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analogwriting · 6 months

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Star-Crossed

Chapter 18: Core

Donquixote Rosinante x gn!reader word count: 3.5k a/n: uh, sorry it's been so long. life's been wiiiiild lmao first|next

Time went by quickly. The staff operated as if nothing happened - as if they hadn’t just been out for over a week. They were acting like it was just another run of the mill day and you were grateful for that.

No one tried to get in contact with this side of the hospital. Well, one person did, but it was just a check in that was easily faked. It was also only a couple of hours, so it wasn’t like you had a lot of time for things to happen.

It felt too easy, but if Corazon was right, your father was banking on you being out for the count for a while. So unless Doflamingo were to somehow get ahold of him, he'd be none the wiser. The man must've thought he could take you on his own and didn't notify anyone you were here earlier. Good thing he had such a massive ego. It worked in your favor.

“Alright, get ready. It's shift change,” you said to one of your staff members. “Gather up a few more and we'll head over. I'm going to keep watch to see who comes in.” After all, you didn't want to get any innocents involved.

You watched the screens, making note of who came and went. It seemed like it was a lot of your normal night staff, but with some of your father's men sprinkled in. Probably only about a handful. Nothing you couldn't handle.

“Ready?” You looked over as one of your staff members poked their head in, you nodded. “There's about five of my father's men. The rest are normal staff.” They nodded as you headed towards the door.

“Follow my lead. Just like before. We should be able to take care of this quickly.” Unfortunately, however, it was going to be a bit harder. You didn't have a series of tunnels on that side of the hospital, so you dressed in scrubs, including a mask and bouffant cap. You couldn't risk anyone recognizing you. Your staff could get by in just normal scrubs luckily.

You and three other staff members went with you to the front side of the hospital. You went in through the main entrance, acting like you were rolling in for your shift.

You were greeted by the night receptionist. You waved at him, heading further into the hospital. You and the three others you were with spread out. You had debriefed them quickly on who was on this side that didn't belong. “Make sure to report to my office in an hour,” you muttered to the three of them. They all nodded and you went your separate ways.

“Doctor, you're back?” You tensed, moving quickly. You grabbed whomever it was, pulling them into the storage closet, covering their mouth. It was Nico Robin. She didn't look scared or startled by your actions, however.

“I can't let anyone know I'm here,” you said quietly.

She nodded in understanding and you removed your hand from her mouth. “Sorry about that.”

“It's quite alright. I knew something was up when you and Marco stopped showing up. Along with the boys. All of us staff did. Then new people rolled in, claiming new management. Glad to see you back.” She had a relaxed smile and you wondered why the hell she was so calm. Most people would be freaking out by now.

“We're not as in the dark as you think, doctor. Not anymore at least. The newcomers aren't bright and talk very loud. And you know this place is a hub for gossip.”

You couldn't help but smile from under your mask. “Well, it's nice to know people were still willing to stay.”

“Of course we did. We all knew you'd come back for us. Even if it took some time. Besides, they mostly left us alone and let us operate how we usually did.” She shrugged, folding her arms across her chest.

That was good. You had been worried that they'd completely overturn the place, at least they seemed to have trusted your staff on the front side to keep things operating. Though, Robin and your staff’s trust in you coming back meant the world to you. You had no idea they held you in such high regards. Everything was slowly being put into perspective for you.

You owed everyone so much at this point. You were already planning on giving everyone some extra vacation days and some gifts because this was insane.

“There is one girl who is going around barking orders, but she doesn't seem to know the first thing about being a doctor.” Robin gave an amused laugh, shaking her head. “I think her name was Trinity? I'm not sure. I never paid much attention to her. However, she's out today.”

You felt your blood boil at the mention of her. Not necessarily at her, though. She was a victim and barely even an adult. Your blood boiled because you still couldn't believe your father. You couldn't believe he completely sired and raised a child all this time without you knowing. That he specifically kept it from you as well.

You shoved those thoughts away. “Sorry again, Robin. Thank you for everything. I'll let you go.”

Robin just smiled her easy going smile and nodded. “It's quite alright, just like I said. Good luck, doctor.” With that, she left.

