#Aroace Sam… a concept…

[quietwingsinthesky]

fuck u *queerplatonics your samifer*

[aroaessidhe]

aro & ace books: parents or parent figures/mentors

in some of these the parent/mentor relationship is central, in some it's just one aspect!

Sailing By Orion's Star - 3 aroace MCs, one is a mentor figure to the other two (& parent figure to other kids)

A Promise Broken - MC is an aroace man who's adopted his niece

Of The Wild - MC is ace, and adoptive parent of a bunch of fey kids

Màgòdiz - one of the 6 MCs is an aroace person who's a parent/mentor to a bunch of kids

Bang Bang Bohdisattva - two MCs, one is an ace man who's a parent/mentor figure to the other

Kaikeyi - MC is an aroace woman and mother

The Thread That Binds - aroace MCs with demi/greyaro mentor figures

Fallen Thorns - aroace MC with an older aroace mentor figure

Breasts and Eggs - MC is an ace woman questioning asexuality & motherhood/donor conception

The Last Hour Between Worlds - MC is lightly demi-coded and has a newborn daughter

An Accident of Stars - secondary MC is aromantic and a mother

The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester - MC's dad is aroace

Seeing Colour (in Everything Under The Moon) - aro MC and older aro relative/mentor figure

#aspec books / aspec database / tumblr masterpost

[krislgfox]

So, here's quick concepts of Sam, Jade and User from my Farm au! :_]

Some facts about Jade and User(since I already made info about Sam) under below↓

Jade:

-In this au she's mechanic

-She's 30 years old

-As it's already written she's 6'2ft tall(188cm)

-She's lesbian and ace

-Usually she's the one who's very busy right when something special happens

-Knitting is her hobby

User:

-They're decided to live with this gang bcz yes

-The text on the head is able to change to other texts, like "bruh", "ouch", "hehe", "damn" and ect

-The "hair clips" can change its color to Users fav color(I just use my fav color, okie?)

-Can't really hold anything with their "hands"

-As it's already written, they're 5'11ft tall(179cm)

-They're sizeshifter

-They're nonbinary and aroace

-Is it shorts or skirt?

-No shoes only socks

[remidyal]

Game Changer Season 6 episodes, ranked by my personal enjoyment

Because I also enjoy arbitrarily ranking things! If you disagree... I mean, that's fine? I liked every episode this season, just.. I liked some episodes better than others. I'm grouping the Ratfish episodes together, so we've got eight entries. Spoilers for, um, every game changer episode this season, obviously.

#8 Pencils Down:

I'm not as into drawings and all as I am a lot of the other stuff, though this was probably the most wholesome episode of this season. I'm, naturally, opposed to wholesomeness too.

Favorite bit:

The proposed tattoos were a lot of fun.

#7 Ratfish (parts 1 and 2):

I think this one got hurt for me by a couple things - I know absolutely nothing about the show they're mimicking, unlike Survivor or the Bachelor, and I did not particularly enjoy anything directly to do with the Ratfish or understand why I should care about his opinions and arbitrary decisions. I assumed that the cast would recognize who this person was and we'd get some kind of payoff there, but nope. Everything just between the cast was great, though.

Favorite bit:

Honestly there's a ton of quick moments to choose from here, but I think my favorite is Brennan incorrectly going for the seat marked Brennan Lee Mulligan at the end.

#6 The Newlyweb Game:

This one was gentle good fun, I enjoyed everyone involved, there were just more standout moments in some of the later episodes on this list. This is fighting with Pencils Down for the most wholesome episode, or at least the one that would least fit into a saw trap. In spite of that this would be the episode all time of Game Changer I would least be willing to be on, even in the world where I'm not firmly aroace and have a partner - I think I would sooner light myself on fire than let someone I know have full access to my phone.

Favorite bit:

Revealing how many unread emails people had and the shock and judgement at totally reasonable numbers, as someone with around forty thousand unread emails in my primary gmail account dating back to 2004.

#5 Bingo

We're really into tough competition now! I loved this episode, and that it somehow turned into a tormenting Brennan episode even though he wasn't even supposed to be there. This was obviously slightly rigged so that the players in the third set of Bingo were most likely to win (and it was actually impossible for the people on stage) but honestly pulling it off was so good.

Favorite Bit:

I mean, it's the reveal to Trapp and everyone of the existence of the third group of course.

