#Anyway i think i may have taken your post and gone a bit off the rails with it

[classysushi]

the history of the term dead name is from how no matter what your friends and chosen family call you in life, the family responsible for your funeral was likely to ignore this and put your “deadname” on your gravestone. So even if your friends and loved ones have called you Steven for years, your family might put “Sarah” on the tombstone.

i don't get the whole deadname thing. like i do empirically but it never applied to me. personally my birth name's like. idk, yugoslavia? it's not accurate to call me that now and if you do you're a bit dense, but sometimes you need to speak about history with the names it had at the time, and that's all good.

[diyasgarden]

Art x hairdresser!reader where their first encounter ends up with her messing up the haircut, wanting to cry every time she sees his face on the TV cause, yeah, SHE gave him that atrocious haircut :( but he comes back two months later anyway, asking to have his hair cut specifically by HER!!!

OH OH OHHHHH. Referencing this post

When he came in you were so in awe of his hair. Beautiful blonde curls which seem like they belong in some fairy tale not in real life. It wasn't that you hadn't seen curls like that before, but it was rare to see it on someone of his age and in that shade.

When he sits down in the seat, he smiles at you from the mirror, and he really does look like prince charming come to life. Then he tells you he wants something short, naturally you're confused. Such beautiful curls and he wants them gone? Regardless, it's not like you can tell him no. He's the customer. He asked for a haircut, and you're going to give him that. But it doesn't mean you're not allowed to ask questions.

"Are you sure you want it short?" You ask as you take the scissors and begin to snip.

"Mhm" He seemed like a man of few words.

"You're sure?" You probe once more.

He lets out a little strained laugh and asks, "Is there a reason why you keep asking?" He doesn't sound mean, but simply confused. You assume you probably weirded him out.

"Oh it's just..." How do you phrase this without sounding like a complete and utter weirdo? "Your curls are very pretty"

He smiles at this with a little nod. "I need it a little shorter for tennis." Oh well you weren't expecting that. You both start talking about that now. How his tennis career is taken off and that he wants a bit shorter for when he plays. You even ask couple questions about the color (completely natural he swears, you believe him).

If you weren't so immersed in the conversation, you may have realized that you cut off way too much. Once you put the scissors down and step back you see it's much shorter. It's not bad but...it's certainly a look.

You assume he is going to hate it, "I'm so..." Your voice trails off before you can even finish the statement.

Art just stands up assuming you're done and looks in the mirror with a little nod. "Cool, thanks." He pops some money in the tip jar and walks away.

You realize he wasn't lying about being an upcoming tennis player because you start to see him on the television. Every time you feel that haircut you imagine all the curls you completely destroyed. A weird pit in your stomach anytime you think about how you should have paid more attention to his hair during the haircut. You see that it is growing, which is relieving (although not surprising, considering the fact that he has wonderful hair). You even end up keeping track of him online, just to make sure his hair is growing back fine you tell yourself. It makes you feel less terrible about the hair cut.

Finally, nearly two months later, you see the little curls of his hair rest on his forehead as you watch a video of him playing. It is like a weight has been lifted off your chest.

It's a short lived sense of relief. You feel it all come crashing down back on you, when he walks into the salon couple days later asking for the same hair cut.

[cheesecakethots]

Date Night

Chrollo Lucilfer x Reader

after being left alone by your date in a ballroom you weren’t even invited to, you make conversation with a strange man that has bindings over his forehead.

tw: murder, sexual tension, you make out with him which is a little bit cringe, romance is a little rushed but too bad, yan!chrollo, i wrote this a year ago and never posted it so excuse the shoddy writing

this is a soulmate au except chrollo is only one who can sense that you’re his soulmate so it isn’t really mentioned, maybe i’ll make his pov at some point.

“You appear to be as bored as I am.”

The lit cigarette in your hand almost topples into the darkness when you jump at hearing a voice behind you. You don’t turn, instead leaning back into your relaxed position against the balcony railing, facing out into the night sky.

You shrug, “Bored enough that I was considering throwing myself over.”

The stranger chuckles, and you swear the sound of it sends something straight to your belly.

“If you’re so bored, why not go home?”

Finally, you turn to look at him. You’re certain that if you were in a cartoon you’d have heart eyes at seeing the strangely handsome man with an odd bandage on his head.

“I mean, you can probably tell,” you say, gesturing towards your outfit, one that you put on tonight in preparation for a nightclub and not a ballroom, “that I’m someone’s plus one rather than an actual guest. That someone has gone off with another woman, leaving me here with a dead phone and no idea where I am. I have more pride than to go inside and ask those judgemental assholes to call me a taxi.” You look him up and down from the corner of your eye, taking note of his no doubt expensive suit. “No offence.”

“None taken. Does that mean that someone is looking for you?”

You sigh, frowning a little. “Probably not. My friends had basically left me alone at the club anyway. I don’t really enjoy going out to bars all that much, so when some guy in a nice suit offered me to be his date to some fancy ballroom party, I couldn’t pass it up. Now I wish I had just gotten a taxi home then and there.”

The man nods, seemingly in a bit of thought, before coming closer and planting himself next to you, also leaning against the railing. You can’t help but side eye how tight the suit is around the muscle of his arms.

“Your date and friends don’t sound like the best of company.”

“You’re not wrong.”

“May I ask for your name?”

You give him it, “And yours?”

He pauses for a moment, but not long enough for you to think too much on it.

“Chrollo… and, if you don’t mind, I have a proposal. It might help with your boredom.”

You nod, tilting your head a little in curiosity.

“Well, I came outside here to see if anyone wasn’t present in the ballroom. I have a plan set up so that I can thieve the antiques and artworks present in this building, as well as the jewellery being worn by the guests.” He hums, tilting his head a little at you. “You’re rather interesting. I wouldn’t be opposed to sharing some of the loot with you, provided you give some assistance.”

You stare at him with a blank expression for a little while. Then, your lip twitches and a loud laugh escapes you.

“Alright,” you breathe out, wiping away a stray tear, “deal. Make sure to leave that fancy pearl necklace the lady with the red hair has. I’m sure it’d suit me better.”

The man smiles, and for but a moment you take note of something other than amusement in the look, but it quickly goes.

“It’s a deal, then. When would you like to begin?”

“Hmm,” you hum, bottom lip jutting out and finger pressing to your chin jokingly. “Probably soon, it’ll be starting to get light in a few hours. Rich people melt in direct sunlight, y’know. Don’t want them taking the loot with them.”

Chrollo laughs, and it’s a gentle sound that has your heart beating faster.

“It’s a shame, though,” you murmur. “As a kid I always wanted to go to a big fancy ballroom in a big fancy dress and dance around with someone until my feet hurt. I doubt I’ll ever get the chance to be invited to one of these again.”

You sigh, eyes drifting from him back out to the scenery beyond the balcony. His own never stray from your face, a fact you don’t take notice of.

“I disagree.”

You raise an eyebrow, but say nothing more, and it prompts him to continue.

“You’re more interesting than all those inside put together. If I had been the one who had brought you here, I wouldn’t have left your side, and I would most definitely want to bring you with me again. Besides,” he says, voice shifting to a more teasing tone, “I’m sure once our little job is over, you would have enough money to come to these as you please.”

You giggle, blushing a little at the sweetness in his previous words, “Oh, with all the money I make after this job I’ll have my own ballroom to dance in. I’ll let you come visit it, if you’d like.”

The man grins, and god you almost swoon. “Oh? You’re sure you’d allow a man like me into your home, sweetheart?”

You’re considering letting him into your bed at this point.

“Hm, why would I not? I thought you were my partner in crime in all of this?”

“Well, I suppose you’re right in that,” he stands up straight, and a hand extends towards you. “How does a dance sound then, partner?”

“Sorry, partner. I’m not going back in there, at least not for a while.”

“I didn’t say anything about going back inside the ballroom.”

“Huh? Ou-Out here?”

“Why not?”

“As cliché as it sounds, I don’t really know how to dance all that well,” you admit rather awkwardly, and he laughs once more. You’re beginning to become addicted to the sound.

“You don’t have to worry, it’s only me out here. I can teach you the basics. I promise, it’s not hard, partner.”

You don’t say that you’d rather not embarrass yourself in front of the most attractive man you’ve ever met, instead hesitantly placing your hand in his own.

His skin is colder than you expect it to be, and when his other hand envelopes around you, gently holding onto your waist, you almost jolt. He leans in close to you, and the faint minty scent of his breath has your head feeling light.

“No need to be so rigid,” he murmurs quietly, “Just do as I do. I won’t laugh at you.”

How did you end up in this situation again?

He takes a slow step back, pulling you with him, and your foot accidentally treads on his own.

“Sorry!”

“It’s alright,” the man whispers, continuing to hold you as though you were made of the finest material.

A few moments pass of what you consider his graceful movements and your awkward shuffling.

“You are a natural at this, sweetheart.”

“No need to lie to me. Maybe next time we’ll bump into each other at the club and I’ll teach you how to move on the dance floor. Or, I would if I knew how. Maybe we can learn together… then again,” you eye him up and down, “you don’t seem the ‘club’ type, Chrollo.”

“I could say the same about you.”

“Is it that obvious?”

Were you two always this close to each other? One wrong move and you might end up brushing lips. You’re not opposed to the idea.

“Oh, maybe not to others, but I’m good at reading people.” He pauses for a moment. “I would describe you as a book I just can’t seem to put down.”

“You can lay me down instead, if you’d like.”

He halts rather suddenly, and you register the words that just tumbled from your mouth with a gasp.

“S-Sorry! Shit, shit, sorry, I didn’t mean to say that-“

Chrollo’s hands are tightening around your flesh within a fraction of a second, and suddenly his lips are moulded against your own, your body being pushed back until it’s pressed against the brick wall behind you.

If you were more coherent, you would be wondering what happened to the sweet gentleman you had been conversing with only a few moments prior. Maybe you would wonder if he had been replaced by some wild animal, evident by the desperation in his kisses.

But you don’t care about all that, all you can think about is how hot the air has suddenly turned, how there’s a familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach forming, and how good this feels.

Chrollo pulls back from you for a moment, and through half-lidded eyes you’re able to catch sight of your smudged lipstick around his face. You can’t help but giggle at that, prompting a slight smile from him. It doesn’t last very long, as soon he’s moving lower, face pressing into the crevice of your neck and hands combing over your waist.

“I can’t believe I’d meet you here,” You swear you hear him mumble, but you don’t really have time to think on it, not when his body presses even further against you, and his hands ghost over the backs of your thighs.

“Jump.”

“Hu-Huh?”

He doesn’t give you much time to think about it, as you’re swept of your feet, thighs encircled around his waist and allowing him to move impossibly closer.

Something hard presses to the spot between your legs, and he quickly drinks up the gasp of his name you give in response.

“Oh my!”

It takes you a few moments in your lustful haze to realise that it was not your own voice you heard. Chrollo doesn’t even glance to the side at the no doubt horrified guest who had stumbled upon the two of you, instead sighing tiredly into the skin of your throat.

The poor intruder doesn’t stick around long, retreating back into the ballroom to no doubt call someone to kick the two of you out. Chrollo slowly places your legs back on the floor so that you can stand, and you’re tempted to tear off your own skin you’re so embarrassed.

“… God.” An awkward laugh bubbles out of you, and soon you’re wheezing uncontrollably, doubling over and your head pressing to Chrollo’s chest.

“A shame,” he murmurs. “I was enjoying myself… and by the sounds you were making, so were you.”

You fear this moment will plague you forever and ever.

“Maybe I should throw myself off of the balcony, after all.”

“I wouldn’t allow you to. How am I supposed to get the job done without my partner in crime?”

You laugh, a hand moving to your face so you can cover the blush that’s only growing worse by the second. “… I like you, Chrollo. I know this is a little, um… forward and, well, fast… but I want to keep speaking to you past this night. I-If that’s not what you’re after, that’s alright too…”

You’re not sure you can bring yourself to meet his gaze, especially not after the lengthy pause that follows.

“I would like to speak to you past this night as well... and… I like you, too.”

Maybe this night wasn’t a total disaster, after all. Maybe this is the beginning of something new for you.

“Alright, well… I’m going to go inside, and get a drink before we’re kicked out, if you’d like to join me. Looks like our master plan has yet to come into fruition.”

His hand meets your hip again, “I wouldn’t be so sure on that, partner… Shall we?”

“Wait, let me…” you raise a hand and softly wipe at the lipstick staining his lips and jaw.

“Don’t make me kiss you again.”

“Nope. No more PDA. I’ve learnt my lesson.”

He opens the door for you, and you breathe in a big breath of air. This is going to suck, but at least this weirdly charming man is with you.

As the two of you step inside, your eyes immediately find the food and drinks table, missing the sight of two strange men, one short and one large, on the stage.

“Ah, it seems Feitan and Franklin are ready.”

“Hm?”

You’re not sure what comes first, the ear piercing scream on the other side of the ballroom or the sudden darkness that blankets the area.

Another scream, and you jolt backwards, reminding yourself of Chrollo, who is still holding onto you, his grip only tightening and his front pressing to your back.

“Stay close to me. This’ll be over soon.”

“Wh-What?! Chrollo, I don’t-“

You yelp when something falls down beside you, the thud managing to be heard over the chorus of screams.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Someone cries out near you, “Call the-“

Something wet sprays across your neck and face, and another thud follows.

Is this real? Are you dreaming?

A flurry of gunshots are accompanied by brief flashes of light that illuminate the people fighting to get to the doors in front of you, treading and falling over each other in a scramble to escape.

Red. Red. Red. Every flash has you shaking at the sight of more and more blood, and less and less movement. The silence you soon hear is more deafening than anything else before it.

