#Blushing Petals

[bebemoon]

look for the name AKHILA (requested by anonymous) | mirror palais "deity" semi-sheer asymmetrical top w/ attached scarf in petal pink, john galliano asymmetrical fluted hem light pink silk skirt, cult gaia "javiera" metallic raffia heeled sandal, amouage "ashore" eau de parfum (jasmine, ambergris, sandalwood, cardamom, turmeric), we dream in colour "blush jardiniere" earrings

[crustyfloor]

Brain vomit...I am insanely jealous of the people who can get the new merch. And I am planning an elaborate heist. But aside from that, I'm also crazy over the lore implications of the new photo-card designs...

Of course, they're all suffering as per usual. But it's symbolized by cracks in their skin. When I saw that, I immediately linked it back to the collapse of barriers, secrets, structures, etc. The hearts, however, confused me a bit. But I suppose it's because the reason they all "broke" is ultimately because of their love.

This is probably the most distressed Ivan has ever looked in a photo card, and really, he's honest. The tone of his card is sickeningly oversaturated and overwhelming, and his emotions are visceral, I also find it interesting how the cracks are littered all over his face, and the hearts leak out like that from the neck--and Ivan holds his face like he's trying to "fix" it, or in other words, "keep it together" as he's breaking down and becoming vulnerable, he has to cover up his expression behind something more appealing as he always does. He's also wearing his Anakt Garden uniform. When he was a child, he was just learning how to develop his mask. But even then, he faltered sometimes, Ivan's automatic response is always to try to fix it, even if he's underplaying the severity of his feelings, it's what he has to do regardless, I love his card for that portrayal when he tries to keep one wound closed, another wound opens, its erratic and uncontrollable, like his true emotions. When I see him trying, it looks like it's hard because, well--he's breaking down. Normally, you can't just bounce back from that, so in this rare moment, he struggles with how to deal with it. (A certain desperation to keep up the act?) (His eyes. I really like his eyes in this PC, it's more akin to those moments when his true expression comes out, in those very rare moments)

And then there's Till, I feel pain when my wife feels pain. His expression, too, is very overwhelming. Like he's suffocating too, But his cracks are minimal, not because his pain is small but because vulnerability--something he loathes, is coming to the surface. In tears, Till is suppressing his emotions. Who he bleeds for is ambiguous here, you could say the hearts are for Ivan or for Mizi, but I think it's both. Because he hides from the both of them and eventually the love he feels for them both seeps out one way or the other like a slow leak through a crack in the wall, he's spent so many years building a fortress of a barrier to emotionally separate himself from others, it's his way of protecting himself. But at the peak of his suffering, long too deep into this hell, losing Mizi and then Ivan, he's crying because he's slowly breaking down, and the way he grips at his hair like he's trying to hold back...urgh. In different ways, indifferently, Till ignores Ivan and his affections, and fearfully, he avoids Mizi, instead watching her from afar, doing small things to feel close to her, even when he has the opportunity to get closer, and even when she acknowledges that he's so avoidant of her that it makes Mizi concerned if he even likes her or not, as was said in the Artbook when asked for her opinion of him:

"Mizi -> Till: I'd love to be friends with him. He's an artist who's so dedicated to his work. But he seems to be avoiding me... Does he hate me?"

Till doesn't confront relationships any more than he has to even though he cares so so deeply for them because confronting his emotions and confronting vulnerability, sadness, happiness, etc., and especially fear, is a commitment you have to understand how to accept and respond to, and Till doesn't understand the how when he can only go back to his starting point, hiding and or getting angry, because it's easier. At this point, it's instinct. Shyness is one thing, but doubt is something that can make you freeze in place, confuse you, make you feel unsafe, and even hinder your ability to control yourself in the wake of fear. Fear is what roots Till in place. Till, even for how emotional and sensitive he truly is, he fears the type of vulnerability being emotional requires, he knows of it, but he can never truly embrace it out of fear, that's why he rarely ever shows his heart. He already knows that wearing your weakness on your sleeve leaves you vulnerable to pain, he used to be childish and vulnerable once, and technically, he still is, but just imagine what years upon years of cruelty has instilled in him. So he acts cold and avoidant, and these misunderstood emotions lead to other misguided intentions. That's what brings me to the quote on the back of his pc

Translation:

"사랑 같은 애매한 말보다 증오란 말이 확실해요" -> "The word hatred is more certain than vaguer words like love"

Rather than confronting uncertainty and exploring the confusing, unpredictable, and gray area that is love, hate is honest, hate is intentional, hate is malleable, and you can control it. It's Till's response to feeling unsafe to resort to anger, in the same way, Ivan resorts to trying to fix it and put on a facade. Again, it ties back to the fact that Till doesn't and has never hated Ivan, but understanding Ivan is as confusing as understanding love, Till is as much of a puzzle himself. That's why they confuse each other and clash. So they come close but remain distanced because their connection is almost like unattractive magnets, Till is sensitive and loving, compared to Ivan's regrets; of not being nicer, of not understanding how to get closer to Till, then I think about what Till's recollection of his relationship with Ivan and Mizi in retrospective would be like when he does acknowledge it.

And now...mmizisua. To me, Sua looks more aware of her pain than Mizi is, like in the storyline, she is more aware of their fragility and the cruelness of their environment. It's surely a parallel to the way Sua had kept Mizi in the dark for so many years, even when this pain and this love are so destructive, she covers up her wound with her hand and hides it from Mizi, to protect her, her wound is a direct correlation to her (inevitable) death, a truth that would shatter Mizi, even after he death she wants Mizi to remember her the same as she was when she was alive, unaffected by their world. She tries to force a smile as if everything is still okay, especially because she doesn't want to affect the way Mizi looks at her so lovingly, how would Mizi ever recover if she knew the truth?

