#But this post is already miles longer than most will read haha

[deafknell]

why anapris is one of the most ships ever

I blame @frefallingtea for this post entirely (ily)

So I've vaguely discussed this ship in a few different posts, but never fully elaborated on why exactly this ship holds so much mental real estate in my brain. The fact most of their interactions are relegated to side content (both translated and untranslated) certainly doesn't help, meaning I can count the fans of this ship on one hand.

The primary reason I ship these two comes down to one fundamental factor: they're always seeking to one up each other, and value the challenge the other poses as a rival/enemy.

Priscilla is, as we all know, a very prickly character. She does not mince her words and will only take an interest in things she finds entertaining. It's why she doesn't remember Subaru after arc 3, and why she brings Heinkel to the arc 5 meeting she was never invited to. The world exists in her favour, and that includes entertaining her, be it watching people dance in her palms or struggling against their own fate.

But Anastasia doesn't do either of those. She's in a different league entirely - a candidate for the election, but someone who acts outside of Priscilla's expectations. Anastasia is one of the rare people who Priscilla takes an active interest in, outside of her camp and perhaps Crusch.

To Pris, Ana is her biggest enemy in the Royal election. She says so directly in Lugunican Papers 2:

She's somebody Pris cannot afford to underestimate because she's so capable at turning the tides in her favour. It's a sentiment that goes both ways, as we see later:

Their first meeting really hammers that sentiment home. Going over her Camp Formation Story, we get to see Priscilla's first meeting with Anastasia, told from Schult's POV. After contacting the Hoshin company for some assistance regarding Priscilla's husband (at the time) we get to see them bicker about their true natures.

Schult observes instantly how different Pris acts with Anastasia, down to the "equal footing" and "corresponding value." Neither of them are pretending to be on good terms, but they're clearly enjoying each other's company.

Later, in the same SS, Anastasia rejects taking financial compensation for helping Priscilla out.

Both Pris and Ana are noted, multiple times through canon, to be intelligent women. They're equally capable of getting under somebody's skin, and one-upping most conversational partners. But with each other, there's that sense of unpredictability. Ana does something Pris couldn't have anticipated, and it delights her.

Pris and Ana also have that one commonality - being the two "outsiders" to the election. When Ana's heritage is brought up, Pris even defends her selection to Al, calling her "worthy."

A very common theme in most side content focusing on the pair is the presence of others observing them interact. Usually Al or Julius gets saddled with watching them bicker, largely in parts due to how neither of them necessarily reveal their intentions. Anastasia and Priscilla both speak in ways designed to rile or get at people's weak points, which makes it incredibly funny to observe as an outsider.

Just look at their interactions from Vainglory IF:

They're so fun to read, even if their back and forths seem to exhaust Subaru every time he sees them fight. It's very reminiscent of the bickering between Julius and Subaru, the way they won't admit they respect each other just a little.

Julius even says as much, directly to Subaru:

And he's right, in more ways than one. Sure, they bicker and insult each other while acknowledging their strengths, but there's more to both dynamics. One big example of that: the way both pairings tend to agree with each other the most, even with all the fighting they do.

In arc 5, Julius goes against Ana's proposal for minimal casualties, choosing to side with Subaru. Almost every occasion he disagrees with Ana is due to him actually agreeing with Subaru, something that I don't think either of them are necessarily aware of.

The same happens with Ana and Pris. Even though they're constantly at each other's throats, they're the candidates that agree the most with each other. Lugunican Papers has them share pretty much identical opinions on the other candidates, praising Crusch while dismissing Felt and Emilia:

And in Arc 3, Pris is the one to back up Anastasia's refusal to intervene in the Julius-Subaru duel:

A lot of what Priscilla says is incindiary to the rest of the cast, something that Subaru regularly clashes with. It even happens a few times in Prophecy of the Throne, where Pris will state something heartless (i.e. not caring about helping Melty) and everyone else will react negatively to her.

But Anastasia 9/10 times agrees with her and faces less blowback for it. In that Prophecy of the Throne example, she outright explains Pris' opinion and translates it in a way that's more agreeable - it's not that they want Melty dead, but they need incentive to help her. Pris gets annoyed with her, but doesn't disagree with anything she explained to the rest of the cast.

In my opinion, the reason Anapris works so well as a pairing (platonic or romantic) is due to the strong mutual understanding they have of each other. There's no hiding each other's natures, or playing to a crowd. They only want to get the upper hand on the other, but can only gain small victories moment to moment. They acknowledge and understand each other more than anyone else, and that's why they clash so much.

I think this short interaction in arc 5 summarises it best:

[detectivecarisi-1]

The Senator’s Daughter: Chapter 1 (BodyGuard! Dave York x Female Reader

AN: AHHHH! It’s finally here! I am so sorry it took as long as it did, and honestly I wanted to make this chapter longer, but it would’ve taken me like... 2 more weeks to get it to the length I wanted it to be. So, I decided I have kept you waiting long enough and to just publish it as it is. Again, if you already read my mini update this is redundant, but if not I will say again; I am a full time teacher, at the middle school level at that, so time is not really on my side with most things haha, so it may take me a while to get these chapters posted, but trust that they will be posted! Thank you all for reading, and thank you for your patience! -M 

Rating: M for language. Future chapters WILL BE EXPLICIT, 18+ ONLY 

Word Count: 1.9K

Series Warnings: Language, Eventual Smut (18+ ONLY FOR THE WHOLE SERIES), AFAB!Reader, No use of Y/N, Divergence from Canon, Mean Dom!Dave York, Bratty!Reader, AGE GAP (reader is of age!), Enemies to Lovers, Mentions of Drug/Alcohol Abuse, Politics lol, Minor violence, mentions of parental abuse. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Jesus Christ.

Whoever’s bright idea it was to make ABBA your godforsaken alarm should be lined up, and swiftly kicked in the shins.

Nothing is more frustrating than being hungover, feeling half dead, honestly waking up still drunk, and then “Man After Midnight” starts blasting these fucking rodeo beats in your ear.

Great song, terrible decision.

Honestly, it probably was your decision. The decision you made when you were trying to turn your life around for the… probably thousandth time. You most likely thought you would hear that song blasting in the morning, and immediately the adrenaline would start pumping, and you’d feel driven to get up and go for a 7 mile jog along the beach, come home make some smoothie that’s more kale than anything else, maybe go get that degree your dad’s always been begging you to do, and be driven to never, ever touch a drop of alcohol ever again. And yet, that plan never worked. And here you are, listening to Swedish Pop icons ABBA, questioning whether or not you had died, and ended up in some weird 8th circle of hell.

Honestly, that’d probably would’ve been better.

Fuck. The sun is too fucking bright, ABBA is too fucking loud, you’re too fucking nauseous, everything is too fucking much. You try to fumble over to your phone, switch that shit off, crawl under the comforter that you know is way too expensive, and sleep until the evening and its time to go back out. You’re halfway through figuring out how to hit the off button on this brand-new iPhone, counting down the moments till you’re finally able to know peace and try to sleep off this massive hangover that’s dragging you through the mud by your big toes. But before you can even start to consider that option, the door to your bedroom slams open.

“Get up. We need to talk.”

Ah, those glorious words no one ever wants to hear. Especially not delivered to you from your father of all people.

Till Leland was a rising star in the world of politics. Hailing from Northern Virginia, Till was destined from public service from the very beginning. His father, a well-known lawyer taught him the importance of argumentation skills and logic. His mother was a 11th grade environmental science teacher known for her work in the community establishing parks, teaching her students oyster shell recycling, and creating a community garden for all those who may need access to fresh fruits and vegetables. To say Till was raised by the best people put on this Earth, would be a huge understatement. Your grandparents are truly, the most incredible human beings around. Passionate about education, well-known philanthropists, and outspoken activists. More importantly, they were loving and devoted parents.

They truly raised an amazing child. Till Leland was everything they were and more. Growing up he was a constant straight A student who stayed after class to help tutor other students in math and science. He loved the environment and would often spend weekends organizing groups to help collect litter on the school campus. One spring break to Virginia Beach, Till spent a full day walking the coastline collecting empty beer cans and half smoked joints and cigarettes. He was always the designated driver, never got in trouble with his teachers, and was active in the school debate team. When it was time for him to choose a college, despite the credentials to get into any Ivy League he could, he chose Virginia Tech. He loved Virginia. Even with all its flaws, he just saw it as an opportunity for him to be the one to fix them. So, he studied political science, got a his master’s, ran for city council got elected. Slowly but surely, he worked his way up to the Senate level. He has done so much good for the state. And the people love him. The only thing that could possibly destroy his political career, is unfortunately the thing he loves most, and the one thing he can’t control.

You.

And yet, even though you had this penchant for living the opposite life your father pursued, he was still an incredible, kind, and loving father. There was not a single event he ever missed of yours, even with his busy schedule as a politician. He attended every ballet recital, every chorus concert, even the tennis games where you were mostly the ball girl. He wanted to see you shine, and he supported you in every role you took on. To this day, he has a box in his office full of shitty art projects, report cards, and handmade birthday cards you gifted him. He takes his role as a father seriously, and you are truly the light of his life. And honestly, you have a shitty way of showing it, that sentiment is mutual.

“Dad, I want nothing more than to get up, but I feel like I’ve been beat with a hammer. I think I’ll just stay here.” Your voice is muffled by the pillow, you still refuse to even lift your head.

“Honey… I really need you to get up”

Oh shit.

You can’t explain it to anyone but yourself… but his tone is off. He’s mad. He’s just short of a boil, he is simmering. He is one wrong move from blowing up. You start trying to replay the past 24 hours in your head. What happened? Why is he so pissed?

Try as you may, you can’t remember a goddamn thing.

How did you even get home? You can tell your still in the dress you went out in last night. Kicking your legs around, you eventually hit the absurdly high heels you went out in that must’ve slipped off in the middle of the night… in your bed. Great. And based on the smudged eyeliner and red lipstick on your white silk pillowcase… You came home and immediately collapsed in bed.

“I’m not repeating myself. Get. Up.”

You don’t think you’ve ever heard him this mad. Alrighty, you guess now is the time to face the music.

You sit up and see your dad. His face a cracking mask of neutrality, you can see that simmer rapidly approaching a boil. He’s already dressed in a crisp white dress shirt with a blue tie perfectly tied around his neck, his beige pants are steamed so well they barely even look real. And here you are… looking like an extra in an early Ke$ha music video.

You’re doing your best for your eyes to adjust, but honestly the room is spinning way too fast, and your focus is divided between not throwing up on yourself and listening to whatever nuclear bomb your dad is about to drop on you. 

“What’s up, doc?” are… are your words still slurring? You had tried to crack a joke to lighten the very tense mood that is only getting worse and worse in your room… but all that had done was show your dad just how fucked up you really are.

“Honey. Get dressed. Come downstairs. We need to talk.” He turns to leave. No joking, no nonsense, no arguments. 

“Dad, I want nothing more than to join you downstairs… but if I move, even an inch right now, I guarantee you I’m going to vomit all over these new sheets. And I don’t know about you, but I really don’t want to make Ann clean that up.” Its true. The maid is a lovely woman who has put up with your shenanigans long enough. 

“Fine. We’ll talk up here. Embarrass yourself, honestly at this point I don’t give a shit.” He turns quickly on his heels, and before you can even consider changing your mind, he’s yelling down the staircase. “Mr. York, come join us up here. You can get an early firsthand experience on what I mean.”

What? What is that even supposed to mean? Who the fuck is Mr. York, what in the world has your dad so fucking pissed, firsthand experience of what, and again, who the fuck is Mr. York?

You’re going through all these questions and possible answers in your head, making you even dizzier than you were before. The room is spinning faster and faster, your stomach starts to churn, you get that familiar taste in the back of your throat, and of course, right as the mysterious Mr. York is entering your room you’re lunging for the trashcan conveniently placed by your bed and vomiting. 

Tequila. Its always tequila. 

“Fuck… I’m sorry. I’m just so sorry.” You start crying like a child. Throwing up always does this to you. It’s disgusting, and it’s embarrassing even when you’re on your own, let alone with an audience of your father and some random man standing in your room… offering you a handkerchief?

 You, once again, refuse to even look up. Choosing to keep your head shoved in the trashcan, but out in the peripherals of your vision, you see a hand, reaching out your direction, holding a white piece of cloth. “D.Y” embroidered on the corner”

“No, I can’t take that.. It’ll get ruined.” You sound fucking pathetic. Slurred words made even worse by the tears.

“Miss, just take it.”

Woah. 

If you weren’t so far gone, his voice alone probably could’ve sobered you up in an instant. It was beautiful. Deep, smooth, yet with a slight rasp that was just so… sexy. 

With trembling hands, you reached out, taking the handkerchief, you swear, at one point your fingers touch his, you swear, or maybe, its just wishful thinking. Nonetheless, you finally get a look at this Mr. York. 

You’re not sure what you expected, but Lord knows its not what you got. 

Oh no. 

He’s hot. 

He is composed, perfectly dressed in a suit, now only missing a pocket square. His expression is hardened, bordering on annoyed, but still, you somehow still think he looks soft. It’s the eyes… it’s got to be those perfect, brown eyes. He’s just… perfect? 

As if you weren’t embarrassed enough. Here is this man, the image of calm, put together, and devastatingly handsome, and here you are, laying in bed, still drunk, throwing up in a trashcan. Definitely not your best moment. 

You sit there, for who knows how long, staring at Mr. York. While he returns to his initial spot by the door, and then begins staring at the wall behind you as if you don’t even exist. 

“Sweetheart… are you okay?” 

Oh, right. Your dad is in the room with you. 

Before you can even begin to form some way to avoid saying “Yeah, dad, I’m fine. Just still fucked up from my night out last night that I barely remember, and while dealing with the most horrible hangover I’ve had in years my dad bursts into my room pissed off at me for reasons I don’t even know, before he calls in the most attractive man I’ve seen in my entire fucking life right before I ruin any chance I may have had with him by vomiting into a trashcan right in front of him” or, you know, something along those lines, Mr. York saves your ass for you. 

“Maybe it may be a good idea for Miss Leland to take a moment to clean herself up before we discuss more serious matters?” 

God, there is a lot you’d like to discuss with this man. 

“That would be an incredible idea, Mr. York,” your dad is beaming at the man like he just solved world hunger, he turns to you and that grin falls immediately, “You. Shower. Sober up. Come downstairs. This is serious.” 

“Sir, yes, sir.”

[zontiky]

au where the apocalypse was never a threat or a concept to begin with

*cracks knuckles* now i could make this a decent upbringing au OR i could make it EXTREMELY COMPLICATED and you know me you know exactly what im about to do ;)

reginald THINKS he’s prepping them all for the apocalypse but reginald is a child-abusing FOOL and an alien BASTARD and there’s no apocalypse there never was there never will be. the world is safe and sound but the hargreeves children aren’t.

five runs away from home and gets thrown into april 1st, 2019. the world is thriving. he did it. he tries to get home but he can’t because he’s stuck and im now realizing that everyone reading this post has seen a million fics with this exact concept but FUCK YOU THIS IS MY CITY NOWWW

so he’s stuck in 2019 and he’s like ah fuck ah SHIT what now! and goes to the academy and it’s not like he was super far away from it in the first place. he didn’t even make it a mile away it’s like a 5 minute walk back home lmao

now because reggie thinks there IS an apocalypse he still killed himself and i hate him a lot so cough ahem anyway

five shows up on the mansion and expects dad to be sitting there in his office, doing his evil dad evil villain thing yk the drill

but instead he comes in to an empty house. mom is unresponsive. he cant find pogo (dont ask where pogo is. hes doing monkey butler things ok). and diego is climbing in through the window

five freaks out because WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU THIS IS MY HOUSE and jumps diego and diego goes down HARD because WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT MY DEAD BROTHER?? MY BROTHER WHO DISAPPEARED 17 YEARS AGO?? WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCKKKK

so they try to beat the shit out of each other for a second and by that i mean five tries to beat the shit out of diego whos gained his senses by now and is trying to convince his brother (his BROTHER) that technically he lives here too please stop punching me

luther comes downstairs.

“IS THAT FIVE???”

“SHUT UP AND HELP ME THIS LITTLE FUCKER CAN PUNCH”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

they manage to calm him down when five catches sight of diegos tattoo

WAIT I FORGOT THAT THE FUNERAL WAS BEFORE APRIL FUCK NEVERMIND SCRAP THE PAST 13 BULLETS ABORT MISSION

so five lands in april, goes to the house, and by then the hargreeves have cleared out and are back to doing their own thing more or less. he comes up to the door and grace (pogo has fixed her by now because i said so) welcomes her son back home like he never even left

she gives him a hug

reginald is gone and she hasnt seen her sun in years and dammit, he deserves that hug okay? she gives him a hug.

five pulls away. mom hasnt hugged him for years because he stopped letting her and he’s not about to change his mind now

“where’s everyone?” he asks. he doesn’t even consider that everybody is gone, because where would they go? or maybe it just hasn’t hit him exactly which time he jumped into, maybe he still hasn’t made the connection exactly what age his siblings are now, maybe he has but he still hopes he can deny it for a little while longer

grace wants to hug him again but she refrains. she calls his siblings

one by one, in the span of the next week, she gets ahold of them and calls them back to the academy. “important news,” she says. “you’ll want to -- you’ll need to be here,” she says. “your brother,” she says, and her children listen and come back home

luther is at the academy when five gets here. because, where would he go? he can’t go back to the moon, and dad is gone, and he’s never even been on a bus alone before, where would he go?

when five sees him for the first time he almost cries, because he’s so much bigger and taller and older and what happened to him??

this is his new reality. this is the new luther

but it isn’t, it can’t be, because five is going to get back home and he’s going to fix it, he’s going to fix this and he’s going to grow up just like his siblings did, and it won’t even be long before he’s back home almost two decades ago.

vanya is next to arrive, and five almost -- almost -- smiles at her and gives her a hug and teases her how she’s still shorter than him, but she has such a blank expression on her face and the way she looks between the portrait of him (he hated that portrait from the beginning, he wanted to burn it because hes back now, isnt he? and he’ll go back home and not leave again, but pogo didnt let him) stops him. it will only be a couple of days and he’ll be going home already, he tells grace, so maybe the others dont even have to come here. she nods and smiles and says nothing

diego comes a day or so later, dragging klaus along, and five is stunned by how they look once again. diego looks battle-hardened and angry like he never did just last week, five’s last week, but now he scowls and doesn’t stutter and dresses himself in black and he lives alone and diego looks so lonely but five doesnt think about it because its not his business and he knows better and its diegos own damn fault for cutting contact, isnt it? and even if it weren’t five will go back and fix it all

five knows klaus has been doing things for a good year or so know, but this -- living on the streets, giggling even as diego forces him inside, making lewd jokes with his eyes out of focus -- he couldn’t have even imagined. he stamps down the feeling of i should have been there to help stop him and doesn’t think how sad and angry at their father seeing klaus like this makes him feel, instead he forces thoughts of it’s his own fault he ended up this way and i’m going to get back and fix this (but that’s not a thought he has to force. he will. he has to. it won’t even be another week before he figures out how to get home)

allison gets there next. she took the first plane she could get on to get home and pushed off all her appointments but she had a family emergency just last week and it was hard to get away and she looks so sad even when she opens her arms for a hug and five cant help but relent and give her one. diego scoffs and allison lets loose a dig thats more of a barb thats more of a sharp sentence splitting the air and hitting her brother square in the chest. five doesnt say anything but his stomach twists. just a week or so and he’ll fix it because even as children they never said things like that to each other

he waits for ben to come last. he must be the most adjusted of them all, right? ben read a lot last five saw of him, and hes one of the smartest of them, and secretly five always thought that ben deserves to have friends that he doesnt live with

ben doesnt come

he asks mom and she smiles and he asks the others and they look away and he asks again and someone -- and it doesnt matter who because his ears are ringing and hes stumbling back and falling onto the couch -- says that ben died. ben died years ago.

ben died four years after five left

fives head is spinning and he needs to get back, he needs to stop it he needs to fix it he needs to make it all better because it was never supposed to be this way

(you thought this would be a happy au didnt you?? haha bitch think again)

(it is but they have to get there smhhh)

klaus laughs and elbows the air next to him and five asks, he doesnt beg, he asks him if he can summon ben

everyone scoffs. rolls their eyes. klaus is high as a kite and hes holding a bottle of whiskey and he looks like he hasnt been sober in days. weeks. years. and he’s a liar and ben is gone for real, im sorry, five. i know this must be hard for you

that can’t be right. five wasnt there for all of klaus’ lies and stealing and drunken sobbing. five remembers klaus rolling a joint at the breakfast table like it was last week -- and it was, it was, he’ll fix it still, but to five klaus is still just his brother. just klaus

he asks, not begs, five doesnt beg but he comes damn close in this moment, to tell him the truth

and klaus looks around and ben whispers please, klaus, just try and five is looking at him with wet eyes and he’s thirteen he’s so young and -- he can’t say innocent. none of them have ever been innocent, not since reginald hargreeves adopted them all those years ago. but five...

he tells the truth. and five believes him

so anyway five cant get back and then they decide well ok five while youre staying here we might as well buy you some clothes. ones that arent literally 20 years old. jesus these uniforms are ugly

my jaw is clenching so hard and im cold asdflksdh so im gonna end this here and maybe rb it and continue lated idk 😳😳

WHOOP this is getting away from me i know u didnt come here for quote poetic unquote bullshit but weihfsdkjdhskf THATS WHAT UR GETTING I GUESS XX <3

[nyctolovian]

Chapter 16: easy being nice to a bitter boy like him

Welp! I just thought it’d be cool if I posted fic on my birthday. So here’s a milestone chapter of sorts haha

Summary: Shouto's doubts grow

Chapter 1

Bakugou woke up incredibly cranky, even by his usual standards. Shouto was made aware of this by the colourful swearing Bakugou let out when he stubbed his toe on the foot of the bed in the morning. This was followed by a loud slam of the door as Bakugou exited the room to head to the shared toilets. 

The two headed to the dormitory’s cafeteria for breakfast (a sandwich, yoghurt and a chocolate-y drink called Milo). The sort of silence they had, which would usually be calm, was now stiff, like Bakugou was looking for the next thing to metaphorically or physically blow up. Shouto didn’t quite want to stand in the way of that.

Then, as they stood at the pickup point, waiting for Preeta to pick them up, Shouto finally asked, “Is something bothering you?” 

Bakugou let out a gruff “nah”.

That was a lie and Shouto could smell from a mile away. He frowned at Bakugou in deep thought. However, before he could ask another question, Preeta’s yellow car drove into the pickup stop. Hesitantly, Shouto dropped the subject when he and Bakugou got in the car and Preeta greeted them with a wide, sunny smile. "Are you ready for Day 1 of hero-ing Singaporean style?"

Shouto nodded nervously while Bakugou let out a hum that wasn't quite in assent or disagreement. 