#4 Second Place

First, I know that for meta reasons this should be second, but it's not. Oh well. Sam alleges that this episode wasn't intentionally meant to torment Brennan; I do not believe Sam's lies. Everyone in the world saw the twist at the end coming and it's still funny.

Favorite bit:

Ally declaring that Brennan can ring the gong the loudest and Brennan's brain breaking harder than anything that Sam had actually planned.

#3 Sam Says 3

I can't believe this one's only third. If this is how Sam Says ends - and I have a hard time seeing how a fourth edition can escalate, even outside of the BTS claiming that they see three times as the limit for the same premise most of the time - then what an ending. I'm not sure any other game concept has managed to make the players so consistently tricked. My only critique of it is that I think I like the first couple times at this well just a little bit more, with nothing in this quite matching Ally flying to New York or the Something We'll Have To Bleep energy for me.

Favorite Bit:

It's hard to top the fake Sam body dropping from the ceiling.

#2 Beat the Buzzer

Every episode with the Seven cast is always incredible, and production-wise this seems like the craziest thing they've ever pulled off. Any episode where they break out of just the stage is always good, and I think this is the most extensive use of that they've ever done. Incredible variety, great cameos from Aabria and Persephone, complete manic energy from all three contestants. A+ episode.

Favorite Bit:

There's so much here, but I think mine as someone who worked as a pizza delivery driver was the entire exchange where Rehka just ends up getting the bag with the buzzer and a bunch of loose oreos. Was production prepared with everything that was on that menu or would they have actually ordered breadsticks somewhere to use as a prop?

#1 Deja Vu

Time loop stuff is always a favorite of mine, and pulling one off as an episode is ALREADY a great premise before you even get into all of the other cast and the editing. (Shout out to Siobhan Thompson for being in exactly two Game Changer episodes and them being this one and Escape the Green Room; guess we know what pepper rating she puts down.) Great chemistry between the cast, a truly deranged display from Sam, and of course the Wenis. Genuinely the WEIRDEST episode of the season, too, always a good sign.

It's a shame they already repeated the premise too much to do a follow up to this one...

Favorite Bit(s):

I'm doing two for this one because it's my list and I can.

"This isn't fucking Um, Actually!" with sincere righteous anger.

Everything to do with Zac as Grant, most of all how easy it would have been to just make that Zac as Zac.

[h-didanart]

Question: How many AU Bloodmoons do you have?

BOY AINT THAT A GOOD QUESTION

*slams three notebooks, an iPad, and the phone on the table*

LET US FIND OUT!

Bloodmoons that I have written or drawn about in public platforms where their existences can be confirmed:

Five pairs and a single, these are:

Everyone is alive, for some reason- My takes on Bloodmoon I and Bloodmoon II that appear on a one shot I wrote and a concept I shared here; Dagger and Rifle (placeholder name, I don’t know what else to call him :(), Rabies and Bleed

The Moon and Sun show- The ones from my swap au, which I am still counting because Fang has exactly one line which was meant as foreshadowing tho I don’t know if it worked cuz no one mentioned it; Scythe and Fang

The Bloodmoon One- The ones from… that au (which for some reason I made an alternate timeline for where they’re humans); Bloody and Harvest

Get in losers- The ones from my more silly au where everyone joins the family; Hunter and Harvest

The bffs- The one that got separated and became Jack’s friend, or has Jack as his emotional support bot, and the root world of the Virus!Jack event; Original

Those are the guys you guys can figure out I made rather easily.

Now, having looked through my notebooks and writing spaces, and counting the six Bloodmoons we already have:

Sixteen pairs, two singles, one trio, and one quartet

That’s eleven pairs, one single, one trio, and one quartet more than what you guys know.

Let’s get into their lore, shall we?:

The tree at face value- I was experimenting with family set ups for the Celestials and decided to take things literally, Bloodmoon here would be the child of Eclipse. They were never named.

Creator sucks, deluxe edition- okay, okay, this one is weird, and I’ll admit I wasn’t really thinking it through when I made the concept, ergo it will probably come off as insensitive and weird, which is understandable because I was not thinking through what I was thinking. So, human au, Sun and Moon and Lunar have DID, both Bloodmoons are Lunar’s alters. That’s it. This is one of the two aus in which the twins are younger than 20. Lunar, Hunter, and Harvest.

