#Annnnd that's about it

[0xeyedaisy]

Random stuff

[popqorn]

Can't stop thinking about this dialogue, during the 100 swords scene:

Compared to this dialogue, when Hua Cheng is gently removing a needle from Xie Lian's foot:

Just, the tenderness of it all, after Xie Lian endured so much pain. The permission to cry out if it hurts, compared to having his voice forcibly muffled. It makes me cry whenever I think about it.

[chasing-faith-and-fate]

Moon 32

Pt 2

Moon 32 p1 | Moon 32 bonus

[abyssboo]

I get really irrationally annoyed whenever someone implies/outright says that Watcher Grian began existing thanks to the life series because. like. i have so many watcher grian stories in my wattpad bookmarks from before life series was a thing. and the ATUS Karma animatic from hc s6 that lives in my head rent free

[keeps-ache]

you'll forget all but what you chose

[night version below: eyestrain warning]

[mswyrr]

more on michelin stars

I genuinely think it's going to be an important plot point in s3 re: why exactly Sydney wants a star and why *one* specifically. I went and researched and discovered something I used in my fic, which is that one Michelin star restaurants are excellent cuisine that normal people can still afford. And that connected, for me, to what Sydney had told Marcus about how going out was so special when she was a kid and she wanted to share that kind of amazing thing with people:

We didn't really like eat out a lot growing up, so when we did, it felt special even if it wasn't.... I wanna cook for people and make them happy and give them the best bacon on Earth (1x08)

I'm so hopeful/convinced that the research they have with, like, Matty (the chef who plays Fak) right there on set, means the writers know that about what one star places can be like. And that it's meant to be part of this - more humane vision of excellence for Sydney, where their spot is AMAZING, but it's not a cruel kitchen culture, it's not only for the rich.

For her, it’s *part* of her vision, where she says: 

“I think this place could be so different from all the other places we've been at. But, in order for that to be true, we need to run things different.“ (1x03)

But Carmy sees a star and all it means (all he’s ever known it to mean) as a repudiation of that kind of humanity. You say the word "star" and immediately Carmy goes "fuck stars" (2x01) as pure self-defense - because stars are just pain and suffering to him. They're NYC chef and everything that mess became.

He's so traumatized by the whole thing he doesn't think to ask the right questions: why do you want one? What is your vision for it? Why do you specifically want *one* instead of two or three? What timeline do you have in mind for getting there and how can we strategize on this together?

Instead, because he wants so desperately to please her, despite that instinctive, self-defensive "fuck stars" he relents and asks - okay, are you sure? Are you positive this is what you want? Really?? It's terrible. It's just dread and fear and throwing up every day before work. You really want me to give you this?

(I’ll give you anything you want)

He never asks the right questions. Just assuming the level of pain which is his only experience of this is what the thing IS--playing into that theme about how people only know what they're taught, only know what they are given, and if we are given pain and patterns of it it is so hard to even imagine things can be different and, when you can imagine it, still so hard to actually get there.

(It’s not a coincidence that the ASL sign is one of the few positive, healthy examples of kitchen culture Carmy witnessed - we only know what we’re taught, and it can be hard work to even figure out what “not shitty” IS let alone doing it)

So he's assuming all of that and it's like - if she's his CDC, does she want him to push her as hard as he was pushed? Push himself that hard again? He doesn't want to do either of those things. But that's all he knows. And she keeps saying this is what she wants. And he wants to give her everything she wants.

(In the same conversation she kept saying yes, this is what I want, she expressed admiration for the designer chef outfit he later buys her as a gift - he wants to give her everything she wants, even when it seems like a terrible idea he’s torn about)

I think this misunderstanding is intentional and it’s going to come out in S3. A one star restaurant fits so perfectly with what we know of Sydney’s goals and love for her work! And Carmy not able to even conceive of something better because of the patterns he’s stuck in and finding his way to her vision makes sense for him.

I think Carmy figuring out how this work can be joyful and humane is going to be a huge part of S3. Sydney not becoming lost in the high stress environment, not following in younger!Carmy's footsteps living a life of pure drive and dread, and Carmy finding that for the first time.

I do think that, given where they both end in 2x10, there’s going to be a period of conflict and a real bunch of issues for both of them - but with themes and ideas like this seeded into the story there’s so many ways to make s3 start out in a bad way and then really end in joy in a beautiful way?