"Tough crowd," she huffed out, curling her fingers around the steering wheel. "No worries. You're gonna have a blast at my office, I assure you."

As they travelled, the supervisor gave a quick rundown of what interning under her would entail. Preeta and Co. Hero Offices was located on an entire floor in one of the many office buildings in the central business district. Preeta explained, "We mostly deal with combat situations within that area. It's a hotspot for villains that really want to wreck things big time."

As they drove into the district, Shouto spotted countless skyscrapers and interesting sculptures around. He had heard that there were many important expensive buildings in the area so property damage was apparently a big deal as well. He was slightly worried by this. If there was one thing about their fighting styles that Shouto could call a similarity, it might possibly be the destruction. He and Bakugou didn't exactly have the best track record for keeping fights in their lanes after all.

Soon, Preeta parked in the underground carpark of a fairly unremarkable office building and took a lift from the car park up to the office. As soon as the lift slid open to their destination, they were greeted with a frenzied girl rushing towards them. "Oh my god!" She side-stepped, letting them out. "New interns?" she asked in English, brushing her messy blue hair behind her ear. 

"Yeah," Preeta replied. She glanced at the folders the girl was clutching as she darted into the elevator and slammed her thumb into the button. "Documents for HeroTech again?"

"Yah lah!" she whined, pulling a face of agony. "Who else?" 

Preeta rolled her eyes at the closing lift doors. "That's Charlene by the way. You'll talk to her a lot in the future."

Shouto glanced back at the closed doors. He barely remembered what she looked like already. Sometimes he wished he had better facial recognition skills. Also, Shouto was about 75% certain that was her first name. This felt wildly different from what he is used to… 

Bakugou nudged his back, bringing his attention back to their supervisor, who had already walked past the empty reception desk. She pressed her finger on a scanner to unlock the door that led to an open plan office.

It was chaotic with people discussing things or typing away at their computers. Some of them were in office wear, some in casual clothes, and others in their hero costumes. With a quick glance around the room, Shouto estimated a head count of about 15 other people.

"Attention!" Preeta's voice boomed across the room, capturing the attention of everyone. "We have two new interns, Bakugou Katsuki and Todoroki Shouto from UA, Japan. They'll be with us for three months." She gave them both a look and made a sweeping motion, urging them to introduce themselves. 

Shouto tried his best to articulate himself in the foreign language, "Hello. My name is Todoroki Shouto. I am 17 years old. Um… My quirk is um…" He held his palms up and simultaneously created a flame and a shard of ice. "My hero name is Shouto. Nice to meet you."

Someone started clapping and the others followed suit. Shouto stiffly nodded and pursed his lips.

Next was Bakugou. "I'm Bakugou Katsuki. 18 years old. My quirk is Explosion and my hero name is DynaMight. I'll be the Number One Top Hero."

Shouto narrowed his eyes at him. Did he really need to say that?

Bakugou's eyes made contact with his for a while before he added somewhat reluctantly, "Nice to meet you."

His greeting was also met with an applause and a short hoot. Meanwhile, Preeta grinned at him and said, "Someone's got more guts than I thought! I like that!" She glanced around the room and said, "Everyone except Charlene is here."

Someone from the corner confirmed that statement. 

"Ok! Good! Saves time!" she said, clapping her hands together. "Introduce yourselves as well!"

One by one, the others introduced themselves with their names, positions, and their quirks. Some added special information about themselves and cracked a few jokes that garnered some chuckles in the office. However, between trying to get used to English comprehension, the unusual names and many different information, Shouto's head was swirling. Names and faces seemed to seep out of his brain as the introductions continued.

By the time Preeta smiled down at the two new interns and suggested introducing them to the office facilities, Shouto had already forgotten everyone's names. 

Still, he silently followed Preeta as she told them where the pantry, toilets, sick bay, function rooms and her private office were. Then, they walked around the already chattering employees to a steel door behind the large table. There was another fingerprint scanner that Preeta used. "We'll have to get your prints later. This stuff is just a safety precaution. Hero work can get pretty sensitive. Plus, we have expensive equipment." She swung open the door to the most spacious room yet – the training gym. 

With its light blue walls, the room looked more vibrant than the rest of the office. Natural light also streamed in from its wide windows, which displayed a view of the city skyline, like a reminder of why they do their work. The equipment, while not as grand as Endeavor Hero Agency’s, was still not to be sneezed at, from its high-tech temperature-regulators to an obstacle course with elements customisable to one’s training needs. There was a large first-aid kit and defibrillator beside the benches and a fire extinguisher fixed upon each corner of the room. 

"This is where you will likely begin and end your day. Warm-up in the morning, and self-training in the evening." Preeta smiled as she pointed to a door with her thumb. "The lockers are just over there. Now, get into hero mode, chop chop! I want to see what the two of you can offer on the field."

***

There was a wide grin on Preeta's face when the boys were done showcasing what they could do. "Not bad! Not bad at all!" she said, clapping her hands in appreciation. "We will be working together just fine, I think."

"How about you show us what you've got?" Bakugou said, crossing his arms. He lifted an eyebrow at her challengingly. "Would like to see how *you* fare on the field."

Of course, Bakugou would do something abrasive at some point. Truthfully, however, Shouto would say he was expecting this side of Bakugou to show much earlier. Perhaps that was a testament to what a strange mood Bakugou has been in since this morning.

Luckily, Preeta didn't seem to take any offense in his tone. She just threw her head back and laughed boisterously. "Of course!" she said. She pulled her hair back and her nimble fingers secured the dark red locks in a tight bun. With her originally mid-back length hair tied up, Shouto could see an intriguing feature of her costume. 

It was already fairly interesting when she first stepped out from the locker room, changed into her hero attire. Despite her extremely colourful casual outfits, her hero costume was entirely black. She wore black boots, a black jacket, a black pair of pants, and a black undershirt. The only thing that stood out at first were the big black bracelets that resembled Uraraka's. On her back was a metal fixture with six cylindrical tubes sticking out behind her, and behind those tubes was her bare brown skin. 

Shouto found this all very curious. This costume must have been designed like this to serve a purpose… but what was it?

As though she read his mind, Preeta said, "How about a little quiz for you two?" She stabbed her hair with several more bobby pins. "Take a guess what my quirk is exactly."

Bakugou made no reaction and Shouto just nodded quietly. 

Taking in a deep breath, Preeta swung her arms. Then, she spread them out and leapt to the air. There was a gust of hot air that pushed Shouto and Bakugou back slightly.

They straightened back up to see Preeta shooting upwards like a rocket. Her muscled arms swung forward to grab a slab of metal that hung from above. As soon as she made contact with it, the metal bent to fit the shape of her hands, glowing red-hot. With the momentum, she swung forward and landed with a roll on a lower hanging platform. The spot on the metal that she had grabbed had the marks of her fingers and no longer looked molten. Shouto's eyes widened in intrigue and Bakugou let out a short hum.

Preeta was on her feet before their focus could return to her and, when they did, she was bounding to the other end of the suspended platform. She grabbed a wooden block from a stack at the side and drew her hand back.

The wood burst into flames and she hurled it across the gym, and accurately into a pail of water. Nodding, she leapt off the platform and grabbed onto a pole near the walls and slid down quickly with one arm. 

When she was on the floor again, she flashed the two a grin. "That's the gist of what I can do. My abilities are most practical in a real-life scenario to be honest. So," she folded her hands in front of her chest, "take a guess what my quirk is."

"It's heat-related," Shouto mumbled to himself.

"That's a given in my office."

Meanwhile, Bakugou narrowed his eyes. "Is…"

Shouto's eyes followed his gaze to the coated metal pole. He frowned. There were water droplets forming upon it. He took a step closer to it and placed his hand on the pole. "It's cold." Shouto's eyes widened. "Is it like mine?"

"No, not really. I can't just create fire and ice like you."

Bakugou grinned triumphantly. "So it's some heat transfer thing."

"Impressive," Preeta commended. "What else can you tell me about my quirk then?"

"It relies on contact?" Shouto suggested.

"Yes, and...?" 

Shouto frowned in thought, as did Bakugou. Bakugou hazard a guess, "Do you store the heat in your body?"

"Nope," she said. "It's all stored in these babies." She tapped the cylindrical bracelets on her wrists against each other. "Insulate against the external climate but in direct contact with my skin."

Curious, Shouto asked, "But how did you shoot through the air?"

"Rapid gas expansion in the cylindrical structures on my back," Preeta explained.

Wide-eyed, Shouto nodded. Bakugou's air of skepticism was also lifted as he looked at Preeta in silent admiration. 

"You two are pretty impressive, I must say," Preeta said. "UA really is UA, huh?"

“Preetaaa!” someone interrupted with a sing-song voice. A familiar blue-haired lady popped in. 

Shouto was mildly surprised to find himself recognising her as Charlene from the elevator. 

Looking towards the entrance, Preeta shouted back, "Yah?"

“Your darling is here!”

Preeta turned to goo as she laughed nervously. "Oh my god," she said. "I just– Well, you two–" She buried her face in her hands for a second as she let out a groan. "Just… stay here. I'll be right back." She made a beeline for the exit and stopped in her tracks right outside the gym. Her face broke into a smile. Preeta's hands were even more animated than before as she began to talk to a rather plump lady just beyond the entrance. The lady's back was towards them but Shouto could spot her handing a small tin box to Preeta, who smiled apologetically. It looked like a bento.

Shouto found his eyes sliding towards Bakugou. “What are they saying?” he asked as he peered towards Charlene.

“Harh? How the hell would I know?”

“Aren’t you always eavesdropping others’ conversations?”

Sighing, Bakugou shot him a glare. “Don’t say that as if I hear your stupid-ass conversations on purpose.”

“Do you not?” he teased.

Bakugou shoved him. “Die, asshole,” he said, rolling his eyes. The exasperated fondness did not escape Shouto's notice.

“Hey, hey,” Charlene interrupted. “I may not understand Japanese but I know fighting when I hear it.”

“Ah,” Shouto replied in English, as he raised his hand up in refutation. “It’s okay. That’s… um… just the way he usually is.”

Bakugou jabbed Shouto’s side harshly, drawing a yelp out of him. “You’re un-fucking-believable."

“Are your interns arguing already? On the first day?” the lady Preeta was speaking to said as she spun around to look at the commotion.

Shouto froze.

The skin of her face had a familiar leathery and discoloured quality to it. Her face was of a darker shade compared to the rest of her body, which was pale. And Shouto found his fingers tracing the scar on his own face.

Those were burn scars. But unlike his, it stretched over her entire face.

“They’re not fighting, they said,” Charlene replied, pulling Shouto back from his dazed state.

“I hope not." Preeta peered back into the gym. When it didn't seem like they were ready to murder each other, she said, "Love, do you want to meet the new interns?"

The scarred woman exclaimed, “Okay!" She walked swiftly into the gym in her high heels, Preeta following close behind. “I’m Kaiqi. Preeta’s girlfriend.”

Bakugou stepped in front of Shouto, hands nonchalantly in his pockets. “I’m Bakugou Katsuki. And he is Todoroki Shouto. We’re both from UA in Japan.”

"Nice to meet the both of you. I hope you'll have an amazing time in Singapore. Even though it's an internship, I think it'd be good to have some fun," she said. 

Now that she was closer, Shouto could see the burn scars better now. Such as the way her smile was a little lopsided from the odd swelling in her face. She didn't have any eyebrows or eyelashes either. 

The only burn victims Shouto knew were himself and his father. However, while both of their scars were on their face, neither of them had burns as severe as hers, and not over as large an area. He couldn't help but wonder: how did she get those burn scars?

Preeta’s face twisted as though her foot had been stepped on. At that, Kaiqi rested her hand on her girlfriend’s elbow and asked, “What did he say?”

That was when Shouto realised he had spoken aloud. He blinked in shock. Bakugou spun around, staring, and mouthed, "Idiot."

It looked like pulling teeth as Preeta translated what he said into English.

Shouto felt a surge of shame as he apologised for the question. 

"It's fine," Kaiqi said, waving her hand. "I get asked about it quite often anyway. It was during a scuffle with a small-time criminal I was chasing after. He overloaded my quirk, which stores heat in my hair, and just caused it to catch fire."

"You're a hero?" Shouto asked.

Laughing, she said, "Used to be but not anymore. I've essentially lost my quirk." She pulled her bangs up to reveal that it was a wig.

His eyes widened. "Oh. I-I'm sorry."

"It's alright, really. You learn to live with things, right?" she said, directing a kind smile at Shouto. "It's been more than 10 years now so I'm fine!" She flexed her arm with a grin.

The dark look on Preeta's face, however, said otherwise. But Shouto dared not press this any further.

***

The rest of the day was taxing. Between figuring out their patrol route, struggling with names, and fumbling through hero equipment, Shouto was drained by the end of the day.

It really didn't help though that the mood had seemingly soured. Preeta wasn't as bright and bubbly as she was in the morning. That wasn't to say that she was gloomy because she still tried her best to ensure the atmosphere was never too heavy. But it was clear something was weighing upon her, and it obviously had to do with whatever happened during Kaiqi's quick visit.

That, however, wasn't the most frustrating part; it was Bakugou's sour mood. He was a little grumpy in the morning, and then it got better with time, even joking around in the gym. Yet, suddenly, he was brooding again, and Shouto hadn't a clue what he should do.

Even as the day ended and Preeta sent them back to the dormitories, Shouto still couldn't figure out what had gotten him in this mood or what he should do.

Discreetly, he slid his phone out of his pocket and texted the first person he could think of for help. He was waiting for a reply when the car pulled over.

"Alright! We're here!" Preeta said, smiling back at them. "Rest up. It's been a tiring day but we've got more to do tomorrow!"

Bakugou hummed in acknowledgement as he got out of the car.

"Thank you for today," Shouto said as he slid out after Bakugou.

"No problem!" Preeta returned. "Goodbye, kids!"

The two boys waved before closing the car door and watching it drive off. When Shouto turned around, Bakugou was already walking back into the dorm compounds. 

Shouto was about to follow after when he felt a vibration in his pocket. He took a look at his phone.

Izuku: good morning!!! (Or evening?)

Izuku: but oh no that doesn't sound good :(

Izuku: i honestly think u should talk to kacchan properly

Izuku: leaving kacchan with his thoughts isnt exactly the best idea 

Izuku: maybe talk to him 

Shouto: … I think you're right

Izuku: (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

Shouto nodded to himself. Izuku had experienced first-hand what it was like to deal with a Bakugou who has been left with his own negative thoughts for too long. So Shouto trusted his friend's advice on this topic. He was about to put his phone away when another message came in.

Izuku: its really nice that u r his boyfriend now! i think sometimes he forgets its okay to ask for help and that he doesnt need to deal with stuff alone. plus i can tell he listens to what u say

Izuku: love really changes a person hehe

Izuku: not in a bad way!!

It was as though a lead ball was launched straight at Shouto's stomach. 

There was still the issue that he had to confess that he didn't reciprocate Bakugou's romantic love for him. The day had been so hectic and he had forgotten all about that.

And this conversation with Izuku drove home another problem: when he and Bakugou do break up, how would he explain to his family and Izuku that the relationship they had been overjoyed about not too long ago had just ended?

Shouto felt his lip begin to tremble. He wouldn't know how to face them to be honest. It seems like such a jerk move to have dated someone for more than half a year, only to tell them that he didn't feel any romantic love.

Wouldn't it have been much simpler if he had said that he didn't feel anything romantic for Bakugou from the start? Either they don't start dating or they enter the relationship knowing exactly what they were both in for. Not this… unstable form of a relationship.

What Bakugou needed was something firm he could lean on. Not this… mess of a person who fumbled around with his feelings like an idiot. 

"Oi."

Shouto's head shot up to find red orbs staring into him. 

"You coming?"

"Y-yeah," Shouto muttered, climbing the flight of stairs to the boyfriend whom he simultaneously wanted to embrace and tear himself away from.

[shapes-den]

Art Prompt Competition Entry

(I had to cut down my submission for the WD competition, by a lot, to match the maximum word count, but I thought I'd post the longer version (that's been spell-checked, haha) for anyone who wanted to read it. I had a lot of fun writing it, and I'm enjoying going through everyone else's submission so far!

Content warning for: Hallucinations/visions, themes of death and mortality, body horror, animal death, mind-altering substances, blood, other horror themes)

.

.

“My name is Bu’ha.”

 “Bu’ha?” Ourkan squinted. “I can’t see you to tell if the name fits.”

“How rude of me, elder.” She stepped forward to allow the old wolf to sniff her.

“A yearling?”

“Yes, I’m a trainee healer, my parents suggested I go on this journey to gain confidence in myself.”

Ourkan huffed. “You seem old for a yearling.”

“Well…” Bu’ha paused, laughing nervously. “I was planning to get over my fear of corpses first.”

Ourkan laughed. “A wolf afraid of food? Well, I won’t ask the real reason.”

“It sounds stupid, but it’s true.”

“Strange.”

“Yes, that’s what I’m doing this for. Mother says I should gain enough life experience that silly things like that won’t upset me”.”

“I’m tired,” Ourkan cut her off, slowly stretched out his front paws and scratched at his ear, looking pained, “You should go find my grandson. Big red wolf, you can’t miss him.” He turned away and curled up, tucking his nose under his tail tip. Ignoring her.

"Goodbye... Elder."

----------------------------

Bu’ha plodded up the winding path she had found just past the rude elder's resting spot. Perhaps this pack might help her get over her embarrassing phobia? Ever since she was small the thought of death and dying had terrified her. She even sympathised with the prey her pack caught, apologising before eating, but her mother said this was a good quality in a healer. Compassion. Just… maybe not this much. Catching her own food had already driven home the message, the necessity of prey death, but she simply couldn’t rationalise predator death. They fed no one. It seemed so... senseless.

Sniffing out the presence of other wolves, Bu'ha picked up the pace. Ferns, damp from the mid-morning rain, grabbed at her forelimbs as she brushed past them. Chalky-smelling rocks crumbled into a slurry beneath her toes, but she didn't mind, her thoughts were focused on the two wolf pups who were passed out on a bed of sweet-smelling herbs ahead of her, blocking the path.

Smiling to herself, Bu'ha nosed the closest pup, but the smile soon turned to a deep frown. These poor pups were freezing in the cold autumn wind! Angrily she looked around for either parent, before realising that the pups hadn’t moved an inch.

An icy feeling went down her spine. Could they be…?

“What are you doing?!” Her thought was interrupted by the harsh bark of a middle-aged female. “Get away from my nephews!”

“They’re… alive?”

“What a rude, unobservant yearling! My sister’s twins are just sleeping. They happen to have been born with gifts that make them tired.”

Bu’ha took another look, feeling foolish as she saw that both pups were breathing deeply. How could she be so stupid? The two wolves were joined at the hip. Every healer knew that unusual puppies like that were often colder than normal wolves. It was their connection to dead things that made them that way. That same connection meant that they didn’t live long, and she had just been the most ignorant she could possibly have been. Not a great first impression.

“I’m so terribly sorry, your healer and their parents must be amazing at caring for them. Your nephews seem very happy and healthy.”

“Of course, our healer’s the best in the valley!” She said, with a cunning glint in her eye. “In fact, you should go and see her, perhaps you might learn a thing or two about etiquette.”

“Oh! I would love to; I’m planning to be a healer.” Bu’ha wagged her tail, happy to have found an excuse to leave. Meeting the medicine wolf would be a bonus to her learning too. 

----------------------------------

The pup’s aunt had given her very precise directions, seeming to enjoy making her stay and listen for an uncomfortably long time. It served her right though; she had disrespected the poor female’s family members. Bu’ha took a deep breath as she picked her way delicately through puddles and sharp rocks at her feet. It was slow going, but it gave her time to think about her manners at least.

The air was getting colder, but through the damp and moss, she could smell that the healer was close. Herbs and poultices had a distinct leafy smell, that seemed almost bitter to her, and she could've recognised it from a mile away.

Trailing plants hung down over a rocky cliffside at the end of the temporary stream, but there seemed to be no wolf or den in sight. She put her nose to the floor, hoping to pick up a scent, but all she could smell were puddles and an odd metallic tang that made her gag. Probably some rare type of medicine or plant, not that it made the stench of it any less disgusting. Maybe there would be a path on the cliff somewhere? Bu’ha stepped forward and nosed at the sodden, dripping vines. The revolting scent was stronger here, but so was a much sweeter smell of dried flowers, that seemed to be carried on a breeze blowing out of the rock itself. Of course! The medicine wolf must have a den hidden behind the plants. How clever, she thought, to keep any sick wolves where they would be undisturbed. Good for recovery. Now if only she could remember what the healer’s name was…

“Hello?” she whined, “Is a wolf name Huth here? Your packmate Auru sent me.”

A nose suddenly touched her own, causing her to jump at least 10 feet into the air in surprise.

“A visitor!” said the greying muzzle poking out from behind the curtain of greenery, “I never get visitors, come in!” Just as quickly as the nose had appeared, it vanished again, back into whatever cave or crevice it's owner lived in.

“Do… Don’t you want to know why I’m here?” Bu’ha asked, both curious and confused.

“Of course not! It’ll be obvious enough when you get in here, hurry up!”

The yearling laughed, it seemed like learning from this wolf might be fun. Thank goodness this pack’s healer wasn’t as abrasive as the rest of them. She pushed her way eagerly into the cave, taking in her surroundings as her eyes adjusted to the dim light.

An elderly wolf with large patches of fur missing here and there, greeted her with a wagging tail.

“Don’t worry, I’m not contagious if you were wondering,” The old wolf sized her up, almost jealously despite her warm smile “As we get older, healing comes much slower.”

“Oh, of course, I didn’t mean to stare.” This wolf, Huth, was clearly old enough to be envious of the yearling’s youth, but she sounded friendly, and all those years of wisdom would be fascinating to hear about.

Bu’ha fluffed out her fur, not wanting to appear judgemental. Old wolves aren’t dead wolves, she thought to herself, though, she didn’t really believe it looking at Huth.

“You look half-starved. Did my cranky relatives bother to feed you?”

“No, but I- “

The older wolf cut her off by shoving a chunk off meat under her nose.

“Eat up!” She said cheerfully, not pausing for a response.

“… Thank you.” Bu’ha sighed, knowing she couldn’t refuse the hospitality of a shared meal, and whispered a quick apology to the unidentified creature she was eating.

“Custom of your pack?” Huth enquired. The elder was sharp, she hadn’t missed Bu’ha’s quirk. Should she lie? “No, you seem touchy about it. Don’t worry, I won’t judge you. Spirits aren’t just superstition, you know.”

“Oh?”

“I can show you, after your meal. Spirits make the herbs more potent, full of nutrition. Good for growing wolves.” The elder gave her a kind, almost pitying look.

----------------------------------

Both wolves padded softly over snow. Mist rose from the surroundings, but Huth had told Bu’ha this was the magic of the place. Tall, slender trees were silhouetted against the early evening light, in an eerily beautiful way. Bu’ha was enjoying herself, she had already learned a few things, and the air was cool and pleasant to her nose.