Someone groans, and a popping sound ensues. It is silent once more.

Maybe this is some prank, some elaborate joke set up by a morally bankrupt TV show, you just happen to be the poor sucker who-

Something cold wraps around your neck, and you taste vomit in the base of your throat.

“You were right. It does suit you better.”

[misshoneyimhome]

If you don’t feel comfortable writing this then that’s fine but I had this idea: being married to William and after you have your first baby (for context maybe like a year and a half into being married) you’ve struggled a bit emotionally in general but also with confidence bc of how different you feel like you look. William has been the most supportive and has not let you dwell on the physical changes bc he still thinks you’re beautiful. You’re about 6 months post partum and William decides to take you on a little getaway with the baby taken care of by your parents. While on vacation you’re both able to reconnect and William just really wants to make you feel good and it’s just a lot of soft and slow sex. Like it somehow feels better than how you remember.

Oh bb, you can hit me with all the dad!Willy requests you want - I'm not entirely sure what I'm not comfortable writing about in this context 😉

I know body changes can be a sensitive subject, but I believe it's also important to discuss - pregnancies are wonderful, but they can also bring a lot of challenges 🤰🏼

Anyway, I hope this aligns with what you had in mind and you enjoy it🤍 「Dad!Willy x reader」

Warnings: post-pregnancy sadness, reference to sexual activity, mild smut, soft unprotected sex (p in v);

"Tu stasera, vedi, sei perfetta per me" = Darling, tonight you're perfect for me

[Inspired by 'Perfect Symphony' by Ed Sheeran, ft. Andrea Bocelli]

Word count; 3.3K

・✶ ｡ﾟ

"Tu stasera, vedi, sei perfetta per me" I William Nylander [Dad!Willy]

Everything felt different now. Everything was different now.

Not necessarily in a negative way, but it just wasn't the same anymore. Although you were aware this was how it was going to be, you still felt somewhat taken aback by it all. Since the off-season last year, you'd been mentally preparing for this, preparing for the new lifestyle you and William would face together, and the new chapter you'd begin. Yet, nobody can ever be entirely prepared for when reality sets in.

The weather was lovely. Spring had arrived, and the hockey season had left its mark with the intensity to prepare for the playoffs. And as the sunshine filtered through the curtains of your bedroom, you couldn't help but admire the little bundle of joy in your arms.

It had only been two weeks since Eliot had entered the world, and you were more than overjoyed by your new role as a mother. Additionally, you couldn't help but be emotionally moved by the fatherly role William had embraced.

You knew it had been challenging for him during your pregnancy, not fully experiencing the fatherly kicks. But his teammates had been nothing but supportive, and the fathers of the team had gone out of their way to help him ease the nerves and not worry too much.

And truly, there was no need for concerns. Though he may not have felt the fatherly kick during the pregnancy, as soon as Eliot saw the light of day, William showed nothing but love and affection for his first-born son.

It had been incredibly emotional for all of you when he first held him in his arms, and William had sat bare-chested with him on the stool, a tear streaming down his cheek in sheer joy.

It had been so beautiful.

However, as soon as you returned from the hospital and slowly began to settle in with the newly added member to the family, a sudden unexpected feeling of sadness rushed over you. Something you hadn’t thought much about during the so-called wonders of pregnancy: the changes to a woman’s body.

Of course, you knew what you'd endured for nine months: weight gain, swelling, increased water levels, nausea, headaches, stretch marks, back pain, knee pain, all sorts of discomfort. But every time you talked to other women about pregnancy, they all kept mentioning how great you looked, how well you were doing, and what a glow you carried with you. Everyone always talked about the wonders and miracles of creating a new life, yet nobody liked to discuss all the awful aspects of it. All the downsides and terrible emotional days that came along with it. And most of all, nobody talked much about how your body was going to change after giving birth.

It was as if no one would ever speak negatively about having a baby. It was always portrayed as roses and glitter, yet you knew the truth. Sure, you loved your pregnancy and how smoothly it went—especially considering how many people struggled with conceiving—but to be honest, Eliot was a result of two young adults driven by desire, finally having the chance to indulge in uninterrupted sex during the off-season from hockey. And although you knew there was no contraception involved, which you had both agreed to, neither of you could have imagined that after four drinks and two shots of tequila in Southern France, William could still manage to ejaculate twice in one night.

Despite the romantic circumstances of a vacation in Saint Tropez, the reality of being in the hotel room next to Stephanie was less so.

Yet here you were, cradling your precious son in your arms as you attempted to rest your still tired body. While William was at training, you were simply trying to make yourself as comfortable as possible at home. Then, as Eliot finally drifted off to sleep, you carefully attempted to lay him down in his crib, ensuring he was settled before quietly moving about with the baby monitor in your hand.

However, as soon as you stepped into the bathroom, your eyes fell upon your reflection.

You didn't know how long you stood there. All you knew was that you couldn't help but stare at your figure. The body that had once exuded sexiness, providing you with the confidence that had attracted William when you first met. The body that you had worked on and trained for years, and of which you were proud. It had been with you through all your dietary changes, indulging in too much junk food, enjoying delicious dinners with wine and cocktails, and most importantly, it had carried your baby.

You knew you were strong, as every pregnancy book stated. A woman's body was resilient. But what they didn't mention was how depressed you could feel when you didn't feel as attractive as before your pregnancy. You didn't even recognise yourself anymore. And you weren't sure how to cope with it.

Just the idea of William touching your new body was almost repulsive.

So, as you had done many times before, you would simply shake your head and go to great lengths to avoid looking in mirrors.

However, William did not share your feelings. In fact, quite the opposite.

Perhaps it had been because of all the chats his mother Camilla had forced him through, making sure he understood the importance of being there as a partner during this time. You were sure she’d even given his way too detail sexual education just to make sure he knew what you were putting yourself through for him and this family. 

But regardless of her input, William still thought you were beyond beautiful. If now not more than ever. You had been stronger than he ever could be, grown a life he could now call his son, and brought him to the world while he was half panicking by your side. 

To him, you were amazing. 

Yet he sensed your sadness every day that followed the birth of Eliot. And despite his bests effort in trying to remind you just how wonderful and amazing you were, his words seemed to fail. 

Even the other mothers on the team, Amanda, and Sana in particular, who’d been by your side through it all when the boys had been on the road, were trying to comfort you. They knew exactly what you were going through. But nothing worked. 

Despite your smiles and giggles out in public, a boiling uncertainty and vulnerability lingered under the surface. And it was made clear to William how bad the situation was, when he tried to touch you, and you were quick to throw him off. 

In the beginning he just though it was because you were embarrassed by the changes it had caused for your core. But then, when he even tried to gentle and simply caress your body in the shower, you couldn’t even stay there and be naked with him. 

And it frightened him. Not only were you no longer you bubbly self, happy and cheerful at all times, but you were also in this state of depression because of something he’d done, the choices you’d made together. The decision of having a child. 

It was painful. Witnessing you in distress for weeks and months, unable to do anything about it, crushed him.

It wasn't until the off-season when you spent the summer in Sweden with William's family that Camilla suddenly pulled him aside.

"Willy, my dear," she began. "Have you talked to y/n about how she feels?" she inquired one evening, while you were playing with Michelle and Eliot.

The question hung in the air, heavy with unspoken worry, as William's gaze shifted to meet his mother's. And in that moment, the floodgates of his own apprehension opened, releasing a torrent of fears and doubts that had long been simmering beneath the surface.

"I've tried," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I know that... she hasn't been herself lately. But I just don't know how to help her."

Camilla's hand tightened around his, a silent reassurance amidst the storm of uncertainty. "Sometimes, my dear boy, the greatest gift we can give to those we love is simply our presence," she said, her words a beacon of wisdom in the sunlight. "Be there for her, Willy. Listen to her, support her, and above all, remind her that she is not alone."

William couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort from his mother's words. Yet as he continued to observe your forced smiles on your wonderful lips, his heart sank a little deeper.

And that's when he had a new idea.

**

William knew how much you loved Italy, especially the food, wine, and music. It had always been a dream travel destination for you, and having only been there once in your life, he thought it was time to revisit and create new memories in the wonderful country.

You needed some time away from your life in Toronto. So, with a bit of planning and assistance from his family, since planning wasn’t usually William’s strong suit, he managed to arrange a small trip to the homeland of pasta and pizza.

Furthermore, he even coordinated with your parents to look after Eliot while you were gone. Although he understood it would be difficult for you to be away from your baby for almost a week, he believed it was best for the two of you.

So, two days before departure, William revealed the surprise to you.

“Babe, we can’t just leave like that,” you exclaimed, your voice filled with concern and excitement. “What about your training? The season is about to start…”

William chuckled, loving your concern for his sport. “Don’t worry, I've sorted it all out with the team. Besides, I’ll make it back in time for the season start,” he reassured casually. “Baby, you need this. We need this. And that’s way more important right now.”

You could hear the sincerity in his voice, his eyes sparkling as he expressed his love and concern for you. Eventually, you nodded and flashed him a sweet smile.

Initially, William had planned to surprise you on the day of departure. However, knowing you would need time to pump and provide breast milk while away, he decided it was best to give you a couple of days to prepare.

With all preparations done, you were more than ready to enjoy your little getaway, just the two of you.

Florence was the flight destination, but the true paradise you were retreating to was a small semi-private luxury bed and breakfast a few hours outside the city. With a quaint restaurant where the hosts served local specialties, food courses, and only the finest local wines. The pool boasted a view over the beautiful countryside, filled with olive fields and vineyards, and outside the resort, small trails led through the gorgeous nature Italy offered.

Given the stress you both knew the new hockey season would bring, you spent most of your time simply relaxing in the warmth, enjoying the refreshing pool water, and indulging in the best Italian cuisine you'd had in years.

William had truly outdone himself this time.

From the moment you arrived, he devoted every available minute to showering you with love and affection. Though initially hesitant to touch you too much, he gradually caressed your smooth skin, gently exploring more and more until he felt you relax under his touch once again.

It wasn't easy for either of you. Despite William's efforts to convince you that your post-pregnancy figure was amazing, it took you two days before you felt comfortable wearing your swimsuit. And when he saw your wonderful curves, his eyes lit up like a bonfire. But what truly convinced you about your new physique were the compliments from the Italian mamas working at the small holiday destination.

"You had a baby?" one lady remarked on the third night during a late dinner. Completely taken aback by her sudden remark, you simply nodded. "You, beautiful woman. Strong! I can tell…" she added with confidence.

"See, I'm not the only one who thinks so," William chuckled lightly, flashing you his signature smirk.

"Of course, she bella donna!" another lady chimed in. "She is Mama! She made a miracolo… men? Hnf, they cannot do – no, only woman can be real strong."

And it was just the confidence boost you needed.

Listening to the words of the Italian women slowly made you realise that you should never be ashamed of your own body and skin. You had given William a son, and now nature proudly flaunted what you had been through.

William hadn’t seen you smile like this in so long, and he was beyond happy to finally hear your wonderful natural laughter again.

And after finishing tonight’s amazing dinner, retreating to your room and enjoying a refreshing shower, William was caught off guard by your soft voice.

“Willy…,” you almost whispered as you stood in the middle of the vacation home, and William slowly approached you. “I want you to touch me…”

It was a gentle plea, devoid of any neediness or desperation. It was delicate and timid.

“Are you sure?” William inquired, his chest nearly touching yours and his breath within reach.

And gently, you nodded, dropping the small towel that had wrapped your body. With your eyes meeting his, you slowly traced your palms up his torso and delicately wrapped them around his neck. “Yes, I need you…”

William couldn’t suppress a smile as he admired your beautiful features in the golden light of the setting sun on the horizon. Your eyes had found their sparkle again, and gently he felt your warm body against his.

It was as if you were falling in love all over again. Like experiencing your very first kiss when William leaned down to close the gap between you and gently connected your lips.

And immediately, you melted into his touch. Like a magical spell, you felt a pleasurable sensation course through you, an enchantment only William could evoke. Your knees went weak for him as his large hands cupped your face and deepened the kiss.

Your hands rested on his bare chest, almost feeling his heart beating, mirroring the rhythm of your own heart for him. Amidst the sun setting and the darkness of night slowly enveloping you, you allowed yourself to be guided by William. Onto the mattress, he carefully hovered over you, his lips always remaining connected as his tongue explored your mouth.

Your fingers found the lengths of his locks as you relished the feeling of his body against yours, his arms on each side of you as you connected deeply and passionately. Soon, you felt his member slowly growing firmer in his shorts, pressing against your inner thigh, and a strangely familiar sense of arousal building up within you.

Your cunt pulsed with anticipation, craving the attention it had been deprived of for months, and William was more than eager to satisfy it.

With his own throbbing length hard and proud in his shorts, he felt more than ready to be intimately close to you again. Breaking the kiss, he slowly discarded the only fabric separating you, and very carefully, he let his member brush against your core. His eyes locked onto yours, searching for a reaction, where he was met with your soft, sweet moans. Your fingers lightly tugged at his hair as you bit down on your lip, signalling your desire for him to be inside you.

Which he gladly obliged. With great care, William let the tip of his cock find your entrance, slowly pushing it in and stretching your walls in a way that was familiar to both of you. For a moment, he held still, relishing the sensation of your muscles around him and the soft gasps escaping your lips. He couldn’t help but admire you in the dim lights, taking in all your beautiful features, before delicately starting to move his hips in slow motions.

The lovemaking was slow and gentle, romance filling the air under the starlit sky and moonshine. With each tender thrust, every moan that escaped your lips was filled with nothing but love.

