#Best Japanese Face Wash

[anielskaaniela]

Best Japanese Face Wash: An Honest Review to Help You Choose

In this guide, you will learn about the top Japanese face washes and how to choose the best one for your skin type. Check out my japanese beauty products [here]. When it comes to skincare, Japanese products have long been celebrated for their effectiveness and innovation. The Japanese beauty industry, known as J-beauty, emphasizes natural ingredients, cutting-edge technology, and time-tested…

[checosbluespring]

secrets we keep (pt1) → mv1

max verstappen x perez!fem reader

genre: one night stand, teammates sister, pregnancy

cw: 18+ MDNI, smut, oral (male receiving), p in v, slight spit play, dirty talk, mentions of pregnancy, pls let me know if i am forgetting anything

word count: 3.1k

song: too sweet - hozier

sidenote: hi everyone! finally a new fic is here and it's a max one! this is going to be a two parter, so keep an eye out for the next one! please let me know if y'all have any ideas or requests for a fic (I write for all drivers), also not beta read. hope you all enjoy <3

♡♡♡♡

The roars of the crowd were loud as Max crossed the finish line, followed closely by Sergio. For a second there you had thought your brother would overtake the world champion, but nonetheless he fought hard and gave the team what they wanted, a 1-2 finish. 

It wasn’t often you got to go to your brother's races, maybe only a handful a year but you were lucky to be able to get the time off to join your niece and nephews for the Japanese Grand Prix. Sergio would topple over if he knew you had the hots for his teammate. Every time you have met with Max, it’s been very cordial. Polite hellos, asking how life in Mexico is, what you have been up to since he last saw you. 

A part of you wondered why he was so timid with you. Was it because of Sergio? Being the baby of the family left him feeling protective of you, but you don’t think that would affect how Max interacted with you. I mean you barely saw him. 

Watching the pair on the podium set tears in your eyes. You were extremely proud of your big brother and his teammate. 

Your dad absolutely adored max and had invited him to join us for a celebratory dinner after the race. Which to your surprise he happily accepted. 

You were staying at the same hotel that both the bulls were at, so reconnecting for dinner would not be difficult. After the race you decided to head back to freshen up and change your clothes into something a little more fancy. At the race you were wearing a white tennis skirt with a red bull polo tucked in. For dinner you decided to wear a  black  over the shoulder dress that fit you perfectly. Finally ready you walk down and see that only Max is waiting in the lobby. Your stomach turns at the thought of being alone with him.

Picking his head up from looking down at his phone he notices you walking toward him and waves shyly. “Hi y/n, looks like it’s only us ready” he said in a tiny voice. You are always so used to him being outspoken it kinda scares you a little. “hi maxie, you know how my family is with time management, they should be down here soon” you said with a laugh, not even acknowledging the nickname that slipped from your mouth. 

A sudden tinge of pink washes over Max’s cheeks and you feel heat radiating up your neck. Act cool, you keep telling yourself but you are so nervous. Max was all you ever wanted in a guy. Handsome, sweet, confident, the list could go on. You knew deep down though your worlds would never clash well. You lived in Mexico with your parents - working as a teacher. Max lived in Monaco and raced for one of the best teams in formula one history, surrounded by models throwing themselves at him. You couldn’t blame them, you would do the same, if you thought you ever had a chance. 

“No worries, I always have to wait for Checo to come to our team meetings” he laughed. “I bet, if there’s one thing my brother isn’t know for it’s being on time, thank you for coming to dinner with us though, we really appreciate it, I know my dad and brother do a lot”

With a smirk on his face something shifts “oh just your dad and brother, not you?”. You feel the breath knocked out of your lungs, just as you are about to open your mouth to respond, tiny roars make notice in the room and you almost fall at your nephew running to you, so you could pick him up. Silently you thank your nephew for the interruption. 

Dinner goes smoothly. You sat at the opposite end of the table with the kids, while your brother, dad, and max were deep in conversation. You swore that Max kept looking at you though, sneaking glances. 

As the check gets situated, all of you make your way out onto the busy streets of Japan. You hear your brother speak up “Y/N are you gonna come get ice cream with us” and while you were deeply contemplating it, you decided to pass up the offer and head back to the hotel. 

“No I think I'm gonna head back to the hotel and pack, I want to take the kids to get breakfast tomorrow morning before we leave” you say.

“no puedes caminar solo es tarde en la noche” (you can't walk alone, it's late at night) your brother worries. 

“Sergio, I'm fine, it's not that far from the hotel, I'll grab a taxi” before he could protest, Max jumped in.

“I can take a taxi back with y/n, I'm super tired after the race, and I'll make sure she makes it to her hotel room” 

“Are you sure Max?” Sergio asks.

“Yes I'm sure, it was a lovely evening, thank you for inviting me” 

Your family bids their farewells and walks away, leaving just the two of you waiting for a taxi. As you guys are picked up, you both don't say a word in the car, sitting in an uncomfortable silence. Max pays the driver and you thank him quietly. Making your way up to the floor where both of your rooms are, you stop at his first. “Thank you for bringing me back Max, I appreciate it” 

“Of course it's no problem, hey I'm actually not really that tired, do you wanna play Fifa or watch a movie?” he asks. Something deep down is telling you to decline. Spending time with him is just going to dig you deeper in a hole with how you feel about him, nonetheless, you can't let this opportunity go and accept this offer. 

Walking in you notice the room is ten times bigger than yours, with a balcony and jacuzzi tub in the middle of the bathroom. Max must notice your awe because he says “I don't know why they give us such big rooms, we are hardly ever even in here”

“Haha it's nice for Checo because the kids get to play around” 

“You are really close with them, aren't you?”

“They are practically my own, when their mom is out doing business I usually keep them, I also help homeschool them” 

“Well that's very sweet of you” he says while taking a seat on the bed, while motioning you to do the same.

“Do you want something to drink” he offers

“No I'm okay” you politely decline. You still can't believe this, you are in Max Verstappen's room all alone. 

“Okay let's put on a movie! What are you up for, should we do action” you sense a sudden shift in his mood, you can't quite place it, maybe excitement. You believe he can probably sense that you are nervous. The mention of action makes your ears perk up.“Can we please watch fast and the furious, I am on a mission to have all my friends watch it”

Max doesn't protest, just laughs quietly and nods, setting the movie in place. You make yourself comfortable and take off your big hoop earrings and heels- even though they werent big by any means they still hurt you. Once you are back in bed with him, you notice him looking at you.

“Is there something on my face?” You laugh

“No i just guess I never noticed how different but similar you look from checo”

“Really? How so?” You question

“Well for one, you are very pretty, but you have the same freckles that Checo does covering your cheeks and nose” Max’s comment has you feeling shy, you know you must be sporting a prominent blush across your face and neck. 

“well thank you Max, it's funny because growing up, i never had freckles, but i think being out in the sun for races and the kids karting tournaments have really brought them to surface” 

“That's interesting, I admire how close to your family you are, something I wish I had” he says so quietly you almost miss it. You don't know what possesses you to do this but you place your hand over his and say “you are always welcome in this family max, we all love you, and no matter where sergio goes next year- you will always be welcomed with open arms” 

He stares at you with a blank face- unable to tell what he's thinking you begin to think that was the wrong thing to say when suddenly he leans down a plants a gentle kiss over your lips. You gasp at the touch. Max pulls back with wide eyes and says “shit I shouldn't have done that, Checo will kill me if he found out”. Instead of agreeing with him, you keep your hand held tightly over his and whisper “he doesn't have to know”. That's all it seems to take for max to lean back in and start kissing you. 

You grab the front of his shirt, gripping the fabric in your hands. His palm cups your jaw, slowly deepening the kiss. Once his tongue makes his way in, you let out a quiet moan. 

Grabbing your hips, Max shifts your position so that you are laying on the bed while he towers over you. “You are so pretty y/n, been wanting to do this forever” he says while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. While you want to pour your heart out, your nerves stop you and all you can do is nod and say “want you so bad max”. 

He continues to kiss you, tracing his mouth up and down your neck and along the junction between your shoulder and neck placing feather-like kisses. There’s nothing more that you want then for him to leave a big bruise plastered for everyone to see but you knew that wasn’t possible. 

You grab his head and place your lips back on his. Moving his hand to your hair he grips it tightly, keeping you in his control. Slowly he rocks his hips down to meet yours, creating a union of moans to spill from the both of you. This must be the breaking point for max because he stops to take off his shirt and grabs your dress to do the same. Not before asking “is this okay”. 

“Of course it’s okay, I want all of you” you whisper out. His pants also come off in the process. Both of you left in your underwear. You could feel yourself soaked through your panties. Max moves his hand so that his thumb is slowly running along your slit through the fabric. A moan is pushed out of you with a quiet plea of more. 

Growing impatient you tug the straps of your bra down your shoulders exposing your breasts to him. This catches his attention because Max is on them immediately. Sucking and kissing them, basically worshiping them. “Fuck, these tits are perfect. They were practically popping out of your dress earlier, wanted to take you to the bathroom at the restaurant and just suck on them for hours” 

You would have never guessed Max to be into dirty talk but it’s a pleasant surprise. “I want you in me Max, please, I’ve been waiting for this” 

“How can I deny such a pretty girl? '' With that being said, Max gets up and walks to his bag to pull out what seems to be a condom. While he’s doing that, you shimmy your underwear down your legs and throw it somewhere in the room. Before he approaches the bed, Max takes his underwear off and you see his cock spring free. Your mouth instantly waters at the sight. He’s big, just like you thought he would be. Pale and veiny. Pink and wet at the tip.

You wanted him in you but not before you got a taste of him. You motion him up towards your mouth, so that his legs are on both sides of your shoulders. “I want to taste you, can I Max?” You said hoping your voice and eyes truly show the desire you have burning for him. 

“Go ahead sweetie, suck me off”

That’s all you needed to hear before taking the tip in your mouth, lightly sucking. Max groans at the sensation and places a hand behind your head for support. Popping yourself off the tip, you lick a long strip under his shaft, following the prominent vein that lies there. You place feather-like kisses on the head hoping to tease him. As you look up at him, you see his mouth slightly agape, eyes stuck on you. “Don't tease me baby, c'mon”.

You start to bob your head, up and down, making sure you move your tongue back and forth. You palm at his balls and hear a hiss, thinking he must be sensitive. 

“Fuck, you suck me off so good, this mouth was made for me, wasn't it y/n” 

You whimper at the words and try to push yourself further down his cock. Grabbing your head, he pulls you off and says “I need to get in you”. 

You nod your head fast and practically beg “please Max, please want you in me”.

As he positioned himself between your legs, he's looking directly at your core, you start to feel a bit insecure and try to close your legs, but he uses both his to keep them open. “You have such a pretty pussy, want to absolutely devour it” what he does next has you almost combust. He hovers his mouth over your core and lets a string of spit come done to coat you. Taking his index and middle finger he holds you open and lets another drop of spit fall on you. You are moaning so loud, you place your hand over your mouth to try and keep yourself quiet. 

Max places two fingers in you while simultaneously rubbing slow circles over your clit. You are desperate for him to get in you. “Max I'm good, you can get in me”.

That's all he needs to hear before he puts his condom on and sinks into you. The burn is unlike anything you have felt before. You were definitely not used to his size but the stretch was addicting. As he builds up pace, you place your hands over his back, your fingernails gripping onto his shoulders, it feels so so good. “Faster” you whisper. Max listens. You could already feel the coil in your stomach about to snap, what pushes you over the edge is Max’s dirty talk. “You wrap around me so good, best pussy I've ever had, what would people think if they saw my roommate's sister coming all over my cock” you can't respond, all you can do is moan.

Finally catching your breath you say “you feel so good Max, you are gonna make me cum” and you tuck your head into his neck licking a fat stripe near his Adams apple. “I'm gonna come too, come with me y/n”.

The next couple of minutes go by in a blur, you feel yourself clenching on his cock, cumming while he pumps in and out of you with his hand rubbing at your clit. He kisses you hard as he groans into your mouth. “Fuck that was good” he states and all you can do is nod. 

Max takes off his condom, and goes to the bathroom, returning in his underwear, with a warm washcloth. You feel embarrassed but you let him clean you up. You are left undressed so you ask if he could hand you your dress. The room is filled with an awkward tension. Max can tell because he lays down on the bed and pats it for you to lay with him. 

You feel like you should decline and be on your way, not wanting to overstay your welcome. But you genuinely don't think this will ever happen again and want to cherish what little time you have in the same proximity.  You lay with your head on his chest and his arm thrown over you with the tv playing in the background. Time passes quickly and within 30 minutes you hear soft snores coming out of max. You take this as your cue to leave. You slip yourself away and gather your belongings. Taking one last glance at him you smile and quietly make your way out of the room. 

You don't have a lot of time to reflect once you get back to your room because you have to shower, and pack for your flight in the morning. You don't know if you and Max will ever reconnect like that, but you are grateful for the time you shared. 

You don't see or hear from Max before you leave Japan, but maybe it's for the best. Your brother didn't expect anything and you are determined to keep it that way. 

The first couple of weeks back in Mexico were rough, slowly recovering from your trip. Around 6 weeks after being home and two more grand prix taking place, you feel sick, like a stomach bug has really knocked you down. It was so bad that you weren't able to go to the Miami gp like you wanted. 

Deciding it has been lingering for far too long you decide to go to the doctor. The first thing they ask you is if it's possible if you are pregnant. Your first thought is no, but you remember you and Max had hooked up around two months ago. You feel a pit in your stomach and your heart rate speeds up. You couldn't be right, he wore a condom, and you hadn't had sex for like a year prior to that. 

After you take your pee test, you have never been more scared or felt more alone. You want your mom here. After what felt like an eternity, the doctor came in with a smile and sat down. “Congratulations y/n you are pregnant”. The world came to a stand still and all you can do is cry. 

Because how in the hell are you going to tell your brother you are pregnant with his teammate's baby. How are you going to tell Max that you are pregnant? 

Simple. You won't. 

[russellsppttemplates]

Fighting a losing battle (Lando Norris)

Even though Lando would never lash out, he didn't feel great after the race and he needed someone to be there for him

Note: english is not my first language. Another example of how whenever I see something I enjoy, I hyperfixate on it and I don't put it down until I get it done and how saying no is hard for me! Jokes aside, hopefully you enjoy it!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: japanese grand prix '24

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3

Everyone expected the qualifying sessions to be tougher, but the MCL38 showed pace as Lando did beautifully going from Q1 to Q3,

The spirits were high in the garage as they congratulated eachother, some of the mechanics from Lando's side even flashing you two big thumbs up as they carried on what they needed to do to get the car back and prepare it for race day.

"I got P3!", Lando gave you a big smile that made his eyes squinty as he walked closer to you, having finished his media duties outside of the ones the social media team needed.

"Congratulations, baby! Only two tenths off of the RedBulls!", you cheered, wrapping your arms around his neck in a hug before kissing his lips.

"The pace is kind of there, and the weather for tomorrow looks nice, too, should be a good race!", he smiled, kissing your forehead one last time before he pulled you two apart, "are you good to wait here for me? The debrief should be long, but not gigantic".

"Yes, I'll wait here, go before they come for me and never let me be here again", you squeezed his hand before he let go, blowing you a kiss as he walked to the meeting room.

After the debrief, you went straight to a small dinner to celebrate Oscar's birthday and then back to the hotel, "would you perhaps want to shower with me?", you mused as Lando set his backpack in one of the chairs, "yes, sounds great", he smirked as he followed you into the bathroom.

You both peeled away all the clothes on your bodies, Lando doing it faster than you and turning on the water so it would warm up, "baby, you're so gorgeous", he groaned, taking your hand when you took off your panties and pulling you to him, his hands grasping your hips.

Lando couldn't take his eyes away from your body, whispering "I can't believe you're all mine" in your ear while squeezing your thighs, lightly tapping your butt and feeling your body jiggle from the small impact, "I love you, baby".

"I love you too, Lan", you let your fingers trail all the way from his damp curls to his chest, following the delicate lines and kissing his wet chest.

"Can I wash your hair?", he asked as he got the bottle from the indented shelf on the wall, letting you turn around and getting a full on view from your butt, sighing as he lathered the product on your hair.

Neither of you stepped inside the shower with a full on shower sex moment in mind, feeling satisfied with just spending intimate time together and caressing eachother's bodies to show how much you appreciated eachother.

"I want to wash your back", you claimed, Lando turning around this time and letting your rub his skin, delicate fingers untangling some knots and relieving pressure on his muscles before he felt your lips littering kisses everywhere you could reach. Any other time, he would joke about your infatuation for his back and how you seemed to prefer the part of his body that didn't show his face, but right now he was enjoying this as much as you were.

"Careful, don't slip", Lando encouraged you as he wrapped the towell around you after he did the same to himself, holding your hand as you stepped out and into the bedroom, changing in your sleeping attire, so shorts for him and a nightshirt for you.

You brushed your teeth together and did your skincare routine, kissing Lando's lips before putting on your lip balm.

Lando spooned you on the bed, tucking you in properly and kissing your cheek, "Good night, my love, sleep tight", he whispered as you softly snored away for the night.

You certainly weren't the point person any team would go to have opinion on any engineering or performance matters for the cars, but you weren't a stranger to it either.

The red flag at the beggining of the race definitely opened the possibility for tyre changes, but the team seemed happy with how they were running.

After the restart, everyone recognised the efforts Lando was making to hold his P3, Jon exchanging a few words with you every now and again, going as far as pointing out how long Charles' stint was to with those tyres, "He's loosing grip, though", you pointed out.

When you heard the request for Lando to come to the pits, you scrunched up your face for good. It didn't feel right and, even though you didn't have the data in front of you, their explanation on the radio didn't make too much sense, "George will get in front at the pit lane exit", you groaned as you watched it happen on the screen.

Lando kept mostly quiet until the end of the race, and whenever he spoke, both you and Jon noticed the bitterness in his voice, exchanging a look with you this time.

At the end, Charles climbed up to fourth place and after a few brilliant overtakes from your boyfriend, he ended up in P5.

As he dropped two places, your heart sank, realising that the team's strategy really didn't work well and that the looks you exchanged with your boyfriend's trainer definitely had some reason to it.

