#But I decided to do Childish War instead

[lilacstars15]

"Argh, I'm so annoyed! I'm seriously so annoyed!"

Man I am cutting it close but here it is!!!! Happy birthday Rin and Len!!!!!

[bellawoso]

say yes to heaven.

aitana bonmati x fem!reader

desc: gfs documentary made me cry so i had to write some fluff to make me feel better!!

you and aitana had been friends ever since you joined barcelona just a year ago. although the midfielder befriended and stuck with every newbie on the team until they found their closest friends, you and her instantly clicked and became best friends in no time.

what you werent expecting was for your platonic feelings for the brunette to blossom into a crush, which although you deemed would go away soon, never did and only became stronger.

you never acted on your feelings though, always too scared that she would never feel the same way, i mean you didnt even know if aitana was into girls or not, let alone whether she liked you back as well.

you had more or less successfully managed to suppress your feelings though. the multiple shots that mapi encouraged you to take at the club you and the team were at, seemed to make you temporarily forget about your tragically unrequited love for your best friend.

unfortunately, aitana wasnt the only one known in the team for not dating. and honestly, if anyone knew why you were laying off dating, they would not be able to blame you. however, as aitana wasnt one for teasing and pranking her teammates, they chose to not tease her for her inability to settle with anyone. opposite to aitana, you loved joining prank wars with vicky, jana, bruna, salma, pina and patri. which left you on the receiving end of relentless bullying about your lack of love life.

this night out in london was no exception, except this time, the group had decided to instead try help you find someone, and had now made it a contest of who could find someone for you first.

the rest of the team including aitana, who were much more mature than your group, had decided to come up to your table and sit with you all, making sure you wouldnt get into trouble. they had soon caught onto what your group was trying to do, and seeing the permanent pout on your face made it even funnier.

one person who was not amused though, was aitana herself, with her heart racing with fear every time someone pointed a random person out for you, and a scowl each time you winced when patri elbowed your ribs for saying no.

eventually it became too much for the midfielder to handle, as she told the group to grow up and stop being so immature and childish, before pulling you onto her lap.

your eyes widened in surprise and your cheeks flushed red as aitana then decided to loop her arms around your waist, her fingertips just dipping under the waistband of your skirt to rub small circles into your skin. your spine involuntarily shivered at the prospect of having aitana this close, and you blushed once again as she lent towards your ear to whisper something to you.

was this best friend behaviour in spain? honestly you werent too sure, but judging by the smirk that lucy sent your way, you were guessing that what you and aitana were doing was leaning more to the couple side of things.

most other people on the team who were sat around the table also seemed surprised and also amused at aitanas sudden behaviour. until vicky burst out laughing, interrupting everyones conversations as she said “i think i know someone whos perfect for y/n!” as she sent a very obvious wink at aitana, making you throw a cup coaster from the table at her head.

however it seemed that aitana hadnt found what vicky said amusing, as you felt her tense up behind you and her hands unravelled themselves from around your waist, before lightly shoving you off her lap onto the seat next to you, claiming she needed to use the bathroom.

you didnt see aitana for the rest of the night, she clung very closely to keira and ona much to your dismay. so to distract yourself from your crushes unusual and confusing behaviour, you decided to fully let loose. and what better way to do that than let pina and patri almost control your whole night, the duo were infamously known for their wild partying antics. so this came to a shock to everyone when you teamed up with them for the night, as you were know for your love to have a peaceful night in by yourself.

one of pina and patris dares was for you to somehow you and them free drinks, they waited at the end of the bar for you, incase they noticed you feeling uncomfortable and to also collect their drinks after. aitana and almost all of the rest of the team who had gone out that night were sat back down at the booth, all in their own little conversations.

you however had managed to find a spanish girl who looked to be in her late thirties, who you were almost certain looked easy enough to convince to get you free drinks. although your slightly tipsy state had you misunderstanding the dare, thinking they meant to get drinks for the entire table, which in theory it was almost impossible to get someone to buy that many drinks for a stranger. but you were a woman on a mission, and you didnt want to fail this dare at all, and you were determined to have a better night than aitana, who seemed to be completely ignoring you.

after talking and flirting with the woman for a bit, she offered to buy you a drink, to which you responded you were supposed to be getting your whole table drinks now. but as soon as you saw her pull a sleek black card out of her wallet, you knew you would be winning this dare. you managed to remember most peoples drinks, and glanced over to pina and patri who had looks of shock and disbelief on their faces at the number of drinks being made for you.

it was even better when she offered to take the two trays over to your booth after you claimed your arms were aching, pina and patri quickly trailed behind, curious at how exactly you had pulled that off.

as soon as she placed the trays of drinks down, her phone began to ring, as she spoke some fast, accented words in spanish to you, which your very tipsy brain couldnt comprehend, you quickly said adios to her followed with a drunken wave.

as pina and patri told the table the dare and how you had gotten it wrong, alexia, sandra, marta and irene shook their heads and lectured you for your actions, claiming that it was a stupid idea. whereas lucy clapped her hand on your back shouting “thanks mate” in your ear.

until ona spoke, drawing all the attention over to a very confused you “i cant believe she said that to you y/n”

you honestly had no idea what her words were, only comprehending the word “noche” making you guess she wished you a good night. “what do you mean ona? i didnt really understand it”

this made patri laugh “oh amiga, she said she wished she could have expanded her night with you, and said ‘preferably to get you in his bed’ you must have really been flirting with her”

upon hearing your newfound knowledge of what the woman said, aitana muttered under her breath of how she was tired and was going home, as she threw a glare your way, your stance visibly deflated and a deep frown settled on your face. you hated arguing with aitana, and it was so much worse that you had absolutely no idea what you have done.

you also excused yourself and began to follow aitana out, stumbling a few times as an effect of your ridiculously high heels and the large amount of alcohol youve had. you managed to catch up to her just as she was getting in her car, aitana hadnt had too much to drink tonight, so planned on driving herself home, even though she knew she would not be able to sleep with thoughts of you clouding her mind.

if you were sober, there was no way you would just rag open aitanas car door and fall straight on to the seat, but the drinks you had gave you the confidence and desperation you needed to to ask and find out what you did wrong.

“dios mio y/n! you terrified me, you cant just do that!” aitana shouted, your abrupt entrance had terrified the brunette, but you brushed her temporary shock to the side, a burning question on the tip of your tongue. “aitana have i upset you? why have you been ignoring me?” you asked with a frown on your face, completely averting your eyes from aitana. you were a sad drunk, often getting way too emotional, and the last thing you wanted to do was drunk cry in front of your crush.

“no, no- y/n, you havent! i- i just, im confused, okay? thats all, im not mad at you” aitana reassured, she avoided you tonight solely due to her confusion of her anger towards the people that your teammates had been picking out for you at the bar. if she knew how upset and anxious it had made you, then she would have stayed with you all night if it meant you were okay.

“do- do you want to come back to mine? or you can go to yours! thats fine too- honestly! i-” aitana noticed her rambling and cut herself of as she felt her cheeks heat up. “aita, i want to go back to yours please” you said softly to the midfielder. “vale cari, lets go” she responded.

as aitana navigated the streets of barcelona towards her apartment, you could help but laugh at her soft angered mutters of the irritating barcelona traffic and the dozens of traffic lights she had to stop at that she insisted were “unnecessary and a waste of time and money” as you approached a 24 hour food place on the side of the road, aitana moved her hand over to your thigh making your breath hitch. her question of whether you were hungry or not went unanswered, as you were too busy overthinking the hand on your thigh. as aitana pulled into a parking space she asked again however she was now met with your extremely flustered face.

this told aitana all she needed to know on whether her feelings for you were reciprocated or not, and the newfound knowledge that they were supplied her with enough confidence to lean over the centre console. aitana then grabbed your jawline softly, she noticed you glancing at her lips which gave her the confirmation she needed to press her lips onto yours.

the kiss started off slow, aitana not wanting you to feel uncomfortable and like you were rushing things. until you decided you wanted more and tangled your hands in her hair pulling her impossibly closer which prompted her to slip her tongue into your mouth, the kiss becoming rougher and more desperate. the kiss only ended when you were near to a point of gasping for air, and as you were still trying to catch your breath, aitana decided it would be a good time to ask “go on a date with me”. you couldnt tell if she had meant to demand you to go out with her, or whether she just forgot to form a question when translating what she wanted to say. either way, you didnt hesitate when responding “vale” with a small laugh at her way of asking you, as she turned to you with a smile at hearing the spanish fall from your lips.

———

yourinstagram

caption: shes not a very good driver 😇😇

liked by: alexiaputellas, lucybronze and 54,324 others.

comment:

lucybronze: i think we all know who that is..

-> yourinstagram: i think we all know who you left with last night (your not as subtle as you think you are)

fbcfemeni: is that caption really true?

-> yourinstagram: aitana get off barcelonas account 😭

-> fbcfemeni: its not aitana!!

-> yourinstagram: mentirosa 😬😬

user1: omg its a for aitana!!!

user2: has everyone seen barcas comments 😭

user3: not aita on the teams account 😭

[so-long-soldier-writes]

One of Those Days

poly!mikaelsons x reader | request

summary: between the constant fighting and city clamor, you're overstimulated from the minute you wake up. you try to isolate until you feel better, but sometimes, that only makes things worse. luckily, your loving vampire partners are always there for you.

tags: sensory issues, mental health, overstimulation, arguing, mild emotional hurt / comfort

word count: ~2.6k

a/n: requested by @asexualaromosafezone - i am SO SORRY this took me literal months to complete. a couple days ago, i suddenly remembered i never filled it and finished it asap. i hope you like it, and again, so many apologies!

Sometimes, you wake up, and can immediately tell it’ll be a hard day. The sun has barely risen, yet there’s already a million noises coming through your window. Chatters of people having their morning walks, car horns from those too impatient to let them cross, the distant clang of a dropped pot, and-

“REBEKAHHH!”

-Klaus, yelling for his sister. At seven in the morning. 

“What the bloody hell are you shouting for?! I’m right here!”

You sigh, glad that mystery solved quickly.

There’s probably a few more minutes until your alarm rings, so instead of getting up a little earlier, you opt to enjoy your last minutes of peace. Though you soon realize that’s impossible, given your circumstances. On top of the city sounds, there’s a bird right outside your window, and when you try to turn away from it, the tag on your blanket itches the inside of your thigh. 

“Ugh!” You toss the blanket off. 

Your alarm sounds not a second later. 

With a slap to your phone and then another to your forehead, you decide to just get ready for the day. Luckily, not much is planned. Marcel still has control over the city, and with you being human, your Mikaelson hosts don’t want you outside at all. 

See, you live with the family of original vampires. You used to be a Mystic Falls’ resident, but then after developing a close connection with the siblings, decided to move to New Orleans with them and get a fresh start. You were tired of the small town life, and while the big city can be overwhelming at times, you’ll never get sick of the culture it has to offer. Besides, living with the most powerful family makes you happier than you ever believed you could be. 

As much as you love them, though, they can be a pain. Like when Klaus can’t find his sister, but forgets a whisper would summon her just as effectively. Instead, he has to wake up the whole quarter, and inconvenience you with a headache. When you reach the dining room that day, you slump your head on the table. 

“Everything alright, darling?” Kol’s voice floats over your head, making you aware of his presence. 

“Tired.”

“Is your bed comfortable enough? Do you need more blankets?”

You haven’t been in the city long, and his consideration warms your heart. 

“Oh, I’m okay. I’m very comfy. Just haven’t gotten used to the city yet.”

“Ah, I understand.”

His attention drifts to his sister. You busy yourself with a plate of food and ignore how tired you feel. When Elijah sits beside you, you offer a smile, but don’t say anything. The man, polite as ever, does the same. Though while two of the siblings are quiet, the other two aren’t. Klaus and Rebekah are still on the same topic from earlier. They bounce off each other quickly, childish banter turning into an argument.

You try to eat in peace and ignore them, but it’s difficult. And it doesn’t help that you’ve been feeling down lately, anyway. It’s rather unexplainable, the way you feel. Some days you’d rather stay in bed all day than face the world. Your whole body could be begging for you to get up and get things done, but you just can’t. No matter how hard you fight your own mind, sometimes there’s no winning the raging war. 

To make matters worse, you’re always hypersensitive when you find yourself in these low moods. Every little thing is overstimulating and there’s no pause button. This morning, you didn’t even get a chance to wake up before the sounds started. (Thanks, Klaus.) You roll your eyes in your head, annoyed. 

“Hey.” A poke to your shoulder startles you, making you jump. “You okay?” 

“Ooh, you caught me off guard.”

“Sorry,” Kol smiles, “you in deep thought, or rolling your eyes at Klaus’ statement?”

“Uh…” You bite your lip. You were rolling your eyes about Klaus, but missed whatever statement it was that he just made. “What did he say?”

“That he was on his way to have a little chat with Marcel. That will go swimmingly.”

“Oh.” You snort and decide to joke. “Both.”

Kol grins at you, but then, thankfully, leaves you alone again. 

After breakfast, you retreat back into your room, not in the mood to face the day. If Klaus is really going to start shit with Marcel, it’ll be an intense day. You’ve never met the current king of the French Quarter, but Elijah’s told stories. Marcel and the family used to be close, but then, like all their other relationships, ties ended drastically. 

“But not with you, of course,” he had promised. “You’re our girl.”

You were skeptical for a moment. Who wouldn’t be, knowing the Mikaelsons? But then Klaus approached you from behind with a kiss to your hair and confirmed his brother’s words,

“As long as we have your loyalty, you’ll always have ours.”

You could see the truth in his statement. Everyone who ended up on their bad side had betrayed them in some way. So, as long as you didn’t repeat others’ mistakes; as long as you kept your trust in the family, you would be considered family. And ever since the day you first grew close, you have been their family. 

You’re close with all of the siblings. Elijah, first, when you couldn’t take your eyes off him at Damon’s dinner party. Then Rebekah, and then Kol, when he undaggered. Even Finn, before his untimely death - thanks to Matt, your good friend now worst enemy. Klaus took the longest to trust you, and you can’t blame him for having trust issues, but once he realized how much his siblings adored you, he was quick to accept your place with them. 

Now, the five of you live together, nine hundred miles from your hometown. It’s certainly a change, but every day with them is an adventure.

Like today, you suddenly think, overhearing Elijah’s footsteps in the hallway. Today has definitely been one of those days. 

“Y/N?” He stops outside your door.

“Mhm?”

“Can I come in?”

“Sure.”

Elijah opens the door, but doesn’t fully enter your room. He looks you up and down before smiling. “I just thought you seemed sad earlier and wanted to check on you. Is everything okay?”

“Oh!” You put on a brave face to mask the tiredness you feel internally. “Yeah, I’m just out of sorts today. It’s nothing.”

“Are you sure? Because if someone’s bothering you, that’s something we can take care of.”

“No, no, I promise. It’s all just me. Just having a day.”

“You’re positive?” He asks for confirmation again.

“Have I ever lied to you, ‘Lijah?”

He looks down at his shoes, embarrassed. “No, you haven’t. I apologize for doubting you.”