[bathtub4rats]

If I get my autism diagnosis today I will draw 1 riddler of choice

Perhaps in a sexual manner

Perhaps not

Whose to say 😏

[okaratauri]

some SUPER old art I found while deleting photos, enjoy the cringefest

[moonymode]

people will talk about transmasc hcs for sirius and ocassionally, rarely remus which would be cool if it wasn't actually just an excuse to cis woman-ify sirius in the worst possible way. anyway this post isn't actually about that no one like NO ONE talks about transfem remus and i think that's so sad. she's right there like literally....the werewolf symbolism

[veliseraptor]

this feels like a post i've made before but i'm just thinking again about how there was a period of time where i was like "i really enjoy the thematic beats that mxtx seems to be obsessed with and what they say about the world and relationships between people but i feel like sometimes she could stand to be a little more subtle about it, how obvious do you really have to be about 'revenge and violence are bad for everyone and regardless of how 'justified' they may be it only leads to more suffering, only kindness and compassion can make things better'"

only then i come online and apparently it turns out it wasn't obvious enough

[kindahoping4forever]

Just wanted to post a quick note saying today is the 5th anniversary of when I finally went to my first 5SOS show. Every year I think about how wildly different my fandom experience would've been if I'd been able to attend previous tours, how everything aligned just right for me to finally go to MYT, how I almost talked myself out of attending the night before, how completely unrecognizable my life would be today if I hadn't gone. I probably wouldn't have a blog to post this to. You wouldn't know me, I wouldn't know you. I never would've met so many of my friends. I wouldn't have ever met my best friend, the best friend I've ever known. I never would've rediscovered my love for writing. I genuinely don't know how I would be spending my days and I wonder if they would still be filled with the kind of joy I have found here in this community.

It feels fitting that this reflective day coincides with the last show of this tour, a tour that has been powered by appreciation for the bond we share and celebration of the time we've all spent together. Keeping up with this tour has been impossibly fun (and sometimes just plain impossible) and I can't think of a better way to have spent the past three months. I'm happy to have experienced it - and the past 5 years - with this band and with all of you. Thank you to this band, to my friends, to anyone who's ever interacted with me here and most of all, to Past Me for buying those tickets all those years ago. I wouldn't have a place to call home without you. 💙

[enhanced-operatives-division]

Points at you. 10 and/or 11 for starstruck?

Two starstruck asks,,,,,,joy of joys,,

Part of an ask game linked here.

#10. What's an au you have for them?

Since them meeting at all is technically an AU i have 3 different ways that they do meet up. There's the one where Juniper ends up with the agency/adjacent to and ends up working with Reggie (have written a fic with this). The next one is Juniper surviving but basically going stealth and living as normal of a life as he can and ending up meeting Reggie through chance (most recent fic I've written). And then there's my personal favourite where Reginald "You're lucky my tracking skills are still up to snuff" Crane keeping himself busy after Phoenix was MIA and finding Juniper still alive (fic I want to write but haven't started mainly because it may end up multi chapter).

In terms of more AU canon bending taking them and putting them in a completely unrelated situation...I have a guilty pleasure Warrior Cats AU for IEYTD in general. Both JJ and Reggie have perfect warrior cats suffixes in their names already (Juniper and Crane) so they're called Junipersong (charcoal bengal) and Craneflight (tabby Norwegian forest cat). It's very silly but the amount of scenes I have in my mind for it...good lord...

#11. How was their first kiss like?

Augh my friend Imp wrote an absolutely excellent fic about it (tragically in the realm of unfinished Google docs) and I'm shaking their hand about it so hard. Basically Juniper kissing Reggie but he like wasn't ready/fully expecting it and Juniper absolutely panicking because he thinks he's misread every interaction between them both since they got closer. The second one is much sweeter though,,

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

Ghostbur :(

[regular-theodore]

istg I'm enough like my dad without liking Buffy as well

[alatabouleau]

Why the Beach divorce is unfixable (and why it doesn't work in Good Omens 2)

I think we can all agree that XMFC is a ...~flawed~ movie. I mean, I could write long, long posts about the inherent sexism and racist implications. But today, I want to talk about one thing that actually worked. That made so much sense and hit so hard, it single-handedly saved the whole film for me. Something that I've seen come up recently, again, under the cherik-tag because of another fandom and show. Where something very similar happens, only that in this case, it doesn't work at all.

(if you haven't watched GO S2 yet, spoilers. Also, if you enjoyed the second season, good for you, but this post is going to be highly critical of it. Gotta be my last post about that, since I believe in getting it out of your system but not continually spreading negativity and holding a grudge.)

