#Bored at work and longing for home
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I don’t WANT a career. I want to cuddle and sleep and eat and read and create and love and be loved.
#Feeling like a grumpy anticapitalist hobbit lately#… so#a hobbit#Ughhhhhh#Bored at work and longing for home#20k
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"i cant believe my Long Lost Rival is driving around as some sort of FOOD COURIER instead of FIGHTING ME TO THE DEATH IN THE WRESTLING RING!!!" <- light novel title
this is (probably) not canon but the set up for a meetcute amused me enough to fumble through drawing a comic on my phone. help ive forgotten how to draw my guys!!!
#TAGCEN#by ''prolly not canon'' I mean it's a plausible situation but wouldn't fit anywhere in the narrative.#other fun places to run into your long lost rival: the coin laundromat. a bar/club.#anyway chip would rather extend his stay at a motel than drive home for a few days and then leave for another event.#he already travels a lot as-is. and he'd rather be on the road than in his sister's house...#basil does food delivery app stuff when he's bored. he doesn't have much of a stable job beyond his seasonal commercial fishing thing#basil's definitely met chip with glasses before he just said this to make him mad on purpose (and it works. chip gets so mad.)#he's so easy to rile up. it's irresistible
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Just had the funniest possible AU idea: Natsuyuu warrior cats AU where Natsume is a kittypet living with the Fujiwaras who keeps getting hassled by Natori and Matoba to join the clan cats in the area, because he's the child of Reiko, a stray who used to challenge everyone, cat or otherwise, to battle, and somehow always won. But Natsume wants none of that and just wants to enjoy his comfy bed and wet food in peace.
I haven't decided what the youkai would be yet, they'd either be the Spirits of other animals/cats that Natsume can connect with thru starclan bullshit, or just non cat animals that Reiko fought with. The second one is funnier but the first probably fits better with canon? But also I remember like nothing abt the warrior cats starclan Lore lol
Matoba is obviously the head of shadowclan (I considered changing the name but tbh shadow clan just works best either way) a strong but ruthless clan of cats that live in the area that banded together to defend against wild animals in the area. Maybe there's a bear or something in the area that has beef with them and keeps trying to attack the clan leader, and gave Matoba a scar on his eye?
Natori is the "head" of windclan, a clan that consists of him, sasago, urihime and hiiragi. Windclan used to be a big clan in the area, but got chased out by Shadowclan and retreated to being strays/kittypets. Natori is the child of a former windclan cat and a bougie purebreed showcat, and was never able to make it as a show animal because of a weird lizard shaped birthmark on his leg, so ran away to bring back windclan himself.
Natsume's highschool friends are just other kittypets in the neighbourhood he hangs out with. Tanuma is the cat of the local monk (he found him as a kitten under his porch), Taki and her brother are the pet cats of a local wealthy family, and her (cat) father was always interested in clan cats but could never meet them. Nishimura and Kitamoto are just average kittypets bought from a pet store.
Of course their names would all be different, I haven't decided on all of them but I think Natsume would be named 'Nutmeg', Tanuma would be 'Tuna' and Reiko would be 'Ghost' or 'the ghost'. Natori would call himself like. Sparklefur or something.
#natsume yuujinchou#yes I will probably end up drawing this but I wanted to type everything out first#natsume who's spent his whole life in and out of shelters and bad owners who finally has a real home#running into matoba who's like. don't you want freedom? the thrill of the hunt? power?#and natsume's just like no. leave me tf alone#I made the grandparents their parents for convenience also. I don't know if cats would keep track of lineages that long lol#anyway. can you tell I was very bored at work yesterday lol
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▪️if you ever need anything, please don't hesitate to ask someone else first.
