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bunnys-beetlejuice-blog · 4 years ago

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obnoxious truck horn noises

FIC UPDATE! COME SEE WHAT THE TEENS ARE GETTIN' INTO TODAY

This is the latest chapter of my long and unwieldy beetlejuice au. Start here to understand all the pointless call backs to my own work that I put in mostly just for myself. This is found family au, and features Beetlejuice being Lydia's big brother and if you like that idea I think you'll end up having a pretty okay time

Really, in his opinion, today has been one of the most fun he’s had in ages. It’s probably because he’s a being of chaos, and it’s been a little too quiet and wholesome around here, lately. Sexy and Babs aren’t exactly thrilled with the turn their day has taken, but man, he treasures it.

Their group punishment is banishment from the library, which he wouldn’t care about, except Adam actually seems devastated. BJ specifically is relegated to picking up trash on his lunch break the next two weeks, and he’s already plotting ways to get around it. But the actual worst thing to happen is after the meeting, when both Adam and Barbara’s parents tell him, very angrily, to stay the hell away from their kids. He makes the choice then that he’s going to get even closer to them, out of spite.

They all have to go shuffling back to class, because it’s still the middle of the day, and he’s worried, for a moment, that his two friends are mad at him, but then they both glance back at him, at nearly the same time. Barbara winks at him, and Adam, holy shit, Adam fucking blows him a kiss, and, sincere or not, and he pulls his hood over his hair because he knows for a fact he’s going pink. He gives them a pathetic waive back. They can be downright flirty, when they feel like it.

Emily pauses beside him. “Should I come to your audition after school?” She asks, and he glances up at her, amber eyes shining from the darkness of his hood. “Sure, but don’t expect nothin’. Probably won’t even get th’ part.” She kisses his head, through the hood. “I doubt that.”

One more gentle pinch to his nose, and Emily takes off down the hall, and he takes himself to class.

There’s a little bit of chatter as he enters the classroom, and he feels an unusual amount of eyes on him, all the breathers seemingly watching him, as he slides into his seat in the back. It’s confusing, and a little worrying, because while he’s been getting more attention, lately, it’s really only been from the drama kids, and Adam and Barbara. He’s not sure what this is about, until one of the girls in front of him turns to face him. He’s shocked, because he can’t remember ever seeing another angle of her, other than the back of her head.

“Did you and Adam really get into a fist fight in the library?” she asks, and from the way the entire classroom goes quiet, they’re all apparently waiting to hear what he’s got to say. He finally pulls his hood off his head, trusting the color has gone back to normal, and stares at her. “What th’ fuck’re you talkin’ about?” He squints, like she’s the weird one, even though, one hundred and ten percent of the time, he’s the weirdest thing in any building he’s ever been in.

“You and Adam got in a fist fight over Barbara,” another kid, to his left, chimes in. “Over Babs?” “You got in a fight, and knocked a bunch of stuff over?”

This seems to be his peers' way of quantifying his weird ass, “kind of something kind of not sure what that something is” relationship with his two friends. Someone there had heard fighting, or at least the sounds of all the books going flying, and had seen them led out, and cobbled together this bullshit.

He grins.

“You got it all wrong,” he says, and for once, all the attention is on him. “Me an’ Adam fist fought th' vice principal.” The bullshit lie he weaves is way more interesting than some love triangle, and it makes the three of them sound very cool, very sexy, very rebellious. He can tell a few of them aren’t buying it, but to be honest, he talks so little that he’s never really lied to these kids, and they have no clue what his personality is like. They’re not sure if they can believe a word out of his mouth, or not. Obviously, they can’t, but he’s grinning and laughing by the end, and a few of them are shaking their heads, but smiling. This is something, something good, even if it won’t last, because for five minutes before class starts, he’s not the weird, lonely kid in the back. He’s just a kid.

The audition doesn’t go nearly as bad as he’s anticipating. Adam had predicted right, there are only a few non club kids there, and the looks on their faces tells him they had no clue he would be here, and are already rethinking their decisions to try and participate. That’s right, losers, he thinks, sending each of them his best slasher smile, in turn. My club now.

Barbara and Adam aren’t officially going out for any parts, seemingly happy to be a part of the ensemble, which makes sense… they’re not really all that interested in the limelight, they want to stand in support. That’s so them, he thinks, smiling and clapping in turn, as each of them give a sample of their singing, mostly a formality. Adam was right, though, Babs can really hit that high note. When his name is called, he feels his gut clench, and thinks he might experience vomiting for the second time in his life, but as he stands up on stage, looking out in the auditorium, he catches sight of Emily, sitting way in the back. She’s laser focused on him. He makes a face at her, wrinkling his nose and sticking out his tongue, ignoring the confusion of the other drama members, and Emily, his mother, his lifeline, from across the rows of seats, returns it.

So he sings.

His voice is scratchy, but that’s what they want, they think it sounds villainous. They're more right than they know. Turns out not needing to breathe really works in your favor with singing, because he can take a huge breath of air and use it all, not needing to hack and sputter or pause for oxygen, but despite not needing to breathe, when he finishes, and stands there, he still feels somehow breathless. It’s more of a metaphor than anything else, but it’s still there. Maybe this is what passion feels like, he thinks, and then takes a little bow, as even the non drama kids clap, because he fucking nailed it.

They’re going to hang up a sheet later, announcing who got what part, but Adam insists he’s a shoe in for this dentist role. “Guess I should actually learn what this play’s about now, huh?” He says, and both his friends give him looks like he’s insane. “There’s a movie.. I think it’s right up your alley,” Babs tells him. “I can’t believe you haven’t seen Little Shop! It’s a cult classic, and it’s got murder, and stuff,” Adam tells him. “Oh, well, why didn’t anyone say so?” There’s a natural lull in the conversation. The three of them are sitting on the edge of the stage with their feet hanging off, himself in the middle, where he prefers to be. He feels Barbara’s arms snake around his own, until she’s got him pressed tight against her, and she rests her head on his shoulder again, like she had in the hallway. Adam takes his hand, and rubs the pad of his thumb over a well earned ukulele inflicted callous. God, Satan, who or whatever, he’s never felt more comfortable.

Adam clears his throat, like he’s mustering up some courage, and then says, “So. Should we.. talk about.. This?” And he gestures to the three of them. “Do we need to?” BJ asks. “It feels nice. Can’t it just be that?” “But.. don’t we need ground rules?” Barbara asks, barely lifting her head from his warm shoulder. “Because this is feeling like something. It is something, right?” Both boys nod in agreement. Certainly feels like something, to him. Something big.

“We could make a list!” Adam enthuses, suddenly, and BJ groans. “It’s absolutely revoltin' how excited you get over your lists and organization. It’s a fetish, isn’t it? It’s a sexual fetish.” “It’s a good idea,” Barbara gently flicks at his ear. “If this is… anything, we should all be on the same page, right? Know what to expect out of each other? Have boundaries?” “You two can do whatever you want to me,” he says with a smile, and it’s not even a joke. “Ravish me. Run me through. Just don’t leave me.” It gets more vulnerable at the end than he means it to. “I think you need to set higher standards for yourself,” is what Adam says, and all he can do is respond lamely, “I’ll hire your standards, Sexy.”

They have to break apart, and stand, because Adam and Barb’s parents will be here soon, and besides, he knows Emily is waiting patiently outside the auditorium for him. But he lifts Adam’s hand to his lips, finally gives him that little kiss they missed out on earlier. Adam goes a very sweet shade of pink, and then looks to Barbara. “His stubble is scratchy,” he confirms, and she takes Adam’s hand from BJ, and kisses it, too. “There. All better.”

The two of them slip their hands into his as they make their way down from the stage, to the auditorium door, and he catches himself starting to float, because he feels light and airy and enamored. He forces his boots back to the ground, tries to remind his body that it needs to respect gravity, and he gives both their hands a squeeze, as they step out from the darkened hall into the light of the outside, like he’s making sure they’re real. They are. Despite his heart still as death in his chest, he’s never felt more alive. this isn't even the whole chapter! There's way, waaaaay more for this update, over HERE on Ao3!

#beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice fic #lydia deetz #emily deetz #beetlejuice #beetlelands fic #goldenrat fic #barbara maitland #adam maitland

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stilesxeveryone · 3 years ago

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The Rewatch, pt4

Feel free to message or comment any of your own thoughts/opinions!

Season 2, episode 7

All adults in the vicinity crossing their arms as soon as Stiles opens his mouth to say something stupid

“No stiles!” Rip all of his Stiles privileges

I have to assume that kanima!Jackson assaulted Allison because Matt is into her, which is a whole new level of creepy because oh god that means Matt can control the kanima more than just “hey kill that guy”, like this suggests it sort of takes on Matt’s emotions and shit

Stiles knows Jackson’s birthday

Uhhhh missed the rest of the episode because I was drawing, whoops

Just Peter traumatising Lydia, it’s fine

Season 2, episode 8

I always love Stiles and his father interacting tbh, they very much know how to deal with each other’s bullshit a lot of the time and I appreciate it. Seeing them work on a case together is wonderful

Again, this scene between Stiles and his dad about him losing his sheriff position is actually heartbreaking, goddamn

Ah, the first hints of Scott/Isaac

Reminder that Jackson is canonically queer

Also yesssssssssss magic Stiles! That’s my boyyyyyy! I need to write witch Stiles again

Stiles being pack mum will continue to always be one of my favourite tropes and this is just reminding me that I want to rewrite my 10 chapter fic about human alpha Stiles

Deaton saying the teenagers are “more capable than you think” is a goddamn terrible take, they need so much help. Like yeah they can get out of this alive, but your job as emissary/mentor/adult/whatever is to help reduce their trauma

Season 2, episode 9

I feel like the only time I ever really see Lydia’s trauma mentioned in fics is like in passing about why she hates Peter, but maybe I just don’t read enough fics about Lydia

Also I don’t mean this in a weird way, but I really like the sound of Lydia’s scream. Sometimes shows just use bad screams and it’s a tragedy, but the scream they use for Lydia is brilliant

“Doesn’t being a part of your pack mean no more secrets” I can’t tell if that’s Scott being hypocritical or manipulative but wow

Even though I don’t like Allison’s mother, it still breaks my heart to see her try to talk to Allison before she takes her own life, and Allison doesn’t know so she just brushes her off

Stiles kept in touch with the drag queens which is actually amazing information

Again! Stiles and his father! Making me cry! I mean this time it’s a hallucination but goddamn

Chris was killing his wife, I was thinking about how strong his forearms looked

I’m really interested to know how in the world Peter knew that Lydia was immune/a banshee, and that she’d be able to bring him back

Season 2, episode 10

Someone needs to explain this part to me. Like I literally don’t understand the order of events of Matt and the kanima bonding and Isaac’s dad dying. Like did Jackson kill him before they bonded, and if so why didn’t he bond with Isaac instead? Or did he somehow bond with Matt before killing Isaac’s dad, even though this flashback clearly shows them bonding after the fact?

Please someone give me an explanation

“Scott I trust” that is such a sad line

Hhhhhhh wish people would stop manipulating Allison, and can we get some better communication over here please!

Okay Stiles’ dad shouting Scott’s name first when he hears a gunshot kinda hurts guys

I do appreciate that this show doesn’t half ass their villain character motivations. Sometimes I see villains and I have literally no idea why they do what they do, but not this guy

Okay clearly this show enjoys killing their villains in the same way twice, like they burned Peter twice, and now they’re drowning Matt twice

Season 2, episode 11

Stiles (Dylan O’Brien) is so pretty (and clearly this cameraman knew it)

Isaac coming into the vet clinic like a lost pup is really adorable, and him crying after taking the dog’s pain away 🥺

Peter you manipulative son of a bitch, stop looking so good

Oh boy Allison going off the rails and hunting Erica and Boyd, I wish she’d go feral in the other direction and shoot Gerard

Stiles winning the game, and having this amazing moment and having something to be proud of, and then immediately getting kidnapped is kinda fucked up and I appreciate it

Season 2, episode 12

As always, give me pack mum Stiles or give me death

And as always, Stiles never shutting his mouth during interrogations and fights is my favourite thing to see. Also would be into a Stargent or Stallison fic where one of them realises Stiles is down in the basement and they step in

Why does Stiles look so good with that blood on his face

And that no one! No one knows! That Gerard beat Stiles up! As far as we see, he doesn’t tell anyone about it!!!

I honestly appreciate that Chris goes to the side of the werewolves before Allison does, I think it’s very fun and cool

And here it is, the moment we’ve all been waiting for. Scott using Derek to kill Gerard. He’s just so uncaring about the fact that he lied to everyone about what was happening, planned to violate Derek’s autonomy and had planned to murder Gerard, like it’s so weird to see him so nonchalant about it

Erica and Boyd just can’t catch a break

I think there are definitely parts of this season that I enjoy more than the first, and parts I enjoy less. I love the characters they introduce (Isaac, Erica and Boyd) and I love the exploration of Allison’s character, and Stiles’ relationship with his dad. I hate Gerard (which is a good thing), and god bless Chris coming round to the winning side (even though technically he went through this same thing last season, of realising his family member must be stopped before his daughter gets hurt).

I do wish the ending was different, and that Scott went about defeating Gerard in a different way. Or at least for him to show any empathy? He just feels so callous and uncaring as he uses Derek and as Gerard dies and I don’t know if it’s bad acting or bad writing or maybe even my misunderstanding of his character, but I feel like that just doesn’t fit him.

Also maybe this is just me, but I kinda wish that Matt wasn’t major stalking Allison. It feels a little like an unnecessary cherry on top, or maybe I’m just not thinking hard enough about what it added to the season.

#the rewatch #alex rewatches teen wolf #teen wolf

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maddie-grove · 4 years ago

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I’ve spoken before about how Henry Crawford in the 1999 movie version of Mansfield Park is a completely different character than the one in the novel—a “bad boy” with some destructively impulsive tendencies but also great reserves of kindness and self-awareness, rather than a callous and hypocritical bad man—but I have to say that neither the 1995 nor the 2005 version of Pride and Prejudice gets Mr. Collins right, either. In the 1995 miniseries, he’s too broad and earthy: always leering and smirking and smacking his lips. He seems like he’s waiting for the first opportunity to kick Lady Catherine de Bourgh to the curb and then head to a combination brothel/all-you-can-eat roast chicken buffet for an entire week (those existed in the Regency, right?). In the 2005 movie, an adaptation that softens many of the characters, he’s very awkward but never malicious; he seems to have learned manners out of a not-very-good book, but his motives for learning them are probably good. He appears genuinely intimidated by Lady Catherine. He often looks embarrassed, and he’s almost sweet.

I’m not against these adaptations; the 1995 Mr. Collins works because he’s funny, and the 2005 one is interesting even though he creates some thematic messiness. (Lizzie and Charlotte each have understandable, serious, character-specific reasons for responding to Mr. Collins as they do, and Lizzie’s side of things gets short shrift if all Mr. Collins’s faults are surface-level.) But, taken together, I think these versions have contributed to the idea in Austen fandom that the original Mr. Collins is an okay guy who just happens to be awkward and insecure. And if that’s the direction someone wants to take for their adaptation or fanfic, that’s cool, but he is actually small-minded and mean-spirited in the novel. Not in a way that’s socially unacceptable for someone in his position at that time, but a lot of things were socially acceptable back then; that doesn’t make him any more pleasant.

First, his proposal to Lizzie shows that he absolutely shouldn’t marry her; he disapproves of her personality and is disappointed by her lack of wealth, even as he hopes her limited means will induce her to marry him. If he’s proposing to her out of a sense of charity, he should be kinder; if he has serious misgivings about her suitability as a clergyman’s wife but is choosing to overlook them because she’s hot, he should be less foolish; if he thinks he can’t do better than his cousin and he resents it, he needs to get over it.

Second, after he proposes to Charlotte, he’s always trying to rub it in Lizzie’s face. It’s understandable that his feelings would be hurt (although he could’ve saved himself some heartbreak by listening to her initial no), but she’s, you know, allowed to say no, and he found a much more suitable wife within a couple days, so he has little reason to complain. It’s unpleasant to Lizzie and insulting to Charlotte.

Third, his gloating, pitiless words to the Bennetts after Lydia runs away with Wickham may reflect a socially acceptable sentiment for the time (that it would be better for Lydia to have died than to become a fallen woman and shame her family), but this is the cruelest thing that anyone says about Lydia; I don’t think even Lady Catherine goes that far. This is especially alarming in light of his profession; the damage that such a rigid, unforgiving, probably resentful clergyman could do is worrying. He also tells Lady Catherine when people don’t generally know what happened with Lydia, a betrayal of trust borne either of astounding stupidity or spite.

Tl;dr: Mr. Collins is a bad guy. He’s basically Mr. Brocklehurst from Jane Eyre, just from the point of view of someone who isn’t directly under his power.

#pride and prejudice #jane austen

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rejectclone · 4 years ago

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I’ve been meaning to update the mini bios for my OCs, it took me some time to try to condense their core aspects and backstory stuff into smaller paragraphs but I’m finally done!