“It’s okay,” you step closer to him, resting against the door frame. “No need to apologize. But I swear, I just… woke up on the wrong side of the bed or something. New Orleans is a loud city. I’m still adjusting.”

“Okay. Well, call if you need anything. Even the smallest thing.”

“I will.”

“Oh, and be careful in the off-chance that Marcel storms in here. There’s a fight brewing in the quarter.”

“I’ll keep an eye out.”

“Better yet, stay inside for the day. So you’re not in harm’s way at all.”

“Okay, ‘Lijah.”

He smiles at you, then kisses your hand. “Now, I need to neutralize my brother. But I needed to make sure our girl was okay first.”

“She’s okay. Go deal with him.”

Elijah straightens his collar before speeding off to no doubt defend his brother in a fight. You love Klaus, but man, does he get angry. And then from anger, comes pure rage, then absolute chaos. Once situations escalate that far, the whole block better hide if they want to keep their hearts in their chest. 

You sigh, thinking of the carnage that may come. You’re not sure you can deal with his anger issues today, especially not coupled with those of Marcel. Of all the days they have to fight, it’s the one that you might snap, too, if he raises his voice one more time. 

Suddenly, your bed looks like the perfect oasis away from the mess behind your door. A good pillow over the ears might prevent an impending meltdown. You crawl into it at once and let your body melt into the mattress. 

You hadn’t lied to Elijah, though you hadn’t given him the full truth, either. Yes, you are, in general, okay. Not necessarily today, but at that moment, you were. Also yes, you’re not feeling great today, partly because of all the city noise. And, finally, yes, most of it is just you and your body not in the mood to be awake. Though Klaus is contributing, just a little bit, to your mental distress today. Elijah would understand, of course, but then he’d have a talk with his brother about it, and you really didn’t want to burden either of them in that way, so you put on a smile and didn’t mention it. You’d bet Elijah knows the full truth, and knows why you won’t admit it, but he respects you if you don’t want to talk about it. That’s one of the reasons you love him so much. 

You get a couple hours of rest until your slumber is interrupted by a new knock on your door. It’s not soft, like Elijah’s, so it must be one of the younger two. 

“Oh no,” you mutter, wondering what it must be now.

“Y/N?” Rebekah’s voice comes from the other side. “Are you awake?”

“I am now.” 

She opens the door as you reply. “Oh what the bloody hell are you still doing in bed?”

“Sleeping.”

“Obviously! Come watch a movie with Kol and I! We’d love your company.”

“An actual movie, or the public display of violence happening outside in the quarter?”

“We haven’t decided yet!” She grabs your hand. “Come on!”

You yawn. “I’m gonna pass today, I’m not up for it.”

“Awh, Y/N! It won’t be as fun without you!”

“I have a headache, Bex,” you fib. 

“Do you want some blood for that?”

“Does that even work like that?”

She shrugs, “not sure.”

You cuddle into your pillow. “Another time, okay?”

The girl smiles, then leans forward to kiss your head. “Okay. If you change your mind, come find us.”

“I will. Thank you.”

“Dinner’s at seven. Will you be there?”

“Yeah,” you promise, “I should be better by then.”

You are not, in fact, better by then. If anything, your foul mood progressed into an actual headache within thirty minutes of Rebekah leaving. Shouts throughout the city managed to penetrate the thin glass of your windows, and you could hear almost everything as Klaus heckled the current king. For hours, it went on, until the sun went down and they assumedly put it off for another day. By seven o’clock, you were able to sneak in another nap, but you still felt way overstimulated from the day’s events. 

Not to mention the fact that you spent all day in bed. Sometimes, you’re overstimulated by too much going on, but today you partly did it to yourself by hiding away all day. The guilt of avoiding everyone weighs on your chest. Rebekah had invited you to a movie; Elijah went out of his way to check up on you, and you had more or less dismissed them both. A bitter taste sits in your mouth when you think about it. Water doesn’t wash it out.

Hopefully dinner will. 

For the first ten minutes, the night passes peacefully. Most of the conversation is focused between the meal and the movie the two had watched. The events of the day, seemingly, are left in the past.

But then, of course, Kol has to make a comment on something he overheard that he thought was funny. And that set Klaus off into a spewing of anger. He’s pissed at Marcel, but now, also, at Kol for bringing it up. Elijah puts his face in his hands, and Rebekah sends both a huge eye roll. 

What was a moment of much-appreciated silence is now a yelling match. After five minutes, you reach your breaking point. 

“Why do you feel the need to comment on that, Kol? It was so insignificant, but you’ve felt the need to bring it up, and now I’m reminded of how much Marcel has done to piss me off!”

“I didn’t mean to make you upset, bloody hell! I thought it was funny!”

“It wasn’t funny to me when he was spitting in my face! I-”

“Oh my god! Are you ever not arguing?!” You suddenly shout. 

The table goes silent and all eyes are on you. A needle could be dropped and it would be heard across the quarter. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologize quickly, embarrassed.

“Love,” Elijah puts a hand on your shoulder, “are you alright?”

At his touch, you flinch. He retracts his hand quickly, but doesn’t move his body away from its proximity to yours. 

Klaus, although upset at the interruption, notices this and calms a little. “Everything okay, Y/N?”

“I’m fine. It’s nothing.”

“That little outburst didn’t sound like nothing.”

“I’m just stressed.”

“Darling, what’s got you all upset? Tell us and we’ll sort it out now.”

“It’s no one, Kol, I’m just not feeling well.”

“Still have a headache, sweetheart?” Rebekah asks. 

“You have a headache?” Klaus butts in. 

The assortment of questions makes you drop your head. It nearly hits the table, but Elijah grabs your frame before you can fall. Tears form in your eyes, visibly. 

“I’m just really overstimulated today. I woke up weird and this city is loud, and then there was all the fighting all day long, and then I hid in my room all day, but then I felt bad about hiding, and now I’m making you all worried because I can’t get my shit under control!”

“And that’s your fault, how?” Elijah asks, “you cannot blame yourself for the way you feel.”

“But I need to handle my emotions better. I’m sorry.”

“No apologies necessary, love,” Klaus adds, “I certainly haven’t helped, fighting with children all day.”

“Niklaus,” Elijah warns, but Klaus doesn’t argue with him this time. 

“I should’ve stayed with you when you said you had a headache.”

“Don’t blame yourself either, Bex. It’s not your fault.”

“But we could’ve cuddled,” she frowns.

“It’s okay. I got a nap, and it helped a little. I just need to get used to my life being different now. None of you are at fault.”

“Nor are you,” the eldest reminds, “it’s been quite a day for us all.”

Kol clears his throat, “say, after dinner, if you feel up to it, we could all watch a movie and cuddle around you? I think some comfort is much needed.”

“Sure,” you agree, “but I might fall asleep during it.”

“That’s quite alright,” he smiles. He then stands up to hug you, but when his arms wrap around your neck, you freeze.

“Not yet, please. I’m still a bit stressed.”

He gives you a wink. “Of course, darling. Let me know when you’re ready.”

Klaus flicks his napkin across the table. He’s folded it into the shape of a heart. “We love you. You know that, right?”

You take the heart, kiss it, and put it in your pocket. “I do. I love you all, too. Thanks for understanding.”

[shelbgrey]

hi!! could u do mark sloan smut? like drunken sex after a long day at the hospital? thank u !

So, we meet again(Mark Sloan)

Paring: Mark Sloan x ex-wife!reader, cheater!Preston Burke x reader.

Summary: The story of two people that always seemed to find their way back to each other. Mark and y/n devorced after he cheated on her with Addison. Y/n moved to Seattle with Derek to start a new life. She starts dating Preston Burke. When Mark comes back, him and his ex-wife don't go down the same road Derek and Addison did, but instead decide to be petty and attack each other in the most childish ways. Mark still loves her though and knows she can do better than someone like Burke and would do anything to get her back. But what happens when she gets cheated on again and a bottle of grown up juice leads her back to the arms of her ex-husband.

Warrings: SMUT, alcohol, enemies back to lovers, unprotected sex, drunk sex, ex husband and wife, Burke cheating, riding.

MasterList ML2

“And bein' apart ain't easy on this love affair

Two strangers learn to fall in love again

I get the joy of rediscovering you”

She hated how everything reminded her of him, even though she was far away from New York and her name was no longer Sloan, There were still small and big triggers that made his face pop in her mind. Y/n and Derek had this case. A 15 year old named Jake Burton, he had advanced craniodiaphyseal dysplasia. Now, naturally y/n was on this case because she specialized in pediatric surgery, but a case like this you'd need a plastic surgeon as well. 

The hospital didn't have a plastic surgeon who took advanced cases like this, so naturally Webber called Mark. Weber had a thing about bringing ex wives and husbands to Seattle lately. 

“Invasive non-cell. With a history of COPD” Mark said, reading over my shoulder. “That guy's pretty much a goner, huh?”

Y/n sighed, she hated having him here. What she hated most of all was how her heart rate picked up just because of how close he was to her. It was so sickeningly nostalgic, his body being only a hair away from hers and his breath on her neck. She ignored it, she had too. She wasn't gonna fall for it again. 

“nice to see you still haven't lost your sensitivity” y/n said sarcastically, not looking up from the computer. 

“hard to be sensitive, all this rain gets a guy down” 

“Well too bad you won't be here long enough to get used to it” she said, grabbing the chart and walking away. 

Mark followed after y/n as she walked down the hall. He knew he shouldn’t be following her, hell she probably didn’t even want him talking to her but he couldn’t help himself. Y/n looked so good, even though she was still pissed at him. The way her hips swayed while she walked, her hair in a tight bun, he always preferred her with her hair down. “I think I could get used to the rain before getting used to your name not being Sloan. I actually asked for y/n Sloan”

“You knew I changed my name after the divorce”

Mark watched as she walked, his eyes traveling up and down her body. He always thought she was beautiful, her curves, her eyes, those soft lips…he had to force his mind to stop going there, especially after all that he put her through. “You look good” 

“Can't help yourself, can you?” she rolled her eyes.

Mark smirked as she spoke, his eyes drifting down her body again before he finally looked away. “Old habits die hard”

“Too bad it's your worst ones”

Mark chuckled again, that little smile still on his lips. “Don’t you remember the good habits?”

Y/n did, of course she remembered his good habits. The way he never failed to make her laugh, the way he'd hold her if she was scared or hurting. Y/n remembered he'd cook an amazing meal if she was sad or not feeling up to cooking. In the years they were together he would put her before him, at least that's what it felt like. 

She still felt betrayed and all the good memories didn't seem so good now, because now she knew what was happening in between all those good moments. “What good habits?” she finally said. 

Mark looked down at the ground for a moment, his mind also wondering to the good parts of their past. He smiled as he remembered when they first started dating. The dates, the way everything seemed so perfect…the way she laughed at his terrible jokes, how she'd fall asleep tucked under his arm in bed, how soft she always felt against him. 

After a beat of silence, y/n sighed. “Let's just get this case done”

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

The day was dragging on, we had just convened Jake Burton's parents to let us do the surgery. Mark and Derek were going at it in Webber's office about it for ten minutes. Y/n just wanted to be done for the day, but she still had the rest of the day and Jake's surgery. While Mark was getting a consult, y/n went to take her break in a on-call room. She had half a mind to maybe find her boyfriend if he wasn't busy. Y/n made it an on-call room and she stopped in her tracks. all she saw was her new boyfriend making out with Christina yang.

She stood there shocked and found herself feeling more frustrated than heart broken. Y/n's been through this before, but it wasn't like a painful act of Déjà vu. Seeing him pinning a bitch like Christina yang to the wall made her blood boil, why did it have to be her? Why did she have to be with him shirtless, sticking her tongue down his throat? 

Preston saw you. He quickly pushed Christina off of him and approached her. “I can explain-”

“Really?!” y/n said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. She slammed the on-call room closed, loud enough to make Christina jump and a couple of nurses to look up from the nurses station. The door slammed shut with Preston and Christina still in the room and y/n walked away. 

“God dammit” Preston pushed Christina to the side and ran after y/n. After the scene she caused, the last thing he wanted was her making a spectacle of herself. He caught up to her in the hall.“y/n, don't walk away, let me explain!”

Y/n immediately stopped in her tracks and turned to him. “alright, genius,” she snapped. “Let's hear it, let's hear the explanation”

He let out a sigh before speaking, his voice quiet. “I...I care for you. I truly do. I can't deny that, but” He looked away for a moment, seemingly trying to find the right thing to say. “I've been seeing her on the side.  For a little while now”

“Yeah, no shit!” y/n snapped. She recognized the sighs, this wasn't her first rodeo. She suspected something, but didn't want to believe it. She wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt and not let her insecurities and paranoia get in the way of her being happy. Today only confirmed her suspension. She was hurt, but she found herself not feeling as hurt as she was when Mark cheated. She blamed herself this time, she knew she couldn't trust him. 

Preston sighed again, running a hand through his hair as he leaned against the wall. He wasn't ready to lose her, not like this. He hated the fact that he was cheating, he promised her he wouldn't. But he could explain why he did what he did. “Can we talk about this somewhere else? Please. I don't want the whole damn hospital to hear us”

“Why bother, they all find out anyway” y/n held her arms out sarcastically, looking around the hospital. 

Preston took her hand and pulled her into an empty room, away from the prying eyes of the others.  He was desperate to explain. “Because you are everything I need. Smart. Confident. Talented. Beautiful,” He caressed her cheek gently, trying to soothe her. “But, she's fun. She's like me. We understand each other”

Y/n pushed his hand away from her cheek. “good. You can have her” she snapped. 

His eyes widened at her response. “No, I don't want her. I want you. Christ, I don't know why I keep going to her. She understands me in ways you don't” He let out a frustrated sigh, the realization of how horrible this must feel to her fully setting in now.

“I'm sure she does” y/n rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

Christina doesn't understand him, the only thing they have income is their ego and they both think they are God's gifts to medicine. Not to mention he wanted a family and kids, Christian yang was disgusted by all of that. She sighed, running her fingers through her hair in frustration. 

Preston could see the hurt in her eyes and it made him feel like crap. He just had to come clean about why he continued seeing Christina. He looked at her with a saddened expression as he exhaled through his nose. “She's...more like me. Her and I can talk about surgery all night and never get bored.  She gets it. She's intense”

“I think our relationship just ended,” y/n said softly. 

Hearing those words made his heart sink. His head fell forward in defeat, not wanting to accept the truth behind what she said. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to remain calm and collected. It's not like he didn't deserve this; he cheated on her, after all. After a few seconds, he looked up at her. “You're...breaking up with me?”

“I am” she mumbled. 

Preston nodded slowly, taking in what she said. He understood why she was breaking up with him; it was warranted. It didn't make the hurt he was feeling any better though. “I...I understand,” he reached for her hand again, gently holding it. “I'll always care for you, you know that, right?”

