#Anyway I still have a reasonable amount in savings which I'm very lucky to have

[roomthirtythree]

there is a chance that I will go back to the ham job

the ham job is me running around a cold warehouse for 8-12 hours loading hams and other such products on trays and then shipping them off

not a fascinating job BUT my visa costs money and guess what

Best way to hatch my pokemon go eggs...

[superherotiger]

YO bestie gonna require you to ramble more about those kids and parents from the outsider pov fic thanks

AHHHH BESTIE YOU BETTER LOCK IN BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO GO FERAL-

If there's one element of the Outsider POV that owns my soul, it's the X-23 kids and everything surrounding them. Like look at this list- LOOK AT IT!

I've thought about them so much it's unhealthy 🤣

I tried to keep it as accurate to Logan (2017) as possible, using all the kids names I could find on the wiki and then added a couple extras to make it to the lucky number 23. The extras are shown with a green square and have some fun little references included! Alex is named after Riptide's actor Álex González, Theresa is Banshee's daughter in the comics, January is named after Emma Frost's actress January Jones, and I chose Ace for Gambit's kiddo because PUNS okay? I needed at least one hahah!

My memory is a little rusty but I believe the bolded names meant the parent was still alive, but that could change if I saw an opportunity to include more of the parents that never got to be.

Anyway, I'm about to ramble hard about the kids so I'll chuck it below the read more to spare some of you 🤣

Okay so straight off the bat, I wanted to explain why Laura is X-2 not X-23 she normally is. I knew from the start that I wanted Luna to be younger than Laura so that meant if Laura was X-23 and Luna was a later number, it wouldn't exactly be the X-23 program anymore. To get around this I thought the in-universe reason for it being called the X-23 program would be because they successfully cloned only 23 subjects using the limited amounts of DNA they had in store. Some DNA they had more of (hence Nature Girl having multiple clones) while others they only had small amounts to work with, which is a reason why the doctors were hesitant to get rid of Luna considering she was all that was left of Pietro (and as a result Magneto's) DNA. And that's how Luna became X-22 and Laura became X-2 (in a sort of half reference lol).

I love the idea of the older kids looking out for the younger ones. We see in the movie that they clearly had tight bonds despite their horrible treatment and I really wanted to play into that for the fic, showing how they really relied on each other to get through and were still normal kids at the heart of it all. The more I write about them though the more I wish some of them had survived because they're all so sweet and deserved so much better (yes I know I'm the one that wrote them dying, it was for the plot hush 🤣)

I’m not sure if I’ve explicitly mentioned it before but the Avalanche in this AU is based on an older version of Lance Alvers from X-Men: Evolution. As heartbreaking as it was, I loved writing Lance’s reaction to finding out that Rictor had died. I think he would’ve been so proud of his son for being such a strong leader for the other kids, and he’s very similar to Peter in that he doesn’t hesitate to consider Rictor his own child. It’s interesting because Peter and Lance are kind of parallels, with the main difference being that one of their kids survived and the other didn’t. We’ll get to see a bit more of Lance in the next chapter which I’m super hyped for!!

I touched a bit on Sabretooth’s feelings towards having a clone kid in my last ramble, but Gambit is also a really interesting one too. We’ll see it briefly in the next chapter, but I imagine there’s this deep sadness in Gambit that he prefers not to think about. While Sabretooth acts abrasive and dismissive, Gambit puts on a sort of “I wouldn’t have made a good father anyway” vibe so he doesn’t have to tackle just how much the situation hurts.

I’m really excited to show Storm and Jean’s reactions to learning about their kids and how they grieve in different ways. While Jean is desperate to know as much as possible about Joey even if it’s painful, Storm can’t bear the thought of all that Delilah went through and gets angry that they were so close to saving the kids but not fast enough.

This isn’t one we’ll touch on for a long time, but holy shit FABIEN FUCKING CORTEZ having a clone is one of my favourite details. Like bro, I haven’t even written the Fabian POV yet, but I think about it all the time. I don’t want to spoil too much, but the Fabian POV takes place years before anything else that’s been posted for the series and includes an event that changes Peter and Erik’s dynamic in a detrimental way. Like ongoing trauma kind of way. Changed the course of their lives kind of way. And I just imagine Erik seeing Fabian’s name as the DNA source for Jonah and being like “What the FUCK” whereas Peter is having war flashbacks like “cool cool that’s going in the vault 😀”. If I ever did touch on this plotline, I’d want it to be an older Luna trying to learn more about the other parents of the kids and realising oh fuck there’s actually beef between their family and the Cortez’ and how she reconciles that with the memory of her beloved friend.

I would talk more about Laura and Luna, but I don’t want to spoil all the fun things I have in store for their characters!!! So thank you for letting me ramble again, it’s been a blast and my brain has been going BRRR in the best way possible!! Love you dearest!

-Superherotiger

Send me an ask about the backstory of any of my fics and I’ll ramble!! ✨

[ebonyslasher]

Spicy Alphabet: Stu Matcher

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

"Hoo man! Babe that was awesome!" *Fist bump* Stu is in awe of the sex, even if y'all have done it a million times. He either cracks jokes or has silly conversations afterward.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

For Stu, his penis. He's very proud of what he has and likes to flaunt it. He feels like he won the lottery with what he has.

For you, that ass!!! He will motorboat his face in between those luscious cheeks. It's so fast that it shakes your whole body. He loves painting your cheeks and asshole with his cum.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He has an average amount of cum and a horrible diet, so I suggest not swallowing. Which is okay! He likes cumshots the best anyway

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Stu and Billy masturbate together while watching porn. It used to be a weekly thing before Stu met you. He wants to keep that to himself, and the fact that they still do so. It went from weekly, to every few months.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Stu has had sex with a few people. He's done too many crazy sex activities to NOT know what he's doing.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

This whole picture

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Mr. Worldwide comedian. One of the only reasons why the sessions are so long is due to the laugh attacks y'all have. He takes nothing seriously.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Lucky him, his hair only grows to a certain length and just stays there. So, he doesn't have to groom.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Through his compliments and jokes is where his romance shines. He also asks if you're doing okay and comfortable.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Stu has jack off marathons every month or so. He's hunched over his computer watching his favorite pornos he has saved.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

God, your asshole tasted so good. That brown pinched cavern was now fluttering open, spasming in uncomfortable pleasure. Stu takes his wet tongue and slathers it against the sensitive skin. The tongue follows a complicated maze Stu mentally made for maximized pleasure. Saliva slushing violently, it makes you howl.

Rimming, facesitting, watersports, bdsm, drugged (high) sex.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

In the living room. So many surfaces to fuck on, and he will have you on every one of them.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

"You make me so wet, there's a wet floor sign required in the room."

"Damn, you should bounce that ass on me like I'm a trampoline!"

"Here's Johnny!!!!"

Generally, flirty and goofy banter. Offering yourself to him, especially anal or oral, is an instant yes. If you're excited to see him, it makes him ready to race you to the living room.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

No pooping or demeaning him verbally.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He loves to give and receive equally.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on how much energy he has. He may be a killer, but he's not the most athletic….

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Absolutely yes. Stu likes the thought of possibly being caught as well. He's more open to doing it at school, abandoned buildings, maybe even at the lake. Stu is down to "disappear" while hanging out with friends

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

So down to experiment. He's with whatever.

He's risky himself. He's tried to have sex using different drugs to see how it feels.

Y'all are basically Uncle Elroy and Aunt Sugar from Next Friday

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Not great. He can do 2 in one session on a good day. Anything else needs to be spread out.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Yes. You can't do the crazy stuff without the toys! All sorts of objects make their way into scenes. There's been a drill, fantasy door swing, ball and gag, etc.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Verbal teaser. Not good at physical teasing. It just feels so good when he slips inside. When your mouth is on him. When you hit him so goooood. He has to give in.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Bro is loud. Jokes flying, moaning 'oh FUCK', he did a wolf howl one time.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

"Just tap it in so it won't spill."

Stu did his best to hold his ass open, pushing his pelvic muscles to open his moist pink hole. Your shaky hands hovered over, tilting a small, glad vial carefully over it. The cocaine powder you'd bought earlier was so fine, you were afraid it would waste everywhere. Going with his suggestion, you carefully tap the powder in. Thankfully, it snowed perfectly into his opening. Three more taps and that was enough to get the night started. It was the best orgasm Stu ever had that night.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

9". Moderately thick. Basically this picture.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

High unless he's going through a rough mental spot, then it's extremely low

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He will stay up if energized and feeling silly. Otherwise, he conks out- already snoring.