NAME: Jared Clements

AGE: 28

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Bisexual

RACE: White (is of Hispanic descent)

OCCUPATION: Detective/Deputy

ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Good

SHORT BIO: Who was once one of the greatest detectives in Neo York City’s police branches, now a shattered former shell of himself after the Incident. Physically and emotionally mauled from the explosion that killed his partners and his reputation, he now ruminates at the station, plotting for his revenge against the criminal organization that led to his fall. Formerly known to be the most kind and upbeat member of the station, he has become cold and callous to everyone, but the new recruit might pull him from his self-imposed darkness.....

NAME: Devon Cox

AGE: 25

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Straight

RACE: ‘White’/Ambiguous (HEAVILY mixed, but he identifies mostly with being Italian)

OCCUPATION: Trainee Officer, former illegal bloodsport boxer

ALIGNMENT: Neutral Good

SHORT BIO: The bastard son of a seedy bookie and a mother who clearly did not take good care of herself, along with being the only mute member of his family, he was deemed a unwanted child. Eventually, his parent’s actions caught up to them one night out, and as they were slaughtered, their son was left alone at home. Soon adopted by his uncle on his father’s side, he was essentially forced to ‘repay the debt’ by becoming a bloodsport fighter, regardless if he wanted to do it or not. As a adult, the illegal ring has fallen due to on-going corruption, he is now again left alone as his corrupt uncle got hauled off to prison. Left to his own devices and lamenting his actions, he now wants to pave his own path by repaying his own debts by joining the NYPD. Unknown to his new coworkers, he has spilled blood numerous times and won’t hesitate to do what must be done in some situations.....

NAME: B055 M4N

AGE: 24 in 4027 (BEFORE DEATH) 80 in 4083 (POST RESURRECTION)

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Straight

RACE: White

OCCUPATION: Lieutenant

ALIGNMENT: Lawful Neutral

SHORT BIO: He was supposed to be the next gleaming star in the NYPD’s legacy of lieutenants, all from the same bloodline spanning across decades...... until he was assassinated at his induction ceremony in front of the general public. Ironically, his fate was not sealed there, as a week before his induction, he was coaxed into signing up for a ‘organ donation program’, to a incredibly specific experimental medicine company. He never expected his corpse to be used in a unethical program to create a supercomputer, devised of a human consciousness instead of a AI, to ensure that it will have a good stance on logical proceedings of organization and the law, and will not suffer from conflicts of interest. Unfortunately for him, the total conversion to a machine was semi-successful, as they could only resurrect his head...... Now doomed to be a severed head in a jar filled with PFC and the inability to speak (well, at least without using text-to-speech), he has been forcibly instated to be the permanent boss of the station. His true appearance is a facade to essentially everyone, as the ‘higher-ups’ creates false non-existent lieutenants to be instated every few years to keep the act going, except a very select few know of his current situation.

NAME: Lydia Hall

AGE: 25

GENDER: Female

SEXUALITY: Lesbian

RACE: White

OCCUPATION: Psychiatrist, uses ‘personal nurse’ as a cover

ALIGNMENT: True Neutral

BIO: She is considered to be one of the ‘greatest’ newer psychiatrists to ever grace the continental US, but nobody expected her to suddenly disappear off the face of the earth, upon getting a ‘promotion’ one day. Unknown to almost everyone, she was coerced into the psychological monitoring of one of the company’s most experimental projects, the undead severed head turned database at the local NYPD station. His previous care taker had to be laid off due to ‘concerns’, and thus she now must monitor him on a near daily basis, cleaning out his tank, making sure he is still sane, and to just stay there to entertain him basically. She never expected her career to be basically reduced to a personal nurse, and yet here she is. Unfortunately for her, the true nightmare unfolds when a certain hazmat wearing being stumbles into the picture.

NAME: Lawrence Grey

AGE: 47

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Straight

RACE: White

OCCUPATION: Geneticist

ALIGNMENT: Neutral Evil

BIO: A famed scientist who has been working for ages for a experimental medicine company. He was renown for his research in advancing certain projects, some more well received than others however. A overall stoic man, his coworkers reluctantly follow his command, never fully knowing what he thinks of them. Dedicated to his work, the higher-ups gave him access to a incredibly hidden cloning program, regardless if he wanted to work there or not. Not wanting to bond to his ‘projects’, he continued his intimidating aura, until one of them in particular piqued his interest. It would have been better if the clone never showed any promise however, as the impeding transport to another lab will lead to his escape, and his ‘father’s’ coma.....

NAME: [REDACTED]

AGE: [REDACTED]

GENDER: [REDACTED]

SEXUALITY: [REDACTED]

RACE: [REDACTED]

OCCUPATION: [REDACTED]

ALIGNMENT: [REDACTED]

BIO: ……………… he wasn’t meant for this world. The forced byproduct of a illegal cloning procedure, made to be a rejected failure on purpose. As for why? The higher-ups of the organization believed that the more malformed and sickly the clones are, the higher the chance they might carry new genes that can cure said sicknesses. The #439th clone to be made, he seemed to be another waste of flesh and blood. If it wasn’t for his ‘caretaker’, he would’ve been euthanized after a month. Desperate to ‘spare’ this subject, the caretaker demanded him to be transferred to another laboratory base, as rumors began to spread that the project has been leaked to shareholders. That fateful night, he was given a technologically advanced hazmat suit to conceal his inhuman appearance, and was shipped off to his new ‘home’. Alas, as fate would have it, the hovervan he was in along with his ‘father’, crashed, leaving him to wonder aimlessly in the pouring rain, hiding in a alleyway until he was spotted by two odd looking officers, trying to close-off the crash site. He was taken in to the station, where somebody claimed it was his ‘son’. Taken up to the lieutenant’s office, much to the confusion of many, this clone will blend into daily happenings of the station.

NAME: Ren Nakamura

AGE: 22

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Robosexual

RACE: Japanese

OCCUPATION: Future heir to the head of a crime syndicate, doubles as a criminal lawyer as a cover

ALIGNMENT: Lawful Neutral/Evil

BIO: The next in line to his family’s criminal syndicate legacy, he is reluctant at first, but must come to terms to what he must do. Raised up to be cold and unrelenting towards his underlings and other syndicate bosses, he will never back down from a fight, always striving to be on top. However, nobody really expected him to come up with a plan to undermine other syndicates, by actually studying criminal law and becoming a legitimate defense attorney in order to coax his clients into exposing future plans (in which he will immediately inform his father of...). Recently he was assigned a personal body guard, who has a ‘unique’ physical composition and will surely make a great hitman. The two of them go along quite well, considering their popular opposites in personality.

NAME: Deangelo Moore

AGE: 25

GENDER: MALE

SEXUALITY: Gay

RACE: German-American

OCCUPATION: Cybernetic hitman, uses ‘criminal lawyer’ as a cover

ALIGNMENT: Lawful Evil

SHORT BIO: Neither fully man nor machine, this once respected art dealer has gone fully into the seedy underbelly of Neo York. As a escapee convict test subject from a experimental ‘liquid metal’ cyborg program, he is a con man on the run, until as fate would have it, he was accepted as a personal ‘body guard’ for one of his former clients’s son. With no real home to go to anymore as his public reputation has been disgraced, he now gleefully takes in stride that he is a ‘ghost’ among the populous, a potentially unstoppable killing machine who is only curbed by his greed and urge to be respected by other powerful beings. His former life now gone, he now works for his employer as if they were blood relatives, and even agreed to do a surreal operation, to directly siphon information from other rival ‘organizations’ by acting.........as public criminal lawyers who defend them..........

NAME: ‘John’ (he was never properly named by any of the scientists, so he named himself. His ACTUAL name is Specimen - 1257)

AGE: 21

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Straight, but questioning

RACE: Literally nothing

OCCUPATION: Chemist, radiobiologist

ALIGNMENT: True Neutral

BIO: After two nuclear wars ravaged the Earth, odd things will happen to all sorts of life. This is one of them, a human who has the unfortunate pleasure of having their physical composition be mainly nuclear radiation. Much about his early past is kept under wraps by the US government, who sent him away as a infant to a remote chemical research base in Alaska, in fear of him being the next nuclear detonation. Left without proper social interaction and is just seen as a genetic anomaly, it left him with a warped view of life. With incredibly poor socialization skills but a surprisingly large scientific intellect, he has been reduced to hidden-away lab worker, who’s aware of essentially being a captive but is shocking content with it. After all, if he were to be released, the genral public wouldn’t take too kindly to a mannequin-like being with stark white skin and exposed green goo leaking out of his facial orifices, with a near constant glowing aura.

NAME: ‘Mark’ (he was never properly named, and this is just a name given to him by ‘John’. His ACTUAL name is Specimen 1258)

AGE: 21

GENDER: Male

SEXUALITY: Literally doesn’t care at all

RACE: Literally Nothing

OCCUPATION: Convict, former hitman

ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Evil

BIO: What’s more strange than one severely irradiated human being with physical nuclear radiation as flesh and blood? His red colored doppelgänger. With a past even more shrouded in mystery, this ‘man’ seems to originate from the wastes, the former parts of the US that were scarred from the previous two wars. Claiming to be the next step in human evolution, he is incredibly cruel and harsh, and when introducing himself to the criminal underworld as the ‘best’ hitman, he was severely feared by many. Even other rival hitmen who genetically or cybernetically augmented themselves saw him as a legitimate threat to themselves, as after all, he’s a actual living biohazard. They all chipped in together to pin him against who they believe is true my IMMUNE to him, another ungodly hitman with a liquid metal composition. The plan worked, as letting him just step foot into NYC triggered radiation alarms, thus exposing him to the government for the very first time. After a short stint at a supermax prison, he was given a deal: stop irradiating the guards and convicts, and we’ll move you to a more private place where you can do basically almost anything you want. The place in question? A remote research base in Alaska.....

#also I’m now making sideblog for all of this stuff now!!#my ocs #jared clements #devon cox #B055 M4N #lydia hall #lawrence grey #[REDACTED]#ren nakamura #deangelo moore #‘john’#‘mark’#vinyl scratching

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twdmusicboxmystery · 5 years ago

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10x02: We Are The End of the World - First Thoughts

Okay, how did everyone like the episode. I thought it was stellar, to be honest. I know not everyone was excited for this episode because it’s a bottle episode about Alpha and Beta, but me and my fellow theorists fully expected to get a lot of interesting symbolism and foreshadow, and we were not disappointed!

***As always, spoilers abound for episode 10x02 below. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

Opening Sequence:

I firmly believe the opening sequence represents what happened to Beth after Coda. I kind of suspected it would anyway because sneak peek, we saw Alpha and Lydia run into a hospital. Watching the entire thing confirmed it. It starts with a woman who is passed out in her car. It appears she's gotten into an accident. When we first see her, she's laying against the steering wheel with horn blaring and the airbag deployed. But she's not dead.

She wakes up and tries to get out of the car. The sound of the crash and the blare of the horn have brought walkers down on her. She tries to get out and away before the walkers surround her. She tries to get out her door but can’t, which I thought was kind of interesting. She slides over and exits the passenger side, diving under the car, but doesn't make it. A walker grabs her leg and bites it and proceeds to eat her.

Alpha and Lydia are nearby and Lydia's earmuffs get knock off. She hears a woman screaming and start screaming herself. That brings the walkers down on them and they have to run. They end up running into the hospital.

I think this represents Beth waking up in the car, being surrounded by walkers, and getting out. She probably crawls under the car for some reason. (It actually reminded me a lot of when Aaron and Daryl did this in 5x16 to get away from the Wolf trap.) And then eventually she makes her way back into the hospital (Grady).

Other evidence of this? Alpha and Lydia pass a fire lane sign. That's a reference to the fire truck. Only firetrucks can park in fire lane. The last time we saw the fire truck was at Grady.

Just before they get inside at the admittance door, they pass a sign that says, "Second lives." Yeah, that's pretty on-the-nose. After all, Beth's "second life," would have begun the moment she woke up in that car where TF left her and made her way back into the hospital.

From there, it's hard to know how to interpret Alpha meeting Beta, or how to apply that to Beth. When Beth goes back into Grady, will she meet someone who will become a good friend and always stay with her or travel with her after that? Maybe. Maybe Edwards could fulfill that role. Or maybe it will be a new character we didn't actually meet in S5.

It's also possible there will be no such thing. Maybe the opening sequence was about Beth, but after that, this just becomes about Alpha and the parallels diverge. No way to tell yet.

Sibling parallels and anti-parallels:

After the opening sequence, we get some interesting stories going on. Alpha stays in the hospital with Lydia for one night and gets to know Beta little bit better.

She finds a picture of him and another man who's wearing the smiley face shirt in the place where he stays. A walker wearing that same shirt comes out and Alpha kills him. It's also obvious that this man, whoever he was, meant a lot to Beta. So, I figure this man must have either been his brother, his best friend, or possibly his boyfriend.

For various reasons, I don't think Beta is gay. I’ll get into why in just a second. But my guess would be that this was his brother. Why? Mostly because the parallel story in the present-day (non-flashbacks) was about two sisters. So, it makes sense for the story in the past to be about two brothers. And of course it doesn't have to be his biological brother. After all, Rick and Daryl are "brothers." But either way, it's a man he cared a great deal about. So, I’ll first talk about Beta’s story and then we'll talk about the two sisters. There was just so much in this episode. It was hard for me to decide how to break down my discussions.

Beta:

If I'm right that Beta lost his brother, then he and his brother must have stayed in the hospital but at some point, but his brother died. We don't know how. From what I could tell, he was keeping his brother locked in a room as a walker, because he couldn't bring himself to kill him. Lydia let the walker out and Alpha ended up stabbing it in the head. Then she invited Beta to come with them, into the darkness, as a Whisperer.

Now, I said earlier that there were several different interpretations of this. On the one hand, I said last season I believed Alpha and Beta represented Beth and Daryl, only were anti-parallels. In other words, these are evil versions of it of Beth and Daryl. This episode confirm it for me more than ever.

So, the first way to interpret this would be as a parallel to Daryl and Merle. Because Daryl lost his brother and saw him become a walker as well. Similarly, Daryl didn't want to leave his brother. Back in S3, he left the prison with for a time before returning, and refused to let Merle go off on his own. He campaigned to let Merle stay at the prison for that very reason. So, he did not want to leave his brother either. The big difference is that when Daryl saw that Merle had become a walker, he immediately put him down and mourned him.

Beta let his brother keep running around as a walker, did not put him down, and we didn't see any tears from him over the death. (Not crying was a big theme in this episode. I'll come back to it.)

The second way I think you could interpret this is the way I've always interpreted the Lizzie/Mika situation. Which is that it represents the stronger half and the weaker half of one person. The weaker half (Mika) dies while the stronger but often more twisted half (Lizzie) lives on. Well, that makes it sound like Beth really is dead because she was always the happy, hopeful one.

But the one who lives doesn’t always HAVE to be twisted either. If you compare this to Daryl and Merle, Daryl lived on because he genuinely was the stronger one, but he's obviously not twisted. He was the good one between the two, so the Lizzie situation doesn't always hold true. But we've seen several pairings with the good one died and the twisted one lived on. (I.e. Lizzie and Mika, Beta and this guy, and the other pair of sisters we see in this episode.)

A third way to interpret this can be as parallels to Daryl leaving Beth behind. Not all the circumstances in this situation match, but we have this person Beta cared about being struck in the head while in the hospital, have him going down right in front of Beta, and then talk of leaving him behind. So there are definitely callbacks to Grady and Coda going on here.

The two sisters:

These two sisters are never named. They even call each other sister. As I watched, I tried to figure out how we should interpret this. Perhaps the most obvious would be the sibling parallel. To Maggie and Beth. I do believe there is something to that because the sister who gave birth to a baby that Alpha made her leave behind definitely had parallels to Beth. Let me show you.

You can see that she is sweet and missing her child. She's obviously not as callous as many of the other Whisperers. But there were more specific things that reminded me of Beth.

For one thing, there's a part where she's and her sister are lying on the ground, trying to sleep. She's lying on some sort of light animal skin. I honestly can't tell what it is because it's just a pelt and we can't see we can't discern what kind of animal it came from. It occurred to me it could be a dog skin. Granted, it could also be a white wolf skin. No way to tell. But the thing that really floored me was that there's a part where, talking to her sister, she says, "I'm so sorry." I think rewound that three times to listen to it because something about bothered me.

Finally, I figured out what it was. Beth says that exact thing to Joan when she wakes up in the hospital without an arm. "I'm so sorry." But it wasn't just the words that are the same. By itself, I probably wouldn't have remembered that line from Beth in Slabtown. It's the actual sound of her voice. This woman has a small, timid, high-pitched voice that sounds exactly like Emily's. Try to listen to the two side by side if you can. They sound like the same person!

Now, with that being said, the other sister would represent Maggie. And as with Alpha and Beta paralleling Beth and Daryl, this is definitely an antiparallel. The sister says, “I should have left you behind when I had the chance.” She later sacrifices her sister in favor of Alpha. Obviously, Maggie would never have done that. So once again, we have this being an anti-parallel to TF and their values.