You stayed there a moment longer, taking a deep breath. It was absolutely nerve wracking right now. Plus, how the hell did Robin immediately recognize you? You thought you were completely covered. Maybe Robin was just really good at recognizing people. That's what you hoped anyway. You somewhat banked on that hope.

After recollecting yourself, you headed out of the storage closet like nothing happened, continuing back towards your office. “Is it just radio silence over there?” You heard a voice coming from your office and you slowed down, sticking close to the wall as you listened from around the corner.

“Yeah. I haven't been able to get ahold of anyone for a couple of hours. I figured they were busy, but I'm starting to get worried. They did check in, but nothing else. Which isn’t normal.” Ah, shit.

From the sounds of the voices, it was your father's right hand men, Daniel and Gabriel. You felt your chest tighten. These men were practically your uncles, they helped raise you, but they treated you just as coldly as your father did now.

You took a deep breath before quieting your racing heart so you could listen.

“You don't think they're back to take over the hospital, do you?”

“Nah, that's impossible. The boss made sure to crush their spirit. Besides, they signed the papers. Even if they tried to take things back, in the face of the law, the hospital isn't theirs anymore. I'm sure they're busy fixing someone up. I heard there was a shootout earlier today anyway.”

You felt your blood boil even more. So, Corazon was right. Your father was banking on psychological warfare. How could you do such a thing to your own child? You still couldn’t believe he’d go so far. It was disgusting honestly. All this for what?

“If they would've just stopped with their stupid fantasyland, we wouldn't be in this situation.” A sigh could be heard. You felt your eye twitch.

“That's true. They have no one to blame but themselves.” A laugh. “For a doctor, they sure are dumb.” Both of them started laughing.

Oh, you were going to fuck them up royally. You didn't care that these men helped raise you. These weren't the caring uncles you grew up with. Those men were dead - fake.

“Wait, what's that on the camera? Is someone listening?” Shit. Well, there was no hiding now. You ripped off your mask and bouffant.

You rounded the corner, pulling out your gun, training it at them and they did the same to you. You shot once, getting one of them in the leg. Daniel cried out, kneeling on the ground. With one hand he covered the wound, with the other he pointed his gun at you.

“What are you doing here?” You could hear slight fear in Gabriel's voice. It was true. Your father’s men did fear you. At least a little bit. You glared at the both of them.

“What the fuck does it look like? I'm taking my hospital back.”

“You can't. You signed it over.”

“Did I?”

You let another gunshot fly, getting Gabriel in the arm. He dodged, the bullet only grazing him. Shit. You heard another gunshot, dodging and rolling to the side. You shot the doorstop, making your door close so that no loose bullets could hit innocent passersbys. At least they had been smart enough to have silencers, so there wouldn’t be too much noise.

Your office was a good size, but it wasn't exactly a good size for a shootout. No place indoors would be. You needed to end this quickly. Right now it was a stalemate. The two of them behind the desk and you in front. You had to think. What to do… There were two of them and only one of you. Then an idea popped into your head.

With a deep breath, you shot at your metal cabinet, the bullet ricocheting and shooting behind the desk. You heard one of them cry out and a gun skitter to the floor. Luckily, they hadn’t been standing so the gun didn’t accidentally go off. “Gabriel!” You stood up quickly, pointing your gun at the otherside.

You saw Gabriel laying there on the ground, crumpled. Daniel was shaking him, but the man wasn’t moving. “He’s dead, Daniel.” You didn’t have to look to see. The rapidly accumulating blood on the floor told you enough. Must’ve gotten him in the neck.

The man looked at you with rage in his eyes. He turned, aiming his gun at you and just shooting blindly. Never shoot when blind with emotion - your father taught you that. First lesson. Luckily, you were able to predict that he was going to react like that, quickly ducking back behind the desk while the bullets made their way into your ceiling. They stopped in the softer tiles instead of bouncing off of them.

“How could you do such a thing, y/n?” You could hear the distress in his voice and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes. “Says the man who was just shooting me,” you mumbled.