#i'm finnally happy with this specific era of baby nick i think he may have started t already maybe been on for a couple of months he's havin#fun with acne again he is dying inside but happy#he's like 19 here and still lives at home he's in school trying to do something#stefans dragging him to the autoshop with him to work and he's slowly coming to the conclusion he hates this#he liked it better when he was younger and was just goofing around with his dad but now he gotta work like what#plus he gotta hide that he smokes sdfghjk#he's been smoking since he was 14 he wanted a deeper voice okay!#stefan is aware and his just disappointed like child no#on the note of t! its lowkey filling stefan with so much joy cause nick looks so much like him he's proud for some weird reason like look a#mini me. all of his work freinds are geeked for em and its an adjustment because they new him so long but they poke fun at him and treat em#the rookie he is#on the record though nicks great with cars just its boring#Spotify#ts4#simblr#sims 4#nicolas ishida#my sims
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I just had top surgery! And I'm taking the entire month of June off of work so I can recover, so you know what that means...
NANOWRIMO: JUNE EDITION
#i am already so bored and its been two days#i got home from the hospital yesterday and need something to stop me from trying to work#my staff have apparently been taking bets about how long it will take for me to try to do work stuff#and so I'm going to distract myself with NON work stuff: writing#i figure this is a good way to get decent progress on my three ongoing works#so. expect daily updates!
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i hate that this website has location based ads now like it's one thing to promote the local grocery store chain to me but i am seeing ads for my workplace now :/
#stop it......#i don't want to go back but this is the last sick day i can reasonably take#i probably should've gone back today but i told them when i was still feeling worse that i wasn't coming in.......#ohhhh i dread going in tomorrow so much. i don't even dislike this job i just hate being somewhere everyday#each day feeling its meaninglessness...... my meaninglessness in the space.......... the repetition and redundancy#selling people who don't need to be there things that they don't need#standing all day long just fucking bored#hoping that enough has happened since i've been gone that people can fill me in#ugggh because it's soooo boring but stressful to have to generate conversation with the same people every day#when nothing new ever happens#and i get sick of everybody even the people that i like and i don't really think anybody likes me that much either#i guess i felt this when i worked there part time but because i only had to be there part time it wasn't this constant gnawing feeling#and they didn't have me in the shop all the time....... this schedule is fucking killing me#i walk there i stand all day and i walk home#that's one of the reasons i haven't come back in yet - i was so dizzy and nauseous that the idea of standing all day was like.#i obviously can't fucking do that even if i would otherwise feel well enough to come in#if i had a sitting job then it wouldn't matter if i was a little dizzy#but getting back and forth to work and then standing for 8 hours. even when i'm feeling well it's kind of a lot#idk i guess i'm pretty unhappy with this job and where i am in life etc but i can't quit rn because what else would i do#there's literally job of this type that is going to pay as well and have good benefits#and i'm not qualified yet for the type of work i hope to do in the future#so i just gotta wait it out but it feels like. endless.#sigh anyway i'm just lazy lol#all this is to say. stop putting ads for my workplace on my dash lol i don't need to see all that
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been looking in tags for a few days now to see if anyone else found the whole high cloud quintet and related story to be a bit.....poorly written, nonsensical, contradictory, full of plot holes and loose ends, etc. apparently i'm not the only one. (and i'm not even talking about shipping stuff, because any time I saw someone mad about bad writing, someone always replies to be homophobic and laugh about failed ships. weirdos.) it could have been so good but was thrown into the garbage for the most part (IF you noticed all the plot holes and contradiction. if not, then it's a fine enough story tbh. I expect most people to see it on surface level and not read all the little hidden lore bits and try to piece it together like my autistic brain did. which is ok! enjoy it if you liked it and ignore me 😆)
