#And taking a selfie like a Facebook mom

[raeohli]

He is literally the dad of the squad✋️😅🤍🤍🤗

[liverpool-enjoyer]

new hair! (actually a touched up version a the old hair but whatever)

[unspuncreature]

obi-wan would take selfies like those facebook moms. you know what i’m talking about right

[dorabellingham]

red flag and green flags of Jude based on his mannerisms and vibes : green flags: romantic, touchy, would give you countless hugs, loves to cuddle, love amusement parks, loves chilling at home, has only like 2 real best friends so he will dedicate a lot of time to you, will dedicate goals to you, is the type to take care of the bill ( I mostly think this because I don’t think he would make Toby split when he goes to eat with him since he obviously has more money and can handle it) , will let you borrow his clothes ( I also think this cause he lets Toby use his clothes🤣), will want you to talk to him A LOT, he looks like the type to hold your purse or give you a piggy back ride dkw), he will constantly send you tiktoks( I think this because his alleged reposts are sometimes the same as toby’s so I’m guessing they send each other TikTok’s), will always take pictures of you together ( he takes a lot of selfies so ..), THATS ALL I CAN THINK OF RN🚩 RED FLAGS 🚩 will be very clingy( he’s always hugging up on someone ) , will be very possessive, ( he’s very protective of his family and calls them his three hearts so just imagine what your heart will be to him), has a bit of history of alleged flings,( at the end of day this could be false cause I saw somewhere that Gabriela was a school friend of Toby or they met in college can’t remember but someone showed a facebook pic of her very young and Toby so idk, but I can’t explain other flings like hotel girl and the Mayweather ex girl so who knows what true or not ), will be sassy ( needs no explanation) , he will never say it’s his fault ( he literally never doesn’t argue with referees), he would be very territorial ( he’s litterly backs vini all the time ), you would prolly be his second mom 😭, he loves to be pampered, would need someone to cook his favorite meals, you would have to be the man in the relationship, prolly doesn’t know how to even wash the dishes, he would FaceTime you all the time to know where you at, looks like the type to not want pets, would manipulate you make him do what he says, would prolly mess up your plans because he wants more attention from you, he would prolly move fast in the relationship once you both are committed to each other, would not give you space sometimes when you need it and act like the victim, will prolly make you drive until he gets his license 😭 THATS IT for now . if you couldn’t tell i was bored 🥱

!!!!

[obsessive-evie]

GF KATE HEADCANONS

go thank @iminlovewithpaigebueckers, i also completely stole the formatting from her. ty twin

gf!kate def overheard you say/like a post that said hey mamas or mama, so she waits until she has you a little cocky to call you mamas just to see what happens it becomes her new addiction, especially lil mamas

gf!kate is a little shit

gf!kate sends you little facebook mom selfies whenever she travels

^^and/or vlogs and recaps when you guys can’t ft

gf!kate will learn your whole skincare routine just in case you need her to do it when you’re drunk

gf!kate appreciates feminine things and girly things: “i like that little sparkle, the white glitter it’s pretty,” while pointing to your inner corner highlight.

“you smell good,” when she catches you in passing or just when you’ve finished getting ready.

will sit on your bed helping you choose outfits… and will also cover her eyes when you get changed, all panicked just in case you don’t wanna be seen. doesn’t matter if you tell her it’s fine (she’s literally seen every inch of your skin) she’s sitting there with her hands over her eyes no peeking (maybe a single peek)

gf!kate will actually respect if you wanna pay or dress more masculine, she gets it. no stereotypes here!!

gf!kate will braid or curl your hair just to show her love and stare at you

^^^ for my textured hair girlies this includes how to do your edges!!! what products she needs to use on you!! how much!!!!

gf!kate is very white. gf kate will not understand certain slang or terms until you explain it to her. gf kate gets excited when she uses said slang correctly

gf!kate would make an attempt to read your favorite book when she’s traveling (i said attempt idk if she’s finish it i don’t know if she’s a reader or not) in my head she is simply bc i read a book a day and i make the rules here

gf!kate will also try your music taste!!

gf!kate loves buying her girl lingerie. she doesn’t give a FUCK abt prices or if you’re nervy. kinda goes with the femininity thing, she’d like to see you in lacey things and pretty colors and such

gf!kate is the biggest hype woman, genuinely thinks you are perfect (BUT IS STILL A WOMAN AND WILL UNDERSTAND HORMONES AND INSECURITIES)

gf!kate is a fan of traditional things: flowers, treating her girl to date nights she plans, she’s always driving, lowkey would ask your parent/parent figure/ important person in your life to marry you, not in a possessive way but in the way that she thinks it’s polite and necessary

gf!kate loves visiting her girls family, and they love her, no matter how crazy they are

gf!kate can fixate on your boobs or thighs or hips and just lay and kiss for forever they’re her fav place to nap, and let’s be real my girls napping a lot

gf!kate likes to hover and stare and just watch you do your thing in your habitat (you call her national geographic for a reason)