The RaTc (pronounced ‘rats’)- short for ‘Redhead and traumatized club’, basically a place where I drop all my favorites//ocs that have so many things in common that I can refer to them as being ‘the same guy’. Bloodmoon II was the latest addition. Original and Adaptation

Uno-less afterlife- my take on the ghost versions of the dead SAMS characters, I’m planning to write a one shot for this one when Sun dies (or if, I guess). There’s the first Bloodmoon who’s half melted and kinda disintegrating, and the newer addition of a mutilated Adaptation II. Original and Adaptation, Copy Adaptation

This is what you wanted- that concept I shared sometime last month (?), Bloodmoon wanting to get reprogrammed and getting Eclipse to help them, and then getting amnesia. Ruby and Scarlet

DND mini phase- a simple doodle of Bloodmoon as a vampiric rogue, thing which I don’t even know if it’s possible. They weren’t named

Death game- … I may have watched a Danganronpa let’s play. Look, the concept is neat, and the character designs are cool as hell! That said, I did plan a whole au revolving around the SAMS characters being put in a death game, I’m pretty sure I planned to have the twins kill someone and get away with it because of a loop hole. Bloody and Harvest

Fantasy au- not restricted but definitely inspired by DnD, a magical world where there’s all sorts of creatures and places. The Bloodmoons were vampires that Eclipse got to work for him, and then got out of control. Ruin revived them as a demon on account of being a necromancer. Neither the first or second versions were named

Pure and utter regret- I… I might’ve… I might’ve shipped the twins and Jack at some point— It was a crackship and I don’t even ship them anymore, I‘ve adopted the ‘Bloodmoon is aroace’ headcanon, and y’know, canon is being canon for Jack. They’re really just friends now. Yet, I still have about three digital pages worth of them being all kissy and shit. I feel like shit. Fuck, I even had a name for them. I hate myself. They go by every single name ever given to a Bloodmoon (because this was purely a fun crack ship)

April fools actor au- exactly as it says, Sun and Moon started thinking of ways to bring engagement up for the channel, and then Eclipse popped up, and so they all ran the channel together, bouncing ideas off of one another, and so began the lore episodes. Bloodmoon is a bot that was made by Eclipse from some scraps of code he did originally intend to use to mess with the Celestial twins, now repurposed into a theatre kid. They probably have names but they’re only referred to as Original and Adaptation

I got infected by Magic Girlitis- I was watching a bunch of videos about Madoka Magica, and then I watched the ‘Will you press the button’ video, so now I have magical girl designs for Moon, Sun, and Lunar. I never got to them, but the blood twins would’ve had a really cool introduction and would’ve been a genuinely scary antagonist to our heroes. They weren’t named

Fragment of the ocean- I asked a friend of mine what I should draw for Mermay, they said mermaids and oceanic creatures, I accidentally created an au. Bloodmoon is an apparent human (has never been seen as a mermaid), who after being controlled and used by several people was adopted into the Foxy family. They also have DID, because human. This is the second au where the twins are younger than 20. Bloody, Scythe, Hunter, and Rabies

AAaaaand that’s a wrap! Those are all the Bloodmoons I have come up with!

I think

I hope

🎶I pray that he— uh wrong character

I may have issues

[chaifootsteps]

All this hate on Charlastor fans ALMOST makes me petty-ship it.

I say almost and I won't because I have Rosie and Alastor as LG solidarity besties. And that's because when the pilot rolled out, I thought Alastor was gay based on his words to Angel "And what can you do, my effeminate fella?", then I saw a comment saying he's gay and ran with it not looking back twice (I wasn't in the fandom all these years, I unfortunately disliked the pilot thinking Angel was a walking stereotype and the RACISM, the SEXISM, too much for me even if I loved the concept of HH.)

Tbh, did Viv ever say Alastor was gay at any point? Then perhaps changed it to aroace??? Idk, I remember this very vaguely and it's not like it wouldn't be in character for her to say shit so she escapes criticism/is able to dunk on people via "well, atchually-"

I don't think she did, but I remember the SH crew -- including Sam Miller -- was joking about it him being gay when the first images from the series dropped.