“We’re supposed to be family. Does that mean nothing to you? Gabriel even helped teach you how to drive a car. How could you treat him so coldly?” You sat there, astonished.

Was he really trying to guilt you right now? That was fucking rich.

You rounded the corner of your desk and before Daniel could even turn, you sent your fist into his face. The shock alone was enough to loosen his grip on his own gun and you snatched it out of his hands like taking a toy from a toddler.

You took him by the collar and pulled him in closer, glaring at him. “Are you really trying to use that on me right now? The two men who treated me like a stranger when I came to visit? The two men who just tried to kill me? The two men who were just banking on my mental breakdown to keep me from coming back?” You shook your head.

“Family means nothing to the likes of you. That much is clear.”

“Y/n, please. Don’t do this. Think of all the good times we’ve had.” You acted like you were going to think about it, standing up and letting him go. He went to reach for Gabriel’s gun and you shot him in the head with a sigh. “Pathetic.”

Your therapist was going to be going into overtime. You were going to probably pay them extra these next few sessions. Maybe also get in a couple extra sessions. You had a lot of things to work through.

You closed your eyes, taking a moment. You were trying your best to keep it together right now, but you honestly felt like you were about to explode. This was the worst. Everything turned out so shitty. Everything had fallen apart so fast but…

Your mind shifted to what you did have. Pops and Marco. Corazon. Your staff. You just regained control over your hospital. Everything would sort itself out. You were sure.

After a moment of internal crisis, you glanced over to the desktop, checking the cameras. It seemed everyone else was apprehended as well. You saw them all knocked out and tied up in one of the conference rooms that was currently closed off.

“There’s still one missing.” Your staff came into the office. Had it been an hour already? Shit, time was flying. “I’ll go look for them. Someone keep an eye on the others, one patrol the halls, and the other stay here and keep an eye on these two. They’re dead, but mostly make sure no one else wanders in to see them - and keep an eye on the cameras.” The three of them nodded and you turned to head out first.

You headed down the hallway. Everything was pretty quiet for the most part. It was late enough in the night that most, if not all, of the patients were asleep. It was a skeleton crew of staff as well. It was calm, eerily calm. Even though you had just murdered two men in cold blood in your office, things were oddly serene and it made you uneasy. You were just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You suddenly felt someone yank you into an empty room and hands around your throat. Oh sweet fuck. You struggled for a second, clawing and trying to get them to let go. You saw it was another person from your father’s crew, the one you had just been looking for. Well, you found them at least.

Black started to encroach on the edges of your vision as you started seeing stars. Fuck, fuck, fuck. You decided to drop your weight, startling them into loosening their grip and you gasped, beginning to cough and rolling a away from them to give yourself space. You felt them run over to you, stepping over you to straddle you but you didn’t stop moving long enough to let them succeed and you shoved them backwards as you sat up, sending them tumbling.

You quickly darted over to them and before they could gather themselves and stand up, you brought their head down onto the floor, knocking them out cold. You were panting as you sat down on the floor next to their unconscious body. Fuck, that was close. You rubbed your throat, just knowing it was probably going to bruise. Any longer and they probably would’ve done some serious damage to your windpipe too.

You closed your eyes, flopping on the ground to catch your breath. Man, this was exhausting. You just wanted to sleep.

You let yourself catch your breath before taking your assailant and tying them up, sticking them with the others. At this point, it was starting to get light outside. You didn’t even realize that much time had passed. Maybe you passed out for a minute there without realizing.

Now, everything was running like it used to. You called in all the staff you had from the underground side of the hospital. They were stationed on both sides, keeping an eye on things. You would probably have to keep security up for the time being until you would resolve this issue once and for all.

With Doflamingo out of commission for the most part and Crocodile straight up out of the picture, you weren’t sure there was really much else to do besides confront your father. You just weren’t sure how you were going to do that.

“So, you really did it, huh?” You turned around, seeing Marco walking into your office. You’d long since cleaned up the mess you made earlier. You felt weirdly numb about everything. Maybe it hadn’t fully sunk in yet. Some things still felt like a bad dream.