“Y-yeah” 

Y/n let go of his hand and walked away, she didn't know rather to laugh or cry. She also didn't know why it… she wasn't hurting? Walking in on Mark and Addison having sex hurt way worse than this. Y/n was more shocked I supposed, Preston seemed to be the last person that would cheat. He was level head, and romantic, way too mature. Cheating didn't seem to be his style. 

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

Today just sucked. Jake Burton was a sweet kid and just wanted to look normal, y/n knew Derek and Mark did everything they could, but it still hurt to see the kid go. After her shift ended she got ready to go home, it was the first time in months she was walking alone. Y/n would usually stay at Preston's place or he'd stay at hers. Thank God they haven't moved in together yet. 

The elevator that went down to the front entrance opened. Y/n looked up and saw both Mark and Preston in the elevator. She rolled her eyes, too tired for this shit. “I'll take the stairs” she mumbled and turned the opposite direction before either one of them could stop her. 

Instead of home, y/n found herself across the street in Joe's bar. She had been there before with her friends but never brought herself to drink. It just wasn't her style, but tonight all she wanted was a strong drink. 

“How many of those have you had?” Mark said, coming up to her an hour later. 

Y/n turned to him, she was tipsy, but not drunk yet. She pointed at him. “Shut it. You have no room to judge” 

Mark's lips curled into a smirk. “Maybe, but I have room to drink with you” he sat down next to her and brought the glass she had to his lips and sipped her drink. It was scotch, it was the only thing she probably knew to order since that was the only thing Mark drank around her. 

“Be my guest” she rolled her eyes. “don't get a say in anything around here anyway”

“Scotch, please and another for her too” Mark nodded to Joe. Joe brought two glasses and y/n took a drink immediately. “I drove you to drink, Jesus Christ” 

Y/n tilted her head back and downed the alcohol. She slammed the glass down, The alcohol making her head spin. “Hey, don't take full credit… That fucking heart surgeon helped” 

“Yeah, I heard. I'm sorry” Mark said genuinely, downing the rest of his scotch too. Mark hated she heart was broken. He wanted to kill Preston Burke, he didn't deserve her. 

“I don't care. That cunt Christina yang can have him. He had stick up his ass anyway” y/n rolled her eyes. She turned to Joe. “Joe, can we have shots please!” 

“So you're a no filter drunk” Mark chuckled, he had always seen y/n as strong. But seeing her tipsy and almost drunk was new territory. It was a little amusing. He sipped his drink and chuckled. And she was still so damn beautiful to him. “never saw the day we'd be drinking together”

“Don't get used to it,” she threw back the shot and started coughing. “That's so nasty” she cringed. 

Mark sat his glass down and chuckled again. He loved seeing that cute crinkled nose whenever she drank. “you have no idea how hilarious it is for me to see you drink”

“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up” she mumbled, taking his glass of scotch and finished it for him. “fuckin' man whore” She mumbled into the glass. 

That was a new one for Mark. Sure, he got that insult a lot but never from y/n, even after the divorce. He smirked, taking his glass away from her. “What was that?”

Y/n looked over at him, you could tell she was drunk just by looking at her eyes. “Man. whore” she repeated. 

Mark raised an eyebrow at her. There was definitely a hint of anger in her eyes. He liked it much more than he thought he would. He put his glass down, pushing his chair closer so that his knee was in between hers. “You really have a way with words tonight” he teased. 

“Just shut up and drink with me,” She mumbled. “before I punch you in your pretty face” she trailed off. 

Mark chuckled again. “Did you just call me pretty?” He teased taking the drink from her and setting it down. He took her chin between his fingers, forcing her to look up at him. 

Y/n rolled her eyes. “Don't let it go to your head” 

Mark smirked, his thumb tracing her parted lips. His body was so close she could feel the tension. Mark's cologne filling her nose. “you want me to stop?” 

Her heart skipped a beat. God, she didn't realize how much she missed the smell of that cologne, missed the feel of him this close. She shook her hand no. 

Mark smiled even wider. That little nod sent a bolt of electricity through his body. He knew she still wanted him. He was so close already, one more nudge and he could finally taste her again. his hand slid up her jaw to her cheek. His thumb brushed over her cheek bone. 

Y/n rolled her eyes. “Are you gonna kiss me or not?”

Mark laughed lightly before closing the distance between them. She felt warm and familiar. Mark's lips met hers and his body melted into hers. After all these months he finally had it. A small moan escaped his lips. He hadn't realized how much he actually missed it. Her lips moved against his, her breath hitched as she carded her fingers through his hair, kissing him roughly. Mark let his tongue part her lips more. Taking full control over the kiss. He pressed his entire body against hers, trying to get as close as he could. His hands found her hips and pulled her body so she was practically in his lap. The smell of her hair filled his nose.

Y/n pulled away abruptly. “Take me home with you”

Mark looked into her eyes. They were dilated and filled with lust. He hadn’t seen those eyes in so long. It made him want her even more. Mark nodded as he reached for his wallet pulling out the money to pay the bill. He stood up, holding his hand out for her. “Come on” He murmured, grabbing her hand and almost dragging her out of the bar. 

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

As soon as they got to Mark's apartment, her lips were back on his, the kiss was messy and rushed. Y/n quickly pushed his leather jacket off his shoulders as he pushed her backwards towards the kitchen counter. she moaned against his lips, running her fingers through his hair. Getting them lost in his soft hair. 

He chuckled, his hand leaving his jacket to grab her hair, tugging gently as he pulls back from the kiss. “Fuck, I love when you do that” He leans in again, kissing her roughly as he walks her backwards until her back hits the counter.

Y/n moaned, pulling away from the kiss and left messy kisses and love bites down his neck. He groans in pleasure as he feels her teeth marks on his neck. He sets her down on the counter, stepping between her legs as he leans in to kiss her again, his hands gripping her face. “You're gonna leave marks all over me, aren't you?” He murmurs against her lips.

“maybe”

He grins, his eyes darkening with desire as he reaches up to grab the back of her head, holding her in place as he kisses her again, his tongue pushing past her lips. she moaned against his lips, their tongues tangling together roughly as her hands traveled to the buttons of his shirt and tugged them open. He breaks the kiss only long enough to pull his shirt over his head, revealing his toned chest. He goes back to kissing her, his hands roaming down her sides. “You're overdressed”

Y/n’s eyes traveled down his toned chest. She'll never get tired of staring at him, he was perfect in every way. Her fingers trailed down his chest, tracing every muscle. “do something about it”

His breath hitches at her touch, and he quickly moves his hands to the hem of her dress, slowly sliding it up her thighs. “I thought you'd never ask,” He kisses her neck, carefully pulling the dress higher as he moves his lips lower. “Missed this” 

“M-me too” she said softly, tugging at his hair he inhales deeply as he buries his face between her breasts, his hands squeezing her thighs possessively. He slowly drags his fingers up her thighs, hooking them around his arms as he tries to pull her legs around his waist. “Damn it”

“I forgot how good you feel” y/n moaned softly at the feeling of his facial hair brushing over the skin on her breasts. She wrapped her legs around his waist and gripped the muscles on his biceps. 

His eyes darken with lust as he grabs her waist, one hand trailing up her back to tangle in her hair. He kisses her roughly, biting her bottom lip before pulling back slightly to look at her. “Better than good, baby” He starts to carry her towards the bedroom. 

He kicks the door to his bedroom open, stumbling inside with her legs wrapped tightly around his waist. He falls backwards onto the bed, pulling her on top of him as he starts to unhook her dress. “Fuck this dress is cute” 

He quickly removes her dress, tossing it aside as he takes in her appearance. He groans appreciatively, running his hands up her sides and over her ribcage possessively. “Damn” He murmurs, his eyes roaming over her. 

she reaches for his belt, quickly unbuckling it and tugging it out of the loops of his pants. His abs tense under her touch as she unbuckles his belt, his hands going to her waist to help pull her closer as he lifts his hips to help her remove his pants. He's only wearing a pair of black boxers now, his toned stomach on full display. 

her breath hitched as she took him in again for the first time in a long time. She sat in his lap, nothing covering her but her bra and painties as her fingers brushed over his hot skin. 

He lets out a low growl, his hands going to her hips as he pulls her closer, his boxers the only thing separating them. He leans in to kiss her, his lips hard against hers as he grinds his hips up against hers. “Fuck, I missed this” 

she moaned against his lips as his hardened cock pressed against her clothed core. “M-me too” 

His hands go to her back, unhooking her bra with expert precision. He breaks the kiss to look at her, his eyes darkening with lust as he takes in her nearly nude form. He hooks his fingers in the waistband of her panties. He slowly drags them down her legs, tossing them aside as he spreads her thighs to rest over his. He runs his hands up her thighs possessively as he looks her over, his boxers the only thing left between them. 

“Please” she moaned softly.

He smiles, his eyes gleaming with lust as he reaches between them to rub his boxers-clad erection against her clothed core. “Please what, baby? You gonna ask me to fuck you? Because if you are, the answer is hell fucking yes”

“Yes,” she said breathlessly. “please fuck me” 

With one quick motion, he slides his boxers off and positions himself at her entrance. “You sure about that baby? No turning back once I start,” He teases her, pressing against her but not quite entering. “Last chance” His voice is husky and deep from desire. 

“Don't stop! Fuck me!” 

With a final growl, he thrusts into her slowly but firmly, filling her completely. One hand grabs her hip while the other moves to cup the back of her neck, pulling her face to his for a passionate kiss. “Missed this.so fucking much”

“Mark!” she cried out as she dug her nails into his shoulders as he thrusted up inside her. 

He quickly lifts her up and pushes her into the mattress. He pounds into her hard and fast, not holding back as he wraps his arms around her, pulling her legs over his shoulders to get even deeper. He grins mischievously, his voice low and dominant. “Shut up and hold on, baby” 

she shuddered, wrapping her legs around his waist and gripped his biceps tighter. He continues to thrust into her aggressively, his body glistening with sweat as he uses his powerful arms to keep her in place. He nuzzles his face between her breasts, inhaling her scent deeply. “Damn it, you always make me lose control”

“Mark!” 

His pace quickens, hitting that spot deep inside her just right. One hand slips between them to apply pressure to her clit, knowing exactly how she likes it. “Cum for me, baby, show me how much you missed me” 

the knot in her stomach snapped, making her head fall back in pleasure. She cried out his name as her orgasm washed over her. She squeezed his biceps, desperately trying to ground herself. It felt so good, so intense, sex hadn't felt this good in a long time. Seeing stars behind his eyes from how hard he's squeezing her legs, he continues to thrust into her through her entire release. He's not done yet, not by a long shot. He wraps his arms around her waist and flips them over, so she's on top.

she wobbled a bit at the sudden change of position. She was out of breath and her mind was still fuzzy. She gripped his chest, trying to stay up right. “Look at me” He demands, his hands tightening on her hips. He wants to see her face as he brings her back down to earth, shaking and overwhelmed. He continues to guide her up and down his length, his legs hooking hers to keep her upright.

she moaned and gasped, looking into his eyes. His jaw clenches as he watches her above him, their bodies creating perfect friction. He reaches up to pull her down for a rough kiss, his hands sliding up to cup her breasts. “Fuck, I'm not going to last” His movements become more erratic, showing he's losing control.

“I need to cum again!” 

At her words, he flips them back over, slamming into her harder than before. He leans down to bite and suck at her neck, marking her. “Cum with me, baby. Right fucking now!” 

With a fierce growl, he thrusts into her one last time, burying himself deep as they both reach their climax together. He collapses slightly onto her chest, keeping most of his weight off despite their sweat-slicked bodies. “Holy shit, missed you so fucking much”

“Missed you too” she said softly and breathlessly. 

He nuzzles his face between her breasts, inhaling her scent deeply. He can feel his heart racing, trying to catch his breath. He wraps his arms around her waist possessively, not wanting to move or break the moment. “Stay, please” he murmurs, his voice muffled.

“I'll stay” she said softly, hoping it wouldn't be a bad idea. 

[ellouchi]

Jimmy dating headcannons (sfw/gn reader)

Disclaimer: this work contains unhealthy interpersonal practices and elements of abuse.

Side note: this was going to be LONGER and include nsfw but I've decided it's better to divide everything into parts. Finally getting this out because there is a critical shortage of Jimmy x reader works (cries and picks up a pen). Let me know if I missed something or made a mistake.

Enjoy!

— ok starting with the fluff: Jimmy feels too embarrassed to properly hold your hand, like some small shy boy. He will make it seem like you've the one who acts childish of course, holds your hand if you plead enough and only for a minute in public, for a bit more when in private. You can be lucky enough to tag after him holding his sleeve if he feels like it. Jimmy secretly loves to hold your wrist, especially in a tight grip, feeling your pulse beating under your skin (he is like a handcuff).

— Jimmy doesn't say "I love you", not in a usual sense. Instead it's always alternatives like common "You make me feel all warm and stupid inside" and the most rare "You mean a lot to me" spoken in a quiet sincere tone. Unfortunately "I love you"s are reserved for manipulation. He knows it gets people very compliant or/and defenseless. It doesn't do any harm anyway because he's merely speaking the truth. It's actually a litmus test if you love him or not, so be very careful with your words during those moments.

— primarily uses your name or alias you go with instead of pet names. Sometimes, Jimmy would use baby, babe, sweet cheeks (bear with me); dear, darling and love when he's pissed off or he tries to be condescending.

— Jimmy has a preconceived notion that your parents/family wouldn't like him, he has enough self awareness for that. Because of this, he'll try to make it seem like he's better than he is, so you better play along. If your family hates his guts, Jim doubles down, resulting in both parties wagging a war. Doesn't give a fuck about them at all after that disastrous first meeting. However, if somehow you family did take a liking to Jimmy, he's glad....but also puzzled. I think Jim has had shitty childhood, so when he is treated like a proper family member, he's lost. He doesn't want to see your family often because of his complicated feelings, but makes exceptions for the special occasions.

— Jimmy knows and remembers things about you to the points it's both scary and impressive: likes and dislikes, fears, dreams, ambitions etc. On the more positive side, this includes songs, books, movies, comics and anything like that — even if he doesn't like it, he has an understanding of what it is. If you call him out, Jimmy either says he doesn't care (he does, so much actually) or says "Of course I do, you can't shut up about [thing]" (lies).

— Jimmy doesn't have a lot of free time on his hands. If both of you are free, that means you are spending this time with him. No, your plans won't matter if they exclude Jim out of the picture. This involves discouraging you or outright sabotaging you. As per usual, he wouldn't find anything wrong with this kind of behaviour. You should just stop being unreasonable and spend some time with your lover. Look, he even went out of his way to find a movie you two would enjoy watching.

— birthdays with Jimmy are weird (if you could tell from the game). If you look forward to them, so does he; if you don't, well he congratulates you when the day comes and that's about it. It's much worse when the gifts are involved, because Jimmy will actually try to get what you want, and the more expensive it is, the more positive reaction he expects from you. He saved up throughout the year, denied himself pleasures and worked his ass off — if you don't shower him with appreciation and gratitude, he will make a scene about how selfish you are. On your own birthday.