[the-lonelyshepherd]

i am curious about calliope, i feel like i know a lot about the silly cowboyes but not enough about her, what’s she like what’s her story

CALLIEEEEE!!!

the reason i dont post/draw her as much as the cowboyes (yeehaw) is because shes newer, less developed, and deals with a lot of like. directly touchy subjects for myself. also her design changes every 2 days but she does get more decrepit and more middle aged man looking every design lmfao (she is a . newly 18 year old girl.) im just going to say words now its going to be a mess brace yourself

she herself is kind of a mess her whole concept is that she was kind of Weird but like. normaled out. joined the track team. was good at it. was like. kind of in with the crowd. and then it all starts falling apart.

she was very quiet and then very "shut up and go with it" for most of her life and now shes like a confused paranoid wreck because like. she can contain the horrors no longer. shes kind of a dick sometimes kind of unaware of a lot of stuff VERY confused about her entire situation probably iron deficient and oh so very tired. its a very "i dont recognize myself in the mirror but maybe i never knew who i really was" type of story

im still working on the exact rules of the werewolfism ,,,,,,, but im leaning towards making it NOT actually from a bite. for my secret evil Reasons.

originally the plan was to have her be aroace and have a whole Thing about that but now im leaning more towards simply aro (wether that be aroallo or non SAM aro im not sure yet but leaning towards the latter).

she also does llike. experience hallucinations and delusions and paranoid spells like outside of the whole werewolf thing. theyre two seperate problems she has . very confusing and awful for her lmao

the story is more of a vibe and a few scenes than solid right now but its like. setting building (track, friendgroup, home life) -> fakeout (dog bite) -> actually initiating problem (theres several versions of this and im not sure which one im doing yet) -> she has to LEAVE and everything gets fucking crazy and there is no structure beyond this point minus random scenes and throwaway characters (roadkill, hospital, living room, van, cliff,,,,,, idk theres a lot of random scenes, probably something w/her brother )

im. very incoherent aand tired rn but i love her lots and if you wanna get a good idea of Her . then the best i have is her pinterest board

GRIINNNN tysm for asking about her im sorry if this makes no sens e😭

[negative-speedforce]

OC Fandom Asks! For Kayla and Siv please

1, 3, 7, 10, 15, 19, and 29?

1: Was your OC influenced or inspired by any particular fictional character(s) when you made them?

Kayla is loosely based on the ORIGINAL-original version of Siv, the one from 14-year-old me's DC/Marvel/Percy Jackson/Star Wars crossover. I had some really cool concepts for the later chapters of that one, and I decided to recycle them into a whole new character.

Siv is quite literally the product of a dream I had when I was 13, but overall, while I mostly base my characters' stories and personalities off their playlists, her personality has been influenced by a whole lot of characters. They were influenced by Cassandra from Tangled: The Series, Natasha Romanoff, Reva from Kenobi, Adrien from Miraculous, and a whole lot of other characters from fandoms I've been into over the 7+ years I've had them.

3: What genre would your OC do badly in but it would be hilarious or interesting to watch?

Kayla would absolutely SUCK in a rom-com. First of all, she aroace-spec, second of all, she does not know how to talk to girls- at all. It would low-key be pretty funny to watch her fumble around like that.

Siv would loathe being in a Regency period drama. All those rules and restrictions for how you have to be- she wouldn't be able to stand it. She'd probably end up going apeshit and destroying the castle.

7: If your OC had to cosplay as a fictional character, who would they choose?

Kayla normally isn't the cosplaying type, but I think she'd have a lot of fun dressed up as Sam from Totally Spies.

Siv would probably dress up as some kind of creature from Star Trek. I'm not sure what, but they'd pull it off really well nonetheless.

10: How would your OC do in the last book/movie/tv show/game/etc. you read/watched/played?

Oooh I watched Birds of Prey yesterday with my Grandma (it is her favorite movie) so this will be fun-

Kayla absolutely slays. She's got that vaguely morally gray component to her character that means that she'll probably get along with most of the main cast. Though Harley's personality would probably give her a headache.

I'm actually planning an arc where Siv has to team up with Harley and the Birds of Prey for... plot reasons! I feel like she'd get along best with Dinah and Helena for obvious reasons, but ngl I'm mostly planning this arc because I have the idea of Siv snapping at Harley and telling her to shut up/stop being annoying/etc, and Harley goes all psychiatrist on her.

15: How well would your OC do in a standard slasher movie?

Kayla, being a secret agent, would fare pretty well. Her skills in recognizing patterns and taking down supervillains would be invaluable in a slasher film.

Siv, if they weren't the slasher themself, would definitely make it to the end, and probably end up slashing the slasher.

19: If your OC was in Star Trek’s Starfleet, what would be their role/position? Or, if that doesn’t really fit your OC: why would they get kicked out of Starfleet?

