onto me please.”

you mumbled incoherently and did so, your arms limply wrapping around his neck as he carried you out of the car and shut the door with a push from his leg, locking his car and the little horn going off again as he hoisted you up, walking up the stone path of your driveway and up to the grand double doors— one of your housekeeping staff already there holding the door open for you both, them also used to your late night partying and shenanigans.

“thank you.” he whispered gratefully as he passed, and they nodded, locking up the house behind you as kento continued on up the staircase and down the spacious hallway, his dress shoes clicking against the shiny flooring and echoing across the silence as he reached your bedroom.

he carefully set you down on your bed once inside, you groggily rubbing your eyes as he stepped back and over to your large vanity, rummaging through your things and drawers while knocking a few nail polishes and perfumes over— various clatterings and kento cursing under his breath over the noise, it making you sleepily giggle.

“what are you looking for ken?” you whispered, one of your eyes tiredly peeking open.

“your— ah… i’m afraid i can’t remember what it’s called—”

he gestured to his face. “you remove your makeup with it sweetheart.”

you closed your eye again. “oh my wipes..? they’re in the bottom drawer to your left.”

he opened the corresponding drawer and reached in, taking out your makeup remover wipes and walking back over to you, peeling open the packing and sliding an individual white wipe out, you lifting a hand out to grab it but stopping once he moved it away from you.

you drowsily looked up at him, about to speak until he took your chin in between his fingers and tilted you up, him bending a bit and lifting his hand to wipe off your makeup, delicately removing it with precision as you tiredly let a small smile grow on your lips.

“i can do it ken it’s okay.”

he shook his head, you closing your eyes as he wiped off your mascara. “oh it’s alright you’re exhausted… and i’ve seen you do it quite a few times.”

you peaked your other eye open, his handsome face so unforgettable against the moonlight streaming through your balcony doors that your little sleepy heart started gushing over literally just who he was, your head leaning into his touch.

“kay…”

he finished wiping the rest of it off after a minute, tossing it into your little bin under your vanity desk before walking over to your walk-in closet and disappearing for a few moments, coming back out with one of your silk baby blue pajama sets in hand, offering it out to you.

“change please.” you sluggishly took the set from him and nodded. “i’ll be just outside—”

“no it’s okay.” you stood and reached for the hem of your dress. “you can stay—”

you pulled up your dress with no fucks given and kento’s eyes bulged open, immediately slapping a hand over his eyes and spinning around with his heart thumping on overdrive, the image of your perfect body adorned with a lacy white bra and panties a hard one to try and— unfortunately— forget for the sake of respecting your privacy and the most intimate parts of yourself.

you giggled and kento shook his head in desperation, placing a hand on his hip.

“don’t do things like that honey.” he scolded gently, a hand still over his eyes as you changed. “at least wait until i avert my attention—”

“you don’t wanna see?” you pouted, finishing by buttoning up your top and tugging at the sleeve of his suit for him to turn around. “it’s all for you ken.”

for— for—

oh dear god help him.

“it’s time to sleep.” he reached around you and pulled back the covers of your bed, you whining. “come on you have brunch with the monroe’s—”

you grumbled and climbed on, dropping yourself on the mattress and shuffling under your various fluffy blankets and sheets, him helping you in pulling them over you until they were settled comfortably by your chest.

“kento.”

“hm?” he hummed, still fiddling with your blankets and basically tucking you in, you finding it incredibly sweet.

“thank you for always taking care of me.”

he stopped, eyes flickering to yours before a soft close lipped smile spread across his face.

“of course darling.” he patted your head. “it’s what i’m here for.”

you knew what he was actually supposed to be there for was only for your protection— to only clock in when you went to events and clock out the second said event was over and done with and you were back home safe and sound.

except kento clocked in the moment your eyes opened for the day, and clocked out as soon as they closed again at night, him by your side through everything in your life and not just for special events, but making sure you had had enough to eat and that you weren’t sick after you spent the day out without a jacket (much to his pestering), that you finished your homework when you were in school and helped you with it as best as he could, and that he was your shoulder to cry on whenever your father yelled at you over something idiotic again— all in all taking care of you like you thought a lover would do for their most treasured thing.

and you hoped you were kento’s most treasured thing.

he was yours, after all.

“i like when you call me darling.” you murmured softly. “and honey. and sweetheart.”

kento swallowed and blushed, thankful that it was sort of dark in your room and that you couldn’t see how pink in the face he actually was over something so minimal.

“i’m glad.” he replied. “you’d let me know if it ever makes you uncomfortable correct?”

you quickly shook your head. “it never makes me uncomfortable ken… ever.”

he nodded, smiling in satisfaction.

“you know what does make me uncomfortable?”

he faltered, brows furrowing in concern.

“what honey?”

“the fact that you still haven’t kissed me on the lips—”

he sharply breathed in and leaned back to stand upright, you giggling and protesting as you flung your arms around his neck before he could, bringing him roughly back down to you and basically pulling him on top of you as kento let out a little oof at the force.

he planted his palms flat on your mattress, trying to lift himself up a bit but unable to due to the astronomical grip you had on him.

“y/n i’m crushing you let me—”

“so?”

“you won’t be able to properly breathe—”

“and? this is the way to go!”

kento laughed into your neck then, managing to lift himself up at least a little bit  to look at you.

“silly girl.” he murmured, and you grinned.

how stunning.

his eyes dangerously switched to your lips, and you noticed this, your heart skipping a small beat in your chest.

“ken.”

“yes?”

“what do you view me as.”

his gaze shifted and locked with yours, his brows pinching together.

“what do you mean honey?”

“like—” you pursed your lips, looking away to the side in embarrassment. “do you see me as just… a client? or just a friend? or like a little girl who doesn’t know how to do anything? or spoiled?”

“a client?” he repeated. “not at all that’s— an awfully wrong term for what you are.”

your head snapped in his direction.

“really?”

he sat up, sitting himself down on the edge of your bed next to you and you scooching over.

“you are spoiled.” he continued, chuckling once he saw the hopeful expression on your face fall and turn sour. “but it doesn’t mean that you’re incapable of doing things… i’ve never once thought of you as such.”

you hummed in acknowledgement, relieved a little.

“do you see me as a woman?” you asked softly.

he looked at you confusedly.

“well— of course. that’s what you are, aren’t you?”

“no i mean—” you sighed, struggling to get the words out as a blush rose to your cheeks. “like a woman. like the kind that makes you want to…”

you faltered, and he waited patiently for you to continue.

“like the kind of woman you’d want to kiss and things… like— like the kind you’d see yourself falling in love with… or am i just— a friend?”

kento froze.

were you still drunk?

“sweetheart it’s not wise to talk about things like this when you’re inebriated please rest—”

“i’m not!” you frantically shook your head. “i sobered up a long time ago…”

dear god.

he can’t answer your question. he can’t answer your question without straight up lying to you just so he can keep that boundary of respect he had for you and your father, to keep the vow kento had with him as your protector, as your guide…

but kento nanami wasn’t a liar.

and kento nanami loved you— a feeling he had idiotically mistaken for confusion when it was actually the plain and utter truth, for what he felt for you was clearer than anything else in his life, and absolutely nothing about it was ever confusing like he swore up and down before that it was.

he’d known…. he’d always known. and that’s perhaps why he took the bodyguard position in the first place without a fret to your father.

to stay by your side. 

to make sure you were safe… with him.

but did he dare?… did he dare to take the pretty forbidden fruit he had tried so hard for years to stay clear from? to leave it glimmering and healthy to flourish on its own no matter how badly he wanted to harvest it and claim for himself?

“i—”

he hesitated, your beady doe eyes looking at him so hopefully that it clenched his heart without mercy.

“i love you…” he spoke softly. “but i don’t think you being with me would do you justice.”

you blinked, unsure if you should take that positively or negatively—

“but i love you still… you know that.”

you looked at him.

“but love in what way?” you responded.

because love you in the way of a friend or family member sure, and you knew kento did at least that much and wouldn’t have spent so much time with you since the ages of eleven and fourteen if otherwise.

but did he love you?

“love… in the way that makes me want to kiss you.” he tugged at the watch on his wrist, referencing to what you had said before. “and love in the way that makes me want to give everything i have to you honey.”

because he has. he’s been.

“really?” you whispered, the wind completely knocked out of your lungs as he picked up his head to look at you, nodding.

kento opened his arms out for you then and you slowly pushed the covers off of you, crawling over and extending your arms to wrap around his abdomen, his around your shoulders while you tucked your face into his chest.

“but i don’t think you being with me would do you justice my love…” he repeated, and you frowned, already feeling your bottom lip wobble.

“why?”

“i have too much respect for you and your father.” he explained, caressing your hair through his fingers. “and i feel that i’m taking advantage of my position by being with you always… that i’m not giving you a chance to know what it’s like to be with someone else—”

“i don’t want anyone else.” you cut him off. “i don’t need to explore to figure that out ken.”

you looked up at him, cheek mushed up against him. “you’re with me always too… do you need a chance to know what it’s like to be with someone else?”

“no.” he shook his head. “no i absolutely do not.”

you giggled softly. “see? then why would i need one?”

he stared down at you softly, a warm smile that could kill millions if he so let it on his face, and you blushed. 

“i guess you’re right sweetheart.”

kento continued to run his big fingers through your hair, you dozing off a little at the soothing feeling.

“i don’t think your father will be very happy knowing i love you.”

you grumbled. “who cares what that old fart thinks—”

he snorted, lightly tapping your shoulder in a form of scolding, you laughing and holding him tighter.

“he doesn’t have to know for now…” you murmured. “and honestly i didn’t even know you loved me so i think we’re okay—”

“i’m sorry?” he blinked. “i thought i made it somewhat… clear?”

“no!” you countered. “you rejected every move i made ken… you had me basically begging for you.”

his brows pinched in guilt. “i’m sorry my love… i was doing it more for you than for me i— … i didn’t have any ill intent behind it.”

“it’s okay ken.” you smiled cutely, pulling back and propping yourself up by your palms on your mattress, leaning and planting a sweet kiss to his cheek. “though you could’ve just told me you had a begging kink i would’ve understood and begged you to put your fingers in my—”

kento’s eyes widened and he shut you up with a hand over your mouth, your muffled giggles seeping through as he shook his head.

“you have the most vulgar mouth.”

you took his wrist and brought it away, your lips coming next to his ear.

“do something about it then.”

he stilled.

“or do you want me to say what other things i want you to do to me?”

“enough you need to rest—” he placed his hands on your waist with the intent to pull you back and lay you down to sleep… but he just couldn’t do it, his grip shakily tightening instead.

“what i need…” you slid your hands agonizingly slow up his chest and around his broad shoulders, your lips brushing against his with hot steamy desperate breaths fanning across each others faces. “is to know what it’s like to have your fingers in my mouth ken…”

“darling please—”

“—i wanna lick all over them—”

he respects you... dear god kento respects you he— he couldn’t possibly indulge in—

“—so i can show you how good i can suck and choke on your cock—”

kento mushed your cheeks together with his fingers and swallowed your lips up, you letting out a little squeak of surprise as his other unoccupied arm locked around your waist and pulled you flush against him, him hungrily kissing you and gulping down your humming moans of satisfaction as you hurriedly swung a leg over his thighs, straddling him.

you disconnected from his lips and pulled back, taking his hand and bringing it up to your mouth as you pushed him down on the mattress with your unoccupied one, kento looking up at you so hot and bothered and astonished as you hovered over him, plump precious lips wrapping around his index and ring finger and sensually sliding it deeper and deeper in your mouth across your wet tongue.

“jesus sweetheart…” he breathed out, eyes entirely transfixed on the way your lips closed around his fingers entirely and sucked, your head pumping slowly and you delighted over how hard he felt underneath his slacks over something as just you sucking on his fingers.

“m’gonna suck your dick.” you spoke with a mouthful of his digits, and he sat up a little.

“my darling you don’t— you don’t have to do that it’s alright—”

you slid his fingers out of your mouth and pouted. “but i want to… unless you don’t want me to? or do you prefer someone else to do it—”

“what? stop that.” he shook his head, reaching up to tuck some of your hair behind your ear as you snickered, his hand coming down to cup your cheek. “i’m just worried about keeping you up… you have to get ready in a couple of hours.”

you shrugged, giving him a little grin.

“if it’s you and your big dick keeping me up i could care less.”

you swung your thighs off of his lap and stood momentarily, dropping down to your knees and positioning yourself in between his legs— kento’s rounded eyes and shaky breaths making you laugh a little as you reached for the buckle of his belt, tugging the clasp open and him helping you in slipping it off before reaching in his pants, a trembling but needy hand pulling out his thick cock and slowly pumping it.

kento would’ve never thought you’d be kneeling in between his legs and about to do something he’d only fleetingly thought of, the sinful images quickly grabbed by him before he could materialize them in his head any further and tossed in the trash without looking back, embarrassed and awkwardly flustered that he’d thought of such a thing when you were usually just sitting there on your vanity desk dolling yourself up, or simply speaking to him.

he would’ve never thought that the questions of being something more to you than just your bodyguard, would actually actualize itself, your pretty lips beginning to wrap around the tip of his cock and all he can think about is you and how many days he spent yearning for you, confusing it for uncertainty, and lying to himself before giving in to the fact that he did love you. 

and very much so.

to kento, it was a privilege to undergo this intimate experience given by gracious you, and he only wished he didn’t push it away for so many years and dismissed your obvious attempts.

for what was happening now, was heavenly compared to the fleeting thoughts he had tossed in the trash prior… and your pace was rapid, your deprived little mouth that had begged for him time and time again slurping the ever living soul out of him as he clenched his jaw to keep his moans in, afraid of your father or any of the other housekeeping staff hearing what was filthily happening inside your bedroom— his face crossed over in pleasurable shock at how messy and drooly you were all over his dick without even allowing yourself the chance to breathe as you sucked. 

“honey—” he heaved, swallowing hard as he gathered your hair up into a makeshift ponytail to keep it out of your face. “s—slow down or you’ll choke—”

you didn’t listen, your thighs clenching together to ease yourself a little as you sunk your mouth down and gagged, the tip of his cock lodged in the back of your throat so deliciously that he let out a string of rare curses from his lips.

you slurped back up and pulled off of his length with a pop, you sticking your tongue out and smiling too as you tapped his girthy dick on your tongue teasingly.

“but i want to choke ken…” you placed an open mouthed slutty kiss on the side. “and i’d like you to fuck my mouth too please—”

“shit—” he cleared his throat, his balls feeling awfully full and heavy as you parted your lips and took him in again. “but i could potentially harm you—”

you pulled off again. “kento i don’t care just use me or i’ll make you—”

he quickly gathered your soft hair again, leaned back on an elbow and shoved you back down, bucking his hips up and hitting your uvula so hard that you choked, eyes immediately watering and you moaning as he continued to buck his hips up and force you down, sloshing gurgling noises from you fueling his every being with ecstasy, throwing his head back and eyelids fluttering closed.

“you have such a dirty mouth sweetheart…” he grunted. “where did you learn that from? huh?”

you tried to respond, his relentless hip thrusting and filling your mouth up preventing you from getting anything out besides choking noises and spit, kento picking his head back up and looking at you with half lidded eyes.

“i hope you’re not speaking to other little dumb boys with it and teasing them the way you tease me…”

you tried to shake your head no and get it across that you absolutely were not— that you were physically repulsed by any other man making moves on you in your life because they were never him… but his big cock stuffing your throat was drowning out your every attempt so good that you couldn’t.

“no?” a little dazed smile played at his lips, his abdomen tightening and signifying that he was about to blow his entire pent up load in your mouth. “good honey… i don’t want you wasting your time.”

he bucked his hips up faster and forced your head down deeper, his panting and low grumbling moans making you fucking wild as you tried your best to take all of him and suck him, tears from how many times you gagged and choked trickling down your cheeks and you not giving a single fuck and pushing through, noticing that kento’s increased fidgeting and gasping was a signal that he was probably close.

and when you felt him loosen his grip on your hair, gently trying to pry you off so that he could cum somewhere else and not in your throat like the little gentlemen that he was, you slipped your mouth down again and held yourself firm, lips pumping up and down as you jerked him alongside, kento running a hand down the side of his cheek with eyes screwed tightly shut.

“darling i feel—” he quickly sat up, his expensive watch glistening against the moonlight as his hand fell over his heart. “i feel my release let me—”

he pushed at your shoulders gently and you refused, continuing to suck him off and drive him to the edge until a low gutting groan left his lips, you squeaking as he suddenly went feral and pushed the back of your head down and filled your throat up with his cum, sputtering and swallowing down as much as you could while he held you there.

“christ i’m sorry—” he let you go and you came off of him, gasping for air and with a mix of cum and drool seeping down your chin as you fell back on your ass, your chest moving erratically as you tried to catch your breath.

kento immediately stuffed his dick back in his pants and zipped it up, standing and placing his hands on your waist as he easily picked you up off the floor and sat you down next to him on the bed, concerned tumblings over your well being falling from his mouth as he moved your disheveled hair away from your face.

“honey i can’t tell you how sorry i am…” he dug into his blazer for his handkerchief, your tongue lapping up the excess drool and cum from your chin as his cheeks went red over you doing that, quickly stepping in and wiping off the rest for you.

“sorry for what ken?” you hummed, your voice a little hoarse and making kento feel guiltier as he sighed, placing the handkerchief down on your nightstand. 

“for abusing your throat y/n…” he spoke gently, ushering you to bed again as he pulled back the covers. “i wasn’t letting you breathe—”

“but i liked it.” you countered softly, crawling to your pillow and planting a tender little kiss to his cheek on your way, settling under the covers. “i asked you to use me baby… and you did just that! good job!”

kento playfully rolled his eyes and brought your blankets up to your chest. 

“yes but i could’ve done it in a better way.”

“in a better way likeee…?” you grinned cheekily. “like sex? well then you should’ve just asked ken i can take off my—”

you sat up and began unbuttoning your top, kento’s hands shooting out and stopping you midway as he flusteredly buttoned it back up, you laughing.

“please sweetheart you need to rest… it’s nearly six in the morning.” 

you groaned and plopped back down on your pillow. “just tell the monroe’s i’m sick. i’d rather be getting dicked down by you than drinking tea with them—”

“alright okay okay—” he brought the covers back up over you with an amused shy smile. “we’ll talk more about it tomorrow. at the monroe’s.”

you huffed and turned your back to him, kento chuckling before leaning over and placing a delicate lingering kiss on your temple, a slow sleepy smile crossing your face as you relished in the fact that he actually loved you… your fear of him seeing you as nothing more than just a spoiled brat quickly dissipating from the second he uttered his bashful but yet authentic confession to you.

you had been living in absolute worry and defiance and frustrating yourself when that wasn’t necessary at all— kento was just a gentlemen, a man, and his apprehensions for indulging in something more between the two of you were very real and valid and you understood… but you also didn’t care, your stubborn unruly (and spoiled…) personality and mind wanting nothing more than just kento.

and as long as you had him by your side, you didn’t care about anything else.

even when you had only gotten a total of a solid two hours of sleep before you had to wake up for brunch with the monroe’s, you didn’t care about that either, because kento was the one to wake you up with a soft hand down your back and gentle murmurs that slowly eased you awake, him delivering you a warm cup of hot chocolate for the morning because he knew you weren’t the biggest fan of coffee, and the brunch itself not seeming so bad too since you knew he would be there with you through the entire thing.

your newest biggest fear now though… was what your father would say once you told him. 

“are these alright for your hair miss y/n?”

you stopped applying your eyeshadow for a moment and turned your body from your bench seat, a tray of cute shiny pearled up bobby pins that you had requested a week prior sitting neat and ready for you, you looking up and smiling sweetly at your housekeeping staff.

“oh yes! these are beautiful thank you!”

she nodded. “do you need help putting these in? or are you okay?”

“i’m okay! if anything i’ll just ask kento hehe.”

she laughed softly, nodding again before placing the little tray down next to you on your vanity desk and turning to leave, passing by none other than kento on her way as he peaked through your door, giving your housekeeping staff a polite smile and allowing her to pass through first, making his way inside your bedroom once she left.

a cup of misty tea was carefully placed next to you on your desk, and you moved your eyeshadow brush away from your face again to see kento looking down at you with a kind grin, you instantly brightening up and scooching down on your seat to give him a little room to sit with you.

“you didn’t have to bring me this ken you gave me hot chocolate this morning!”

your voice was still a bit hoarse, and that’s precisely why he brought you hot tea to begin with, sighing softly through his nose as he sat down on the other side of your bench next to you.

“it’s for your throat honey.” you continued to buff out your eyeshadow, putting your brush away upon finishing and reaching up to fiddle with your bun, taking a few strands out for a more candid look. “how do you feel?”

“horny.”

kento went into a coughing fit and you laughed, his reactions to your ludicrousy always being a favorite of yours as you pecked his cheek in apology.

“sorry sorry—” you wiped the gloss you got on him off of his chiseled cheek, picking up your little tea cup after and taking a sip. “i mean it’s true i want your dick inside of me but—”

“darling.”

“okay!” you set your tea cup down, grumpily took some of your pearl bobby pins from the tray and started sticking them in your hair. “just say you don’t want to have sex with me it’s fine—”

“that is not what i’m saying whatsoever—”

“you refused to have sex with me last night and you’re doing it again right now mph!—”

he clasped a big hand over your mouth and pulled your head in, bringing his lips to your ear.

“there is nothing more i want than to be inside of you and split your warm little cunt open.”

your eyes blew out in shock.

“so enough or you won’t get anything.”

he turned your head to make you look at him directly.

“understood?”

you quickly nodded and he lowered his hand, grabbing one of yours and kissing the back of it before standing and walking to the door.

“your father wants you in the car with me in twenty minutes sweetheart. i’ll wait for you there.”

you watched him click the door shut behind him and you spun your head back around to face the mirror, shakily moving some strands away and quickly fanning yourself in attempts at calming the fuck down, completely thrown off course on what you were supposed to do next in your routine as you couldn’t even remember what you had just done.

because kento had a secret feral mouth that you had no idea of until now…

and you wanted to hear it again.

eventually you gathered yourself up and finished putting the rest of your bobby pin pearls in your hair, shuffling around in your room looking for your chiffon scarf and breathing out a sigh of relief once you caught sight of its pastel yellow fabric, it matching your summery dress and peeking from your bed as you snatched it and looped it around your upper arms, the fabric falling gracefully in a low curve behind you as you grabbed your clutch and made your way out the door.

you didn’t know what energy to exactly expect from the car ride as you trotted down your staircase and out to his car, but you were nonetheless still surprised to see that kento carried on like he didn’t just mutter in your ear that he wanted to rearrange your guts and for you to behave, you blinking at him and perplexed when he just went on about what things to pay attention to that the girls say because he knew your father would ask you about that certain topic later, not wanting you to get in trouble and an earful if you weren’t able to answer his questions about it.

and you were still perplexed upon arriving at the monroe’s estate— their place of living the only thing you really liked about the yearly brunches, as they lived in what looked like a fucking english regency palace instead of the plain modernized mansions you were accustomed to (including yours…), and you couldn’t help but feel a little jealous each year of the wonderful labyrinth the monroe’s had, an endless place of history and poise that your own home very much lacked.

but as beautiful as their estate was, it still didn’t make up for the absolute bitches that lived in it.

“ken if you turn this car around right now i will do absolutely anything you say and not go to any parties for two months instead of just one—”

he chuckled loudly and shook his head, rounding their grand water fountain that sat extravagantly in the center of their lawn outside, other sleek cars already parked in the front. 

“it’s just for a couple of hours honey.” he parked the car and turned off the ignition, unbuckling his seatbelt. “just indulge in their conversations for a while… and listen please. your father will ask about it later.”

kento shut the door as you unbuckled your seatbelt, him opening yours on the other side while offering a hand out for you to take, you gratefully doing so with a stoic dead look on your face as you kept your eyes locked to the grabble below.

“they don’t even like me.” you muttered, flashing a polite smile to the housekeeping staff that was waiting up ahead, walking up the steps. “the monroe’s and their girl friends don’t even like each other they’re all just a bunch of fake—”

“y/n!”

both of your heads shot up just as you entered the estate, the eldest of the monroe sisters trodding up to you with a smile.

“it’s good to see you!” her eyes shifted to kento. “and with nanami. of course.”

bitch.

“mhm! yup!” you exchanged polite hugs and stepped back. “are the rest of the girls here?”

“yes they just got here actually! they’re all out in the garden with my sisters i was just heading there now!”

“great! i’ll see myself then, you go on ahead.” you tightly smiled, and she shrugged, bidding you a ‘see you later’ before disappearing off into the depths of her home, you slowly turning around with a stressed out twitch in your eye but faltering when kento wasn’t behind you like you thought he was.

you spun around as your tried to look for him, gaze scanning the area to find him and stopping once you did, your brows furrowing in confusion upon seeing him at the other side of the corridor staring at something.

you slowly began walking down, eyes locked on what he was looking at and it making you stop in your tracks next to him once you got close enough to see.

the wall in front of you was littered with wedding photos of the monroe sisters parents and the generations before— the ceremony, cake cutting, pictures of their first dance, and singular portraits of various brides and grooms on their wedding days scattered about with smiles on their faces, all things kento was just staring at without any indication in his expression that could let you know as to what was going on in his head.

“ken?” you asked softly, and he looked to you.

“oh i’m sorry.” he glanced at his watch. “are you ready to head out into the garden?”

“y—yeah…” your eyes switched back to the wall ahead.

“you were looking at their wedding photos?” you smiled. “they’re cute huh? i look at them too every time we come.”

he nodded, placing a hand on your lower back to lead you away from the wall and towards the garden again. 

“i was only curious.” he spoke. “there’s an awful large amount of them.��

you snorted in agreement and continued walking, feeling like there was something he was thinking about and not telling you— you looking to the garden entrance ahead then deciding to take a peek at kento again through the corner of your eye, you suddenly finding him looking over his shoulder at the portraits still.

and your eyes softened.

you slowed down and reached up, gently turning his head from the portraits to you.

“what’s wrong ken?” you looked over at the wall and back to him. “why do you keep looking at the pictures?”

“oh— i didn’t realize.” he readjusted his yellow lensed sunglasses and continued ushering you on with a hand on your back. 

you frowned.

“ken you wouldn’t look at something for that long without any reasoning behind it…”

“it’s truly nothing.” he responded simply, the both of you entering the garden now and drawing nearer to the long table set up amidst a bed of roses and daisies, the rest of the girls beginning to take their seats. “enjoy your brunch darling.”

“no! but—”

“it’s alright go say hello—”

“i’d rather actually rot—”

“hello y/n!”

you stopped fidgeting and dropped your arms, another tight smile on your face as you greeted the youngest monroe sister from the table, deciding to ignore kento’s chuckling from behind you and walk up, taking a seat with the rest of them and looking over the extravagantly set up table for anything to stuff your face with— it filled with little pastries and appetizers from top to bottom, a pretty strawberry shortcake cake in the middle surrounded by a tier of cupcakes and scones, little baked sandwich platters, and a porcelain tea cup set at each of your designated seats to enjoy.

you lightened up a little over all of the cute details and selections, forgetting that the monroe’s always knew how to put on a lovely brunch for all of you every year as you extended an arm, grabbing the nearest tea pot and carefully pouring the steaming liquid in your cup.