As he slid his cock in and out of your core, bringing you pleasure and stimulation, you both felt connected once again. Feeling the heat, the sparks igniting between you as you both drew closer and closer to climax.

Deep breaths were shared between hungry and sloppy kisses, both eager to reach climax. William's hands clenched the sheets with every thrust, feeling your muscles clenching around him, and he knew he wasn’t going to last much longer. After months of no sex with you, he felt himself in desperate need of release.

And he wasn’t alone. As your hands shifted to find his shoulder blades, your cunt pulsed as you were on the verge of orgasm. And when William increased his speed just a little, you knew you were about to surrender. Digging your nails into his skin, you closed your eyes, arched your back into the pillow, and with a loud moan, you let the orgasm wash over you.

It was one of the most wonderful orgasms you’d ever experienced. Finally in touch with William again, bringing you pleasure, you were in a state of bliss. Your mind was foggy, breaths heavy, and a small smile formed on your lips as you came down from the high.

Meanwhile, William was on the brink of climax. With a few more powerful thrusts, he let out a deep grunt, followed by heavy breaths, as he released himself into you. It wasn’t nearly as intense as the climaxes he’d experienced with you before, however, given how long it had been since you'd been intimate, this felt beyond amazing.

To you, it almost felt even better than you remembered it prior to your pregnancy.

And as you both calmed and regained your breaths, William pulled you into his sweaty body for an aftercare cuddle.

"Was it okay?" he spoke gently, finding your expression in the soft glow of the bedside lamp.

"It was amazing, Willy," you replied with a soft whisper, your eyes shimmering as they met his.

William couldn't contain his satisfied smile, finally able to enjoy your happiness again. "Good, baby, you're so amazing and beautiful. You're the most wonderful mom our son could have… you deserve the world."

You chuckled softly at William’s sweet words. You knew he meant them, coming straight from his heart, even though it hadn’t always been easy for him to verbalise his emotions.

"It’s all because of you, Willy. You bring out the best in me," you offered him a sweet smile, letting the comfort of his arms envelop you.

"No way… you’ve always brought out the best in me, babe, believe me," he chuckled as well. "To me, you’re just perfect… don’t you ever forget that."

A wave of sweet content washed over you as you absorbed every praise he had to offer. There was a soft moment of silence where you both simply enjoyed the relaxation and the soft Italian air coming through the curtains.

But then you softly broke it. “Although… we probably should have used protection, Willy…”

"What do you mean? We never use protection…"

"Well, exactly," you chuckled lightly. "I could get pregnant again…"

"Wait, you can get pregnant already?" he asked with sincere curiosity.

And you couldn’t contain your amusement. “Of course, babe!”

"Even when you breastfeed?"

"What? Yes, of course, Willy! Even when I breastfeed. That’s just a myth… honestly, don’t you know anything about a woman’s body?" you playfully asked, but William simply responded with another chuckle.

"Well... I do know a thing or two," he flashed you a mischievous grin before pulling you in for another deep kiss.

[the-gentleman-pining]

Righto party people, we had a good run, we got a beautiful S1 of OFMD unmarred by bullshit, which was the first time a lot of us had seen queer rep in that way. It meant a lot, it's been my hyperfixation for a couple years at this point! I even met Rhys, Vico, and Samson this weekend gone, which was unfortunately a bit soured by everything going on.

It boils down to this: how can I enjoy a show with themes of anti-colonialism and rising up against oppressive powers, knowing one of the biggest people behind its creation, Taika Waititi, is himself in signing letters in support of Israel as they occupy and mass slaughter Palestinians. The whole thing smacks of hypocrisy. As someone in the UK, I couldn't watch this recent season in a way that financially supported it anyway. But it's about more than that. I don't know how fans can continue to comfortably engage with it.

We had widespread abandonment and condemnation of JKR in queer circles after her TERF bullshit, and yes it took a while to catch on and for people to realise the smear campaign against an entire group of people wasn't worth them holding onto that piece of media. It's hard letting go of something that means so much. Or is it? I personally was never a huge HP fan, so I didn't share that struggle. But here? With OFMD? Yeah it's safe to say this show has been my life for a couple years. I'm heartbroken this is going down the way it has, and I don't mean that to have anything to do with the quality of the media in S2. It's not a relevant factor when its creator starring actor and co-creator is ADVOCATING GENOCIDE*. If that doesn't put you off, I don't really have more to say.

My conclusion? It's not hard to let go, you just don't think it's important.

I think, unless there is significant backtracking and work done to undo this damage, and even then probs not, this will be my last OFMD post.

Fuck you Taika, you betrayed your fans, but you also betrayed yourself by forgetting the things you used to stand for. Eat shit.

*some people have pointed out that pro-Israeli support is not inherently advocating genocide, because Taika may be ignorant to what's really going on. This is possible, however, firstly, if you don't fully understand something, don't fucking advocate for it. Secondly, intentional or not, he has contributed to a pro-genocidal rhetoric, by signing a letter that one-sidedly condemned Hamas taking hostages without awareness that Israel has taken far more, and for someone in his position of influence, that amounts to the same impact. Obscuring nuance pushes a biased narrative. It's insidious and easily denied.

[lains-reality]

Once a young woman came to Hafiz and said, “What is the sign of someone knowing God?” And Hafiz became very quiet and stood in silence for nearly a minute. Lovingly looking deep into the young woman's eyes, he then softly spoke: “My dear, they have dropped the knife. The person who knows God has dropped the cruel knife so often used upon their tender self and others.”[source]

please give yourself the grace of forgetting, of being sad, of failing, of fearing. you are allowed to. all is Self. you are okay now and here.

allow yourself to look at the insecurities, shame, guilt and fears.

give yourself the chance to respond, not react.

let vanessa be. vanessa is just a person like anyone else. thinks they are born and will die. every vanessa, no matter how well off they are, is scared shitless. but you treat your vanessa so badly.

you hate it. you want it gone. you see the body and mind as a cage without a key. it hurts. you curse it and nothing changes. you try to convince it and nothing changes. you curse it more.

It is not a matter of enduring, it is a matter of you being so crude to Vanessa, and expecting so much of her when she has no power. Do you feel the same way about the homeless man on the street corner? Do you constantly chastise him in your head, blame him for his circumstances? Even if you are the kind of person to judge based on appearances, you do for a moment and move on with your life. That's because you never thought he was you so how could you feel pain on his behalf? You may do the opposite and feel bad for his situation for a bit, but you still leave the matter alone as he's none of your business and you have your own things to worry about. - post source

vanessa is doing the best it can. it sings, dances, loves! it bleeds, it shudders, it hurts. all is the wide expression of Self.

and yet you hide from the pain, from the hurt, from the thoughts, the feelings. this is not the fullness of Self.

forgive yourself. let go of the shame and guilt. stop shaming vanessa for exsiting just like any other person in the street. stop carrying all responsibilities of the world. it's already taken care of.

you breathe with no help, you shit with no help, you eat with no help, you sleep with no help. and even if you do need help, the inability to do so, happens without your help. your amazon package comes through, your sibling grows 2 cm, the sun rises and falls, the seasons pass by. all by itself. what's orchestrating it all? Self. what other reason have we given ourself the world, other than out of love?

Leave poor Vanessa alone and stop assigning her the responsibility and accountability of everything that the dream shows. The entire dream is all an expression of the Infinite Being, not hers (the ego) which she is just one more creation of. And it doesn't have to be your (the Self's/I AM's) dream anymore when you stop identifying with it. - post source

its already out of vanessa's hands. vanessa can't do anything. let that be a celebration: all is taken care of. unconditonally.

"why is it all taken care of?"

"why not!"

"but why should *i* get the world?"

"why not?"

"but-"

its already all here for you. its already as it is. what is vanessa gonna do to change the infinte? why would the infinite need changing anyway?

Treat it with compassion, stop bullying it, it's not its fault you're not where you should be. You think he's in the way so you get mad, you get frustrated it's not following instructions or refuses to step aside. But the ego is not the problem, nor in the way. Your attitude toward it is the problem. Let it be, it doesn't know any better! - post source

give yourself the permission to exist as you are. give yourself permission to be as you are, right now. start asking 'did i give permission for this?' you'll find how much stuff is not even your choice. as ada said its just tolerance and endurance of the forced vanessa.

now you realise you don't have to be a forced vanessa. so you go completely the other direction and try to (forcefully) change the vanessa. you're still holding up standards, ideas & roles to yourself. the things that made you hate vanessa in the first place. just maybe, for this moment hold nothing. drop the knife.

“Stop trying to heal yourself, fix yourself, even awaken yourself. Let go of letting go. Stop trying to fast-forward the movie of your life. It gets so exhausting, doesn’t it, always trying to get there, chasing futures that never seem to arrive, living on second-hand promises. Instead, bow deeply to yourself as you actually are. Be here. Honour this present scene in the movie. Your pain, your sorrow, your doubts, your deepest longings, your fearful thoughts, are not mistakes, and they aren’t asking to be healed. They are asking to be held. Here, now, lightly, in the loving arms of present awareness…” — Jeff Foster

[eemoo1o-animoo]

10 Grelle-based paraphernalia that I found on eBay, in no particular order but my subjective deeming of relevance or importance

Possibly part one of a series? Perhaps?

If so, then I probably won’t contain it to only eBay, and I’m going off of what comes up for someone who’s based in the UK, so maybe there’s more or less stuff available if you’re in other countries due to shipping limitations, etc.? But eBay at the moment is my main source, and I’m only doing this — work that anyone can do, nothing exceptionally thorough or insightful — because I’m just a little bored, and I know Grelle is the most valued in the fandom and TSOGTR hasn’t been writing itself for the past year and a quarter, so why would it start now?

This is written at 3AM-6AM on 29/8/2024, so if this is found long after this date then there’s a chance my sources have already been bought out or deleted for whatever reason.

1.

Grell Sutcliff Funko Pop 18 Kuroshitsuji Black Butler POP! Vinyl Anime Figure

At the time of writing this, there are no bids for this and so the price remains at £21.99 (item and shipping). The current bid is due to end on ≈1/9/2024. Wait for the last second to bid one pence higher than the asking price and you’re golden.

I actually have one of these, but it was gifted to me, and so I don’t know how much mine was sold for, but seeing as the four Black Butler Funko Pops have been vaulted and are sold for way higher in other places online, I think this is a pretty good deal.

(Fun fact, the person who gifted her to me as well as tracked down other cheap listings for the other three called her Greta. Consistently. So. Greta. Greta Sutcliff.)

As we can see from the item’s pictures, the figure has been taken out of its box, at the very least just to be show-cased or inspected, but it does appear to come with the box. Here is a listing on Amazon (9.99 GBP, excluding shipping) for 10 Funko Pop display sleeves that should match the item’s measurements.

The current conversions for this item’s price (18.99 GBP) are as follow:

25.06 USD

36.91 AUD

33.77 CAD

22.52 Euro

2,103.26 INR

855,31 Turkish Lira

39.92 NZD

3,623.33 Yen

Obviously I’m not including every conversion in here, only the most obvious/prevalent. If your country’s currency isn’t here, then my apologies, and feel free to bring it to my attention (with currency named) so that I may add it to any future episodes to this possible series, or to edit this post back with the conversions of that time.

2.

Black Butler PVC Keychain Grell

The description of this listing says that this is officially licensed and from one reverse image search to find a bunch of listings across several websites for it, I’m inclined to believe that this is actually an official piece of merch and not a fan-made item that is being resold as I had originally thought it to be. (Wow, I’m such a knowledgable Black Butler fan. I know, I know.)

There’s not much to say on this other than the fact that it’s cute and I think a few pence has been shaved off from the original selling price, though I’m not too sure. I imagine it would have easily gone for 8.99 GBP, but again I’m not too sure; it’s 3AM after all and this isn’t a serious project for me.

The current conversions go as followed:

11.87 USD

17.47 AUD

15.99 CAD

10.66 Euro

996.15 INR

405,49 Turkish Lira

18.90 NZD

1,715.62 Yen

3.

Grelle Black Butler manga plushie Anime Soft Toy

It’s not the best price, I admit. If you’re looking for something cheaper then maybe go for the 5" plush, and there’s another listing on AnimeWare, but once tax and shipping get evolved it ends up being more or less the same price, anyway.

I think this is under the same line as Plushlois comes from, and to that I say: if someone buys her, will that come back? Will Grelle’s face be remade by @fancymeatcomputers, as @nullbutler’s Plushlois once had?

Anyway, she’s super cute. Her hair is a bit too saturated, but that’s not much to lament over, and she’s pricey, but is still far less expensive than any available Plushlois listing I could find (£52!! Usually!!).

Here are the current conversions:

39.61 USD

58.30 AUD

53.35 CAD

35.58 Euro

3,323.16 INR

1,351.58 Turkish Lira

63.01 NZD

5,727.47 Yen

4.

Black Butler Kuroshitsuji Grell Undertaker Anime two sided Pillow Case Cover 250

I’d originally listed another pillow for listing number four, which goes for the same price, but decided not to as Grelle is more prominent on this one.

Not much to say about this other than as far as I can tell it’s just the pillowcase and not a case and a pillow, but if you want to add a lil extra something to your Grelle shrine or limit your chances of finding a normie partner by having this as the centrepiece to your 20-something pillow statement on your romantic four-post bed.

Here are the current conversions:

7.91 USD

11.64 AUD

10.65 CAD

7.10 Euro

663.67 INR

269.94 Turkish Lira

12.58 NZD

1,143.54 Yen

5.

Black butler Grell Sutcliffe figure Kuroshitsuji SEGA PVC Scale Anime s01

Another shambolic price, I know. But out of all the non-Funko Pop Grelle figures listed, this is definitely the cheapest.

