#Because School

[voidcxltist]

SINFUL DELIGHTS: THE SHIPS!

Ayo! We're finally speaking of something I think it's important, our cult's ships! And, as for now, we have five confirmed!

Narilamb

Name for fics: RedDead (Redemption /jk)

~ Status: Husbands

This is obviously one

Shamgoat

Name for fics: Nightcrawlers (because spiders and goats walk on anything)

- Status: Partners

matter of fact, I'm thinking if they should be a QPR for being the total opposite of Narinder and Abel, or if to leave them as an only romantical relationship, thus meaning they're both asexual but do feel romantic attraction

Juket

Name for fics: Silentlove

- Status: Fiancés

Heket & Judes, silly thing, considering that originally, Judes was named Jules and he was a trans dog guy, should I change it to be like that or not?

Darikallyrn

Name for fics: MonstrousTrio

- Status: Something.

Darius, Tayrn & Kallamar are partners that doesn 5 act like partners but also are and... well, they just are!

Caleshy

Name for fics: Leafcat

- Status: Partners

Calix and Leshy! Both of them agreed to an open relationship and Leshy since he's somewhat like the whore easygoing of the cult, priorizes his cat over anyone else

Extras

Selob

Name for fics: Spidershroom

- Status: Yet to think but very unstable

Helob and Sozo, I'm actually thinking if they should be an ustable relationship that fights and break up and come back every time, or just toxic old men yaoi /jk

Shamulob

Name for fics: SpiderDuo

- Status: They broke up :(

Lambgoat

Name for fics: AssholesDuo

- Status: When they found out they were technically silibings they were too grossed out and disgusted by the idea they actually took distance for a time

More to announce!

P.S. Tagged the living daylights out of this BAHAHA

[hollyhomburg]

( vent post) i think a lot of my pent up stress these days comes from my car accident. growing up and when things where particularly bad my abuser would try and hit me with his car a lot when i was walking home from school. i say a lot but it probably happened a dozen times over the course of 5 years like- not that often, but the issue was that i'd never know when he was driving by if he was going to try and hit me so i was kinda always on edge.

and then when i got my licensee it was all of a sudden 'now i can hit him if he tries anything' and that was bad too because he'd jump out in front of my car a lot to try and get me to stop and talk to him. my car became my safe space and a kind of fortress all round me that i knew would keep him from getting to me, and even if he tried in 10 seconds i could be 100's of feet from him.

but since my accident i haven't been able to relax while driving or play bts loud, because the car i'm driving now is my moms and if anything happens to it we're fucked, it's so big and long and i have to be concentrating the entire time while i'm driving it because the streets on my commute are very narrow, and it's very gas inefficient so i can't come and go without thought.

i just miss my little honda :( i miss that place of freedom, i miss being able to just vibe and get to where i need to go without worrying about running out of gas or how much it was going to be to fill it up.

[scentedinksandwhackedseals]

to not exactly quote muna:

i just know this august is gonna fucking suck.

[glacymash45]

Hey, everyone! So, I just wanna say that I’ll be doing a crossover between Kingdom Hearts and Amphibia since I managed to binge watch it and it’s really great! It takes place post KH3 and it’s gonna be about 50 chapters, but that may change in the future. It’s called Hearts of Amphibia.

Here’s the list:

Chapter 1: Meeting New Faces. Chapter 2: The King Chapter 3: The Lights and The Plantars Part 1 Chapter 4: The Lights and The Plantars Part 2 Chapter 5: Road to Newtopia Chapter 6: Handy Kairi and Anne/Fort in the Road Chapter 7: The Ballad of Lea and Hopediah/Anne and Aqua Hunter Chapter 8: Truck Stop Ven ‘n Polly/A Caravan Named Destiny Chapter 9: Quarreler’s Pass/Toadcatcher. Chapter 10: Swamp and Sensibility/Wax Museum Chapter 11: Marcy and Sora at The Gates Chapter 12: Scavenger Hunt/The Plantars and Lights Check In Chapter 13: Lost in Newtopia/Sprig and Roxas Get Schooled Chapter 14: Little Frogtown/Hopping Mall Chapter 15: The Sleepover to End All Sleepovers/A Day at The Aquarium Chapter 16: The Shut-In! Chapter 17: Night Drivers/Return to Wartwood Chapter 18: Ivy on the Run/After the Rain Chapter 19: The First Temple Chapter 20: New Wartwood/Friend or Frobo? Chapter 21: Toad to Redemption/Maddie, Marcy and Namine Chapter 22: The Second Temple/Barrel’s Warhammer Chapter 23: Bessie and Micro-Angelo/The Third Temple Chapter 24: The Dinner/Battle of The Bands Chapter 25: Maleficent and Pete Chapter 26: True Colors Chapter 27: The New Normal Chapter 28: Pop ‘Til You Drop/Turning Point Chapter 29: Thai Feud/Adventures in Catsitting Chapter 30: Fight at the Museum/Temple Frogs and Lights Chapter 31: Fixing Frobo/Riku and Anne-Sterminator Chapter 32: Mr. X/Sprig’s Birthday Chapter 33: Confrontation with Old Foes Chapter 34: Spider-Sprig and Bat-Ven/Olivia, Yunan, Riku, and Kairi Chapter 35: Hollywood Hop Pop and Lea/If you give a Frog or Light a Cookie… Chapter 36: The Great Christmas Chapter 37: Heartless Invasion Chapter 38: Escape to Amphibia Chapter 39: Commander Anne and Riku/Sprivy Chapter 40: Sasha and Terra’s Angels/Olm Town Road Chapter 41: Mother of Olms/Grime and Aqua’s Pupil Chapter 42: The New Body Chapter 43: The Master and The King Chapter 44: The Core and The King/The Root of Evil Chapter 45: Newts in Tights Chapter 46: Fight or Flight Chapter 47: The Three Armies/The Beginning of the End Chapter 48: All In Chapter 49: The Hardest Thing Chapter 50: Epilogue