#apparently one of the writers did it on purpose. wont explain here. you can find it elsewhere. but it makes sense now#that's why it fell apart and didnt make sense in the end#ive seem people say anyone mad about it is a shipper and thats why. they use it as an excuse to be homophobes#youre gross get out of thos fandom. im here as someone upset about the story who was very skeptical about any ship theories and focused#more on plot theories and overall friendship and stuff so its not even about shipping you het weirdos!!!#the contradictions and plot holes are bd regrdless of who you ship lmao stop reducing it to that#aure its fine if you ignlre those plot holes. but it happened to be the little plot holes that interested me the most so its obvious to me😅#cant wait until a talented writer in the fandom rewrites the whole story a lot better and fills in the holes and ties up the end better#please someone do this 😭#lee text#hsr#i just wanted a close found family who met a tragic end#my idea for a better way to write it is dan feng wanted free from the high elder cycle and yingxing helped him create a new elder#but it went wrong and failed because the preceptors fed him wrong info hopong it woukd destroy dan feng since they hated him#instead it was yingxing that died and dan feng selfishly brought him back somehow and thats why hes immortal and hates dan heng now#they created a monster in the process that made a mess and baiheng died trying to kill it maybe but hit its weak spot#so it was weaked enough for jingliu to slay it#maybe for a plot twist jing yuan somehow knew the preceptors were up to something and didnt stop the two because#they were too stubborn and he knew it would do nothing#we know the dragon heart disappeared so either it ended becoming bailu in the end#or it could be inaide blade bow. another fun possible plot twist. they never explained where it went so it coukd be a n y w h e r e#i had other ideas but i forget now. bht baiheng deserves better as well. just being a plot mechanism to make two dudes be stupid#is kinda bland and boring and wasted her character. she deserves better too!!!!#id write this if i had the time and brain power but ill hope someone else does it instead#OH yeah i forgot a big idea. dan feng and yingxing perhaps try to also kill the arbor and end the abundance and long life/reincarnation#and maybe that was one part that led to it all going wrong or something. since yingxing wanted revenge on the abundance for destroying#his home and family???? and dan feng wanted to escape the cycle? similar wants that worked together snd failed#these are all ideas from past theories i read and my own ideas i came up with all of which are better than what that bad writer did!#these are very incomplete ideas that im sure someone else can write better#lee rambles
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#usually i do really genuinely love my job#rn i'm mostly thinking about the things i could be doing instead of standing around here 'counting flies' as my boss likes to put it#i could finally vacuum. i could be cleaning the bathroom. do my reading for class. or - shocker! - work on fic!#usually i'd say fine i'll write on my phone#but i'm finally having motivation for the dad au again and because of being long and shit i only have that on my pc not in the cloud#hate everything rn wish i was home and could *do* something#there isn't any-fucking-one here why am i???#should ask my boss if i can take my reading to work and do it behind he counter when no one's coming#and she might allow it but my other boss absolutely wouldn't and unfortunately his decision is the final one.#to delete later#so bored i want to cry tbh
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i havent even read enough gl to justify the feelings and emotions i have about kyle i just have the lovers heart and also something wrong with me. and my projection. in my mind he's just like me. and he would have loved college vending machine frozen cheeseburger and heating it up in the microwave at 1 in the morning because he was bored and didn't want to work on a drawing assignment on 20" x 30" paper that was due tomorrow in his freshman year. he would have loved going to the club to push off finals work that's creating the worst stress known to man in his brain. and he would love to annoy the fuck out of his roommate when high and avoiding homework on a saturday.
#IN MY MIND HE'S JUST LIKE ME and i understand why he dropped out of art school also.#i need to get back to my readings but im too into thinking about the couple dozen issues i have read#and then going i wonder what he was like in college. and the answer is definitely fucking annoying.#if i knew him i know we would be not arguing in art history class. i would be saying his takes are stupid outside of class during break.#and he would go i dont know how somoene can defend british utilitarian furniture so vehemently and try to liken it to bauhaus design#our arguments would also stem from having very different art history and therefore philosophy education. his background would be from a pro#who would focus on european canon as per usual while my prof was coming from the perspective of someone with a phd in asian art history#and a curriculum based mostly around exploring and investigating non euro art work and how movements like modernism and#post modernism functioned in other continents.