NSFW

gf kate lovesssss to give head, she just loves making you feel good and making you squirm, she also loves hearing you get loud, won’t ask you to be loud tho. but she’ll never tell you to not cover your mouth if you try to cover it, she just takes it as you trying to stay comfortable

gf kate will braid your hair before fucking you so she has something to pull 🫣

gf kate tries really hard to stay more controlling when she’s topping but she still gets shy sometimes and is also dying (she’s so turned on she can barely think)

gf kate is kind of afraid to be mean to you, she just feels too bad

gf kate will never proposition sex, she might hint at it or have that look in her eye, but she’d rather sit and be horny than ask you when you don’t want to

gf kate would go so far as to get herself off in the bathroom or shower just so she doesn’t bother you if she knows you’re not in the mood or on your period

gf kate gets worked up fast but tries to take it slower to make her girl feel good

gf kate likes phone calls and guided/mutual masterbation

gf kate takes a whilleeeeee to stop being shy when you top, specifically when you go down on her she’s so nervous and can’t look at you (go check out my fic if you like this one)

gf kate cannot handle it when you kiss her neck, like at all. especially when she’s fucking you if you kiss her neck she’d get all breathy and try to pretend like she doesn’t keep stalling and pausing her thrusts

gf kate also cannot handle it when you bite or kiss her shoulders, arms, and back. like that’s the way to get her to melt

gf kate will eat her girl out to hozier, fuck her girl to hozier, and let her girl fuck her to hozier

gf kate is adorable

[pixiesndberries]

𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄 141 ─ 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐏𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄

CHARACTERS : captain price, ghost, soap, gaz, and alejandro

WARNINGS : non, this is literally me just making fun of what i think.

AUTHOR'S NOTE : idek what led me to thinking what phones do they even have.

JOHN PRICE :

; this man would have a nokia and not give a fuck about it, he's walking around with a heavy looking ass nokia from the ancient times and won't give a shit about everyone.

gaz and soap would 100 % make fun of him behind his back and would literally died laughing if they saw price using it, HIM AND SOAP WOULD JUST GO "HAHAHAHAHA" and price would look at them up and down judging their whole living and they would go "don't laugh,you can't laugh." to each other.

in the end of the day, gaz decided to give price a new phone and thought him how to use it like a grandpa and grandchild typa bonding.

GHOST :

; he probably doesn't have a phone but soap decided to convince him having one and he did, he definitely don't know what to get and price suggested for him to get a nokia. No jokes.

He wouldn't find it funny at all but he thinks that phone is reliable about everything since he's not the type of guy to be in the internet or bugging around taking photos of whatever. So he did buy one, not just the one that looks like nokia from ancient times that price has.

"what the hell" soap would die laughing seeing him having a keypad phone and ghost would be just "😐" like he doesn't give a fuck at all he wouldn't care what people think using that kind of phone these days.

He definitely had a black keypad phone.

SOAP :

; he definitely has a black iphone x, i can feel it and i can sense it.

he isn't the type of person to buy a new phone if the one he currently have is still working, he's the type of guy who would say "what do i need a new phone for?" then has a broken screen.

His phone would be filled with candid photos of ghost, price and anyone in the base and laughs about it at night. Definitely takes photos like a Facebook mom, ghod with that sunglasses. He felt so fucking superior about it.

HE PLAYS CLASH OF CLANS AND CANDY CRUSH ‼️

gaz would show him the new features of the recent iphones and would be convinced to buy a new one.

GAZ :

; this man would have two phones, Samsung and iPhone. He probably has some of the recent models but if the one he uses still working he wouldn't mind buying a new one.

definitely play games like shooting games or so whatever.

he would take photos of some aesthetic type scenery shit and would be so freaking proud of it, has an Instagram account and would post photos like this :

would be an internet all around guy.

(OUT OF TOPIC BUT I AM INLOVE WITH ELLIOT KNIGHT ‼️😍🥰😘)

ALEJANDRO :

; definitely has an iphone, I don't have a specific imagination what model though but i think he will be just like soap. If it's still working then he'll stick with it 🤷🏻‍♀️

definitely has photos of rudy and him in his phone, has dog photos too that he shows off to rudy.

HAS DATING APPS NO JOKE.

He loves selfies C'MON LIKE he be posing and feels so freaking hot about it, DEFINITELY SHOWS IT TO RUDY YES.