“girls! just the other day my father bought me another set of those diamond jewels from the franziska’s!”

that’s why you’d always forget.

the rest of them gushed and looked around the table to the eldest monroe, her neck clad in a pretty diamond necklace with matching earrings and rings.

“i know right? i had lost my previous set while swimming in the lake and my staff couldn’t find them.”

“oh that happened to me once.” one of their girlfriends piped up. “it was an exclusive emerald set from europe… only one in the entire world made!”

the rest of the girls gasped and murmured.

“i had my staff looking in the lake all day and night for three days until one of them finally found it!”

“oh thank god!” the middle monroe sister breathed out. “i would’ve absolutely hated to lose those! especially since they’re a one of a kind!”

“mhm yup! and you know what else actually? just the other day i found out francis— you know the girl from the faltis family?”

the girls faces turned knowing and they eagerly nodded.

“i found out she was asking up and down various jewelry shops and makers for my emerald set!”

they all gasped.

“you’re kidding!”

“no! the girl either wanted to copy me or make the same exact set to still copy me.”

“oh! that sleazy—”

you completely tuned them out beyond this point, your brain literally pulsing with the stupidest shit you had ever come across to hearing in your life, choosing to sit there and enjoy the weather and pretty cherry blossoms around you as you ate a cranberry scone and thought about the things you wanted to do for the weekend.

it’s not like you were a total opposite from the rest of the girls.

you too liked jewels and pretty things, luxury branded vehicles and a little bit of gossip here and there.

but it was the way they talked about it and handled each thing was what aggravated you the most.

they were ungrateful, greedy, and bitchy— no other girl that was a loose connection from them allowed to have the same jewelry set as theirs, the same set of friends as theirs, or the same set of dresses for your monthly bashes and dinner parties as theirs, turning utterly nasty if they so even got a glance of someone else having the same thing as them.

all things that were pointless and unrighteous to be upset about.

and just for the sake of keeping your father from putting your head on a stick, you remained civil with them and refrained from wearing anything similar to theirs at an event if you knew they would be in attendance.

but it was easy, for your taste was completely different than the lot of them, and you preferred pearls anyway over any kind of diamond or emerald or sapphire jewel piece.

“oh! and you know what i heard?” another girl friend spoke up. “akio from the corvus family has a little crush on miss y/n over there!”

kento’s ears perked up.

you jumped upon hearing your name, the rest of the girls gushing and ‘ooing’ as they turned their attention to you.

“i’m sorry what? who?”

“akio!” she laughed. “that man is obsessed with you! he asks for you at every single gathering.”

akio? 

akio… akio…

“the one that looks like a toad?”

the girls laughed at your comment, covering their mouths or learning forward as you just blinked at them, unaware of how what you said was so funny.

“oh you’re too much!” the youngest monroe waved you off. “yes him! any time he sees any of us at an event he always asks if you’re there with us.”

“you know what yes!” the eldest exclaimed. “i heard he wanted to strike up a proposal with your father! i think he already did!”

you dropped the cupcake you were holding.

and kento froze.

“a— a— propo—”

“oh my god congratulations y/n!”

“lucky you!”

“oh a bride already!—”

you turned in your seat to look at kento, but he was looking the other way, an unreadable expression on his face.

you turned back to the girls.

“is this a rumor or it’s actually happening?” you asked. “i don’t want to get married to him!”

they laughed again.

“why not?! yes he’s ugly but that man is loaded. has money to last him and you entirely without having to work a day in your lives!”

your blood ran cold, because anything you knew that was ordered by your father, was bible.

a housekeeping kitchen staff came around then and refilled a few platters of pastries and appetizers.

“ahh you’re so fortunate y/n!” one of the girl friends gushed. “i’d love to be wed to a man with money like akio… i could care less what he looks like!”

“you can have him.” you quickly sputtered, and they laughed again. “no seriously i don’t want him take him please—”

“oh don’t be silly!” the youngest monroe sister waved you off. “akio wants you. he’s kind of creepy about it too.”

“why me?!” you whined. “i’ve only spoken to him a handful of times—”

“why don’t you ask him at the dinner party you’re hosting next week? i’m pretty sure he’s going!” another girl friend spoke up. “i have a feeling he’s gonna propose to you there.”

you propped your elbow up on the table and placed a hand on your forehead in misery, feeling like you were living in a total nightmare.

“i’d honestly rather go broke.”

they all burst out laughing again.

what the hell was so funny?

“you’re too much!” the middle monroe sister gasped. “just give him a chance! once you see all the things he can buy for you, you’ll change your mind. plus… i think it’d be nice to have a break from mr. nanami don’t you think?”

you picked your head up.

“…kento?”

“uh huh!” the eldest continued. “god that must be exhausting having him around watching over you like that… it’s like he’s babysitting you. must be tiresome for him too.”

babysitting?

“with you and akio’s marriage i’m sure he’ll dismiss nanami’s services, and you can go your separate ways finally!”

“but—”

“and mr. nanami sure is handsome too.” another girl piped up with a hushed voice. “he’ll find a rich girl to settle down with in no time—”

“oh that’d be so great!—”

you abruptly stood, the silverware and tea cups clattering as you did so, the rest of them falling silent.

“sorry. excuse me.” you mumbled, eyes casted downward as you moved around your chair and off to the side, the girls shrugging and uncaring as they proceeded to babble on about other nonsense as you walked ahead, further and further away from the table and the chattering and through the garden, passing by several other flower beds of orchards and sunflowers until you reached the little duck pond by the end of the garden.

you stopped and sighed, bitterly crossing your arms and damning your father for ever discussing something as serious as marriage without your consent, marrying you off basically, or even lacking giving you a god damn warning before you came to brunch today— you and your father both knowing how much of a blabber mouth all of the girls were and how much they fed off of gossip like that.

you felt like a fucking idiot.

and who the hell was akio exactly? you knew of him and kind of had an idea of what he looked like, but you never really paid attention whenever he came up to talk to you at events or parties, his face almost entirely blurry in your mind besides the obvious features he had that did in fact make him look like a damn toad.

and another thing that was obvious too, was how creepy he was.

the only thing the monroe’s shit talking got right.

“honey?”

you didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.

“hi ken.”

the rustling of grass filled the otherwise peaceful ambience as he stepped beside you, the both of you looking out ahead over the sparkling duck pond.

“are you alright?”

you nodded.

“i know you’re not alright i can see it.” he readjusted his lenses. “i’m assuming it has to do with the information the monroe’s told you?”

“i’m being married off ken.” you mumbled, eyes switching to him. “how are you so calm about this?”

“oh i’m not.” he spoke simply. “i’m quite agitated actually.”

you faltered, eyes falling down.

“i’ve always respected your father ever since we were young. and every choice he made with you i always agreed that it was what was best for you.”

you listened.

“but i can’t—” he paused. “… i can’t see how this is best for you. and i don’t know if it’s because i love you and i’m being selfish or if it actually��is what’s best for you… so my thinking is— adhered.”

“how can marrying me off like the fucking renaissance period be what’s best for me?” you muttered, and he chuckled softly.

“and i love you, kento.” you continued. “my thinking’s also messed up.”

he placed a hand on your lower back and gently nudged you to him, you complying and falling into his side, wrapping your arms around him.

“it’s your choice y/n.” he spoke softly. “i know akio isn’t… the greatest. but he’s qualified to be your husband.”

your eyes widened.

“what are you saying? what about— what about you?”

he looked down, a sad smile on his face.

“i’ll stay for as long as you need me sweetheart.”

the ducks fluttering wings from the pond ahead filled the silence, tranquil splashes of water that followed after their every move with little quacks and hoots.

“so you’re just gonna give me away.” you mumbled. “just like that. easy peasy. who cares—”

“no—”

“i want you to be my husband ken.”

he gave you a deadpanned look.

“darling don’t joke about things like that—”

“oh i’m not joking.” you separated from him, frustration swirling in your chest. “why is it always considered a joke to you when i talk about being with you?”

he paused, sighing a little through his nose.

“i feel incredibly lucky that a woman like you could envision a life with me.” he spoke. “but i’m also aware that i’m very… boring. i’d feel it wrong to tie you down to a life without excitement like the one you live now.”

kento slipped an arm around your waist and brought you back in again.

“akio seems to be more like you… maybe you could learn to get along.”

your lip began to wobble, and kento’s eyes softened. 

“sweethea—”

“i don’t care about any of that stuff.” you sniffled, wiping your cheeks. “you of all people should know this—”

“don’t cry please you’ll ruin your hard work—”

kento dug into his blazer and pulled out a little handkerchief, carefully patting down your face.

“yes i like to go out a lot but so what? it’s not something that’s a part of me it’s just something i like to do.”

you took the handkerchief from him and pressed it into the corner of your eye. 

“you’re a part of me ken… and i want a life with you, i’ve known since i was freaking sixteen. i don’t need it spelled out for me.”

kento swallowed.

he’d always admired how stubborn you were, because to him it meant a strong mind and an ambitious drive in contrast to the negative connotation that that word seemed to have— things that were absolutely who you were and why he fell in love with you in the first place, and why you were such a gem.

but he worried still that you’d regret it and change your mind.

that he wouldn’t be able to live up to your lifestyle and your wants and needs, and that you’d get bored of him… leaving in the end.

kento doesn’t think he could bare the thought of you leaving him, much like how he couldn’t bare the thought of you marrying akio either.

but if it meant what was best for you, then so be it… except it wasn’t. 

he was sure of it.

“you’re a part of me as well.” he murmured. “i’m sure you know that—”

“i don’t.” you grumbled, and he chuckled. “you’re always switching up on me with your rejections and then your confessions i’m confused—”

kento silenced you with a kiss to your lips, his big hands on either sides of your face as your eyes fluttered closed and you leaned into his built frame, your arms snaking around his neck and his bringing you closer by the waist as you tenderly deepened the kiss— soft lips smacking and moving with such love that it almost made you cry again.

“i’m sorry.” he pulled back, whispering against your lips. “it’s completely unfair to you—”

“s’okay ken.” you whispered back, the cutest smile he had even seen in his life on your face. “i’ll forgive you if you keep kissing me.”

“deal.”

your lips mushed up against each others once more, kento breathing you in and relishing in the feeling of your body pressed up against his, his hands slowly roaming around from your waist to your sides— still trying to be respectful of his hand placement until you took one of them and lowered it to your ass cheek with a squeeze, him laughing against your lips.

you were so silly.

silly and bright and spontaneous and beautiful, today another reminder from countless others with your frilly pastel yellow sundress and the pearls in your hair, your entity different from the rest of the women he’d come to know and thankful that he was lucky enough to have grown with you.

to have protected you. 

and the both of you were relieved to see that the monroe sisters and their girl friends didn’t seem to care where you two had ventured off to, for you didn’t know how long you were gone either as you approached the table again— the dessert piles, scones, and strawberry shortcake cake nearly nonexistent, you taking a seat again and secretly reapplying your lipgloss since kento had basically sucked it off of your face, your cheeks pinky and the butterflies in your stomach running rampant.

you were glad then that the monroe’s and their minions were such dim witted bitches too, because their level of self-absorption inhibited them from knowing or picking up on any clues of what could have transpired between you and kento in the garden, them immediately going to you upon arrival and chatting up a storm about mindless things again like you had never left the table to begin with.

but all you could think about was what you were going to tell you father about akio.

and you didn’t want to think about it honestly… because you knew there was a strong chance of you getting literally violent and landing yourself in deeper shit with him than ever before.

that didn’t matter either though if it meant being with kento… and for real this time. the thought of simply just him giving you the push that you needed to trudge up your grand staircase once you got home from brunch, kento trailing behind you and pleading with you to take a little breather before going in to speak with your father, but you absolutely done over the situation seeing as he only ever saw you as a thing and not his daughter if he was willing to marry you off like that.

“my love please relax—”

you stopped in front of your fathers study and knocked curtly, ignoring kento’s words.

“come in.”

you pushed down the handle and walked through, kento following close behind you and clicking the door closed as you stepped to the front of your fathers desk, your arms crossed.

“ah y/n. nanami.” he looked up from his documents, eyes switching between the two of you. “how was brunch with the monroe’s?”

“good.” you replied.

“was the food selection still as grandiose as always?” he looked back down at his paperwork.

“mhm.” you crossed your arms. “they had strawberry shortcake cake this year.”

he hummed. “the monroe’s always know how to put on a good event don’t they? for their daughters? and how are they by the w—”

“they’re fine.” you cut him off sharply. “but you know what isn’t fine?”

he eyed you.

“what?”

“that you’re marrying me off to akio—”

he sighed loudly and placed his documents flat on his desk, leaning forward and wringing his hands together to rest on the surface.

“he’s a good prospect.” he began. “he came up to me with some very impressive ideas about the future of my business, and also how much he was interested in you.”

you scoffed. “so this is what the arrangement is about? your business?”

“i thought you would be happy about this?” he extended his hands out lazily. “akio comes from a wealthy background. you’ll be taken care of in whatever you need and he’s qualified to take over my business once the time comes—”

hurt flashed across your face.

“why would you consider akio taking over your business and not your daughter?”

he laughed humorously, shuffling some papers about mindlessly on his desk.

“y/n you can’t possibly think that i’d consider you to take leadership over my business.”

“and why the hell not?”

his eyes narrowed.

“because you’re incompetent.” he spoke harshly. “you don’t know the meaning of responsibility, you’re stubborn, you’re spoiled, and all that you concern yourself with is parties and outings. you think i would allow you anywhere near my business?”

with each insult and jab that was thrown in your face, the blurrier and blurrier your vision got, you desperately trying to blink your tears back and put on a brave front, but finding it difficult when it was your own father that was dumbing you down to nothing.

“you’re not ready for anything like this and i don’t think you will ever be.” he stood up from his chair. “i’m thinking of what’s good for you and you’re being ungrateful yet again with your complaints—”

“sir with all due respect please try to see where she’s coming from.” kento interjected. “i’m sure she has the future of your business in her best interests, but marrying her off to someone she doesn’t know very well is upsetting her—”

“she’s never had any interest in the state of my business son you and i both know that—”

“sir she’s an extremely capable woman and independent i assure you her contribution to the business would serve prosperity—”

your father scoffed. “there is no prosperity with her. all she brings is disorder and foolery and i appreciate you trying to vouch for her but—”

“please if you’d just give her a chance—”

“i’d give you more of a chance over her—”

“then give the company to kento!” you yelled, the both of them snapping their heads to you and kento’s eyes widening. “i could care less what you think of me everything you told me isn’t new fucking information—”

“young lady language—”

“—i’m not here to try and convince you to give me the business that’s not what i’m here for.” you spat. “but don’t you dare stand there and say that i’ve never cared about the state of it when that’s bullshit.”

kento placed a hand on your shoulder and you shook it off.

“give the company to kento.” you repeated firmly. “if you give it to akio he’ll run your business to the ground and you know that.”

“and how would you know he isn’t qualified—”

“are you kidding?” you shook your head incredulously. “akio is a little dumb boy who goes to his daddy for help any chance he gets because he can’t do anything for himself. he puts on a show about how he’s this mature experienced man when he’s nothing but a joke.”

“i thought you said you barely knew him?” your father asked. “where is this information coming from?”

“the monroe sisters.” you spat. “they’re blabbermouths and their opinions are garbage, but their gossip is always truthful.”

it’s how you found out about the arranged proposal after all.

“i’m stubborn, i’m spoiled, i’m too stupid to handle anything for myself i’m helpless— fine. whatever you say but him?—”

you pointed to kento.

“he’s the most qualified for this position and you and i both know that.”

“y/n no—” kento tried to interject again, but you cut him off.

“he’s seen you handle the business since he was fourteen and knows it inside and out and just as much as you do. any task you’ve ever given him he’s gotten it done and more and i assure you that the business will flourish if you give it to him.”

you stepped forward, your father standing there with a neutral expression.

“believe it or not i care about what you worked so hard for to create, and i care about you, and regardless of what you think of me and the fact that you’ve shown me the complete opposite, it’d kill me to see akio ruin all of it.”

you wiped your cheeks and continued as you turned around, making your way to the other side of your father’s study. 

“kento’s a good man. everything will be in good hands with him.”

you threw open the door and stomped out.

“and i’m not marrying akio!—”

“y/n return at once—”

“sir i advise you to—”

your father and kento’s words drowned out the further down the hallway you got, tears spilling from your eyes now that you were away from it all as your heels hastily clicked against the shiny marble flooring, quiet sobs racking through your body.

you spouting repeatedly how you didn’t care what your father thought about you was a complete lie.

because you very much did care… you always have. and no matter how hard you tried to prove to him that you were capable of more than just parties and brunches and pearls and pretty dresses and shoes and cars, it was never enough. 

you were never enough.

“y/n—”

kento distantly burst out from your father’s study and quickly strode up to you, concern etched all over his face as you shook off your chiffon scarf and chucked it somewhere behind you in frustration. 

“my darling—” kento picked up the long piece of fabric and continued on after you. “my darling i’m so sorry—”

“i need to be alone ken.” you sobbed. “i’m sorry too i just need to be alone—”

“i refuse to leave—”

you slammed your bedroom door shut and kento picked up the pace, his eyes big in alarm at the sound of tumbling and thudding in your room as he stopped in front of your door, swinging it open to reveal you on the other side throwing your heels across the room along with several other pairs and things, your pretty pearls and jewels flying as he stood there in shock.

kento caught sight of you picking up your favorite porcelain flower vase amidst your rage to throw, him quickly stepping in and snatching it from you and fighting your thrashing as he held you to himself.

“kento stop it!—”

he placed the vase safely on your vanity desk and spun you around, his arms grabbing your shoulders tightly as he bent down to your level.

“sweetheart breathe please—” 

he hurriedly snagged off his cream colored blazer and tossed it off to the side, leaving him in his blue button up and suspenders as he rolled up his sleeves and placed his hands back on your shoulders.

“hey— it’s alright.” his hazel eyes frantically darted over every corner of your face, him snatching off his lenses now and tossing them. “it’s alright breathe for me y/n please—”

you could only sob, your mascara stained cheeks and heartbroken expression crumbling and ripping kento to pieces as he looked at you, his hands coming up to cup and caress your wet face.

“everything he said was the farthest thing from the truth don’t let it upset you like this—”

“no but he’s right he’s right!” you sobbed. “i’m useless i can’t do shit for myself and i’d probably be off somewhere dead in a ditch if it wasn’t for you—”

“do not say things like that—”

“kento you can’t be with me.”

he faltered. “i’m sorry?”

“you can’t be with me it’s embarrassing to be with me you’re better off with someone who’s capable and responsible like you i just bring you down—”

“stop that i’m serious i won’t ask again—”

“no kento you’re not listening!” you cried, your shoulders violently shaking. “you’re a good man. you’re such a good man and you’re way too good for me and i don’t deserve to be with you you can’t keep babysitting me like this—”

“how could you ever possibly say these things about yourself?” he shook his head. “how could you ever say that you’re too good for me when it’s the other way around?”

your eyes narrowed.

“no it’s not don’t give me that—”

“your father is full of shit.”

your mouth snapped shut.

kento never badmouthed your father no matter what it was, and he also never cussed so forceful and purposeful no matter the situation.

“he’s always been too hard on you and too stoic for reasons that i will never understand nor ever agree with.”

he leaned closer.

“do not upset yourself over the things he said any longer and do not worry about your marriage arrangement with akio.”

“ken—”

“do not think about the pearls you just threw over your balcony do not worry about anything— i will take care of it.”

“i—”

“i love you and i will take care of it.”

you continued to cry, letting your body slump wholly against his as he caught you and held you tight.

“please.. i beg you darling to believe me when i say that you are the most capable woman i know.” he spoke against your ear, his chest aching over your soft sobbing. “you’re witty and you’re intelligent and you’ve come so far simply because of who you are and the way you carry yourself. it’s a shame your father can’t see that.”

“no one can see that—”

“i can see it. everybody else can see it too and i’ve been around you all my life to testify for it.” 

you sniffled, burying your face in his neck.

“believe me my love…” he ran a soothing hand down your back. “you’re everything. you’re an asset. don’t let your father’s words take that away.”

you sniffled a little, standing there silent as your hiccups and sobs settled down gradually, your heart beating prominently against your ribs at kento’s sweet murmurings and affection, because though your fathers actions and decisions were bible, so were kento’s words.

he was a good man.

“thank you.” you mumbled, and he nodded, gently guiding you to your bed to sit.

“i’ll take care of you sweetheart.” he pulled back and placed a soft kiss to your lips. “i promise you.”

you smiled a little, a small warm gleam in your eyes as you sniffed and nodded.

“okay ken.”

words didn’t need to be said between the two of you to know the unconditional love you both had for each other, one that was born and bred and made a fact upon your lives crossing paths through fated connections, and strengthened from the day kento decided to be your bodyguard and protect you with everything that he had.

and words didn’t need to be said between the two of you as you both fell in each other’s soft embraces either, kissing with lingering hands and bated breaths as kento delicately laid you back on your bed after a moment of soft chattering, him making sure you were okay, and scattering hungry open mouthed kisses on your jaw and neck and your body language alone with your needy whines enough of an indicator to him that you needed all of him, just as much as he needed all of you, his calloused hands undressing you and worshipping your bare body and everything that you were.

skin to skin contact that was hot to the touch, your arms that barely reached around his broad built shoulders trembling as kento made love to you that night, foreheads resting against each others as he pumped slowly and intimately in and out from inside you, your gasps catching themselves in your throat and him moaning with every thrust and snap of his hips that sent you down a ditzy fucked out road that you never wanted to back track from.

and kento treated you like a delicate little pearl all while at the same time desperately marking and bruising you up with hickeys and bites, afraid from the start that he would accidentally cross the line and hurt you due to his size, but you reassuring him with your perfect smile and pretty face while whispering sweet nothings in his ear as he filled you full, him swallowing you whole and man handling you so much to the point where he had to have you biting down on his tie to keep you quiet while he fucked you senseless.

everything about it was meaningful and cherished and nothing like you’d ever experienced before in your life— a night you wanted to remember for as long as you lived and prayed that you got to repeat over and over again… with him.

with kento and kento only.

he was the only man capable of simmering down your tears and making you feel so much better about a situation as horrid as the one that transpired, and he was the only man that was capable of getting you to listen when you didn’t want to, an incredible talent in itself that spoke volumes in how much of a gentle and kind and reliable person he was… and you only hoped that you provided him with things of the same caliber.

and the thought of that only amplified upon you waking up to find that kento wasn’t next to you in your bed the next morning… when you clearly remembered falling asleep in his big arms the night before.

you slowly sat up, one tired eye peeking over at the vacant spot next you and around the room, finding nothing and honestly feeling a little down about his disappearance as you groggily got out of bed.

maybe he went to eat breakfast? or get a cup of coffee?

you continued on anyways with your morning and freshened up for the day, your legs nearly giving out and sore in the shower due to the pounding he gave you— skin tender and purple under the running water and you loving every mark, shrugging and getting ready quicker than normal so you could finally see kento downstairs to share a little smooch or two with him.

you zoomed through styling your hair and doing your makeup before spritzing a bit of perfume, not bothering to locate your phone before you opened the door to your bedroom and stepped out, bidding your usual good mornings to your housekeeping staff as you skipped down the grand staircase and over to the kitchen, a place he was usually at if not already with you in your room.

but he wasn’t there.

and you frowned.

where was he?

you spent a total of thirty minutes looking for kento— practically turning your mansion upside down and even sticking your head in rooms you had never stepped foot in before, your mind fucking confused and worried that you couldn’t locate him anywhere and that your staff didn’t even know where he was when you asked, for him doing something like this was completely unheard of.

upon going back upstairs, you speedily walked past your fathers study and stopped.

could he be in there…?

but your father was for sure in there, and you couldn’t stand the thought of speaking or even looking at him at the moment without fury clouding your judgement again.

but kento could be in there…

you took a deep breath and walked back to your fathers door, hesitantly knocking gently.

“come in.”

you pushed the door open and stepped in, closing it behind you before turning around and shoulders slumping when you didn’t spot him in here either.

dammit.

“good morning.” your father spoke. “what can i do for you? it’s rather early for you to be stopping by.”

“oh yeah sorry i just—” you played with the ends of your hair. “i was just looking for kento… i thought he might’ve been in here.”

he shook his head.

“he’s not. he left.”

you froze.

“he— what?”

“he left.” you father repeated. “nanami stepped down from the position of being your bodyguard earlier today. he left a couple of hours ago.”

what the fuck?

“i don’t—” you tightly gripped the table next to you, balancing yourself. “i don’t understand—”

“you’ll be assigned a new bodyguard within the next coming week—”

“did he say why?” you breathed out. “did he say anything at all?”

your fathers eyes scanned you.

“amongst various other things, he said he simply couldn’t fulfill that position anymore.”

“did you fire him?!”

he scoffed. “don’t be ridiculous y/n i would never do something like that to nanami. i tried to get him to reconsider.”

holy fucking shit.

kento quit? kento left? kento left you?

it didn’t make any sense. nothing about it made sense to you this— this wasn’t like him at all—

“like i said you’ll be assigned a new bodyguard soon i just need to finalize nanami’s paperwork—”

you swung open the door and ran out, your eyes already filling with tears as you pushed through your housekeeping staff and ignored their beckoning and calls, you bursting through your room and throwing everything around to try and find your phone through your heaving and panic.

why did he leave you? was it something you did?

did he finally realize you were nothing but a useless spoiled girl?

you hurriedly wiped your eyes and kept looking, transitioning from your bed over to your vanity desk and knocking over everything to try and find your stupid phone to call him, some of your expensive bottle of perfumes clattering and spilling and you not giving a rats ass about it as your tears increased in intensity, about to run out of your room and get in your car to literally drive around your fucking city to look for him until you snapped your head up.

a small yellow sticky note sat stuck to your mirror. 

you stopped, dropping the items you were holding and stepping closer— pulling the note from its position and bringing it in.

i’ll be in the garden waiting for you when you wake up.

kento.

you hiccuped and wiped your eyes again, kicking the clothes you had thrown about in search for your phone (that you still couldn’t find) as you hurriedly left your room and trudged down the hall, confusion and hurt suffocating your head over the information you had just learned about him and his leave, you reaching the bottom of your staircase and rounding through various hallways and lounge areas to get to the entry way of your little garden, one that wasn’t exaggeratingly massive like the monroe’s, but one that was a great size and that you loved with everything in you— various flowers and herbs planted by yours truly as you periodically took care of them from time to time.

and sure enough, as promised, kento was standing at the end of your garden, his back turned to you as he overlooked the acres of land your father owned that stretched beyond the premises of your rosey labyrinth, him dressed in a casual yet dressy tight long sleeve sweater and dress pants— a sight you weren’t used to seeing at all as you always saw him in a full blown suit everyday without fail.

kento heard the soft rustling of grass and he slightly turned, a soft smile stretching across his chiseled face until he caught sight of your tear stained cheeks and pissed off expression, his face dropping and brows pinching.