Kayla, being a biomedical engineer in real life, would probably be either the chief medical officer or an engineer in Starfleet.

Siv would get thrown out of Starfleet for starting too many fights and overwhelming her ship's medical supplies with all the injuries she's caused.

29: Gun to their head, what is your OC’s fursona?

I don't even know if Kayla really knows what a fursona is, but if she had to chose, I think she'd go with some kind of bird. Like maybe a blue jay or some other kind of corvid?

Siv isn't a furry, but she made up a fursona as a joke with her friends in high school. It's a lynx that wields a giant battle axe.

[ryanyflags]

hi!! i really don’t know who to ask but it seems like you have a lot of knowledge about this stuff, is there a term for someone who’s romantic and sexual attraction are entertwined? like one type cannot exist without the other / someone isn’t able to separate the concepts? i can’t really tell if that’s aro/acespec or if it’s just demi, any help would be appreciated lol

This vaguely reminds me of ansequencerose, but the opposite. So sequencerose / sequenceromanticsexual?

The wording could be a bit confusion, because follow the original terms' wording, it would be:

only experiencing romantic attraction after sexual attraction is felt, and only experiencing sexual attraction after romantic attraction is felt.

It's a bit weird because it's circular in it's existence. But it could be read as they both have to exist to exist at all, one can't exist without the other.

Though I'm not sure that covers the covers the "isn't able to separate the concepts" part. Which reminds me of non sam (non split attraction model), and ay (non sam aroace(spec)). One meaning of non sam could be experiencing all your attraction one, so not separating them into different attractions / concepts. So maybe you could call it non sam rose (or non sam romanticsexual).

For non sam, it's a label you can add on to anything. You mentioned demi, so you could just do that. And since ay is aroaspec-spec, you could also just use ay.

I feel like there's got to be a specific label for this, but I can't think of one. That part of a-spec terms isn't really my focus. Anyone else want to add on?

[askanaroace]

So I have a question. I don't feel attracted romantically to people and I don't feel any sexual attraction. Am I ace, aroace or am I just picky with people?

*holds up mirror* You're the only one who can answer this, OP!

Identity is not something we are diagnosed with. How we navigate and describe our feelings is totally and completely self-determined.

I don't know how you want to identify. I don't know how each of these labels/concepts makes you feel. I don't know what makes you feel best/most comfortable. I don't know what communicates to others what it is you want to communicate.

And if you don't know that either, that's fine! Throw your ideas in a hat, pick one out, and try that out for a couple of months. For those couple of months, set aside all doubt and inner-fighting. Just let yourself explore how this makes you feel. At the end of the couple months or later, then re-asses how you're feeling and if you want to go ahead and try out something else.

At the end of the day, it's not our labels that matter. It's our feelings. Desires. Thoughts. Boundaries. Needs. Wants. That's what you need to pay attention to.

It's valid to be a non-SAM ace or aro.

It's valid to be aroace.

It's valid to be a late bloomer.

It's valid to be picky and have standards.

It's valid to "technically" fall under some identity term but label a different way that you prefer to label/not connect with that community you might "technically" meet.

It's valid to disregard labels altogether.

I could pick out an answer for you, but then it wouldn't be your answer to your feelings. I can't feel your feelings for you. I can only validate what you do feel. <3

[snurgle07]

What's some of your favorite rarepairs from some of your favorite fandoms?

Ooh that’s a fun one! I'm definitely a big multishipper, and it doesn't take much for me to enjoy a rarepair. Sooo I'm gonna stick to the two major fandoms that have given me brainrot and only name a few because I can ramble for sure haha. I can elaborate more if prompted tho :>

For Mob Psycho 100

QPR Ritshou: Ritshou is by no means a rare pair within the fandom (there is a lot of content!) but I have a very specific vision of them in a queer platonic bond specifically. I like viewing them as more alterous than romantic, mainly because I am attached to the aroace Ritsu headcanon and I love to project. I’d absolutely love to explore this concept in art or fic one of these days because it's very complex in my head! I’d say that brand of Ritshou content might be too self-indulgent for others to care, but I've surprisingly seen some QPR content for these two already!

Tokugawa/Kamuro, Takenaka/Inukawa, and Matsumine (looking at you theo!) also appeal to me (separate from each other ofc)! I like the opposites vibe of the last two and I wish there were more content for all of them. (Though I completely understand why these are rarepairs at the same time haha). In my head, their dynamics all involve quiet/serious guys who secretly enjoy the company of the other a lot, and I think that's cute.