“I suppose I did,” you responded in a monotonous voice. You were painfully exhausted. Going from a hermit and depressive episode straight into action and fighting wasn’t exactly easy to do. Your entire body ached and you longed for sleep. “Wait, what are you doing here?” It just dawned on you - you didn’t call him.

“You should head home and get some rest,” Marco said with a frown as he examined you, ignoring your question. “Oh, that looks rough.” His eyes were on your neck. “That bad?” He nodded in response. You had been so busy making sure everyone else was okay and that the intruders were taken care of in a discreet manner that you hadn’t even had time to look at your own injuries. You know your had a few grazes from bullets as well that you hadn’t tended to just yet either.

“There’s still so much for me to do.”

“Well, run it over with me and I’ll take over. We can hold it from here.” You just looked at Marco, debating on whether or not to do just that.

Marco shook his head. “Sorry. I phrased that like you had a choice. I’m telling you to do it and that you are going to go home and rest after.” You were honestly so exhausted that you didn’t even argue with him.

For the most part, everything was taken care of. The intruders had been disposed of. Doflamingo was taken care of and sent back to his people in the terrible state he was stuck in. You had also made sure he knew that the hospital was still in your name. They had no legal hold in the issue.

Right now, it was just making sure that no one else tried to take things over. It was a waiting game for most things to blow over. You weren’t sure if the families were going to try to retaliate or not.

You filled Marco in on everything, walking him through things as he patched you up. You had called in all your staff and even called in some older staff that had retired. Just to see if they’d help watch over the hospital. Luckily, they were all willing to help and you had extra security around the clock. At least for a little while.

Now, it was your turn to rest. You almost just collapsed in the breakroom, but you knew that Corazon was probably worried about you right now. Marco had mentioned something about him wanting to come but Marco had talked him out of it.

“I told him that you would need motivation to go home and he’d be great motivation.” That had only made your face turn bright red. He wasn’t wrong, nothing was more enticing than the thought of curling up in bed with your boyfriend right now…he was your boyfriend, right? You two didn’t officially say anything, but you assumed as much.

Fuck, you were two tired to think.

You weren’t even fully there on the way home either. You blinked and you were in front of Pops’ house. Did you drive here? You were behind the wheel so you guessed you did. Maybe you really just zoned out. At least you didn’t get hurt and neither did anyone else.

You weren’t going to do that again.

You slowly climbed out of the car, the adrenaline leaving your body. Everything felt like it was made of stone and you were sluggish in your movements. Not too much further. You yawned, stretching. As you stepped towards the gates, they opened, revealing Corazon. He immediately took your face in his hands and kissed you hard. It was now your turn to make a noise of surprise.

He picked you up, spinning you around in excitement. “You’re okay!”

Oh, sweet jesus you were going to throw up. “Oh fuck, please put me down. I’m going to hurl.”

“Oh, sorry.” He put you down with a frown. You shook your head. “It’s okay. Not your fault. I already felt like shit.” You took a deep breath, shaking your head. “I’m good now.” Corazon frowned as he seemed to notice the bruising on your neck. His fingers lightly traced the skin and you felt your breathing hitch.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” he mumbled.

Before you could say anything, you felt the hair on the back of your neck stand up and you shoved him through the opening of the gate. “Get down!” You heard two gunshots go off and a car speed off before pain immediately seared in your back and shoulder. It was so intense that you weren’t even sure where it was originating exactly.

The world began to spin immediately as your body started growing cold and numb. Oh fuck. It wasn’t your spine. You were sure it was your shoulder and maybe your waist. Nothing too damaging - you hoped. Not that you were able to think much before your entire world went black.

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kennahjune · 8 months

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Was Having Some Thoughts

Was having some thoughts about Steve and Barb and how their personalities would’ve probably lined up so well had Barb not died.

Then I was thinking of writing a canon-divergence AU with alive Barb.

Then I thought: ghost Barb.

And now here we are.

Barb who, after dying in the Upside Down, returns to the Harrington Estate against her Will and essentially scaring the ever-loving fuck out of Steve.

Turns out, for some fucked up reason, Barb is tied to Steve.