“How do you feel?” Huth asked softly.

“Hm? Cold, mostly.”

“Good… Good. Tell me when you can see it.”

The young wolf tilted her head, looking around. Now that she mentioned it, the trees seemed to be swaying in time with her breath, each exhale blowing condensation into the still air. The ground was breathing with her, glistening dewdrops shining with life.

“Do… You mean… spirits?” For some reason her words were slow to reach her mouth. Each step was becoming harder, and yet Huth seemed unaffected by the energy of the forest.

“Shh, shh, you tell me when you see. Tell me what it says.”

“Huuuth…?” Bu’ha felt nauseous, her blood rushed in her ears. Everything felt darker than before. The tree (… were they trees?) moved with greater intensity, with purpose. “What…?”

Black blood dripped down blacker bark, each tree a twisted limb that uprooted itself to crash forwards towards her. Moss melted and bubbled underfoot. Howls of air almost knocked her down as she cowered before a mighty beast. Ragged breaths, bright dead eyes, its ribcage heaved as hers did, sucking the air from her lungs and forcing it back down her throat with no care for her mortal whims.

Each inhale brought a wave of sickness; each brought a tide of death. Small critters curled up and died before her, plants withered and rotted to nothing. All consumed by the black, black blood.

That corpse-like, canine face, an emaciated grimace that pulsated with an air of indifference. Urine soaked into her tucked tail. The slender spirit did not care.

“Tell me what it says!” Her vision was blocked as Huth let out a ragged screech. “I need to know what to do!”

Bu’ha stared up in fear at the mess of flesh that was the older wolf. Every inch of Huth's muzzle throbbed with open yellow pustules, bubbling like molten fat, barely clinging to her rotting bones. Her jaw hung loosely, teeth gnashing at nothing as strangled sounds of desperation left her throat. Her eyes were no more. Instead, her sockets poured forth dark, sticky liquid, that fell down her cheeks and hit the ground with a sickening squelch. Her cries were getting louder. Her head was twitching violently. One paw held Bu’ha pinned to the ground. Her empty sockets remained focused on the yearling.

Not to be ignored, nor constrained by the mere laws of physics, the tall, twisted sprit passed through the medicine wolf, it’s head almost comically small compared to its sinewy neck. Both wolf and spirit blended into one as a strange sense of calm overtook Bu’ha.

How idiotic she had been. Death was inevitable. Death did not care. Death was not…

Her vision faded into

nothingness.

-----------------------------------

Pitiful.

Useless.

Pathetic.

Huth kicked her back legs with each contemptuous thought. What a waste of time. The twisted corpse behind her had showed such promise, and yet…

“Too much mountain toad?” She pondered. What a moron. If only she hadn’t been so focused on the approaching winter, she wouldn’t have messed things up for the twins. Might even have cured them before the snow drifts got too deep.

The old wolf’s muscles ached as she bitterly kicked a clump of large icy earth at the yearling.

“Help…” A soft whine came from behind Huth... had she imagined it? Excitement overtook rationality as she turned sharply towards the ‘corpse’. There! Shallow breaths, despite the lifeless eyes.

“Perfect!”

Perhaps she wasn't so useless after all.

[upsidedowninmyworld]

All of them? :$

I can’t sleep. Why not

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? The height I am now

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) Hmm...Gizmo

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? Anything comfortable really

4: What was your favorite video game growing up? Sonic

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: My partner, my future, and what it all holds

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? Very quiet, slow to anger but proceed with caution

7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]? 🤷🏻‍♀️

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] uhh when I took this test in high school, I was melancholic

9: Are you ticklish? Yes

10: Are you allergic to anything? Loads

11: What’s your sexuality? Bisexual

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? Cocoa

13: Are you a cat or dog person? Cat

14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? Hmm vampire

15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? I did

16: How tall are you? 5’2”

17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? I like mine

18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] too much for me to be comfortable

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? Yes

20: Do you like space or the ocean more? Uhh I like both equally

21: Are you religious? Kind of

22: Pet peeves? When people touch my stuff without asking. Bad breath

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? Nocturnal

24: Favorite constellation? Not sure

25: Favorite star? Not sure

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? No?

27: Any phobias or fears? Not saying

28: Do you think global warming is real? Yes

29: Do you believe in reincarnation? Not really

30: Favorite movie? Forrest Gump

31: Do you get scared easily? No lol

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime? 5?

33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.] what?

34: What is a color that calms you? Blue

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? Australia, London

36: Where were you born? LA

37: What is your eye color? Brown

38: Introvert or extrovert? Intro

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? No lol

40: Hugs or kisses? Kisses

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? Cody

42: Who is someone you love deeply? Cody

43: Any piercings you want? Second ear piercings

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? Yes

45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? Before

46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! He’s pretty great. Been with them for almost 4 years :)

47: What is a sound you really hate? A certain person’s voice

48: A sound you really love? The ocean

49: Can you do a backflip? Not anymore

50: Can you do the splits? If I stretch, yes

51: Favorite actor and/or actress? Natalie Dorner and Ed skrein atm

52: Favorite movie? I already answers this

53: How are you feeling right now? Tired

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? Half white half Black

55: When did you feel happiest? I think it’s been a while

56: Something that calms you down? Writing or drawing

57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] nothing diagnosed

58: What does your URL mean? My world is odd

59: What three words describe you the most? Quiet, contemplative weird

60: Do you believe in evolution? Yes

61: What makes you unfollow a blog? Posting things I don’t like

62: What makes you follow a blog? Posting things I like

63: Favorite kind of person: a genuinely nice person that is honest

64: Favorite animal(s): pandas, otters

65: Name three of your favorite blogs. 🤷🏻‍♀️

66: Favorite emoticon: 😻

67: Favorite meme: I have too many

68: What is your MBTI personality type? I can’t remember

69: What is your star sign? Uhhh Pisces...?

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? Yes

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? A black shirt and jeans with converse

72: Post a selfie or two? No thank you

73: Do you have platform shoes? I do!

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? I can bend my thumb all the way to my arm

75: Can you do a front flip? Not anymore

76: Do you like birds? Sure

77: Do you like to swim? Love it

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? Swimming for sure

79: Something you wish didn’t exist: not saying

80: Some thing you wish did exist: someone that is no longer here

81: Piercings you have? Just my ears for now

82: Something you really enjoy doing: reading

83: Favorite person to talk to: Cody

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? I like this site

85: How many followers do you have? Uhh I haven’t looked in a while

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? I use. To lol

87: Do your socks always match? Yes

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? Yes

89: What are your birthstones? Aquamarine

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? Panda or a cat

91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? A rose

92: A store you hate? Hmmm not sure

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? I don’t

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? Read minds

95: Do you like to wear camo? On occasion

96: Winter or summer? Winter

97: How long can you hold your breath for? About 30-45 seconds

98: Least favorite person? HAHA

99: Someone you look up to: my dad

100: A store you love? Any bookstore lol

101: Favorite type of shoes. Converse

102: Where do you live? In LA

103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? Nope

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? I don’t have one?

105: Do you drink milk? Yes

106: Do you like bugs? No

107: Do you like spiders? Yes

108: Something you get paranoid about? The future

109: Can you draw: kind of

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? How sex was with a person I slept with or how I could stand sleeping next to ex because he snores really loudly. Like freight train loud

111: A question you hate being asked? Who’s the smarter or prettier twin. I usually get that I’m smarter

112: Ever been bitten by a spider? Yes

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? I do

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? Cloudy

115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: codes

116: Favorite cloud type: what

117: What color do you wish the sky was? Purple

118: Do you have freckles? No

119: Favorite thing about a person: clean hands

120: Fruits or vegetables? Fruits

121: Something you want to do right now: see someone

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? Ocean

123: Sweet or sour foods? Sour

124: Bright or dim lights? Bright

125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? Sure

126: Something you hate about Tumblr: 🤷🏻‍♀️

127: Something you love about Tumblr: 🤷🏻‍♀️

128: What do you think about the least? Work

129: What would you want written on your tombstone? 🤷🏻‍♀️

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? HA

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? My mind

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? Yes

133: Computer or TV? Computer

134: Do you like roller coasters? Yes

135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? It depends

136: Are your ears lobed or attached? Attached

137: Do you believe in karma? Sure

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? Like an 8 on a good day

139: What nicknames do you have/have had? Quite a few

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? Yes

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? Yes

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? Good

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? Both

144: What makes you angry. A lot

145: How many languages do you speak fluently? One

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? I’m bi soooo

147: Are you androgynous? No

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: my butt lol

149: Favorite thing about your personality: my ability to see the good in everyone even when they’re shitty. Also my least favorite thing about myself

150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. Well my dad, Cody, my grandma

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? The one rn because I am a minority

152: Do you like BuzzFeed? Sure

153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.] uhh dating app. Technically a football game.

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? No

155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? Just codys

156: What embarrasses you? Not a lot

157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: the future because I can’t really talk about it with anyone without stressing people out. But it helps me feel less anxious so I’m kind of stuck

158: Biggest lie you have ever told: oof

159: How many people are you following? 🤷🏻‍♀️

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? 🤷🏻‍♀️

161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?🤷🏻‍♀️

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?🤷🏻‍♀️

163: Last time you cried and why: ooh like a few days ago

164: Do you have long or short hair? Short

165: Longest your hair has ever been: to my butt

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon? I don’t want to answer this

167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? Yes

168: Do you like to wear makeup? Yes

169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? No

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? Yes

[whatissleepeven]

Devildom's Spooks and Scares (Obey Me!)

For my wife @sevensins-stuff because we both share the same fear 😌💕💖💞💖💕💞

*This fic contains her mc Aqua and my mc Musashi. Both of their pronouns are she/her, so read at your own discretion!*

(And can someone show me how to do the "read more" option because I for the life of me have no idea how to do it and this post is LONG)

-------------------------------------------------

Lucifer placed a hand on Musashi's shoulder, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Are you ready?"

Musashi glanced up at him before sweeping her gaze over the other brothers, Barbatos holding the way to the other side open. This would mark the first time they were going to visit Aqua's universe, and needless to say they were all looking forward to being with her and the brothers' counterparts again.

She smiled. "Of course I am!"

She was stoked to finally talk to Aqua in person rather than over text all the time. A few weeks had passed since their fateful encounter, and it was a hassle to see when their schedules lined up so they could go visit.

The eldest brother removed his hand with a small smile of his own, nodding towards the open door. There was a myriad of colors swirling in its maw, but they all had confidence that it would lead them to the right place.

"Then let's go."

Once they landed on the other side, they looked up at the House of Lamentation. Much like when they met Aqua's group, they were situated near the front door.

"Well, what're we waiting for?!" Mammon said, marching up and (to his credit) knocking on the door.

He only got two knocks in before the door swung open, Aqua's wide smile being the first thing to greet them.

"You're here!!"

Musashi brightened at her appearance, taking a running start and tackling her into a hug. "Aqua!!"

Aqua stumbled back from the force of her hug, laughing at her energy as, this time, she didn't hesitate to hug back. "Long time no see, Musashi!"

Musashi's version of the demon brothers entered from behind, most looking on in amusement at the two humans before seeking their respective counterpart. It was surreal that they were all gathered again (and in such short time to boot), and quickly the House of Lamentation filled with laughter and shrieks (courtesy of the Levis, who found out that they had enough power to defeat a difficult boss level in one of their games).

"How have you been?!" Musashi asked Aqua excitedly, releasing her from the hug.

The taller human smiled at her energy, giving her a pat on the head. "Oh, you know...about as well as a human can do in a house full of demons."

Musashi laughed as Aqua's face scrunched up, the latter no doubt thinking about something one (or more) of the brothers had done recently. "That bad, huh?"

"...You could say..." Aqua answered cryptically, which caused Musashi to burst out laughing again.

She wiped a stray tear from her eye, giving Aqua a side hug. "I've missed you."

The way Aqua's eyes twinkled let her know that she felt the same. "I need a sane person in my life right now."

Musashi linked their arms together. "Unfortunately, I don't think either of us are "sane" either, but hey; at least we're staying the night!"

Aqua's answering laugh warmed her heart, and the two retreated to her room to catch up. They found that it was indeed Solomom who had brought them back, and even shared their similarities with the Golden Hellfire Newt Syrup Fiasco.

"Did you kiss Lucifer?" Musashi teased, lightly pushing Aqua's arm. She was privy to all the late night conversations about how her own Lucifer was hot, and how Musashi's Lucifer was subjected to her endless teasing due to his height. Musashi found it incredibly endearing and cute, so sometimes she asked her own Lucifer what he thought about Aqua.

Lucifer's brows furrowed, a scowl setting on his face as he stared into the distance. "There is nothing to talk about," he'd say, but Musashi knew better as she saw a tiny of red to his cheeks.

"Mm-hm, okay. Thanks Lucifer!"

"What does that mea- hey, no running in the halls!"

Judging by the light flush on Aqua's cheeks, she had hit the nail right on the head. "Don't ask questions you already know the answer to, goofball."

Musashi grinned, proceeding to make kissy noises like a five year-old to further embarrass her friend. "Aqua and Lucifer, sittin' in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N- "

Aqua pushed her shoulder, her body shaking with laughter. "Shut up you dork! How about you and a certain white-haired demon, hmm?"

Musashi's mouth clamped shut, red spilling onto her cheeks. She forgot that she in turn told her about her (hopeless) crush on Mammon one fateful night, her sleep-deprived brain turning wax poetic as she gushed about his eyes or the rare, bright smiles he sent her way.

She averted her gaze, sweat rolling down her cheek. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Aqua's smirk was piercing. "Did you two kiss, or no?"

Musashi buried her face into her hands, letting out a noise of embarrassment. "I-I could never, you know that! I'd just be taking advantage of him...I hugged him instead."

She didn't mention how warm and soft Mammon's hug was, nor how she practically melted into his hold as she hugged him back just as tightly. She also didn't mention how she couldn't muster up the courage to even ask him for another hug, but the amusement in Aqua's eyes let her know that she was in the process of coming to that conclusion.

She opened her mouth to tease some more, but a brief knock on the door followed by Satan's head poking in interrupted her.

"Dinner's ready, you two." The blonde said in an amused tone. A shorter Satan also peeked into the room, gesturing for them to get up.

"Hurry and grab your plates before the Beels eat it all."

Aqua and Musashi shared a glance before they were running out of the room, the Satans barely having time to get out of the way.

"Last one there's a rotten egg!"

"Wh- hey, you've got longer legs than me!"

-------------------------------------------------

Dinner was, as always, loud but peaceful. There was more of a surplus of food than usual due to there being two Beels, the Belphies sliding some food onto their plates whenever they caught them looking at someone else's food (read: the Levis'). It got a little hectic once both Lucifers reached for the same piece of food, their staring contest masking the clash of wills that Musashi could've sworn caused electricity to spark between them.

"Hm? Mammon, what's that?"

Asmo's questioning voice had them turning to the demon in question, who was polishing a bottle as Musashi's Mammon looked on with intense focus. He pointed out if the other missed a spot, and Musashi marvelled at how efficient their team up already was. Isn't this only the second time they met in person?

"I bought this at a shop not too long ago, and I plan on sellin' it for a higher price on Akuzon." He explained, wiping the cloth over the smooth surface of the object. "I jus' gotta polish it a bit, is all."

Aqua's Satan hummed, eyeing the vase with a troubled look. "Where have I seen that case before...?"

"Ah! Gotta clean the inside, too." Aqua's Mammon murmured, faltering once his hands reached the cork. "Why the hell's this on there?"

Aqua's face shifted into one of unease. "Hey, Mammon, maybe you shouldn't - "

"Too late!" He cackled, pulling it off in one go. The lights flashed as seven apparitions flew out of the vase, their chilling laughter shaking Musashi to her core.

Aqua's Satan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Now I remember. That case is home to seven particularly pesky poltergeists. Luckily, we should be able to reseal them again using the vase."

Musashi tensed. Poltergeists...as in ghosts?

She couldn't handle ghosts.

"Haha, that's funny Satan." Aqua's laugh fell short as she rubbed her arms, glancing around the room. Musashi scooted her chair closer to offer her a bit of comfort despite being scared as well.

The taller Satan frowned. "I didn't make a joke?"

Musashi's Lucifer sent a glare at the Mammons, who were already tense enough as it was. "And now they're roaming the House."

The other Lucifer sighed. "In any case, they don't pose a threat. All they pull are small pranks."

"Wh- we're just leavin' em?!" Musashi's Mammon yelped, Aqua's Mammon shifting from foot to foot as he eyed the ceiling warily. Musashi's heart went out to them both; everyone knew about Mammon's fear of ghosts and things that went bump in the night, and they were always teased about it.

"Why not?" Aqua's Asmo shrugged, a smile on his face. Musashi marvelled at how calm he was being; then again, her mind was running at 150 miles per hour and double-checking every corner covered in shadow. "I think they're cute, pulling harmless little pranks. Don't you agree, Aqua?"

Aqua had yet to loosen up, her back straight as she replied in a cautious tone. "Yeah...cute."

Asmo's eyes widened, an amused smile spreading across his face as he connected the dots. "Why, are you - "

Levi stood up from the dining table, the shorter Levi following in tandem. "Well, we're gonna go game. See ya."

Both Belphies stood up as well. "Going to bed sounds nice right about now, so we're leaving. Beel, are you coming?"

The Beels stopped sneaking food from Asmo's plate, nodding. "Yeah. Goodnight, everyone."

One by one (or in this case, two by two), they all dispersed until only the humans and the Lucifers were left.

Aqua's Lucifer nodded at them both. "We'll be retiring to my-...our room as well. Is there anything you'd like to say?"

Musashi felt like laughing, hysteria building in her throat. How was anyone (save for the Mammons and Aqua, who was turning paler by the second) calm about this? Have they not watched The Conjouring? Insidious?

The Exorcist??

"Nope!" She said, voice strained, "All good here! Everything is good in this hood! Happy hunky dory!"

Now both Lucifers were looking at her strangely. Aqua's forced laugh turned their confused gazes to her, the taller human pulling Musashi away.

"Don't mind her, she's just tired. We're gonna go to sleep now too so BYE!!"

Once they made it to Aqua's room, Musashi closed the door behind her and slumped to the floor.

"So...ghosts."

Aqua flopped against her bed, a stressed sigh escaping her that seemed to stem from her very soul.

"...Ghosts."

Musashi worked her way over, resting her back against the bed. "How screwed are we on a scale of one to ten?"

Aqua shifted, turning to face her. Her expression was apprehensive, and she ran her hand through her hair as her brows furrowed. "Try a twenty."

Musashi fiddled with her hands. "...I guess we sleep it off, somehow?"

Aqua's voice came out dry, her humor tumbling straight to the floor. "Ah yes, sleep off the fact that we're going to be experiencing Paranormal Activity in real life."

Musashi was really hoping she wouldn't phrase it like that, but she was right.

There was one thing left to do in a situation like this. It was a fail safe they had come up with over text: Contingency Plan P on Page 117 of their book What To Do In The Event Of A Paranormal Experience.

It was one of the most powerful weapons they had at their disposal, and it worked 98% of the time: It was the foolproof -

"Blanket fort?"

For the first time since Mammon opened the vase, Aqua smiled.

"Blanket fort."

-------------------------------------------------

They didn't mean to fall asleep.

One minute they were talking, and the next thing Musashi knew was that she was being shaken awake by a very distressed individual. She tensed under the touch, the thought of the ghosts had breached their impenetrable blanket wall and were coming to steal their souls and possess them being the only one that ran through her mind as the shaking got rougher. Her fear was made worse by the fact that she didn't have her glasses on, making the world around her out of focus and leaving her mind to fill in the blanks with its imagination.

Her fight or flight instincts kicked in, and the flight won over as she shied away with a primal startled cry. "Aqua!"

She was relieved to see that Aqua was alright, her blurry figure rising up almost immediately as she punched the form closest to her purely on reflex.

A familiar, brash yelp of pain shook them back to their senses. "Ow! Whaddya have to do that for, huh?!"

Aqua's surprised voice answered. "Mammon? What are you doing in here, so late at night?"

Musashi couldn't really see, but Aqua's Mammon suddenly retreated, bashful. "...What if I just wanted to visit ya? I am your first man, after all!"

Aqua leveled him with a stare. "...Uh-huh."

Her Mammon scowled. "Alright, alright, stop givin' me that look! We were sleepin' and out of nowhere, my radio started playing this horrible sound. Ya gotta come see this, 'cause no one else will believe us!"

A hand touched Musashi' shoulder, and she involuntarily flinched. Her Mammon immediately backed away, raising his hands in defense.

"Woah, chill! It's just me, Musashi!"

Musashi forced herself to relax, groping for her glasses. Where were they...? "Yeah...Yeah. I'm sorry for scaring you, Mammon."

He scoffed, crossing his arms. It was too dark for her to see, but there was a blush on his face as he averted his gaze. "The Great Mammon doesn't get scared, ya hear?! And here; you lookin' for this?"

She felt him gently slide her glasses onto her face, causing her to blink as his face became clearer.

She smiled awkwardly, red creeping onto her cheeks. "Thank you."

He leaned back on his heels, tripping over his words. "Y-Yeah, whatever...it was nothin'."

Musashi could practically feel Aqua's amused stare as the other human got to her feet.

"Save it for later, you two. We have to check out the noise."

Musashi made a mental note to get back at her whenever they encountered Lucifer next as she scowled at her. Just wait until Lucifer comes into play. Then, it's no mercy from me.

"C'mon already!" The taller Mammon urged, grabbing an already hesitant Aqua's arm. Musashi could tell that she was trying to put on a brave face for the Mammons, and brushed shoulders with her both to comfort her and herself.

"Cheer up, Aqua! What's the worst that could happen?"

-------------------------------------------------

"OKAY. A LOT OF THINGS. A LOT OF BAD THINGS CAN HAPPEN."

"Less talking, more running!" Aqua snapped at her, the two turning a corner just in time to hear a plate crash where their heads used to be mere moments ago.

The poltergeist chasing them snickered, a hollow sound that was reminiscent to the wheeze of a dying animal. It had popped out of Mammon's stereo and set its sights on the two humans, collecting every object it could levitate and throwing it at them. Musashi could see that Aqua was getting annoyed the longer they ran, but the fear was still on her face as they bobbed and weaved.

The ghost let out a haunting wail. "OooooOoOOHhHH!!"

"Oh fuck off, you Boo Berry looking see through dumpy son of a - " Aqua was cut off as she ran into a solid chest, letting out a small oomph in surprise.

Musashi could've weeped tears of joy upon seeing the two disgruntled Lucifers, clad in pajamas and their hair tousled. Musashi may not be attracted to them, but even she had to admit that they looked hot in casual wear. (Aqua's blush as her eyes widened confirmed that yes, she did in fact agree with her.) "And what exactly are you two doing, running around the House of Lamentation like madmen?"