Has an Instagram and post photos like this :

DAD SELFIES FOREVER RAHHHH 🤯😵

─ REBLOGS, LIKES, AND COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED. FEEL FREE TO REQUEST!

[jillvalentine]

re: my relationship with my abuser, currently @/gwendaria (part one?)

[edit: new usernames + accounts since this post has been made: scarymovies, walkingdeads, samcarpenters, the-mummy]

My abusive ex has unfortunately been going full-on with the latest DARVO / smear campaign, and this time it seems to have reached a few people. These callouts are made-up, and they've been popping up continuously in different forms since early 2021 in an attempt to silence or smear me, regardless of their inconsistencies. One second I'm an emotionally abusive gaslighter who they've finally been freed from. The next, I'm someone they don't even know about. The next... I'm a renown stalker. The next... I'm a random girl who got romantically obsessed with them and turned into a terf when I got rejected. The neeeext... I'm a terf stalker racist? Okay! I don't even know anymore. There's definitely more.

I mostly want to focus on the facts. The facts are that I've shared about my experiences enough that I shouldn't have to entertain stupid shit anymore. There will always be the next narrative, more scandalous than the last. Going forward, I just want to make the evidence more accessible so that anyone can find it.

I still have all of our texts, discord logs, whatsapp logs, voicemails, facebook messages, hundreds of screenshots from me and from others (onlookers & other people who have been harmed), and I've become friends with people who have also been friends with or intimate with this person and came out from the other side (some are public and others aren't, because, hey! Look what happened to me after I came out. I have been stalked almost on the hourly for about 4 years now, and I know it won't stop, because I know exactly who my abuser is.)

About 3 years have passed now, so a lot of the 'big' conversations or screenshots I shared earlier on when I spoke out about what had happened to me have been buried in time. (but they are, still there.)

Screenshots where they ragged on and on about my friends, about me being naïve and that I'd know better when I was "a real adult" like them, telling me to drop dead, telling me about slitting their wrists, telling me that someone was messaging them about 'cumming on my face' after I posted (1) selfie. Blocking me everywhere for a bit over that selfie. Unblocking me. Yelling at me. Blocking and unblocking me again because I said something about how they were being awful to me. Rinse and repeat with the next insane shit.

This was during covid lockdown, and it was 24/7. I couldn't fucking breathe. I got questioned about going to the supermarket with my mom. I got mindfucked for not explicitly saying I was back home when I said I was getting the mail, under the guise of caring so much about me, of course.

One time, I sent a snap of these leggings I liked online. Because the photo sent as a file instead of a normal-full-screen-just-taken snap, it became a whole argument of "Did you share this with anyone else?" and I would be like... what would be wrong if I did? Why is it wrong for me to send a photo of some leggings I think look good to a friend to get her opinion? A lot of conflict happened this way. They were incredibly controlling and suffocating, all under the claims of past trauma, undiagnosed mental illness, and most of all - flowery apologies or proclamations.

I used to think I was able to push through anything that happened because they would apologize to me, and it made it okay again. I genuinely thought they just needed someone to give them a chance to heal and get better, or get back to how they used to be early on in the relationship. I wanted to be that someone, I wanted to be strong enough to take all of it and be okay at the end. It gradually got worse, and I found myself trapped in the relationship. Anytime I was close to getting away, I would get drawn back with push-and-pull manipulation tactics. If I had pulled away to recover from their mistreatment, I was then the one apologizing for having had to pull away, and how bad that pulling away had affected them. How awful I was and how much I regretted being affected by anything. I would blame anything else (it wasn't you, it was my own anxiety) to make things calm down.

I didn't see any of this coming from the start. It was a gradual process. Near the end, I was googling things about how to fix toxic relationships (it didn't work because the relationship wasn't a two-way street, it was abusive), trying to think for 5 different people to avoid outbursts, trying to explain away how someone might gaslight and manipulate others without it being fully conscious and intended. I found out it was 100% intentional when I got out. They were telling others that I was doing to them what they were doing to me, along with a bunch of other bullshit to pre-emptively plant seeds.

Gwen frequently tries to use the worst buzz words to create stories and alienate people from one another. She doesn't care about any social issues. What she likes or dislikes is entirely based on what she needs to get out of a situation. If someone she's fixating on positively likes xyz thing, she likes it too. If someone she's fixating on negatively likes or dislikes something, she'll do the opposite. She constantly invented stories and tried to frame people I'd known for years, or anyone who dared to interact with my posts anywhere. She literally impersonated people and had accounts hacked. All she does is obsess over people. She constantly monitored me and created conflict over anything, real or made up. She especially liked to create conflict when it was late, or when I was otherwise not-fully-there, like when I was drugged following a surgery. I was so out-of-it that at that point I didn't want to fight for myself or others anymore.