Literally everything in the show stays the same (mostly) but with ghost Barb hovering over Steve’s shoulder and judging his every move. She likes Robin so fucking much when they both first meet her at Scoops (cause— unfortunately— wherever Steve goes Barb goes).

But where they both play it off as absolutely hating each other and just down right loathing the fact that they’re literally spiritually bonded, they both would also die for each other (in a sense).

Like Barb will call Steve a whore and Steve will shoot right back calling her a bitch but Barbs also there for the worst of Steve’s nightmares and migraines and Steve’s there for when Barb feels useless and just needs to talk.

The fuckery that is the Spring Break From Hell happens and it ends with Max and Eddie both well and alive cause fuck the canon.

But it also ends with Barb being tangible and actually there in the topside.

Idk

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #barb holland #steve has trauma #barb usually makes fun of him for it #unless shit gets real #cause she’s good with social cues #barb and steve friendship I’ve oddly been craving #barb and nancy #cause duh #barb and robin shoulda met #they’d be besties fr #steve hates when they interact after robin’s in the know #cause they’re usually teasing and making fun of him #barb and mike friendship to #cause I said so

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rainyraisin · 1 year

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Fanart for @rottmnt-residuum because I’ve been reading it for a good while now and I’ve always wanted to make fanart but I was too scared to ask if I was allowed hgfhbjghvbj

But turns out the creator likes fanart so yay!!! :D

I didn’t really have any ideas though so uh have a quick shitpost based on the @tmntaucompetition

He’s trying to figure out if he can throw a basketball at Bishop without getting caught 💪💪💪

I promise I’ll do an actual drawing at some point gfhjgyffjh

#love residuum sm sm it’s so good AH #residuum Donnie my love #goofy guy #the angst is so INCREDIBLE fr!!!!#residuum au #me whenever I see any residuum content whatsoever: :DDDD!!!#I’m bad at thinking of pose ideas I’m hoping it isn’t obvious ghjgffhhg #he slays those jeans fr #u go bestie #fashionable even whilst in holding within a government facility #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #rise donnie #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt fanart #he’s ballin’ fr!!!!

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kuromi-hoemie · 2 months

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feel like I've genuinely spent at least a quarter of my day too horny to think. i was going to do some kind of art today but I've been thinking about the boy...

#for like the third day in a row #me: I've gotten so much hotter fr like i'm SO hot now and i was already hot i can't believe this #me when a friend who knew me from before says he thinks I'm hot: buddy what do you MEAN??¿?¿¿ 😵‍💫😵 really?? 👉🏾👈🏾#i enjoy his friendship and his company ♡⁠ and i don't want to make it weird so i needed to cool off for a couple hours (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠)#i just kinda asked him if he wants anything more of me and what his boundaries are :3c and we can go frm there #i don't like to drive myself crazy wondering and letting a crush build. i nip it in the bud before it consumes me by just asking 😌#this isn't my first crush on him but i did keep the other ones to myself.. he's different 👉🏾👈🏾 but things r p different these days #and it's been a while since we've last seen each other. I've never been more attracted to him than i am now 😵‍💫😵‍💫#what happened.. wait no we have been getting closer i suppose. I remember always wanting to know him more in our #friend group back then and i feels rly nice to actually understand him more these days (❁´◡`❁) ♡ to be seen and understood myself.#it's a whole thing lol but basically i split off frm our old group then he kinda got kicked out and the group fell apart #but then we reconnected months later and we're better friends than we've ever been :3 i like him and appreciate him either way ♡⁠#😮‍💨 having a crush on someone is so exhilarating yet exhausting lmaoo. he's a good boy though i like himmm ʕ⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴥ⁠ꈍ⁠ʔ #ougggh... waaaahh.... auhgggghhhhggggg........#i haven't had a crush on someone in a while (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠) I've been blissfully hanging w my bestie but he keeps getting me #god..