[three--rings]

So today I was driving to my dnd game as I do every week, in my husband's brand new car, and someone crossed in their car right in front of me when I was going full speed. I barely had time to hit the brake before I hit him.

Let me tell you a full impact wreck at highway speeds, with all the airbags going off is an experience. Not a good one.

I stopped finally on the side of the road, having taken out a metal sign post as well, opened my door and crawled under the inflated side air bag to get out of the car, grabbing my phone on the way, my brain telling me it was Important Somehow.

I was super dazed and in shock, unable to answer questions for a minute, but I knew right away my right ankle was hurt.

Eventually police and then EMT arrived and took me to the ER. Where after being swarmed by people intent on getting me naked, after begging them not to cut off my dress that I sewed myself, I was eventually diagnosed with a broken bone in my heel.

It still took many hours of tests before they would let me go, yet they totally missed the injured ribs I definitely have.

Anyway, I'm home now and have been dealing with a truly ridiculous amount of pain and many things are very bad, but I'm alive and I only hurt my foot (and probably some ribs), which is thanks to modern cart technology.

Our new car is doubtless totaled, which sucks but also it probably saved my life or my health.

So uh, hope everyone is having better days than me. It's hard to keep in mind how lucky I am when I'm screaming in agony but uh, I guess I am. (Also for some reason I've just discovered putting my foot down on the ground helps the pain which is sus but hey.)

[danses-with-dogmeat]

how about 6, 23 and 30? :0 not sure if any of these need to be game specific, but if so then NV please ^v^

Sounds good! Thanks for the ask! 😁

And it's only a little specific lol, but I ended up kinda answering for all of them 😅

6. If you could have one creature as a companion, what would it be? 

Ohhhhh, this is so difficult 😩 the obvious answer is deathclaw, I think, and that would be a spectacular companion, don't get me wrong, but... I also really like the pseudo-dog types. I'd love to have a mutant hound, or in NV's case, a night stalker would be very cool... but also brahmin and bighorners would be interesting too 🤔 ahh, I'm too indecisive for this, they're all too good!

Really, they just need to expand to more than humanoids and Dogmeat/Rex... and robots... Ok, so they have a decent variety, but I want more aminals, dangit.

23. Which SPECIAL stat do you tend to make the highest? 

It's generally either charisma (usually in FO4's case) or intelligence, but I'd like to do a lucky character sometime in the future, since that seems very fun to explore.

30. 3 things you’d like to see in the next fallout game?

This is a great question, and already partially answered above! But I'm gonna go over it again.

First, I'd like to see a bigger commitment to character development with the companions/npcs. As much as we all complain about the writing in FO4 (and for good reason), Bethany Esda really has shown growth in the way the companions have become more individualized characters with interesting backstories from FO3-FO4. But obviously there was still a lack of development and closure for a lot of these characters, a lot of tragic backstories they have in common *cough cough dead wife *cough and an overall lack of depth and care for the female characters (Clover, Cait, Curie, Cass, Cross why do all of their names start with C? and somewhat for Piper and Veronica as well.) And I do tend to play Fallout not for the combat/gameplay as much, but more for the story and character connections and the interesting environment; so I'd call for more companion quests and unique characters that really ground you in the world and help you to form emotional connections with them, and, in turn, become more invested in the game, story, and world as a whole.

Second, this is really just a critique for FO4, but please bring back the proper elements of roleplaying! Don't give our characters a whole ass backstory that's difficult to stray from or build off of if you want to stay true to cannon with your OCs. Also, for the love of god, bring back the dialogue options that aren't just one word gists of the whole actual line. I can't tell y'all the amount of times I went back in a save for saying something wrong 😩 Like.... I wanted to be sarcastic in a funny way, not be an asshole to Nick, geeze.

And last is that one I said earlier, where it'd be interesting to have different creature companions, but also, just more variety in general with the companions. Give us more female characters, more companions from different factions (Legion, Great Khans, Fiends, The Kings, Enclave, etc.), and more characters that are canonically trans, or have a specific sexuality/romantic preference instead of blanketing everyone as bi to be available to any kind of OC (which is awesome for some, but also, I'd like to see further commitment to diversity), which also means I'd like to see different races and ethnicities depicted as well.

ANYWAY, that was pretty long-winded, and just sort of word-vomited out, but hopefully it all makes sense.

There's definitely quite a few things I would want to see changed for future games, but also, I don't want to completely drag the ones I've played, since, clearly, they've had an enormous impact on my life. But I'm a true believer that most of us who enjoy these games, yet still want to see them change, want that because of how much we care about these games and we only want to see them improve more and more.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

So I (finally!) bought a pair of really good noise cancelling headphones, and it has changed my life! It's the fanciest thing I've bought in years, so to recoup some of the cost, I’ve researched & written a little essay based on my experiences with extreme noise sensitivity.

Hypersensitivity to sound is something I’ve dealt with all of my life, but I only recently found out it's medically known a Hyperacusis. (Please note this is a separate condition from Misophonia.) If you consistently struggle to cope with noise, the info below could be helpful! I’m including a link to my ko-fi, and I will be answering questions in the notes.

(skip to the bottom to read fun facts about my tax return and/or street organs vendettas!)

DISCLAIMER: I am not a professional, this is based solely on my experiences as a patient, and on what I have read and been told by professionals. Please notify me if you have corrections or concerns about accuracy!

BACKGROUND: Sensitivity to sound is a common type of sensory issue. While anyone can experience such issues (most people, for example, might be bothered by loud music in a crowded restaurant), some people are more sensitive than others, to the point it becomes a quality-of-life aka a medical issue.

If you consistently struggle with environmental stimuli that other people aren’t bothered by (background noises, bright lights, certain textures and tastes, etc), to the point it causes daily discomfort or limits the environments you can be in, I recommend reading about Sensory Processing Disorder.

SPD and sound sensitivity are both super common in autistic folks (like me!), but allistic (non-autistic) people can experience them too. Weep, ye prisoners of mortal coil, for none are safe, nothing sacred, not in this thy most accursed tomb of human flesh!

Anyway.

SOUND SENSITIVITY or HYPERACUSIS: Noise issues are particularly difficult to navigate in a world that is increasingly...noisy. The relatively new phenomenon of constant overhead music in restaurants, grocery stores, shopping malls etc—all of this means that public spaces are increasingly inaccessible to people with auditory issues.*

As a kid, nothing quite triggered sensory overload/meltdowns for me like the constant exposure to noise I couldn’t control—the background chatter of other kids in the lunchroom, the constant noise in public spaces, being trapped in the car with the radio on.... I had so many fights with my siblings about the car radio, and who got to choose the music.**

But it’s not just loud sounds that are the problem. As an adult who lives alone and works from home***, I’m lucky enough to be able to avoid loud environments most of the time. This does wonders for my general levels of anxiety and discomfort. But even in a mostly controlled environment, I still experience problems. Because part of sound sensitivity is that even normal or quiet sounds can feel loud and intrusive. Here are some “normal” sounds that can cause me discomfort (ranging from annoyance to outright pain, depending on the day):

refrigerator/AC/ceiling lights humming

dishwasher/washing machine noises

ceiling fan making that damn ceiling fan noise

faint sounds of traffic

riding in a car

other people having a normal conversation in the background

someone talking to me in a perfectly normal inside voice

Unfortunately, even in a “controlled” environment, many triggering noises can’t be controlled. And many parts of life can’t be lived in a controlled environment. This presents...some incredibly freaking annoying problems. Luckily there are solutions!

Sorta.

There are sorta some solutions.

They are imperfect, but they help.

TREATMENT: And now I have something rather shame-faced to admit. In all the years of managing my symptoms, it never once occurred to me to see a hearing specialist for my issues with sound. I wasn’t even aware that treatment options exist, because none of my other doctors mentioned it. Instead, I’ve spent years finding my own coping mechanisms and tools, with help from therapists and psychiatrists, but without ever consulting an audiologist/ENT. It was only while researching this post that I found out that was even an option, holy shit.

So it turns out I am going to be making an appointment with my local ENT practice. shit.