“honey what’s wrong?” he walked over to you and you glared. “why are you looking at me like that?”

“you quit.” you muttered, already annoyingly feeling your waterworks trigger again. “my father said you gave up your bodyguard position.”

“oh.” his shoulders relaxed, and his nonchalance only further pissed you off. “i did my love yes—”

“why.” you pushed. “why are you leaving i don’t— i don’t get it did i do something wrong? i—”

“what?” he shook his head and took your hands in his. “no dear god no you didn’t do anything.”

“then why are you leaving?” you sniffed, and kento wiped a stray tear from your cheek with his thumb.

“i told your father i love you.”

you stiffened.

“he wasn’t very pleased.” he continued. “i figured he wouldn’t be… but he didn’t make me step down from my position darling, i chose to do that.”

you blinked confusedly.

“but why?”

“i don’t want to be paid for something that i was born to do as your man.” he smiled warmly. “it didn’t feel right to me… and i don’t want to be labeled as that anymore either.”

he wiped away your remaining tears.

“i want to only be known as yours now. not your bodyguard or anything else in between.”

you were left speechless, unmoving and rigid at everything he was saying.

“however… your father did make me choose between you and the business.”

your brows furrowed, taken aback.

“the— the business?—”

kento nodded, a content smile still on his face.

“he was impressed by what you said yesterday sweetheart.” 

you scoffed. “what that his words were bullshit and that he doesn’t care about me—”

he laughed, little crinkles in the corners of his eyes as he shook his head.

“he was satisfied to see that you weren’t angry about not getting the company for yourself, but because he was going to give it away to someone who wasn’t qualified to maintain it.” 

you pursed your lips.

“he was offering it to me in exchange for letting you go. i refused immediately.”

your eyes shot up.

“kento no i— fuck—” you looked around exasperatedly. “this is your dream! this is everything you’ve ever wanted i feel horrible for taking that away i don’t—”

“sweetheart don’t be stupid.” he chuckled. “i thought i made it clear enough that you’re everything i’ve ever wanted… not some business. i don’t need any of that. just you.”

your eyes softened.

“are you sad at all?”

he shook his head and gently kissed your forehead.

“i’m the happiest i’ve ever been y/n.”

and that was the truest of truths.

kento was truly and incandescently happy, no longer tied down and restrained by his inner monologues of former idiotic confusion, or jugglings of what was best for you and whether you should be with him or not no longer standing in the way either as he finally welcomed the fact that yes— a woman as gracious and lively and stunning as you could indeed love a simple man like him, an absolute privilege and honor to have someone as special as you want a life with him in it that he just couldn’t understand how his feelings were ever considered confusing to start with.

for him thinking of nothing but you and his occupation as your protector and your guide, a job that he saw himself doing beside you until his very dying day, was all simply a mask of him thinking out the rest of his life with you in the form of work.

and it was so clear that he loved you. so much.

how could he not? how could the way he stared at the monroe’s generational wedding portraits and photographs, swapping their faces out with his and yours, and his constant weighings of ‘if she was mine’ and ‘does she actually feel the same way’ from before not already give away enough that he loved you?

but it was even clearer now, with him giving up the opportunity to build and nourish a reputable business like he’d always aspired to do, turning it down without so much as a blink because he wanted you and you only, not feeling an ounce of regret in his body and knowing that he never will.

kento was looking forward to spending the rest of his days with the woman that he’d always envisioned it with— the forbidden heavenly fruit that he had deemed impossible to reach and wrong to even try, him unknowing of the fact that that same glistening fruit sat dangling and waiting as it would only ever let itself be harvested and picked by him… for kento was the one who planted and had been nurturing it for as long as it could remember.

planted it… nurtured it… kept it safe.

kept you safe.

and funnily enough, another individual was also looking forward to seeing your life with kento unfold… your father— curious to see how exactly two opposites became compatible, and when it was that the two of you fell in love as it managed to wholeheartedly slip past his radar completely when most things didn’t.

had he really been this absent in your life?

… though regardless if he was or wasn’t, it was too late to dwell on it now, seeing as you were a grown woman and capable and your father was grateful that you at least had a companion with you through the many days he wasn’t, and an honorable man such as kento— taking care of you and guiding you through every step of your life when he didn’t even need to be asked, his willingness to do it and overlooking your reckless habits reading numbers to your father.

and even more so now as he leaned against his studies stone balcony ledge from above, it overlooking the entirety of your garden plus the acres of land he owned during the annual dinner party he put on for the business, kento sitting peacefully on a lawn chair with you in his lap while drinking glasses of sparkling champagne, soft echoing laughs and giggles heard from below as you enjoyed each others company away from the bustling crowds and nosy relatives.

it was a pleasing sight, to say the least.

and it was exactly why your father was going to give his business to kento when the time came, because when given the choice between gluttony and love, kento chose love.

he chose you.

“i’m thinking of planting tiger lilies soon.” you hummed, your head resting on kento’s shoulder as he delicately ran a hand down your back, sipping his champagne. “it’s almost their season… right?”

“i believe so, yes.” he nodded. “i think that’s a great idea.”

“thanks!” you cheesed, running the tip of your index finger absentmindedly over the rim of your glass. “will you help me? i need your big manly arms to carry the soil out from the flower shop tomorrow hehe.”

he chuckled, tracing his fingers gingerly over your upper arm. “i’ll pick it up for you in the morning sweetheart. don’t concern yourself with it.”

you smiled to yourself, cheeks warm as you pressed a kiss to his cheek in gratitude.

“i am concerned about something else though…”

his brows pinched, lowering the glass from his lips and looking at you in concern.

“what is it?”

“when we’re gonna pick our wedding date—”

kento laughed boastfully and shook his head, setting down his champagne glass on the little table next to him and settling his hand over your thigh, the material of your classy black dress smooth under his touch.

“you asked me this just last night my love.”

“okay so?” you grinned. “you don’t want me to be your precious wife? the birth giver of your offspring?—”

“i never said that—”

“because i could y’know.” you caressed his jaw with your thumb. “i could be your wife and be the mother of your children… isn’t that what you want?”

with all of his heart.

“it’s what i want at least.” you pouted, and kento smiled handsomely, the vision of you soaked in the rays of the setting sun before him a lethal one as he felt his heart rattle against his chest.

“me promising to take care of you has marriage included above all else my love.” he spoke gently. “you will be my bride someday, i assure you.”

you stared at him warmly, your cheek falling to rest against his as you placed your hand on his chest and over his white crisp button up.

“i also assure you that you’ll continue to be happy and protected, alright?” he squeezed your thigh. “just because i’m not your bodyguard anymore doesn’t mean my duties are done with.”

you nodded against him, the slight prickling cold wind brushing against your skin as the stunning sun continued to set.

“you’re a good man, ken.” you murmured. “and i love you.”

and that was another truest of truths.

because as he reiterated that same three worded phrase back to you and held you closer to his built frame, grabbing his blazer from the arm rest and draping it over your goose bumped filled shoulders, and with a tender kiss to your lips?

it was obvious that kento nanami was born and raised to be just that.

a good man.

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[danyseastar]

i think the biggest problem i have with the whole team discourse in f&b + hotd is that it isn’t just about which characters you like more/who you want to sit on the throne at that end; it’s that each side is fighting for completely different ideologies, regardless of one members personal beliefs. grrm could not have made it anymore clear.

team black isn’t just fighting for rhaenyra to be queen, they’re fighting for the monarch’s right to choose an heir, for the oaths they swore years before, for the complete opposite of precedent/tradition: the king’s word is law. team green isn’t just fighting for aegon to be king, they’re fighting for tradition, that no matter the words of a king being law sons will always come before daughters, that oaths are fickle and don’t matter. each side is in some way fighting back against what’s already been established for the kingdom, but the end goal is completely different.

we’re not given as much insight into why most of the houses initially sided with rhaenyra, but we do have an inkling into how the green council felt and acted, however. jaehaerys choosing baelon over rhaenys (against andal tradition, the king can choose his heir) is one point. the great council of 101 is another. alicent, despite being the leader of the council, is removed from the equation and shoved off to the side when it comes to swearing oaths of loyalty between the members on account of her womanhood. daemon being a second coming of ‘maegor’ (despite what we know would be a better suited title for aemond, but i digress) is also used. when discussing who would side with them the vale is automatically disqualified from the list, due to them presently being ruled by a woman, jeyne arryn. she doesn’t choose to fight for rhaenyra for the sole reason of them being kin, but because her own right to rule can and will be put into question if aegon steps over rhaenyra. because she is a woman. she does so in spite of her dislike for daemon (and his supposed maegor-ness) too.

even if one were to look at each characters personal feelings about the succession the fact of the matter is that rhaenyra is usurped because she is a woman. it’s stated almost blatantly multiple times before and during the war. the greens use scapegoats and smokescreens in attempts justify it (her ‘bastards’ chief among them, but legally her sons live and die as the trueborn children between her and laenor, with the reminder that septon eustace refutes this claim to begin with). even when she is killed grrm has her breast pricked to arouse a dragon that doesn’t want to kill her (and why is that?). aegon ‘wins’ against her and is king, but then why is jaehaera, as his last living remaining child not named his heir? why is aegon iii put ahead of her, despite being the enemies son? these are rhetorical questions. aegon had no plans to ever consider her his heir, he made it clear with how excited he was to marry cassandra baratheon and produce more ‘strong’ sons. his dragon (who had fought and bled for him the entire war) wasn’t mourned properly, he couldn’t wait to hatch a ‘new dragon, prouder and fiercer than the last.’ yet he wasn’t even capable of doing that in the six months before he too was killed.

it’s also safe to mention that grrm created an entire separate lore story, one that would seem to have no bearing on the original story unless you’re capable of understanding symbolism. the amethyst empress is usurped by her younger brother the bloodstone emperor, and the first long night ensues from this decision. rhaenyra (amethyst = arryn blue + targaryen red) is usurped by her younger brother aegon ii (bloodstone = hightower green + targaryen red) and the dying of the dragons, the very creatures needed to stop the next long night, are eradicated, along with the magic needed to hatch them and keep them alive (until). the war is the blacks (power, death, grief, rebellion, restraint) versus the greens (ambition, greed, jealousy, anger, wealth). the amethyst empress is important to the main story in the same way that rhaenyra is important, that snubbing the women (an integral aspect to the power the targaryens held) of house targaryen can lead only to disaster. daenerys is the key, the one to break the cycle and fix the wrongdoings caused by her ancestors obsession with power. mother of dragons, mhysa, breaker of chains, slayer of lies, daughter of death, the dragon queen, azor ahai come again, the prince that was promised will bring the dawn.

you can argue for technicalities sake all day, but there is a meaning to this story beyond the scope of rightful heirs. and it shouldn’t be shoved off to the side just so you can praise your favorites and hate those who go against them. it makes for a poor consuming of the actual story. fire and blood was created as a history book to expand on daenerys as a character. her family, what and where she’s come from, and how she relates to them. she’s the antithesis to every targaryen that’s come before her, a hero in her own right. the only targaryen’s we can say are radically important to dany’s story are the conquerors (aegon the conqueror with teats) and rhaenyra (the amethyst empress). i don’t know, just some food for thought.

edit: i have revised some of my opinions on this through a further reread but the gist of it is still the same.

[winterarmyy]

Plot Twist | Part I

An arranged marriage with mafia!bucky.

Run-through: I just need to get this out of my system. Most of arranged marriage mob/mafia!au I've read has a strong/bratty reader. And a really mean/asshole Bucky. Which is absolutely fine btw but its getting repetitive for me. I wanted to see a reader who's actually soft but fierce when she wants to be. And Bucky who is generally cold and seems to be married to his job but notices small things that the reader do, thus subconsciously started to care about her. They don’t hate each other, nor do they are infatuated. I don’t know if this exist, so I decided write it myself just in case. Enjoy!

Navigation: Part I | Part II | Part III* (end) | Extra

Words: 1.1k++

Pairing: beefy mafia!bucky x female!reader

Warnings: just fluffy and wholesome stuff here. Nothing graphic or explicit.

P/S: I like to write in 3rd pov btw. There's a few mentions of y/n sometimes too. Beware of the grammar mistakes, English is not my first language. This might be 2-3 parts type of fic, so tell me what you think so far.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

“He's late.”

The soft clinking sounds of his rings colliding with each other and onto the dresser woke her up from her deep slumber. Though her body remained still, her mind continued to wonder,

“Late. Again.”  She thought.

The sound of fabrics rustling about hinted her of what was happening beyond her closed eyes. The shut of the bathroom door confirmed her speculations.

“So, what if he came back home late? Why does it concern you?” She questioned herself.

Only a fool would believe if she said that she didn't care at all about the whereabout and well-being of this man. He is her husband after all.

Six months ago, she stood on the alter with that man. They swore an oath. They sealed the kiss. He was hers and she was his.

James Buchanan Barnes; Bucky was what he preferred to called. He is what every man wants to become, and every woman wants to be with.

An Adonis of a man; impossibly tall, 6'5"; body armored with thick layer of muscles. Bucky is huge, that if he trapped her against the wall, she might just see the resemblance of him to a grizzly bear. His dark hair flowed just above his shoulder and his steel blue eyes were as cold as his personality.

Though she wouldn't compare him to a frozen blizzard during the winter, he was more like the first day of snow, when the white flakes started to fall.

Cold enough to make you shiver and warm enough to lure you out but most importantly, obscenely beautiful.

However, of course, the main reason of the marriage set up by her father was not because of how beautiful he is, but to fulfil his hunger for power. As if the territories that their family has wasn't enough, her father arranged this union to extend his reign.

Y/N protested at first but knew better than to fight against her father. Being raised in such family, at a very young age she learned to think always ahead; pass the emotions and intuitions. What's the rational and logical way to solve a problem.

Took her a week to wrap her head around the matter, research about Barnes and go through the agreement between her father and her then husband to be. Barnes had listed some main demands regarding the union and although most of them were about their business, but one particular demand had caught her attention.

“After marriage, the couple must be faithful to one another. Any romantic/sexual relationships prior must be severed/resolved immediately. Failed to do so will result to termination of the contract.”

“Hmm. Interesting.” She thought.

Not that she was in any relationship at the time, and all the research result to possibly positive outcome. So, in the end, she complied.

Which then explained why she was sleeping in Bucky's bed six months later.

“I know you're awake.” Bucky's gravel voice startled her internal thoughts. She could feel the indentation of the mattress on his side of the bed, the fresh and clean scent wafting from him. She nearly purred from a sniff of it.

She slowly opened her eyes as if she was trying to peep and god what a sight to see after a restless sleep; Bucky's idea of pajamas was basic pants and nothing above and Y/N didn’t know what to feel about that. Does she hate it? Absolutely not. Does she like it? Well, he is easy on the eye indeed.

The room was dimly lit, but she could see his slightly damp hair; it looked longer than it is dry. Her eyes followed the outline of his body leaning against the bed. The soft light reflected on his metal arm particularly follows the gold lines decorating the dark surface.

She often had intrusive thoughts of tracing the lines; what would it feel like against her fingertips. Does he feel anything? Is it cold? Will it feel good? 

“You do know that it’s a waste your time to wait for me, right?” He huffed a heavy breath. She could hear the fatigue in his sigh.

And how does Bucky know that she waited for him before admitting her defeat to the drowsiness? Somehow, Bucky always managed to know things, to the littlest matter, even when he’s million miles across the world.

Just like when she found a copy of Pride and Prejudice on the bed a few months ago. The day before she received it, her copy was drenched in coffee; a young woman bumped into her in front of the café she often visit. He was in Russia that time. “Was it Clint? Did he tell Bucky?” she wondered.

“Whoever said I was waiting for you?” She scoffed, yet if the room was well lit enough, Bucky would’ve seen how playful her expression was.

He hummed a deep voice, “Hmm.” there’s a hint of doubt in his tone.

Y/N quickly follow her previous sentence, “I was simply enjoying my reading, that I lost track of time.” She shifted to face him and tucked herself further into the blanket, hiding the lower half of her face as she looked up at him. She wondered if he could tell that she was smiling just from her eyes.

Bucky’s gaze remained still on her, as if he was trying to reach into her soul, before he leaned closer to peek on the book on the table. Pride and Prejudice written on it.

He chuckled, which was rare. At the least the real ones are.

Of course, she had seen him smile and laugh countless of time. Especially during those gala they often attend. But those were just another set of armor he wore on a daily basis.

Bucky tried to bite back a smile, sinking his teeth into his lower lip, “Lost track of time, huh?” Yet, somehow Y/N can hear the smile in his tone.

“A good read?” he asked as if he did not know why his wife brought up about the book. She never said anything about the gift; not a thank you or a complaint. 

She simply cherish it in her own way. He heard from Clint that she rearranged her whole bookshelf just to make space for the book he gave her. Maybe this was her way of saying thank you.

He had been giving her books every week, since.

She pulled the blanket away from her face, lips curled into a genuine smile, “Always.”

Bucky preened to her reply before suddenly, “Okay, enough chit chat. It’s late.” he said almost monotone sounded, as he made himself comfortable under the blanket.

Before she could overthink of what went wrong, why the sudden drop of chemistry; that was when she felt his hand roamed to find hers. Bucky brought her palm closer to his face, she could feel his hot breath against her cold skin. 

He leaned his lips on her palm, leaving a soft and tender kiss as he mumbled, “Goodnight, doll.”

Rush of red shades bloomed on her cheeks, before caving into the feeling of his stubble on her hand. She gently caresses the side of his cheeks, hoping it soothes him to sleep. 

The corners of her lips curved upwards into a smile, "See? Like, the first day of snow."

Part II >>

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: It’s my first fic so... share your thoughts? ily 🤍

[onceuponastory]

heartbeats - bucky barnes x reader

Plot: Like most people in the hospital she works in, Y/N is head over heels in love with the gorgeous paramedic Bucky Barnes. Yet she has come to the conclusion that their small chats they have whenever he drops off a patient is the closest thing they have to a relationship. That is, however, until an accident on a night out brings them closer together. Pairing: Paramedic!Bucky Barnes x Doctor!Female!Reader Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, needles, pain meds/drugs, injuries (nothing too graphic) and bruising. As always, if I miss any triggers please let me know! Notes: This is my first entry for the @buckybarnesevents Alternate June-iverse Challenge! One of my squares was Nurse, so here we are! Obligatory I am not a doctor (clearly), so my medical knowledge may not be the most accurate. Not beta’d, so any mistakes are my own. 

“Hey. What have we got?” Y/N asks, waiting to greet the incoming ambulance.

“You know, I’d say I admire your tenacity to provide the best care to patients as soon as they arrive… but I know the real reason you got down here so quickly.” Her coworker smirks.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m here to help treat the patient, which I swore an oath to do.” Y/N lies, ignoring the way her cheeks are heating up with embarrassment.

“Oh suuure, you’re totally here for honest reasons. Definitely not just to see if the hot paramedic is coming. You’re really not subtle, Y/N.”

“Who's to say that’s not why you’re here, too?” Y/N replies. But her coworker is right. Y/N loves her job as a doctor, and getting to help so many people from all different walks of life. Especially after the amount of studying it took to get here. Yet, she’d be lying if she said that seeing the paramedic Bucky Barnes isn’t a big part of her job happiness. Bucky, the aforementioned hot paramedic, is charming, caring and makes everyone in the hospital swoon with just a smile in their direction. If Bucky treated all the people who have heart palpitations and need oxygen when he shows up, he’d be a billionaire. 

As one of the lead emergency doctors in the hospital, Y/N comes into contact with Bucky a lot during her shifts. And each time, his dazzling ocean blue eyes and winning smile send her heart into a flutter and make her legs go weak. Like everyone else in the hospital, Y/N is head over heels in love with the charming paramedic. Every time she sees him, she wants to get over her nerves and finally ask him out, or just to get to know him better. While, of course, secretly hoping that he feels the same way as she does. And yet, she just can't bring herself to tell him the truth. She and Bucky have a great working relationship despite only seeing each other during a patient handover, and despite how much she wants to get closer to him, she also doesn’t want to ruin what they have, and make either of their jobs awkward.

And besides, he has the pick of almost everyone in this entire hospital, so he definitely wouldn’t go for her.

But then, the sound of sirens cuts through the air, interrupting Y/N’s thoughts. It’s time to go to work, and not think about her incredibly attractive coworker. Yet, when the ambulance door opens, a familiar face steps out.

“Afternoon ladies.” Bucky grins. Y/N swears he even throws a wink in there. Immediately, her heart starts beating even faster. Sometimes, Y/N wonders if Bucky does actually know the effect he has on people, how he makes them all swoon and go weak with just a smile. If he does know, Y/N thinks he relishes in it.

“Hey. What have we got?”

“This is Mike. He’s a 23-year-old male who had a fall at work, and is now complaining of pain in his left side.” As Bucky explains the man’s condition, Y/N’s mind goes back to her feelings for him. She’d love to tell him the truth about how she feels more than anything, but the only time they see each other is when they’re with a patient, which doesn’t exactly lend itself to a lot of conversations, let alone heart to heart talks about your feelings. And her time spent with Bucky is always quick before he has to go be a hero again. She can’t just dump all her feelings for him when he’s about to leave. “Can I leave him in your very capable hands, Y/N?” Bucky asks, a small smirk playing on his lips.

“Of course.” As Bucky departs, Y/N watches him go, registering a strange twinge in her heart. One she normally feels whenever Bucky is around. God, this man is definitely going to break her heart one day.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A few weeks later,

“Y/N, are you sure you’re okay? Your ankle looks really bad.”

“I’m fine.” Y/N lies. “I’m a doctor, remember?” A doctor with a very twisted ankle that hurts to even move. Groaning, Y/N leans back, trying to avoid hurting herself even more. This isn’t how tonight was supposed to go. It was a celebration of finally finishing four night shifts in a row and having some time off to recharge. But, after one drink too many and a pair of heels that are just too high to walk in comfortably, here she is. Sitting on the side of the road with a throbbing ankle and her pride and happiness shattered.

“Y/N, I really think we should call you an ambulance. You need to be checked out.”

“I’m a doctor, I can do it. I’m okay.” Y/N snaps. Gritting her teeth, she tries to push herself up, but cannot get to her feet without yelling out in pain.

“Absolutely not. You need to go to the hospital, and none of us are sober enough to drive you.” One of her friends replies, taking out her phone and calling for help, ignoring Y/N’s complaints. As she sits back down, trying to manoeuvre her ankle into a more comfortable position, Y/N knows her friends are right. She needs help, which she isn’t able to provide for herself. Maybe for once, after all her time spent taking care of others… it’s her turn to be taken care of. Soon enough, albeit longer than Y/N likes, an ambulance pulls up.

“Thank god.” She murmurs. However, when the paramedic steps out, illuminated by the streetlight, Y/N immediately regrets her words. “Oh, fuck.”

Bucky Barnes is standing right in front of her.

“Hey everyone, where’s the- Y/N?!” he gasps. She can’t fully explain the emotion on his face as he looks at her. In fact, it looks like a mix of emotions: surprise, concern and pity all rolled into one. Heat rises through Y/N’s body, settling on her cheeks. Bucky is the last person she wants to see her like this, sitting in the middle of the street on a Saturday night, in pain and crying, no doubt with her makeup smeared everywhere. At that moment, all she wants is for the ground to open up and swallow her whole. Bucky kneels beside her, his face mere inches from her. “Not going to lie, you’re not who I expected to see tonight. But it’s a welcome surprise.” He smiles, and Y/N registers a familiar fluttering sensation in her stomach. “So, how are you feeling? Your friend said you broke your ankle, but what’s your personal diagnosis, doc?” He chuckles, and Y/N’s blush deepens. Bucky’s never called her doc before… and she’s just realised that she loves it.

“I think it’s just a sprain. Nothing worth worrying about.” Bucky chuckles, shaking his head.

“Well, you say that… but I still wanna check you over in the ambulance.” Y/N suppresses a groan. Of course he does. God, why does he have to be so thorough?! Why can’t, just this once, he- “Besides, if I missed something, I’d never forgive myself, especially if something terrible happened to you.” He admits, his words suddenly leaving her speechless and her heart racing. “Can’t have the best doctor in the area out of action, now can we?”

“Okay, now I know you’re just saying that to make me feel better.” 

“Nope. It’s true.” Bucky shrugs, and Y/N gasps.

“I-I-thank you.” She stammers out a reply, still in shock. She’s not used to this, to seeing Bucky outside of her job, and especially not as a patient. Or to be complimented so much by him. And what a way to start. But at least she’s finally going to know what being cared for by Bucky Barnes feels like.

“Can you walk?” Bucky asks, gently helping her up. When she yelps in pain after putting pressure on her injured foot, Bucky whispers: “It’s alright. Just lean on me, okay? Your carriage awaits.” He chuckles. Despite how weird this situation is, it feels nice to be so close to Bucky, and to be cracking jokes with him like they’re actually friends, and not just coworkers. Y/N just wishes it could be like this all the time. Aside from the twisted ankle, of course. 

Slowly, Bucky leads her inside the ambulance, and onto the bed inside. Y/N watches him as he grabs all the equipment he needs. Her brain feels like it’s going a million miles a minute as Bucky’s words replay in her mind. “I’d never forgive myself.” Does he care about her? Is there a chance he feels the same way about her? 

But then, her mind brings her crashing back down to reality. Of course he cares about her. It’s his fucking job. And right now, she’s just like any other patient. One that’s hopelessly in love with her paramedic and wants him to feel even a smidge of the love she feels for him. Although maybe, just this once, she can pretend that it’s just for her. Slowly, Y/N’s eyes wander lower. God, how does his ass look so good in that uniform?

“I bet this is a unique experience for you, huh? Being the one getting diagnosed?” Bucky laughs, turning back to her. “Especially by me.” Y/N nods, hoping and praying to whatever higher power there is that Bucky didn’t catch her staring, and especially not at his ass. “I just need to check your vitals.” Bucky explains, holding up a stethoscope. Y/N gulps. Bucky’s going to be closer to her than he ever has before, and there’s nothing she can do about it. Gently, Bucky lifts up her shirt, pressing the stethoscope to her skin. Despite the sensation of the cool metal against her skin, Y/N has never felt so warm in all her life.

“Your heart rate seems to be elevated.” He muses. “Take a deep breath for me.” As she does, Bucky tuts. “Your breathing is a little shallow, and you seem stressed. Although, I guess that’s normal after something like this.” Oh, if only he knew the true reason. As Bucky checks her blood pressure, his face is mere millimetres from hers. So close Y/N can see the grey hairs within his beard, feel his breath against her skin and even smell its minty freshness. And it’s sending her heart into a spiral. If only she could actually work up the guts to tell him the truth about how she feels. “So, do you mind me asking what happened?” Bucky asks as he checks her ankle, gently pressing against the tender skin. Each time he touches it, it sends shockwaves throughout her entire body.