Lando went on for his media duties, politely answering all the questions and refusing to engage in the ones where the reporters mentioned a potential mistake from the team and wanted to perhaps get a more efusive reaction from him.

As Lando walked closer to the garage, you could feel an antsy aura around it, quickly dissipating as he smiled and thanked them for their work and efforts, mentioning the debrief and how they would discuss it then.

You set the headphones back in their place and leaned against the wall on the corridor to the driver's rooms, not wanting to be in the way as everyone tidied, organised and got ready for the work they still had ahead.

Lando walked by you, squeezing your waist and kissing your forehead, "I'm going to change for the debrief, then we need to record the wrap up video of the weekend and then we can go to the hotel, okay?", he checked with you.

"Of course, I'm not in a rush, love", you smiled, kissing his cheek and squeezing his hand in yours for a bit.

Patting Oscar's back as he passed by you, you found a spot in the lounge where you could hang out, overlooking the track while reading your book when your phone beeped with a text from Adam.

From Adam

Hey, Y/N!

I'm sure Lando is in debrief now - we dropped him a text -, but we just wanted to know how he is doing after that race!

Love, Adam and Cisca

The fact that his parents trusted your enough to send that message was enough to warm your heart, quickly typing a reply so they wouldn't get worried.

To Adam

Hello! I guess it's good morning for you 😊

Yes, and I think this is going to be a long one! He's okay, not showing much, you know how he is - if he let's me, I'll get more information out of him!

From Adam

Yes, early wake up call today for us!

We're glad you're there with him, definitely eases our worries 🤗

Smiling at the text, you couldn't help but agree. You knew Lando well enough to the point where you knew where his mind was taking him - dating for almost four years did that to a couple -, so you were happy that maybe you could be a sounding voice when it was just the two of you.

"Video is filmed - I have my shoes on now -", Lando offered and you quirked a brow at him, "so we can go, I'll just tell Jon since he's riding with us", he smiled, kissing the top of your head before you got up, grabbing your cardigan from his driver's room and bidding goodbye to everyone.

As you were being driven back to the hotel, Lando sat next to you while Jon was sitting facing you two, you let your fingers walk along your boyfriend's thigh until it found his hand, touching it with your pinky to begin with and test the waters. Lando reacted quickly, lacing your hands together and giving them a squeeze while looking at your eyes as a silent thank you, a tight lipped smile playing on his lips.

"Tomorrow's flight is quite early, so we'll just meet here and then head to the airport then?", Jon checked with Lando.

"Yes, I'll send you the details", the McLaren driver retrieved his phone from his pocket, tapping the screen as he confirmed the details of the flight.

"Have a good night then, see you tomorrow!", Jon said as he waved, getting inside his room before you and Lando made your way to the one you spent the last couple of nights in.

Lando went straight to the bathroom, feeling bad for needing to be on his own for a bit. You had been there for him for all the highs and the lows and he recognised the voice in his head saying he didn't deserve your support was probably lying to him. Still, he quickly showered alone and got out of the bathroom, a white towell hanging low on his hips as he looked for his shorts and underwear in his suitcase, putting them on and scrunching up his curls with the towell in an attempt of drying the locks while giving them some shape.

After placing the towels back in the bathroom, he got back to the room and looked at you, making you stretch your arms so he could lay his head on your chest and cuddle himself against your body.

"Hey, I love you and I'm proud of you", you said, wanting to push the subject but not wanting to do something he didn't want to.

"Will you still love me if I never get on the podium again?", he asked, half joking but also half speaking his true thoughts.

"Lando, I'll love you regardless of whether or not you stand on the podium or anything like that", you stated, "a year ago, P5 and P8 would've been a good result for McLaren and this weekend, a series of events can explain most of what happened for that - the development they have done and have been working on will pay off".

"We didn't bring anything new and still managed to be the third fastest car on the grid", Lando agreed with you, "but it's like I'm fighting a losing battle. RedBull are in their own league and Ferrari brought big, positive changes - it's everything from the speed, to how long they can go for, how longs they can stretch their stints and so on", he sighed, "I can't do much more than what I'm doing, can I?", he mused.

"You got the maximum points you could get considering where your car stands compared to the others, Lando, you did the best you could", you comforted.

"We spoke about it in the debrief and we all learned with it, it seems", he commented, "and overall, that was the most we could do".

"It was, and I'm so proud of you, your fans are proud of you, the team are proud of you, your parents are proud of you - have you texted them back?", you questioned.

"How did you know they texted me?", he raised his eyebrows in question. They always called him after a race, so it wasn't like you knew it out of habit.

"Your father texted me asking how you were - they were a little worried, too", you noted.

"I'm surprised mum didn't call you straight away - she's not shy on telling her children in-law how much she loves them, but I swear every time she talks about you, it's like you've been one of our own forever, which is only a matter of time realistically", Lando said, not thinking much about it until the words sunk in, "what I meant was that she always says you're really good for me and that I'm really lucky to have you - which I agree with - and I was-", he rambled on and you were sure he wouldn't shut up unless you stopped him.

Kissing his lips once he shifted enough and looked up at you, you cupped his face, "I lived hearing that", you mumbled.

"Good, that's good", he assured, "but yes, I texted them back and I called after we filmed the video - mum told me to give you a kiss on her behalf", he smirked.

"I haven't received such kiss", you pretended to wonder, looking around the room, "maybe I need to go and get that kiss from someone el-", this time you were the one interrupted with a bunch of kisses being pressed all the way from your forehead to your chin, stopping on your lips a couple of times before Lando settled his chin back above your sternum.

"I have no idea what I did to deserve you in my life", Lando mused, a smile playing on his lips as his hands crawled under your t-shirt and squeezed your tummy and waist softly, "but I'm glad you're here, with me", landing his head back in your chest, "I love you".

"Is that comfy?", you giggled, "your boobs? Always! They're the best, baby", he smiled, seeming a little more positive from the initial assessment you did on his mood earlier.

[fernandopiastri28]

you love me (i really do) ~ lando norris

~ part 1 ~

warnings: drinking, angst

Everything came back to her now about that night in a flash, the night Lando got a podium in Singapore. It had seemed like a blur in the moment, since the celebration had been so quickly swallowed up by endless shots, blaring music, too much touching, and the way Lando’s touch felt hot and heavy all over her.

He’d wanted to celebrate it, that’s obviously why he was crazy drunk- his eyes bright with the sort of excitement only a champion had. He’d been so happy, soaking up every moment of attention that blared on him. Sure, Carlos had won the race, but Lando had been enjoying each second like he was the one taking home the first place trophy.  

The photos and videos seemed endless. There was him getting out of the car, his toothy grin, the way his face lit up in pride as he raised the trophy high above his head. Each scroll past the photos felt like more of her restraint being chipped away at her body.

Her situation had become so direly drastic to the one she’d found herself deep within only a matter of hours ago. Her surroundings went from the blinding neon lights of the club, to the sudden dim shade as her head remained buried under layers of thick blankets. Her neck craned at an uncomfortable angle to look at her phone screen as her thumb idly swiped through twitter. It seemed like a bad dream, a bad hangover at that- all regret with all good memories just narrowly out of reach.

Seemingly, the whole platform had been going crazy over the ‘CarLando’ podium. The memory of seeing it first hand was beyond hazy for her, but seeing the photos now- it must’ve been the best of his career. Standing on the second step next to his best friend, champagne coated his face in a glimmering sheen under the luminous night light celebrations. 

Each new piece of media that appeared on her timeline caused her resolve to falter slightly more, being steadily replaced with the desire to bombard his phone with strings of apology texts. She shouldn’t have walked out on him, she shouldn’t have left without an apology, she shouldn't have ignored the three times he’d tried to call her presumably just after he’d woken up in an empty bed.

But she also shouldn’t have slept with him.

He was her best friend and not even a day ago, he was on top of her, all over her, inside her. Who’s to say when he did it with her would’ve been different? It was likely the exact same as every other time for him- have a good race (sometimes even if it had been a shitty one), get drinks, wait for a flock of attention from girls, give the most basic of compliments, ‘ you have beautiful eyes,’, ‘you’re fucking gorgeous in that dress,’, and wait for them to fall to their knees for him- literally.

Maybe it would wash over, maybe he’d be fine by the Japanese grand prix, Qatar at the least. He’d be fine, he always was. He somehow managed to consistently pick himself back up after each bad race, getting over a one night stand would be much easier than that.

Right?

Japan was the race directly after Singapore, and she didn’t attend. Lando wasn’t going to miss her, she’s pretty sure of that. After the initial few calls he’d attempted to make to her the morning she left him in the hotel, he’d gone seemingly radio silent. He was posting regularly on instagram, liking stupidly immature tweets, even hinting towards big upcoming projects for quadrant. He was.. normal. Unaffected clearly.

She took a flight to Australia, reckoning it was just about the safest place she could escape from Lando. The Australian grand prix was way back at the beginning of the year, and unlike his teammate, this wasn’t even his home, and he had no reason to go there.

She could camp out here for as long as she pleased- or at least until the middle of march when the 2024 Australian grand prix would be taking place. From the 24 of september until the 20 of march (give or take a few days), she had just about 6 months to sort herself the fuck up with him, or just escape somewhere else.

Trying to ignore all the information and blast of new media as the Qatar grand prix approached was near unignorable. McLaren was clearly confident about the track, and they believed that even under the unideal conditions of the track and the surrounding environment, that the cars were designed to fit each aspect of the Lusail Circuit.

And she wasn’t necessarily purposefully ignoring anything Lando related- in actuality she sometimes found her fingers hovering over a new interview of his. It was refreshing to see him happy, looking a whole lot better than she’d been feeling the last few days. So when her calendar pings as a reminder that qualifying was happening at 7 am, despite the stupid hour she’d need to be awake for it- she watched it anyways. 

Lando narrowly ended in 10th after his lap times were deleted. Oscar suffered the same fate, but still had the advantage of being 3 places ahead of his senior teammate for the sprint shootout. Unfortunately he suffered again in the sprint shootout, Oscar starting in pole position while he came narrowly behind in second. Considerably an impressive feat, but for someone who wasn’t satisfied if he was not very first- Lando couldn’t have seemed more disappointed.

The sprint was worse for him afterwards, dropping from 1st to 2nd as Max took his spot. Oscar retained his pole, keeping his pace throughout the whole race to eventually take home his first win (even if ‘ it wasn’t a real race’) as a rookie. Lando, once again, was not thrilled. After being in the sport for 5 years, he was still chasing the high that would accompany a win.

On the day of the actual race, Lando performed only slightly worse than Oscar- the two of them securing the second ‘McPodium’ of the season with Oscar on the second step and Lando in third. Beneath the sheer exhaustion, near matching grins spreaded across both of their faces as they proudly held up their trophies. There was no doubt that Lando would every let the fact that his rookie teammate got win before he did- that much was evident in all the post race interviews. 

There were certainly moments where she contemplated sending him a message, congratulating him on another podium to add to his collection. It did feel wrong though, appearing again out of nowhere when he achieved something notable. She didn’t want to come across that she’d only be there for him when he was successful. In actuality, she really just wanted to be back in his life. Surely a week without contact wouldn’t end the multi-year friendship they had.

But after all, a lot can happen in one night. Maybe Lando would gradually just turn into a distant memory of hers- somebody that she once knew.

At COTA, Lando secured his fourth podium in a row. He’d gotten 2nd in Singapore, 2nd in Japan, 3rd in Qatar, and back up to 2nd in America. This time, Oscar doesn’t join him on the podium, Lewis does instead. Two multi world champions- one a recent 3 time champion, the other with 7 titles- and Lando right there next to them. He’d be next, she was sure he would be.

It’s quite the sight, the three men stood up on their respective steps. Lewis- the past of formula one. The man who ruled the sport for years, taking home win after win. Only challenged by the very race winner of Max Verstappen. He was the face of formula one for the time being, and likely could be for the following few years. There were only a few talents in the sport who had the potential to fight Max for those future titles- and Lando was certainly one of them. He had a good car, a teammate who could challenge and push him to be a better driver, he had the determination- the drive to win.

Mexico wasn’t anything to write home about. She tried to not watch it, getting an icky feeling each time she saw Lando on screen because the only place her mind would go to was how sweet his mouth tasted. It seemed that the only thoughts that would flood her brain each time she saw anything related to him, her body went into a sort of remembering state when all she could think about was how she’d felt that night. He ended in 5th, so maybe she should’ve just not watched the race. His face was hardly shown beyond a clip of him just before getting onto the car, and then in the post race interviews. At least she didn’t stay up all night thinking about it.

Brazil on the other hand was a race worth watching- Max in 1st, Lando in 2nd, Fernando in 3rd. The gap between Alonso and Norris is insane, especially given Fernando was a 2 time world champion with more than 20 years of experience. He’d be next, she knew it. He’ll be a world champion soon, and her only wish was that she’d be smart enough and brave enough to reach out with congratulations. She also hoped that he’d be happy to receive one from her.

Notably the worst race of the season is Las Vegas, given that Lando crashed on Lap 3. He slammed straight into a barrier, his car almost flinging backward with the power of hitting a wall at 180mph. It was the only race she didn’t want, but hearing about it afterwards sent a cold sweat down her back. A sharp inhale filled her lungs and her hand stayed attached over her gaping mouth. She didn’t check how bad the crash was initially, and wad glad when she heard he was out without any injuries.

Finally, the season finale in Abu Dhabi occurred. After such an intense season (that she’d shamefully tuned in for more than she would’ve liked to admit post Singapore), it was almost a relief when the race ended, because of the realisation that she wouldn’t have to hear about Lando for a few months, until preseason testing at least. 

With the slight friendship (and possibly to be further blossoming) she’d managed to accumulate with Oscar, she’d found out the Brit was basically doing a world tour over the winter holiday. Places such as Bali and Vietnam, then all the way over to Finland- or an adjacent. She’d be safe, the only two drivers who would be in the same continent as her would be the two actual Australian drivers- Liam in New Zealand if he counted in the f1 drivers realm.

So she took the few weeks she had off of work- which wasn’t ever really solid as it seemed her career was all over the place, she took those solid-off holiday weeks to venture out to familiarise herself better with Australia. Sydney- she knew well, Brisbane maybe even more so. Melbourne the most due to attending the grand prix there every year for the past 6 seasons. But in all her time spent in Australia, she’d never truly gotten around to exploring Western Australia.

So she did what any right minded person visiting Perth who had connections to F1 would do- she reached out to Daniel and asked for any recommendations for her holiday. But instead of simply giving her a list of places to eat, shops to visit, sights to see, he straight up invites her to spend a week at his farm.

Yep, Daniel Ricciardo, farm owner.

Obviously, she accepted the invitation due to lack of other plans and pure interest about what a f1 driver of over a decade could possibly need a farm for. So the next day, her legs awkwardly cramped up in between her suitcase and the back of the passenger seat in the taxi. Her fingers idly drummed against the window as sparse pellets of rain hit against it. The sun blared down through the glass despite the rain- clearly a perth summer was no joke when it came to heat.

The timing of the car finally slowing down just in front of Daniel’s farm/house/home situation perfectly aligned for when her phone died. Manoeuvring her feet out of the tight squeeze where her suitcase was crushing her legs was her first problem, actually picking it up to carry out of the car was a whole different one. Once again, luckily for her Daniel was standing at the door, his signature grin lighting up his face. 

After a tight hug and a quick exchange of the past few months they hadn’t seen each other for (the time post SIngapore), he picked up her suitcase with ease and lugged it inside. The inside of his house was nice, beautiful even. That was expected for a millionaire- but it wasn’t the typical too much money, not enough actual taste , it was classy and elegant, while maintaining a certain homely charm.

“This is beautiful, Dan,” She murmured, shaking her head back as she gathered her hair into a ponytail. He barked out a laugh as he kicked off his shoes, 2 scuff marks on the ground ruining the otherwise picturesque place. 

“Thank you,” He grinned, “I try my best- or more so Heidi does,” Ah, that made more sense. Not that Daniel didn’t seem capable of designing a nice place, but the fact that it was actually his girlfriend made a whole lot more sense. 

Nudging her shoes off and over to join next to his, she gently stretched out her limp to relieve the formed tension in her back, “Heidi does a fantastic job then,” Her eyes travelled around the living room, taking in each piece of wall art and decorative choice.

Daniel’s dirtied socks glided smoothly along the marble floors, “Can I get you a drink?” He hummed, one hand on the kitchen island to steady himself as the other opened the fridge door. He grabbed out a beer can for himself and so out of pure convenience and not wanting to seem ‘fussy’, she asked for the same.

The harsh, bitter taste of beer abused her throat, an unpleasant and unwelcome decision at only 3 in the afternoon. On the other hand, getting her first drink down then meant that as the night progressed further, and drinks got heavier- she’d be somewhat prepared from such a light percentage drink. 

The rest of the evening was spent outside on the balcony, sipping beer and discussing the end of the season- how it had felt to get back to racing for him since the last race she’d actually seen in person was in Singapore where he’d been replaced with Liam. 

They spoke briefly about Liam at that, Max too- mainly his dominance that season, partially about him as a person in general. They moved to speaking about Oscar’s rookie year, and then unsurprisingly, the topic landed onto Lando.

Finally, in the last hour before midnight, with her legs tucked up to her chest, she looked to her left where Daniel was in a rocking chair next to her. “I hooked up with Lando in Singapore,” She murmured, her index nail scraping along the condensation lined glass where only the last few drops of her whiskey-coke remained. “We hooked up and then I just left him there,” Daniel’s eyebrows shot up, his lips parting in shock.

“I knew that,” He eventually exhaled, his words completely different from his surprised reaction. “LN told me pretty much the day after it happened, and for the following weeks too,” Shit, that felt awful to hear. Part of her had wished that Lando had magically stopped caring the day after it had happened- she wanted it to be easy on him unlike how it was for her. It was her decision to have left, he shouldn’t have to continue to feel so deeply affected.

The wrinkles in the corners of her eyes deepened as she looked down, a comical laugh escaping her lips. “Why’d you react like that then?” Her lips feel cold as her throat remains hot from the intense burn of the vodka shots they’d stupidly taken a few hours prior. “You looked.. shocked,”

“I was,” He admitted, downing the last of his drink before resting it on the corner of his armrest, the corner of the glass hitting the wood with a clink. “ I am , I’m shocked you’re actually admitting you just abandoned the bloke after a night together. He thought you would never mention it again- never speak to him again,”

The edge of passive aggression in his voice is noticeable even to the most clueless people. It made her squirm in her seat, the palms of her hands get sweaty, and a bitter taste filled her mouth. Daniel wasn’t the type to ever get mad with anyone, or even be any bit confrontational, so the way he was speaking to her seemed so out of Ricciardo fashion.