— Jimmy keeps your gifts and trinkets in his drawer (if they small enough). He has some photos of you together, small souvenirs from trips, cute notes you left him — you name it. This habit will get creepy: the things having a lot of sentimental value to you, your trash like discarded perfume bottle and cream tubs, even your underwear. He wouldn't care if you made fun of him, but god forbid you misplace or throw away anything from that drawer.

— Jimmy loves when you rely on him. However, to a degree because this man quickly gets tired of running errands. If he offers to do something it's safe to agree, asking too much will get him worked up so don't overdo. With that said, Jimmy always does small things, like making your preferred beverage during the day, calling to remind you something, doing small chores unprompted, basically covering your bases. It's hard to feel unloved when you are remembered and cared for in that way. Also gives him an ammo for fights in case you forget how much Jimmy does for you.

— Jimmy insists on driving you everywhere (so people would know that you belong to him). Also it means Jim has lots of good punishments at his disposal when you two fight: lock the car from the inside? Leave you somewhere you don't know? Or just not pick you up altogether? Better leave all the arguments for later or don't bring them up at all...

— you are one of few people to see Jimmy's playful side: he just loves to joke around you. He wouldn't like it, but your sense of humour would rub off him greatly. If that wasn't enough this man loves to prank you in small ways: it's childish stuff most of times, like hiding or misplacing an item in your house and playing innocent. Other than that, Jimmy will whistle and catcall you when he sees you and will slap your ass in public when you leave. You are encouraged to prank him in return too, but you will be pranked harder next time. Grins, snickers and snorts a lot but laughs very, very rarely. However, it's one of the most healing things you could experience. Literally restores years to your lifespan.

— Jimmy doesn't like seeing you upset actually. He's not super soft or doting, he will pry the reason for your distress out of you whether you like it or not. If he deems it's unimportant, will tell you to suck it up, maybe even make a sarcastic remark. If it's serious business, he involves himself. Of course half the time it makes your situation worse and him angrier at himself which translates to Jim being angry at you.

— when Jimmy is upset, it's best to wait it out. I headcannon Jimmy used to have terrible anger issues but with years managed to control them to a degree. It doesn't mean he wouldn't lash out on you, his partner, it does get ugly. Him hugging you for comfort is actually more frequent than you would expect. As long as you don't address his tears or say much, Jimmy would calm down with little to no issue. Don't bring it up later too, he won't respond and will pretend it never happened.

— finishing with the reminder that you will be carrying Jimmy's emotional baggage as well as your own if you have any. I hope you have strong and healthy arms and back for that. If you're not careful enough or *cough cough* stay ignorant of Jim's bad influence on you, he will bring you to his level and mold you into who he wants you to be. But it doesn't work one way: in theory, you could "fix" some of his unsavoury outlooks but don't expect too much. After years of blood, sweat and tears it's possible to finally convince him to go to therapist. Praying he would continue on his own wouldn't be enough and you would need to actively encourage Jim to not give up on his mental health treatment. Way to go!

[queenvhagar]

Bestie can I be so for real I am so upset about the way Aemond is written. Season 1 Aemond is basically book Daeron but angsty, but Season 2 Aemond is like book Daemon (disloyal, wants power). Not that book Aemond was someone to applaud for loving his family, that dude was a psycho but he was such a LOYAL psycho. Smh.

Bestie you are absolutely right. Season 1 Aemond and season 2 Aemond are so disconnected and there's no through line or explanation for why. Seemingly they just decided to go with a different characterization suddenly, maybe because they realized Aemond was fairly sympathetic in the first season.

His true characterization is loyalty to his family and willingness to do anything for them, and Aegon and Aemond are loyal to each other. Go to Storm's End and betroth yourself to secure an ally for the Greens? Aemond will do it for Aegon. Kill your nephew and probably guarantee war? Aegon will throw a feast to celebrate and support Aemond's actions. Need to take out one of the Black's dragons? Aegon and Aemond will attack together. Aegon is injured and unable to rule? Aemond will rule as regent and refuse to take the throne from him. Aegon and all his surviving children are missing, his mother and sister imprisoned, and Rhaenyra and Daemon have taken king's landing with help from houses in the Riverlands? Aemond will burn everything to get vengeance for his family and draw Daemon out to battle against him. Aemond takes down Daemon but dies in the process? Aegon orders a massive statue to commemorate his brother and honor his loyalty and legacy.

But because the Greens are supposed to be caricature disorganized incompetent and selfish villains, they hate each other and put each other down even in the midst of war. Aemond has to be an outright evil and self-interested, power hungry anime baddie who hates his lazy, hedonistic, sadistic brother Aegon apparently 🙄 and Helaena is just there in the background as a non character at this point and everything that defined her character in the book is removed.

It really is out of character and makes no sense for Aemond to take out his own brother and his dragon when they're at war with a faction of the family that has several dragons and that faction poses a much more significant threat to Aemond than Aegon does... It's really just lazy writing. Instead of actually exploring the character motivations of the two, like how Lucerys' murder led to Blood and Cheese and how the brothers feel about that, it's turned into "Aemond wants to kill Aegon over petty childish bullying and because he wants the throne." Like be for real 🙄

[devildom-moss]

I got one!! Lucifer with a GN MC who gets one of those silly chibi plush of him (in-universe maybe Raph made it) and he's low-key jealous they spend more time with it than him. (sfw please!)

I'm going to be honest, there is probably less MC (and Lucifer x reader interactions) in this than expected, but I hope you still like it! It's got a bit of fluff and a lot of jealousy. (Who doesn't love Lose-ifer being all jealous and stupid?) There's also a decent serving of Raphael in this. Oops.

Lucifer being jealous of a plush version of himself

(Lucifer x gn!MC)

(SFW)

Word Count: +1,000

Raphael knew what he was doing, Lucifer convinced himself. That wicked, lousy, no-good, rotten angel was doing this as revenge for something. Maybe leaving him behind during the war? Raphael was aggressive – but petty? Maybe not. No, perhaps he was just charmed by you, too. Now, Lucifer was being replaced.

Oh, no, not by the angel himself, but by some handmade plush – no bigger than a foot long – designed to look like Lucifer. Raphael had given you the plush last week, and while Lucifer had to admit that it was well-made, he didn’t appreciate that you had been carrying that small, poor excuse for a replacement around all week.

 It was embarrassing that Lucifer found himself so foolishly jealous. It was just a doll that looked like him, so why was he so upset about it? If anything, he should have been happy that the doll was crafted in his image. You could be carrying around a small plush effigy of Solomon. That would really piss him off.

What was Lucifer supposed to do with his childish jealousy? Set aside his pride and confront you about his desire for more attention? Admit that he wanted your eyes on him and the fact that you clung to a doll that someone – Raphael, no less – had made for you left him annoyed to the point that he had considered hiding the doll on three different occasions and burning it once – if only the opportunity to pry it from your adoring arms had presented itself? Could you just hold him in your arms for one night instead of that damn doll? Of course, Lucifer thought himself to be above all that honesty nonsense and decided to attack the secondary source of his irritation.

“A minute of your time, Raphael.” Lucifer physically blocked the exit from the House of Lamentation. The angel had been kind enough to drop some fabric scraps off for Leviathan. “Care for a glass of Demonus?”

“Do I have a choice? Are you interested in trying to drink me under the table again?” Raphael looked Lucifer up and down. “Sure.”

Lucifer brought Raphael to his study and poured the alcohol into two glasses. He had selected something a bit bitter – not that Lucifer expected Raphael to be opposed to something bitter.

“Here you are,” Lucifer hummed. There was an off-putting elegance in the gentle motions Lucifer contorted himself into when handing the glass to Raphael. While Lucifer was typically a class act, Raphael picked up on the exaggerated sweetness of it. Lucifer even offered him a polite smile. The Devildom could go through another deadly cold spell before that disingenuous smile would fool Raphael, who waited patiently for Lucifer to take a seat across from him before he responded.

“Thank you, Lucifer.” Raphael smiled and took a sip of his drink. Not half bad. It could be a bit more bitter, though. Then again, perhaps Lucifer is bitter enough. “I take it you have something to discuss with me?”

“About the doll,” Lucifer mused, trailing off to open the way for a confession – to what, he wasn’t sure.

“The one I made for MC?”

“Precisely.” Lucifer set his glass down and crossed his legs.

“I noticed MC has been paying it a lot of attention. What’s the matter, Lucifer? Are you jealous?” Raphael questioned him in a straightforward tone, but Lucifer understood that this constituted teasing.

“Is there a reason it looks like me?” Lucifer slipped around the question.

“That was my intention. It’s obvious that MC clings to you. They adore you. I figured a Lucifer-shaped doll would allow you a bit of space and keep MC from feeling lonely when you are too busy to pay them any mind.” Raphael’s words stung in Lucifer’s ears.

“How considerate of you. Mission accomplished.” Lucifer wished he had put a curse on Raphael’s glass – nothing deadly, just something that would make him feel a bit better about the honesty from Raphael. If only he had pulled a page from Satan and Belphie’s book.  

“Is it serving its purpose too well for your liking? Don’t tell me you’re honestly jealous of a doll, now. Isn’t envy supposed to be Leviathan’s whole shtick? You’re going to give him a complex.” Raphael let out a small laugh and cut it off with another sip of Demonus. “They’d never pick a doll over the real demon himself. Even I know that. As I said before, they adore you.”

Lucifer’s face flushed – and it wasn’t from the alcohol. He was moping, but he needed Raphael’s blunt delivery to knock some sense into him. If only Lucifer had asked, Raphael would have been more than happy to knock sense into him with a spear. That would have been less embarrassing.

“Sorry, Raphael. I forgot that I have business to attend to.” Lucifer stood up and smoothed his vest down. “Please be on your way.”

Raphael’s eyes widened. “I didn’t finish my drink.”

“A shame.” Lucifer smirked. “Next time, perhaps.”

“Based on today’s conversation, I take it that won’t be for a while.” Raphael stood up, glass in hand, and downed the rest of his Demonus. He exhaled sharply at the sudden, mild burn. That was not a chugging drink. “Until next time. Give MC my best.”

“Sure.”

Raphael headed for the door, stopping just short of leaving. “You should try honesty next time. It might save you a glass of Demonus. It was good, though. Thank you.”

With Raphael safely out of sight, Lucifer pulled out his D.D.D. and went into his messages. He couldn’t resist smiling when he noticed the last thing you had sent him was that flapping Blackjack with hearts sticker.

Lucifer: MC, come to my room when you get a chance. I require your presence to put me at ease. I would also like to provide you with a bit more attention than you can get from a doll.

MC: Are you jealous, Luci?

Lucifer: Perhaps. What will you do about it?

MC: I’m on my way, you big baby. I’ll cuddle with you for as long as you wish.

Lucifer: Does the offer extend to kissing as well?

MC: We’ll see.

MC:

Lucifer broke into a large grin, melting at your replies. Maybe while you were cuddling, that plush could just get lost somewhere. Who knows?

[rickktish]

I feel like this entire fandom got as far as "Dumbledore had a messed up past!" and turned off their brains from there

This drives me so fucking nuts.

Dumbledore WAS attached to an extremist group in his youth-- Grindelwald's "greater good" was an ideal he believed in, it's true.

UNTIL it wasn't any more.

It fucking pisses me off when people write fics about Harry having to deal with "greater good" phase Dumbledore because!!! the whole point is that he saw the error of that way of thinking!!! He deconstructed and decided to avoid positions of political power!!! That's why he refused to be minister, not because he wanted to keep manipulating from the shadows or whatever but literally because he did not trust himself with that much power!!! The existence of the prophecy put him in a deeply strained situation between "I have a duty, a responsibility, as a person with the abilities and experience I have, to do everything in my power to stop Voldemort" vs "I literally do not trust myself in positions of power or responsibility because I have proven to myself in the past that I cannot be trusted." He doesn't want to make it a numbers game! He wants Harry to grow up and live happily ever after, so much so that he nearly destroys all of his own plans in order to achieve that end! Calling Dumbledore manipulative and equating that with him being bad is such a shallow take. Yes, he's manipulative; that doesn't make him evil! If slytherin ambition and slyness can be positive traits why are you intentionally plugging your ears to avoid letting machiavellian manipulation be used for a positive end as well? Is it because you decided in your edgy middle school phase that the Light Side are Secretly Evil and the Dark Side is Tragically Misunderstood and you haven't grown or matured since then? Did you completely miss the part where Dumbledore utterly despises himself with his whole being? Did you miss the part where he made the choices he thought he had to, not because he wanted to but because they were necessary, and even then he couldn't keep from sabotaging himself in the hope that Harry might get just one more happy year, one more happy month with his friends instead of having to fight or die in a war he shouldn't have had to face? Grow the fuck up. Do you want me to get on your level? If you think Dumbledore was "raising Harry like a pig for slaughter" you're agreeing with Professional Racist and Child Abuser Severus Snape. You're agreeing with the guy who quit the KKK not because he didn't agree with them anymore, but because the girl he wanted to be his exception didn't survive her family's honor killing to marry him instead. How's that for a childish argument? Does that get through your thick skull? Does that appeal to your barely pubescent sense of morality? "It's for the greater good" my ass. If your year-5 or -6 Dumbledore is still making Greater Good arguments then you've accidentally transposed him with the teenage version of himself that Rita Skeeter exhumed for clout and controversy. Dumbledore was a highly intelligent cult victim who got out and never trusted his own perception of a situation again but still did his fucking best, okay? get over your authority issues without reasonable solutions, deprogram yourself, deradicalize yourself, and figure out that people are still people no matter their past mistakes and when they're genuinely doing the best they can, especially when they're drowning and alone and trying to make the best of a shitty situation for everyone involved, maybe have like. A single ounce of compassion instead of declaring them wholly evil without possibility of parole.

[e-dubbc11]

OK, to make up for making you cry listening to my angsty ass song and writing such a fkn beautiful angsty ass fic for Billy, lets go full swing the other way and do a birthday prompt: ❝You did this all for me?❞/❝Of course, you deserve to have the best day.❞ for the one and only Billy Russo. Because we all know that man never had a good birthday and we are ALL ABOUT giving him one to make up for it! LOVE YOU!!!

Hello my lovely friend! You know I do not mind at all any prompt you want to send me, even if it makes me cry. I’m here for all of it but I am happy you picked something very fluffy this time around though! ♥️ I hope you like it and that I did justice to your ask, thank you again! I appreciate all of your support ♥️♥️♥️ Love you too!

A Hole in One

Photos are not mine. They are courtesy of Pinterest/Google.

Pairing: Billy Russo x F! Reader

Warnings: None really, fluffy bunnies and unicorns, quick mention of Billy’s abandonment

Word Count: 2.5K-ish

Summary: Billy’s never had a birthday worth celebrating so you decide to give him one

A/N: I am so sorry I haven’t finished everyone’s asks yet, I have one more pretty close to being finished after this one and then I think I have three more after that one. It’s been a very busy fall season plus I’m going on vacation tomorrow. So like I said before, I WILL finish everyone’s ask, it’s just taking longer than I thought it would. Thank you all for your patience♥️

He almost didn’t even want to tell you when his birthday was.