As with the Beta situation, this could also be construed as the weaker half dying where the stronger, more twisted half lives.

It even occurred to me that if you wanted to compare this to Lizzie and Mika (these two sisters are kind of grown-up versions of Lizzie and Mika) his shows how Alpha is also an anti-parallel to Carol. Because when Lizzie killed her sister, Carol recognized how evil it was. She even went as far as to kill Lizzie to keep her from doing that to anyone else. Here, Alpha actually praises the sister and rewards her for killing her sister. Yeah, definitely twisted.

And again, this can obviously be interpreted in terms of Beth, because we have a situation where the sisters are together and surrounded by walkers. The older sister sacrifices the younger (remember fathers Gabriel's words in 5x16, "you sacrificed one of your own,") and then leaves her behind. Again, this is not the same way it went down with TF and Beth, but this is just the evil version versus the good version.

Okay, a couple more things. I was very interested in the part where Alpha and Beta mentioned their “mission.”

One who has followed me for very long remember this, but I did a post about the Wolves’ religion back in S6. It’s obvious that the wolves were a foreshadow of the Whisperers. Not only do they call themselves a pack several times in this episode, but I'm getting the feeling that they believe much with the Wolves believed.

Back in S6, I did a post on the religion of the wolves. One of them, who talked to Morgan, said that they were freeing the people the killed. It almost felt like they saw killing human beings as freeing them so that they could enter a higher plane of existence or something. And of course, when people die, they become walkers. So it felt like they were very pro-walker and anti-human.

We also saw them gathering armies of walkers which they used in their traps, one of which Daryl and Aaron accidentally tripped in 5x16.

Again, we’re seeing the exact same thing with the Whisperers. At the beginning, Alpha and Beta talk about it together, saying, "Have you forgotten our mission?" We don't actually know what their mission statement is yet, but there are gathering walkers who they refer to as guardians. We also learn in this episode that Beta is very pro-walker. He actually likes the sound the dead make. It's the only song he doesn't want to hear end. That's very telling. No wonder he was drawn too Alpha walking among the dead. It's not just a survival thing for him. He actually enjoys it.

Meanwhile, Alpha also talked about how the dead are free because they love nothing and fear nothing. They only want to feed. That parallels what the Wolf told Morgan about being free. So I kind of feel like they want to turn the entire world into walkers. They definitely seem more pro-walker than pro-human. Just kind of interesting.

Because I said I come back to it, let's talk for a minute about the tears. Last season, we saw Alpha kill someone because he saw her crying. Because she wants to be strong for her and lead her pack, she says she doesn't cry. That, of course, parallels strongly with Beth saying she doesn't cry anymore.

We saw a lot more of that theme this episode. The two sisters talked about how Alpha didn't cry. Even when she left Lydia and thereby lost her daughter, she didn't cry. (By the way, it seems she told the Whisperers, including Beta, that she killed Lydia, which is untrue.) The two sisters talk about wanting to be strong and not cry in the same way as Alpha. And at the end, when one sister sacrifices the other, she doesn't cry at all. (Another anti-parallel between her and Maggie.)

It's more subtle, but I also noticed that when Beta lost the man with the smiley face shirt, he didn't cry either.

Obviously, seeing TF mourned for those they love, seeing Daryl cry for Merle and Beth and Rick, seeing Carol cry when she had to put down Lizzie and Mika, etc., is very important. It's the tears that make them human and make them the good guys. Only the bad guys don't cry for the ones they lose.

Also, notice how Alpha is full of crap. She says she doesn't cry, and that Lydia was dead to her a long time ago. Yet, she's keeping a shrine to Lydia and she cries and misses her.

I also see this as yet another parallel to Beth. At the beginning of S4, she told Daryl she doesn’t cry anymore, which was kind of crap. She tried not to cry and thought that made her strong, but it was a misconception on her part. She kind of abandoned it when the prison fell (she cried in Inmates) and especially after Still when Daryl razzed her about not crying for her dead boyfriends. I think she had to learn the value of mourning. And she did.

So, in a lot of ways, Gamma is actually more psychopathic than Alpha, because she genuinely doesn't cry and has made herself hard to the point of not being human. Alpha pretends to be that way, but it's all a ruse.

Oh, I also said I’d come back to why Beta is not gay. Because he and Alpha entwined fingers at the end. I don’t know if they actually have a physical relationship. They haven’t shown us a sexual element between these two, so they truly may not. But I think they are supposed to be emotionally romantic soul mates. Hence the entwined fingers. So I don’t think the guy Beta lost was his boyfriend.

I’ll go into this more tomorrow in my Details post, but I feel like this was Alpha and Beta’s Still episode. They met, got to know one another, and forged a deep (albeit twisted) connection. More on that tomorrow.

I think I'll end there today. Those were the biggest takeaways for me. There are a lot of references in this episode that I need to touch on tomorrow. Alpha and Beta got a lot of Beth and Daryl’s dialogue here, and how the sisters parallel Beth as well. Stay tuned.

Thoughts?

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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rcvelers · 6 years ago

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hi, & welcome ! so, paige is a muse i’ve had since i was like 16, so she’s seen many verses and faces over the years, but i missed her and wrote a bio for her in this setting, so i thought i’d test the waters. she has a BIO, STATS, & a PINTEREST, but all her good intro stuff is under the cut. like this to plot or message me if any of the wanted connections grabs your interest.

(sydney sweeney, cisfemale) PAIGE BRADLEY, the REVELER, is TWENTY and a JUNIOR. SHE is majoring in GRAPHIC DESIGN. They are not part of the Imperium Society and from the outside, they think it’s FULL OF ASSHOLES. I often see them around campus PISSING OFF THE ADMINISTRATION. They remind me of CHERRY CHAPSTICK, A BLUNT BEHIND HER EAR, SKINNED KNEES, AND SHARPIE MARKER GRAFFITI ON THE DESKS. (kati)

TL;DR

ok, paige has big chaotic gay energy and this VINE is her

essentially, paige grew up in the USA until she reached high school when her mom moved to edinburgh for a job – a job teaching philosophy and sociology at ashcroft university

her dad is a police commissioner so she’s really In It with all of this ashcroft drama

but she grew up in small town USA and despite her parents being strict rule-followers, she was really the opposite? she went through babysitters faster than underwear (is that a real saying?), caused trouble in class, but was always just a little too smart to get caught – her primo move is pinning the blame on someone else

she’s the sort of person who always has a lot of friends because she’s a lot of fun but they never really stick around for long because no one likes being manipulated into trouble all the time

paige sort of just lives to have a good time, fuck the consequences, which is a tiring way to live, so she really doesn’t give a fuck about a lot?

she really didn’t plan to go to college and she was going to travel all over europe until there was an incident at her high school – she essentially sold a freshman drugs and he had an overdose

her parents helped her get out of trouble but in return, she had to go to COLLEGE, at the school where her mom teaches – ashcroft. she doesn’t really fit in too well with a lot of the other kids because she’s not “posh” and doesn’t really care about school that much.

how does imperium come into the mix? well, paige does a lot of things to amuse herself, and imperium caught her interest. she was bored, so one day she tried to join. this came in the form of BLACKMAILING warren on some old shit he did so she could come hang out with the society.

honestly, she didn’t really fit in with them and they bored her after a while – at least, that’s what she says when people ask why she left. but, there was someone there that she had a really genuine connection with, perhaps her first and only real relationship, and she doesn’t want to deal with being in the same room with them and their friends every damn day.

she was really close with lydia, they were sleeping together, but she believes lydia is fine.

HEADCANONS

she’s a graphic design major and her art is really stylized and graffiti-esque. she tends to draw all over campus and always has sharpies with her, you can see her doodles everywhere. she also makes stickers handmade, which she sells but also pastes around campus.

her sexuality is really undefined and i think she just doesn’t care enough to define it? like, she’ll be attracted to whoever she’s attracted to and she’d like to leave it at that.

SHE CANNOT DRIVE. however, she does all the time. she does not have any sort or license or skill, but she loves to get behind the wheel of anything.

always has a broken bone or scraped up something. she’s a huge klutz and a bit of a ditz, but it’s mainly because she doesn’t care enough to be anything else.

can be super insensitive and callous, mostly because she doesn’t think about the fact that other people have feelings? even with her own shit, so she’s definitely said things about quentin that rubbed people the wrong way.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

The Ex: this character is in the society and paige’s only real relationship – they were probably very close and paige fell HARD. things went sour for whatever reason – maybe paige’s inexperience in relationships or nervousness to commit (she could’ve done a number of shitty things to them), but she quit the society because of them

opposites attract friends: like, a really cute friendship where paige is crazy and untamed and this friend is a real rule follower, but somehow they compliment each other? they reign paige in and she gets them out of their shell.

partners in crime: these two are TROUBLE together, always fucking off and having fun, and whenever people see them together they know to run probably

friends with benefits: idk, they’re fucking just for fun. most of paige’s sexual relationships are like this because um, she’s never going to commit to anyone and she just wants to have a good time. this could be with someone as chaotic as her or with someone who’s really different than her.

an almost? will-they, won’t-they?: there’s definitely feelings there, but paige’s always been too flighty, unwilling to be tied down, or maybe the timing’s just always been wrong so nothing’s ever happened between them. they’re probably really flirty and cute, they’re probably good friends too, maybe paige has even made other relationships difficult for them bc their s/os always get jealous.

a project: someone paige is desperate to see loosen up and have a good time, so she’s trying to entice them out of their shell. probably someone paige wants to eventually use in some of her schemes but...she also just wants to see them smile and live a little.

friendship that went sour: paige used them for one of her pranks and threw them under the bus afterward. they realized how little they really meant to her and there was a fight and a fallout. now, they HATE paige, but paige probably doesn’t really care?

someone scorned: paige probably slept with their partner and ruined a relationship, so they hate her. or, maybe they slept with paige and ruined their relationship FOR her only to find out that she was pretty disinterested in committing to anything.

also down for childhood friends, crushes, squad, smoking buddies/detention buddies, roommates, whatever else we can drum up.

#class:intro

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tesbloodline · 6 years ago

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From Out of the Flames

So I should maybe mention that I’m a creative writing major? I love writing all of these little drabbles. I have a couple ideas that I keep meaning to write - the first draft of this one was actually the oldest draft on this blog. :)

Anyway, this one is immediately post-Forgotten City. I’ve gone through about four drafts of how Meri takes it, and they seem to get more and more dramatic. And Meri finally develops a bit of sympathy for mortals other than her minions! It’s about time.

Words: 1,768

When Meri steps off of the lift with the man she was sent to retrieve, Marcurio knows something is very, very wrong at the first glance. She looks different. She is dressed in her full Dark Brotherhood leathers - a choice he still struggles to make peace with, but there in the sanctuary is the most peaceful she’s ever looked - with her favorite knives on her belt. That isn’t unusual, though she had entered the city in her mix-and-match “don’t pay attention to me” armor - something must have come up to convince her “Dark Brotherhood Assassin” was more pertinent than “Wandering Adventurer”.

No, the real problems are thus: her hair, her eyes, her face. Her hair is dirty and dusty, and pulled into a messy ponytail - her hair drapes below her shoulders, though when she went in an hour ago it brushed the nape of her neck when bound up. Her eyes are dull and flat, exhausted - more weary and lost than he has ever, ever, seen them - and yet never still, always darting from one place to the next in search of threats. Her face, upon closer inspection, is what gives him most pause; she bears three new scars, long and curved and fully healed. Somehow, though the method is beyond him, it has been more than an hour for her.

He glances around at the rest of the party, but it seems no-one else has reached the same conclusion despite noticing all the same details. Oh well. He can tell them later. For now, he watches Meri as the children crowd around her. She hugs each of them, too tight, for too long, and when her arms are empty her hands twitch as she tries not to gather them up again. All she says is, “Missed you, ducklings,” in a weary voice.

Meri endures Cassia’s thanks - and the look on her face says endure is the correct word. Then they leave, and Meri seems glad to put the hidden city to her back.

When they make camp for the evening, Meri sits at the very edge of the ring of light, her back to the fire, and will not be coaxed closer or turned around. They eat quickly, the children eager for sleep and Marcurio eager for an opportunity to speak to Meri alone.

When everyone is finished eating and the dishes are all gathered, water above the fire to boil, Lydia gathers the children and puts them to bed, promising a story. When she is done, she will clean the dishes. Meri normally handles the children, but they all know that she is in no state for it tonight - she has not moved from the edge of camp. Stenvar stands to take watch - he always takes the first shift.

With everyone else occupied, Marcurio takes the opportunity to approach his small employer. “Meri?”

Her entire body tenses - quite a feat, seeing how tense she already was. “Hey, Sparky.” Her voice is even, flat, empty.

He steps around her until he can see her face, but she will not meet his eyes. Something deep inside his chest burns, with pain or anger or both he cannot tell. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

That burning thing inside him snaps, and he is moving. He grabs her arm, yanks her from the ground, and drags her away from the camp. As they pass Stenvar, the man rolls his eyes at them and shoves a torch into Marcurio’s hand. Behind them, Lydia soothes the startled children, then resumes her story.

Meri protests, but there’s life in her voice for the first time since she returned from that cursed city, so he does not stop. Let her be furious with him - it is better than this silent hollowness. When they are out of earshot of camp, he releases her. “What’s wrong, Meri? Don’t lie to me.”

She freezes, hand half raised to shove him back, and tears well up in her eyes. She is focused on his face, head turned from the torch. For a long moment, she is still and silent, and then she begins to tremble. Tears pour down her cheeks unhindered and her breath comes in tiny, faltering gasps.

He props the torch against a rock and raises his hands, uncertain of what to do, but before he can make up his mind Meri slams into him with enough force to send them both to the ground. She clings to him, shaking violently and sobbing.

“Meri, what happened down there? Did someone hurt you?” He doubts it - she’s never been hurt before - but he has to ask.

She shakes her head against his shoulder, trying and failing to gather enough breath to speak.

“It was a time loop,” she finally whispers, and his blood runs cold. He knew it had been longer for her, but this... He wraps his arms around her and lets her cling and tremble and cry.

“How long?” he asks. Now his voice is rough too. He doesn’t want to think of her trapped down there alone for very long. Not his bright, bubbly boss who specifically hired him because she hates being on her own.

She presses even closer in search of comfort. “A few months? Half a year, maybe. I don’t know. I lost count of the cycles.”

She’s shaking now.

“I ended up... maybe fifteen years ago? It was bright. There were people living there - the same people there now, if you went down. But before I went through the door, it was dark and full of corpses. It was my job to stop it, that’s what the man in charge said, but I didn’t know how. It was the law. The Dwarves’ Law. ‘The many shall suffer for the sins of the one.’

“I... when I started looking around, I found the pieces of shiny, undamaged Dwemer armor. The city’s scholar said it would theoretically protect the wearer from the radiation under the city. I thought it was cool, but I didn’t need to go down there, so I wasn’t really concerned. Then I met this... this dying Vigilant of Stendarr, who said there was something evil in the tunnels.

“I thought that might be the cause, so I wanted to take a look. It’d been a few days, and I wanted to come home. But even I couldn’t get through without the full set. I found the gauntlets, the boots, and the helmet. But someone else found the chestpiece first, and he wouldn’t even let me buy it from him! But I needed the set. I... I took it from him. I took it from him, and I broke the law, and everyone died.

“The lights turned out and these centurions that were scattered around the city came to life, and there was fire and screaming and everyone died. They were so scared. And it was my fault. And I took the portal back, and everyone was alive again. But I couldn’t forget. I can still hear them screaming. I can still see the fires when I close eyes. I can still feel the earth shake from the centurions’ footsteps, still smell the burning flesh. Sparky, they were so scared.

“And then I had to do it all again, and again, and again, and so many times I lost count. I tried so many different things, but nothing worked. There was this... thing, under the tunnels. It controlled the centurions, it made the law. And I didn’t have the words to talk it down. I didn’t know how to make it stop. Eventually, I thought I could scare it - take its helmet once and prove that I could and would kill it if it didn’t dismantle the law.

“And it worked, Sparky. I could have been done with it all on the third loop, but I was stupid! I didn’t think, I didn’t try everything, and it was all... all my fault.”

During her story, Meri’s voice had been steady, if pained. But as it draws to a close, the waver returns, and fresh tears spill down her cheeks.

This... as much as he hates her suffering, this is progress. That she is upset people died suggests she values their lives - that’s a step forward. But he has to know why.

“Meri,” he begins, tentative. He doesn’t want to upset her. “I know you’ve killed before, and you’ve done it without caring. This wasn’t your fault - it wasn’t, hush - so... I don’t mean to sound callous, but why do you care so much?”

Meri sniffles. “They were so scared, Sparky. When I kill people here, either they’re angry and trying to kill me, or they never see me coming. And back home, nobody really cared - usually not even the victim. But there... it was slow, inescapable, and painful, and they were terrified. And there was nothing I could do to stop it.”