Apparently treatment options include sound/acoustic therapy, systematic desensitization/exposure therapy, cognitive behavior therapy, sound machines, and other options that I had no idea even existed, goddammit.

MANAGEMENT: In the meantime, here are my current coping mechanisms. I’ve relied rather heavily on hearing protection, which is very useful when used in moderation. Unfortunately, it can cause its own problems: it’s important not to overuse hearing protection, because in the long-term this can increase your sensitivity. So again: a useful tool, but be careful not to overdo it.

With that in mind, here are some of the coping strategies I’ve used over the last decade to manage my symptoms. This is not a perfect system and you should contact your local ENT clinic for better, long-term solutions, but in the meantime here are some tips I use to just get myself through the damn day:

Regularly spending time in a quiet controlled environment, to allow my nervous system to decompress.

Wearing earplugs, (I use two different grade, depending on the level of noise prevention I need), and always carrying an extra pair in case I need them unexpectedly. I bought a 50 pack for $7 and put spares in all my bags and jacket pockets.

(I mostly use Mack’s Ultra Soft, but there are so many types and materials and brands, including foam, silicone, wax, custom moldable etc. Even if you have trouble wearing things in your ears, you might be able to find something comfortable.)

Similarly: hearing protection earmuffs, the kind used in gun ranges and on construction sites. I bought mine online for $10. they look like normal wireless headphones, so I've never gotten comments when wearing mine in public (other than “cool heaphones” bc i added skull glitter stickers).

Sometimes I wear the earmuffs on top of earplugs, when life is just too damn LOUD.

Listening to music w/ earbuds or headphones is a great way to balance out background noises, especially if you can find soothing playlists that help you concentrate. Also useful to put in just one earbud when you need to pay attention in class/at work.

Pro tip: if your hair is long enough you can wear wireless earbuds without anyone knowing.

White noise, rain noises, ocean noises etc can be helpful! Some people like whale songs although personally this activates my primal fear response

Active noise cancelling headphones: the reason I wrote this post to begin with—I finally bought a pair! As in, a really good pair! As in, a depressingly expensive pair with noise cancelling technology that actually WORKS, holy shit. I probably need to wear them a little less at home (bc overprotection causes problems in the longterm) but they have absolutely transformed my ability to go out in public and i never ever want to take these suckers off again please take a power screwdriver and nail these to my head, bury me in the sweet sweet shroud of silence. holy canoli and cream puffs I want to marry form a civil partnership with these headphones. Plus they have a bunch of features, like being able to control the level of noise cancellation, so I can hold a conversation or be aware of some ambient noise for safety reasons.

Oh, and also they play music I guess?

Sorry sorry I promise this post wasn’t supposed to be me shilling for Big Electronics. I’m just excited, I’m an excited flabby little ball of expired flubber. ANC headphones aren’t a perfect solution, and I still sometimes wear earplugs underneath, and I will always be uncomfortable some of the time, but for me it’s been a big step.

Unfortunately the cost of good quality ANC technology means this isn’t an option for everyone, and the (much cheaper) gunshot protection earmuffs I mentioned earlier still provide an impressive amount of protection and bang-for-your buck (maybe even an equal amount of protection, if you can find ones that fit well). But if noise consistently prevents you from enjoying public space and life in general, and you’ve already tried earmuffs & earplugs and find they don’t offer enough comfort/convenience/protection, and if you’re in a position to save up for a one time non-necessity purchase of $150+, noise cancelling headphones are an option to be aware of. (Please always check the return policy so you can try before you buy. I ended up buying and returning 2 pairs before finding what worked best for me. And please look for a retailer that offers an extended warranty. You want those motherforkers to last).

There are cheaper options available, including some under $50. The ones I tried didn't work as well as my hearing protection earmuffs, but some people report good experiences, so that is something to consider. it's always good to know your options! Passive noise canceling is another affordable alternative.

Medication: A final tool in my toolbox, which for me personally has helped as much as every other method combined. Like, a lot, it’s helped a lot. It turns out some anti-anxiety medications can also help sensory issues. There’s not much research on this, and I only discovered it firsthand when a medication my doctor prescribed for anxiety ended up significantly helping my sensory issues. I no longer need medication for anxiety, but my psychiatrist still prescribes that same medication off-label for my sensory stuff. Ask your psychiatrist to research your options (they will probably have to do some digging to find relevant research, but you deserve to know all your options, even the obscure ones). Fyi, the medication I use is in the benzodiazepines class, but there are other options for those concerned about dependency or side effects.

(I'm also told anti-anxiety supplements may be helpful, though I haven't tried this yet. If you're on prescription meds, always talk to your doctor about contraindications before taking anything over-the-counter.)

So there you have it, my main coping strategies for sound sensitivity! They are not a replacement for medical treatment (except that last one which is in fact...medical treatment), but I find them helpful and I hope some of you will too! I’ve struggled for a long time, and I’m very pleased to have reached the point where I can just do things in public. Eating out in loud restaurants? I can do that now, and even enjoy it, holy shit! I can comfortably travel in cars for hours at a time, and walk around shopping malls and grocery stores with overhead music, and, and —and just exist. It is so so freeing, to feel like maybe, after everything, you are actually allowed to just exist in a world that wasn’t really designed for you.

Again, be careful not to overuse hearing protection—the goal is to allow you to be less uncomfortable and to function better, but if you find you are becoming more sensitive to noise, it is time to dial it back a notch. Or maybe consider listening to music (at a reasonable volume) to block out background noise instead.

*(This also includes people with hearing loss and related issues, btw. While that’s not my area of knowledge, I would welcome it if any of my HoH followers want to share their experiences.)

**A sign of sensory issues that parents often miss is when a child complains about music being too loud—but has no problem listening to their own music at high volume. This is because music that is already familiar to the listener (and that the listener enjoys) is much easier for the brain to process, since it knows what pattern of sounds to expect. Loud music that they get to control can be soothing for people with sound issues, especially when it blocks out background noise and sensations. This is why repetitively playing the same songs can be a helpful form of stimming.

***(working on this blog, actually. since it’s my only source of income, my 2020 income tax return literally lists my occupation as ‘Tumblr Blogger.’ Oddly, my parent didn’t feel this achievement was worth including in the holiday family newsletter.)

bonus fun fact: Charles Babbage aka “father of the computer” may have been autistic and hypersensitive to sound. He definitely had a huge problem with public noise pollution, and spent his later year waging a war on street musicians (and organ grinders in particular).

(bc like, yeah. screw organ grinders.)

Sometimes when I’m out in public and the overhead music is particularly unbearable, I’ll take a moment to look up to the sky and scream out: “HE TRIED TO WARN US! THE FATHER OF COMPUTERS TRIED TO WARN US!!! we should have listened, sweet heaven we should have listened!”

except i don’t scream it, i say it very quietly under my breath

(i have issues with noise)

so yeah that is my short essay. and here is the ko-fi goal

k ciao i gotta go pick out glitter stickers for my headphones

[marley-manson]

I love all your MASH posts! Do you have any thoughts to share on the varying ways the characters relate to queerness?

Thank you so much <3

You bet I do! I hope what you’re looking for here is a bunch of sexuality and gender related headcanons, because that’s what I’ve got.

None of these are hard and fast when it comes to like, writing fic or whatever, and there’s obviously room for a ton of different interpretations which is cool, but this is kind of like the default lens I watch the show through lol. Also I prioritize the show’s vibe over strict notions of historical accuracy wrt homophobia, but at the same time based on a couple books I’ve read it’s not necessarily historically inaccurate for a military unit to have a bunch of barely closeted people and for no one to really care lol, from what I’ve read it really varied depending on the unit and COs. It got dicier in the 50s as opposed to the early 40s with some official policy changes and the lavender scare, but probably still not impossible, at least according to anecdotal evidence.

Also obviously since this is based on mountains of gay jokes it’s not going to completely fit every moment in every episode, but ykw, the implications are still a lot more consistent than you’d probably expect lol.

So anyway. This got long so it’s under a cut.

Hawkeye:

Bi, has known it for a long time, and is perfectly secure and comfortable with it. I like to think he favours men a little over women, like a kinsey 4.5. No real reason, but it’s my headcanon so there.

Was somewhat into the gay scene back in the states, has had lots of anonymous sex and short term flings and maybe couple longer term male partners.

Carlye knows he's bi though he was probably monogamous while he was with her (I say this because their first scene together reads so strongly to me like he's trying to imply he's with BJ now to save face after learning she's married lmao).