Any holiday or birthday was always a sore subject and you couldn’t blame him. Knowing that somewhere out there, he had a mother that had signed away all of her parental rights like he had never meant anything to her, Billy didn’t really see the point in celebrating anything having to grow up in the Ray of Hope group home.

You could see the anger in his eyes, the tightness in his jaw, and hear the bitterness in his voice when he talked about it, which was also difficult to pry out of him. At first, he never wanted to talk about any of it…his mother, the group home, or war and that was ok with you.

“You let me in when you want to, Billy. It’s ok.” You had said to him.

Through clenched teeth, he finally told you the story about the raised scar on his shoulder; it was where his rotator cuff was torn. Nervously, he rolled his shoulder backwards, probably out of habit from when he had to rehabilitate his arm after it was broken in three places.

No child should have to go through what Billy did and you wanted to give him something that he’s never had…a happy birthday.

Given how reluctant he was to even tell you when his birthday was, you decided to respect that Billy didn’t want a big fanfare for his birthday. Instead, you planned something intimate just for the two of you at home. He may not like his birthday to be a big deal but Billy was a big deal to you; no one had ever made you feel the way he did…so loved, so desired, and like you were the only woman in the world.

You wanted him to feel as special as you do when he spoils you rotten.

In a very clandestine way, you’ve been asking Billy questions like what flavor cake is his favorite (of course it’s chocolate), favorite meal (hopefully it’s something you’re able to cook), and something maybe a little silly and childish that he’s always wanted to try (miniature golf).

You were very thankful Billy worked late a lot of the time. It gave you time to prepare everything you had planned for his birthday. In the early evenings leading up to his birthday, you were able to sneak in everything you needed to for a round of mini golf you wanted to set up around the penthouse, you ordered his birthday cake, and made sure his gift would be ready on time.

Even though you didn’t want to, you took a shortcut for Billy’s birthday dinner. Beef Wellington wasn’t exactly easy to make and because you wanted it to be perfect, you decided to take him to Harry’s Bar & Restaurant. Your search for the best beef wellington in the city had finally ended and because of limited availability, when you made the reservation, you also reserved what Billy wanted to eat.

Everything was falling into place.

After work, you picked up his cake at the Chocolate Room and set up the miniature golf course all throughout the penthouse. You were so excited to see his face later but for right now, you were supposed to meet him in the lobby and then go to dinner. Billy was a little suspicious about why you didn’t want him to come upstairs but he let it go.

“I still don’t know why you won’t let me upstairs, sweet girl. What if I wanna change?” He said with a wide smile.

You shook your head.

“You’re already wearing a nice suit for dinner, baby. Our reservation is soon plus I have a surprise upstairs that I don’t want you to see yet.” You said.

Billy humored you, “Alright, alright. So where are we off to, beautiful?”

“Our reservation is at Harry’s Bar & Restaurant.” You replied.

He flashed that perfect smile and said, “Well it’s a good thing I am wearing a suit. Financial district huh?”

You nodded.

“I hope you brought your appetite, handsome.” You said.

Billy touched his tongue to his top teeth as he stared at you from head to toe, then purred in your ear, “You look good enough to eat, my love. Is this a new dress?”

The warmth from his breath traveled down your neck as goosebumps erupted across your skin. He was making you blush as his lips gently touched your cheek and his beard pricked your skin causing you to giggle and blush even more.

“Happy Birthday, Billy.” You said with a wink.

**********

With a very satisfied look on his face, Billy waved the white napkin in the air, surrendering and saying he could not eat another bite which made you smile and very happy he enjoyed it so much.

“I’m glad you enjoyed your dinner, baby.” You said with a warm smile. “Are you ready for dessert and your other surprises?”

“Wait, they’re not comin’ out here and singin’, are they?” Asked Billy, with a look of worry on his face and his New York accent a little thicker.

You chuckled a little, knowing that he did not want to draw any attention for his birthday.

“At home, Billy. Dessert is at home.” You said.

Billy smirked, leaned in close and asked, “Is my dessert underneath your dress, sweet girl?”

You wanted to tease him a little.

“Nope! Let’s go, soldier.” You said with a sly smile and grabbing your purse. “I paid the bill while you were in the restroom.”

“Baby, you didn’t have to do that.” Billy stated.

After slipping on your coat, you walked over to him, snaked your arms around his waist and looked up at him through your long, dark lashes.

“Yes I did, Billy.” You said as your lips curled into a slight smile.

Kissing the top of your head, Billy whispered, “Thank you, my love.”

**********

Billy insisted that you had already done enough for his birthday but you weren’t even close to being finished yet.

“I’m just not used to it, y/n. I’m not the one who gets to have a happy birthday.” Billy said, his jaw tensed with anger. He still didn’t think he deserved nice things to be done for him.

As he continued to drive, you slowly reached over and delicately scratched his scalp with your fingernails, soothing him, comforting him, and reassuring him that he was a good man and he deserved the world.

“Yes you do, Billy. I will celebrate you every day to prove to you that you deserve happiness and to be loved. I love you more than anything.” You said in barely more than a whisper.

With a quick glance in your direction, you could tell that maybe he was starting to believe you by the slight smile he had on his face.

“I respected your wishes by not throwing you a big birthday party but I’m still gonna spoil you because you deserve to have a happy birthday and I love you.” You said.

“Ok, my love. I can’t wait to see what else you have planned.” Said Billy.

**********

Billy was his usual frisky self on the elevator ride to the top floor, kissing you, touching you, and thanking you over and over again for the evening he’s had so far. That perfect smile against your lips gave you butterflies as his kisses told you he loved you countless times and the way his long dexterous fingers gently wrapped around your neck made it difficult to resist him as always but you still had surprises to get to.

“Close your eyes, handsome.” You said, unlocking the door.

He gave you a look that said, “Really? You’re joking, right?”

“Humor me, baby. Please?!” You said. “It’s totally worth it, I swear.”

Billy dropped his shoulders, inhaled sharply, then exhaled before answering you.

“I’ll do it on one condition, sweet girl. I’ll close my eyes but only if I get to hold onto your butt.” He said with a slight chuckle.

Now it was your turn to give him a “look.”

“You don’t want me walking into anything now, do you?” He said, sarcastically.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, lieutenant.” You said, trying not to smile.

Billy closed his eyes and grabbed your ass with both hands as he followed close behind you. You had dimmed the lights before you left for dinner but now it was time for the big reveal so you turned the lights up so he would be able to see everything.

“No peeking!” You said, firmly.

“I’m not peeking, baby. I’m enjoying my hands on your ass too much.” Said Billy.

Your back was to him but you could just feel how big the smile was on his face as he said that.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY!!” You said with excitement.

Billy opened his eyes and he saw the little miniature golf course you set up before you left for dinner. There were small windmills, obstacles, ramps, and even little flags with numbers corresponding to each hole. You really had built a miniature golf course inside, complete with green turf and wooden borders.

Speechless, Billy carefully walked around looking at all the little details at each hole and chuckling a little at the final hole where you have to get the ball in the alligator’s mouth.

“How did you—do all this, y/n?” He asked, stunned.

You replied, “You like it? Actually, it wasn’t that hard, it sets up and breaks down pretty easily. The wood just kinda snaps into place and then all you have to do is set up the—“

He cut you off as his lips collided with yours, his hands cupped the sides of your face and you gasped against his mouth while his tongue tangled with yours. You knew this was the first time Billy has ever had anything like this done for him, it never had been easy for him to express how he felt about anything so he thanked you the way he knew how which was physical.

“You did this all for me?” He asked.

Looking up into his onyx colored eyes, you snaked your arms around his neck, and replied, “Of course, you deserve to have the best day.”

He pulled you flush to his chest and just held you in silence. Although Billy had a difficult time expressing his feelings, you knew him well enough to know that in his mind, he knew exactly what he wanted to say. His tight embrace and kisses to the top of your head was his way of saying “thank you.”

Cutting through the silence, Billy whispered, “Thank you, sweet girl.”

“You’re welcome, baby. You ready to play? I got real golf putters and everything!” You said, excitedly. “I’ll go change my shoes, I’m not playing in heels.”

There was a childlike smile that was stretched across Billy’s face for the entire time the two of you were playing. The only time his smile disappeared was when the game was over because he lost. Like Billy, you were also hypercompetitive.

He playfully glared and shook his head at you while you celebrated with maybe a hint of taunting thrown in there too.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, baby.” He said with a slight smile. “Especially in your nice dress and leopard print slippers.”

Billy always knows how to make you blush.

**********

As you sat at the breakfast bar, enjoying his birthday cake, Billy couldn’t stop smiling or staring at you as he tried to push your fork out of the way to get more chocolate cake and after opening them, he immediately had to try on his new personalized sterling silver cufflinks. His initials, WR, were engraved on one and the other said “The One I Love.”

“What is it, Billy?” You asked before eating a fork full of cake.

Billy didn’t say anything at first. He rolled his shoulder, looked down at his cufflinks then over at the mini golf course before returning his gaze to you. Those endless brown eyes that looked like two pools of dark chocolate never failed to find yours even in a crowd of people and the flash of his perfect smile that always made you weak in the knees, made your heart swell and your stomach flutter.

He pondered for a minute before responding, like he really thought long and hard about what exactly he wanted to say.

“I think it’s safe to say that you, my love, have made up for every horrible birthday I’ve ever had, for every one of them that I had to spend alone, for all the ones I had while I was overseas, and for all the ones where I made a wish that never came true. Thank you...for everything.” Said Billy, softly.

Even as a young child, no one had ever celebrated him and if they did, he couldn’t remember it. No one had ever made him feel special or loved and he didn’t think he deserved it anyway.

A dull ache in your chest persisted imagining Billy as a little boy, growing up thinking that he was the reason his mother left, that he was bad, or that anyone would ever love him.

Tears welled up in your eyes and quickly spilled over leaving tracks down your cheeks. That was one of the very few times Billy had opened up like that, made himself vulnerable, and reiterated that he has always been more than just a handsome face to you…he was everything and so much more.

With a hitch in your voice, you replied, “You’re welcome, Billy. I love you.”

You placed the fork on the counter and crashed into his chest. His arms wrapped around your body and you felt his warm hands dance up and down your back. Instantly, you felt relaxed as his body was a warm cradle for yours and his words of gratitude were undeniably, music to your ears but the smile on his face was all the thanks you needed or wanted.

Billy tilted your chin up so he could look into your eyes and leaned down until his lips met yours. He tasted like the bittersweet chocolate from his birthday cake. His tongue parted your lips and tangled with yours for a deeper kiss as you tightly clung to him and a tiny whimper escaped your mouth.

“I love you too, baby.” Said Billy, glancing at the large clock on the wall. “It’s after midnight, sweet girl; my birthday’s over.”

The ache between your thighs had been building all night, especially after his frisky behavior in the elevator and his kisses always hit your right in your core.

Biting down on your lower lip and rubbing the hem of your dress, you replied with a sly smile, “Not quite yet, baby. You still have one more present to unwrap.”

He took another bite of cake before he licked his bottom lip and replied, “Your dress isn’t the only thing that’s new, is it my love.”

You replied with a wink, “Well…you’ll have to take it off and find out, lieutenant.”

Tag List: @wheresthesunshinesblog @idaoftheburningmind @rafaelakelley @snowkestrel @music-indie-tv @kayhi808 @munsonownsmyass @gijos @fictional-hooman @k-marzolf @nutmeg17 @vaguekayla @danzer8705 @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @aoi-targaryen @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @rachlovesactors @qu1etwolf @sweetserendipity65

Others that might enjoy: @itwasthereaminuteago @fluffyprettykitty @jvanilly @ittybxttykxttytxtty @imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend @mrsbillyrusso @colereads

If you’d like to be added (or removed from) my tag list(s) for the ever so handsome Billy Russo, just let me know and thank you again for reading! 💕💕💕 If I tagged you but you didn’t want to be, just let me know and I’ll never do it again.

[3months2mordor]

On Hobbits and Existential Dread

or Why “The Scouring of the Shire” is the True Climax of The Lord of the Rings

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Or more accurately, there lived a human who had been in hard COVID quarantine for six months and certainly felt like a hobbit, what with all the staying inside and eating second breakfast and trying her best to ignore the world, which seemed in the summer of 2020 to be spiraling towards something unknown. And she, well I, was packing for college. On an impulse that I cannot explain except to say that I had previously binge watched all the movies in my seemingly infinite quaran-time, I packed a large red volume of JRR Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings with the intention to read it over the course of the semester.

What began as a simple personal challenge to read a chapter a night instead of doom scrolling on Twitter became a profound experience not only in terms of discovering that my parents were right in saying the book was actually really good, but also in realizing that the Hobbits, in their edenic Shire perched on the edge of a world about to enter catastrophe, were more like me, more like a lot of us, than Aragorn or the Elves or Dwarves or Men who people Middle Earth. And here is why the chapter at the very end of the last book where the Shire is nearly destroyed is so very, very important.

Tolkien takes careful time in his books to establish the attitudes and habits of his hobbits who live in pastoral harmony in near complete isolation from the rest of the world. They are content with what they have and don’t have the greed that drives Dwarves to dig, or the ambition that drives Men to war, or even the worship of nature that drives Elves deep into their forests to protect them. They build their hobbit holes, smoke what is definitely pot, and eat and drink heartily. They care little for news of the outside world and tend their fields instead. That’s it.

But the world does not cease to exist just because they want it to. It never does.

As Gandalf warns in Rivendale, “We are sitting in a fortress. Outside it is growing dark.” (Part 1 Book 2 Chapter 1).

Regardless of how much the hobbits might ignore the coming of the Dark Lord Sauron and the existential threat that is his attempt to control the world, it will not go away. They will not be safe from the darkness just because they want to be and they have a supply of candles in the cupboard. And so, at the start of the story, evil comes to the Shire in the form of the Black Riders and Frodo, our hero, must leave to keep the Shire safe from the forces of darkness. Still Frodo is just a hobbit, albeit a brave one. So he laments to Gandalf, “I wish it need not have happened in my time” and Gandalf replies “So do I, and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” (Part 1 Book 1 Chapter 2).

I feel this quote more deeply every year. A deep childish wish for things to exist as we expected them to be, but a solemn and more mature knowledge that Gandalf is right. That our time has already been given to us. All that we have left is what we do to make that time matter.

But back to Frodo, who takes a good seventeen years to heed this advice, but eventually sets off on an adventure to save the Shire which, spoiler alert, ultimately saves the world. Along the way people despair and seem to lose hope. Theoden, recovering from a spell that robbed him of agency and clearsightedness, cries “Alas! That these evil days should be mine, and should come in my old age instead of that peace which I have earned” (Part 2 Book 3 Chapter 6). Even Sam, in his darkest hour thinking he has lost Frodo for good, groans “I wish I wasn’t the last. I wish old Gandalf was here, or somebody. What am I left all alone to make up my mind? I’m sure to go wrong” (Part 2 Book 4 Chapter 10).

Yet despite it all the One Ring is destroyed and the King returns and good wins. Everything is set right and our heroes get a chance to rebuild the world rather than watch it crumble. They get to go home.