Aqua backed up immediately, trying for a smirk that unfortunately fell short in the wake of her fear. "Can't we just enjoy a casual run through the house at night?"

Musashi's Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose. She saw him count to ten slowly, trying his damndest to reign in his irritation. "Which is exactly the problem: at night."

Aqua looked around her Lucifer at him. "Ah, sorry about that Luci...I didn't see you there."

The shorter Lucifer tensed as Aqua's raised his eyebrow, giving them both a look of amusement. "As much as I would like to see this play out," the taller one said with some humor seeping into his voice, placing steadying hands on Aqua's shoulders, "That still doesn't answer my question. What is the real reason for this?"

He didn't need to wait for an answer. The poltergeist rounded the corner, hurtling a lamp towards them with an unholy shriek.

Musashi's eyes widened as she saw the path the lamp was taking. "Aqua, look ou- !"

- But Aqua was pulled into her Lucifer's hold, the eldest brother wrapping a protective arm around her as he caught the offending object with ease.

Annoyance seeped into his tone. "...It seems I don't need to look further. You have the vase on you still, yes?"

The other Lucifer stepped forward, vase in hand as he directed the opening at the apparition. There was a scowl of his own on his face, irritation seeping into his frame the longer he looked at the ghost. "It's a good thing I hadn't dropped it off after taking care of the one in our room. Let's take care of this nuisance."

"OooOoOoohhhhH..." The ghost let out a guttural moan as it was sucked back into the vase, the floating objects trailing behind it dropping to the floor with a thud before silence returned to the hallway.

Musashi gaped. "Wh...How did you do that?! That was so cool!"

Her Lucifer preened at the compliment, a small smirk on his face as he set down the vase. "It wasn't too hard; remember, Satan had mentioned earlier that all you need to do is point the vase at them and they immediately return to it."

"So it's like Ghostbusters? That makes it a little bit less horrific!"

He regarded her with another look, Musashi realizing too late what she said. "Are you saying that you were scared of a little poltergeist, Musashi?"

Musashi didn't usually throw her friends under the bus, but she didn't want to be the only one suffering under Lucifer's judging yet amused gaze. "W-Well, I'm not the only one!"

"Musashi!" Aqua hissed at her, no doubt remembering her betrayal for a later date.

Musashi looked around frantically in response, the weight of Aqua's glare growing heavier by the second. "Well would you look at the time, it seems like Beel found one in the kitchen! Let's go, Lucifer! Ghostbusting awaits!"

She tugged on his arm, and he barely managed to secure the vase in their grasp before they were off.

...

It seemed like it was just Aqua and Lucifer in the hallway, now.

Aqua's Lucifer looked down at her, a teasing lilt to his voice as a smirk adorned his features. "Afraid ghosts, are you? I never expected you to be the type."

Aqua scowled, red blossoming on her cheeks as she refused to look at him. "It's not like I wanted you to know about it. I can't help what I'm scared of."

She was too busy looking away to notice how his expression softened at her words, only startling when his hand reached up to brush a lock of hair out of her face.

He leaned in, his breath brushing against her cheek as he whispered in her ear. "I'm merely insinuating that you can get behind me if you are scared."

Oh, he was playing dirty and he knew it. Aqua lightly swatted his arm, her scowl gone as she raised the back of her hand to her mouth in an attempt to cover it. She didn't exactly trust the facial expression she was making right now, and most of all she didn't want her Lucifer to see it. "Asshole."

The insult fell flat due to her shaky voice. A chuckle escaped him as he rested his head against hers, hands moving to brace himself on her shoulders as his lips twitched upwards in poorly concealed mirth.

"I don't hear a no from you."

Aqua snorted, a soft smile forming on her own face as she drank in the sight of a laughing Lucifer. It seemed that he was loosening up more and more around her as of late, and this was an expression she wanted to commit to memory.

"Alright Lucifer, I'll humor you. I'm counting on you protect me from all of the remaining poltergeists in here."

The gentle smile he sent her way nearly made her heart stop.

"I wouldn't dream of anything else."

-------------------------------------------------

"Well, I guess this is it. Again."

Musashi said jovially as she stepped up to Aqua, a bright grin on her face. With the vase in their possession, it hadn't been long before all seven spirits were rounded up and properly sealed inside once more.

To be honest, the highlight of the entire adrenaline-filled night was when they all crashed in the living room, making a blanket for on the floor (per Musashi's and Aqua's request) and falling asleep together.

...At least, it was either that moment or the one where Aqua and her Lucifer had trailed into the kitchen to check up on them shortly after sealing the first ghost, the eldest demon holding her hand in reassurance as she looked like she was going to drop from sheer embarrassment.

"Say nothing," Aqua merely stated the second Musashi opened her mouth with a mischievous twinkle in her mocha orbs, narrowing her eyes at her. "You have no room to talk."

(She really didn't, not with how she had grasped Mammon's hand after a particularly bad scare later on in the night and gave it a squeeze. She couldn't help it; it was a reflex she didn't know she had, and she nearly combusted once he squeezed back.)

"I'll be visiting you next time," Aqua said with a smile, holding her arms out wide.

Musashi sprang into her arms, wrapping her own around the taller woman's waist. She looked up at her, a grin on her face as she heard Aqua laugh at her actions. "Hopefully soon?"

A nod. "Of course! We need to have movie night at your place, remember?"

They reluctantly let go once Musashi's Lucifer called her over, the brothers having already said their goodbyes. She turned to leave, then stopped and threw a heartfelt smile over her shoulder.

"Despite my soul wanting to leave my body on multiple occasions, I had fun this time, too."

Aqua's smile widened as she raised her hand in a wave. "Don't be a stranger!"

Musashi waved back, and before she knew it she was back home.

"I'm going to go sleep off that entire experience," Belphie groaned, dragging his feet towards the entrance of the House of Lamentation.

Satan smiled, glancing behind him at where the portal used to be. "Overall, it was a rather...thrilling experience."

Now it was Asmo's turn to groan, throwing his hands up as he followed the blonde through the door. "Ugh, who let you near the pun books again?"

Levi tapped away at his D.D.D., no doubt texting his counterpart. "This wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for Mammon."

Mammon let out a noise of offense. "What makes ya say that? Oi! Where d'ya think you're going, Levi?!"

Lucifer walked after the two, no doubt going to wring out the location of the vase from Mammon so something similar doesn't happen in their timeline.

Beel also made to go inside, but stopped and turned to her. "Musashi, are you coming? I want to try the homemade brownies you promised to bake once we came back."

"Hm? Oh!" Musashi startled, glancing down at her D.D.D. before pocketing it. "I'm sorry for the wait, Beel! Let's get baking!"

The device showed one sent message to Aqua before it shut off on its own.

Did you kiss Lucifer in the hallway too on top of him practically manhandling you to safety?

[mybodyfails]

hi hi hiii. finally back home from berlin, caught a few zzz’s, still sleep deprived, but i’d do it again in a heartbeat!

i‘m gonna ~try to do bullet points here, but you know me... probably not gonna happen. sorry, you have to deal with my longwinded ramblings now, i‘m posting this mostly to remember it all for myself.

let me preface this with a quick disclaimer, these kind of events are usually not really for me, too awkward, too cringy, i’m shy as fuck and socially incompetent in general... but druck has had such an impact on my life, it was a no-brainer for me to go.

biggest shoutout to @lapalooz (with no access to her real tumblr, get on that!) for making the waiting time not only bearable but enjoyable with her engaging presence! aaand i’m pretty sure i wouldn‘t have made it to the meet&greet (aka hi&cry) if i didn‘t have the amazing @matteounterdruck by my side. thank you tina, so much!!! you really kept my spirits high and taught me how to release nervous energy through dancing! lmao ❤️❤️❤️

okay. let’s start at the beginning. the exhibition of and appreciation for all the fanart was one of my favourite things when we walked into that location. druck really said this show is as much about YOU as it is about US and just how lovely is that???

the q&a wasn‘t as bad as it could‘ve been... i just wish it would have been a bit longer though! they seemingly were prepared for the ‚why did amira‘s season end after 7 eps‘ question, but tua being honest and saying fuck yes, i wanted 10 eps for her too... iconic.

surprise surprise, the two people i truly didn‘t expect to be there were milena and michi. and then they were! and they were whispering to each other a lot <3 and michi was the most adorable awkward person to ever exist. you can tell he really is such a shy and private person, and i think seeing that spelled out right in front of us like this made it all the more special that he showed up at all! the things he ~did say were really witty and charming though, so there‘s that. 💕

the bloopers were so good, it was moving to see how much fun they had on set and that their friendships aren’t contrived in the slightest! all i kept thinking was “i can‘t wait to reblog the gifs of that to my tumblr“ haha. SO WHERE‘S THE VIDEO @DRUCK?!

for someone who went in there expecting to have a complete breakdown i was actually okay...ish when we watched the ep (i was so relieved to finally see amira again!) and david‘s film... until the cast went up on stage during anselm‘s second song and mile was stood there, tears streaming down her face, leaning on lukas for comfort. oi, that broke me. :(

quick shoutout to the person behind me who was crying in the club as they say, no, actually it was full on SOBBING. in my mind i just kept going ~SAME~. and, you know, anselm‘s songs didn‘t help the cause either... what a mess.

now on to the meet&greet. if you’re not interested in the people behind druck, or you think meeting them in person is weird or whatever - then this part is not for you and you’ll want to x out of here right now, please spare me the comments, i‘ve already had enough negativity in this fandom for years to come, whew.

i‘ll put this under a cut, just to be extra sure.

you know, i‘ve grown so attached to these characters over the last 1.5 years and it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to say thanks to the actresses/actors who made them come to life. for real though, i think really looking them in the eyes and saying THANK YOU was the best thing about the whole experience for me.

this‘ll be chaotic, i’m just gonna list everything i remember off the top of my head, please bear with me.

first of all: best. cast. ever! every single one of them was lovely in their own way... some of them are really high energy people (keep in mind we went in reallllly late, they had been doing this for hours at that point!)... think anselm, tua and mile. they just carried everyone else with their energy!

anselm was as warm and welcoming as i expected, yet it still surprised me how confidently he handled the whole situation (unlike me rip)... i literally blurted out “you‘re such a good host!“ to him and he sounded really flattered when thanking me. he just has the best vibes <3

naomi... oh my god. i was really shocked to even see her at all which was only right before it was our turn with her group. she made a little sarcastic remark about how she “can‘t wait to be tagged in alllll the pictures“ lmao. just leave it up to her to make me fall in love in real life too. :(

i don‘t know if they did it in all of their pictures, but her and hassan were hugging it out in the background of ours like the laura/mohammed crackship that they are. loved that! lmao

speaking of hassan though, i only had the BRIEFEST interaction with him bc how does one cope with all that beauty up close?! one doesn‘t, that‘s how. damn.

i lovelovelove that they kept the five girls together for the photo op, now the pictures ended up looking like we‘re part of their squad!

tua was the life of the party, she made the whole room dance and sing along when ‘geiles leben’ came on (that was when most people had left already bc we went in so late)... it was such a special moment!!! she was also really confused whether to speak german or english to us, bilingual queen!

lea gives the BEST hugs that was so unexpected for such a tiny person, she REALLY goes in wow.

jobel... all i remember is that my face was literally buried in her hair while we were hugging and she smelled amazing!

and lilly omg... lilly! my favourite bean, so easy to talk to, the best aura! she was kinda stretching her legs out when we got to her (l m a o) and kept thanking us for waiting so long (which... a few of them said that... and i always replied with a hä?! thank YOU for doing this for so long!) and rolled her eyes just at the thought of the aftershow party they had planned and told us she‘ll only drink water though! lmao

mile as i mentioned earlier was being so motivational, yelling “we‘re gonna do it! we‘re gonna get through all of you!“ in between again and again, probably more for herself than any of us haha. we did end up talking about food with her, which... you know. foodies amongst each other. ;)

found a whole new appreciation for louis... who poured so much of himself into carlos oh my god. chill. quick witted. hilarious!

so now i left lukas for last. as i briefly mentioned before, i didn’t go up to him after romeo&juliet, but this time i did (there really was no other option when you were there, that would‘ve been rude lol) and i wasn’t let down. at all. he was one of the few people who actually properly introduced himself and that is SO nice, one of the things i’ve always loved about people who are in that kinda position, you know? he is just the sweetest sweetheart, we all know it, he’s proven it over and over. he ran across the room bc some fans forgot their photos at their table, that’s how considerate he is. while we were waiting for our pics to be printed, he came over and hugged us AGAIN and made it a point to say goodbye. MY HEART. 💕

oh, also... we noticed that the mile/flo/louis/lukas group was the most organised with the whole picture situation... they had a ~system going y‘all. lmao

okay. i think this might be it for now. OOF. if anyone actually read all that... you deserve a cookie. i know i promised coherent thoughts, but this is. what you’re gonna get. oops?

if i remember other bits and pieces i‘ll put them in my tags or whatever.

i‘m gonna see myself out now.

[lovelybuccky]

Three Things That Are Certain (Chapter 5)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: Your mother once taught you that when you feel afraid, you should look at your surroundings and find at least three things that are certain, just three things that you know to be true. However, a collection of photos are found from different points in history, and you are in every single one. Questions are being raised, and you are finding it more and more difficult to name those three things. But he is there to remind you of what they are.

Warnings: Violence, profanity, graphic violence and descriptions of pain in later chapters.

A/N: Woohoo it’s back! I made this part a little longer just because I felt the others were too short...hope this is better! (Also I scheduled to post this at 3am UK time because apparently that’s the best time to post for other timezones??? I don’t know haha we’ll see if it works)

Previous Chapter

(^^ gif from here)

Previously...

“I woke up in the 1941, completely in control. I guess after all their tries they still couldn’t find a method strong enough. I wondered around, decided that there were worse places to end up. So I settled down and tried to make a life for myself, expecting to die of old age before Hydra could find me again. But I suppose the Stone doesn’t just effect the time around me, but also my internal clock, since I haven’t really aged since I woke up in Brooklyn in 1941. I’ve been on the run since, knowing Hydra would look for me eventually, since I never completed my mission.”

“Which was?”

You look at the ground, shame oozing out of you. You were dreading this moment. This is where everything shifts. You avoid all their curious gazes, holding off the inevitable.

“Y/N,” Steve’s voice spoke gently, but strongly too, “what was your mission?”

Your eyes flicker back to Bucky to find him already watching you, confusion etching his features. You fear his reaction the most, and you know that there is no chance that he could ever trust you, not anymore. There’s still so much you haven’t told him, so much that you both weren’t ready for him to know. But this is where things get complicated. You hold eye contact with him for as long as possible - until the very last second.

“I…was sent to kill Steve Rogers.”

***

You wake up shivering on the city ground, a crick in your neck and a splitting headache. Every bone in your body, even ones you didn’t realise you had in the first place, ache and click as you hoist yourself up off the cold concrete. You fall back against the stone wall, a small yelp escapes you as you wait for your head to stop spinning and for the black blotches in your vision to fade away. Panic washes over you as you take in your surroundings.

You’re standing in an ordinary alley amongst garbage, alone - but something feels off. You can’t put your finger on it, but you feel like your way out of your depth, like you were picked up and thrown into a world that you don’t understand and that doesn’t understand you. You try to think about what it could be, but concentrating only makes your headache spike. Deciding to scope out the area, and with one hand against the wall for stability, you hobble out of the alley and onto the street.

As soon as you are out in the open, you instantly notice that you don’t recognise anything. The brand of cars, the design of clothes, the shops - nothing is familiar, nothing like the New York you know. You carry on walking along the street, head up high, ignoring the pain that shoots through head as you do so. It’s quiet, almost tranquil - until you hear a crash.

Your hand reflexively darts for the gun in your holster, the holster that you don't even remember owning, and you inch past the movie theatre and towards the alley, leading you to the source of the sound.

But before you can look round the corner, a man with blood oozing out of his nose comes stumbling out onto the street, and you almost shoot him on sight out of pure shock. He doesn’t even notice you as he bolts from whatever or whoever gave him a bloody nose.

“Sometimes I think you like getting punched.”

Wait, you knew that voice.

You peer round the corner, and the sight makes bile creep up your throat.

James Buchanan Barnes and Steven Grant Rogers.

Without thinking, you instantly aim your gun between the latter’s eyes. You have no idea why you did, it was like your body overtook your mind and started working on its own accord. Sweat trickles down your face and you start to shake uncontrollably, messing up your aim.

You stay like that, watching them. Half of your brain is saying “shoot”, and the other half is shouting “don’t you dare”. It hurts in a way that you’ve never hurt before, this mental game of tug of war.

“You know, it’s illegal to lie on your enlistment form.”

Enlistment form. Soldiers. War. World War? There were two…World War II? 1940s? America versus….wait, America? Sergeant…no, Captain…Captain America…

And that’s when it comes flooding back.

The years locked in a cell, the training, the green liquid - and your mission. The reason why you’re here. Whatever they used to control you wasn’t strong enough and has worn off - and that means you have a choice.

You lower the gun, and you run; heart pounding in your chest and legs burning with every slam of your foot against concrete. You have no destination, the only plan is run until you feel safe.

You never stop running.

***

Once again, to nobody’s surprise, Bucky Barnes can’t sleep. Despite his heavy eyelids and his even heavier muscles, his mind is racing at a million miles a minute, replaying scenes of the night before.

After a small disagreement and a few words of reassurance from Steve, Tony had finally agreed to allow you to stay at the compound until it was certain that you were safe, and that you had provided them with as much information as possible.Tony wasn't entirely convinced, and you didn't seem to be either, to be honest, but Steve insisted on it. “Innocent until proven guilty”, he said.

“Seems pretty damn guilty to me.” Tony snapped back, “She literally just said her mission was to assassinate you, doesn’t that seem a little guilty to you, Rogers?”

“Am I dead?” Steve said calmly. Silence. “Exactly. If she was guilty, then I wouldn’t be standing here in front of you right now and we wouldn’t be having this argument in the first place. Give the kid a break, she’s had a hard enough time as it is.”

And now he’s here, hours later and honestly? He’s torn.

This is a risky bet. Steve’s life is literally on the line. If it was anyone else, he would have kicked them out of there the second “to kill Steve Rogers” passed their lips. He had beaten up punks who had threatened his best friend before, and he could do it again. But this is different, Steve is now more than capable of defending himself, and she is different. He couldn’t hurt her, not even if he wanted to. She knew him when he was the Winter Soldier, she knows a part of him that nobody else even saw, and he knew her too, apparently. That connected them, he can feel it; even if he can't remember her because his brain is too damn broken, he can feel that they are somehow intertwined - and that, for now, was enough for him. But that still didn’t stop alarm bells ringing in his mind.

He closes his eyes and lies there for a little longer.

…Fuck it.

He gives in, forcing himself out of the warm embrace of his bed and throws on his gym clothes. Sure, it was 3am, but he found that an hour or so of hitting a punch bag usually helps him let to let off steam. Or at least focus his mind on something else until his body is forced to sleep.

He makes his way to the compound gym, not thinking about being quiet. Years of stealth training made sneaking around like second nature to him, and besides, he had the floor to himself.

Well, nearly to himself.

He had requested it actually, not because he wanted more privacy - though that was an added bonus - but because he didn't want to keep the others awake when his nightmares inevitably cut through the silence. It only isolates him more from the others, but they deserve to rest well, and they can’t do that unless he is out of the way.

But that means that there are spare rooms (the only spare rooms) on his floor - the top floor. So now he is sharing it, and he is sharing it with you.

He stops by your door, listening in to make sure he hadn't woken you.Yes, his trust in you was debatable, but he wasn’t going to be a jerk about it. When he hears nothing but silence from behind the closed door, he carries on on his way.

It’s all a bit silly though, isn’t it. First they rescue a girl from an organisation that they thought they had destroyed years ago, then they find out she can time travel, and then they discover that she was actually meant to assassinate America’s golden boy and Bucky’s right-hand man. It sounds like something he would read in a book. A fictional book.

He hates that he doesn’t trust her, and he hates that there’s nothing he can do about it.

As he reaches the entrance to the gym, he hears muffled thuds and grunts coming from inside. Peering through the glass door, his eyebrows shoot to the roof at the sight before him.

It’s you, in some spare gym clothes and drenched in sweat. A few wisps of hair stick to your face, and your eyes are fixed on the punch bag in front of you. One foot forward, turned slightly inward; one foot back, turned slightly outward. You're on the balls of your feet, bouncing lightly and soaring from position to position. One fist stays in front as one guards your face, though they switch roles with every punch you throw. The perfect stance.

Bucky wonders how you learnt to fight, and his heart aches when we realises you probably had to teach yourself. Probably from trial and error.

You’re striking the punching bag like your life depends on it, and if he looks hard enough, he can see faint purple circles under you eyes - you’re obviously were having a similar night to him. But he is mesmerised by your concentration, it’s like you’re dancing. Your eyes are trained on the bag, but there’s a softness in them, an innocence in the way they glisten. Sixteen. You were sixteen years old when you were forced to defend your life, and that makes Bucky’s blood boil.

Normally, he would turn away and wait until the gym was empty. He doesn’t want to be a dick and avoid people, he actually wants to become closer with his teammates (to get to a point where he called them friends rather than teammates), but he just doesn’t feel like he can. Solitude was the easiest and safest option.

However, this time he stays. Maybe it’s the way your eyebrow are furrowed, or how your arms are shaking from probably hours of punching, but something tells him that you shouldn’t be alone; that you could benefit from some company. It’s a thought that surprises him, but doesn’t stop him.

As soon as he pushes the door open, your focus snaps to him. He puts his arms up in surrender, an attempt to calm your shock. There’s a beat, then he clears his throat. “May I?” he asks, nodding in the direction of the punching bag next to you.

You square up, in an attempt to compose yourself after how embarrassingly obvious it was that his mere presence alarmed you. “Be my guest.”

He moves past you to the punching bag and gets to work. You watch him for a moment, admiring the force with which he can hit, and not failing to notice the way the muscles on his back move under his slightly too tight t-shirt. You feel your cheeks start to burn at the thought, and immediately turn back to your punching bag.

You both carry on like that in silence, only the sound of flesh meeting leather filling the room. After what you said last night, you don’t know where you stand with Bucky, but it feels nice that he’s there and you aren’t alone.

Not entirely, anyway.

***

1945

You curse under your breath as you search for your house key on your keychain. Why do you have so many damn keys? You’re a factory worker, not a fucking locksmith. Finally finding the right key, you jam it in and voila, you’re inside. Once you close the door behind you, you proceed to re-lock it - one key lock; three bolts, one for the top, middle and bottom of the door; 2 night latches; and one chain lock for good measure. It was a little excessive, but better safe than sorry. You throw your bag onto the kitchen table and shake your heels off, hanging your coat up on the brass hook by the door.