Out of all of the non-Funko Pop Black Butler figures, it’s far from it. I think the cheapest figures went to Ciel and Sebastian, but with a massive gap between the cheapest Ciel figure versus the cheapest Sebastian figure (there’s a lot of listings for this particular figure, all with free shipping and of similar prices). There’s also a listing that sells Sebastian and Grelle together with free postage, which would value each figure as far less than what this one figure is being sold for.

The current conversions (of 130.22 GBP) go as follows:

172.00 USD

252.73 AUD

231.50 CAD

154.48 Euro

14,430.37 INR

5,874.98 Turkish Lira

273.31 NZD

24,865.90 Yen

6.

Black Butler Grell Sutcliff Cosplay Costume Red Death Men Full Set Outfits New

I’m not much of cosplayer or a cosplay fan, but from the few full cosplays I found that range from £40-50, this seems like a good price.

There’s also a good few listings for Grelle-style shoes? The cheapest of which would be here. And both the shoes and the clothing come in men’s sizes, so it’s a match if you ask me.

The current conversions of the cosplay’s price are:

23.76 USD

34.92 AUD

31.98 CAD

21.34 Euro

1,993.77 INR

811.52 Turkish Lira

37.76 NZD

3,435.09 Yen

7.

Kuroshitsuji Black Butler Madam Red Angelina Dalles Anime Figurine - Play Arts

Look. I know this isn’t a Grelle figure, but I assume that most if not all Grelle fans are also Madame Red fans. And you have to admit that this is a damn good price for a figure of this type. In fact, I’d say this figure is the second cheapest, right behind the aforementioned Ciel figure.

Also the seller has the username “welsh lady”. Surely it’d basically be treason if I didn’t promote it.

The conversions of the item price (6.99 GBP) go as follows:

9.23 USD

13.57 AUD

12.43 CAD

8.29 Euro

774.85 INR

315.29 Turkish Lira

14.68 NZD

1,336.09 Yen

8.

USED Dolk Black Butler Book of Circus Grell Sutcliff Cast Doll 700mm Japan RARE

This is a fucking awful price. It hurts just to imagine buying this. However, it seems like a rare or custom-made doll, in a fancy box, and it was the only listing I could find of it, meaning it’s not a re-sell.

There’s not much to say — as you can see I ranked it pretty low on the relevancy scale, but I don’t know: maybe someone’s into this sort of thing, especially if it comes to Grelle.

The item prices are converted as follows:

2,805.52 USD

4,123.16 AUD

3,776.66 CAD

2,519.24 Euro

235,385.31 INR

95,779.75 Turkish Lira

4,458.47 NZD

405,826.75 Yen

9.

1 x playing card Black Butler Anime Sebastian Michaelis - Jack of Hearts ZT 85

For one playing card, to me this price seems ghastly. There’s also a Sebastian variant for the exact same price, but that’s all I can find in this style. The other listings for Black Butler playing cards aren’t in this style, coming wholly in colour with patterned frames. As far as I can see, on eBay there are only two listings for this type of playing card, and I’ve already linked them both to this post.

The current conversions of the item price (2.49 GBP) are:

3.29 USD

4.83 AUD

4.43 CAD

2.95 Euro

276.04 INR

112,34 Turkish Lira

5.23 NZD

476.23 Yen

10.

Black Butler Ceramic Mug Grell, Sebastian

There’s a more expensive mug with just Grelle on it that I’d contemplated listing here instead. (And, hey! From Germany, too. The TSOGTR imagery just won’t quit.) But this one is cheaper.

Besides, enough scrubbing with some iron wool will get rid of that ugly demon mug (no pun intended) in no time, surely!

The current conversions go as follows:

19.62 USD

28.84 AUD

26.41 CAD

17.62 Euro

1,646.22 INR

669,76 Turkish Lira

31.17 NZD

2,841.32 Yen

[lunarmoves]

So, Bleeding Wires AU 👀

Would there possibly be a moment after y/n is taken to Sun when he realizes he's genuinely scaring them? Like logically they must know what he has done, and can probably imagine it too, but at one point they witness an instance of that violence/unhinged behavior and Sun has to see the same horror and fear that he must have seen a ton of times in other people's faces when they were looking at him, but never before on y/n's

sun when he realizes his actions have consequences and those consequences include scaring the human love of his life:

LMFAOOOO anyways. cw for typical apocalypse violence, death, murder, torture (sun literally kills someone)

hmmm okay after some hm-ing and hah-ing im going to add a little tidbit to the bleeding wires lore that i think will deepen things.

so.... im imagining that sun is not good at deciphering human emotions at first, particularly in arc1. he reads them completely differently at times. yeah he understands when harsh emotions like anger and arrogance or whatever are directed at him, but not the softer ones like adoration, kindness, etc. moon is considerably better, but sun is the one mistaking fright for awe or nervousness as anger or something. which ties into the whole thing with him avoiding his own emotions and such. can't be good at deciphering what someone else is feeling when you yourself reject all feelings and their associated labels

and so, when he starts feeling his fans go into overdrive around you, or the way he can't get you out of his mind at times... he thinks he hates you. like really hates you.

it's the opposite, of course. but he doesn't realize that. and maybe he's a bit meaner to you as a result. maybe he shows more of that superiority complex around you and it drives you away as a result. but then... with you gone... now there's just something inside of him that aches? whagt the fuck?

and yeah, he brushes it off at first, but well..... after a while of not hearing or seeing you, he can't ignore it any longer.

as a result, he gets better once he realizes that he actually has a big fat crush on you and takes more time to study his feelings and how this may be displayed on others and on himself. but it's hard bc some people show emotions in different ways, yknow? he's no expert, but the entire apocalypse definitely makes him better with deciphering fear, nerves, and guilt (since that's what he predominantly sees as, yknow, the leader of the apocalypse and all)

so when you wake up in sun's home in the celestial city, you are understandably scared and wary. you've only ever heard stories or rumors about what has happened--how sun led a robot army across your state and many others. how he was the face of the revolution and the one forming strategic plans that he sent to other robots to aid them in the takeover. there is no doubt in your mind that he has massacred thousands of people, even if you've never seen it. he has enough blood on his hands to fill an entire ocean lol. so understandably, you're nervous and avoidant around him. there's no telling when he might kill you--it could be over the smallest thing. or so you think.

in all your time at the pizzaplex, you'd only ever seen a handful of emotions on sun. and honestly? from what you see of the sun post-revolution, he's not much different. still cold, still calculative, still with that complex and arrogance and faked cheerfulness. but there's something different about him that you can't place. it scares you, though, so you try not to come into contact with him too often, sticking to your room or holding short conversations with him when he seeks you out.

(it's bloodlust, you eventually realize, way later down the line. and you do not like it one bit)

((you're right, of course, but there is also a particular... rough sort of softness to him? begrudging, almost. you are never able to read this off of him, though, and never will))

lmao i'm imagining sun being awkward and hesitant as hell, not knowing how to address you. and the fact that you're avoiding him does not help. it actually... makes him frustrated. and maybe... maybe one day he takes this out on some humans he's captured to torture some information out of them on the whereabouts of another human base.

sun never told you there's nowhere you can't go in his home. and, understandably, you are too nervous to really do anything to him/his living spaces with all the fucking cameras all over the place. your nerves don't stop you from exploring, though. if there's even the smallest chance of you spotting a means to escape, you'll take it.

and well.... your curiosity and wandering leads you further into the building. where there's a faint clanging sound in the distance. at first, you think it's a broken pipe or something. but as you get closer, you realize there's another sound associated with it.

an odd squelching. and this- this rasping that at first sounds like wind going through an odd opening. but then you realize it's not rasping--it's wheezing. gurgling, like someone on the brink of death from an open doorway to your right.

your curiosity is morbid. you peek into the room. and immediately you retch at the sight.

sun hears you--he spins around and it's like he took a dive into that fucking blood ocean he created. his smile is wide--sharp like a razor and almost manic. his hand is different--modded as it is to look like some dangerous machete. you cannot help the sudden weakness in your legs, the way you stumble back and nearly trip over yourself in your haste to get away from the thick stench of death that permeates through the air.

and--sun, after teaching himself, forcing himself, how to read emotions better on humans--comes face to face with an expression he soon realizes he never wants to see on you ever again. you've become one and the same as the very humans he's killed, and he does not like that association.

and ahhh well.... he never should have taught himself about emotions.

it wasn't worth it, in the end, being able to recognize the fear on your face (because of him, it was because of him) and the way it makes something inside him pang.

[badkitty3000]

You Can't Go Home Again

Chapter 6

Link to Chapter Five

Link to Chapters 3 and 4

Link to Chapters 1 and 2

Link to Chapter 7

All Five wants to do is rest. But when yet another apocalypse threatens to doom them all, he doesn't have that luxury. This time, the only solution for the Hargreeves to try and save the world is to unite Five with another, alternate version of himself.

Five starts to spiral when he is faced with the alternate life that he could have had, if only he hadn't gone and ruined everything. But maybe, just maybe, there's still time for him to obtain the happy ending he deserves.

An alternate season three rewrite for a request I received.

Warnings: None

More chapters will be posted as I continue writing this multi-chapter fic. Enjoy!

Chapter Six: Running Out Of Time

After another long night, and another painful transfer of powers, the second watch was complete. It wasn’t entirely necessary to build the second one, but it seemed like a good idea for backup, and since both Fives had contributed so much to making them, it only seemed fair that they both had one. This meant that Five and his siblings could return home with relative safety and correct both timelines. Once they were out of the timeline they were in now, with the Sparrows, things should return to how they were before the kugelblitz was activated. In theory, anyway. There was only one problem preventing them from going now.

“What do you mean Klaus is not here?” Five hissed through gritted teeth, leaning into Luther’s personal space and staring menacingly up at him.

“Uh, well…” Luther started, rubbing the back of his neck; clearly intimidated by his much smaller brother. “He said he was getting bored and he wanted to get out of the house.”

“And you just let him go?!”

“I mean, yeah…it’s Klaus! He’s always wandering off, but eventually he comes back.”

“Great!” Five said as he threw his hands in the air and let them drop to his sides again. “Just fantastic!” He turned to Luther again. “You know, as the leader of this family, you really do a piss poor job of actually leading.”

“Hey, don’t yell at him!” Diego interjected. “We can’t all just sit around waiting for your next order. Who do you think you are? Dad?”

Five laughed sarcastically. “Dad may have been a heartless asshole, but at least he knew how to keep you people in line. And now that I know what trying to accomplish that is like, I actually have a little more respect for the old man.”

“Come on, Five, that’s not fair,” Viktor said.

Realizing he probably was being a bit too harsh, Five backed off a little. After taking a deep breath, he spoke very evenly, trying to keep his anger in check. “Ok, let’s regroup here. Now, did Klaus tell anyone where he was going?”

The rest of the siblings exchanged glances that told Five, no, he did not tell them where he was going. As he let out a loud sigh, Jack appeared in the middle of the room with a big smile on his face. He was still very proud of his new blinking skills.

“I know where he went,” the little boy offered.

Five smiled. “Great, Jack. Where?”

“He said something about meeting a girl.”

“A girl?”

Jack blinked to the other side of the room, just to show off. “Yeah…her name is Mary Jane.”

At first there was a second of confusion and then the light bulb went on for everyone at the same time. Five groaned. “Damn it…of course our idiot brother decides to go get stoned when the world is ending.”

“As opposed to drinking himself half to death. Yeah, what an asshole,” Lila snarked with her arms folded across her chest.

Five rolled his eyes. “Fine, point taken. But we need to find Klaus so we can get out of here. I don’t know when the next kugel wave is going to come, but we’re already overdue for one so we probably don’t have much time.”

Luther raised a hand to speak. “Ok, but how are we going to know where to start? How would Klaus even know where to go in this timeline? Everything here is different.”

“It’s Klaus, he’s very resourceful,” Diego said. “I’m sure he’d figure something out…wait! Holy shit, I bet that fucker went back to the hotel.”

Allison frowned. “You think?”

“Yeah, why not? You saw all the weirdos that were there, and that used to be his hangout back in the day. It makes sense.”

“Ok, Diego and I will go find Klaus,” Five told them. “The rest of you stay here. The other me is still working downstairs and I want to make sure someone is here with Marie and the kids if another wave hits.”

“Aw…you do care! I knew it!” Luther gushed with a smile that quickly faded after the glare he received from his brother.

“Of course, I care, idiot. Despite what you all think, I’m not some monster that gets off on watching innocent kids die.”

Jack had blinked out of the room while the adults had been talking, but he suddenly appeared again right when Five was in the middle of his sentence. This time, his sister Maddie was with him. They both looked up at the group with horrified faces.

“We’re going to die?” Jack asked.

Allison jumped in. “No! No no no no…of course not, sweetie.”

“But that’s what you said. We might die.” Jack’s voice trembled and he put a protective hand on his little sister’s shoulder.

Maddie’s eyes started to well up with tears and Five tipped his head back with an exasperated sigh. “Christ.” He turned toward the kids. “Look, no one is dying, ok? At least not if I can help it. And I know your dad would never let that happen, either, ok?”

There was a very small nod from both kids, but it wasn’t very convincing. Five continued, using a much softer voice than his normal brusque one. “I need you both to stay here and be brave, ok? As long as you’re with our family, nothing bad is going to happen. Do you believe me?”

Again, there was a very slight nod, but they still looked terrified. It occurred to Five that maybe their parents had been keeping them in the dark about the severity of the situation. And now he’d gone and screwed that up. Great. Just what I need. More shit to feel guilty about.