Now this is a fine story and one I desperately needed amongst all of the *everything* going on in 2020. However it is not the ending that stuck with me. For you see once Frodo and his companions return home, the Shire is not the same place they left it.

The Shire, in their year long absence, has descended into a despotic police state run by a wealthy, privileged hobbit who stays in his hole rather than try to help his people as Men, who tower over the hobbits, and are specifically and on multiple occasions called bullies, abuse their power. They use their strength to take food and (let’s face it) weed from the hobbits, desecrate their land with deforestation and pollution, and create a state of fear and paranoia that anyone could be taken at any moment to prison without trial after only a mere whiff of seditious behavior. The world has come to the hobbits and they are so paralyzed with fear that they are unable to do anything other than sit in their hobbit holes and keep their heads down, hoping that they and their families will make it through.

Now, Frodo and his companions, having seen the change that can be wrought from people who stand up to bullies and fight to make a difference, see the state of their home and immediately understand the despair their friends and neighbors have fallen into because they too have felt it. These are the hobbits who faced thousands of orcs and rode in battle and walked to Mount Doom with only each other to lean on and they know how deeply despair of impossible odds can affect someone. But they have also learned that that despair is not inevitable. They saw the Ents on their last march when Treebeard said it was “likely enough that we are going to our doom… But if we stayed at home and did nothing the doom would find us anyway, sooner or later. That thought has been long growing in our hearts; and that is why we are marching now” (Part 2 Book 3 Chapter 4). They saw the Rohirrim ride to battle against impossible odds because it was the right thing to do. They saw even the most pitiful Gollum play his part in saving the world. And they saw the Eagles fly in to help carry the day.

There’s always hope if there’s something worth fighting for.

And so, back in the Shire which was not the Shire they knew but still the one they love, the four heroic hobbits do what had once seemed impossible: they get the hobbits, in their apathy and terror and existential despair, to stand up and fight. And it’s hard, and people die, and it gets worse before it gets better, but in the end the bullies are run off and the hobbits are victorious and they begin to rebuild, not just their homes but their forests and their relationships with each other too.

The hobbits, and me really, wanted to curl up in their holes and hope the world would go away. And sometimes, God, that seems like it’s the only thing you can do when darkness is spreading far on the horizon and it keeps creeping closer but isn’t here yet. But Sauron is not the scariest thing in this book. Tolkien’s real villain was the fear and despair that can paralyze you to stay in your hole until the Shire is burning around you. Yet even the most comfortable and secure hobbits have to stand up and face the world because if we don't, no one else will.

There is a reason Frodo is able to see the mission to the end. And it’s not that he’s exceptional in the way other heroes are. No. In fact it is because he is unexceptional and unambitious and also uncompromising that the deed is able to be done. He, like the hobbits he helps at the end of the series, has to get up and work to fight the evil that hurts people every day. And Frodo doesn’t save the hobbits of the Shire; they save themselves. Then they rebuild. They grow things again, not better, not the same, but they have to go on living. And, I don’t know, I needed to realize that.

We aren’t Aragorn with a throne and a legendary sword and a destiny to be king, we aren’t the Elves with their centuries of knowledge and skills, we aren’t the Dwarves with their mountain holds to hide in. Heck, we’re not even Frodo, or at least I’m not. There’s no way I could handle a walk that long. We’re the hobbits. We see the existential wave of dread and terror that is coming and our instinct to hide from it, to hold it off as long as we can and then silently accept it when it comes. Because what can one little halfling do against a thing like that?

But even the hobbits of the Shire stand up eventually. Even hobbits can take that dread for a bleak future and turn around and create new life. There’s a reason why the symbol of the Shire returning to peace and throwing off the yolk of oppression is a tree. The bullies cut down Bilbo’s old one and it can’t come back. But Sam plants a new one anyway and hopes it will grow.

I’m reading the Lord of the Rings again before this election as I did last time. But this time I’m not alone. I’m reading it with friends. I marked passages like the ones above that made me think but also ones that made me laugh because there is joy in amongst the shadows and if we cannot find those moments it’s hard to keep looking for the light. In rewatching The Two Towers film the other day I was struck, as I usually am, by Sam’s speech at the end of the movie, based on one he gives in “The Stairs of Cirith Ungol.” I think it bears quoting in full.

Sam: It’s all wrong By rights we shouldn’t even be here. But we are. It’s like in the great stories Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were, and sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy. How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad happened. But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something. Even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back only they didn’t. Because they were holding on to something.

Frodo: What are we holding on to, Sam?

Sam : That there’s some good in this world, Mr. Frodo. And it’s worth fighting for.

Hobbits are remarkable people, Tolkien says, and I hope we are too. I hope we can get through this by raising up our own Shires full of hobbit warriors to face the world and not lie down and give up. Because if everyone did that there would still be a One Ring and Sauron would rule forever.

But we have to save the Shire. It’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. We have to believe that. I have to. I will do my part to make sure it does, but first I have to believe it’s possible. We have to take that existential terror and turn it into righteous fury because we have seen what a shadow can do and we cannot let it spread again. We have been there. But we will not go back again.

[zombiee-reviews]

Ronja Character Discussion / Breakdown

• The Damsel • The Unfit Leader • The Clueless

Y’ALL HAVE BEEN PATIENT, SO HERE IT IS FINALLY!

- What we will be going over

• Her early history.

• Read along breakdown / discussion of her character in the comic.

• Why she is clearly unfit / clueless af running MT.

-

_

• Early History

From what we know about Ronja, she was born in Kiques first comic, Asmundr. She was born around the time Kainan finally rescued Lifa and returned to Asmundr, only to find out the territory has been claimed by strangers. A pack, sort of similar to MT in their way of thinking and beliefs.

Ronja is born to an old female named Zita, presumably the result of a possible unwilling pregnancy, but who knows. Ronja is also the niece of Raela.

It is also interesting how Ronja looks nothing like she does in Home, picture(s) for examples:

Even though Ronja now has an interesting coat color, she did look better in Asmundr. Only reason I say this is because, judging from how Raela looks, I’m sure her brother ( Ronja’s father ) looked the same. Kique seemed to have a better understanding on how genes worked, back then at least lol. Otherwise, can someone explain to me how you get a rip off ridgeback dog from a dark wolf ( Zita ) and a dog similar to Raela?

Continuing.. Kainan managed to kill the leader of the pack and free Ronja and her mother. Zita died shortly after their rescue and Johaan ended up adopting Ronja as his own.

In Asmundr, Ronja is shown as a childish pup, of course. She is still rather young and learning her environment, under Johaan. In my opinion, Ronja seemed more promising in Asmundr and had more personality than the yes man she is now. She was even more willing to hunt for christs sake, instead of hide behind walls and feed off a dying herd.

Then came the time the war of the shield wolf broke out, I wouldn’t say Ronja was useless, but more young and inexperienced when it came to dealing with Ranulfr and trying to cut his ankles. I mean hell, it was pretty brave of her to offer herself to help out with Ranulfr and the shield wolves.

Unfortunately Ronja stumbled on cutting Ranulfrs ankles and managed to get grabbed by Ranulfr. In early home, the scar was still seen on Ronja, but eventually Kique got lazy with details and removed everyone’s scars they once had.

Then Ronja was tasked with watching Raela and staying behind with her, while everyone else went out to fight. Eventually, a shield wolf spots Ronja and Raela and Ronja quickly reaches for her weapon. And in a very non-dramatic, rushed as hell fight scene, Ronja managed to kill the shield wolf.

And that about sums up all I have to say about “Asmundr” Ronja! Imo Ronja was very promising in the first book, but in Home she has unfortunately become a slave / yes man to the god awful RxR couple…

• Read along breakdown

So now we will continue with “Home” Ronja.

Ahem, we’re not even through the first chapter and already Kique is trying to throw a potential ship in our direction. It’s obvious that Ronja has a fling for Roamer, considering he’s the only one that she is not related too. Still, Kique sums it up to Ronja not having enough “options”. Okay, weird. Roamer should have been treated like a cousin, not a suitor for Ronja. ( Page 8)

Skipping ahead, I would just like to note.. It is nice to see Ronja retain some of her personality that is established in the beginning. When Ronja watches Ferah murder an MT dog right in front of her, she is bewildered that someone would do this over a hare. ( Page 34 - 35 )

Again, suddenly Ronja is a love sick teenager over Roamer. When Roamer decides he wants to stay with Kargo and Ferah she suddenly turns into this jealous fool, that immediately goes on the defense, throwing out her last words and then walking away. ( Page 55 )

Now, here comes the part where Ronja becomes full fledged idiot! She runs into Ranach, while crying her eyes out over someone that should have been treated like a cousin? She literally helped RAISE Roamer? I also don’t know why she feels the need to approach a stranger like that and not be the least bit of cautious? Or scope him out before making an appearance.. But anyway. Ranach works his charm on her, course it works. Ranach offers to meet up with her again and she’s already giving him a time and date! Damn girl you move fast! You didn’t even stop and ask yourself if this dude was truly safe to be around lmao. ( Page 58 - 61 )

I think about 2 days after Ronja and Ranach met, she’s already horn dogging with Ranach. Talk about rebounding, am I right lol. ( thankfully she does admit to this later, but still, ew lol. ) Ranach then gives her an ultimatum, to join his tribe - or never see him again. Back then, one would think she would deny this, because she doesn’t know who tf he is buuut… ( Page 83 )

Without any hesitation, Ronja it seems like agrees to join MT, hell we’re not even given a scene where she talks to her family about it. We’re just shot over to a scene of her and Ranach standing outside the walls. I guess we’re forced to assume she wanted to join MT? It would have been nice to see her speak to her family and the Asmundr pack fighting her on it, or even a lick of hesitation on Ronjas part. Ronja just mindlessly joins a tribe with a male she hardly knows, which is incredibly idiotic, considering she’s in a world she knows NOTHING about. She should have also paid attention to that “Unfortunately” Ranach said, when she asked if something was wrong. Why would nothing being wrong be unfortunate? Hm.. But I guess d*ck was the only thing on her mind. SIGH. Anyway, Ranach manipulates her and tells her that he fears she’ll find someone better. Ok buddy, you know that’s BS. Ronja doesnt have the slightest clue she’s being used and is being too overly trusting. Of course she ends up mating with Ranach, cause fuck Roamer right? THAT’LL SHOW HIM lmao. ( Page 88 - 89 )

Of course, Ronja waltzed right into the trap, immediately breaking her trust in Ranach right? WRONG! Then she is dragged to the Jarls den, basically preparing to get r*ped without her knowledge on it. God this story arc is already going to hell.. ANYWAY. Thankfully, she is saved in the nick of time because Arenak was poisoned by Rogio, at Ranach’s request. Then somehow, without asking ANY questions, or fighting Ranach on what tf just happened, she goes in for a comforting hug because she’s “confused and scared” ok, but why aren’t you more irate? Why aren’t you questioning Ranach on where he brought you?? Why are you HUGGING HIM? ( Page 99 - 102 )

Adding on to the next page, why is Ronja still sticking around? What she just endured and witnessed I would think be traumatic AF to her. And yet, she’s sitting there like NOTHING just happened. ( Page 103 )

Then she is seen later that night sleeping in Ranachs bed, still not making a peep about what she just endured. Granted, it could be argued that she is traumatized beyond belief, but nothing shows this. She hasn’t questioned anything yet, she hasn’t even tried to put a fight / argument about anything. Ranach then tried to consult her, but she just ends up walking away and sleeping in a corner. GIRL LEAVE? It is obvious she is UNCOMFORTABLE! ( Page 107 )

Ranach then bestows the title of Viscountess to Ronja.. Again, nothing from Ronja. She didn’t even question Ranach on how much responsibility is on her shoulders or what the actual hell is going on.. She still hasn’t shown any emotion / trauma from anything she has just endured with MT. Hell she hardly knows ANYTHING about MT why is she just accepting this? Why would she want to lead in a place that confused and scared her? DUNNO MAN. Poor thing is a plot slave at the moment to Kique. ( Page 110 )

I am unsure why Ronja is waiting to get the word about Roamer, for her to be able to leave MT. She tells Jonna that she was too embarrassed to leave, but considering how much she saw and went through, one would think she would high tail outta there at a moments notice. It’s not like Ranach is really holding her down, like Arenak would have. Then she says she really wants this to work. GIRL WHAT. What exactly do you want to work? Did Ronja really not factor in what happened to her upon her arrival to MT, STILL? ( Page 133 )

Even though Jonna was a decent character by Home standards, her behavior is a strange one to endure for Ronja. Ronja talks about leaving, but for some damn reason hasn’t yet and Jonna basically tells her she isn’t going anywhere. ( Page 153 )

All of a sudden, Ronja grew some big ol golf balls when she confronts Ferah. Ronja went from hating MT, wanting to leave it, to suddenly puffing out her chest and telling Ferah she rules the tribe together with Ranach. But I thought you wanted to leave? You are also extremely uncomfortable in MT, so why are you acting all high and mighty here? Now I’m confused. Anyway, Ronja doesn’t seem to ask a whole lot of questions about Roamer, aside from asking if Ferah killed him. And that was about it. So I guess Ronja actually doesn’t give a shit about Roamer, cause she sure doesn’t seem like she does in this scene lol. Also Ronja is still clueless AF, saying that Ranach cares about her. Girl, if he cared he wouldn’t have brought you there in the first place. She never even factors that clue in! But honestly, this whole time Ronja has been ignoring every red flag that is MT, so not surprised really. Also, why isn’t Ronja looking further into why Ferah is being held hostage in a cave? ( Page 156 - 158 )

Looking deeper into the beginning times of Ronja’s “leadership” it really confuses me. Because how is it she goes from being traumatized, not questioning anything, just accepting whatever Ranach says, even talking about leaving to suddenly acting like a mini Ranach, when it comes to the second rebellion. Why is Ronja not asking ANY QUESTIONS in this point of time? She just suddenly took on the role of viscountess ( which she wanted to be short lived apparently ) and is suddenly against Kargo and Ferah and not asking why Ranach is hunting them down? She wanted to leave MT herself, so why is she alerting the guards? Hell, she could have joined them? Maybe even ASK QUESTIONS to Ferah and Kargo where Roamer is / was? It’s kind of funny how she’s trying to kill the only two dogs that know where Roamer is lol. ( Page 173 )

Quickly we are blessed with a scene where Ronja ALL OF A SUDDEN wants to know everything about MT. Well that was a quick 180 and I’m not even sure what changed her mind from leaving there. ( Page 183 )

Right here, Ranach pretty much opened the door for Ronja to leave, but yet she decides to stay anyway. Again, this whole plot line to this point, is very poorly written. Ronja was thrown into MT’s arms and not in a very good way.. She just basically accepted whatever was thrown at her, with no reaction / questions to anything. She is brainless to Kiques decision making with the plot. ( Page 193 )

Little bit of world building as we get a grand poetry about the Matriach from Axi. Ronja handles herself well and is at least honest from the get go of where she comes from. It’s also interesting that Ronja doesn’t ask if she has potentially seen a dog named Roamer, since that’s pretty much the only dog that’s had her attention this whole time. ( Page 194 - 196 )