The walls of your house are covered with framed photographs, newspaper clippings and postcards; anything to make it feel more homely. It’s small, only two rooms, a bathroom and a tiny deck at the front of the house - which provides the perfect spot for reading. It isn’t much, but it’s enough for you.

You practically slide over to your turntable and select your favourite album. Your mood is instantly lifted when jazz fills the room, and you sway your hips to the beat as you dance towards the kitchen. It’s been a long time since someone has taken you dancing, you think to yourself.

You laugh at yourself as you bump into the counter, itching to make yourself a cup of coffee. The day had dragged at work, but a trip to your favourite bookshop and a quick conversation with the sweet old lady next door had cleared your mind.

So much so, in fact, that you forgot the date.

You continue to skid and slide across the wooden floor as the music plays, your own laughter filling the air of the otherwise empty house. You had somewhat gotten used to your new life. It had only been a couple of years and yes, it still hurt like a bitch, but you were finding yourself in more moments like this - laughing, dancing, adjusting. Your life depends on you being a chameleon, you are just lucky that you used to adore studying the 1940s in history class. After a few minutes you finally settle down and sip on your coffee, looking out onto the street.

There are two little girls playing hopscotch, pigtails bouncing with every jump. There’s another little girl, offering her chocolate bar to a boy who had scraped his knee, and one young mother - sat on the steps of her house, clutching her baby as silent tears escape her eyes.

That last one isn’t an uncommon sight. Everyday, some poor woman receives a telegram, and it is rarely good news. Your heart clenches and you grip your cup a little tighter. That kind of pain is unbearable, not only losing someone whom you have given a huge portion of your heart to, but to lose them in the way she has, and leaving behind a future they could only dream of. You imagine that’s how your parents felt when you disappeared with no goodbye, no final “I love you”.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat, you make a mental note to visit the woman sometime next week. Maybe just this one time you can come out of hiding to help someone.

The longer you watch, the more you realise that everyone in the world has someone by their side. One little girl has the other to re-braid her when when it comes loose, the little boy has the girl to watch over him and lift him up when he falls, and the mother and child have each other - to love each other when they know he isn't coming back.

But you were in this on your own, like a lone wolf in a forest full of packs. That’s how it has to be, you can't afford to have someone else around. You don't know if or when Hydra will find you and snatch you away from the life you've built. You can’t do that to another human being, have them rely on you and then leave them in the dust, a thousand promises broken.

You feel loneliness start to creep in again with open arms, but you know that if you went to it, it would never return your embrace, but laugh at you for thinking it would.

Distraction. You need a distraction. A thought pops to mind: you haven't read the newspaper yet. Granted, it wasn’t the best distraction you could think of, since it was rarely happy news that inked the page. But it kept you in the know, and that was enough to give you a sense of control, and therefore, a sense of security.

You grab the newspaper and make your way to the sofa, but you stop in your tracks as you read the headline.

‘HOWLING COMMANDO JAMES B. BARNES KILLED IN FREIGHT CAR ACCIDENT’

Something in your gut sinks and tears prickle your eyes as you read and re-read the headline over and over, refusing to submit to reality.

The words scream at you, begging for your attention and acknowledgment, like an alarm clock or a screaming child. Your vision lags and your legs buckle, bringing you to the floor. You hunch over the paper, sobs racking through your body.

This is where it begins. You know what he’s going to go through, what they’re going to do to him. Your nails dig into your palm as tears stream down your face. You wish it was you instead.

Loneliness watches on from the doorway.

***

Bucky saunters into the kitchen, everyone is starting to wake up but it’s only been a few hours since he was with you in the gym. You left not long after he arrived, claiming that you needed to sleep before the further tests and questionings that would take place later that day. He assumes that’s where you are now.

The only other person in the kitchen is Steve, who’s pouring himself a glass of orange juice after his morning run, “Rough night?”

Bucky usually joins Steve on his morning runs, unless he doesn’t sleep well the night before. Which, to be honest, was quite often these days. Bucky nods before plonking himself onto a breakfast stool, and starts to twirl a pen that he found on the counter in his hands.

Steve sets down his drink and leans against the counter, face-to-face with Bucky, “What’s going on, Buck?”

He shakes his head dismissively, but he can feel Steve watching him like a hawk. There’s no way Bucky can lie to him, so he gives in, “I just don’t understand.”

Steve quirks an eyebrow. Bucky continues, “I don’t understand how you’re so calm in a situation like this. She was sent to kill you, Steve. I know we can’t just throw her out or get rid of her, but don’t you think we should be more cautious? How do you have so much trust in her after what she told us?”

Steve merely laughs and shakes his head, amused by his obliviousness, “Because of what she told us,” he replied smoothly.

Bucky narrowed his eyes at him, still not getting it. Steve moved round the counter and placed himself on the stool next to Bucky, leaning his elbows on the marble surface, “A young and helpless person captured by Hydra, brainwashed and tortured into becoming a murder machine. Now where have I heard that before?”

Bucky sets the pen back down on the counter and finally looks at Steve, “This is different.”

“How?”

“It just is.”

“No, it’s not,” Steve says sternly yet affectionately, “Buck, you gotta have more faith. You can’t keep living on ‘what ifs’ and tip-toeing around everything. Here is someone who understands what you went through, and who you understand. That connects you, why do you feel the need to cut the rope?” He pauses, “Are you sure you’re wary of her just because of what her mission was?”

Bucky hesitates, before fixing his attention back on the pen, “She said she knew me when I was…him.”

“Then you also share a past, and that’s something only you two have. She’s the only one who was there when you went through that. Not me, not anyone else - just her. You have a choice, you’re allowed to have connections with people, you know. You don’t have to be alone.”

“I have you.”

“Yeah, but you could have more.”

Bucky remains silent, he can feel Steve’s eyes on him but refuses to admit that he is right.

Steve finally gets up and heads towards the door, turning around at the last moment, “Just talk to her, punk. If not for your sake, for hers. You may have me in this world, but she doesn't appear to have anybody.”

And then he’s gone, and Bucky is on his own again. He knows Steve is right, of course he is.

Bucky grabs his keys and heads towards your room.

***

Next Chapter // Masterlist

A/N: Any feedback is greatly appreciated <3

Tags:

@letsthedogpackandthecats

[topbiohacking]

How to age Well. 5 Secrets to Age Well!

Aging Gracefully Is A Choice! Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

There are few people you might know of in your life and when you see them you immediately think ‘wow, they are really aging gracefully! Is there a secret? Or did they inherited some special genes?’ It’s a simple question, but the answer might surprise you.

So, what does it really take to age well?

Diet: Not a specific diet, but a balanced diet of what you already like to eat!

Exercise: No Crazy exercises that you will do once and regret for the rest of your life. Something you already like but a new way of doing it.

Memory Health / Brain Health: To do everything right, you need your memory to remember, and remember correctly.

Skin & Hair: What we put on our skin eventually makes its way inside (partially or in an indirect way) the same goes for our hair.

Cell Health: Everything boils down to our cells! This is where everything started from, so it makes sense that we should fix everything at the roots.

First – Diet

When we usually talk about dieting we always like to label our diet with some sort of a name. However, if you are looking for a specific diet and diet plan, maybe this is not the article you are looking for. Even though we will be talking about food and nutrition from the inside out. 

But for us, we look at diet and food from a holistic approach. You need to eat almost everything, and everything in a moderate amount will benefit you. There are many diet plans out that tell you to stop completely consuming one thing or another. But most people who start on those diets, don’t make through the first month. The main problem with such diets that they are not sustainable. Cutting something out ‘cold turkey’ might work for some, it does not work for the majority. 

Food Variety Is Key To Provide Us With All Nutrition Image by silviarita from Pixabay

For diet, we are going to provide the tips that will give you the best results with the least amount of effort! Tips that will require you doing less not more. It sounds like a good deal. Right?! Let’s dive in. You need to look at those three areas ONLY:

Look at your food consumption for a longer period of time. Not daily. Balance it on a weekly basis, monthly and overall basis.

Stick with organic whenever you can.

The dirty dozen and The Clean 15 lists. A simple list of food that you want to get organic, and another list that you might be able to go with the non-organic. The top 15 foods with the least pesticides are called the Clean 15, while the 12 foods with the most pesticides are called the Dirty Dozen. The list is courtesy of the Elizabeth Rider Blog 

THE DIRTY DOZEN (2019)

Buy these organic whenever possible – Updated 2019

Strawberries

Spinach

Kale

Nectarines

Apples

Grapes

Peaches

Cherries

Pears

Tomatoes

Celery

Potatoes

+EWG’s Dirty Dozen Plus:

Hot Peppers +

THE CLEAN 15 (2019)

These are ok to buy conventional (not organic) – Updated 2019

Avocados

Sweet Corn

Pineapples

Sweet Peas Frozen

Onions

Papayas

Eggplants

Asparagus

Kiwi

Cabbage

Cauliflower

Cantaloupe

Broccoli

Mushrooms

Honeydew Melons

Second – Exercise

Exercise is closely connected with diet. We can’t talk about one without the other. Also, the same goes for exercise that goes for dieting. Most people who start a brand new exercise that is totally different from their daily activities, typically they will give up on the new routine quickly. 

For sure, there are some crazy cases where people stick with it from day one and keep going forever, but most of us, we need to adapt those exercises in our daily life one exercise a week, or one exercise a month. 

This Is The Reality Of How Most People Feel About Exercising. Especially, Trying Something New For The First Time

This Is What We Think Of Ourselves When We Exercise For The First Time! It’s True After A While But Right Away.

Here are a few steps to get your exercise ‘requirements’ done easily:

Things you like to do or you are already doing. If you like walking, then start with it. If you like working out, then do this. If you like hiking or even as simple as shopping. Yep, you read it correctly. You can just add a few steps to your shopping trips. Park the car further, do a few more laps around the mall. Chase your kids, or grand-kids around the yard, the park, or even the living room. Take the stairs down and the elevator up. Or half-half.

Break a sweat. If you can break a sweat in whatever you do then you nailed it! Sweating is a sign that you are putting your body in activity mode. Nothing too crazy, but just a little to move you forward ahead of where you are today. Usually, 3-5 min of high-intensity exercise should be enough to break a sweat.

Add one more. By the end of the day, you just want to add one more pump to your heart to keep it pumping longer. One step, one repetition, one pound of lifting weight, one positive change no matter how small it is.

A Walk With Your Grand-kid In A Fresh Air, Is More Thank Just An Excellent Exercise! Image by emailme3 from Pixabay

NOTE: Never, Ever use your progress in dieting and exercising as a rewarding/excuse to bring bad habits that you are trying to move away from. The reward of walking the extra mile is not another donut. You are better off without them both in this case.

Third – Memory Health / Brain Health

There’s no point of dieting and exercising if we don’t remember doing them. It might sound silly to bring up such a thing, but it’s so real. We don’t remember to exercise until it is too late in the day or the week. Or we forget what kind of activity we planned on doing today. So, in this case, we are missing on our physical health because of our mental health. 

“Sometimes you will never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory” Photo by Roman Kraft on Unsplash

Our brain is the most important organ in our body. It is the central computer of the whole body. When we start forgetting, slipping off mentally, we lack mental clarity, memory issues, lack of focus, and other issues. Those are problems on their own, but also they are signaling issues that are occurring from our bad food, lack of activity, sleeping behavior, and so on. However, the good news is that we can reverse most of them. We can change our food, and see it in our brain, and we can feed our brains and see the results on our bodies. 

That’s how science started discovering the types of food that will help our brain become healthier and stay healthy. Few of those foods are:

Wild Salmon – Omega 3

Walnut 

Avocado 

Almond

Blueberries 

Broccoli

Coconut oil 

Turmeric – curcumin 

Dark chocolate

Drinking water – Brain content is 80% water.

Two more tricks/ hacks that will help improve brain health, but has nothing to do with food and as easy as eating food, are:

Brush your teeth with the opposite hand. That will help your brain develop new neural connections.

Learn something new! Anything. Learning new skills, activities, games, crafts, new learning helps the brain to engage, wake up, and spark the young activities that once used to have.

Skin Care Is Not Luxurious, It Is Essential Image by chezbeate from Pixabay

Fourth – Skin & Hair: 

We often don’t think much of what we are putting on our skin & hair from deodorant, shampoos, lotions, sprays, etc. We pay attention to the way it smells, the way it makes us feel, but not the ingredients, or how we are getting those results. 

A simple example of this case is that we use lots of deodorants, but we are not sure (aware) of how they are working. Most of them use harsh chemicals to kill the bacteria that are causing the odor, but at the same time is hurting our skin. There is a nice article by publicgoods that explains the way ‘deodorant’ works on our body.

The same goes for shampoos that we use, we like the smell, the price, and maybe the results, but over time we start losing hair. That’s when we start looking for solutions and start educating ourselves on what we the heck we are putting on our hair.

If you think you are starting to go bald, you might want to check this blogpost First Signs Of Balding

And if you are a woman losing a lot of hair then you need to start with considering treatment from the source, the scalp first. Here’s a good blog post I found for this (it has good humor in it as well haha) Inside My Quest to Find the Holy Grail of Hair Care

Fifth – Cell Health

Last but not least, is the health of our cells. Out of everything, this is what all boils down to. It takes no genius to figure it out, but it’s important to say it over and over that the health of our cells is the health of our body.

The problem that we see out there with all of these big corporates and big money, is that they look at each problem in a very disconnected way from other problems so they can sell you an UNLIMITED number of product “solutions”. While the core thing is to look at the main source of all the problems which are our cells. 

Our Health Start From The Health Of Our Cells Image by Colin Behrens from Pixabay

The health of our cells starts by fighting Cellular Stress.

What Is Cellular Stress?

Nrf2Science describes that “Too many damaging free radicals — or too few protective antioxidants — can wreak havoc on cell membranes, mitochondria, and DNA, leading to tissue damage and a wide range of chronic diseases, including cancer, chronic fatigue, diabetes, arthritis, and heart disease. For more than 50 years, scientists have known the aging process to be linked to highly reactive oxygen molecules produced during normal metabolism. These oxygen molecules, often called “free radicals” or “reactive oxygen species” (ROS), can react with and cause damage to cellular structures throughout the body. Particularly vulnerable to oxidative damage are cell membranes, DNA (genetic material), and mitochondria (where cells generate energy)—and damage to these vital areas often means that cells cannot function properly.” Cellular Stress/Oxidative Stress is something that we need to combat in our cells as it has been linked to many chronic diseases like cancer, chronic fatigue, diabetes, arthritis, and heart disease, etc.

Oxidative Stress Diseases

Some of the chronic diseases that are linked in a way or another to oxidative stress

The Cause of Oxidative Stress

Even though Oxidative Stress is harmful to the cell, it is part of its natural behavior. According to Nrf2Science “Sometimes, the body deliberately makes free radicals in order to neutralize viruses and bacteria.” Also, scientists have found that the cell produces free radicals during its normal metabolism. However, the problem arises when there are too many free radicals that they begin to interfere with the cell’s normal functions. The increase of free radicals might also be from external sources as well. External factors like food, pollution, smoking, pesticides, fungicides, chemicals, etc.

A quick search on the topic of Oxidative Stress and the diseases related to it will yield quite some results, probably more than what we would like to see. However, relatively speaking, all research seems to be limited, or new in age. But for the most part, this is where taking antioxidants started taking off. Things like vitamin C supplements, vitamin E supplements, eating more blueberries, etc. The kind of routine that we have been familiar with. The only issue with this approach is that we are supplementing our body with external antioxidants, which is better than nothing but is very limited in the amount of effectiveness in combating oxidative stress and eliminating the increasing number of free radicals.

The Best Solution I Have Found & I Personally Use & Put My Reputation Behind…

The other emerging approach, which is the one I subscribe to, is ‘hacking’ the Nrf2 pathway to signal the production of antioxidants within our body itself instead of supplementing our body with external synthetic antioxidants. In my mind, I imagine our body as this perfect computer and at some point it starts to slow down (due to aging and other factors), instead of me upgrading the machine by adding better processors, which is not possible to our “human-machine”, I will try to optimize my existing system/ body to perform better to go back to its original capabilities.

Releasing the system from the unnecessary burden that we are putting it in, is much easier, and more efficient than upgrading or supplementing with external resources. That’s where Nrf2 Activation comes into the picture.

We can think of Nrf2 as the new sheriff in town! Oxidative stress & Cellular Stress are the bad guys. The antioxidant is the policemen. Everyone is telling you to add more policemen to your body to fight the bad guys, which is a good idea, but what’s even better is that you have your body making its own policemen if you enable the sheriff to do their job! NRF2 is the sheriff you need on your side!

Get The Best NRF2 Activator…..Period!

By The Way, If You Don’t Take Anything Away From The List Above Then Take One Thing & One Thing Only, To Get The Fastest Results! Activating Your NRF2 Naturally Please Don’t Go Another Day Without At Least Giving Your Body The Benefit Of The Doubt, To Heal Itself From The Inside Out!

“No Matter how much it gets abused, the body can restore balance.” 

-Deepak Chopra

Get The Best NRF2 Activator…..Period!

Resources: https://jimkwik.com/ https://blog.publicgoods.com/breaking-a-sweat-antiperspirant-vs-deodorant/ http://www.nrf2science.com/ https://www.elizabethrider.com/dirty-dozen-clean-15/ http://blog.topbiohacking.com/wp/blog/we-keep-hearing-that-western-diet-is-different-than-eastern-diet-eastern-western-mediterranean-etc-why-it-even-matters-how-diet-affects-nrf-activation/ http://topbiohacking.lifevantage.com/blog/inside-my-quest-to-find-the-holy-grail-of-hair-care/

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[peachyzens]

love letters (one)

love letters (one)

masterlist: previous | next

genre: fluff summary: “I’ve only seen you from afar, but I can see how great you are.” Crushes were unconventional, especially the one you had on Kim Mingyu. (2,557 words) a/n: eeks here is the first part of my series inspired by “To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before” !!! this is something i’m excited about, so stay tuned for the upcoming parts ❤️ this also ended up being longer than i thought but i’m happy with it so it doesn’t matter!!! masterlist can be found here! 

It all started back in seventh grade of middle school, when silly you took notice of a lanky boy still in his awkward phase. While most may think that the boy had cooties or something of the sorts, you found him adorable. Seeing how he would slightly trip over his feet when walking to throw his trash away, you had to stifle a giggle. That boy was Kim Mingyu.

Honestly, nobody ever talked about Kim Mingyu, he was just an ordinary student like the rest of you. People would rather talk about Xu Minghao, the adorable transfer student from China, or Lee Seokmin, the school’s talent show winner for the past two years. Mingyu was friends with them, but it seems like he always went unnoticed behind his friends, but he definitely did not go unnoticed by you.

You couldn’t tell anybody that you might’ve harbored a little crush on Kim Mingyu, while your friends Rachel and Jennie would constantly gush over Lee Seokmin or Xu Minghao. You just gushed along with them, though it wasn’t as genuine. However, you were lucky that the trio were constantly together; it gave you chances to admire Mingyu from afar while under the facade that you were just like any other girl—gushing over the two heartthrobs.

Returning to your sanctuary of a room, you sat yourself at your desk. Pulling out some nice stationary you got from the corner shop that cute grandma ran, you pulled out a sheet. With a nice pen in hand, you just let your feelings out on paper.

Is that too much?

Wow, this is too cheesy!

Gross, what am I thinking? This is NOT the Notebook or something!

You loudly groaned as crumpled sheets of paper littered your floor. Resting your head on your desk, you ran your fingers through your hair. Who would’ve known that writing out your feelings would be that hard? It’s not like you didn’t know how you felt, you knew yourself more than anyone! But why, why couldn’t you get these feelings on paper?

Sitting up once again, you gathered all the discarded papers and unfolded them, laying them out across your desk. Looking at each one, you narrowed the dozen of letters to a final three, three letters you felt had the most meaning. After minutes of lulling over the same letters and reading the same words, it all started to look wrong in front of you. With grumpy grumbles, you dug around your closet before you pulled out an empty Vans shoebox, grabbing all the letters and placing them in there before shoving the box back onto the highest shelf in your closet. You immediately crashed onto your bed and let out an exhausted sigh. Who would’ve known that feelings were that tiring?

The next day, you found yourself at your usual table, following the same routine of glancing over at Mingyu sitting a few tables away. “Who do you keep looking at?” Crap. You were caught.

“Nothing! I don’t know what you’re talking about?” You laughed nervously under the piercing stares of your best friends.

“Don’t lie to us! I saw you taking peeks over in that direction!” Rachel argued back, before blatantly turning her head back to stare over in Mingyu’s direction.

“Stop that Rachel!” You yelped, trying to get Rachel to turn back around before she draws any more attention than what she already drew. Jennie just watched the scene with a sly smirk on her face.

“Is there a little crush you have that we don’t know about?” She inquired to which you denied profusely.

“Of course not! You guys know that I tell you guys everything!”

“Then who were you staring at?” Rachel egged you on, finally turning back around much to your pleasure.

Your mind was racing a million miles per minute, there was no way you could tell them you were taking peeks at Kim Mingyu! Not to mention the two star boys weren’t there, so you couldn’t use them as your scapegoat.

“Uh, Jeon Wonwoo!” You let out, taking notice of the boy who was sitting a few feet away from Mingyu. He was definitely not the one you were checking out, but he was a more socially accepted choice. You watched your friends jaws drop, feeling a cold sweat wash over you as you continued to put up a facade.

“Wow, who would’ve thought you were into the older boys huh?” Rachel elbowed you with a knowing smirk. Jennie nodded in agreement.

“My brother is friends with him, should I ask him to introduce you?” Jennie asked, already pulling out her phone and getting a message typed.

“No Jen, you don’t have to do that. I doubt he even knows I exist!” You sighed exasperatedly.

“Mhm honey, I’m not too sure about that. You’re more popular around here more than you think!” Rachel smiled, patting you on the shoulder for reassurance. Yet, you didn’t feel reassured at all.

“Anyways honey, you know we always got your back, and my offer is still out on the table.” Jennie winked at you, causing you to roll your eyes. Great, you were able to cover up your crush on Mingyu, but now your friends think you are crushing on someone that definitely was not Mingyu.

“Excuse me,” a soft voice took your attention. It was Friday after school, and you were ready to race home. You turned to find the owner of the voice, only to find THE Jeon Wonwoo sheepishly standing there.

“Uh, may I help you?” You responded, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible despite the uneasy feelings arising in your chest.

“Um, yes, I mean no!” He started off, clearly nervous. He took a deep breath before continuing. “I just wanted to tell you that you are pretty, that is all!” Wonwoo let out in a quick breath before running off, leaving you in a daze. Did he really just call you pretty? You would be lying if you said your heart didn’t flutter, because it did just a little bit. But the thought of Mingyu saying that to you? It fluttered a LOT.

“Woah, he said what?” Rachel nearly exclaimed before you quickly shushed her. You guys were chatting in the quad before classes were starting, and people were still in a zombie-like trance.