So, with this post, I would like to dissect *why*: What makes the Beach Divorce (TM) in First Class work so well is its preparation in the previous events of that film and even before that. The thing about First Class is, while not being the perfect prequel timeline-wise with the previous motives of the first X-Men-trilogy, it still works *because* it is a prequel. At least the very specific part about Professor X and Magneto. Because from the start, when Charles pulls Erik out of the ocean, we, the informed audience, know how it's going to end. But for some moments you tend to forget, when they go on a trip to recruit mutants, training them, working so well together. And even when the small cracks are already visible in the way they discuss the issue of mutant integration into society, one could still hope that maybe this time, they'll find a way, settle their differences and keep building the future. Together. But it's still the same story. It's still the same characters. And both Erik and Charles could never change their core values. Their lives have already shaped them into who they are inherently, and they can't change what they do because they can't change what they *want*. Which is why the line "We want the same thing." - "Oh, I'm sorry my friend. But we do not." hits so hard. Because both is true. On a broader level, they *do* both want the same thing. A better future for mutantkind. Yet just as equally true is the fact that they will never want to choose the same path to get there.

To point it out directly, what makes the Beach Divorce (TM) so brilliantly devastating is that it makes 100% perfect sense for the two characters to behave that way. It makes sense that Erik, who sees someone he clearly cares for (loves) being shot, again!, can't initially accept that it's his fault. It makes sense for him, after taking an unimaginable amount of courage to make himself vulnerable in front of Charles, for the very first time on screen in front of ANYNONE mind you, laying down awkwardly but raw in its honesty how much this man in his arms means to him, to immediately close off and become cold again after being utterly rejected, in his PoV. It makes just as much sense for Charles who spent this movie trying to show Erik that there could be other ways to deal with issues than violence, would perceive how Erik takes on a helmet that cuts him off, kills a man while Charles is IN HIS HEAD, tries to kill "innocent" people and ultimately, shoots him, to conclude that his friend (love interest) has long since chosen a path where he could never follow him and therefore see choosing different sides (breaking up) as the only available option. And you can try to "fix" this. You can make up any scenario you can think of, and it still would play out like that because you can't change how each Erik and Charles perceive the world without changing inherently who they are as characters. That's what makes it so gut-wrenchingly tragic.

The whole tragedy of the tale of cherik is laid out in this one scene: That if the two of them looked into the mirror of erised, they'd see the same vision. Them being together and leading the mutant race in a bright future for them. But in reality, the means they choose to get to that end will never be compatible. Its tragedy defines itself through a subversion of the trope "Love on opposite sides". Because they *choose* to be that. It's not external circumstances that keep them from being together, it's their own values and convictions. Which is what keeps me so obsessed with these two, since that is so uniquely ~them~. So why do I think that this very similar scene, which I described as so brilliantly heartbreaking in one context, doesn't work for Good Omens 2? well... BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE FOR *THESE* CHARACTERS! Because Crowley and Aziraphale are the exact opposite of Cherik. They too, may be a couple that finds itself on different sides, but in their case, that's entirely an external circumstance, while their internal values and convictions align almost perfectly (depending whether we talk book omens or S1GO). Because the core of Ineffable spouses ship is that they are on the same side when they shouldn't be. They have their orders to obey, they have their instructions to despise each other, but they simply don't care enough since They are more interested in earth (and each other) than their respective head offices. That's what makes them work as friends, as a couple, as a ship. So when season 2 pulled a beach divorce à la Cherik, I was mad and disappointed because for me, it tears apart what their relationship is all about. And I'm ok with that kind of sacrifice when it gives you something valuable narrative-wise, which it didn't. And I have no hope of season 3 paying off for that. There was just not a big enough reason for me to break off the backbone of the entire story. That it is possible for you to make your own choices and be with the people you want to be with even if an oppressive system tells you no. It just doesn't make sense.

(So yeah, does this post only exist because I tried to get my head off from the destruction of a very dear ship of mine but also not wanting to spoil anyone's fun, by scrolling through the cherik-tag on Tumblr instead of the good omens tags and seeing so many posts comparing these two scenes, thinking "can you escape this *anywhere* on this page?" while also getting annoyed since how I pointed out in this post, it doesn't work at all in the second context? Maybe. But that's just me. ;))

[reap-the-game]

Phase out my heart And you will see Slam shut, eyes blank, and repeat I will show you what I can be