Near the end of the relationship, I had a private account that I would hide on because social media, and really anything social, had become a minefield. Multiple people had witnessed the change from before the relationship, the start of it, up to the end. I deactivated my main twitter for a period of time (although I was careful enough to reactivate it once every 30 days so it wouldn't be permanently lost) and had to ignore people, stop myself from posting or liking things, and plead with people not to mention anything about me because I would have to answer for it. Multiple people remember me asking them to delete certain posts, or just be careful not to give out that I was doing anything with them. I was abnormal and an immature adult for wanting to spend a bit of time with or buy a gift for my friend on their birthday. We had an age gap, and at first, it was all "you're probably more mature than me :)" - until it turned to Real Adults Don't Spend Time With Friends, lol. Real adults are 100% focused on their partner. Real adults aren't on social media, and other thinly-veiled degradation + mindfuckery. Funny how my age became a bad thing, but they were the experienced 29-year-old who knowingly pursued the inexperienced 23-year-old.

Near the end of the relationship, I was starting to hide away to spend more time with people who treated me well, and it helped me get out. I saw that the way I felt every day wasn't normal. It reminded me of what good relationships are like and what they feel like. My friends tried their best to be supportive, but it was very difficult because my partner was trying very hard to isolate me from them through threats, aggression and manipulation. I'm incredibly lucky that they stayed by my side and told me that what was happening wasn't normal.

Getting out was hard. Staying out was hard. Even after everything that happened, following the split, I told my friends I didn't know what I would do if they tried to get me back again. SO fucking glad that's over.

[weabooweedwitch]

Most women your age are getting married and starting their families and you've never even had a bf 🤡 it's so over for you better get used to coping with ur crippling loneliness with maladaptive daydreaming, yandere asmr videos, drugs and self-insert fanfic because that's all you'll ever have now. Your youth is gone and you're still fat af even after you lost weight (probably gained it all back by now lmao). You could have made something of urself whem you were 20 by losing weight and going to college but instead you laid around and wasted all of your youth and now it's too late. No man will ever want to deal with your baggage of being poor, old, unwanted, uneducated (lmao how do I have more education than you and I'm 10 years younger? dumbass doesnt even have her GED), cringey age-inappropriate hobbies, mentally ill and not even having the decency to go to therapy and take meds, fat, ugly face, loser and loner with no irl friends, crazy family, looking old for your age, whored yourself out on a sugar daddy website, rotten teeth due to your own laziness, thinning frizzy hair and gross bulky glasses, drug addicted alcoholic who's probably going to be homeless for the majority of her life, mean person attacking minor aged rape victims like jesus christ you're so fucking worthless SO many red flags so much baggage no-one will ever want to deal with that. You don't even know how worthless you are

You know, every time you send me a message like this, I think of the person from your friend group who came forward a while back. You know, the one you don't like to acknowledge tried to apologize on your behalf. Anyways, every time you insult my appearance I just think of what your friend said

So i get it sweetie, youre mad at mommy and daddy and you're lashing out. That's why half the time you're repeating things i previously said back to me and parroting shallow insults with a very small vocabulary. The second i call you fatherless, you call me fatherless. I use thw word maladaptive and, suddenly you know that word too and juat HAVE to use it as well. I get it. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

You're honestly just making yourself look so pitiable. You realize you've already painted yourself as such a dumb jackass that every single time you do this I basically just laugh and ignore you, and then people who know me and are friends or WANT TO be friends with me see how you treat me publicly and they all say "yeah wow who's this absolutely demonic little cunt acting like this without any reason". Like. What is the end goal here. Making yourself look as petty and stupid as possible. Meanwhile, what did someone else in your friend group say? The ones you lied to? Including Callie, the actual victim whose trauma you're basically trying to appropriate for yourself

Anyways yeah I just wanted to like show you the actual screenshots of the conversation I had with your friend back in June, which also to everyone else, yeah June, that's when she lied to her own friends and said she would stop doing this. She lied to her friends because all of them told her this was making them massively uncomfortable, so now she's. Being an internet troll in secret behind their backs 😂 they were going to tattle on you to your mom so you lied so they wouldn't check tumblr anymore because you're such a weird angry little freak that this has become a hobby for you

I'm sad? I'M sad? I don't even know your fucking name meanwhile you've scrolled through all of my blogs repeatedly for months cataloging details about me for the sheer purpose of trying to poorly insult me.