“I know,” Her voice was barely a low hum, self disappointment pulsing through her body. “I’ve felt like shit ever since- if that means anything,” When her eyes lifted off the wood panel of the balcony fence and towards Daniel, he was looking far out towards the night sky. 

His gaze met hers though, his bottom lip grazing under his teeth. It was strange seeing him that serious. “Doesn’t really mean too much to me, I think Lando needs to hear that,” Yeah , apologising to Daniel wasn’t going to do much was it? Lando was the one she’d left.

“He actually cares?” Her voice came out more surprised and untrusting than she’d expected. The scrunch of his eyebrows and twist of his lips in confusion gets her to keep talking. “Yeah, like.. I guess I just assumed it would be just like any other hook up for him,” Her hand carded through her hair, pushing it off her forehead. 

“He cares more than anything,” Daniel murmured, a slight laugh attached to his voice. He wasn’t mad at her at all, fully understanding her scepticism about how real the younger driver’s feelings were. “I know he doesn’t seem as if he cares about each girl he gets with- but he cares about you,” Their eyes meet in a sort of sad and poetic way. 

Daniel knows better than anyone the way she feels toward Lando, how she’s felt towards the Brit for years. Up until that night in Singapore, she’d waited for the day she could look at her best friend and not feel the most excruciating twisting in her stomach and cracking of her heart because he was the one thing she wanted, and the one thing she couldn’t have.

“In Vegas when he crashed, he asked for you,” The Aussie's voice had lost its humour, any sense of fun from earlier in the night having fully faded away. “So many times. He was hysterical, couldn’t understand why you weren’t there to hold his hand,” 

Holy fucking shit. She wanted to cry, a tightening sensation formed in her throat, becoming painful to swallow. “I should’ve been there,” She bit down on the inside of her cheek, the sharp metallic taste of blood spilling onto her tongue. “I fucking should’ve reached out when I heard,” 

He squeezed her hand tightly, his thumb squishing her hand up to reach the tips of his index and middle. “You had no way to know, you weren’t expected to be there either. You have your own life, Lando needs to know that,” She can’t shake it from her head though. “You’re not in the wrong, you don’t owe him to be there whenever he needs comfort. I think he just needs to know you’re not angry at him,”

Angry? Why on earth would she be angry? Lando hadn’t done a single thing wrong to her, she did owe it to him to be there when he crashed, when he was scared and alone. “Yes I do,” Her eyebrows drew to a pinch, a look of frustration clouding over her vulnerable near crying expression.

“ You don’t”

I do, Daniel. You don’t get it. I left him, I left him there alone straight after-

“He told me he loved me,” 

That got a genuine look of shock from the Australian. “Shit. I didn’t know that,” His voice got breathy and harsh around the edges. 

“Yeah.”

“Do you love him back?”

“Yeah.”

His hand left hers, moving to rub over his face. “Jesus,” It was so quiet between them that the noise of the near midnight light breeze was louder than either of them. “Does he know that?”

The muscles in her neck tensed with a deep swallow of the spit gathering in her mouth. Gross. “No. I don’t think he knows I heard him either,” She’d never felt more shameful. Her mind had been so fuzzy with alcohol and lust that it had just been too much. “I didn’t think he was serious. I didn’t think he could seriously love me,”

God, she needed to shut up before she began bawling her eyes out to Daniel.

“Why not?” She didn’t quite know how to answer his question. There were probably a million and one things she could give as half arsed replies to why she didn’t believe she and Lando should be together. The distance, constant travelling, lack of affection and physical ties. But Daniel could see right through her, he could see her lies.

“I’m just nothing like the girls he’s been with before. I didn’t- I don’t understand why when he could have absolutely anyone in the world, he’d want me,” She corrected herself, feeling far more vulnerable then she’d ever allowed herself to be in front of anyone before.

They’re no longer looking at each other, both too focused at staring up at the stars above them. “You make him feel safe. You’re the only one he’s always felt like a real person around. He’s not a race car driver with you, he’s not famous with you, he doesn’t have to perform and impress you, to you- he’s Lando, he’s your best friend. And to him, you’re home,” 

It’s difficult to form a single thought after that. So after the conversation pulled to a complete close, they both agreed it was late and they needed their rest. With a suffocating hug and reassurances that she’ll be okay, they parted ways- Daniel into his own room and her into the spare bedroom. His snores seeped into her room, yet they weren’t what kept her from sleeping. 

Lando was. 

She swore she could hear him everywhere, even smell him. She wanted him laying down right next to her, his arms around her waist as she slept with her head on his chest. He was the only thing that could calm her down, make her mind shut up for a bit so she could just rest.

Her head had begun pounding and her mouth became infinitely dry from the excessive drinking, so with a struggle to stand up straight, she headed downstairs to the kitchen. Her eyes adjusted to the darkness and her clammy hands gripped onto the handrails as she took each step one by one. 

Passing through the kitchen, she grabbed a glass out of a cabinet and poured a glass of cold water. She chugged it down eagerly, getting a refill before heading into the living room to sit on the couch and drink the rest. As the couch became visible to her poor sight, she saw a figure sitting at the end further away from her. A mop of curly hair was on top of the figure’s head- Daniel. 

Clearly he’d been unable to sleep like she had. Maybe he felt lonely too. Heidi was back in Portugal over the winter break, so he hadn’t seen her in a few weeks. He was probably in a similar boat as her right now.

She felt so empty after the past few weeks, and the hug she’d gotten from him only a few hours hadn’t quite been enough, so she set her glass down and stepped closer. The noise of her glass hitting the table grabbed the shadowed figure of Daniel’s attention, his head turning to face her. “Daniel,” She mumbled weakly, sprawling onto the couch next to where he was sitting and wrapped her arms loosely around him.

When he didn’t hug her back, she whined and dug her head into his chest. “Please Dan, I need a hug,” Her voice sounded so desperate as it hit her ears. “I just.. I want my brain to shut up for once, I- I’m just so tired,” 

“I’m not Daniel,” Her heart pounded in absolute panic. Her chest rose and dropped quickly as she attempted to think of all the possible explanations. This couldn’t be real, this couldn’t be an intruder. God, how had she been so stupid as to not switch on a light or anything before practically hurdling herself at this guy? If she died right now, it was all on her for being a thoughtless idiot. 

But in a moment of clarity where her mind considered who could possibly be at the house that wasn’t an intruder, she scanned through each person Daniel knew with curly hair and a British accent. Lewis? Didn't have curly hair. George? Also without curly hair. Ollie? Too young for Daniel to be friends with. 

Oh. 

“Lando?” A sharp exhale left her mouth as his name slipped out. She twisted her head to look up at him, his features only slightly visible in the near pitch black room. Sure enough, big green eyes and plump pink lips stood out to her. Her face crumpled, her heart thrumming in her chest. “ Lando”

He clearly had recognised her too, his lips parting as his expression softened. His eyes felt like a million knives jabbing into her, his intense stare mapping out her whole face. The smell of his cologne was harsh on her senses, yet was the most comfort she’d had in months.

“Why are you here?” Her tone sounded accusatory, which clearly wasn’t intentional. The comment landed poorly, his expression contorting strangely. Not helpful . 

“Spontaneous Australia trip,” He didn’t owe her an apology, but something was nagging at him to stay, to engage in the conversation. It was the most he’d seen of her in nearly 4 months. He couldn’t even begin to express how good it felt to hear her voice after so long. “Came to visit Dan, maybe Osc next. Dan always tells me if I’m ever in the country I can just come over.. so” He trailed off when she didn’t reply, and his mouth clamped back shut.

Just as it seemed he would get up and leave, his actions tense and rigid around her, his arms wrapped tightly around her. Quiet. Her mind finally went quiet. It was so peaceful for once. “I’m so sorry for everything,” Her voice was hardly a whisper, her mouth slightly muffled by the thick fabric of his hoodie. “I’m sorry for leaving, I’m sorry for not contacting you, I’m sorry for ignoring you when you tried to call,” Her breaths became more frantic, tears piling up in her eyes as she looked up at him.

“I’m sorry for- for hurting you, I’m sorry for not being there when you needed me,” Her mouth and lips were so painfully dry, her tongue darted out to wet her lips before forcing out the final apology. Just as she was about to, his mouth opened as if he was about to talk. “Don’t say it’s okay,” 

She knew him well enough to know exactly where he was going. He would apologise for absolutely everything that had ever happened to him, even if he wasn’t the one in the wrong. “Most of all,” Her throat tensed as he stared her down intensely. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I loved you back.” 

His lips shaped into a huge smile after a few seconds of emotionless shock, as if the news was the most impossible thing he’d ever heard.

“And you shouldn’t forgive me,” She shook her head insistently. That was another thing hse knew about him, he was the most forgiving person ever. She could absolutely ruin his life a million times and with a single ‘ I’m sorry’ , they’d return back to being best friends. 

“But-”

“You can’t,” Not only did she not believe she deserved his love, she didn’t believe she deserved any sort of forgiveness from him, much less for him to still love her after all this. All she wanted was for him to not have any hurt from the whole ordeal anymore. 

Lando tilted his head, his bottom lip tucked under his adorably gapped teeth. “You don’t get to decide that for me,” His eyes seemed impossibly bright despite the darkness, “Cause I want to love you, and it seems as if you love me too,” His right hand cupped her cheek, his thumb rubbing over her chin.

That was correct, she still loved him more than anything. She could fight those feelings away, give him all the excuses under the sun as to why she wouldn’t be with him- but her heart and mind wanted different things. Logically, dating a formula one driver who’s whole life revolved around travel and constant adrenaline- her life that consisted of a lot of mundane jobs and chilling at home, they just clashed .

The illogical part of her, the part that was thinking with her heart, believed that nothing would be better than to attend races, watch from the grandstands, and kiss him after each race. She could comfort him if he had a bad race or quali, she could be there to celebrate with after a podium or even a win. 

Right now, and maybe always, what her heart wanted was significantly outweighing what she thought was good for her. “Yeah, I do love you,” It didn’t feel or sound weird like it had when she’d told Daniel about it the night before. It felt good, really good. Very right too, because in all of her years of friendship with Lando- ever since she’d realised her feelings for him- she hadn’t ever admitted to herself that she loved him. 

But of course she did, it was clear as day. If she ever heard of anyone ‘liking’ someone the way she ‘liked’ Lando, she’d know immediately it was love.

Her confession felt even better when she saw how his face managed to light up even further. 

There was more she could’ve apologised for, and she could easily keep going, but she was quickly shut up with two lips pressed up against her own. Lando tasted just as sweet as he always did, a tinge of mint presumably from gum earlier on. 

Her lips didn’t adjust into the kiss at first, until he began to pull back and her lips secured over his bottom one, keeping him there. It took a few moments to warm up to it, but her mouth starts moving in time with his. It’s so quiet in the living room that the only noise is the quiet hums and sighs they both let out. “I’m really sorry,” She murmured again

His hands moved to position her body to be straddling him, not necessarily to make the kiss sexual, but to make the angle more comfortable. “I forgive you,” His teeth tug on her bottom lip, drawing out the kiss for longer. He grinned against her lips, kissing her softer over and over. “And I love you,” He murmured again. “So- please- stop- apologising,” He kissed her in between each word, trying to push forward his point.

It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders, “Okay,” Her cheeks felt hot to the touch, painted a darker shade of rosy red with each kiss. “Sorry,”

Lando groaned, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her in for more kisses. “For each time you apologise, I’m gonna shut you up with kisses,” He threatened, nudging her cheek with his nose.

“Sorry, but I’m gonna keep saying sorry then. Sorry, sorry, sorry” He kept his promise, kissing her after each and every apology. “Mmm, yeah. Sorry,” Her fingers slid into place in his mess of curls, tugging gently to keep him in place for each kiss. 

“Bad idea.” He clicked his tongue, tilting his head to avoid her kisses. “No kisses till you stop saying it,”

That worked. 

“Okay, I’ll stop. I promise,” She held out her pinky finger to further the promise. He kissed the tip of her finger and then held it tight. 

“Good,”

“Good,”

“ Good ,” His lips slotted back into place with hers, his hands resting on her hips as hers tangled further into his hair. “You’re so pretty,” He hummed, licking into her mouth with slow and calculated moves.

“Hmm, you’re prettier,” Her whole body felt hot, but so cosy on top of him. She hadn’t quite realised how tired she was until that very moment, her words slightly slurred and her eyes heavy. She rubbed at her eyes, blinking away exhaustion.

He shifted underneath her, tucking his hands under her thighs to help wrap her legs around his waist. “Arms around my neck,” He whispered, intentionally keeping his volume to a minimum so as to not wake her up more. 

Her body felt limp as she rested all her weight onto him. He lugged her upstairs, opening the door with one hand as his other arm remained around her waist. “Lannnn,” She whined as she pressed more kisses to his neck. 

“Yeah baby?” He murmured as he laid her down on the bed, her body heavy and weak as it hit the mattress. “What’s up?” Her arms dropped down to her sides as they unlinked from around his neck.

“Stay,” It wasn’t a suggestion or question, more an incredulously desperate request. “Please, want you to stay,” She tugged at the hem of his shirt, wrapping it around her fingers.

He gave her a knowing look before nudging her over in the bed, crawling under the sheets next to her. “You’re not going to walk out this time?” He raised his eyebrows, his teeth poking out over his bottom lip when he grinned.

“I’m gonna say it,”

“Don’t” His voice went serious.

“I’m gonna say it,”

“Do.. not.. say.. It,”

“..Sorry,”

Lando let out a long groan, hauling himself half on top of her to smother her with his arms. “You are such a pain in my ass,” 

“You love me,” She pecked him, fighting back sleep just so she could keep kissing him

“I do love you,” He caved and removed his arms, placing them on either side of her face to corner her and kiss all over her flushed face.

“I love you more,” 

“Not possible,” He tutted, “And you need to sleep- now,” He nuzzled into her neck, his nose bumping against her ear. 

“I just wanna stay up kissing,” She scrunched her nose up, her lip raising in disappointment. 

Lando’s laugh was breathy against her skin, his hand idly swiping across her stomach to maintain some sort of touch. “Tomorrow. We’ll spend all of tomorrow kissing- I promise,”

That was satisfactory enough. She stared up at the ceiling, a complete different scenario from when she’d done exactly this last time with Lando laying on her. This time, there wasn’t a single cloud of doubt in her mind. She knew how much he loved her, she felt right being so close to him, not worried for how things might change between them and if it would be awful the day after. She just needed to keep faith and keep communication.

As she felt her eyelids getting too heavy to keep hers open, she swiped her hand over Lando’s forehead to push his hair up and place a kiss there. He looked up at her slightly, and with a smile, “Oscar lives in Melbourne,” He looked confused, probably thinking that he was mishearing her from lack of rest. “Huh?” His voice all deep and scruffy from sleep. 

“The flight from Perth to Melbourne is over 3 hours- you can’t really just pop down the street to go visit Oscar,” Lando laughed weakly at that. He shrugged, wiggling up closer towards her so his chin was over her shoulder.

“He’ll come visit- he’ll be ecstatic to know that we’re on good terms again,” Her hand drifted up under his shirt, her thumbs pressing into the joints of his back.

“Oscar and ecstatic are two words that absolutely do not go together,” She mused, a complete disconnect from her mind and whatever her hand was doing. All she knew was that Lando was enjoying it based on the noises he was letting out.

“A half smile may dance across his mouth at the joyous information,” God , Lando had such a strange way with words. 

“You’re weird ,” 

“You love me,”

“I really do,”

[sabrina-kpop]

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII, can I request a the poly hashira x fem gyaru reader who gets made fun of by the other demon slayers? (Angst but a very fluffy ending) :3

ׅ𝑆𝑡𝑟𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑒𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑜𝑢𝑡! ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

my very first request yay!! and it's of my life style!? Double yay!! In this oneshot I made the reader off of my sub style which is manba!! And sorry if this is bad which it probably is.. AND YOU ARE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH MUICHIRO YOU ARE SEEN AS A MOTHER FIGURE

WARNINGS: swearing (Sanemi ofc) slut shaming (I'm based this on my experience with being gyaru) bullying ect.

Being a gal while also being a demon hunter has is pros and cons, pros being hanging out with Tengen and Mitsuri for new clothes and cons being your makeup sweating off and hair getting messed up while on a mission.

Today is a day where the hashira (specifically Tengen) invited you and the rest to a summer festival, of course you where excited you haven't gone to a festival since you were a little girl.

You have finished doing your hair and makeup looking beautifully crazy along with your outfit, you hear a knock on your door and before you could answer Shinobu walked in "Ara ara, well aren't you looking beautiful my butterfly" she said complimenting you, you utter out a small thanks,still not being used to compliments.

you walked out with Shinobu and met up with the rest, Gyomei and Giyuu grabbed your hands and the rest began to go to the city.

What you didn't know is that Rengoku, Shinobu and Giyuu brought some of their tsugoku's and slayers with them and they don't really get along with you. They saw you as a weirdo because of your fashion sense and looks although you try your best to ignore them sometimes it can hit you a little hard......

"What is she wearing" strike one.

Ouch that hurt. You are so confident for your rebel style and yet now you're feeling like it's getting pulled away you try to ignore it but it remains in the back of your mind.

"Y/n...are you feeling okay..?" Said Muichiro you reassure him that your fine and continued your way to the city with the rest.

It was evening and you have a ride to the city it was crowded and it was bright seeing people talk, dance, laugh and show of their Japanese pride.

"Ah! It's so crowded! " Mitsuri said in a high pitched voice. Obanai suggested that you all go to a restaurant to rest and eat but you said that you wanted to see the jewelry booths and clothing booths set up outside.

Giyuu sent two of his kakushi just in case something happened.

You immediately wandered off into one of the booths that were selling jewelry. You mean started buying a bunch of them some for partners and some for you.

"Jesus Christ doesn't she have enough... She going to die from blood stopping with all those tight bands around her wrist... "

Strike two.

