#Aren't I the author
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francisnyx · 4 days ago
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What am I suppose to call Merlin. He's hard to describe. What is he, I created him and I don't even know (irony with his lore lmao). He was a person raised to fulfill a role from birth (which I might add that he's suppose to be more of a vessel, like a medium to channel other on to like the previous ones before him but fellas is it clone or simply homuculus if you're create from an essence of the progenitor but is still an individual with some differences or is that more like descendants but also they kinda are all the same person but not. It's Complicated), doesn't know much common sense and is inhuman but grew a heart after the journey but Then Things happen and now he has no body. Became a incorporeal entity. Met the progenitor and awaken the memoeies and discover the reason of his existence and all previous versions and the machinations of things. And he later fused with the awakened will of a star (which is much older than he is but is also not with the complication of maturity of a star conciousness, also the will was an AI built by humanity that has descends to became one with the core and born anew)
Is he the progenitor? Is he the guide they hope for? Is he the guardian of a star? Is he human? WHAT IS HE
Ah i forgot to mention the thousands soul of people he knew and cherished he carries around in his chest. Humanity conciousness is a part of him by the way. With the whole sea of human souls thing in Avalon (the star above, should be called moon really)'s garden
#madman ramblings on things that don't make sense#confusion3000#Aren't I the author#why is this so convoluted#if somebody ask what is he he would just laugh#and say smth like why don't you find out#like the little shit he is#oc#Merlin#hsr oc#oh yeah did I mention that he's from hsr universe#can you tell how much Ayin and X with a dash of angela bounces around in here#it doesn't really matter what he is anynore#what matters is there is no going back to how things used to be#'he' of now aren't the same as he was back then (literally)#something about the ship of theseus. dream of a butterfly. the burden of legacy and building the wing to freedom#did he finally found answer of his question at the start of all this?#who knows#i need to rant to somebody abou this bastard#ah but you see. if you look at it very simply you could argue that No. the progenitor is Merlin the real one the only merlin#and the others are just copies#but is that really it#'Merlin' is the name they gift this wretched roles on#if someone raise to believed they are Merlin all their life even would you disagree that they aren't merlin?#and i don't just mean role in theatrical sense too#because 'Merlin' is an actual position here lmao#with authority and everything including salaries lmao#hilariously more like pocket money tho#as a 'Merlin' is always a Merlin. they don't stop being Merlin even after dead#you see. it's a thing assign from birth (you could also say it's even before that with the prophecy predictions)
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inkskinned · 1 year ago
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what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?
i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?
a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?
in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.
girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.
there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.
for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.
something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.
is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.
most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."
a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.
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chittychittyyangyang · 2 years ago
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Listen, you should never film strangers in public without their consent, but I swear there need to be fines or something for people who do that shit in some spaces. For example: I had to go to the ER last night, and some jerk filmed a woman who just came in and was clearly having an asthma attack. She immediately got to go back, and he was unhappy about that. Believe me, I get that it sucks having to wait when you're in pain, but you don't get to pick who deserves care when. The medical system in the US is a nightmare, and the ER could be the worst moment of someone's life. No one deserves to be recorded because some jack ass believes someone doesn't look like they need care.
This is fine to reblog. People who film strangers should be shamed if nothing else.
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bethanydelleman · 2 months ago
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I was talking about a historical male author I dislike because I found his works misogynistic and the person said, "Oh, well I suppose you don't read Shakespeare either." and I was like, "Shakespeare? SHAKESPEARE?!?! Of course I read Shakespeare, that man loved women."
Shakespeare wrote a wide variety of fleshed out female characters. He wrote Damsels in Distress, Cross-dressing Girlbosses, and Complex Female Villains. He wrote a woman who refused to sell her virtue to save her family and then shamed her brother for suggesting it. He wrote Taming of the Shrew and it's opposite, All's Well that Ends Well, in which the wife hunts down and tames the husband. He wrote men who are good because they listen to, trust, and defend women. He wrote women of all kinds. He wrote women who drive the plot and women doomed by the narrative. He wrote women in love and women who pathetically follow a man who doesn't like them and women in hatred. He wrote sensible women and silly women and everything in between of all ages.
I wish modern authors could write women as well as he did.