Meri trembles violently and tries to stop her tears. It doesn’t work. Her arms tighten around his ribs as she breaks out in a fresh round of sobs. “Sparky, I want my Mama!”

His eyes widen, and his blood runs cold as the realization that Meri isn’t just short hits. He really, really doesn’t want to know, but... “Meri, how old are you?”

Meri, still sniffling, looks up at him with a spark of confusion behind the misery clouding her eyes. “A hundred and ninety, why?”

Of course it can’t be easy. It’s Meri. “And how does that compare to the mannish races?”

Realization lights her eyes, and she makes a little sound of understanding. “Mama thinks it’s like early forties for normal Dunmer, and somewhere in the early teens for the mannish races. Maybe fourteen?”

Marcurio hopes the sudden horror creeping up his spine isn’t visible on his face. Everything she’s done, everything she’s experienced - she’s just a little girl! No wonder she doesn’t have any problem dragging the children along with her, she’s barely any older than them herself!

He hugs her tighter, tucking her under his arm, and lets her cry herself out. Only a few minutes later she falls asleep against his side, exhausted by her ordeal and the overwhelming force of her emotions. She’s small enough to carry back to camp, though the torch is a challenge to retrieve with his arms full.

He’ll tell the others later - they need to know that she’s only a child - but for now, he tucks her into her rarely-used bedroll and lets her sleep.

#the elder scrolls #skyrim #bloodline!verse #oc-meri #marcurio #mod: the forgotten city #fanfiction #drabble #story

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actuallylorelaigilmore · 7 years ago

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title: "we hide within our veins the things that keep us bound to one another"

An Alvareider fic!! My first. I am trash and I am not ashamed. They’re so in a grey zone between Luke/Lorelai, Barney/Robin and Joey/Rachel and I would go down with all those ships so I am gonna make Alvareider happen.

**CONTAINS SEASON TWO SPOILERS**

Penelope x Schneider, One Day At A Time. Also on AO3.

“That’s what you think, that I just…get whatever I want?”

“Schneider, I worked my ass off my entire life while you were living on your daddy’s money. You do get whatever you want.”

If Schneider were a different kind of guy–if he were the kind of guy he so often pretended to be–it would have happened that night.

“There’s got to be another way to feel happy.”

She couldn’t feel anything half the time and she loved Max but she didn’t trust him, not completely, not yet…so it was Schneider she went to. Even after she’d done her best to ruin their friendship, it was his door she knocked on in her pajamas with her face blotchy from crying.

She had been doing that more lately: turning to Schneider, of all people.

Penelope couldn’t pinpoint the moment when it happened, but at some point Schneider went from being somebody she wanted to lock out of her apartment to the man she trusted with her darkest secrets.

Maybe it was when he came back with Alex, ranting about how he couldn’t keep her son safe, and proved that he was the best one for the job.

Maybe it was when he was there for Elena before she came out, or when he flew her best friend in for her quinces.

She knew it was before he showed up to get her, clean-shaven and with that impossibly bright smile, smelling so damn good it short-circuited her exhausted brain.

It had to be before then; Penelope refused to think she might be that shallow.

What matters is that things shifted when she wasn’t looking, bringing her to his couch with apologies and confessions and her pain and her fear.

And as much as Schneider was an idiot, so casually privileged and cracking jokes at the worst moments…he took her seriously. He gave her the talking-to she needed, and the hugs she needed even more.

He gave her a safe place to land at rock bottom.

After all, Schneider knew rock bottom better than anybody.

What was it about her, Penelope wondered after that, that meant she kept giving up decent, attractive, interesting men for big human-shaped messes with addiction problems?

The difference, of course, between Victor and Schneider was the size of the Grand Canyon. Where Victor lied and avoided and shut down, Schneider was almost painfully sincere. A goofy, open book who had wedged himself into her family until he fit.

Who was working the program, keeping it together, and could talk to her about fucked up brains with personal authority.

Who loved her.

She didn’t think about that often, the way he so easily loved her and her Mami and her kids, the way Schneider made things like that look effortless while she struggled at every turn.

But she knew it was true; she knew that was why it took him less than three seconds to switch from hurt over the horrible things she said to pulling her to him, wrapping his arms around her and trying to comfort before he even knew what was wrong.

He was a good guy.

Which was why nothing happened.

The kind of man she once believed Schneider was, callous and chauvinistic and selfish, could have pressed his advantage, even knowing she was with Max.

Penelope was falling apart in front of him, she came to him when not even her own mother knew what she had done, and after she realized he actually was her best friend now–when did that happen?–Schneider could have made a move.

It would’ve ruined everything, but another man might have tried.

Victor had.

But Schneider didn’t. He tucked a curl behind her ear with that out-of-place sweetness she was still surprised by, and told her she really needed to tell Lydia.

“She loves you,” he pointed out. “She may not get it, but she wants you to be okay. You’re lucky, Pen.”

And with his five moms and distant dad, she knew he was an expert on that. Why else would he have needed the Alvarez clan so much?

She never should have said the things she said–hurting him because she knew he would let her–but they hit the mark because of the parts that were true. Schneider’s life was so empty in the ways that mattered, while in her family and her work she had so much.

In a very real way, Penelope had him to thank for that, because if Schneider had shut the door in her face rather than laying his own pain bare to help her, she couldn’t say she would have ended up okay. But she was.

After Lydia’s recovery, after they both became citizens and things were looking up, she went to him again.

She was back on her meds, she was level, but she still missed Max. Doing the right thing sucked, and Penelope was tired of making the responsible choice and ending up alone.

Kick the father of her children out again because he was never going to pull it together, because she couldn’t trust him?

Tell her boyfriend to go, because it was what’s best for him, no matter how much it hurt?

“Just once,” she told Schneider, who was blessedly alone in his apartment that night, no weird skinny girl hanging around in his t-shirt while he looked at Penelope like she was the only one in the room, “just once I want to do the selfish thing. Not the smart thing, the mature thing, the thing I know I should do.”

“Yeah?” He had an odd expression on his face, but she barely noticed it, too caught up in the pain she kept bringing to his door.

“Yeah. You know, sometimes being a parent really sucks. I can’t just have fun like you, do whatever I want…I have to do the best thing.”

“Penelope, you know you act like I have this charmed life?” Schneider ran a hand over his face and sighed. “It’s not like things are easy for me. I mean, yeah, sure, I’m smart and gorgeous, but that’s no guarantee of a good time.”

“Oh, please.” She rolled her eyes. “Besides the drugs, name one thing that you can’t just wave your money at and have, without even trying.”

“Seriously.”

Schneider was staring at her like she was stupid, which was usually her role in their relationship. It was unsettling.

“What?”

“That’s what you think, that I just…get whatever I want?”

“Schneider, I worked my ass off my entire life while you were living on your daddy’s money. You do get whatever you want.”

He blinked at her for a moment, the silence stretching out between them. Penelope watched as he reached up, very slowly, very deliberately, and took off his glasses.

He had done that before, blinking owlishly at her to make a point, but now there was no reason for it. She frowned, and waited.

There was literally nothing Schneider could have done to surprise her more than pausing while his glasses hit the side table with a quiet clink and then leaning in to brush his mouth over hers.

He could have gotten up and performed a musical for her of his own creation and Penelope would have cringed and tried to flee, but she also would have thought, classic Schneider, and taken it in stride.

This…this shocked her.

What shocked her even more was that she didn’t push him away. She was too stunned to kiss him back, but she let him run a hand up her shoulder to cup the back of her neck.

Before he tilted his head to change the angle of the kiss, Schneider pulled away just enough to focus those nearsighted eyes on hers, searching for consent.

Of course he didn’t push, of course he didn’t offer her some stupid comment to snap her out of the moment…of course he just waited, while she looked back at him and realized this wasn’t actually surprising.

Somehow, it also was not surprising, the way his eyelashes fluttered closed when Penelope crossed the distance to kiss him again. She’d seen how soft and sweet and even kind of delicate Schneider could be underneath that frustrating hipster attitude.

When she kissed him back, curiously more than anything, exploring what this was exactly, and he let out a little sigh with his eyes shut, she felt something that shouldn’t have surprised her at all.

Because the trauma that ran through her blood, that she would carry with her for the rest of her life, it was different from the neglect and the loneliness that ran through his…but it was the also the same.

She and Victor had nearly identical scars, which she thought was a good thing, until it wasn’t. She and Schneider had scars that matched like jigsaw pieces–it wasn’t like looking in a mirror, but it was like taking all worst things she wanted to hide about herself, and realizing they fit.

With him, they fit. He gets it.

He was her best friend and her family and the person she trusted when everything was too much.

She loved him, too.

So Penelope deepened the kiss into his sigh, sliding her tongue against his and almost laughing at the way his eyes flew open…as though he didn’t start this, as though he never expected her to reciprocate.

She remembered the conversation that led them here and realized he probably didn’t. It was her he was talking about, when he insisted he couldn’t always have what he wanted.

Penelope nearly stopped things right there, gave him back his glasses so he looked like Schneider again, and demanded answers. How long had he felt this way, been thinking about it?

Had it been there this whole time, while he ate meals with her family and tried to insert himself into her relationship and was always, always there for her?

She was a little bit afraid of the answer, and even more afraid that he’d want to know the same thing, from her side. She was not ready to think about that.

She didn’t come there to think.

She just wanted a break from being a mom and a daughter and ex-Army, the high achiever who could barely sleep at night. He knew all those sides of her, but it turned out Schneider also saw the side of her that she worried she gave up when she gave up Max. The needy, wanting side, the woman who took risks to be happy.

He looked at her, sitting there in a tank top and jeans and thinking the whole thing over, and Penelope looked back at him, his hair mussed and mouth slightly pink from her lipstick–and she knew he saw her. All of her.

When she nodded to herself and climbed half into his lap and kissed him harder, she swallowed his groan and let herself stop thinking.

After all, this was Schneider.

Whatever came next, she could trust him.

send me a fic title and i’ll tell you what story i would write

#one day at a time #alvareider #alright people it's time to make this happen #penelope x schneider #schneider x penelope #a crackship a rarepair my brotp #spoilers #cykluber #replies #odaat #odaat s2 #odaat spoilers #odaat fic #odaat fanfic #one day at a time fanfic #alvareider fanfic #alvareider fic #my fic

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prettyfunkyunorganized · 7 years ago

Text

If Things Had Been Different - Gabe

Hello again! I’m so glad to be back! Things have finally settled down, for the most part, so here’s a post. Finally.

So, while I was absent I got a bit of writing done when I needed a distraction and this is the result. I kept thinking about Raper and how different things might have been for Gabriel if he had found out about little Sonya before she was born. So I wrote about it. And I fucking love it. A lot. So yeah, have just over 3,100 words about pre-fall Gabe getting a call in the middle of the night about his ex.

If Things Had Been Different - Gabe: pt 2

Daughter Series - Reaper Installments (the original story): pt 1, pt 2, pt 3, pt 4

Gabe was sitting in his office, staring blankly at the wall across from him. He had only been in charge of Blackwatch for about six months but holy hell had it been a mess. It was secret ops, so he knew it was going to be messy, but he had gravely underestimated how much work and time this job was going to be. “I agreed to this because Jack asked me to, because I needed a distraction after pissing off my woman and my side girl, but shit . . . Might have made a mistake.” His head lulled back as he closed his eyes. It was late, or maybe early, and he was exhausted.

He had a good team, but a team that was good for black ops. Shifty, ruthless, calculating, sometimes drunk, always ready to kill black ops soldiers. They were good operatives, they were, but they all had that same broken psychology and tons of emotional baggage they kept squirreled away.

Jack had asked Gabe to watch over them, keep them under control, contain them. Because Gabe wasn’t like them. But after six months? After reading reports of sickening corruption, deadly biochemical weapons, genocide involving women and children – so many disgusting, awful, gut-wrenching things – he could feel a callous growing around his heart. He’d held a dying child in his arms, he’d sent agents after a politician who was using a children’s home as a cover for human trafficking, he’d watched a woman stab herself in the abdomen with a shard of broken glass once she found out she was pregnant with a warlord’s child. Gabe had always known there were fucked up people in the world, everyone knows that, but coming face to face with their victims was getting to him. Most of the people he saved nowadays weren’t grateful and full of praise, they were drained, body and soul. He was quickly becoming just as empty.

And if terrified him.

But it was worth it. He could be a husk of a man if so many others could live their lives in peace. “I can handle it,” he murmured to himself. “I’ll get by. I’ll find a way. I have to.”

It was nights like this he missed having someone to go home to, someone to make him smile – or at least fake one. Fake it ‘til you make it and all that. Ruby, the woman he’d had an affair with, always made him grin, until the sex was over. Nora, the woman he’d betrayed, made him feel at ease, for the first ten minutes he was home, then it turned into a guilt trip about settling down.

None of that mattered now, though. Both of those relationships had crumbled into a sea of regret, quite catastrophically, too. He was alone with his work now. No reason to leave the base unless it was a mission, no reason to pretend he was fine unless Jack or Ana came around, and no reason to go back to his room. He would likely get back to work and fall asleep at his desk. Again.

Before Gabe’s fingers reached the keyboard the phone rang and he froze. A call? This time of night? “Nothing good comes from a ringing phone at 2:30 in the morning,” he sighed. “What atrocity am I dealing with tonight?”

The HR department’s extension number registered in Gabe’s mind just as he hit the speaker button. “Fuck,” he hissed. Human Resources. Someone on the team had made a mess. Pollas en vinagre.

“Good evening, Commander Reyes,” came a tense voice clearly trying to play it cool.

“It’s morning, miss, and I’m getting a call from HR, I doubt anything about this is ‘good.’ Just tell me what’s going on,” he grumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“The local hospital called, sir, they are asking you to head there right away,” the woman said hurriedly.

“I swear to God,” he growled. “Who did it? Who ruined my night this time?” Then again, his night had been shit long before this.

The woman on the other end hesitated and Gabe grew concerned. These calls were nothing new, and no one had ever struggled to give him the news quite like this.

“Is someone dead,” the commander asked gravely.

“No, no,” she clarified, sounding worried, “but there was a close call. With a woman named Angelica . . .”

He reeled. “Ruby? Why the hell are you calling me about her? That woman is no longer my concern and I intend to keep it that way.”

“I understand that, sir, and I told the hospital that but they thought – ” She faltered again. “They thought you might be concerned with the baby she’s carrying.”

Gabe suddenly felt very cold and his fingertips felt as if they were being pricked by needles. Baby? Baby? When the fuck had that happened . . . It couldn’t be his, could it? Yeah, they had been screwing a while ago, but – holy shit. Holy shit. He had probably gotten her knocked up.

He took a deep breath and forced the panic away from his mind. “Is this Lydia,” he asked the woman on the other end.

“Yes, sir.”

“Have you told anyone else about this?”

“No, sir.”

“Good, good,” he huffed. “Don’t. I’m leaving now, but I’ll be back as soon as I can and sort things out then.”

“Sure thing, Commander,” she agreed, “I’ll tell everyone you’re handling some Blackwatch business. They know better to ask anything more after that. Except for your agents, they might be suspicious, but I’ll keep them off your tail as long as I can.”

“Thanks, Lydia. I owe you,” Gabe moaned.

“No problem, and, uh, good luck.”

He laughed dryly, “Thanks, think I’m gonna need it.”

They both hang up and Gabe headed for the door, throwing on a hoodie with shaking hands. The cab ride was excoriatingly long, giving the man plenty of time to scream at himself for ever getting together with Ruby in the first place while subsequently praying she wasn’t hurt too bad. For the baby’s sake. “Baby,” he whispered in the back seat. “There’s a baby and it’s mine. Maybe.” He should have asked Lydia what had happened. Sitting here, wondering what had put his pregnant ex in the ER was killing him. He darted out of the car before it actually stopped.

A grumpy man behind a desk pointed him in the right direction. The two of them had seen each other before, usually when one of his agents got drunk and roughed someone up – or got roughed up themselves, but the nurse seemed particularly judgmental tonight. Guess he had reason to be. There was a doctor closing the door to Ruby’s room as he approached.

“Excuse me, ma’am,” Gabe said, his voice slightly more high pitched than usual, “is Rub- Angelica in there?”

“Yes, she is,” the doctor nodded brow slightly pinched in a way that made Gabe feel weak. “You must be the father?”

“Um, yes,” he choked out, “I guess I am.”

“You didn’t know about this,” she asked in surprise.

“No, I had no idea. I would have . . . No, I didn’t know.” Gabe couldn’t say exactly what he would have done if he had known about all this earlier, but he would like to believe he could have kept Ruby out of the hospital at least.

“Well then,” the doctor began, seeming satisfied, “I’m glad you got here so quickly. Perhaps you can help us figure a few things out. She’s being uncooperative.”

“Sounds right,” Gabe sighed. “I’ll tell you anything I can, but I haven’t seen her in around half a year.”

“I see,” she frowned at the chart in her hands. “Was she taking any illegal narcotics when you last saw her? And please, be honest.”