“Wow, I didn’t know he had it in him,” Jennie chuckled.

“Yeah, me neither,” you sighed, slightly confused about where your heart lied. You were probably thinking about Wonwoo more than you should’ve over the weekend, and traces of his words constantly lingered in your mind. With Wonwoo constantly clouding your mind, you almost forgot about your true crush on Mingyu that was slowly being covered up by your fake crush on Wonwoo. It was complicated.

“Alright class! It is time for a new partner project! For this project, I will be assigning you a piece from our solar system unit, and you and your partner will make a folder following the guidelines posted. Now, onto announcing the partners!” Your enthusiastic teacher spoke too perkily for how early it was, based off the silent class. You inwardly groaned, you detesting group projects, you always ended up being paired with unhelpful people who would constantly rely on you, which ultimately leads to you doing all the work in the project. You were snapped out of your daydream upon hearing your name be called, and it was the moment of truth.

“…your partner is Kim Mingyu, and you guys have Callisto!”

You felt your heart nearly drop to your stomach, you almost forgot that he was in your class. Well, that was definitely going to make things a bit harder for you. Taking a glance at the boy, you noticed him staring at you with a boyish grin and sheepish wave. Yup, it was definitely going to be harder.

“So, y/n” Mingyu started as he shuffled into the seat next to you.

“You know my name?” You responded immediately, out of instinct. You inwardly smacked yourself, cursing your mouth that moved faster than your thoughts.

“Well, yeah, Ms. Jones said your name out loud and we have a few classes together.” He responded, almost staring at you in a strange way. Great. Way to make a good first impression! But hey, at least he noticed you before.

“Oh yeah, haha I don’t even know why I said that!” You laughed it off, hoping he wouldn’t see through your laughs that you were panicking on the inside and starting to sweat a bit.

“Anyways, so how about this for the folder,” he spoke, no longer about anything personal but solely about the project. You thanked the heavens that you were blessed with a partner that is actually willing to pull their weight and not push it all onto you. “…does that sound good?” Oh shoot, you were totally lost in your thought that you weren’t even paying attention! Great, now he’s going to think your incompetent! “Hello? Earth to y/n?” He waved a hand in front of your face, a cheeky smile pointing at the edge of his lips.

“Huh? Yeah, I think it’s a good idea. Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.” You cleared your throat, hoping your pounding heart wasn’t loud enough for him to hear.

“Great! So you will…” He spoke animatedly, as you just blankly stared at his face. You never knew that someone could be so enthusiastic when talking about one of Jupiter’s moons, but it seems like Mingyu never failed to surprise you. “So can I get your number?” His words snapped you out of your trance.

“M-My number?” You stuttered, inwardly cursing yourself for appearing so stupid and foolish in front of him.

“Yeah! So we can keep each other updated on the progress of our project!” Of course that was the reason, it couldn’t have been for anything else. Your heart tried to convince you it was for reasons other than the project, but your mind was quick to shoot that idea down. And before you could say anything else that could possibly embarrass yourself, the bell rang, dismissing the class. “I’ll text you! See you around!” He smiled at you with that boyish smile you found so endearing, and he was gone just like that.

You sighed out loud, you were in big trouble again.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Rachel eyed you for the nth time during lunch.

“Yes, I’m perfectly fine! Peachy keen!” You smiled as best as you could, the best being an awkward smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

“Honey, you are definitely not okay, want to talk about it?” Jennie placed her hand on your shoulder, giving you the reassurance you needed.

“Well, you see, in science we got this new project and she picked partners for us,” you started, the girls attention solely on you, “and I was partnered with Kim Mingyu.” You paused, just to look at their reactions. They didn’t really show anything different, so you continued. “And basically, I wasn’t in my right mindset and I kept zoning out so he probably thinks I’m stupid!” You finished, letting out an exasperated sigh. Rachel rolled her eyes at you as Jennie continued to pat your shoulder.

“It’s just Kim Mingyu, if it was Lee Seokmin or Xu MInghao it would be a totally different story.” They reassured you, but that was what they didn’t get. It was Kim Mingyu, the boy who was throwing your heart around between his hands. Great, you were practically on your own in this war of feelings.

Nervously pacing about in your room, you anxiously awaited Mingyu’s reply to your text. You added in a little emoji instead of ending it with a brief period, and his lack of response was making you pace around even more. With an exasperated yelp, you sat yourself at your desk and pulled out the same stationary you ran through pages of nights before. However, this time your pen was able to easily glide across the paper, your feelings all written in one sentence. With one final press of a sticker on the envelope, it was ready to be sent out.

You hoped your parents wouldn’t be suspicious of you asking to get dropped off thirty minutes earlier than normal. It was definitely something out of the blue, especially for someone who sleeps until the very last minute. When they asked no further question, that was one weight lifted off your chest upon the many that still weighed you down.

It was eerie, walking down the normally lively hallways that were abandoned at this time. Most people were probably eating breakfast or just waking up, you were nervously pacing in front of  a single locker. You might’ve spied on Mingyu after escaping your friends with the excuse that you had a question about your project. You stood in front of locker 117, the locker that held Mingyu’s books and other personal belongings, and will soon hold a short letter that has your feelings in them. With another quick scan of your surroundings, you slipped the note into the locker before running away, as if it would explode. Now, half the weight was lifted from your shoulders, now remained the last half.

You played the waiting game, sitting down on the staircase down the hallway, fiddling with your fingers as more people flooded the building. You sat on a few steps higher up, giving you and elevated view of the hallway, more importantly, Mingyu’s locker. The said boy has yet to show up, and you felt the weight on your shoulders with each passing second he would not appear. With a loud sigh, you prepared to just abandon your post as class would be starting in five minutes, and your class was in another building. Standing up and dusting your skirt, you took one last glance at the locker before freezing.

He was finally there! Oh no, he’s about to open his locker! Will he see the note? God, I hope he doesn’t know that it’s me. Was my handwriting too obvious? No way, I purposely wrote in script!

Your thoughts raced around in your mind, your pounding heart hitting your eardrums upon seeing him hold up the light blue envelope that was familiar to you. He looked around, eyes taking a scan of the students ushering to classes, not landing on you. Well, that lifted a bit of the weight off your shoulder. With a slight shrug, he continued to open the letter, pulling out the light pink paper that held a few words.

Kim Mingyu, I’ve only seen you from afar, but I can see how great you are.

Seeing how his confused expression morphed into one that was shy with rosy cheeks, you felt more of that weight slip off your shoulder. It was when you saw that blinding smile spread across his face when all the weight slipped off your shoulders, replacing the feeling of fear and dread with joy and warmth.

If there was one thing you were going to remember about seventh grade, it was definitely going to be the smile the spread across Kim Mingyu’s face after reading your little note, and your first ever tardy that you weren’t even upset about.

[marisa-writes]

Lol can I just do 19-30 because i don’t know what you have and haven’t answered xx

OF COURSE you come at me with nearly half the list. Truly Eliza style.

19) any new fics to start next year

No, nothing definite in the new year! I’m trying to decide if there will be a new Giam one-shot to open up the year, as has been the case since writing/sharing At the Stroke of Midnight just after the new year back in 2016. So far, only a vague idea’s been dancing around, so I guess we’ll see.

20) number of comments you haven’t read

Ah, no longer belonging to an actual fic website means no more traditional reviews, so I have read every message I’ve received about my writing in this past year! I think there were a few I had to get to on 1dff right before the site went down (I think they were for the first half of Boring), but alas. I did a lot better with responding to my reviews on 1dff than I eventually did on JBFA, but the numbers were a lot different. 

21) most memorable comment/review

I received a lot of really great messages this year, from people who related to Rolly and Elementary because they, too, are teachers, or are learning to be teachers, or work in a school environment, and those were wonderful. I received a lot of messages about representation of WOC in my fics from appreciative readers who made my heart soar because they understand my mission. I received a lot of hilarious messages from friends after I dropped sangria out of the sky, and messages from readers about the drabbles that followed. I’ve appreciated all of these in ways I can’t even put into words. But recently, while talking to my friend Janelle @janellewrites about ROG and how it’s stayed with me despite how slow writing’s come, she said this and it stayed with me, too:

And I feel like I need to say that I really do think it’s special that this story has stayed with you so long. I just went & read your tags on the chapter posts and it reminds me of something one of my writing buddies told me awhile ago. Sometimes big ideas live with you so long because they’re waiting for you to catch up with them. Or in other words, there will be a time when you will be equipped with all the tools you need to make the words flow on their own and it doesn’t matter how long it takes to get there!

That was exactly what I needed to hear. 

22) events you participated in this year

None, sadly. I always want to participate in writing challenges but I am the literal worst at committing to them.

23) fics you wanted to write but didn’t

I’ve already mentioned two - Basketball Jones and Roots - but ROG could also be added to this list. I just wish I could speak those stories into existence and have the words write themselves, you know? Ah, if only.

24) favorite fic you read this year

There were a few, actually. bright baby blue by Natasha @wokeuptired is phenomenal - I love Jelly beyond words and find her so relatable. I read (and then reread and reread and reread) RJ’s @madminniefics one-shot, when time froze and HOWLED with laughter and then burned up by the end because Kaia’s characterization and her growing relationship with Niall was written so fantastically. Brianne’s @abejas-fic holiday one-shot, only wish this year, was the loveliest, coziest little Christmastime read. YOU came at me with full english and I fell head over heels for Amelie and Niall and Wallace. And my pal Cat @finding–cat returned with new writing in the form of one of the most captivating pieces of fiction I read all year, The Longest Sky. I have a ‘to read’ list that is miles long, though, so in the new year I’ll probably have lots of favorite things from 2017, but of what I did manage to get to, these are some of my absolute favorites.

25) a fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read

Damn, Marisa, back at it again with recommending everyone read The Longest Sky! It’s no secret that I’m Cat’s biggest fan and essentially the leader of her fan club, but biases pushed aside (because I do adore her as my friend, so I am a bit biased), this story is 110% worth your time if you like feeling things beyond measure. It’s brave, and honest, and touches upon the things we carry inside us that terrify us when they come to the surface because we are deeply afraid of being misunderstood. 

26) number of favorites/bookmarks you made this year

UM yeah I haven’t kept track of that. The ‘to read’ list is just long. That’s all I can say.

27) favorite fanfic author of the year

@finding–cat, @wokeuptired, @fromherlips, @madminniefics, @abejas-fic, @janellewrites and your stupidly talented ass.

28) longest fic you read this year

Already answered this one! SURPRISE! IT WAS THE LONGEST SKY!

29) shortest fic you read this year

Probably one of RJ’s @madminniefics latest little drabbles, or a little teaser of something @janellewrites shared that was only a snippet of something larger, but it really struck me.

30) favorite fandom to read fic from this year

All I read was 1D fic, so…1D? Haha.

THANKS FOR ALL THESE, LOVE YOU!

[ascension-soliloquy]

Mistborn first read- The Well of Ascension part 1.0 chapters 1-5

Spoilers for the chapters covered

On this post I began to go further in depth, and give a little bit of a recap, at least in some places if I had anything to say. I was going to try to avoid Wheel of Time comparisons, but I got a few chapters in and failed miserably. So starting with this one: is people rolling their eyes the smoothing of the skirt, sniffing, or braid tugging of this series?

Expectations and predictions:

•Since it’s the title of the book, I assume that by the end we will know what the Well of Ascension is or what it does. Right now it’s some mysterious thing we keep hearing about that has something to do with how the Lord Ruler got his power, but not much beyond that is known. 

•I still worry about Marsh. He was instrumental in defeating the Inquisitors and the Lord Ruler in the previous book, but he went in deep for the cause. That can’t be good for his mental or emotional state. I think something bad is going to happen with him. 

•Vin will continue to get more badass as she gains more experience with Allomancy. Maybe she’ll even figure out how to use both Allomancy and Feruchemy like the Lord Ruler did. 

•The Deepness will continue to exert its influence on the world, and make things uncomfortable for everyone. 

Part 1.0: Heir of the Survivor (chapters 1-5)

Chapter 1

There’s no prologue! Wow! Nonconformist! Haha 

It’s the beginning of the second book and there is an enemy army already. Where did it come from? Are there other nations? Is it led by Inquisitors, or perhaps noblemen? Aha, it’s Elend’s father. 

Ham still says, “the Lord Ruler only knows...” I guess old habits die hard. 

Or else he’s an enemy agent. I’m sure some of the characters are. I suppose I should keep an eye out for clues. 

OreSeur (the kandra formerly known as Lord Renoux) meets up with Vin, “...tone respectful—yet somehow still a little hostile. As always.” Why does he sound hostile? Should we not trust him, or is this just how Vin perceives him? Is this an unreliable narrator situation? Does he resent the fact that Kelsier is dead, but he still has to serve Vin? Is this just a personality quirk?

Vin has been following a mysterious person who may also be following her. Looks like that person, or someone else is attacking her. *cue dramatic music 

Chapter 2

Vin’s attackers are eight Mistings. The mysterious Watcher (why the capitalization?) briefly interferes, seemingly helping Vin, but for the most part she is on her own, eight against one. 

As the fight goes on, and Vin beats several of the attackers, the Watcher helps again, revealing a Mistborn among the other Mistings. Vin is forced to use her last bit of Atium in order to defeat him. She will be vulnerable after this. 

OreSeur is injured and will need to find a new body, but Vin won’t let him use any of the attackers. I wonder why, seems like that would be convenient. Well, I mean obviously she’s squeamish about the whole thing, but get over it Vin. You just killed a bunch of people. It can’t be that much worse. Just don’t watch him do it. 

Chapter 3

Elend’s political theory clashes with real life practical implementation. 

Vin used the mist to fuel her Allomancy in the fight with the Lord Ruler. I missed that part in the first book. Was it even mentioned? Will she be able to further develop this ability?

Vin senses someone burning metals, but has trouble figuring out where it’s coming from. Then she sees a faint figure forming in the mist. Shoot first, ask questions later; great plan Vin!

Ham tells Elend and Vin that the assassins Vin fought earlier were from the west, which means they probably weren’t sent by Elend’s father. Ham thinks they were sent by a western king named Ashweather Cett. Elend is worried about being overwhelmed by foreign armies and doesn’t think his kingdom will last much longer if they don’t come up with a plan. He lists off all the problems they are facing. “Oh, is that all?” Ham said. “See? It’s not so bad after all. I mean, we could be facing an immortal god and his all-powerful priests instead.” Bah duh buh 

Chapter 4

Sazed is examining the body of a villager who died mysteriously. Another villager witnessed mist swirl around the man before he died. This was during the day, which is unusual because the mist normally only appears at night. Perhaps this has something to do with the misty figure Vin saw earlier. Maybe shooting first actually was a great plan. I doubt this person or entity would be forthcoming if she had asked questions first. Ooo...could this be the Deepness, or something related to it? (Resist the WOT comparison...resist the WOT comparison...AAAARRRGHH...sorry I have to do it at least once.[spoiler warning] Is it like a bubble of evil from the Dark One? Nah, I’m sure it’s something different that I’m not aware of yet.)

“...not to mention Sazed’s own experience several weeks before.” What was his own experience? Was that mentioned and I missed it, or will he go into it later?

After he buries the man he tries to teach the villagers about the religion that their ancestors may have followed, but they show little interest. “There are other things—more practical things—that I can teach you.” Hmm, I wonder what that will be. 

Chapter 5

“And I am the one who betrayed Alendi, for I now know that he must never be allowed to complete his quest.” I’m really interested to see how this Kwaan came to feel this way. What did he find out?

Vin reflects on where she came from, both her life as a skaa street urchin, and her time pretending to be a noblewoman. She notices someone following her unskillfully. Soon others join him. They are skaa, expecting her to lead them where the Lord Ruler once did. She briefly interacts with them, but is unsure how to respond. 

She gets away from them, comes across a merchant selling dogs, and asks for a wolfhound. The merchant tries to sell her a small, docile one, but she picks the biggest, meanest one she can find, and punches it in the head, knocking it out. “Oh, for the Lord Ruler’s sake...” Okay, it’s not just Ham; old habits do die hard. 

She takes the dog to OreSeur and commands him to use it as his new body. Okay, that is not where I saw this going. I thought she was going to use it as a regular guard dog. That is clever. Will he be able to talk with his new dog mouth? If he didn’t resent her before, I’m sure he will now. 

Vin receives a new alloy from Terion, an Allomantic metallurgist, a combination of aluminum and copper called duralumin. Is duralumin an actual thing, or something made up for the book? I wonder what it does, if anything. I’m sure it does something, otherwise why bring it up? 

“...but you did not command me to tell you if packages arrived.” Uh oh, definitely resentment. I don’t remember him being this sassy in the first book. 

Elend and Dockson apparently pretend to like each other for the good of the kingdom. 

Vin and Elend discuss OreSeur the dog, and how Elend would prefer Vin to have the kandra with her when she goes out. “...they’re incredibly loyal—I’ve never heard of one breaking Contract.” There’s a first time for everything, Elend! Discussion turns to Kelsier, and how Vin loved him as a friend, but couldn’t be in love with him. He was too harsh. Elend remembers how Kell saved his life, and how that surprised him. Vin tells him it’s because Kell knew she loved Elend, and that was enough to overcome Kell’s hatred of the nobility. 

Ham shows up and Vin decides to test the new alloy. It doesn’t appear to do anything, but at least it doesn’t make her sick. Ham wants to practice sparring. Vin wants Elend to as well, so he is able to defend himself. It’s funny how Elend is trying to convince Vin to take someone along for protection, and Vin is trying to convince Elend to learn self defense, but each is resistant to the other’s argument. 

*This is going to be significantly longer than my post about the first book. I’m going to break it up into sections so it isn’t a mile long. I’ll see ya when I get through the next batch of chapters.

[theartofbeinganerd]

Hi :) Are you still taking prompt ? I was hoping if you could make something post 4x19 about Aida finding out Jemma is pregnant while trying to kill them or something and then exchange Fitz against Jemma's and the baby's life without Jemma knowing it but then she find out she's pregnant too and realize why he's gone with Aida and go for him with the team to reunite their family ? Sorry if it's messy, I hope you get the idea haha Anyway I really love your writing

Hi!! Thanks for the prompt! :)

I ended up setting this more toward the end of 4x20, but it goes AU from there (and disregards the Superior and the government being after SHIELD plots of 4x21/4x22); hope that’s okay!

(Ao3)

-

Nearly finished overseeing the completion of Project:Looking Glass, AIDA strode through the base beneath the oil rig, quicklyscanning through a stack of folders containing information she’d missed whileplugged into the Framework. Most of it was irrelevant, but her attention wascaught by a single file.

Pausing, she tossed aside the useless folders, focusing herattention on the one that contained all of the data sent back from the LMDs she’ddispatched to SHIELD’s base. Though only the Daisy LMDs had made it out, she’dstill received updates from the others before they’d been destroyed, and asingle tidbit of information from Fitz’s LMD caught her eye.

AIDA read it over once more (though of course she didn’thave to; she had been programmed not to make mistakes), then arched hereyebrows.

“Interesting.”

-

“I think that I’m a bad person,” Fitz admitted, growing moreand more nauseated the longer he thought over the terrible things he’d done inthe Framework. He’d never questioned the morality of any of it; he’d simply tortured and killed people without a singlethought to their lives because to him they weren’t even human.

What kind of sick, twisted person did that? Who was he, really?

“No,” Coulson insisted, shaking his head, “no, you –” But,he cut himself off, his gaze trailing to something over Fitz’s shoulder.

Still struggling to breathe properly with his heart racing amile a minute in his chest, Fitz slowly turned to find whatever it was that hadCoulson looking as though he’d seen a ghost.

“Leopold,” AIDA greeted him through the wide, disbelievingsmile spread across her face.

His thoughts all a jumble, Fitz blinked, then asked, “Ophelia?”Because he’d noticed AIDA’s decapitated body nearby, he remembered finishingProject: Looking Glass, so that had to be…

“I am so happy to see you,” she said, then paused andmurmured to herself, “This is what happiness feels like.”

“She’s not a robot anymore,” Coulson stated, catching up towhat Fitz already knew had to be true. “AIDA bleeds just like us.”

Fitz barely heard the words though, his confusion over the lifehe’d lived in the Framework meshing with his life back in the real world, andthe spark of awe that his machine actually workedand created a human body from nothing moving him forward.

But, as he heard the sound of a gun cocking behind him andAIDA’s excited observation, “Finally, you can feel the real me,” Fitz snapped out of his momentarydaze, taking a half-step away from her.

As Coulson and May both called for him to move out of hershot, he hurriedly took another step, just out of AIDA’s reach.

She didn’t seem to appreciate his retreat, quickly growing upset,the desperation clear in her eyes, and Fitz held his breath – he knew what shewas capable of, after all. She lowered her voice to a hiss only he could hear,and told him in no uncertain terms, “If you want to save their lives, you’llcome with me, Leopold.”

Fitz’s eyes grew wide, and he shot a quick glance over hisshoulder at May and Coulson. “Please, don’t hurt them,” he pleaded, shaking hishead.

A smirk curled AIDA’s lips, and Fitz felt a trickle of coldfear down his spine. “I wasn’t talking about them; I was talking about yourprecious Jemma,” she spat Jemma’sname as though it was a curse, and Fitz had a flash of memory, of the last timehe’d seen Jemma – he could still feel the weight of the gun in his hand, couldstill picture the broken look on her face with tears rolling down her cheeks asthough it was burned into his brain, “and your unborn child.”

He was so caught off-guard by the addition, Fitz almost didn’tregister the words at first. After a handful of seconds, the time it took torun back over what she’d said, the words ‘unbornchild’ hit him like a punch to the stomach.

What?

She had to belying, had to be trying to sway him into going with her; she must have thought thatJemma might not be enough, so she’d made up a fake pregnancy to insure hiscooperation.

But, her gaze never wavered, she showed no visible sign ofdeceit, and he just knew, somehow, that it mustbe true.

And as the idea that somewhere, Jemma was carrying theirbaby sunk in, Fitz knew that even though he was a terrible person and he’d doneawful things and he didn’t think Jemma would ever even be able to look at himagain, he’d do anything to protecther and their…their baby.

So, Fitz gave a single nod and stepped forward once more. Triumphantly,AIDA grasped his arm as Coulson shouted, “No!” and they disappeared.

-

Alongside Daisy and Elena, Jemma burst through the door ofthe final room of the base hidden beneath the oil rig that Radcliffe’sinstructions had led them to. Immediately, Coulson and May looked up from wherethey’d been crouched on the concrete floor, Coulson helping May back to herfeet.

Hoping to have somehow just missed him, Jemma took anotherlook around, but all she could see was Mack’s unconscious body (which Elena hadinstantly gone to) and the decapitated body of AIDA (the sight of which leftJemma with a spark of satisfaction). A bit desperately, she asked, “Where’sFitz?”

May and Coulson exchanged a heavy glance, then he told hergently, “Simmons…AIDA just…she disappearedwith him.”