Like genuinely 90% of the reason I'm answering this is to basically wave a flag saying "hey everyone if you've ever seen or received weird asks of photoshopped porn of me or pictures of my actual family taken from their facebooks or saw the transphobic racist fake dating profile she made with one of my selfies or you ever received a bitch lasagna or Zalgo text, it was this cringey little lolcow right here"

But I also wanted to show you screenshot proof that you make your own friends super uncomfortable and that they started talking about your personal business to defend me over you. So. Yeah I guess that stings huh?

[ladyjayde]

POV: Your daughter takes a selfie like a Facebook mom

[everythingaboutjude]

red flag and green flags of Jude based on his mannerisms and vibes : green flags: romantic, touchy, would give you countless hugs, loves to cuddle, love amusement parks, loves chilling at home, has only like 2 real best friends so he will dedicate a lot of time to you, will dedicate goals to you, is the type to take care of the bill ( I mostly think this because I don’t think he would make Toby split when he goes to eat with him since he obviously has more money and can handle it) , will let you borrow his clothes ( I also think this cause he lets Toby use his clothes🤣), will want you to talk to him A LOT, he looks like the type to hold your purse or give you a piggy back ride dkw), he will constantly send you tiktoks( I think this because his alleged reposts are sometimes the same as toby’s so I’m guessing they send each other TikTok’s), will always take pictures of you together ( he takes a lot of selfies so ..), THATS ALL I CAN THINK OF RN🚩 RED FLAGS 🚩 will be very clingy( he’s always hugging up on someone ) , will be very possessive, ( he’s very protective of his family and calls them his three hearts so just imagine what your heart will be to him), has a bit of history of alleged flings,( at the end of day this could be false cause I saw somewhere that Gabriela was a school friend of Toby or they met in college can’t remember but someone showed a facebook pic of her very young and Toby so idk, but I can’t explain other flings like hotel girl and the Mayweather ex girl so who knows what true or not ), will be sassy ( needs no explanation) , he will never say it’s his fault ( he literally never doesn’t argue with referees), he would be very territorial ( he’s litterly backs vini all the time ), you would prolly be his second mom 😭, he loves to be pampered, would need someone to cook his favorite meals, you would have to be the man in the relationship, prolly doesn’t know how to even wash the dishes, he would FaceTime you all the time to know where you at, looks like the type to not want pets, would manipulate you make him do what he says, would prolly mess up your plans because he wants more attention from you, he would prolly move fast in the relationship once you both are committed to each other, would not give you space sometimes when you need it and act like the victim, will prolly make you drive until he gets his license 😭 THATS IT for now . if you couldn’t tell i was bored 🥱

That's interesting 🤔 Thank you for sharing ❤️❤️

[heich0e]

liv i think tobio sends selfies like a Facebook mom… with the low angels or the ones where his face is all twisted and he’s trying to show u that he arrived at his destination safely…

babe he takes selfies/pics with his ipad i know it in my heart...

[atotalpitch]

in line w your post about Insta caption; your headcanon about how each Bella uses emoji, what they post on social media and how they'd caption everything?

word count is 1,5k for this one who's surprised??? you genuinely cannot send me an ask and not get answer longer than the fics that i write sigh i kind of went off the rails a bit and forgot about the “how they’d caption everything” part of the question, but here’s a detailed rant of how each of them texts and uses social media:

Chloe: where do i even begin? i feel like she has auto-caps on and uses a shit ton of emojis, but for their actual purpose instead of ironically. she does not send a single text without At Least two hearts, and is definitely not a dry texter by any means. also, according to everyone she has ever been in contact with, she has a habit of sending ten texts in a row instead of just writing everything into one message, which is denied within four seconds of it being brought up. (“but it’s easier to read separate, short messages!” “it’s just how i would talk in real life, you know!”) she has two accounts on instagram, one which is public and one which is private. on the public one she posts aesthetically and has a theme which she strictly follows. the posts are mostly about cute animals she takes care of, or major events. private on the other hand? it basically contains her Entire life – all ups and downs included – and a shit ton of random pictures of Beca. it’s only followed by the Bellas and some of her closest family. twitter, facebook and tiktok (which she would never admit to having) are on a different level. what that implies is very much up for interpretation. she’s one of those pinterest users, and has a board for Everything. has regular meetups with Aubrey when they just gush over their pinterest feeds, dream weddings, etc. (whatever it is that those people do idk)

Aubrey: perfect grammar and punctuation, one emoji per message. a facebook mom, if you will. she gets teased for it endlessly but her response is always something like “why would i use texting for anything other than it’s purpose of informing others?”