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lucidmagic · 1 year ago
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Repeat after me:
The first draft just needs to exist
The second draft needs to be functional
The third draft needs to be effective
The first draft just needs to exist
The second draft needs to be functional
The third draft needs to be effective
The first draft just needs to exist
The second draft needs to be functional
The third draft needs to be effective
Remember, the second and third can't happen if you don't have something to work with. Your first draft will always be shit compared to your third, but at least it exists. The worst first draft is an unfinished one. The best first draft is a just completed one.
You read books/stories not in their first draft form-- only in their finished form (third, fourth, sometimes fifteenth draft). So stop comparing your first draft with a final one.
So, just write--you can make it better later. Perfectionism is the greatest weight a creator can carry.
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blooms-in-april · 3 months ago
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I want the fic where since Bruce and Clark are public figures (Clark to a lesser extent, but he's decently known, he's done video interviews and stuff) there's a subsection of the Internet that ships them as their public personas. The ship is called Blark and it's a small but strong RPF ship, even a couple of league members (mostly Wally, TBH) ship it.
And suddenly Blark blows up (maybe Clark defends Brucie from a drunk at a gala?) and now it's everywhere. And both Bruce and Clark brush it off, but when they start going through the fan edits and video compilations and essays by strangers online about why they're in love- they realize they actually are.
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rottmnt-residuum · 1 year ago
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promised raph angst. so much under the surface
this takes place right before leo and mikey get back from checking hidden city entrances
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uncanny-tranny · 1 month ago
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"If men got periods/needed abortion/got ovarian or breast cancer, those resources would be handed out like candy! They'd be more plentiful than ATMs!!"
You mean perisex cis men. You mean perisex cis men. Say what you mean.
I'm a trans man. I avoid all medical care because ninety percent of my doctors have not treated me properly because I am a trans man. I am acutely aware that doctors would be more than happy to not provide me care on the basis of my being trans, even if it costed my life.
Every time I so much as think about the doctors, I'm reminded of men like Robert Eads - of how my care is at the whim of the opinions a doctor has about my life. And because of my own past negative experiences, I hesitate to open my patient portal to schedule an appointment. When I have gotten a good doctor, it's not been the rule, it's the exception. I have a doctor right now who I'm lucky to see, who actually treats me like a human being. I'm celebrating that a doctor finally treats me like a person.
If you want to group all men as being the same, I hope you're willing to have that blood on your hands. Because that care is routinely kept away from men, and it's a real, tangible, systemic issue.
I don't talk about this because I see being trans as this negative thing, but because I want to continue living and I want my trans siblings to live. I understand the frustration that people have who say this - it's another systemic issue that also costs lives. However, I am alarmed at the trend of... forgetting or perhaps erasing that this is still an issue for men, that we literally aren't treated the same as somebody like a cis perisex woman. No doctor has ever treated me like one, and of that I know for a fact. And this is a simple fix - be clear about who you mean when you talk about a group of people or a specific phenomenon. That applies when you are talking about any group of people because, generally, these overgeneralizations will be useless because it can't apply to everyone, and might just hurt a group of people you may not even be intending on hurting.
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drenched-in-sunlight · 2 months ago
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saying this as respectfully as possible but. Do not put fandom content creators on a pedestal. We are also just fans contributing to a community just as you are. We have boundary on our own work and that’s it. What I say is not and should not be considered sth the whole fandom should listen to. I’m just a normal ass person ranting about things on my blog. If it does not have a fandom tag for others to engage in, do not make it out to be me trying to start fights or addressing the whole community. Because it’s not.
I’ve said it before and I will say it again, my art, my lore talk, is biased. I’ve never tried to hide that I view Marika a certain way and will always develop my theory following that base assumption.
Aside from translation stuffs and pointing out in-game items, everything else I say you can look at it, agree or disagree, and move on to form your own opinions. Just because I draw stuffs doesn’t mean you get to saddle me with responsibilities about managing fandom expectations. What the hell? I’m a fan artist, I’m the last person who you should look at for “leaderism” (?) WHAT?
I can and will be a hater in my own space, like I know sometimes other artists will just post their stuffs and not engage too heavily with fandom, and for a while I did try to do that here (because I’m already a dramatic ass on twitter), that’s just not me though.
You will get art and you will get my opinions as well.