#this is such a main blog post but idont care. EVERYONE HAS TO KNOW HOW I PROJECT AND INTERACT WITH HIM IN MY MIND#he would also hate how i argue for art even i dont care about by approaching it at the philosophical angle.#'how do you like this it's barely even art. or it is art. but it's a boring cop out for suckers. honestly.'#'the thing is i dont like it. i just think you need to expand your world views and stop being close minded. youre limiting yourself.'#you might go eiffel what are you basing this on? the answer is vaguely remembered panels in my mind plus generally taste opinions of his i#can gleam from what art references they give him within issues.#it would also be funny bc like. he has a background in design... he's just stubborn and snobby i think when it then comes to the realm of#fine arts. i think his opinions and how they operate in regards to design + illustration + non gallery art are probably quite different#but i cant lie. from the singular 'i dont wanna be some loser who shows up with a blank canvas to a gallery' panel i remember someone talki#about in a post i have used it to create a variety of thoughts i think he could have had.#and the answer is the opinions of someone definitely a little annoying in art school. with a pretty standard traditional training#and background that stems from euo+american art history and sensibilities that inform how he interacts with art. which is very normal#but i think it's funny to view him as someone i would probably roll my eyes at for some comments he would be making.#and it gets funnier with how he acts generally as a person.#kyle you cant be this snobby when you are drawing pin ups of your work crush in your home studio...#good lord this got so long i have a problem. hi. sorry to my new follower your kyle posting made me go ha ha kyle. i like that guy.#static.soundz#back issues box#< it might as well go there bc i blabbed way too hard and too much. sorry. overtaken by an entity in my mind
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i have done everything to make myself as tired as possible so i can sleep as soon as my head hits the pillow but im wide awake😭
#i woke up early after sleeping late cause early class and long day no nap studied for like 3 hours after coming home and still im not slee#they're planning a trip at work to an amusement park and i need to find an excuse to not go cause#hanging out with them pretending to have fun is too socially draining on christmas too 3 hours of playing games and stuff#and suddenly im home changing my clothes and out of nowhere i started sobbing??? like girl what why??#idk i think it just feels very isolating and lonely😭#so i don't think i can survive a whole day picnic#but i can't tell dad that bc he'll just say to try harder i can't tell anyone really bc everyone thinks im just not Trying hard enough to#make friends😭#even moms like tera weird superiority complex hai sab aise hi hote hai kahan rehti hai tu#but the girls are all so boring and flat and un feminist#and the boys are so. perfectly marvari family guy i love my parents types😭😭😭#fit in nahi ho rha#ok anyway now that i got it off my chest i can sleep
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Okay okay, I usually hate posting selfies, but then again, I also love a little mild attention. So, to strike a balance, here are 4 recent ones, but I’m posting them at 2am so I don’t have to worry about bothering too many people. Yeah? Ok thanks I love you
#yes I know how time zones work… they’re fake. it’s night everywhere right now. duh.#sometimes a girl just wants to hear she’s pretty 🤷🏻♂️#I’m sorry I have a perpetual grumpy face. I don’t know what to do about that 🤷🏻♂️#god I’m bored. and lonely. and yearning. yeah…#I don’t want to get into that right now… ok I do but maybe let’s not do it in these tags#anyway I’m actually probably going to chop off most of my hair this weekend#I know I know. dudes cutting off long hair is a sin but also… it’s hot. my hair is heavy and gets gross easily#it’ll grow back soon enough but for now it needs to be razed#so what else what else…#this is my third night staying in the hospital while my mom is admitted#she’s doing better but I don’t really want to leave her here alone for too long#being stuck in bed feeling like shit all day gets lonely and tiresome so someone’s gotta hang with her#it’s not so bad on my part. I just sit in this chair all night on my phone and then eat breakfast in the cafeteria#easy peasy#I haven’t been home much in the past few days. just a few hours at time to nap and then head back#but it’s good. things are getting better#yup…#I guess that’s it… I don’t know what else to say#you can ignore this#take it sleazy#me#selfie#gross boy
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okay i'm struggling again