if you bring up social media in her presence, she will scowl at you and let you believe that she absolutely despises every form of online contacting. however, she will go back home and sit on Her Armchair with a glass of fucking expensive red wine and go through every single one of your social media accounts from tumblr to linkedin (stalker much?). not that she posts anywhere, except for twitter where she just lets hell loose every once in a blue moon. she does have an instagram account as well though, but just for liking other peoples posts as she claims if someone happens to ask (despite her story always having at least twenty random pictures at any given time of the day)

Amy: … she’s, well, Amy. she texts with full caps or no caps, always with at least five typos even if it’s just two words. it’s Something, how she manages to do that every single time. she’s a tiktok emoji trend user (eg. skull for laughing) which confuses others (read: Aubrey, who isn’t on tiktok) a lot.

her social media is full of memes, random selfies, “inspirational” quotes that are more or less insane, and pictures of food. she, for some reason, went viral on tiktok and has like two million followers. (nobody knows why, which is probably for the better.) on twitter, she mostly just retweets crazy shit and thirsts over celebrities Very openly. then there’s reddit… yeah,, there’s reddit. she doesn’t really use other socials, but does have accounts literally everywhere.

Stacie: as i said in the post that inspired this ask, she texts like Alexis (her actress) writes her instagram captions. so basically just a lot of dragged out words, a bunch of emojis and abbreviations and that stuff. i don’t know to describe it, so. take that as you will. im not sure how many of you follow her anyway .

our girl is for sure, without a doubt, a tiktok thirst trapper. she does it unintentionally at first, but when she goes viral she starts doing it for fun (almost like a hobby). her comments used to be flooded by creepy men, but once she put the bi flag in her bio they seemingly disappeared and were replaced by the army of “#wlw? we won” people. Aubrey’s not too happy about her posting herself like that, but she thinks it’s whatever as long as Stacie runs every video through her (not in a controlling way. she’s just also one of those lesbians who drool over her.) Stacie’s instagram is also kinda similar, but with pictures instead of videos. they’re subtle and barely revealing for the most part, but she looks good in literally anything so she has a lot of followers anyway. that’s where her social media use ends, save for the private twitter account that she uses to bully the rest of the Bellas.

Beca: she texts in all lowercase, but decent grammar anyways. she’s not exactly big on emojis, but slips them in every few messages (she’s a chronic frowning emoji user, that’s for sure). i don’t know how else to describe her texting?? she usually doesn’t even reply with other than half a sentence or a barely coherent abbreviation

she’s famous, so her socials are mostly “official” and really, Really lack personality. naturally, she has private accounts which her closest circle of people follow. she doesn’t post though, mainly just replies to other people. (well, maybe she accidentally clicks post on random memes sometimes, but you really don’t need to know that.) Batshit Crazy Reddit User™ and will use it as a reliable source for anything. you can also find her at 3am doomscrolling on twitter.

Emily: oh god. she texts like she just got a phone and is generally as awkward as when talking. kinda like Chloe, she’ll send a thousand texts in a row in the same way she stumbles over her words irl. she spams people with only emojis, and doesn’t Make Sense most of the time. but she’s Emily, so they let it slide.

she’s not that big on social media (follower wise) but active? hell yes. she posts something every. single. day. whether its a mirror selfie or a cute flower she saw on her way to yoga (she does yoga. yeah. i know. crazy.) you can pretty much imagine Hailee’s insta up until like 2020 but double the amount of posts. there’s never too much filters or hashtags for her, and she unfortunately did not grow out of the 2013(-ish) filter phase. she unironically uses facebook and watches instagram reels, and nobody bats an eye anymore when she giggles and sends a link to a puppy video from the deep dark archives of facebook. any other form of social media she stays away from, especially twitter (she has an account but zero posts or replies). she does learn pinterest from Chloe at some point, so that becomes a big thing for her eventually though.

Cynthia Rose: she texts in the closest way to normal possible. she uses auto-caps, a decent amount of emojis that actually make sense, and abbreviations that everyone can understand. but she does have a middle-aged man edge to it sometimes. she’s an influencer. not that kind of “grwm to go shopping” one, but she fights for rights, talks about representation, and brings out the voices of minorities. she runs campaigns, interviews people, and activist type of stuff. it’s a good thing and she’s happy about what she does (even if she does spend all day everyday working for it despite doing it for free). but, sticking to the running theme, she has a private twitter account. her header is a lesbian quote with two pairs of scissors, and her posts are just plain Insane. she mostly uses it to bully Beca for literally no reason at all. 