Jemma shook her head, automatically rejecting the very idea,because she couldn’t have just gotten him back only to lose him again beforeshe could return to his side. But, suddenly there was an even more horrifyingthought niggling at the back of her mind, and she inhaled a shaky breath as sheasked, “Did…did he want to go with her?”

There was a beat of silence, then May started lowly, “Simmons–”

But, Jemma cut her off before she could say a word, becauseno matter what either of them said, she wasn’t going to believe it until shesaw it with her own eyes. Fitz was herFitz in this world, and nothing could change that, especially not an obsessiverobot and her brainwashing alternate reality. “There has to be something thatwe don’t know; that has to be it.”

Neither of them looked completely convinced, but they bothstill nodded, clearly understanding that she wasn’t about to give up on Fitzwithout one hell of a fight.

-

Once they were safely back on the Zephyr with Mack carefullyplugged into the Framework, Jemma excused herself to the small lab on-board theplane. It wasn’t long before she found herself pacing, using the time and quietto try and figure everything out; it just wasn’t making sense.

What could’ve possibly gotten Fitz to willingly go with thekiller android that had taken him captive and forced him to become a twistedmonster against his will?

She may not have known the Doctor as she’d hoped she would,but she knew Fitz – her Fitz, the oneshe’d befriended at the age of sixteen, the one she’d grown up alongside, theone she’d spent the better part of thirteen years beside, the one she’d fallencompletely in love with. She knew hewouldn’t have chosen to go with the person responsible for this whole messunless he’d had to.

Perhaps Coulson had been mistaken; perhaps Fitz hadn’t had a choice.

Jemma paused in her pacing then, suddenly feeling a bitfaint. It wasn’t the first time this had happened since she’d come out of theFramework; she figured that it had to be from the lack of proper nutritionwhile plugged in, and the fading adrenaline that had kept her going sinceescaping the Playground.

Just as she caught herself on the lab table, Coulson stuckhis head into the room. “We’ve just landed, and I want full medical work-upsfor everyone who was in the Framework, no arguments.”

She swallowed back her protests, making a face as shesteadied herself before following him out of the lab and down the stairs toexit the Zephyr with the rest of the team.

They entered the Playground through the destroyed hangar,thankful to find that the rest of the base had been left mostly unscathed. Andafter a brief interlude where they were scanned by the suspicious agents remainingand found to not be LMDs (much to therelief of the other agents, who seemed to have been struggling to operatewithout their highest-ranking agents), they were brought to the lab.

Immediately, Jemma crossed over to her desk and began afacial recognition search for Fitz, even as a lab tech came over to take herblood, temperature, blood pressure, and other necessary medical tests. She hadto hope that, wherever AIDA had taken Fitz to, they were close enough to bespotted by a camera.

The sooner they rescued Fitz from that walking nightmare,the better.

She was still dutifully watching the search run when thetech returned to her side, holding a clipboard with her test results in hishands. “Well Dr. Simmons,” he said brightly, “you’re in perfect health.”However, then he grimaced and added, “Other than the knife wound and mildconcussion, of course.” When Jemma arched an eyebrow at him, he fidgeted withhis clipboard, then managed another smile as he told her, “The important thingis, you and your baby are safe and sound.”

Just as Jemma demanded, “My what?”, the computer beeped behind her to show that the facialrecognition search had finished running.

Negative.

-

Positive.

Again.

Positive.

Again.

Positive.

No matter how many times Jemma ran the blood test, she kept receivingthe same result – she was pregnant.

She felt as though she must be on the verge of a panicattack just then, her breathing and heartbeat picking up speed at an alarmingrate as the truth settled into her brain. She’d spent the last week and a halffighting tooth and nail to get Fitz back, only to lose him to AIDA once more,and on top of all that, now she found out that she was expecting their child?

How in the world was she supposed to deal with all of that?

Just then, Daisy reentered the lab, leafing through a filefolder. Without looking up from it, she explained aloud, “This was taken fromAIDA’s lair under the sea.” She tapped the folder with her free hand. “We’rehoping there might be a clue in here as to where AIDA’s gone and what herendgame is.”

Jemma wanted to say something,to ask if she’d found anything promising, to offer her help; but her lungs wereseized with panic and fear and the overwhelming feeling that she was drowning.

When she noticed the lack of response, Daisy frowned andpeered up at her curiously. Her eyebrows rose in concern when she noticed Jemma’swild-eyed panic, and she quickly set down the folder before hurrying to herside. “Are you alright?”

The only words to make it past Jemma’s lips in response werea flat, “I’m pregnant.”

Daisy blinked, as though the words didn’t quite register.Then, she gasped out, “Are you serious?”

Jemma gave her a dry look, taking a breath and anothermoment to gather her thoughts before attempting to speak once more. “If themultiple blood tests I’ve run are to be believed, then yes, I’m quite serious.”

For a moment, Daisy gazed at her worriedly. Then, she askedsoftly, “Well what are you going to do now?”

She didn’t reply at first, mulling over the question and herreply, before she stepped around Daisy and picked up the folder she’d beengoing through. “The first thing I’m going to do is find Fitz,” she finallyanswered, beginning to flip through the pages and scanning each one carefully.

About halfway through, she happened upon one with her name printed across the top, and sheread through it quickly, pausing when she found the medical records Fitz’s LMDhad managed to work up on her, in preparation for her delivery and introductioninto the Framework.

It had included a blood sample – which, of course, revealedthe truth of her condition before even shehad known.

As the realization that AIDA had had access to this hitJemma, it all clicked, and she suddenly had a very good idea of how AIDA might’veconvinced Fitz to go with her without a fight.

-

“HYDRA had a way of tracking Gordon’s teleportation ability,”Jemma explained to the others once they were back on the Zephyr and in the air,“and we should be able to as well.” Turning to Coulson, she double-checked, “You’resure AIDA’s powers looked similar to Gordon’s?”

“I am,” Coulson answered confidently.

“And I remember Gordon coming through HYDRA’s doors in theFramework – and never leaving,” May admitted, the tight set of her jawrevealing just how much the memory of the atrocities she’d allowed to happenand aided in affected her.

Jemma nodded gratefully, turning to Daisy. “Alright, then webetter get to work on replicating their tracking system.”

Thankfully, it only took them a short amount of time to finishit, but then they were left to wait until AIDA decided to use her powers –which could be never, Jemma couldn’t help but remind herself. AIDA mightsomehow know they had a way of tracking her, and she might decide to abstainfrom using her powers, secreting Fitz away somewhere that they would never befound.

Another hour passed without a hit, then another, and Jemmacould feel herself growing more anxious by the minute, her hands wringingtogether as she went back to her pacing. AIDA truly could’ve taken Fitz anywhere, and she couldn’t help but fearfor his mental state after everything he’d experienced in the Framework.

But more than that, she just wanted him there, with her and their…baby.She really, truly needed him now – and she wanted to believe that wherever hewas and whatever was going on in his head, he needed her too.

As a swell of overwhelming emotion began to wash over her,fear and sadness and grief and desperation combining to pull her under theirdepths and force tears to her eyes, Jemma heard a distinct beep from the computer.

Hurriedly, she turned to find that their program had pickedup an instance of teleportation.

Jemma released a shaky, relieved breath, her shouldersdrooping a bit as some of the tension left them. Unable to help herself, sheplaced a hand over her still-flat stomach and whispered, “We’re going to saveyour daddy,” before she dashed off to inform May of the new coordinates.

-

The coordinates of AIDA’s teleport had led them to a housethat was more mansion than anything else, one that May had recognized as MadameHydra’s from the Framework. Given that there hadn’t been any more hits on theirprogram, they knew that at the very least, AIDA had to be inside that house.

As the others prepared a surprise visit, Coulson told Jemmain no uncertain terms, “You’re staying on the Zephyr.” She opened her mouth toprotest, he was quick to remind her, “AIDA knows about the baby, and sheclearly isn’t above using it and you as leverage.”

Jemma certainly agreed with Coulson’s assessment, but shecouldn’t help but feel disappointed – she wanted to get to Fitz as soon as shepossibly could, and couldn’t bear to be so close but have to wait even longerstill.

However, their baby’s safety had to come before her desireto be with Fitz a few moments sooner. “Yes sir, I understand.”

As Coulson turned to exit the Zephyr down the ramp, hepaused and half-turned back to add, “And even if that weren’t the case, I’dstill make the same call.”

She managed a small smile as she watched them all leave,then the ramp retract, until she was left alone (well, not totally alone, giventhat Mack and Elena were still upstairs, plugged into the Framework – she’dused the confusion to her advantage and entered it in an attempt to rescueMack).

Placing a protective hand over her stomach, Jemma began towhisper to the baby in an attempt to soothe her own growing anxiety. “Yourdaddy’s going to be just fine.” She rubbed a little circle over where the babywas growing inside of her, going on, “Our little family will be back togethersoon enough, I promise,” even though she knew she might not be able to keepthat promise, not when she didn’t know whatFitz was going to be like when she saw him next.

Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, the ramp loweredonce more, and the first one Jemma saw was Daisy. Her expression was hard forJemma to read, but as she walked past her, she informed her lowly, “AIDA gotaway.”

Jemma’s heart began to race in her chest, and she turnedslightly to call after Daisy, “What about –”

But, she cut herself off when she caught sight of him behindCoulson. Without giving it a single thought, she rushed forward, all-butcollapsing in his arms. He hesitated briefly, then returned the embrace, askinga bit roughly, “Are you okay? Is the…”

She nodded a bit desperately, continuing to cling to him asshe murmured against his shoulder, “I’m alright, and so is the baby.” The wordstill felt foreign on her tongue, but…in a goodway, a way she was willing to get used to. “You?”

Fitz released a shaky breath, pointedly ignoring herquestion about his state. “So…it’s true, then?”

Reluctantly, Jemma pulled back just enough to meet histerrified gaze, nodding. “I just found out,” she admitted. “I didn’t knowbefore…”

His wide, horrified eyes began to glaze with tears as hewhispered shakily, “Jemma…the way I hurt you is unforgivable enough, but for meto have done so while you were carrying our child–”

Jemma refused let him finish that thought. “None of that wasyour fault, Fitz.”

“But –”

“You had nocontrol over what you did in the Framework, and I don’t blame you for a singlething,” she insisted, infusing as much honesty and sincerity into her voice asshe possibly could, hoping it’d somehow get through to him.

He still didn’t seem quite ready to believe it, and she knewfrom personal experience the way guilt could weigh on a person, but he gave aslight nod to show he’d heard her, and it was enough for now.

Jemma found his hand with hers, pressing his open palm toher stomach as she told him softly, “We’ll figure everything out – no matterhow long it takes, I’m with you, Fitz. Right now, the important thing is thatwe’re together, and…our baby is safe.”

Fitz gave the faintest of smiles, nodding in agreement as hegently stroked his thumb over her stomach. It may take some time and tears andreminders that she knew wholeheartedly that he was a good person, but Jemma had a feeling that their little family wasgoing to be just fine.

[stilinski-jpeg]

Fueled By Desire (NSFW 18+)

A/N: So, today has been a crazy day but I started writing this last night and wanted to post it tonight ! So I wrote it in virtually 24 hours, so I hope it didn’t suck to bad. I planned on posting it earlier but I had a bit of writers block. This a Theo smut that you can thank @hardladyheart for. She's filled my mind with dirty Theo thoughts. (Fun fact' this gif is actually mine and my blog name used to be twfanfic-af)

Thanks to: @writing-obrien and @hardladyheart for editing and proof reading.

Warning: SMUTTTTT

Word Count: 2803

If there was one thing I knew about Theo Raeken is that he was up to no good. It was apparent in the way he walked, the way he talked, and the way his eyes raked over my body every time he saw me. The first time I'd caught him doing it, he didn't even try to hide it. He just smiled devilishly, ruining my panties instantly. Then it became the only reason we talked. He lived to make me blush; what's worse is that he knew just how to.

“Come on gorgeous, you're just teasing me now.” Theo smirked as I walked past him.

Today I was wearing a skirt that was a little too short and a shirt that was a little too low in the front. I knew exactly what I was doing with I put them on that morning. Theo always looked at my legs like they were two pieces of meat that he was ready to devour. So when I pulled the small piece of black fabric out of my dresser, I didn't think twice before I slipped it on.

I stopped, eyeing him skeptically. “I bet you call all the girls gorgeous.”

He chuckled, falling back and leaning on the lockers. He folded his arms over one another, giving my body one more once over before meeting my eyes. “There's no one as gorgeous as you.”

I rolled my eyes, adjusting my backpack on my shoulder. Theo was such a smooth talker. I knew he could get anyone to do anything, including me.

“Oh Theo.” I sighed, patting him tenderly on the shoulder. “You're going to have to try harder than that.”

I made a point to look him up and down, before walking away. Returning the gesture he often paid me. I swore I could hear a low growl behind me but with the sound of the hustle and bustle of the hallway, I couldn't be sure. So I sashayed away, swinging my hips a little more than necessary knowing full well that Theo was watching.

I yawned through my next class, lazily writing notes as the teacher scribbled on the chalkboard. The day seemed less eventful when Theo wasn't around to flirt with me.

Buzz buzz.

I jumped slightly feeling the vibration against me. I ducked my head, pulling my phone out to read the text.

Hey Gorgeous.

I rolled my eyes instinctively before quickly tapping out my response.

How did you get my number?

No hello back? I'm hurt.

I was glad her couldn't see the smile on my face. I couldn't let him know that he was wearing me down.

What do you want, Raeken? I'm busy trying to expand my educational horizons and you're ruining that.

He didn't write back right away which had me squirming a little. It only took me a second to realise that's exactly what he wanted me to be doing.

You're so annoying.

Haha. For such a gorgeous girl, you have a rude mouth.

I frowned at my phone reading over the words. I had the rude mouth?

For such a rude boy, you have a gorgeous mouth.

I danced a little in my seat at my witty response. Theo may be trouble but he did know how to get my heart racing. And if I'm being honest, my panties wet too.

You don't know the half of what my mouth can do.

Yep, there went my panties. I shimmied in my seat, squeezing my legs tightly together to stop the low dull ache I could feel there.

I'm pretty sure your mouth is all talk, as usual.

I waited and waited for a response. I was checking my phone every few minutes hoping I didn't miss the text by mistake, but nothing. I read and reread my texts to him, trying to figure out if I'd said something upsetting but couldn't find anything. When the bell rang, it startled me. I fumbled around to get my things into my backpack as most of the other kids were almost out of the door. As I walked down the hall and out of the school, I searched not so inconspicuously for Theo but didn't see him in any of his usual spots. I was just about to give up and head home when he pulled up next to me in his truck.

“Hey Gorgeous, need a ride?” He gave me that look that, even though it was eighty five degrees outside, gave me goosebumps. I didn't answer, instead walked around the front of the truck and jumping into the passenger's seat.

It was quiet for the first few minutes. I was kind of intimidated to be actually alone with Theo, but he seemed to be unaffected. He drove with one hand hanging lazily over the steering wheel, the other resting on the center console. I tried not too, but couldn't help glancing over every few minutes at him. The sun was playing deliciously on his features, enhancing his appearance more, if that was even possible. He rolled his head over at me with a smirk, like he knew I was looking the whole time and chose now to catch me in the act.

“So, where are we going,” I asked, clearing my throat.

“Where ever you want.”

He trained his eyes back on the road and for the first time I realised he was doing this all on purpose. He lived to make me flustered, so the whole cool guy act was just that. An act to get me squirming and it was working. I wouldn't let him win.

“Take me somewhere you can show me what that mouth can do.” I smirked, leaning over the console so my breasts were pushed up in the most perfect of ways.

His face snapped to meet mine, the look on his face hard to read. He searched my eyes before his traveled down to the way my cleavage spilled out of my shirt. He swallowed then looked back to the road. He sped up, swerving dangerously in and out of traffic. Where it should be kind of scary, it was actually exhilarating. He spun off to the left, down a gravel road that leads to toward a wooded area. We only drove a mile in, enough so we no longer could see the main road, before we stopped. I looked around, seeing nothing special about our surroundings.

“Of all the places you could take me, you take me to the woods?”

He smirked, popping open his door and jumping out. I watched as he walked around the front of the truck to my side and wretched my door open.

“You said you wanted to see what my mouth could do, and I couldn't wait to show you.” His eyes were suddenly darker than before as he smoothed his hand over my leg. I bit down on my lip trying to play coy and failing miserably.

“Open up, gorgeous.” He smirked, pulling my leg away from the other, spreading my legs apart. He was in full view of my pink lacey panties now, my skirt now retreating up my thighs. He trailed his index finger over them, leaving a tingling sensation over every spot he touched.

“Mmm, already wet for me?”

“Always,” I whimper.

He seemed to like that answer and rewarded me by pulling my panties over to the side, running a digit through my slick folds. I threw my head back, hissing at the feeling.

“You like that,” he asked smugly.

“It's okay. But it's your mouth I'm more interested in,” I said weakly, doing my best to put up a front.

He responded grabbing the thin material of my panties and ripping them in half. “I'll show you.”

His tone was dark and agonisingly sexy. He grabbed me roughly by my thighs and pulled me to the edge of the seat, pushing my skirt up simultaneously. He ducked his head between legs, his warm breath washing over my core dangerously. I hummed, pursing my lips together to stop anymore sound escaping. But it was too late, I could feel his smirk as he kissed along my thighs teasingly. This boy knew all too well what he was doing and I wanted to hate him for it. That was until his tongue connected with my clit, swirling over the sensitive bundle. I cried out, my hand instantly finding his head and pushing him closer into me. He chuckled, squeezing my thighs tighter as he swirled his tongue in patterns. I was thankful now that we were out in the woods because my moans were animalistic. Theo was not wrong when he said I didn't know what his mouth could do.

“Fuck,” I spat, my eyes snapping shut. I could feel the burn in my belly, the fire that was so sweet calling me to come closer.

Theo's grip loosened around one of my thighs. I opened my eyes to see his hand moving its way towards my mouth. “Open up,” he murmured against me. I obeyed, opening my mouth as he inserted a finger. I closed around it, moving my tongue over it and sucking roughly. He growled against my core, abruptly moving his finger. I whined, but quickly swallowed it when he pushed said finger into my entrance, curling it perfectly inside me.

Together, his mouth and fingers, moved in a overwhelming harmony that had me a moaning mess. I knew that holding out much longer would be impossible.

“Come on gorgeous, give it to me.”

His voice was raspy and hard, the statement coming out as more of command. Telling me that I was going to come, just for him. While his fingers were buried deep inside me and his lips were wrapped around clit. It didn't take much more before I was thrown over the edge, slamming into my climax. My body wretched and jolted as he continued to work my body over until I'd ridden out my high. When he pulled away from me, I was weak; my legs laid limply out of the door.

“You okay,” he asked, the cockiness apparent in his tone.

I mustered all the strength I had to sit up right and try my hardest to pretend he didn't just give me the best fucking orgasm of my life.

“Yeah, I'm great actually. I feel like I could do a whole workout.”

He chuckled, stepping closer to me until our faces were nearly touching. “How about you ride my cock instead?”

A spark rose through me with his words. I couldn't play coy anymore, because riding him into oblivion sounded like the perfect evening to me. I pushed him back softly so he took a step, allowing me to jump out of the truck.

“How about I show you what my mouth can do?” I smirked, turning him quickly so his back was against the truck and dropping to my knees.

He hissed when I popped the buttons of his jeans, his bulge apparent beneath them. I pulled down his zipper as slow as I could, earning me a growl of irritation.

“You know I like it when you tease me, gorgeous.”

I smiled up at him, fluttering my lashes at him. “I know you do. Maybe I just tease and never ever let you feel how warm my mouth is.”

A sound, something like a whine and a growl, erupted from him and he made quick work of pushing his jeans and boxers down. His erection was ready as it sprang out, almost smacking me in the face. There was already a bit of precum coating his tip; I grinned up at him, carefully pulling him into my mouth. I sucked gently on his tip, cleaning all the precum from it before taking it on fully. I sunk down until he tapped the back of my throat before hollowing my cheeks and going back up again. It was a slow torturous pace that Theo got bored with quickly. Without warning, he wrapped his hand around my ponytail and pulled me off of him with a pop. With his free hand, he grabbed my chin pulling it up to him and kissing me hard. Our noses were smashed into each other, but I didn’t care, I was happy just to taste him.

“What do you want, gorgeous?” he asked me with his swollen lips.

“I want you to fuck me.” I replied, clamping down on his lip teasingly.

He pulled me up to my feet, he hand still wrapped around my ponytail, and spun my so that I was flush against the truck making me whimper. He pushed my skirt up over my ass until it pool around my midriff. He let go of my hair to roaming over my backside with both hands, squeezing and kneading decadently.

“God I love you ass.” He groaned, smacking it.

I mewled at the sting, my core become more wet than before. He chuckled, coming down on my again. I gasped, rising up on my toes as he smoothed over the areas he just hit.

“I knew you were a dirty little girl.” He growled in my ear.

“You don't know the half of how dirty I am.” I stuttered out, meaning to sound sultry but coming out desperate.

“How bad do you want it, gorgeous?” I could almost hear his smirk.

“A decent amount.” I teased, and his hand made contact with ass again; harder than before.

“I can find better uses for that smart mouth, if you don't want to answer my questions.”

I was glad I wasn't wearing panties anymore because they would be soaked at this point. God, why hadn't I fucked Theo sooner. I couldn't believe I was missing out on this.

I bit my lip, sticking my ass out for him before finally answering him.

“I fucking need you to fill me.” I whined, glancing over my shoulder at him.

“That all I wanted to hear.” He smirked, before lining himself up at my entrance and thrusting into me, bottoming out.

I cried out, not even attempting to disguise my sounds now. I tried taking hold of the slick truck but couldn't get a grip. Theo was relentless with his motion, slamming into me over and over again. That familiar feeling in my lower abdomen was back and spiralling viciously towards me. His hands were on my waist squeezing so tight the bruises were surely already forming.

“Theo.” I moaned out, meaning to warn him I was about to come but it got lost when he delivered another unexpected blow.

“Say it again.”

“Theo.” I panted, my climax emanate.

“Again.” Another blow.

“Theo.” I cried, my orgasm crashing down on me.

My whole body shook as he continued his motion, allowing me to ride out my high. My legs were weak and shaky but I held out for Theo wanting his orgasm more than my own. Seconds later, his thrust grew sloppy and staggered, he had to be close

“Fuck baby.” I moaned loudly. “I want your come.”

I looked over at him as much as my current position would allow, biting my lips as I watched him coming undone.

“You like this big cock?” He grunted out, holding me tighter and banging into me with hard deliberate movements.

“Yes baby!”

“You want to take all my fuck come?”

“Yes, please.” I begged.

Suddenly, I felt him pull out of me and spurt of hot white come spread across my ass. We both caught our breaths before moving again. We were suddenly both blushing, all sense of sexual tension gone from the air.