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#asking ppl to [celebrate different takes] is... WHAT?#different takes as in well I think she likes apples and you think she likes grapes. yeah that’s some fun discussion to be have#but different takes as in the fundamental of a character’s drive and personality??? NO#let’s put that down very clear here#I can still read fics where Marika is cold and calculate and manipulative as long as I can see there’re layers to it and the author#set it up in a way that I can see they got her backstory and build those layers based on that#and then there are ppl who literally only portray her as omg evil girlboss 101 let’s blame everything on this cardboard character#then I click back.#and there r ppl who might not vibe with how i portray her and they can ignore me. THAT'S OK TOO. we r in our own space.#it’s as simple as that!#ever since the dlc is out i literally could see the amount of ppl blocking me go up and im just “ok” because i do go around muting ppl too.#that's normal fandom space managing experience. pls do that#lore discussion is for ppl to engage in so u say ur piece i say mine and we can continue or not depending on situation#but FANWORK? leave each other alone or be a hater in ur own space ok?#personal#also where are these ppl who have been defending Marika at... because if u exclude me#and some others i can count on one hand. where are these ppl?#ppl saying headass stuffs about the HS aren't even Marika fans or engage too much in fandom to begin with#meanwhile u can't even find one youtube lore essay that says anything good about her#ppl are even trying to give Messmer's mother position to GEQ for no goddamn reason#like where is this overwhelming support for Marika at cuz as the active Marika stan around im not seeing it
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aimasup · 3 months ago
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Material this is referencing is for 18+ audiences. Children get OUT 🧹🧹🧹🧹 GET. SCROLL. 🧹🧹🧹
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whenthelightisrunninglow · 6 months ago
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remembered @hehe-hoho-ohno's misfits au it's sooooo good and i love it. CHEERS AND APPLAUSE. YAY
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dragonpropaganda · 1 year ago
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you should talk about your thoughts on rw fanon (looking with huge eyes)
Oh god, there's a lot of major misconceptions have concreted into fanon, mostly around ancient society and ascension.
First things first! Ascension is not death! They are entirely separate things treated entirely separately by the text of the game. I can see where the interpretation is coming from, but it doesn't really align with how the text treats either subject. Five Pebbles may want to remove the self destruction taboo, but from his reaction to the rot it's clear that he doesn't want to die. Conflation of ascension and death only comes up as an offhand possibility that pebbs makes on iterator 4chan, when he's going into the possibilities of scenarios that even the other sliverists are doubtful of! (let me make clear that I am not a sliverist by any means)
Ascension is more of talked about as a form of transcendence, yeah? A Bell, Eighteen Amber Beads talks about their sitution as being "To have grasped at the boundless infinites of the cosmic void…", not as them seeking an end to life.
The beta dialogue goes into more detail, mentioning the "infinities of time and space" and the "boundless fractal planes of spirit and reality...", though this dialogue was cut and it's hard to tell how much it reflects the concept as in the released game.
As for the cultural misconceptions... there's A Lot to talk about, but the first that comes to mind is the common conflation of the five natural urges and the christian concept of sin.
It is true that the negation of urges is mentioned by moon as an alternative method of ascension, but much of what we know about the culture of the people who the fandom calls the ancients (which makes discussion of the depths a mess but that's something for another post entirely) points towards the urges not being seen as shameful.
Even the first urge does not seem to be particularly scorned! Being a warrior is presented as a cause for bragging in the Shaded Citadel pearl, being comparable with being an artist and a fashion legend. The second urge, also does not seem to be suppressed. Multiple sources attribute some level of honour to parenthood! The aforementioned pearl also mentions Seventeen Axes, Fifteen Spoked Wheel as being a "Mother, Father and Spouse" without any hint of shamefulness. Nineteen Spades, Endless Reflections expresses pride about having progeny, mentioning it alongside their owned land and esteem among their peers.
After some peer review, an esteemed friend has told me to add a section on purposed organisms as well! This is not so much my area, so I might be a bit off on some things.
As moon says, the majority of purposed organisms were tubes in boxes, and that the primal fauna of the world are almost entirely extinct. A lot of the fandom seems to ignore the first part, and i can't say I blame them, but the evolution of the creatures is so much weirder than people think.