“Na-narcotics,” he gaped. “No! Ruby likes to get a little wild, party harder than most, but I never saw her taking any heavy drugs. Not once.”

“She is now,” the doctor said pursing her lips, “and she’s clearly not been taking care of herself or the fetus in any other way. I’m stunned we haven’t seen her in here before now.”

Gabe felt cold all over again, but it permeated deeper this time. He swallowed hard. “The baby’s okay though, right?”

She pursed her lips and looked away a moment. “There’s still a heartbeat, but it’s not as strong as it should be, and the mother is very malnourished, meaning the child is too. In all honesty, you’re lucky there hasn’t been a miscarriage. We would like to do some testing and a proper ultrasound but she keeps fighting us. We’re worried that if we force anything we will hurt her or the baby.”

Gabe ran his fingers through his hair and hunched over. “Christ, Ruby, what the hell happened?”

“Look,” the doctor sighed, losing a bit of her professionalism, “she’s awake now and she’s said your name a number of times so maybe you can get through to her, convince us to let us help her. She has an IV she keeps messing with but she NEEDS it. That baby needs it, too. If you can calm her down that would help a lot.”

He scratched his scruffle and nodded despite his lack of faith. “I’ll do what I can.” She stepped out of the way and allowed Gabe to see the patient.

Ruby was almost unrecognizable. Her hair had been dyed some unnatural shade of black, her skin was marred with scabs and scratches, her face was hollowed and limbs unsettlingly thin. If it weren’t for that trademark red lipstick Gabe would have thought he was in the wrong room. A thin blanket was covering her lower body, but he could see the shape of a large bump at her midsection. “Mierda, Ruby, what have you done to yourself?”

She leaned her head up and scowled. “What are you doing here, goody two shoes?”

He came closer slowly, timidly, and leaned on the foot of her bed. “Docs called me. Said you were asking for me.”

Ruby scoffed and pulled her covers closer. “There’s no way I did that.”

“I sure as hell haven’t been keeping tabs on you anymore,” he said flatly, “you must have said something.”

“They were drilling me for an emergency contact,” she muttered, “musta let something slip.”

“I’m glad you did,” Gabe murmured more gently before looking from a nasty bruise on his ex’s arm to her face. “You should have told me, Rube, about the baby. You should have told me.”

They stared right into each other’s eyes, both refusing to give in. She had an awful glare, but it began to slip, bit by bit until she was biting her lip as tears formed in her eyes. “Don’t you fucking chide me, Gabriel,” she spat, “don’t you dare.”

“What do you expect me to do,” he said coming around to the side of her bed, “you’re pregnant, really pregnant, and I had no idea! Why didn’t you tell me?”

She picked at the nubs of her chipped, bloody fingernails. “Didn’t see the point – if this thing survives I’ll be dumping it off at an orphanage as soon as the cord’s cut.”

Gabe lost it, gripping the rail on her bed and leaning over Ruby as she jolted in shock. “What the fuck do you mean, if the baby survives?! Were you trying to kill it? And yourself? Is that why you picked up a needle and started jabbing yourself? WHY?! Ruby, I could have helped you. If you didn’t want the baby that’s your call, I would have accepted that, but pumping yourself full of poison and starving yourself is not okay. That’s not fair to our kid. It’s not their fault you got knocked up, it’s mine. Punish me if you want, but don’t become a junkie and torture yourself like this. Please. You’re better than this.”

“Gabe,” she whispered, wiping the tears from her cheeks and trembling, “I’m not better than this and you know it. I know I should have told you but I couldn’t. I don’t know why, but I just couldn’t! That fucking pregnancy test came back positive and I just spiraled out of control. Christ, I hardly even remember the past few months. It’s like I just kept getting bigger and no matter what I did this thing kept living and every part of me kept hurting. I’m sorry Gabe, I am, but – but – ” She began to sob and shake, hands clamped over her mouth as she tried to control herself.

“Alright, alright,” he said softly, “deep breaths.” Gabe was still irate, but he wasn’t going to be cruel and berate Ruby while she was lying in the ER. He rubbed her shoulder until she stopped hyperventilating. She looked exhausted, as if the outburst had drained the last of her energy.

“This baby is better off never being born,” she whimpered, “I’m sure she’s already sick and rotten like me, and we all know I shouldn’t be a mother. I don’t want to be one.”

“No one is going to force you be a mom, Ruby. Honest, but that little guy is pretty big now, I don’t think an abortion is an option anymore.”

“It’s not,” she groaned. “I don’t know what to do now.”

“Well, I’m hoping you’ll try to take better care of the baby until its born and I take over,” Gabe said firmly. She frowned up at him.

“You’re going to take her? Mr. Overwatch man who has no time? The guy who got together with me because he didn’t want to get serious with his lady?”

“Things are different now,” he said somewhat aggravatedly, “it’s not Nora harping at me, there a kid. My kid. A kid who didn’t ask for any of this and needs me. I’m not saying I’m going to be father of the year, but I’m going to try.”

She eyed him thoughtfully for a long minute before sighing, sounding relieved. “You’ll take good care of ‘em,” Ruby nodded. “They’ll be okay with you.” Her eyes closed and she buried into her pillow.

“Hey,” Gabe said encouraging her to stay awake, “you gotta let these doctors know you’ll work with them, okay?”

“Fine,” she griped, rolling over onto her back. Her stomach looked massive on her withered body.

He hit the nurse call button, still staring at her belly. “Uh, Rube?”

“Yeah?”

“How far along are you?”

“I dunno, maybe seven months? Maybe more?”

“Wait,” he said pursing his lips, “you broke it off with me when you were already pregnant? Did you know?”

“Shut up and go find the doctor,” she snapped, waving him away with a disgruntled look. He knew better than to press the issue at this point. Besides, no changing it now. He’d be less pissed if he kept thinking about the future and not how things could have been.

There was some discussion, some paperwork, and a lot of Ruby rolling her eyes, but in the end, Gabe was given access to his ex’s medical information – he would be kept informed at all times on the status of both patients.

“Is there anything else you need from me,” Gabe asked.

“No,” Dr. Faraday, the woman from the hall, replied, “everything should be in order. We will let you know once the test results come in and when an ultrasound is scheduled. For now, Ms. Cotter needs to get some rest, we’ll start treatment tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” he said with a small smile. “Can I have another minute with her? I’ll be out soon, I promise.”

“So long as you keep it short,” she agreed, leaving the room. Ruby yawned and glanced to Gabe.

“What else do you want,” she asked sleepily. “I really don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

He leaned on the bed again, hands in his pockets. “All I want to say is thank you for being amicable about all this. I’m not going to condone what you’ve done, but I’m glad you’re trying to make it right.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she huffed, “I’m just glad it will be over soon.”

“If at any point you want to change your mind, if you want to see your baby – ”

“No,” she all but yelled. “I don’t want anything to do with either of you after it’s born! I’m putting all this behind me, like it never happened.”

“Okay, okay.” Gabe knew he should leave, let her be, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. There was just one more thing he –

“What is it, Gabriel,” Ruby growled, “I know you want to say something. Just do it so I can go to bed!”

“I was hoping I could, maybe,” he fumbled.

“Spit it out.”

“Could I . . . feel your stomach? Just once? I’ll understand if you say no, but – ”

“Will you leave if I say yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then go for it. Little shit won’t stop moving around so you may as well do it when I can’t ignore the kid.” She pulled her blanket down and exposed a filthy crop top and some unbuttoned jeans surrounding her mostly bare belly. There were bruises and what looked like cigarette burns on her tight skin. Gabe was equal parts enraged and entranced. His little mijo or mija was in there. A goofy smile blossomed under his curly mustache.

He placed his palm gently on a patch of unmarred flesh and rubbed his thumb along the curve of her stomach. “Hang in there, conejito,” he murmured.

One soft little pat thumped against Ruby’s skin just to the right of Gabe’s hand. He laughed and moved his hand to the spot and the baby kicked right in the center of his hand. “That’s my girl.”

Ruby squirmed awkwardly and yanked the covers over her. “I’m tired,” she said in a voice so meek Gabe hardly believed it came from the party animal.

“Sure,” he said moving away, thumb rubbing the spot on his palm where his child had kicked. “Get some sleep and try to take is easy on the docs, okay? They’re trying to look after you, both of you.” She nodded and closed her eyes.

“And take care of my girl for me,” he said just above a whisper as he opened the door.

“Gabe?”

“Yeah?”

“You really think it’s a girl?”

He thought a moment. “Guess I do. Just a feeling.”

“Don’t name her after me.”

He held back a snort. “Alright.”

“And . . . make up a story about her mom. Something nice. Don’t let her grow up knowing what I did to her. That I was this shitty.”

“I’ll do what I think is right for her,” he said determinedly, “but I’ll be gentle when I tell her about you.”

“’Kay. Night, Gabe.”

“Night, Rube.”

@watch-your-grammer @winchester-sonsandcastiel @envy-kitty

#mine #writing #overwatch #overwatch drabble #drabble #my drabble #gabe #sonya #if things had been different #daughter series

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singingwordwright · 7 years ago

Link

Gorgeous cover art courtesy of @beyondthehunt Originally betaed by @roseglass with some final (eventual) copy-editing by @bonibaru

A Separate Peace (sequel to One Easy Answer) a Malec AU by @maleccrazedauthor

(Also on AO3)

Chapters: 19/28 Word Count: 104,900 Rating: Mature Premise: Arranged Marriage AU, Canon Divergent starting at Ep 1x12

(Please See Chapter List for Notes and Summary)

Alec looked…absolutely shattered.

Magnus had heard of heartbreak intense enough to make the angels—notoriously pitiless as they were—weep. He’d even experienced grief on that level once or twice. But he’d never imagined how the angels themselves would appear as they wept.

Now he knew.

Alec’s reddened eyes met Magnus’s over the top of Maryse’s head as Alec held her, tears tracking down his cheeks unchecked. There was something so…hollow…in his gaze. It was the look of someone utterly devoid of hope or joy, someone whose very heart had been scooped out by the merciless hand of a callous and capricious deity.

For the second time that night, Magnus felt himself pierced through the chest.

He didn’t approach the Lightwoods filling the room. As much as he wanted to go to Alec and offer him comfort, it was obvious Alec was trying to be strong for the rest of his family. Jace and Isabelle clung to each other as well, and Robert Lightwood stood off to the side, a little apart, hunched over and looking somehow diminished.

Magnus knew he wouldn’t be rejected, if he approached. But the question was, what could he do right now that would most benefit Alec and this family he’d never in his wildest dreams expected to become a part of. The answer was: pathetically little, except attend to the practicalities Alec needed to neglect while he comforted his loved ones. Later, there would be time for Magnus to offer him a safe place to fall apart himself, but not yet. He let his eyes express his sympathy, and Alec nodded once in acknowledgment and buried his face in Maryse’s hair.

“What happened?” Magnus asked softly, stepping back from the door into the hallway where Lydia and Clary stood. Clary’s face was streaked with tears, and Lydia’s entire being radiated that awkward, miserable state of feeling sympathy for someone but not quite being close enough to them to actively offer comfort.

She, too, pitched her voice low. “We found them in the sub-levels. Max’s throat had been slit, and Madzie was hiding. I need to get back to the Ops Center; the Institute is on full lockdown. No one goes in or out until we find who did this.”

“Understood,” Magnus said, receiving the unspoken message. He, Catarina, and Madzie were all stuck here until the murderer was caught.

Which meant they had no hope of getting Madzie back home, where she’d feel safe again.

Clary laid a hand on his arm as Lydia left. “Go take care of Madzie. I’ll stay here in case they need anything.”

Magnus nodded and retreated to the room where Catarina was tending to Madzie. Madzie sat on the bed, looking tiny and fragile, the shoe missing from one foot. Her eyes were haunted, and her mouth was open as Catarina asked her gentle questions, as though she wanted to provide the answers, but the words were locked in her throat, unable to escape.

“It’s okay, kiddo,” Catarina said, kissing Madzie’s brow as tears of frustration and fear fell from those huge, terrified eyes. “I know you’d tell us if you could. You’re such a good girl. You’ll be okay.”

Madzie shook her head wildly, pointing at the wall that divided her room from the one where Max’s body lay.

“No, sweet pea, that won’t happen to you,” Magnus promised, ignoring the pain of his wound to squat beside her bed. “Catarina and I won’t let it.”

Her mouth moved again with a sort of desperate urgency, her breath hitching hysterically. She was on the verge of hyperventilating when Cat murmured a tranquility spell and lightly brushed her glowing hand across Madzie’s forehead. Madzie sank bank on the bed, not exactly asleep, but calm enough to close her eyes and slow her breathing. It would only last a short while, though, before the panic returned.

“She wants to tell us what happened,” Cat said, meeting Magnus’s gaze. “This baby’s trying so hard, but she just can’t. And if we don’t find a way to help her, you know sooner or later Imogen Herondale is going to come barging through that door demanding answers, scaring her worse.”

“If she does, I will burn her to a cinder,” Magnus swore, feeling his eyes flash.

“Magnus—” Cat began, but before she could continue, Alec carefully pushed open the door and peered inside. His face was blotchy, his shoulders slumped, and he walked into the room as if trudging through wet cement up to his knees.

He had to clear his throat twice before he could speak, and even then his voice was thick and clogged. “How—how is she?”

Catarina’s face hardened, as if for an instant, she wanted to blame Alec for what had befallen Madzie. In the end she couldn’t. “Not well,” she said instead, in a resentful mutter. “We were just talking about how we need to keep your Inquisitor away from her.”

He nodded jerkily. He wiped the tears away with the back of his hand, straightening his shoulders. Each word seemed to cost him tremendous effort. “The plan was, um, that I’d be the one to talk to her when she got here. We-we should stick to that, before the Inquisitor gets any other ideas.”

“It was a good plan, but it’s not gonna work,” Catarina said with a sigh, her posture relaxing a little. In the end, Alec wasn’t the enemy, no matter how hard her protective instincts were screaming at her. “She’s trying to tell me what happened but she…she just can’t. She can’t make herself speak.”

Magnus’s expanding chest ached sharply as he drew a deep breath. “Perhaps it’s time for me to step in.”

Catarina gave him a dismayed look. “You’re still healing, Magnus. You should be resting, not doing magic.”

“Well, ordinarily I’d be the last person to argue with your expertise in matters of healing, Cat,” he said with a wry smile he had to force, “but it seems our options are limited and getting narrower by the moment.”

“What are you talking about?” Alec asked in his shredded voice, folding his arms across his chest as though he could hold himself together that way.

“I am the world’s foremost expert on memory spells,” Magnus explained. “We’ve disregarded the idea of using that with Madzie thus far because it would be better for her to deal with the trauma she’s experienced in her own time and her own way, until she can put it into words for herself. But time isn’t on our side and the longer this drags on, the more likely it is that the Inquisitor is going to do something to make Madzie’s recovery even more difficult.”

Alec nodded slowly. “So, something like that you did with Clary?”

“Not exactly,” Magnus answered. “I can…peer at Madzie’s memories without removing them. Even show them to another. If she chooses to share the memories and doesn’t resist the process, it won’t cause her any discomfort. I’ve done this with Jace and Clary, in fact, when they needed help interpreting the vision Ithuriel granted them.”

“Are you well enough to do it?” Alec asked quietly.

Catarina made an unhappy sound but Magnus held up a hand to halt her protest. “It’s not a complicated spell. I can do it without depleting myself too much or interfering with my healing.”

Alec looked at the floor for a long moment, so long it seemed like perhaps he’d zoned out entirely and forgotten they were there, waiting for his response. When he looked back up, however, Magnus realized it had simply taken him that long to focus his normally disciplined mind well enough to process what Magnus was proposing and what it would entail.

“All right. Catarina, can you continue healing Magnus for now, please?” he asked. “I’ll talk to Jace and Lydia and the Inquisitor, let them know about the change of plan and deal with any arguments that need to be had far away from Madzie. Plan to do this in another half-hour to an hour?”

Catarina nodded once. “I’ll have Magnus as ready as I can.”

Alec started to back out the door and Magnus moved before he could stop himself.

“Alexander—” he reached out and caught Alec’s hand, which trembled in his grasp. “Alec, I am so—so very sorry.”

Alec’s lips whitened. Tears quivered on his eyelashes as he closed his eyes and sniffed once, then gave a jerky nod. “I know. I’m—I-I can’t do this. Not yet. Please? Magnus. I can’t.”

Magnus’s heart broke a little more. “I know, Alec. I know. Go do what you need to do.”

It was Jace who made the difference, running interference with his grandmother. Sympathy for Alec and his family might not have been enough to move her, otherwise.

An hour after he left them, he returned to the infirmary room with Jace, the Inquisitor, and Maryse at his heels. Izzy had chosen to stay with Max’s body until the Silent Brothers came for him, and Robert had opted to stay with her. Alec was surprised his father wasn’t more insistent on getting the answers they needed, but Robert seemed shrunken and broken, even more so than the rest of them.