On the slightly effeminate side but doesn't play it up much (I'm differentiating this from the onslaught of combatative jokes, I'm talking mannerisms and speech patterns), though he's happy to lean into queeny stereotypes a little to piss people off. Very nearly canonically a bottom lol, though I can see him occasionally switching, and very nearly canonically into tall, broad guys with a sense of humour, full lips, a nice ass, and a big dick based on the shoe size jokes.

I think his dad knows and is relatively cool about it too. I don't see it causing a lot of drama in his life, I think he's one of the lucky ones, which contributes to his relative lack of fear.

Though that said one headcanon I have is that some kind of close call with nearly getting caught or accused and discharged happened between season 7+8, which is why he tones it down so much in late Mash.

Hm what else... I just posted about this lol but after the war I can see him getting more politically engaged and casually joining the gay communist scene.

Trapper:

Also bi and knows it, more careful and discrete about it (back in the states) what with presumably being from a pretty catholic family and being married. My logic is if the jokes are Hawkeye's bi evidence, then Trapper with almost the same amount and as a totally game participant has the same evidence, but he does have a more conscious of consequences vibe to me.

I’m torn on whether Trapper was somewhat into the gay scene stateside, or if his experience was mainly just anonymous sex while cruising. I could see an argument for the latter being more realistic and plausible, BUT I’m kind of enamoured with the idea of Trapper being just as out, in the old school ‘part of a community’ sense, as Hawkeye. It could even be a fun nod to their original book backstory where they’d coincidentally met once at a football game - except they vaguely recognize each other from the Boston bar scene lol. Maybe they fucked in a bathroom stall once.

Either way I like to think he and Hawkeye started hooking up almost immediately, then became friends, then caught feelings, and Hawkeye was the first guy Trapper ever had romantic feelings for. It doesn't perfectly fit every moment - eg if you take their exchange at the end of George (what secrets do you have in your past?) as a gay reference, which I mean considering the context it's impossible not to, that implies Trapper doesn't officially know, but it ain't about the exacting details, it's about the Vibes.

Henry:

Mildly bi swinger. He's still cheating on his wife and vice versa because they're supposed to only fuck other people as a couple. Maybe doesn't really think of himself as bi bc it’s group sex, at least at first. I'm pretty sure someone was deliberately implying some of this lol, c'mon I saw Dear Dad 3, and he gets some of the most eyebrow raising gay jokes and moments.

(One of my favourite jokes: Henry makes a PA announcement about a meeting at 0700 hours. “Is that AD or BC?” "I don't know, I never could tell with Henry." Note that AC/DC was contemporary slang for bi.)

Also has a crush on Klinger, obviously.

Klinger:

Bi and nonbinary, initially repressed about both. Comes to terms with being bi partway through the show since he's clearly hooking up with Radar by season 4, so. I like to think he had sex with Trapper at some point in season 3 too, and idgaf about Laverne here. Maybe he figures it doesn’t count if it’s with dudes. Comes to terms with his gender much later, post-canon. Would probably consider himself a transvestite, historically speaking.

Like the way he still wears his pink housecoat, complete with a bow sometimes, even after dropping the section 8 attempts? The fur coat too? In one of the most recent episodes I rewatched, in season 10, he had a bra in his footlocker, and in a season 9 episode he had pink heels stashed in one of the file cabinets, uncommented on. Soon Lee wants to see him in a dress. It all fits.

I think after he gets back to the states he opens a dress shop, slowly and organically starts acquiring a discrete trans and drag queen clientele since he's very skilled at altering women's clothes to fit a masculine build, makes some friends, gets invited to some events, and starts fully embracing his femininity.

Margaret:

I kinda like the repressed lesbian take. Her attraction to men always feels so forced and performative, like she's trying so hard to fit a role. I can also see her as bi, but I vote lesbian. I think she fucked women in college, including Lorraine, and has told herself it was just an immature phase since. Also repressed butch. Someday she finally gets that crewcut.

Radar:

Repressed gay or bi with some internalized homophobia, but chills out about it eventually. I mean come on, that scene where he gets offended when changing in front of Hawkeye? His typical noooo stoooop reactions to the gay jokes in general? Klinger was his plausible deniability dude where he could be like 'it's not gay bc i think of him as a girl.' They break it off somewhere in season 5.

Father Mulcahy:

Gay but a catholic priest, so off limits. Knows he's gay but doesn't act on it. Chill with all the gay vibes around the 4077 in accordance with his fairly live and let live attitude, regardless of whether that actually makes much sense for him as a Catholic. Whatever, there’s always exceptions to common rules and maybe he’s one of them.

Frank:

Repressed bi, but not all that repressed. Like he knows it, but denies it in his head in a way that doesn't even convince himself, like reciting a rote platitude. Internalized homophobia up to here. Would absolutely still date a guy if anyone likeable ever expressed genuine interest because he's that desperate for approval and easily malleable.

BJ:

I tend to favour the repressed gay or bi take. I see the reasoning, it makes sense to me, and it’s a fun way to watch the show. It fits what I percieve as his initial awkwardness with Hawkeye’s gay jokes in his first few seasons, including occasional no homo style defensiveness, or bringing up his own masculinity, etc. Also the way he doesn’t seem to notice that Hawkeye is blatantly hitting on him at the airport bar. The gay read in particular fits the way his fixation on his family is explicitly framed as a coping mechanism too.

I really enjoy thinking that BJ knows Hawkeye is into men and specifically into him by like, around season 7/8. Maybe not a sudden realizaton, but a sort of gradual understanding. It adds a certain je ne sais quoi to their late series interactions, and feels oddly appropriate.

I like to think he realizes he’s not straight in whichever way and is in love with Hawkeye about a year or two after going home lol, amid a crumbling marriage. But I don’t endgame ship them, so I think this revelation comes too late, Hawkeye has already moved on, and he goes back to San Francisco and either saves his marriage or finds himself a nice boyfriend.

Charles:

Gay, aware but possibly refuses to act on it due to internalized homophobia and ~respectability~, or if he does, he’s very discrete and careful. On the hunt for a suitable lavender marriage.

Potter:

He’s the token straight to me, sorry.

Random related thoughts:

I think Hawkeye and Trapper and Henry and Klinger fostered the carefree anything goes atmosphere of the 4077 just by being the way they are and being chill.

I like to think there was a gay poker night once a month. Zale accidentally crashed it in Pay Day. Klinger goes even though he doesn't consider himself anything but a straight man at first, but he's always down for a poker game and he points out that he fits in just fine.

Whenever new lgbt people arrive at the 4077 they go to either Hawkeye or Klinger first since they’re so loud, and early on Klinger might point them in Hawkeye’s direction, and Hawkeye tells them where the Seoul + Tokyo bars are and invites them to the poker game.

I think Hawkeye's subplot in Of Moose and Men was coded homophobia. Textually it was the officer being offended that Hawkeye is insubordinate, but come on, "I don't want that man touching me," followed by a sex joke about Hawkeye giving him a sedative in the ass? Followed by dude continually being disturbed by him? They really made "goof off" sound like a slur lol. Rally Round the Flagg Boys also had a milder version of this with communist substituted. Idk if it’s intentional in either case, but the vibes were there.

Margaret found out that Hawkeye’s bi at some point not long after they slept together. I could see him coming out to her during one of their heart to hearts, honestly, maybe even by accident. Maybe it helps her come to terms with her own sexuality too.

By season 4 Hawkeye and Klinger are both aware of each others’ sexualities and sort of bond over being the only 2 somewhat out guys left in the main cast. The way they start hanging out more, for a while Hawkeye’s gay jokes come out more in scenes with Klinger than in scenes with BJ, and just in general their mid-show interactions tend to have that ‘the two out cousins at the family reunion’ solidarity vibe.

I think Hawkeye thinks BJ is straight throughout the whole run of the show, but also knows BJ is sort of using him as a platonic wife replacement. Actually I think Hawkeye encouraged it early on while lowkey trying to seduce him, eventually had to be like ‘damn guess he’s straight after all,’ but by now it’s too late to reverse course and so he’s stuck pining in this weird pseudo romantic friendship.

Aaaand okay I have to stop at some point so I’m sure I have more but let’s call it good.

[ihopethisendswell]

The part where you get basic info on my Pokémon oc's so you don't get confused when I post about them.