#she bork#tbd#idk i'll be fine life is just very mean and unfair and worst of all ordinary and dull. i go to work i come home i do nothing worthwhile.#weekends are never long enough and i never get to cram enough into them to enjoy myself. if life was mean but also generous and glamorous i#could maybe put up w it bc for every low there would be a high but it's not. it's just mean and you hit that low and then instead of it#being followed by a high you just end up on a plateau and eventually you hit another low. god i just don't think i was supposed to live in#this ordinary boring tedious life like i'm not made for it. not in a pretentious arrogant way but in a way that's like i'm going fucking#crazy like i have cabin fever but w my life rather than my environment (which tbh maybe they come down to one and the same). idk sometimes i#want to just blow up my life and go somewhere else and do something else and have fun and not feel so weighted down by responsibilities and#bills and worry about money specifically. like i was miserable in high school but now i think i look back on it fondly bc 1. no true#responsibilities or high stakes and/but 2. the stakes always FELT high like i was CONSTANTLY up and down and euphoric and depressed. not#healthy at all but it always felt like something was HAPPENING and now it just doesn't. i have always though that bored was the worst thing#to be and now here i am all the time it feels like. bored.#and again at the root of everything is that life is mean. mean mean mean. sometimes shit just HAPPENS that's bad and fucks you over and#there's nothing you can do about it. and again if there was something guaranteed to make up for it that would be fine but there's not. you#just have to recover and let it go and move on. and i'm not good at that
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Rewatching DS9 and VOY has just made me want to do episode rewrites but with the TOS crew. So what about Voyager s2 e25 Resolutions but with TOS mckirk or AOS spones. This is a kinda long post and just my random thoughts so heres a keep reading
So Jim and Bones are stuck on a planet while infected with some virus that doesn't effect them while on the surface. And the Enterprise then has to leave because of some reason. So Spock is left in charge like Tuvok was and has to deal with the fact that the Captain and CMO have been left behind and with the growing resentment towards him even though Kirk ordered them to leave.
Also like the idea of Bones being busy researching how to cure them while Jim quickly grows to enjoy the easy living and maybe for once in his life the ship isn't a burden on him. While bones is losing his mind because being stuck on a planet with nothing but researching this one cure is like Bones' worse nightmare. (like i know most people would think Bones would be like Chakotay but its my episode rewrite and i can do what i want). Also the idea of Jim wanting to build them a log cabin extension is very fun. Also since neither of them have any romantic attachments they actually do something about the romantic tension and then have to deal with that when they get back on the ship.
Though I'm not sure if they would have to ask for help from some enemy or Bones would just figure out a cure. Maybe Bones finds a cure and then isn't sure what to do since Jim seems so happy and he doesn't want to ruin that or maybe he thinks if they go back to the ship Jim will just pretend what happened on the planet didn't. And then a day later the ship comes back with a cure and he has to deal with the fact that he didn't instantly tell Jim about it. And of course Jim finds out and hes conflicted because he wants to be angry at Bones for not telling him right away but hes also angry that the cure was found at all so its a whole mess.
Or if it was AOS it would be Bones and Spock who are left behind mainly so it would mirror the fact that Janeway has a partner back home so spones just have awkward weird romantic tension. (not sure if this would have mckirk as well or just spuhura) Though in this version nothing would actually happen on the planet cos no cheating thanks, also not enough time would have past where they actually think theres no going back. Not sure either Spock or Bones would be like Chakotay, they'd both be super focused on finding a cure. They would also have to deal with this fallout on the ship but it would be in a very different way than TOS mckirk. Maybe if theres no mckirk it would end up with mccoy/spock/uhura in some configuration. Though if mckirk was already a couple it would stay the two different couples. lmao or maybe mckirk comes out of it since jim realised how much he actually missed Bones. i dont know this is post is turning into a mess
So its Jim and Nyota who have to deal with leaving the people they care most about behind. As i think there would be less resentment from the crew to deal with. I'm sure the med crew would miss their boss but they would have less power to make a fuss about it.
But theres still the fact that they're not as far away from starfleet as Voyager was and why the ship would leave but like why should that stop me?