I’ve already finished chapters 1 and 2, and will start chapter 3 this Friday. If you have any questions or suggestions for the chapters, please let me know. This is my first big fanfic, so it will really mean a lot if you support it.

[inbabylontheywept]

i did wrestling in middle school. on one hand, i was actually quite good at it, which was nice. being good at any sport was a new achievement for me. on the other hand, i was bi, and i was trying very hard not to notice that i was bi, and getting folded into knots by very kind, very muscular dorks made that task somewhat difficult.

adding fire to the problem was that my parents and my grandparents wanted to watch my matches, because they were very proud that their Gangly Nerd Son was actually Sporting, and they wanted to cheer me on. which would've been sweet and all, but if there are four people you do not want there during a key part of your Burgeoning Sexual Awakening, it is your mom and your dad and your grandma and your grandpa.

right? i mean, imagine some guy's got your head in his armpit, and you're going you know, old sweat smells bad, but fresh sweat has a sort of and then you make eye contact with your grandpa in the stands and you remember you're swearing spandex so if you pop a boner people aren't just going to be able to see the outline, they're going to be able to count the veins, and the only way you will be able to restore your family's honor after that would be by moving to siberia and renouncing joy, forever. that, or lift your entire body up by your kneck then twist 180 degrees without paralyzing yourself.

it’s a lot of pressure, is what i’m saying.

still it did motivate me to win my matches really fast. because i was so tall and skinny, i was stupidly good at the double leg takedown, and then once someone was knocked down, i'd just do the half nelson and kind of flip em over for the pin. then the ref would count to three and i’d win. EZPZ.

i had one match where that went great. won in the first ten seconds, sat back down, and prepared myself for a good hour or two of doing fuck all. didn't even feel bad the parents/grandparents were gonna be bored. the matches went up from me in 5 pound increments (i was in the 115 lbs division) and it was going great until we got to the 145 lbs division. the other school's wrestler stepped onto the mat, and she turned out to be a girl so our guy flipped, because for straight guys, wrestling a girl is not a pleasant experience.

i'm not entirely unsympathetic. my experience wrestling dudes was definitely a little traumatic. but also, i dealt. guy could've dealt too. instead, he refused to wrestle, and the coach went - fine. not even worth fighting over.

so he went to the 140 pounder, and that guy said, nosir, my mom said mormons can't wrestle girls. next guy down, 135 pounder, now he knew he could pull the same card and thus did. 130 pounder, 125, both tapped out. he got to the 120 guy, and that guy was catholic, but he said he was considering being mormon, and thus would have to pass. as a precaution.

coach blew up a little at that. he said "is there anyone - anyone - on this entire goddamn team that is willing to wrestle a girl?" and then he pointed at me and said "YOU. MAT. GO."

and i'll be real, if i'd been paying more attention, i'd have pulled the mormon card too, but i'd just been putting all that audio into a buffer file because i was reading, so i was halfway across the mat before i even processed what had been said and by then it was too late to turn back.

still i had a plan. and my plan - my beautiful, perfect plan - was to do what i'd always done. tackle, flip, pin, win. sit down. read. bore my family to death. move on.

i got the first part right. she was bigger than me, but she wasn't taller. just an incredibly stout woman. god built me like a snake with glasses, just as he built her like a combat cube. the problem was the half nelson. soon as she was down, i tried hooking my arm under hers from behind and for both genders, the defense for this move is just clamping your arms really fucking tight against your sides. if you're a guy, that's whatever, but if you're a girl - especially if you're god's chosen combat cube - that pins your opponents hand right against your boob.

so, i got the hook in, she clamped, my whole arm pressed against something soft, my coach was yelling THE HALF NELSON. BABYLON! JUST FINISH IT! FINISH THE HALF NELSON! and i was just trying to press hard enough to finish, when then my brain went