You really put some back listening to what they said it hurt you like if someone stabbed you in the heart you tried to ignore them again but how could you all they do is talk about you and your features you feel like nothing you feel like a clown.

"I'm back!" You said with a bag in your hands "I bought all of you some new cute clothes!" You said happily as you hand them their gifts. They happily thanked you and began to order food.

The food was delicious. The meat had a juicy flavor and the rice was perfect.

"Fuck, I'm full" utter out Sanemi

"Really? I could go for more!" Said Mitsuri. Both Obanai and Sanemi look at her in a "what the fuck?" face as Shinobu and you giggled from the side.

You got up to go to the restroom but you ain't mean it shivered due to your clothes being slightly revealing. Although you knew that this will be the consequences from deciding that your outfit looked better without a jacket and quickly shrugged it of as "beauty is pain"

As you went to the restroom and finished doing your business, you were washing your hands so you heard this.

" you can clearly tell that she's cold she was shivering so hard that when she gets for being a slut with those revealing clothes. "

Strike three, your out.

You immediately began to tear up why were they saying these things to you what did you ever do to them this has been going on for years now and it hasn't stopped. why couldn't they just accept you for who you are? Why couldn't the see that you were happy being yourself? Why couldn't they see that you are human too?

Suddenly you heard a knock on the restroom door.

"Y/n you've been their for a while are you okay?.." It was Giyuu.

"Y-yeah I'm okay..." You said trying to cover up the sound of your crying.

"Are you sure..? It's sounds like you aren't.."

You went quite and started sobbing as Giyuu opened the door and went in while the rest followed..

Mitsuri went up to you and tried to calm you down the best she can, keyword "tried"...

"Y/n just tell us what happened..!" Said Mitsuri panicking not really knowing what to do..

"Am I w-wierd?" You utter out as the rest looked at you with worry

"The fuck is that supposed to mean" said Sanemi.

"I-it's just that people when they see me the way I am they think of me as some kind of slut.."

Who the hell told you that I swear I'm going to beat them into next wee-" Sanemi said as Shinobu cut him off.

" Oh my little butterfly....you're nothing like that you're not even close you're beautiful and you're special.

Shinobu said.

" yeah you have the courage to be flamboyant while the others are just idiot with no sense of style "

Said Uzui.

"Y/n your beauty is like a flame bright and beautiful! "

Said Rengoku

"You're so beautiful doing your nails everyday is so much fun especially trying out new patterns!"

Said Mitsuri.

" Seriously tell me who made you think like that, I will show them no mercy.. "

Said Sanemi.

"You remind me of that one flowers...what was it called...? Hibiscus..? "

Said Muichiro.

"You remind me of water.... Useful and when at sea.... Sparkling.."

Said Giyuu.

"Your personality is bright and energetic...I will always pray for it to stay that way.. "

Said Gyomei.

But your personality is also soft and kind... It's one if the reasons why Kaburamaru loves you so much...

Said Obanai.

You can't believe them each and every one of their words fix your heart piece by piece you made them all get into one group hug even if Sanemi and Giyuu can't stand them..

"Wait! Hurry the fireworks are about to start" squealed Mitsuri dragging you and the rest outside. You guys found the perfect spot to watch the fireworks. as you all sat down you couldn't help but think of grateful you are to have such partner's "Thank you.. " you said as they look at you and smiled. You rest you head on giyuu's shoulder while you all watched the fireworks...

[pinkpigtailsprincess]

𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ Dollies 63 Days of Summer Glow up!! Day 1 > Prep 🎀☀️🐬

Hii Dolls!! 🎀 Welcome 2 my newest series of my 2 month long summer glow up process its pretty self explanatory but im gonna be documenting my 2 month long summer glow up process 2 just be a better me!! enjoy!! ☀️

DISCLAIMER!! ; i will censoring and dancing around certain topics just bc ik they can be triggering to some folk that have issues so cw; vauge mentions of w3!ght!! 💗

Stage 1 : Health! ☀️

It always important to keep up with ur health obvii 2 maintain good balance in life! ☀️

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Diet!! 🍏

Now diet wise i already do have a pretty balanced and healthy diet to begin with so i won’t have to that much work on my diet but i definitely wanna make small improvements!!🎀

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Diet Goals!! 🍋

incorporate different from my usual ones fruits!!

expand my palate (chronic picky eater)

making more meals that are still healthy & tasty but not repetitive!!

not skipping my meals!!

cutting out all meats except fish!!

push myself to like cucumbers

get back into drinking more fruit water!!

stop eating so much cheese!

knowing my limit when eating!

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Exercise !! 🧘‍♀️

Doing more exercise is definitely a huge one for me because there was a point where i did it daily but then i stopped bc i feel into a rut but then i started again but only once a month so im trying to get back into daily exercise!!

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Fitness Goals!! 🧘‍♀️

workout more than once a month!

do more yoga + cardio + home pilates

use exercise to make me healthier & happier

lose w*ight i won’t disclose how much i want to loose and how much i wanna be bc that’s personal 2 me !!

feeling comfortable in my body + build discipline

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Oral Health !! 🪥

I Will say i did recently update my oral hygiene routine bc i got braces so now i have to do more work but i definitely wanna still add things to it!!

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Oral Health Goals !! 🦷

consistently floss in the morning as well as night

buy a tongue scraper

get an electric toothbrush

start oil pulling

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Mental Health !! ☀️

I Sooo wanna improve some thing in my mental health bc obviously its super important to not only take care of my physical health but my mental health!! 🎀

𐙚 𓈒 ݁ ₊ Mental Health Goals !! 🧁

get back into journaling

get back into meditation

step out of my comfort zone

build more confidence in social settings!

replace most phone time with reading time

spend more time outside

prioritizing rest more

not being to hard on myself

celebrating all my wins and accomplishments no matter how big or small!

Stage2 ೀ⋆ : Hygiene!

I Already have a pretty solid skincare routine to begin with but honestly i just wanna improve to it and add more to it ! 🎀

Skincare ୭₊˚ ! 🎀

For my Skincare routine i already have my products and my basics but honestly i wanna stater using different products to better help my skin!!

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Skincare Goals ! ⭐️

ice rolling

gua-sha

jade rolling

bi weekly dermaplaing

weekly face mask

facial steaming

facial cleansing brush

use more Korean & Japanese products (Japanese products are literally the best)

Body-care ୭₊˚ ⭐️

Another section where i wanna make improvement i already exfoliate,hair removal sometimes and i use my antibacterial soap and my body washes but theres a bunch of things i wanna incorporate!! 💗

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Bodycare Goals ! 🐬

start dry brushing

exfoliate weekly

shave or epilating more often (my own choice bc honestly i don’t like the feeling of body hair

use my glycolic acid more routinely

buy more sweet smelling body products

find a signature scent

use body oil + body butter + body glitter

using an African exfoliating net instead of a rag

Haircare ୭₊˚ ! 💗

For my Hair care i definitely wanna make room for improvement i mainly detangle every day with just some water or style depending on if i need/want to or not and i oil my scalp!!

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Haircare Goals ! 🐬

Grow it out more with the Help of Indian Amla Oil (some said it stinks but if it helps)

Learn More Hair Styles

Use Rice Water

castor oil

Scalp Massage More Often

Hair Masque Bi-Weekly

Trim Split Ends

Deep Conditioning On a Wash Day

Nailcare ! ୭₊˚ ⭐️

use more cuticle oil

professional manipedis bi weekly!

soak my feet with foot salts more

develop my own at home nail care routine

Facials!!🎀

buy new daily vitamins!!

keep my hair professionally done!!

use my primuce stone more

buy more lipgloss + vaseline lip care

Stage 3 ೀ⋆ Makeup + Jewelry + Fashion + Perfumes 🛍️ !!

I wanna learn how to do my makeup again so badly! and this time i have more tips so i can actually learn how to do it properly!! 🫧

Makeup Goals ୭₊˚ !

find the perfect soft glam dolly makeup

perfect my eyebrows

learn to glue down lashes

make the perfect base

learn to bronze and contour correctly

perfect the highlighter placement

get the perfect sun kissed summer doll makeup

again buy more lipgloss

Jewelry Goals ୭₊˚ ! ⭐️

i desperately have been needing new jewelry and for the longest and ive stupidly been wearing silver knowing i like gold better

buy bangels

get gold hoops

get a new nameplate

get more necklaces

get more rings

get anklets !!

Fashion Goals ୭₊˚ ! 🛍️

actually dress in clothes i genuinely like

dress for my body type

not toning down my dressing for random people

build confidence in my outfits

start sewing some of my outfits bc i can

make crochet pieces for the beach

buy tons of cute clothes!!

make more inspo boards !!

Stage 4 ; Posture,Eloquence + Mannerism + Photogenic 🎀🍰

Definitely a Big one for me i wanna fix my posture and definitely speak up more in public bc im a little shy 🙈🎀!

Posture Goals ୭₊˚ ! 🫧

fix my back posture

learn to again regulate my nervous sustem and relax my shoulders

be more fluid in my movements!!

walking with my head up

Eloquence Goals ୭₊˚ ! 🛁

speaking louder in public so people can actually hear me

speaking clearly with confidence

controlling my facial expressions more

smiling more!! 😁

Mannerism Goals + Body Language ୭₊˚ ! 🛍️

I tend to tone down my natrual mannerisms ALOT when im out in public and honestly im tried of not being my true self in public and i let the opinions of those around me influence me into toning it down

be more animated as i am at home in public

walk the way i want to!!

practice princess mannerisms with my own little spin🤭

walk around like a princess bc im literally a princess

Extra Goals ୭₊˚ ! 🛍️

be more photogenic

learn how to pose

be more videogenic

walk around like i won the place (4 the confidence esque of it

Stage 5: Mindset!!🎀⭐️

The Final Stage!!🎀: where ill be implementing so mindsets of some my favs and learn how to express myself in my environment bc honestly it sucks not being able to be myself around my family ⭐️

Mindset Goals ୭₊˚ ! 🐬

knowing my worth

not letting outside opinions dictate my life

unapologetically being myself around my family

reminding my self that people opinions don’t matter

always have a one track mind with all my goals!!

again not being too hard on myself!

Thank you all so much 4 reading i can’t wait till start documenting my journey with you guys!!🎀⭐️ XO,Dolly!!

[orange-cheetah]

Sakura Haruka (桜 遥) Character Profile

Bofurin | Tamon Unit | 1st Year Grade Captain

School: Furin High 1-1

Height: 169cm | Weight: 59kg | Birthday: 1 April | Constellation: Aries | Blood type: AB

Image colour: Amber [Might be a specific shade in Japanese (#FFBF00) - see below]

Likes: Fighting | Dislikes: Weak guys

Favourite food: Omurice (recent discovery) | Disliked food: Vegetables in general

Fashion style: Likes slim-fit pants and high-tech sneakers. "Sporty" clothing

Hobby: Taking walks

Favourite season: Spring | Favourite music genre: Doesn't listen to music

Best subject: PE | Worst subject: Classroom lectures in general

Special skill: I-shape balancing

Person they respect, senpai they look up to: None

Dream: To become the top of the school

Recent W (or L): Got lost while taking a walk

Favourite place: Classroom

What they always do in the morning: Wash his face

[masterlist]

[observeowl]

Second Chance | Chapter 3 - Choices Were Made

Series masterlist

In the past, you often avoided going back home for dinner because you didn’t want to face your parents half arguing, half not. There were times when you were sure if you weren’t there, they would have gotten a divorce or, at the very least, live separately. They are business partners, which was the root of their stress. Initially, you wanted to live in a dorm to experience dorm life and have fun. But after much deliberation, you stayed because you were too lazy to wash your own clothes and loved to have food prepared for you. Plus, the space was definitely a lot bigger at home as you occupied the dining table as your study space. 

This time, you were going to make an effort to make them closer to each other. This is tough because you didn’t grow up in a family where you show love openly. It was often hidden under other actions and words. 

Your first step was to bring them out more often. It could be just a lunch or dinner, but it relieves the stress of your mother thinking about what to cook and makes your father happy for not eating the same thing over and over again. You remember he loves to eat ramen for some reason. That was the only Japanese food that he would eat. 

“I’m going out now! I’ll let you know if I need Dad to pick me up.” You shouted when you were at the door wearing your shoes. You were heading to the party that Fredrick was hosting at his house. Diana invited you, and you’d usually declined because parties were not your type as you were a lightweight, and you wanted to impress Nat with your grade. Now that you’re free from your shackles, you decide to join and meet someone new. 

You meet with Diana and Camellia at her house before going together because you don’t want to enter some stranger's house alone and not know where to go. Diana has experience going to his parties and knows how it usually goes. She gave you a rough idea of how it goes as you took a cab there. No matter what, be aware of who is giving you a drink. 

“Hey, Diana! You’ve come.” Frederick gave her a wide hug before ushering her to where the drinks were. I stick to my beer that I’m comfortable with, and we wander around the house until we find a group we’re comfortable with. Diana, the ever-social girl, found her friends and gave us a sheepish smile and waved before leaving. 

“Isn’t that Nat and her friends?” Camellia asked as she saw a huge group at the corner. “Why don’t we head over there then? A chance to get closer to your crush.” She suggested. Having been in high school together, she knew of your crush as you texted her every time you managed to get closer to her. 

“No. She’s not my crush anymore.” Usually, when you deny such allegations, there’s always a hint of shyness on your face, but this time you were glaring at Nat with some sort of anger on your face that made Camellia afraid to ask what happened. 

Not wanting to be the only one walking around, you and Camellia joined the others on the dance floor to stretch your joints a bit. You started off with a few shakes before gaining more confidence and getting into the groove. “Hey ladies, why don’t you come and join us.” You shared a glance with Camellia before agreeing to join the group of guys.

The group introduced themselves, and you were pleasantly surprised that most of them were in the same faculty as you. When it came to asking about their clubs, it honestly slipped your mind that you were in the Archery Club because you wanted to get closer to Clint, who was Nat’s best friend. Now it doesn’t seem like a good idea. Furthermore, you were the logistic director, and can’t be seen quitting suddenly. You gave a mental note that you needed to check if you had gotten your bow at this point.

“Are you alright? You seem a little flush.” Andrew asked. “Do you need me to get you a glass of water?” 

You shook your head. “No, it’s alright. I get red very easily.” A few more talks with them made you realise how much you missed. You could have been having fun with your friends, meeting new people, but you were nose deep into your books, chasing someone who abandoned you in the end. 

All of you agreed to bid for the same modules if possible in the future, seeing as bidding for the new semester was going to start soon in a few weeks. 

Andrew offered to get you a new beer because he hadn’t seen you drinking the one in your hand for a long time, but you shook your head. “It’s alright. I can hardly finish one bottle of beer.” 

“A lightweight?” You nodded hesitantly. You have drank more than a bottle of beer and a few shots of soju. While you still were conscious of what you were doing, you ended the day by throwing up in a public restroom in some mall. You bet if you drank more often, you would build up a better resistance to alcohol, but you didn’t want to take the risk. “It’s rare to see a lightweight at a party.” 

“I wanted to try something different.” You shrugged your shoulders. 

He smiled and took the beer out of your hands, finishing it in a few gulps for you. “There, done. Do you want to get out of here?” 

“I came here with my friends.” You weren’t sure if you wanted to leave with him. 

“You can ask them. I don’t mind waiting.” He’s making it hard for you to say no. You interrupted Camellia’s conversation with Micheal and told her that you were heading out with Andrew. She gave you the thumbs up before continuing to talk. At least she was having fun. 

Even though there was air conditioning inside, the cool night air was a lot more comforting. “Do you think you’d ever go to a party again?” 

“Maybe a different kind of party, like a birthday party or something. Where it’s more about the fun and talking rather than drinking.” You answered. 

“Where do you stay? I can drive you back.” You looked at him sceptically. “I’m a great driver. But, I’ll drive extra slow for you tonight,”

You decided to give him a chance and got in his car. “Just drive normally.”  

Once you arrived home, your parents were intrigued that a guy drove you back but decided not to mention anything.

===

Natasha didn’t expect to see you at the party. Over the years, Tony has hosted many parties, and she tried to invite you as you were already a close friend of theirs, but you always declined, which was why you were always the one who picked her up from the parties she attended. You never gave her a concrete answer why and she didn’t push you either. 

Maria nudged her slightly, which got her to turn her head. “I thought you were looking for Y/N? Why didn’t you ask her to come and join us?” 

“I got my answer from her.” 

“Oh? So you managed to meet her earlier?” 

Nat shook her head. “I just got my answer when she looked over here and went away.” 

“What did you actually want to talk to her about?” Natasha got up from her seat to get another set of drinks, and Maria got the notion that she didn’t want to talk about it. 

Natasha knew you were in the same predicament as her when you walked away. Usually, you’d be the one pulling your friend to join because you were afraid to meet her alone. When she saw you glaring at her, she knew she wasn’t the only one to be brought back into this year. 

When she saw you with your new group of friends, she couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy and anger through her. In her mind, both of you were still together. You were still married to her as of yesterday! How could you have gotten over her so quickly? You didn’t even give her a chance to talk and explain. And now she’s expected to walk away like she doesn't know you? How is this fair to her?

Natasha returned with more drinks for the group, and everyone took theirs before continuing with their conversation. “Are you ready to help Clint carry his part of the project?” Tony asked after rounding his talk with Vision. “Ready for the presentation?” 

“Thank goodness I’m not in Clint’s group with you.” Maria said. 

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’ll have you know we’ll score A for this!” Clint defended. There are stories that Clint doesn’t do very well in his presentation or his exams, for that matter. But his debate and application are fantastic, which was why Natasha was willing to be in his group, as he knew which case law to use and which precedent case to cite. Since the bulk of the work is done, only the presentations left with Nat have a natural talent. 

“There’s nothing to prepare for. I got it.” Natasha knew that was a lie, she had to check which topic she was going to present, but she knew every presentation, she scored an A. 

“Ever the confident Romanoff,” Tony said. “There’s nothing that can strike you down, is there?”