Magnus was sitting on the bed beside Madzie, and to Alec’s eye he seemed to be in considerably less pain. He stroked Madzie’s hair, speaking to her gently.

“—Alright, sweet pea? Remember, it won’t hurt. You just need to let me in to see the memories, and then no one will try to make you talk about it if you can’t.”

Madzie nodded soberly, casting a nervous glance toward the door.

Alec turned to the people behind him. “I want everyone to wait out here except my mother. Madzie knows her, trusts her a little. Between the two of us, that should be verification enough that there hasn’t been any tampering with the memories?”

He punctuated the question with a glower at Herondale, who’d had the audacity to suggest that one of the warlocks might try to lie about the memories they recovered if there was something they wanted to hide. Only Alec’s assurance that Magnus could share the memories with Alec as he accessed them, and Jace’s heartfelt plea for her to trust Alec on this, had ended the debate.

Jace nodded, his eyes as red-rimmed and his face as full of loss as Alec’s own. “Of course. We’ll be here when you have something to report.”

Alec closed the door firmly on the rest of them and squeezed Maryse’s hand once before crossing to Madzie and Magnus.

“What do I need to do?” he asked. The answer should probably be obvious, but clarity of thought was a rare and precious commodity at the moment, and not something to be squandered on insignificant details. Each small act of concentration felt like it cost him a year of effort.

“Just sit beside us,” Magnus said gently, patting the edge of the bed. “And try to clear your mind.”

That seemed like an absurd proposition, and yet when Alec tried to seek a blank space in his mind, one free from all the grief and turmoil, his thoughts went there gratefully, as though glad to escape.

Magnus laid a hand on the side of Alec’s head, and another on Madzie’s. He murmured an incantation in Latin that Alec should have been able to translate as easily as if he’d spoken English, but there in that safe, empty place in his mind, the words were just gibberish. He closed his eyes, and then…

…The corridor of the sub-level was musty, with cobwebs swaying and dropping dust overhead, but Madzie didn’t stop. She could hear voices echoing off the stone walls, coming closer, and she needed to find a place to hide.

“So, you say this girl was a prisoner of Valentine’s?” asked an accented voice. The voice she didn’t think she recognized, but the accent was familiar. She’d heard something similar before, during her time with the Bad Man.

“Yeah.” That other voice was the Shadowhunter boy. Alec’s brother, Max. He seemed to be nice, but she kept seeing him with Shadowhunters she knew weren’t nice at all. Alec seemed to think Max was a safe person for her, but Madzie wasn’t so sure. “Everyone is too busy with Magnus and fighting with the Inquisitor, so I decided to look for her myself.”

“I see.”

“Alec says she’s really scared of Shadowhunters, so you should stay back. She knows me.”

“She’s a warlock, Max. Are you sure she’s not a threat?”

“She won’t hurt me. She’s just scared.”

“That’s when people are at their most dangerous, you should know this from your lessons,” the accented voice chided. “You need to keep away. Let me approach her.”

“No,” Max said firmly. They were close enough now that Madzie could see them down the corridor when she peered around the big stone grave…things. “I told you. She trusts me. I don’t want to scare her any more.”

“Here’s the thing, Max.” The accented voice…changed a little. Grew calmer, and somehow that made it scarier. “You know how Isabelle is always talking about how families need to stick together? Present a united front? That’s what the Lightwoods do, no matter what, right?”

“Uh-huh. So?”

“Well, my father taught me the same lesson. And this girl, she knows things that could be harmful to my father. I need to…” he seemed to fumble for words. “…I need to make sure she doesn’t tell anyone.”

It took Max a moment to answer. “You’re not gonna hurt her, are you, Sebastian?”

“No. No, of course not.” Sebastian chuckled, and to Madzie’s ears it was an evil sound full of menace. It was just like the way the Bad Man laughed when making promises. “I just need to…talk to her.”

Madzie curled up in a tighter ball behind the stone grave-thing, staring at the dead-end before her. She couldn’t create a portal in here; she’d already tried, and even if she could, it would attract their notice. She silently begged Max to argue with the accented man some more, to give her time to find a way out, but Max said nothing else.

Only one set of footfalls echoed off the stone walls, coming closer and closer. Until…

There was a sudden shuffle of running footsteps, and Max’s voice, firm and clear, “You said your father was dead.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“You’re lying. Your parents are dead. You were raised by your aunt. That’s what you told me.” Max’s voice quavered just a little, but he spoke as though he had no doubts. “You’re the one they were talking about. Valentine’s mole in the Institute. You want to hurt her.”

“Max, you need to put take your hand off your blade and get out of my way. This is for you and your family as much as it is mine.” Sebastian got even quieter and more insistent. “I don’t wish to hurt you. We both want to protect our families. We can only do that by getting rid of this warlock.”

“She’s just a little girl. We’re Shadowhunters. We don’t hurt innocent children, even if they are Downworlders. We took an oath.” The metallic zing of a blade being drawn from its sheath echoed in the corridor, and Max started murmuring something. At first Madzie couldn’t make it out, but then his voice grew clearer. “…and vow to uphold the Laws of Heaven, so I may join the ranks of the Shadowhunters, the guardians of peace.”

What followed was barely a scuffle. Madzie peeked around the grave-thing in time to see a flash of blood arc cross the corridor, and then a blond man she didn’t recognize lifted his head. His skin was weirdly splotchy, like he had a bad rash, and his eyes were black and full of demonic evil as he looked straight at her.

Madzie let loose with a surge of her magic, blasting him off his feet and shorting out all the lights for this half of the basement. In the darkness, she scrambled away from her hiding spot and fumbled for another grave-thing to hide behind. This one was off more to the side of the corridor, creating a space between it and the wall that she tucked herself into.

“Madzie?” he called into the darkness, and there was a flash of light. Peering through a crack, she saw a glowing stone in his hand. She flung out a ball of magic and knocked it out of his grip and off into the darkness, where it stopped glowing.

“It’s a dead end, little warlock,” he voice had dropped to a low growl. “I will find you.”

If there was one thing Madzie knew how to do, it was staying quiet. That had been the first and most unbreakable rule when she’d lived with Nana. You didn’t speak about the strangeness of all the babies, or the desperate women who came seeking help and came up from the basement looking haunted. You never, never spoke of any of it, even if someone asked.

Madzie huddled there in that tiny crevice between the grave-thing and the wall, and stayed quiet while he fumbled and cursed in the dark, drawing nearer.

Then she pulled off her scarf.

He didn’t die the way he should have, as the oxygen was sucked out of the air around him. Whatever he was, he wasn’t like the Shadowhunters she had killed when the Bad Man had brought her here. He coughed and wheezed, and he stopped coming closer, but he didn’t die.

Eventually, though, he gave up and ran away, as voices came ringing down the corridor from the far, far end of the basement.

Madzie remained where she was hidden. And stayed quiet...

...Alec gasped as Magnus halted the flow of memories into his mind. It took him a moment to remember that he was Alec, not Madzie, and to shake himself free of the terror of hiding in that gap behind the sarcophagus, being hunted in the dark. Then he jumped off the bed and ran for the door.

“It’s Sebastian,” he blurted once he’d yanked it open. Jace, Herondale and Clary all came to their feet. “He killed Max. I think—I think he’s Jonathan.”

“What?” Clary’s jaw dropped. “How—”

The door to the room that still held Max’s body opened, and Izzy stood there, pale and tear-streaked, with Robert standing behind her.

“How could it be Sebastian?” she asked. “We trusted him.”

Alec shook his head. “He kept talking to Max about Madzie knowing things that could hurt his father. Sebastian Verlac’s parents are dead. He was raised by his aunt. He had to have been talking about Valentine.”

“I’m on it,” Jace said, storming toward the elevator with Clary on his heels.

“And what about the girl’s time with Valentine?” the Inquisitor asked once they were gone. “What does she remember? Does she know about the Cup?”

“I-I don’t know yet. What she shared was about Max, what happened down in the basement. We didn’t see her memories of Valentine.”

“We can try again,” Magnus offered, laying a hand on Alec’s arm. “Madzie seems to have coped with sharing the memories without any undue distress. As long as she’s still willing, we can focus more on her time with Valentine.”

“Yeah.” Alec nodded grimly. “I want to know what the hell Sebastian meant when he mentioned protecting our family.”

“Ours?” Izzy echoed with an astonished look. “Why would he say that?”

“It could easily have been a lie,” Magnus said quickly. “You can’t give too much credence to it.”

“I know.” Alec nodded at him, then looked from his mother to his sister and father again. “Sebastian was trying to convince Max to let him kill Madzie, but Max…Max protected her.”

Pride and tears both welled up and threatened to choke him. Tears spilled down Izzy’s cheeks while Robert bowed his head and wiped his face.

Behind Alec, Maryse sniffled. “Well, let’s find out the truth then,” she said, and when Alec turned back to her, she was dabbing at her eyes.

Beside the bed, Catarina was murmuring something to Madzie, and Madzie was looking calmer than she had before, as though sharing the memory had relieved her of the burden of bearing it. Alec and Magnus sat with her again, and Alec noticed Izzy had come to stand in the doorway, leaving Robert alone with Max.

“Madzie,” Magnus said gently, “we need to do the spell one more time, okay? This time, though, I need you to try to remember some of the things you saw when you were with Valentine. Things he may have talked about, or people he might have spoken with. If he ever mentioned a Cup around you, we really need to know about that too, okay?”

Madzie nodded, and then reached past Magnus to place her hands directly on Alec’s head. She silently mouthed the incantation Magnus had used earlier, and…

…Madzie stared down at the spellbook she couldn’t read. Pretty Dot had been teaching her from it, but Pretty Dot had needed to rest, because she was sick. So now there was nothing for Madzie to do but sit there in the shadowed corner and wait.

At the far end of the indoor carnival, the man who had promised to help Madzie find Nana strolled among the cages with his hands clasped behind his back. He looked pleased with himself, and Madzie hoped that meant he would take her to her Nana soon. He kept promising, but they never went to Nana no matter how many times he promised. He got her treats and spoke kindly to her, but the way his eyes had gleamed when he learned what her gills could do and the way he talked to Pretty Dot gave Madzie a bad feeling, like worms wriggling in her stomach. As though she’d eaten too much sugar and might throw up.

Right now the man had company, another man with dark marks on his skin. He had a beard and an accent and wore a suit. He stood with his spine straight, but he seemed relaxed.

His smile wasn’t a pleasant one.

“…unfortunate that Alec Lightwood hasn’t succeeded in removing himself from the board in a fit of grief over what he did to Jocelyn. Still, it’s fair to say the backbone of the Institute’s spiritual leadership has been broken,” the bearded man said smugly. “The Lightwood girl is far too preoccupied weaning herself off the yin fen I provided her to interfere, and without his sister and parabatai, the brother is nothing.”

“And Jonathan and Clarissa?”

The bearded man gave him an irritated look. “Jace Wayland and Clary are both positioned more or less where you’ve said you want them. Jace is back at the Institute, but his credibility is shot. No one’s going to listen to him. And Clary is soon going to find every Downworlder in the city hunting her once rumors about her ability to activate the Soul Sword spread.”

“Excellent. Well done, Jonathan.” The man who promised to help find Nana patted this ‘Jonathan’ on the neck and smiled in the way that made Madzie’s stomach hurt again. “What about relations with the Downworld?”

“In my role as Victor Aldertree, I’ve seen to it personally that the vampires have no love for the Institute’s present leadership, though Clary’s little friend remains unshakably loyal.” Jonathan clasped his hands behind his back so that the two of them stood identically, and they both resumed their stroll between the cages. “The warlocks are too independent to accurately predict what they’ll do en masse. Though they haven’t seen each other except when Alec Lightwood was comatose, the High Warlock appears to have some affection for him, which could be a matter of concern. The Seelies are as practical as ever and will gladly join in on the hunt for Clary. As for the werewolves, Luke Garroway will undermine his own control of the pack if he chooses Clary’s safety over theirs, but I can’t guarantee he won’t still be able to interfere.”

“Leave Lucian to me.” The man who promised to find Nana rapped his knuckles on the bars of a cage. “Once I’ve released these miserable creatures out onto the streets, it will look like a Downworld uprising. Be ready to clear as many Shadowhunters as possible out of the Institute, to minimize casualties. We’ll at least give them a chance to…see reason.”

“Understood, Father. I’ll wait for your signal.” Jonathan turned to leave, but a scuffle near the door stopped him. A sword appeared in his hand so quickly Madzie didn’t have a chance to see where it came from. The sound of the blade being bared sang among the decrepit carnival rides.

“It’s all right. Let him in,” called the man who was going to help find Nana. “I’ve been expecting him. Robert, it’s been a long time. You look well, old friend.” He sniffled and smiled. “The cologne is a nice touch. A clever bit of misdirection, I wonder, or did you finally find the spine to walk away from Maryse...?”

...The rage that filled Alec as Madzie broke the connection between them was unlike anything he’d ever imagined, even after all the ups and downs of this tumultuous last year. He swallowed the fury with a shudder, because he didn’t want to frighten Madzie with it. His hand shook with the effort it cost him to reach out and stroke her hair gently.

“Thank you for showing me, Madzie.” He heard the rasp in his own voice and cleared his throat, then turned toward his mother and Izzy. “Where’s Dad?”

Izzy looked back behind her into the hallway. “He’s still sitting with Max.”

“Alexander?” Magnus asked as Alec rose abruptly from the bed and brushed past Izzy on the way out the door.

“Just—just give me a minute,” he stammered, waving off the Inquisitor, who came at him with a demand on her lips. He shoved open the door to Max’s room, forcing himself not to see that sheet-covered body on the bed, and found it otherwise empty. “He’s gone.”

“Alec, what is it?” Maryse asked, her voice sounded far away even though he could feel her hand on his arm.

He forced himself not to look at Herondale. If he met her eyes, she’d know he was hiding something. He couldn’t find the equilibrium right now to try to play this off, and he didn’t know what was going to happen to their family when the truth became known.

He couldn’t make this decision alone, and he couldn’t talk to Maryse and Izzy about it with the Inquisitor standing right there.

So instead, he drew his stele and jerked up his sleeve, activated his mnemosyne rune, and reached for his mother’s wrist.

On to Chapter 20!

Please, if you’ve enjoyed this fanfic, consider buying some of my books, or buying me a cup of coffee!

#shadowhunters #malec #fanfic #my fics #a separate peace #sequel to #one easy answer #a separate peace ch19

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sunjaesol · 7 years ago

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So, this is a parallel to the dream sequence Stiles had of Lydia in 3B, only now Lydia as the POV. Angst and comfort ahead! Thanks for reading and PROMPTING REQUESTS IS OPEN! (there is an “under the cut” part, so if your text suddenly cuts off, that’s why :/ ) —————————————————

Lydia quietly stood in the dark forest of Beacon Hills. She frowned. The girl looked down and saw she was wearing the blue dress she wore on her sixteenth birthday. The air felt chilly around her bare shoulders and legs. Something shifted behind her.

She whipped her head around. 'H-hello?', she croaked out, heart stammering in her throat, threatening to pump out of her body.

She moved the bush, and she was greeted by the Nemeton. She shivered, feeling the dark, strong powers it radiated. Lydia edged closer to the trunk of wood, not knowing what to do. The branches of widowed trees whistled and hustled as she creeped towards it. The wind took up.

Lydia stared at the cut off tree, her fingertips grazing the wood. Right when she pressed her hand flat on the tree, an agonising pain rippled through her body, centring in her brain. It ripped, shredded her mind and soul apart. Lydia screamed, cold tears helplessly rolling down her cheeks. When she looked up through hooded eyes, barely being able to move, she saw Allison.

Lydia squeaked out her name. 'Allison! H-help!'

The brunette merely stared at her, a grin slowly making it on her beautiful features. A devilish laugh erupted from her lips.

'Oh, Lydia...', she shook her head as if Lydia was a dumb child. Lydia went rigid. Why was Allison acting like this? Suddenly a thought sprung up in her that made her stand still. Allison is dead. This wasn't real.

'Poor, poor Lydia...', Allison took her bow and arrow, aiming it directly at Lydia's head.

Her best friend coughed out some blood, still with a evil smile tugging at her lips.

'No one's saving you now.'

Allison shot her arrow with expertise, zooming right at Lydia. She screamed, the only sound she could hear.

Lydia sprung awake, flying forwards in her bed. She screamed in real life as well, only not in her banshee pitch.

The girl sighed exhausted, wiping the sheen of sweat of her forehead. It was a dream. Something shuffled beside her, and suddenly she felt warm lips touching her neck and callous, familiar fingers stroking her arms.

'You okay, Lydia? Nightmare?', Stiles drawled, eyes bleary. She nodded, leaning into his touch.

'Yes,' she mumbled, nudging her face in his chest, finding warmth.

'C'mere,' he whispered, placing a soft kiss on her tangled hair. Lydia smiled, cuddling into him. After a minute her eyes shot open.

'Wait,' she paused, 'Stiles... what are you doing here?' She stared at his face, the sweatpants and black tee, his eyes. They looked confused.