“Well, let’s just say alcohol and high heels really aren’t the best combination. God, I knew it was a bad idea to wear those shoes. Especially when I’m so clumsy.”

“It’s alright. You’re not the first patient I’ve seen who needs a bit more practice with heels, and you definitely won’t be the last.” He reassures her, his words making her smile. A genuine smile, her first since she hurt her ankle. “If I’m hurting you, just say okay?” Actually, it doesn’t hurt. Or at least, not as much as she expected it to. Of course, part of it could be down to the shock, but she knows a larger part of it is because of how much care and tenderness Bucky is treating her with. She looks up, catching his eyes. Would telling him the truth be so bad after all? “I think you’re right. It’s starting to bruise, and it looks like a sprain. But I still want to take you to hospital to get you checked out and get an X-Ray, just in case.” 

“Let me guess, the one I work in? God, my coworkers will never let me live it down.” Y/N groans as Bucky injects her with some pain meds.

“If anyone gives you trouble, just tell me, alright? I’ve got your back.” He winks, and Y/N’s stomach flutters again.

“My hero.” she giggles, and Bucky even bows for her. But Bucky is a hero, one who saves people day in and day out. Hopefully, he knows just how loved and appreciated he is. Of course, as a doctor, Y/N knows people would say the same about her too. Yet, she knows she doesn’t hold a candle to just how kind and caring Bucky is.

Throughout the ride to the hospital, Y/N begins to get sleepier as the meds begin to work. “Thanks Bucky. You know, I should get you a drink after this.” She mumbles, not expecting him to hear her. But when Bucky laughs and says, 

“Okay, sure. I’d love that.” her blood chills. When she said before that she wanted the ground to open up and swallow her whole when Bucky first saw her in pain, she was wrong. This is when she wants the ground to swallow her whole. After that, she sits in silence for the rest of the ride, all the way til Bucky wheels her into the hospital. “Well, this is the end of the line.” He sighs, his tone causing Y/N to raise a brow. Maybe it’s just the drugs talking, but she swears Bucky is sad to see her go. “Now, promise me you’ll take care of yourself, alright? I don’t wanna see you here again anytime soon. At least… not on this side of things. We have to get you back here as soon as possible.”

“Thanks Bucky.” She smiles. “It’s just part of the job, right?” She chuckles. Yet, Bucky shakes his head.

“Not always. Sometimes it’s because you care about the person too.” But before Y/N can say anything, he’s gone, off to save the world again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“I still cannot believe you got treated and brought in by the hot paramedic.” Y/N’s coworker gasps as she bandages her foot. “What did he say? What did you say?!”

“Nothing.” Y/N sighs. “I was in shock for most of it. Both literally and figuratively.”

“Well, at least you got to hang out with him outside work… sort of.” And now, she’s off work for a bit until her ankle heals, meaning she won’t see Bucky for a while. Just her fucking luck. But then, a knock sounds at the door, and her supervisor pops his head inside.

“This arrived for you, Y/N.” He says, passing over an envelope. Inside is a get well soon card. She knows who sent it to her before she even opens it.

“To Y/N. My favourite doctor. Or should I say my favourite patient? Don’t tell the others I said that. Honestly, though, I hope your ankle feels better soon. If you are serious about that drink, give me a call. Although maybe don’t bring your heels this time.” Bucky’s number is written underneath. Y/N stares at the letter, still unsure that it’s real. Maybe it’s even a hallucination caused by the meds. But, it’s still there. It’s still real.

And that means Bucky wants to see her. Immediately, her heart pounds, and her stomach flutters all over again.

“Oh, my god.” Her coworker gasps, peering over her shoulder to read the card. “Are you gonna call him?”

“Yeah…” Y/N smiles. “Yeah, I think I will.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

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[guardian-of-da-gay]

The Law Won

Read on Ao3

For Whumptober 2024 Prompt 3: Wrongfully Arrested

tw for mentioned murder, kidnapping, and wrongful imprisonment

Maddie had forbidden Tom from harming the raccoons around their house.  Tom was of the mind that raccoons were varmints that didn’t belong around the house.  Maddie was of the mind that no matter the messes they made, the outdoors belonged to wild animals first.  Inside their house was another matter.  When they realized there were raccoons in their crawl space–even squeezing into their basement–Maddie agreed to set some live traps.

Except somehow, someway, the raccoons managed to steal the bait without setting off the traps.  Repeatedly.  They tested and retested the traps themselves and they worked perfectly.  The raccoons were just too smart!

Tom suggested asking Tails for help.  Their youngest could probably build something no raccoon on Earth could outsmart.  But they had yet to involve their children in the fight.  Mostly because Maddie was nervous that if Knuckles, their resident warrior and hunter, knew they had a pest problem she’d one day be presented with an unsolicited pile of raccoon pelts.  Besides… Tails would probably build something that sent the raccoons to space.  As much as Tom seemed to relish both of these scenarios, Maddie was against them.

She was frustrated, but she was not at Tom’s level.  The raccoons were not her enemies.  They just had a lot of diseases and parasites that absolutely didn’t belong in her home.  And she explained as much to Crazy Carl when Tom brought him over.

Apparently, while trying to catch the ‘Blue Devil’ Carl had become an expert in custom-built live traps… Which was a little disturbing.  Maddie asked Sonic if he was okay with Carl being in his space and Sonic looked at her like she was crazy and declared ‘Don’t be weird, Carl and I go way back!’

So Carl came over and built something that Indiana Jones might struggle to get out of and Maddie paid him what he asked: a homemade dessert.  The Wachowskis went to bed that night, with Tom and Maddie feeling pretty good that their creature problem would be solved by morning.

They were all woken by what sounded like a metal avalanche.

Ozzie immediately sounded the alarm.

“Carl didn’t say it would be so loud!” Maddie complained as she staggered out of their bedroom.  A well-practiced vet instinct had her reaching out and snatching Ozzie’s collar before he could go running ahead.  She wheeled him back into the bedroom and shut him in.

The noise was still going.

“Carl didn’t say what would be so loud?”  Sonic darted in front of them.

Tails flew after him, fur puffed.  “What’s that noise?”  He asked.

“Carl set a raccoon trap in the basement!”  Tom said, tone bordering on gleeful.  

The sound changed.  The banging was getting closer.  Then it was in the kitchen.

“Oh no, not in my kitchen!”  Maddie yelped.  She ran down the hall, imagining her kitchen covered in roundworms and leptospirosis and salmonellosis and toxoplasmosis and–

“I’ll get them out!”  Sonic dashed ahead of her, Tails in hot pursuit.

“Wait, Sonic they can have–” parvovirus and distemper and “-- rabies !”

But Sonic was already gone.  She and Tom rushed to follow.  Up ahead, Sonic started cackling.  They entered the kitchen just in time to see Knuckles ushering the last of a family of raccoons out the back door.  He slammed the door behind them and moved in front of it.

He was, for some reason, covered in fishing line and empty tin cans.  The look he leveled on all of them was simultaneously ferocious and sheepish.

For a moment, they all stared at one another.  None of them expected for this to be the situation they would face tonight, but here they were.  Then Sonic started giggling.  Maddie didn’t find the situation that amusing, but Tom was smiling.  Tails looked nervously between them all.

“ Knuckles ,” Sonic wheezed between his fingers.  “What the hell?!”

***

“So you see,” Knuckles explained.  “I did not break my oath to protect this world with you!  I merely sided with the raccoons in this instance.”

Maddie frowned as she grabbed another snarl of fishing line from between two of Knuckles’ quills and cut it free.  They’d moved him to the dining room while Sonic cleaned the kitchen floor at warp speed.  Maddie knelt beside him, painstakingly removing the tangle of line from his quills and wishing she had her surgery lights from the clinic.

Beside her, Tails sat on a dining room chair, occasionally offering Maddie scissors or tweezers as she needed.  Maddie tugged a strand out of Knuckles’ quills and Tom held out the trash bag for her to drop it in.  Ozzie had gone back to sleep, but this time beneath the dining room table so he could still feel included.

Sonic snapped another picture with his phone and Maddie shot him a Mom Look™.  Beside her, Knuckles offered a less potent, but still effective Knuckles Glare™.  Sonic was really close to being assigned the second fishing line snipper and put to work digging through Knuckles’ quills.

“So you’re the reason the raccoons were getting out?”  Tom clarified.  “Why?!”  He shook the trash bag as he gestured his confusion.

“Why were you so determined to capture them?”  Knuckles asked petulantly.

“Because they carry diseases and parasites,” Maddie answered.

“That can get inside your brain,” Tom tacked on.

“Yes.  Really bad parasites.”

“Oh,” Knuckles frowned consideringly.  “Well… that’s not their fault.”

“Yes, that's why we were going to capture them and release them elsewhere ,”  Maddie explained, exasperated.  “Now they might come back.  And they walked through the kitchen .  Knuckles, we eat here!”

“I didn’t know all of that!”  Knuckles crossed his arms and looked away, inadvertently tugging some fishing line out of Maddie’s hands.  “I have been captured before and I was never once released safely elsewhere!”

“Whoa, whoa, wait.”  Sonic held up his hands to signal for a time out.  “How many times have you been captured?”

Knuckles threw out his arms.  “I just said ‘many times’!”  Maddie clicked her tongue as he once again tugged a fishing line out of her fingers.  She wasn’t sure how Crazy Carl was planning on them getting a raccoon out of all this… But it probably would’ve worked on the Blue Devil.

“Yeah, and I asked how many?”

“I don’t know!”  Knuckles shrugged.  “I was caught by scavengers on my homeworld.  I escaped.”  He shifted his arm as Maddie plucked at a stray string.  “Then again in Sandopolis by the Dingo Regime–”  He paused and actually spat on Maddie’s dining room floor before carrying on as if nothing had happened.  “Then I went to Prison World and then the arena–”

“Wait.”  Tails perked up beside her.  “Prison World?”  That’s… Knuckles, that's just prison .  You weren’t captured, you were arrested!”

Maddie paused her work and leaned back, both brows raised.  Knuckles didn’t look defensive or ashamed as she might expect.  He looked thoughtful.  Like it hadn’t occurred to him that being put in prison was a result of his own actions.

“Uh… I think we are getting off topic.” Tom said.  “The raccoons–”

“No, I think we’ve found a disturbing new topic…” Maddie said.

“Arrested?”  Sonic gasped.  “Actually, why am I gasping?  I’m not even surprised!  What did you get arrested for?  Was it something cool?”

Tom and Maddie both gave him a disapproving look.  Knuckles just shrugged.  “They didn’t say there was a reason, so I assumed it was a normal ‘capture the echidna’ situation.”

Maddie forgot her task entirely as she crossed her arms.  There were a lot of things wrong with that statement but first and foremost: “Yeah, there’s no such thing as a ‘normal’ capturing situation.”

“There is for me.”

“Wasn’t there a trial?”  Tom asked.  “Did you get a lawyer?”

“No.  And I don’t know what that is.”

“What about a sentencing hearing?”  Tom persisted.  “Did they tell you how long you’d be in prison?”

“No.”

Tom looked between Sonic and Tails before settling on Tails.  “So, was there just… no justice system?  Not even a really flawed one?”

“Oh!”  Tails started.  He fiddled with the tweezers in his hands.  “Um… well, we definitely had a really flawed justice system where I’m from but… Well, a lot of planets use Prison World and not all of them work the same.”

Maddie thought that was the most flawed part of the system then.

“How old were you?”  Sonic asked suddenly.

Maddie looked to Sonic, surprised at the question.  Then she looked to Knuckles, who once again, looked thoughtful.  She was forcibly reminded that despite Knuckles’s deep voice and the way he carried himself, he was a teenager.  He must have been even younger when he was arrested.

“I don’t know,” Knuckles said.  He glanced at Tails and stared at him a moment.  “Around your age I think.  It was not long after I lost my tribe… and the uniforms we had to wear!  Mine was the smallest they had and it was still too large.”

Oh, Maddie hated that.  A glance at Tom confirmed he was feeling the same revulsion.

Knuckles just shrugged though.  “Honestly I could have been arrested for anything.  I had no money.  Anything I needed, I stole.”

“Valid,” Sonic cut in while Tails nodded along.

“Not to mention all the places I broke into in search of the Master Emerald.  I never found it, of course, but you can trade jewels for food so–”

“Knuckles, did you rob jewelry stores ?” Tom gasped like a pearl-clutching church marm.

Knuckles nodded matter-of-factly.  “And the homes of wealthy individuals.”

“Nice.  Eat the rich,” Sonic said.

Knuckles did a whole body pause, eyes widening.  “Uh…… I did not–”

“Figure of speech!  Not literally!” Sonic said quickly.  “Don’t worry about it.  Carry on!”

“Maybe that’s why you got arrested?”  Tom proposed, getting them back on track.  “Rich people really don’t like being robbed.”

Well, nobody did, but Maddie got what he meant.  She could see some snobby rich person sending a little kid to jail for spite.

“No…”  Knuckles shook his head, his expression still thoughtful.  “No, now that I have context, the people who took me to Prison World must have been law enforcement agents.  The Dingos–” he spat again, “--took me from Sandopolis to another world with the intent of selling me, but I got loose and killed them.  Then the police came and I destroyed a lot of their vehicles.  So… it was probably either the killings or the vehicle damage.”  He tapped his chin thoughtfully.

The statement was met by a resounding silence.  Tom stared at Knuckles like he’d just grown a second head.  Sonic looked like he was mentally flipping through how he could spin this so it didn’t look so bad.  Tails stared at his shoes, clearly regretting bringing any of this up.

Maddie tried to emotionally undo the knot in her stomach.  It disturbed her to learn Knuckles had killed people.  Maybe this was somewhat offset by the fact the people he’d killed had been planning on selling him, she wasn’t sure.  She loved watching her hashtag girlboss favorite characters kill off everyone who wronged them, but in real life?  Her feelings were way more complex.  Further complicating things was how disturbingly callous he was about what he’d done.  Like taking lives meant nothing .

“I have said the wrong thing,” Knuckles’ eyes narrowed.

“No, no!”  Sonic tried, waving his hands like he could dispel the bad vibes.  “I mean…”  He winced.  “Kinda?  Just!  You might not want to mention k-wording people around anyone other than us, okay?  The average person on Earth doesn’t have a body count so… yeah.”

Knuckles was unimpressed.  “I do have a significant ‘body count’,” he emphasized.  “Killing was part of my life.”

Sonic chuckled nervously, his eyes darting to every member of the family and back to Knuckles.  “Well, if we ever need a hit man…”  He visibly suppressed a wince at his own bad joke.

Knuckles eyes narrowed to slits.  “You will find someone else,” he said sharply.  They all tensed as he stepped into Sonic’s space, towering over him.  “I will not be used as a weapon by my tribe.  If killing is necessary in my mission to protect the Emerald or this planet then so be it, but never by a whim or for your amusement!”

“Okay!  Okay, bad joke.  Sorry.”  Sonic took several steps back, holding up his hands in surrender.  “We wouldn’t really ever ask you to kill anyone.”

“The opposite actually,” Tom cut in.  “No killing anyone on Earth ever.”

Knuckles’ eyes slid to the side.  “What if I have… already possibly killed some people on Earth?”

“What?!”  Tom gasped, dropping the trash bag.

“Knuckles!”  Maddie yelled.

“They could be alive!”  Knuckles said quickly.  “Two disappeared, I don’t know where… but possibly to the next life.  The third, I simply did not check if he was alive or not.”

“You killed three people?!”  Tom threw up his hands.

“Did you not listen to what I just said?  I don’t know for certain!”

“When?”  Sonic demanded.  “ Where ?”

“What happens in Reno, stays in Reno.”

“Wha–”  Tom sputtered.  “At the bowling tournament?”

“Where was Wade?”  Maddie asked.  “Does he know?”

“What happens in Reno–”

“Nuh-uh.”  Maddie held a finger up in front of Knuckles face so she knew he was on thin-fricking-ice.  “Does Wade know?”

Knuckles sighed the most teenager-like sigh.  “ Yes .  He was there when it happened.”

“Oh my god,” Maddie said, turning to Tom.  “I’m going to kill him.”

“You just said that’s a bad thing!”

“I’m not actually going to kill him!  Because killing is bad!”

“Wait, wait, hang on!”  Sonic zipped forward to stand between Knuckles and the rest of them, spinning his hands like he could physically rewind the conversation.  “ Wade saw you maybe kill some people and he was just… fine with it?”  He turned around and looked between Tom and Maddie to see if they understood the significance of this.

“Well… sort of.”  Knuckles rumbled.  “They were trying to sell me.  Or use me for some sort of weapon?” He shrugged like this was no big deal.

Wade was dead.  He was so dead.

“He acknowledged that it was a difficult situation.  Then the Whipple matriarch, Wendy, was concerned that if they went to any sort of authorities, that I would not be able to claim self-defense since I do not legally exist and have no ‘legal protections’.”  He scowled at the memory.  “Apparently my strength is not enough protection because it is ‘different’.  She was quite sure I would be imprisoned in a government laboratory forever.”  He held out his mitts and shrugged once again.  “We all agreed to leave Reno in Reno.”

The Wachowskis sat with that for a moment.  Knuckles was right.  He wasn’t just an illegal alien he was an illegal extra-terrestrial .  There was no justice system to represent him here.  Not even a really flawed one.  Just like that world that asked no questions and threw a little kid in jail for killing his captors, he would likely wind up in some G.U.N. holding cell.

Assuming they didn’t know and hadn’t already let it slide.

“Okay,” Tom broke the silence.  “From now on.  Avoid killing people at all costs.  Like never, ever, ever do it.  If you’re in trouble like you were in Reno, you call us okay?  Call your tribe.”

“The family that slays together,” Sonic muttered under his breath.

“Sonic,” Maddie admonished.

“I mean, Dad’s right!  Sonic said.  “We’re stronger together.  There’s nothing we can’t fix–in a non-lethal way–if we work together.”

Tails nodded beside him.  “We all look out for each other,” he said.

Some of the tension eased from Knuckles’ shoulders.  “That is agreeable,” he said.  “I am a proud echidna warrior and always will be!  But… I do not want killing to be a part of my life.  Not even our neighbors, the raccoons.”

Maddie let out a breath.  He’d been so casual before that she’d been afraid… But no, he’d been casual about stealing too.  To him it was the same: stealing to eat.  Killing to escape.  Just parts of his life.  Parts that he didn’t want or need anymore.  Just so long as the Wachowskis could keep their promise to stay by his side and protect him as his tribe.

She readjusted to kneel before him.  “I promise, it won’t be,” she said.  She took his hand because she felt she should and gave it a squeeze.  “No more stealing for food. No more being captured.  No more killing, okay?”

Knuckles stared at her hand.  He never fully relaxed, but she did see a degree of tension ease from his shoulders.  He offered  her a small, almost wistful smile.  There was a part of him that didn’t believe her.  But he wanted to.  “I would like that.”

[horizon-verizon]

Thinking about how GRRM literally created Daemon to be Rhaenyra’s consort. For those who don’t know, originally GRRM couldn’t decide on who was the best option for Rhaenyra and that’s when he got the idea of Daemon. He literally created Daemon for Rhaenyra.

Rhaenyra was originally going to marry either a Lannister or Lyonel Strong (Daemon was not yet created or included in this draft) then GRRM thought up the character of Daemon and added him as Rhaenyra’s consort instead.

More male characters should be created SOLELY to love and support the female protagonist.

nobodysuspectsthebutterfly has a post showing GRRM originally had Rhaenyra marry Lyonel Strong (and how no matter what and by whatever husband, the greens were going to try to usurp her), evidenced by the RPG guide (2012) for ASoIaF.

F&B was published in 2015; The Rogue Prince was published along with other stories in an anthology in 2014; and PatQ was published back in 2013. I would say that he created Daemon for Rhaenyra to give Viserys more of a reason to want Rhaenyra as his heir, since Viserys, now that D exists, canonically also wished to make sure the realm would not go towards someone he didn't fully trust. Also it gives the story so much more breath when you have a character like Daemon. And, of course, Rhaenyra and Daemon are pretty compatible in terms of character and political necessities; they provide the other with what they need/want the most even as they aop were "rivals" for the throne even thought they also kinda weren't. This was always Rhaenyra's story, anyway, for all the other interesting characters that surround her and interacted, tried to remove or support her (Corlys, Rhaenys, Alicent, Aemond, etc.). Her childhood, rise, and fall impacted by the misogyny and what she did or tried to do to keep her kids alive AND vie for the throne she was given and had oaths of protection for.

"couldn't decide on who was best who was the best option for Rhaenyra" -- idk, perhaps it was more hi wanting to enrich the story and give more personality and "family" to this part of Targ history, as he has done more for Jaehaerys, Rhaena, Alysanne, Maegor-Aenys before them. This doesn't stop or negate how Daemon was likely made with Rhaenyra's support base in mind. It is compelling to hear of a man/partner do whatever he can for his lover/wife, whether or not he has a character the complexity or cooperativeness of a coconut or as complex as Daemon is bc you don't get that often in traditional fantasy, male centered fantasy. Or it's publicly reviled with a million excuses before whatever version and manifestation in a particular work is actually critiqued. Because sometimes, there is something to be said abt just fictional dudes who are just more trouble than they are worth being posed as a model man. The lines between such things can get crossed.

And it appears Harwin was also created for Rhaenyra since there is no mention of him before PatQ/2013. But he (Harwin) happens to have much less characterization & personality done for him AND Rhaenyra quite clearly wanted to live as freely with a partner as possible and that wasn't really going to happen with Harwin for as long as Laenor lived at least.

Even if she was angry at Daemon for a myriad of possible reasons for the 111-112 incidents and perhaps they finally got through a successful reconciliation through their shared love for Laena (even before her death), there's room for a lot of complex & layered feelings on Rhaenyra's part towards Daemon. And I mention all of this bc apparently, GRRM also toyed with the idea of exploring Rhaenyra and Harwin's relationship more, saying that:

There’s a whole story there. At least a novella, maybe a novel but we simply did not have the time to tell it [in the show]. And it did not fit the format of my history book. But it’s a story and I’d love to do that.

(he is saying that their relationship's arc alone could fill/become a novella and he thought about doing it) which does goes to show you that Harwin WAS very important in some way to Rhaenyra--guaranteed to be someone she felt and experienced was a positive one for a time in her life at the very least.

I don't really go for Harwin bc I don't know anything abt him apart from his position, family, and devotion to Rhaenyra...so he has very little appeal for me in terms of shipping. That, and again, Rhaenyra seems to be the type who wants the "best" sort of conditions to be herself and have relationships in the open. I explain/rant HERE.

Still I agree; more males made only for a woman, plz and thank you. It's what we deserve (if a man is there and/or the attraction is there).

[nevernonline]

✧.* grow as we go; svt smau.

entry #09 seeing red.

synopsis: over the past ten years you’ve fallen in love many times. one day someone happens to stumble across your journal sitting out on your nightstand and started posting your entries online. after all of your secrets are leaked it’s clear things would ever be the same again.

𐦍 paring: svt members x afab! reader.

𐦍 feat: non-idol! svt, (g)-idle minnie&soyeon, oc’s

𐦍 genre/s: reader is super angsty low-key, fluffy, sexual themes.

𐦍 content: swearing, bullying, crazy ex’s, mentions of sexual relations, some drinking& mary jane 🍃

word count: 2.7k

masterlist ▸ 008 not the bath mat.  ▸ 010 coming soon

“You okay?”

Seokmin’s voice rang through y/n’s ears as she drove her car away from of Vernon��s white apartment building. 

“Yeah, I think so. I’m just nervous for some reason like I can’t put into words why, but my gut is telling me something is weird.” 

“Gut instincts are rarely ever wrong, but I’ll be by your side until you tell me you don’t need me to be. Okay?” 

Pulling up into the parking lot of the glass framed building just on the edge of the city overlooking the water, y/n felt her nervous sweating start to begin, almost begging for air conditioning to surround her like a chilled hug. 

“Want to hold my hand?” 

“Yes please, they’re clammy I’m sorry.” 

Gripping onto Vernon’s firm hand the three boys almost looking like her bodyguards bypassed the frenzy of people outside waiting to get their own peak at Minghaos installation themselves and walked through the door. 

The room was filled with small tables, made by hand as a final touch to Minghaos work, adorned with dainty black table clothes and bottles of champagne placed in ice buckets. 

The room was softly lit with yellow and white lighting making everyone have a glow that bounced off of them almost as if they weren’t real. 

“Would you guys like a drink? We have champagne and two signature cocktails, one is a gin based drink called ‘delicate’ and the other is a whiskey ginger based drink called ‘storm cloud.” 

The beautiful waitress signaled at y/n’s small group and pointed out the drinks on the table. 

“I think two storm clouds and one delicate one for sure. Y/n? What would you like?” 

You spun to look into Junhui’s big eyes, skating your head saying anything is alright with you so he made the conclusion to just order you the same as Seokmin to be safe. 

“Thank you.” 

Y/N placed a tip in the small bartenders jar and bid her a smile knowing she’ll be back for more later in the night 

“Should we look around now and try to find Minghao? Or wait a bit?” 

“Seok lets just wait here, it doesn’t seem like anyone is looking around yet, I'm trying to spy for Minnie and Mingyu.” 

“And Mimi.” 

“Yeah. Her too.” 

“Guys, Vernon and I are going to go find Vernon’s friend Seungkwan. We'll be back in a second.” 

“No problem.” 

Y/n and Seokmin waved the cute couple off into the crowd. 

“So y/n.” 

“Seoky.” 

“How are we feeling now? What was going on in the car?” 

“I don’t know. I told you I’m alright.” 

“Yeah but you don’t have to lie to me about that.”

“I promise you I would never lie to you, we basically took an unintentional blood oath as kids it stays” 

“Okay. I love you, you know that right? But I rarely see you nervous like this so I can’t help but feel concerned.”

“Shut up. Yes I do and I love you too. I promise im alright.”

Averting her gaze back to the front door she watched as Minnie and Mingyu walked hand and hand, strutting past a very devious looking Mimi standing to the right, chit chatting with someone who was unrecognizable to y/n. 

“They look good together.” 

“Yeah, they do.” 

“Do you think this fake dating is going to lead to them.. you know.” 

“Well. If I can be honest with you y/n which I'm sure I can, I think it already has.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Are you alright with that?” 

“I am actually. Any other time it would’ve killed me I think, but now.. I don’t know? I’m content. They make sense.” 

“You shine too bright to have someone who shades you.” 

“What does that even mean?” 

“I don’t know actually, I think im drunk already.” 

Y/n placed a small kiss on Seokmin’s temple laughing at his flushed cheeks before a familiar yet irritating voice cut through their ears. 