Going forwards, we see Ronja sitting upon a rock, gathering the tribe around. She announces the game changing rules for the Tribe, under her reign. Unavoidably, some members are opposed to her rules, but she sets some ground work and goes from that point. Axi was kind enough to attend, casting Ronja a smile before leaving. Ronja shares the smile, but quickly retracts it when Axi is no longer looking. Assuming that maybe Ronja isn’t so confident for this after all. ( Page 233 - 234 )

It’s kind of weird how Fuss jumps around a lot, at first. Why didn’t he confront Ulfr before Ronja came up to him, to talk to him? He was obviously against everything Ulfr stood for. Idk just weird. I don’t really have much to say about this scene, minus that Ronja is obviously too timid and naive to deal with the tribe as a LEADER at this time, nonetheless. I mean hell, she’s basically giving females their freedom / rights around a bunch of unwilling to change rapists lol. There is going to be a lot of drama involved. ( Page 263 - 267 )

I suppose this scene shows that Ronja can in fact handle MT. Though, prior, she didn’t really have a reason or drive to stay and change sh*t around in MT, until Ranach basically passed off leadership. I mean hell, she DESPISED MT. Anyway. Ranach reveals to Ronja that she is pregnant and then Vigr suddenly decides AFTER KNOWING THIS WHOLE TIME, to spill the beans to Ronja about Zilas. Although tbh, I don’t know how Vigr even got that information, or even put two and two together that Zilas and Ronja were even “friends.” Ahem. Ronja suddenly grows baseballs and threatens Ranach, even though later comic she is a hopeless push over that wishes no harm on anyone! ( I suppose this was an out of character thing of her to say to Ranach. ) Of course, Ronja never asks anyone why they kept that info about Zilas away from her. ( Page 295 - 297 )

All of a sudden, freaking Ronja wants to see her family, though she had many chances before to LEAVE. Well guess what! Ya can’t do that now because you decided you wanted to help lead a tribe that wasn’t even your responsibility to begin with! So! Planning family trips won’t be so easy! Aside from that, Ulfr and Ranach are basically waiting for her to come out anyway. ( Page 309 )

Here we have Jonna asking Ronja a very solid question. Why in the hell DID she mate with Ranach? Ronja’s answer is that she was basically acting like a jealous fool over Roamer, even though she basically helped raise Roamer and turned into a cougar over him. F*cking weird, but anyway- This gives her the justification as to why she did what she did. She just brainlessly left with Ranach without questioning anything. And this is how women in real life die :). ( Page 318 - 319 )

Finally Roamer and jackass Rogio arrive in MT. Roamer is worried that Ronja wouldn’t want to see him, but Ronja quickly rushes to Roamer and hugs him. Roamer then discovers that Ronja is pregnant, his facial expression here looks more disgusted than surprised / shocked, not quite sure why? Ronja then asks Roamer to stay with her and here is where the clown show begins!

Real quick though, wtf is that anatomy?? I pulled every disk in my lower back just looking at Ronja here lmfao. ( Page 349 - 351 )

One thing that bothered me about Meteor was how different the territory became. When we are first shown what Meteor tribe looked like, the tribe was in an actual crater. Here, we can kinda see that idea was scrapped and now it’s just a regular area that has a fence around it. But anyway.. ( Page 353 )

Why tf is Rogio asking Ronja this question? “Ronja is the leader of this ever expanding group, correct?” No shit idiot, you were there when she got coronated??? Don’t you remember casting a jealous gaze over to her and bitching at Ranach about it? Oh! Guess not. ( Page 353 - 354 )

Anyway, here comes the part where Ronja suddenly shows favoritism / friendship for Rogio. I mean hell, I understand her being grateful for Rogio helping Roamer, but to literally let him basically do whatever he wants when no other tribe member is looking is KINDA overstepping the grateful-ness?? Then without Ronja fully assessing Rogio, she decides to brainlessly offer him the Baron rank. She should have taken into consideration how he took over the Baron rank previously. Obviously Rogio just wants power, he doesn’t care to actually do the work with that power. Not only this, but Ronja needs to think about her tribe and who should be her second hand. This rank should take some time to THINK about, not just throwing it at the first body she sees. ( Page 363 - 365 )

I know that I’ve said this before in Rogio’s breakdown, but it still annoys me that Ronja says “And Rogio deserves someone like you, after everything he’s been through.” GIRL you don’t know shit about him! Just because someone apologizes to you on how they acted before, doesn’t just magically fix everything. I get why Ronja would want to give Roamer the Baron rank, but you ever heard the saying you don’t mix your family with business? Well clearly she didn’t get the memo lol. Roamer is not qualified for the Baron rank either and plus, none of the tribe members know him nor even got to know him yet and they’re suddenly suppose to listen to what Roamer says? ( Page 393 - 394 )

I also don’t know why nobody told Ronja that the Novas needed to be moved pastures, I know that at least SOMEONE knows, why does it wait until Rogio says something? So sure, all the blame can’t really be put on Ronja because she didn’t know that the Novas needed to be moved and she is still fairly new on how things run in MT. ( Page 403 - 404 )

So Ronja gave this prodigal speech a few pages back, where she would sit on the back of her nova and lead them into battle. Sure this isn’t a battle, but why isn’t Ronja being that “strong, brave, courageous leader” that we’re SUPPOSE to see? She should definitely go into the woods with her tribe members and help sort the mess out that SHE created with Ranach and Ulfr, but no, she won’t do that. ( Page 406 )

Then comes Rogio’s fake ass panic attack and Ronja asks him what happened. Rogio tells her and she ends up agreeing with them, that she won’t use Rogio as bait for Ranach. Then she chases down Vigr, then agreeing with HIS plan, suggesting they use Rogio’s scent instead. ( funny, because this was never done. ) I’m going to assume that Kique wanted Ranach to find out about Rogio at this point in time, but decided nah, imma drag this story out further. ( Page 416 - 417 )

Again, Ronja decides to sit on her ass and let her tribe deal with the mess SHE caused. ( Page 421 )

I also don’t know why Ronja is letting her two barons borderline f*ck in front of everyone. That would be high key embarrassing lol. ( Page 495 )

I also think it’s funny how Ronja can thank Rogio for helping Roamer, but screw Ferah and Kargo! Not a single thank you, or any other question for them! ( Page 498 - 499 )

Idk why Kique always makes his characters hide / lie about shit, Ronja included. Sure it’s hard for her to throw Ferah and Kargo out, because of what they have done for Roamer. But she needs to put her tribe first, knowing that Kargo is a wanted man will put her tribe first on the chopping block, with SolarStag. All SolarStag knows is that MT is harboring a fugitive, so that gives them validation to break down the walls and kill if they wanted. But as usual, Ronja has to talk to someone about her decisions, because god forbid she makes one on her own lol. ( Page 507 )

Okay so why the hell is Ronja not doing anything? Kargo just went ape shit and beat the hell out of Rogio, though it was highly justified lol. Ronja doesn’t ask anyone what happened, she just stares at Roamer and Kargo and then turns around and leaves two panels later. NOTHING! You’d think as a LEADER she would be wanting to know why the hell Kargo just attacked her tribe member? Especially after given the reason why he returned?! Gonna assume that she thought Roamer could handle it, but still, you have drama going on in your tribe that you’re aware of. Why not at least ASK what’s going on? Do your own investigation?? At this rate, Ronja is just dumb as bricks. She never asks or questions anything. ( Page 524 )

So instead of putting responsibilities first, Ronja thinks it’s a great idea to throw a party, instead of figuring out why they may starve soon, or keep eyes outside the walls for Ranach. Basically what I got from this scene was, hey guys! Let’s celebrate starving to death with a maniac outside the walls! Idiotic! And look where that got her! Ranach ends up attacking the walls! Then Ronja spews out the most idiotic sentence in this entire comic. “Rogio you are the strongest here next to Kargo, go protect the cave entrance!” GIRL WHAT?? If you feel that Rogio is the strongest alongside Kargo, why aren’t you sending his dusty, crusty self out there with them to attack Ranach?? I STILL can’t get over that line lol. ( Page 539 - 542 )

Ronja then has her pups and we all already know who is Kiques favorite lol. Anyway, I hate that Ronja acts like she gives a shit about Zilas, mentioning how Naeva reminds her of Zilas, girl shut up lol. And another thing, she gives them nicknames but I have never once heard her use them. And why isn’t she keeping the pups close to her body? Already she’s a clueless af mother lol. It’s also kind of funny how we get this random af time skip and Ronja is like OK! GET OUTTA MY HOUSE! She doesn’t even bother to go show them HERSELF the rest of the territory lol. Or seizing the opportunity to spend quality time with her kids. ( Page 557 - 559 )

One thing that bothers me, is Ronja hardly knows Rogio on screen. She DOES know that he was part of MT’s rapist days, so what makes her think he’s changed and won’t try to go after her while they’re alone? Nah buddy, it’s cool, take me to the meeting spot ALONE. Besides, Rogio has shown how unwell he is, is it really a great idea to take an unwell member with you? Hell if I know anymore. ( Page 571 )

Skipping ahead to Tinget, I don’t know how Ronja managed to be late for the meeting here. I would say that this goes in her “unfit leader” folder, tbh. Even though Ronja is shown to be nervous and timid, she does actually end up standing up for herself in the meeting, after everyone throws what they can at her. I have to say, she handled this pretty well, under Kiques writing, lol. Cant forget, that she also got to re-unite with Jahla and her new lover boy. But first, she is able to hold a conversation with Fraujar. Fraujar is understandably concerned, since he lives so close to MT. Ronja is able to shake some doubts. After this, she then meets Fjordor, telling him that Kargo died. Fjordor then extends an alliance deal to Ronja and she accepts it. Jahla then re-unites with Rome and they share a boring conversation. ( Page 617 - 630 )

Skipping ahead to another judicial moment, where Fraujar brings Keirr back to MT. This was Ronja’s face exactly:

So they’ve been apart, at least 100 or so days, not even knowing whether Keirr was alive or not. And her face is so expression-less and bland, it’s super hard to enjoy or even put yourself into the scene. Probably the WORST reunion known to comic history, here. ( Page 645 )

Skipping ahead, because I might as well crush all the previous Ronja scenes into this one paragraph. We’ve obviously been thrusted into a Ronja x Fraujar ship and I must say, the build up was lame. Even though.. In Kique standards, it was better laid out than how he handled RxR. But really dude? ANOTHER relationship? It’s only a matter of time before he figures out what he wants to do with Keirr, what, with him being the only single one now. I mean hell, he even tried to push Raun onto him at one point. It’s sickening really, not everyone needs someone. Kique could have made Ronja an epic, independent, single mother character and I personally would have killed for that. But no, instead we get a frail, can’t make any decisions, co-depending character like Ronja. Ahem, anyway. Fraujar here states he wants to get to know Ronja more, if Ronja was actually the badass I WISH she was, she would have told Fraujar no. Simply because her tribe comes first, she doesn’t have time for a relationship. Especially considering the fact that she put MT on a hot list, during Tinget. But what do I know about story telling?! Might as well hurry up and merge Whispervale with Meteor and just save us the next 200 pages that are coming about that! ( Page 735 - 737 )

Ok, I get it, Kargo was resurrected. But I feel that Ronja shouldn’t seem so… Happy? Maybe shocked? She should say something else like, “Roamer.. You won’t believe this..” instead of just “Roamer!” With her stupid looking face LMAO. And then the introduction of Diarko? This is another mouth she has to feed? Which speaking of, whatever happened to her issue with the herd? What even HAPPENED to her herd? I know that Fraujar brings them food and what not, but what is she now? A moocher? Is she even giving Fraujar anything in return that’s not booty? IDK. Feels a bit unfair to have an entire other tribe take care of yours and you AS THE LEADER don’t try to help them back out, or find differing ways to help your situation. ( Page 740 - 742 )

Even though Ronja is suspicious, she just willingly said she’ll put her tribe / pups at risk for protecting Kargo FROM THE CAPITAL. Then of course she just trusts whatever Rogio says, again not making a self coherent thought / decision for herself. ( Page 747 - 748 )

Now this whole scene was just dumb. Why does Ronja have to approach Roamer, like he is the leader and announce that some members are leaving? It would have been better for Kargo and Roamer to stumble across them as Ronja tries to sort things out. But as a leader, why tf are you going outta your way to cut the conversation you’re having, sprint away and tell your SECOND IN COMMAND, that tribe members are leaving? God she is so helpless. And honestly I’m surprised Vigr is still in existence here, this is the same dog that literally held her down to be r*ped. Adding to this, Ronja hasn’t done shit, aside from rely on Fraujar to feed her tribe. ( 762 - 763 )

I think my biggest gripe about this scene, is how Axi is acting. One thing I have noticed about how Kique writes her, is she is always extremely suspicious and like she subtly knows what’s going on. Why is that? Why is she looking around all suspiciously, like she KNOWS Kargo is around. Is she a damn mind reader? I understand writing a suspicious character to be.. Well, suspicious, but she acts like she knows what’s going on, but is playing dumb. But, adding to Ronja’s case, here she is actively lying about Kargo and further digging her tribe into a hole. ( Page 769 - 770 )

Here we have a crucial role in Ronja’s leadership but in typical fashion Ronja doesn’t do SHIT. Her Tribe is under attack and she gives a direct order to Roamer to NOT hurt anyone, but make them leave. So what does Roamer do? Goes against her word and KILL the dog he was ordered to not kill! And what does Ronja do about it? NOTHING! That’s right! Still to this day, Roamer does not suffer any consequences from this! So now Ronja has an unhinged as hell Baron and she doesn’t do anything about it! ( Page 802 - 805 )

Another crucial part, where she renames and relocates her tribe. Guess what happens! She doesn’t decide either of these! Yup! She doesn’t come up with the name, or where the new territory is! Kargo, Roamer and Rogio all make that decision! This is just proof that that Rogio and Roamer run the joint, Ronja is a measly side kick at this point, even though she is the leader. ( Page 831 - 832 )

-

In conclusion

I’ve decided to cut off to this point, because I feel like I have stated enough about Ronja.

Ronja is a simple minded, unfit leader with unused potential. Kique missed a mega fat opportunity with Ronja. He could have shut us all up by making her a head strong, single mother that leads her tribe with pride and confidence. Instead, she is a watered down pathetic, plot slave to Rogio and Roamer.

She is extremely unfit because she relies on everyone to do her decision making. Hell, she has another tribe feeding her! I haven’t once seen a confirmation that they’re using their own herd yet!

[wolf-tail]

General Frustration With Helluva Boss

Sometimes, dealing with Vivziepop media is exhausting. One one hand, you have the violent irrational hateboner for anything and everything she's ever touched that a lot of people, especially on tumblr, have. It feels less born out of actual criticism and that weird flavor of "ouroboros snake eating it's own tail" cringe culture that a lot of people (mainly tumblr users) feel for anything that reminds them too much of their middle school selves. Like, ya'll picked Hazbin over South Park in the "worst cartoon ever" pole. South Park, the show that made antisemetism cool to hundreds of white tweens. That South Park. Yeah, that flavor of criticism is about as helpful or productive as bullying the kids in your local dead mall's Hot Topic.