For Psychonauts

Frazie/Sam: I know people tend to hop on the Frazie/Norma train, which is definitely a fun pairing, but I’ve fallen for the idea of Frazie with Sam instead. The comedy potential of Raz finding out his big sister is dating Dogen’s big sister is golden to me. I think they'd get along well! They're both weird woodsy girls who shift between nice and intimidating. I want to draw these two together eventually!

QPR Clem/Crystal: I have an aged-up Psychonauts 'AU' of sorts in my head. These two would live together, and generally be very touchy-feely in terms of affection, but not romantically be a thing. It's a very sweet concept to me! They'd be inspired by Cassie and Compton's relationship while interning at the Motherlobe, and they mostly act as feeble supports to each other's severely low self-esteem! Fun. On a similar note, I think Crystal and Phoebe would be cute romantically.

Maloof and Elka for that matter! I think Nils and Elka would be on and off for a long time, and she'd eventually fall for Maloof's cutesy mafia boss schtick. They'd have a sorta opposites dynamic that'd be cute I think!

And yea! Those are what came to mind! Thanks for the ask! :D

[noa-ciharu]

I'm grateful for having tumblr aroace community when I was 18-21 and grasping the concept of aromanticism/asexuality but as I grow older I feel more and more out of touch with tumblr's aroace circles. I guess that's the result of me growing older and cultural differences. Cuz to me a lot of debates going on there come down to theory vs practice (in my case in very queer-friendly country :>): how you perceive yourself and your relationships vs how 99% of society will perceive it and how much do you let it get to you over time. Because you can only go as far with society that won't even acept people wanting to stay single isn't some mental illness, try explaning qprs or SAM to them

[chronicalchaos]

What is the sexuality of the trio and weaver kids from wick Peculiarity au? and congratulations on lgbt pride :⁠-⁠)

Thanks! Happy pride for you as well!

Well, it's not really a sexuality, but I can see Sam being gender fluid. As for Travis and Duncan, I'm not sure, they might be straight, they might be gay for each other, who knows, I'm leaving this one open honestly.

The weaver's don't really know the concept of sexuality, but Tim could definitely be Pan. Tom probably is on the AroAce spectrum, not that he wouldn't fall in love, he just spends his days travelling around on his car with a gun and a demonic pet/friend. Lillian might discover herself as a lesbian in the future, Caleb and Benny probably are just straight.

They aren't really includee in the ask, but John's an Ally, while Mary and James would be very homophobic. That's all, i think :)

[a-flaming-triple-a]

Yes! I also feel like aroace should be a non-SAM identity. You know, when I'm coming out to people, I usually say aroace first, then explain more if they are confused. It just feels weird to use the whole words "aromantic and asexual" because not only are they long and unwieldy, they feel sterile, like a diagnosis. Gay people get to just say "I'm gay" and everyone knows what they mean without them having to identify as "homosexual." I want people to understand my identity not as some complicated duality but as a single simple concept.

Conceptualizing Aroace Identity

Something that has always frustrated me as an aroace is the way aroace identity is portrayed or conceptualized by other people. I think most of us would agree that being aroace isn’t always as simple as “I’m both aromantic and asexual.” There are an infinite number of ways to conceptualize one’s own aroace identity, and it’s going to be different for every person.

The relationship between my aromanticism and my asexuality is constantly shifting, so there’s a chance I’ll read this post tomorrow and feel differently, but personally I’m uncomfortable framing my aroace-ness as a duality. You see, being aroace is weird. Because in some ways, aromanticism and asexuality are two sides of the same coin, in the same way that panromanticism and pansexuality are. But in some ways, they’re also opposites, and because of the aspec community’s (understandable) use of the SAM, people don’t often think of being aroace as a single unit. Aroaces, due to the nature of aspec identity and community, are the only perioriented people who are expected to frame our identity in terms of the SAM. And to some extent, I understand why that is. Aromanticism and asexuality are different, and I would never try to argue that they’re the same thing. But I think for a lot of aroace people, they are the same, or at least they’re part of a single whole, rather than a conglomeration of two independent identities. For many of us, we’re not aro/ace, or aro and ace, we’re aroace. The distinction, at least to me, matters.