A few minutes later we were back to driving. Theo was now shirtless, having given me his shirt to clean up with. We sat in a comfortable silence, words not really needing to be said at this point. Because if they did, we might have had to talk about what happened and that's something I want to experience and not dissect.

We pulled up in front of my house and still we said nothing to one another. Just passed each other shy looks and blushes.

“So, I'll see you tomorrow?” He said finally, bowing his head but I could see the small smile on his lips.

“Well actually.” I smirked, making him snap his head up at me. “I never did take you up on your offer.”

His brows furrowed in confusion, but I saved him the trouble of asking. “You said you wanted me to ride you cock, and I want to.” I smirked, opening my door. His expression was one of disbelief and slight amusement.

“You coming?” I asked, wondering if maybe he'd gotten cold feet.

“Not yet I'm not.” He said, fumbling with his seatbelt and stumbling out of the truck.

[im-writing-under-a-pen-name]

I Knew I Would See You Again (”Why Now?” Part 2) - Jughead Jones Imagine (Riverdale)

Part 1 | Part 3

Hello again, I noticed that you liked my first imagine „Why Now?” and I decided to do a part two of it! Some people also asked me to. I am very happy that you liked part one, you guys amazed me! I really didn’t expect that, thank you for reading it! If you didn’t read „Why Now?” and just came across this imagine, please click above on Part 1 to read, although you will not understand anything. I also made a special page where I will post all of my Imagines. It’s down here:

 Imagines

 About this part I still don’t have any warnings to do because it’s too innocent, haha. I don’t own any of the TV series’s rights and the persons I’m mentioning here aren’t like that in the real life. This is just a story made up by me, meaning that the descriptions of the characters that I’m writing about are based on how the Riverdale’s cast is portraying them. It’s a work of fiction. Enjoy your reading. xx

PLOT: You stayed in Houston for a year. During all this time, you've managed to get in touch with your friends who have made you aware of everything that has happened in Riverdale so far. Even so, you missed them a lot and as soon as summer came, you informed your parents that you are going back to your hometown to celebrate your  18th birthday. You are about to find things that will make you regret you haven’t been with your friends, but most importantly, you will see him again.

You didn’t even feel how time had passed. It’s been a year, a whole year since you left Riverdale for a fresh start and for a better life. It wasn’t like that for you, you had no idea how you got through it. You only wanted the things to be good between you and your parents, but you couldn’t lie to yourself. You’ve suffered and if you’re gonna remember the day you left … The way things went off, you would probably feel sorry. You were absolutely convinced that you weren’t going to disappoint Veronica, Archie, Betty … Jughead, they knew that too. Every one of them kept their word: Archie called you every single day, you would talk to him for hours and he would finally sing something short just to cheer you up. You wouldn’t forget to ask him if Jughead was alright and he would say that he would never lie to you about anything. Archie and Jughead were best friends, you knew he would never abandon Jughead. You and Veronica would facetime everytime you were free. You always told her that Houston is a nice place and that you feel very good here, but you wouldn’t be convincing. It wasn’t the fact that you hated that place, it was just the fact that you knew anyone around here. You were the new girl, the new neighbor … It was tiring for you. Eventually Veronica would make you laugh even if you couldn’t even smile and you would almost fall asleep while talking to her. The blonde one – Betty, was the most worried about you.  She would ask you thousands of times if you are okay and send you a lot of pictures with her and the others so you can watch them whenever the longing became too intense. They made you forget, somehow. For a while, it wasn’t enough.

Then, everything started to get easier. You were accommodating with your new school’s schedule, studying most of the time and getting ready for exams. Sometimes you would think of how you used to eat lunch with Archie, Veronica, Betty and Jughead outside and how anyone could make you feel as they did. There was no fun. There weren’t delicious chocolate milkshakes as the ones at Pop’s were. There was no one named Jughead who would wear his crown-shaped beanie even if he was inside of a house. It was incredibly hard for you not to think about him all this time. You remembered how you cried the first night away from Riverdale and how lonely you felt. Jughead called you that night, you could barely talk. He tried to calm you down, but it wasn’t possible. You simply left him alone after he confessed he liked you. After he tried to show his true feelings towards you. You always knew how odd he felt doing it, and you could imagine how hard it was for him. And you did what? You were miles away now. You would have understood him if he was mad at you, though he said he wasn’t. You almost wanted him too. What if everytime you hung up the phone, he will not talk to anyone else for a long time? What if he wasn’t himself anymore? What if he was stuck? You’re still asking this and you are afraid of a real answer. You felt him so close to you than he have ever been before and you couldn’t show him the same feelings. Sometimes you would want to feel his body pressed to yours, to cuddle him because you never had the chance to do that. Your mother was the first one to fiind out how it was with this Jughead guy, you didn’t need to explain anything to her. She saw you being affected and tried to make you feel better. You didn’t let her. Neither your dad. It was their fault. It took you long enough to get used to the idea, still, you haven’t looked for any other boy’s affection.

When summer came, you knew you had a chance. You talked with Veronica in time, telling her you plan to come back to Riverdale for your birthday. She almost started to scream from happiness when you told her that, but you mentioned her not to tell Archie, Betty or Jughead about that. You wanted to be a surprise. She told you you'd spend the night at her when you got there and assured you she'd keep her mouth shut. Both of you were so excited. You couldn’t help but think about everyone’s faces when they’ll see you. You couldn’t wait to see them too, it was like you were already feeling their giant tight hug against your body. You asked your parents to let you go back, you could not forget this important detail. They couldn’t believe it when they heard you. Your father was red from anger. „No way!” they both would tell you. Of course you couldn’t accept that, so you continued to beg for their approval. They did not want you to leave because they wanted you to be with them on your birthday, not in that town. They seemed so disgusted, as if they hadn’t lived there once. You did everything in your power until you were able to convince them. You promised a short term, after which you would come back home. You needed your friends and some more familiar surroundings for a while. They understood it hard, but you were glad that they did. You were excited to see even Cheryl who was never incredibly excited about your presence. You heard a lot of shocking news about her brother's death and you wanted to find out more. Veronica didn’t give you too many details, she wanted to play with you. You wanted Cheryl and her family to be okay after all the rumblings they've been through since the tragedy.

So the days have passed quite fast with you trying to fullfill your time as much as possible so you wouldn’t need to wait that long. You suddenly saw yourself with all the luggage done, almost as if you wanted to leave faster than you should’ve. Jughead noticed how changed you were every time he called you and you felt him quite surprised. He got used to make you feel better, and to smile sweetly and cheeky everytime you two would facetime. It was funny to lie him ’cause it wasn’t anything serious, you couldn’t wait to meet his mesmerizing green eyes again.

This time you’ll tell him too. You’ll tell him everything.

                                                               ***

You couldn’t stand the place. The taxi driver seemed to drive too slow for your patience. The night was still young. You were so close to your hometown again, you couldn’t believe it. You thought it was a dream, wanting someone to pinch you.  You blinked many times, looking out the window and admiring the landscape. You missed the strange appearance of Riverdale because you still were used to it. You’d have preferred this silence than all that noise back in Houston.  Before you leave home, your mom and dad have warned you: you were not allowed to break your promise. You asked them to come with you so that you will be together on your birthday, it wouldn’t bother you. But your father had his job and wouldn’t let only your mother to come with you. You kinda felt that once you’ll see your friends, you couldn’t leave anymore. But nobody had to know that yet.

You took your phone out of your pocket and checked to see if Veronica texted you. Until now she constantly did that, she couldn’t wait to see you, God. You wondered if she was still the same as you knew her. You wondered if her family was okay, you wanted to know if her love life was up and you wished she didn’t suffer because of your departure. You felt like you couldn’t resist much longer, it’s been so long …

You asked the taxi driver to leave you a little farther from Veronica's house because you didn’t want her to see you or wait for you. You just walked a little, and you never imagined it could be so hard with all the luggage and emotions that were not going to leave you too soon. You immediately recognized the huge building and increased your peace. A little more.

A man opened the door for you when he saw you carrying so much weight. You mumbled a „thank you” and then entered, leading directly to Veronica’s apartment. Standing in front of the door you felt your knees weak. You took a deep breath and then knocked at the door.

Almost immediately you heard Veronica’s voice from the inside:

„Y/N should be there in a few moments.” You couldn’t help but smile when you heard the sound of the door opening.

After that, you just felt like your strength was gone.

A tall girl dressed in a red top and some skinny black jeans looked at you from head to toe. Her dark hair was left free and hang just above her shoulders, as you were used with her wearing it like that. You whined and you covered your mouth with your hand, slipping the suitcasses on the floor.

„Oh my God.” You heard Veronica exhaling. It could’ve happen literally everything in this moment and you would notice nothing but one of your dearest friends looking at you extremly shocked. „Oh my God!” You heard her again. „Y/N!” She wrapped her hands around your neck and squealed. You felt like your heartbeats stopped.

„Hello to you too, Veronica” You tried to say even if you felt like she was strangling you.

„Jessus Christ, are you kidding me, Y/N?! Why didn’t you tell me that- …”

„I guess I wanted to surprise you?” She faced you when she heard your voice. Her eyes were full of life. They practically screamed: „This is the real home you need!”

„Hell, I missed you so much!” She yelled, hugging you again. You started to laugh, but you were too excited, so it came out more like a trembling moan. You weren’t allowed to cry.

„I missed you too!” You stroked her back until you heard her mother’s voice from inside the apartment. The door was wide open. „Wha-What have you been doing lately?” You swallowed a lump in your throat trying to stay still on you own two feet.

She tried to answer you but Hermione interrupted her from behind.

„Veronica hun’, what was that- …” She stopped when she saw you. „Wait, is this …” Veronica turned her head to her, nodding quickly.

„It’s Y/N mom! Look at her!”

Hermione smiled warmly.

„What are you doing here, dear? It’s so unexpected, I can’t believe you’re back.”

„I needed to come back here. You have no idea how hard it was for me in the last few months …” Veronica held her arm on your upper back. Now you only needed a few minutes. Your friend had to tell you everything that happened while you were away.

„Come in. Don’t stay there, we have pretentious neighbours.” Hermione said. You missed the way she treated you, sometimes she would have been better than your own mother. You entered the luxurious apartment, looking around. Nothing was changed. You've noticed all the things in their place, the couch on which you and Veronica used to fall asleep while watching movies, the glass coffee table, the plants ... Too familiar.

The two women helped you to carry your luggage and immediately afterwards you sat down on the couch. You felt that Veronica and Hermione were fighting about who will be the one to ask you the first question. There had been nothing special in the city where you stayed, nothing to talk about.

„Everyone will freak out when they’ll see you. Tell me, how is it? How’s Houston?” Veronica asked, coming closer by you.

„Horrendous without you guys. I'm so glad I made my parents let me come.” You sighed.

„Ronnie told me about this. How did they agree?” Veronica’s mother asked.

„I think it was a miracle. I begged them like a dog.” You joked. „Only once I can reach my eighteens. If they didn’t want to accompany me, I couldn’t do nothing about it.”

„Don’t think about it, you’re here now. That’s what matters the most.” Mumbled Veronica. Her mother was agreeing. ”We really missed you, Y/N, all of us.” You knew it and couldn’t think about anything else. Your heart was empty without them, you imagined that this place was empty too without you all. After all, your group was the soul of Riverdale.

You turned your head to the dark-haired girl.

„I need to know everything. What happened here?” Although you were worried about the answers you were going to receive, nothing will be the same if you didn’t fiind out. You saw Hermione standing up and telling you she will leave you two alone so you can talk. Being curious, you looked straight into your friend’s eyes. She started with the beginning. You found out that just a few months after you moved away, Jughead’s father was the main suspect in Jason Blossom’s death. When Jughead had told you about him, he believed he couldn’t be guilty of anything. He trusted his father after all, because if he wouldn’t, he would have no one to support him. Veronica’s words scared you because yeah, mr. Jones seemed dangerous but he wasn’t a killer. Plus, when Jason was shot, Jughead’s father worked with Fred Andrews. So it couldn’t be true.

Then, Ronnie started to tell you about the relationship between Jughead and his dad which began to tense when the police was after him. They fought often and Jughead slept for a few days inside the school because he didn’t want to bother Archie anymore. He was destroyed during that time, Archie hardly persuaded him to come back. You imagined a scared, teary Jughead who walked alone on the same streets he was once walking you home on. Your heart skipped a beat.

„Please tell me you took care of him.” You said slowly. Veronica nodded.

„Betty was there for him.” As soon as you heard that sentence, your eyebrows furrowed. You felt shivers on your back. Although you knew that wasn’t her intention, you felt Veronica blaming you, somehow. She didn’t say that it was your fault, it was just the fact that Betty comforted the boy you left behind instead of you. And you weren’t jelous or something, it just … Didn’t feel right. The brunette looked at you cautiously before continuing. Maybe you weren’t prepared to hear her next words. Jughead and Betty were together at some point. You just blinked. Betty was the person who managed to be by his side when you couldn’t.

But you were okay with that.

„It didn’t last long. They broke up after two months.” Continued Veronica. „He thought he could see her the way he saw you.”

„How do you - …” How did Veronica know about Jughead's feelings towards you? He wouldn’t tell anyone, he waited until the last moment to tell you.

„He told us but Archie figured out the first.” You remembered the way they would tease you about how you and Jughead were acting in each other’s company. You would’ve smiled if you weren’t worried. „’You alright?” Ronnie asked you.

„I think so. It’s nothing.” You said. As long as you were concerned, things got a bit out of control, you understood that when you realized it was still not sure who Jason’s killer was. Even without you, your friends were trying to find out. Someone was lying and the Blossom family didn’t know what to do.

„I mean, how, Veronica? It’s been a year!” You exclaimed trying to find an appropriate answer in your head.

„It’s complicated. Everyone tell us that.”

Everything was complicated. When you wanted to come back, you were expecting that. You felt that overwhelming sensation again. The negative energy ruled every corner of your body but you welcomed it back with pleasure. If your mom and dad would fiind out what you have found out tonight, they would probably be here within an hour to take you back to Houston. Were you happy feeling so uncertain?

„Tomorrow’s the day. Betty, Archie and Jughead need to know you are back.” After a few minutes when the atmosphere was quiet, your friend's voice was heard. You did not have the strength to retaliate after all you just heard. Your birthday was in two days and you still had things to do. You were supposed to get ready for seeing him again.

That night, after you talked a bit with Hermione too, you slept with Veronica in her king-size bed. The Blossom’s red hair appeared in front of your eyes everytime you’d close them. You almost felt everything Jughead felt when he was alone, barely able to fall asleep.

„Don’t worry, Y/N. You have to feel good. Don’t ruin your time here.” Veronica also told you.

„I’m fine. I know it’ll be fine.”

                                                             *

The next morning Veronica woke you up early so you could dress. She had spoken with Archie and he had invited her to take breakfast at his place. You felt tired but it couldn’t compare to the butterflies you felt in your stomach knowing what yo were about to do. Jughead’s face popped up inside your head. You couldn’t wait to open your arms and let him hug you. Or you would be the one to hug him? It didn’t really matter as long as you were about to feel him that close again. 

„C’mon.” Veronica said, opening the door for you. You said goodbye to Hermione, the you stepped out of the apartment, following your friend. 

„I am so nervous.” You said, as the road shortened and you were getting closer to Archie's home.

„Well, I’m excited.” Ronnie clapped. You tried to calm down your emotions but it wasn’t possible. You imagined Jughead and Archie, you imaged how Archie’s house looked like and before you knew it, Veronica tried to make sure if she could knock on the door or just enter the house without any announcement.

„Breathe.” She whispered to you once you two stepped in. Before you could say something more, she screamed. „Archie, I’m here!” You tried to stop her but you couldn’t. Then, you heard footsteps approaching. 

„You’re right in time.” Your redhead's voice was thicker than usual. „The pancakes are- …” But when he saw you, it seemed like his voice vanished.”Y/N?!” You tried to smile as innocently as you could.

„Surprise!” His mouth was already wide open. He slowly approached you as if he was afraid you would disappear.

„No freaking way.” You heard him say. You felt his strong arms wrapped around your waist immediately. You tried to look at Veronica and meeting her gaze, you saw her mouthing an „I told you.” 

„Oh my God, Archie.” You murmured. You felt he was beyond surprised. 

„Are you real? I thought you would never come back …”

„I’m here. One hundred percent real.” You assured him, patting his back. „It’s my birthday tomorrow. I wanted to be here.” He looked at you and for a second, you really thought he was about to start crying. You couldn’t imagine a crying Archie, instead, you wanted to cry so bad. „I miss- …” You tried to speak, but he suddenly grabbed your hand. You got through the hallway to the kitchen where you smelled the old delicious pancakes with maple syrup. Then, as if it was a dream, you saw one well-known figure.

You started shaking. Your chest was tightening.

„Hey, Jug?” Archie called him. He turned his head to him but he didn’t notice you at first. Just a minute later, he froze.

„Jughead.” You breathed. If Archie and Veronica wouldn’t be watching you right now, you probably would have gone to him and attacked his lips in a well-deserved kiss. You were as speechless as he was. He didn’t say a word. Instead, you saw him approaching you. He looked you deep in the eyes and touched your cheeks with his palms. His eyes were watery. No. Please Don’t.

„Y/N?” Your name fell out of his mouth as a weak whisper. He was still wearing his beanie, but this time it was a different color. You hugged him tightly and you whined into his chest.

„I’m sorry.” You told him. You still felt extremely guilty. You didn’t want to hurt him anymore. You wanted to feel him happy. As happy as he was never before.

„Don’t say that. It wasn’t your choice.”

You leaned your forehead to his. 

„Guys?” You almost forgot about the boy and the girl who were awkwardly standing behind you two. Archie talked first.

„I’ll call Betty.”

Jughead stepped back and looked at you in owe. You wished he would’ve kiss you without shame. You couldn’t say that loud, though.

Exactly like that, you enjoyed the presence of your old friends all day long. It honestly felt surreal. After so long, you were seeing them again. And when Betty arrived and saw you standing there, you couldn’t handle it anymore and started to cry while you hugged her. They grew up too. You even noticed a small scratch on Jughead's cheek, and when you asked him about it, he told you that Archie had mistakenly hit him with the joystick in the face when he lost a round at his favorite video game.

„You silly.” You said, giggling.

Everythig was perfect. You didn’t even dare to ask about Cheryl and her family because you didn’t want to ruin anything. Your friends were incredibly enthusiastic about your returning because they wanted you to have the best birthday ever. Jughead held your hand whenever he had the chance and he didn’t even care if the others were watching you, not even Betty. You felt sorry for her because it was, after all, her ex-boyfriend. She wasn’t bothered at all, she was happy that you were around. You didn’t feel how time passed and before you knew it, looking out the window, it was already dark outside. Until now you’ve been around and at Pop’s with your friends, then you stood in front of the highschool and talked about every possible thing. You also visited Archie's dad, who was surprised to see you; he was in the middle of a phone call and started babbling when he saw you. You wanted to laugh but you didn’t, though.

Right now you and Jughead were on your way to his dad’s trailer. You needed some time alone with him, and around Archie, Betty and Veronica you couldn’t get your plan done. Your hands were intertwined, you felt something strange in your stomach.

„This day was simply amazing. Thank you for welcoming me back this way.” You said.

„Stop thanking us, Y/N. Everyone’s glad that you’re back.” You felt Jughead’s big thumb brushing over your palm. „Will you leave again?” He then asked, in a low tone. 

„I have to.” You answered. You wouldn’t want to leave but you couldn’t stay. Your parents would lock you in your room forever.

You two enjoyed the silence until you arrived and noticed that Jughead’s father didn’t seem to be around. You stood outside. It was hot and the wind was blowing slowly. You leaned your back against the trailer and looked up to the sky.

„Jughead?” He looked at you while his arms were crossed to his chest. „Are you okay?”

„I am.” He nodded. But you didn’t mean that.

„No, are you okay?” You became serious bitting the inside of your cheek. You watched him coming near you. He sighed.

„Yes, Y/N. I am.” You wanted him to tell you how horrible he felt without you, you wanted him to blame you and you wanted him to be angry at you. He wasn’t. He was just enjoying your company. You were an awful person, you knew that.

„I heard about you and Betty.” You spoke out of blue. In a few seconds, he turned his head towards you. 

„Does that bother you? Because- …”

„Jughead relax. It’s okay, I’m okay with that. Don’t worry.”

Silence.

„You know …” He started. „I never stopped thinking of you. Like it only felt right when I was with you.” You felt your throat dry. Your lower lip was already between your teeth and something was devouring you on the inside. You turned your head to him and caught his sad expression. You opened your mouth but no words came out. Before you could figure it out, the space between you and the Jughead began to shrink. In the next moment, it happened. 

His lips stuck to yours as if they were simply meant to be there. Something exploded inside of you. You whimpered instinctively driving your hand to his cheek. Your body pressed more against the trailer behind you while you two kissed deeply and truly. It wasn’t a tongue kiss, it could’ve been just as passionate. You slowly raised your hands up to the end of his beanie and squeezed the little dark hair which was stuck out. You felt him trembeling in the kiss and you knew it was too much for him. But he wouldn’t stop, for you. He pressed his chest to yours and you felt his heart beating. You melted, then and there.

You didn’t know you had your eyes closed until you opened them to look at him while he slowly interrupted the beautiful kiss. He licked his lips, shy and you smiled.

„You have no idea how good is to know that my father isn’t here now.” He murmured, looking at you with such loving eyes. You didn’t expect him to be like that. 

How amazing he was.

„I like you too, Jug.” You whispered, somehow scared that he would just shut you off.

„I knew I would see you again.” He answered, smiling softly. „I don’t want you to leave again, Y/N.” He confessed, staring at the wet ground. 

„I don’t want that either.” When you thought about that, you made yourself sad. You didn’t want to be sad at this moment, you just had the most beautiful kiss in your life. The first kiss that really felt that real. Jughead was always real, he was here all this time, he still was. How unbelievable it was, it was true.

„I think it’s midnight.” You felt his hand reaching to yours again. 

„Maybe …” You said feeling empty. 

„Happy birthday, Y/N.” Your smile, though it was not as big as it should’ve been, it was there. You wanted to push everything away, every bad thought, every cry for help … You just wanted him. You felt your head being turned to him again, this time for him to kiss you for the second time. He hugged your frame with so much care that you could’ve even break into his arms as well, because he would have stick together all of your pieces, all of your parts. It was hard to attach by someone when you knew very well that you both get hurt in the end.

But what if this wasn’t your end?  

It’s here! This is the last part of „Why Now?” imagine. I really hope you’ll like it, I already like to write stuff like this for you. What do you think about it? ’Hope it's not too sad or something, usually I can handle to write sad stuff, I like it. Thank you so much for your reblogs and hearts, it really means a lot to me! And if you ever want to talk don’t hesitate to give me a message. Or ask me a question. Both are okay. Thank you for reading!