'What do you mean? Lydia, I'm your boyfriend.'

She frowned. What was happening.

'How adorable.' A voice snapped through the sleepy silence.

Lydia gasped, seeing Allison standing right next to her bed. Right next to Stiles.

'Go away,' she whispered, tears welling up in her eyes. Stiles frowned.

'Lydia, who are you talking to?'

Her gaze shifted to him, her voice trembling. 'You can't see her?'

'Who?'

Allison held a knife in her hand, pouting her lips.

'I lost my love, so you don't deserve love as well,' Allison whispered in menace, eyes becoming glossy.

Lydia choked on her breath, 'Allison, don't.'

But right as she said her last word, Allison sliced Stiles' throat open without mercy. The boy fell like a sack of potatoes down on the bed, his eyes wide and lifeless, the last spark diminished.

Lydia screamed.

Lydia screamed herself awake, wildly trashing in her bed and tears streaming down her face without stopping. Her headache was incredible, and her hands gripped the bed so tightly they turned a porcelain white. Natalie Martin busted through her bedroom door, scared by the sounds and her terrified daughter.

'Lydia!', she yelled, grasping her by the shoulders. The girl didn’t stop, didn’t hear her mother begging her to wake up from her never-ending nightmare.

'Lydia!', she tried again, pulling her down on the mattress so she wouldn’t hurt herself. It started working. Lydia slowly regained consciousness of her actions, opening her eyes.

'Mom?', she croaked, her voice nearly gone.

Her mother shushed her, placing her sweaty head on her shoulder. 'I'm here, I'm here…'

After her terrible dream, Lydia only slept for two more hours, as she was afraid Allison might return. They had happened before, dreams about Allison, but they never were this intense. They never got her so scared that her mom had to interfere. This nightmare was also very confusing, even for a genius like herself.

What was Stiles doing in her dream?

It had never happened before, and him being there didn’t correlate with Allison. It just didn’t make sense. She recalled what happened. He called him her boyfriend. Boyfriend.

“I lost my love, so you don’t deserve love as well.”

Lydia gulped. What did Allison mean by that? She didn’t love Stiles. Sure, as a friend. But not romantically. But Allison definitely insinuated to Scott, her love.

Lydia stood up from her bed, knees wobbly. She turned to her desk and unlocked her laptop. She typed in “dream" and clicked on the Wikipedia article. She knew Wikipedia wasn’t exactly a hundred percent reliable, and rather searched in actual books, but she was tired.

'”A dream', she read, 'is a succession of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations that usually occur involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep. The content and purpose of dreams are not fully understood, though they have been a topic of scientific speculation. Dream interpretation is the attempt at drawing meaning from dreams and searching for an underlying message. The scientific study of dreams is called oneirology.”'

She frowned and reread a certain paragraph. “Many endorse the Freudian theory of dreams – that dreams reveal insight into hidden desires and emotions.”

She desired Stiles? No. It can’t be. She only liked his presence when he helped and comforted her. Lydia smiled. That’s it. She didn’t love him, she only loved his care for her. His friendship. And she would be sad if he died, obviously, but he isn’t her lover. Her boyfriend-to-be.

Lydia glanced at her clock: 5 o'clock. In two hours she needed to start getting ready. In three hours she had to face Stiles. Abruptly, she felt a sense of dread. How can she act around him after this dream? Because truth be told, the dream felt real. She felt his touch and warmth. She felt his love for her. She craved it again. Lydia swallowed hard. She did not love him. She didn't. Besides, after all this time, why would he still want her? He's seen her flaws, realised she wasn’t the picture perfect girl he had fantasised about in the years prior. His crush had probably subsided . At least, it sure looked like it. Lydia got anxious of all her thinking.

You need to relax, she thought. Breathe, Lydia. Without wanting to, her mind was once again whisked away to Stiles. Stiles panicking in the locker room. Stiles getting kissed by her. Lydia remembered liking it. He hadn’t had much experience with kissing, but he sure knew how to kiss. She licked her lips, reminiscing how his lips felt on her. How his scent had evaded all her senses and made her always churning thoughts halt to a stop. His touch made her worries dissipate for just a second.

Lydia startled herself. What was she doing?! Just as she was convincing herself she did not like Stiles, her heart decided to throw that concept out of the window. Lydia was frustrated, and seeing as she wouldn’t fall asleep again, she decided to keep searching the web, studying on miscellaneous subjects.

Just like Stiles does, creeped in the back of her mind.

Lydia, expert in make-up and hiding her feelings, stepped into the school like she hadn’t slept less than five hours. Her make-up was perfect, hair intricately braided and a red dress that complimented her body. She smiled, had her strut down to a T and generally, looked normal. Routinely, she stepped towards Stiles' locker. It was the same ritual every school day: he would inform her what he found out and she would add on her own thoughts and speculations. It worked. They solved problems. Once they knew how to crack the code, they let the fighters (Scott, Liam, Malia) do the job as they were on look out and were used as back-up. The iron baseball bat was always on demand.

'Hey, Stiles,' she greeted him, calming her erratic heart. He doesn’t know what you dreamt, so calm down.

'Hi, Lydia,' he said, starting walk down the hall, knowing she would follow. She knew his thought were clearer when he was in motion. 'So, I researched about covens, and guess what? They can unlock our dreams.'

She halted, 'What?'

'Yeah,' he continued, nearly bumping into a buff guy, 'it’s a way to drive us to madness. I haven’t had nightmare in a while now. Did you…?', he stared at her, and she had trouble not feeling vulnerable under his warm eyes. She hated his eyes. They were amber and light and always looked at her in a way she had no words for. Which was ridiculous, as she had a very broad vocabulary.

'No,' she quipped, her voice slightly on edge. Lydia cursed herself. Stiles would certainly pick it up.

She was right, because he frowned and grasped her wrist softly.

'Lydia, did something happen last night?'

She shook her head, avoiding his eyes.

'Lydia,' he emphasised, clutching her closer so the conversation was more private. She swallowed. She couldn’t be this close to him.

Before she could say anything, the bell rang, a piercing pitch making students groan and cover their ears. Stiles hardly noticed it, he’s heard worse. They stood together in silence, as people passed them in a hurry to get to their respective classrooms. Some send them curious glances, others couldn't care less.

He placed his hands on her shoulders, forcing her to tell. He seemed to not like this method, but he needed to know. She understood. This could help the pack.

'Something happened,' she said solemnly as the last pupil slammed the door shut. They were alone. They knew a teacher would guard the halls so they went to the library, pretending to have a free period. There weren’t many studying at tables or lingering between the stacks. Perfect spot to talk.

'Tell me,' he urged.

'It was um,' she searched for the right words, 'Allison was there.'

His face fell, hardening at the same time. She knew he still blamed himself for her death, even if it wasn’t exactly him.

'She ah, was at the Nemeton. And I… got killed by her.'

He rose his eyebrows, face softening and edging his hands towards hers. An invitation to grab them. She didn't.

'Then I thought I woke up, but…', she halted. Should she tell him?

'Yeah?'

'But I was still sleeping. I woke up screaming and- and you comforted me. You were there.'

Stiles looked at her with an incredulous expression, not expecting that. He took a chance and grabbed her hands. Lydia’s breath hitched, not being prepared for that. What was he doing?

'and then-', her expression became blank as she stared into the nothingness, 'Allison was there. And she slid your throat.'

Stiles retracted his hands, and she wished he hadn’t done that.

'What does that even mean?', he asked after a minute of silence. She was grateful he didn’t press further into him being there.

'I don’t know,' she said truthfully, neglecting the research she did.

'Did she say anything?', he asked, hopeful for a clue.

'No.'

He nodded, picking his phone out of his pocket.

'I'm texting Scott to come after class.'

She rolled her lips inwards. 'Okay.' Lydia fidgeted, not something she would ever do but this boy jumbled her mind into a mess. Lydia hated not having everything sorted out, archived and labelled in her mind. She clasped his hands, his phone clanking on the wooden table.

'Thank you,' she said earnestly, 'for listening to me.'

His lips parted in surprise, hand scratching the back of his neck.

'It’s uh, nothing Lydia. I'll always listen to you.'

She bit her lip, smiled, and looked down. In her peripheral vision she could see him staring at her with the eyes she hated so much. She hated how they made her feel so safe.

'She did say something,' she said without thinking about it.

He perked up, excited, 'What did she say?'

'In the first dream, she was just teasing me. But in the second, where you were,' she swallowed, not ready for any scenario that was about to come. Lydia was great at analysing situations, making a strategy, a plan. This didn’t have any of that.

'"I lost my love, so you don’t deserve love as well.”', she quoted, having it engrained in her memory.

He jutted his lower lip outwards, eyebrows scrunched together.

'And then she killed me?'

'Yes.'

His brain seemed to clear up, looking at her wide eyed.

'Oh.'

The comment angered her. “Oh", was all he could say?

'Can you please say something,' she snapped, gripping the edge of the table.

'I don’t know what you want to hear, Lydia,’ Stiles answered earnestly, cheeks tinted a slight pink. She huffed.

'Also,' she couldn’t stop herself anymore. She had been going around school with no sleep and she was fed up with the supernatural and how they have been circling around each other since their kiss in the locker room. 'you said in the dream that you were my boyfriend. And I did my research, obviously, and some say that dreams unlock our deepest desires. I think the coven gave me a nightmare, Allison, and that my brain wanted to help me and created you,’ her voice faltered, green eyes locked on brown ones, ‘The one who always comforts me. The person who I always call first. The first person my mind could think of after a nightmare, was you.'

He stared at her, lips in a downturned smile and eyes soft. His eyes, the ones she hated, turned a honey colour. He slowly lifted his hands to her shoulders. She didn’t do anything, was yearning that touch since the nightmare.

He was at a loss for words, opened and closed his lips.

'I want to be your boyfriend,' he whispered, stroking the wisps that fell out of her braid.

She smiled, touching her forehead with his.

'I think I love you,' she said, eyes shut. She felt his warm breath bathing her face. She opened her eyes and saw him smile at her, eyes watery. It startled her. Lydia has never seen him this emotional. Then again, she must also look completely different from her normal facial expressions.

Without a word, his arms slid over her shoulder and embraced her tightly, Lydia doing as well.

'I love you too,' he whispered in her neck, lips grazing her skin. She shuddered, loving how close he was.

She retracted, cupping his cheeks. His eyes never looked as bright as they were now. She loved his eyes.

With that, her lips met his with fervour they both had never experienced before.

#stydia one shots #my work #my works #stydia fanfiction #canon divergence #stiles x lydia #teen wolf #otp: remember i love you #fluff #angst #comfort #friends to lovers #dream sequence

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darkelysian-blog · 7 years ago

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Stydias and Stereks

This is the only post I’ll ever be making regarding teen wolf simply because I don’t care enough to be associated with the toxic fandom. I’m making this post because it’s something I've noticed when it came to the two big ships, Stydia and Sterek. Don’t take it personally and don’t say, I’m not like that because I’m speaking in general.

Okay, the first thing that bothers me is that Sterek and Stydia shippers like to point fingers, they like to whine and complain that one side is ridiculous and crazy and disgusting, but what they don’t realize is the extreme hypocrisy.

Let’s start off with Sterek. When Teen Wolf first started, Sterek was the biggest ship. It’s what brought in viewers every week(sadly, since the show had nothing to do with Sterek), and it’s what kept the fandom alive and thriving, I guess you can say. With popularity comes with a bunch of bad apples that turn the fandom rotten. A lot of people now love to forget or act like the extreme racism within the fandom never happened. They love to forget that the Sterek fandom had harassed the cast constantly, especially the lead actor, Tyler Posey. The Sterek fandom went as far as asking Jeff to kill off his character so Stiles or Derek could be the main character, sending Posey death threats, making fun of his depression and even made disgusting comments regarding his mother who was struggling with cancer at the time. A lot of this hatred stemmed from a comment Posey had said about their fictional pairing, his exact words being,”I think Sterek is, um, a bizarre, weird, twisted thing, and I think anyone who pays more attention to Sterek than the show, uhm, isn’t watching the show for the right reasons.” Might I add, Sterek had already been harassing Posey beforehand and had treated him with lack or respect, so my point is, if you want to earn respect, you have to give it, and in this case, the Sterek fandom hadn’t given that respect so they sure as hell don’t deserve it from Posey. The Sterek fandom is what the Stydia fandom is now, mean and callous and whoever doesn’t agree with your ship, then they’re wrong. A lot of people perceived his comment as homophobic when it isn’t. It’s an opinion on a fictional gay ship, and I would say that Posey could’ve been nicer, but they were never too kind to him. Maybe that’s petty on my part, but people shouldn’t expect respect if they can’t give it themselves. Part of the reason why Posey had gotten so much hate is that of racism, because before this comment was even made he had faced extreme hate from the fandom and was often compared to his white co stars, Dylan O’brien and Tyler Hoechlin. Now I went on about this fandom long enough, I think it’s time to go on to Stydia.

As Teen Wolf comes to an end, Stydia happens to be the biggest ship, (or loudest ship) within the fandom. The Stydia fandom had become loud, rude and somewhat overbearing. They constantly harass the cast members, wanting any information that has to do with Stydia, often disregarding the storyline and other characters itself. There’s a disgusting amount of misogyny within the fandom, the shippers sending death threats and hateful comments towards Shelley Hennig when she first joined the show. Her character, Malia, was often sidelined and many of the shippers hated both her and Shelley simply because of a fictional pairing. One of the writers of the show, Will Wallace, was even attacked simply because he preferred Stalia’s storyline over Stydia, which is wrong. I can’t stress enough how disrespectful that is. And let's not forget the amount of homophobia I’ve witnessed, one person going as far as saying, “homophobia is okay if it’s against Sterek shippers.” That is utter bullshit and the worst thing a person could say about someone. And yes, I will not ignore that this fandom is racist as well, shippers going as far as wanting Scott killed off just so their fictional ship could rise. This fandom constantly sidelines Posey as well as the Sterek fandom and often disrespects other cast members and/or characters they feel as though they get in the way of their ship. And let’s go back to the point of misogyny since this is the fandoms biggest issue(other than them hating on anyone who doesn’t ship Stydia). I often saw Stydia shippers hating on Malia because of the rumored romance between her and Scott simply because Malia was Kira’s friend. The double standards within the fandom are absolutely ridiculous and quite embarrassing. I have hardly seen any shippers speaking up about the fact that Lydia will now be dating Stiles even though Malia and Lydia are clearly friends(And I really don’t care that Kira was written out of the show, she was still an important character). I have hardly seen anyone call Scott out for dating Malia even though he dated Kira who happened to be Malia’s friend(I guess it’s the cool thing to share boyfriend and girlfriends within the show). The number of times I’ve seen Stydia shippers praise Stiles for being in love with Lydia all while dating Malia is through the roof and it’s wrong on so many levels.

Anyways, I think Stydia and Sterek shippers wouldn’t be so bad if they just owned up to the fact that their fandom is not perfect, and call out the unfairness of both sides because while you guys continue to fight, you’re not even realizing the hypocrisy that you’re spewing out. Stop pointing fingers and whining like children over a fictional ship and point out the very real issues that almost every fandom faces, which is misogyny, racism, and homophobia. (And no, I am not hating on these two groups and I think everyone is allowed to ship what they ship and love what they love, but I wanted to call out the issues that I feel are very real)

#sterek #stydia #anti sterek #anti stydia #teen wolf #anti teen wolf #malia tate #scott mccall #stiles stilinski #lydia martin #tyler posey #dylan o'brien #tyler hoechlin

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justjimedits · 5 years ago

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“Scott violated Derek’s agency, bodily autonomy and consent because he is a true hero! Scott did it for the greater good, really! Derek took it well”

https://princeescaluswords.tumblr.com/post/190965018335/gee-why-wont-scott-just-submit-to-derek#notes

@liliaeth:

I was going through some older pro-scott posts, and of course a Scott hater had to come on the post to whine about it.

One of the things that hit me, was their claim that they ‘liked Scott in s1, but that in s2 ‘Scott didn’t ask for help’, and ‘helped everyone except for Derek’

And it made me remember that when they say that, what they actually meant was ‘Scott didn’t submit to Derek’

See, in s1, Scott despite Derek’s bad behavior, was desperate enough to accept Derek’s ‘help’, put up with Derek’s abuse, and despite Stiles advising it against him, let Derek ‘train’ him. Which basically came down to letting Derek beat him up in a way that was in no way helpful to actually teaching Scott how to control his shift.

But what these people forget, is that by the end of s1, Derek betrayed Scott. not just in Code Breaker, which if you stretch canon, can be claimed to be for Scott’s own good. (you know if you ignore the lying, manipulation and so on…)

But no, Code Breaker wasn’t the real problem. ‘Co-Captain’ was. Derek went with Stiles to the clinic to find out who’d sent that text to Allison to lure her to the school, and found out that Peter was the alpha.

At that point Derek had a choice, to keep standing up to Peter, but he didn’t.