“Who wants to play Yahtzee?” Luther asked enthusiastically as he tried to unsuccessfully change the subject. The rest of the adults, as well as the kids, just stared at him with various expressions of bewilderment. His shoulders drooped. “Ok…maybe not the best time.”

Five pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers. “The plan stands. Diego, you and I are going to the hotel.”

“I’m coming too,” Allison said firmly, standing up with that pose that meant she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

“Fine,” Five said, just to move things along. “Let’s go then.”

**********************

The outside world was bleak, and getting bleaker by the hour. Each new wave from the kugelblitz brought more destruction to the city and the world around them. The streets were deserted of people, with cars left in the middle of the road after their drivers had evaporated. Buildings were starting to crumble and crack, trees were being uprooted, and the sky was turning all sorts of interesting colors. It looked like Doomsday for sure.

As the three siblings walked along the couple miles to the hotel, Five got lost in his own thoughts again. When they had left, the other Five was still doing a few last minute adjustments to both watches, and Five knew that once those were finished there was no time to waste. He needed to get his family out of there before anything else happened. He had nothing really to base it on except for a strong hunch, but he suspected that he and his siblings, along with anyone else that had powers, were going to be the last to go when the world collapsed in on itself. Which meant this would at least buy his other self and his kids a little more time. He wasn’t sure about Marie, but maybe her proximity to them would be enough.

As Five trudged along with his brother and sister, Diego suddenly spoke up. “Hey, this is like old times. The three of us doing some recon together? Just like with Gerald Jenkins.”

“Harold,” both Five and Allison corrected in unison.

“Whatever,” Diego grumbled, taking out a knife that had been strapped to the outside of his leg and flipping it in the air as he walked. “I’m just saying, this is the good stuff, right here. Us, working together, solving crimes and shit.”

“We’re just trying to find Klaus,” Five mumbled, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“Well, it’s almost like solving a crime.” Diego was silent for a minute before speaking again, this time quieter. “You know, what you said back at the house…that’s not true.”

Five looked up. “What are you talking about?”

“You said we think you’re a monster. That’s not true.”

Five was silent and then Allison piped up. “He’s right. You’re not a monster, Five. An asshole, maybe, but not a monster. You’re our brother.”

Five didn’t know what to say. He was not used to having to show emotions, let alone express them out loud. The only person he’d ever poured his heart out to was Dolores, so this was definitely new territory. Say thank you or something, idiot! They’re being nice. Be nice back!

“Yeah…” Five cleared his throat. “Ok,” he managed to rasp out, still looking at the ground as he walked. That was all he could get out at the moment, but he hoped they’d be able to read between the lines of those two lame little words. Thank you. Thank you for caring.

No one spoke the rest of the way to the hotel, but Five could see Diego and Allison exchanging glances over his head. He should have brought a flask.

As soon as they entered the lobby of the Hotel Obsidian, something felt off. Which was saying a lot, considering what a weird place it was to begin with. It was quiet. And empty. At first glance there was no sign of Klaus, either.

“Klaus!” Diego yelled out, his voice booming and echoing through the vast lobby.

Right on cue, Klaus’s head popped out from behind a red velvet couch he had been sleeping on. He looked dazed, but otherwise ok.

“Oh, hey guys,” he said airily as he sat up and turned around to face them. “What are you doing here?”

Diego threw his hands in the air. “Jesus Christ, Klaus! What are YOU doing here?”

“Well, you know…I was getting antsy in that house, so I decided to take a little walk.”

“You went to get high,” Five stated flatly.

“Well, there was that, too. But, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, there’s not a lot of people to ask for such products these days.”

The four of them took a look around the lobby again, confirming they were still the only people there.

“What happened?” Allison asked.

Klaus shrugged, standing up and stretching. “Kugel-ed I guess? It was like this when I got here. Except guess who was here? Dad.”

“What? Dad was here?” Diego asked, holding his knife in a way that meant he was ready for an attack.

“Did you talk to him?” Five asked.

Klaus nodded and then laughed. “He said we sucked so bad back in Dallas that he made sure not to adopt us as babies. Then he wanted to recruit me for some experiment or something. Oblivion something. I don’t know, I didn’t understand completely. He said it would save the world and stop the kugelblitz.”

Five looked around nervously, expecting Reginald to come striding around the corner at any moment.

“Don’t worry, he left. Said he’ll be back with the Sparrows, though. But he wanted me to wait here for him.”

“Klaus…” Allison said warily. “You weren’t waiting here for Dad, were you?”

Klaus looked guiltily to the side but when Diego and Five made disappointed groaning noises, he started to plead his case. “Listen, this Reggie is way nicer than our version ever was! And you had to be there, but what he was saying made sense. Dad always told us we were going to save the world. Well, I think this is what he meant.”

Diego stepped close to him, getting in his face and pointing the knife at his chest. “Klaus, I swear to god, you better not be considering listening to that bastard. He tortured us! Don’t you remember how many times he locked you in that mausoleum and left you there?”

“Of course I remember!” Klaus shot back. “But this is not that guy. I told you, he’s a much softer Reginald.”

Five sighed heavily. “Fuck, Klaus…we don’t have time for whatever Daddy issues you’re trying to work out here. Reginald is a conniving bastard in any timeline and we need to go!”

“But what if he’s right? What if you’re wrong and Dad is right?”

“Klaus, you can’t possibly think that, can you?” Allison asked in a slightly gentler voice than her brothers’. “Think about it. Are you really going to trust him over Five?”

“Dad has never done shit for us. But at least Five has tried. And he’s trying again, so you need to trust him.” Diego added, still in Klaus’s face.

Five’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. He hadn’t really thought about the fact that his siblings may actually trust him. Not after what happened the last two times. He assumed they were just going along with whatever he said because they had no other choice. But now they did have a choice. And it seemed they were choosing him.

No one spoke for a minute while Klaus’s eyes darted from Five to Allison, and then back to Diego. He let out a long sigh and his shoulders dropped forward.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” He turned to Five. “You really think you and the other, hotter you, can get us back?”

“I do,” Five said with a nod. “But we have to leave. Now.”

As Diego backed off, Klaus nodded. “Alright, then. Lead the way, Cinco.”

As the four of them left out the revolving door, getting stuck only once, Klaus took one last look back at the hotel before moving on.

Diego noticed. “So, what exactly did Dad say to you to try and convince you?”

Klaus looked up with a sad smile. “He said I was truly exceptional and would be a great asset to him. Which, I realize isn’t a big deal under normal circumstances, but it was coming from Dad. Can you even think of a time when he complimented any of us?”

“Yeah, I guess I see your point,” Diego answered with shake of his head. “Damn, he really fucked us all up if that’s the biggest compliment he’s ever given his own kids.”

Five nodded as he walked quickly along. “The man is diabolical, there’s no doubt about that.” He turned to Klaus, uncharacteristically sincere. “I’m sorry you had to speak with him, I know that wasn’t easy. Thank you for trusting me.”

Klaus grinned and clapped his smaller brother on his shoulder, earning him a glare and a swat at his hand. “Hey, if anyone can get us out of here and back home, it’s you my little brosef. And might I add, I cannot wait until you are the same age as that other you, because damn…you are one smoking piece of a—”

The other three siblings groaned, cutting him off, and Five looked up at Klaus with a disgusted look on his face. “Please. Never say that again.”

“Yeah, dude, that’s pretty weird. He’s your brother,” Diego said. Then he looked at Allison. “No offense.”

She rolled her eyes but then she laughed and shrugged. “God, we are a weird fucking family.”

“That’s for damn sure,” Five muttered.

*********************************

As the small group of siblings continued down the street, another pulsing wave rushed over them and their surroundings. More buildings started to fall and giant cracks were forming in the pavement of the streets. It had been gradual, but they noticed the sky was starting to turn black with dark clouds and flashes of orange light. Allison jumped out of the way as a falling brick nearly bashed her in the head.

“Fuck,” Five exhaled. “We have to go.”

Allison brushed off the concrete dust that had fallen on her shoulder. “What if that wave just took out everyone else at the house?”

Five nodded nervously. “I’m a little concerned about that myself.” He glanced around at the other three. “We need to get there fast.”

Diego moaned when he realized what Five meant. “Oh…not again! You know I’m going to get sick, right?”

“It doesn’t matter, we’re running out of time.” Yanking Klaus closer by his wrist, and holding Allison’s hand with his other, Five gave a pointed look toward Diego.

Groaning again, Diego reluctantly grabbed onto Klaus’s arm. “I really hate this—,” he started to say before being swept up in one of Five’s blinks.

As soon as they were dropped out of the portal into the middle of the living room at the house, Diego lurched forward, holding his stomach.

“Oh god, out of the way!” he warned as he went sprinting to the bathroom.

Lila looked after him with a small shake of her head. “Giant baby.”

The other three looked around, silently counting all of the bodies in the room. It appeared that no one was missing. Even the other Five, Marie, and the kids were there. Everyone was safe. For now, at least.

“Klaus!” Viktor cried with a smile. “Oh, I’m so happy they found you.”

With a quiet laugh, Klaus flapped a hand at him. “You know me, I always come back. Like a stray cat.”

“So, you were at the hotel?” Luther asked.

Klaus nodded, but before he could explain himself, Five interjected. “Yes, he was. And he met Dad, who is definitely up to something nefarious. It’s just another reason we need to get out of here as quickly as possible. If we can restore this timeline back to normal, hopefully Reggie won’t be able to carry out whatever he has planned.”

The other Five, who had been standing with an arm around his wife’s waist, was listening intently. At the mention of Reginald’s name, he instantly tensed.

“What was he planning?” he asked Klaus; his jaw already set in anger.

“I’m not sure, but he said he needed me and the Sparrows to carry it out.” Klaus swallowed hard and looked over at Five and Allison. “Actually, he didn’t just say he needed me. He said he needed all of us. Something to do with needing as many of our powers as possible.”

Allison put a hand on her hip. “Klaus, what the hell? Why didn’t you tell us that?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know! I didn’t want you to get all weird and I figured it didn’t matter anyway. We weren’t staying.”

“I knew it,” the older-looking Five said, stepping away from his wife and balling his hands into fists at his side. “I’ve known that bastard has been up to something for years, and here’s the proof.” He looked down at his kids who were understandably worried and crowded in next to their mother. “I’ll be goddamned if I let that bastard get a hold of me or my kids.” He scanned the rest of the faces in the room. “Or any of you, for that matter. He needs to be stopped.”

Five shook his head. “It won’t matter once we can get out of here. Things will return to normal.”

Just as he said that, another wave ripped through the house and reversed itself, leaving everyone with a strange tingling feeling throughout their bodies. The kids screamed, but when the wave passed, everyone was still accounted for and the house was still standing. Outside, a large tree cracked in half and fell across the small front lawn. In the distance, more rumblings of falling buildings and cracking concrete could be heard. An eerie, orange glow seeped through the windows.

“Go get the watches,” Five told his doppelganger. “We have to go.”

The other Five hesitated. Determination and anger were written all over his face and he seemed to not even hear Five. He was lost in his own head.

“Five!” Marie said loudly, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Go! Hurry!”

He turned to her, his eyes filling with tears. “Right.” Then he took her chin in his hand and kissed her softly with a smile before bending down to hug and kiss each one of his kids. “I love you all.” Before his confused wife could respond, he was gone in a blast of blue light.

“That was weird,” Luther said under his breath to Viktor, who nodded in agreement.

“Diego!” Lila yelled out. “Are you still alive?”

“Yeah,” came his weak voice from the bathroom. “Barely.”

“Well, chuck it all up and get on with it! We gotta go!”

Five looked around nervously. Something was wrong, he could feel it. And the way his other self just acted was not sitting well with him.

“Shit,” he said to himself. Then he looked up at Marie. “I think he’s gone.”

“What do you mean he’s gone?” she asked with wide eyes.

“Come on!”

Five hurried toward the basement steps, with Marie and Klaus right behind him. When they got to the bottom of the stairs, Five saw what he was afraid of. No other Five. And only one watch on the table.

“Shit,” he groaned again.

“Oh my god,” Marie whispered as tears started to form in her eyes. “Why would he leave us like this?”

Five walked over to the desk where he had found the file folder containing the other Five’s collection of Reggie-related things. He opened the drawer and pulled the folder out, holding it up for Marie to see.

“Do you know about this?”

She shook her head. “No, what is it?”

“He’s been tracking Reginald for years. I wasn’t sure why before, but the fact that he kept it a secret from you, and his reaction just now to what Klaus told him, tells me that it’s not anything good. The watch is missing, too.” He ran a hand through his hair and exhaled a long breath. “Fuck…I think I know where he went.”

“How do you know?” Klaus asked.

“Because he’s a version of me, remember?”

Marie wiped at the tears on her face as Klaus put an arm around her shoulder. “The whole world is falling apart and he just left us? I can’t believe he would do that. I can’t…you have to get him back…I need him here. I just…please…” she cried while covering her face with her hands.

“I have the other watch and I’ll bring him back. I promise,” Five told her; his voice gentle but firm.

“I’m coming with you,” Klaus said. Five opened his mouth to argue and Klaus held up a hand. “Don’t even try arguing, old man. I’m not letting you go by yourself.”

Five thought about telling him no, but decided it would take up too much precious time. They needed to find the other Five and bring him back to his family. So, he just nodded at his brother and grabbed the other watch off the table. He strapped it to his wrist and held it up to start setting the coordinates of where he was 99% sure his other self had gone.

“So, where are we going, anyway?” Klaus asked, as he gently let Marie go and put a hand on Five’s shoulder so he could be transported along with him.

Five looked up at Klaus with a worried face. “The Academy. November 11, 2002.”