And Mizi would seemingly be none the wiser if not for the tears because, to me, she knows but looks to Sua for comfort, to forget even when she is hurt the same way, I love this side of MiziSua a lot, the side that highlights the cruelty of their relationship that surrounds their bubble, because as long as they could distract themselves with the presence of each other, the co-dependence of their dynamic, they could forget as if they couldn't feel the pain at all as long as they had each other, but Mizi is still so affected by her pain, all this hiding had amounted to nothing in the end because Mizi never changes in Sua's eyes, and Sua is still hiding her pain, but that day, Sua had broken that bubble of ignorance to the evil around them. Mizi's cracking, and she shows Sua when she pulls back her hair. It's an interesting contrast between MiziSua and IvanTill, when Mizi and Sua smile, they look happy to be in love, even if it's twisted and hurts each other, because they only rely on each other, and Ivan and Till look inconsolably pained.

[her-penetrating-soul]

"Go inwards. Find your inner space, and suddenly, you will find an explosion of light, of beauty, of ecstasy -as if suddenly thousands of roses have blossomed within you and you are full of their fragrance."

~Osho

[adhd-coyote]

For your clone oc questions!

193rd - captain Badger 🖊️

212th - vent 🏷️

Corrie guard - blush 💕

91st - screech ✨

41st - Sargent flick 🗝️

327th - hotshot 🩸

404th - spooks 👻

Paws pirate crew - paws 🏷️

Runways - cabu 🥪

Siren squad - chitter ��

Petal squad - darling 💎

Freedom squad - crumbs 🃏

Others - crybaby 💖

Btw love all the names for you clones!! Very unique :3

And does crybaby need a hug? I won't hesitate to give him a hug.

🖊️ - Do they have/want any tattoos? Badger - He likely has a couple tattoos, but I haven't yet decided what they are. He is considering getting facial tattoos that match his Jedi's stripes, though.

🏷️ - How did they get their name? Vent - He's a vent gremlin! He Is In Your Walls

💕 - Do they have any significant others or crushes? Romantically? No. Sexually? Well... there's a reason they're named Blush. They are quite talented at making people's faces burn.

✨ - What were they like as a cadet? Screech - A little shit, to say the least. He got his name because once, when a trainer was yelling at him, he just pterodactyl screeched back at them. And now that screech is like. His whole thing.

🗝️ - How quick are they to trust? Flick - Not very. He's an uptight asshole who keeps everything close to his chest.

🩸 - What's the worst injury they've ever gotten? Hotshot - A pretty bad concussion that came from being too close to an explosion. Luckily, he healed up just fine, with minimal brain damage.

👻 - What's their worst fear? Spooks - Losing the vode close to him. Under Krell's leadership, you can never be sure when the last time you'll see your vode will be. Spooks has learned that several times over. He lost his whole squad to Krell.

🏷️ - How did they get their name? Paws - He has a tendency to knead blankets like a kitty <3

🥪 - What's their favorite food? Cabu - Any kind of noodles, honestly. But especially stir fry.

🎶 - What kind of music would/do they listen to? Chitter - Pop and Indie! Artist like Chappell Roan and AURORA would be his favorites.

💎 - What is most important to them? Darling - Their squad. She'd do anything to protect them.

🃏 - How good are they at sabacc and/or dejarik? Crumbs - He doesn't have much of a poker face, so he isn't the best at sabacc, and dejarik always makes him overthink and stress over his next moves. He prefers to just watch Condor play.

💖 - What is one of their best memories? Crybaby - It's a tie between teaching Artist how to tattoo, and any time spent with all of his riduure (a handful of other Alphas owned by my friends :3).

Clone trooper ask game

[inspiredlivingspaces]

IG housebeautiful

[heart-star]

Do you think that Bobby, after all the failed attempts of making Dogday know Crafty likes him due to his dense-ness, would lose patience and get angry at him or just make happen an accidental kiss?

Plus Catnap & Bobby having a stroll at night with someone watching them, can you guess who it is?

[nightcorekitten]

[jeremiahofphilo]

coughs for you

Neat, cool song! Not my usual genre, but it's a bit catchy!

[julunis14]

Guess who's gonna be on the news tomorrow morning >:3

Sunny, you're in denial >.>

[chihiro20]

[herbalnature]

A soft blush of Camellia 'Magnoliaeflora', adorned with rain's delicate kiss. This bloom whispers the beauty of a serene, rain-soaked garden.

[ktheqw]

Blossoms Blush

Blossoms colour the landscape, walking along to the sound of rain. Blossoms move and drip slowly, lost in the reverie of petal colour. Blossoms blush colourful shades as the raindrops playfully touch soft petals.

[her-penetrating-soul]

━━━━━━⚘ᥫ᭡​᭄∘˚დ━━━━━━

🤍 ‿"When was the last time you spent a quiet moment just doing nothing - just sitting and looking at the sea, or watching the wind blowing the tree limbs, or waves rippling on a pond, a flickering candle or children playing in the park?"⁀🤍

Ralph Marston

━━━━━━⚘ᥫ᭡​᭄∘˚დ━━━━━━

[hearts-on-the-drumset]

Revising, reading, and walking in the rain.

[fantastic-fr-scries]

Coatl Male

Honeydew / Peridot / Blush , Petals / Butterfly / Glimmer

Ice Common

[yisanged]

the plague doctor just blessed one of my employees. that was really scary