“Y/n, Seokmin. Hi! You both look absolutely gorgeous. Mind if I sit?” 

“Hi, Mimi. Sure.” 

“How are you guys? This is so beautiful and we haven’t even seen his art yet, how crazy. He’s so talented.” 

“Yeah it’s nice. You look great, I love your bag.” 

“Thank you. You look nice. I see you didn’t go with the outfit you picked out the other day.” 

“Hao told us to come in black so it just didn’t feel right.”

“Mimi, can I ask you how you know Minghao again?” 

“Oh wow, well it’s a long story. We met a few years ago, I haven’t seen him in a while actually.” 

“Ah, I see. Did you go to school together or?” 

“Wow Seokmin, someone’s nosey.” 

“Oh, sorry no, not nosy just curious is all. I didn’t know you knew him.” 

“It’s okay. Our parents actually work together.” 

“Nice.” 

“Do you know if he arrived yet? I’m sure he’d love to see you in this gorgeous outfit. Leaving everything to the imagination, he likes conservative girls.” 

“No we haven’t seen him, we're just waiting for Junhui actually.” 

“Aw, cutie. His boyfriend seems so nice, I stalked them online today. Dumb and dumber vibes, you know? I’m more curious though did you see Minnie and Mingyu? How trashy getting with your friends hook up? Maybe she truly has it out for you. You’re too pretty to never be the one to end up with the guy. But actually you should just date Seokmin, everyone knows how much you guys love each other, it could work out well.”

“Oh I-

“Well, I have to get going and find my way to the girls room. I’ll see you later. Toodles.” 

“Toodles” 

Seokmin’s voice gained a depth that you haven't heard since someone pushed him in the fountain at your high school during senior prank week. 

“What the fuck was that?” 

“Fucking weird is what that was.” 

Seokmin’s tone turned quickly into a quiet mocking of Mimi’s.

“Dumb and Dumber vibes.”

The two of them laughed as they shrugged off the interesting encounter with a former foe.

A bartender came over to the pair and handed them both a flute of champagne, as the rest of the patrons erupted into a roar when Minghao made his way into the building, Wonwoo walking beside him, smiling at his friend who was receiving praise from his acquaintances, hugging and high fiving him for his success, some chanting for him to make a speech.

Minghao walked straight past Mimi who was stealthily placed behind a tall gentleman the star of the night was not paying any attention to her whatsoever, almost like she was invisible. He strode over to the small table where y/n and Seokmin were awkwardly standing clutching the glass flutes, wrapping his arms around the both of them at the same time. 

“You guys look.. amazing, thank you for coming.” 

Minghao took a deep breath and looked up and down at the girl he had his arm around. 

“Seriously. Thank you.” 

“Our pleasure.” 

“I’ll be back after I say some thank yous, maybe we can all walk through together okay?” 

“Cool.” 

The intimate crowd surrounded Minghao and Wonwoo handed him the matching glass of sparkling wine and he held it up as a small cheers. 

Y/n peaked through the crowd and spotted Minnie and Mingyu to her right, still looking as loving as ever, Vernon and Jun to her left with an unrecognizable boy, who threw a small wave in her direction that she could only pass off as Seungkwan the only one she couldn’t place was Mimi.

“Hey guys. I just wanted to say thank you for coming tonight to the opening of my show. It’s been about a two year process to finally get through to this night. Many of you have been around much longer than that, so thank you for supporting me even when I was up late at night calling you upset about how it wasn’t going to work out. Vernon, Wonwoo, Seungkwan, and Mingyu, you guys truly were the only reason I didn’t jump ship many times from achieving this goal. It’s nice to see old faces like yours mixed into a group of new friends. So thank you, everyone, really. We’re going to take a peek through the gallery now, feel free to bring your drinks and grab some more along the way. And yeah, just enjoy yourselves. Thank you.” 

The clapping dwindled down as the group followed Minghao through the journey he went through over the past two years starting from just a week ago up until the beginning. 

Y/N stopped Seokmin to look at a very small white canvas decorated with various pastel water color paints mixed with an oil that looked almost the color of fresh blood. 

“Do you know when I did that?” 

“This?” 

Minghaos voice spoke up behind them quietly, not wanting the room to echo as the group was admiring the work during their part one journey. Seokmin smiled down at his female friend and decided to take the opportunity to wander off on his own like any good wingman would do. 

“Yeah.” 

“Uh, no. Is this a trick question?” 

“No it’s not, but it was that night I found you on your floor, looking at those pictures of you and your friends.” 

“I- You got inspired by that? How?” 

“Not sure I have time to explain it right now, but look at the title.” 

‘About you’ was written on the plaque to the right side of the artwork. 

“Wow. Thank you.” 

“No thank you, I couldn’t have finished any of this without you actually.” 

The art curator swooped Minghao away from your side moving the group into the second room, where the energy was colder, the lighting was turned down slightly, causing the fading colors the feel cold and dark and full of sadness especially coming from the front of the house that was bright and full of life. 

y/n was on her own now, sitting near the back of the group losing her sight of all her comfort blankets that were her friends. 

She spotted the red lip of Mimi directly across the room, also slipping to the back, trying to blend into the crowd as she looked around. 

After spending a good ten minutes looking around the group was led through a vinyl curtain into a room full of dark red lights, the canvases on the wall now sunk to the floor of the room and scattered themselves alongside ripped and tattered papers on the concrete floors.

Something in y/n’s stomach had told her she should leave now, the growing anxiety of the light and coldness of the room, with near to no talking as the faint look of paint splatter sunk into her eyes on the walls almost like old blood. 

She tried to turn around and make her exit through the same vinyl door when a hand came up to her wrist. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

“Oh, Mimi hi, shit you scared me. I actually don’t feel well. I was going to dip out for a second.” 

“Aw, come on y/n you can’t leave Minghao now. Not before the big finale.” 

“Right..” 

“Be right back, I’ll find Seokmin for you.” 

“Thank you.” 

All of the sudden as Mimi walked away a projector screen hit the wall, various old videos shot on a cam recorder. 

Y/n had recognized the faint pink colored walls, her own childhood room.

“Let’s go fucking crazy.”

The words came from lips that were set behind the camera only y/n knowing it was the sound of Mimi’s voice as she was being filmed sitting on the bed of her old room, a bottle of cheap vodka in her hands. 

“Okay, y/n I want you to see how pretty you are. We can send this to Joshua as a birthday gift. Should I turn the lights off more?” 

She watched herself as she nodded awkwardly giggling on top of the zebra sheets, her hands pushing the red bottle of liquor to her lips, dribbling the liquid down her chin, the sight of tears welling up in her round eyes.

“Y/nnie don’t be sad, nobody will ever find out we accidentally hurt anyone, okay? My dad said she’ll be okay, just a broken leg. Just let loose.” 

The lights flickered off the screen straight into her soul pushing down the memories of Mimi stealing her dads car while intoxicated to go and buy more alcohol before this very moment played out. 

Suddenly she saw red. All of this had been a set up to embarrass her. Another nail in her coffin. 

Her eyes filled with tears as she watched Mimi turn the people in the room to sit and stare at her face.  Watching the scene play on as Mimi told a very naive twenty year old girl to strip herself of her own clothes to impress the boy she liked and forget about the worst day of her life. 

The people in the room sized her up and down, some turning back to the screen, others reading a small handout that was stuffed into a map of the museum while giggling at the journal entries she wrote about her once crush and the man she had fallen for now before she even made the connection of who he was to her all of those years ago.

Y/n’s legs felt like jello, yet something in her built up the strength to bolt through the vinyl curtain, her heels echoing through the white walls like bullets hitting a glass window. 

She heard a voice cutting through the sound of her heels behind her calling out, but she decided she couldn’t stop to turn around and face anyone. It was a secret that couldn’t be shared, something that Mimi used as a final dagger to cut everyone out of her life the same way she cut the girl out of her own. 

As she reached the fresh air of the front doors, the same cute bartender was sitting out on the curb smoking a cigarette looking concerned for y/n’s well being. 

“Are you alright?” 

“No.” 

“Want a cigarette?” 

“A ride maybe? If it’s not too much to ask. I dropped my phone somewhere, I have cash I can pay you. I just need to get out of here now.” 

“I don’t need your money, it’s okay. Let me help you get a cab okay?” 

“Thank you, really. What’s your name?” 

“Rena. Yours?” 

“Y/n” 

Rena walked quickly with y/n to the outside cab pickup on the corner of the art museum, quickly hailing you a cab and shutting you tightly inside, leaving you with the last four cigarettes stuffed inside her metal case. As you drove off with a wink from her, meaning she had a feeling she’d see you again. 

“55 Miles Avenue, please” 

The driver sped through the night lights avoiding cars like it was a game. Pulling up outside the familiar front of Joshua’s building. 

Basically throwing money at him and whispering a quick thank you, y/n ran her way up to his elevator, finally reaching his floor, and knocking heavily on the door. 

In the few seconds he took to come unlock his apartment to her, she realized how desperate and deschevled she must look. 

“Y/n? It’s still early, are you okay?” 

“No.” 

“Come in, come in.” 

Her tears suddenly grew stronger, sinking down to his wooden floor, feeling his hands grab her shoulders and sink down with her. 

“What happened?” 

Words couldn’t form in her mouth correctly, she managed to spill a couple of sentences that made a way to fill him in. 

“Fuck. Y/n come on, let’s get you a shower and some fresh clothes.” 

Joshua’s arms picked the girl off the floor and led her into his black marble bathroom, which suddenly felt like an oasis to her. 

The water ran hot, scorching her body of the sins and embarrassment she had just gone through, spending more time scrubbing away at her skin and hair, feeling like it would help if she rubbed her skin nearly raw. 

Stepping out of the shower she grabbed the gray hoodie and soft sweatpants Joshua had laid out for her, taking her time to step into her clothes and walk out into her reality. 

“I ordered you some food. Come on.” 

As she finished eating in her daze, the boy to her left carefully rolled the thin paper over the green flower and lit the end, handing her a relief from her stress. 

“Thank you.” 

“Want to talk about it?” 

“Not right now.” 

“Okay. But im sorry I made you befriend her again, I should’ve known better y/n. I really thought she had changed.”

“Stop. Please, I really don’t want to talk about her right now.”

“Okay, just one last thing. Why do you think she did it?”

“I honestly have no idea.”

“But do you think Minghao had something to do with it I mean she basically ruined his whole night just for her own revenge. Seems weird that he-“

“Josh.”

“Okay. okay.”

Joshua and y/n sat in the haze of their shared joint, not talking until she finally had enough of a high to fall asleep next to him on the couch and chose to deal with her problems the next day. 

bonus:

note/s: part one of y/n’s wild ride fr. i feel like yall all know we can trust seok/bernon/wonu/junhui for sure 😌✊🏻 but for everyone else the jury (me) is still out lmao. IK MY ASS USED THE WRONG YOUR ok thank u lets just chalk it up to seokmin being drunk and silly lmao <3 i kept telling myself this is too rushed but i also didn’t want to overwhelm and put more of the drama here so lol. def prob typos etc etc bc i was editing at night which i def shouldn’t do anymore lmao. ok ttyl ily.

tag list:  @sun-daddy-yoriichi,@hipsdofangirl@kissesfrmwonwoo, @minhui896, @wonwooz1, porridgesblog,,  jasssy051, @soonyoungblr, @saucegirlreads, @musingsofananxiouspotato, @young-adult-summer, @punkhazardlaw, @bibs-world@the-swageyama-tobiyolo@wonuulvr@woozixo @k-drama-adict

[thesunfyre4446]

OMG I cannot take this anymore, I’m so tired of expressing my opinions on team black and getting backlash for it. TB supporters need to learn to not be so aggressive when it comes to defending their “Innocent” team. I’m not a green supporter either but I find myself sympathising more with those characters because I feel like they have reasons as to why they are what they are.

When I’m watching the show, I find myself disliking Rhaenyra. She constantly complains about being a female but yet she never does a thing to support her cause. In the books, I’ve heard she disinherits Lady Rosby and Lady Stokesworth on account of their genders and gives everything to their younger brothers. I did read the passage on which it says this and it was said that both girls were never named heir but they were the firstborn and is it not Rhaenyra’s movement to show that women can rule?

Back to her not doing anything about it, she does things, not a lot but the stuff she does do is extremely damaging to her image yet she still acts on them impulsively; Going to the street of silk with Daemon which leads to her marriage with laenor WHICH leads to her bastard children. Had she just not gone and not interacted with Daemon, she could have picked what man she got to marry, it didn’t necessarily have to be love but she could of picked one that could perform their duty and she could be friendly with. She could have done this because her father was allowing her to pick which was rare in those days and just further proves that Visery’s would ignore the customs for her.

I truly do agree with Viserys when he mentions that Jeaharys would have disinherited her and I don’t think Rhaenyra realises how lucky she is to have him as a father. She abandoned him for 6 years, knowing he was dying of an illness and only comes back to beg him to get out his bed and put himself in pain to defend her which he does because he loves her. Adding onto this, Rhaenyra expects to come back to kings landing and everyone to just follow her just because she was named heir, she didn’t stay there to prove her worth or anything. She left it for the greens to manipulate and take over and she is mad that she has no allies there when she’s the one the went into hiding. She’s been named heir for around 20 years at this point, most of the men that swore to her are dead and like they said in the show, most of those oaths are stale now.

The greens are definitely more politically savvy than the blacks which is how they gained so much support, had Rhaenyra stayed in the court and worked on making allies and proving her worth to the realm then maybe the Dance wouldn’t have started. Her hiding away in dragon stone also definitely helped the greens to take the throne because had she been in kings landing then she could have known straight away that her father was dead and the greens would have had a harder time getting the throne, but she left it open for the taking and gets mad when it is taken.

Forgive me for all this, I’m just so incredibly annoyed right now.

i completely agree with you, anon. some TB stans are just impossible to talk too. i usually love it when people with different opinions that mine leave comments on my posts, but i've gotten soooo many disgusting and disturbing messages calling me names, being racist, being incredible misogynistic towards alicent and just being very weird and aggressive.

idk it's very weird how personally TB stans take the criticism towards rhaenyra and daemyra. i mean, daemon gr00med and choked her - a lot of people are obvs NOT going to support this couple and find it very problematic.

i'm not a huge rhaenyra fan too . her character is kinda boring for me, she's giving me an overprivileged-rich-soccer-mom vibes. and yeah she def was not politically savvy (part of the reason i dislike her lol) and made a lot of mistakes. i think that rhaenyra is def a product of viserys's bad parenting skills. he never prepared her to rule, always justified and defended her mistakes (i mean, how are you going to grow as a person when your daddy defends everything you do no matter what?) and he gave her a false sense of security.

[stitcherofchaos]

I just realize something that made my blood boil.

You know how a lot of people in the fandom hate how Maglor had mercy on Elrond and Elrond and raised them as his own?

And how they try to twist and pervert that relationship into something abusive, selfish, and/or manipulative?

What if it was Maedhros?

And why do I feel like if it was him, everyone would be at his defense and write fan fictions, draw fanart, and love this family dynamic more than when it was Maglor?

Why does Maglor seem to have the most issues in the Silmarillion fandom, more than Maedhros?

Why do many people try to make Maglor into an even worse person than Maedhros despite what- albeit little- canon lore said about him?

Lastly, why did Tolkien make so many changes and switch so many things about those two in order make their characters consistent? Not to mention actually giving them character arcs…

You know, I’m staring to think that if Maedhros had found Elured and Elurín- and quite possibly raised them- the whole fandoms would’ve equally supported that dynamic.

I’m also guessing by the reason the fandom seems to like and defend Maedhros so much is because he is the ‘hot ginger’ out of the two brothers.

After all, you can project whatever you want out of a ‘blank page’, but you can’t touch the so-called ‘masterpiece’.

I’m not attacking anyone, I don’t want to attack anyone, heck maybe I’m wrong and all of Tolkien’s words are misleading from his true vision. I’m attempting to defend and respect the material that he worked so hard on, and sadly never finished.

Oh and just to be PERFECTLY clear, Maglor is not a good person, neither is Maedhros!

I just want the facts to be made clear. Maglor is a son of Feanor, a fierce killer, who committed 3 kinslayings! That is not the topic I’m discussing.

This is about the guilt, sorrow, and compassion he expressed for two orphaned boys at the end of the last kinsalying.

“For Maglor took pity upon Elrond and Elrond, and he cherished them, as little might be thought, but Maglor’s heart was sick and weary with the burden of the dreadful oath.”

- J R.R. Tolkien

[avatarmerida]

Til You Make It

Okay so this was something I wanted to have finished for Valentines Day (and it shows) but then idk I just didn’t. But I wanted to finish it and at some point it became way longer than a drabble but I don’t have enough to do like a full multi chapter story so here’s some corny huntlow fake dating that’s king for no reason. Idk how I feel about it but maybe it’s just because I’ve been staring at it too long. Okay byyyyyeeee.

----

“...and then you pick truth or dare and we keep going back and forth like that,” Gus finished explaining the rules of the game. The boys had such a fun time sharing a room in the human realm they decided to have a sleepover and Gus was walking Hunter through the difference between sharing a room and sleeping over. The main difference was the games you played, according to Gus.

“Okay so I guess… truth?” Hunter said tentatively as they sat on the ground in front of Gus’ bed, their new matching Cosmic Frontier sleeping bags laid neatly beneath them.

“Okaaay,” Gus sang with a mischievous grin. “Tell me a secret…”

“Oh, well I don’t think we have any secrets anymore, I mean after everything that’s happened I think you must know most-.”

“... about Willow.” Gus finished, raising his eyebrow.

“Why would I know one of Willow’s secrets?” Hunter stuttered nervously. “A-and even if I did, I would never divulge one without her permission. Why would you-.”

“I’m preeeetty sure you have at least one secret involving Willow,” Gus cut him off as he reached for his juice box sitting on the nightstand. By now, Hunter’s massive crush on their friend was old news but Gus knew Hunter was making some progress, but getting him to open up about it presented its challenges. He thought this was the perfect game to get the ball rolling or at least see where the ball was. “But if you would rather do a dare…”

“No! No, it’s fine.” Hunter said, taking a deep breath. “There actually… is something I’ve been wanting to talk about. But everything stays confidential, right?”

“I’ll take the solemn vow of secrecy that Avery pledged to O’Bailey.” Gus said with a serious face that put Hunter at ease, knowing the severity of the oath. 

“Okay,” Hunter took another deep breath as he fiddled with his thumbs. “Right before… everything happened, I sent Willow a message…”

“Okaaay?” Said Gus, prompting him to continue. “What about?”

“I uh, well… we had been messaging a lot and I… really liked talking to her and she asked if I could push up my next day off so we could hang out and I said I might be able to after the Day of Unity and I said maybe we could even… goonadate.”

“What?!” Gus exclaimed, spitting out his juice. “Are you serious?!”

“That was before I knew what the Day of Unity really was!” Hunter sputtered. 

“I know that!” Said Gus, saving his mouth with a napkin. “I’m talking about you asking Willow out! Dude, that’s huge!”

“I know!” Hunter exclaimed, reaching for a pillow to scream into. “I nearly threw my scroll across the room afterwards. I-I don't know what came over me I just… said it! I didn’t really know what it meant! Darius joked about it, about me asking her on a date and so I just asked him what that meant and he said it was two people who liked each other spending time together alone and I… liked how it sounded. I didn’t really know about the romantic part until after but even then I… I think I still would’ve asked.”

“Hmm, I bet you would have,” Gus said with a smirk. “But, wait, why haven’t you guys gone on one?” Gus gave a little gasp. “Did she say no?”

“She never replied,” sighed Hunter. “Granted, it was late and she did mention she was tired so she might’ve fallen asleep. But then ya, know alot of stuff happened and then when I saw you guys at Hexside, I didn’t have my scroll to see if she saw it or responded. I mean, there was really no good time to bring it up! And I thought she didn’t bring it up because… maybe she did say no.”

“Well you have your scroll now! Did she ever reply?”

“Not to that message,” said Hunter, pulling it up and scrolling through a sea of messages. “After that it's mostly ‘are you okay?’ And ‘why are there scouts at the Owl House?’ She changed the subject, probably to let me down easy.”

“Or because she was worried about your safety?” Gus offered, knowing that was the real answer. “If we wanna know if she got it, we gotta ask her!”

Hunter’s eyes widened in panic. “No! There’s too many variables! What if she was gonna say no? What if she never saw it but would’ve said no? What if she said yes but she’s changed her mind? What if-?”

“What if she said ‘sure, when?’ but it never sent and she thinks that you left her on read?” Gus countered and Hunter gasped at the very notion.

“I would never!” He hissed. “Willow knows that! She knows… doesn’t she?”

“There’s only one way to find out,” said Gus.

“But… what if I waited too long and she lost interest or never had interest and I’ll just make her uncomfortable if I talk about it-.”

“Dude, stop.” Gus said firmly, cutting him off before he totally spiraled. “Even if Willow doesn’t like you that way, she’s still your friend and cares about you. She would never try to make you feel bad about having feelings.”

“You’re right Gus,” Hunter sighed, looking fondly at the profile picture of Willow smiling brightly back at him. “I should just come clean and express my feelings more directly.”

“Exactly!”

“In a handwritten note!” Hunter declared with flair.

“That’s… a start.”

---

So Hunter drafted his love note.

And then it turned into more of a novel, so he revised it so it wasn’t so overwhelming and got it down to a respectable page and a half. He carried it with him everywhere, waiting for the right moment. He had selected a simple light green envelope and doodled tiny flowers in the corners, as though he was worried the elegant way he wrote her name on the front in bold gold ink wasn’t clue enough that it was meant for her. 

He needed to ensure there was no confusion about whether or not she saw it.

---

“Guys, guys guys!” said Hunter in a panicky tone as he rushed to the lunch table with Gus and Willow sat and had just been wondering where he was. He quickly sat down beside Willow and lowered his voice as though he was on the run, his hazel eyes overrun with guilt. “I did something bad.”

“Cool! What?” asked Willow, in the middle of opening a pudding cup.

“Well, I was on my way here and I ran into Boscha-

“Ew.” said Willow, naturally. 

“And she… asked me out.” Hunter winced before proceeding to explain as fast as he could.  “And of course I said no but she wouldn’t drop it until I gave her a good reason so I panicked and I sort of lied and said that you’re my girlfriend so she’d leave me alone.” 

“Oh.” Willow said as Hunter examined her face for the disapproval he assumed his confession would warrant, but she seemed more focused on the stubborn top of her pudding. “So what’s the bad thing you did?” 

“I-I lied!” Hunter said, as though she had not heard.

“Yeah, to Boscha.” Willow shrugged, saying the name like it left a bad taste in her mouth.

“But I lied about you!”

“Yeah, to Boscha,” Willow repeated again with a small laugh. “Hunter, I know better than anyone how persistent Boscha can be. If lying about me being your girlfriend gets her to leave you alone, I’m more than fine with it.”

“Really?” 

“Really.” Willow assured him, finally opening the cup and placing the pudding in front of him before turning to open her own. She knew he was always running late to lunch because he had a habit of staying after class to ask follow up questions and the run in with Boscha had only delayed him more. 

“Oh, okay…”

“Ya know, I’m surprised Boscha would ask you out,” chuckled Willow before fully hearing how her words could be taken. Her eyes widened in a slight panic and she raised her hands as she tried to explain. “Not that I don’t understand wanting to date you! No, it’s just that I’m surprised Boscha could see how amazing you are! She doesn’t normally have such great taste. I mean uh, well you know what I mean.”

“Heh, yeah,” said Hunter, sipping the drink Gus had brought him as he tried not to think too much into what she said. Not that I don’t understand wanting to date you…

“Okay, I get not wanting to date Boscha but why did you say you were dating Willow?” asked Gus.

“Well who else was I supposed to say?”

“Literally anyone else?” said Gus, fully aware that Willow was often already on Hunter’s mind and it was most likely the result of a reflex or wishful thinking. “Or like, don’t give her a name? You could’ve said she went to a different school or something. Even if Boscha did respect boundaries, you know how she treats Willow. She’ll probably try and break you up just to hurt her.”

“Hmmm maybe not,” said Willow, a thought forming behind her eyes. 

“What do you mean?” asked Gus.

“Well, she might try to break us up,” started Willow. “Ooor she might be too embarrassed for anyone to know that Hunter would rather go out with half-a-witch Willow over her.”

“I mean, I guess that’s not a lie,” Hunter reasoned. “Except for the half-a-witch part.” He reached over and placed his hand over hers and looked seriously into her eyes. “Please don’t call yourself that.”

Willow’s eyes fluttered from his hand on hers up to his face, looking at her with total sincerity, his value of her outweighing any nerves that could accompany the action. She felt like a butterfly was loose in her chest, flying rapidly around in her ribcage. 

“Ya know, I bet if she saw you holding my hand she would lose her mind,” said Willow with a mischievous grin, loving both parts of the sentence. 

“Oh! Uh, well yeah … I guess?” stuttered Hunter, not sure if he should remove his hand or not. “I mean, that’s not why I-.”

“I mean, if I’m gonna be your fake girlfriend then it’s gonna look convincing,” Willow decided, instantly onboard. “We should probably hold hands alot more, especially if we just started dating; we’ll have to be even more obnoxious than Amity and Luz.”

“Is that even possible?”

“Well, let’s find out,” said Willow slyly, turning her hand over to lace her fingers with Hunter’s. She continued to eat her lunch as though this multitasking was second nature. “Oh yeah, Boscha would hate this.”

“Haha yeah,” Hunter laughed nervously, unable to fully process what was happening but knowing it felt very nice. He put his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his other hand as he admired their connected hands as he tried to convincingly convey a  teenager in love. “She’d totally hate this.” he sighed with a dopey grin. .

“You know I’d do anything for you, right?” Willow smiled. “And if sticking it to Boscha is a part of helping you, well how could I say no?”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know it wasn’t the smartest thing to-.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” Willow insisted. “It’s kinda perfect actually, she was being a pest yesterday about how I didn’t have a date for Bleeding Hearts Day. It’s really none of her business but it’ll be kind of nice getting to see her face when it turns out that I do.”

“Oh, right.” 

“It kind of sounds like fun, actually, like an undercover mission. We can meet after school to plan our fake relationship, sound good?”

“S-sure, yeah.” 

“Well, I gotta go check on my bulbs before next period  to make sure they’re adjusting to their new soil, but wanna walk to class together, boyfriend?” She said the term in such an overly sweet way, Hunter thought his teeth might fall out. She said it the same way she would say his name when she thought he was keeping a secret that she knew she could work it out of him with very little effort. Was it because they shared a secret now or did she know something else was up? Either way, he wanted to hear her say it over and over again. 

“Oh, uh y-yeah of course!” He chuckled nervously. “We can uh hold hands too I guess…” he sheepishly sipped his drink and Willow just giggled, knowing he had not intended to get himself into this situation and felt out of place not being prepared. But luckily her mind was racing with solutions. 