This is gonna be a long post. I have like 8 total. 16 if your counting the secondary protags (my version of May and Lucas for example,which I won't be going over in detail cause I'm not insane). Might want to check my timeline 9 it's pinned or just check bulbapedia if your confused about the ages. If you have any questions feel free to ask. I hope you enjoy :)

Name :Jin Amachi

Gender: " I am nonbinary. I they/ them pronouns, but I'm alright with he/ him as well.

Age:

12( when started journey in Hoenn( Emerald)

22 by SM/USUSM

26 by SWSH

Basic info: With all things said and done, Jin is grateful for their journey. They learned a lot, even if they had to stop two extreme environmentalist along the way. They know the two meant well, but it's just too bizarre for it to happen. Though the two seem to be in a better place now. They're happy for them. They're father and them talk more now. It's still awkward, but better. They know he's trying his best, and they will do the same. It's much better than back then. But no need to worry about the past.

If anything, they're more worried about the others.

Kenji Elm

Gender: " I'm getting sudden dejavu. But I'm a boy! The best boy! Don't call me a girl, I will cry. And because I'm not one! So don't. Anyway have you heard of-" * starts to ramble*

Age:

10 when journey started in Johto( HGSS)

17 by SM

21 by SWSH

Basic Info: Kenji Elm is not the biological son of Professor Elm. He was adopted at a young age, and he doesn't know who is birth parents. Not that he cares. He's more than happy with the family he got( though he wonders when they'll throw him away like his parents did). Energetic and always willing for an adventure, Kenji is generally on the move!( He's so sorry if he's being annoying please don't leave please)

He has a vast amount of interests, but his two favorites are painting and battling. Battling is obvious, he's the champion of the Indigo League, but he always had an artistic eye. But his favorite pastime is hanging out with his friends! When he gets the time of course. He's sometimes wonder how he was able to hold the title of champion for so long though haha ( his win was a fluke he knows it he knows it) .But yeah! That's Kenji! Always there with a smile! Our little golden boy! 😁

Name: Danica Yamamoto

Gender: "I'm a girl. She/her pronouns. They/ them is cool too. Don't mind Kenji, he talks a lot." *Offended Kenji noises in the background*

Age:

11 when journey started in Sinnoh( Platinum)

18 by SM)

22 by SWSH

Basic Info: Giratina and Arcues are quite alike, the more she thinks about it. Though, the rest if Sinnoh, quite possibly the whole world would disagree with her. Giratina is " the lord of darkness". It's followers have a history of not being....the best. Giratina resides alone in the Distortion World, paying for it's past sins. Clearly, Giratina and Arcues are nothing alike.

Hm? Oh. Right. Pardon.

Danica grew up in Twinleaf town, with her best friend Barry. Those two are almost polar opposites. Barry is always moving, going fast, and doesn't wait for no one( except Danica and Emmet). Danica can go fast, possibly faster than Barry, but likes to take things slow. Both can be quite chaotic.Barry has a bit of a temper, Danica's chill. Both are cases where you should run when they are angry. Like. Very angry. The two bounces of each other well,and hang out regularly with Emmet, even with their busy professions ( Danica as champion, Barry as Frontier Brain and Emmet as a professor). Danica loves baking, and would often be making poffins and other baked treats for her, her pokemon and others ! She's also a bit of a nerd, so you'll also find her in a library or two. Her pokemon are her babies, and she hopes to have plenty of battles with them in the future!

.....

But really. They are quite alike. Both are beings of great power. Both have a following, even if one is less seen. Both are feared. They are feared greatly. Do they fear each other? Did Arcues banish Giratina in fear of the world or in fear of losing control? Did Giratina learn it's lesson after eons of being in the Distortion World? She could never tell. It doesn't really open up much, only going back to said Distortion World on its own Accord( it felt wrong to be it's "owner"). Though it do comes back, surprisingly. Maybe because she asked it to. To make sure Cyrus doesn't die in there. He still won't come out. She doesn't understand why. It's been years. Has he learned his lesson? Giratina seems to be fond of him. Affectionate. Cyrus never objects to this. So he must right? Right?

Ah, getting off topic. They're quite alike, being feared by the masses. Even if Arcues is mostly beloved. It's a god. It has such power. They're both feared. They themselves must fear as well . It must get lonely....... She thinks she gets Cyrus now.

Name: Alexis " Alex" Jones

Gender: " Um, hi? I'm just a dude. Use he/ him pronouns.....yeah"

Age:

14 when journey started in Unova( BW)

18 by SM

22 by SWSH

Basic info: It's so funny, the more he thinks about. He was so excited, despite his worries. He was going on a journey. A gym challenge. Pathway to champion. He was going to do that! With his sister and his friends! On his birthday! It was perfect! It should have been perfect! But everything just went wrong.

The bodies, the blood, the pressure to " be a hero"( intentional or not), it was all too much. Too much. Then- then he was a coward. He fled it all. Even after saving the day. It was stupid. So stupid. And the people in his life had a right to be angry. Why wouldn't they? He deserved it, really. But now things are better(?). He has a daycare to co-run, he's gradually learning his way as a pokemon medic, and he still has his pokemon( the ones that were lucky enough to survive). He's so grateful for them. He doesn't battle, though. No, he's never doing that ever again. He's caused enough harm( he hates how he stares at trainers battling). He's no good anyway( he hates how bored his team looks half the time) . He doesn't understand why people insist that he is( he hates that he has this itch, this desire). He doesn't understand why they look so disappointed when he says he doesn't battle anymore( he hates that he misses the rush, the strategy, the freedom of it all). He's fine with what he got. He's no hero.

.....Why is his aunt calling him?

Name: Evangeline " Eva" Ortiz

Gender: " Hiya! I'm a lovely lady! I use she/her pronouns, please and thank you!"

Age:

14 when journey started ( B2W2)

16 by SM

20 by SwSh

Basic Info: Eva! Eva my Beloved. Eva's fun, y'know? Always moving, helping, laughing, smiling. Life of the party! She rivals Kenji with that winning smile. Not to mention that she's a great battler! It's almost like she was born for this. Maybe she is! Who knows. But what she do know is that she's Unova's Champ and she gotta defend her title! And protect her region! Though she probably would have done that without the title anyway haha! Hmm what else? Oh! She loves technology! For some reason that surprises a lot of people that don't really know her, but she does! She's a bit of a tinkerer if she do say so herself. She likes it when people compliment on her skills it makes her more confident in them. Even Col-

No.

....

Ahem.

Anyway she's pretty talented. But that comes from a lot of hard work! And luck. But lots of hard work.( And also luck). Aaaah, that should that's it? Well, she does tend to be distant, b-but she's busy, yeah? Don't worry about it. Oh! One more thing. It's not really a big deal, just a random fact.

She hates the cold.

Name Jude Bellrose

Gender: "...... Why do you care ?" ( E: Jude don't be rude! Al: No no, she has a point.) *Ooc: Jude is genderfluid. Right now, in this post, she's using she/ her pronouns, but she also uses he/him and they/them*

Age:

18 when journey started in Kalos( XY)

20 by SM

24 by SwSh

Basic info: Death has a way of teaching you things. Jude learned a lot from it. She learns to not take it for granted, both death itself and the one that is dead.She learns to be humble. She learns to be kind.

Jude was, and still is, prickly. She's not rude my any means, unless she is, but she's just hard to become friends with. She used to have this philosophy of trainer and pokemon; they should be no emotional bonds. They're not here for that. They're here to win. And she did. Until she didn't. Her first pokemon died. It devastated her. Her pokemon, surprisingly, comforted her. And then another one died, and her pokemon comforted her again. Star, her Staraptor, was strong. So strong, and yet it died, and she cried and get pokemon cried with her. She never felt so loved. Not saying that her mother doesn't love her, the opposite really, it's just things have been....complicated. Couple that with strangers turn( begrudgingly) friends, and Jude's heart turned all warm inside. Not that she'll ever admit that outloud.

Jude is a kind person, despite her prickly nature. She loves the world around her, loves her friends, loves her pokemon. She respects death, despite the pain she causes her. The world itself of beautiful as it is, which it's such a shame that a capitalist fool a certain someone couldn't see that way( poor Sycamore).

Jude is a good trainer, despite her loss. She knows this. She'll prove it too the moon and back. If only a certain someone thought the same for himself.