Series masterlist

@dyslexic-dreamer @unexpected-character @eternalnight410

@leenasayeed @oh-thats-sad @skz-xii @gay-frogs-dancing-around

@justspance

[perfectsunlight]

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐢 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝

𝒏𝒂𝒌𝒂𝒎𝒖𝒓𝒂 𝒌𝒂𝒛𝒖𝒉𝒂 𝒙 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐧𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟗.𝟐𝐤

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 "𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐢 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝" 𝐛𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫.

kazuha never liked feelings. 

the nerves she got before performances, the waves of anxiety that came whenever she had to audition, or even the dreadful feeling that suffocated her whenever she didn’t do her best. all of these and more were on the list of feelings she didn’t like.

except you were at the top of that list.

you and kazuha arrived at the dutch national ballet academy in the netherlands at the same time. at first, kazuha was supposed to room with someone else, but the academy thought it would be nice for you two to get closer since you both were foreigners. 

kazuha didn’t like the feeling she got when you shook her hand and introduced yourself. she hated the way her gaze wanted to stay on your figure as she watched you moving boxes in and out of your bedroom across the hall. these small, icky feelings were at the top of her list for sure, even if she couldn’t understand why.

it was really awkward between you two at first, especially since the japanese girl didn’t really know how to talk to you. 

6:00 am was a time kazuha was well acquainted with. the violet hues of dawn peering into the apartment and casting shadows across the place. drowsiness was also another familiar, but unwelcome feeling. but she was used to it.

what she wasn’t used to was the way she couldn’t keep her eyes off of you. 

the white sweatshirt was loose fitting on you and your hair was wet and worn down, a clear indication that you had just showered. your toothbrush moved back and forth as you walked past the kitchen, unaware of the pair of eyes glued to you as you began to get ready.

there it was again, that unfamiliar feeling.

kazuha turned her head back to the half opened loaf of bread that was in front of her before taking a piece out and putting it into the toaster. she reminded herself that she had practice soon; both of you had practice in an hour and a half. there was no time for staring at you right now, especially since she hadn’t even gotten dressed yet.

you continued to walk to and from your bedroom and into the kitchen, still dressed in your baggy sweater and a pair of spandex. once again, the japanese girl found herself stealing glances at you. it wasn’t like you were doing anything special, you were just making breakfast. 

a few minutes later, the sound of the toaster ding prompted her to grab the piece of bread, but her hand halted when she heard you calling her name.

“kazuha?” 

she blinked a few times to bring herself out of her trance, that icky familiar feeling in her stomach as she locked eyes with yours. “yes?” part of her felt a bit embarrassed, and she panicked internally for a moment. did you notice her staring?

your hand stuck out with a bowl of oatmeal. she glanced between you and the bowl, a look of slight confusion on her face. 

“i made some for you, too.” 

kazuha's surprise was evident on her face as she accepted the bowl of oatmeal from you. she had never expected such a gesture, especially considering the initial awkwardness between you two. but there it was, a small act of kindness that touched her in a way she couldn't explain.

"thank you," she managed to say, her voice a little softer than usual. kazuha couldn't help but notice the way you had prepared the oatmeal just the way she liked it—warm, with a sprinkle of cinnamon on top. it was a detail that didn't go unnoticed.

to be honest, the detail almost made her drop the bowl in pure shock. you must have watched her make it when you both moved in yesterday morning. either way, that small gesture made her feel seen in a way she really never had been before.

as she sat down at the kitchen table, a mix of emotions washed over her. the icky sensation she had been feeling had turned into something warmer in that small moment. why did the feeling feel different? you had only made her a bowl of oatmeal, it wasn’t anything extraordinary.

you joined her at the table, attention focused on your own bowl of oatmeal. as you both ate breakfast across from each other, a comfortable silence settled between the two of you. it was as if your small gesture had made things a bit less awkward between the both of you.

kazuha found herself stealing glances at you from time to time, studying the way you ate your breakfast with a calm demeanor. she couldn't deny the gentle warmth that began to spread within her, another new foreign feeling that made her want to vomit.

the taxi ride to the ballet academy was always less than 20 minutes. however, kazuha couldn’t help but feel like it was the longest drive of her life. she was still feeling weird, and she knew that sitting next to you in a car was definitely not helping. 

the subtle bumps of your shoulders hitting each other as the car drove made the japanese girl clench her fists inside her jacket pockets. she stole a glance at you, after fighting the urge to do so for the past several minutes. 

you were looking out the window, the autumn leaves falling in shades of brown and orange, completely distracted to notice the japanese girl staring at you. but kazuha was noticing everything about you, at that moment.

the curve of your jaw, the faint pink blush you wore on your cheeks, the way you smelled like coconut and vanilla, courtesy of your shampoo and conditioner. 

it was as if every detail of you had imprinted itself on kazuha's mind. she couldn't explain why she was so hyper-aware of your presence, why every little thing about you seemed to captivate her. it was frustrating and confusing, and she desperately tried to push these foreign feelings away.

but as the car rolled to a stop in front of the ballet academy, kazuha couldn't deny the fluttering in her chest. she realized that her aversion to feelings was futile, for these emotions had already taken root deep within her, even if she didn’t know what they exactly were.

stepping out of the car, you both walked side by side towards the entrance. the autumn breeze rustled through the trees, carrying a sense of anticipation and change. kazuha glanced at you, feeling a surge of nervousness mixed with an odd sense of excitement.

the familiar sounds of ballet echoed through the academy's halls as you entered. the wooden floors creaked beneath your feet, creating a symphony of anticipation. kazuha tried to focus on the routine, on the steps and movements that she had practiced countless times before. but her mind kept drifting back to you, to the way you had suddenly occupied a space in her mind.

during practice, as the ballet instructor called out instructions and the music swelled, kazuha's eyes would occasionally meet yours in the mirrored reflection. there was an unspoken connection between you two, a shared silent understanding of the passion and dedication it took to pursue your own dreams. 

after all, you both had left home to pursue this path. there was a reason ballet was difficult, and it was because it broke your body just as much as it broke your mind.

since the two of you were new to the academy, you were each paired with a senior partner. kazuha stared at the dutch dancer in front of her, a polite smile on her face as she tried her best to listen to her senior’s words.

however, the japanese girl couldn’t help but feel her eyes wanting to wander towards your figure. only the side of your face was visible, but you still seemed to have almost all of her attention. your brows were furrowed in obvious concentration as you nodded along to whatever your partner was telling you.

in those stolen glances, kazuha saw something more than just a fellow dancer. she saw someone who mirrored her own love for the art form, and who also stirred something deeper within her. it was a mix of admiration, curiosity, and that unfamiliar feeling she couldn’t quite get rid of yet.

later that evening, after hours of practice had ended, you two were once again in the backseat of a taxi on your way home together. 

the taxi ride home was quieter than before. the exhaustion from the day's rigorous training had settled in, and kazuha found herself leaning against the window, watching the city lights blur past. the silence between you two was comfortable, no longer burdened by awkwardness but tinged with a growing familiarity.

as the taxi turned a corner, you shifted in your seat, your shoulder lightly brushing against kazuha's. it was a simple touch, but it sent a jolt of electricity through her. she couldn't help but steal a quick glance at you, wondering if you had felt it too. your gaze met hers briefly, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still.

but as the taxi pulled up in front of the apartment building, reality set in. the moment was fleeting, and the door to the taxi opened, signaling the end of the journey. you both stepped out onto the sidewalk, the cool evening air washing over you.

once you two got inside your shared apartment, kazuha went into her bedroom and shut the door gently. she went into the bathroom and got ready to shower, ready to wash off the day’s worth of sweat lingering on her skin.

warm water fell down her body as she gently closed her eyes, relishing in the comfort the warm shower brought her. usually showers were a place she could clear her mind, but this time it seemed as if you still lingered in the forefront.

thoughts of you swirled in kazuha's mind, intermingling with the steam rising from the water. she couldn't deny the growing attraction she felt, but it also frightened her. friendships were complicated, messy, and she had always kept her emotions at arm's length. opening up to someone meant vulnerability, and that was a territory she had never been comfortable exploring.

as she finished her shower and wrapped herself in a towel, kazuha stood in front of the mirror, staring at her reflection. her heart was conflicted, torn between the familiar comfort of suppressing her feelings and the exhilarating prospect of something new. 

she knew she had to make a choice. she could continue to guard her heart, maintain the status quo, and keep her distance from you. or she could take a leap of faith, embrace the unknown, and allow herself to explore the depths of her emotions.

the decision weighed heavily on her, but deep down, kazuha knew that playing it safe would only lead to regret. she couldn't ignore the feeling in her chest whenever she was around you, as foreign as it was.

with a determined look in her eyes, kazuha took a deep breath and made up her mind. she would take a chance, step out of her comfort zone, and let her feelings guide her. it was a risky endeavor, but she realized that sometimes the most rewarding experiences came from embracing the uncertainties of life.

after she dressed and left her bedroom, kazuha walked toward the kitchen. she took a moment to gather her thoughts and steady her nerves before she opened her mouth to speak, but the words got caught in her throat.

you were standing in a hoodie and sweats, humming softly as you seemed to be putting cut pieces of lettuce into a small bowl. once your eyes caught your roommate’s, a gentle smile formed on your lips as you looked at her in the dim light of the kitchen.

“i made some salad for us. i don’t know if you like any dressing on it or not, but i figured you’d be just as hungry as i am.” you said casually, unaware of the way kazuha’s stomach churned a little when you mentioned once again that you had been thinking about her.

kazuha felt her heart skip a beat at your thoughtful gesture. it was another instance where you seemed to anticipate her needs, and it only deepened this new feeling growing. she managed to find her voice, although it wavered slightly as she responded. 

“thank you, you didn’t have to.” she whispered softly, eyes locking with yours for a moment as you answered her. 

“oh it’s not a problem,” your small smile still ghosted your lips. “i wanted to.”

kazuha's heart fluttered at your words, and she couldn't help but feel a sense of warmth spread through her. it was in these simple moments of genuine care and consideration that her initial aversion to feelings started to fade away.

as you both sat down at the kitchen table and shared the salad, conversation flowed more naturally between you. kazuha found herself opening up about her journey as a dancer, her aspirations, and the challenges she faced. it was as if a barrier had been lifted, allowing her to share her thoughts and dreams with someone who truly listened.

in return, you shared your own experiences, your passion for ballet shining through as you spoke. the more you talked, the more kazuha realized just how much you understood each other. your struggles, your dedication, and the unspoken language of movement that connected you both.

kazuha discovered that talking to you was effortless, as if you were two puzzle pieces that fit together perfectly.

when the dawn broke the next morning, you felt a familiar soreness in your legs, but it wasn’t unbearable. it was the sort of ache you got used to. it was barely 6:01, and as you sat up to stretch, you heard rustling noises from the kitchen. 

confusion laced your features at the sounds. your roommate was awake already? was she able to sleep last night? you rubbed your eyes a little and got out of bed, making your way out into the kitchen.

“you’re up early.”

kazuha nearly dropped the frying pan from the sudden sound of your voice. she turned around, slightly flustered, to find you standing at the entrance of the kitchen, your hair tousled from sleep. it seemed that you had been just as surprised by her presence as she was by yours.

"oh, um, good morning," kazuha stammered, trying to regain her composure. "i couldn't sleep much, so i thought i'd make us breakfast."

a small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you walked closer, curiosity glinting in your eyes. this clearly was a different side of your roommate. "that's thoughtful of you. need any help?"

kazuha hesitated for a moment, contemplating whether she should accept your offer or insist on doing it herself. but looking into your warm gaze, she decided to take another small step out of her comfort zone.

"sure, that would be nice," she replied, a shy smile gracing her face. "can you pass me those eggs?"

as you handed her the eggs, the two of you fell into a comfortable rhythm, preparing breakfast together. the kitchen filled with the delightful aroma of sizzling bacon and freshly brewed coffee, while the sun peeked through the curtains, casting a golden glow over the room.

the silence between you two was comfortable, punctuated only by the clinking of utensils and occasional soft laughter. kazuha found herself enjoying your company, feeling a sense of ease she hadn't experienced before.

breakfast was soon ready, and you set the table, creating a cozy atmosphere where the two of you could sit and enjoy the meal together. as you sat down across from each other, kazuha couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude for the connection that was slowly forming between you two.

the conversation flowed effortlessly, touching on various topics as you both shared stories, dreams, and even a few lighthearted jokes. time seemed to slip away as you got lost in each other's company, the initial discomfort and awkwardness long forgotten.

kazuha couldn't deny the growing fondness she felt for you, and it scared her in some ways. but she also realized that she had found someone who understood her, who brought out a side of her she didn't know existed.

it was a small step, but it was a step toward something that she had never done before. and for kazuha, who had always been wary of emotions, it was a significant leap.

as the days went on, it became a small unspoken tradition between the two of you to always make breakfast together. 

days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. kazuha and you grew closer, supporting each other through the highs and lows of pursuing ballet. the once-foreign feelings that kazuha had tried to suppress now blossomed into something beautiful and undeniable.

late-night conversations became a regular occurrence as you both sat on the couch, sharing your dreams, fears, and aspirations. kazuha found solace in your presence, and she discovered a newfound joy in opening up to someone who truly cared. she realized that vulnerability wasn't a weakness, but a strength that allowed for deep connections and emotional growth.

neither of you really knew what to call this slow burning sensation, especially kazuha, but it was something she knew she wanted to feel for a long time.

the more kazuha allowed herself to feel, the more she understood that her initial aversion to feelings was rooted in fear of getting hurt. but with you, she learned that taking risks and embracing emotions could lead to incredible moments of happiness and fulfillment.

you became her confidant, her supporter, and her motivation to push beyond her limits.

it wasn't just about ballet anymore. you understood her on a level that no one else did, and she found solace in the way you listened to her fears and dreams. in your presence, she felt safe to explore the depths of her emotions, even the ones she had long suppressed.

it was your motivated words that made her audition for hybe in december. there had been numerous nights where the two of you talked about how kazuha was losing her love for ballet, and what she should do about it. 

tonight was the night she actually was going to do something about it. 

“come on, zuha.” you whispered softly, holding her phone up ready to record her. the two of you had stayed after hours in one of the practice rooms to film her audition dance. however, the japanese ballerina was suddenly getting cold feet. 

all she had ever known was ballet, and did she really want to leave that behind for a shot in the dark at something new?

a tender smile graced your lips as you reached out to hold her hand, your touch reassuring. "zuha, i understand that you’re nervous. but sometimes, the most beautiful things in life are found outside our comfort zones."

kazuha took a deep breath, her heart pounding in her chest. she gazed into your eyes, finding comfort and encouragement in your support. she felt a surge of courage flowing through her veins.

"remember why you fell in love with dance in the first place," you whispered, your voice filled with unwavering belief. "let that passion guide you and take this leap of faith. i know you have what it takes."

her doubts began to waver in the face of your constant faith. the memory of the joy she once found in ballet, the thrill of the stage, and the desire to express herself through movement flooded her mind. she realized that staying in her comfort zone would only lead to stagnation, while embracing the unknown held the promise of growth and new opportunities.

the japanese girl nodded, a determined glint in her eyes. she pressed the record button on her phone and placed it on a nearby table, framing herself in the center of the camera's view. taking a step back, she positioned herself, her body positioned and ready to dance.

as the music started playing, kazuha immersed herself in the familiar rhythms and melodies. every movement flowed from her heart, a testament to her years of dedication and love for dance. she let go of her fears, allowing the music to guide her as she moved.

in that moment, she felt a sense of liberation. she was no longer bound by the confines of her insecurities and self-doubt. with each movement, she embraced the unknown, trusting in her abilities and the support she had found in both herself and you.

when the dance came to an end, kazuha stood still, her chest heaving, and a mix of exhilaration and vulnerability coursing through her. she glanced at you, a mixture of anticipation and hope in her eyes.

you approached her slowly, your applause echoing in the empty practice room. the pride and admiration in your eyes made her heart swell with happiness. "that was incredible, kazuha," you said, your voice filled with genuine admiration. "you poured your heart into that dance, and it was absolutely mesmerizing."

tears welled up in kazuha's eyes as she realized the magnitude of what she had just accomplished. it wasn't just about the audition; it was about reclaiming her passion, embracing her own potential, and allowing herself to grow beyond her comfort zone.

in that moment, kazuha knew that she had made the right choice, not only in pursuing the audition but also in allowing herself to open up to you and the emotions that had blossomed in between. she had discovered a strength within herself that she never thought possible, and it was all thanks to the support and comfort she had found in you.

no matter what the outcome of the audition would be, kazuha had already won a victory in her heart. she had embraced vulnerability, pursued her dreams, and found a connection with someone who had become her anchor and source of inspiration.

as a few weeks passed, the japanese dancer couldn’t help but feel a bit bummed from the lack of a response from the company. she knew it was a shot in the dark, and that there was a high chance she wouldn’t get in, but she still tried to hold onto that small ounce of faith that you had instilled in her.

in the meantime, you and kazuha had been slowly getting a bit more touchy with each other. 

two weeks ago you leaned against her in the car on the way home. last week, she had her hand on your thigh on the drive to practice. three days ago you two fell asleep on top of each other on the couch after watching “wreck-it ralph” on your shared day off. and just this morning, kazuha went up behind you while you were making breakfast and hugged you, resting her chin on top of your shoulder.

it had gotten to the point where kazuha couldn’t ignore her feelings anymore. and neither could you.

the glow from the living room tv shone over both of your faces. a fuzzy blanket was spread over both of your laps, your head leaning comfortably against the japanese girl’s. kazuha kept her attention on you, eyes tracing your eyelashes and the shape of your nose. 

you felt her burning gaze onto yours, and after a few moments, turned to look up at her. there was a look on your roommate’s face that you had never seen before. concern crossed your features as you questioned it. 