Flo: texts like a wine aunt. that’s it. there’s no other way i can describe it.

she has an instagram for her juice truck, and it has a bunch of followers all around the world who are interested in watching her move from one place to another. she also posts tutorials how to make her juices at home (especially during the pandemic), and she’s basically sponsored by a million companies just because she gave them recipes lol. on her personal account, she’s also kind of an influencer too. she mostly posts about fashion and food, maybe sometimes stray cats that walk up to her on the streets when she’s going around with her truck. she’s not really famous famous, but has like 30k followers. i feel like i’m just gonna say the same for them all, but she also has a priv twitter account for the sole purpose of including herself in the crazy ass threads where all of the other Bellas are just, going mental. she’s also a pinterest / aesthetic moodboard tumblr girly methinks. 

Lilly: you can only imagine how she texts, if she even does. ominous as fuck. i’m leaving it at that because shes just so,,,,,, well you know.

she doesn’t use social media as far as anyone knows, and she barely has a working phone number. but if we are being real, does anyone really know anything about her anyway???

Ashley + Jessica: i have zero idea??? it’s hard to give personalities to characters whose names are barely confirmed. but i’m guessing they’re the most “normal” out of them all. you know, casual texting and barely posting anywhere. it’s odd. but they are still bellas and we love them. 

[usuallymyenthusiast]

I need a distraction from the premiere. slight nsfw warning?

it was hard to pick just one for each 😭 feel free to tag/reply with your favorite headcanons! I love getting new ones. and pls rb if you want!

[jackfrombaskinrobbins]

sam wilson x teen!reader headcanons

type of writing: headcanons / scenario

word count: 634

request: yes / no

original request: omg hi!! i absolutely adore your writing 💕 would you be open to doing some headcanons for sam wilson and a teen!reader? have a wonderful day, love <;33

dynamic: sam wilson x teen!reader

characters: sam wilson, reader

a/n: heh inspiration struck so two in one day it is 😈😈 i LOVED writing this request omg. i'm totally obsessed w/ sam wilson so i was sooo happy this was requested!! ty anon :D

taglist: @nutellani @thecloudedmind

(fill out this form to be on my taglist!)

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sam gives such older brother vibes to me

like no matter how old u are he’ll always treat you like a little sibling

well he and bucky both

at this point they’re a package deal

a lot of ur time is spent settling their argument

“hey, y/n. who pulls off this hat the best?”

“y/n!!! pancakes or waffles??”

“y/n tell bucky he’s wrong.”

theres a lot of that LMAO

anyways i feel like he would make u do stuff with him

like fun little adventures

y’all learned to crochet together

and u were pretty good ngl

but poor sam kept missing stiches

you made little frogs and his looked not rly like a frog

but u loved it anyway ofc

the two of you usually do grocery runs together

that’s like high time for ur gossip 😏

i mean guys this is sam wilson

he def knows a LOT of stuff

but he’s really engaged with like ur school & home life

he always makes sure ur ok

he is totally the type to text and call regularly

he would go to ur parent teacher conferences if u needed him to

and then he’d tell u all his thoughts about the teacher after 😭 

he’s rly perceptive with emotions

i mean he was a therapist like what do u expect

but whenever he senses ur down he’ll do something really nice

and like cook u something

bc sam can COOK

like COOK

and he’ll try to make you laugh

which always works because he’s actually hilarious

speaking of he’s so funny on missions too

he’s always talking on the earpieces and like he’ll just say the funniest stuff

and he swears like a sailor JUST SAYING 🤪

he’s so the type to swear in front of you all the time but then the moment u swear he’s like “what did you say 🤨🤨”

also he always is asking u fashion advice

“ok y/n. blue shirt red pants? or red shirt blue pants?”

“sam do you really want to look like one fish two fish red fish blue fish”

“yeah i guess you’re right 😞”

he always acts sad and then the moment you feel bad he’s like “GOTCHA 😜”

also whenever he’s away he’ll send you a ton of pictures

a lot of them are selfies of him and bucky and steve 

and they’re so funny

like he’s not trying to be funny but he literally is like a facebook minion meme mom

oh also no offense to him but he’s an AWFUL driver 😭 

like he goes way too fast and his music is so loud

but he lets u choose it so u don’t mind 🤩

it’s always kind of fun going in the car with him

you always text natasha a picture of u with him in the driver’s seat in the background and you say “if i die u know why”

and she just goes “have fun”

lol

you and him go on runs together

and that’s rly fun

well ok ik running is hard

but as a runner its sooo much more fun suffering through it with someone else 🥳

whenever u run u do that like shareplay thing on spotify

and he always judges ur music like 😑

ok mr “i listen to the same album for like five months in a row”

oh he is so the type to take u on like one on one lunches and stuff

i think that’s smth the avengers would do with their younger members to make sure they’re alright

and he always does it with u bc ur best friends ofc ‼️

y’all are so petty to each other

but u do really think the world of him

and he thinks the world of you too 🫶

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[rydiathesummoner]

Sylvestre is Suburban Baseball Mom

We all know Sylvestre is a shitty parent to Dion, and due to the circumstances in the story he seems exaggerated. But as a parent, I have seen firsthand over and over that Sylvestre is a shitty parent, but he's also a depressingly common parent.