I mean it could also just be AOS mckirk on the planet but for some reason i'm more drawn to the TOS version in this instance
#this post is dumb#mckirk#why do i think jim would be the one to “give up” well for one he cant actually help with the research#and he wants to want the simple life so i think he would get swept up in the idea of building a home away from it all#i dont think if they literally never got off the planet he would be happy long term but in the short term he would enjoy the hard work#also like could you imagine bones actually wanting to build a house by hand???!?!#If bones doesnt have doctoring to do he will get bored#im not taking any criticism on this /jk#also bones would be complaining the whole time and then jim builds him a bath to shut him up#though i dont think bones would have the subplot with the monkey#maybe theres some alien horses that jim gets attached to and he and bones go horse back riding#what is this turning into???#though the storm destroying all the work bones has done so he starts to come around to jim's thinking could work#you can see im more attached to the TOS verison#i do not think TOS spock would have a good time in this fic#but at least jim isnt in to much danger so he would only have to worry about the crew#and bones is with jim and hes the most annoying when jim isnt in charge so maybe it would be a better experience for him#also the crew wouldnt be going space mad so theres lots of things to consider#maybe i should actually write this
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Wip but you know what
I was initially SO bothered by this guy not having a nose or eyebrows but the more I make art with him I’m just like “oh thank fuck the little guy doesn’t have many facial features this is way easier than making Poppy or whoever else”
#Welcome Home#Welcome Home fanart#clay art#clay figures#clay figurines#clay sculpture#polymer clay#art wip#wip#ngl right now he looks like if ET dressed as Elvis Presley#I just need to finish his other foot and clean him up some and bake it#but it’s been fun to work with clay again!!#I feel like anyone who’s followed me for a while and maybe saw me post one or two things art wise#are now probably confused and concerned by the sheer amount of art I’ve produced in a short time#for a fandom I’ve just joined#however I fucking love these little guys’ designs and they translate so well into other mediums#it’s made me enjoy art again which honestly like#I’m sure it won’t be long before I’m bored again and I just stop making art for this fandom lol#but it’s been nice to give in and just sketch and doodle whatever and whoever#my art
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ohohoho boy update. today at work it was just us doing cheese while everyone else pulled an ice cream order, and i was like hey if youre not busy saturday would you want to roadtrip with me? and i fully expected him to say no, but we are roadtripping to nebraska on saturday <3 <3 anyway what playlist do i put on in the car. do we trust him enough for get loose get looser
#music wise. i think maybe take a walk in the sun or normal music. not sure about glgl yet#i will probably put him on aux for at least half of the trip#(and when i say trip i mean like. 6-7 hours round trip. like we're not going very far for very long)#we're leaving at like 2:45-3pm and i get sleepy around 10 so not like a super good road trip for me#i told him that the way i plan trips was usually a long drive based purely off vibes but i would try to have an actual plan this time#and i asked him what time he would want to be home for work the next day since he works at 6am#and god he was so cute he was like 'i'll call off work on sunday so you can do one of your usual trips'#and yeah. sighh i am down so bad#and i HAVE to promise to be normal on this trip. i always get weird in cars late at night.#but theres Implications of him being in my car like 100 miles from home. so i cant do or say anything weird#like could you imagine being in a car with someone you dont like and they start being weird. like what the fuck do you even do.#but anyway yeah good day. he was very talkative today. and he is so cute sometimes i cant stand it#work is really fun when theres 6 of us and i can stand there while the underclassmen do all the work#boy post#oh and he said he was going to message that he was streaming skyrim but it ended up being boring#so that revealed some info. 1) twitch streamer 2) did think about texting me at least once last week 3) trusts me to know about his twitch#ugh. i would love to just hurry all this up but i have to be patient i have toooo#okay! off to take a disease quiz and then study some ice cream#talk to you later tumblrinas
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Life is full of highs and lows
Negative: I wasn't feeling the vibe at the work christmas party so I left after half an hour without having any drinks (I arrived late due to finishing work later than everyone else and most people had already left)
Postitve: I got 3 drinks half-priced at the bottle-o on the way home (wasn't planning on buying them originally but a sale's a sale)
#ive been dreaming about pink gin and lemonade all day#but didnt feel like drinking at the party because i wasnt planning on staying long#so i decided to stop by the bottle shop on the way home and fulfil my dreams#i think at the last couple of work things I've had my work friends there but none of them were at this one so it was boring#one lady i absolutely adore was there but she left 10 minutes after i got there :(#and i missed out on a bathroom selfie with her 😭#personal
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