Aster Mahina

Gender: "...." "Mizzz Aster is a girl! She uses she/her pronouns! Zzt."

Age:

11 in SM, where her journey started

15 by SwSh

Basic Bio: Aster doesn't hate Kanto. She doesn't. She was born there and lived there for 11 years. She just doesn't want to back. But she has to, cause she's " the first champion of Alola and as champion" yada yada yada. Like. She gets it. Being Alola's first and currently only champion, you gotta make an impression. She gets that. She still doesn't want to go. Even when she's been there, like, 4 times now. There are some good things in Kanto though. Lillie is there. And seeing Lillie physically is always a plus. She also gets to see Uncle Red, Uncle Green, and Aunt Blue. Kenji, while not living in Kanto, is champion of the Indigo League, and it's always fun with Kenji( she loves his art). But. Like. She still doesn't want to go.

But she also likes being Champion. That means she's strong. And since she's strong she can protect her mom. But she can't protect her mom when she's all the way in Kanto! What if he comes back? What if goes to Alola when she's away? She knows that her mom is strong, she knows that but still!

No. No it's okay. Her mom is strong. Lillie is strong. Gladion is strong . Hau is strong. Guzma is strong. They're all strong. She's strong.

She is strong.

Name: Naomi Einar

Gender: "I-I'm a girl! She/her pronouns please!"

Age:

15 in SWSH, which is the start of her gym challenge in Galar!

Basic Info: Hop is pretty convincing, she realizes. Or maybe she's very weak willed. " Let's do the gym challenge together!" He said. He had that look in his eye. She couldn't say no. Or she could, but that would make him upset, and that's the last thing she wants.

If she's being honest with herself, she's scared. She doesn't like big crowds, the attention. They'll be so many eyes on her. So many. A-and then there's Lee and her cousin, Alexis. Hop has made her sit down and watch almost every single match Leon has had. He's an amazing trainer. A-and her mum would tell her stories about Alexis. He was a hero! He stopped an evil team and everything! She can't live up to that! She never even battled before, why would Hop-

No. It's okay. It's okay. She- she'll just quite after failing the first gym. She can handle the embarrassment. And then she'll cheer Hop on when he wins against his brother. Yep. She'll do just that. Okay. Okay.

.....

Everyday, Slumbering Weald seem to intrigue her more and more. It's almost like it's calling her. Da?

No. It- it'sprobably nothing.

[thegeminisage]

question to Miss Experienced Professional Fic Author Liz—do you have your betas read your fic from the beginning, as soon as you start writing it? like i know you mentioned cathy and emily (?) have access to the doc. is that standard procedure? i'm curious because I've never written fic myself but I was drafting something today and my friend's gonna beta once i'm done but I was wondering if I should have her beta thorughout the whole process.

HI sorry i saved your ask for last bc i didn’t want it to get buried <3 and then it got so late that i didn’t know if you’d see it if i answered <3 this was extremely professional behavior <3 so i’m...................scheduling it to go up when people are awake. sorry again lol

anyway ok so the SHORT answer to this is: if you don’t know that your friend is willing to look over your fic multiple times, get your thing as polished and close to done as possible before letting anyone else beta it. that way, your second pair of eyes is able to do the maximum amount of good! if it’s a longer fic, you may be able to do this in sections - you can finish chapter 1 and then have your friend look at chapter 1, then chapter 2, etc, since nobody can beta a multichapter fic in one sitting. it depends v much on what you and your friend feel like! 

the looooong answer is: my “betas” are also just my friends! same hat! so more often than not they just want to see what i’m doing. so if i mention what i’m working on they’re like “oh can i see” and i’m like “yeah” and then they come in and look. like, as far as standard procedure goes, it’s all very casual. if it’s too rough for proofreading i’ll usually wind up giving a heads up that it may change a lot later in case they don’t want to read it multiple times, but usually they do anyway (so in my case it winds up being a mix of both “edit now” and “edit at the end”). i’m really very lucky to have so many extremely smart and cool people willing to do that kind of thing for me <3

that said, imo there are different ways to edit and things to edit for - it’s not as complex and awful as it sounds, for me different people wind up helping me with different things. it really depends on what stage your writing is at/what your friend is helping you edit for. i categorize them as follows:

cheerleading - this is what i was talking about above...this is just someone reading as you write (sometimes checking in daily, sometimes literally WHILE YOU TYPE IT, my friends have done this lol) and encouraging you. i’m not particularly shy about letting my buddies just kinda hang out in there, it’s like my little house 🙏 it’s also fun to have people read as i go (it helps keep me excited). doesn’t exactly count as editing/betaing imo (so you don’t necessarily need a writing-savvy friend to do it), but it’s still a level of support <3

plot soundboarding - this is stuff like... “how do i get dean and cas to talk about x thing,” “where should i end this chapter,” “if i change this thing in chapter 1 that leaves a huge plothole in chapter 3, how do i fix it?” this is for the plot, not the prose itself, so you can do this when the fic is very rough, maybe even before it’s written, when it’s still in the planning stages

“regular betaing” - this is what most people think of when they say beta - this is a general readthru where they’ll point out inconsistencies or anything that sticks out to them (good or bad). “this sentence is worded awkwardly,” “you said mary had a cup of coffee here but earlier in the scene she had tea,” “you used the same word four times in one paragraph.” you want to have the fic written by this point (though again if it’s a long one, it doesn’t necessarily have to be complete - more on this in a sec)

final typo check - you want to save the LAST typo check for after everything else is perfect and not going to be changed at all. my friend coralie is checking my fic for typos and i asked her not to read unedited scenes yet - because of course if edit them, and my edits have typos, and she’s already read those parts, i’d have typos in the checked bits, which would defeat the entire purpose

so it really depends on what you want your friend to most help with - if you want plot help, obviously you’d come in early, but if it’s just typo help, come in late. and of course how much help she’s up for giving you - reading what you write daily might be more time-intensive than just checking it one time and sending it back. 

as for whether or not it’s better to have “regular beta” stuff done on your writing as you write it or after it’s all finished, there’s pros and cons to both situations

reasons to edit as you go: a long fic divided into sections can seem more manageable, your pal gets to know your your project as it’s being written, you get someone to be excited with, you get immediate feedback on potential mistakes that might save you from having to do more editing later, editing as you go will DEFINITELY save you from a huge slog later, sometimes when you’re not up to writing it’s nice to have something to edit so at least you get to do a little work on it

reasons to edit after it’s finished: less time-intensive, when you can see the whole fic at once you’re less prone to forgetting what happened in the beginning, when you see it all at once you can also see the way things come together (or fail to come together), you're less likely to have to look over the same section multiple times, you get to polish it up before anyone else sees it (good if you’re shy), sometimes it’s nice to let things sit awhile before coming back to edit because breaks can help you see more clearly

and like i said, i usually wind up doing a mix of this. the important thing though is there’s really no wrong way to do it as long you and the person helping you are on the same page. just like everybody has a different writing process, everybody has a different editing process, yk? just try it whatever way seems most appealing and sensible to you, and eventually you’ll hit your groove. i hope that helps, sorry if it was a way longer answer than you were bargaining for lol

[a-libra-writes]

Could you do ⛅ 💎 💥 💤 and 🌸 with Aberama Gold? You can delete this if you want to cause idk if I sent this beyond a deadline. And if you do it you can choose one of the emoji, I liked them all lol so I'm fine with whichever one you want. Thank you so much, I love how you write for Aberama so it would mean a lot if you do write the headcanon. Not that I'm trying to guilt trip you into doing it, not my intention at all. I just really live your writing and wouldn't be hurt if you didnt write it.

aaghh sorry i took so long with this!! stupid work grumble grumble save me. I hope u didnt think I deleted it haha, I like Aberama a heckin lot. Glad you like how I write him! OK LETS GO LONG BOI

⛅ Sunset HC

He loves watching the sunset. Once you got to know him, this didn’t seem so strange. As the afternoon began to end, you’d notice him glance toward the sky no matter where you two were, and he’d be a little more distracted if it was an especially clear, beautiful day.

Getting such pretty sunsets wasn’t too common in London,  or any city, which is why he preferred being out in the country. 

Aberama used to think by himself during these times, but he began to like it when you joined him. He’d have you sit on his lap and chat with him - and if that was too embarrassing - at least sit beside him. During the colder months he’d wrap his jacket around you (and probably put the hat on you too, because you’re too cute).