********************************

Five had been troubled by his other self’s obsession with their father, but only from the standpoint that he knew it wasn’t healthy. He understood being angry and resentful towards Reggie; that was a given. All of his kids had some lasting trauma from him. Even the stupid Sparrows probably didn’t have much love for the man. But Five had decades alone to work through his anger, whereas this version of himself had been carrying it around with him ever since he had been thrown out onto the street as a kid. It was understandable that he had a big chip on his shoulder.

But Five could see now that this obsession had reached a new level as soon as Klaus told him about Reggie needing their powers. Of course he was going to be protective of his kids, Five certainly understood that. They weren’t even his kids, but he still felt a strong connection to them. So, just the thought of Reggie trying to harm them in any way was the push his other self had needed to make him take action. Even if that meant leaving his family and placing himself in danger in order to protect them all.

Five had hoped he had set the watch correctly, because the last thing he needed was another show down with the Sparrows, even if they were only kids. So, when he and Klaus appeared in the basement of the Academy, he was relieved to see he’d calculated it correctly. They were alone, as predicted, with the everyone in the house presumably at the dinner table.

“Wow, this is weird,” Klaus said, looking around at the familiar surroundings. “It looks the same.”

Five was already on the move, creeping quietly to the stairs. When he realized Klaus wasn’t following him, he loudly whispered, “Klaus! Come on!”

“Right,” his brother said, hurrying to catch up with him. “So what’s the plan?”

“We need to get upstairs without being seen, first of all. Then, we need to find my other self before he does something stupid.”

“Are you sure he’s even here?”

Five shrugged as he made his way up the stairs. “No, I’m not. But stick close to me in case we need to jump out of here fast, ok?”

With a nod, Klaus crept in closer to Five, stepping on his heel and bumping into the back of him, almost knocking him over. Five stopped and turned around with his usual irksome glare at his sibling. “Not that close.”

“Sorry,” Klaus said with a guilty smile.

As they arrived on the main level, Five held a hand out behind him to stop Klaus until he did a quick surveillance of the area. They were in the main foyer area, with the doors to the living room closed. Five could smell their mother’s cooking again, so he knew they must be at the dining table. That feeling of regret and shame started to wash over him again. They may have been in a completely different timeline, but the day and time were the same, and it was one Five would never forget.

“Now what?” Klaus whispered.

Five was about to answer when they heard a small shuffling noise nearby. Five motioned to Klaus to follow him, making his way down one of the hallways. It was dimly lit, just like everything else in the house, but they could clearly make out a figure sitting on the floor  against one of the walls.

As they approached, the figure of the other Five became clearer. He was hunched on the ground, his back against the wall, knees drawn to his chest, and arms folded across the top of them. His forehead was resting on his forearms with his eyes closed. In the hand that was closest to Five and Klaus was a pistol.

Five hesitated. He recognized the gun as Reginald’s that was kept in one of the chests near the front door. It was always kept loaded inside the drawer, for emergencies, or at least that’s what Pogo had told the children. It had never occurred to their father to be concerned for the safety of small children in the home with easy access to a loaded weapon.

“Shit,” Five whispered under his breath, glancing quickly at Klaus with a worried expression.

Five and Klaus quietly made their way closer to the Five on the floor. He seemed smaller than normal, like a child, with the way he was huddled up and curling in on himself. Five worried about the gun, and he didn’t want to make any loud or sudden movements.

When the two brothers came within a few feet of the other Five, he must have sensed their presence. With his head bolting up, the pistol was immediately aimed at their heads. The older-looking Five kept his finger on the trigger, his eyes wide and manic. Five and Klaus both froze in place and when the other Five recognized them, his eyes clouded with confusion.

He kept the gun aimed at them, but he had moved his finger off the trigger. “What are you doing here?” he hissed, trying to keep his voice down.

“Stopping you from making a big mistake,” Five whispered. “Get up off the floor and let’s go.”

His other self shook his head slowly and then looked in the direction of the front door. “He needs to be stopped. So he can’t hurt anyone anymore.”

Five swallowed. He tried to imagine himself doing this exact same thing if their past paths hadn’t deviated so drastically from one another. But Five had worked so hard for so long to get back to his family that he had a hard time imagining abandoning them in order to exact revenge on their father. But yet, that was him on the floor looking deranged and pointing a gun at him and Klaus, so it must be what he would have done.

“Five, listen…” Klaus started. “I know how you feel. Believe me, if anyone has envisioned blasting a bullet through dear old Dad’s monocle, it’s me. But after a while…it just doesn’t matter anymore.”

“He’s right,” Five said. “I wish I could change so many things from my past, but we just can’t. What has happened has happened. You can kill Reggie, but it’s not going to make you feel any better.”

The other Five laughed. “I’m quite certain I would feel loads better knowing that shit head isn’t going to be out there, torturing other kids, and ruining their lives.”

Five looked incredulous at that statement. “Ruining their lives? Your life was anything but ruined, you absolute shit-for-brains! Do you realize what you have? What most people would do to have your life? What I would do?”

His other self didn’t say anything, but he lowered the gun. His eyes remained dark and angry and he swallowed hard, looking away from the other two.

“From the looks of it, I think you already know that, don’t you?” Klaus asked softly. “Because if you were going to go through with it, you wouldn’t be sitting here looking all sad and pathetic.”

The other Five glared up at Klaus. “Maybe I hesitated, that’s true. But there’s still time.”

Five looked up and shook his head before looking back down at his other self. “Fuck…that’s the thing! There’s always time! We have infinite time at our disposal; we always have. But nothing we do is going to change what happened to us.”

“I don’t care,” the other Five snarled.

Five sighed. “Alright, how about this? What if killing Reginald right now, today, alters the world? We know the butterfly effect can do some crazy ass things, so let’s say you blow him away today and you feel better about yourself. But then you return home to find out your wife isn’t your wife and your kids never existed. What then?”

His other self looked away again, gripping and re-gripping the pistol in his hand nervously. “I don’t know.”

“But it’s entirely possible and you know it. That’s why you’re sitting here in the dark instead of doing what you set out to do.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “What do you think Marie would say about you being here? Do you think she’d be proud to hear you killed him?”

“Don’t talk about my wife! You know nothing about her…or me!”

“You’re right, I don’t know her. But I do know she’s at home in tears because she thinks you left her and your kids when the world is ending. And as for me not knowing you? I know you all too well, unfortunately. I know the way your mind works and how you operate. I know how every little thing that you have screwed up in your life eats at you until you feel like you want to crawl out of your skin. Why do you think I’m a fall down drunk half the time? For fun? No, because I want to forget every shitty thing that’s ever happened to me. I want to erase it from my mind. But all I’ve managed to do is alienate my family and become a cynical, jaded old man.”

“That’s all true,” Klaus pointed out, helpfully.

After an identical annoyed look at Klaus, both Fives faced each other again. “But he has tortured so many of us over so many timelines. He needs to be stopped,” the other Five said without as much conviction behind his words as before.

Five shook his head. “No, he doesn’t. Reginald will always be Reginald no matter what. You can destroy this one and another one will pop up again somewhere else. That’s just how it works.” He took another step closer to his other self. “Remember your first kill for the Academy? When we were eleven?”

The other Five nodded slowly. “Yeah…I remember. Snapped that guy’s neck.”

“And we had nightmares about him for weeks.”

“Yeah, and then we killed a few more, and it wasn’t as bad. What’s your point?”

“After you left the Academy, you’ve never had to kill again. And that’s because no one was forcing you into it for your own survival.” Five let out a long exhale and raked his hand through his hair. “You don’t want to do this. Because once you start killing again, you’re going to be that same, messed up eleven year-old kid again. That part never goes away, no matter how many lives you take. So, do yourself a favor. Be grateful for once in your goddamn life and go home. Go home to your family and your house, your parents that loved you, your career that you’re proud of. Don’t waste it all because of one asshole in the world that called himself our father at one point in our lives. Don’t let him define who you are.”

Neither Five said anything for a moment, and then Klaus tapped Five on the shoulder and whispered nervously to him, “I think we need to go. Listen.”

The sound of footsteps and voices started to get closer to the hallway they had been hiding in. They could make out the familiar sound of Ben’s voice and then the ominous caw of a crow.

“Shit,” Five mumbled before holding out his hand to his other self. “Come on, fuck wad, if you’re coming, we have to go. Now!”

After a few more tense seconds of the voices and bird noises growing closer, and Klaus becoming visibly agitated, the other Five grabbed Five’s hand and let him pull him off the ground. Klaus clasped onto his brother’s shoulder and the three of them were gone in a popping flash of light.

@kaybreezy3000 @lunalovesangst

[galadrieljones]

Happy SatFriday, or DADWC day :) I propose... Haunted Forest, folded letter, and exhausted

Thank you for the prompt!! This is another addition to my post-Trespasser/pre-Veilguard stories for Sene Lavellan. Solas is getting closer, every day. Finally, she encounters him in the Fade...

Solavellan ❤️ 1500 words ❤️ Mature

MASTERPOST

Incredulous

Sene tip-toed past the river bank, which was frozen into a crust. She wore winter furs. She had not hunted them herself. In fact, they had been gifts from Dorian. Tall, white arctic bears. He'd commissioned them himself and sent them as a gift via courier. To My Redheaded Friend, he'd written on a piece of heavy parchment. These furs were crafted by the finest trapper in all of Tevinter. I have a feeling they will go splendidly with your magnificent hair. May they keep you warm until next I see you. Which had better be soon. I'm very bored. Yours, Dorian.

It was cold, a dead season in the Frostbacks, and she was just outside of Haven, had hiked up the mountain over the past two days. Why had she come here? She didn't know. She just felt like it. She set up camp near the old gates, in the barracks where Thom Rainier had used to sleep. She lit a fire in the hearth, and it was enough to warm her. There were woods nearby, which had overgrown in the Inquisition's absence with coniferous trees, monsters that could blot out the sky. It was where she later planned to hunt her supper, but not now. For now, she was exhausted.

She had come back to Haven twice before, once with Abelas, right at the beginning of their love, when he was curious, and he wanted relics of her old life without him, and once with Ameridan, who had been simply bored, and who she hadn't seen now in more than four months. Their last dalliance had been at the Winter Palace. Along with the Commander and Josephine with Thom, hey had attended a ball there at the behest of Empress Celene who found their coupling curious. They boarded together in a great room at the corner of the castle on a high floor, and they enjoyed the view as well as the wine, one another's company, and they fucked merrily as they had many times over the years prior. On again, off again. When they said goodbye, something about it felt definitive this time. He was headed to the Anderfels. What's there? she had asked him. He had kissed her, charming and silver, and he said, I don't know, lethal'lan. Much hardship, I'm sure. And they smiled.

She could have asked to go with him. He would have taken her, but he hadn't asked, and it wasn't what she wanted to do anyway. So instead, she went home to her clan's farm in the Free Marches. She stayed there for two months, helping her father organize the archives and helping her her mother bottle the wine, and then she went back to Skyhold to visit with Sera and Dagna, and to take care of some business with the Inquisition. Now she was alone, here in Haven, thinking about the past. She still loved this place. She warmed her hands to the fire and drank some brandy from a leather flask. She thought quite a bit about Ameridan, and how she could have loved him. It was a nice fantasy, and she missed him a little, but Ameridan was very far gone in some ways. Even beyond the Anderfels. No matter how they carried on, he seemed to have no intention of falling in love with her or anyone else. His heart was still stitched to Telana's, across centuries. Sene didn't blame him. She understood him. In this way, she knew it would never work.

A little while later after the sun went down over the mountain, Sene went outside to go hunting in the woods. The snow was crunchy. She made a habit of stepping into animal tracks and depressions left by logs and other things. It dampened her footsteps. She made quick work of a wild turkey, which took her no more than twenty minutes to track and to shoot. She'd eat what she could and cure the rest. With the bird tied off at the feet, hanging over her shoulder, she began to head homeward. She could hear the call of the owl and as the moon rose, the howling of one solemn wolf, very nearby. She stopped, standing perfectly still on the trail. She set down the turkey and took her bow off her back and then she nocked a single arrow. There was a cold wind, and with it the sounds of haunted whispers, which raised the hairs on the back of her neck, and suddenly, she knew she wasn't alone. She spun around with her arrow aimed high, right at the throat.

It was Solas.

She dropped the bow immediately. He was just standing there, wearing simple garments. A dark jacket with a high collar, and he had his hands in his pockets. He watched her, pensive and very concerned. He looked so good. She nearly dropped to her knees. But she didn't. She looked around instead, at the pines and the snow, hearing the animal sounds.

"Are you real?" she said to him. "Or is this a dream?"

"It is a dream," said Solas.

"It feels so real."

"I am near," he said. "That is why."

"You're near?" she said. "Where are you?"

"Don't worry about it, Sene."

"Why not?"

"Soon, it will be time. But not yet."

"Thom gave me your letter," she said. She pulled the folded piece of parchment from the satchel at her hip. She showed it to him. "In the Hinterlands, one month ago. You sent it from Tevinter?"

"I am grateful to Thom," said Solas. "I felt you here, at Haven. I wanted to see you. I don't know what you've heard, about the ritual, and Tevinter."

"In the letter, you said you still love me. Is that true?"

Solas hardened his jaw. He still did not remove his hands from his pockets. "It is always true."

She took a step closer to him. "It feels different now. I can sense it, too. How close."

"If this could be over," he said, "and if I came back—"

"I am not who I used to be," she interrupted. The snow began to fall. Little snowflakes clinging to his jacket, his broad shoulders. She was close enough to touch him, but she didn't.