“You betcha,” she confirmed, rising from the table and giving him a playful wink. “I’ll meet you by your locker?”

“I’ll be there!” he said with enthusiasm, waving to Willow as she walked away keeping his eyes on her until she left the cafeteria entirely. “Oh Titan I’ve made things worse.”  Hunter groaned into his hands once he knew Willow was out of earshot. 

“Sooo what happened to giving her the note?” Gus asked, taking a bite of his sandwich.“Isn’t this like skipping a few steps?”

“I-I don’t know! It all happened so fast!” Hunter mumbled. “I was about to put the note in Willow’s locker when Boscha walked by and took it from me!  She saw Willow’s name on the front and went to rip it up and hen I asked her not to, she read it. She read it in this ugly high pitched voice and threatened to tell everyone and I… panicked.”

“What did the note say exactly?”

Hunter’s face turned a bright shade of crimson, having intended for the note to remain personal and having it exposed once already today was a lot. “It… just said that I liked her and I wanted to see if she wanted to see a professional flyer derby game with me for Bleeding Hearts Day.” Hunter summarized, the real note had been hard enough to condense as he wanted to make sure he covered all his bases and thoroughly expressed his feelings. 

“Aww, Willow would love that!”

“Right?! Then Bocha tried to turn it into something bad like I should be embarrassed about liking her but I’m not. But she could tell I was embarrassed about something and so she threatened to tell everyone and I didn’t want Willow to find out from her so… I said that she was already my girlfriend. I mean, Luz and Amity send each other notes like that all the time so it’s believable, right?”

“So Boscha didn’t really ask you out?”

“No.” Hunter buried face in his hands and groaned. “Ugh, and I lied to Willow too! But I didn’t know how to explain to Willow why I lied to Boscha without telling her everything and now…”

“Now you get to show Willow what a great boyfriend you’d be.” Gus finished.

“What?”

“I mean, maybe you didn’t totally blow it,” Gus continued. “I mean, Willow didn’t seem upset about people thinking she was your girlfriend. Maybe that’s a good thing?”

“But it’s pulling her into my lie!” Hunter said. “Relationships shouldn’t be based on lies!”

“I mean, you tried pulling her into a coven and she still likes you,” Gus pointed out, as he continued to chew. “Fake it til you make it, right?”

“Right,” said Hunter with a small, uneasy smile. “Fake it til you make it.”

—-

“Hey boyfriend.” Willow smiled as she turned the corner to see Hunter gathering his books. Hearing her refer to him like that made his knees feel weak. It sounded so natural.

“Hey g-girlfriend,” he said, trying to summon the same confidence she had. But the word felt almost forbidden. But very nice. “H-how are your plants?”

“They’re great!” She exclaimed. “Thanks for asking, what a sweet attentive boyfriend I have.”

Hunter blushed, he had always asked her about her plants. 

“So Luz, Amity, and I are practically rom com experts,” said Willow proudly. “That, plus being around the two of them nonstop, makes me confident that I have the expertise to ensure that we can be a very convincing couple.”

“I mean, we would only have to be a couple around Bocha right? And we aren’t around Boscha that much so you don’t have to put yourself out for me.”

“Nonsense!” Willow insisted. “You’re still getting used to things but I know how high school works. Word travels fast, everyone is looking for gossip. We can’t risk the mission crumbling due to carelessness.” Her voice dived into a serious whisper that lured Hunter down to hear her better, her tone covered him in a sense of urgency as though this truly was the mission of a lifetime. “There are eyes everywhere.”

“Of course, Captain,” he said with a serious nod, his voice low and gravely which sent a chill down Willow’s spine.

“I won’t lie, there may be challenges,” said Willow embracing the theatrics of the moment. “After last time, Boscha will be looking for any reason to try and prove that I-.”

“‘Last time?’” Hunter asked. “What do you mean ‘last time?’” 

He knew he wasn’t referring to their scuffle at New Hexside. He knew Willow’s history with Bosha was complicated, but had he done something to worsen it?

“Okay, listen it’s not a big deal,” Willow began in a forced tone that suggested it definitely was. “But last year ago before Luz even got here, there was someone in a few of my classes that I kind of had a crush on,” she fiddled with her braid as she cleared her throat. “I thought they were really nice and cute but I was shy so I didn’t really have the confidence to talk to them. So I wrote a note to tell them how I felt and put it in their locker. A few days later they wrote me back and they… asked me to go to Grom.”

“And you said yes?”

Willow nodded. “I was really excited, I had never been asked out on a date before,” she recalled. “I even saved up to buy a new dress. And my dads were maybe even more excited than me, they were gonna take hundreds of pictures, and they waited with me for them to come pick me up like they said they would. And we waited, and waited, and waited. But they never showed up.”

“Did something happen to them?”

“When I asked them about it at school the next day…they just laughed. They laughed like it was the most ridiculous joke they had ever heard, going to a dance with me. Turns out, it was. They were never gonna show up for me because they had never really asked me. The note was from Boscha.”

 “No!”

Willow took a deep breath, it had been awhile since she had shared this story. “Yeah. She had somehow found out about the note and sent the fake one as a prank so I’d either show up and be humiliated or miss the dance all together. Kind of a win-win for her.”

“Willow, that’s awful.” said Hunter, feeling as though he was about to cry, sorry he was causing her to relive the painful memory. He wondered if Boscha had been planning to repeat herself when she caught Hunter trying to leave Willow his note. He shuddered at the idea of her getting a note like that thinking it was from him. His galdertone ached at the idea that she could've gotten his note and thought it was written as a cruel joke. 

“So it took me awhile to trust myself when I started liking someone, and even longer to believe that someone could ever like me like that.” said Willow. 

“Willow I'm so sorry that happened to you, that’s just… you don’t… Oh, I’m sorry I got you involved in this,” said Hunter. “I-I don’t know why I did, I mean I knew how Boscha treated you, I should've known she’d find a way to try and-.”

“Hunter, it’s fine really,” Willow assured him. “I know I still let Boscha get under my skin sometimes, but I know this time is nothing like that. Plus I’d hate for her to try and do something like that to you. We’re not doing this to prove anything to her, it’s to keep her away from you. But if she found out that we were pretending… she’d be unbearable.”

“I mean she’s already unbearable,” Hunter scoffed. 

“I won’t argue with you there,” said Willow with a light chuckle.

“So… have you liked anyone… since then?” Hunter tried to ask naturally.

“Um… maybe?” A subtle blush crept onto her face and she hoped he didn't notice. He thought he imagined it. “There is… someone I kind of…”

“There is?” Hunter's heart plummeted as his eyes widened in horror. “Oh my Titan, there’s someone you like and now I’ve roped you into dating me and now they’ll think you’re taken! Willow, I’m so sorry! If you wanna break up with me I can always see if-.”

“No! No, no it’s okay,” Willow insisted. “I think they’d understand. It’s fine, I promise.”

“You’re sure?”

“Absolutely,” she said sweetly. “I’m fairly certain that pretending to date you will not hurt my chances with him.”

“Okay,” Hunter sighed, confused and relieved. His mind raced with who this person would be, this lucky, mysterious, and apparently very secure person who Willow had her eye on. He didn’t ask more questions, not wanting to pry and not wanting to increase the creeping feeling of jealousy lurking in his chest. 

“Ya know, this will be my first Bleeding Hearts day with someone, even if it’s not totally legit,” mused Willow. “It’s still exciting though. It’ll be nice to spend it with someone I care about.”

“Yeah?” Hunter asked, unable to process that she had referred to him as someone special without air quotes or sarcasm. She really was looking forward to spending time with him on the most romantic day on the Isles? He had to make it worth her sacrifice. Luckily, he had the perfect day planned for months. “Well then, if you’re not doing anything already I was thinking we could go to a pro flyer derby match together.”

Her eyes sparkled. “Really? I would love- wait, do you mean the match on Bleeding Hearts day between the Sirens and the Harpies?”

“Yeah! I-if that’s okay….” Hunter started, pulling the tickets out of his pocket where he had been keeping them safe. “I actually already got us pretty good seats, so if you-.”

“Hunter!” Willow exclaimed, taking them carefully from him to admire them. “Are you serious? How did you ever… I mean this is so… I don’t even know what to say! This is so amazing I could just kiss you!”

“Hehehe uh well I guess technically you could…” he said quietly as he scratched his face. Willow was too engrossed in the tickets for Hunter to tell if she had heard him. “But I uh, got them as a thank you. For, ya know, being my… girlfriend.”

Willow smiled as she wrapped him in a tight hug, burying her face in his chest as she lifted him off the ground. “So that does that mean… you wanna go?” he strained to ask as she squeezed him tighter. She laughed as she gently put him back on his feet, taking delight in the red mesmerized look on his face. 

“Of course! What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn’t?” She giggled, only slightly embarrassed at her impulse.She knew it was for show, but truthfully she couldn’t imagine a better evening than yelling in the crowd beside Hunter. How had Boscha managed to accidentally arrange one of the most perfect nights of her life? She was finally good for something, it seemed.

---

Pretending to date Hunter was unsurprisingly easy. 

They spent the day adjusting their routine to that of a couple, and it turns out they needed to adjust very little.

They already went out of their way to walk to class together, so now they walked closer and linked pinkies as they walked. 

When he dropped her off at her class, she always sent him away with an enthusiastic farwell, now she blew him a kiss before he left.

During study hall he sent her paragraphs worth of ideas for pet names. Terms of endearment tailor made for Willow that she couldn’t help but feel he thought of way too quickly, as though he already had them handy.

Such little things that made the biggest difference

During their time in the human realm, they would create little backstories for themselves to help them blend in and get adjusted to things. It was something silly they did to take their mind off the uncertainty of things and help the time pass, but now it was just a silly thing they did for reasons they couldn’t explain. Willow knew  plenty of couples weren’t overly affectionate and they didn’t need to go so deep undercover, but she was willing to commit to the bit as much as he was. It was another thing they would do back in human realm, see who would break first or who would be the first to have nothing new to add. But this was one time Willow was hoping for a draw.

 All through class she watched the clock, so eager to see him again and add another detail to their story. Her favorite part was when the bit reached a point where it felt like an elaborate inside joke that blurred the lines between fact and fiction. Hunter was always the best at creating with her. Sometimes it took him awhile to find the character, but if his Golden Guard days taught him anything it was how to adapt. 

---

At the end of their first day “together”, any guilt Hunter harbored had vanished with Willow's collection of ideas suggesting she really was excited for this plan. If only asking her for real could be this simple. As they walked to the Owl House for their usual Friday hang chatting as they always did, they did so hand in hand only to remember halfway there that since they were out of school they didn’t technically need to be. But neither said this aloud. They were both convinced the other was simply dedicated to the ruse.

“... and I thought we could go official on penstagram but we have to do matching profile pictures first,” continued Willow. “I thought we could do one where we’re each doing like half a heart with our hands so when the ‘in a relationship’ update happens they’ll be next to each other and it’ll look so cute.” 

Hunter had made it clear that he was fine with whatever Willow was comfortable with and he assumed that meant they would hold hands in the hallway for a couple of weeks (which was more than enough to make his head spin) but she was fine with everyone on the Isles thinking they were romantically involved. He knew Boshca didn’t have so much influence that the effort was necessary, but he convinced himself that Willow was simply covering all their bases.

It was for the bit.

As they reached the front door, Hooty was absent from his usual spot which signaled to Willow and Hunter that the weekend festivities were in full swing. Willow went to open the door with her free hand when suddenly a thought struck her and she turned to her co conspirator with a look of concern.

“Hunter, you did tell Luz we were only pretending to be dating, right?”

“I didn’t tell her anything,” he said, having not seen Luz since this morning when she saw them off before heading to her school in the human realm. “Only Gus knows that we’re pretending. I haven’t even talked to her since this morning, I don’t even know how she would know.”

“Oh Titan.” Willow said, the color draining from her face. “I think we might be in trouble.”

“Why would you say that?” Hunter asked as he opened the door for Willow and the answer to his question presented itself as they were instantly ambushed by the force that was Hooty. The bird tube wrapped them into a tight hug, crying about how excited he was for them as Hunter and Willow saw he was not alone in his sentiment. 

“Congratulations to the happy couple!” Luz exclaimed as Hooty loosened his grip on them so she could toss confetti in their faces. 

“Oh, that’s why.” Hunter whispered to Willow as they both regulated their breathing after being stuck in Hooty’s grip.  All they could do now was smile awkwardly as they both took in the display Luz had prepared. A “congratulations” sign hung behind Luz in the doorway, the letters decorated in pink, purple and blue and then pink, yellow and blue. They had set up Eda’s old projector and a slideshow of pictures of Willow and Hunter played on what appeared to be a loop. There were a decent amount. It was just the kind of celebration a new couple would really appreciate.

If only they were a real couple.

It also happened to include nearly everyone from school, so correcting Luz right away wasn’t an option.

“Wow this is so… uh, you guys really shouldn’t have,” said Willow as she took it all in. She didn’t dislike it, no that wasn’t it. Hunter tried to place her tone, thinking that by the redness in her cheeks she might be embarrassed. If he didn’t know any better he might think she was… committing to the bit. That’s all it was. 

But he couldn’t help but feel as though everyone had been expecting this celebration to take place sooner or later. 

“Are you kidding? It’s not everyday your best friend starts dating your brother!” said Luz as she pulled them both into a hug,and they looked at each other nervously behind her back. She leaned back to offer them both a wide smile, practically jumping out of her skin as Amity joined her. 

“Yeah! It’ll be nice to go on double dates!”

“Oh man, if I had known your crush didn’t go away, I would’ve set this up months ago!” added Luz.

Their eyes widened simultaneously, each thinking Luz was referring to them only, unaware how mutual the feeling was. They spoke at the same time, hoping to move on before she revealed too much. 

“Oh! Well you know we don’t have to-.”

“Actually, we were thinking that-.”

“Hey there lovebirds!” Gus said, rushing in to save the day. “Why don’t you come to the kitchen and get some pizza?”

“Yes! Yes, of course!” said Hunter, happy for the save as he took Willow’s hand before following Gus back. “My girlfriend loves pizza!”

“Awh, look at them,” sighed Luz, resting her head on Amity’s shoulder. “He knows that she loves pizza.”

Once in the kitchen, sure no one was listening in, Hunter turned to Gus in a panic but the younger boy simply offered him a calm, knowing look.

“Gus, why didn’t you tell them we were just pretending?” whispered Hunter.

“I didn’t have time!” he said. “I showed up and Luz told me before I could even say hello!”

“Well who told Luz?” asked Willow. 

“Who didn’t tell Luz?” laughed Gus. “Someone saw you two holding hands and one thing led to another and by the time I got here Luz had already talked to half the school. I didn’t wanna blow your cover so I went with it. I just assumed you two were just doing another bit like we used to do all the time.”

“Gus, this isn’t like trying to convince the lady at the flower shop that Willow used to be an actual willow tree and that’s why she can make the plants grow,” said Hunter. “This is serious!”

“Hunter, it’ll be fine,” assured Willow, placing her hand on his shoulder. “We can always explain things to her after, we just need to do some extra pretending tonight. If it’s too hard, we can always leave early.”

Hunter wasn’t worried about it being too hard, he was worried about it being too easy. He was worried Luz would let it slip exactly why it was too easy for him. Luz had honed in on his crush early on, maybe even before he was aware of it, and it stood to reason that she believed Willow was also aware of it now. How do you tell someone your girlfriend doesn’t know about your crush on her?

“Right,” he said, grateful for Willow’s support. They had been through worse, through deadlier and more dire things, surely they could survive a night of awkwardness. 

Surely they could survive the flyer derby team’s stream of questions as Willow convinced them they kept it secret as to avoid drama on the team.

Surely they could survive everyone at the party mentioning how they knew it all along.

Surely they could survive the video Luz had somehow made (dare they assume she had it prepared in advance?) to summarize their relationship becoming official. As they sat on the coach, watching every picture he and Willow had ever taken together move along the screen while a song neither of them had ever heard played softly in the background. From the corner of his eye he watched Willow watch as the screen zoom in on a group photo where he was standing beside her looking at her with a faint blush as she pulled him into frame, her hand tight on his waist. 

Her finger twirled her braid as he failed to read her expression for how she was feeling. He didn’t want to feel overwhelmed if she wasn’t. With the other bits, he always followed her lead. But the difference was that he had been the one to rope them into this one. And it wasn’t something they were doing to fool a stranger they would only see for five minutes, this was basically everyone they knew. 

But she didn’t seem to mind.

She actually really seemed to like it.

“Don’t worry I made you copy to show your dads when you tell them.” Said Luz as the presentation came to an end, proud of her work. “I mean, unless you’ve already told them.”

“Well, we-.”

“Oh, they must’ve,” interrupted Amity. “I know how strict they are about this type of thing, there’s no way Hunter would ask Willow out without their blessing.”

“Oh, actually-.”

“That’s right!” Hunter interrupted this time. “I did ask them! And they said… no!”

“They said no?” Amity asked, surprised.

“What?” said Luz and Gus together. 

“Wait, did you- I mean, yes! That’s right!” Said Willow, catching on. “He asked them and they said no but we are dating anyway! So it’s a secret!” 

“Yeah! We are secretly dating!” Confirmed Hunter. “So we should not mention it to them. Because of the secret aspect of it.”

“Oh, yeah of course.” Said Amity .

“Yeah, we won’t say anything.” promised Luz. 

“Good, because we-.”

“Why did they say no?” Amity asked. 

“Huh?”

“I mean, it’s kind of odd, right?” She went on, stroking her chin. “I mean, they seem like they really like Hunter and they always tease you about him being your boyfriend, so what changed?”

“Uh…” Willow thought nervously, having not told Hunter about all the time her dads had “accidentally” referred to him as her boyfriend when his name came up (which was honestly quite often). “They caught us… kissing?”

“Kissing?! You two have kissed already and neither of you told me???” Luz exclaimed. “How long have you been going out that you’re already kissing?”

“Uh, well…” Hunter tried to start, starting to sweat. He and Willow had established a fairly thorough cover story, but they had never discussed this. Even hypothetical, Hunter knew he couldn’t muster the courage to bring it up to Willow. But now it was all he could think about. Between imagining that and trying to create a story in which it could believably happen, Hunter felt as though he was about to malfunction. 

“Two weeks ago,” said Willow calmly.

“What?!” Luz exclaimed.

“What? I mean, yeah! We kissed two weeks ago!” said Hunter with a nervous laugh. 

“Well? C’mon! Do we not get a story?”

“Um it uh was… a day-.” started Hunter.

“It was after our match against Glandus, it had gone into double overtime so it was late and Hunter was walking me home like he always does,” started Willow, to a room of “awhs” and “how sweet.” “But we were still taking our time, talking  about the game and then all of a sudden, clouds start forming and we realize it’s gonna rain. We’re almost to my house so Hunter picks me up and uses his teleportation to rush me to the door before a drop can hit me. So then we’re standing on my porch and he’s standing really close so the rain won’t hit him and he just looks so cute… I dunno, I guess it was the adrenaline or something but I just pulled him down and kissed him.”

“Awh, that’s so sweet,” said Luz, brushing a tear away. “A first kiss in the boiling rain? It’s like something out of a book.”

“Yeah,” said Hunter, looking over at Willow. He remembered that day. It wasn’t something Willow invented to help sell their lie. They had gone into overtime and he had walked her home and he had rushed her onto her porch before the rain statered, But in reality, they had lingered there. He remembered their faces inches from each other, close enough to feel her breath on his face. She had been close enough that pulling him down would’ve been easy. And he thought about it, he did. Or at least, he knew this was the kind of moment where that kind of thing happened. They stood in silence for a few moments and he told himself later that it was because they wanted to make sure they were safely out of the rain. But truthfully he forgot about the rain, he could only focus on the lingering face paint clinging to the sides of Willow’s glasses and how he was close enough to see it so clearly. How he was close enough to… 

But her dads had opened the door and welcomed the pair inside for a celebratory dinner before that possibility could be explored 

That was the only thing she changed.

She didn’t need to pick that moment, she could have invented something totally new and Hunter would've gone along with it. But the fact that she did… well Hunter didn’t know what that meant. She would often sneak little jokes into their larger ones, but was this a joke within a joke or a reimagining?

“Yeah,” said Hunter, his voice soft and dreamy, transported to Willow’s improved version of the day. “That’s… that’s what happened.”

“So uh, actually we’d better get going,” said Willow, sitting up as she sensed Hunter was growing overstimulated. “Ever since then, they’ve been really strict about my curfew. And I know Hunter has a potions essay to work on.”

“Oh okay!” said Luz as she wrapped them both in a tight hug. “But I will be texting you a million follow up questions. You too, Hunter.”

“Cool, sure,” said Hunter, knowing that meant he and Willow would be on a video call making sure their answers lined up. He hated to think that he was enjoying inconveniencing her so much. 

“Now go walk your girlfriend to the door, I bet you wanna kiss her goodnight,” teased Luz and everyone in the room let out an ohhhh

“Haha! You bet!” Said Hunter with forced enthusiasm, his voice cracking ever so slightly  as he felt the room get hotter. “Willow! Let me walk you outside and we can kiss like we always do!”

Willow smiled in spite of herself  and followed Hunter outside, waving goodbye to her friends as to keep up appearances. She couldn’t help but take a little delight in how nervous Hunter was. She always really liked that part of the bit.

“How are we gonna convince them we’re out here kissing?” Hunter whispered on the verge of a panic attack as the door shut behind them (luckily Hooty promised them privacy). “I can see Luz peeping through the curtains. 

“Like this,” said Willow calmly, placing her hands on either side of his face and pulling him down close to her. As she did, she sneakily placed her thumbs over his lips and placed her lips against her thumbs, a nearly invisible barrier to the nosey on lookers inside

It was fake and staged but Hunter couldn’t help the way his heart raced, still being so close to her. He knew he had to sell his end but he didn’t know how to look like someone who was casual about kissing Willow Park. So he did the only thing he could think of and kept his arms at his sides, lest they do the wrong thing. He didn’t know if this was right, but he knew he wouldn’t know what was right so that made it right, right?

She closed her eyes and so he did too. He heard her hum and his lips formed a smile against her thumbs as their noses brushed against each other. 

When she pulled away she gave him a small wink and patted his cheek to signify it had worked. It really had. No one at the party could deny that he was head over heels for Willow Park. Absolutely no one.

“Oh, okay,” he said, not knowing what to say but feeling like he should say something. “Uh… thanks.”

“Sure, yeah,” she said, trying to remain composed. There was no reason not to be, nothing had happened.  “Anytime.”

It was just like that day on her porch. 

-

“Why do you bring Willow flowers everyday?” Gus asked 

“I don’t bring her flowers every day,” corrected Hunter as he handed Willow a small bouquet. “I mostly bring her seeds and clippings so she can grow her own flowers.”

“But why?”

“Because Willow loves plants? It’s kinda her whole thing? Well, that and-.”

“No I mean, why do you bring Willow flowers if you’re not actually dating?” Asked Gus.

“Because if I was really dating Willow I would try and bring her flowers everyday,” said Hunter simply and Willow hid her blush in the collection of red and yellow flowers Hunter had brought her.

“You mean if you were dating anyone, right?”

“Well not just anyone,” Hunter corrected him again. “Not everyone can handle the responsibility of plant care like Willow can.”

“But what if you were dating someone who wasn’t good with plants?” asked Gus.

Hunter looked at Gus like that was the most ridiculous question he had ever heard. “Why would I do that?”

Willow just giggled as she grabbed her books and held her flowers close to her chest to go add them to her garden in the greenhouse before class. As she walked away, she blew Hunter an over the top kiss as had become their tradition. He reached out his arm and pretended to reach for it as though it had nearly flown over his head before finally catching it and putting it in his breast pocket for safe keeping. Willow giggled as she turned the corner and Hunter wore a very convincing dopey grin as his eyes lingered on her until she completely left his sight.

“I know you’re trying to play it off as part of your ‘fake dating’ bit or whatever, but you always give Willow flowers before school and no one even sees you do it,” said Gus. 

“I mean I… I guess I just need to thank her for doing this,” he admitted. “I mean, it started out as lying to Boscha but I’ve been lying to her too! And I know it’s wrong but I’ve really liked spending time with her and it’s easier this way for some reason? And I’ve tried telling her, I really have, but everytime I try she adds something to the story and I just… I think I’m in too deep.”

“Hmm, it’s almost like she enjoys being your girlfriend,” said Gus as he closed his locker. “Go figure.”

---

Hunter sat on the end of the couch, his back against the armrest as his arm rested around Willow’s shoulder as she leaned against him with  her knees tucked to the side as she showed him a video on her scroll as they waited for Gus to started the movie .The scene was very cozy, very natural.

Very unnecessary. 

“You guys don’t have to do that, ya know.” said Gus, walking in and promptly sitting down on the ground in front of the couch, placing the popcorn on the coffee table. “I’m in on your little ruse, remember?”

“We know it’s just… an easier way to sit?” said Hunter as Willow let out a bright, airy giggle. “I mean, there’s not a lot of room so…”

“Uh-huh,” said Gus, looking next to them where two full cushions remained unoccupied. “Sure.”

“Plus, it’s like being undercover,” offered Hunter. “You need to be prepared, you never know who could be watching.”

“In my house?” Gus asked with a raise of his eyebrow.

“Yeah Gus we’re undercover,” said Willow, making herself even more comfortable at his side, resting her head on his shoulder as though that was where it was always meant to be. “Besides, we’re gonna break up soon.”

“Oh, really?” Gus asked skeptically, rolling his eyes as paused the opening of the movie, wondering when his third wheeling would become official. 

“Yes, really,” said Willow smugly, reaching behind her to grab the notebook off the end table. “We’ve been brainstorming.”

“Sure, that’s totally what you were doing,” he said, his sarcasm loud and clear. “So then, what do you have so far?”

“Okay, well…” Willow hesitated to start. “Here’s the thing…”

“It’s empty, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it’s empty,” said Willow, sitting back against Hunter’s arm. “We just… can’t think of a reason to break up.”

“Not a believable one, at least,” added Hunter. “We want it to be mutual so it won’t be suspicious when everyone thinks we’re just friends again. I mean well, not ‘again’ cause we always were, like the whole time, heh.”

 “Yeah,” she sighed, as though it was a real problem. “So we tried to think of something less personal. Like, not something about one of us but maybe because we’re too busy and don’t have time for a relationship.”

“But then we thought, that might not make sense since we do spend a lot of time together,” Hunter continued. “We still play flyer derby together and we’re in some classes together. Not to mention we have movie night with you every week…”

“I mean, it doesn’t have to be a big or flashy reason,” Gus offered, knowing they didn’t really try very hard. “You can just say you're better as friends. People shouldn’t question that.”