When he’s feeling particularly sentimental, he’ll tell you all about how beautiful you look with the golden and red colors shining on your eyes and skin. He’ll sweet talk you until the moon comes up.

His favorite sunsets are the fiery orange and red ones that are scattered with clouds. To him, they look like a glimpse of heaven... he often thinks these are the only looks he’ll get of that place.

💎 Marriage HC

It was obvious when he was smitten with you, and more obvious that he wanted something more long-term. He’s actually quite a romantic man, in spite of his occupation, and he wanted to make a life with you. He thought you were just perfect.

And yes, he was a bit into the age gap.

Your wedding was modest, but surrounded with family and the reception is lively. Plenty of dancing, drinking, music and laughter, and his family put together a new wagon that was decorated in flowers and vines, just for you. Aberama couldn’t keep you out of his lap or his arms the whole time. 

Depending on your preferences, you either had a small cottage in a village or you stayed with his family in the wagons. Due to his jobs, Aberama would disappear for days at a time, sometimes a week or more. He’d come home, tired and a mess - sometimes injured - but he always gave you a kiss and hug before washing up. He preferred to be clean and in a change of clothes before holding you again.

He doesn’t discuss his jobs with you, period. He doesn’t want you getting tangled up in them, and he’s expressly forbid his men and Bonnie from discussing it with you. Even if it frustrates and worries you, he doesn’t budge on this decision.

If you didn’t know Romani, he’d gradually teach you. Since he wasn’t around all the time, Bonnie and his daughters would help.

He’s very delighted that you get along with his children, especially the younger girls, who don’t remember much of their mother. As much as he’d love children with you, he’d understand if his were more than enough. 

Bonnie sees you as more of an older sister figure than a mother - since he still remembers his mom - but you two still get along great. You’re usually patching him up after a boxing match or cooking him filling food. He’s glad you made his dad happy, but could you two please stop being so sappy in front of him and his friends? Thanks.

Once Tommy meets you and realizes how much Aberama dotes on you, he makes a point to invite you to gatherings together. He hopes you’ll calm the man down or act as a pacifying presence. It ... sort of works. While he is in a better mood with you on his arm, he’s also far more likely to bash the teeth out of any man who disrespects you.

He’ll bash the teeth out of his own men if they dare the same thing, and that’s if they’re lucky. Bonnie doesn’t tell you, but he’s seen his father send more than one man to a ditch for insulting you and your family (especially if you were non-Romani).

No matter what, he’d be protective of you, but it would happen behind the scenes. He wouldn’t want you to feel like he was being possessive or suffocating, so he’ll have a guard or two quietly watch your home when he’ s away, and he’ll deal with the before mentioned troublesome men on his own.

This has led to situations where you go to him in a panic, saying a strange man has been following you and standing around the house. He grabs his gun and investigates and ... it’s one of his idiots. “Be more careful, would you? Just go the fuck home, I’m here anyway.” 

When he comes back he acts like he chased off some scary robber and you play along and give him plenty of kisses.

Basically, you two have a very loving, sappy marriage that makes people forget he’s one of the deadliest guns-for-hire in England. 

💤 Napping HC

Aberama hardly ever naps, but he can fall asleep anywhere. You have no idea how he does it. He can do sitting in a horse, leaning against a wall or standing up. 

His “technical” naps are when he gets back from a job in the middle of the afternoon. He’d been up for days at that point, and he collapses on the couch and tells you he’s just going to rest his eyes for a few moments. You eventually gently wake him.

Still, he much prefers to fall asleep next to you. After staying up for an ungodly amount of time, he’ll let you drag him to bed, only if you promise to lie down by his side. 

When he sleeps, he reminds you of a cat with how he tucks his head down and curls into himself. Often his face twitches with expressions, but only for a moment.

💥First Fight / Making up HC

Your first fight is also what your subsequent fights and squabbles have been about: The danger of his jobs, and what little you know about them. Aberama wouldn’t give in, curtly telling you there was zero reason for you to be involved.

You knew about these “jobs” while he courted you, and you didn’t delude yourself into thinking he’d stop after you married. But this time he came home with two bullet wounds, and he was gone for two weeks. Couldn’t he at least have sent a man to tell you he was alright? Or where he was? That he was hurt? At least that?

Aberama just dismissed you, which he so rarely did, as he was just as tired and frustrated... Not to mention the wounds. He hoped in the morning, you’d understand, and both your moods would be better.

It wasn’t. You were still pissed, so he left, insisting he’d be back.

You fumed, but began to worry. What if you were too harsh, especially since he was in such bad shape? Maybe he didn���t want to worry you, or maybe someone was on his trail and he didn’t want anything coming back to you. He always kept you and his daughters out of his messes. Maybe ...

Your mind began to race, and you were feeling frustrated and emotional all over again. You decided to go look for him, it wouldn’t be hard. Right as you opened the door, Aberama was walking up to the doorstep. He had bought your favorite flowers and he quickly pulled you into an embrace. 

While he still thought he was doing what was best for your safety, he understood your worry and recognized he was dismissing your concerns. He said all this, giving you plenty of kisses and apologies.

He wanted to make love to you to show you how truly sorry he was but those bullet wounds were kind of, you know, painful as all hell. Aberama was still gonna go for it but you insisted “cuddles until that’s healed”.

🌸Kissing HC

There’s no such thing as chaste kisses or pecks unless he’s truly in a hurry. He feels so much for you that those just seem inadequate displays of affection.

Whenever he kisses you, he wants to properly show his love, although it never does seem like enough. He’ll hold the small of your back and bring you closer, because you always have to be close when he does this. If there’s not many people around, or better - none - he’ll start at your neck and work his way to your lips.

The kisses on your lips are always deep, and you feel yourself pressing back against him. If he has to say goodbye, he’ll make sure it’s longer, and he’ll promptly kiss your cheek and promise to be back soon.

Even when you’re just parting for a few hours while he goes to the boxing ring or you leave to town, he’ll pull you into his embrace and give you a firm kiss. “Behave yourself, dear.”  “Aberama, I always tell you that.”

It’s kind of nauseating to anyone who watches, Bonnie has long learned to just walk away 

To be sure, it’s very jarring for some of his men to see their terrifying boss turn to his wife, give her a sweet kiss, then turn to them with a sharp gleam in his eye, like he’s daring them to say something.

At home, he often gives you stray kisses on your neck, your cheek, your hand, whatever suits his whims at the time. In bed, even if you aren’t making love, he wants to give you several kisses goodnight. When he walks into the house and you’re already asleep, he’ll give gentle kisses that won’t make you stir. He hopes you can feel them in your dreams.

[minnowrowdy]

Alrighty peeps, I got an update.

I found a system for me on catching up on late work-

that has worked for a few weeks already!!

I feel so accomplished every time I think about it, because I've been trying to drudge up all ounces of motivation, energy, courage, and more in order to ignore my anxiety about my missing work, and it hasn't worked much.

On Feb 11 or so I started a list of every assignment that I complete.

I have a separate page outlining the rules.

I know myself, and deadlines stress me out and I procrastinate until it's necessary to do them. ( In fact, this was a big reason for my current inability to complete the ones past due.)

So why should I make a deadline?

I shouldn't.

Instead, I have created on the 2nd page some rules, and something to work towards.

Since I am currently consuming every video and stream about the amigops as I can, specifically corpse_husband, I have decided to use his new streams as mine.

Then, since I know the date the stream is made days beforehand, and I know he has a playlist for live streams that have already past, it removes the obligation to do things by a certain time.

Instead, I now have excitement to work on everything to be able to watch it as soon as possible.

On the separate page, I also have added 2 labels. Complete, and Days Passed.

On the day I create my thing to look forward to, I start with 3 assignments to do. If I achieve the 3 on the first day, I add those as marks on my Completed area, and can watch. But every day I don't have the completed area achieved entirely, I add a tally to the area labeled Days Passed.

To paraphrase the last part, I start with 3 on the first day, and add 2 more things to do each tally mark of the Days Passed area, unless I have it completed.

For every assignment I do, I have also gotten in the habit of writing it down on my first page. Today, I looked at the list and it was a full page, when I still believed it was half-full. That was a nice confidence booster!

Currently, my set reward is watching the stream from the 23rd, and I am 8/13 assignments away from it!