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art-emis99 · 1 year

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i am going insane

#was going to do a more polished art piece but i couldnt get a good composition n stuff #so it was silly art time #ive been a federation jaiden truther since before the missions started i am so happy #jaiden got two besties for the price of one fr fr #qsmp #qsmp cucurucho #q!cucurucho #qsmp fanart #my art-emis99

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imaginaryanon · 11 months

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does con o'neill even know his portrayal of izzy hands, s1 and s2 both, has changed my fucking life. does he know. i need him to know that

#oh god besties i went out and bought some rum (yk. pirate vibes) and i'm drunk and crying jgdfhkjfd what a fucking mess #but yk. despite The Fucking Circumstances (ep8 that is) i'm still so incredibly fucking emotional and thankful for All Of It #the gorgeous queer romance. the vibrant queer characters who feel Just Like Me Fr. and this goes out to all the cast & crew & writers #but. again. Considering The Circumstances. mr o'neill sir if you're out there i want to bake you a fucking cake.#i might like. cry on it a little. but please try to disregard that it's all for love #personal blah #ofmd #ofmd spoilers #izzy hands #yeah this is me trying to switch from Angry And Despairing (tm) to Thankful now since being angry and despairing is simply no good for me #and i love this show so fuckin much still. yk. Despite. </3

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theghoulboysblog · 6 days

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The part in this week’s pod watcher where Shane says “I outta knock your teeth out.” And they proceeded to laugh hysterically. They both know it doesn’t mean anything, all jokes but also, it’s because Shane is like the least intimidating person ever 😂

thank you for bringing this up anon cause it’s something i find apsolutely lovely about them! though shane and ryan joke, it is so clear that they trust each other so fully and understand that the other would never hurt them 😭💛

the way they burst out laughing cause they both know that the mere idea of shane, gentle giant, least intimidating man alive, hurting anyone, but even more so ryan, is so insanely comical! he couldn’t seem intimidating even if he tried 😭🙏

it actually brings me back to this buzzfeed unsolved postmortem where shane threatens to punch ryan and fakes him out TWICE and ryan doesn’t even slightly flinch. shane is shocked and is like “he… he didn’t flinch???” but like ofc he didn’t flinch 😭 he knows shane, “the man he would trust holding his newborn and the ONLY person he would trust to rob a bank with him” knows shane would literally never hit him 😭💛

and i mean the proof is in the pudding, cause this is the way shane reacted when he accidentally hit ryan’s finger! he was playing angry and being jokingly annoyed with ryan before this, so he stamped ryan’s passport hard, and he accidentally smacked ryan’s finger with the stamp! he immediately dropped his angry facade and was like “shit are you okay!?!”

like oh shane you sweet soft man. i’m sorry but we ALL know how much you love ryan and how desperate you are to keep him safe and healthy 😭🙏 nobody is intimidated by you dude 😔🙏

#lmfao #aly answers #besties fr #shane: i outta knock your teeth out 😠#also shane: he was cold so i gave him my coat during my solo ☺️#also also shane: not letting ryan do things during investigations that may actually get him hurt #also also also shane: “during real life i like to make sure he’s feelin good :3”#like oh shane you loving man

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coriander-candlesticks · 3 months

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I'm sick so I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense, but I've been thinking about the nature of myths recently as I've been exploring hellenic polytheism.

For context: I'm ex-Mormon. I was raised in the church and, because of that, was taught biblical literalism but in, like, a more subtle way than most? I was raised believing that Adam & Eve and Noah's Ark, etc., were literally true, but that the story of Job specifically was not; I also always knew evolution and the Big Bang to be correct, despite there being a verse in the Doctrine & Covenants (a Mormon-specific religious book) where God apparently told Joseph Smith that the world is 6,000 years old- a passage I didn't know existed until my senior year of high school. I didn't realize I had believed in biblical literalism until I'd left the church, actually.

Now that I'm aware of it, it's a mindset I'm actively trying to combat while I explore Hellenic polytheism. It's definitely been a task to separate the nature of the Gods from their myths, as brutal as they often are. And it's something I've noticed within the community, too, which I think is interesting. It makes sense: Christianity, at least, has had a chokehold on much of the world for a long time, and so many of us have experienced literalism as our first interaction with any sort of holy text (though, of course, Greek myths as a whole aren't that) alongside our first experience with divinity as a wrathful God whose flaws are waved away, or ignored, or twisted into positive attributes. This also means that I'm trying to re-approach several deities with an open mind (Zeus, Hera, and Ares in particular, but many of them to some extent) while also trying to un-condition myself. I was already in the process of doing this, of course, but trying to figure out how to interact with a completely different pantheon has made that especially clear.