Except they definitely would, because Hunter would definitely still have a crush on Willow. He would still look at her with the same dopey grin, the same wide eyes, and the same rose colored flush in his cheeks. He knew he would because nothing about her had changed, she was still so wonderful and funny and smart and brave and beautiful. Titan, if anything this whole thing has made him like her more. And he didn’t mind still feeling this way, as confusing as it was, but he worried that his infatuation would make their story unconvincing. They would claim it was mutual and there were no lingering feelings, but now all eyes would be on them to see if it were true and there his feelings would be: lingering. 

And he worried people would somehow find a way to make Willow the bad guy. He knew Boscha was grasping at straws trying to ruin Willow’s reputation, and being a heartbreaker might be the straw she needed. He would deny she had broken his heart, but when it came down to it he didn’t think he could convincingly state he did not still have feelings for her. 

And that might be enough to make things weird. 

“I mean, we should at least stay together until Bleeding Hearts day,” said Willow. “We can figure out something after that.”

-

“Okay, I stand like this?” Hunter asked.

“Yeah, and then you prop your elbow against the locker like this,” instructed Willow, guiding him into position. “And like you can put your other hand on your hip or something and then I’ll stand against my locker…” Willow carefully put herself between Hunter and the locker so she was looking up at him. “And there! Just like the movie poster.”

“So this is flirting? Standing like this?”

“Well, standing and talking technically,” said Willow. “But if we stand like this, everyone can tell just by looking at us that that’s what we’re doing. Like a real couple.”

“Okay,” said Hunter, starting to understand. “Do we have to say anything in particular?” “I dunno, maybe you can try and say something funny?” Willow suggested coyly as she twirled the end of her braid around her finger. “Oh, and twirling my hair will also let them know we’re flirting too.”

“Okay okay,” said Hunter. “But should it be funny like clever funny? Or something more low brow? A pun? Or maybe one of those door jokes?”

“Hmm, we can always just pretend you said something funny and I’ll do a fake laugh,” said Willow.

“Wait, am I not funny?” he said with a fake scoff.

“I didn’t say that,” she said with a chuckle as she flicked his hair noodle.”You can be very funny.”

“That doesn’t sound like you think I’m funny,” he teased, absentmindedly leaning down closer to her. 

“You are funny,” she insisted, tapping him lightly on the shoulder. “When you’re not trying to be.”

“When am I not trying?” he said, his voice carrying a certain twinkle in it. 

“I dunno,” she said, wrinkling her nose at him. For some reason she felt bubbly, seeing Hunter pretend to act as though he was in disbelief. She felt like laughing now but tried to suppress it. Hunter noticed. 

“You’re laughing right now!” he declared victoriously. 

“I am not!” she denied, trying to hide her smile.

“Yes you are!” he said, adopting a chuckle of his own. “I know what your laugh sounds like, Captain!”

“Well, maybe I’m-.”

“You guys know Boscha’s been out of school all week with the common mold, right?” Gus asked, breaking the trance the pair had reentered with ease and had forgotten he was there.

Hunter offered him a quizzical look. “So?”

“Huh, no wonder things have been so peaceful around here,” Willow realized.

“Yeah, so without her around there’s no reason for you two to keep up this little act of yours,” Gus pointed out and Willow and Hunter realized they hadn't noticed Boscha’s absence because at some point they had stopped checking for her all together. 

“Hmm, I guess you’re right…” said Willow slowly, wishing he wasn’t. “But, I mean, the common mold usually lasts a week so she’ll be back soon.”

“Yeah,” Hunter agreed. “Plus, she might have spies reporting back to her while she’s out.”

“Spies?” Gus said, unconvinced with a rise of his eyebrow. “Really?”

“I mean, that does sound like Boscha,” said Willow. “Having…spies.” She knew it sounded silly. She knew what Boscha was capable of, but even that was a stretch. Hunter stopped leaning against the locker and stood up straight, trying to read Willow’s expression. 

“Congrats on being voted cutest couple!” Skara squeaked in delight as she bounced at them from seeming nowhere.

“What?” they exclaimed in unison.

“Awh!” Skara gushed. “You two are so in sync! So cute!”

“Skara, what do you mean-.”

“Just look!” she said happily, handing them a piece of paper. “It’s just a mock up, but that’s what it’s gonna be in the year book! I wanted to be the first to tell you, ya know in case you wanted to use a different picture or something.”

Willow looked down at the photo Skara had chosen. It was a photo of them after a flyer derby match, the photo captured Willow tackling him in a hug to celebrate their victory as Hunter caught her in his arms and spun her around, wearing a wide smile to match hers. They were looking at each other, totally unaware a photo was even being taken. He remembered that day, he could hear their laughter echoing as he spun her too quickly and they had fallen onto the ground right after the moment the photo was taken. He vividly remembered the smell of grass, the way the setting sun rested in her hair, and the way the sound of her laughter made his heart skip a beat. The picture was taken well before they had started “dating” and yet…

“It’s perfect Skara,” said Willow, her tone much different from what it was mere moments ago. He wondered why they stopped flirting if it was meant to convince people they were together. He had been enjoying himself and now he felt guilty. His cowardice had made this whole thing spiral out of control, and now their lie was to be preserved forever. In the back of his mind he remembered that Willow liked someone else. They were supposed to break up once everyone was convinced. How had they gotten so off task? How could he let Willow keep bailing him out in such a major way?

As Skara ran back to the classroom, an unsettling silence floated between the pair. Had it been any other story, any other bit, they would’ve come clean by now, right? 

They knew this. Gus had gone out of his way to remind them and they brushed it off. But now, it was hard to deny it was a harmless but. It was a pretty big commitment for someone you weren’t committed to. 

Willow had done all that for him and he couldn’t even be honest with her. He at least owed her that much. 

“Wow,” Willow chuckled nervously, trying to fill the silence. “That’s uh, that’s a pretty big honor.”

“Yeah,” Hunter agreed, searching his mind for how to word what he really needed to say. 

“I’m sure Amity will have something to say about it,” Willow chuckled lightly. “Since she and Luz have been together longer. But Luz doesn’t even technically go here, and I don’t think anyone would-.”

“I don’t wanna lie anymore.” 

She looked up to see Hunter’s face flushed, his fists balled at his sides as though it took all of his strength to bring out that sentence. Willow had to admit, it was not what she was expecting to hear. It was not what she was hoping to hear. 

“Oh.” was all she could manage to say. She didn’t need to ask what he meant. She could ask why, but she didn’t think she was up to it. “Um, okay.”

The bell screamed as Willow tried to process the whiplash that had just occurred. She could tell Hunter had more to say, but she felt as thought she had lost the ability to hear as static echoed in her mind. She was sure she said something about having to get to class, but she felt as though she was outside her body watching a blurry reenactment of a scene as her feet carried her away. They had joked about breaking up, because it was a joke. Because there was nothing really to break up. But then, why did it feel so real?

---

A few days went by and Willow and Hunter didn’t speak. He wasn’t waiting by her locker after class and miss practice after school. She assumed he needed space or assumed he assumed she needed it, but either way it was there. She knew the mature thing was to discuss the next steps, the story they would tell she had gotten so used to their new routine she had never prepared herself for its end. She thought he felt the same way.

“Well well well, if it isn’t Hexside’s most famous half-a-witch.” came a shrill voice Willow hadn’t heard in weeks interrupting her thoughts. She tried to ignore her, she knew that’s what was best. But of course, her timing was impeccable. 

“Where’s your loser boyfriend?” sneered Boscha, following her victim down the hall, having much lost time to make up for. “Oh let me guess, he finally dumped you right? He realized what a loser you really were and decided to cut his losses?”

Unbeknownst to Willow, Hunter was hiding nearby working up the courage to greet her by her locker to try and explain himself. He had tried writing another note, but this time would read from it instead of trying to get it to carry more than it should by itself. But he heard Boscha beat him to the location and any nervousness left his body and was promptly replaced by fury. He knew Willow could handle herself, but he knew his lie added fuel to the fire that were her words.

“It’s really none of your business, Boscha.”

“I’m right though, aren’t I? I knew there was no way someone like you could convince anyone to date them. What, did he lose a bet or something?”

Willow kept walking. Hunter wanted to scream. Boshca knew it wasn’t true and Willow was smarter than Bocha, surely she knew it too right? Surely she knew.

“Didn’t you learn your lesson last time, half-a-witch?” snickers Boscha. “The only way someone would ever date you would be as part of a joke. No doubt he got sick of having to see you everyday and realized-.”

Before he knew what he was doing, Hunter teleported beside Willow who looked surprised to see him. Before she could greet him or question him or say much of anything, he placed his hand on the side of her face and pulled her close to him as she had done that day after the party. 

But with one tiny major difference.

Willow quickly got over her surprise and leaned into the accidental kiss, dropping the books in her arm to the ground as she elected to rest her hands on Hunter’s chest, clinging to his shirt collar. He held her face in his hands like it was something delicate as their noses nestled beside each other like puzzle pieces meant to be like that. Willow did not need to rise to her tip toes to kiss him better as he leaned down to be closer to her and her foot popped in the air as his hold on her grew more secure. His lips were dry but surprisingly gentle as they found a comfortable placement against hers. Emotions of surprise and hesitation melted away as they had no place in a moment like this.

At some point during all of this, Bocha had left. Her grumbles and rude comments had gone unheard by the pair, far too engrossed in each other to consider there was anything else in the world worth caring about. 

Somehow Hunter managed to stop himself in the middle of what felt like a familiar yet impossible dream. He pulled back to see Willow’s eyes closed and her face flushed as reality caught up with him and prevented him from savoring the moment further. “Oh no, I didn’t do the thing.” 

“Really? I think you kinda did.” Willow giggled, looking at him with dreamy eyes, feeling like her chest was a fire bee hive as she allowed Hunter to be her balance, leaning forward happily to be caught any way he intended to catch her.

“No I mean the thing with my thumbs so I wouldn’t… so we wouldn’t…”

“But we did.” She said plainly, averting her gaze and playing with a loose thread on his uniform by his shoulder, she couldn’t bring herself to leave the bubble just yet. “Is that… okay?”

“I mean I… I don’t mind but I know that we’re technically broken up I think and that we were never even… I’m sorry,” he cast his eyes to the ground, and removed his hands from her face. “I-I just heard Boscha saying those awful things to you and I-I don’t know what came over me.”

“Don’t be sorry,” said Willow quickly, turning his face back to her to see his eyes. “For any of it. You just… got caught up in the moment. I’m sure I would’ve done the same thing.”

“Really?” Hunter squeaked and Willow nodded, her hand still resting on his check. “The uh… the exact same thing?”

Willow bit her lip as she moved her hand from his face to the back of his neck. Her other hand still had a steady hold of his collar and she planned to bring him back down to her to answer him without words but before she summoned the courage to do so, a loud gruff voice broke through their bubble as it flooded the hallway.

“Hey you two! Did you not hear the bell?” The voice demanded. They hadn’t, there were more important things holding their attention. So of course they didn’t know there was no one else left in the hallway. 

Except a very grumpy teacher who did not find lateness romantic. 

 “You’re late to class! Detention, both of you!”

---

“Willow, I… I owe you an apology.” Hunter said as they sat beside each other in detention, whispering as to not wake the teacher at the front of the classroom. 

“Hunter, it’s okay,” she whispered back. “It’s not the first time I’ve gotten detention.”

“No, not about that,” replied Hunter. “Well, yes about that too actually but I mean when I said I didn’t wanna lie anymore, I meant I didn’t want to lie to you anymore.”

“What? How were you-?”

He took a deep breath. “Okay, the truth is, I did run into Boscha that day,” he said quickly, trying to keep his voice steady. “But she didn’t ask me out… she caught me trying to ask you out.”

“What?”

“I was trying to put this in your locker,” he began, taking out the carefully folded note from his pocket and handing it to her. He had kept it, hoping there would be a right time for it. Hopefully this was it. “Because I didn’t know how else to do it and I thought it would be easier but she caught me and read it and threatened to tell everyone and I asked her not to because I didn’t want-

“People to know?”

“-you to think it wasn’t true,” he finished. “I-I thought if you heard that I liked you from Boscha, you’d never believe it since she’s always lying. And I didn’t wanna mess it up again so I panicked and that’s when I told her-.”

“Wait, ‘again?’” Willow repeated, confused. “What do you mean ‘again?’ When did you- oh! Do you mean your… wait.”

Her eyes told Hunter she knew exactly what he was referring to. He held his breath. “You did get it.”

“I did,” she said with a smile finding the answer to her question in his wide eyes. “I just… well, your autocorrect was always doing weird things and I didn’t want to assume… I mean not that I didn’t want to assume but I…”

She had hoped.

“But it doesn’t matter,” he sighed. “I shouldn’t have let this go on as king as it did, I’ve caused you so much trouble. You can keep the tickets, you can take Gus. I just… hope you’re not too mad and that maybe eventually we can-.”

“Hunter, when exactly did the thing with Boscha happen?” 

“Um about three weeks ago?”

“And you bought the flyer derby tickets for us to make it look like we were dating?”

“Well, I mean I knew you’d been wanting to go so I thought it would be a fun way to say thanks for being a great girlfriend.”

That was technically not a lie. He truly had been hoping he could say that by the time the event rolled around.

“But I guess what I’m asking is, when you bought the tickets you bought them with the intention of us going to the game as a date for Bleeding Hearts Day, right?”

“Yeah, I did.”

“Hunter… the date on these tickets says they were purchased months ago.” Willow said with a smile.

“Well, it’s your favorite team playing their biggest rival so tickets we’re gonna sell out pretty quick and I wanted to make sure we got good seats so once it was announced I-.”

“But… you couldn’t have known months in advance that we would pretend to be dating when the game was happening,” Willow pointed out, a deep blush covering her face. 

“You… you knew?”

“Kinda? I mean, I knew a little bit,” she admitted. “I didn’t actually know what I knew but I… uh, anyway.” She cleared her throat as she tried to steady her voice. “What I do know is, I’ve really liked getting to be your girlfriend.”

“Oh uh, good. I’m glad I… just wanted to make sure you were uh…”

“I also know that I don’t wanna lie anymore either,” she said softly, inching her chair closer to his.

“Oh, yeah of course I mean I understand if you just want to-.”

She placed her hand atop his on the table, effortlessly lacing their fingers together. “So let’s stop lying.”

He looked down at their hands in awe. A part of him wanted to make an excuse, to link it to their ruse. But a louder, kinder voice in his mind told him to squeeze her hand back. That so many words weren’t needed right now, to stop complicating it. Questions rolled around his brain trying to make him doubt this was what it was but he pushed them back, but then one slipped through the cracks.

“But what about… the other person you like?” He asked sheepishly. “Don’t you… I mean, aren’t they…?”

Willow looked at him with playful eyes as she bit her lip and Hunter felt like the smartest and stupidest person in the world.

And also the luckiest.

“Oh.” He said, understanding her look and not questioning it. His face was red and he knew it but didn’t care. He tried to summon the coolness he was convinced he had when they were only pretending. “Don’t you uh, wanna read the note first?”

“How about you summarize it for me?” She smiled.

“Okay uh…” he tried to pick his favorite metaphor when he realized he was doing it again. She didn’t mind that he was complicated and careful in fact she liked it. She liked him. And she was waiting for him. “Willow, would you wanna… go on a date… with me?”

“I’d love to Hunter,” she said softly, and he felt as though he heart was melting and exploding at the same time. “Lucky for you, I happen to have two great seats for a flyer derby game this weekend.”

“Wow, what’re the odds?” He chuckled, over the moon to find them back in their rhythm as he rested his head on his hand, admiring the scene finally presented in reality.

“Ya know, this means you’ll have to actually ask for my dads blessing for real then right?”

Hunter beamed, his face envied the suns brightness at her response. “I’ll go as soon as we’re out of here,” he assured, his heart racing at securing her blessing to ask for his blessing. 

“Great, so you can explain to them why I got detention today,” she said, with a wink. Hunter laughed before realizing Willow was in detention because she had gotten caught kissing him. Not exactly the first impression Hunter was hoping to present as a suitor.

Maybe he’d ask her dads after their first date, just in case.  

[maybeitsalive]

Philip Marlowe, BI: Novels quotes (part 2)

(Part 1)

The little sister

Chap 30

“He didn’t speak much, but when he did he had a nice voice, a soft-water voice. And he had a smile that warmed the whole room. “Wonderful casting,” I said, looking at him across the cards. We were playing double Canfield. Or he was. I was just there, watching him, watching his small and very neat and very clean hands go out across the table and touch a card and lift it delicately and put it somewhere else. When he did this he pursed his lips a little and whistled without tune, a low soft whistle, like a very young engine that is not yet sure of itself” (...) “He moved another card and flexed his fingers lightly. His nails were bright but short. You could see he was a man who loved to move his hands, to make little neat inconspicuous motions with them, motions without any special meaning, but smooth and flowing and light as swansdown. They gave him a feel of delicate things delicately done, but not weak. Mozart, all right.”

The Long Goodbye

ALL THE BOOK. He's in love with Terry Lennox and that's it, that's the book. In this case, it’s more about how he acts and the things he doesn’t say that are telling. No quote can give a clue about the insanity that is this novel. Here’s my best try:

Chap 1

(About Terry:)

“I drove home chewing my lip. I’m supposed to be tough but there was something about the guy that got me. I didn’t know what it was unless it was the white hair and the scarred face and the clear voice and the politeness. Maybe that was enough.”

Chap 3

(After learning that Terry got re-married in the papers, Marlowe has this casual normal reaction:)

I threw the paper into the corner and turned on the TV set. After the society page dog vomit even the wrestlers looked good. But the facts were probably right. On the society page they better be. I had a mental picture of the kind of eighteen-room shack that would go with a few of the Potter millions, not to mention decorations by Duhaux in the last subphallic symbolism. But I had no mental picture at all of Terry Lennox loafing around one of the swimming pools in Bermuda shorts and phoning the butler by R/T to ice the champagne and get the grouse atoasting. There was no reason why I should have."

(Marlowe & Terry:)

“What I don’t get is why a guy with your privileges would want to drink with a private eye.” “Are you being modest?” “Nope. I’m just puzzled. I’m a reasonably friendly type but we don’t live in the same world. I don’t even know where you hang out except that it’s Encino. I should guess your home life is adequate.” “I don’t have any home life.”

Chap 8

“If you had had a grain of sense you’d have told the police you hadn’t seen Lennox for a week. It didn’t have to be true. Under oath you could always have told the real story. There’s no law against lying to the cops. They expect it. They feel much happier when you lie to them than when you refuse to talk to them. That’s a direct challenge to their authority. What do you expect to gain by it?” I didn’t answer. I didn’t really have an answer.”

Chap 10

(Marlowe & Morgan, a journalist:)

“Thanks for the ride, Morgan. Care for a drink?” “I’ll take a rain check. I figure you’d rather be alone.” “I’ve got lots of time to be alone. Too damn much.” “You’ve got a friend to say goodbye to,” he said. “He must have been that if you let them toss you into the can on his account.” “Who said I did that?” He smiled faintly. “Just because I can’t print it don’t mean I didn’t know it, chum. So long. See you around.”

Chap 11

(about Terry:)

“I owned a piece of him. I had invested time and money in him, and three days in the icehouse, not to mention a slug on the jaw and a punch in the neck that I felt every time I swallowed. Now he was dead and I couldn’t even give him back his five hundred bucks. That made me sore. It is always the little things that make you sore.”

(Menendez:)

“Don’t kid me, Marlowe. You didn’t spend three days in the freezer just because you’re a sweetheart.”

(oh yes he did)

(About Menendez – wait for it:)

“How about half a dozen of these?” I asked him and hit him as hard as I could in the middle of his belly. He doubled up mewling. The cigarette case fell to the floor. He backed against the wall and his hands jerked back and forth convulsively. His breath fought to get into his lungs. He was sweating. Very slowly and with an intense effort he straightened up and we were eye to eye again. I reached out and ran a finger along the bone of his jaw. He held still for it.”

Chap 12

(Terry’s letter:)

“So forget it and me. But first drink a gimlet for me at Victor’s. And the next time you make coffee, pour me a cup and put some bourbon in it and light me a cigarette and put it beside the cup. And after that forget the whole thing. Terry Lennox over and out. And so goodbye.” “I did what he asked me to, sentimental or not. I poured two cups and added some bourbon to his and set it down on the side of the table where he had sat the morning I took him to the plane. I lit a cigarette for him and set it in an ash tray beside the cup. I watched the steam rise from the coffee and the thin thread of smoke rise from the cigarette.”

Chap 21

“I sat there for a while taking life seriously. Then I tried to think of something funny so that I could have a great big laugh. Neither way worked, so I got Terry Lennox’s letter of farewell out of the safe and reread it. It reminded me that I had never gone to Victor’s for that gimlet he asked me to drink for him. It was just about the right time of day for the bar to be quiet, the way he would have liked it himself, if he had been around to go with me. I thought of him with a vague sadness and with a puckering bitterness too.”

Chap 22

“I said: “I’m a fellow who knew Terry Lennox, liked him, and had an occasional drink with him. It was kind of a side deal, an accidental friendship. I never went to his home or knew his wife. I saw her once in a parking lot.” “There was a little more to it than that, wasn’t there?” She reached for her glass. She had an emerald ring set in a nest of diamonds. Beside it a thin platinum band said she was married. I put her in the second half of the thirties, early in the second half. “Maybe,” I said. “The guy bothered me. He still does.”

Chap 35

“The other part of me wanted to get out and stay out, but this was the part I never listened to. Because if I ever had I would have stayed in the town where I was born and worked in the hardware store and married the boss’s daughter and had five kids and read them the funny paper on Sunday morning and smacked their heads when they got out of line and squabbled with the wife about how much spending money they were to get and what programs they could have on the radio or TV set. I might even have got rich — small-town rich, an eight-room house, two cars in the garage, chicken every Sunday and the Reader’s Digest on the living room table, the wife with a cast iron permanent and me with a brain like a sack of Portland cement. You take it, friend. I’ll take the big sordid dirty crooked city.”

("a heterosexual way of life will ruin you" is a recurrent theme)

Chap 39

“You were pretty helpful to a guy named Lennox too, the way I hear it. And you didn’t make a dime out of that one either. What do you do for eating money, pal? You got a lot saved so you don’t have to work any more?” I stood up and walked around the desk and faced him. “I’m a romantic, Bernie. I hear voices crying in the night and I go see what’s the matter. You don’t make a dime that way. You got sense, you shut your windows and turn up more sound on the TV set. Or you shove down on the gas and get far away from there. Stay out of other people’s troubles. All it can get you is the smear. The last time I saw Terry Lennox we had a cup of coffee together that I made myself in my house, and we smoked a cigarette. So when I heard he was dead I went out to the kitchen and made some coffee and poured a cup for him and lit a cigarette for him and when the coffee was cold and the cigarette was burned down I said goodnight to him. You don’t make a dime that way. You wouldn’t do it. That’s why you’re a good cop and I’m a private eye.”

Chap 53

All of it. All of it.

Playback

who? I don't know her.

[lokissweater]

“i would never lie to you.”

{toge inumaki x f!reader}

summary: inumaki’s always coming home to you from missions coughing up mass amounts of blood and completely overdoing it while fighting curses with his cursed speech technique. and no matter how many times you tell him to be careful, he just doesn’t, arguing with him, giving him the cold shoulder, and completely unaware of the reason behind why he fights so hard when he’s out there— that reason being of course… because of you.

warnings: angst, fluff, cursing, toge and reader have a lil argument but it’s more the aftermath, slight sexual mention but it’s literally once and nothing LOL, no smut!, toge thinks he’s not doing enough SNIFFF, angst with comfort, toge is DEVOTED to you, aged up characters, pet names, afab!reader.

word count: 2.3k

authors note: short n sweet one!! wanted to give you guys a break from my MLA format essays i always make y’all read LMFAOOO!! this one is SHO SOFT AHHHH :] i hope this keeps you guys fed in the meantime while i write the next one! i love you and i love you all ALWAYS MWAAHH <33

————————————————————————

toge inumaki hates it when you don’t talk to him.

as if he doesn’t do that enough already, toge absolutely despises when you both get into arguments or heated discussions and you turn a cold shoulder to him— needing space to unwind and prevent yourself from lashing out even more, to let the situation simmer down.

he understands it. believe him he does— you’re upset and angry and you need time to cool off… but toge is stubborn and needy and just doesn’t care, needing you and only you, him going absolutely crazy at the silence in your shared apartment that he was starting to hear random ringing in his ear drums.

so as he sat on the couch, eyes unblinking as they stared off into the darkness of the living room as the sun had already began to set, you upstairs locked away— he wanted nothing more than to open his mouth and let his cursed speech force you to come downstairs and talk to him.

but he didn’t, though the thought was definitely tempting, as toge vowed the day that he laid eyes on you to never ever use his cursed technique on you, even if it was harmless, an oath he wanted to carry with him until his very death bed and until he was six feet under.

his ears perked up then at the quiet sounds of the upstairs room door knob twisting and clicking open, soft padded footsteps making their way down the hall and closer to where he was, feet sticking against the cold tiles of the kitchen floor.

at the sight of you with your hair a little disheveled, your eyes so red and puffy, and an arm wrapped around yourself as you rummaged through the fridge looking for fuck knows what and not sparing a single glance at him— toge felt like a fifty pound gutting weight was resting on his chest and crushing his heart.

you had both argued about something you always seemed to circle back to almost every week. but this time, you were sick and tired and fed up, seeing as toge was never going to try and understand the situation at hand through your worried eyes.

every time toge was out for a mission, you would spend your days anxiously throwing yourself over the couch or trying to keep yourself busy with random activities like baking or scrapbooking (which you deemed later meaningless), all within the sole purpose of trying to get your mind off of your boyfriend and the recklessness he always seemed to pull while on missions, regardless of how much you begged and pleaded with him to be more careful and aware of his health.

toge inumaki had such a powerful and lethal cursed technique that frightened and astonished you all at the same time, a conflicting feeling to have when he had to leave you in the middle of the night or during the early hours of the morning to run around and fight curses… but always coming home to you warm and loving and safe.

but not right now.

not when toge had literally come home this morning with not even two steps in the door and he was already on his knees, coughing up strings and loads of crimson blood, it pooling on the floor as he had used his cursed speech to the highest degree today and had you a crying mess thinking he was dying.

and he always did that. always. today was just the worst of them all, him without a fault coming home with excruciating pain in his bruised and clawed up throat, the cough syrup medicine he usually downed like water having absolutely no effect anymore as you scrambled around every time trying to find a solution, toge brushing off your distressed and frightened rambling as if his health wasn’t a big deal, and as if how much it affected you wasn’t a big deal either.

upon you closing the fridge, toge slowly stood from the couch and carefully walked over to you, his throat still in pieces but his mind lurching and guilty over how upset you were at him.

he slowly raised a gentle hand and placed it on your shoulder, you shaking your head somberly in response— your back to him.