"I know that," he said. "I know everything, vhenan."

"Everything?" she said. This made her nervous. She didn't know why. It wasn't like her. They'd met in the Fade before, many times since he'd gone. At first, she wanted to kill him, but over time, that changed. As she changed. She should have known. "What do you know."

He took a deep breath and looked down at his boots. He just looked like a man there. He didn't look like a god. "I know about Abelas," he said. "And Ameridan. When I learned Ameridan was alive, I was shocked, naturally. I had heard of your valor in the Frostback Basin. You and Abelas. I had to see the man for myself, so I went in the Fade. I saw him at a tavern. And with him, I saw you. Laughing, with your great big hair. Imagine my surprise." He smiled, in earnest.

She didn't feel embarrassed, but she did feel guilty. She knew this was irrational. "Why didn't you say anything? I had seen you in Fade."

"It didn't matter. It's your life, not mine. I couldn't give you what you needed."

"I wasn't trying to hurt you," she said. "It was never about you, with either of them. I just wanted to feel like a person."

"It's been ten years, vhenan," he said, as if hanging on for his dear life. "I have no claim over you anymore."

"I hated you for so long," said Sene.

"I remember."

"Abelas felt the brunt of that. Ameridan, in some ways, he is so much like me. He's helped me figure out the truth."

"What is the truth?"

"That I still love you," she said, holding out the letter to him. He took it, like he was compelled to. Their hands did not touch.

"You do?"

"I can't stop. It is my destiny. For this, Ameridan and I can never be together, at least not seriously. He loves a dead dreamer, same as me."

"I am not dead, vhenan."

"You might as well be," she said, shaking her head. She felt cold and filled with her regular and ongoing winter exhaustion without him. "You are not here. We meet only in dreams. You might as well be a ghost."

Now, he took his hands out of his pockets. He was wearing dark gloves, which he removed and dropped to the earth. Then he took one step closer, and he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "I have not come back, because I live in fear that you will not see me. I left you. I left us both behind that day. When I saw you again, years later, and you learned the truth, it was so...fraught. We have never discussed it."

"That is the past," she said. "I know who you are."

"I used to have a reason, Sene, but now that reason is...just gone. There is still much to be done, but I no longer need to be alone. It has been so long. I thought perhaps you had moved on. I know it sounds cliche, but I just wanted you to be happy."

"I am," she said. "I'm fine. I am not like other people, Solas, but I am not alone. I have friends, and it's taken me many years, but I'm fine. I don't know what else to say."

"You are not in love with Ameridan?"

"No," said Sene. "Though I thought about it."

He smirked, perhaps stunned. "You thought about it?"

"What it might be like, yes. I even wanted it, at one point. I believe it's over now, but we were on and off for many years."

She felt a shaking in her heart. He was still touching her neck, right where it met her jaw. He seemed to be studying the exact same spot of her skin. She wanted badly to defy him, but what was the point?

"It feels like you're here," she said. They could see their breath. "Are you sure you're not here?"

He kissed her, calmly. It seemed to last forever, like the first time. The same place. But it was much less cold then, and now, they were older. When they parted, she became a puddle in the frozen earth.

"Solas—"

"When you awaken," said Solas, "it will not be long. Vhenan." He smiled wearily and snapped his fingers once.

She woke up in the barracks, which she had never left. She had curled into her furs beside the lit hearth and fallen asleep. Now, she looked down at her freckled right arm and her strange left arm, which still itched from time to time, and still glowed with the old restorative magics wrought by Dorian and Dagna. She touched the place on her neck that Solas had touched and she touched her fingers to her lips. She got to her feet. She went outside where it was freezing, not wearing her furs, wearing only her cotton under things, and she gazed up at the moon, which was full as an eye, and then into the mouth of the haunted woods. She was incredulous.

"What the fuck," she whispered.

@dadrunkwriting

[meganlpie]

Announcement!

So, as I posted a few months ago, my old laptop decided to poop the bed as far as writing goes. I have been trying to recover all the fics that I had started and lost. Unfortunately I was not able to recover all of them and I do not have the emotional capacity to restart all the ones after all the work I put in.

Below the cut is the list of requests that I was able to recover. If you don't see your request, I'm afraid it is lost and I am so, so, so, sorry! If your request is listed, you can still feel free to take it to another writer if you wish!

Recovered requests:

*What’s Your Poison?: Hello, I saw that requests are open and wanted to ask if you would be willing to write something for Gabriel from Supernatural. Something were you always see him eat sweets amd just can’t help but wonder if there is a treat he loves and something he absolutely hates, which leads up to getting him to just try sooo many different sweet treats. Maybe him finding one that he absolutely hates and just teasing at the end. Hope this makes sense! If you don’t feel like writing it, it’s no problem. Thank you anyways and have a good day! from curious-trickster

*Battle Scars: Hi! I hope you’re doing alright. May I request a Beorn x Human!Reader who accompanies Thorin on his quest and Beorn takes a liking to them. Possibly with some angst during the Battle of the Five Armies and maybe a glimpse of life after the war? Thank you! AND May I request a Beorn x reader fic? Beorn saves the reader from Orcs or they’re part of the company and he’s intrigued by them, even suggesting they could stay. They meet again during the battle (imagine the angst). After the battle they consider visiting his cottage and after some a couple of days decide to stay with Beorn. Thank you very much 😊 by chaostwinsofdestruction

*I Feel Safe With You: May I request an Aragorn x reader (platonic) fic? I was thinking he took her under his wing for a while as Strider and they got separated and she was taken from him. She escapes but doesn’t know how to find him. She’s on her own for a while then as she’s wandering the forest alone some men come and attack her. She gets knocked out or wounded then Aragorn shows up and saves her. He’s been tracking her the whole time. When she comes too or the danger is gone they have a sweet reunion and she finally feels safe again. As always feel free to tweak it or take it where ever you’d like. by iwillbeinmynest

*I Can’t Marry You: Do you think I could request one where the reader is engaged to Boromir but she and Faramir are in love? Denethor doesn’t care and expects Boromir to marry her. Angsty with whatever ending you choose?

*A Fevered Proposal: Hi meg!! I saw your requests are open and here I am again!! If you could, could you please write a post Azkaban Sirius (exonerated sirius, idk how but it happens ok!) Taking care of a fever delirious reader, who in the height of her delirium asks sirius to marry her. He says something along the lines of “darling, we’ve talked about this, I wouldnt make a good husband” to which she replies with “you already have, if just like it on official paper” then she goes off the ramble some nonsense but it leaves sirius thinking. That yeah they are committed to eachother in every sense of the word and he has often seen the look of longing she gets when she sees Molly and Arthur together being all wifey and husbandy. So once shes sleeping soundly, he pops out for a bit, buys a ring and keeps it in his pocket so that as soon as her fever breaks he: (A) hands it to her so that she can propose to him proper Or (B) proposes to her I’ll leave the ending up to you!! Thanks in advance meg and hope you’ve been well!! by gollyderek

*What We Have: Did I read that right? You’re writing for Hogwarts Legacy characters? If that’s the case, may I request either a Professor Sharp x reader(f) where reader is the new professor taking over Professor Fig’s class and the two hit it off, but it’s like sunshine and grump trope mixed with a little “I like you, but don’t want to ruin what we’ve got going on” trope?

**How Wrong You Are: OR a fic where, after the events of the game, reader(f!MC) is the center of gossip like is she dating someone and her besties are curious?(continued) and she is dating someone, but they’ve been enjoying the secret. Like MC gets a kick out of how wrong people can be. I’ll leave it to you to who she’s dating, but I was thinking either Sebastion, Ominis, Gareth, or(and please don’t hate me) Leander. Whichever request interests or inspires you more. Thank you!!

Again, I am so very sorry I've lost so many requests, but rest assured I am working on the ones I was able to save. Thank you for your patience and understanding! Lots of love!

-Meg

[byrdtrollsunoreversearchive]

Fundraiser adopts update!!

A lot of you probably aren't privy to all thats gone behind the scenes! So I thought I'd throw together a little update! This is the progress we've had so far <3 If you want or need your name taken of this list for whatever reason, because you can't complete the adopt, reach out to me! And I can do it no problem. This is just a very vague outline I made off conversations had in dms and several servers, and it's possible I misinterpreted some peoples intent, or even that I missed someone, and please reach out to me if that is the case.

Once again, if the workload is feeling particularly heavy, I can always collab with you! I'm willing to do lineart or coloring on any of these <3

without further ado (completed adopts striked out), the list-

Pomegranate (howl)

Pomegranate(wren lineart)(robin coloring)

Apricot(howl)

Apricot(cadaver lineart)(robin coloring)

Mango(jonah)

Mango(robin lineart)(ko coloring)

Grapes(moona)

Grapes(robin lineart)(sunne coloring)

Watermelon(robin lineart)(gold coloring)

Watermelon(mik)

Watermelon hare

Date(roe)

Date(liam lineart)(robin coloring)

Olives(moona)

Olives (mik)

Olive hare

Oranges(newt)

Oranges(contrast lineart)(robin coloring)

Eggplants(jonah)

Loquat(kurt)

A lot of people have had different life circumstances come up, so it may be a bit longer. Also, to all artists, take as much time as you need!

There are also a couple things I wanted to discuss with the artists, the first being pricing! We should probably set a minimum donation, and I'd love to find a price that everyone agrees on for the amount of work they put in. And this is the easiest way I could think of to reach out to everyone at once.

and secondly, since the process is probably still going to take a bit to coordinate, just because of it's scale, I was thinking of opening up preclaims! for the adopts that have already been finished/are in progress. They would be first come first serve <3 I would put in another poll, but tumblr only allows one per post, so I guess I'd just ask if anyone has any objections to this!! If an agreement can't be come too, we could absolutely do it on an artist by artist basis.

Anyways, thank you once again to everyone who's offered their talent for this massive project! It really means the world to me to be able to do something so tangible for Gaza and Armenia. I never in my life expected this many people to offer to help <3 so thank you all, truly, for your ongoing support of this project.

[koskela-knights]

I’m trying to make my own AW2 playlist of chapter ending songs—do you have any recommendations? Feel like we’re similarly obsessed with the spiral…

Thnx for your question! And well yeah I might be a bit obsessed with the spiral/loops and its endless possibilities & scenarios that could've been 👀

Besides the official ending songs the game already provides, there are some other songs that give me general AW/AW2 vibes or specific feels for certain characters! I've been pondering about songs to share for a while, so this is a great opportunity! Thnx again for the ask!

Also feel free to share your own songs in my inbox if you feel like it :D

It's gonna be a long post so buckle up 😅

This is the moment to share my love for Lord Huron, specifically their Strange Trails album but also Vide Noir one.

Strange Trails is, to me, an album about being lost and cursed and it's about love. Honestly, I don't think The Night We Met is a good representative about the entire album.

Meet Me In The Woods

This entire song just screams Alan Wake to me.

I took a little journey to the unknown, And I come back changed. I can feel it in my bones. I fucked with forces that our eyes can't see. Now the darkness got a hold on me.

(...)

How long, baby, have I been away? Oh, it feels like ages though you say it's only days. There ain't language for the things I've seen. And the truth is stranger than my own worst dreams.

(...)

I have seen what the darkness does. Said goodbye to who I was. I ain't never been away so long. Don't look back them days are gone. Follow me into the endless night. I can bring your fears to life. Show me yours and I'll show you mine. Meet me in the woods tonight.

Like, how can you read those lyrics and not think about our boy Alan.

2. Way Out There

Drifting in a land time forgot If you think that I've changed, you know me not I belong bodily to the earth I'm just wearing old bones from those that came first I been unraveling since my birth

Those lyrics and partially the song in general remind me of Alan in the Dark Place trying to escape. How many loops has he been through? (Thus in this context, kind of wearing 'old bones from those who came first, aka older iterations of Alan himself) Also, the theremin they use is so fitting and it's an instrument often used in horror movies so <3

3. Vide Noir (both album itself & song)

Where can you go when it’s all in your head? These are the last words that I ever said Where can you go when it’s all in your head? These are the last words that I ever said

Tbh, this album also gives off major Control vibes with its themes and songs about the Astral plane & the black void. Many other songs on the album talk about the main character getting lost and drifting in-between time/space and living/dying

4. War by Poets of the Fall

You might be familiar with the song already and its music video 👀

I like how all the Poets were involved in the video as Taken (have you seen BTS shots of Olli with a fake beard?!!) Anyways, the song makes me think of how Alan has to remember that there are people out there who want to help him. That there are people out there fighting against the Darkness, even if he is mainly unaware and might even feel he doesn't deserve external help. It also reflects Alice being Alan's bright light in the darkness, and the reason he wants to keep fighting to get back to her.

In a similar vein, Lust For Life (also PoTF haha) this song could also be seen through an Alan/Alice lens, the shared shoebox mechanic and Alice trying to help/guide Alan back to the real world.

What is lost may be found Safe and sound

5. Hello Cabaret by PoTF

Now this song is maybe one of my faves of the Ghostlight album. Relistening to my fave lyrics of the song, it reminds me of the Koskelas and Ilmo specifically.

For when you come calling Dancing on my grave For all my choices made Judging me for how I played The hand you dealt me Stains the blood that flows

(...)

Of all I once did love but lost Nothing comes without a cost The wise fool said that's just the way it goes

(...)

Most will never comprehend Till' they're in the very predicament

To me, Ilmo at the end of the game is heartbroken and dead inside now that his other/better half is gone. The 'you' in question here might as well be the player or Scratch/Alan and he feels judged by the narrative of his previous actions. He's made decisions and sacrifices and used the Cult as a palpable 'villain' for the greater good. Something many probably didn't/wouldn't understand unless they were in his shoes.