So when Scott next faced Derek, he was shocked to find out that not only was Peter the Alpha, but to see Derek stand there and side with Peter. To have Derek stand by and do nothing as Peter violated Scott, and forced his memories of the fire into Scott’s mind. And even worse… they then left this half naked sixteen year old boy writhing on the floor after this assault, abandoning him to anyone who might have found him there.

Could you imagine how many fics there would be about that utter horrifying betrayal, if it had happened to Derek? Or hell, to Stiles? Or Isaac?

But because it happened to Scott, most people seem to utterly forget it, and then they wonder why in s2, Scott didn’t trust Derek, and wouldn’t accept him as his Alpha?

And to go back to Codebreaker. I’m saying that the betrayal in Code Breaker wasn’t as bad as the one in Co-Captain, but it came on top of the first one. Especially since it happened after Scott was still willing to save Derek, despite Stiles trying to get in the way of it. Scott risked himself, knowing the Argents were already after him, to go save Derek from them.

And to then find out that either Derek had lied to him about a cure all along, or he really didn’t know it wasn’t a cure, and then took Scott’s only hope of a cure away from him. Either option is just as horrifyingly bad. Yet at no point did Derek try to explain himself, or apologize in anyway..

So then we come to s2.

Derek has betrayed Scott, he has basically made it clear he can’t be trusted in any real way. And on top of that in s201 Gerard makes it clear that he’s throwing out the Code. That he’ll kill any werewolf in town, regardless of age, regardless of how or why they got the bite. Scott knows that Derek heard this threat, since Derek was holding him back from saving that Omega.

And to then find out that, regardless of this clear threat to any werewolf in town, Derek decided to manipulate three other teens into taking the bite, directly risking their lives. (and as we find out later from Boyd, he didn’t fully explain this threat to them) To not even start on Derek’s treatment of Jackson, or Derek’s attempted murder of Lydia.

Yet somehow, all of that, still isn’t seen as reason enough for Scott to not just submit to Derek, and do whatever Derek tells him to? Scott is supposed to just submit to this violent abusive white man, who has done nothing to Scott, but betray him, endanger other kids Scott knows as classmates and make stupid mistake after stupid mistake, with no plan whatsoever to deal with Gerard?

People complain that Scott trusted Theo in 5a, yet based on the information Scott actually had, Theo did more to earn Scott’s trust in 5a, than Derek ever did in s1-s3a.

And this is where fanon becomes the problem. because most fanfics don’t deal with canon Derek; They don’t deal with creepy violent abusive anti-hero Derek of s1 or full on villain Derek of s2. They try and paint him as this sweet stoic guy who meant well, ignoring his actual behavior. And showing more sympathy for the full grown white man, than they do for the Latino teenager who has to put up with Derek’s horrible treatment of him.

Because of this, they also ignore that the easiest solution for Scott, to get rid of both Derek and Gerard, and the threat they both posed to him, would have been to use them against one another.

All Scott had to do, was tell Gerard where Derek was hiding. Simple solution, hand Derek over to Gerard; hell, in Battlefield, Gerard was threatening not just Scott’s Mom, Scott’s best friend, and everyone else on or around the field. And Scott had already been told by Isaac that Boyd and Erica had already run off, so as far as he knew they’d have been safe. All Scott had to do was tell Gerard the location of Derek’s hide out, and send Gerard after Derek.

Scott already knew that the moment Gerard managed to get the bite from Derek, that he’d be taken down.

Easy fix, easy sollution.

But did Scott do so? No. Despite the threat, Scott still refused to give up and/or betray derek.

Because despite everything Derek had done to him and others, Scott still cared about him, and wanted to protect him.

But I guess that doesn’t matter, does it?

@brydeswhale:

I sort of worry about, like, what do these people treat the people in their lives like and how do those people treat them?

We’re talking people who think that a high school kid should just give in to the every whim and demand of an abusive older man, and about people who think said abusive older man shoving a kid’s head into a dashboard is the height of romance.

Something is very wrong here.

@liliaeth:

It becomes especially noticeable when you start looking at the s1 or s2 fixit tags on ao3.

Because in their ‘fix its’ what needs to be fixed, isn’t Derek’s bad behavior.

Derek’s behavior is glossed over, or it’s treated as the right way to treat betas, or ‘Derek is just being a harsh drill sergeant to ‘protect’ his betas’

In their fix its, Scott ‘ happily’ submits to Derek (and then fades into the background, where in their opinion he belongs as one of the Greek chorus of betas who are just there to show how important and leaderly Derek is.)

Their fix its have Scott, and/or Boyd and Erica grovelling to Derek for forgiveness for not just doing what the oh so great white man tells them to. And then utterly ignores their concerns, because Boyd, Scott’s or Erica’s concerns about Derek don’t matter. All that matters is poor woobie Derek’s feelings.

I’ve seen several fics where Melissa makes Scott apologize to Derek and just makes him do what Derek tells him to. And fics like that make me scared of what kind of parents they have. Because if at age 16 my Mom had ever found out that a full grown man treated me the way Derek did Scott, she’d have called the cops on him, and possibly beaten the crap out of him if she wouldn’t have full on killed him herself.

@princeescaluswords:

Some of the blame for the pervasive idea that Scott was unfair to Derek lies with the production itself. The writers and producers thought it was self-evident that Derek had gone full-on villain in Season 2 – that he was one of the people that Scott had to overcome.

It started with the death of Peter at the end of Season 1. That entire scene wasn’t shot as Derek killing his uncle out of necessity or as a way to protect others. Peter was helpless on the ground, and Scott was begging Derek in the background. Derek hesitated in the face of Scott’s begging, but neither did he explain why he couldn’t let Scott do it. There was no urgency. Derek was angry and vengeful, which is what Peter meant when he said “You’ve already decided. I can smell it on you.” It’s an interesting choice of words unless you take them at their connotation – Derek had always intended to kill Peter since Scott’s revelation of Peter’s culpability.

And then there’s the two shots – Derek’s ominous “I’m the Alpha Now” and his wordless biting of Jackson. We’re meant to believe that Derek’s going to be a villain in Season 2. I mean, they even had the Argents lay it out:

Victoria: “What about Scott?”

Chris: “I’m not the only one he has to worry about now.”

In Season 2, Derek doesn’t get any better. He screws up with Isaac in Shape Shifted (2x02). His skeevy seduction of Erica in Ice Pick (2x03). His brutal beating of Scott (including using claws and stepping on his neck) after he sends teenagers to beat up other teenagers in Ice Pick. His abandonment of Jackson when he thinks he’s going to die in Omega (2x01). His shattering Isaac’s bones and his callous pimping of Erica in Abomination (2x04). His mafia-boss impression during the kidnapping of Stiles in Abomination and Jackson in Venomous (2x05). His insistence on killing Lydia and his assault on the McCall house in Venomous. His attempted execution of Jackson in Frenemy (2x06). His embrace of his uncle – AGAIN – after being warned not to. His lying to his pack in both Battlefield (2x11) and Master Plan (2x12).

When Scott said “You might be an alpha, but you’re not mine,” the production believed that it was a comeuppance – a consequence of Derek’s behavior ever since he declared himself alpha. It went hand-in-hand with the theme that being hurt by others doesn’t justify you hurting others, same as with Peter, Deucalion, Gerard, Jennifer, etc. Derek took it well, which is why Derek and Scott were allies in Season 3 and beyond.

The production simply didn’t comprehend how far fandom would go to champion a good-looking white man with a sad backstory. It doesn’t matter that he got Boyd, Erica, and Isaac into a middle of a war they had nothing to do with. It doesn’t matter if Derek was just as brutal and manipulative (only far less successful) than Gerard. All that mattered was that Derek was attractive and that his scenes with Stiles were funny.

And when they say “Scott didn’t care about Derek!” they just ignore all the scenes where Scott tries to talk to Derek – in Episodes 201, 202, 203, 204, and 205. Five straight episodes where Scott tried to get Derek to stop doing this, and five episodes where Derek told Scott to fuck off.

It was all about submission of a hero of color to a white male villain, even as the hero embodied the themes of the show (all life has value and vengeance is pointless) and the villain rejected them.

#submission #not adding anything to it #too tired to think #Teen Wolf discussion

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hiddlesgirl · 8 years ago

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SH 109: Rise Up

This episode, and the previous one, is making me like Jace more now and we get to see a more vulnerable side to Izzy. I loved some of the back and forth between characters and we get a really well done (more like medium rare, I’m sorry) fight scene.

We begin with Raphael catching up to a very scared Simon; he is terrified of what he has become and what his life will be now. When he was kidnapped he saw one of the worst sides of vampires so it is understandable that he has resentment towards them and Raphael; after all Raphael was the one who kidnapped him. He sees them as monsters, so thinks that he is a monster too. Raphael tells him that the clan are his family and the Hotel DuMort is his home now which Simon immediately rejects. I totally understand this, the Hotel DuMort is where he was keep prisoner and drugged by Camille, and it is where he died; it obviously has negative association for him. After getting frustrated and throwing Raphael he runs away, it is clear that he is scared of who he is and what he is capable of.

Raphael explains to Clary and Jace that Simon is experiencing his own personal hell right now and will need time to adjust to his new life. Clary feels guilty that she was the one who made the decision; she thought she was making the right choice by giving Simon another chance to live but seeing Simon’s reaction makes her doubt if her decision was the best thing for Simon. We also find out that Simon doesn’t remember that it was Clary who made the decision, so she has to decide if she is going to tell him the truth as Simon thinks it was Raphael who turned him and right now he needs Raphael to help him transition into the life of a vampire.

Magnus is back! He is adding wards to the institute to slow down any other Forsaken that Valentine may send. He offers to help heal Alec wound which Alec rejects and physical pulls away from Magnus despite Magnus not actually touching him; as he does this he looks around to make sure no one is watching the exchange. It is obvious that he is concerned about what the other Shadowhunters think and doesn’t want them to get suspicious about his possible feelings for Magnus, and toward the male gender in general. Magnus lets it go and asks where he can find Lydia; Alec gives a short answer and walks away. Magnus is clearly a little hurt by the cold shoulder Alec is giving him, especially after Alec seemed to be opening up to him the previous episode. But as usual Magnus doesn’t pressure Alec and is very understanding.

Meliorn is brought to the institute for questioning because the Clave suspects the Seelies are working with Valentine after it was discovered that the Forsaken has Seelie blood which is part angel, which allowed them to get past the wards. Izzy tries to defended him and suggests that blood from the dead scouts was used in the forsaken’s creation; but without evidence Lydia isn’t interested. We get to see a more vulnerable side to Izzy, despite her breaking up with Meliorn she doesn’t want him to get hurt for something she believes he would never do. Plus she feels guilty because it is partially because of his association with her that has caused him to be under scrutiny.

Alec reveals to Izzy and Alec that their parents used to part of the Circle and they were the ones to tarnish the Lightwood family name. Jace says that he knows when kind of people they are, but at the moment all Alec can think about is that after all the pressure his parents of been putting on him to fix the family reputation that were the one to break it; they are pressuring him to right their wrongs. Jace and Izzy also find out about Alec and Lydia’s engagement and they aren’t thrilled. Izzy tells Alec that it’s his life to ruin and you can understand her reaction, all this time she has supported Alec, tried to get him to accept himself and to refuse their parents when they were trying to marry him off because she knows that it would make him miserable. She knows that by doing this he is condemning himself to a life of repression and unhappiness.

Simon has gone home probably in a vain hope of feeling safe after everything that has happened; how he almost bites his mother which causes him to freak out to the point of tears. He hates the thought that he could have hurt or killed his own mother. Luke tries to reassure Simon that he will feel better in time but Simon is understandably sceptical. Clary also reveals that it was her decision to turn him, he is distraught. He doesn’t understand why Clary would choose to make him live this undead life where he has to drink blood to survive, he feels slightly betrayed that she made he become part of this world he never wanted to associate with.

The entire institute is looking for the Cup after Meliorn revealed that Clary has it, but Jace manages to persuade Alec to let Clary hand it over. Jace and Izzy then enlist Magnus’ help to steal Alec’s stele so that they can take the Cup from the safe and get it to Clary. Magnus is reluctant at first, it is clear that he has some feelings for Alec and doesn’t want to work against him or do anything to hurt him but he knows that right now the best place for the Cup is with Clary, not the Clave so he agrees.

Alec tells Magnus that he getting married Lydia and Magnus in this scene destroys my heart every time. Magnus has been putting his heart out there to encourage a response from Alec because he knows that Alec hasn’t accepted himself yet and this scene is like Alec throwing all that care back in his face. He is devastated and disappointed that after everything he has done to encourage Alec to accept his feelings Alec has decided to reject that part of himself to make his parents happy; that Alec is marrying for a ‘solid partnership’ and not love grates on Magnus. It is the first time we see Magnus be anything other than gentle with Alec, he lets his emotions make him callous towards Alec trying to mask his hurt with quick jibes and disparaging words. He clearly does not approve of Alec decision but as usual he doesn’t pressure or force him in anyway and instead walks away from him, his ‘Goodbye Alexander’ sounds quite final (I need some tissues, crying here).

Meliorn is being taken to Silent Borthers to be questioned but it could kill him, Alec asks Lydia if she is sure it is the right thing to do. Lydia reveals the circumstances behind John’s death and that she prevented the torture of a Downworlder who may have information; John died because they went in blind. I understand that Lydia blames herself for John’s death and doesn’t want history to repeat itself ‘we rule with our heads, not with our hearts’ but she is turning a blind eye to the fact that they will be torturing a potential innocent as they have no evidence that his working with Valentine. She is letting her guilt and loyalty to the Clave blind her to the awful that they are about to inflict.

I love that Clary creates an alliance between the werewolves, vampires, seelies and themselves to save Meliorn. They know that if they let Meliorn be tortured the Clave will be stepping over a line, repeating past mistakes and the Downworld won’t be safe; their aim should be working together to defeat Valentine not tear each other apart needlessly. They are stronger together. I also like in this scene that Simon agrees to Raphael’s terms because he wants to do anything he can to protect the Downworld, it’s his world now and he is ready to fight to protect it. Despite him being scared and unsure right now he is still incredibly brave and wants to protect this new world he has become a part of.

I love the exchange between Luke and Raphael, it always makes me laugh. After the confortation caused by a werewolf shoving Simon he says that he should get used to people hating him because of who he is and Clary replies ‘never get used to it’ and I love the message it sends plus the multiple ways it translates to real life. No matter who you are you should never expect or get used to people hating you for it.

They are surprised to see Alec leading Meliorn but it doesn’t halt their plan; Clary tries to persuade Alec to see that by torturing Meliron they are going too far and that sometimes orders shouldn’t be followed. Alec replies that she doesn’t understand, he has always been taught to follow the orders of the Clave no matter what and in light of recent events he is trying to do the best he can, to be the best Shadowhunter he can to fix what his parents broke; but it is blinding him to the fact that it is wrong to subject someone to torture without evidence.

When Clary fails Jace attacks Alec and they fight. It’s a really good fight; dynamic, well choreographed and it looks real. Jace says that Alec’s recent behaviour is because of Alec feelings for him which is why he is so against Clary too; I personally disagree, yes Alec’s feelings for Jace affect him but his recent actions are because of the revelation about their parents. All his life it has been drilled into his that he has to be the best, to follow the rules and to live up to the Lightwood name, now he is getting pressure to restore their reputations when it was their parent’s who tarnished it to being with. He feels like his whole life has been a lie and is trying to do what he thinks is right to do right by his family and restore their reputation; but he doesn’t see the harm he is causing with his actions. Jace says the he doesn’t want to be alive if they are on different sides and we really get to see the emotional toll this is taking on him, his parabatai is pulling away from him and acting out of character; Alec has always been there for him, been his rock, and that has all changed in a short space of time. Jace asks Alec to go with him, to fight Valentine the right way, without hurting innocent people. But Alec doesn’t want to be considered a traitor like their parents were; he is trying to be better than they were so he says no. You can see the negative affect that this rift between them is causing to both of them; they both look lost and scared at this divide between them.

Simon has accepted his new life and doesn’t blame Clary, what’s done is done. He wants to figure his new life and how to control his urges and abilities; after Clary leaves you can see that he is still scared of his new life and of the place Raphael tells him is home but all he associates it with is his ordeal.

I’m a little confused about Izzy and Meliorn’s relationship, I presumed it was a mutually beneficial friends with benefits thing but their kiss is quite intimate and suggests that they are more than that. I don’t know, we’ll have to see their future interactions.

Meliorn thanks Clary for her help and admits being surprised by their efforts to help him; it is further confirmation that the relationship between Shadowhunters and Downworlders has been far from good in the past. He tells Clary that he can help her find her father.

I liked this episode; we got more of an insight to Lydia, a heartbreaking Malec scene and some funny back and forth between Luke and Raphael.

#SHRewatch #Rise Up #Shadowhunters #Shadowhunters Review #Shadowhunters Rewatch #SH109 #SH 109 Review #SH 109 #Shadowhunters 109 #shadowhunters 1x09

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