“i don’t wanna talk right now toge i’m sorry…” you mumbled, rubbing over your tired sore eyes.

he squeezed your shoulder, insisting.

but you only shook your head again.

toge huffed and placed both hands on your shoulders this time, physically turning you around to face him— his eyes soft and his eyebrows pinched together in pure concern for you.

you peeked up reluctantly, but the sight of his face and the events from earlier flashing through your mind only made your bottom lip wobble and the bottom of your palms shoot up to dig into your eyes, more stinging tears flooding in and slipping through the corners of your closed lids.

his heart fucking broke.

“why don’t you care toge?” you hiccuped. “i worry myself sick every time you leave for a mission and— and that’s fine because it’s what you do but you never take care of yourself!”

he gently pried your shaking hands away from your eyes and wiped your tears softly with his thumbs, caressing your cheeks after— wishing so badly, more than anything in this fucking world, to just be able to speak to you like a normal human being instead of resorting to words scrambled on a piece of paper or text messages on a screen.

he gently placed a little timid peck to your nose before releasing your face and fumbling around in his pockets for his phone, tapping it awake once he retrieved it and opening his notes app to write out a sentence.

he flipped and faced the screen towards you, the brightness making you squint a bit.

“i do care i swear. i just always forget when i’m in the middle of it and i’m sorry baby.”

“so you keep forgetting after what feels like the fifteenth time i’ve told you?” you wiped more tears from your cheeks. “how— how do you think it makes me feel when you come home and you’re coughing up blood all over your clothes and the furniture huh? all over me?”

he sighed softly through his nose and went to type again, but you continued.

“i get scared toge that one day you’ll push yourself way too far and then you just won’t come home. you scare me when you cough up so much blood like that!—”

toge tugged you in then with his unoccupied hand and wrapped his arms around you, pushing your head in and stuffing your face against his chest— the scent of his freshly washed t-shirt filling your nose as you cried softly.

fuck he felt like such a douche.

he typed for a moment behind your head, a pit in his stomach that only grew in size the longer he heard your little sniffles.

toge pulled back a bit, his arms still keeping you in place but just enough so that he could lower his phone and show you his message.

“please please don’t cry. i’m really sorry okay i really am and honest to god this won’t happen again.”

you nodded meekly and he flipped his phone back, quickly typing again and showing you once he finished.

“i feel like you think i don’t care but that’s not true at all. part of the reason why i try so hard when i work is because the more curses i fuck up the safer you’ll be when you’re out there without me.”

you laughed a bit at his wording, and he beamed at that, typing.

“i love you pretty girl. and im sorry i always get blood everywhere.”

“oh i don’t care about the mess baby, i care about youu,” you whined lightly and wrapped your arms around his torso, pulling him in tight.

“and i love you too, a lot… like an embarrassing amount that strips away my dignity.”

he chuckled boyishly and pressed a tender kiss to the top of your head, his body stuttering slightly as a single thought grazed his mind— the same thought that’s been in the crevices of his brain since he asked you to be his.

you felt his tension and pulled back.

“what?”

toge bit the inside of his cheek and looked down at you, his weight shifting as he contemplated telling you something he didn’t want to burden or upset you with, the pad of his thumb softly rubbing over your chubby cheek.

you quirked an eyebrow. “what? are you cheating on me?”

he burst out laughing and shook his head, kissing your forehead before dropping his hand from your cheek and pulling out his phone again.

he typed for a minute then showed you.

“me not being able to speak to you like a normal boyfriend should or respond to you whenever makes me freaking useless. so i push myself out there to keep you safe because that’s literally the least i can do for you, since i can’t even do the bare minimum.”

you gasped softly. “toge huh? this is—”

he shook his head once more and you stopped as he typed again.

“i always try to make you laugh with the things that i do or whenever i text you because i’m afraid that one day you’ll get tired of me not being able to talk to you and you’ll leave. which is also something i would never blame you for and understand.”

your heart squeezed in the worst excruciatingly way possible, completely baffled and mortified to the fact that toge was thinking about things like this and wholeheartedly believing it without you noticing or him saying anything to you about it.

he typed again.

“that’s why i cosplay as gojo when i leave for missions and come back a dumbass with blood in my mouth. that’s why i forget when you tell me to be careful because the need to be something for you is way fucking greater.”

“togeee!” you sobbed, bursting out crying like a little baby as you were moved and haunted by his words simultaneously, your arms engulfing him as he desperately shot his hands out and quickly wiped your tears again, shaking his head frantically as if pleading with you not to cry.

“how could you ever believe that?” you nudged him away and hiccuped, your eyes serious. “why haven’t you told me about this? everything you just said is literally propaganda.”

he chuckled, but you could tell he wasn’t convinced.

“toge, why do you think i’ve been with you for so long? do you think i’m just dicking around?”

“dicking around on my dick?”

you swatted his phone away. “no! not right now.”

you both shared a small giggle, twinkling eyes looking at each other.

“if i felt like you weren’t doing even the bare minimum, i would’ve been gone before you had the chance to put this ring on—”

his gaze drifted down to the black shiny heart promise ring on your ring finger that you held up for him, and he smiled softly.

“baby what you do for me everyday is above and beyond the bare minimum. i’m happy. i’m so happy to be with you that you not doing enough has never crossed my mind and it never will.”

you slid your arms around his neck and pulled him down a little, gently. “i’ve never cared about your ability to speak. i fell in love with you, who you are, and the fact that i did without you having to iterate words to me? olympic sport.”

toge rolled his eyes playfully at your comment, and you stood on your tippy toes and kissed the tip of his pretty nose then. “all men do when they talk is lie anyways…” you tilted your head. “but i know you’ll never lie to me.”

“never.” he mouthed silently.

he bundled you up in his arms and lifted you like you were nothing, him carefully leaning in and pressing his lips to yours as if you were a fragile little thing— kissing you so devotedly, warmly, his forehead resting against yours once he pulled apart after greedily getting his daily fix of you.

“i know your job as a jujutsu sorcerer pays the bills and comes with you putting yourself in difficult situations… and my job doesn’t even compare, but please don’t overdo it for my sake. i want you to come home, okay?”

you know it’s selfish… he should be saving lives no matter the cost.

but he was your man. was it so bad to just want to keep him for the rest of your days? to get the chance to grow old with him, and buy a little quiet house on the country side like you always joked about in the late hours of the night with him? drinking cool glasses of lemonade on the porch?

“please don’t always be the hero.” you whispered guiltily. “but if you must… just keep me in mind while you do it.”

you’re always on his mind. he hopes you know that.

toge breathed softly through his nose and smoothly set you back down, the pads of your feet making contact with the icy tile flooring as his hands dragged up from around your waist to the sides of your head, him pushing a hard kiss to your cheek as if to seal your request.

“do you promise?” you mumbled.

he pulled back and held his little pinky out for you, and you giggled, linking yours with his firmly.

“you can’t go back on it okay? you used your pinky it’s legally binding!” you warned, a silly smile on your face. “don’t lie to me and break it.”

toge grinned and leaned towards you as he bent down a bit— your gaze locking with his as he looked at you at eye level with his hands on his knees, him mouthing his next words, slowly.

words that made your cheeks buzz a cutesy pink, words that he took seriously, and words that tied you to him and the little house by the countryside he wanted so badly with you, as those words solidified how much he truly truly loved you— him hoping you always knew.

“i would never lie to you.” he mouthed.

taglist!! <33: @saebaey

[my-supernatural-rewatch]

Episode 9: Home

Dean Winchester in the Supernatural episode Home

Oh yay. The episode that began my lifelong hatred of John Winchester.

When Sam has visions of a woman in trouble at the old Winchester house in Lawrence, Kansas, he makes Dean go back home in an attempt to both help the new homeowner and possibly discover what really happened to their mother.

This episode annoys me so much I almost don't even want to write about it...but I will.

So it's been 22 years since the fire and John presumably selling the house. (By the way, where did the money from the sale of the house go because it didn't go to housing or feeding the boys, but I digress.)

It's been sold more than once (if they mention how many times in this episode I missed it) because this new family just moved in and shit is happening that Sam dreams about. Now you're caught up.

We know it's the old Winchester house because the new owner finds a wooden box with stuff in it including what looks like could be a handmade card that says DAD across it (which would have had to be from Dean) and some pictures. Another question, why did John leave this box behind? Especially when it gets established in this episode that Dean has family pics. Why save some and not all, John? Huh?

Sam has a dream something bad is going to happen and demands they go back to Lawrence. As anyone not self-involved would be able to guess, Dean is not so keen on this idea given the last time he was in the house he saw his mother burning.

"I swore to myself that I'd never go back there."

Now I know Dean swore this when he got older but I did get a kick out of the idea of a four-year-old making himself a solemn oath to never go back to that house. Actually,that would be very Dean-like.

In spite of that, Dean knows that they have to go check it out. Dean tries to lie to the new homeowner that they're FBI but Sam interrupts with the truth...kind of. He gives their real names and says they just wanted to see the old house.

This happens a lot in fiction and I have to tell you if strangers came to my house and said "we used to live here can we look around" I'd say 'fuck no" for various reasons, among them, I'd need time to clean the damn house but more pressing would be WHY WOULD I LET STRANGERS IN MY HOUSE?

They find out about the weird stuff happening at the house and when Sam tries to get Dean to open up about how he feels about being home Dean drops a truth bomb Sam didn't expect:

"I'm just freaked out that your weirdo visions have come true."

Thus begins the storyline of psychic Sam and how somehow this freaks Dean the fuck out. I guess because Dean doesn't want to look at Sam like he's a 'monster' but I still always thought they went a little overboard with how much Sam being psychic weirded Dean out.

Also, I'm team Psychic Sam all the way. They should have never taken his powers away from him.

We have another episode where Dean's instincts about what the monster of the week is - is. I get that Sam is out of practice but we end up hearing about what a great hunter Sam is and, really, from the get-go Dean had it all over him.

We do get some good tidbits in this episode about the night of the fire. 22 years later and Sam JUST learns that Dean was the one who got him out of the house that night. How does that not get mentioned in all that time?

Oh here's how: John never told Dean or Sam what he thought killed Mary. So 22 years of running around the country chasing monsters and almost getting killed and John never actually discussed specifics with the boys. Nice. Nice.

After sharing with Sam about getting him out of the house, Dean ducks out under the guise of having to use the bathroom and makes a desperate call to John's cell phone and we learn that Dean has been leaving messages for John ever since they discovered the phone was turned back on...and, of fucking course, John hasn't responded to any of them.

"...I’m with Sam. And we’re in Lawrence. And there’s something in our old house. I don’t know if it’s the thing that killed Mom or not, but….(at this point his voice starts to shake and he's trying to keep it all together)…I don’t know what to do. (THEN HE STARTS TO CRY) So, whatever you’re doing, if you could get here. Please. I need your help, Dad."

So of course the next scene is John calling Dean back right?

RIGHT?

Of fucking course not. I hate that (fictional) man so much.

We find out that John was co-owner of a garage until the fire made him nuts. Dean and Sam talk to his former partner who tells them that John "sure loved Mary and doted on those kids." Also, the partner begged John to get help so someone saw John going down a bad path and tried to do something.

This dude gives them a lead: John hood up with a "palm reader in town" and the boys track down Missouri (again, thanks to Dean remembering something John wrote in his journal about Missouri).

A side note about Missouri. I know everyone loves her but she was at the very least counseling John and knew about Dean and Sam and STILL John ended up being John. As a psychic, she could have done more, IMO, to protect those boys.

"I went to Missouri and I learned the truth." Is what John wrote in his journal. So he knew all along and never.told.the.fucking.boys.

You'll note I usually write Dean and Sam. That's because normal people usually say the older sibling's name first. On Supernatural Sam gets first billing, I'm guessing, because Jared got first billing. It's stupid. I always thought it was stupid and I will always hate it.

I only bring it up because when they go see Missouri they don't even have an opportunity to lie about how they are, she clocks them as "Sam and Dean" immediately. She only knew Sam as an infant. It makes so much more sense that she would have said "Dean and Sam" is all I'm saying.

As an aside, in my notes I made a point of writing down that this episode is rife with dramatic close-ups of Dean. This is supposed to be Sam's story, really, but the director reminds us at all times that it's also Dean's.

We get an obligatory dumb thing to happen to move the plot along when the mom in the Winchester house leaves her baby alone in the kitchen after all kinds of sketchy stuff has been going on...only to give us a truly frightening moment when the kid crawls into the open fridge and gets locked in. Christ, that was scarier than most of this show's monsters.

Dean makes it his job to make sure "no one else dies" in the house/ Because it's always on him.

I think this is the first episode where we see hex bags (although they don't call them that). Missouri and Dean are making them and are going to shove them into the walls of the house. Okay, let's go.

I don't know if it was my tv, my eyes, the time of day I watched the episode or the actual episode itself, but man this one seemed to be shot much more darkly than other episodes.

The poltergeist basically kicks Misssouri's and Sam's asses while Dean fends it off...and comes to Sam's rescue...of course.

They trash the house in their efforts to get rid of the poltergeist...and Dean seemingly does just that according to Missouri.

When the owner comes back to the house, Missouri tells her Dean will clean up. She's been giving Dean shit the entire episode with no explanation. It makes no sense. Dean is the one who was old enough that she would have remembered, connected with. Why is she so shitty to him.?

They all leave with literally no proof that they've done anything but destroy the house and the new owner is all "Thanks!"

Just like the film Poltergeist, even though they thought the thing was gone...it wasn't. And Sam senses it so luckily they are right outside the house when Sam's vision starts to come true and they rush in to save the day.

The poltergeist is still in the house...but so is another ghost...Mary Winchester.

And she's a bit of a drama queen...appearing to them in flames. And she only says three things, their names "Dean." "Sam." and then she says "I'm sorry" to Sam. That's it. Then she turns around, yells at the poltergeist and he leaves.

Who knew it was that simple?

We get a shot of Dean holding a picture of him holding Sam and it is just too squee for words.

So according to Missouri, Mary "destroyed herself" when she yelled at the poltergeist so the house is clean of ghosts and hopefully (I guess) that means Mary got destroyed to Heaven.

The last thing Missouri says to them is "Don't you boys be strangers." Dean's response? "We won't."

Twelve years later Dean and Sam see her again.

We get a huge reveal at the end of the episode which isn't that huge a reveal since Jeffrey Dean Morgan's damn name was in the opening credits but when Missouri goes home, guess who's there? Fucking John.

Missouri can't figure out why with his psychic powers Sam couldn't sense John was there. She tells him Mary DID save the boys and she's upset he won't tell them he's there. He tells her he can't until he 'knows the truth.'

Oh shut the fuck up, John. You suck so goddamn hard.

Some notes for posterity:

THERE IS NO MUSIC IN THIS EPISODE. None. WTH?

Dean tries to tell the new homeowner they're FBI but Sam tells the truth. They pose as cops investigating the house fire/John's disappearance when interviewing his ex-business partner.

Movie References: Dean brings up both The Shining and a reference to Poltergeist in this one.

This hunt takes place in Lawrence, Kansas.

Dean wears John’s jacket in this episode but only at the end.

Not including the pilot and John's outgoing voicemail message, this is the first time both John and Mary are in an episode taking place in the current day.

Recognizable Guest Stars: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Samantha Smith, Loretta DeVine

[f0xgl0v3]

Legacies in Camp Jupiter/Just Pjo?

Wow I am on a roll! Anyway I’ve been wanting to do this and the power post just really dragged up this issue in my head back to the forefront, and it is someone that really continuously confuses me on a basic level of how Rick chose to let this category function.

Legacies are a type of Demigod introduced in HoO that are directly related to Gods but aren’t first generation. They are not children of gods but like grandkids, great-grandkids, so on and so on. This is not a new concept, it is as old as myths themselves, the first thing that pops up in my mind was Troy’s royal family was said in myths to be descended from Zeus. That makes someone like Hector (in Pjo-verse vocabulary) a legacy in the Pjo canon.

But.. Legacies aren’t really different to demigods? Like- not different enough that they would get classified as differently-? For several reasons I believe, but the main three points I want to make (because apparently all my thoughts come in packs of 3), is that 1) Legacies and Demigods are shown to have the same godly-ability level as one another/ it’s inconsistent, 2) somewhat through the books themselves they just sort of stop using the word Legacy/Legacies never have anything that set them apart from demigods, 3) this is a new concept to distinguish them (this is the weakest but it feels weird that Rick decided to differentiate Legacies and Demigods when myths never really did too much, but when did Rick care about the source material- okay, that was rude I’m just still annoyed over Ares-)

Anyway,

Legacies and Demigods powers. Legacies are shown to have similar power levels to Demigods, or those powers are inconsistent. I bring this up because it feels odd? That legacies would have a similar broad level of abilities while still being more mortal than god (this depends and I’ll talk about what I think for like hc on New Rome and their legacy population) but we have characters like Bryce Lawerence; who has powers like, shadow travel (the shadow travel is implied but I’ll get into why it’s likely he has some form of enhanced ability to travel), enhanced tracking (also implied but this will fit into the travel thing), summoning the damned souls of those who broke oaths, along with being implied to have visited the underworld at some point because he mentions hearing the screams of the fields of punishment. But let’s also remember that BoO takes place somewhere in 8-9 days (starts July 20, ends Aug 3) the Bryce attack scene is on chapter XXX while Bryce being brought back to the legion is in chapter VI. No less than if I remember correctly like 2-3 days could’ve past. There are a couple things, he’s stealthy enough that Nico doesn’t notice him. We don’t get any confirmation that he’d been following them for a while (from all I know of Bryce’s character I have to assume he wasn’t or he would’ve 100 percent taken the first chance to attack them) but he is able to get from Long Island to South Carolina on foot, and seemingly appear out of nowhere. There is probably a logical explanation but also considering the fact he knows what’s happening to Nico (that shadow traveling fading that doesn’t seem to matter?) makes me consider and lean more to the idea that he can shadow travel (honestly would love to make another post on Bryce Lawerence because no one cares about him but I really find him interesting). But if he can do the (implied shadow travel) and the very apparent necromancy he has the same skill set of Nico! Never mind the tiny little difference in the necromancy, they have the same power and the same level of that power. The difference is that one is a legacy, and one is a Demigod- but there doesn’t seem to be a power difference. Secondly Frank’s shapeshifting thing, I’ll be real and say I just think that’s a thing because like Poseidon gifted it? I think of it as the same way that like the Red panda gift from turning Red is going strong because it was a blessing or whatever. And Octavian, who is (said, for some reason Rick wanted to put in that maybe Octavian never had powers at all but that’s stupid and takes away what little things Octavian has) but he also, doesn’t seem to have a dip in powers? I don’t care much for seeing the Apollo kids but it seems that they all can have varied powers (fitting seeing as Apollo was a god of so many things) and Octavian’s skill doesn’t seem limited in any way (would’ve been great if we got more information on it because we have no idea how it works compared to say, the way we know how the Oracle stuff works) but all of this puts a clear image that from the legacies we know, there doesn’t seem to be a big difference in power. Which is odd, seeing as they don’t feel like they should.

Through HoO Rick really just like- stopped talking about legacies? I’m laughing as I’m writing this but know it’s a saddened laugh because like. Rachel refers to Octavian as Son of Apollo (Which could be argued she doesn’t know what a Legacy is but I feel like since her Oracle powers told her everything else it would’ve informed her of his proper title- or I guess not because the writing didn’t care at all about Octavian-) and I think Reyna mentions Bryce is a legacy though it’s not referenced any more. Bryce just brings up Orcus in some dialogue and that’s about it. If you’re going to bring up a new type of Demigod then why not explore them more? HoO doesn’t explore like anything but still, Frank never has thoughts about his Legacy stuff. We don’t even get any notes about Greek demigods not considering most of the Roman Legacies Demigods because they aren’t the direct Children of the Gods? It just like- Legacies kind of do nothing, there is nothing different about a legacy.

Mythology doesn’t even really distinguish the two? Like- again because I’ve read the Iliad and Odyssey it’s what I always think first. Hector mentions he is also related to Zeus- that there is a distinct thing about demigods like Sarpedon, Achilles, and Aeneas. But there never is something where it calls out, “Oh Hectors great-great-great grandpa is Zeus and that’s super different and crazy” but it’s just “Hectors related to Zeus y’know and he’s gonna kick your butt man >:[“ obviously this is a random point because those are ancient texts. But we have to remember that Pjo is founded off of these myths and the fact that Legacies are a part of these myths but distinctly different (literally everyone who is descended from Zeus which is literally everyone- not literally but like-) operate differently, they are essentially no different than their fully mortal companions other than they can sport a God ancestor and the most convoluted family tree.

Okay. Those are the points that I’ve made. All of those boil down into like “Rick did nothing to differentiate Legacies from Demigods other than slap a different name on them” and that’s a missed opportunity. It’d be like if something like Harry Potter went, “Here are wizards that are said to be different than other magic users but all that’s different are their titles!” That might be a thing I don’t know I don’t consume Harry Potter. But there was a ball and it was slammed into the ground (huh, almost like Rick did that with a lot of things related to Camp Jupiter and the Romans- also the Romans canonically have cars and I don’t like that). But I have some Head-canons about legacies for my re-imagining to hopefully make them, make more sense?

The longer a legacy line is, the more ‘diluted’ the power becomes. Like in the myths, after you hit a certain point most legacies will have incredibly weak powers. This adds to the powers post I made (shameless plug that you should read that one too because I’m proud of it.) and how the legacies affect the Romans view on powers. But this means that the farther you get down a family line the less and less powerful the power is. Say a child of Zeus has children and then like ten generations down the line the descendants could be more resistant to lightning, conduct it easier and attract it a little more, maybe jump a big higher but that’s about it. Example, Michael Kahale In my re-imagining comes from a super duper long line and his powers pretty much are, I look pretty, I’m a little more persuasive from remnants of charm-speak (and I want to buff up the Aphrodite cabin more because Rick really just didn’t care when it came to them)

This doesn’t include ‘gifts’ like Frank’s. I think by the will of the God that blessed the ancestor with it they keep the power strong. This goes the same way for curses, maybe. If the curse is not revered than it probably is passed onto your kid.

In common sense, the fresher the legacy the more potent the power. And sometimes there can be mutations that a child can end up with more potent powers, whether that be the wishes of the Godly ancestor or they just get miracle genes it could act as a soft re-boot to strengthen the powers. For examples; Bryce is a very new legacy, his dad is the direct child of Orcus and Bryce gets passed down all of the cool powers (also need a hc for his mother because she comes from a legacy line) or Octavian was just.. born with the more potent powers, I like to think Apollo noted him and took interest to strengthen his powers for some reason. (Note he also is a legacy of Venus but I haven’t worked out if that affects him and how, but the Venus part is much more downplayed)

Legacies who have mixed godly blood/ several different lines that have merged have a little from everything, their powers are weaker but if like for example a Child of Athena with a Hermes legacy might have a easier time stealing things, or be a little faster than their peers. But these end up very minimal because the direct child aspect overpowers it a lot (idk I don’t know hypothetical demigod genes and how they work so let’s just go with it) this is similar with legacies+legacies though the family will usually stick to one legacy title (sort of how last names are passed on, but a partner wouldn’t take up the legacy title of the family. But a child would) while the powers honestly could be all over the place

Okay that’s all I think right now, if I have anything else I’ll probably make a separate post but for me right now it is very nighttime and I need my sleep so I can crush my siblings in various unserious competition.

[priincebutt]

Holy shit those are such good prompts and I wanna send you an ask for every single one! But I'm gonna go with the one that jumped out at me first!

"People say I'm jealous but my kink is watching you ruin your life."

And please don't hate me but... Alex/Hunter (platonic/ hate-ship)

it's hot when you have a meltdown an ACD x WASP-y Hunter ficlet

Hunter is so boring. And he's such an asshole, with his constant need to correct people and his over-abundance of intelligence he insists on flaunting. He's not someone you take home to your mom, but he's a good fuck, so who is Alex to say no?

It started a month ago. They were both at the same bar late, and one shot had led to another, which led to an angry make out session that was more teeth and tongue, and next thing Alex knew, WASPy Hunter was in his bed, undone and writhing and conquered. And then it happened again, and Alex wasn’t… mad at it, honestly. He should have been, but there was something satisfying about fucking Hunter’s brains out, hearing him moaning Alex’s name like it was a sacred oath when during the daylight hours he used his name as a curse.

So now things between them are… weird, but manageable. During classes they still race against each other, pushing for the better score or the more correct answer, seeing whose hand can fly into the air the fastest to answer the professor’s question, needling at each other and generally pushing one another higher and higher. At night they take their aggression out in the only way they seem to know how – between the sheets. It’s better than physically fighting, Alex guesses, but it’s still so weird to know that he can absolutely loathe Hunter, and everything that comes out of his mouth, one moment, and be balls deep in him the next and it’s… fine. Normal, now, even.

But just because they’ve seen each other naked doesn’t mean Alex still doesn’t get absolute glee when he sees that he’s scored higher on their finals than Hunter has. If anything, it fuels him, and Nora gives him a look that screams ‘you’re being a fucking weirdo’ when Alex recounts, later that night, how he managed to beat out Hunter on their final by ten points.

He isn’t expecting the ‘u up?’ text when it dings on his phone at exactly 12:58 AM. But he has finals tomorrow and has been studying since June and Nora left, and Alex shrugs his shoulders as he fires back a quick affirmative text to Hunter. It’s not even five minutes before he gets an ‘omw’ text back (because Hunter has roommates and Alex is lucky to have a shitty but private one bedroom above a deli). He continues studying until he hears the familiar knocking on the door, and he lets Hunter in, eyes him up and down like a predator sizing up their prey, and immediately clocks Hunter’s distress.

“It’s fucking dumb but I’ve just had a bad day and could really use some… physical release, you know?” Hunter tells him angrily as he drops his coat on Alex’s couch and shoves his hands into his pockets. They don’t do feelings, and this feels awfully close to towing that line.

Alex shrugs his broad shoulders and stretches out his stiff arms, and he notes the way Hunter’s dark eyes clock the sliver of torso revealed by the motion. “Okay? You don’t have to come in here with a fucking sob story, Hunter. I like fucking you plenty, we don’t need to make this like, a thing. It can just be sex.”

“I know,” Hunter agrees ruthlessly. He crowds into Alex’s space, puts his hands on Alex’s waist and shoves him back and against the wall. Alex has a solid few inches on Hunter, and is reasonably more bulky, but sometimes he likes to be pushed around a little bit. Sue him.

“My fucking car broke down and I had to walk a fucking mile in the goddamn snow. And then I came home and my roommates had managed to catch something foul on fire and the whole place stunk. Not to mention my grade on Doctor Lewis’s exam which was abhorrent –” Hunter stops talking when he sees the smile that curls around Alex’s lips, like he derives absolute pleasure from this poor bastard’s pain. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” Hunter growls as he shoves at Alex’s shoulder.

“My friends all think I’m fucking jealous of you, but my kink is watching you ruin your life, baby,” Alex shrugs his shoulders as his fingers curl around Hunter’s throat, constricting slightly, enough to shut Hunter up as he catches him in a searing kiss.