“what is it?” you whispered, making the other girl’s heartbeat pick up. she realized this recently, that you always made her heart race in dangerous patterns and beats. it was part of this new found experience with letting herself feel things fully.

but perhaps the most significant realization for kazuha was that her feelings for you had evolved into something more than friendship. 

she had fallen in love, even if she couldn’t say it out loud yet. it was a feeling that brought her immense happiness, but also carried the weight of uncertainty. she had never felt this way before, and what would happen if by some miracle she got into hybe? would this feeling always feel this way?

however, those thoughts were on the backburner at that moment. kazuha leaned in and pressed her lips against yours.

as kazuha leaned in and kissed you, time seemed to stand still. the world around you faded into the background, and all that mattered was the warmth and tenderness of the kiss. it was a gentle and passionate exchange, filled with the unspoken emotions that had been building between you.

your heart swelled with a mixture of surprise, delight, and reciprocated affection. the taste of her lips, the softness of her touch—it was a moment you had both been longing for, even if neither of you had fully acknowledged it until now.

the kiss spoke volumes, conveying the depth of your connection and the unspoken promises of a future together. in that simple act, the walls that had separated friendship from something more came crumbling down, replaced by an unyielding bond.

when the kiss ended, you both pulled back slightly, your eyes locked in a silent conversation. the room was filled with a charged atmosphere, as if the air itself was buzzing with newfound intimacy and the weight of unspoken questions.

kazuha's gaze was filled with vulnerability and hope as she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. "you make me feel things i can’t explain."

a mixture of emotions swirled within you—joy, excitement, but also a hint of apprehension. you took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts amidst the rush of emotions. but before you could respond, she continued speaking softly.

“all i know is that i want to feel this for a long time."

a genuine smile graced kazuha's lips, her eyes shining with newfound happiness. "kiss me again," you repeated, eyeing her lips as she cupped your cheek with her hand.

in that moment, as you sat there, wrapped in each other's arms and lips locked, you both chose to let your actions speak in place of words. you had each other, and that was enough.

as the glow from the tv continued to bathe the room in a soft light, you both felt each other’s bodies heating up, allowing your lips to dance. it was a kiss filled with promise—a promise to support, cherish, and navigate the complexities of love together.

“zuha,” you whispered softly, breathing against her collarbone as she let her hand wander up your baggy sweatshirt, the same one she had first seen you wearing months ago in the kitchen when you made her that bowl of oatmeal.

kazuha leaned closer to you, kissing the pulsepoint of your neck and brushing your hair to the side so she could get better access to your skin. “i’ve wanted you for so long.” she whispered, admitting that for the first time out loud.

as kazuha's words hung in the air, a surge of emotions washed over you. the admission of her desire and longing stirred a deep longing within your own heart. you felt a mix of elation and relief, knowing that your feelings were reciprocated, that the connection you shared was as profound for her as it was for you.

tilting your head to the side, you allowed kazuha better access to your neck, relishing in the sensation of her soft lips against your skin. each touch, each kiss, ignited a flame of passion and desire that had been building between you. it was as if the floodgates had been opened, and there was no turning back.

the boundaries that had once defined your relationship as roommates were now blurred, replaced by a newfound intimacy that transcended any label or definition.

“come with me.” the japanese girl whispered into your ear, getting off of you and pulling your hand. she hastily turned off the tv and dragged you into her room, shutting the door behind her.

time seemed to melt away as you surrendered yourselves to the waves of pleasure, each touch and caress a testament to the depth of your connection. the love that had blossomed between you had found a physical manifestation, a sacred space where vulnerability and passion intertwined.

whispers of pleasure and sighs of contentment filled the room as you explored each other's bodies, your hands seeking out the curves and contours that had become familiar and yet still held an element of thrilling discovery. 

the next morning, kazuha got the call from hybe.

her phone rang, your head still buried into her bare chest that was littered with crimson marks that you left. she rubbed her eyes and leaned over, grabbing her phone and looking at the unknown caller id. she picked up her phone, answering it after a few rings.

you woke up from the feeling of kazuha practically jumping out of bed, moving you off of her and onto the pillow. “zuha, what are you doing?” you groaned softly, throwing your arm over your eyes.

“i have so much to do, i need to pack.” she rushed out, mumbling softly to herself. “can you go to your room? i need to throw my sheets into the wash.” she added, making your eyes snap open and you sat up immediately.

“what are you talking about?” you whispered, eyeing her with confusion on your face. after what happened between you two last night, you would figure that she would have some sort of different reaction right now.

the japanese girl looked up at you for only a mere moment before she threw a hoodie on. “i need to go somewhere in a few hours.” she said casually, throwing her hair into a loose bun as she rushed around her room.

“where are you going?” you asked, leaning over and putting on your sweater, which was long forgotten last night. “i’ll tell you about it later.” she answered casually, before leaving her room and into the bathroom and closing the door.

you glanced at the clock and realized you should probably use your day off to grab groceries for tonight. besides, you and zuha had agreed yesterday morning to make cinnamon rolls tonight. 

the run to the store went smoothly, and you even managed to get some sunflowers to decorate your living room with. you knew your roommate loved fresh flowers, so you thought it would be a good idea to surprise her with some. on top of that, you even got an extra can of cinnamon roll dough just in case they came out a little too well. (or in case you both messed them up really badly.)

you put your key in the door and unlocked it, stepping inside and startled to see kazuha standing there in the living room with a bunch of bags packed.

as you entered the apartment, the sight of kazuha standing there with her bags packed caught you off guard. the anticipation and confusion swirled within you, making your heart race.

"zuha, what's going on?" you asked, your voice filled with concern. you set the grocery bags down and moved closer to her, trying to catch her gaze.

kazuha avoided your eyes for a moment before finally meeting your gaze, her expression a mix of determination and vulnerability. "i got the call from hybe," she said, her voice trembling slightly. "they want me to join their new girl group."

a surge of emotions swept over you—joy, excitement, and a hint of curiosity. you had known how much this opportunity meant to kazuha, and now it seemed that her dreams were finally being realized. 

however, the thought of her leaving left a pang of longing in your heart. you knew this was coming.

"that's incredible, zuha!" you exclaimed, unable to contain your excitement. "i knew you had it in you. this is your chance to shine."

but as you looked closer, you noticed a hint of uncertainty in kazuha's eyes, mixed with the excitement. "is everything okay?," you asked, your voice filled with concern.

kazuha smiled, but there was a hint of sadness in her eyes. "thank you, but there's more," she said, her voice tinged with apprehension. the idol-to-be bit her lip, her gaze shifting to the floor. "it's just that it happened so fast, and i have to leave today. they want me to start immediately." she explained, her voice tinged with both excitement and apprehension. 

your heart sank as you realized the weight of the situation. the connection you had forged, the budding romance that had just begun to blossom, was now faced with an unexpected hurdle. the thought of being separated from kazuha filled you with a sense of loss.

the news hit you like a wave, and for a moment, you felt a sense of loss wash over you. the prospect of her leaving was a bittersweet reality. you had grown so close, and the thought of not having her by your side every day felt daunting.

"but what about us?" you asked softly, your voice filled with vulnerability. "what about what we have?"

kazuha's gaze softened, and she took a step closer, but keeping distance between you two. "we can’t be together," she admitted, her voice filled with forced honesty. "i can't let this opportunity pass me by. it's a chance to pursue a new dream, and i want to make the most of it."

you nodded, understanding the weight of her words. deep down, you knew she was right. you couldn't stand in the way of her dreams, even if it meant parting ways.

"it’s not you, it’s me. i promise." she continued, her grip on her suitcase tightening. however, kazuha didn’t like the feeling that came after those words left her mouth. this didn’t feel good, but it was the right decision, wasn’t it?

you took a deep breath, trying to process the whirlwind of emotions that swirled within you. "i understand, kazuha." you said, your voice filled with a mix of sadness and acceptance. it felt like your moment last night would only ever exist in your memories now.

kazuha's eyes shimmered with unshed tears as she reached down and picked up a bag on the floor. "thank you for understanding," she whispered as she slung it over her shoulder.

you reached out, your hand trembling slightly, wanting to hold onto her for just a moment longer. "wait," you said softly, your voice filled with a mixture of longing and desperation. "can't we at least try? we don't know what the future holds."

kazuha paused, her eyes filled with conflict. "no," she murmured, her voice barely audible. "this is my dream. i need to do this alone."

tears rolled down your cheek as you stepped closer, only for her to take a step back. "zuha," you whispered, your voice filled with conviction. "i'm willing to stay with you, to support you from afar, to wait for you if that's what it takes."

kazuha's gaze locked with yours, her expression one of determination as she shook her head. "i won’t let you do that," she said, her voice laced with firmness. “i don’t want you to do that.”

your heart shattered as you heard her words, the pain of letting go becoming unbearable. the conflicting emotions within you threatened to consume your entire being, but you understood that you couldn't force her to stay against her will.

with trembling hands, you wiped away your tears and took a step back, giving her the space she needed. "if this is truly what you want, then i won't stand in your way." you said, your voice filled with a mixture of sadness and resignation. 

kazuha's face faltered for a moment, and you could see a hint of internal struggle. a heavy silence filled the room as the weight of the situation settled upon you both. the love you shared was undeniable, but the circumstances had placed insurmountable obstacles in your path.

tears streamed down your face as you mustered the strength to speak your final words. "you deserve to pursue your dreams, and i'll be here, cheering you on, even if it's from a distance."

with a heavy heart, you watched as kazuha picked up her bags, her steps faltering as she made her way to the door. time seemed to stand still as she turned the knob, about to step through when she heard your voice.

"i love you," you whispered, voice filled with profound sadness, and kazuha didn’t like the feeling she got when she heard you. it felt like there was a pit in her stomach.

and i love you, she wanted to reply, but she couldn't. she couldn’t even turn to look at you.

as the door closed behind her, a profound emptiness settled within you. the apartment that had once been filled with laughter and warmth now felt cold and empty. you sank to the floor, overcome by grief and a sense of loss that seemed insurmountable.

the cinnamon rolls and sunflowers you had planned for tonight suddenly were forgotten, just like what you were to kazuha—long forgotten, and no longer something important.

but if only you knew that it was quite the opposite.

kazuha’s arrival in seoul was hard. it was far from what she expected entirely. 

baby, sorry, i left you in the dark

i always reach for your leg over there on your side of the car

the streets were different. the people were different. even car rides were no longer the same. it felt lonely in the backseat of a taxi without you. as a matter of fact, she caught herself reaching for your leg on her left side, only to realize immediately what she was doing out of sheer muscle memory.

the new idol thought she’d grow out of this phase, knowing that she would just adjust like she always did whenever she moved somewhere.

however, she never did.

baby, everything reminds me of you

meeting the other members was something she would never forget. it was a new feeling, but it was a good one for once. feelings like that weren’t common for her anymore. not since she left you, anyway.

good feelings were something she associated with you. but you were no longer here, which made those good feelings feel a lot less enthusiastic.

sakura was her new roommate, and she was really excited to speak more japanese again. the older japanese idol smiled as she walked into the shared room, handing kazuha a roll of cinnamon roll dough.

“let’s make some before yunjin finds out.” she said as eunchae stood behind her, grinning from ear to ear.

kazuha didn’t like the feeling she felt when she saw the can. it reminded her of you immediately. she took a deep breath, trying to push away the memories that flooded her mind at the sight of the cinnamon roll dough. it was a reminder of the countless times you had baked together, sharing laughter and creating sweet memories in the warmth of the kitchen.

she mustered a smile, albeit a slightly forced one, and took the roll from sakura. "sure, let's make some," she replied, trying to hide the ache in her voice. she wanted to embrace the new experiences and friendships that awaited her in this new industry, but the reminders of you made it challenging to fully immerse herself in the present.

as she started to prepare the dough with her other members, kazuha couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt. 

she was supposed to be moving forward, pursuing her dreams and embracing this new chapter of her life. yet, thoughts of you lingered in the corners of her mind, reminding her of the love she had left behind.

as the aroma of freshly baked cinnamon rolls filled the air, the other members of the girl group, including yunjin, joined them in the kitchen. laughter and cheerful chatter filled the room, momentarily distracting kazuha from her inner turmoil.

she glanced at the smiling faces around her, realizing that she wasn't alone. these girls had their own dreams, their own struggles, and they were there to support each other. perhaps, in time, they could become her new source of comfort and companionship.

kazuha mustered a genuine smile this time, feeling a glimmer of hope amidst her lingering sadness. she couldn't deny the connection she felt with the other members, and maybe, just maybe, she could find solace in their friendship.

nobody gets my jokes, everyone here thinks i'm fucking rude

the former ballerina did find solace in these friendships, but there was no one who understood her the way you did. she was one of the quieter members, but she became even more reserved after an awkward interaction with a stranger at the convenience store.

there was a man her age, buying sunflowers. once again, she was reminded of you, but brushed it off. he stood in front of her as she waited in line, waiting to pay for the few items she grabbed.

“those are pretty.” she said out loud, making the man turn around. he smiled with his lips pressed. “there for a funeral.” he replied, making kazuha nod slowly. 

“there’s been a lot of funerals lately, this virus is really something else.” kazuha said sympathetically, making the man in front of her nod in agreement.

“people are dying everyday, i can’t imagine how the morgues look right now.” the stranger added.

“i’m sure they’re dying to get in,” she joked without thinking. of course, she immediately regretted what she said as she looked at the man with wide eyes. “i’m so sorry, i didn’t mean it that way.”

he gave her a dismissive nod before turning in front to step into a different checkout line. kazuha was sure she heard him mumbling something not very nice under his breath as he walked away.

the japanese girl felt embarrassed. she could always joke freely with you, but it seemed like she couldn’t do that here. once again, she felt herself missing your presence. 

when i saw you cry, i didn't handle it well

without you here, i don't know what to do with myself

she would never admit it, but kazuha was often haunted by the look of your tear stained face. it was a memory burned into her mind forever, and almost always she could almost hear the way your voice sounded as she walked out on you.

kazuha carried the weight of those memories with her, each one a constant reminder of what she had left behind. the laughter, the inside jokes, and the warmth of your companionship were all etched deep within her heart.

in the midst of her rising fame as an idol, there were moments when the weight of her decision felt heavier than ever. the applause of the crowd, the adoration of fans, and the success she achieved were meant to bring her happiness, but they couldn't fill the void that you had left.

i think about these things at night before i fall asleep

late at night, when the world around her grew quiet, kazuha often found herself lost in her thoughts. she would sit by the window, gazing at the moon, and let her mind wander to memories of you. the tears would fall silently as she clutched her chest, feeling the ache in her chest grow stronger.

she wondered if she had made the right choice, sacrificing love for her dreams. the fame and recognition she had gained paled in comparison to the love and connection she had lost. the path she had chosen was not without its rewards, but it came at a price she hadn't fully anticipated.

in the midst of her internal struggle, the other members of her group offered their support, their understanding, and their love. they became her new family, standing by her side through the highs and lows of their idol journey. but even in their presence, kazuha couldn't shake the feeling of longing for what she had left behind.

days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and the world continued to spin around her. kazuha's star rose higher, and she became a beloved figure in the industry. her smile dazzled on stage, her talent shone through, but deep down, she carried a secret pain.

but as kazuha faced each new day, she found strength within herself. she knew that she couldn't change the past, no matter how much she longed for it. instead, she focused on the present, cherishing the friendships she had formed and the dreams she was living, even if all she could think about was you.

things i wish you said to me

things like, "darling, i hope you know it scared me to death

the night that your sister said that you got in an accident"

kazuha involved in on stage accident, source music confirms her absence from group activities until further notice.

when kazuha got hurt on stage, all she could think about was if you were going to call and check up on her. of course, she left you, so it wasn’t likely that you would do such a thing.

but she still held onto the delusional idea that you would see the news articles and check up on her. she had never changed her number, just because she wanted you to still have access to her if you wanted it.

she wanted to know you still cared, because she did. she never stopped caring.

"and god, i, i'm watching everything that you do

i can't get your songs out of my head or your hair out of my room"

sometimes kazuha thought about reaching out to you instead. however, her own fears and doubts got the best of her. 

would you still be upset? surely you had to be, she left you like you meant nothing to her. 

just the thought of that sentence made the former ballerina feel disgusting. she couldn’t tell if it was shame or denial, but whatever it was, she did not like it at all.

the playlist you made for her was always something she played in the mornings when she woke up. the songs made her feel a little bit of comfort in these fleeting moments where she had nothing left of you but this.

well, those songs and the stray hairs she sometimes found on her old clothes. kazuha had pulled out one of her old hoodies since the seasons were changing and she wanted to practice in something a bit warmer. but the first thing she noticed was the strand of hair on the collar, in the color of your hair.

it was yet another reminder of what kazuha lost; you. 

but somewhere, deep within her heart, she held onto a glimmer of hope. hope that one day, paths would cross again, and the love that was left behind could be rekindled. 

until then, she would continue to chase her dreams, knowing that she had made a choice that would shape her future, even if it meant sacrificing a feeling that had once been everything to her.

i saw you met somebody and i'm jealous as hell

that i can't even stomach loving somebody else

when kazuha saw you had been announced as the newest member of the korean national ballet, she almost ran out of her room. she scrambled for her socks and a sweater, fumbling because she was so excited.

she finally had an opportunity to see you. after all this time, she finally had a chance to tell you how badly she missed you.

however, then kazuha realized why your name was trending. you were rumored to be dating an idol.

as she scrolled through her feed, she felt a feeling she absolutely did not like. jealousy was another foreign feeling for her, because you never brought it out of her. you always made her feel like she was enough.

the thought of someone else, in her industry, feeling what you made her feel made her want to vomit. she couldn't even stomach loving someone else other than you.

the realization struck her hard. it was a bitter pill to swallow, knowing that she had willingly let go of the love you shared, only to see it potentially being rekindled with someone else.

the jealousy gnawed at her, mixing with a sense of regret. she couldn't help but wonder if she had made a mistake by leaving you behind. perhaps she had let go of something truly special, something that could never be replicated.

but amidst the turmoil of her emotions, kazuha realized that she couldn't change the past. she had made her decision and had chosen her own path. 

it was unfair to hold onto expectations or to assume that you would wait for her indefinitely.

i think about these things at night before i fall asleep

things i wish you said to me

as kazuha lay in bed, the memories of you echoed in her mind. the essence of her thoughts and emotions, reflected the late-night contemplations that consumed her before sleep claimed her weary body.

in the stillness of the night, when the world around her grew quiet, she couldn't help but replay memories of your time together. images of shared laughter, stolen glances, and heartfelt conversations filled her mind, intertwining with the bittersweet memory of what could have been.

each night, as she closed her eyes and sought solace in the realm of dreams, the yearning for the words she wished you had said to her enveloped her heart. she longed to hear you express your love, to feel the warmth of your embrace, and to know that you missed her just as much as she missed you.