Concept art for the creatures has this interesting quality to it, where the organic parts of the creatures have an almost... melty quality to them.
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In the concept art, the flesh appears as if it's almost defying the machinery to form an animal shape. It's as if it's conquering its own artificiality the way the foliage grows over the (stone, brick and concrete, not mostly metal as some think!) ruins.
Of course, it's hard to really tell how much of this reflects the finalised concept, most of the integration is much smoother in the game, in line with a seamless kind of biomechanical design. There was always an intention of biomechanical strangeness, as shown in this screenshot of the devlog before the term "slugcat" even existed!
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That said, the melty nature of the concept art shows a level of wild change inherent the biomechanical nature of the creatures, as if they truly are the result of these "tubes in boxes" almost revolting against their own boxes.
and considering centipedes... some tubes may not have had boxes in the first place!
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bluishfrog · 5 months ago
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Inspired by "complete" by norethor
Fic Art Friday - event tag - event description
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abearinthewoods · 10 days ago
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Randomly thinking about how jk Rowling coded it in to the HP universe that the stairs to the girls dorms had a spell to keep boys out but not the inverse. Even having a character explain to Ron that its because the founders viewed boys as less trustworthy.
In retrospect given that it really shouldn't have been a surprise when she harpooned on about "men in dresses trying to invade women's spaces". She clearly sees sexual deviancy as a distinctly male trait.
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add1ctedt0you · 10 months ago
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Canonically speaking, jc' reaction to someone he doesn't like/has strong negative feelings towards, because that person was a jerk to his sister, is to regulate his emotions according to how his sister feels. In a jyl lives au, after wwx's return, canon jc is going to his sister, saying something like: 'while I think we should throw at least a cup of tea at him because he left us you and a-ling like that, it's your choice, jin zixuan was your husband. What are we feeling now, jiejie?'
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starlightvld · 6 months ago
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do you any call of duty fics to recommend? I'm relatively new to the fandom and am looking for some good reads (preferably soapghost) 👀
*Rubs hands together*
Oh-ho-ho! Do I have recs (aside from, humbly, my own fics)? You bet your ass I do.
Bear with me because this is going to be a long one (also, be aware that I'm ace and vanilla as shit so if you want kinky or PwithoutP recs, you'll need to ask others. My recs are all slow burn or PwithP and only happy endings):
ghost/soap fics (complete):
One shots:
to love what is mortal - homo_hexual
Moonlit Sands - KitschyKestrel
who dares loves - Zairielon (technically a one-shot, but 40k words sooo)
hell hath no fury - sunshowers_and_dandelion_wine (and this one's a 50k one shot 😅)
15-60k multi-chaps:
Seasons - StinglessWasp
Affirmative, Sir - Wixiany
Keep The Change - hertzdonut
ripe and ruin - ghcst
Half-Silvered Surface - ivyscribblez
Heart in Ironworks - Voidfavors
60-100k multi-chaps or series:
Yes to Heaven - Apollos_Last_Prophet
The Heartbeat Series - Grangers_apprentice (series)
yours to keep (anonymous series, '09 soapghost)
Not Alive, Nor Dead - reds_skull
100K+ multi-chaps or series:
all that's said in the low light - headlocket
Any Time You Need Me - thirteenbullets (series and the fics that brought me into the COD fandom)
Howling - Cattraine
ghost/soap fics (WIPs):
Hold This, Please? For Me? - CitrusEatingCat, Howlsslime (Oodelilies), KellsBells12 (HILARIOUS so far and beautiful art as well)
Finding Light in the Darkness - Lady_Ares (lovely "what if" AU of canon events)
(Stay) Turn your radio on - Kat2107 (AMAZING Soap makes a deal with Death fic)
Trust Me - Kaerrion
You've Got My Body, Flesh, and Bone - GrannyBoo
Other COD Fics
this year i am becoming my own home - multifandommonster (Gaz & Ghost friendship)
Secrets Secrets Are No Fun (secrets are for everyone) - Plz2daysatan (technically soapghost, but it's all background, mostly about Soap and his family)
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In case it's not obvious, this is by NO MEANS a comprehensive list. In fact, I'm absolutely certain I've missed some very good fics that simply contain tags I've excluded from my searches because they aren't my thing. But hopefully there's enough here to get you started.
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