On the other hand, you have the people who act like Viv and her team are incapable of wrongdoing and that any direction their projects going is the direct word of god and criticism of any aspect of either of her shows is a literal war crime.

I belong to neither camp because I enjoy my ability to critically think.

They're a long, LONG shot from perfect but there are things to like about both shows. Unfortunately, there's even more to criticize.

The Hazbin/Helluva fandom has a reputation for being childish, (often because a lot of them are actual children who have no business watching either show), whiny, and media illiterate. A creator can rarely if ever be blamed for the stupidity of certain members of their fanbase, though. Given the inane and frankly ridiculous misinterpretation of the character of Stolas by fans who are dead-set on viewing him through the most red-tinted "Ron the Death Eater" headass lenses, if I were a writer for Helluva I'd be tearing my damn hair out. But, sometimes, I wonder if Helluva's writing encourages the kind of dumbassery it's fans are prone to, mainly, with the latest short.

As soon as I saw the thumbnail, I knew what was coming. I tried to stay hopeful, I tried to think that Viv and her team wouldn't do this, but my expectations for this show are probably wayyyy higher than they should be.

The Helluva Shorts are Viv's little way of having her cake and eating it, too. With the plot of the full episodes being almost completely dedicated to more drawn-out character driven emotional beats, the shorts are allowed to maintain the monster-of-the-week mercenary assassination type plots, where I.M.P. has a target to kill and a specific goal to overcome for the episode. (Short 1 is an exception, and strangely the best out of all of them. It helps develop Millie's almost completely flat character and prioritizes her over the male characters she typically gets shafted for.) Short 3, Weeaboo-boo, is the weakest short by far, something even hardcore fans of the show would agree on.

To spare everyone the misfortune of having to watch it, let me summarize:

I.M.P.'s latest target is Emberlynn Pinkle, a twenty-something college student living at home with her parents. Her case file actually gave me some hope for this short, as the reason I.M.P.'s client wants her dead is over bullshit and inane shipping drama, something I sadly have experience with. I thought this short was going to critique the kind of nonsense the worst types of fans (like the ones outlined above) get up to, but instead, it just took one big look at fandom culture as a whole, and like a woman-hating redditor obsessed with powerscaling, decided to spit in it's face and call it a whore.

Emberlynn is portrayed as a sickeningly cliche charicature of female fandom, a horny loser burdening her parents, obsessed with sex, who writes dumb and lame fanfics about her dumb and lame self-insert oc. She feels like she was an attempt at a tounge-in-cheek little self-depreciating humor bit about fandom, but feels stale and mean-spirited.

She's a loser weirdo for being a monsterfucker, despite half the jokes in the show being about weird kinky sex. She's a horned-up creep for getting exited about being hunted by a demon and thinking he's here to have sex with her, despite that being THE LITERAL FIRST THING STOLAS DOES WHEN BLITZ BREAKS INTO HIS HOUSE, the only difference between him and Emberlynn being that Stolas has a tragic backstory, and is a man. Blitz kills her and sends her to hell, where she gets a sickass demon form I might add,

and is nothing more than a stalky, obsessive fangirl.

...

Do you ever wonder why creators hate their female fans?

We've already done this same song and dance with Supernatural, but I expected Vivzie, a woman herself who's made jokes about the kind of misogyny women in her field of work experience, to not treat female fandom with the same "icky girls ruin everything with their stupid horny bullshit" sentiment that the Japanese incels on 2chan who came up with the word fujoshi. But I expected too much from her I guess. How the fuck did The Amazing World of Gumball handle fanfic culture in a genuinely funnier and kinder way than she did!?

Viv is just doing what she does best, creating a female character with interesting potential and the teeniest weeniest bit of something resembling body diversity in her cast of stick figures, making her annoying, and letting her rabidly misogynistic fanbase trample all over her. She did it to Mimzy, and funnily enough, Emberlynn kinda looks like her.

This short sucked complete ass, and is just more proof that Viv sucks at writing female characters. I'm disappointed, she did Emberlynn and Mimzy so damn dirty.

[custarii]

Something interesting about the demon lore from Toki no Kizuna, is the fact that prior to Battle of Sekigahara, there exists some kind of animosity between western/eastern clans to the central clan (Yase).

The main reason why Kazama seemed adamant from pursuing Sen, despite having what is considered higher ranking in blood, is the history of Yase not aiding the western and eastern clans. When they had been pushed into a blight, whether it be due to human interference or scarcity issues, the Yase had turned away their head -- thus with their history with men, they decided to ally with them, instead rather than their kin that abandoned them. Their inner politics seemed to be more partial to those of Yase, who had the influence to summon the clans, which can be due to being a direct descendant of the Suzuka Gozen and the imperial blood.

On the same hand, these ancestors' parents had already been working alongside humans for a while, though the more extreme side of this is Nagumo Shiyuu's -- his father committed seppuku because of the depravities he'd done for men, and left him to become the new head. I believe he had been 20, which they claimed to be too young (or youngest, in comparison to previous and current heads), which we can see why he acts in such childish ways. And there's the thing about him using paper cranes as his weapon -- Chizuru, I'm very suspicious of why your parents have decided to name you as such, considering that history ◖⁠⚆⁠ᴥ⁠⚆⁠◗

Then we have Kazama Chikage and Shiranui Kyo, they were near this age and had seemed to be the heads of their clan for a while. The reason for their pessimistic tendencies can be alluded to their doubts of the Yase (though they do cooperate with them amicably), and the fact that they may have had the same history with Shiyuu -- and of course, they were also too young when they had to assume the role of the leader, which is why outside their duties under the domains, they seemed to be whimsical in a way that made it seemed that they were trying to reclaim their own identities, almost to the point of foolishness. Kazama in Hijikata's route is one side of him trying to regain himself, abandoning his duties, and had seemed happier when he had saved himself in the form of his death. In the terms of honor, he had regained his pride than becoming a fugitive and slaves for men. In Saito's route, we can say he went to the opposite -- this version of pride was out of desperation, wanting to save his kin and himself by ruining his principles. His actions were always for the better of his kin, his interests the second. It's probably the reason why despite his (honestly) horrible attitude, Shiranui still stayed by his side, being in the same position.

Back to topic. Although the Jukkishuu was formed in response to the omen of war and the tragedy that they would need to kill their kin, the results have a more direct impact to the Yase -- the eastern and western clans have long sundered into their own allegiances and are protected by it(albeit we can see in the latter Hakuouki, it didn't exactly bode well for the Yukimura). The system was abolished after the incident, and it seemed rather...odd? The council was formed to unite the clans, and it was easily dissolved just because the omen had passed -- you are literally a dying kind, why would you decide to divide yourself again??

We can consider this a plot discrepancy they may have overlooked, but let's try to rationalize this into the story as something deliberate. On TnK, depending on the route, we can see how the clan politics can be followed into Hakuouki. If Suzumori Yukina didn't go for any of the dudes, she assumes Kazuha's route due to her death, becoming the Yasehime and the omen(and we can then say the omen, in fact, is for her!) would still pass. The Yase and Suzumori would then merge to what we know in Hakuouki as a bodyguard/ward (but appeared to be more of a sisterly) relationship between Sen and Kimiguku. If the plot follows this, we can say that the Yase would've ultimately lost their connections with the other clans (which was answered in the fandisc again, she was told by the elders to choose her mate despite not pursuing any). It's probably why in Kazama's route, they still took the Yase's counsel, but did not exactly tell all of their plans/actions to them. The Yase have lost(or have significant reduced) their influence over other clans after their refusal to act before Sekigahara, during Sekigahara, and at the Burning of Yukimura Estate. They can act neutrally in those instances, as those of the west cannot access them due to their allegiance to be seen as an act of treason. But, they didn't!

--also I have to interject the fact that the Suzumori's ability is agility, Yukina was able to outpace Amagiri Kazutake in the fandisc. Do what you want with that info >:3

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for accidentally fulfilling a prophecy?

So... I am not sure where to start this. I, (adult M), have a younger brother (young adult M). He's always been shortsighted. Naive, starry-eyed. The dreamer type.

He's also had these awful ideas of running away from home for as long as I can remember. He thinks he could be some sort of hero, right? It's a lot of fairy-tale nonsense. He filled his head with stories as a child, and they never fell out as he grew up.

Well, one day he does it. Disregards everyone's advice, and runs away. It takes me all of five minutes to know where he's gone. You see, our people have been isolated for as long as anyone can remember. It has to do with the stories my brother filled his head with. In all honesty, there was likely a war or a coup, and our people were on the losing side.

So of course, my idiot of a brother runs to the capital city of the nation across a mountain from us. Right into the castle, and into a girl (also young adult). Like any overprotective older brother, I've been keeping an eye on him. He lies to her, saying he's not from our kingdom. He's a prince of our kingdom, so that's just incredibly stupid on several levels.

And what do the two fools do? Fall in love and convince themselves they're going to go reunite some divided halves, or whatever the stories say. I don't know how she doesn't put things together, especially when she begins to get sick.

You see, there's an old folk legend. If someone from one of the two kingdoms makes their way into the other and spends too much time around anyone, the other person will get an illness that will only worsen the longer they stay near each other. So instead of confessing to her, he decides to propose to her, take her to some folktale doctor who may not even exist, and 'cure' her there. Instead of just going away. Well, I follow them across their whole journey. Mountainous land, and serpentine seas. He doesn't tell her anything. They get to the doctor, and of course, he heeds no warnings, just barges in and almost sells the poor girl to this strange doctor just to cure the illness HE caused.

Long story short, I barge in and kill the doctor, because folklore aside, he's just a creepy old man. And these two fools defend their actions. It takes me forcing my brother to tell her he's from our kingdom and tell her that he's the reason she's sick to get them to do anything.

I admit, maybe I should not have taken the extreme option here. But I stepped in to kill her. It seemed like the only way to get him away from his flight of fancy and to go home.

And the fool jumps in front of my blade. He saves her, and I kill my own brother. And the worst part of it all is that we look up, and it's evening. I didn't think that existed. Day and night are cycling again, for the first time in centuries.

So he was right. He was the chosen one. He was meant to overcome the sins of the angel that founded our kingdom and reunite the world's divided halves.

Everyone is happy. Even the girl who he made sick. She mourns him. But our people have met, and it's a beautiful melding of worlds. She's the reason I'm writing this. Something about being unable to trust my own biased perspective.

Things are being created and there are festivals of thousands of lamps illuminating the newly-found night sky, and my people are marveling at the idea of daytime.

I suppose I did a good thing. But I killed my brother. Even if it was for the good of the world. Am I... am I the asshole? How could I not be? He was a fool, a child at heart, selfish and willing to lie and get the girl he loved killed for some childish idea of a prophecy. But he was right. And now he's gone. Forever.

[8hsaturn]

How you're misunderstanding fire moons

case in point: Aries

TW: Self-harm, eating disorders.

Out of all the moon signs in astrology, fire moons are the ones most commonly accused of impulsivity, childishness, and trouble managing and keeping emotions to oneself... As one myself, I decided to share my thoughts on this through my personal experience, astrology studies, and the words of other fellow fire moons.

I am an Aries moon, so the fire presumed "aggression" and "impulsivity" should be 20x stronger with the added Mars influence, but ... I don't find that to be true at all. Aries moons are also expected to be self-serving and selfish and I attributed my inability to relate to this to my moon being in the 6th house of service.

That was of course until I met other Aries moons. My friend has hers on the ascendant, and another has it in the 8th house square 80% of her chart. Another has it in the 8th house opposite the ascendant and sun. a few more here and there whom I met online and each one of them doesn’t resonate with the standard Aries moon description at all. sure they do feel intense emotions, especially negative ones, but none manifest as aggressive or violent.

However, scrolling and stumbling on this tweet from one of my favorite astrologers catalyzed the realization that the aggression of Aries moons is directed at the self, not others.

Mars is high-strung, with high standards and fierce energy. When the moon, a planet of emotion and deep psyche is riddled with Mars's influence... the fallback is great when one falls short of their goals. Aries moons don't take losing easily, but instead of throwing tantrums like everyone assumes they do, they actually tend to redirect that anger toward themselves. self-harm is something I've sadly found to be very common across my Aries moon friends, especially if there's Saturnian or Plutonian influence in the mix. I also think the house where the moon is can show the area where we punish ourselves:

5h Moons could deprive themselves of their hobbies and fun activities, 6h Moons could obsess over their health or overwork themselves, 7h Moons could sabotage their relationships, 8h, and 12h Moons could self-isolate...

So to say being a fire moon, especially an Aries moon, implies you're extremely violent is very inaccurate. After all, Hayao Miyazaki, the creature of Ghibli Studios, is an Aries moon himself and Ghibli is probably the most soothing and calm franchise that's also very critical of violence and war. Mars rules control and violence, but when ruling over the moon - a very personal planet - those attributes become self-directed.

[dorkyfangirl24]

Ezrabine is one of my fav ships. Ik a lot of people only see them as “Space Siblings” but I can’t help but ship them. The way that Ezra had a HUGE crush on Sabine and then realized that maybe he should try being her friend instead, was cute because it paved the way for them to become so close. I think Sabine didn’t realize she had feelings for Ezra until she stayed on Krownest, and realized just how much she missed him.

Then when Ezra came to help with Saxon and getting her father back, just cemented her feelings. I do think tho that she decided not to tell him for fear of being rejected, and left like she had been so many times in her life. Ezra also didn’t say anything because of the fact that Sabine had told him many, many, MANY, times that she wasn’t interested and he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable again or get rejected for the millionth time.

When Kanan dies, things change. They are dealing with their grief and with consoling Hera, on top of still fighting for the rebellion. Even tho, they both know that time isn’t guaranteed, and that life is precious and to not wasted time with the people you love, there just wasn’t a time to tell each other and then it was too late and Ezra was gone.

The Ashoka series gave us soooo much hope, (and is STILL giving hope), with the way that Sabine, stayed in Ezra’s tower, wore his clothes, still kept his lightsaber, helped Lothal, dreamed of him, and waited TEN FUCKING YEARS for Ashoka to find a way to find him. Then, when presented with a choice of making sure that Thrawn has no way of coming back but potentially never seeing Ezra again or risk Thrawn coming back but seeing Ezra again, she chooses EZRA OVER STARTING ANOTHER WAR!!!!!!!! SHE IS SO IN LOVE WITH THIS MAN!!!!! I mean you don’t do all of those things for a SIBLING! (This coming from someone with a twin brother). Also Ezra never got over his crush, he just shoved it deep down, and without realizing it, it turned from a childish crush, to a real, deep, mature, mind-blowing love.

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE OTHERWISE DAVE

Even if Dave doesn’t make them end up in canon, they belong together in my heart, and so I will continue to ship and feel they belong together

OK DAVE!!!! YOU CANT STOP ME BITCH!!!!!