It extends to things like prayer and offerings, too. Prayers were very formulaic growing up, even though most of the time there wasn't a strict script to follow. There was always something you ask as part of the prayer, even if it's just 'please help me do better tomorrow' (alongside giving thanks, of course), so trying to craft a prayer without adding *everything* I'm used to including in makes it feel incomplete and, therefore, disrespectful. And daily prayer is something I'm resistant to because of prior experiences with it. I don't want to offend any of the gods by asking for something or asking for too much, especially so early on, and there's always a promised offering the few times I *have* asked. Add worries about exact obedience on top of that and it's proving to be a difficult thing to untangle. And I know that the gods are difficult to offend, figuring out how to do this takes trial & error and that's okay, it'll get better the more I do it, etc., etc.; this is more an issue with my own overthinking than anything else (hooray for ✨ mental health issues ✨). I'm not really asking for advice here, necessarily, just thinking out loud because I'm not comfortable talking to people in meat space about it yet.

#also: the whole thing about cleanliness? as someone w/ mental health issues? Rough. very rough. what counts? how individualized is it?#if i cant get my room (where my shrines are/will be) clean does that mean i cant give any offerings?#is just washing my hands and/or veiling actually okay most of the time? even when ive been struggling to shower?#when does something require a change of clothes? or do i have to do that every time i offer something at any point in the day?#including meal/drink (ex steam from tea) offerings? i dont have that many clothes besties #if im pouring out an offering to hermes on my way home from work do i have to somehow wash my hands first b/c i just got off public transit #can i pour it directly from my water bottle or do i have to keep a little separate bottle of water just for libations?#and like. i know logically the answer is 'do whatever you can and you'll figure it out' but it hasnt sunk in yet #it's always...interesting when a new layer of religious trauma tm gets discovered #also. maybe it's just the 'tism but 'just jump in!' and 'go slow at the beginning' seem contradictory to me #like. you cant do both??? i dont think??? 'just jump in' is the answer ive been getting when i do tarot so im trying to do that #also. doubts? not offending a deity??? wild concept. just. the hardest thing to wrap my head around. mormon god's ego is FRAGILE fr #hellenic pagan #helpol #hellenic polytheism #not adding exmo tags b/c i dont have a good enough handle on the community here & im too sick to deal with people being weird about this #my post #coriander says #seeing people get into the theological weeds is cool from the outside (see: that 'can spiderman do superhero stuff on the sabbath' post)#but very stressful when there's not centuries on centuries of detailed information to draw from & everyone's just trying to figure shit out #in a world that's *very* different from the one the information we *do* have was written down in #christianity cw #mormonism cw

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jamespottersheadphones · 1 year

Text

definitive roles of james potter's friends in the potter family

effie and monty: parents

james, marlene, sirius, regulus: kids

lily, remus, peter: cousins

#the potters collect kids with bad parents like theyre stamps #effie is the bruce wayne of the marauders world #monty and reggie are besties fr #james potter #remuslupin #sirius black #marlene mckinnon #regulus black #lily evans #peter pettigrew #euphemia potter #monty potter #where are the slytherin skittles you say? they run away from good parental figures so well that they're qualified for the olympics #reggie was recruited against his will but he loves it

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whoblewboobear · 2 months

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📓 💙 if you have the spoons

Hi, Clem!!

Ough! Okay yes! So the other day I was thinking about a very cute friends to lovers au for JacePorter where it’s like if Rhett and Link from GMM were like actually romantically together but not until much later in their careers. So here we go 💖

Jace and Porter have been inseparable since the 1st grade. The way Jace tells it, little Ambrose Bellgate kept making fun of his ears so new kid Porter threw a pencil at the little brat and told him to leave Jace alone.