6. Chasing Echoes by PoTF

It's a fun coincidence that in AW2 you have literal Echoes to chase huh.

Is this a role or disguise seeking mercy in creation? Just another device or truly a time when we will rise? Oh one and all, to the occasion And bridge the gap to see the other side?

The more on-the-nose/literal meaning aside, I think this song can be read as another one about Alan trying to escape the DP/spiral upwards toward ascension. Again, there's a 'you' in this song that could be interpreted as Alice who is a light inside Alan's darkness.

7. Brother by Lord Huron

How long have I known you, brother? Hundreds of lives, thousands of years How many miles have we wandered Under the sky, chasing our fear? Considering the spiral and the historical background of the Koskelas and their (indirect) ties to the Huotaris, they might as well known each other/been brothers for longer than what we see in-game. Some kind of trouble is coming Don't know when, don't know what I will stand by you, brother 'Til the daylight comes or I'm dead and gone

(...)

I know we can't stop what's coming But I will try, oh how I'll try Will you fight with me, brother One last time, one last fight

We know Ilmo got visited by the Dark Presence and has had nightmares about killing Jaakko. Luckily, he rose above that (as far as we know) but I think the dread and fear of losing Jaakko keeps lingering just underneath the surface. Personally, I enjoy the thought of people sometimes remembering the previous loop/spiral and that those affected/remembering would try anything to keep the loop from repeating.

8. You Belong To Me by Cat Pierce

If you're a fan of Alan/Scratch, this song has that obsessive/possessive vibe to it that seems to be a dialogue/mix between them.

I've heard allegations 'bout your reputation I'll show you my shadows if you show yours Let's get it right dear, give a good fight dear We'll keep it all up behind closed doors

(...)

I must confess to you, I want to possess you Feels like we're dreaming, we're tripping and reeling Just say that you belong to me I could get lost in the feelings we're feeling Just say that you belong to me

[beardedmrbean]

Thank you for liking my collection, perhaps other people will too

But I saw that post about how funimation is shutting down and it’s capitalism fault…but bitch it’s streaming service exclusively for ANIME. A huge niche

Also to the reason why, their both are shitshows. But Sony owns funimation and bought crunchyroll, two anime streaming services

Now crunchyroll(which is a shitshow too) got popular

Like been to your local Walmart?

There a section at Walmart dvd area dedicated to crunchyroll in mine

So while this sucks (especially it seems that Sony isn’t going to let people transition their Funi stuff to crunchyroll) it not shocking

Now their a mess, let compare this to Disney handling of Disney plus and Hulu

Now yes Disney plus app is have a hub for Hulu now. Which thank you, because I have the Disney plus bundle (I sharing it with other people. SHIT THE MOUSE IS COMING FOR ME!) but it sure as hell more convenient for me to use the Hulu hub than go out to another app to watch Hulu content

Though it FUCKING funny how my continue watching can have Disney plus alongside with seienin anime

But anyways, I can see why Sony did that because, both streaming services are niches and crunchyroll is just bigger

But I’m 23, any anime consumption…

Bitch back in the day most westerners anime fans had to watch cable TVs blocks like Toonami. Like my tv consumption were in flux. I didn’t have cable all the time and watch a lot of dvds especially in road trips. A lot of my anime consumption started by watch adult swim aired anime. Or if my family a little bit of money. Cable box where I watch Digimon on Disney old block Jetix

Actually the photo I sent you will probably help your other anime fans on how I consume anime

But anime streaming services…are niche af. Yes anime went mainstream in the west, but they can easily be gone instantly. Actually one of my favorite Drifters was taken off it streaming services. But I was able to get the blu ray

Sorry for the essay…I’m just SHOCKED on how bad certain people over reliance of streaming services is because I still really the twilight years of renting (grew up near a family video)

Thank you for liking my collection, perhaps other people will too

ya like I said I recognized the obvious ones, never really did much with anime.

As for all the services, it's a really weird thought that's come into my head watching all of this.

Most folks out in tumblr land probably won't remember when the "Bell System" was broken up.

The phone system in the US was a legal monopoly, until it wasn't a legal monopoly and the Fed broke it up into regional things and also opened things up to competition for a bit there were hundreds of different phone companies popping up offering the best price on local or long distance and all that good stuff.

Then they started to get absorbed by the bigger ones, still no return to the monopoly since that's not allowed but went from on choice to oddles of choices back down to just a few choices none of which were terrible.

Cellphones did that too when they showed up, was never a monopoly but there were tons of regional outfits selling service, that all got slowly bought up by larger and larger companies.

Cable and satellite TV as well as internet too.

I think we may be seeing that with streaming services, not really any tiny fly by night groups doing streaming services but there's only so many that can be out there before they stop being profitable, especially the niche ones.

Which I think that merger and the price hike that is coming with it is a thing that was basically inevitable, the price hike will reverse if history is any indicator, at leas so long as people remain pissed about it and don't sub.

That or they'll sell packages so you can customize what you want.

Either way I'm still with you on the need to rely less on streaming services, I feel the same way about the cloud, which I refuse to use, I know how to work around all that if the need arises.

[belltrigger]

Hello again ! It is I, the anonymous headcanon guy !

(I'd like to thank you for your kind words from the last time, first. I am still trying to figure out how tumblr works, but hopfully i'll be able to not be anonymous anymore !)

I came up with another headcanon, i hope you won't mind too much about me sharing it with you !

I see often with the twins that Emmet, the little brother, is a little shit and irresponsible, whereas Ingo is the epitome of the Dad Friend(tm).

I don't think it should go that way. Twins are differents than normal siblings. First, they are born together, so the normal(tm) sibling behavior don't stick to them (it also bother me a little to see Emmet getting the full little brother instinct whereas Ingo only get the Dad Friend one. Older siblings often bullies their younger siblings, but we don't see that hmm ? Anyway-)

I think their personality towards each other should be more equal, like both goofy and responsible.

Also, and this one is a little more personal, i heard that siblings (often seen with twins) have some sort of pack thing going on, like one being the leader and the other following. It may seems like, since Emmet is the LB(tm), he should follow and Ingo should lead, but it doesn't feel right to me (i often see that Ingo will lead in discussions, or do some things like going to someone or things like that. I know that Emmet is heavily autism coded, but Ingo has been portrayed as well, and I don't see why, just because he is less heavily portrayed he should carry the "leader" role. It feels like, since he is more normal, he can function. I find that bad, for lack of better words)

I think they should both lead, as they share a job with the same responsibilities, and both are good trainers with diverses pokemons (meaning one didn't dictate how both of their teams should look like, they both chose).

Anyway, to make it short, i think that both of them should be equal, and not simply little and big brothers (especially for twins, this is kind of a stupid thing. I mean, I get the little and big brother jokes, but in all seriousness, it shouldn't matters.)

Sorry for the long, long post but it really is something that i wanted to share, as it is something that's very close to me.

I hope you found it interesting !

Hello AHG! ヾ(•ω•`)o I hope you are doing well! Tumblr can be a little bit different from other sites, this is true! Take your time, lurk where you'd like, and if you ever feel comfortable (or capable!) of coming off Anon, I'd love for you to let me know!

And yeah!! Send me your head-canons, even once you figure out how tumblr works! (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ Or post them and let me know where you're doing it so that I can follow you! I love reading head-canons! It's cool to hear people explain why they have them and the twins are SO open to interpretation! (As a preamble to your head-canon, so much is fanon and sometimes it can be quite frustrating that a certain thing has taken hold.)

I do think official media with them, despite having quite a few variations (Anime Submas, Manga/Special Submas, Original Game Submas, Masters Submas are the big ones), is a bit more close to how you are thinking about it. They're both shown as responsible in certain ways, and goofy in others.

In fact, fanart on the Japanese side of things often interprets Anime Emmet as the responsible one. The only problem with that is the anime is also technically the source of your woes, as I am pretty certain that is where people found out that Ingo being the older twin is 'canon.' If you look at content older than that, you'll find it was pretty even on who was treated as the younger brother and/or it not mattering as much.

Personally, I have gone back and forth for how I like to portray them in my stories. Like you, I love them being equal, them reveling in the idea of their twinship, and being each other's biggest rivals.

Alas, I think we can "blame" Pokemon Legends Arceus for people treating Ingo like "the dad friend" in current fanon. Between people seeing him anywhere between a protective uncle to outright finding him attractive and appealing as a romantic partner, Ingo has become "an adult to trust" to many people. As I am older than the twins' accepted fanon age, I really and truly don't have any Uncle or Dad feelings towards him, so perhaps that's why I treat him more like a brother than anything.

Something I do like to note is the fact that Ingo (in the Japanese version of the anime) uses 'kyoudai (siblings)' to refer to them, and not 'futago(twins).' However, Emmet (also in the Japanese version of the anime) calls Ingo "Nii-san(older brother)." So, clearly the anime is hung up on creating older brother/younger brother dynamics between them, and despite people not liking the design choices of Ingo (not having the :< expression), it is a pretty sizable chunk of characterization and screen time. It's possible that people are leaning into that for their fanon.

I can't speak to the autism thing as I am not diagnosed with austim myself, but what I can say is that English fanon for how they speak is somewhat different from the Japanese tone of their speech is. It's clearly the work of localization, because honestly the way Emmet and Ingo talk is extremely heavily loaded with stuff that doesn't translate easily. None of this negates people identifying with the twins, assigning stim or tics to them, or any head-canons revolving around it. I just think there's fascinating tone changes between each version!

For example! English fanon says that Emmet speaks very stilted, which has been translated as him possibly scripting, not liking to talk, having anxiety, etc. And while it is true that Emmet speaks in short sentences, he also talks in childish, improper, and 'rude' ways in the Japanese version. This is counter-balance to Ingo who speaks in an incredibley archaic, old-man style, absolutely stuffed with politeness. (And Ingo's method of speech is entirely why I suspect *he* was the twin thrown into Hisui, if they only picked one.)

Interestingly, their method of talking about themselves in Masters is also fascinating! Everyone knows that Emmet says "I am Emmet." (I feel his 'Boku Kudari' in Japanese is cuter, but I am biased, I think). But he *also* talks like he's a dude who works at the Subway with his brother, although he really appreciates his position and feels so much honor and respect for it. Ingo, however, speaks like he is *intrinsically* part of the Subway, as though he is a fixture there and not a guy who puts on a uniform he greatly respects. The Subway is something bigger than him, and he is a part of it; Emmet on the other hand is himself and the Subway is part of *him.*

The above is just my interepretation of their speech patterns and how they carry themselves because honestly *there is just so much space to fill.*

This got SUPER BRAVO long, so-! Oops! But I do find your headcanons verrrrry interesting! When I am done working on my commission, perhaps I will think about writing a fic where they are equals! I would like to think some of my stories would suit your needs, but perhaps I need to make more! Eheh

Thank you so so much for your ask!! o(*°▽°*)o

[iloveasunflower]

Roland's Tour Diary: 7th May

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text version:

Saturday, May 7, 2005

Well, another intense period is finally over for TFF, I can stop obsessing about my voice and leave the calorific honey and lemon to one side for a while. I feel we left London on a high, even if some of the reviews have made out otherwise. The mind boggles as to how people read body language – Curt and I are getting on famously – if we weren’t, you’d soon hear about it and I could indulge in some fantastic bitching during this tour diary – but no – live, we are a band and have no desire to ‘Wham’ it up with fake buddiness.

I’ve read some of the comments posted and can’t say I disagree with even the more negative ones. We were caught slightly off-guard by the lack of awareness of ELAHE in the UK, and I think Glasgow was the peak of a mutual ignorance, with us clumsily dividing the set into old and new. It wasn’t until Newcastle that we remedied the situation – and boy, what an audience! Shades of New York!

I also think we have too much of the new album in the set. Admittedly, the touring was designed to get the point across, but I do think we could make a better show, if we increased the repertoire and started to replace some of the newer songs – more upbeat tunes would work in our favor, and as we are hitting the US in the summer, it might well be time for a change. (Points taken about RATKOS – however, bear it in mind, we do three songs from ‘Big Chair’ – ‘Listen’ would be impossible and ‘The Working Hour’ requires a saxophone – any offers? ‘I Believe’ – maybe. )

Cardiff was as close to a home gig as we could get, with a couple of busloads crossing the Severn Bridge from Bath and Bristol. The atmosphere was very casual and relaxed, and the gathering in the green room, after the show, did resemble a wedding. One great thing about being a ‘seasoned professional’ is you learn to take things like playing in front of friends, family and neighbors in your stride – you just imagine you’re throwing a big party!

Points also taken about the dance remixes that are accompanying the UK single releases, although I would say I have a fondness for the ‘Call Me Mellow’ ones. I guess like Tony Blair it’s time to listen to the electorate and start working on some obscure beauty in the form of B-sides, that would titillate the fans, and keep us interested. I’m also touched by some of your comments about RATKOS – I believe that album must have sold by word of mouth, as it didn’t receive much attention at the time. Over 700,000 copies now sold (unless I’ve been misinformed – can’t be that many hardcore fans) – not bad considering.

It’s off to Paris on Sunday for more delightful press and promotion – things, however, have gone our way there with the CTTH video getting a nice bit of airtime. As you are probably aware, we are playing a show in the French capital on June 18 (with Moby and Garbage), and the record company has certainly filled up our days over the coming week. I can’t wait for the late, late night chat shows with some poor sod trying to translate our perverse asides!

Anyways, thanks for all the interesting posts and glad that at least some of you enjoyed our UK adventure. Now is the time to put in your requests for live songs as Big Brother will be watching very intently over the next week ;)

Roland