in her mind's eye, she imagined the scenarios that never transpired. words of affection and adoration danced on the tip of her tongue, waiting to be released into the ether. but reality reminded her that those words remained unspoken, lost in the vast expanse of what-ifs and missed opportunities.

the weight of unspoken sentiments weighed heavily on her soul, leaving an ache that only deepened as time passed. the silence that now existed between them felt like an unbridgeable chasm, with her unexpressed desires echoing into the void.

yet, even in the midst of her longing, kazuha recognized the futility of dwelling on what could have been. she couldn't force you to say the words she yearned for, nor could she rewrite the past.

sorry, that i pulled the "it's not you, it's me"

one day, i'll make sure you get a real apology

the realization of her actions, fueled by the genuine desire to protect you from the sacrifices she believed would come with staying together, now felt like an inadequate excuse. she understood the hollowness of those words and the pain they caused you.

in the stillness of the night, as regrets and what-ifs filled her mind, kazuha vowed to herself that one day, if given the chance, she would make things right. she yearned to offer you a genuine apology, one that would acknowledge the hurt she inflicted and take responsibility for her actions.

she envisioned a future where she could look into your eyes, not burdened by the weight of pride or fear, and utter the words she had been unable to say before. a sincere apology that would convey her deep remorse and demonstrate her growth and understanding.

kazuha knew that actions speak louder than words, and while a simple apology might not undo the pain of the past, she resolved to make amends through her future actions. she would strive to become a better person, not just for herself, but also for you. and one day, when the time was right, she would ensure that you received the genuine apology you deserved.

with the weight of her promise to herself and the hope of a future reconciliation, kazuha closed her eyes as tears fell, and in that moment, she found solace in the possibility of redemption, and she held onto it tightly, knowing that one day, if she had the opportunity, she would make things right and offer you the heartfelt apology you deserved.

i waste my time, i waste my life on idiotic things

“this is so stupid" she murmured, a tinge of self-disappointment coloring her voice. the weight of missed opportunities and the realization of how she had let fear and insecurity guide her decisions began to weigh heavily on her.

no matter how much success she attained or how many fans cheered her on, there was always a lingering void within kazuha's heart. the achievements and adoration couldn't fill the space that was reserved for the love she had lost.

the memories of you lingered in her mind like a haunting melody, a constant reminder of a time when happiness flowed effortlessly and love enveloped her completely. the moments spent together, the laughter shared, and the depth of connection experienced seemed irreplaceable.

as she stood on stage, bathed in the spotlight, kazuha couldn't help but feel a bittersweet ache. the applause, though gratifying, couldn't compare to the warmth of your embrace or the sound of your voice whispering words of  encouragement in her ear, or the way your lips felt on hers the night before she left.

she couldn't escape the longing for the love she had let slip away. no amount of success or adulation could fill the void left by your absence. and kazuha hated that feeling.

the love that once felt effortless now seemed like an elusive dream, slipping through her fingers and leaving her with a yearning she couldn't shake. truth be told, in those moments of solitude, she regretted becoming an idol entirely.

this wasn’t something she wanted to do anymore because it only made her realize that she loved you even more since the day she walked out on you.

being an idol was pointless in her eyes. the money and fame were no longer something that she wanted. as a matter of fact, it took everything in her to not barge into her manager's office and demand to be removed from the group.

except she didn’t because she knew you wouldn’t want her to do that.

disappointing you was another feeling she hated. and as ironic as it was, and as constant as you were in her mind, you were no longer a feeling she despised.

kazuha loved you, and all the things she felt because of it.

but she lost you, and your love, for pursuing her own feelings. and that mere feeling, made her feel useless.

if you were still here to tell her, you’d probably get upset at her for thinking such a ridiculous thing.

instead, you’d make her cinnamon rolls and bring her sunflowers to help her feel better. you’d tell her to keep going, to take care of herself and to always remember that you were proud of her. 

but you were not here anymore. and all kazuha would hear instead, was the imagination of her mind, painting pictures of the words you’d never say to her, and the one’s she never got to say to you.

“i love you too, y/n.” 

like things you never said

things you'll never say to me

𝐚/𝐧: 𝐢 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐧 <𝟑 (𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐚𝐥 𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐧.)

[nobrashfestivity]

In 1803, a round vessel drifted ashore on the Japanese coast and a beautiful woman emerged, wearing strange clothing and carrying a box. She was unable to communicate with the locals, and her craft was marked with mysterious writing. This story of an utsurobune, or “hollow ship,” in the province of Hitachi (now Ibaraki Prefecture) is found in many records of the Edo period (1603–1868), and Tanaka Kazuo, professor emeritus at Gifu University, has studied the topic for many years. What drew him away from his main research area, applied optics, to investigate this curious episode? And what really took place?

“Like a Flying Saucer”

Tanaka says he began to research the ship after the deadly subway sarin attacks in 1995 by the Aum Shinrikyō cult. “There was a lot of coverage of Aum founder Asahara Shōkō's prophecies and claims to be able to float in the air. Yet the cult’s senior members were part of the scientific elite. I started giving lectures considering paranormal phenomena from a scientific perspective, which meant that I was collecting all kinds of materials for teaching, such as about UFOs in the United States and Japanese folklore. While doing so, I came across the utsurobune legend.” He adds, “Long before the American UFO stories, the craft depicted in Edo-period Japanese documents for some reason looked like a flying saucer. This was fascinating to me.”

UFOs became a modern sensation after the media reported US businessman Kenneth Arnold as having witnessed “flying saucers” on June 24, 1947. A flood of similar stories followed from around the world. Most famously, a UFO was alleged to have crashed to the ground near Roswell, New Mexico, in July 1947. “In the end, though, no wrecks or alien bodies were recovered,” Tanaka says. “There was only the ambiguous testament of witnesses. It was the same with all the other UFO stories from around the world—they were mysteries without any substantial evidence. The utsurobune legend, however, has a number of documents to examine as leads, so in this sense, for researchers it’s a mystery with substance.”

A book published in English by Tanaka Kazuo on his research.  There are similar oral traditions about “hollow ships” across Japan in the Edo period. Tanaka’s research is focused on the various documents that describe the 1803 incident in Hitachi and include illustrations of a beautiful woman and a strange vessel, although they cite different dates. One of the best-known sources is the Toen shōsetsu (Toen Stories), an 1825 collection recording fantastic rumors, which was written by the Toenkai literary circle and edited by Kyokutei Bakin, famous for his lengthy historical romance Nansō Satomi hakkenden (The Eight Dog Chronicles). Others are Nagahashi Matajirō's 1844 work Ume no chiri (Plum Dust), as well as collections like Ōshuku zakki (Ōshuku Notes), Hirokata zuihitsu (Essays by Hirokata), and Hyōryūki-shū (Records of Castaways), which gathers stories of foreign ships washed up in Japan and of Japanese sailors who came ashore overseas.

Picture 1-  Hyōryūki-shū (Records of Castaways) by an unknown author. The text describes the woman as being around 18 to 20 years of age, well-dressed, and beautiful. Her face is pale, and her eyebrows and hair are red. It is impossible to communicate with her, so it is unclear where she is from. She holds a plain wooden box as though it is very important to her and keeps her distance. There is mysterious script written in the boat. (Courtesy Iwase Bunko Library in Nishio, Aichi Prefecture)

Pictures 2 and 3- Unknown (maybe  Mito bunsho)

Picture 4-   From Ōshuku zakki (Ōshuku Notes; around 1815) by Komai Norimura, a vassal of the powerful daimyō Matsudaira Sadanobu. (Courtesy National Diet Library)

Picture 5-  From Hirokata zuihitsu (Essays by Hirokata; 1825) by shogunate retainer and calligrapher Yashiro Hirokata, who was also a member of the Toenkai circle. (Courtesy National Archives of Japan)

This post is mostly sourced from  nippon.com and japantoday

[nanamis-bigtie]

nonsexual acts of intimacy ↬ having their hair washed by the other

❧ higuruma hiromi x gn!reader | cw: domestic fluff, established relationship, nonsexual nudity, implied non-curly hair ❧

Higuruma's apartment balances between the Japanese and western styles, uncontrived and convenient, taking the best out of two worlds. As a lawyer he could easily afford a more "fashionable" one, in a better location and with more space, but as soon as you took the first step past his threshold, you understood why he insisted on staying. 

It's just perfect.

You like the bathroom especially. Despite the whole apartment being on the smaller side, it's actually bigger than the ones you've seen in places of comparable standard, your own included. It's spacious enough for two people to use it at the same time without bumping into each other—and it definitely helps cut down on precious time. Every second spent together matters with such a busy life you both lead.

And besides—

"Need help, love?" Higuruma looks at you through the reflection in the mirror, still bent over the sink as he's just finished washing away the remains of toothpaste. 

Still grimacing, you slowly put your arms down, "Yeah, would love, thanks."

The other stool grates on wet tiles, he sits down behind you and shimmies as close as possible without trapping you too much between his legs. The shower head is taken from your hand; he checks the temperature on his wrist before proceeding, starting at the back of your head to not push the stream into your face.

"What happened?" Higuruma's fingers thread through your hair, divide it into parts to wet the scalp better. Lost in pleasant sensation, of his closeness and gentle yet precise touch, you need the question to be repeated. The first honestly just flew over your head.

"It's just damp and cold." You massage the aching shoulder, the reason behind the whole commotion. "The hinges don't work as well as they used to."

"Don't you dare say you're old." He scoffs and immediately, apologizing for the harsher tone, kisses the back of your neck. "Careful for eyes now—"

Higuruma claims he's not the type to pamper his partner but everything he does for you just disaffirms his words. It's just a simple task of washing your hair but he does everything with religious scrupulousness, following your usual steps to perfection, even if he's never asked for guidance. You must have been observed thoroughly, every time you used his bathroom, his gaze following you from the steamy mirror, from the bathtub, from the door left ajar when he passed you the towel and fresh change of underwear you forgot to take… 

As always, you want to point it out, to tease him until he curls and withdraws, leaving you victorious on the battlefield of teasing banter. As always, thoughts and words leave you as soon as he pours shampoo on top of your head and starts the ritual massage. 

Higuruma's hands, not having the imprint of physical labor, are so soft you simply melt into them. He knows how to press and scratch right within the balance, mindful to not tie your hair into knots nor to pull on it. No wonder you quickly forget about the purpose behind the gentle circles he presses with his fingertips. 

You drown into them, shamelessly arching for more, your back meeting his hairy chest when you lean into him. His laughter, shy and not much louder than a whisper, tickles your sensitive skin.

"Don't fall asleep on me," he kisses the nape of your neck again. "Careful, I'll wash it down now…"

a/n: men with big noses just do everything better, it's engraved in the law. dedicated to @lale-txt for passing me yet another character virus :3

[reallyromealone]

Dadzawa and baby overhaul 2

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐Aizawa and Yamada were thankful it wasn't a school day, Yamada taking an emergency day so the family could get things for little (name).

"Now, what are our thoughts on this?" Yamada asked as they casted their laptop to the livingroom tv, a rainy Sunday meaning they couldn't go out shopping so it was at home shopping.

"I like the one with sheep!" Eri said excited as they looked at sleeper onsies as (name) snuggled in Aizawas arms, little pacifier in his mouth as he lazily watched the screen, enjoying the moving pictures.

(Name) was extremely attached to Aizawa, Eri mentioning how he was only really handled for feedings or changings so he was desperate for contact.

"How about we order some lunch? Then we can move onto furniture" Aizawa said as (name) stretched his little arms up, clearly content in his new dad's arms as the family discussed what they should get for lunch, (name) now sitting up and and bouncing slightly as they spoke.

"What do you think (name)? Western or Japanese food?" Yamada asked the babe, getting close and (name) obviously not understanding what's going on just raised his little arms and reached out to the blond, wanting to be held by him "oh so sweet, western it is!"

The family ordered (fast food) and in the bag Sanza brought was some baby food "let's see..." Shinso said reading the labels and looking a little disgusted at the combinations before spotting a bottle of custard "hey (name)" shinso said cheekily to the baby as everyone ate, (name) sitting his little bum on the carpeted floor.

Aizawa and Yamada were already recording as Shinso got on his stomach and put a baby spoonful to the boys mouth, (name) taking a bite before a shocked expression washed over his face, the boy bouncing slightly and smacking his lips "was that good?" Yamada asked as (name) reached out for the spoon.

"Well at least we know he likes sweets" Shinso said as he let Eri feed the boy a spoonful.

(Name) got five spoonfuls in before he looked like a drunk man on the floor, starfished on the carpet as his dad's took photos.

The day continued, the family ordering baby supplies there were coming the next day and they had called the local furniture store about the possibility of them delivering a baby crib same day, thankfully they didn't have many deliveries so it would be able to come within the next few hours.

(Name) took a nap on the couch as Aizawa and Yamada finished grading papers, the family doing their own thing.

Eri was also taking a small post meal nap as Shinso worked on a project.

"Oh Sho, look" Yamada points to their cats who finally graced them with their presence, the two cats taking note of the tiny baby and the fatter male cat lovingly named "cat" in English flopped beside him and joined in the nap.

The other one went to go eat before sitting on the arm of the couch and watching the tiny baby, leaning over to sniff him.

The two watched as the cats accepted the baby who was fast asleep, kicking his little legs every so often.

When the crib came, the two adults thought it would be best to put it in their room for fast access to the baby if need be, sho laying on the bed with little (name) laying in his chest as Yamada put together the crib.

(Name) stared at Aizawa who stared back, the babe wide eyed before reaching over with his chubby ravioli hands and grabbing Aizawas nose.

Yamazawa family were happy (name) acclimated so well, the boy fitting in like the last piece of the puzzle.

The end of the small vacation would be in a few days and Aizawa already emailed Nedzu about the newest edition.

"ABABABA!" (Name) yelled out at 6am on the dot to his new parents, the little babe making angry baby sounds for food "yeah yeah, I'm coming" Yamada mumbled as he stumbled shirtless to the crib and lifted the boy who snuggled into the warmth of his skin "a hug and a bottle should do you good" he mumbled sleepily as the two went to the kitchen to prepare the little listener a nice meal and some coffee brewing.

"There we go, look at you go" the blond watched tiredly as the babe drank his bottle with only a little assistance from the hero "still can't believe such a little bundle of happiness came from someone so terrible" Yamada mumbled as the babe looked at him with wonder "Eri is really excited to be your big sister, Shinso is even happy about it... You really fit in well"

When (name) finished his bottle, the others trudged out and Aizawa began breakfast as Shinso got himself and his sister some orange juice, the only one happy and awake was little (name) who babbled happily.

The morning was sleepy and calm as Aizawa let the baby try a little miso soup and was pleased at the babes happy reaction.

"His stuffs here" Aizawa said as Shinso took the tiny babe who gently smacked at his face as the adults brought in all the packages "look (name), all for you buddy!" Yamada said sweetly as little Eri helped bring in the obvious clothing packages "there.." "uh dad" Shinso looked at (name) in slight horror as the babe began grunting and looking focused and then a foul smell radiated off the baby.

Freshly changed (name) giggled at Yamadas grossed out face as he threw out the soiled diaper "yeah yeah, very funny" he said teasingly as they opened the packages to figure out what was what, the cats keeping the babe company as they folded all the adorable little clothes for him, the tiny socks and little shirts.

"So when are you guys gonna tell Aunt Nem and Uncle Oboro?" Shinso asked curiously as they cleared out the office that wasn't used much, the heros tending to work in the dining room or keep anything not meant for young eyes at the office.

"When we have him settled, were going to have to bring him tomorrow so they will probably meet him then" Aizawa said simply as he put (name) in a precious kitten onsie and a little cat themed pacifier "look (name)! Toys for you!" Yamada said bringing some freshly cleaned blocks for the babe, a few sound toys to urge him to learn speech.

For now they would just spend time with the tiniest member of the family, putting him in a rolling baby chair as they set stuff up for him.

[mcdonaldsnumberone]

SUNSHOWER!

kaiser never knew you had a best friend outside of blue lock, and atsumu never knew you had befriended someone once you entered blue lock. the two boys come face-to-face for the first time, and they find themselves in an unexpected competition over your heart. 

gender neutral reader

content warning(s): blue lock x haikyuu crossover au, pre-timeskip atsumu

“Darling, who exactly is this?”

Kaiser’s handsome face immediately twisted into an unsightly frown at the sight of you. Which was odd, considering that he was always so quick to break out into his signature smug smile whenever you were around. But today, his face was scrunched up as if he had eaten something nasty, and he showed no signs of letting go of his obvious disgust. 

“‘Darling?’” An incredulous voice repeated the not-so-endearing petname Kaiser had tacked onto you forever ago. A heavy and muscled arm slung itself casually over your shoulders, and while Kaiser had dropped his stupid smirk earlier, an equally annoying grin entered your field of vision. “You never told me you got yourself a boyfriend!”

You bit back the urge to push off the arm hoisted onto you. “I don’t have a boyfriend. It’s just a nickname he has for me.”

“Darling, I asked you a question.” Kaiser didn’t even wait to be formally introduced to the stranger that was practically draping himself over you. The German athlete was already sizing up the other man, and his blue eyes narrowed slightly at the arrogant aura that the stranger was exuding. “Who is this man?”

“I was just about to introduce you two,” you piped up. You gestured towards the boy at your side. “This is my best friend from before Blue Lock. He’s a volleyball player, so that means you two are both athletes! You guys should get along easily! Atsumu, this is Kaiser. Kaiser, Atsumu.” 

“A real pleasure to meet’cha.” The stranger, now known as Atsumu, detached himself from you and stuck a hand out. “You scared me there for a moment. I thought my cute bestie here ran off and actually bagged a boyfriend.”

A wave of hot annoyance washed over Kaiser. It was one thing dealing with you being so frustrating: constantly shutting down his flirtatious behavior, coldly dismissing him, making it clear to Kaiser that you weren’t going to fall backwards to grovel at his feet. But to bring another man into the mix?

Oh, absolutely unacceptable.

Kaiser held his head high and straightened his back, bringing him up to his full height. He puffed his chest out and squared his shoulders, and when he extended his hand to give Atsumu a curt handshake, it was clear that the German boy was sizing your best friend up. In his delusional fantasy world, Kaiser knew that no one could come close to even threatening his position at the top, but that didn’t mean there weren’t people out there who were dreaming of toppling him. Or even worse, snatching his rightful darling from his loving arms.