There are a lot of ways to think of aroace identity, and for me personally, I’m comfortable calling myself either just aro, or specifically aroace as a unit; I don’t at all vibe with identifying solely as ace, even if I do consider myself ace. I realize that’s strictly personal, and there are many aroaces who feel the exact opposite. I’m not trying to insinuate that any way of conceptualizing one’s aroace identity is better or more valid than any other; identity is personal. I do, however, think that there is a conversation we’re not having, and that’s how to carve out aroace spaces, especially as aro and ace communities rightfully become more and more distinct. Full disclosure, I spend most of my time in aro spaces (hence this blog), and I consider my aromanticism a more impactful part of my identity than my asexuality. But they’re still connected, and I think that intersection is important.

So here’s my hot take: aroace can be a non-SAM identity.

“But Techno!” you may be crying out, “How can aroace be a non-SAM identity if it inherently has both aro and ace in it?”

The short answer is that we can use language to mean whatever we want it to mean. The long answer is I just don’t think it’s fair that we should have to conceive of our romantic and sexual orientations as different when they don’t feel different, when no other perioriented people have to do that. So maybe being aroace doesn’t have to be inherently predicated on the SAM. Personally, I do find the SAM useful in some ways, but that mostly has to do with community relations and less to do with how being aroace actually feels to me. It’s a blurry distinction for a lot of us. So let’s carve out spaces where it’s allowed to be blurry. Being aroace is a uniquely positioned identity, and we should embrace that, and use the language we have in the way that makes the most sense for us, individually.

Other aroaces, please chime in with your thoughts. How do you personally conceptualize your identity?

(I would ask that if you’re not aroace, you please refrain from commenting, but reading and reblogging this would still be much appreciated!)

[negative-speedforce]

who are your OCs celebrity crushes? (real or in universe lol)

Siv: Helena Bonham Carter, Beyonce

Jay: Starfire, Chris Evans

Cassandra: Bruce Wayne, Mads Mikkelsen

Hailey: Nyane Lebajoa, Tom Hiddleston

Arya: Miley Cyrus, Hunter Schaffer

Ember: N/A (aroace)

Gina: Amy Lee, Bella Hadid

Esme: Jungkook, Liam Hemsworth

Cat: N/A (aroace)

Max: Nightwing, Gerard Way

Kyle: Dwane Johnson, Simu Liu

Eric: Lil Nas X, Hozier

Jacob: Nichelle Nichols, Toby Maguire

Khalil: N/A (aroace)

Antonio: Ariana Grande, Zendaya

Ameerah: Jeri Ryan, Pedro Pascal

Rania: Oscar Issac, P!nk

Reggie: N/A (aroace)

Meredith: Scarlet Johanson, Charli XCX

Director Hawke: Jennifer Anniston, Janet Jackson

Onnie: Batwoman, Gwendoline Christie

Pippa: Jessi Juno, Oscar Issac

Jessi: Brendan Urie, Bruce Wayne

Hyun-Ki: SZA, Emma Watson

Marie: Demi Lovato, Sirella, Daughter of Kul (Klingon Acid Metal singer)

Qiara: Kathryn Janeway, Spock

Liah: Lwaxana Troi, Taylor Swift

Soraya: N/A (aroace)

Thalia: N/A (aroace)

Laila: Trilla Sunduri, Rae Sloane

Athena: Ahsoka Tano, Grand Admiral Thrawn

Reyna: Depa Bilaba, Asajj Ventress

Samira: N/A (aroace-spec)

Aldrich: (was born before the modern concept of 'celebrities')

Sohelia: N/A (aroace)

Matt: Sam Smith, Dove Cameron

Dolores: Orlando Bloom, Dolly Parton

Vanessa: Doja Cat, Lalisa Manoban

Victorie: (was born before the modern concept of 'celebrities')

[aroandawkward]

(cw internalised arophobia)

I was such a dumb aro when I first heard the word "aromantic". I thought it seemed antisocial - I have a distinct memory of thinking "I can't be aromantic because I could definitely eat spaghetti in a candlelit restaurant with someone and accept flowers from them and go to the cinema with them! Anyone could do that, why would you decide to call yourself aromantic?"

I'd never had a crush but I decided that must be because I was asexual (which tbf I am). My initial reaction to the concept of aromanticism was to convince myself that I couldn't be aromantic because I could hypothetically go on a date (even though I'd never wanted to with any specific person).

I was so aro I didn't even understand what it meant to be aro.