...oh.

and i flipped out. of course i flipped out. i like girls, and touching a boob is an elemental experience, and i was not ready. i was not prepared. i had not committed the sacred rites. i recoiled like i'd just brushed my arm against the surface of the sun, stood up, and backed away. nobody in the room knew why i'd given up. all they saw was me, right about to win, suddenly flailing around and scrambling. so everyone started screaming at me to just get the half nelson again, and i couldn't really yell back there's a fuckin' boob in the way and it was very distressing, and the only way i could think of to make them stop was just doing it over again the right way.

so i did.

i hunkered down and prepared myself for Wrasslin' Attempt #2: The Sequel.

i knocked her down again, EZPZ. i went for the half nelson again, but she knew what i was about to do so she super clamped, and i knew she was gonna super clamp, so i wound my arm back like a pop-eye cartoon punch before swinging my arm through the gap between her bicep and her side, but the amount of time i spent winding back super signalled what i was about to to do, which gave her time to clamp even harder, which somehow redirected the entire force of the popeye punch to the bottom of her bra.

it spat out a single boob the same way an action hero might spit out one single tooth after getting a solid crack across the jaw. as if to say:

*ptooie.* "that all you got?"

i did not actually see this. my experience was that first there was an arm, then there was a bit of boob, but i was braced, i was ready, forward at all costs, tatakae motherfuckers, and then the boob went away, and i didn't know where it went but my team, and the audience, and everyone who was in front of me, they all gasped like i just kicked them in the stomach. except for my coach. he was behind me, and thus one of the four people in the room who did not see the boob. now my mom, my dad, my grandma, and my grandpa, they all got flashed but nooooooo, coach thunderbutt was behind me, and he didn't see shit so he was still yelling NOOOOOO BABYLON WHAT ARE YOU DOING JUST FINISH THE NELSON! GO FOR THE KILL! BABYLON! BABYLON!

but i did not go for the kill. i stood up and she stuffed her boob back real fast, and we just kind of circled each other awkwardly until time ran out and i won on points. that's not technically allowed, but the ref had some mercy on me.

my coach did not.

i barely had time to sit down before he strode over to the bench to chew me out.

"babylon," he said, in that very calm way people get when they're too pissed to yell. "why didn't you pin?"

and i didn't know how to say well coach, i tried, but there was a boob, and it kept getting in the way, and my mom was watching, and so was my dad, and so was his dad, and his mom, and god (like bible god) and that's a can of worms because i'm pretty sure he was already mad at me, and i'm wearing spandex, and i think i might have to move to siberia, so instead i said

"i uh. i forgot how to do the half nelson."

which is actually impossible. forgetting how to do the half nelson is like forgetting how to swallow your spit.

and he looked at me, like i was the dumbest person in the entire world, and i looked through him like i'd just survived my 250th day in a trench at verdun, and he said: fine.

fine.

but we're all going to practice it for an hour tomorrow because you forgot.

and then he left.

and my buddies had the gall to be salty about it. i got so many comments saying "dude, why didn't you just tell him the truth?" and i said "you can if you care so damn much. you could've wrestled the girl too. maybe someone else should do the hard thing today."

but they didn't. so the next day, we did an hour of half nelson drills, and i spent a decent amount of time getting thrown around the mat, and it was pleasant in exactly the way that i hated and the year after that, to the surprise of everyone but myself, i quit wrestling and joined the trivia team.

and if you want more reasons to love my mom, my grandpa joked after the match that i might have to talk to my bishop about it, and my mom told him he would be allowed to make jokes after he stood in front of a crowd of 110 people in spandex underpants while wrestling a woman that was not his wife.

he paused for almost five seconds after that. then he said: aw. hell. sorry babylon.

and i'd have preferred my apology from god, but getting it from him was pretty good too.

[marypsue]

Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.

All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.

[deviouscrackers]

this masm upload looks funny

[hrokkall]

We are so bat

[egophiliac]

bring back zooterkins, the best 17th-century swear word

I don't normally do Just Characters Swearing, but. ...this kind of wrote itself and then wouldn't leave my head. it comes from both a piece of character-writing advice that has always stuck with me, and also my conviction that Leona is 1000% funnier as a character if his dialogue has to stay G-rated. let Kalim say fuck, but don't let Leona say bastard.

(I'm sorry)

[nyaa]

via

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:

michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club

*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***

that's it that's the movie

outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative

actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.

aka Michael Myers Is A Republican

but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too

also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain

side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty

i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978

(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)

oh no he's hot

[indigo6f00ff]

need to share an experience i had 30 minutes ago

(edit: thanks to @walks-the-ages for providing and reminding me to put alt text, sorry it slips my mind alot lol)

[wanologic]

and they were roommates