There is a bit of math to think of each time I check the list, but that's okay because it makes me want to know how close I am to finishing even more.

The 13 assignment total looks scary, but I am happy because it's been only 5 days and I've made 8 assignments already. That's a vast improvement than previously, where I struggled to even complete 1 in a week.

There are still days I can barely remember to mark a new tally in the Days Passed before I forget, including last night where I literally had to get myself out of bed at 11:30pm because I barely remembered then and knew if I didn't it would be a while before I would again. Perhaps making this some sort of calendar might be better instead of a tally, unclear yet.

I do have to keep myself from going in the tags on tumblr to find out about the streams, though, but I sometimes do and scroll past tings quickly so I can find any more possible lobby notices by them.

I decided not to stop myself from watching any youtube videos at all or old streams of his I've already seen, because I would be bored and wouldn't feel more accomplished if I could do nothing I wanted to when avoiding work. Now, I'm procrastinating a few hours til I forgot about it and enjoying it, then willingly deciding to work on what I can to earn more tally marks in completed quicker so I can see the new streams.

Since these are late or incomplete, they don't have a deadline. So newer assignments don't quite have the same effect as these, which presents a future problem. A nice but unpredicted outcome was me actually completing today's assignment the hour it was given, because I just wanted more tallies added!

I got lucky because corpse decided to create more among us lobbies recently. 😂

I have slight guilt every time I use more of the paper in a notebook, so I tend to write to try and 'save space', which is illogical considering the amount of notebooks made in the world and how if I don't fill it the pages will stay blank and be unused anyway?

Unless you also are having missed work, an interest that is 'updated' multiple times to keep you finding new parts of it, and don't find doing a little math irritating, then this wouldn't work at all for you, but there are probably so many ways to revise this? Sorry 😞

I am mainly just sharing this because I am proud that something I came up with on a whim worked so well for the past few weeks.

I would be very interested in any possible revisions or any comments you have for this

[bearpillowmonster]

FF6 (Characters)

You can name most of the characters (playable ones anyway) but I kept some because I liked them. Trust me, I'm listing a bunch of characters but don't assume that it's too many because somehow, someway, this game knows how to balance them and make most of them pretty interesting. You can also only have four in your party at one time and are made interchangeable for the most part, so there's that.

A lot of these characters come with their own side-quests and other than venturing off the beaten path to get a specific set of armor or a weapon, the characters are actually most of the side-quests so they feel natural and apart of the story but not so much so that it feels empty "without" them or forced "with" them. The other "quests" I guess I'll call them are mainly collecting magicites. I didn't do every single one and I won't list EVERYTHING but the ones that I didn't do and that actually had story, I just looked up afterwards.

Terra. She reminds me a lot of Gwen from Ben 10: AF/UA because she's the last natural magic user and has a form much like Gwen's mana form. It basically boils down to that she was brainwashed by the empire, finds out her parents' backstory and wonders if love is possible for her like it was for them.

Locke. He had a girl that he liked named Rachel but he failed to protect her so she's kept in stasis, surrounded by flowers until he finds a way to save her. He's also a treasure hunter and he has the ability to take items from different enemies, sometimes useful armor, sometimes some heal items, heck while he's back there rummaging around in the enemy's drawers, he even does some damage.

Gau, who I called Tachi. He's more gameplay than story because he's just a kid, a homeless kid who lives out in the wild, leaps around and talks like Tarzan. His ability though...when you first meet him, you let him join you by giving him some food (dried meat, his favorite) and then once he joins your party, he has the ability to learn an enemy's moveset, which you only have to do a little bit to really gain any traction. So let me say just how powerful that makes him. The bomb is a consistent enemy in the FF series, not the most powerful but one that can self destruct. Imagine taking that self-destruct and turning it into a weapon for maximum damage and once you set which enemy's moveset you want to use for the battle, you don't have to do it anymore! So he'll just keep rolling whatever move is best and keep attacking without you telling him to! He might seem weaker in the end game territory but when you first find him and learn how to use him properly and level him up, he's quite the character.

Cyan. I saw his face and thought "Cyan" because I wanted a character named after a color but despite never seeing him before, I looked down at his preset name "Cyan". It was meant to be! He has these attacks called "Bushido" where you get to pick 1-8 (once you unlock them, that is) and it makes him do a special move. They're pretty powerful and if you know an enemy's weakness, you can really get some good combos in. His story more or less starts off with a blank slate because you see his whole kingdom die at the hands of Kefka poisoning the river (which then poisoned the air) and his story doesn't even neccessarily imply revenge, it's just stopping Kefka and his forces so that stuff like that doesn't happen again, and having the Returners' (what this whole group is called) cause basically acting as a magnet for him, how could he not? I definitely suggest his sidequest, it's one of the more meaty ones so it's got some story to chew on, it's not an easy quest though so if anything just look it up.

King Edgar, who I called Gap. He was easily one of if not the most consistent member of my party and for one major reason. His tools. He has all these tools that you can equip and I'm here for all of them. He has a drill that does major damage but only to one lucky customer. He has a crossbow which does damage to all enemies at the same time. He has a noise blaster which turns the enemies the other way and keeps them from attacking until they take a set amount of damage. He has a bioweapon, which is effective against any living creatures (that's pretty inhumane to think about so I didn't really use that). And even more! Other than that, he's king of Figaro so he gives you a discount if you're there and he's the head of your party. He's pretty clever.

Sabin, who I called Banana. (Get it? Because his brother is the Gap and he's the Banana Republic? Haha, yellow hair.) I didn't use him very much because he has this cool power called a "Blitz" where you press the D-pad buttons for certain combinations like a fighting game. The problem is, that most of the time I would use it, it would say "invalid input" despite doing it correctly, a drawback of using an emulator I'm sure. Getting his final blitz is pretty fun though because it's literally just a circle (which the emulator was fine with)

Shadow, who I called Sneak (short for Sneaker kukukuku). And his dog, Interceptor (you don't get to choose his name) but he's a bounty hunter, no more, no less...Ok, for real though, they lead you on to think that and then if you choose to save him, they start showing who's really behind the mask.

Celes. She's probably my favorite, her story is quite involved because she was an imperial (a general at that) who was imprisoned for being a traitor because she questioned Kefka's authority when he poisoned the river. That isn't outright stated but it is the reason, so Locke comes to the rescue before she gets executed. We come to find out that she's a magic user too but she's artificial, she was infused with it. (more on that later) But using that she plays directly into Terra's story and since Locke found her and saved her, he starts to get a bit of a crush.

Setzer, the only character from this game that was in Kingdom Hearts. He's a gambler (and a past Struggle champion, mind you!) but he has an airship and man is that thing fast! I think there's an item you can use to fast travel but I never used it, never really needed to. The only complaint I have about that is that there isn't a tracker (that I know of) so if you wander off, you could lose where you landed it. But Setzer's quite suave, I like his backstory with Darill. He has a slot option which I've seen in some of the other games, it's nothing too drastic but it's alright, I do feel it's more randomized than you actually picking though. Even if he's mainly there just for a means to travel, I couldn't help but like his character and feel like he's a part of the group.

Kefka, the villain. He's not the one that infused Celes with her power but he ordered it so imagine what he's been doing with his other lackeys. To himself. He's an oddball because his laugh is creepy and he does evil stuff but when you fight him, he just sets his minions on you and is actually weak in comparison He runs away despite trying to keep up his ego with some excuse. But they build him up and he gets stronger and eventually you gain control of a character who is quite powerful, they show you this power and how he's stronger than the rest of your team then have Kefka win. That's smart but he's still pretty silly ("But he's a clown!" to which I say "I know this!") But I feel like the ending was kind of sudden, like the build up was there but he didn't really do much other than "be a boss" it was more what he had already done by that point. I guess most of the FF games I've played have done that though for one reason or another.

Strago, who I called Mungo. He has the ability of "Lore" and honestly I don't have a lot to say about him, there isn't much to him and I didn't use him much but I named him! That counts for something! (But I also named Mog "Pog" so...)

Relm, who I called Reij. She's Mungo's granddaughter and an artist, she sketches the picture of whatever's in front of her then copies its ability (similar to Tachi). She's cute but I didn't use her too often either because I found her to be kind of weak. Maybe I just didn't give her the right equipment but she's a nice side character, I liked her role for the boss in Owzer's mansion, pretty cool. (She's also pretty good on enemies that have the "death" ability)