Porter remembers it differently, that Jace DEFINITELY joined in on the pencils throwing because he was a menace of a 7 year old. It ended with a crying Ambrose and both Jace and Porter stuck inside during recess. They make the most of it though by reading a comic Porter snagged from his brother’s collection and sharing the fruit snacks Jace’s mom packed for him that morning.

They still bicker about the details of that story even though they have countless more from middle school, high school, college, and even more documented throughout their shared YouTube career.

Even after all these years they still do everything together, so much so that fans speculate about how they could still be that close after 30 years. If it’s been that long they must be in love right?

Much to Jace’s dismay they aren’t.

He has, however, been hopelessly and embarrassingly in love with his best friend since high school. He thought things would change when he started dating his first boyfriend but he squarely fucked that up when he moaned Porter’s name during his first time. He’d hoped his feelings would die down when Porter started seeing his first girlfriend. But then there was another and another and Jace just found himself jealous of every single girlfriend and still in love with his completely oblivious best friend.

He didn’t think anything between them could be a possibility until he watched Porter sneak off with a guy in a club bathroom during college. He pointedly doesn’t ask, but it does give him a tiny ounce of hope.

Present day, Jace is unhappily married, Porter is contently divorced and maybe one night in their shared office Jace is still buzzing from the office party they threw to celebrate a wrap on season 20 of their morning show. Porter stumbles through the door drunk and giddy and plops down next to Jace on their couch.

Somehow in the haze of alcohol and fuzzy feelings Jace found his way into Porter’s lap and Porter can’t get enough of the sounds Jace is making. And Gods, somewhere in his stupor he’s back in college listening to Jace getting railed in the next room over while he jerks off wishing it were him in that room instead of whatever douchey asshole boyfriend Jace had at the time.

But then Jace is kissing down his neck and fuck the past, he wants to live in the now, where Jace is grinding down hard on him and he has a slight pink tint to his cheeks from the alcohol and all he can think of is how gorgeous he looks right now. How good Jace’s lips feel against his how- How Jace is married… and this probably isn’t okay. Porter doesn’t like Jace’s stupid idiot husband Ambrose (yes, that Ambrose. Typical Jace to marry his bully much to Porter’s fucking dismay.)

But he’s not about to fuck up Jace’s relationship over one drunken make out. So he pulls away. And he doesn’t miss the small pout that crosses Jace’s lips before he’s climbing off of him and saying he’s sorry. And Porter looks at him, like really looks at him and takes his hand.

“You don’t have to be, I liked it.” And that’s all Porter needs to say before Jace is mentally signing the divorce papers. Because fuck Ambrose. He still makes fun of his ears and they’ve had more arguments than Jace could count about how he gets to fuck off to his “little fantasyland” (Fuck you, Ambrose 🙄🔪) with Porter, while he works a shitty 9-5 he hates. It’s not Jace’s fault, he told him he makes more than enough to provide for the both of them, but of COURSE Ambrose took issue with that too like he does with-

“Hey, hey calm down, look at me. Breathe.” Porter can tell he’s thinking, running through every little scenario in his head because Jace is prone to worrying. It’s why they work so well together. Jace worries and Porter reminds him everything will be okay. Always. Just like he is now. Once Jace heart has slowed to an acceptable pace, Porter holds Jace’s hands in his and asks, “Are you sure, Stardiamond.”

Jace nods and for the first time in years, he truly has everything he’s ever wanted.

#Thank you for this bc this is truly my most indulgent au that I will never write LMAO #Porter is so nice to Jace in this one fr. Like if you know the Rhett and link dynamic it’s that level of ribbing and teasing ur bestie #but if anyone messes with Jace it’s a wrap and vice versa but Jace is also like link in that he only confronts situations if it would be #funny #And Jace gets to be peak weird while Porter plays the straight man in their videos it’s just SOO good #also yeah they totally kissed through glass like that one gmm episode and now it’s a bit for Jace to feed Porter strawberries #but when does a bit stop being a bit? When you go home and get railed by your husband wishing it was your life long bff #that’s when 🥰#asks #italicized-oh #starbreaker

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