And Kaiser could see from first glance that Atsumu would be a pretty sizable threat. Atsumu was your best friend from before Blue Lock, which obviously meant that you two were close and that you thought highly of the other man. To make things worse, Atsumu was an attractive young man, almost as attractive as Kaiser! The Japanese boy had coy brown eyes that could tempt anyone who stared at him for too long, well-styled bleached-blond hair, and a lively smile that dangled on the corner of Atsumu’s dainty lips. Just from a glance, Kaiser could tell that Atsumu was an athlete too: underneath the boy’s clothing, the German could easily make out the contours of muscle built up from years of some kind of training.

On the other hand, Atsumu was less than pleased as well. Everyone and their mother knew that Atsumu had been pining after you for years, but instead of picking up on his crystal clear feelings, you had run off to some odd soccer program with all sorts of players not only from Japan but all over the world as well! And Atsumu was livid when you invited him to visit, only to realize that you had gotten all buddy-buddy with some sexy foreigner. If his intuition and whatever he heard from you was correct, this “sexy foreigner” was none other than an up-and-coming professional soccer player in one of the world’s most prestigious clubs.

“Well, I wouldn’t blame you for being so scared,” Kaiser forced a sweet smile onto his face. “They’re so lovely. I’ve only known them for a little bit, but it feels like I’ve already met a soulmate of sorts.”

Ha! Take that!

Atsumu lowered his eyes slightly. Everything about Kaiser oozed confidence. The German boy was tall and well-built, his soccer uniform hugging his body in all the right places to emphasize his abs and strong thighs. Kaiser’s blue eyes complimented the deep sapphire hue of his long hair, and the glimpses of the tattoo that Atsumu could make out over Kaiser’s shoulder could seduce anyone with ease. Atsumu couldn’t stand to lose you to anyone, but let alone some stranger that you had more or less just met!

Nuh-uh. Atsumu hated losing, and he was never going to lose his crush. “Oh, you’d be surprised. I’ve known them for almost my entire life, yet I still learn new sides of them every day. Don’t you think it’s too early to call someone you’ve known for so little as your soulmate?”

You blinked, unimpressed. “Why the hell are you two talking about my soulmate? I have no intentions of settling down, let alone get married or anything. Kaiser, I’m thinking about showing Atsumu around the facility. Are there any places you’d recommend I take him to?”

Kaiser didn’t pay any attention to what you said. Far too preoccupied with not losing to the psychological battle taking place between him and Atsumu, Kaiser pursed his lips slightly and sighed deeply. “Oh, your best friend is just absolutely adorable, darling. Look at how sweet you are, trying to give him a good time. But I’m not sure… Don’t you think your time would be better spent with me instead?”

“What do you mean?” You scrunched your face up. “I haven’t seen Atsumu in months! What’s wrong with me wanting to spend time with him?”

“There’s nothing wrong,” Kaiser feigned concern. “But if you want to give him a comprehensive tour, aren’t there better people to do that? Ah, what was the name of that pretty manager of Blue Lock? Anri, was it? Yes, I’m sure she’ll be able to show your little buddy around much better…”

Atsumu raised a disapproving eyebrow, and the volleyball player frowned. “Hey, watch it, blondie. (Y/n) might let you run that loose tongue of yours around them, but I’m not gonna take any lip from you.”

“Blondie?” Kaiser scoffed, and as if to reiterate his point, he flipped some of his two-toned hair over his shoulder. “I’ll have you know that my blond hair is all natural. Unlike a certain someone here. You could have at least used some toner or something, because your hair is the exact same color as my piss.”

“Yeah, and you won’t be a blond much longer once I rip out every single hair out of your scalp,” Atsumu hissed aggressively at the soccer player. “We’ll see who’s talking big once I finish beating up your ugly ass.”

Kaiser laughed condescendingly, and your stomach twisted in horror as Kaiser’s expression morphed into that sickeningly sadistic grin that he only ever showed during the heat of a rough soccer match. “You? Lay a hand on me? I’d like to see you try. You’re just a nobody. A volleyball player? Please, you’re nothing more than some highschool hero. I could end your career before it even takes off.”

“You’re just a pretty boy who’s all bark and no talk. Those stupid sponsorships and cameras can’t protect you from a good beating. Maybe that’ll knock you down a fucking peg or two.” Atsumu rolled up his sleeves, cracking his fingers loudly. “Are all foreigners this rude? I’ll teach you firsthand how nasty a volleyball player’s punches are.”

You swiftly lodged yourself in between the two snarling boys, using your body as a physical barrier between the two. You gritted your teeth and furrowed your brows, and you flung your arms out as wide as they would go. No matter how strong you were, you knew you couldn’t fend off two athletic teenage boys in their prime, but maybe if you stuck yourself in the middle, that would slow them down from a full-blown fight.

“Okay, split it up, you two!” You glanced over your shoulder to scold Kaiser first for provoking the fight out of nowhere, and you huffed through your nose. “Behave yourself, Kaiser! Atsumu’s my close friend. Can you quit picking a fight with everyone that you meet? Do you not have any shame? I expected better from a professional like you.”

You quickly whipped your head forward to face Atsumu before your friend could properly gloat. “And you, Atsumu! Even if Kaiser picked a fight with you first, you should know better than to fall for it and jump straight to violence! I hate to admit it, but Kaiser’s right. You could get in serious trouble for putting a hand on him.”

“Then what, let him talk to me like that? I’m not gonna let things slide so easily,” Atsumu grumbled, clearly still disgruntled from Kaiser’s sharp tongue. “A little punch isn’t going to kill him.”

Kaiser stuck his tongue out at Atsumu, and you shot the German a glare so icy that Kaiser immediately shoved his tongue back into his mouth and hung his head. 

You exhaled through your mouth defeatedly. You knew that both Kaiser and Atsumu were highly prideful people that hated having their authority questioned in any way, but some foolish part of you deep down had hoped that the two would genuinely get along. 

The two boys were very important to you. Atsumu was someone near and dear to your heart, and no matter how much he wore on your patience, there was no one else on this earth that you trusted more than the obnoxious setter. He was the kind of friend to walk you home after school and use the last of his pocket money to shyly buy you a snack at the convenience store if you complained to him about being hungry. 

Kaiser, in contrast, was someone who exasperated you constantly, yet you couldn’t help but be drawn to him. Maybe it was the way he lavished attention onto you, treating you like some commoner but also his equal in an odd manner. He’d scoop you up in his arms and stare so longingly into your eyes to make your heart skip a beat, only to cackle like a witch and drop you on your butt.

“C’mon, can’t you two at least try to be polite to each other…?” You desperately pleaded. Your bottom lip quivered slightly, and your wide eyes lost a tiny bit of focus. Atsumu’s breath hitched in his throat, and Kaiser froze.

As much as the two hated each other right from the get-go, the last thing either of them wanted to do was upset you to the point where you’d break down crying. They could be as petty and immature as they wanted to be towards each other, but they couldn’t dare disappoint their beloved!

Atsumu grimaces and bites the inside of his cheek. He hated choking back his pride like this, but another stolen glance at your downtrodden face made his heart wrench up in pain. He sidestepped and walked forward past you, and he stared Kaiser square in the face. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn't have threatened to hurt you.” 

Kaiser pressed his lips into a thin line, and he sucked in a tight breath. It was odd for him to feel remorseful for once in his life, but he was going to power through just for you. “...I accept your apology. And I’m sorry as well. It was rude of me to badmouth you like that.”

You let out a comforted exhale, and you clasped your hands to your chest. “Thank god… I wouldn’t know what to do if you guys were to continue fighting! It would have shattered my heart.”

Atsumu laughed mirthfully, and he slung a heavy arm over your shoulders again, bringing you close to his side as if it were second nature to be clinging off of your body. “Well, if anyone breaks your heart, then I’d simply piece it back together for ya. That’s what I’m for, isn’t it? Any bastard that doesn’t treasure you properly deserves to rot in the deepest pits of hell.”

Kaiser scoffed, and he rolled his eyes dramatically as he sidled up to you. He picked up one of your hands, and he brought it to his mouth to press a tender kiss to the back of your knuckles. “If it were up to me, I would never let your heart break in the first place. No need to even worry about having your heart broken if you were to hand it over to Prince Charming…”

Atsumu glared at Kaiser, and Kaiser glared back with equal vitriol. You shook your head, amazed how quickly the two could go snarling at each other like a pair of feral cats duking it out on the street. It was obvious that it was your job to play damage control at this point, lest the two bring down the entire Blue Lock facility spitting poison at one another. 

“Atsumu, Kaiser, behave yourselves!”

x

[sonarspace]

Could we get Geto, Gojo, Nanami and Choso reacting to their artist s/o overworking themselves? Like barely taking any breaks and stuff like that, I need fluff :C thank you 🖤

DAARIN - ダーリン

wc: about 700 a/n: daarin = darling in japanese :D the melody I described here is reflections by toshifumi hinata. i don't know much about that genre of music but it's one of my favorites. sorry if it's not that good i kinda slacked but hope you like it anon :)

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

it was late at night and you were trying to perfect the tempo of a ballad you recorded. you had a deadline of four days but nothing was sounding the way you wanted. two days left now. you've locked yourself in your studio trying to write and record a few melodies to send to your team. only leaving your studio to get yourself a snack or use the bathroom. even your phone is switched off so you could fully immerse yourself into the music. you had one more left. but you just couldn't get it right. you sigh as your head falls down onto the table in front of you. you hear a loud knock and move to open the door.

you’re greeted by the sight of your boyfriend with a big smile on his face and a bag of food in his hand. you return the smile as your head meets his chest and you hold him tight. he puts the bag down and hugs you back. he smells fresh and warm. comforting. "my daarin," he whispers.

the way he holds you with so much delicacy and care has tears brimming your eyes. you pull back and look up at him. you love him so much you think to yourself. and give him a multiple pecks. "ordered some takeout,” he chuckles quietly through your endless kisses. you both sit down on the couch in the studio and catch up. he tells you about the work trip he came back from and asks you about your progress with the project . “you’ve been overworking yourself, again.” he looks at you worriedly. “i’m almost done, but it just doesn’t sound right”. he moves closer to you. his hand scratching your back lightly and then moving up to your neck. he massages the formed knots there and you hum in relief. “why don’t you show me what you’ve got? maybe i can help.” he suggests. you play him the piece and he just stares straight ahead the entire time. start to finish. “soooo what do you think?” you ask him nervously.

it’s a viola melody accompanied by the piano. the viola is main attraction of the piece whilst the piano plays in softened manner in the background. he felt like it was speaking to him. his heart clenched at how pensive it sounded. “it’s beautiful.” he smiles at you sadly. “what was the inspiration?”

“youth. the good and the bad.” you smile back at him. there were moments of melancholy and happiness which you tried incorporating the best way you could in the piece as well. “i love it. i think it sounds perfect the way it is.” he says as his palm holds your cheek. “you really think so?” you ask him. “mhm, being in the studio for two days straight is probably clouding your judgement. you need rest baby.” his thumb strokes your cheek. “hear it back tomorrow and you’ll know.”

“okay, let's go upstairs.” you say to him tiredly. you decide on taking a quick shower. you're looking up at the shower waterfall as you feel his hands on your shoulder. you tilt your head as he leaves a kiss on your neck, your jaw, the side of your face and you exhale contentedly as his hands massage your shoulders. you turn around as his hands move in your hair scratching lightly at your scalp as he helps you wash your hair. he takes a loofah and pours your lavender scented body wash. he plants kisses all over your body as he drags the loofah over your arms, chest and slowly moves down to your abdomen and over your thighs. your heart feels full seeing him take care of you like this. feeding you, helping you, cleaning you up. he helps you out of the shower and into your pjs.

you're both laying in bed facing each other as you cup his cheek and whisper an "i love you". he kisses your wrist "i love you too, sweet girl." and you fall asleep in his arms. content.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

GOJO | GETO | NANAMI | CHOSO | YOUR FAV

© SONARSPACE 2023 | DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, OR REPOST MY WORK ON OTHER PLATFORMS!

[bluelocksource]

Ego Jinpachi’s trivia (src: EGOIST BIBLE)

"You can't be the best striker in the world unless you're the world's most egotistical person."

☆ Character's color: White.

☆ Birthday: 31st March.

☆ Current age: 30.

☆ Zodiac: Aries.

☆ Current height: 189 cm.

☆ Foot size: 28.5cm.

☆ Blood type: AB.

☆ Hobby: Watching soccer, mainly European League.

☆ Favorite food: Cup yakisoba, cup noodle. "I banned them during my active days. These monster junk foods make you gain weight."

☆ Dislike/hated food: Protein. "There's no such thing as tasty protein."

☆ What goes best with rice: "Furikake made from crushed cup yakisoba."

☆ Favorite animal: Bell crickets. "Beautiful chirping sound but a bit gross in appearance."

☆ Favorite season: Other than summer. "You can't play soccer when it's too hot."

☆ Favorite manga: Magical☆Taruruuto-kun. "The work that fried my brain as a kid."

☆ Favorite movie: セッション (Session) "This is what chemical reaction is."

The original movie is called Whiplash (2014). In Japan, it released under the name セッション (Session).

☆ Favorite music: Nighttime background music of a babbling brook and the chirping of insects.

☆ Frequently read magazine: CHICHI (he's a subscriber).

It's a monthly magazine for learning about humanities.

☆ Favorite person: Hiromitsu Ochiai. "I think he's a rational genius."

☆ Favorite subject: P.E. and Psychology.

☆ Weak subject: Art. "I don't want to create art."

☆ Favorite place: Blue Lock Merchandise Sales Department. "They're selling a variety of items."

☆ Mushroom shoots vs Bamboo shoots: Mushroom shoots. "I feel a certain affinity with them."

☆ Ideal type: "Someone who does everything for me."

☆ Fixation: Physiognomy. "I find the faces of people who look hopeless to be irresistibly amusing."

☆ What would make him happy: Japan winning the World Cup.

☆ What would make him upset: "Someone taking football away from me."

☆ What he thinks his strength is: “I have no interest in anything other than soccer.”

☆ What he thinks his weakness is: “I have no interest in anything other than soccer.”

☆ What made him cry recently: “I haven't cried in a while.”

☆ Usual sleeping hour: 4 - 4 -2 (split sleeping style).

☆ Number of chocolates received from previous Valentine: 0 (it's futile).

☆ What he usually ends up buying from convenience store: Check out the new cup yakisoba and cup noodles.

☆ Place he washes first when taking a bath: Pouring hot water onto the crown of his head.

☆ What will he do if received 100 million yen: Strengthening Blue Lock facilities.

☆ How he spent his holiday: Thinking about how Japanese soccer can become the best in the world.

☆ What will he do during his last day on Earth: "Watching what I consider the best game of the Japan national soccer team. Currently, it's the 2005 Confederation Cup against Brazil."

note: i want to apologize in advance for any mistake made in the translation!

[filmbyjy]

LIKE A CAT

PAIRING: yang jungwon x reader (no specified gender)

SUMMARY: visiting the boys was always great especially when you were able to see your sweet boyfriend. however, what you didn’t expect was for yang jungwon to fall asleep on your lap. maybe it was the jet lag that got him.

GENRE: fluff!!!! it’s also decently short so yeah :(

NOTE: this is just a drabble. i was playing with the prompt generator and it gave me ‘jungwon falls asleep in reader's lap and reader has a conversation with someone else while stroking jungwon's hair as if they were a sleeping cat’ and my brain went !!!!! perfect for jungwon and so yeah here is this

with the boys piling into their dorms with their luggages in their hands, you thought it was a great idea to come over and possibly spend quality time with them.

it had been too long since you’ve seen them. especially your dear boyfriend who was busy burying his face at the crook of your neck. the moment he had opened the door with tired and droopy eyes, his face instantly lit up and he threw himself onto you.

“i missed you.” he says.

yang jungwon wasn’t one to really voice out his affection, rather he would show it to you. however, he truly missed you so what better way then to mutter those words out directly.

“ooo look at him being all lovey dovey.” sunoo teases. jungwon groans softly, enough for you to hear.

“okay, enough with the teasing. i’m sure all of you are tired. i brought snacks and maybe we can watch a movie.”

“boring, let’s play games.” ni-ki smirks. the boys playfully shoved ni-ki.

“is that the only thing you care about? we just came back from a world tour and we still have our japanese promotions soon. are you not jet lagged?” jay says. ni-ki pouts.

“but..games.” he gives jay the best puppy eyes he could muster. jay groans.

“fine, just go play. i’m going to wash up first.” he waves ni-ki off before going over to take a shower.

“yay!!!” ni-ki jumps in happiness.

you feel small pecks on your shoulder. right, jungwon had been hugging you this whole time. you let go of the hug and faced him. he pouts before holding out his arms for you.

“i’m sure you’re hungry, babe.” you say. jungwon shakes his head.

“no. i want hug.” you hear the boys snort.

“go on, hug your dear boyfriend.”

“by the way, he keeps mentioning how much he misses you when I bunked in the same room as him.” sunghoon mentions.

“really?” you turned to jungwon. “you missed me a lot, huh?”

“yes, now can i please get a hug or at least a kiss. you haven’t kissed me today, angel.” jungwon huffs.

“oh god. save me from this.” heeseung hurls. you rolled your eyes at the boy. you grabbed jungwon’s hands and pulled him to the living room.

he settles down on the couch before wrapping his arms around your waist and laying on your chest. your hands fall onto his scalp, playing with his hair that was slightly frizzled since he did dye his hair. overall, it was still fluffy in your opinion.

jake decided to settle right next to you and so you fell into a deep convo with him as you played with jungwon’s hair. you could feel jungwon’s weight change and you heard light snores coming from him. to which, you bite down a growing smile because of how adorable jungwon was.

“hey, did jungwon just fell asleep?” jake asks.

“yeah.”

“oh? he just talked about having insomnia and not getting enough sleep while we were in america for tour?” jake mentions.

you looked down at the boy. he was sleeping soundly, only moving slightly to nuzzle his head further onto your chest. you finally let out a smile.

“guess he must’ve been extremely tired.”

“he sleeps like a cat.” jake adds.

“yeah…he does.”

your adorable cat.