If Sylvestre and Dion lived in 2024, I can already predict exactly how it would go. Dion would absolutely be the straight-A sports star student. Sylvestre would have his Facebook profile totally public from the moment Dion was born with weekly posts of his amazing and perfect child. Look at my son, walking at 7 months! Look at my son, learning to talk and read early! Look at my son, starting baseball at 3! Here's a post of his first home run! Here's 500 posts of our perfectly lit, professionally taken family photos!

Everyone goes on about what a great and involved father Sylvestre is. He goes to EVERY baseball game. He even pays for private baseball lessons to make sure Dion stays at the top of his game! He talks with his buddies all the time about Dion. Dion was MVP last game! Dion hit 5 home runs! Dion got straight A's again this year, of course!

But nobody takes notice of the things Sylvestre DOESN'T say. There are no random lunch selfies of Facebook. He stopped reading to Dion in kindergarten because Dion can now read to himself. He didn't brag to his buddies about Dion's 1550 SAT score because it wasn't a 1600. Sylvestre doesn't scold Dion when his team loses, he just says nothing at all. It never occurred to Dion to ask himself if he even likes baseball. It's just a part of his life. Dion has said absolutely nothing to his father about his "friend" Terence because he just doesn't want the drama of disappointing his father. Sylvestre doesn't have a problem with gay men, really! He's not a bigot! It's OK when other people's sons are gay! Just... not his. I mean, how would Sylvestre explain that to the neighbors? It's just too complicated so no, his pride and joy is Totally Straight.

Then later in life when Dion yeets a spear through his chest doesn't call or visit for Christmas Sylvestre is all like "my son is so ungrateful! After all I did for him!" when all he needed to do was read books with his kid and ask how he likes baseball.

[shadowfromthestarlight]

People share a great deal of their personal lives with people who aren't close friends and family members, and even with people they don't know at all. The merits of that have been debated and can still be debated. But we're not only sharing more. We're actively planning parts of our lives around sharing. That's not brand new. People have been known to visit beautiful or difficult-to-access places for the sake of a photo, and even died taking selfies on the edges of cliffs. But that hasn't stopped everyone from doubling down, it seems.

I started thinking about this the other day after I watched a Facebook friend's pregnancy announcement: a video compilation of her reacting to the positive test, telling her husband, and telling her parents. I thought it was sweet, at first, but then it occurred to me that she had had to set up her phone ahead of time to record her reaction if she got a positive result. Then she had to position her phone at a good vantage point to capture her husband's reaction. And, days later, she had to position her phone at a restaurant table to capture her mom's reaction to finding out she was going to be a grandmother. It all meant that these moments were planned in advance for maximum sharing potential.

And of course, this is just an example. People do things like this all the time nowadays. And it might seem harmless enough now. But is it harmless in the long run?

Relatedly, I follow a person on LinkedIn who has garnered a following over the past couple of years posting not only about his niche field of law practice, but how he runs his office, tales from his past experiences at other firms, how he manages his personal time, his dog, and the dinners he cooks on weekends. He has a new post up almost every day. This week, he's already posted twice about his vacation - one about why vacation is important, and one about his experience with the TSA. I like this guy. I think he's insightful a lot of the time. And other times I get the impression that he was reflecting on his day, wondering what detail he could spin into a story on LinkedIn that would keep the attention coming. Whether he's doing it because he thinks his audience is waiting to hear from him, or because he wants to get his name out there for business reasons, is it perhaps a little sad that he's constantly analyzing his day-to-day life this way?

And I'm not above similar behavior. This year, I've been taking a lot of pictures of trees, flowers, birds, and village scenes not just so I can enjoy them personally, but with the firm intention of making a 12-month compilation to be posted on social media. I'll see something I want to put in the compilation and keep trying until I get the "shareable" photo. I wouldn't say it's gotten to the point where I'm missing the joy of the moment because I'm thinking about the photos, but I know it's something to watch because it could certainly get there.

All this has me thinking...

What are the long-term consequences of being a culture that encourages and rewards turning the most intimate and precious moments with our families into a production for public spectacle?

What are the long-term consequences of being a culture that incentivizes turning the most mundane and routine aspects of your life and work into fodder for more followers, more clients, more money, and more influence?

And are we really doing anyone a kindness in the long run when we feed into this culture by liking and sharing this type of content?

I don't know that anyone truly has the answer right now, or if there is only one answer, but I think those are questions worth pondering.